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arse-crack-thistle · 4 years

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rwrb winterfest - day 18 - music

@rwrb-fests

in which my dear princess bea needs a little comfort at christmastime (ace rep)

Bea always has a hard time around Christmas.

Part of it has to do with her father. She seems to find new pieces of him to miss every day. Today, it’s his laugh—the deep chuckle he lets out when David jumps on his lap and licks his face or when he’s had a little too much brandy and Bea says something sarcastic and rude about her grandmother.

She misses how the family used to gather around a table in one of the sitting rooms in Kensington and play gin rummy at Christmastime. The tree would stand tall in the corner. Their father insisted they decorate it themselves, despite Philip’s disapproval. It looked sloppy covered in tinsel and an assortment of colorful lights and ornaments. The star at the top tilted towards the left, but at least the tree filled the room with a delicate pine scent. The fire burned at a soft glow, and everyone around the table laughed and wore paper crowns from their Christmas crackers. It didn’t matter who they were, they were just a normal family.

Now, the room feels cold, even though the fire cracks across from her. In the corner, the bare tree sags. She hasn’t had the energy to decorate it herself since Henry’s been in New York, and while she and Philip have reconciled their differences, he’s never really liked this part of their family’s traditions. Her mother works a ton since stepping up as the heir apparent, so Bea didn’t want to bother her either. Her cat meows next to her on the couch.

Christ, she wants a hit. She wants something to wipe her memory and just let her be. She just might reach for the brandy on the liquor cart. Why did she convince Henry she could handle it being here? Or that she could handle him leaving?

No, he needs to live his life without her, even if she misses him. The hardest part about being ace is watching her people find their person.

She’s happy for Henry and she loves Alex, but she’s lonely when they’re gone. And with loneliness comes dark thoughts. And the chance she will relapse multiplies.

Bea should call her sponsor. Or Henry. Or literally anyone. She knows they’ll answer. She knows she’s loved. But the only person she wants to hold her and make Christmas special again can’t.

She really misses her father.

Bea leaves the room. She puts as much space between her and the brandy as she can. When her fingers itch for something, she must fill them, and the best remedy is music.

Her favorite room in this place looks exactly how she left it the day before. The piano sits, awaiting Henry. The mismatch of rugs were her idea—benders with musicians in Galway inspired her, or what she remembered of them did. The cat finds her way to her spot on the brown settee.

Before picking up a guitar, Bea passes tchotchkes from their travels on an antique side table. Nesting dolls from Russia. A Statue of Liberty figurine from their first trip to the U.S. A toorstag from Henry’s month in Mongolia. A coconut bra from Bea’s drunk cruise in the Caribbean. She’s since become a more sensitive and culturally-minded traveler.

She sits with the instrument on the floor, her back against the settee. This particular guitar was a gift from her father on her fourteenth birthday. It was handmade for her, and her initials sit just below the artisan’s label under the sound hole. The koa wood has a rich, dark finish; Bea likes to drag her finger across the wood grain when she’s deciding what to play next or when she’s lost in her thoughts in between songs. When her father first gave it to her, the sound was bright and lively, but in the time since, it’s become mellow and warm. Perfect for fingerpicking.

She plays a few chords as she tunes it. Her cat purrs behind her ear. Crystal from the chandelier above her twinkles. She settles in the quiet moment and plays.

But there’s no heart in it.

Bea thought if she changed her scenery, if she gave herself something to do, she’d get out of this riptide. But every song, every passing minute, pulls her further and further out.

If no one’s around to hear her play, is it really music?

Is this her safe space if no one’s here to create its harmony with her?

She’s so lonely.

And the tune is as frozen as she feels.

It’s times like these she wishes she wanted her grandmother’s happily ever after—marry a man, pop out a couple of kids, and be a dutiful royal. But she can’t. The thought of marrying someone, of making and raising children, of being a mindless princess puppet actually nauseates her.

If only she had her own community of people like her, she might be able to rely on Henry less. Her other married friends wouldn’t feel so bad for her. She could just go on ignoring her grandmother and Philip, when he gets to be too much. Her mother wouldn’t worry as much.

And not that she wouldn’t miss her father less, but maybe she wouldn’t feel so empty without him here.

Maybe the soul could find its way back into her music.

So Bea snaps herself out of it just enough to text Pez and ask for his Instagram login. She has a plan that her handler—and her grandmother, for that matter—would definitely disapprove of.

But fuck the crown.

Bea needs to take her life in her own hands and demand more for herself. She needs help to feel better, but she has to be the one to initiate. If Henry could do it, so could she.

Part of the AA mantra is to have the courage to change the things she can.

She’s got it, and she can do it.

Pez responds quickly and without question, of course. She sets her guitar to the side and downloads the app. After she logs in, she leans forward and rests the phone against the floor pouf in front of her.

Bea takes a deep breath and starts a livestream, and the viewer count immediately skyrockets. Her grandmother is really going to hate this.

“Um, hello,” she says. “I’m sure you all weren’t expecting to see me, but our friend, Percy, was kind enough to lend me his account for a short while. I hope that’s all right.”

She shifts a little uncomfortably. She never minded the spotlight as long as she could control it, but even now, she feels more venerable than ever. Last year’s Christmas pajamas hang loosely on her. Surely, her reindeer bottoms will go viral, as she sits with her legs crisscrossed in full view of the camera. Her cat mews.

“Yes, thank you for that, darling,” She says to her and then looks to the camera.

“I just wanted to come on here to talk to you all. See, as we’re in the holiday season, it’s all a bit overwhelming, isn’t it? And in all of this hustle and bustle, one finds they get a bit lost along the way.

“I’ve noticed this in myself every year, but this time it’s more frustrating. I’ve just been feeling rather lonely lately, as one can during this chilly time, so I thought maybe you lot have experienced that as well. I wanted to connect with people like me. I don’t mean, like, I want to wallow in my problems—or that I have especially difficult problems—I mean I know I’m very fortunate—I just—um. Let me—let me straighten this out.”

She sighs. This could be a disaster. She could come off entitled and whiny if she doesn’t focus more on her words.

“It seems the people in my life all have a partner, and I am so happy for them, truly. But I don’t want a partner or a relationship of any nature other than friendship. And so during this time of year—and, I suppose, other times as well—I find myself the odd woman out.

“For example, here I am, alone in this place, with only my cat, with whom you’ve already become acquainted. Now, I know I’m very lucky to have this, but it’s empty houses that can lead people down a dark path, isn’t it?”

Bea needs to say the words. She needs to make it very clear. She watches the screen flood with comments and hearts. Hundreds of thousands of people are watching, and tomorrow she’s going to be on every media outlet.

“I’m aromantic and asexual, if that wasn’t clear. I can’t and don’t want to fall in love, and not that it’s anyone’s business, I’m not even faintly interested in sex. And that may be confusing for some of you, but for me, it makes my life, my mind, make sense.”

She’s slowly but surely finding her way back to shore now.

“For years, I thought there was something wrong with me, but there’s not. I thought the only way I could be happy was to be in a relationship, but it’s not. And if you yourself are ace as well, I want you to know you’re not alone.

“This is the real reason why I did all of this. I was lonely and sad tonight, and I wanted you all to know that if you feel that too, it’s okay. I hope I can learn about and grow in the ace community—not to replace my happily coupled friends, but to explore new friendships with people who can understand what I and some of you are going though.

“We’ve been taught that there’s one way to be happy, and I just don’t think that’s true. And I’m willing to prove it if you’ll help me. Starting now.”

Bea reaches for her guitar and places it in her lap. She finds the first chord of “Horchata” by Vampire Weekend. A text notification from Henry pops down.

HOLY SHIT I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

A smile creeps up her cheeks.

“Something I love to do when I’m down is to pick out a little tune. If it’s all right with you, I thought I’d play a round for us. Maybe answer a few questions if you’ve got any.”

Bea picks the first note, and the tone is perfect.

She feels warmth grow in her chest and travel around her arms and down her back.

Like her father hugging her from behind, arms crossed over her shoulders.

Just like he used to do many Christmases ago.

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reading-writing-revolution · 4 years

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Heather Cox Richardson

January 2, 2021 (Saturday)

Today the fight to pick up Trump’s supporters continued. Eleven senators, led by Ted Cruz (R-TX), said they would object to certifying certain state electoral votes when Congress meets on Wednesday, January 6, to count them. They want a commission appointed to audit the results. This attempt is separate from the one launched yesterday by Josh Hawley (R-MO) to object to the counting of the electoral votes from Pennsylvania, but both are a transparent attempt to court Trump voters before 2022 and 2024.

The senators signing onto the effort are: Ron Johnson (R-WI), James Lankford (R-OK), Steve Daines (R-MT), John Kennedy (R-LA), Marsha Blackburn (R-TN), and Mike Braun (R-IN), and Senators-Elect Cynthia Lummis (R-WY), Roger Marshall (R-KS), Bill Hagerty (R-TN), and Tommy Tuberville (R-AL).

President-Elect Joe Biden’s transition spokesperson Michael Gwin called their efforts a “stunt.” He isn’t wrong. This plan is unfounded. Biden won the election by more than 7 million votes and by a margin of 306 to 232 in the Electoral College. The Trump campaign tried to challenge the results in the courts, and lost or had dismissed for lack of evidence 60 out of 61 cases, including two they tried to take to the Supreme Court, where three justices appointed by Trump himself sit. Although Trump supporters grabbed headlines with their accusations of irregularities and fraud when they made them in conference rooms and in parking lots in front of landscaping companies, they could produce no evidence in courtrooms, where there are penalties for lying. The suggestion that there is somehow a problem with this election, when they could produce no evidence of wrongdoing in front of judges in 60 cases, is laughable.

But there is more to their efforts than just creating a show to attract the future support of Trump voters. The attempt of these Trump Republicans to launch yet another baseless investigation is in keeping with their use of investigations to discredit Democrats since at least the 2012 attack on two U.S. government facilities in Benghazi, Libya, which killed four Americans. Ten investigations of the circumstances that led to that attack resulted in no evidence that members of the Obama administration acted inappropriately in that crisis. But the constant repetition of accusations convinced many Americans that something had gone terribly wrong and Obama’s people, especially Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, were to blame.

As House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy, then in running for Speaker of the House, said to Fox News Channel personality Sean Hannity in 2015, “Everybody thought Hillary Clinton was unbeatable, right? But we put together a Benghazi special committee, a select committee. What are her numbers today? Her numbers are dropping. Why? Because she's untrustable. But no one would have known any of that had happened, had we not fought."

The repeated Republican investigations into then-Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s emails were similar. Although the State Department’s final report on Clinton’s email use, issued in October 2019, declared there was no systematic or deliberate mishandling of classified information, the constant barrage of accusations made the email story the most important story of the 2016 election. It outweighed all the scandals involving then-candidate Donald Trump: the ones involving sexual assault, financial corruption, mocking of a disabled reporter, attacks on immigrants, and so on.

A study by Duncan J. Watts and David M. Rothschild in the Columbia Journalism Review noted that in the 2016 election season there were 65,000 sentences in the media about Clinton’s email use but only 40,000 about all of Trump’s scandals combined. There were twice as many sentences about Clinton’s emails than about her policies. The authors wrote, "in just six days, The New York Times ran as many cover stories about Hillary Clinton’s emails as they did about all policy issues combined in the 69 days leading up to the election.” The email scandal likely cost Clinton the 2016 election, and even now, after the State Department cleared her of wrongdoing, many Americans still think Clinton mishandled classified information in her emails.

Trump tried the same tactic in 2020. Smearing an opponent through investigations was at the heart of the Ukraine scandal of 2019. Trump pressured new Ukraine president Volodymyr Zelensky, not to start an investigation of Hunter Biden and the company on whose board he had sat, but rather simply to announce that he was starting an investigation. An announcement would be enough to get picked up by the American news media so that story after story would convince voters that Hunter Biden and, by extension, his father were involved in corruption, even without evidence.

Then, just before the election, Trump’s lawyer Rudy Giuliani drummed up the story that Hunter Biden had left a laptop that contained incriminating evidence against both Bidens at a repair shop, and Republican leadership clamored for investigations-- this time to no avail because the story was so outrageous.

Now, they are alleging the need for an investigation into irregularities in the 2020 election, although they have failed repeatedly to produce any evidence of such irregularities in court. Their argument is that the country needs an investigation to relieve people’s worries about the legitimacy of the election, but those worries have been created precisely by the unjustified accusations of Republican leaders. An investigation would simply convince people that the election results are questionable. They are not.

The attempt of the senators to get Congress to appoint an investigatory committee into alleged fraud in the election is dangerous and unprecedented, and they know it. In their statement, they tried to suggest they are simply following the precedent established by Congress after the chaotic 1876 election, but the two situations are very different.

In 1876, elections were organized by the parties themselves and were notoriously corrupt. Parties printed their own ballots in a distinctive color with only their own slate of electors. Men dropped the ballots for their party, unmarked, into a box, but their votes were not secret: how men voted was obvious from the colored ballots, at the very least. Politicians watching the polls knew exactly what the counts would be, and it was not unusual for ballot boxes to be either stuffed or broken open before results were reported.

In Florida, Louisiana, and South Carolina in 1876, Democrats appeared to have won the election, but there was no dispute that they had terrorized Republican voters to keep them from the polls. The results were a hopeless mess: in South Carolina, for example, 101% of all eligible voters cast ballots. Florida and Louisiana both reported more reasonable numbers of voters, but they each sent competing sets of electors to Congress. In both states, different officials signed off on different certificates of election, so it was not at all clear which certificate was the official one. In this utter confusion, Congress established a committee to figure out what had actually happened.

None of that is the case today. The processes were transparent and observed by Republicans as well as Democrats. The Trump campaign had the right to challenge vote counts and did so; each turned up virtually the same result as the original count: Biden won, by a lot. Each state in the country has delivered to Congress certified results that have been signed by the state governors, who nowadays have the final say in the state certification process.

This should be a done deal. But Trump Republicans are trying to undermine the election, and Biden’s administration, with a disinformation campaign. This is about more than this particular election. It is clear that a faction of today’s Republican Party refuses to accept the legitimacy of a Democratic president, no matter how big the victory. They are working to smear Biden by investigation, as has become their signature move.

Democracy depends on a willingness to transfer power peacefully from one group of leaders to another. By revealing that they refuse to do so, the members of the “Sedition Caucus,” as they are being called on social media, are proving they are unworthy of elected office.

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newagesispage · 3 years

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JULY 2021

THE RIB PAGE

*****

They are still uncovering statues on Easter Island.

*****

Everyone is talking about ‘Exterminate all the Brutes” from Raoul Peck.

*****

Vampire bats, prevalent in Latin America may be on the way to the U.S.

*****

What they call faith, I call strength.

*****

Criss angel will open CABLP, a restaurant in Overton, Nevada. The letters stand for breakfast, lunch and pizza and will include a free meal outreach program to help under privileged and pediatric cancer families.

*****

A fifth ocean in Antartica??** There have also found 4 new ocean species: Apolemia, Tegula Kusairo, Leptarma Biju and Duobrachium Sparksae.

*****

In China they have found a possible new species in a skull that is 140,000 years old.

*****

Why would Jeffrey Toobin be back at CNN?? Surely there are more young deserving talking heads around.

*****

The Keystone pipeline is dead.

*****

5,000 pounds of explosives were discovered in a home in South LA. LAPD seems to have detonated the fireworks in a truck right there in the neighborhood. They were too dangerous to transport but not enough to blow them up??? How stupid are these people??

*****

Days alert : So glad to see Clyde again even if it is only for a moment!! **BTW, I do not understand the Daytime Emmy noms this year as they relate to Days. I really was pulling for Victoria Koneful (Ciara) and she won but George DelHoya (Orpheus), Tamara Braun (Ava) and Cady McClain (Jennifer)??? I was shocked when Cady McClain won. I mean, she was so whiny. I question my own ability to judge a performance. In most categories, the winner was usually the one I thought was the worst option. I was happy for Max Gail and CBS Sunday Morning. Some performances were sure overlooked. What about James Read (Clyde), Paul Telfer (Xander), Bryan Dattilo (Lucas), Robert Scott Wilson (Ben), Daniel Kerr (Eli) and Lindsay Arnold (Allie) ?? As annoying as the Kristen character is and as long as it took me to get used to Stacy Haiduk in the role, she kicked ass this year. Did they even submit clips?? And, they are not often on but Tony and Anna forever!!!!!!** And how wonderful is it to see the Dimera boys all together and recounting the whole fam for the votes? **And one more thing, Days was not even nominated for writing while Bold and the Beautiful spends every other show with the Liam character standing in front of the fireplace making excuses for the same shit! Just push repeat, C,mon!!**Philip had a great line for Brady about following Kristen like a zombie.** Dis Eli really say, “Peacock and chill??’ Are these the things they will have to do to do to stay on the air? It took me right out of the show. It was the same day the ads for Days on Peacock started. OMG

*****

Texas Gov. Abbott vetoed a bill that would make it illegal to chain up dogs without water.**ATexas churches have lost their 501(c) (3) status because it actively ‘educates’ its members on electing specific Republican politicians. –Pete West* This should have been happening long ago. Many churches I know of do this and should not be allowed to have it both ways. #tax the church

*****

Ellen Burstyn, Jane Curtin, Loretta Devine, Christopher Lloyd, James Caan, French Stewart and Ann-Margaret in Queen Bees and directed by Michael Lembeck?? Yes please!!

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NY has suspended Giuliani’s law license.

*****

Miracle Workers: The Oregon Trail is coming to TBS, this will be season 3 in the series.

*****

What is this about Bowen Yang?? A podcast about a sperm bank heist?? Yeow!!

*****

David Geffen has given $150,000,000 to Yale drama school: Every student will be tuition- free in perpetuity.

*****

Allison Mack was sentenced to 3 years.

*****

The latest in sexual assault news: James Franco has agreed to 2.2 mil settlement in sexual misconduct case.** Kyle Massey was charged with immoral communication with a minor.**Bill Cosby is out and here are some reactions: A terrible wrong is being righted.: a miscarriage of justice is corrected. I fully support survivors of sexual assault coming forward.- Phylicia Rashad*I really don’t ever want to hear again as to why many survivors don’t report their rape or assault.- Charlotte Clymer* Women are showing great restraint in not burning everything to the ground right now and I don’t know how they do it.-Jeff Tiedrich

*****

Amazon is making a series of A League of Their Own with Nick Offerman as the coach.

*****

Does anyone else have family members that are rich, transient, know it all snobs??

*****

It looks like New York’s ranked choice voting is leaning toward Eric Adams for Mayor.

*****

Michigan republicans investigating voter fraud found 2 incidents. One is for a lady who voted by mail and then died, the other was confusion over a man who had the same name as his Father. That was it!

*****

Jamie Lee Curtis will get the Golden Lion for lifetime achievement at the 78th Venice International Film Fest in September.

*****

Jerry Seinfeld will star in and direct ‘Unfrosted’ about Pop-Tarts.

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Why is Airbnb still listing properties in illegal settlements and outposts in Palestinian occupied territories? –James J. Zogby

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Merrick Garland has announced that the Justice department sued Georgia over the voting rights.

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The NFL says that it will halt the use of “race norming” which assumed black players started out with lower cognitive functioning in a $1 billion settlement of brain injury claims. The practice had made it harder for black players to qualify. –The Associated Press.

*****

Scary Clown 45 ended his ‘From the desk of Donald J. Trump’ blog after 29 days. Word is that he felt he was being mocked in the media.

*****

Religious leadership keeps engaging in partisan politics on behalf of politicians that are particularly unpopular with younger people and they wonder why younger people are disenchanted with the church. – Schooley ** Give young people credit as well for seeing through the hype and lies of these religious hypocrites who use God only as a weapon and a threat. –Larry Charles

*****

Amazon will stop drug testing for employment. Can every other company jump on this bandwagon? Let’s judge employees on the work they give.

*****

The Backstreet Boys and NSync are going to work together??!!

*****

Showtime is bringing back American Gigolo with Jon Bernthal.

*****

If Biden can carry out air strikes without proper authorization, the Senate can raise the minimum wage without the Parliamentarian. –Alexandra M. Hunt

Reality Winner is out!!

*****

Judy Woodruff has been given the Peabody award for journalistic integrity.

*****

Donald Glover is bringing us Hive. Malia Obama will be a writer.

*****

Nicholas Cage has married Riko Shibata.

*****

Catch and Kill: The podcast tapes, is here on HBO.

*****

Bryan Cranston and Annette Bening will star in Jerry and Marge go large.

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Amblin Partners and Netflix are partners.

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Fall 2022 will bring the Roybal School of film and television production for underserved communities. They are looking to help 9th, 10th, 11th and 12th grade students. Among others, the program was cofounded by George Clooney, Don Cheadle, Kerry Washington, Mindy Kaling and Eva Longoria.

*****

Will there be a Wedding Crashers2??

*****

The Mysterious Benedict Society stars Tony Hale.** I would love to see he and Danny Pudi in something together.

*****

Actor Stephen Amell from Arrow was removed from a plane after getting into it with his wife. A source said he was drunk and screaming. An official source said that they removed “an unruly customer.”** Andy Dick was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon, allegedly assaulting his partner, Lucas with a metal chair.

*****

So.. Fox news was digitally altering the faces of people they did not care for??? Is there no end to their bullshit????

*****

Mark Ronson is set to marry Grace Gummer.

*****

Crime shows seem to be in the cycle of prisoners and the women who get a thrill from helping them escape.

*****

Wolfgang Van Halen has released a debut album: Mammoth

*****

Everyone seems to love Danny Trejo’s memoir and its honesty.

*****

David Spade will take over as host of Bachelor in Paradise.

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I am sickened when I see the first question that pops up on an online search is the net worth of a person. Oh this twisted world.

*****

Life is a short pause between 2 great mysteries. –Jung

*****

Prince Harry and Meghan had a daughter that they named Lilibet ‘Lili” Diana.

*****

Michael Flynn’s brother Charles (who withheld help from the capitol on Jan. 6), leads the U.S. Army Pacific and commands 90,000 troops.

*****

I am so excited to read ‘The Boys’ from Clint and Ron Howard, due out in October.

*****

Dave Chappelle closed out the Tribeca film fest with a surprise concert. This was the first in person film fest since Covid. Look for This time, this place which premiered there.

*****

Ron Wood will release the album Mr. Luck: A tribute to Jimmy Reed on Sept. 3

*****

Howard Stern signed a new $500 mil contract with Sirius XM. He is taking the whole summer off and many fans say they will cancel their subscription because they don’t want to pay for a summer of reruns.

*****

Acorn will bring Jane Seymour back to a series. Seymour will be co -executive produce on Harry Wild. Her character will be a retired University professor who loves her whiskey and solves crimes.

*****

Annie Murphy stasr in ‘Kevin can f*** himself about a sitcom wife which airs on AMC.

*****

I still do not understand why Rep. Mike Nearman hasn’t been arrested for letting insurrectionists into the Capitol.

*****

There is a wing shortage??

*****

The Pulitzer prizes have been announced. The list includes Ben Faub, Barry Blitt, Katori Hall, Emilio Morenatti, AP photographers Marcio Jose Sanchez, Alex Brandon, David Goldman, Julio Cortez, John Minchillo, Frank Franklin II, Ringo H.W. Chiu, Evan Vucci, Mike Stewart and Noah Berger. There was a special citation for Darnella Frazier who filmed the death of George Floyd.

*****

Conan’s last TBS guests were Martin Short, Jack Black, Bill Hader, Mila Kunis, Dana Carvey, Patton Oswalt and JB Smoove. There were some surprises. The big musical number never happened when Jack Black hurt himself. It was all funny and sweet but Conan never mentioned the band in the last show WTF????????????????????????????????????????? Music is so important to him and he does not thank the band? ** Colbert and Brian Stack gave Conan a cute send after4, 368 shows on CBS calling him a ‘Slenderman Ron Weasly’. Kimmel wished Conn well also.** Hope his HBO MAX variety show goes well.** BTW, the Duvall interview with Colbert was great to see but why does nobody ever mention ‘Get Low?’ What a performance!!

*****

Tattoos are on the rise.

*****

Fast food drive thru’s sometime close with fake excuses like the equipment is down or something because they don’t feel like working. Good people can’t find work and so many waste the opportunities they have. AAAAGHH!!

*****

Valerie Bertinelli and Demi Lovato will star in ‘Hungry’ on NBC.

*****

Hulu will bring us David E. Kelley’s Nine Perfect Strangers with Nicole Kidman, Michael Shannon, Regina Hall, Bobby Cannavale and Melissa McCarthy.

*****

R.I.P. Gavin Macleod, Frank Bonner, Joy Vogelsang, Benigno Aquino, Champ Biden, victims of the Miami building collapse, Robert Sacchi, Stuart Damon, Johnny Solinger and Clarence Williams III.

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zo2paintedlady · 4 years

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LGBTQ+ Novels/Memoirs

Here is the book list from my LIS 618 class. The links will bring you to their Goodreads pages.

The 57 Bus by Dashka Slater (2017) *based on a true story* "One teenager in a skirt. One teenager with a lighter. One moment that changes both of their lives forever. If it weren't for the 57 bus, Sasha and Richard never would have met. Both were high school students from Oakland, California, one of the most diverse cities in the country, but they inhabited different worlds. Sasha, a white teen, lived in the middle-class foothills and attended a small private school. Richard, a black teen, lived in the crime-plagued flatlands and attended a large public one. Each day, their paths overlapped for a mere eight minutes. But one afternoon on the bus ride home from school, a single reckless act left Sasha severely burned, and Richard charged with two hate crimes and facing life imprisonment. The case garnered international attention, thrusting both teenagers into the spotlight."

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Saenz (2012) "Aristotle is an angry teen with a brother in prison. Dante is a know-it-all who has an unusual way of looking at the world. When the two meet at the swimming pool, they seem to have nothing in common. But as the loners start spending time together, they discover that they share a special friendship--the kind that changes lives and lasts a lifetime. And it is through this friendship that Ari and Dante will learn the most important truths about themselves and the kind of people they want to be."

The Art of Being Normal by Lisa Williamson (2016) "Two boys. Two secrets. David Piper has always been an outsider. His parents think he’s gay. The school bully thinks he’s a freak. Only his two best friends know the real truth – David wants to be a girl. On the first day at his new school Leo Denton has one goal – to be invisible. Attracting the attention of the most beautiful girl in year eleven is definitely not part of that plan. When Leo stands up for David in a fight, an unlikely friendship forms. But things are about to get messy. Because at Eden Park School secrets have a funny habit of not staying secret for long…"

Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender (2020) "Felix Love has never been in love—and, yes, he’s painfully aware of the irony. He desperately wants to know what it’s like and why it seems so easy for everyone but him to find someone. What’s worse is that, even though he is proud of his identity, Felix also secretly fears that he’s one marginalization too many—Black, queer, and transgender—to ever get his own happily-ever-after. When an anonymous student begins sending him transphobic messages—after publicly posting Felix’s deadname alongside images of him before he transitioned—Felix comes up with a plan for revenge. What he didn’t count on: his catfish scenario landing him in a quasi–love triangle...."

Gender Queer by Maia Kobabe (2019) "In 2014, Maia Kobabe, who uses e/em/eir pronouns, thought that a comic of reading statistics would be the last autobiographical comic e would ever write. At the time, it was the only thing e felt comfortable with strangers knowing about em. Now, Gender Queer is here. Maia's intensely cathartic autobiography charts eir journey of self-identity, which includes the mortification and confusion of adolescent crushes, grappling with how to come out to family and society, bonding with friends over erotic gay fanfiction, and facing the trauma of pap smears. Started as a way to explain to eir family what it means to be nonbinary and asexual, Gender Queer is more than a personal story: it is a useful and touching guide on gender identity--what it means and how to think about it--for advocates, friends, and humans everywhere."

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver (2019) "When Ben De Backer comes out to their parents as nonbinary, they're thrown out of their house and forced to move in with their estranged older sister, Hannah, and her husband, Thomas, whom Ben has never even met. Struggling with an anxiety disorder compounded by their parents' rejection, they come out only to Hannah, Thomas, and their therapist and try to keep a low profile in a new school. But Ben's attempts to survive the last half of senior year unnoticed are thwarted when Nathan Allan, a funny and charismatic student, decides to take Ben under his wing. As Ben and Nathan's friendship grows, their feelings for each other begin to change, and what started as a disastrous turn of events looks like it might just be a chance to start a happier new life."

Little & Lion by Brandy Colbert (2017) "When Suzette comes home to Los Angeles from her boarding school in New England, she isn't sure if she'll ever want to go back. L.A. is where her friends and family are (along with her crush, Emil). And her stepbrother, Lionel, who has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, needs her emotional support. But as she settles into her old life, Suzette finds herself falling for someone new...the same girl her brother is in love with. When Lionel's disorder spirals out of control, Suzette is forced to confront her past mistakes and find a way to help her brother before he hurts himself--or worse."

The Music of What Happens by Bill Konigsberg (2019) "IMax: Chill. Sports. Video games. Gay and not a big deal, not to him, not to his mom, not to his buddies. And a secret: An encounter with an older kid that makes it hard to breathe, one that he doesn't want to think about, ever. Jordan: The opposite of chill. Poetry. His "wives" and the Chandler Mall. Never been kissed and searching for Mr. Right, who probably won't like him anyway. And a secret: A spiraling out of control mother, and the knowledge that he's the only one who can keep the family from falling apart. Throw in a rickety, 1980s-era food truck called Coq Au Vinny. Add in prickly pears, cloud eggs, and a murky idea of what's considered locally sourced and organic. Place it all in Mesa, Arizona, in June, where the temp regularly hits 114. And top it off with a touch of undeniable chemistry between utter opposites."

Odd One Out by Nic Stone (2018) "Courtney "Coop" Cooper Dumped. Again. And normally I wouldn't mind. But right now, my best friend and source of solace, Jupiter Sanchez, is ignoring me to text some girl. Rae Evelyn Chin I assumed "new girl" would be synonymous with "pariah," but Jupiter and Courtney make me feel like I'm right where I belong. I also want to kiss him. And her. Which is . . . perplexing. Jupiter Charity-Sanchez The only thing worse than losing the girl you love to a boy is losing her to your boy. That means losing him, too. I have to make a move. . . . One story. Three sides. No easy answers."

Ramona Blue by Julie Murphy (2017) "'Ramona was only five years old when Hurricane Katrina changed her life forever. Since then, it’s been Ramona and her family against the world. Standing over six feet tall with unmistakable blue hair, Ramona is sure of three things: she likes girls, she’s fiercely devoted to her family, and she knows she’s destined for something bigger than the trailer she calls home in Eulogy, Mississippi. But juggling multiple jobs, her flaky mom, and her well-meaning but ineffectual dad forces her to be the adult of the family. Now, with her sister, Hattie, pregnant, responsibility weighs more heavily than ever."

Rethinking Normal by Katie Rain Hill (2014) "Have you ever worried that you'd never be able to live up to your parents' expectations? Have you ever imagined that life would be better if you were just invisible? Have you ever thought you would do anything--anything--to make the teasing stop? Katie Hill had and it nearly tore her apart. Katie never felt comfortable in her own skin. She realized very young that a serious mistake had been made; she was a girl who had been born in the body of a boy. Suffocating under her peers' bullying and the mounting pressure to be "normal," Katie tried to take her life at the age of eight years old. After several other failed attempts, she finally understood that "Katie"--the girl trapped within her--was determined to live."

They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera (2017) "On September 5, a little after midnight, Death-Cast calls Mateo Torrez and Rufus Emeterio to give them some bad news: They’re going to die today. Mateo and Rufus are total strangers, but, for different reasons, they’re both looking to make a new friend on their End Day. The good news: There’s an app for that. It’s called the Last Friend, and through it, Rufus and Mateo are about to meet up for one last great adventure—to live a lifetime in a single day."

Two Boys Kissing by David Levithan (2013) "New York Times bestselling author David Levithan tells the based-on-true-events story of Harry and Craig, two 17-year-olds who are about to take part in a 32-hour marathon of kissing to set a new Guinness World Record—all of which is narrated by a Greek Chorus of the generation of gay men lost to AIDS. While the two increasingly dehydrated and sleep-deprived boys are locking lips, they become a focal point in the lives of other teen boys dealing with languishing long-term relationships, coming out, navigating gender identity, and falling deeper into the digital rabbit hole of gay hookup sites—all while the kissing former couple tries to figure out their own feelings for each other."

We are the Ants by Shaun David Hutchinson (2016) "Henry Denton has spent years being periodically abducted by aliens. Then the aliens give him an ultimatum: The world will end in 144 days, and all Henry has to do to stop it is push a big red button. Only he isn’t sure he wants to. After all, life hasn’t been great for Henry. His mom is a struggling waitress held together by a thin layer of cigarette smoke. His brother is a jobless dropout who just knocked someone up. His grandmother is slowly losing herself to Alzheimer’s. And Henry is still dealing with the grief of his boyfriend’s suicide last year. Wiping the slate clean sounds like a pretty good choice to him. But Henry is a scientist first, and facing the question thoroughly and logically, he begins to look for pros and cons: in the bully who is his perpetual one-night stand, in the best friend who betrayed him, in the brilliant and mysterious boy who walked into the wrong class. Weighing the pain and the joy that surrounds him, Henry is left with the ultimate choice: push the button and save the planet and everyone on it…or let the world—and his pain—be destroyed forever."

You Should See Me in a Crown by Leah Johnson (2020) "Liz Lighty has always believed she's too black, too poor, too awkward to shine in her small, rich, prom-obsessed midwestern town. But it's okay -- Liz has a plan that will get her out of Campbell, Indiana, forever: attend the uber-elite Pennington College, play in their world-famous orchestra, and become a doctor. But when the financial aid she was counting on unexpectedly falls through, Liz's plans come crashing down . . . until she's reminded of her school's scholarship for prom king and queen. There's nothing Liz wants to do less than endure a gauntlet of social media trolls, catty competitors, and humiliating public events, but despite her devastating fear of the spotlight she's willing to do whatever it takes to get to Pennington. The only thing that makes it halfway bearable is the new girl in school, Mack. She's smart, funny, and just as much of an outsider as Liz. But Mack is also in the running for queen. Will falling for the competition keep Liz from her dreams . . . or make them come true?"

#lgbtq+ literature #lgbtq+ books for adolescents #lgbtq+#book list #lgbtq+ book list #novels/memoirs #ya books #lgbtq

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joetatoeheads · 5 years

Note

Would you think of doing one with Jeff and reader being in a d/s relationship, but generally dating?? Like not just smut but their love ? 💋💋♥️

Word Count: 1.8K

Warnings: Some D/s mentions,

Masterlist

Some couples did a 24/7 Dom/sub relationship. Others did it for a weekend. Jeff and Y/N were somewhere in the middle. Their relationship was unique from the very beginning. They first met through Matt who was helping Y/N move from Texas. Matt and Y/N tried to be a thing but it failed miserably and the pair found themselves better as friends.

Then Jeff thought she was funny and pretty. Once he started to hang out with her the feelings started soon after. The dating started soon after and when they were cuddled on the couch Jeff accidentally pulled her hair when he was running his finger through her hair and Y/N let out this moan. At first, Jeff didn’t make much of it but when he decided to try it again, she let out the same little moan.

In the middle of sex one day, Jeff grabbed the ends of her hair and pulled slightly. It was then both realize that Y/N had much to explore. The couple played around more before deciding a Dom/sub relationship was something they wanted. It wouldn’t be every day, all day or just a weekend thing, it was a bedroom thing. While Y/N already had a submissive personality, she had moments where she refused to be a submissive especially in regards to Jeff’s safety.

There weren’t many nights of difficult scenes but Jeff provided much aftercare no matter the situation. Whenever Y/N was tied, Jeff would take off handcuffs or restraints and come with lotion to massage her wrists and ankles. If there was a spreader involved than Jeff gave extra attention. The nights of spankings either for punishment or pleasure, Jeff spent almost an hour massaging and kissing the bruised or red bottom of Y/N.

Jeff cared for his little submissive more than anything in the world. He cared for her as much as he cared for his family and for Jeff, saying that was a big deal. If Jeff had taken on a sadist persona and degraded his sub during sex he often worried about Y/N dropping deep into subspace. So Jeff would let her come down from her high and wrap her in a blanket just to hold her and tell her that she was the most beautiful woman in the world and an amazing submissive. It worked and Jeff was pleased with himself.

There were few times that Y/N had disappointed Jeff and their bedrooms activities spilled into their real life. When Y/N forgot to call Jeff sir multiple times as she orgasmed one night, Jeff made her wear a pair of panties with a vibrator in them. He would turn it on whenever the two were around their friends in public. Her cheeks would get rosy, her breathe would become uneven, and she would curl her hands into a fist as she got ready to orgasm. But it never came, Jeff refused to let her cum for a week after that as her punishment.

Another time, Jeff left to New York for a couple of days and found out that Y/N had used a vibrator to get herself off knowing Jeff would only be gone a few days. Her punishment wasn’t a sexual one, instead, she wasn’t allowed to talk to anyone for a whole day. As a social person and a good friend to the rest of the vlog squad, that punishment proved more mental than anything. They had all gone to Vegas for one of David’s spur of the moment vlogs for content and Y/N remained silence the whole time. It was humiliating and unsetting that despite everyone talking and having fun around her, she couldn’t enjoy it as well.

But Jeff had always been a giving type. While his aftercare was many times calm, there were other times it was euphoric. After hours of orgasm denial, Jeff’s aftercare was eating out Y/N for hours after that. She had lost count of the orgasms and by the time things were ending she was overly sensitive so Jeff added over simulation to the list of things Y/N would do for him. She would whine and push away his head hoping that she wouldn’t feel the wonderful pain building up in her stomach. But when she pushed him away, Jeff would grab her hips and hold her against the bed as she screamed his name.

Dom’s received aftercare too. When Jeff’s would spend so much time eating her pussy, Y/N would kiss and massage his jaw after that. She would tell him how amazing it felt to feel his cock in her or hear him call her his little cum slut. The whole point of being in a Dom/sub relationship for Jeff and Y/N was to show each other how much they valued and loved each other.

Their relationship was still for the most part normal. They enjoyed double dates with Heath and Mariah; they hung out with the same group of amazing people. Jeff and Y/N would go out on dates and Jeff would make it his mission to give her a plastic rose for every date they had. The rose was a classic but the idea to choose a plastic one, was so that Y/N could collect them all. The first time anyone had seen them was one when Carly, Erin, Mariah, Suzy, and Corinna were helping her choose an outfit for their two-year anniversary.

“I was thinking red because Jeff loves me in red but then I was thinking maybe white- “

“What is this?!” asked Corinna.

“Oh my god!” yelled Carly and Erin almost simultaneously.

“What? What’s wrong?”

“Your room is covered in rose!” yelled Corinna.

“Why do you have so many fake roses?” asked Suzy.

“Jeff.”

“Okay that is not a full explanation,” argued Erin.

“Why does he give you fake roses?”

“Every rose is a date or something special. He wanted me to sort of collect them,” answered Y/N.

“There has to be hundreds!” Corinna was confused but also excited.

“310 actually.”

“Those cannot be all dates.”

“Most of them yeah. Although I think like one-third of them are just sex stuff,” laughed Y/N.

“Okay now that sounds about right. I always knew you two were kinky,” joked Corinna.

It didn’t take long for everyone to find out what type of boyfriend Jeff was. Joe would make jokes about it, David loved teasing him about it in the vlogs, and Todd and Matt would use it as a defense anytime Jeff was obnoxious to them. The girls would defend Jeff finding him a good boyfriend for Y/N.

David, Zane, and Matt not knowing much about their bedroom activities accidentally walked in on them having sex in the living room. It called for a very awkward conversation explaining a Dom/sub relationship and how they could not tease Y/N about it. Of course, the one day she chose to have morning sex in the kitchen, the guys would walk in on them with her back on the counter and her legs up in the air as Jeff pounded into her. It was just her luck, but also on the fault of them having a really close relationship with the entire group.

David and Matt were traumatized about the whole situation. David was innocent compared to Jeff in those matters and Matt found it awkward since he and Y/N almost dated. Part of being with Jeff was also sort of being with everyone else in the group. Of course once Jonah heard about it incident he couldn’t help but make disgusting jokes that Jeff almost punched him in the face.

“Y/N?”

“Hmm?”

“Are you asleep?”

“Nope.”

“I heard you snoring.”

“I don’t snore,” argued Y/N as she buried her face into Jeff’s neck.

“You’re sleeping on me again.”

“I just want to be with you.”

“Aftercare?” asked Jeff.

“A little.”

Sometimes Y/N reaction to scenes came days after. Depending on what they did, Y/N would cuddle Jeff for hours after having sex then hop in the shower together or she would wait a few days and be clingy. She wouldn’t let Jeff leave the bed too long or she would always have to be holding his hand in public. Y/N made any excuse to hug Jeff and sit on his lap more than normal because she wanted to feel his touch.

Around friends, Jeff’s hand would sneak underneath her sweater or t-shirt and rub her back so she would stay seated or calm. When Jeff was unsure or anxious Y/N would place her hand on his right thigh to stop him from taping his foot at the most random times. It was more than a relationship or a partnership, what Y/N and Jeff had was more unique than that. To enter a Dom/sub relationship in the first part was a huge deal. Many argue that a sub has more power in the relationship than the Dom was, in Jeff and Y/N’s case they weren’t wrong. Jeff took pleasure out of giving Y/N pleasure and it worked for them.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to make a pizza.”

“That dough is… different,” smiled Jeff.

“Well I didn’t say it was going to look pretty.”

“Sweetheart, anything you make is pretty.”

“Sure but I’m not making you one.”

“What? Why?”

“I’m trying a vegan diet so this pizza is vegan.”

“You? Vegan? It’s the tenth time you’re doing this.”

“Actually, seventh and I think I can do it this time.”

“You hate vegan food. You always end up cranky because you can’t have dairy and you want kisses all the time.”

“I do not!”

“Whenever you can cranky you like to sit on my lap and make me kiss your neck,” explained Jeff.

“I do not make you do anything!”

“Neck kisses are the only thing that makes you less cranky.”

“That’s not true. I also like you sucking my tits,” laughed Y/N.

“And that usually ends with my face between your thighs.”

“I don’t see a problem with that,” smiled Y/N.

They both loved the teasing. It made up a majority of their relationship. Jeff would whisper dirty things in Y/N’s ear hoping to make her desperate and whiny. So when they got home, to Jeff’s place, she would be begging from him. Y/N would tease Jeff with the little hand movements and a shy smile.

“I’m tired.”

“After that shit you pulled at the restaurant? You’re tired?”

“Yeah. I’m sorry.”

“Do you want to cuddle?”

“No.”

“No?” asked Jeff a bit hurt.

“I’m just annoyed now.”

“Do you think you’re getting sick?”

“Probably? I don’t know what’s wrong.”

“I’m going to make you some tea. Go put on some sweats or something.”

Jeff made Y/N’s favorite tea was green tea so Jeff made it a point to stock up on the little packets to make her comfortable. While she was cuddled on their bed Jeff set everything down and made sure she was comfortable.

#jeff wittek fanfiction #jeff wittek imagine #jeff wittek x reader #vlog squad imagine

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dreaminginthedeepsouth · 4 years

Link

* * * *

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

January 2, 2021

Heather Cox Richardson

A study by Duncan J. Watts and David M. Rothschild in the Columbia Journalism Review noted that in the 2016 election season there were 65,000 sentences in the media about Clinton’s email use but only 40,000 about all of Trump’s scandals combined. There were twice as many sentences about Clinton’s emails than about her policies. The authors wrote, "in just six days, the New York Times ran as many cover stories about Hillary Clinton’s emails as they did about all policy issues combined in the 69 days leading up to the election.” The email scandal likely cost Clinton the 2016 election, and even now, after the State Department cleared her of wrongdoing, many Americans still think Clinton mishandled classified information in her emails.

Trump tried the same tactic in 2020. Smearing an opponent through investigations was at the heart of the Ukraine scandal of 2019. Trump pressured new Ukraine president Volodymyr Zelensky, not to start an investigation of Hunter Biden and the company on whose board he had sat, but rather simply to announce that he was starting an investigation. An announcement would be enough to get picked up by the American news media so that story after story would convince voters that Hunter Biden and, by extension, his father, were involved in corruption, even without evidence.

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

HEATHER COX RICHARDSON

#Letters From An American #Heather Cox Richardson #political #sedition #election 2020 #trump republican #corrupt GOP #criminal GOP

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shenanigans-and-imagines · 5 years

Text

Old Habits

Peter Vincent x Reader, Angst, Comfort

AO3 Link/ Support Me on Ko-fi

Trigger Warning: Mentions of past abusive relationship

Summary: You are trying to rebuild your life in Las Vegas working for the infamous Peter Vincent, but the past has trouble letting go.

A/N: I have no idea why I wrote this aside from I needed to. I’ve been a slut for David Tennant since 2009 and back on my bullshit, what can I say? PLEASE COMMENT AND REBLOG IF YOU LIKE THIS!!!

Word Count: 3.3K

You told yourself you would never go back to Las Vegas.

It was a long decaying playground in the middle of nowhere that should had died along with the seventies. But, it was home. And when everything in your life falls apart, what else can you do but go home?

You had needed to get out of New York. Too many terrible memories and mistakes haunted every corner of the city. You need familiar territory, someplace to ground yourself in the here and now. Luckily, you still had friends you could rely on.

Jane Brewster was the first person you called when you had finally decided to leave. She practically demanded you stay at her place until you had one of your own. Charley was off at college and wouldn’t be back until winter break. You talked her down, and with respect to your pride, she conceded a motel room would be best for the time being. That didn’t stop her from reaching out to a friend about getting you a job.

You were certain the story of how Real Estate Agent, Jane Brewster and Occultist Magic Performer, Peter Vincent became friends was a long and interesting one. The fact you could never get a straight answer from either of them as to how it happened, however, told you otherwise.

He was a little prickly about your employment at first; but, once you showed him a resume the length of his arm detailing the performers you had been either personal assistant to or represented, on and off Broadway, he started changed his tune.

�� Peter Vincent was, complicated, to say the least. On the one hand, he was a dick. One could say it was just because he was a perfectionist, but that was being generous. Fright Night wasn’t exactly the Royal Shakespeare company, and he had a tendency to snap at other performers and make-up people alike when he was even slightly irritated. At the same time, he had his own unique charm, an indefinable manic energy that couldn’t help but draw you in. Pair that with his more flamboyant tendencies, and he could be downright entertaining. It left you in a constant state not knowing whether you wanted to laugh or smack him.

He seemed to understand your predicament and made it his mission to leave you even more confused than before.

You wouldn’t go so far as to say you were friends. You never hung out after work, or disclosed anything too personal, but there was a comfortable familiarity to your interactions. You could call him an asshole and know he wouldn’t take it personally, while he could call you an uptight know it all, with the assurance that all you’d do is give him a light-hearted eyeroll. In short you liked him. And slowly, the idea of Las Vegas truly becoming your home once more didn’t seem so terrible. But, like so many things in your life, the good things could never last.

You were standing in Peter’s apartment when it happened. Another show had ended, and you were going over upcoming appearances at various occult conventions.

“No, no, no, please I’m begging you. I am literally begging you, don’t tell me they put me on a panel with that prick,” Peter complained, pouring himself a drink.

You shrugged. “You can’t deny Chriss Angel is one of the few magicians people can actually name.”

“But I’m not a magician,” he defended. “I’m an occultist, there’s a difference.”

“You put on a goth-tastic special effects show wearing guy-liner and skin tight leather pants, name me a difference that counts.”

He looked like he wanted to argue, but settled on making an exaggerated grimace before taking a sip from his drink.

“Besides that, I already RSVPed for you,” you continued. “Rest assured there will be a cabinet of alcohol in your hotel room you when you’re done.”

“I know I should be insulted, but that really does make up for it.”

Your lip involuntarily twisted upward at his sardonic response. “And auditions. Maggie is going off on maternity leave soon. I’ve already sorted through head-shots and just need your approval on who to call back.”

You handed him a small pile of photos. He took it, making a cursory glance at each of them without bothering to look at the resumes on the back before he tossed them into two piles.

“Yes. No,” he said pointing to the left and right piles respectively.

“Okay, just remember to be there Thursday.”

He let out a long groan. “Can’t you just do that?”

“You’re the one who has to work with them.”

“Sure, but I trust you to know which ones are idiots and which ones are actually going to hit their marks.”

You rolled your eyes. “If that was really all you cared about, you’d just have me do it.”

“You could,” he said, sounding oddly okay with the idea.

“I don’t think I can pull off a pho-leather corset,” you replied, sardonically.

He didn’t say anything, taking a moment to look you up and down before tilting his head to the side in thought. “Well…”

You pressed your lip into a thin line and raised an eyebrow. Immediately his eyes widened as he attempted to back track.

“You’re right, you can’t.”

You crossed your arms, your expression making it very clear you were not impressed.

“Not that you couldn’t if you wanted to,” he floundered. “It’s just it would perhaps be inappropriate for you to…” He stopped, as a realization dawned on him. “You’re taking the piss, aren’t you?”

You broke as a wide smile spread across your face. “Only a little.”

“Right.” He straightened up, trying to scrape together at least some dignity. “Let’s just erase the last minute of conversation.”

“Already deleted,” you assured.

He smiled in thanks, but before either of you could say something clever, your phone rang. You didn’t bother to check the ID before you answered.

“Y/N speaking.”

“Hello Y/N,” an all too familiar voice answered.

You froze. You could feel the blood drain from your face even as your heart pumped hard against your rib cage. You needed to hang up. You needed to will your limbs to do something other than stand there. Your hand began the process of pulling away from your ear when he spoke again.

“Don’t hang up.” There was no urgency in his tone. Only a casual confidence, as if he were standing in the room with you instead of thousands of miles away. Logically you knew it wasn’t the case but thought of it made you stop. On instinct, you brushed your hand against your throat as if to make sure there was nothing pressed against it but empty air.

“How did you get this number,” you asked, trying desperately to keep your voice calm.

“Believe it or not some of our friends still talk to me,” he replied easily. That was always his trick, wasn’t it? An easy answer to everything. “I just want to talk.”

“I don’t.” Your hands weren’t shaking so badly as before now the initial shock was gone. “Goodbye Eric.”

“Don’t hang up!” he snapped into the line. To your surprise, you didn’t feel the sudden urge to obey. Before you could question why, you hung up.

Immediately your phone began to ring again. You denied the call, clutching your phone tightly in your hand as if that would suddenly make the vibrations disappear.

He had no power over you here, you remined yourself. Your mind was clear. You had control over your limbs and thoughts. There were no hands are teeth pressed against your throat. He couldn’t hurt you.

You were so determined to repeat those thoughts over and over again in your mind, you forgot who else was in the room with you.

“Y/N,” Peter’s voice cut through the fog. “Y/N, what’s wrong?”

You didn’t know what to say. The truth was out of the question. You weren’t certain you knew the truth yourself. But there was no hiding the way you were shaking.

He looked lost for a moment, shifting back and forth, still deciding if it was safe to come near you.

You flinched as your phone began to ring again.

Peter made the first move. In a single stride he crossed the room, pulled the phone away from your death grip, and practically threw it into the closest chair before covering it with a pillow for good measure. The vibrations where now effectively muffled leaving silence in its wake.

He turned to you, keeping his voice as calm as possible. “Y/N.”

You met his gaze.

His eyes were soft and a little unsure. It was an expression you had never seen from him, but you felt just a little better at the sight.

“Who was that?” he asked.

You didn’t want to say his name again as if repeating would somehow summon him. All you could manage of a small, “Ex.”

Peter nodded in understanding. You weren’t sure how much Jane had told him, if anything at all, but you knew he was smart enough to tie your reaction to why you left New York.

“What do you need?”

You needed to throw up. You needed a ticket to a desert island with no chance of him finding you. You needed a death certificate with his name plastered all over it. But at that exact moment you just needed to curl into a ball somewhere private.

“I want to go home,” you said.

“You sure that’s a good idea?”

You nodded.

Peter took a breath, before nodding himself. “Alright, I’ll give you a lift,” he said, swinging on his jacket. “Don’t argue.”

You didn’t have it in you anyway.

The elevator ride down to the parking garage was a silent one, for which you were grateful. You couldn’t really explain how you were still standing up right.

Peter led you to his car, and the pair of you sped off into the night. It wasn’t until you were clear of the strip and well into the desert that he spoke again.

“You sure your ex isn’t in town?”

The questions took you by surprise. You had been preparing for yourself for the inevitable “what did he do”. But, it was obvious the answer didn’t matter to Peter, all that mattered was how what he did affected you. You had never been so relieved in your life.

“I don’t think he would have called me if he was,” you said, having given the matter a great deal of thought. “He’d just show up.”

“So why call you?” Peter asked, confused. “Why not wait until he knows where you are?”

“I think he was hoping I’d just tell him. He’s…” You paused, trying to find a way to describe what Eric could do without sounding completely insane. “He’s got a way of getting people to do exactly what he wants.”

“How?”

You shrugged. All you could really remember was the way Eric’s eyes would penetrate yours before the inevitable fog overwhelmed your senses until you couldn’t tell up from down. Once again, you hand went to your neck. The scars had faded, but the ghost of pain remained.

“He just does,” was all you could say. “I guess it doesn’t work over the phone.”

Peter noticed your motions but made no comment on it. A look crossed his features you couldn’t name, but it left you wondering if he knew something you didn’t.

“Are you going to be alright?” he asked, not allowing you time to dwell on the thought.

You let out a long breath. “I don’t know.”

Eric wasn’t the first. He was simply the latest in a long line of assholes you had allowed to control you. You didn’t know how it happened. Everything started off fine, but sooner or things would start to happen. They’d start screening your calls. Girls nights would be canceled because they claimed you weren’t spending enough time with them. Accusations of cheating would be leveled left and right to make you feel guilty at even talking to anyone else. Then, one night, they’d take it too far and you would run until you found someone else and the whole cycle would begin again. Maybe Eric was the logical end to all this. Someone who could quite literally take complete control. Maybe you had been asking for this.

“Do you ever feel like you’re making the same mistakes over and over and over again?” you said, quietly. “You get yourself in or put yourself in a situation, and every time you know exactly how it’s going to end, but you go through the same motions every time and it never stops; because for some sick reason you don’t want it to stop. Because there’s…I don’t know, a comfort in the repetition.”

“You’re asking the barely functional alcoholic this?” Peter said.

You laughed. You were surprised you laughed, but matter of fact sarcasm in his voice paired with a reassuring smile gave you permission to do so.

“Well, you ask a stupid question,” you mumbled sardonically.

Peter shook his head. “It’s not a stupid question,” he assured. “I think it’s just something people do. Good or bad, you stick to what you know.”

You didn’t say anything for a moment, allowing the truth of the statement to float in the air a while. This was the longest conversation you could recall having with Peter that didn’t involve you either reminding him of an appointment or ending in some kind of banter. But what was weird was it didn’t feel weird.

Still you felt obligated to say, “I’m sorry I’m laying all this on you.”

“It’s alright,” he assured. He sounded like he meant it too, even as a slightly awkward expression settled on his face. “I’m not sure how to not make this sound bad, but it’s kind of nice to know I’m not the only one with issues.”

You blinked. “You’re right. There is no way to not make that sound bad.”

He winced, his mind clearly working very hard to find a way to back track. Given the circumstances, you decided to show him some mercy.

“But, I know what you’re getting at,” you said, with a half-smile.

You could almost hear his sigh of relief.

“I wouldn’t have guessed it,” he admitted, after a short pause. “You always struck me as someone who would never let anyone tell them what to do.”

“I try to be,” you admitted, as your insides turned over. “But, old habits.”

He didn’t say anything more, and you were grateful. You each had given more away than either of you intended.

Soon enough had pulled up in front of your apartment, but neither of you felt the immediate need to get out of the car.

“Do you need someone here?” he asked. “You know, just in case?”

You shook your head. “I don’t think so. I might call Jane, see if she can come over.”

He nodded, but that awkward expression didn’t leave as he ran a hand through his hair.

“Or, I can stay,” he offered, “if you’d like.”

You stared at him a moment. You imagined inviting him in. You could see him entering your small apartment with the pile of empty cardboard boxes still sitting in the corner of your living room. You imagined sitting down on the couch side by side, the space fading between you until you could rest your head against his shoulder. You imagined those warm brown eyes staring down at you, before you pressed your lips to his and--

You tore you mind away from the thought before it could go any further.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” you said, softly.

A flash of hurt played out behind his eyes before he got the chance to hide it. “Right, yeah.”

“No, that’s not what I—”

“It’s fine.”

“I didn’t mean—”

There was a pause. Neither of you could look at each other, but you also didn’t want it to end the night this way. Why did you always find a way to make things complicated?

“Peter,” you said, taking a long breath, “my life is a complete mess. I’m a complete mess. Bad things just keep happening and I… I don’t want bad things to happen to you. I’m sorry, I—"

“Don’t,” he cut in sharply. “Don’t apologize for something he did.”

You stopped then. There was a conviction in his tone that made you have to stop, even as your heart rate spiked. He seemed to have noticed, and his tone immediately softened.

“Y/N? Please, look at me.”

You did so, and in that moment, you wondered how you never noticed just how wide and open his eyes truly were.

“Look I don’t know if I’m crossing a line, or behind the line, or dancing a jig on top of it, and if I am making you uncomfortable, I’ll hop right back over it again, but I just…”

He stopped running a hand through his hair to get his thoughts in order. “So, you’re a mess, that’s fine because that doesn’t stop you from being a good person. And you are, Y/N, you are a good person. You’re so good. And you deserve…fuck, you deserve only good things to happen to you.”

You could feel your throat tighten. The way his eyes bore into yours reminding you again and again of the sincere place his words were coming from. A surge of emotion flooded your chest until it spilled over into tears on your cheeks.

“Shit,” Peter said, immediately going into a panic. “Shit, shit, shit. Look, what I said, if I—”

“No,” you assured. “No, what you said was perfect.” You tried to get a grip, but the tears continued down your face as your breath shook. “It’s just…you’re really nice.”

Peter stared at you, clearly unsure as to what to do. “I’m not though,” he said.

A sad smile came to your lips. “Yes you are.”

Before you could question your actions, you cupped his cheek, and closed the distance between you, placing a gentle kiss against the other. Your lips landed a hair away from the corner of his mouth, his light stubble feeling oddly comforting against your skin.

He looked like a dear in headlights by the time you pulled away. Neither of you moved, for a moment. You could only take a guess at what he was thinking. For a second you noticed his eyes dart to your lips. You wondered if he would close the gap and kiss you properly this time, but he made no move. You had drawn the line in the sand, and he was going to stay respectfully on the other side. Somehow, that made having to leave even worse.

Without another word, you pulled your hand away and walked out of the car to your apartment.

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Peter stared after you as you walked through the door and well after it closed. He could still feel your hand on his cheek and the warm of your lips against his skin. His heart pounded against his ribs and in his throat, it was making it impossible to think clearly.

He leaned back against his seat trying to calm himself down. You weren’t in a good place right now. Putting aside the general obstacle that you were still his employee; you had just gotten out of an extremely toxic relationship with a man who was either a class A manipulator, or quite possibly, some sort of supernatural creature.

Of course, he couldn’t say that. Not without proof. And he hoped for your sake he wouldn’t get it.

You weren’t in a good place. Anything you said or did tonight didn’t count.

He let out a long breath, repeating the thought like mantra over and over again.

He really had wanted to kiss you just then.

With a frustrated groan he gripped the stirring wheel tightly before mumbling softly, and with feeling, “Fuck.”

#peter vincent #peter vincent x reader #david tennant #david tennant x reader #fright night #fright night (2011)#tw: abusive relationship #tw: past abuse

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starslooklikediamonds · 5 years

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Info On David Harbour’s Hellboy character.

From interviews, there us some random bits of info, directly from the creators & actors of the movie.

You can add to the info, if you got some. Let me know.

Do with it what you want.

“Even though he’s a demon, I have to consider him human. He’s half-human, but I have to consider him psychologically like a human.”

Harbour plans to really examine Hellboy's psyche, particularly his somewhat toxic masculinity. - "I think Hellboy has a certain psycho dynamic, where occasionally he has to prove that he's the lion, has to roar, and I think he struggles with his own masculinity. But I don't think he needs that as much as maybe those other movies. I have a bit of a different take on his capability or his slickness. I sort of think that for me he's a little less skilled at constructing that persona."

In our movie, he’s very much dealing with his own [demons] being ostracized from society. There’s kind of a Frankenstein element to it. There’s a lot more self-hatred. Although those [Del Toro] movies did explore a certain aspect of that, ours is just a lot darker in terms of a character piece, who he is. He’s a much more tortured guy who, in the end, has to do the right thing. He is destined to be the beast of the apocalypse and one of our goals is to justify the temptations of that destiny in terms of the creation of a world where, as a demon, he might be accepted. As a monster he might be accepted, [but] he doesn’t feel [that] in this world.

In our movie Hellboy’s younger. He’s rougher. He’s much more of a teenager. He’s really struggling with the idea of whether or not he’s a good person.

“My interpretation is a little more of that internal turmoil with his relationship to and his place in the world being a little more unstable. And it's maybe a little darker. He's still got this fun thing to him, but underneath it is this scared little boy who really doesn't understand human love and doesn't understand why he's beloved because of his destiny to bring the end of the world.”

“He’s a creature that was meant to bring about the end of the world, and he just sort of wants to be a good guy. He’s got that complexity to him. He’s also a monster who lives among human beings, so he’s in a sense fighting for human beings against his fellow monsters, and yet the humans hate him because they fear him and they think he’s weird looking and everything.”

“On Hopper & Hellboy - “He has a heart that’s really good and with a lot of this crusted-over stuff. What I’m dealing with in Hellboy is a lot different, bigger in a certain way. It’s very Shakespearean. It’s demons and witches and stuff like that. But it has a similar core to a dude who’s trapped in horrible circumstances who’s just trying to be a good guy.”

“David Harbour’s Hellboy is a little bit more dramatic. There’s a different edge, Mignola said. “[Ron Perlman] was very smooth as Hellboy, and there’s a whole different love interest vibe with Ron’s thing. Ron was almost playing this kind of old adolescent. And Harbour plays a grittier Hellboy, and a bit more explosive, emotionally. It’s hard to explain, but it is a very different take. The beauty is, both of them, in their own way, feel like Hellboy. It’s almost like they’re just tipped it in two different directions. There’s something much gnarlier about David’s Hellboy.”

“We met Perlman’s Hellboy at the onset of his career as a paranormal policeman, Harbour’s Hellboy has been around a lot longer, which speaks to why he’s a bit more world-weary and has a lot more attitude. The film is also adopting a key element of the comics where Hellboy is known to the public instead of the B.P.R.D. trying to cover up his existence.”

“In the del Toro films, Hellboy is kind of penned up, and kept secret, and that is not what we have here [in the upcoming film]. This is truer to the comic, in that Hellboy’s been out in the world. He’s not a top-secret, hidden away guy. He’s an out-there-in-the-world, functioning, working adult. So you’ve got that working stiff, been there, done that vibe with Harbour, that you just couldn’t have with Ron because it was played so differently,” Mignola explained, also adding, “[With Harbour’s Hellboy] there’s a little bit more angsty, find-your-place-in-the-world, a frustration with his role.”

“He's spawned into the universe by Nazi occultists to bring about the end of the world. And he is captured by Broom, who decides to raise him. So he's an orphan who was adopted. English isn't his first language, to say the least. He's destined to bring about the apocalypse and he, in his heart, just really wants to be a good guy. He idolizes people he grew up with in comic books, like Lobster Johnson, and he wants to be like a paranormal detective. So he's kind of a silly, sweet creature but also a demon. And he lives in a world where human beings don't accept him for who he is. So even when he winds up saving people, they still show up with pitchforks and torches to try to kill him. I think the biggest struggle for him is he's hunting down monsters, and yet he is one. So what is he doing, exactly? That's a big conflict in him.”

“And he deals with it in certain ways that certainly Hamlet doesn't. He's just very witty. He's got this dry, sort of put-upon humor, but underneath all of that is this desperate conundrum of like, "Where is this going to end? What's the end game for this?"

“He's an adult struggling with adult things. It's not like whether or not I should kill the bad guy by punching him. It's more like, Who's the bad guy?”

“He's the guy who the bad guy will give a huge monologue about — I'm destroying the universe — and Hellboy's like, "You talk pretty tough for a guy with no pants." He's always undercutting the situation and he has these one-liners. The script's really funny. One of the ways he deals with the world is to have this dry humor about it because it's so painful.”

“Hellboy has a lot more issues. He's a little more lost, a little more confused and conflicted. I think that makes for a darker tone in terms of what he's willing to do.”

“Hellboy like he's such a beautiful weird creature, I mean I wanna say guy but he's like a half demon creature and I have a real kind of soft spot in my heart for what he goes through.”

“The whole idea that he's called Hellboy and that struggle with the father that you live in the shadow of this father and you are of this boy and then you want to become this man but the paradoxes of that are all over the movie. I mean one of the great things is like, there's an initial scene where Hellboy is shaving his horns and his dad comes and helps him, shave his horns, while he (Broom) tells him that he's special and that he loves you. You know and there's something about him shaving the uniqueness off of him (Hellboy) and yet calling him unique, that is very interesting to me and in a way he's right because at the end of the film, it's the villain who wants to grow his horns right but in the end of the film, maybe there's something special even beyond the genetics of the horns that is unique to him, that his father does see. But there's paradoxes of identity all through that and like the control that parents have on our identities.”

“Broom is a brit, he’s (Hellboy) raised by Broom, but he talks like a guy from New York. Part of that was that he traveled all over the world. He speaks Spanish, he speaks all these different languages. I talked to a language coach about this, and he was talking about how kids learn dialects from the people that they grow up with. They don’t learn dialects from their parents. So if you have a Spanish mother or something and you grow up in the United States, you speak like an American kid. So part of the thing for me in terms of finding his voice was that he idolized Lobster Johnson. In my mind, even the trench coat plays into this idea of this James Cagney sort of [thing]”

“In terms of being a demon, one of the things he wants to do is fit in. He wants to be like a private eye who goes and solves crimes, and he is the best B.P.R.D. agent. He’s the best paranormal detective the world has ever seen. He takes great pride in his job and he takes great pride in this persona, and that persona is a lot based on his favorite superhero, Lobster Johnson.”

“Lobster Johnson is a big deal to Hellboy. He dresses up like him for Halloween. So that factors into my psychological process.”

“Yeah, he’s terrifying! There’s that question of, why am I fighting this battle? Just because of some sense of justice, or some sense of good? It’s a really interesting question that sort of is at the core of him, that he struggles with.”

“We’re taking the time to deal with that, the fact that Hellboy is a killer. He’s, truly, a weapon. And I think we spent a little more time on that, as well.”

“One of the things I like about him is that he’s a really messy fighter. This is one of the things that I actually talked to Mike about. I talked about his belt that he wears, because he wears this belt that has these patches and I was like, “What’s in those fuckin’ things?” And he’s like, “Well, he’s a paranormal detective, right? So he’s got to show up and fight vampires and witches or whatever. So he’s got like garlic and silver bullets and all kinds of shit.” But he doesn’t really know what he’s doing. So he’ll throw a bunch of garlic on somebody and then he’ll be like, “That didn’t work!” And then he just goes in and eventually he knows that he’ll just have to knock somebody out.”

“In that way, I wanted him to be strong, but I didn’t want him to be a trained MMA guy. He doesn’t have a lot of training as a fighter. He’s just big and strong and scary and almost like a pub brawler. So one of the things about the fights that have been really fun is that he messes up a lot.”

“There's all this misfit stuff working around him.”

“David Harbour - “Hellboy is probably a virgin…”

“I was describing [what] was a creative process around the sexuality of a half-demon. …”

“I feel like genetically, when you’re half-demon, you respond to different things. And I think human beings are confusing to him. They behave confusingly to him in their ways of their hatred of him, and also their love of him. So to me the genetic predisposition of sexuality was very interesting, and how that sexuality plays out. … To me it was more just about the attraction to the supernatural, the genetic attraction to non-simple human female or male.”

“I mean, he is destined to be the beast of the apocalypse. And I think one of our goals is to justify the temptations of that destiny in terms of the creation of a world, where you know, as a demon, he might be accepted, and as a monster, he might be accepted, that he doesn't feel in this world. The other thing that we explore somewhat is -- I mean, one of the interesting things to me about the Guillermo del Toro movies was that he had like a love interest, right? And she was like a fire starter, and but I just think that Hellboy can't have a human being. He probably can't have sex with a human being because it would probably end disastrously, because of his demonic parts or whatever.”

“So I feel like what I wanted to explore was that loneliness, and you know, there's the temptations that you have to, if you do create a darker world as the beast of the apocalypse, you can have sex,” Harbour continued. "You can have a girlfriend. You can live your life. But to live in the human world and to protect humanity, you have to sacrifice some of your nature, and your actual nature, as opposed to this concept of destiny, just that your actual nature somewhat gets sacrificed.”

“David Harbour quoting lines of main character, from the movie Owning Mahowny - “What was the greatest joy, on a scale of 1-10, you felt gambling?” And he said, “10.” And they were like, “What is the greatest joy you ever felt doing anything other than gambling — sex, food, whatever?” And he was like, “2.” And he was like, “So you’ll have to live with it at 2 for the rest of your life.” And he was like, “I’m okay with that.” There’s something about that thematic that I find is somewhat different in terms of Hellboy’s struggle.”

“On Alice - “her and Hellboy they kinda give each other something that says ‘You’re not alone and we can do this.’’

“The great thing about Hellboy and Alice is that it's a love story, but they're not in love. It's a demon...I think Alice teaches him about love because of their connection, but it's very different from a classic romance story.”

“On Alice - “It’s an avuncular relationship. It’s funny because, in an earlier draft, there was the temptation to do that, and I was very adamant to the fact that Hellboy cannot have sex with human women. I don’t want that to ever be an issue, and I want it to be known for him, whereas there is this Blood Queen Witch in the movie, right? So there is a world that he can exist sexually in, but it is not in our human universe. Alice is, even though she has sort of a witchcraft thing to her, she is a human being. He would never.”

#hellboy #hellboy 2019 #david harbour #david harbour hellboy #alice monaghan #sasha lane #hellboy comics #hellboy fic ideas #hellboy fic

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starwarsnonsense · 6 years

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Top 10 Films of 2018 (So Far)

Since I quite like continuing old traditions, I wanted to do a post rounding up what I consider to be the ten best films of 2018 so far. This list includes a few films that came out in 2017 in the US, since they were only released here in the UK this year.

Have you seen any of the films I cover below? Have I piqued your interest in a title you might not have heard before? Let me know, and do share your favourites too!

1. Annihilation, dir. Alex Garland

This was my most anticipated film of the year, and my hype for it was more than rewarded. This is a marvellously rich and transporting science fiction film that isn’t afraid of taking the viewer to some very weird places. However, Annihilation doesn’t simply rely on its strangeness to succeed - it is also firmly rooted in its characters and themes, which has made it incredibly rewarding to return to. Natalie Portman is fantastic as Lena, and Annihilation is a brilliant showcase for her - Lena is a complex and frequently self-destructive character, riddled by guilt and regrets that shape the pulsating, luminescent world of the mysterious ‘Shimmer’ that she has to venture into. The Shimmer might seem like an environmental phenomenon at first, but it’s really more psychological, being a space that adapts according to the people who enter into it. This film overflows with fascinating and thought-provoking ideas, and it was entirely worth the hike I made over to Brooklyn to catch one of the final showings at the theatre (since Annihilation was denied a theatrical release in the UK, I made a point of seeing it while I was on holiday in New York). I think it will go down as one of the great science fiction films, and it belongs in the same conversations as 2001: A Space Odyssey and Solaris.

2. Beast, dir. Michael Pearce

This little British film - shot mostly on location in Jersey by a first-time director - was easily the biggest (and best) surprise I’ve had so far at the cinema this year. I literally had no idea this film existed until a day or so before I watched it, and that made the experience of viewing it even more wonderful. Moll (Jessie Buckley) is an isolated young woman who is stifled by her controlling family and quiet life on a remote island, as well as a secret sin that bubbles away underneath the surface. Her life is predictable - safe, repetitive and dull - until she meets Pascal, a mysterious local man who she finds she has an affinity with. However, there is a murderer haunting the island, taking the lives of young girls in the night. Who’s to blame, and what impact will the killings have on Moll and Pascal’s swiftly escalating romance? While that is a synopsis more than a review, I felt it necessary to explain the premise to try and compel you to seek this one out. Beast is raw, woozy and utterly absorbing - the love story between Moll and Pascal is one of the most passionate and gripping you’ll ever see on screen, and their chemistry is simply sensational. There’s a real gothic, fairy-tale edge to the story which appealed perfectly to my (admittedly rather niche) tastes. This is a real hidden treasure of a film - do yourself a favour and make it your mission to watch it.

3. Lady Bird, dir. Greta Gerwig

This film was so, so relatable, despite my not really having experienced an adolescence anything like “Lady Bird’s”. While the details of her life are very different from mine, I think anyone can relate to the sweeping brushstrokes - the tensions that can arise between parents and children, the thirst for freedom and independence that builds the closer you get to the final days of school, and the feelings of love and loyalty that are always there even when they’re unspoken. Greta Gerwig captures all of this and so much more with marvellous delicacy, balancing little moments that add colour and spark with more serious scenes so deftly that it’s amazing to think that this is her first feature. Lady Bird is a very specific and very beautiful film, and it’s special precisely because it feels universal even as it feels small and personal to its director.

4. Eighth Grade, dir. Bo Burnham

This is the perfect double bill with Lady Bird, and the people who have dubbed this film “Lady Bird Jr” are right on the money. Elsie Fisher has a real star turn as the heroine Kayla, who is a very special child - she’s kind, sensitive and thoughtful, which basically means she’s my kind of superhero. But even as she is a good and sweet person, she is also going through all of the trials you’d expect a 13 year old to be facing in 2018, as she wrestles with acne, confusing feelings about super-dreamy boys, and the escalating anxiety that comes with a comment-free Instagram post. Like Lady Bird, this film succeeds in being both very specific and highly universal - the only social media I had to deal with as a teen were MySpace and Bebo, and I found that seeing Kayla wrestle with a whole kaleidoscope of feeds, devices and platforms made her strong grip on her integrity as a funny and deeply warm-hearted individual all the more remarkable. Bo Burnham, as with Gerwig, made a pretty incredible film here - in particular you should watch out for the father/daughter dynamic, which is my favourite part. Eighth Grade is funny and generous, and the perfect medicine if you’re feeling demoralised by the state of the world right now.

5. The Breadwinner, dir. Nora Twomey

The Breadwinner is a really lovely animated film telling the story of Parvana, a young girl living with her family under the Taliban. When her father is taken off to prison, Parvana sees no other choice but to dress as a boy to provide for her mother and siblings. But how long will her disguise last? The story here was what really gripped me - it’s very simple, in both the telling and the themes, but it is truly beautiful in that simplicity. The emotions are very raw, and this film goes to some shockingly dark places at times - while I think it can be watched with children as long as they are mature enough for some challenging themes and upsetting moments, it’s likely to speak most strongly to adult audiences with a fuller appreciation for the context in which the film is set. It’s a great and moving alternative to more mainstream animated efforts, and is well worth your time.

6. Phantom Thread, dir. Paul Thomas Anderson

This was a delightfully twisted film with an absorbingly complicated and twisty relationship at its centre. Vicky Krieps is an absolute marvel as Alma, and it’s wonderful to see how she battles to bring the fragile and austere designer Reynolds Woodcock (Daniel Day-Lewis) to heel. It’s also a beautiful film with rather fabulous fashions - if you love couture, particularly from the ‘50s, this will be a real treat. I also appreciated the many allusions to classic cinema - there are strong shades of Hitchcock’s Rebecca, as well as the underrated David Lean film The Passionate Friends. Check this out if you like your romantic dramas weird and entirely unpredictable.

7. Revenge, dir. Coralie Fargeat

Revenge is angry, sun-soaked and batshit insane - and it is pretty great for all of those reasons. It follows Jennifer, the teenage mistress of a sleazy married man. After a horrifying assault Jennifer returns, phoenix-like, to wreak her revenge upon her attackers. This movie was very much inspired by exploitation flicks, with their penchant for showing scantily clad (and frequently bloody) women wielding shotguns to hunt down the brutes who did them wrong. However, first-time director Coralie Fargeat takes every one of those tropes and owns them, ramping up the blood and giving the action a propulsive energy that keeps you gripped even as you know exactly where things are going. The soundtrack here is also one to look out for - it’s all pulsating synths that do a great job of building the suspense and tension from the get-go.

8. Lean on Pete, dir. Andrew Haigh

This is a very painful film in many ways, but it’s only painful because it does such a great job of earning your emotional investment. The lead of this film is Charley, a sensitive and quiet teenage boy who becomes attached to an ailing race horse as he seeks to escape his troubled home-life. When he finds himself in crisis, Charley takes the horse and they head off on a journey across the American heartland. Charlie Plummer is extraordinary as the lead here - Charley is the kind of character that makes you want to reach through the screen so you can offer him a hug of reassurance and support. The photography of the American countryside is exquisite, and means this film really deserves to be seen on the big screen - the breadth of the landscape gives all of the emotional drama some (richly deserved, in my view) extra punch.

9. You Were Never Really Here, dir. Lynne Ramsay

This is a very weird film (you’re probably noticing a theme at this point) but it’s completely absorbing. It’s very much actor-led, and the film rests on the shoulders of Joaquin Phoenix’s gripping and unpredictable performance - in some scenes he’s muttering in deference to his mother like a modern-day Norman Bates, while in others he’s portrayed almost as a lost boy in an overgrown body, disorientated by his environment and engaging in acts of extreme violence as if in a sort of trance. The narrative is fuzzy and unfocused, but I didn’t find that mattered much since I was too busy following every evolution of Phoenix’s face.

10. Thoroughbreds, dir. Cory Finley

Olivia Cooke and Anya Taylor-Joy make fantastic foils to one another as two appallingly privileged teenagers whose obscene wealth is only matched by their resounding lack of morals. This is a film that plays with your loyalties, trying to wrong-foot you at every turn - it’s frequently difficult to figure out what’s genuine here, and while that did sometimes leave me feeling a bit emotionally detached that’s usually the point. This film is more of an intellectual puzzle than a lean, mean, emotion-extracting machine (see: Lean on Pete), and it succeeds brilliantly on that level. The simplicity of the story means the fun lies in picking apart lines and expressions, so go in prepared for some close viewing.

#annihilation #films #cinema #movies #list #movie recs #beast #lady bird #lean on pete #the breadwinner #phantom thread #Eighth Grade #you were never really here #thoroughbreds

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vvvveta · 3 years

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WHO LOST AFGHANISTAN?

IN THE IMMEDIATE aftermath of 9/11, Americans were braying for war. A CNN/USA Today/Gallup poll found that 90 percent of Americans approved of the United States attacking Afghanistan, while 65 percent of the public was comfortable with the prospect of Afghan civilians being killed. Only 22 percent thought that the war would last more than two years.

Americans wanted blood, and they got it. The United States invaded Afghanistan and spent the next 20 years making war there and beyond: in Burkina Faso; Cameroon; Iraq; Libya; Niger; the Philippines; Somalia; Syria; Tunisia; and Yemen, among other places. More than 770,000 people have since died violent deaths in America’s wars and interventions, including more than 312,000 civilians, according to Brown University’s Costs of War Project.

Of the 10 percent of Americans who thought that war was not the answer, a small number demonstrated against the impending conflict. They marched in Austin, Texas; New York City; San Francisco; Washington, D.C.; and elsewhere. It took courage to speak out against “indiscriminate retribution,” to assert that it was ludicrous to attack a country for a crime carried out by a small group of terrorists, and to suggest that the repercussions might echo for decades. They were mocked, screamed at, called scum and traitors, and worse.

Those who got it right in September 2001 have long since been forgotten. The White House, the Pentagon, and the media never sought the dissenters out for advice, comment, or counsel as the war in Afghanistan went off the rails, ending with the chaotic collapse of the U.S.-backed Afghan government on Sunday. Instead, those who got it wrong have consistently held sway in the halls of power. “This did unfold more quickly than we had anticipated,” President Joe Biden, who voted for military action in 2001, admitted yesterday. “[Former Afghan President Ashraf] Ghani insisted the Afghan forces would fight, but obviously he was wrong.” Ghani was hardly alone. Biden and countless other Americans played key roles in a 20-year road to defeat that began with the United States toppling the Taliban from power in 2001 and ended with the Taliban installing themselves in the presidential palace in Afghanistan’s capital, Kabul, this week.

Journalist Craig Whitlock’s new book, “The Afghanistan Papers: A Secret History of the War,” will help ensure that no one forgets the harm America’s civilian and military leaders did, the lies they told, and the war they lost.

Synthesizing more than 1,000 interviews and 10,000 pages of documents, Whitlock provides a stunning study of failure and mendacity, an irrefutable account of the U.S.’s ignoble defeat in the words of those who — from the battlefield to NATO headquarters in Kabul and from the Pentagon to the White House — got it so wrong for so long, papered their failures over with falsehoods, and sought to avoid even an ounce of accountability.

“People often ask me, ‘How long will this last?’” President George W. Bush said on October 11, 2001, a few days after the United States started bombing Afghanistan. “This particular battlefront will last as long as it takes to bring Al Qaeda to justice. It may happen tomorrow, it may happen a month from now, it may take a year or two. But we will prevail.”

More than a decade later, the U.S. still hadn’t won the war, and an obscure government agency, the Special Inspector General for Afghanistan Reconstruction, or SIGAR, sought to figure out why. The result was more than 400 “Lessons Learned” interviews conducted with mostly American (but also Afghan and NATO) officials as well as other experts, aid workers, and consultants. Their assessments were candid, often damning, and the government sought to keep them under wraps.

But the indefatigable Whitlock and his employer, the Washington Post, via two Freedom of Information Act lawsuits, forced the government to turn over the files. These records became the foundation of an award-winning series for the Post; now, combined with several troves of documents from various public collections, these files make “The Afghanistan Papers” the most comprehensive American accounting of the conflict and help explain, better than any book yet, why so many of those who planned, guided, and fought the war failed so spectacularly.

Deftly assembling accounts thematically and chronologically, Whitlock allows America’s war managers to hang themselves with their own quotes, offering an encyclopedic catalogue of lies and ineptitude, delusion and denial, incompetence and corruption, and, most of all, rank cowardice. Again and again, Whitlock presents the pessimistic assessments and harsh judgments of officials who believed that their remarks would never become public — war makers who could have spoken out publicly but too often kept their appraisals under wraps or voiced them when it was too late to matter.

“We didn’t have the foggiest notion of what we were undertaking,” recalled Army Lt. Gen. Douglas Lute, the White House war czar under Presidents George W. Bush and Barack Obama.

“We did not know what we were doing,” said Richard Boucher, the Bush administration’s top diplomat for South and Central Asia.

“There was a tremendous … dysfunctionality in unity of command inside of Afghanistan, inside the military,” recalled Army Lt. Gen. David Barno, an early Afghanistan War commander.

“There was no campaign plan,” confessed Army Gen. Dan McNeill, who twice served as the top commander in Afghanistan under Bush. “I tried to get someone to define for me what winning meant, even before I went over, and nobody could.”

These and hundreds of other officials, military officers, diplomats, and analysts could have leveled with the American people immediately or at any time in the last 20 years. Had they done so, perhaps the war in Afghanistan could have been shortened by a decade or more; perhaps following conflicts wouldn’t have been so easy to start or proved so difficult to end; perhaps more than 770,000 people wouldn’t be dead and up to 59 million forced from their homes by America’s post-9/11 wars.

Instead, Americans muddled through the conflict in Afghanistan, unsure what they were there to accomplish, why they were doing it, who they were fighting, and what they were fighting for. “What were we actually doing in that country?” asked a U.S. official who served with the NATO senior civilian representative to Afghanistan. “We went in after 9/11 to defeat Al Qaeda in Afghanistan, but the mission became blurred.”

To call it confusion is the kindest possible assessment. Another is that, as Whitlock writes, the government was peddling pablum “so unwarranted and baseless that their statements amounted to a disinformation campaign.”

WHITLOCK DOES A masterful job of mining the hard-won SIGAR synopses and archived interviews to juxtapose private judgments with public comments. Bush’s first secretary of defense, Donald Rumsfeld, recently died of multiple myeloma, but Whitlock ably demonstrates that shame ought to have taken him years earlier. Of all the craven war managers who take their star turn in “The Afghanistan Papers,” Rumsfeld may come off worst. “I have no visibility into who the bad guys are,” the late defense secretary wrote in an internal memo almost two years into the war. “We are woefully deficient in human intelligence.”

Rumsfeld never shared his pessimism with the American public. Instead, for years, he took the press to task for pushback while publicly crowing about signs of progress and corners turned. In 2003, Rumsfeld announced that the Taliban was finished. “To the extent that they assemble in anything more than ones and twos … they’ll be killed or captured,” he boasted. If there’s any justice, Rumsfeld is currently being grilled in the afterlife about whether it’s one or two Taliban fighters who are now overrunning cities and districts across Afghanistan.

So much in “The Afghanistan Papers” reads like an unsettling echo of the American war in Vietnam. During that conflict, the South Vietnamese military that was built, trained, armed, and funded by Americans was regularly (and not always unfairly) disparaged for its cowardice and incompetence. In the end, U.S. officials couldn’t understand how a 1 million-person army with billions of dollars’ worth of American weapons and equipment collapsed in 1975. In “The Afghanistan Papers,” Americans similarly disparage the Afghan military they built or make excuses for its weakness and ineptitude. How could the U.S. be at fault when its Afghan charges couldn’t read, write, or identify colors; mistook urinals for drinking fountains; couldn’t learn basic tactics or manage to shoot straight; and were both lazy and corrupt? Left unexamined is just why a rag-tag, under-armed, underfunded insurgency drawn from the same population, without an air force or superpower backing, was able to exist, much less make consistent progress, over 20 years, ending with a blitzkrieg that took one major city after another, including Kabul, in a matter of days.

Opium is another key overlap. During the Vietnam War, as heroin use among U.S. troops soared, Air America, a company run by the CIA, transported opium harvested by farmers in Laos who were also serving as soldiers in the agency’s secret army. Following its defeat in Southeast Asia, the United States sought to entangle the Soviet Union in its own “Vietnam” in Afghanistan, where, as the New York Times reported, “opium production flourished … with the involvement of some of the mujahedeen, rebels who were supported by the Central Intelligence Agency.” By the time Americans were fighting against some of those same mujahideen and their sons in the 2000s, the United States had turned against drug production and devoted billions to eradicating poppies, but Afghanistan nonetheless became the world’s top narco-state.

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winterbaby89 · 7 years

Text

I’m Falling For You

Summary: All it takes is one text to make Killian’s world stop… one text from his best friend since college to simultaneously break his heart and breathe new life into him, effectively turning his world on its head.

Killian is Emma’s rock. The one person she knows that will be there for her time and again. When the break up from hell, and residual fallout, puts her best friend, once again, in the role of caregiver and comforter, Emma can no longer deny the feelings that have been brewing within her ever since college.

Can the magic - and questionable mixture of alcohol and pain meds - during the holiday season finally force the confessions they’ve both been suppressing for years?

Rated M

A/N: This fic was inspired by the song of the same name, by Chester See. If you haven’t listened to it, I recommend it.

I want to thank and give all the love to the lovely ladies that helped me get this fic finished, be it by beta-ing, cheerleading, or being the second set of eyes that I don’t seem to possess… So, THANK-YOU @hollyethecurious, @ilovemesomekillianjones, and @kmomof4.

**Special thank you to @hollyethecurious for creating the fantastic aesthetic to go with the fic for my birthday week reblogs.**

Line break indicates change in scene or POV.

Also on AO3 and FF

All it takes is one text to make Killian’s world stop… one text from his best friend to simultaneously break his heart and breathe new life into him, effectively turning his world on its head.

Emma : I need you. Walsh and I broke up. Can you come get me? I’m at Mass General.

Killian : I’m on my way love, are you alright?

Emma : I will be.

“Hey Li, I have to go. I’ll call you later, yeah?” Killian’s slight panic must bleed into his voice because Liam’s response on the other side of the line is his concerned papa bear tone.

“Everything okay Kil?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, but Emma’s just sent me a text from the hospital, I’m heading there now.”

“Oh! Okay, well I’ll talk to you later little brother. Go take care of your girl.” Liam promptly hangs up, not giving Killian a chance to correct him.

“Younger. And she’s not mine, no matter how much I might wish it,” he mutters anyway, to no one in particular.

The whole drive to the hospital he is on autopilot, his thoughts lost in a swirl of memories.

Northeastern University four years ago:

Killian was glad to be back on campus after his summer in New York, as much as he loved Liam, his older brother could be a bit much, plus being back meant he’d get to see Emma again. All last year he tried to deny what he felt for her, but as the saying goes, absence makes the heart grow fonder , and fonder was putting it lightly when discussing how head over heels in love he was with his best friend. Killian was planning to tell her just that, as soon as he could make it to her dorm, after dropping off his stuff in his own.

Knocking excitedly on Emma’s door, Killian was confused when a half naked guy answered the door instead of his Emma.

“I’m sorry. I guess I have the wrong room, I’m looking for Emma Swan.”

“No you got the right room buddy, but she’s kinda busy,” the shirtless guy all but sneered at him with an unimpressed look on his face.

“Oh!” Embarrassment colored his voice as he turned to leave, tossing out, “Sorry to have bothered you. Can you have Emma text me when she’s unoccupied?”

“Sure thing… who are you?” Killian could hear the condescension oozing from every word the guy says.

“Killian?”

At the sound of Emma calling his name, Killian turned back around. Based on the look Mr. Rude and Pretentious was wearing, he could tell that the guy wasn’t expecting Emma to come to the door, and he wasn’t too thrilled she was calling out his name either. Emma continued on, oblivious to the tension, “Hey. There you are. Where are you going?” As he looked at his best friend, Killian noticed her look of confusion.

“I was informed you were busy, so I was going to leave you to it.” Killian’s tone was curt and clipped, trying not to let his heartbreak show, which only caused Emma’s confusion to deepen.

“Busy? No, Neal was just helping me get unpacked. Why don’t you come in.”

Killian could see plain as day on Neal’s face, that he didn’t want another man around. “Emma, I don’t think-”

“Oh! I’m sorry. You two haven’t met before, have you? Killian, this is Neal. Neal this is my best friend Killian.”

That day was the beginning of the hopelessly tortured road to the end for him. He’d had to watch from the sidelines as Emma dated Neal (controlling, cheating arse ), then Graham ( poor sod was hopelessly in love with their friend Ruby ), then August ( guy found himself a great boyfriend in the hatter’s son ), and up until tonight it would seem, Walsh. Walsh had lasted the longest of the four.

They didn’t all end badly, but over the course of four years Killian stood by and watched as each time she would excitedly enter into these relationships, completely unaware of the effect it had on him. When things did go bad, he’d be there to help her pick up the pieces and rebuild, leaving her a little more guarded and her walls a little higher than before. When it went bad, it was bad , and Neal, the bastard, was bad enough for a lifetime.

Little did Killian know that Neal would have nothing on Walsh…

Two Hours Earlier:

Walsh really outdid himself tonight, Emma muses. He’s made a reservation for them at Mama Maria’s for their eight month anniversary. Although Emma suspects this evening to also be his last ditch effort to convince her to go with him to his family’s estate in Connecticut to spend Christmas. He’s been trying to persuade her since before Thanksgiving, after she’d told him she would be spending that particular holiday with her brother, some friends, and their families. Killian’s brother had come into town with his wife Elsa, and they’d all shared a nice intimate holiday with old friends at David and Mary Margaret’s. Since then Walsh has been insisting they spend Christmas with his family, since she’d had Thanksgiving with hers, but she has been steadfastly refusing.

Dinner is a tense affair despite being a celebration, because Walsh keeps going on about the things they must see, or do while they are in Connecticut. Emma’s had enough, and is trying not to snap at Walsh about how she is absolutely not going home with him for Christmas. She’s impatient to get home to a large glass of wine, her favorite pj’s, and the Princess Bride. Maybe I’ll text Killian to see if he wants to join me after his weekly call to Liam, she ponders.

When the server comes around inquiring about dessert, Emma tries to politely pass, but Walsh is insistent that she try the tiramisu because apparently it’s the talk of Boston. Emma sighs agitatedly, acquiescing to the tiramisu.

When the server brings the plate around, Walsh grabs her hand and squeezes as her eyes land on the ring neatly set into the ganache.

“Walsh…” Emma trails off as her brain attempts to grasp what her eyes are seeing.

Walsh must take her stunned expression as a good sign, as he begins his pre-composed speech. “Emma, I know most people wouldn’t consider eight months a very long time, but I believe we know each other well enough. I see no point in wasting any more time. So, marry me, become Mrs. Walsh Osmond.”

“Walsh. I’m sorry. But… no.”

“What do you mean, no?”

“I can’t marry you. I didn’t realize you felt this way, but I thought you knew, I’m not ready for marriage, I’m sorry.” Emma pulls her hand free of Walsh’s grasp, then standing from her seat, she pulls on her coat and heads for the door.

Walsh comes bursting through the door just moments after her looking incensed. “How could you do that to me Emma? Do you realize how much of a fool you just made me look? All of those strangers staring at me with pity. We will be getting married, and you will come with me to Connecticut for Christmas, so we can celebrate our engagement with my family.”

“Walsh, I am not some Stepford Wife , at your beck and call, to carry out your every whim. We are not getting married, and I am not going to Connecticut. I mean, we’ve been fighting about Christmas for the last several weeks. In all that time, what made you think I was going to change my mind and decide to go with you?”

“I knew you’d change your mind once we were engaged. My family is expecting us to come together, they’re already planning an engagement party for us that weekend, at the country club.”

“YOU TOLD THEM?! Why did you tell them before you even asked me?”

“Because I knew it was a sure thing.”

“A sure thing?! A SURE THING?! Well, buddy, you got that wrong… now you have to go home with your tail tucked between your legs, and explain to your family how you misled them. Because like I said inside, I’m not marrying you. We are through.”

“Don’t be like that Emma. You know we’ll have a large wedding in the spring, in Connecticut-”

“NO! Just stop right there. Walsh I have told you no, numerous times, we are not getting married, I am not following you to Connecticut. WE. ARE. THROUGH. You are deranged, and I have no idea what I ever saw in you.” Emma turns away from Walsh, planning to put this boy and this night in the rearview. The next thing she knows there is a burning sensation in her shoulder as Walsh jerks her back to him by the crook of her arm.

“Get back here. We are not done.”

Emma struggles against his hold, intensifying the pain in her shoulder. “Let go of me, you lunatic-” Her next words are cut off as Walsh’s fist connects with her face. Thankfully, Walsh lets go of her arm as she falls back from the force of the blow. She stumbles backward until she hits an antique light post, she tries to protect her shoulder from the impact. “You bastard,” she grits out as an intense burning sensation blossoms around her eye.

“Emma, it didn’t have to be like this.” Walsh approaches, fists clenching, looking like he’s going to continue his physical tirade.

Before he has the chance to swing again, Emma thrusts her good elbow upward and catches Walsh’s nose. She knows she has hit her mark when blood starts gushing like Niagara, causing him to stumble back clutching his broken nose.

Moments later the cops and paramedics arrive on the scene, alerted to the situation by concerned patrons watching the scene from inside the restaurant.

Killian arrives at the hospital having worked himself up into a worried frenzy, but he’s trying to contain himself, for Emma. He parks in the first spot he sees, barely managing to turn the car off before running into the ER to find her.

He is directed through the security doors, toward the nurses station, where he can get more information. As he comes around the corner, he spies David at the end of the hall. As soon as David sees Killian headed towards him, he moves to meet him halfway.

“How is she mate, is she okay? What the bloody hell happened?”

David puts an arm around Killian’s shoulders, with a wary look on his face. “Here, come with me. She’s been treated for a fractured orbital socket, and they had to reset her dislocated shoulder. She’ll be okay. But it’s probably best you hear the whole story from her.” David leads him along the hallway to Emma’s room.

Killian wonders why David came to the hospital, but isn’t in the room with his sister. Probably on duty and can’t stay too long, Killian thinks.

Opening the door he walks into her room; seeing his best friend on the hospital bed looking beaten to hell shatters his heart. Emma has massive bruising around her left eye, a sling protecting her right arm, and is sitting cross legged on the bed with an IV in her right hand. Looking at Emma the rest of the world fades away, and Killian doesn’t even notice as David shuts the door to allow them some privacy.

“Love. What happened?” Killian asks quietly as he makes his way to her side.

“Don’t worry Killian, I’m fine, promise.” She tries to give him a reassuring smile, but he is not fooled.

“Fine?! Darling, you’re always fine. But there is nothing fine about this situation.” He tries for levity, to curb his distress at her current situation. He does not want to tax her any more than she already is.

“If you think this is bad, you should see the other guy.” Emma gives him a cheeky grin as she banters back.

“Guy?! What guy? I thought you were in an accident.” As the words leave his mouth he sees the smile slip from Emma’s face as she looks down at her lap.

Without looking up, Emma says, “I’ll tell you everything that happened, but you have to promise me you won’t overreact.”

The weight of her tone leads him to sit at the end of the bed. As she continues to avoid his concerned gaze, Killian reaches out to gently grasp her free hand reassuringly. “Alright Swan, tell me.”

She tells him the whole sordid affair, from the tense dinner, to the proposal, to the brawl in the street. Never once does she look up from their joined hands. He sits in stunned silence, processing everything he’s just been told. The quiet in the room is broken by the nurse coming in with all of Emma’s discharge paperwork, and prescriptions.

“We would like to give you a dose of something stronger to help with the pain, so you can get some sleep tonight. Will there be someone with you?”

Without looking away from Emma, Killian responds before she can say a word, “Aye. She’ll be staying with me tonight.” When Emma looks like she is going to protest, he speaks up a little louder, “Please don’t fight me on this Swan, take the medicine, so you can sleep tonight.”

“If you’d like sir, bring your car around to the entrance, and we’ll wheel her out in a few minutes.”

Killian nods and leaves the room to retrieve his car, while walking down the hall he sees David is still there. Realizing that he is in the exact same spot as before the reason why David wasn’t with Emma hits Killian.

“Son of a bitch!” Killian curses, knowing that David has Walsh in custody. “Bastard is still here.” Killian storms down the hall with a murderous intent for Walsh.

“David, mate.”

“Killian?”

“The bastard is in there isn’t he?”

“Don’t even think about it Killian.”

“Oh, I’ll do more than think about it. Go get a coffee, give me five minutes alone with him.”

“Emma has already pressed charges, we’ll handle Walsh. Right now Emma needs you, and you’ll be no good to her if I have to arrest you, too.”

“Then don’t arrest me.”

“Not gonna happen Jones. Go take care of Emma. If it’s any consolation, she shattered his nose.”

As he is about to retort that it’s still not good enough, he hears Emma’s concerned voice call his name. Deciding the low life isn’t worth it, Killian gives David a nod, then turns on his heel to go catch up to the nurse pushing Emma towards the exit.

The nurse wheels Emma out, and waits on the sidewalk with her as Killian quickly brings his car around. Pulling up right in front of them, Killian puts the car in park, and moves out and around to help Emma get up. By the time he makes it to her side she is half asleep, thanks to the meds, but still cognizant enough to slap his hand away as he tries to help her get up out of the wheelchair. Emma makes it to her feet, but doesn’t even get a step towards the car before she’s falling sideways into Killian’s chest.

“Easy there Swan.”

“I’mng good. Mmm-got it. G’off me.”

Realizing exactly how high she is right now, Killian can’t suppress the chuckle that rumbles up from the depths of his belly. “Whatever you say Swan. As graceful as your namesake you are. Up you go, let’s get you in the car.”

After getting Emma in the passenger seat, Killian has to reach across her to get her buckled in, because she’s already half asleep, again . Whatever they gave her didn’t take long, and I’m glad, she needs her rest after tonight , Killian muses. He has to take it slow on the drive home to avoid throwing Emma’s injured shoulder into the door as he’s taking corners.

Finally making it to their apartment building, Killian has to carry Emma up the two flights of stairs to their floor. Maneuvering around her dead weight to unlock the door, Killian finally gets the two of them inside his apartment. Traversing the familiar terrain easily, Killian safely makes it to his bedroom, depositing Emma on the bed as gently as he can manage. As he is getting her tucked in under the covers, Emma burrows her nose into his pillow and inhales deeply. Killian freezes as she mumbles on a breathy exhale, “Mmmm, smells so good, just like Killian.” His heart stutters in his chest at her not quite declaration, thinking that maybe there is hope for him after all.

Two Weeks Later:

Curled up in her corner of the couch, legs tucked up under her, nursing her now lukewarm cup of cocoa, Emma is lost in her thoughts. She recalls her moment of panic less than a week ago, when she realized that she and Killian had been successfully cohabitating in his apartment. Domestic, and perfect, and just not in the cards for her, because she’s in love with her best friend, and he will never see her as anything more. She had to run, she had to protect herself, because if she had stayed at Killian’s another day, she would have ended up doing something to fuck it all up. She couldn’t lose Killian, so before he could push her away, she ran; to protect herself, and her battered heart.

The only reason she’s nursing a mug of cocoa instead of something a little stronger is because she had agitated and inflamed her shoulder. She’d tried to do too much, too soon, just to prove she could, which landed her with another round of pain meds and a stern talking to from her brother, sister-in-law, doctor, Killian, and even Liam (via Skype).

Of course it had been Killian to find her crying on her bathroom floor, unable to put her arm through the sleeve of her robe, because of the intense searing pain. The faint flush of his cheeks when he found her like that had to have been from the residual heat of the shower she’d just left. Always a believer in good form, and gentlemanly behavior, he hadn’t even tried to sneak a peek under her robe as he helped her get her arm into the sleeve.

Since the day she re-injured herself, Killian had been crashing on her couch every night. He’d make his excuses to not have to leave, and supply her with all manner of coffee, food, and treats. He made sure she had breakfast and dinner daily, and ensured she took her pills before he’d leave to get ready for work. She loved the attention and doting, and the more fanciful part of her brain kept insinuating that it meant more. But she couldn’t listen to that voice, that part was an idiot, and couldn’t be trusted anymore. Emma couldn’t let herself hope; hope was a dangerous thing for someone like her.

Emma is brought out of her musings and self-chastisement by Killian ringing the doorbell. She opens the door to reveal the man of her dreams, also the man who torments her dreams; his hands are full of take out from their, her, favorite Chinese place around the corner. She gladly lets him into her apartment, helping him juggle all of the take out containers.

As he goes to retrieve the silverware and drinks, Emma queues up Princess Bride for them to watch as they eat.

After they’re done eating, Emma finds herself more focused on Killian than her favorite movie, noticing the small things more than she’s ever thought to. There’s nothing new about his arm slung across the back of the couch, his hand absentmindedly playing with one of her curls. Everything appears to be the same, normal even, but her thoughts from earlier, and what could be, keep coming back to the surface, making her inspect and scrutinize everything for deeper meaning.

She’s startled out of another such musing when Killian turns to look at her with a pensive look on his face, she hadn’t even realized the movie had ended.

“Everything alright Swan? You seem to be somewhere else tonight.”

“Yeah. Sorry. I’m fine, just tired I guess. Everything okay with you?”

“I’m fine Swan. Wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. Or with anyone else.” Killian gives her a sweet smile, the smile she recognizes as her smile, before a slightly anxious look passes across his features, “Actually, there is something I need to talk to you about.”

“I find whenever a guy says that, I’m rarely in for a pleasant conversation.”

Smothering his chuckle, Killian sobers once more, “Nothing bad, I promise. I just wanted to let you know that I’m not going to be able to bring you dinner tomorrow, you’ll have to fend for yourself. I am finalizing those contracts that I’ve been working on with that big client tomorrow, and then it’s expected that I take her to dinner afterwards.”

“Big client? You mean Tink? From Pixie Dust Development? The handsy one?”

“Handsy? What are you talking about, Swan? But, yeah, if I land this contract, it will put Jones Bros Designs in the black for years to come.”

“You know what, nevermind. I hope that the deal works out well for your company. Come on, it’s late, and you have to get up for work in the morning, we should really get to bed.”

“Absolutely, love. Your bed or mine?” he teases. His over the top flirtatiousness usually draws a laugh, or at the very least a good natured eye roll, but her traitorous thoughts from earlier choose that moment to come back to the forefront, making her wonder, what if? When she doesn’t respond with anything but a tense silence, Killian asks, “Are you sure you’re okay Swan?”

“What? Oh… yeah sorry, like I said, just tired.” Emma vacates the couch so Killian can lay down, since the man refuses to sleep in his apartment lately. She hurries off down the hallway to her room, listening to Killian settle onto her couch for the night. She also hears his tossed out reminder to take her pain pills just before she shuts the bedroom door behind her.

Emma has a fantastic boss, and her dream job, but unfortunately because of her bastard ex she is on administrative leave through Christmas. She can’t properly do her job until she is fully healed.

Most people would think that being a social worker would be a less than desirable job, but for Emma it is her way to give back to the kids like her. Orphans. As soon as Christmas is over, because of all the foster families that wait until the holiday has passed to send the kids back, she knows that she will be busier than ever, which just isn’t right.

So she really should enjoy the quiet that she’s got now, but she can’t stop herself from thinking about Killian alone with Tink. Every scenario she comes up with is worse than the last. Finally, unable to stand the thoughts any longer, she goes in search of that half full bottle of rum that she knows is hiding in her kitchen somewhere. Prescription warning labels be damned.

The bottle of rum, now empty, sits on her coffee table. Emma can’t keep herself from wondering if Killian had accompanied Tink home. With a set purpose, she gets up from her couch on wobbly legs, and makes her way back to her room. She is a woman on a drunken mission.

Killian is glad to finally be home, excited, elated even, at having secured a massive multi-million dollar contract for his and Liam’s architecture firm. Tink had been a little more aggressive than anticipated, after she’d had a few drinks at dinner. Luckily they had all of the paperwork signed and completed before they had gone out; she had looked a bit perturbed when he’d rebuffed her advances.

Kicking his front door closed behind him, Killian contemplates making his way over to check on Emma after taking his shower. Weighing his options, he realizes that it might be nice to actually sleep in his bed for the first time since she got hurt. As he is contemplating that luxury, Killian makes it through his bedroom door, stopping dead in his tracks at the sight before him. Emma Swan. Naked. Passed out, on my bed. Naked. I’d recognize the drunk hicca-snore anywhere. Naked. Why is she naked, in my bed? This is my bed, aye? Doubting that he’s actually come into his own apartment, since he’s so used to being in hers lately, Killian goes back out into the hall to double check the number printed on his door. It is.

Making his way back inside the apartment, and ensuring the door is secured behind him, Killian makes his way to the linen closet to get a blanket for Emma. He knows he won’t be getting any answers tonight as Emma sleeps solidly through his attempts to cover her completely. He affords her the softest and warmest comforter he owns, so as to ensure that her supple backside won’t be subjected to the cool night air; and to protect her modesty should she turn over at some point while she sleeps.

Having resigned himself to another night on the couch, at least it’s comfortable, Killian proceeds with his plan of taking a shower, and if he should have the need to relieve some tension that had stirred to life at the sight of Emma’s delectable assets, none need be the wiser.

She wakes to the sunlight streaming onto her face, wondering, why in sam hell is my blackout curtain not working? Starting to take inventory of herself and her surroundings, Emma comes to several conclusions rather quickly. Oh shit! This isn’t my bed. Why am I naked? Damn my head hurts like a son of a bitch, what the hell happened last night?

As she thinks back to the night before, she tries to mentally retrace her steps. Emma remembers having worked herself up into such a state of agitation thinking about Killian and Tink together, that she drank every last drop of rum left in the bottle. The last memory she has is getting up off of her couch with determination. What the hell was I so determined to do? Everything after that is fuzzy.

How did I get to Killian’s apartment? The key, that’s right, he gave me his spare key… Taking stock of her current lack of clothing, surely I must have taken them off before getting in his bed, right? Looking around the room, there are no clothes scattered on the floor. I didn’t? I wouldn’t. Did I really walk across the hall naked and break in to my best friend’s apartment, and pass out on his bed? Was he home? How much of me did he see? How did he react? Fuck! How awkward is this going to be? Deciding there is nothing for it, she gets out of his bed to face the music, before he comes to confront her.

Making sure the coast is clear, Emma gets up and dashes for Killian’s closet to find something to cover herself with. Picking her favorite hoodie of his and a really soft pair of boxers, she heads out in search of Killian, only to find him in the kitchen. His back is to her as he works at the stove, making what smells like… pancakes? He’s making me pancakes?

“So wanna tell me why you were passed out in my bed, love?” He turns his head just enough so she can see that damnable quirked brow of his, “Not that I’m complaining about coming home to a beautiful woman in my bed… I’d thought Christmas had come early.”

“Yeah… sorry about that… I was upset,” Emma mumbles as she avoids Killian’s gaze, afraid of what she might find.

“Upset? What were you upset about?” Killian sounds genuinely concerned, but she still refuses to look at him.

“Nothing, I was just upset, and got drunk, and I think it reacted funny with my medication.”

“Swan. You know you’re not supposed to drink with your medication.”

“Nevermind, you know what, just forget about it. I’ll just leave you alone. Sorry for bothering you.” As she turns to leave, she feels Killian’s hand gently wrap around her uninjured elbow, turning her to face him.

“Emma, love, stop. What is going on?”

Well hell! Way to ruin things Emma, way to ruin everything, like always. He knows something is up, he actually is quite perceptive. Honestly this may be my last chance to say something, I may have already lost him, and I can’t let him go, without at least telling him.

Emma brings her panic filled eyes to meet Killian’s concerned gaze as she solidifies her resolve. Now or never Emma , “I’m in love with you. That’s what, and I don’t know how to deal with it, along with the fact that you don’t see me as anything more than a friend.” Her voice starts out strong, but as she reaches the end, it is quiet as a whisper, and cracking as she struggles to contain her turbulent emotions.

“Now where did you get an idea like that?”

“Like what?”

“That I don’t see you as anything more than a friend.”

“You’ve never said anything.”

“When would I have had the chance? The timing was never right.”

“Oh.”

“Emma, I have loved you for so long, I can’t remember what it’s like not to love you. So, to clear up any possible confusion. Emma Swan, I love you.”

In lieu of a response to his declaration, Emma is on him. Her lips are sealed to his in a passionate kiss that he’d never even let himself dare to hope for. Apparently, she was going for action rather than words, but she had already said those five fateful words, and he’d thought his heart was going to burst when she had.

If we’re going the route of action then . He picks her up and though she startles to the point of exclaiming his name in an octave higher than normal, her legs wrap around his hips of their own volition.

“Do you realize how mad you drove me?” he murmured against her lips, not wanting to pull away any further than that, now that he’s been granted the pleasure of her kiss. Killian is relying fully on muscle memory to guide them back down the hall to his bedroom. “Seeing you naked on my bed, unable to touch you. And this morning, seeing you in nothing but my clothing, a man can only take so much temptation.” He presses the evidence of her torments against her as he pins her against his bedroom door.

“You’re not the only one that’s been tempted Jones.” Emma veritably moans as he grinds against her again.

“What say you, to us re-examining your outfit from last night?”

“But I wasn’t wearing anything last night.”

“Exactly.” With Emma’s giggle, Killian finishes the trek to his bed. As things are ramping up, kisses more heated, touches roaming over every expanse, a disheartening realization comes to him. “Swan, wait… wait, wait. I don’t have any condoms. I wasn’t expecting-”

“It’s ok Killian… I’m covered. I’m clean, and protected .”

“Aye?”

Emma nods bashfully at his enquiry.

“I’m clean as well, so if you’re still willing.”

“Yes, I’m willing, now get a move on Jones. I’m tired of waiting.” At the vehemence in Emma’s voice, Killian leans up off of her to remove his shirt. He notes the look on her face as his shirt clears his head, and soars across the room.

“See something you like, love?” he asks with a smirk playing on his lips. It takes her a moment to peel her eyes away from his toned chest to meet his gaze.

“Yeah.” Her voice is much breathier than normal, which causes his smirk to widen.

He helps divest her of his hoodie, and is unable to stay his thoughts “You are an absolute vision my love.” One of his new favorite things has to be the blush that creeps across Emma’s chest and face at his words of praise.

With a roll of her eyes, she deflects by saying, “Whatever you say, Romeo.”

Willing to let it be, and get back to the more urgent matter at hand, Killian gives her another kiss before pulling back, and nudging her hips so he can help her shimmy out of his boxers. When she’s completely bare he leans back up and showers Emma in kisses. He starts with her pouting lips, then works his way down her jaw, and all along the length of her neck, intent on showering every inch of her body with his affection.

“Killian-”

He can’t help but smile at the way Emma whines out his name in frustration.

Pausing his trail of kisses long enough to look up into her emerald eyes, with pupils blown wide, he asks, “Yes, my love?”

“You are still far too overdressed.”

“All in good time my love, I plan on taking my time, and taking care of you the way you deserve. I’ve been dreaming about this for far too long to rush any of it. Ladies first, then I will take you; I promise.”

“W-Wait… you’ve dreamt of this?”

Killian chuckles wickedly. “Of course I have. You are quite entrancing.”

Killian rests his chin just above her delectable quim, glancing up, he catches her eye. He wants to make sure she is alright with this, not wanting to cross a line, and risk pushing her too far too fast; the thought of pushing her away is unbearable. When Emma smiles reassuringly, he closes the distance, licking a line with the flat of his tongue from slit to clit, eliciting a moan from both of them.

“My love, you taste divine, I’ll never get enough of you,” he murmurs into her core, not wanting to stop for even a second.

Emma wiggles and jumps with the sensations of his attentions causing him to place his left hand across her belly to keep her still. Alternating between long licks, penetrating her with his tongue, and sucking on her bundle of nerves, he’s quickly driving her to the edge of pleasure. As she gets closer he uses his mouth to focus his ardor on her clit while guiding his fingers in and out of her to work her to completion.

Emma comes with a cry of his name on her lips, and he swears he’s never heard a sweeter sound.

“Still with me love?”

She hums out a pleasured sound of affirmation as he hops back off of the bed and shucks his pants. Killian then lies down beside her, playing with her hair, until she opens her eyes to look at him.

Bringing himself above her, once she has recovered, Killian’s right hand trails down her side from her pert breast to her hip, anchoring himself to her there. He slowly runs his silken steel shaft through her drenched folds, savoring the wetness as he coats himself in her essence. After teasing the both of them a few moments more he delicately pushes his throbbing cock into her tight sheath inch by delicious inch until he is completely buried in her to the hilt. Pausing to give them both a moment to adjust, he leans forward to capture her lips in a kiss to trump all kisses. He keeps his pace steady, trying not to thrust too hard, wanting to make it memorable for both of them.

Feeling his release building quicker than he’d like, he reaches down to caress her clit and whispers to her, “Come again for me Emma, I want you to come with me.” As he circles her clit faster, he feels the enticing flutter of her walls signaling her orgasm.

“Killian. Right there. I’m … I’m … OH GOD!’’

“Let go Emma, I’ll catch you. Come for me.’’ Watching as Emma falls so beautifully over the edge, he lets her take him with her. Killian murmurs her name lovingly as he spills his release inside her.

“That’s it love, that’s it.’’ He relaxes above her, momentarily forgetting he is putting all of his weight on her. Regaining his senses, he rolls off of her and pulls her to her side so they can lie facing each other to catch their breaths.

“I hope I’ve not worn you out, love. I am nowhere near finished with you yet,” he growls into her ear.

They both lose track of the hours, too wrapped up in the feel of one another to care, they spend the rest of the day in Killian’s bed.

Waking from, probably the best sleep she’s ever experienced, laying snuggled into a still sleeping Killian, Emma thinks back on the perfect and pleasurable day before. Emma finds herself wanting Killian, again .

She takes advantage of his slumber to peruse every facet of his beautiful body. Her hand starts at his cheek before skimming along his chiseled jawline. She moves to his neck, and leans down to place a gentle kiss in the hollow of his throat, then continues with both hands now, to smooth along his toned chest. She loves his thatch of chest hair as it rubs against her palms, and even more when it grazes her hardened nipples.

He truly is a work of art, and she wonders if he’d be upset if she tasted him. She’s wanted to take him with her mouth since she’d seen him bobbing hard and proud against his stomach. Deciding she is going to treat him, Emma delicately shimmies her body down his, so as not to wake him before she wants him to.

Once she is level with his already hardened member, she licks her lips in anticipation; gently taking his generous length in hand, she extends her tongue to lick a stripe from base to tip. Killian shifts in his sleep at this, but does not wake, emboldened by her desire she opens her mouth to take him in fully. Unable to stifle the moan that crawls up her throat at the sensation of him in her mouth, Emma begins to steadily bob up and down along his length. She feels the ache in her core and knows she is wet, but this is about Killian, and his pleasure, not hers.

By the time Killian starts to stir from the sensations she’s lavishing on him, she can feel the wetness pooling and dripping down her thighs. The sound Killian makes is a mix between a moan and grunt. His hand reaches out reflexively tangling in her hair as she continues to work him over with her mouth. Voice still heavy with sleep, Killian finally speaks up, “Emma…” His voice trails off as another moan escapes his throat, and he gives a slight tug on the hair in his grip. “Love stop, or this will all be over too quickly. I’ve no wish to leave you unsatisfied.” At that Emma picks up her pace, intending to make him fall apart for her, just as she had fallen for him the day before. Any further protestations from Killian are staved off by another moan torn from his throat as he begins to spill himself down her throat. Emma tastes his release and swallows down every last drop before releasing him with a soft pop. She grins up at his sated smile like the cat that ate the canary.

After a few moments of quiet, with nothing but Killian’s labored breathing to be heard, Emma shimmies back to her place, snuggled into his side. “Well. Swan, wow. Christmas really did come early. But have no doubt, I will get you back for that.”

“I look forward to it. Best Christmas ever.” Emma hums out as she snuggles into Killian’s chest.

~ Fin ~

Walsh’s POV

Tagging some lovelies that have asked to be tagged, as well as some I believe might enjoy. Please let me know if you do, or don’t wish to be tagged. Happy reading.

@artistic-writer @captain-swan-coffee @flipperbrain @gingerchangeling @ilovemesomekillianjones @jennjenn615 @kmomof4 @laschatzi @seriouslyhooked @smutqueen27 @teamhook @ultraluckycatnd @xhookswenchx @yayimallamaagain

#cs ff #cs ff au #cs smut #cs fanfic #cs fan fic #cs fanfiction #captain swan #captain swan fic #captain swan fan fiction #captain swan au #captain swan fanfiction #winterbaby89writes

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theproofinthisong · 7 years

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paris 2018

now that i recollected myself (it’s a lie but still) i wanted to describe my experience at harry’s concert, since it’s the first time i ever saw him live <3

- first all the people attending were SUPER cool. the first girls i saw when i arrived was a group of gals wearing rainbow flags and holding a “free hugs sign”. i never do this usually but i went to see them & i hug them lol. what i love most about harry is the way he wants everyone, absolutely everyone, to feel loved and recognized. i wanted to honor him by celebrating it, in any way i could. that’s also why i complimented everyone who crossed my path there, telling a girl she had a pretty makeup, another one that i love her flag or another one (a foreigner) that her french was amazing. treat people with kindness is a simple sentence, but it’s one to live by. it was so pleasant to see these people light up when i told them positive things. it doesn’t cost anything and it really makes people happy.

- i’m usually a shy individual. but a harry’s concert is such a safe, accepting place that i wasn’t afraid to go out there and talk to people. i asked people if they were coming by themselves, i tried to talk with other fans, even groups. the girl that was next to me was SUPER SWEET, like it was one hour before the concert’s start and i was planning to keep myself busy with my phone. but the girl arrived and she wasn’t accompanied so we talked and it was so!! easy!! that was so great. that hour felt like two seconds. we talked about many different things and it was like i had a instant friend. she was italian and we spoke english the whole time, praising our beloved boy, and without this concert i would have NEVER met her, it was amazing to share experiences with a stranger. 40 minutes later, another girl (french this time) sat next to us and she was alone too. this was so funny because we were trying to switch to french to english as fast as we could so the other girl could understand us, it wasn’t easy but we had such a good time. we took selfies together, fangirled together, like our squad was formed in two minutes. we lose our minds together, screamed together, hold hands when we were strangers one hour before. that’s the harry effect! <3 while on the ride home, i talked to another girl which stopped at the same station as me, and she was so lovely too. it was as if the concert continued, in a way. i’ll never forget that.

- the first girls i saw were also larries. fate knows they’re my people

- when i arrived into the arena one girl was already crying and i mean? mood

- the crowd was on fire. i was so proud of us. we didn’t disappoint. everyone was screaming the lyrics at the top of their lungs, having fun, being emotional and cheering non stop. you could feel the enthusiasm, the happiness. and the best part about it? harry saw that. he was smiling ALL the time, cracking up laughs and lovely expressions. you could see he was touched. he was also throwing kisses to us a LOT (everytime he waved to my side, i DIED and the people next to me too) said we were incredible, that he was going to miss us and that’s...too overwhelming i’m speechless. i think it was the first big arena of the tour and i’m so glad we were able to show him how loved he was.

- the projects were so well planned. like the girls organizing the whole thing were super dedicated and awesome. they handed signs to us (the you bring me home one) and were so efficient. my favorite project was the rainbow one (i cried when i saw the colors while harry was singing sott) but the sc and ftdt’s ones were also magnificent. it was so special to hear him sing the latter in silence in such a huge arena. except from some dumbasses who were screaming (miss manson that’s for you) the whole crowd really wanted harry to have his moment. it was brilliant to see everyone shouting “shhh” everytime someone was trying to yell lmao.

- it was so cute for him to speak so much french. that made me feel so happy. that was so personalized, so adorable. and i think everyone died after he went mad over the pamplemousse thing. i can’t stop rewatching that part.

- the part where he’s holding the rubix’ cube and playing with it seemed to last for all eternity. i couldn’t contain myself i was shaking so hard, and the whole arena was on the verge of exploding. those screams man THOSE SCREAMS WHEN HE APPEARED. i was very far to the stage so when i saw sarah arriving with that blue gliterry jacket, i thought i saw harry lol. what an emotional rollercoaster.

- before he arrived, they played bohemian rhapsody, you’re my best friend (god how gay and larry!!) but also tiny dancer and let’s dance which are david bowie and elton’s songs. lgbt artists. ONLY LGBT ARTISTS. HOW MORE OBVIOUS CAN YOU BE? when they played olivia the arena BURST. everyone was screaming and trying to sing as fast as the boys lol. and there was this one confused grandpa not so far from me wondering what was happening lol.

- when harry played medicine there was too much noise for me to hear the lyrics (it’s when i came back from the concert that i saw he sang “i mess around with HIM”) but it was WILD nonetheless. i didn’t listen to the song previously to have the surprise and man?? it was truly something. legit one of my favorite harry songs.

- anna was also amazing. and people were trying (me included) to sing the lyrics even if we didn’t know them lol.

- when harry walked to the b stage i was trying to follow him with my eyes but that fucker was way too fast lmaooo.

- i expected to lost it during sott, woman, kiwi, sweet creature, just a little bit of your heart, if i could fly (everyone knew he was going to sing it but the reaction omg it was as if we didn’t even know) and honestly most of the songs but the one that took me by surprise was ever since new york. i nearly cried during that one.

-generally the whole experience is impossible to describe. seeing ur idol for the first time? you cannot find the right words. i didn’t think it was possible but this was even better than i expected. i can’t wait to see him again & the rest of the boys :’)

- also the outfit that i wore to the concert (a love always wins shirt + a rainbow flag painted on my cheek) i never thought i could do this one day. not in a lifetime. being proud, unapologetic about my love. at first walking on the streets when going to the concert made me anxious and i was trying to hide the whole thing because i was afraid to meet homophobes. but the closer i got to bercy, the more comfortable i become, to the point that in the subway, i was smiling proudly at everyone. i wanted them to see the rainbow. and that’s all thanks to harry and louis who helped me so much with this. i couldn’t never thank enough for this, nor the fandom who created such a safe place for me to feel good with myself.

#i could write an essay but i'm going to stop here :')#also rocio if you're passing by i'm so sad i missed you!! i would have loved to meet you!#my posts

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5tornhomos · 4 years

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Always Your Advocate - Chapter 9

Story Summary: After five years of being in one of the most successful boy bands in the world, Harry Styles is about to embark on his solo career. While at Columbia, he meets Bethany Russo, who’s just been assigned to work with him. As much as she wants to remain professional, she just can’t keep away from him.

Chapter Summary: As a thank you for taking care of him, Harry sends Beth a special gift

Word Count: 2.7k

Masterlist / AO3 / Wattpad

Beth was looking forward to her nightly chat with Harry. The entire day at work, he’s all that she thought about. Every time she had a long or stressful day at work, Harry would always make her feel better. The night before, Harry seemed very excited about the package he was sending her. He insisted that she wait until they were able to FaceTime, so he could see her reaction when she opened it. He seemed more excited about this package than anything he’s ever sent her.

Beth arrived home from work to find two packages waiting on her doorstep. The one that immediately grabbed her attention was a very large box. She went to lift it and found that the package was heavy too. She guessed that it probably weighed around 30 pounds, which was a bit difficult for Beth to carry, due to her small frame. Although Beth was used to Harry sending her packages, this one seemed massive compared to the others. In addition to the large box, there was a thin box, which was lightweight. She still had no idea what Harry could’ve sent her, and these boxes didn’t give her any clues. If possible, they confused her even more. But considering how excited Harry seemed, Beth couldn’t wait to open the packages. As soon as she got in the door, Beth immediately FaceTimed with Harry.

“Hi handsome, how are you doing?” she asked Harry.

“Better now that I’m talking to you. Did you get my deliveries today?” he asked.

“Yes, I did! I got two packages,” she said, showing him the two boxes.

“Good. This was just my little thank you for taking care of me all week when I was in New York,” he told her.

“Harry… you don’t have to keep thanking me. I didn’t mind taking care of you. I was happy to do it,” she said.

“Well, I still wanted to give you something special, something I’ve been wanting you to have for a while. But you have to promise me that once you open it, you can’t tell anyone about it. You can’t share it with anyone, especially the people at the label. Promise me?” Harry asked.

“Okay, got it. Keeping us a secret is kind of our thing. I can handle that. I promise I can keep this to myself. Can I open it now?” Beth asked.

She was eagerly waiting, standing by with her boxcutter to open the package. It was a tool Beth had used more frequently since harry sent her gifts so often. She was so excited and could barely wait any longer.

“What’s the rush? Let’s sit and talk for a few minutes. How was your day? Tell me about the weather in New York,” Harry teased, knowing how excited Beth was to open the package.

“Harry! The suspense is killing me. I’ve been thinking about this all day. Can I open it, please?” she begged.

“Ok fine. You can open them. But you have to start with the bigger box first,” he instructed.

Beth eagerly took her box cutter to begin opening the larger box, carefully cutting the tape. She pulled open the front of the box and removed all the filler.

“Oh my god, it’s beautiful,” was Beth’s first reaction.

Beth opened the box to see a stunning mahogany brown vintage-looking Victrola record player. It was something she and Harry talked about on their second date because he was surprised that she never owned one. Beth was so excited about this gift that she almost couldn’t wait to set it up.

“Well, I thought you deserved to have your own record player, considering the type of job that you have,” Harry told her.

“Harry, this is too much. You didn’t have to do this,” she told him. Sometimes Beth felt overwhelmed by the number of gifts Harry sent her. She felt like she didn’t deserve it.

“It’s not too much, after everything you’ve done for me. But you haven’t even opened the second box yet. I think you’ll appreciate that one even more,” Harry told her.

Now that Beth saw what was in the first box, she guessed what would be in the other package. She assumed that it would be the start of her record collection. It only seemed logical. Beth thought about some of the records Harry spoke about on their second date, when they visited the vintage record shop. He spoke about some of his artists like Fleetwood Mac, Prince, and David Bowie. Beth guessed that Harry could’ve sent her a record from one of those artists.

Beth opened the second package, with the contents wrapped in lots of bubble wrap. She unraveled it to find a record, with a plain, blank cover on. The cover didn’t have a label, which left Beth feeling confused.

“Why is it missing a label? I don’t understand. What record is this?” Beth questioned. She thought maybe it was an older record and original cover had been lost or destroyed. But the record was not the one she expected.

“That, my dear, is my new album. Outside of the people who wrote and produced it with me, you will be one of the first people to listen to it, if you’re interested. Since it’s not out yet, I had it made just for you,” Harry told her.

When Beth was told that it was Harry’s album, she was overcome with emotion. She couldn’t help but let a few tears fall from her eyes. From her late-night talks with Harry, she knew how hard he was working on this album. He put so much time and effort into it, and Beth felt honored that she would be one of the first people to listen to it. Beth knew that Harry was a perfectionist, so she thought that it would be a few weeks, or even months, before she heard his album. So, this gift was completely unexpected.

“I hope you enjoy it, but I know that you’ll be honest with me,” Harry said.

“Harry, this is really special to me. I can’t even tell you how much I appreciate this. I’m not sure how I can ever repay you,” Beth said, as she wiped away a tear.

“Well, you can repay me by listening to it and telling me how you feel,” he told her.

“Absolutely. I can’t wait to listen to it,” Beth told him, as she was beaming with pride.

“I plan on sending you a few more records to add to your collection. But I thought that this would be a good start,” he said.

“I feel honored that your album is my first vinyl record. I wouldn’t have wanted it to be anyone else,” she told him. At this point she was holding the record close to her chest, not wanting to let it go.

“Well I’m happy that you’ll finally be able to listen to it,” Harry said.

“So, tell me. Does this mean that your album is finished?” she asked.

Since Beth met Harry, she was begging him to hear some of his new music. She was so curious to hear what his music would sound like. But Harry never showed her anything. He never even gave her any hints as to what genre he was going for. But Harry was a perfectionist. He told Beth that he didn’t want anyone to listen to the music until it was done.

“I might want to tweak a few things, but I think that it’s basically finished. I think you’ll be the main judge of that. I’m really curious to hear your opinion,” Harry told her.

“Well, I’m flattered that you wanted me to be the first person to hear it. Do you trust me?” she questioned.

“100%,” he responded.

Harry knew that Beth was the perfect person to listen to his album for the first time. It wasn’t just because she worked for his record label. The fact that she had experience in music was just an added bonus. Harry wanted Beth to hear the album because he knew that she would be honest with him. He trusted her opinion and he knew that she wouldn’t just sugarcoat everything. She would share her honest feedback and tell him if there were parts that he needed to work on. She wasn’t the type of person to lie, just to make Harry feel good. Harry felt like if he was going to take any sort of criticism, he would rather hear it from her first.

“Are you relieved that your album is basically finished?” she asked. After all the time and effort that Harry has put into his music, Beth assumed that it would be a huge relief to feel so close to finishing it.

“I’m terrified,” Harry admitted.

“You’re terrified? Why? Are you not happy with how it turned out?” she questioned.

“No. I love it. I’m really proud of it. In a weird way, it’s my favorite thing to listen to,” he told her.

“Then what are you worried about? Do you not trust your judgment?” she wondered. She had a sense of why he might be nervous, but she wanted to let him get his feelings out.

“Every time I listen to it, I overthink it and wanting to change little things. I go back and forth trying to decide if it’s good enough, or if there’s something I can do to make it better. When it’s still in progress, I know that I can still make changes. But once it’s out, that’s it. It’s final and I can’t fix it anymore. And this time around, if it doesn’t go well, I have no one else to blame. It’s my album, with my name on it,” Harry explained.

“Or, when everyone loves your album, you’re the one that will get all the praise,” she said, trying to cheer him up a bit.

Beth couldn’t even imagine the type of pressure that Harry was under. He had everyone trying to guess what type of music he would put out. Inevitably, anything he does would be compared to One Direction. Sometimes Harry thought that it would be impossible to ever top that level of success. But he didn’t want to be compared to his past. He wanted to carve his own path and be successful in his own right.

Over the next few days, Harry’s album was the only thing that Beth listened to. She carefully listened to each song, taking in every word and every note. She intended on making notes, so she would have something to tell Harry. But Beth could barely think straight because she felt an overwhelming sense of pride when she listened to the album. With each unique song, it reminded Beth of how talented Harry is. Beth believed that this album showed his strengths as a songwriter, but also showed how much he has improved as a vocalist.

Harry gave Beth some time to listen to the album on her own. He figured it might be a bit awkward to watch her listen to the whole thing. But he was anxious to hear her thoughts.

“Give it to me. Honest thoughts only, please,” Harry requested.

“Every time I listen to “Sign of the Times” I start crying. Then I get to “Sweet Creature” and I cry all over again. So, with songs like that, I thought you were going for a soft folksy, type of sound. Then I got to “Kiwi” …” she started to tell him.

“You didn’t like that one? Was it too much? Should I stick to one genre?” Harry worried.

“Oh, no. I don’t think so. Honestly, I’m beginning to think that you can pull off any genre. Why are you so good at everything? It’s infuriating,” she joked.

“Sorry I’ll try to make a crappy song next time,” he laughed.

After Harry gifted Beth his album, she couldn’t stop listening to it. She felt so excited to help share his album with the world. Listening to the album lit a fire under Beth, and she felt even more motivated to promote it to the best of her ability. She wanted to help Harry become as successful as possible.

Beth’s boss, Ron, and some other people at Columbia were getting increasingly anxious because they hadn’t heard any of Harry’s music yet. It was getting closer to the time that Harry was supposed to pick his first single, but nobody else heard any music yet, except for Beth of course.

“Aren’t you a bit worried that you’re planning the promotion for something that you haven’t heard yet? We still have no idea what this album will sound like,” Ron told Beth, just a few days after she heard the album for the first time.

“I’m not worried. I believe in him. I think that whatever genre he decides to go for, he’ll do a great job. I don’t think he’ll disappoint,” Beth assured Ron, as if she didn’t have any inside knowledge.

Working for Harry, it was starting to become difficult to hide her relationship with him. She was starting to feel guilty that she was being dishonest to her boss and coworkers. Beth also had to be careful not to reveal things that Harry said to her in a personal conversation. In this case, she had to pretend like she didn’t know what his music would sound like. In reality, Harry’s album was the only thing that Beth listened to for the past few days.

“Why don’t we call him and get an update?” Ron suggested.

Ron encouraged Beth to push Harry further since he was so anxious to hear what Harry had been working on. Beth didn’t want to be pushy, but she also didn’t want to upset her boss. She went into Ron’s office, so he could call Harry. Ron put the phone on speaker so they could both talk to Harry.

“Harry, it’s Ron from Columbia. You’re on speaker. I’m sitting here with Bethany. How are you doing?”

“Hi, Ron. I’m doing well, thanks for asking. And hello Bethany, it’s nice to speak with you again,’ Harry said, as if he hadn’t spoken to Beth just a few hours earlier.

“So, Harry, we’re calling because we’re so excited to hear your new music. We don’t want to rush you. But we were just hoping to get a sample of what you’ve been working on?” Ron asked.

“Would you and Bethany like to hear the song I’ve chosen as my first single?” Harry asked. Ron’s eyes lit up, as he was thrilled to finally get the opportunity to hear some of Harry’s music.

“Sure, I would love to hear your single for the time,” Beth lied. While at work, she had to constantly act like Harry wasn’t revealing information to her.

“I’m on my way to the studio, but can I email it over. You can get back to me and let me know what you think,” Harry suggested.

“That would be great, Harry. I really appreciate it. And I can imagine that Bethany is excited too,” Ron said.

“Ok great. I’ll send it over now. I’ll speak to you both soon,” Harry said, right before hanging up the phone. Beth tried to hide her smile, knowing that she would be speaking to Harry again that night.

Within a few minutes, Harry sent an email including an audio attachment of his first single. Ron was excited to hear Harry’s new music for the first time, and Beth had to pretend like this was the first time she was hearing it. As the notes for “Sign of the Times” began playing, Beth couldn’t help but smile. She had already listened to this song many times, and she knew how powerful the song was. Beth tried to maintain her composure, and not let Ron see her emotions. Every time Beth listened to that song, she started to cry. But now she had to pull herself together so that she wouldn’t cry in front of her boss.

Ron listened to the single and had a similar reaction to Beth, minus the crying. Ron was pleasantly surprised by the song and he was impressed at Harry’s vocal ability. Based on this song, Ron felt confident that Harry was going to produce a hit album, something Beth was eager to help accomplish.

#Harry Styles #harry styles x ofc #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fic #one direction #one direction fanfiction #always your advocate #aya

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eddycurrents · 7 years

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For the week of 18 December 2017

Quick Bits:

Accell #6 concludes Danny’s first confrontation with new villain Midnight Blue and it’s interesting to see him still navigating how to be a hero, in this case ultimately failing. Damion Scott’s art is easily worth the price of admission alone.

| Published by Lion Forge / Catalyst Prime

Angelic #4 really starts getting into the happenings behind the scenes and the truth of what humans did before disappearing from the face of the Earth. It also shows that both the monks and the mans have been perpetuating their own ideologies and systems of belief to retain their own power structures. Not surprising, but like Orwell’s Animal Farm it’s a good way to show us some of our own failings through analogy.

| Published by Image

Assassinistas #1 isn’t exactly what I was expecting, but this is better. For whatever reason, I was expecting madcap female assassin action a la Kill Bill. That element is present, but this is really an interesting, humorous, and heartfelt look at three women who were assassins, who have moved on with their lives to create families and different situations. It’s about what happens after the usual exploitation movie, and it’s wonderful. Tini Howard has created some believable and interesting characters that are perfectly suited to Gilbert Hernandez bringing them to life.

| Published by IDW / Black Crown

Backways #1 is off to a good start. Anna’s girlfriend Sylvia goes missing amidst dabbling with magic and the occult, leading to Anna’s quest to find out what happened to her. Justin Jordan and Eleonora Carlini create some interesting characters and setting here, with some great art by Carlini.

| Published by AfterShock

Betty & Veronica: Vixens #2 gets us into the recruitment phase of the gang. I like the two narratives that Jamie Lee Rotante is providing, one of the current day gang and one of their formation. The art from Eva Cabrera fits this story perfectly.

| Published by Archie Comics

Dark Ark #4 gives us the battle between Nex’s vampires and the rest of the ark. It’s not pretty. The art by Juan Doe, though, is glorious.

| Published by AfterShock

Deadpool vs. Old Man Logan #3 manages to make Wade and Logan feel like an old married couple. It’s hilarious.

| Published by Marvel

Evolution #2 makes me sad that this isn’t weekly or released in huge chunks. The story from James Asmus, Joe Keatinge, Christopher Sebela, and Joshua Williamson is great, with each group of characters having their own unique point of view to give a broader picture of the coming epidemic. But the real star remains Joe Infurnari, whose art just pulls the whole thing together and elevates it to what’s looking like a horror masterpiece.

| Published by Image / Skybound

The Family Trade #3 sends Jessa on the run as the intrigue amongst the Family and the Clans begin to reach a boiling point. Morgan Beem’s art again makes this one of the most unique looking books on the shelves, very well done.

| Published by Image

Hellboy: Krampusnacht is a beautiful one-shot illustrated by Adam Hughes showcasing Hellboy vs. Krampus. It’s a fun take on the folklore, changing it up to more suit Hellboy’s world.

| Published by Dark Horse

Jim Henson’s The Storyteller: Fairies #1 kicks off a new anthology mini series with Matt Smith’s interpretation of the Icelandic fairy tale, “The Elf Queen and the Shepherd”. It’s a good story, with a bit of humour about talkative birds, and Smith’s art is beautiful.

| Published by Boom Entertainment / Archaia

Joe Golem: Occult Detective #4: Flesh & Blood #1 starts off a new two-parter with an interesting mystery of either a haunted house or a possessed woman or possibly both. Although the stories by Mike Mignola and Christopher Golden are good, the main draw for this series for me has been Patric Reynolds’ depictions of the Drowning City. New York City recast as a derelict Venice just has something inherently right about it and Reynolds continuously nails the visuals.

| Published by Dark Horse

Kong on the Planet of the Apes #2 continues to feel like a seamless fusion between the two properties. The artwork from Carlos Magno is wonderful as expected, and I really like how Ryan Ferrier has incorporated some of the tropes of Kong stories, even briefly in the explorer’s notes as narration at the beginning of this issue.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

Made Men #4 makes a bit of a mess of their operation regarding the captain who ordered the hit on Jutte and her squad. There are some great comedy moments again this issue with Hadry continuing to adjust to the changes in society. Month in, month out, Paul Tobin and Arjuna Susini continue to make this one of my favourite books on the shelves.

| Published by Oni Press

Marvel Two-in-One #1 finally gets around to dealing with the aftermath of Secret Wars and the disappearance of Reed and Sue. Chip Zdarsky and Jim Cheung manage to create something mournful and beautiful here.

| Published by Marvel

Optimus Prime #14 closes out the “Dead Come Home” arc with more gorgeous artwork from Livio Ramondelli. It’s also interesting as to how many threads John Barber is weaving from to craft this story. There’s bits from various Spotlight issues, the Dinobots trilogy, the recent Shining Armor mini, the First Strike crossover, and more, yet it never seems confusing or busy.

| Published by IDW

Redlands #5 is probably the darkest issue to date. While it focuses a bit on Bridget’s history, with Zuzu and with darker entities further back in time, it also dives deep into different narratives of abuse, “ownership”, and forced prostitution.

| Published by Image

ROM and the Micronauts #1 spins out of the First Strike crossover, but there’s not much continuity there that isn’t repeated in the first couple of pages. The rest of the book is heavier on the previous ROM series continuity, but it shouldn’t really serve as an impediment. Basically, ROM and the Micronauts team up to take on the combined forces of the Dire Wraiths and Baron Karza, then everything goes to hell. Christos Gage sets up an interesting predicament for the heroes and a compelling reason for them to continue together. Paolo Villanelli again proves adept at just about everything the Hasbroverse can throw at him artistically.

| Published by IDW

Sherlock Frankenstein & The Legion of Evil #3 is a turning point in Lucy’s investigation, as she searches out the Metal Minotaur and uncovers some of the secrets of Sherlock Frankenstein’s villainous meeting. The twist is interesting and should lead to a good final confrontation. The art again from David Rubín is truly amazing.

| Published by Dark Horse

Star Wars: Doctor Aphra #15 begins Aphra’s latest mission for the murder bots. The dialogue for this issue from Si Spurrier is just spot on as it punches up some of the more humorous aspects of the series. Emilio Laiso’s art also gets to shine again, with some of the best depictions of various species throughout the Star Wars universe.

| Published by Marvel

Summit #1, like Noble and KINO, focuses on one of the astronauts who were sent out to stop the asteroid from crashing into Earth. Ostensibly, Valentina Resnick-Baker was the only one to publicly survive, even though we as readers know at least the fates of David Powell and Alistair Meath, which makes Val’s supposed visions of her crew a little more interesting. Amy Chu and Jan Duursema seem to have one of the more central books here to the comics universe’s central plot, with explicit ties to Foresight and following up on the deliberate murders of scientists who knew the truth about the asteroid, so it’s nice to see the story focus on character more than plot. It’s also really nice to see Duursema’s art again.

| Published by Lion Forge / Catalyst Prime

Tales of Suspense #100 is a great first issue from Matthew Rosenberg and Travel Foreman. Rosenberg’s Hawkeye is very much in the Fraction vein and his interactions throughout the comic are hilarious.

| Published by Marvel

Transformers: Till All Are One Annual 2017 brings both the series and Mairghread Scott’s tenure to a close. This ties up a few loose ends from the series and from the First Strike crossover, while giving Cybertron a new status quo going forward. This change hasn’t been reflected yet in the other Transformers titles yet, but it should be interesting to see a potentially friendlier and more progressive Cybertron. I am hoping that some of the personal revelations about Starscream will be picked up by either Optimus Prime or Lost Light.

| Published by IDW

Unholy Grail #5 brings the series to a close. In order to do so, it jumps over a few things, and pushes forward the timeline, which to me makes it feel a little rushed compared to previous issues. Still, the entire series has been a bleak reinterpretation of the Arthurian myth and that time shift adds to the feeling of emptiness. Wonderful artwork from Mirko Colak.

| Published by AfterShock

Other Highlights: 30 Days of Night #1, America #10, The Beautiful Death #4, Big Trouble in Little China: Old Man Jack #4, Centipede #5, Champions #15, Curse Words Holiday Special, Dark Fang #2, Defenders #8, Doctor Strange 383, Generation X #85, Genius: Cartel #5, Guardians of the Galaxy #149, The Harcourt Legacy #2, The Hard Place #5, Head Lopper #8, Horizon #17, Incredible Hulk #711, Lazaretto #4, Luke Cage #168, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers #22, Mighty Thor #702, Monsters Unleashed #9, Ms. Marvel #25, Ninja-K #2, Old Man Logan #32, Peter Parker: The Spectacular Spider-Man #298, Quantum & Woody! #1, The Realm #4, Rockstars #8, The Shadow #5, Spider-Gwen #27, Star Wars: Poe Dameron #22, TMNT Universe #17, Tomb Raider: Survivor’s Crusade #2, Uncanny Avengers #30, Unholy Grail #5, Vampirella #9, Venom #159, Wormwood: Gentleman Corpse Christmas Special, X-Men: Grand Design #1

Recommended Collections: All New Guardians of the Galaxy - Volume 2: Riders in the Sky, Black Hammer - Volume 2: The Event, Cosmic Scoundrels, Deadly Class - Volume 6, Grrl Scouts: Magic Socks, Hawkeye - Volume 2: Masks, Hillbilly - Volume 2, Monsters Unleashed, Secret Weapons, Superb - Volume 1: Life After the Fallout, The Unbelievable Gwenpool - Volume 4: Beyond the Fourth Wall

d. emerson eddy is going to collapse and go to sleep now.

#This Week in Comics

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weekendwarriorblog · 6 years

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WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND March 22, 2019 - US

Of course, the big movie of the weekend is Jordan Peele’s US (Universal), his follow-up to his Oscar-winning mega-hit Get Out, this one starring Lupita Nyong’o and Winston Duke from Black Panther. Right now, from the reactions and rave reviews out of its SXSW premiere, Peele is not going to experience a sophomore slump and the world will continue to be his oyster. (As of this writing, I personally haven’t seen the movie yet, but I’ll be attending the New York premiere on Tuesday night and hope to have a review done and posted some time Wednesday.)

You can read what I think of the box office prospects for Jordan Peele’s Us over at The Beat, and here’s MY REVIEW OF US.

A24 is also expanding Sebastian Lelio’s GLORIA BELL, a drama starring Julianne Moore which I loved, into more theaters on Friday, and that could also make an entry into the top 10 as solid counter-programming to Peele’s movie.

But let’s get to what hopefully you’re reading this for… and that’s the other stuff in theaters this weekend.

LOCAL FESTIVALS

I’m gonna start with this section this week, because I’m so excited about something going on at the IFC Center -- not the first time and definitely won’t be the last -- as it’s the 2nd annual WHAT THE FEST?!, which I sadly missed last year. This year’s line-up is slammin’, opening on Wednesday night with the World Premiere of Larry (Habit) Fessendern’s new movie Depraved, his take on Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. Later on Wednesday is the NYC Premiere of the Swedish film The Unthinkable and then on Thursday is the NYC Premiere of Pollyanna McIntosh’s Darlin’, a sequel to Jack Ketchum’s 2009 movie The Woman, which was in turn a sequel to Offspring.

I have seen a couple of the movies including Penny Lane’s doc Hail Satan?about the Satanic Temple’s fight against theocracies in the form of states trying to put statues of the Ten Commandments on government sites. It’s a movie that has humor as well as politics, and it’s part of the all-day Satan-themed Sunday that will include my buddy Grady Hendrix doing a presentation in conjunction with his novel We Sold Our Souls. Friday night is the New York premiere of Emma Tammi’s The Wind, an amazing Western horror film set in the desolate wasteland, starring Caitlin Gerrard (Insidious: The Last Key) and Julia Goldani Telles (Slenderman).

If there’s one movie you ABSOLUTELY MUST SEE, it’s Shinichiro Ueda’s horror-comedy One Cut of the Dead, which is very hard to describe without spoiling but imagine if a film crew making a zombie movie is attacked by real zombies… and then throw any conceptions you might have about the movie out the window. I have to thank my pal David Jaffee for recommending the movie so highly, as it’s a very clever take on zombies. (And honestly, at this point, I have no idea if and when it will get U.S. distribution.) I probably won’t have a chance to see Roxanne Benjamin’s Body at Brighton Rock but Magnolia is opening it in April so hopefully I’ll see it before then.

LIMITED RELEASES

Opening in New York and L.A. on Friday before a wide release on March 29 is HOTEL MUMBAI (Bleecker Street), the directorial debut by Anthony Maras, which looks at the 2008 terrorist attacks on the Taj Hotel. It stars Dev Patel, Armie Hammer and Jason Isaacs as part of the ensemble cast dealing with Muslim terrorists who attacked the hotel in order to take Western hostages for ransom. It’s a solid debut by Maras, one with a lot of moving parts but handled sensitively and tactfully due to the nature of the events. I definitely recommend the movie if you have a chance to see it. It’s not quite United 93 but still very good.

Oscar-winning Hungarian filmmaker Laszlo Nemes (Son of Saul) returns with his new movie SUNSET (Sony Pictures Classics), set in Budapest 1913, as it follows Irisz Leiter as she arrives there to work as a milliner (hat salesperson) at the popular hat store that belonged to her parents, though she’s sent away by the owner Oszkar Brill. When a man shows up looking for Irisz’s brother Kalman, she begins to look into her lost past. I have to be honest that I wasn’t much of a fan of the movie, maybe because it was very long, slow and confusing to the point where I really didn’t understand much of what was happening. Clearly, it’s not a film on par with Son of Saul, although I guess some people might like it more than I did. It probably will open in New York and L.A., as that’s the way Sony Classics usually does things.

Filmmaker S. Craig Zahler (Bone Tomahawk) returns with his latest genre film DRAGGED ACROSS CONCRETE (Summit/Lionsgate), a police thriller starring Mel Gibson and Vince Vaughn as disgraced police officers who decide to hijack an ambitious heist, stealing the bars of gold that were stolen by a group of robbers. It’s a decent movie if you’re into this sort of thing. Zahler keeps improving as a filmmaker and here, he makes a movie with the weight of Steve McQueen’s Widows, although I thought Tory Kittles was far more interesting than the two leads, even though they do have good chemistry together. This will open in select cities Friday.

Opening at the Film Forum on Wednesday is a wonderful doc by Dutch filmmaker Heddy Honnigmann called BUDDY, which looks at a number of people and their relationships with incredible service dogs who help them get through everything from blindness to PTSD. This really is a wonderful movie, especially if you’re a dog-lover because all of the dogs have personalities as interesting as their masters.

Also opening at Film Forum Friday and at the Lammle Monica Film Center is Nancy Schwartzman’s new documentary Roll Red Roll (Together Films) looks at a 2012 incident of high school sexual assault in Steubenville, Ohio where a young woman was raped by the football team. It’s a harrowing story but if you’re interested in the type of true crime docs that are all over Netflix, this one should interest you as well. (It’s particularly struggling for me to watch it, having one nephew in high school not too far away from where this happened.)

A movie that I saw and reviewed out of the Tribeca Film Festival last year was Robert Budreau’s STOCKHOLM, which reunites him with Ethan Hawke from Born to Blue, this time playing a bank robber who robs a bank in Sweden with his partner (Mark Strong) and takes a bank manager (Noomi Rapace) hostage before she falls for him … leading to the term “Stockholm Syndrome.” No, I’m not making that up. I don’t remember hating or loving this but just thought it was okay, probably elevated by the presence of the cast.

Patricia Clarkson, Jacki Weaver, James Caan and Toby Jones star in Carol Morley’s thriller OUT OF BLUE (IFC Films) about a New Orleans detective (Clarkson) searching for the killer of a renowned astrophysicist (played by Mamie Gummer), who was shot to death in her observatory. I’ll try to watch this and write more about it soon.

John Travolta and Toby Sebastian star in Karzan Kader’s Trading Paint (Saban Films/Lionsgate), playing a fat her and son racing duo who have a falling out, something that a rival racing company uses to drive a wedge further into the relationship. The movie has been on Ultra VOD for the last month but it will open in select theaters and regular VOD Friday.

Following a one-night theatrical release in 150 theaters on Tuesday, Jesse V. Johnson’s action-thriller Triple Threat (Well GO USA), starring Tony Jaa (Ong-Bak) and Iko Uwais (The Raid) will be available in select theaters and VOD. They are part of a team of mercenaries sent to stop a group of assassins from killing a billionaire’s daughter. It also stars Scott Adkins, Tiger Chen, Michael Jai White and more.

Joel Proykus’ video game comedy Relaxer (Oscilloscope) stars Josh Burge (who previously starred in Proykus’ Ape) as Abbie who is trying to beat the impossible 256thlevel of Pac-Man with no food or water and a bunch of friends and acquaintances showing up. The comedy also stars David Dastmalchian (Ant-Man) and it opens in select cities.

Eric Khoo’s Ramen Shop (Strand Releasing) also opens in New York at the IFC Center and Landmark at 57 West. It follows a young Ramen chef named Masato who leaves Japan to go on a culinary journey through Singapore where he discovers family secrets and new recipes. It will expand to L.A. and other cities on April 5.

As far as streaming, we get our third Western in three weeks with Scott Martin’s Big Kill (Cinedigm), starring Christoph Sander, Jason Patric and more. It involves a Philadelphia accountant who travels West to join the family business who meets up with two rogues who have been run out of Mexico. It’s on VOD now.

REPERTORY

METROGRAPH (NYC):

Harmony Korine will be on-hand Friday for the start of a special seriesshowing his films, including 2012’s Spring Breakers, as well as showing 1995’s Kids, which he wrote. (It’s all to prepare for the release of Korine’s latest film The Beach Bum, starring Matthew McConaughey, which will screen for members only.) Film Society of Lincoln Center director Kent Jones ventures downtown to promote his new movie Diane with a “Dream Double Feature” of Westerns The Shooting (1966) and Rio Bravo (1959) on Saturday afternoon. Late Nites at Metrograph will show Catherine Reillat’s Fat Girlon Wednesday night and then Masahiro Shinoda’s 1969 film Double Suicide on Friday and Saturday nights. This week’s Playtime: Family Matinees is Ken Kwapis’ 1996 monkey comedy Dunston Checks In, starring Jason Alexander from Seinfeld.

THE NEW BEVERLY (L.A.):

Weds. afternoon shows a singular screening of The Three Faces of Eve (1957) starring Joanne Woodward. This week’s double features are John Ford’s Fort Apache (1948), starring John Wayne, with Robert Aldrich’s Ulzana’s Raid (1972) on Weds. and Thurs, the comedy double feature of Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)and Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life (1983) on Friday and Saturday, and then the Paul Wendkos double feature of The Mephisto Waltz (1971) and Special Delivery (1976) on Sunday and Monday. This weekend’s midnight movies are Tarantino’s Kill Bill Vol. 2 on Friday night and Woody Allen’s Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Sex But Were Afraid to Ask on Saturday. The weekend’s KIDDEE MATINE is Clarence Brown’s 1944 National Velvet, starring Mickey Rooney and Elizabeth Taylor. On Monday, the Bev shows the amazing Parker Posey breakthrough film Party Girl (1995) with director Daisy von Scherler Mayer in person, then Tuesday’s GRINDHOUSE double feature is two from Hong Kong, The Tattoo Connection (1978) and another “Bruce Li” movie Exit the Dragon, Enter the Tiger, also from 1978.

FILM FORUM (NYC):

The ongoing Bob & Wray: A Hollywood Love Story series continues this week with the Fay Wray double feature of The Clairvoyant (1935) and Black Moon (1934) on Weds, the Bill Riskin-penned Mister 880 (1950) and Broadway Will (1934) Thursday, then even more Frank Capra with American Madness (1932) and The Miracle Woman (1931)on Friday (and again, next Tuesday). The weekend sees a 35mm print of King Kongshown as part of Film Forum Jr., as well as in a double feature with The Most Dangerous Game (1932) on Saturday and again on Monday. Also showing this weekend is The Four Feathers ( 1929) – with live piano accompaniment--on Saturday and Magic Town (1947) and Capra’s Meet John Doe (1941) on Sunday. Also Sunday is a single-showing horror double feature of The Mystery of the Wax Museum and The Vampire Bat, both from 1933 and both starring Wray.

EGYPTIAN THEATRE (LA):

Before coming to New York’s Metrograph, Harmony Korine will be here in person for a Thursday screening of Trash Humpers and Spring Breakers, plus “Bruno Ganz Remembered” continues as the Egyptian also shows Wim Wenders’ Wings of Desire on Sunday. (At one point, the theater was also showing a double feature of Nosferatu, The Vampire and The American Friend, too.) Old movie fans might also be interested in “The Musketeers of Pig Alley” and More Films of 1912, which a series of shorts by D.W. Griffith that run on Saturday and Sunday.

IFC CENTER (NYC)

Waverly Midnights: The Feds wraps up with Steven Spielberg’s 2002 movie Catch Me If You Can, starring Tom Hanks and Leonardo DiCaprio. Weekend Classics: Early Godard also concludes this weekend with Pierrot Le Fou (1965) while this weekend’s Late Night Favorites is David Lynch’s Mulholland Drive.

MOMA (NYC):

MOMA continues the series Modern Matinees: B is for Bacall with the 1953 filmHow to Marry a Millionaireon Wednesday, Vincente Minelli’s 1955 film The CobwebThursday and Jonathan Glazer’s more recentBirth (2004) on Friday.

BAM CINEMATEK (NYC):

For whatever reason, BAM is screening Michaelangelo Antonioni’s 1970 “classic” Zabriskie Point on Friday night – I’m not really a fan -- as part of BAM and Triple Canopy: On Resentment, but already sold out is Mathieu Kassovitz’s 1995 film La Haine, starring Vincent Cassel, and other interesting films in the series, like Steve McQueen’s Hunger, starring Michael Fassbender.

MUSEUM OF THE MOVING IMAGE (NYC):

The museum’s Tribute to Bruno Ganz will screen Wim Wenders’ Wings of Desire on Sunday, and it’s showing this year’s Oscar-Nominated Animated Shorts as part of its ongoing family program.

LANDMARK THEATRES NUART (LA):

The Nuart’s Friday midnight offering isJohn Waters’ Polyester (1981)starring the late Divine.

QUAD CINEMA (NYC):

The quad continues its Bertrand Blier series with the 40thanniversary restoration of his 1978 film Get Out Your Handkerchiefs.

AERO (LA):

The AERO is booked up this week with the West Coast version of the Canada Now!Series.

STREAMING AND CABLE

This Friday’s big Netflix streaming debut is Jeff (Bad Grandpa)Tremaine’s Motley Crue biopic THE DIRT, starring Douglas Booth, Iwan Rheon (Ramsay Bolton from Game of Thrones) and more. I haven’t seen it yet but I’ll probably watch it sometime this weekend.

That’s it for this week, but next week, we’ll get Tim Burton’s Dumboand more.

#Us JordanPeele WhatToWatchThisWeekend LimitedREleases Movies Repertory

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