#maeve calling her annie for the first time though :')

[supemaeve]

If Soldier Boy goes through with this, thousands will die. Help up stop him. // This ain't a bloody kinder care we're on about, son. It's Vought fucking Tower.

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

All I Ever Wanted, All I Ever Needed Pt. 2

Warnings: siblingxsibling implications, Homelander being such a narcissist that he falls in "love" with his own sibling, Homelander being a stalker, innocent reader, naive reader, Homelander being a basic menace, some uncomfortable parts, dubcon, secrets, manipulation, grooming (feel like that's what Homelander is doing), age gap, power imbalance, there will be one more part after this then i think i'm gonna wrap up this little story

Words: 3472

Summary: Starlight unravels the secrets which Homelander and Vought so desperately wanted to keep in the dark.

Part 1 Part 3

Annie was still reeling from the events of yesterday. She'd barely stepped foot into her apartment before a Vought assistant was scrambling to reach her. They inform Annie about the dinner being held that night to introduce a Seven-Trainee. This only further raised the hairs of alarm on the back of her neck.

Worst of all was that you nor anyone else saw a problem with this. Maeve wore her mask well and kept her thoughts to herself though their conversation was till fresh. Maeve really wanted to ignore how odd it was.

Maeve rose her glass with everyone else, a smile plastered across her face. And you, you were beyond happy; unaware of the wolf that paraded beside you. Annie could barely stomach her meal, forcing down bits of lamb but the richness of it soured immediately on her tongue.

Thankfully once everyone seemed to finish, the group parted ways with you and Homelander walking away together side by side.

That night was hard to sleep, even after calling Hughie and telling him all about it. He'd said that him and the Boys would look into it. See what they could find on you. That did help enough to lull Annie to sleep.

Reality was there in the Seven's conference room though, cheerfully beaming up at Annie.

"Good morning Starlight!" You chirp, the mug in your hand is put down forgotten by her entrance. Homelander is taking slow sips of his coffee, watching their interaction like a hawk. Annie didn't have to look at him to know that. She could feel the drilling of his piercing blue eyes. The eyes of a sociopath.

She puts on her best face, similar to the ones she wore when meeting fans. "How was your first night in the Tower?"

"It was great!" Really, it had been a great night. Probably the best one in your life. After the delicious dinner Homelander took you out around the city, giving you an aerial tour. Then he got ice cream for the two of you to enjoy back on Vought Tower's roof. You listened to the urban music it made at night. Honking of cars, sizzling of food, the chatter of people; the city was so alive. Your nights at home were spent quietly.

The warmth that Homelander made you feel took you by surprise. From the moment he showed up at your house, you felt an immediate connection. Like the two of you meeting was fated, written in the stars. In a short amount of time, Homelander had embedded himself in you. Last night all you could think about was spending the next day with him and the rest of the Seven. He gave you comfort in a way your parents never did. They loved you sure but they never really understood you. They were fearful when you started flying. You didn't even want to remember the conniption your father had when you'd accidentally fried an expensive painting with your lasers. To them your powers were somewhat of a burden, not something to revel in.

Yesterday you'd used your powers more than you have in your entire life. Homelander encouraged you.

A bit of a cliche, you already felt yourself really falling in love with him. You'd already been fairly attracted to him to begin with. When you saw him on tv, he was your ideal of the perfect man. Well spoken, handsome, chivalrous- everything you thought your future partner would be. He ticked off all of those boxes.

Chances though that he reciprocated such feelings so soon was low. He must see you as still a child. The age difference didn't help either.

"She'll be shadowing me today." Homelander tells Starlight as she stops by the breakfast buffet that was set up for the Seven. Her hand lingers on the cup of coffee she'd poured herself. "Just to get an idea of what we do on a daily basis."

She raises her brows. "You're taking her out on the field so soon?"

It's obvious that Homelander doesn't like Starlight questioning his choices when it comes to you.

You cheerfully nod. You memorized the schedule Homelander had given to you a few moments before Starlight had entered the conference room. Holding out the sheet of paper to her, she takes it and looks it over.

Starlight doesn't remove her eyes from the paper. "Don't you think she'd benefit from shadowing myself or Maeve one of these days? It looks like she's mainly going to be with you and Black Noir."

He keeps his tight lipped smile. "I'm giving her the basics. Once she's advancing to my satisfaction she can work with you and Queen Maeve. For now I want to be hands on with her training. After all, anyone would kill to be taught by America's number one hero." Homelander's smile that he gives you sends your tummy in a flurry.

Taking everything in you to maintain a professional appearance, you hide your blush by taking a sip of your coffee. You didn't want Starlight to see you obviously simping for him. That would be embarrassing. You wanted to be taken seriously during your time here. This was a once in a life time opportunity that you didn't want to squander. You planned on absorbing everything you learn during your time with the Seven. Maybe one day. . . you'd be able to join their ranks. Wasn't that every little supe's dream?

Starlight was actually happy to see Black Noir and Maeve walk in, A-Train trailing behind them; his eyes glued to his phone.

You straighten in your seat, showing them that you understood the great privilege it was to be there with them. Your heart raced being around so many big names.

You listen attentively as the Seven get down to morning business.

The next few days are spent integrating yourself into the lifestyle and schedule of the Seven. Homelander took control of your training in the beginning, but he had other priorities that pulled him away from you. Much to both of your chagrin. He handed you off to Maeve during his busy hours. Unlike Homelander, Maeve isn't quite as warm. She's a tough teacher. Even when you walk around with her in public she keeps everything professional. She holds herself perfectly which you catch yourself trying to replicate. Maeve had you learning the different districts of New York. Important to understand the diversity in each and the crime statistics that reflected upon it.

"You need to know the streets like the back of your hand. Especially when criminals try to run. They'll do whatever it takes to shake you from their trail." Maeve explains. "Since you can fly, it'll be especially important for you to memorize an aerial map too."

You diligently studied any and all maps you could get ahold of. Even went as far as spreading all of them out around your apartment.

Problems came at the prospect of Maeve sparring with you. With someone like Maeve it was necessary to take care to not use the full capacity of your powers on her. She wasn't completely indestructible, unlike you and Homelander. Physical training would have to wait until Homelander's schedule freed up.

He texts you as you wait for him in Vought's state of the art gym. The both of you make plans after training to hang out.

Finding yourself internally swooning, you shake your head free of any thoughts of that ilk. You wanted to remain professional. He's just being friendly and must know that you might be missing your family.

And it was weird that you hadn't received any calls or texts from either your mom or your dad. When you'd attempted to contact them yourself they never answer. Your messages go unreturned.

You'd thought about paying an actual visit with this concerning behavior. They'd gone from helicopter parents to ghost quiet. Your schedule was just so busy. Maybe you'd take the time to ask Homelander if you could take time off to go.

When Starlight shows up, gym bag hanging off of her shoulder, she's pleasantly surprised to find you alone in the locker room. "Hey! I feel like I haven't seen you in a while."

She was still in her supe outfit but lacked her long lashes that she wore to public events and patrol. Still she was so pretty.

"I've been shadowing Queen Maeve during the day. And then training in the afternoons whenever Homelander's available. I tried sparring with Queen Maeve, but even when I tried not to punch so hard. . ." You rub your knuckles. Even when you held back you still sent Queen Maeve a couple of feet away before she steadies herself to get back up. Really, it was you who insisted to train with Homelander after that. You knew nothing you did would seriously hurt him.

Pressing her lips together, Starlight suggests "You know, I may not look it,, but I'm pretty tough." She offers you a tentative smile. "If you want to try sparring with me? I don't have much to do today."

"Really?"

"Sure! You're supposed to be learning from all of us, right?"

You enthusiastically nod and close your locker door before you hop to your feet. "Okay! Guess I should get a warm up in before Homelander gets here."

Both of you laugh as you exit the lockers side by side. It was odd when you remember that Starlight is only a year or two older than you. She carries herself with such confidence. Each stride she takes is strong. Every block she makes, calculated. She'd only been in the Seven for little more than a year and she fit in so easily.

As much as you idolized Homelander, you loved Starlight. Even after Vought decided to change her supe uniform to something more scandalous. From the first photoshoots she'd done in her new outfit, there was a look of contempt that shadowed her eyes. Clear that this change wasn't her decision. Whatever Vought was trying to make her out to be, Starlight would remain herself. She was still the bad ass girl that gave you hope that you could one day join the Seven officially.

Starlight proved to be a competent sparring partner. Dodging any of your offensive attacks. You had to move quick around her. She was fast, even impressing you.

Neither of you noticed when Homelander strolls into the gym where supes honed their skills. You don't see the twitching of his jaw or the haughty way he folds his arms in front of his expansive chest. His eyes are particularly glued to Starlight, the interloper. It was one thing letting you follow and learn from Maeve. Homelander didn't trust Starlight one bit. He'd always felt something off about her. She just felt fake to him. And he didn't like how her expression had become hostile when he introduced you. Like he was doing something wrong by bringing you to the Tower. He wonders if she knew the truth about you.

A trickle of sweat was rolling down the side of your face when you finally turn to where Homelander was standing. "Oh! Hey Homelander!" You use the front of your tank top to wipe your face.

He forces his iciness to melt just enough so that he could return your bright smile while still shooting Starlight eyes that could only mean 'watch yourself'. "I thought you didn't feel comfortable physically training with anyone but me?" Homelander puts on a tone of faux hurt.

"Starlight assured me that she's sturdier than she looks. And she was right! Plus she's fast and I hardly landed any serious blows to her." Confidence made your smile widen and Homelander felt that familiar clenching in his chest. How precious and perfect you were to him. Starlight threatened that. She could be a bad influence on you. He could already see you dressing in a skimpy outfit like Starlight wore. And while he wouldn't mind seeing that, he would mind everyone else's penetrating gaze. That was something he couldn't risk.

"You almost got me a few times." She chuckles in return, already feeling the both of you were becoming actual friends.

"Well," Homelander inserts himself between you two "thank you for warming her up, but I'm here now. I'll take over."

Starlight's smile waver, her dark eyes hardening toward the leader of the Seven. "Of course." Her warmth returns when she addresses you. "We should do that again. I had fun."

You felt like you could explode. "Y-yeah! I had fun too. I'll see you later!" You didn't have many friends, at least not organic friends that you made yourself.

Yeah, your friendship with Starlight was definitely not Homelander approved.

The entire time it takes Starlight to leave the gym, Homelander's glare didn't move from her back. He didn't like her around his sister one bit.

"Alright!" Your cheerful hum brings him back to you. "Now I can really go all out. You ready?"

Corner of his mouth curling up into one of affection. He'd put a pin in it, wait until later. For now, he just wanted to enjoy being around you and having you beam up at him like he was your own personal deity. Your main god whom you would always rely on.

With Homelander distracted, Starlight takes the opportunity to slink out of the Tower and to the Boys' hideout. Her gray hoodie covers her signature gold hair. Hopefully that and her ripped pants would deter anyone from her identity. What she was doing was not only stupid but dangerous. For her, for Hughie, even for Butcher who wasn't exactly her favorite person.

"Annie! I was about to call you." Hughie immediately opens the door once he spies her through the peephole. "That girl-"

Annie holds her breath, waiting for what information they'd scrounged up.

"Another fuckin' supe." Butcher steals Hughie's opportunity as his heavy gaze lands on Annie.

She blinks and turns to Hughie. "What's he talking about?"

Hughie ruefully glances at Butcher before finishing what he was going to say earlier "That girl is Homelander's sister."

"That's. . ." The air in her lungs was stolen for her as it sunk in. Homelander's predatory claim of her, his hovering. But did you even know? It didn't seem likely.

Sitting her down, Hughie goes on to divulge more of Vought's dirty secrets that they tried to bury. A lot of hard work went into finding anything about you. All they had to go off of was your name. Any lead they managed to get was followed up. It was a wonder that they ever came upon the truth of your origin.

Staring at the blotchy piece of paper that Frenchie handed her, Annie felt her mouth go completely dry. The page was weathered, an old copy that held stains on the surface. Some words were so faded that they were intelligible.

John [the Homelander] failure uncontrollable neutralize

Lack of normal childhood had greatly damaged the psyche of Homelander. The problem lay in the fact that Homelander was indestructible. There was no known way to seriously maim him.

That was where the conception of you was truly developed. You would be raised entirely different than how Homelander was. That was Vought's mistake.

This was a tightly held secret. No one was meant to know about it. It sounded like Stan Edgar and his gaggle of scientists did everything they possibly could to ensure that you being related to Homelander would never come out.

"I guess with the truth of Ryan, he must have grown even more suspicious and found the information himself." quietly mused Hughie.

"Where did you get this document?" Annie forces her eyes up to him.

That has Butcher scoffing "What's it to you?"

Hughie intercedes. "We broke into Vogelbaum's home. Wasn't exactly the easiest thing to do. He was one of the scientist in charge of Homelander when he was growing up."

Worriedly chewing on her bottom lip, Annie closes her eyes to replay all of Homelander's interactions with you. Something still wasn't right. Why didn't you know? And why hadn't Homelander told you yet?

All of those questions plague her trip back to the Tower. It was never a good idea for her to be gone for too long. Others might grow suspicious of her outings.

She shouldn't be poking her nose deeper into Vought's business. But she couldn't let you be influenced by someone like Homelander. He was lying to you like he was lying to the rest of the world about how much of a good person he was. He wasn't golden. He was tarnished and distorted. And by how you gaze at him, Annie worries that you'd be all too willing to be corrupted by him. Eventually Homelander will show his true colors. When he does it will be too late for you to back out. He won't let you. Annie could see your future unfold before her. How you'd be stuck in the Seven similar to everyone else, including herself.

Slipping back in easily, Annie had to shed her sweatshirt and pants to dawn her Starlight uniform. Well, it felt more like a costume to her now. Losing all meaning when she discovered the Seven were not as honorable as she'd first imagined.

You'd done so well during your training, Homelander deemed it only right that you get a special treat: a special viewing of the new Vought supe movie. Better was that it would be screened in Vought's private theatre that was only accessible for the higher ups in the company. For tonight, he'd call in a favor to reserve the whole room just for you. Gourmet treats would be included and anything else you wanted.

Going back to your room to shower and change, you show up in a comfortable pair of yoga pants and an old graphic tee. You're about to put on a lightweight jacket until you catch the buzzing of your phone.

Hope that it's your mom and or dad, you rush to where your phone was charging only to be disappointed. Just a useless app notification.

You try not to let it get to you but it was already nearing a month since you got there and you hadn't spoken to your parents once. Weighing the phone in your hand, you contemplate trying to call them again. Mind changing when you notice the time. You replace your morose mood to one of giddiness and slip your phone into the pocket of your yoga pants.

You were a little surprised to see him still in his uniform and partially embarrassed for yourself. Maybe you should have dressed up a little bit more?

Homelander didn't appear to mind. In fact his smile grew.

"Should I go back and change?"

"No, you're perfect. Just the way you are." His smile disarms any concern you may have previously had. "In fact I feel overdressed."

"Next time we'll have to coordinate outfit aesthetics." You chuckle and follow him in. The theatre was no yet darkened. This wasn't like any screening room you'd been in before. Each seat was the size of a couch that were capable of reclining. Except for the two of you, the room was completely empty.

Seeing Homelander in such a setting was a bit weird. Homelander was doing something as normal as sitting down and watching a movie was bizarre. He even used the reclining button for his own seat.

Before the movie started, he calls in for food and drinks be brought to the both of you.

Once you were in possession of your snacks, the room darkens and the screen comes to life.

You like when Homelander becomes your personal commentator. He tells you behind the scenes bloopers that others would not be privy to on the special features. Both of you are loud and don't care when you laugh or talk. Honestly you didn't pay much attention to the movie. You were more entertained with talking to Homelander and spending time with him.

The feeling was mutual. Homelander had never felt as carefree as he did when he was with you. Your laugh was a beautiful one that he wanted to hear all the time.

And with you looking at him with eyes that shine lightening strike blue from the light of the movie, he really couldn't hold himself back. He removes one of his red gloves and moves it to tenderly brush against your cheek, asking without using his words for your lips.

From that single point of contact, your entire body is set aflame. Your breath lodged in your throat as you realize what is about to happen. To show your consent you tilt your face up and allow him access.

Homelander doesn't waste a second in closing the gap.

Taglist:

@the-maladaptive-daydreamers

@demodemo909

[homielander]

the most interesting character detail about maeve through which i have extrapolated at least half my understanding of her is that she prefers to be called maeve. i frequently see "maggie" pop up in meta and fic as her chosen name, but quite literally nobody calls her that, including (and most significantly) elena. elena is maeve's tether to her humanity and her refuge away from vought, yet even elena only ever refers to her as maeve. (and in season 2, we learn that maeve started dating elena before she joined the seven -- before queen maeve's popularity would have become so inescapable that she would feel compelled to introduce herself by that name.) it's especially notable that in her final scene, maeve refers to starlight as annie for only the second time, but she is still called maeve by both annie and elena.

here's what we know about maeve's life as maggie: she had a rocky relationship with her father whom she doesn't seem to speak to anymore, she's from a "cousin-fucker hick town" as described by homelander -- i can't imagine this place being terribly lgbt-friendly, and she generally lacks connection with anyone she would have known before becoming queen maeve. she doesn't have fond memories of this time of her life, and perhaps that extends to all associations with it, including the name maggie.

i tend to think that becoming queen maeve was, in many ways, self-actualizing for her. the act that garners her national attention and earns her a ticket to vought is a heroic one -- she breaks every single bone in her right arm to save a school bus from falling off a bridge. and i know madelyn says she is responsible for the mythos of queen maeve, but this character was still aspirational, and likely someone maeve wanted to live up to. in any case, this new identity gave her a purpose and tools to achieve it: she wanted to help people! by her own admission, maeve enters vought bright-eyed and hopeful, not far off from annie. (maeve is also one of the only supes in the seven not to know about compound v -- she doesn't strike me as religious but believing she's among the very few born with powers would have strengthened her internal drive to be a hero.)

it's for the same reason that i think maeve actually... liked having powers? of course she says otherwise in her last season, but season 3 maeve is cynical and weary from about two decades of dealing with vought and homelander's abuse. they've used her first as the token woman and then the token gay person of the seven. after growing largely passive to the brutality of the job, the flight 37 incident forces her to confront all of the violence she's witnessed and tolerated. she's given pieces of herself away and she loathes the husk of herself that's left. i don't find it surprising that she would want to relinquish every single connection to vought, including her powers.

assuring herself that she will be better off without her powers comes with an added benefit: she gets to distinguish herself from homelander, who would be lost without his powers. and i think she is eager to make this distinction in her mind because there are some uncomfortable similarities between their initiations into vought. the mantle of homelander allows him to exert agency for the first time in his life, just as the mantle of queen maeve endows her with purpose for the first time in hers. (crucially, none of his current circle call him john, either.) they both enjoy being the most powerful superheroes in the world, the unending public adoration, and (in my interpretation) each other. they're also both overwhelmingly lonely and they know it -- homelander teases her multiple times about how she has no friends with a bit more bite in every passing season, while maeve is keenly aware of his isolation and exploits his yearning for love pretty effectively.

maeve steadily grows disillusioned with her position at vought because she still has a moral code, suppressed though it may be. even so, she nearly relents to homelander's vision: that they will be lonely at the top but lonely together. she's pulled out of her miserable state of inaction by annie and elena. annie reminds her of what a hero should be (what she was, once); elena offers her a way out of vought, serving as maeve's light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak.

she escapes that tower as maeve, not maggie. she rejects homelander's god complex which engenders his cruelty towards regular people and 'lesser' supes -- no one will call her queen maeve ever again, at least -- but it is still important to her to be a hero, and for better or for worse, she found that as maeve. i feel like she'd struggle to exist without her powers (possibly the self-awareness hasn't settled in yet) for all the reasons mentioned above. i like to think that eventually, she'll circle around to helping people and resisting vought however possible -- albeit on a smaller, more covert scale so she can continue living a peaceful life with elena.

[hughiecampbelle]

Being Annie's Younger Sibling Would Include:

Requested: Can I request some headcanons please for being Starlight's younger sibling? How their dynamic would evolve as the show goes on? - anon

A/N: I wasn't sure if the reader is a Supe or not like Annie, so I split in half depending on the way you'd want to imagine it :) I love this idea and I could go on forever! I'm re-watching the first season, so things might be a little sketchy between s1 and s4. Thank you for requesting! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💜💜

Being Annie's Younger Sibling As A Supe:

You and Annie were extremely close given that your mother pushed you two to be the best

From what you ate to who you hung out with to what you did with your free time was up to your controlling, domineering mother

You were so grateful for your big sister who gave you that kind of motherly unconditional love and support your own could not give you

Staying up late and talking in your shared room

"What are you gonna do when you join The Seven?"

"Make sure you're there with me."

Annie snuck you snacks that your mother decided was too sugary or bad, giving you her own just to see the smile on your face

Coming to her when you're having problems in school, with crushes, homework, and your Supe abilities

Because your mother is the way she is, she's constantly comparing you and Annie together. Who is stronger, faster, getting better grades, taking part in the most saves. etc.

Because she's older and has more experience, you have to work twice as hard to keep up with her. You don't hold this against Annie, though

She makes sure to tell you how good you're doing all the time and tells you how proud she is of you daily

Growing up, you and Annie would play The Seven and draw pictures of The Seven and what your suits would look like. It really was such a big dream of yours to be part of the team, to be a sibling duo too

Training together after school. You two take it very seriously, but when your mother isn't looking, you two goof off like regular kids and chase one another around shrieking and laughing

Playing dress up in your Maeve and Homelander costumes

Designing your costumes together

You both audition together, but only Annie gets the call. Though you're hurt you didn't make the cut, you're glad at least one of you got to live your dreams

Walking down the red carpet with Annie and your mom, feeling, for a moment, what it would be like to be part of the team

When it's time to leave, Annie promises she'll put in a good word for you. This is before she realizes who and what she'll be working with. Once she finds out, once she realizes, she regrets ever saying anything

To keep her in line, Homelander and Vought use you against her: they know you use the police scanner, they have the resources to fake a crime that ends up killing you (that is, if they want to be that discreet about it - Homelander is eager to laser you in half just for fun)

She keeps communication limited and her details sparse. She hates lying to you when you ask if it's everything you've dreamed of, but she can't tell you the truth. No one can know the truth

Instead she asks about what you're up to, if you've saved a stay cat from a tree or walked an old lady across a busy street

You know she's joking, but you can't help but feel like what you're doing compared to what she's doing is so small, so silly

Watching every interview and TV appearance she's in. Cheering her on!

Your mother purs all her focus into your career now. You can't do anything or go anywhere without her interrogating you

It's suffocating

By the time you're able to book a flight to see Annie (and escape your mother) she's deemed a traitor by The Seven

You show up anyway, demanding answers. She hasn't called you or texted. She hasn't been on TV. Annie's disappeared, and you're the only one who noticed. You're kicked out of Vought with even more questions and a terrible feeling

That's when you meet Hughie

Being Annie's Younger Sibling As A Non-Supe:

Growing up, you were kind of in the background, the shadows of your sisters success

Your mother put all her effort and dreams into Annie, creating a bit of resentment towards her and their relationship

Now that you're older, you know it wasn't love and affection that she was getting, rather it was pressure and constant critique

Sitting in the crowds of Annie's pageants, dragged along to events and celebrations for Supe kids, left to entertain yourself while your sister was doted on

Constantly hearing "Why can't you be more like your sister?"

Still, Annie did everything in her power to be the best big sister

She played with you and read to you and looked after you in school. She made sure no one messed with you or picked on you. As far as she was concerned, you might've been your mothers child, but you were her baby

Making your own Supe suit from dress up costumes and clothes you found around the house, pretending you too had powers

While your mother wouldn't entertain these ideas, Annie always called you whatever name you wanted, playing along with your "Supe powers"

When you two rough-housed she was always gentle with you, knowing she was so much stronger

You had to come up with your own dreams, your own ideas, since your mother wasn't projecting a future like she had with Annie

Going to college, getting a job, meeting someone, etc. Your milestones vs. your sisters seemed painfully average

Annie was excited for you, though. As silly as it might seem, she was, in a way, jealous. Where you saw average and boring, she saw safe and stable, a life uncontrolled by your mother

You're still in school when Annie gets the call about The Seven. You're overjoyed for her, but you can't help but think about how lonely it'll be here when it's just you and your mom

Annie was the glue holding your family together

You never miss an interview or appearance, everything she does and is part of is recorded so that you never forget this big moment for your family

Annie calls you once a week to fill you in on what's going on, leaving out the worst parts, both wanting to protect you from the truth and knowing she'll face consequences if she said anything

You're always sending her little things from back home: cards, pictures from your childhood, gift baskets, etc.

As far as you know, things are going great. She's living the dream your mother always had. Without her, you and your mom have little in common. She tries to take an interest in what you're doing, what you're studying, but for the most part she leaves you alone. You two have your own lives

You miss her a lot. Sleeping in your shared bedroom just isn't the same

You plan to fly out to see her between breaks in classes, but before then, she's deemed a traitor to The Seven. You call and text and even show up a Vought, demanding answers, but because you're not a Supe, you're not a member of the press, and you have no power, Homelander and Stormfront send you a way without answers

That's when you meet Hughie

Where The Two Lives Come Together:

He's heard all about you from Annie and gets your number from her just in case

When he realizes you're in the city, he makes his move, introducing himself as a friend with all the answers you could ever need

You're wary, but he shows you pictures and texts between him and Annie. If she liked him, if she trusted him, then so could you

He tries to ease you into the truth, but with Annie missing, you don't want to be lied to anymore. You're done being babied. You find out about everything: Compound V, and Homelander, and Vought, and everything

If you are a Supe, you feel this extra sense of fury towards your mother for poisoning you and your sister for her own gain

The Boys are wary of you: you seems down to earth and sweet, but naive. Even if you are a Supe, that still doesn't mean you're ready for this life. The constant danger, the harassment. They thought you should go back to Des Moines and let them handle it

Hughie sticks up for you, defending you, and eventually, you find your way on to the team, at least in Hughies good graces

When Annie gets out of Vought, defeats Stormfront, and wins her place back into The Seven, you take even more initiative with The Boys

You call your mother and tell her you won't be home for a while. She pries for more information, but you fear you've already given up too much

After Annie comes back to The Seven, her ratings are better than expected. You know it's safer for her to play along, even after Homelander announces they're in a relationship together

You try not to pry into her relationship, but you can't help but take sides: it's better this way, to "be" with Homelander. He can't hurt her if they're in a public relationship, at least not as much as he wants to

You and your sister argue about this (her safety) and yours. She doesn't want you anywhere near this kind of danger. She was trying to protect you from this, from Vought and Homelander

If you're not a Supe, you're more vulnerable

If you are a Supe, they know about you, your powers. They can figure out how to hurt you, kill you even

Regardless of abilities, she makes sure you don't let anyone know your real identity, making up a name for you to use with ID's and everything

She will do anything to protect you

Because you're so dedicated to one another, eventually The Boys realize maybe you're not so bad, maybe you have more to offer than they thought

When Hughie and Butcher get their hands on experimental V, you decide to take if you're not a Supe

Annie is furious at both you and Hughie. How could he let you take an experimental drug? How could he take it himself? She makes you both promise not to take it again, but both of you break that promise

You were always compared to your sister growing up, now you could be just like her, at least for a little while

After she publicly denounces her place at The Seven, she officially joins the team

Having her there with you feels like being back home, if you forget about everything else going on. Being with your sister, it reminds you what's important

Talking more to your mother, not necessarily being open, but talking nonetheless

"Mom, I'm fine. We're both fine."

She's furious Annie left The Seven and she blames you for her decision. Annie was always the perfect one, the better one. As far as she's concerned, you talked Annie out of it over jealousy and insecurity

Annie tries to stick up for you, but you know it's better if she gets it out of her system

Becoming fast friends with M.M. and eventually Kimiko

They both see what you're willing to do for your family, your sister, and there's a lot of merit in that

You're exceptionally close with Hughie. He sees you as a younger sibling too, someone to watch over and protect

Supe or not, Butcher still doesn't 100% like you, but the same can be said for any of them

Annie encourages you to keep up with your studies, to have that life you always wanted in the back of your mind, but you know, realistically, things will never be the same

Sending Hughie all of her most embarrassing pictures

In return, she tells him about your most embarrassing memories

It's not easy. It never will be. But when it's time to leave, you stick with your sister. If you're a Supe you get away with her, Hughie nodding at the both of you. If not, they take you with him. You beg her to go, get to safety, watching her abilities grow more powerful than ever before

[superlustersnew52]

open to any gender plot: other side of this one

Things had changed quite a bit over the last few months. Somebody that called herself Power Girl had just shown up one day, and had been fast-tracked into being made into a member of the Seven, apparently because she was just so much more powerful than anybody else in the world. Annie had quickly become friends with her...because, at first, she'd been equally offput by how brutal everybody else was.

But then Power Girl had started getting more brutal herself. And she'd been a bad influence on Annie, too... Power Girl had eventually grown tired of Homelander and had killed him...and convinced Annie to kill the Deep. Of course, Vought had covered them both up as terrible accidents...but Annie wasn't that sweet, innocent girl she used to be anymore.

Of course, when her and Power Girl had become the new leaders of the Seven, Billy had decided they needed to be taken out. The boys had stood no chance against Power Girl, though...

And then Power Girl went home, leaving Annie truly alone.

"Alright, let's get this over with," Annie sighed, as the other person walked into the room. She was the leader of the Seven now, and they were missing six members (A-Train had decided to just quit after finding out the others had been killed), that meant it was time for her to find new teammates, "I didn't bother to read your file, to be honest. What's your name? What are your powers? Are you any good in bed?"

Annie hoped she'd be able to convince Maeve to come back...but she would have to figure out how to help her get her powers back for that...

[bensbennies]

THOUGHTS ON THE BOYS SEASON 3 EPISODE 5!!!

KIMIKO SPOKE KIMIKO SPOKE KIMIKO SPOKE KIMIKO SPOKE

Butcher and Hughie: It’s interesting that after the V left Butcher’s system, he was shown to be concerned for Kimiko and to prioritize getting her stable over hunting Soldier Boy (even though we already know what he was planning from the moment in the van getaway when he thought back on what Soldier Boy did to Kimiko). Yet we don’t see the same concern from Hughie still. His focus instead goes immediately to trying to smooth things over with Annie and pretend the V isn’t a problem for him, that he doesn’t love it, that he wouldn’t take it again even if given the opportunity. Overall, Butcher seems more aware of the effects Temp V is having on himself and Hughie. Butcher already resigned himself early in the season though to sacrifice everything to protect Ryan, no matter what kind of person it turned him into. What he feels guilty about is leading Hughie down the same path.

I hope A-Train fucking kills Blue Hawk and this is actually a real wake up call for him of some sort. 

Hughie and Annie: The writers have been using Annie opening jars for Hughie as a metaphor for his feelings of powerless, but I think there’s another obvious angle here. Traditionally, women ask men to open jars that they can’t seem to open. The reversal in Hughie and Starlight’s relationship is also, I can’t help but feel, meant to symbolize that Hughie feels emasculated in his relationship with Annie... in other words, the writers are nodding toward this being another storyline about toxic masculinity. The thing is, I don’t think that the writers have established this as toxic masculinity yet outside of the jar metaphor. Hughie’s desire to have the power to protect people he loves, to not be a burden, and to save someone he cares about who is stuck in a horrible situation (and who has protected him over and over) is very... normal and not some kind of “toxic man” thing? It’s just a normal thing lots of people experience? In fact, at this juncture, Hughie’s storyline here comes across to me more like something typically written for a woman about taking back power. I do think the metaphor for toxic masculinity will end up being fulfilled, but in regards to how Hughie loses sight of Annie’s holistic well-being (just as he lost sight of Kimiko’s well-being) in his desire to protect her physically. More than ever, right now, she needs someone in her corner emotionally, and he’s keeping secrets and abandoning her.

FRENCHIE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHY didn’t you tell The Boys Little Nina was after you????

We know Soldier Boy is meant to represent toxic masculinity, but also note that he is literally toxic. He is literally radioactive and being anywhere near him poses serious health risks!! This bodes very poorly for Hughie and Butcher and Soldier Boy’s potential impact on them. In other words, the toxic masculinity might start rubbing off on them and poisoning them too as they spend more and more time with him.

Butcher and Maeve: Butcher hooking up with Maeve sealed the fact that Butcher would “get in bed with” Soldier Boy (I mean this metaphorically lol). Butcher hates supes, he tells Maeve they should all be killed while simultaneously beginning to describe how supes are just like anyone else—just like him, now that he’s crossed this line by taking V. Maeve isn’t evil, but we know this isn’t something Butcher wouldn’t normally do because of his prejudices against supes, so for him to cross that line, shows how he sees the line between himself and supes blurring to nothing while simultaneously believing there is nothing he can’t or shouldn’t do to get Homelander... This is a bad combination.

I was super surprised when Butcher drugged MM!!! At first I thought MM was being effected by Soldier Boy’s radioactivity as he approached or having a panic attack lol. MM is going to be SO FUCKING ANGRY and he has every right to be. Looking at that one clip from the trailer with Starlight attacking Soldier Boy while MM is behind her? I’m wondering if Starlight and MM will team up to try and hunt down Butcher, Hughie, and Soldier Boy and separate their friends Soldier Boy. 

You know Homelander... I graduated in business and I didn’t know what EBITDA was either lol. But this revealed Homelander’s insecurities about leadership so succinctly. He really wasn’t even being questioned, but he immediately perceived it as a threat because it revealed his ineptitude, especially after he’s probably been sitting with what Edgar told him last episode. He doesn’t even know the “supe terrorist” is Soldier Boy sitting there with the power to take his power and he’s already freaking out. It’s only going to get worse. 

Still not ready for Herogasm. o_O

[anxiouspotatorants]

Oh god I think I need an actual thought compilation for this episode (3.05):

Anika got at least one episode again!!! I love that she was actually used as the pov character for all the stupid beurocratic choices The Deep and Homelander are making as new leaders of Vought.

I am kind of surprised the Maeve and Butcher interaction happened before her meeting any of the other Boys again, but as soon as the scene started I was surprised at my surprised. They are self destructive self loathing violent jackasses with alcohol issues, like of course they would poke at each other’s wounds and then hook up just because they felt like it.

MM really is the heart of this season and I need him to get some catharsis or kind of win in the end because the first half has been rough.

Speaking of moral compasses of the show I keep getting surprised over how much I love Annie and Hughie and their relationship. I genuinely squealed when Annie said she didn’t need him to save her she needed him ;-;. Also the angst the angst

Where is Maggie/Maeve. I need to know she’s okay or comes back swinging in the finale where is she she can’t die of screen please don’t kill her off now her character has so much to do where is she where is she where is she where is she-

I’m genuinely starting to think Nathan is the key to A-Train’s redemption because he seems like the one person that can genuinely call him out while inspiring Reggie to do better. Like, it is hard to bring that boy back after not just Robin and Popclaw but now Supersonic (I miss him already ;-;), but Nathan and this plotline might just do it. Or at least start it

If you think I have forgotten about Frenchie and Kimiko you are sorely mistaken. Shit, they deserve their whole compilation of thoughts. Like is Kimiko permanently powerless now? Or is it temporary? Will she have to start using temp V with the rest of the team?

As a musical lover that scene just brought me so much joy. It was just so energetic and happy and happened in a way that makes sense for the show and for musicals (when your feelings are too strong to say you sing them etc.). I just know I’m going to rewatch that scene ten thousand times.

«I have mon coeur.» That’s it, that’s the line replaying in my head now.

She kissed him!! It was an actual consented soft kiss! And they were both so giddy and adorable after it! We’re officially free of the disaster kiss from season two!

Nina is a terrifying side villain and I am here for it. I do hope Kimiko having to go save him solves itself in the next episode though because I can’t take all the angst coming at me by the end of this episode

Okay but if nobody has then somebody has to make a post about the contrast between Maeve x Homelander/ Soldier Boy x Crimson Countess and Kimiko x Frenchie/ Annie x Hughie. Something about honest love and saving each other because there is so much there.

My one critique of this episode is not enough Black Noir. (Also just to note on an earlier episode his backstory holy shit I did not expect him to actually grow past scary comic relief ninja he had an actual name and personality and feelings and he might still have them oh my god-)

[bitchybutcher]

Texts I sent a friend the first time I watched The Boys, Season 1:

-        HERE WE GOOOOOOO

-        Butcher has said approximately 5 words

-        I’m already dead

-        I should not be this turned on by such a fuckin maniac

-        Oh ok so Homelander digs a mommy domme

-        Ok no but Annie needs a hug. She needs to be protected at all costs

-        Why is Hughie only hot covered in blood?

-        Deep needs to choke on a bag of dicks but also he’s an insecure baby who wants to feel important

-        I love Frenchie. I have nothing else to say about him I just love him

-        Butcher needs to stop saying things. Every time he opens his gob the fanny flutters get worse

-        I like this Mister Milk guy

-        Oh ffs Homelander is legit jealous of a baby

-        This subby bastard needs to go on fetlife or the femdom subreddit and get himself an actual mommy domme

-        Poor Hughie in the middle of this domestic between Frenchie and the Milk guy

-        FUCK Butchers chest looks good in this episodes shirt

-        Frenchie you perv no of course no cameras in toilets

-        OH his name is Mothers Milk not Mister Milk

-        The Maeve actress looks really familiar imma have to google to find out what else I’ve seen her in

-        Ohhhh Homelander is insane insane

-        I mean he’s pretty, and he’s hilarious, but WOW

-        He’s a lil off on the crazy/hot scale

-        WHY ARE THEY WATCHING ATRAIN GET HIS TOES SUCKED

-        WHY ARE THEY WATCHING

-        Ohhhh no Atrain is a using BASTARD GIRL BEAT HIS ASS

-        Welp imma be listening to Butcher say “we’ve gotta get some” on a loop for days

-        Maeve is so sick of Homelanders shit

-        Yup I’m shipping Hughie and Annie hard. They’re so adorable and they both really just need a hug

-        WHY DO THEY KEEP WATCHING THIS DRUG WOMAN DOING SEX THINGS

-        Well episode 4 is officially my favourite:

He said my name

He sleeps nude

BUTCHER BUM

-        Oh ok so Deep is actually just a soft baby

-        He’s in therapy omg

-        He needs a hug

-        HIS NAME IS KEVIN

-        And he loves dolphins and he’s lonely oh man why am I feeling bad for this douche he assaulted Annie

-        Hughies phone beeps and immediately the guys are like “he got texted by a girl, look at his face, has to be”

-        Oh Frenchie is a subby boi too apparently

-        WHY ARE THERE SO MANY SUBBIES IN THIS SHOW I WANNA HUG THEM ALL

-        Kevin and his soft spot for dolphins is melting my heart this kid just wants to do good things and he really needs a cuddle

-        They’re on a bowling date oh my god they’re too precious

-        KEVIN STOLE A DOLPHIN IN A VAN

-        KEVIN IS HAVING A BREAKDOWN AND ALSO GETTING ARRESTED

-        Oh dude I’m such a slut for Butcher this isn’t even funny

-        Homelander is insane and I adore that but also I’m LIVING for Maeve’s facial expressions when he’s on his bullshit

-        Frenchie is such a sweetheart with his lil home cooked meal and setting her cutlery properly

-        I feel bad for the female

-        Why does Hughie only have one jacket

-        Oh boy the Jesus nutters festival

-        Ngl the stretch Armstrong fella is kinda attractive

-        “You’ve done a murder, comparatively speaking, blackmail is a piece of cake”

-        Girl help I’m in love with a fictional unhinged angel muffin

-        I WANNA KNOW WHO’S BEHIND THE FLY THAT KEEPS BUZZING AROUND THEM TOO CLOSELY

-        Shapeshifter? Some kind of Antman type person??

-        More importantly how do I find a genie to make Butcher real cause no joke I love him

-        Oop Toni’s kiwi accent slipped out when he said mayonnaise

-        Homelander is the neediest little subby bitch boi I swear to fuckin god

-        HUGHIE WITH THE GAY BLACKMAIL

-        Ooooo something shady with Becca…tenner bets it’s something to do with Homelander somehow

-        OH SHIT IS MAEVE A LESBIAN

-        Ok so I adore Kevin the Deep. He’s comfort eating junk food and looks like he’s been crying cause of the dolphin

-        Aww Annie standing up for herself

-        OH NO SHE’S CALLING OUT SAD KEVIN THE DOLPHIN SQUASHER

-        Oh wait no ok she didn’t actually say who it was

-        I don’t know why I feel protective over Sad Kevin but he’s so sad and he’s so bad at doing good but he’s trying and dear lord he needs a cuddle

-        Hughie clapping Annie after she basically told them all to fuck off  😂

-        THEY’RE TURNING BABIES INTO SUPERS

-        LASER EYE BABY

-        ANNIE AND HUGHIE FINALLY GOT TO HUG

-        Butcher just weaponised a baby. What. Like it was a little gun

-        Homelander is NOT getting horny cause Stillwell called him a bad boy and started mommying him OMFG

-        And now she’s calling him her good boy with her shirt open

-        Subby boi and his mommy domme I FUCKING CALLED IT FROM THEIR FIRST SCENE

-        CRAZY SILENT LADY IS A WOLVERINE WHAT

-        Bitch got gutted then just like eh no big lemme just knit my internal organs back together

-        YES ANNIE TELL STILLWELL WHERE TO STICK HER SHIT

-        Awww Kevin tryna do good again he’s so cute

-        A DUDE GOT HIS DICK FROZEN OFF WHAT THE FUCK

-        Kevin is so bad on camera oh dear

-        He’s trying to apologise and he’s so bad at this

-        Who and what the fuck is Black Noir

-        IT’S THE I SEE DEAD PEOPLE GUY. HE’S THE MIND READER PERSON THAT’S AMAZING

-        Awwwwwww lil baby Homelander

-        They need to stop making me feel fuzzy over dickheads

-        Kimiko trusts Frenchie this is precious

-        Jamming out to the end credits song is one of the best parts tbh, the soundtrack is boss

-        I feel so bad for Kevin

-        He’s been exiled to Ohio and he’s sad

-        They didn’t even give him a plushie dolphin to cuddle

-        I’m rooting so hard for Hughie and Annie, this had better work out for them

-        WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING TO KEVIN

-        GILLS AREN’T FOR FINGERING

-        Oh what I’d give to have Butcher stalking menacingly after me in a train station

-        Sixth sense guy doesn’t know how lucky he is getting cornered in a bathroom stall by the hottest psychopath on tv

-        Yeah I’d let him smash me on a sink any day

-        Oh no not more Sad Kevin

-        Traumatised baby needs someone to mind him

-        BUTCHER SHOT ANNIE?!?!?!?

-        Oh god Homelander in Syria this can’t be good

-        BOBBY FROM SUPERNATURAL????

-        Aaaaaand more Sad Kevin

-        Yeah I shouldn’t be surprised that he’s doing the full breakdown shave

-        Oh no sad Annie

-        Atrain is gonna do himself an injury

-        Black Noir is hilarious even though they don’t say anything and have no face

-        Soooo he admits to creating supervillains behind her back, and she tops him? As reward??

-        This bish does remember what happened to Becca, right? Demon spawn clawing out of her

-        Frenchie and MM bonding in captivity 🥰

-        Ooooh conflicting stories re Homelanders baby

-        Not Hughie going in all badass and immediately getting creamed 😂

-        The retainer! Hughie is a genius

-        I mean he’s a dumbass

-        But so smart

-        Hughie: *firing machine gun* I’M SORRY I’M SO SORRY

-        YES ANNIE!!

-        SAVE YOUR SOFT DUMB DUMB BOYFRIEND AND HIS BUDDIES

-        Uh oh

-        Roided up Atrain

-        Oop heart attack

-        Oh fuck he melted her face

-        OH SHIIIIIIT

-        Butchers hurt little face nooo

-        Oh ok season 1 is over

-        …it’s 5am

-        Aaaaand I can see daylight

-        I’m very tempted to just pull an all-nighter and watch season 2

-        But bed also sounds nice

-        I think bed

-        Dream of Butcher

[anunvalidcritic]

The Boys: SN2.7

(DISCLAIMER: MY OPINION IS MY OWN AND CAN BE DEEMED INVALID TO THOSE WHO DON’T CARE FOR IT.) 

Sorry for the delay but I’ve been really busy with work and I haven’t gotten much sleep due to this but nonetheless I was able to finish it and upload the commentary.

               BUTCHER, BAKER, CANDLESTICK MAKER

(Photo Credit: @01091006)

Alright we’ve got ourselves a grown ass man whose clearly obsessed with STORMFRONT

Ik he’s gettin’ tired of seeing/doing the same shit over and over again

Maybe he’s one of the meme makers

Yep called that shit again

He better not become some fucking murder... smdh

“Congress?? Please what a bunch of corrupt cunts they are.” - BUTCHER

(this line hit a little too close to home iykyk)

This congresswoman looks familiar... I can’t put my finger on it though

Alright so whose that ringing BUTCHER’s line?? (That’s a long ass number too)

“Mom I don’t want a fucking unicorn frappe.” - ANNIE

Bro wtf?!!!!!

“And Serge... no abandoning your post this time.” - MALLORY

rip to BUTCHER’s father

BLACK NOIR didn’t have to go in on ANNIE like that

ICONIC DIALOGUE

LAMPLIGHTER - “Okay. Different strokes, man.”

HUGHIE - “Please don’t say that in this context.”

“You know this isn’t healthy, man. Y-You can’t watch porn while the... sun’s out.”- HUGHIE

LAMPLIGHTER = ARSONIST

I like how HUGHIE said “nevermind” just to continue with his story.

LOL THAT TRANSITION BETWEEN HOMELANDER TALKING ABOUT ANNIE AND HUGHIE LOOKING AT THE SCREEN IS PURE GOLD

“Come on do you want me to cuck? Or be the guy who fucks the wife?” - HUGHIE

“Yeah, come on. Let’s go fuck the wife. Con-sensually.” - HUGHIE

You know I never truly understood why the nickname “Billy” went with the name William.

ICONIC DIALOGUE

SAM - “What, no hug?”

BUTCHER - “You step one inch closer, and I’ll kill you quicker than that fucking arse cancer.”

SAM - “I bet you would.”

ROFL The way he slapped his finger away

Beating the shit out of your kids does not equal “tough love”

Sooo.... LENNY committed suicide...

Wow, well I’ll be damned tha nazi bitch has a heart

I haven’t seen MAEVE use her powers in a minute!! That poor table.

Wait why is DR. VOGELBAUM in a wheelchair??? Ig HOMELANDER really did fuck his ass up.

Wow I really forgot M.M’s gov name is MARVIN.

FRENCHIE reminiscin’ -- You know i still remember when FRENCHIE said his dad smothered him with a hello kitty duvet lol

Watch me fuck around and learn KIMIKO’s sign language

Fish Bowl = Fixing Grievances

Bruh this whole church is toxic

“And boom, bitchies!” - LAMPLIGHTER

“Your America’s second favorite lesbian couple, after all.” - ASHLEY

Whose the first?... Ellen and Portia??

“Ashley for once in your life be a fucking human being.” - MAEVE

Their watching a lego movie of the Blindside

... I think we all know HOMELANDER is lying to BECCA. He’s gonna snatch that little boy up in the middle of the night.

BUTCHER a whole maniac

Why do I feel like LAMPLIGHTER is gonna step HUGHIE up...

👀...

HUGHIE RUN!!!

My mouth is really ajar looking at this hand scene

She’s walking a little too slow for me... I foresaw that shit!

BLACK NOIR is strong af! Jesus he’s throwing her around like a dog that vigorously shakes its head with a toy in its mouth.

STARLIGHT bro I’m gonna need you to get the fuck up! Don’t let this dude choke you out!

... once again... fuck almond joy’s

Y’all can do this reunion shit later. GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE BUILDING!

ICONIC DIALOGUE

M. M. - “Kid, you are fucking unbelievable. All you had to do was watch porn.”

HUGHIE - “I didn’t know he was gonna set himself on fire?!?.”

I think we all knew this church for supes was all kinds of fucked up. But this whole scenario of EAGLE hunting his partner dressed up as a deer is on the stranger side to things. 

Why tf did ANNIE’s mom look at KIMIKO like that?!?!

HOMELANDER lookin’ sick af!

BRUH IS THAT FUCKING CINDY!!!!????

“Oh, shit.” - THE DEEP

_______________

episode 6 here. Once again I’m sorry for the delay in the post. I’ll have to figure out my timing better. But on a lighter note... EPISODE 8 WILL BE THE LAST FOR THE SEASON!!! We already know it got confirmed for a season 3 so this last episode better fucking bring it!

[abigailnussbaum]

The Boys 5x06, “The Bloody Doors Off”

I’m generally quite positive about this episode, but before I get to that, this really needs to be said: the trope of “doors open at the asylum, murder and mayhem ensue” is really poisonous to the mentally ill, and should have been discarded a long time ago. It’s particularly common in superhero stories, which are, after all, very fond of the setting of a superhero asylum. Off the top of my head, both The Gifted and Batwoman have employed it in the last two years. Which means that even as it’s patting itself on the back for skewering the tropes of superhero stories, The Boys is indulging in a particularly vile one. And while we’re on the subject of things this episode should have been above: that joke about transgender strippers. It’s not as bad as it could have been, because the gag isn’t “she’s got a penis!” (and MM’s response is immediately “I don’t care for strippers regardless of their genitalia”). But it’s still fetishizing the trans body - which, I suppose, is hardly surprising given the show’s generally judgmental attitude towards kink.

That being said, this is probably the best episode of the season, largely because it plays to the show’s strengths: tight thematic and plot coherence (finally justifying the decision to move the show to a weekly format after weeks of shapeless installments), strong characterization, and a willingness to complicate seemingly black and white situations that belies the show’s reputation as an outrage machine. So yes, this is an episode that features Homelander crushing a man’s skull while in the throes of passion (apparently we need to have at least one of those per season), not to mention a man with a giant, prehensile penis. But it’s also an episode that deepens our understanding of Frenchie, introduces us to a new character who is almost instantly compelling (while also complicating that reaction significantly), and forces us to reexamine our feelings towards Maeve without telling us anything new about her.

The common theme running through the episode is the things you’ll do for the people you love, how you live with the consequences of those choices, and what they make of you. We finally get to meet Lamplighter, the boogeyman whose murder of Mallory’s grandchildren broke the Boys apart years ago and has hung over Frenchie in particular. And we find out why that is - Frenchie was supposed to be keeping an eye on Lamplighter, whom Mallory had just recruited to her investigation of Homelander, and left his post to tend to a friend who was ODing.

Shawn Ashmore is inspired casting for Lamplighter. He’s got the sort of look that can just as easily convey sympathetic concern as selfish entitlement, and slide between the two with ease. Which makes Lamplighter both less hatable than we might have expected, given what we know of him, but also hard to trust. (To be fair, I’m reading a lot of Johnny Jaqobis into the performance, and that was Aaron, not Shawn; but honestly, those two are surprisingly similar for how solid both of their careers have turned out.) But the episode really belongs to Frenchie, who not only takes on Lamplighter’s admission that he didn’t know Mallory’s grandchildren were in the room he set on fire, but finds enough common ground with the man to confess his own part in that night’s disaster. When Lamplighter asks “did [your friend] live?”, it’s a moment of human connection that we don’t often see between the Boys and their quarry (and leads to Frenchie’s heartbreaking revelation that Jay lived, only to die of another overdose shortly after). The episode ends with Frenchie begging for Lamplighter’s life from Mallory (and also trying to make peace with Kimiko, who is otherwise sorely underused).

At the same time, the episode doesn’t encourage us to feel uncomplicated sympathy towards Lamplighter. As MM points out “I meant to murder an innocent woman, not her grandchildren” is hardly a defense. And even more disturbing is Lamplighter’s repeated refrain to Frenchie, “why didn’t you stop me?” Whereas Frenchie doesn’t want to be let off the hook even though he had a good reason for abandoning his assignment, Lamplighter is looking for someone else to blame for his own actions, even to the perverse extreme of blaming an opponent for not fighting back. And, as we see in the present, he’s still killing innocents, burning experiment subjects who don’t pan out or refuse to play along, while claiming that he’s being forced.

Which ties into Maeve, who for the first time is called to account for her part in the plane crash last season. Maeve sees the video of the crash as indicting Homelander, which is also how we’ve been trained to think about it. But when Elena watches it, she sees a woman she’s been taught to think of as heroic abandoning others to save her own life, begging fruitlessly for mercy but finally just saving her own skin. Like Lamplighter - and more importantly, like Annie earlier in this season, when she was about to kill Hughie at Homelander’s command - Maeve might reasonably say that she didn’t have a choice. But she still did those things, and hid them. Her final line to Elena - “why are you looking at me that way?” - sums up the episode’s core message.

It’s a message that is also echoed in the Annie-Billy-Hughie storyline, though it’s a bit more wobbly in that context. The idea of having Annie and Billy bond over their shared love of Hughie is a solid storytelling beat, but I’m not quite sure what to make of Annie’s “he’s too good for either of us”. Annie kills the driver to save Hughie, and the show doesn’t let her off the hook for that (her long look at the baby seat in the car once she gets in). But it’s still a choice she made in order to save someone. Hughie killed Translucent for no reason at all - or really, because he wanted to feel strong and powerful after weeks of stewing in grief and rage over Robin’s death (and Annie, though she knows the Boys were responsible for Translucent’s death, still doesn’t know that Hughie is the one who pushed the button). I’m not sure he’s too good for anyone. 

(Meanwhile, the fact that Annie was on the verge of killing Hughie to save her own life just a few episode ago seems to have been memory-holed, even though it would have been a really obvious thing for Billy to throw in her face during their fight early in the episode.)

The other big thing that happens in this episode is that we find out Stormfront’s background, and between what she says to Homelander and what Lamplighter reveals to the Boys, it seems clear that her plan is to create a superpowered neo-Nazi army and use it to take over the world. It’s good to finally have some answers (and I admit that this is a more interesting turn of plot than the one I anticipated last week, a false flag terrorist attack). But I also feel that the show is in danger of outthinking itself. Having Vought be a company with roots in Nazi Germany was a clever touch earlier this season, but making Stormfront a German Nazi herself - and making the entire genesis of superheroes a Nazi project - undercuts a lot of what the show has been saying about American racism and how much its superheroes are rooted in it. Suddenly we’re back to that familiar trope, invasion by an army of foreign and foreign-inspired Nazis. It’s not unlike the way that Winter Soldier whiffed its central revelation, choosing to focus on a fifth column of hidden traitors instead of admitting the more terrifying truth, that after seventy years there’s really no way to disentangle “good” SHIELD from “evil” Hydra, because the former has been hopelessly corrupted by the latter.

When I wrote about last week’s episode, I praised it for skewering rainbow capitalism in its depiction of Vought’s plans to “sell” Maeve’s queerness and her relationship with Elena. Since then, several people have pointed out that The Boys was speeding well ahead of the actual industry it’s lampooning - in a blockbuster market dominated by superhero movies, there are currently no queer superhero characters (though there are several on TV). Which means that the show’s satire can end up missing its mark - instead of pointing out how capitalism squeezes everything good into an easily-digested, marketable form, one can easily read this subplot as saying that a gay superhero would be bad, full stop. 

I think a similar dynamic is at play when it comes to Stormfront’s secret plot. An army of superpowered neo-Nazis is scary, but is it really scarier than the President of the United States not only refusing to condemn white supremacists on stage at a national debate, but addressing them directly in terms that can only be taken as an instruction to riot if he loses the election? Is it scarier than videos of police that repeatedly show their sympathy towards white supremacist, to the point of standing by when one of them fires into a crowd of people? It doesn’t take superpowers for fascism to take hold - it didn’t in Nazi Germany, and it doesn’t today. By pretending otherwise, The Boys is neutering its social commentary exactly where it should be most trenchant.

[cyclone-rachel]

living proof that the camera’s lying || a The Boys fic

AO3 link

~

“You know that was bullshit, right?”

Those are Maeve’s first words to Annie, after the two of them leave the stage- once Maeve confirms that Homelander is nowhere to be found, and the press has left.

“What part?” Annie asks, because she does want to know, and if she were sitting on her couch back home, watching Homelander give a speech about a year ago, she wouldn’t have wondered at all.

Maeve stops short of rolling her eyes, as she looks at her.

“First of all, the “thanks to our heroism” bit. Stormfront definitely didn’t look neutralized after we kicked her ass, and…”

She trails off, hand absently going up and down her arm again as she looks at the floor. Annie doesn’t say anything- especially because this is the first time Maeve’s talked about what happened there, in that field. The three of them, her and Maeve and Kimiko, doing their best to make sure Stormfront went down, and stayed there- after her reputation was ruined beyond repair, of course. They hadn’t talked about that, either, or who could’ve released the information.

But if Annie knew anything about Maeve, she would guess that that was one of the only things she’d done during her career in the Seven that had been genuinely heroic- not because the cameras were watching, not for anyone other than herself. And Annie knew from experience, that it was satisfying… even for someone who didn’t see themselves as heroic anymore.

(It could’ve also just been because she, like most people, had standards- as shitty as everything was, and most people in their lives were, some people were almost universally agreed-on as evil. That was why A-Train had given her and Hughie the file she needed to expose Stormfront and take her down, after all, and after Maeve’s response when they’d asked her to help before, it would make sense for Annie to assume she was the same.

She didn’t know for sure, though, so until Maeve told her, she’d continue not being sure of her motives.

Even if there was still a small part of her that wanted to believe the best.)

“Yeah, I know.” Annie says. She isn’t sure what happened after the fight, but when Maeve had met her back at Vought Tower, she was clutching her phone so hard she could have broken it, and Homelander arrived later still, refusing to look either of them in the eyes until they had to look like a unified team for the cameras.

(Although, as she was sure people would point out, they were still a few members short of the roster their team name would indicate, and they’d have to start looking for new people soon.

But these things happened, and once they hired the next members of the Seven, they couldn’t get any worse than the last one who’d joined.

Probably.)

“And I’m sure Homelander only called us heroes because he had to. If he had his way, anyone who threatened his spotlight would be removed, and he’d be the only Supe left in the world.”

Maeve shakes her head.

“If he had his way, he’d remove everyone himself.” She corrects. “Every Supe, and your friends. As long as everyone else loved him, it would be worth it.”

“So you’re telling me to be careful?”

“You didn’t hear it from me.” Maeve answers. “But, yeah. Especially in private.”

“I could say the same to you.” Annie tells her, and instantly regrets it- Maeve looks more distant, suddenly, tensing up. She wants to comfort her, but knows that Maeve would refuse, and so settles for continuing the conversation.

“I’m not the one he accused of sabotage and conspiracy.” Maeve says. “Even though he said you’re cleared from it; he’s not going to forget.”

Annie knows that- if she was kicked out at this point, she’d be worse-off than The Deep. She wouldn’t even deserve being exiled to some middle-of-nowhere city, doing a few public appearances and wasting time in a motel in the hopes that someday, she’d be good enough for the Seven to take her back. At that point, not even the Church of the Collective would take her. She only escaped the first time because she got lucky- enough to have a very resourceful maybe-boyfriend, teaming up with another traitor who killed himself right before she was able to set herself free.

If it happened to her again… maybe she would end up like Stormfront, with Homelander on TV talking about how she violated the Seven’s trust, and how that was unacceptable.

Stormfront deserved it, though. Of course she did- and even though Homelander preached about how terrible she was in public, Annie had still seen them together, and heard them in bed. He could talk all he liked, but- just as Maeve said- he was full of bullshit, and if she wanted to make sure people saw that, she couldn’t accomplish that alone.

It would take a while, and it might end badly for everyone in the crossfire- including Butcher, and Hughie, and her and Maeve and Elena and the rest of their friends- but Stormfront’s capture would hopefully lead to people questioning Vought, and maybe someday, they’d become trapped in a lie that they couldn’t buy themselves out of.

“I’ll watch your back if you watch mine.” Annie says, finally.

Maeve snorts.

“You sure about that?” she asks.

“I know I can’t ask anyone else here.” Annie decides- even though she’s known for a while now that if she had to go to anyone in the Seven, had to trust one of them, it would be her. “Do either of us have a choice?”

She holds out her hand, and Maeve hesitates, before shaking it.

“We’re sure as hell not asking Homelander.” She says.

“Yeah.” Annie answers.

Maeve steps away, a hand again on her arm.

“And we’re not talking about this with anyone. Got it?”

She looks around like she expects the head-exploding Supe to appear and do their thing, and maybe she’s right to be cautious. Of course she is- so is Annie, for that matter.

But for right now, she feels just a little bit safer, and hopes that Maeve does too.

[candycanesuckers]

Genuine question and not trying to start anything, but what are your opinions on the other members of the Seven?? You’ve shown your thoughts on Homelander and Stormfront extensively (which I don’t agree with you on the Stormfront front, but I’m gonna be respectful here), but I’ve seen you call Maeve and Starlight “pushovers” and A-Train a “junkie” and a “lowlife”, so I’m genuinely curious. Also, just a quick side note, The Deep as a character interests me. I don’t sympathize with him, and I never will because he’s a rapist and all, but I’m curious about what you think of his steps towards redemption? Thank you in advance

I think they’re all incredibly well-written (with the exception of Black Noir; he seems to be there just for a running gag and to raise tension when needed, which I just do not care for. He makes some entertaining scenes though). I really like how the show makes it a point to say that no one on The Seven -- or in general, really -- are good people, but rather just varying degrees of bad (with the exception of Starlight; she really is just a good person, which is rather boring to me). 

The only character I do truly dislike is Homelander. All characters have traits that I dislike -- like I’ve said, Starlight and Maeve are pushovers. Starlight just takes what she’s given with very little pushback, and Maeve is too comfortable to live in discomfort. But I do like a lot about those two as well; I find Maeve to be incredibly sympathetic (I only took an issue with her in season two, when it was revealed that she had the recording of the man from the plane. There was no reason for her not to use it against Homelander sooner), and I find Annie’s sense of morality rather noble.

I’m indifferent towards A-Train and The Deep. With A-Train, I find his storyline rather bland -- the only thing unique about it is that he’s a superhero addicted to a substance for superheroes. But the way he reacts to his addiction and the way his addiction affects his surroundings is something that’s just very common. It’s a common depiction of an addict, which I personally feel like it shouldn’t be since he’s a superhero. It should be heightened. With The Deep, I’m more conflicted about him.

His depiction in the first episode is completely separate from the rest of the series. He’s actively threatening in the first episode, while in the rest of the series he’s rather air-headed. I don’t know whether he actually knows what consent is, or if he just had a disregard for it. He’s going through a redemption arc but in my mind, he’s still just a rapist, it’s just that he’s now also a dumb rapist. I can’t sympathize with him because the viewers still don’t understand the severity of his actions (it was mentioned in season one that what he did to Annie, he probably did to other women as well. We have no idea how many other women, we don’t know if it was in the same context, we don’t know if he actually regrets those times, etc.).

[ofshampain]

ANTIGONE “ANNIE” RÓISÍN MAEVE FINNEGAN LAZZARO: AN INTRODUCTION

{ hayley atwell, 39, cis female, she/her } hey, antigone “annie” finnegan lazzaro? good to see you, with all the insanity going on! still working at pinehaven theatre as the artistic director? that’s good. i mean, you’ve been around thirty-nine years, what do you make of this insanity? hey, i heard that people have been saying that you’re into re-reading the books you learned about at school to see if they’re more lovable when you’re not being forced, sculpting the world’s most magnificent sandcastle with your child with a free smile on your lips & making a family for your daughter between stage-hands and actors. you also remind people of the lipstick that almost convinces you your life’s together, the strong desire to finally do something yourself without the help of others, an annotated copy of the theatre’s next play, work-glasses set atop the open pages with a half-finished cold coffee, and pathetic fallacy, which i like. well, stay safe out there and remember to listen to the fog warnings.

TWs: ( amicable ) divorce, referenced parental emotional / physical abuse, depression

antigone isn’t her birth name: she was born aisling ( ash-ling. ) if you ask why she changed it, she’ll tell you it was to stick it to equity: ‘try telling me that’s a name an actor already has,’ with all the anger in her chest ( it wasn’t much; it never has been ) but really, she had to get away from the child who lived in that house with their father. and if you know where to look, the theme of punishment for defending family & particularly the character of creon, it’s almost heartbreaking that that is where — of all the choices she could’ve made — she decided to go: especially when you consider that the character of antigone, in her determined defiance, is an aspiration for annie rather than a reflection. she’s more of an ismene, but she wants to be better. but most people do call her annie, and thus they miss the greek tragedy she was named after.

she truly has all the love in the world. for everyone but herself, that is. she’s never quite mastered the concept of self-love, perhaps because any notion of it was crushed by their father. but she’s very maternal, because she doesn’t want anyone who might need it to go without what rory did for her: if you’re having a rough day, she’ll happily have you over, make you food, and you can vent. backstage at the theatre can oftentimes be a support group — but if you talk to her, you can count on her confidence.

that being said, she’s never gone to actual therapy herself and probably never will, because to her that would mean doing the unthinkable: conceding that she is not, in fact, fine. if she can keep the number of people who see her with tear-stained cheeks in a given week to rory and just about nobody else — especially not her daughter sophia — she thinks she’s got it made.

yeah, she’s definitely got depression.

antigone married sebastian lazzaro, who she met while she was studying literature & drama at the university of maine. it was almost fairytale, how head-over-heels they were. until it wasn’t, of course, but they were happy first. dated for five years, married twelve, and have their little sunshine: twelve year old sophia. 

sophia was raised at the pinehaven theatre, annie’s project, and she’s still the artistic director there to this day. but there was always space for sophia in annie’s work, and though she knew it was hard for bash, he could’ve made more of an effort to manage his time.

annie divorced him — bash, to her — not because she didn’t love him. it wasn’t even truly for herself. it made sense to her and to the little voice in her head that she would be... insufficient. it was the fact that her husband’s timetable didn’t make time for their child that really pushed her over the edge. she could see sophia’s hope that her father would be home, that he’d tell her stories from work ( he couldn’t ) being continually crushed. she knew he wasn’t bad, knew his heart was in the right place ( she’s certainly got perspective on bad fathers ) but sophia needed something stable, and it had quickly become apparent to annie that the only way their daughter was going to get that was via a custody arrangement that she could legally hold him to. 

she both regrets it, and doesn’t. because after all, it got her what she aimed for: stability for sophia. the only remaining sign of her regret — that she didn’t want it for herself — is that she’s never gotten rid of her last name.

champion cookie maker. if you���ve had a rough day, you’re going to have an annie finnegan lazarro giving you cookies. after all, i don’t make the rules. that’s just the way that she is.

5′8″ literature & theatre nerd who spends too long putting her face on in the morning. the annie behind the lipstick and the rest of it is more... tired. you can just see more of her, and that doesn’t fit her goal of seeming okay. she listens to anything & everything, she’s got quite the eclectic spread, so it’s quite likely really that her choice reflects her mood. you just have to know where to look for it. ( her favourite musical is six, in case anyone was wondering. it’s her dream to find a way to put it on in pinehaven, but in the current climate, it seems a little blasé. )

she lives in the house that bash bought for her. she works in the theatre someone helped her set up. and the theme continues — annie wants nothing than to be able to stand up and say i did it myself. annie has a sensitive heart, so that often means people feel protective of her, or like they need to be. 

her theme is she used to be mine from waitress thank you for coming to my ted talk. her song for when she’s not coping but trying to: happiness happening by lost witness. amsterdam by daughter is my angsty song for days and... yeah, it fits her too. ‘by the morning i will have grown back.’

enfj-t. hufflepuff.

[tanoraqui]

Oh dear Octover Daye musical sounds wonderful! How would Simon and Sylvester duet sound like? Or Sylvester and Luna that starts off as romantic fairy tale but slowly turns in Luna s hearfelt but villainesque song about how she will do anything to keep her family. Luidaeg takes breaks in between songs to complain but she is grinning whole time. Pete singing shanties! And Amandine could get reverse of hero's songs, where she sings about her duty and everything they all expected and -cont

And importance of her duty and why she chose NOT to be hero “ Done being vessel of your hopes, done being your sacrifice for better tomorrow, Daddy is hero and i wont be his ticket home, find your own hope chest” luidaeg is complaining in between songs but smiling. And Eira? She doesnt sing. In fact all music stops with her

Thanks a lot, take all time you need! Also another musical idea- a song duel between Luidaeg, Amandine and Eira. Luidaeg calling out her sisters on their bullshit and hammering in that she did nothing to deserve such treatment, Amandine stating that Eira and Luidaeg are same and just want to manipulate and sacrifice her for their own objectives, and Eira accusing two of them of being weak and hiding behind facade of benevolence while she admits her hunger for power.

okay, first off, I stand by absolutely everything I said in the original post, particular the opening song and Quentin’s Disney Princess song and May’s rock interjection and Tybalt and Toby’s sappy love/battle song and…all of it

To your suggestions:

amendment/addition to original post: the Luidaeg’s song definitely has echoes of “Poor Unfortunate Souls”, but it’s also a) played mostly on a lute, save when a whole damn orchestra kicks in for the last verse or so, and b) sung - BELTED, opera-level lungs - from center stage while behind her, he whole bloody story is acted out - the Roane, the jealous mortals, the skinning, the kinslaying, the promise, the selkies. The bindings and the Sea Witch. It’s danced in something like if ballet was infected by Irish riverdance.

and then the light returns to the rest of the stage, the flashback over, and she resumes being amiably bitchy at Toby & co.

I LOVE the idea of Amandine having a not-a-hero song. Honestly, that’s one of the most sympathetic interpretations I’ve heard of Amandine, that refusal to do this thing that was just kind of dumped on her and her bloodline by prophecy, and I kind of love it? Let her have her very soprano solo.

the songs don’t stop with Eira, though. Are you kidding? The songs are Faerie; songs are the very essence of story and story is the very essence of a world in which Hero is a title and acknowledged archetype as much as it is a noun. This is a fairy tale, and Eira is and always has been the Evil Fairy Godmother. Eira certainly has a song, and it’s sugary-sweet and 100% Broadway classic and about the power she’s going to seize, to finally be adored as she deserves and subjugate everyone unworthy. 

Maybe she mentions her sisters by name, and when she does, they appear - the Luidaeg Annie as someone she’s beaten, Amy as someone she’s using. But the Luidaeg argues back with each line, though Eira doesn’t acknowledge her, and Amandine just starts reprising her own song as soon as she’s onstage. The Luidaeg starts doing that, too, and then it’s all three of them - Titania’s daughter in at center stage, Oberon’s and Maeve’s one on each far corner, singing their own songs in overlapping harmony, lyrics sometimes similar, sometimes deliberately contrasting

I…have trouble imagining a Luna song? I’m not sure why. She just…she’s often aggressively uninvolved with the plot. If she has a song, it would just be a verse or two and it would involve rose gardening as an increasingly dark metaphor for life.

Simon, though…if you want to be really sad about Simon, he also gets a flashback song. It’s him and Amandine and August as a young girl, and it’s soft and sweet, energetic enough for raising a daughter but never frenetic, never aggressive. It’s just about how happy he was and how much he loved his wife and daughter. It probably has a melodic or at least lyrical echo somewhere of Sylvester’s “I’ll be here” song for Toby.

and then in the present day, whenever Simon sings, it’s just a reprise of Eira’s song, even if some of the lyrics still reflect his old song. Maybe, here and there, the melody also slips back…but never for long

until they find August, of course. Then Eira’s song leaves completely, rotten oranges losing to apples

Quentin gets the One True Disney Princess “I Want” Song, but August would also have one, really. Or, it was a Disney Princess “I Want” Song™ once. Then she got lost, fucked up, and spent a century alone in Annwn, and now it’s kind of clipped and too shrill, cynical and bitter, demanding rather than simply yearning. And I still kind of love her, so help me god

if Rayseline gets to sing (why not; there’s no plot here), it’s basically Cassandra’s “Crossing the Line” and “Nothing Left to Lose” from Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventures, which I shall not at this time disclose how many times I’ve listened to on repeat

[arielmackav]

❛  when you were little you held your mother’s favorite glass figurine in your fingers & you loved it so tightly that you snapped it in your palms & since then you’ve let go of beautiful things before you get around to breaking them. ❜

SYDNEY SWEENEY? No, that’s actually ARIEL MACKAY from the MARAUDERS ERA. You know, the child of ISABELLE MACKAY? Only 24 years old, this SLYTHERIN alumni works as a WAITRESS and is sided with THE NEUTRALS. SHE identifies as CIS WOMAN and is a MUGGLEBORN who is known to be BLUNT, CRUDE, and RECKLESS but also LOYAL, INGENIOUS, and AMBITIOUS.

character inspiration: rebecca bunch (crazy ex-girlfriend), eleanor shellstrop (the good place), gina linetti (brooklyn nine-nine), shane madej (buzzfeed unsolved), annie landsberg (maniac), maeve wiley (sex education) aesthetic: bottles of whiskey stashed beneath a mattress, the mess of a home the morning after a party, lacy red lingerie, neon signs lighting up a dark room, boisterous laughter sounding from the bedroom, cherry red lips sucking on a lollipop links: stats, pinterest triggers: parental death, substance abuse, bipolar disorder, suicide attempt, medication

isabelle mackay was born into a small, devoutly catholic family, built on traditions and strict beliefs that mimicked the ideals of the outside world. with her mother at home to fulfil the role of housewife, her father was left to work every day in rough factory conditions in order to make ends meet. the family was poor, that much was obvious, but there was never any love to compensate for all the bad luck this family had been dealt. isabelle was never good enough, never christian enough, never helpful enough, and the birth of ariel winter mackay on april 3rd 1956 when isabelle was just twenty, fathered by a man without a face nor a name, was the straw to break the camels back — isabelle would never speak to her parents again.

ariel’s childhood was fun, but at the same time kind of rocky. i mean, issy didn’t have any family left, she was a single mum in the late fifties working a part-time secretary job and she had no idea how to raise a child. ari and issy spent a lot of time with issy’s friends, who became like aunts to ariel and allowed her to grow up surrounded by strong, independent women.

but ariel had a bit of a troublesome streak. it seemed as though chaos and destruction followed her everywhere she went, and it caused her to jump from school to school until she’d eventually been expelled from eight primary schools by the age of eleven. issy could not understand what was wrong, she couldn’t explain certain things that happened around the little blonde girl because they were seemingly unexplainable, and she was starting to grow seriously worried until a tall woman with a big hat knocked on their door and introduced the mackay family to the world of magic.

ariel was honestly ecstatic to go to hogwarts. she’d always known that she was different to the other kids, that she was special, and this only went on the prove it. and now, surrounded by other kids the same as her, maybe she could finally find a place that she fit in - a place that she could call home.

she was sorted into slytherin after a minute of the hat sitting on her head, and at first she slotted right in with the rest of her housemates. they were all just as fun, ambitious and intelligent as her and she was excited to find a place that she belonged. but slowly she started to notice that still she was being treated differently - there was something about her that had other kids turning their noses and left her unable to befriend many of her housemates for the pure reason that they wouldn’t talk to her. the first time she was called a mudblood, she cried for days - she’d expected hogwarts to be welcoming and instead she was still that weird kid that everyone wanted to avoid.

of course, as she grew up, it became obvious that not everyone hated her. she started to hang out with more of the gryffindors in her year and sought out the people who weren’t disgusted by her ambiguous (‘tainted’) lineage. moving through her first, her second, her third year, she became quite popular amongst the student body, and her fun-loving, easy-going attitude attracted many boys and girls who wanted to befriend her.

[ BIPOLAR & MEDICATION TW a small hiccup arose in her third year, when a pattern of violent, depressed and manic behaviour began to show in her every day life. at the tender age of fourteen, ariel was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and at age fifteen was prescribed lithium in order to keep it in check. her tendency for manic episodes meant she had to tone down on her usually adventurous nature and had to keep a check on how many people she surrounded herself with - too many and she could be sent over the edge. though she was still widely popular and incredibly fun to be around, she wasn’t known to have many close friends and was sometimes noted to disappear for days without explanation and return as if nothing has happened. END TW ]

[ PARENTAL DEATH TW everything was all pretty smooth sailing for miss mackay until a few months before the end of her sixth year, when she received a letter detailing the horrific death of her mother, isabelle mackay. devastated could hardly begin to describe how ariel felt — it was as if her whole world was crumbling around her. her mother, her one true rock throughout all the pain and misery and heartache of her life was gone and now she had no one. END TW ]

[ SUICIDE & SUBSTANCE ABUSE TW after the death, ariel fell into a deep depression into which no one could pull her out. for a while she relied on substance abuse to even keep her going, but after coming close to suffering from alcohol poisoning, she moved off it and instead completely isolated herself from everyone around her and allowed herself to fall deeper and deeper into her own depression. over the winter break of her sixth year, during which she had moved to her mum’s friends place in dublin, ariel finally completely broke and attempted to take her own life. of course, she was not successful, but after spending months in the hospital after this attempt, she finally spoke to a professional and started on the slow and bumpy road to recovery. END TW ]

alycia (her mum’s friend and now ariel’s caregiver) was reluctant to allow ariel to return to hogwarts after the traumatic few months they had endured, but after much begging on ariel’s part, she finally relented. returning to hogwarts for her final year, it was clear that ariel was all but a different person. once the life of the party, the sassy and adventurous and fun-loving girl of her year, ariel was now much quieter and a lot less adventurous. she was still ever so dependent on alcohol and still talking to a psychologist within hogwarts (as was requested by alycia), and though it was clear that ariel mackay was all but a different person, she was trying her very best to once again be happy.

but of course, being truly happy is never going to be easy. with grades that could only be described as subpar and absolutely no idea as to what she wanted to do with her life, ariel felt lost after leaving school. she wanted to make a difference in the world, she wanted to prove that just because you didn’t come from magic, didn’t mean you couldn’t prove yourself in this world, but how the hell was she supposed to do that without the grades to prove it? she tried anyway to apply for the auror program, but of course they all but laughed in her face, and so instead she spent a year doing nothing, feeling sorry for herself and trying to figure out what the hell it was she wanted.

deciding ultimately on her nineteenth birthday that she was sick of sitting around, she found herself a job at the hogs head, serving the drinks she so often drowned herself in. she saved every dollar she received, living with alycia still to avoid the cost of rent and at twenty-one, still lost and confused, she flew herself to philadelphia in america and attempted desperately to find a reason to smile.

it was in philly that ariel met natalie --- and for the first time of her life, ariel fell in love. the romance was tumultuous, to say the least, full of twists and turns and bumps that left them on and off again for over a year. it was on the fourteenth month of their relationship that they got into another screaming match and when natalie told ariel to leave and never come back, she meant it. and ariel was devastated. she thought she’d found a home in philly. with natalie, the good times had been worth the bad and she’d finally been as happy as she was before her mothers death. and now it was finished.

one week after the break up, ariel packed her bags and left --- back to london. alycia welcomed her back with open arms, but that didn’t make it any easier. her heart was broken, and she was still lost. finding a job at a small cafe in hogsmeade, ariel tried to put her life back in order, but she didn’t even know what that order was. twenty-three and still completely directionless, still just a blip on most people’s radar, just a drunk adult, on and off her meds, never truly happy.

she’s trying, though --- she’ll always try. she moved out of alycia’s home into her own apartment, she surrounded herself with people who love her and she applied for the auror program every month (still no word). she stayed out of the war only if to keep herself sane (but she’s obviously sided with the order --- she’d be damned if anyone doubted her ability just because she was a muggleborn). she didn’t have much purpose, but it felt good to try.

the timeclash, though --- now didn’t that fuck things up. she had to start all over again. alycia wasn’t with her, and in fact, why the hell was she? but what might be worse is the fact that she can’t find out anything about what happened to her... no one remembers her, she had no children, she didn’t die in heroic sacrifice. she just was, and she was... boring. all this time she’s been focused on being happy, but maybe she should’ve been worried about making a goddamn difference. she’s a nobody, and she wants to be a somebody.

RANDOM FACTS

swears like a sailor and drinks just as heavily. it’s a vice she’s never been able to shake and kind of doesn’t want to? yikes

used to see a therapist once a month but ghosted him about a month before the timeclash. why? who knows! she’s never been good at keeping a handle on her mental health --- she gets lost and confused and assumes no one can help her. this is the fourth time she’s done this.

has a small silver bangle on her left wrist that she fiddles with when she’s anxious. it used to belong to her mother, her and alycia found it while sorting through her stuff after her death, and tbh she hasn’t taken it off since the day they found it. it’s a part of her mother that she can take everywhere with her, and that’s a comfort you just can’t surpass.

[mackayari]

❛  when you were little you held your mother’s favorite glass figurine in your fingers & you loved it so tightly that you snapped it in your palms & since then you’ve let go of beautiful things before you get around to breaking them. ❜

have you been re-introduced to ARIEL MACKAY? last we heard, the HALFBLOOD was most familiar with TIMELINE ONE. I don’t recall if they were always a SLYTHERIN, but I’ve heard the SEVENTH YEAR is still AMBITIOUS, LOYAL, INGENIOUS and CRUDE, RECKLESS, BLUNT, so that’s familiar. at least SHE remembers her way around the castle.

character parallels: rebecca bunch (crazy ex-girlfriend), eleanor shellstrop (the good place), gina linetti (brooklyn nine-nine), shane madej (buzzfeed unsolved), annie landsberg (maniac), maeve wiley (sex education) aesthetic: bottles of whiskey stashed beneath a mattress, the mess of a home the morning after a party, lacy red lingerie, neon signs lighting up a dark room, boisterous laughter sounding from the bedroom, cherry red lips sucking on a lollipop links: stats, pinterest triggers: parental death, substance abuse, bipolar disorder, suicide attempt

ariel mackay never knew her father. in fact, her mother ( isabelle mackay ) isn’t even quite sure who the man is. the late fifties proved to be a tough time for poor old isabelle mackay, and it resulted in excessive alcohol consumption, a string of one night stands, and eventually the birth of her one and only daughter, ariel winter mackay, on april 3rd, 1960, when she was only twenty years of age. if they were to ever investigate, they would indeed find that ari’s father was a famous pureblood wizard, thus making her a half-blood, as issy is a muggle.

ariel’s childhood was fun, but at the same time kind of rocky. i mean, issy didn’t have any family left, she was a single mum in the early sixties working a part-time secretary job and she had no idea how to raise a child. ari and issy spent a lot of time with issy’s friends, who became like aunts to ariel and allowed her to grow up surrounded by strong, independent women.

but ariel had a bit of a troublesome streak. it seemed as though chaos and destruction followed her everywhere she went, and it caused her to jump from school to school until she’d eventually been expelled from eight primary schools by the age of eleven. issy could not understand what was wrong, she couldn’t explain certain things that happened around the little blonde girl because they were seemingly unexplainable, and she was starting to grow seriously worried until a tall woman with a big hat knocked on their door and introduced the mackay family to the world of magic.

ariel was honestly ecstatic to go to hogwarts. she’d always known that she was different to the other kids, that she was special, and this only went on the prove it. and now, surrounded by other kids the same as her, maybe she could finally find a place that she fit in - a place that she could call home.

she was sorted into slytherin after a minute of the hat sitting on her head, and at first she slotted right in with the rest of her housemates. they were all just as fun, ambitious and intelligent as her and she was excited to find a place that she belonged. but slowly she started to notice that still she was being treated differently - there was something about her that had other kids turning their noses and left her unable to befriend many of her housemates for the pure reason that they wouldn’t talk to her. the first time she was called a mudblood, she cried for days - she’d expected hogwarts to be welcoming and instead she was still that weird kid that everyone wanted to avoid.

of course, as she grew up, it became obvious that not everyone hated her. she started to hang out with more of the gryffindors in her year and sought out the people who weren’t disgusted by her ambiguous ( ‘tainted’ ) lineage. moving through her first, her second, her third year, she became quite popular amongst the student body, and her fun-loving, easy-going attitude attracted many boys and girls who wanted to befriend her.

a small hiccup arose in her third year, when a pattern of violent, depressed and manic behaviour began to show in her every day life. at the tender age of fourteen, ariel was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and at age fifteen was prescribed lithium in order to keep it in check. her tendency for manic episodes meant she had to tone down on her usually adventurous nature and had to keep a check on how many people she surrounded herself with - too many and she could be sent over the edge. though she was still widely popular and incredibly fun to be around, she wasn’t known to have many close friends and was sometimes noted to disappear for days without explanation and return as if nothing has happened.

DEATH TW: everything was all pretty smooth sailing for miss mackay until a few months before the end of her fifth year, when she received a letter detailing the horrific death of her mother, isabelle mackay, at the hands of a drunk driver.devastated could hardly begin to describe how ariel felt — it was as if her whole world was crumbling around her. her mother, her one true rock throughout all the pain and misery and heartache of her life was gone and now she had no one.

SUICIDE TW: after the death, ariel fell into a deep depression into which no one could pull her out. for a while she relied on substance abuse to even keep her going, but after coming close to suffering from alcohol poisoning, she moved off it and instead completely isolated herself from everyone around her and allowed herself to fall deeper and deeper into her own depression. over the winter break of her fifth year, during which she had moved to her mum’s friends place in dublin, ariel finally completely broke and attempted suicide. of course, she was not successful, but after spending months in the hospital after this attempt, she finally spoke to a professional and started on the slow and bumpy road to recovery.

alycia ( her mum’s friend and now ariel’s caregiver ) was reluctant to allow ariel to return to hogwarts after the traumatic few months they had endured, but after much begging on ariel’s part, she finally relented. returning to hogwarts for her sixth year, it was clear that ariel was all but a different person. once the life of the party, the sassy and adventurous and fun-loving girl of her year, ariel was now much quieter and a lot less adventerous. she was still ever so dependent on alcohol and still talking to a psychologist within hogwarts ( as was requested by alycia ), and though it was clear that ariel mackay was all but a different person, she was trying her very best to once again be happy.

and then it happened --- and everything was suddenly a thousand times worse. a battle caused by a war that ariel had never been exposed to, her mind torn into a body that had experienced things she’d never even dreamed of. at first, it wasn’t even obvious to her ( alycia was still alycia and ariel was still ariel ) but when she started receiving letters from a girl she’d hardly spoken to in the year below her claiming to be her ‘best friend’, she knew that something was up. and now, she’s terrified; terrified because she knows she has to do something, even when she hardly has a grip on what’s going on. she’s muggleborn and proud ( at least to her knowledge ) and the knowledge that that could get her killed in this universe makes her sick to her stomach. she wants to fight --- to do something. she just doesn’t know what that something is yet...