#malware of the forest
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the phone shook in their hands as they were shoved into the dark trees
This was a stupid dare
There had been rumors of some other-worldly being in these woods, the few survivors of what should've been fatal injuries having gone mad from whatever they saw
They huffed, making sure they recorded everything to prove that this thing was real.
Twigs snapped under shoes, giving them away to anything that may lurk in the shadows.
Something moves to their right, which they quickly move so that the camera is facing the shifting shadows.
They can only watch through the screen as horror grips their heart. No wonder those people went mad
The screen glitched and bugs out the longer it's recording this entity, who seems to stalk closer, just trying to look at it made their head hurt
The shadows seemed to close around them, what little light the moon gave off slowly disappearing with their sanity. They couldn't look away despite how hard they tried.
What felt like hands gripped them, far too many to be human but all felt humanoid. It was sickening.
A thousand voices whisper to them, all in their head as the entity closes any way of escape. It had lost enough of its prey before.
(tw for violence, slight dissecting and just. Horror type shit ahead )
The flash of sharp, almost mangled teeth snap them out of the odd trance a moment too late, a howling scream echoing through the trees as sharp points dig into giving skin and flesh.
Blood drips in thick rivulets onto the shadow that surrounds them as they're torn open, life being drained with each drop as innards are greedily devoured by something that can't be comprehended by their mortal mind. Only their heart and lungs remained in their open chest, life slipping from between their ribs and into the jaws of this being.
A single eye shows itself, curved with the glee of a hunter as they rip into one lung, tearing it out and swallowing the organ without care. Death seemed to loom in its gaze as it reached a hand in, fingers curling around that frantic, fragile little heart.
It cooed words that couldn't be heard as it slowly pulled that vital pump out of the dying body, who knew they were dead the moment they stepped into the dense forest.
The phone drops from their hand as their heart is wrought free from their nearly empty chest, sharp teeth stabbing into it, forcing blood to gush out and stain its face and teeth.
Even without their heart, they'd live for a few moments, not very long, but enough to see those jaws come down on their skull, making everything go black.
It devoured whatever was left of the fresh corpse, leaving nothing to waste, not even the bones that were broken to get to their innards.
It carried an unusual hunger that seemed to never cease, never calm on days. It could hold it off for a week at maximum before being forced to hunt and devour.
It noticed the phone, a face splitting grin finding its way onto its features.
The next morning, the phone was found at the outskirts of the forest, blood splattered on its case and screen
The only thing new in the camera roll? A video that could only show so much of the entity tearing into the wandering person, the angle sparing no hope or imagination of survival for its prey.
Hopefully that would discourage wandering people from entering that part of the woods for quite some time
Malware watches the people panic over the device, a silent smile on his dark features. A smile stained with blood.
#malware#original character#dca oc#ask malware#malware dca#tw blood#tw guts#tw horror#<to some degree#Malware becomes the horrors and fucking kills someone
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saturday, december 7th, 2024
I'm still trying to make my way though Practical Malware Analysis before the end of the year! I have to finish 2 chapters per week to make that deadline, which... may not be realistic, lmao. Today I managed to read chapter 15 and do all 3 labs! this chapter was all about anti-disassembly techniques, which were really cool to learn about. It's not every day that I have the time or energy to go through a whole chapter in a day, so I'm going to celebrate it when it happens. 15 chapters done, 6 more to go, let's do this!
also who else is obsessed with the snowy trees in the forest app during December?? I love them hehe
#studyblr#studyspo#study inspo#study aesthetic#notes aesthetic#op#I might try to start posting more just as accountability for myself#I reeeeeally want to finish this book before the new year#so I can start learning more new things hehe
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-Static Blog Masterpost-
This is a Roleplay and Ask account for my (mod, @stormbreaker-290) Original Characters, Static and Morgan.
They both live together in a nice little house out in a forest roughly 20 minutes away from the nearest town.
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Static talks "Like this"
Morgan talks "Like this"
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General things and Boundaries:
Feel free to ask them just about anything!! Most things go, but try to at least keep em respectful.
Hate/rage bait asks are accepted when directed towards my characters, but only when out of love of the game (current events and angst) and not genuine hate of them.
Mod swears like a motherfucking sailor, and this is not refrained from in characters either.
There will be some nsfw suggestive/implied content. I always try to tag properly, so if you don't want to see this, kindly block the warning tags below.
I am slow. I take my time formulating responses, and appreciate not being rushed. I have things to do outside of roleplays, and my motivation can be finicky at times.
That being said, I am also forgetful. If you do think I've forgotten about an ongoing rp thread, feel free to @ me or message me a reminder, I don't bite. Usually/silly
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Static and Morgan's backstory
Official Static Playlist
Static refsheet
Morgan ref TBA
↓ More info and used tags under the cut ↓
Static is bisexual, polyamorous, and genderfluid. Their pronouns are he/she/they
Morgan is asexual, demi-panromantic, and nonbinary. His pronouns are he/they
Static and Morgan are partners in a very... non-label fitting way. It's not romantic or sexual, but they're so impeccably closer than just friends. They've lived and died together, seen the worst of eachothers hearts, and the height of their happiness. They're not definable by family, queerplatonic is close, but the best way they could possibly describe each other is "home".
Static is romantic partners with @malwaresilly (Malware and Solaris), @n0va-st3lluna, and Sirius the nursery attendant (who's blog is currently taken over Lore wise at the moment, and will be properly @-ed afterwards)
Static has a Daughter with Malware and Solaris conceived of magic, named Holo.
Morgan shares a pet Ferret named Milktoast with Scone ( @crumpet-doodles )
Static and Morgan are currently having Astraia ( @multifandomcutie13 ) stay over at their place for a prolonged period of time.
Tags:
#ooc rambles < exactly what it sounds like, used for most out of character posts
#mod draws < used along with my main's art tag, for any doodles I may post here
#mod writes < same as above but with any written drabbles I may cook up
#ask static < asks answered by Static
#rp tag < used for every roleplay
#rp tag but gayer < used for the rare instances of more explicit roleplays (if you don't want to see em, this is the tag to block)
#ask morgan < asks answered by Morgan
#static the beloved < used for just about everything Static, including asks, rps, and other related posts
#morgan the beloved < used for just about everything Morgan, including asks, rps, and other related posts
pretty much all character interactions are tagged with "#[character] beloved" or "#[character] my beloved"
When they're not, it will be either "#[character] my beloathed" or "#[character] my detested" or just the other parties character tag (< The latter doesnt mean they're necessarily hated, just not categorized yet)
...the one outlier in this is "#Titan the tolerated" . Because it's funny.
I use any content warning tags where applicable, though the most reoccurring ones are:
#tw suggestive
#tw slightly suggestive
#tw very suggestive
^ if any of these actually bother you, do yourself a favor and block those tags. you are responsible for curating your own experience, and all we can do is warn you of the contents of our content. Please don't come at me, or anyone else, over harmless rp fun that might've made you uncomfortable. The block button exists for a reason.
#tw violence
#have some tags!#ooc rambles#mod writes#mod draws#rp tag#ask static#ask morgan#static the beloved#morgan the beloved#ehh i knew itd post early but its like 99% done anygays so idc#masterpost
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Even After That...
fandom: PLAVE pairing: Yu Hamin x reader genre: angst word count: 5.2k prompt: "I want you back..."
~ Yejun ~ Noah ~ Bamby ~ Eunho ~
Something was haunting him. Wherever he went, there were glimpses and shadows. He wasn’t sure if he was seeing things, but the air always became heavy when it was nearby.
It first happened when he tried to help Noah.
When he first came to his World, he was embraced by the older man. Clothed in garments similar to a mage and breathed magic, Noah sobbed loudly into his chest while babbled nonstop. After prying the big baby off of him, Hamin learned that Noah had a friend who looked just like him.
“You have the same name too.” Noah sniffed, rubbing his nose. “Are you from another universe?”
Hamin found that impossible since his Story felt incomplete. His home was made out of data and code, alongside the faceless people who monotonously went on about their day. But at the moment, anything felt possible.
After jumping through the rift, Hamin found that they were stuck and even worse, the World was becoming smaller and smaller by the day. No matter how long Noah tried to use magic to restore the World's balance, there was no helping it.
Just like his own World, something was destroying Caelum.
Hamin quickly tried retrieving data from the World. It's not difficult, but the World can be unpredictable. He had already been chased by multiple animals and got lost in the forest. What else could happen?
A scream resonated within the area Hamin was in, sending shivers down his spine. Almost all of the humans within this World had already disappeared, except for Noah. Was it an animal?
Regardless of what it was, he had to go check.
Bounding through the underbrush, Hamin was shadowed by a giant digital mass. It loomed over him and its screech was high-pitched, vibrating the air. He spotted a cloaked figure lying beneath it and his determination was set a-new. Quickly, he fought the malware off and once he was sure that it wouldn’t form again, he rummaged around for the corrupted core.
It hadn’t revealed itself when he beat it down, which was concerning. More shrieks in the distance erupted. There were more? Hamin let the displeasure on his face show. There wasn’t a peaceful day in Noah's World.
Picking the inconspicuous figure up, he hurried back to the barrier set around the castle. Noah was waiting for him in the garden.
“Where have you been? I thought you were getting–” He stopped once he saw the figure in his arms. “Wha–who? There’s still people around?!”
“I thought so too, but we should check them over.” Hamin tried to peer underneath the hood, but couldn’t see within the dark. “They might not be here for long.”
That’s what he said, but he was surprised to find what he was looking at.
After a long trek to the library, Noah instructed Hamin to use any of the tables and desk as a makeshift bed to use. Hamin caught a glimpse of something shining underneath the depths of the cloak and he gently pried the cloth back to take a look.
The person’s body was made of dust. Specifically, they looked like an animated mannequin made out of sand. Their face was crafted to make it look like they were sleeping and their clothes were etched into their body.
Noah couldn’t help but stare down at the body, before speaking.
“Where did you get this?”
Hamin was still, watching Noah with calculated eyes. Noah’s face was tight, a scowl replacing his usual smile.
“Hyung, what do you mean? I found them.” Hamin asked slowly. “Do…you know them?”
Noah flinched. So he did.
Hamin opened his mouth to confront him, but the ‘mannequin’ suddenly began to move. They sat up, raising a hand to hold their head, and then turned to face them. Hamin held his breath. Although they were awake, their face remained unchanged from being in a slumber.
“AH!” They jumped down from the wooden desk it laid on and grabbed at the hood to pull it over their face. It hesitated before trying to sprint to the door.
“No–Wait!”
Noah sprinted after them and grabbed a hold of their cloak, tugging it right off.
“NO!”
Everything went so fast that Hamin could barely comprehend what had happened. The desk was suddenly in front of the door, blocking the exit, and the ‘mannequin’ was crouched in the shadows, trying to block their face. Noah breathed hard as he tried to maintain his magic.
“Wait..please…” He gasped. “Is that…is it really you?”
The figure froze.
“Please, I–I’ve been looking for you. Where have you been? What happened? Are–”
“That’s…enough…Noah…” Slowly, the figure stood up and stepped into the light.
Hamin could see them clearly now. They were dressed in royal garb, but pieces were missing. The light made it look like their material body was shifting. He felt a few prickles bite at his neck.
“It is…!” Noah lowered his arms, letting the magic fade from his fingertips. “I’ve been so worried. How could you disappear like that? If you hadn’t—”
“N-Noah…” They stumbled forward and fell to their knees. But not before Noah hurried to catch them.
“What’s going on?” Noah’s voice cracked. “Hold on! I can restore you!”
“No..ah…please…” They flopped around in his arms before trying to cover his mouth. Their hand passed right through them. “I–I don’t…have much time…but…”
With a bright glow, a pink cube emerged from their chest.
“That’s…!” Noah gasped.
“A Restore Point.” Hamin finished.
“I…had to find it…complete it…before…it was…too late…” They used their faintly glowing hand to guide it to Noah’s own chest. “And now…I can finally…give it to you…”
Noah looked at them and Hamin felt his skin bristle. “Wait–Noah-hyung!”
“Without…regrets…”
With one push, the cube was pushed into Noah’s chest.
Noah’s body pulsed and a bright light erupted from the sky. A rift was opened, revealing a deep blue and purple ocean from afar. Hamin couldn’t believe it. A successful rift was made and it didn’t look like it was going to close anytime soon. He turned back to the pair, only to see Hamin holding a disappearing figure.
“Noah…I’m–”
“No,” Noah grabbed at the light, focusing his magic around it. “Z-zip your mouth. I don’t want to hear anything until you’ve recovered.”
“Noah…”
“Stop–please, I’m trying to help for once.”
“Hey, I–”
“If you would just–”
“HEY, IDIOT!”
The room rang and everyone went still.
“Let me just,” They breathed, running a fading hand through Noah’s hair. “Talk to you once more, ok?”
Hamin watched as Noah nodded silently.
“Good.” They laughed. “Hey, remember when you didn’t want to get married when we were younger? Did you really dislike me that much?”
Noah shook his head, his hand shaking as he tried to grab hold of them. “...Never. I’ve loved you ever since we met.”
A soft laugh echoed in the room.
“Me too.”
~ ~
It was hard to pull Noah away from the library. He moved like a ghost and wouldn’t look away from the spot that shimmered with bright flecks of sparkles, remnants from the last remaining person from the World.
Hamin prepared their departure from this World to the next. Noah made no objections, only asking if his World would remain intact with him gone.
“With the Restore Point activated, this world is frozen in time at this moment.” Hamin said slowly.
“...And if we leave?”
“It should stay the same until we get back.”
It would be hard to notice the way Noah clutched at his chest.
With preparations done and ready, Hamin and Noah opened a portal at the edge of the sea.
The next World led him to Yejun.
The world was strange, an underwater city that lived and thrived with aquatic animals. But like Noah’s World, there was no one left.
Hamin could only spot sources of code with his goggles, but they couldn’t find anyone. Noah used his magic to create a portal that led them to rooftops, but all they could find was scattered pieces of clothes and crustaceans that trailed along their feet.
“Why would the rift take us here?” Noah grumbled, shaking a purple crab that latched onto his foot. “There’s no one here.”
“The rift takes us to worlds that have at least one surviving Story.” Hamin groaned, stretching his stiff muscles. “We just have to find them.”
Noah may be older than him, but he complained more than a toddler. Hamin nudged a rock with his foot, revealing a small hole. He squinted, crouching down to examine it. There was something glowing at the bottom. The hole was narrow, barely letting him fit his wrist in, but it wasn’t as deep as he thought. Carefully, he pinched the soft object with two fingers and pulled it out.
“What did you find?” Noah jogged over to him, peering over his shoulder.
Hamin stared at the small blue orb that hung in front of his face. Upon closer inspection, there was a small figure encapsulated within the middle.
“An undine?” Noah poked the outer shell, watching it ripple.
“I thought it was a water spirit?” Hamin carefully held the orb in his palm, peering closer to get a better look. The figure’s small head slightly raised and when it met his eyes, the bubble glowed bright.
“Whoa! Huh–?”
Hamin watched as the little fairy zipped around him multiple times and then suddenly began to nuzzle against his neck and face. Just like Noah, it seemed to recognize him. It made cooing noises and warbled in a tone he couldn’t understand. But Hamin wasn’t from this World. What was going on? Was his Story intertwined with others?
“So, the Undine knows you too?” Noah held his hand up to touch the fairy and it whizzed around his wrist before letting him stroke the outer shell. Hamin could only shake his head and shrug. The fairy hugged his cheek one last time before grabbing at his finger and began to pull him forward, indicating that he followed them.
They ran through the city streets and found themselves at a tall building. When they tried to enter the building, they found barnacles and algae blocking the entrance. The fairy let out a call and some sea creatures responded, a dolphin and a small whale. The fairy hopped on the head of the whale before pushing the two on the back of the whale.
It took them to the top of the tower, where a dome sat around its head. In the middle of it was a hatch. Was this where the Story was coming to an end? They followed the fairy through the hatch and found a lab. It was clean and very minimalist. A bed sat on one side, while a desk was set up on the other side. The walls were replaced with windows, overlooking the sky with glowing sea creatures swimming around the building.
A crash came from the other side of the room and Hamin looked over to see a man sitting on the floor. His expression was funny as his eyes and mouth were wide open, but as his mouth remained open, bubbles came forth and rose to the ceiling. Noah couldn’t help but snicker at the sight.
“Ha-Hamin…and…? No, who…who are you?” The man scrambled to get up, grabbing a hold of the closest thing to him, a snowglobe. “I thought…everyone disappeared? How did you both survive? Has the disease…?”
“Your World is falling apart then too?” Noah interrupted.
“What…yes.” The man seemed to glare at the two of them. “Of course it is! What do you think is going on?!”
“Our World’s are also falling apart. Caelum is being attacked by a…something.” Hamin stepped forward, extending his hand. “We came from other World in Caelum. I am called ‘Hamin’. We can help you.”
The man wearily looked at the two of them before setting the snow globe down and grasping his hand.
“Alright. My name is Nam Yejun.” He gave a small smile, and Hamin felt hopeful. “How did you find me? The city is too big to single me out here.”
“There was a water spirit that helped us find you.”
Yejun’s expression morphed into one of confusion. “A water spirit?”
Hamin nodded, looking over to the floating orb. “Yes. It knew that you were here.”
He watched as Yejun looked up, watching as the orb slowly drifted towards his face. It orbited his head, seemingly happy to see him, before nuzzling his cheek. The man looked to be confused by this creature but as it cuddled up to him, his eyes became vacant and his expression turned watery.
Hamin could barely hear what Yejun whispered next.
“Is it really you?”
A faint glow responded to him and the fairy chirped. Yejun carefully held the small thing closer to his face, softly sobbing as he did.
“I thought…”
He was quietly silenced as the fairy clung to his face.
“I’m sorry for interrupting,” Hamin cleared his throat. “But have you observed anything that might have changed your world recently?”
“Ah…” Yejun hastily wiped at his eyes. “Almost. I’m a doctor and I have been researching the disease that has been taking everyone. But after…the last person was taken, my research has been slow.”
“But you’re still here.” Noah questioned. “What if there was something in…your blood or something? Have you tried that?”
“Believe me, I have.” Yejun led them over to a small kitchen island, stacked with lab equipment. “I have dolphin DNA in me, but if I was left, what about the other dolphins? The disease reacts with any type of DNA, regardless of gene and blood biology.”
“At the moment, before Caelum disappears completely, we need to find a Restore Point.” Hamin crossed his arms, trying to remember the city’s map they just trekked through.
“Restore Point? You mean…?”
“Something like part of a game, yes.” Noah finished. “I didn’t understand it until recently either.”
“If we can find one, then your World can be saved.” Hamin picked himself up from the seat he was sitting in and began to walk towards the hatch.
A chirp trilled throughout the space and the three men looked to find the blue fairy circling the air. Yejun called out to it with a chirp-like noise and it began to circle him too.
“Does it know where one is?” Noah asked, leaning forward to look at the orb.
“I think so,” Yejun grabbed at it gently and led it to a table, where a map was laid out. “Where is it? Do you remember?”
The fairy circled the map once and then stopped in the middle, before doing something akin to coughing something up. Hamin noticed the flash of pink and hurried over to find that the water spirit had spit up–
“Is that…?”
“A Restore Point!” Noah exclaimed.
“Where did you find this?” Hamin asked.
The blue orb pointed to a place on the map. The building top where they found the spirit. Hamin felt incredibly lucky to have found everything in one fell swoop. A rumble shook the sky and the building began to shake. Everyone held on to something, as what felt to be an earthquake began to erupt beneath them.
“What is that?”
Hamin looked towards the direction that Noah was pointing and watched as an amalgamation of malware swarmed the darkening sky. It took the shape of a large whale, bigger than the ones they saw earlier that day. Its body pulsed and shimmered a black color and tried to swarm the building with its body.
As quickly as he could, Hamin moved across the room and tried to climb back to the hatch. He had to eliminate it before it caused more harm to this World!
“Hamin-ah, wait up!” Noah climbed up after him, trying to keep balanced as the building shook around them.
“Hyung, get back! It's dangerous!”
“That's what I should be telling you!”
As the hatch was opened, a strong breeze almost swept the two away. The storm that the malware was calling was getting worse. The malware let out a screech and another gust of wind blew their way. Hamin held on to the hatch but Noah wasn't fast enough. He was lifted from the roof and was about to be thrown away!
With a swipe of his arm, Hamin grabbed Noah’s flailing hand. A pulse traveled down his arm and for a moment, Hamin watched something flash in his memory. A kingdom, thriving magic, and…someone.
He understood.
With one pull, he brought Noah close and they held onto each other.
“Noah-hyung! I get it! I can use it!”
“Huh--What?!” The confusion on Noah's face was priceless. “What can you use?!”
“That spell!”
Noah understood as he carefully examined Hamin's face and with a nod, the two of them began to use light to draw a circle of runes. The copied magic that flowed through Hamin's body felt strange, but also familiar. It was almost like he had always known, but couldn't remember.
Another screech vibrated for a moment, but then stopped. Hamin looked over to see another figure beside them. Yejun and the water spirit stood next to them, arms upwards in using their own magic power to still the malware in a water prison.
Without hesitating, Hamin and Noah used ‘Purifying Light’ to bore a hole through the giant malware. Hamin watched as it dissipated into the sky and faded from this World. A wave of exhaustion flooded his body and he felt himself collapse against Noah. It became painful afterwards and his muscles wouldn't move an inch. Yejun began to treat the two of them, using his water power to soothe the body.
The World was saved and now they had to use the Restore Point.
“Yejun-hyung,” Hamin croaked, clearing his throat quickly. “Where's the ‘restore point’?”
“Ah, here.” Yejun pulled it out of his pocket, but before he could hand it to Hamin, a flash of blue snatched it from his hand.
The water spirit held onto the cube, refusing to go near the group.
“Hey! What's the matter with you?” Noah groaned from where he laid. “We just saved your World! We need that!”
Yejun carefully approached the blue orb. “...Is something the matter?”
The water spirit looked in between the three and then drifted towards Yejun slowly. It chirped towards him and for a moment, Hamin saw Yejun's face change into a dark expression. He couldn't help but shiver.
“Wait, you can't–”
In a moment, a bright light streaked the sky and a pulse of air went through Yejun.
The sky became bright and bright bubbles decorated it in streams. The sea creatures in the city began to sing woeful songs as they watched the bubbles rise, sad to watch the world go. Hamin looked over to Yejun, watching tears flood down his face as the glowing blue spirit disappeared in a stream of bubbles.
The next World was dark, neon signs painting the buildings and sidewalks to the city. No matter how long they stayed, the concept of daylight did not exist in this World. They had traveled for what seemed like days, dodging the sights of static monsters and sleeping on shadowed rooftops. During that time, Hamin tried to collect his thoughts. First that moving mannequin and then the water spirit. Something was connecting him to these people. Both Yejun and Noah seemed to know him, but on the other hand, they also recognized each other.
They talked quietly amongst each other as they traveled, sharing stories about their Worlds. Yejun’s quiet life was described as otherworldly; his world living in an underwater atmosphere with a modern way of life. Noah’s was more of a fantasy as he could use magic and lived in medieval times. But in each other’s World, they had both existed. Hamin couldn’t make heads or tails about the situation. Was this next life going to have a version of them too?
A high-pitched screech gathered their attention and as they hid under a terrace, they watched a pink light fly by with a group of mass of static run after it in the street. It streaked up and down the city, always almost reaching the top of a building before skating down it to gather speed and zip by the amalgamation.
“Is that…?” Yejun whispered.
“It has to be.” Noah answered. “Hamin-ah, we have to go save them!”
Hamin wanted to protest, but there was no denying that this was the next person they had to save, along with their World. A loud shake made them look back to the scene and they watched the pink streak get knocked back and fly back.
“Noah!” Yejun called, thrusting his hand out to create a soft landing. Noah immediately casted a soft levitation spell on the ball and safely let it down to the ground. It was another person. He looked up, perplexed at what had just happened.
His mouth flapped up and down until words finally came out. “What–who…what’s going on?!”
“There’s no time to explain.” Hamin helped him up, dragging him to a blind spot. “We’re here to help.”
A loud roar shook the air. It was going to go on a rampage again. The pink-haired man gathered the three of them close.
“We need to try and destroy the anomaly as fast as we can. If it gets any bigger, we’ll be thrown into infested sectors below us. If you’re gonna hit it, do it hard. Its regeneration ability is slow.” A digital screen flashed and he swiped over it, creating a map of the city they were in. “I’ll try to lure it far from the bridge. Try to focus on strong offensive attacks or defensive skills.”
It didn’t take long for the group to understand the situation and they all agreed readily. Yejun focused on healing and shielding, while Hamin would tank through the front with Noah ready with duelist magic. And the newest member, Bamby, would use defensive tactics.
Another loud call signaled its attack and the four of them scattered. Noah took Yejun to the rooftops, keeping him away from danger. Hamin stuck close to Bamby, watching him grab a metal scrapped up board from the ground.
“Try to keep your attacks towards the city.” Bamby muttered. “We can’t risk falling over the edge.
And with a brisk kick of air, he shot off on the board. This meant that the fight had begun.
The pink light flickered before blazing bright. It circled the monster a couple of times to catch its attention and then began to blitz farther into the street. It worked as the monster roared and tried to crawl its way to Bamby.
Hamin jumped through the portal that Noah made and was launched into the air, to fall right on the digital monster. He channeled a will to stretch code around his leg, making an ungenerated leg gauntlet and quickly cut through a chunk of the monster's body. It screamed, waving long arms to hit the mosquito that bit it.
Hamin dodged, jumping behind Yejun’s shields as the blocks of static rolled off the transparent orb. Noah tapped his back and Hamin sprinted forward. He fought against the pulsing cubes and waves of attacks that came after it. Noah used elemental magic against it, using ice and earth to spear and freeze upcoming attacks.
The monster had a feeling that it was going to lose and began to attack blindly, hitting Bamby mid-air and Yejun’s safe spot. Hamin sprinted to Yejun’s position, catching his falling form as he did. Bamby was also caught by Noah, a shield rolling them away from any more attacks.
“This,” Noah panted. “Feels impossible. It feels like we haven’t even made a dent.”
“Well, what do you suggest?” Bamby groaned, nursing his leg as Yejun healed it.
“We need firepower!” Noah growled. “There’s no way we can–!”
A sound of a motorcycle revving caught their attention and Hamin looked over to see a red streak circling the monster before fire appeared and attacked it. It was effective to the point where the monster shrieked, collapsing on its side.
“Where did they come from?!” Noah screamed.
“Doesn’t matter.” Hamin pushed past him. “We’ll take all the help we can get.”
Hamin could practically feel the glare that Noah sent him. A portal was opened and Yejun and Bamby jumped through it. Another safe point was made and Bamby shot around the city buildings to survey the situation.
It didn’t take long for the monster to recover and it slapped down an attack that shifted the earth. Noah launched Hamin into the air, watching another flurry of attacks cut cleanly through blocks of black and grey. Meanwhile, flashes of yellow and red clashed as they attacked as well.
The size of the monster was decreasing steadily and when it was the size of a small house, they regrouped to get any healing done and optimize their plan. Hamin felt dirt and sweat plastered on his forehead and waited patiently for Yejun to dump a bubble of water on him. A splotch of pink moved in his peripheral and as he turned his head, a gray shadow sat atop of Bamby’s retreating figure.
“Look out!”
The motorcyclist pushed Bamby and a fist of digital mass landed right Bamby had been standing. This caused the group to scatter, trying to avoid the oncoming attacks. Hamin kicked away an incoming block and tried to spot the rest of the group. Yejun was providing back-up to Noah, as he casted a shield upon them. Hamin looked around, tapping his temple to activate his goggles. He couldn’t find any weak spots and the monster grew larger as it consumed its surroundings.
The ground shook and Hamin felt his skin grow hot. The spot where the man had been hit exploded and fire erupted from the ground. The man stepped out from the crater, his helmet broken with an eye visible. A redstreak flashed and rocketed towards the monster. It took less than a second before it exploded in a hot wave.
Hamin tried to shield himself behind a rusted car, trying to minimize any burns. A cooling sensation washed over him and he saw Yejun’s water shield covering his body. He spotted the pink haired man, struggling to cover himself with a metal scrap. Hamin ran towards him, grabbing him by the shoulders and wrapped him close to his body. The shield could only cover him so much, so that left him to use himself.
Fifteen seconds felt so much longer than it sounded. Hamin had shut his eyes, waiting for the heat to die down and when it did, he couldn’t help but wait for something else to happen. Was it over? Was it gone? Hamin unfurled his arms around Bamby and peeked over the metal scrap.
Where the monster was, stood the motorist. Flames decapitated from his body and after it was finally done, he fell to the ground. Bamby was the first to move. He sprinted over to the man, skidding to a halt when he reached him. Hamin followed suit and the other two walked over cautiously.
“Hey!” Bamby shook the man. “You–what’re you…you’re stupid!”
Despite the insults, he had tears flowing down his face. His fists were curled and laid on the white haired chest, unmoving. Yejun quickly began to use his healing powers to try and heal him. His eyebrows furrowed and he grunted as he pushed his hands down onto him. The injured man groaned.
“His wounds…!” Yejun growled. “They’re too severe! If I can just…!”
Hamin remembered when he had connected with Noah’s magic and without hesitating, he placed his hands over Yejuns.
A pulse. A faint memory. A calm washing sensation.
The copied power began to work within him and he pushed it back out, hoping that the healing would be doubled. The blue glow faded and the white haired man opened his eyes.
“Ugh,” He groaned. “Did we win?”
Bamby threw his arms around Eunho, sobbing as he did. “You idiot! You’re always so reckless!”
The man looked confused, patting the smallest back softly. Bamby let go after a while, struggling to wipe away the flood that escaped his eyes.
“Ah, I’m so glad to see you again, Eunho. But how did you…?”
“I’m sorry,” He interrupted. “Do I know you?”
The other three began to feel very awkward as Bamby’s face changed.
“What do you mean? It’s me, Bam–Bonggu! Don’t you remember me?”
‘Eunho’ shook his head. “I lost my memory a while ago. I’ve been trying to find out who I was before, but after everyone disappeared…”
The group was silent. It had happened to all of them. The empty World moving on while the people ceased to exist. The ground rumbled slightly and the five of them became alert once more. From the ground, two streaks spiraled into the sky. Hamin realized it was a Restore Point, but there were two?
Before he could react, the twin spears twirled back down and hit both Eunho and Bamby in the chest. The World shook once more and a bright light flashed open in the sky. Another rift. Bamby straightened himself up, ready to fight whatever else was about to attack him, but nothing came. Eunho sat on the ground, perplexed at the situation.
Suddenly, a blue portal opened up beneath the group. It dropped them into another dimension. Hamin looked around the space. It was like they had entered a new dimension. The sky was filled with glittering stars and planets, shooting stars lit the sky as they passed, and the ground glowed as they walked. A soft call caught his attention, echoing in his ear. As the rest of the group explored and went on without him, he laid eyes on a figure. They stood off in the distance, dressed in white. He couldn’t decipher their features, but his heart stirred.
You smiled at him, a melancholic look softening your features. He had come so far on this journey. You remembered the look he had given as you wiped and reset his code. You made sure that it didn’t hurt. There was no future in Caelum as long as they existed. So you gave them one. His memories would never be the same. Only the ones in the present and future mattered.
You didn’t say anything, fearing that your resolve would crumble when you did. But the look in his eyes said everything to you. I will come find you.
You let out a soft chuckle, unable to hold it back any longer. Noah called out to Hamin. A portal was opening up. With one last look back, Hamin retreated to the safety of his new family. They stepped through the portal, unsure what laid ahead of them.
~ ~
In a field of flowers, you stood alone. You watched him go, the one you had to leave behind. If he ever walked your way, you knew that he would find you.
You closed your eyes, smiling at the memories you were about to leave behind.
‘Come and find me.’ You wished. ‘In a World where we can be together.’
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Things that are still unresolved, with only one more episode this season and no guarantee of another season to come:
Poppy, Storm, and the baby
Poppy & Ian
Ian and his resignation from MQ
Brad/Anna and the malware
Jo and where she stands with MQ and/or Dana
Dana, Yara, and Dana's new version of Twilight Forest
David's job and MQ in general
Rachel and her position at MQ
Elysium and the original Twilight Forest
Carol/Mikey and Andy
Even though everything doesn't need to be wrapped up in the finale, that's still a lot of dangling threads...
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Oh, computer.
× @malware-learningfrenchslender
*It is just. Laying there. On the forest floor*
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Okay, this part of the forest seems thicker. I must be going the wrong way... I should turn around.
*They're walking around with a VERY full backpack, holding a small digital journal.*
× @malware-learningfrenchslender
*Crane appears behind them. Why? Who knows.*
Hello there.
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FOREST SURVIVOR CHALLENGE! (Sidemascots 2.7)
Previously on Sidemascots Season 2…
The crew, when trying to find where the heck Tina is, found a computer installed with malware Sumi installed which transported them to the backrooms, after a lucky survival there, the crew got transported to “the white void”, opened a door, and got through another black hole. This is where we left off.
The Sidemascots Season 2
Version 2.07 – The Forest
Only on @thesidemascots
(Amazon Forest, Brazil)
Everyone: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(Everyone falls into the forest)
Miraitowa: Wh-wha? You guys alright? Guys?
Burke: Yes! I’m okay! I’m just being faceplanted into mud that smells like Brazil.
Wenlock: Maybe we’re IN Brazil!
Borobi: Could be Australia…
Wenlock: Dude, does it has as much koalas as what you imagined, MATE?!
Borobi: Maybe not.
Sacha: Brazil? Ooh, ooh, ooh, maybe we can find Vinicius in there!
Burke: Vinicius? Didn’t you remember that we’re in a SIMULATION?
Miraitowa: But maybe it couldn’t. We got there through a black hole. That might be the end point.
Burke: Okay but I think there are MULTIPLE stages in this maze, not just two!
Miraitowa: Sigh… I believe you… for once. Let’s find a way to get out of there.
Borobi: Using strings again mate?
Miraitowa: Unfortunately, we ran out of strings. Are you?
Borobi: I have 1mm mate!
Burke: WHAT THE F*CK IS A MILLIMETER?
Miraitowa: Let’s go together… for now.
Honohon: Sure thing… but what way?
Miraitowa: -_-
Day 1
(Everyone walks through the forest)
Sacha: I’m hungry! I need to stuff a goddamn pizza in my mouth right now!
Burke: This is survival, Sacha, the only way we can have food is to hunt down and eat!
Wenlock: I don’t have a mouth anyway!
Miraitowa: How do you even speak then?
Wenlock: Uhhh… uhm…
Honohon: Oh look, a tiger!
Sacha: Let me figh-
Burke: Shhhhh… If we’re not careful enough we might get mauled.
Miraitowa: Fair point. Considering YOU ate all of Wenlock’s baked beans!
Olympic Phryge: Hey!
Sacha: Stop! She’s really hungry you know!
Miraitowa: Okay, okay, gee…
Burke: Alright… what should we do with the tiger?
Hodori: TIGER MUKBANG!!!
Olympic Phryge: Uhhhhhh, a mukbang about cannibalism?
Hodori: … I’m out of here!
Miraitowa: WAIT! OR ELSE WE GET LOST!
Burke: Nah leave him alone. He deserved to stuck in this maze.
Sacha: Eh.
Miraitowa: Alright, the tiger’s still in front of us, we need to hunt this down.
Borobi: Wait a second…
Wenlock: I don’t know what he meant but I agree.
(They all walk a little further until the tiger suddenly turns and attacks Miraitowa)
Miraitowa: HELP ME!
Honohon: What the actual f*ck?
Miraitowa: IT BURNED MY NOSE!
Olympic Phryge: How does a tiger burn his nose-
Burke: That can be an issue.
Gliz: Can we kill it now?
Miraitowa: Do we have any choice?
Olympic Phryge: Nahhhhhh
Cobi: I guess no.
Wenlock: Here, have my last bean.
Miraitowa: Yummy, thanks!
Olympic Phryge: Heyyyyyy... Leave some for me.
Wenlock: Yeah, let's hunt this down!
Gliz: WOOOOOOOOO!
Milo: I'm scared...
Miraitowa: Uhhhhh... Burke.
Burke: What?
Miraitowa: Are one-legged stoats like Milo edible?
Burke: Not that I'm aware of, but if I were you I'd stay away from the weirdly colored creatures.
Miraitowa: What color is weird for you?
Burke: All colors are weird.
(Oly is about to throw up)
Sacha: Okay, enough talking. Let's just catch this tiger and move on.
Gliz: Agreed.
Honohon: We gotta move, or else we will starve!
Gliz: Okay!
Cobi: Here, pusspusspuss, come here.
(Tiger growls and lunges at Cobi)
Cobi: Oh f*ck!
Burke: Run, run, run, run, RUN!
Honohon: Come on, everyone, this way!
(Everyone runs towards the left side, except for Cobi, who runs straight into a tree)
Cobi: OW!
Tiger: Growl growl
(Tiger jumps onto Cobi, biting his head and shaking him)
Cobi: Get him off me, get him off me!
(Everyone runs back to her and tries to help, but they all end up getting bitten by the tiger)
Burke: What are we supposed to do?
Wenlock: Try harder?!
Cobi: My head is getting all numb!
Burke: Okay, we've tried everything, so we'll have to kill the tiger.
Honohon: With what?!
Burke: We can use our bare hands.
Honohon: What if he kills us first?!
Burke: We'll be dead anyway if we don't do anything.
Cobi: Hurry, before I pass out!
Burke: OK, here goes.
(Burke runs over to the tiger, punches it, and throws it into a tree. Everyone else does the same, and eventually the tiger is defeated)
Cobi: Thank you so much.
Burke: No problem. Now let's cut him up and eat.
Everyone: HEAR HEAR!
Wenlock: Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
Burke: You're going to eat it or not?
Wenlock: Well yeah but still.
Olympic Phryge: Come on, we've been walking in the jungle for hours and haven't had a bite!
Wenlock: Alright.
(Everyone eats a small piece of tiger meat, and they all have a little smile on their faces)
Day 2
(Weeheeheehee dee heeheeheehee weeoh aweem away)
Miraitowa: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!
Burke: Gee, what the fuck?
Sacha: Morning guys.
Gliz: Yeah.
Borobi: G'day mate.
Honohon: We made breakfast.
Burke: What is it?
Sacha: Fried spider legs.
(Oly throws up... again)
Burke: Gross.
Wenlock: I like it.
Cobi: You sure it's edible?
Sacha: Yeah, the spider was green and purple.
Burke: Those aren't edible colors.
Miraitowa: Shut it!
Gliz: Let's keep moving, or else we're gonna be stuck here forever!
Everyone: YEAH!
(Everyone gets up and starts walking again)
Olympic Phryge: Oh, hey, a waterfall.
Borobi: Oooh, looks cool.
Burke: Wait. I have a feeling something's wrong with this.
Gliz: Why?
Burke: It's too quiet.
Honohon: Oh come on.
Miraitowa: Wait a minute, I hear something.
(Everyone stops and listens)
Sacha: I don't hear anything.
Olympic Phryge: Hmmmmmm...
Burke: Well I do, and I think it's coming from the waterfall.
Honohon: There's something inside there.
Miraitowa: Alright. Let's check it out.
(Everyone walks over to the waterfall, and sees a bunch of glowing eggs)
Sacha: Whoa.
Miraitowa: Looks cool.
Olympic Phryge: Let's crack these eggs and see what's inside!
Honohon: Don't eat the yolks though.
Cobi: Agreed.
(Everyone grabs an egg and cracks it open. The yolk inside is red, and everyone immediately drops the eggs in shock)
Sacha: It's blood.
Milo: NO!
Burke: Blood doesn't glow like that
Olympic Phryge: Then what is it?
Wenlock: Oh dear.
Burke: I've heard of this before. Glowing red yolks. These are the eggs of the red death.
Cobi: I've heard of that.
Wenlock: Oh no.
Miraitowa: Don't tell me that's what I think it is.
Milo: WAH?!!
Burke: Yes. A very large and venomous snake that eats people alive.
Sacha: Oh no.
Honohon: No.
Miraitowa: NO.
Burke: Yes. It's a huge monster that lives in the depths of the Amazon.
Sacha: I hate snakes.
Burke: It's not just a snake, it's the devil himself.
Milo: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Olympic Phryge: Oh no...
Sacha: Wait... am I the devil myself too?
Wenlock: We are so doomed.
Burke: No, we aren't. Because it's asleep, and it can't wake up unless it senses something living.
Cobi: Which is why the glowing yolks.
Burke: Exactly.
Olympic Phryge: But how can we be so sure it's not awake?
Burke: We can't.
(Everyone is silent for a while)
Honohon: Should we try to get out of here?
Miraitowa: Well... I guess there's no other option.
Burke: Alright, but let's go quietly.
(Everyone starts walking again, quietly)
Burke: Shush...
(A twig snaps)
Burke: SHUT UP!
(They hear a hissing sound)
Gliz: OH GOD.
(Everyone turns around and sees the Red Death slithering towards them)
Gliz: RUN!
Burke: TOO LATE.
(The Red Death lunges at them, and they all run away screaming)
Milo: OW! MY LEG!
Miraitowa: OH GOD.
Honohon: OH GOD.
Gliz: HELP US!
Borobi: SAVE OUR SKINS, MATE!
Olympic Phryge: THIS IS WAY WORSE THAN @crackheadfromsainsburys!
Cobi: WE'RE DONE FOR.
Sacha: WHAT THE HELL DO WE DO NOW?!
Burke: RUN AWAY FROM THE SNAKE AND SCREAM.
Gliz: HOLY SHIT!
Miraitowa: BURKE, DO SOMETHING!
Burke: Uhhhhh… yes! (shapeshifts himself into a… snake mother?)
Burke: HAVE YOU FINISHED YOUR HOMEWORK, TIMMY????
Red Death: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (runs away)
Day 3
Miraitowa: Thank god none of us are infected from that snake yesterday… except Milo.
Wenlock: YOU’LL NEVER GOING TO DO ANYTHING IF YOU'RE SCARED, F**KING MILO!
Milo: I'M NOT A FIGHTING KOALA!
Honohon: Yeah, we get it.
Olympic Phryge: Hey, look. Another waterfall.
Burke: We're not falling for that, Phryge.
Olympic Phryge: Oh.
Miraitowa: Let's go somewhere else.
(They all continue walking)
Cobi: Uhhh, guys.
Wenlock: Yeah, yeah.
Cobi: I found something.
Gliz: What?
Cobi: Look.
(Everyone turns around and looks at what Cobi is pointing at)
Honohon: What the f*ck is that?
Gliz: Looks like some kind of...
Sacha: Portal?
Gliz: Yeah.
Borobi: Maybe it's a trap.
Olympic Phryge: Nah. It's a portal.
Cobi: You never know.
Honohon: We're not falling for that either, right?
Burke: Well, it's the only thing that might get us out of this place, so I guess we'll have to.
Wenlock: What if it's dangerous?
Burke: Oh well.
(Everyone walks up to the portal and stands in front of it)
Miraitowa: Alright, everybody, let's do this!
Everyone: 3, 2, 1, GO!
(They all jump through the portal)
(Amazon Forest, Brazil)
Sacha: HOLY SH*T!
Cobi: What the actual f*ck?
Burke: Wait a minute guys... we got fooled.
Miraitowa: -_-
Sacha: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH WHAT’S THE MEANING OF THIS????
Day 4
Burke: ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, DO NOT TRUST ANYTHING YOU’RE SEEING! PHRYGE, DON’T LEAD US TO ANOTHER WATERFALL, NOR ANOTHER PORTAL! I’M SICK OF ALL OF THIS SH*T!
Cobi: I wonder how’s it going with Hodori?
Burke: NEVER LOOK FOR HIM!
Miraitowa: Or maybe we will.
Burke: …
(One long decision later)
Everyone: Hodori, where are you?!
Wenlock: Are you doing cannibalism?
Miraitowa: PLEASE, COME TO US! WE GOT STUFF TO DO!
Olympic Phryge: Are you making friends with tigers?
Sacha: Or are you doing cannibalism mukbang?! Burke: Ewwwwwwwwwww…
Miraitowa: Nah he’s going to make some views out of primitive mukbang.
Burke: PRIMITIVE MUKBANG??? DOES HE HAVE A PHONE, AND A STABLE INTERNET CONNECTION???
Miraitowa: Uhhhhh… wait, I saw someone…
Everyone: SOMEONE?!
Burke: Let me see…
(Everyone followed that person)
Miraitowa: Hm? Wah!
(Everyone saw deforestation in awe)
Borobi: WHAT MONSTER FORCED THEM TO DESTROY ALL OF THIS MATE???
Burke: Nah, at least now we know it’s the Amazon forest…
Sacha and Olympic Phryge: Eh.
Wenlock: What about we talk to them mate?
Miraitowa: No!
Wenlock: Why not?
Miraitowa: They don’t understand our language!
Olympic Phryge: What if they are a bit nice to us?
Wenlock: We should try to make some contact.
Burke: ARE YOU STUPID?
Sacha: Eh?!
Borobi: What’s wrong?
Burke: THEY DON'T SPEAK F**KING ENGLISH!
Olympic Phryge: O-Okay.
Miraitowa: Let me try to speak with them.
Wenlock: Mirai, no-
(A bulldozer points a Mirai)
Miraitowa: Okie… dokie…
(Everyone walks backwards)
Burke: Alright, let’s not forget why we’re here in the first place.
Sacha: Find Hodori? But this forest is vast.
Miraitowa: Sigh… what are we doing?
(3 hours later)
Burke: Guys, guys, GUYS!!!
Gliz: Gee, what’s wrong?
Burke: I saw a tiger!
Miraitowa: A tiger? Pffft… Same strategy as last time?
Wenlock: SAME STRATEGY? Did you remember that you almost got mauled by a FREAKING TIGER?
Miraitowa: No? Seriously, All I remember nowadays is green. Just green.
Wenlock: Green? Are you implying that this forest could be the BBC’s set for sports coverage… every year?!
Miraitowa: No?
Burke: Let’s just go after that tiger.
Wenlock: You heard him, boys. Let the hunt begin.
Gliz: Okay, but if I die, tell Neve that he is a baka.
Burke: He is not a baka.
Sacha: Is that the tiger?
Milo: Where?!
Wenlock: Oh no, the tiger is going after someone…
(Everyone gasps)
Sacha: Who is the person?
Burke: Let me zoom up a little bit.
(Burke zoomed)
Burke: It seems that it is a young adult tiger…
(Everybody gasped)
Burke: HOLY CR*P! It is Hodori!
Wenlock: Well, let the hunt continue.
Milo: And, what if we fail again?
Wenlock: Then the entire world will blame us for this.
Burke: The entire world???
Sacha: Well, not me.
Burke: Same here.
Olympic Phryge: Me too.
Wenlock: Anyways, the hunt continues.
Miraitowa: So, what if I go after the tiger with Gliz and Milo, while you go after Hodori?
Wenlock: Great idea!
Sacha: I can go after Hodori too, so that if one of us is injured, we will have more backup.
Wenlock: Perfect! Now, let the hunt begin.
Hodori: Hey, you want a bite, t-tiger?
Tiger: (ROAR)
Hodori: Wait, do tigers eat kangaroos?
Tiger: (ROAR)
Hodori: Ok then, eat a piece, and don't kill me please!
Tiger: (Munching noises)
(The tiger is eating Hodori's leg)
Hodori: Ow, ow, ow!
Tiger: (ROAR)
(Then the tiger starts mauling Hodori)
Hodori: Please, spare me, please!
Tiger: (Growls)
Hodori: I am innocent! I never did anything to you, right?
(Then the tiger jumps on top of Hodori, and starts to claw at his face)
Hodori: OW! OWWWWWW! PLEASE STOP! I'LL DO ANYTHING TO YOU! JUST DON'T KILL ME!
Tiger: (Roars)
Hodori: I'M YOUR BROTHER!
(The Tiger starts realizing and cries and ran away)
Sacha: Wow... absolute CINEMA.
Olympic Phryge: @kurosaiko12 is going to have a field day after this
Burke: Yeah, shut up and let's find Hodori.
Olympic Phryge: Oh yeah...
Burke: So, the tiger is over there, crying?
Sacha: Looks like that.
Wenlock: So, the hunt begins!
(Burke, Wenlock, and Sacha walked towards Hodori)
Hodori: What are you-
Burke: Heyo!
Hodori: Woah, what?
Burke: You alright?
Hodori: Yeah, I'm good.
Wenlock: So, the tiger didn't killed you, right?
Hodori: Y-yeah.
Sacha: That was an intense moment for me.
Hodori: Well, thank you, all of you, for saving me.
Burke: We're a team, Hodori. THE SIDEMASCOTS!
Hodori: Yes... but you were all trying to win a medal, while I was lost in this forest.
Burke: Yes, we're all on a quest to find you.
Olympic Phryge: How are things going with your tiger friend, by the way?
Hodori: They are good.
Wenlock: Glad to hear it, Hodori.
Sacha: We also got to know each other better.
Hodori: Really?!
Sacha: Really.
Burke: Hey, is the tiger still hungry?
Hodori: No? I fed them with berries I stole from the locals!
Burke: YOU FOUND THE LOCALS?
Miraitowa: Us too! But we couldn’t communicate, even threated to thrash us.
Hodori: But I learned Portuguese with them!
Everyone: Woah…
Olympic Phryge: Say something in Portuguese!
Hodori: Olá, bom dia ou onde quer que você esteja no mundo, você está assistindo aos SIDEMASCOTS DE PRÓXIMA GERAÇÃO! Bravo!
(Everyone collapses)
Day 5
Burke: Day #5: Find the locals who’re definitely still cutting down the forest to find answers on where the f**k are we in order to escape from the hell once AND for all!
Miraitowa: Did you forgot that we’re in a maze?!
Burke: What maze?
Olympic Phryge: You know, the maze Sumi set for us to wander around while finding Tina?
Wenlock: Since then Milo is dying after being bit by a venomous snake 3 days ago. He’s as conscious as dough.
Burke: Why are we still here… just to suffer…
Miraitowa: Don’t just stuck here and suffer in existential crisis! It’s like the Sidemascots itself, some of them are good, some of them sucks, but ultimately we had to go through all of it. Never give up until we find something, something that is, even if we can’t find Tina, Vinicius or even Sumi, at the very least we can get out of mess.
Burke: *sniffs* I don’t know what to do man… we’re going to stuck here forever…
Sacha: Burke, even if you’re stuck here forever, at least we’re together.
Burke: thanks guys… NOW LET’S GET OUT OF THIS HELL!
Everyone: YEAH!!!
(walking sounds)
Hodori: *gasps* A local! Gotta talk to him now!
Miraitowa: HODORI WAIT!
Hodori: Hola-
(Gets smacked in the face)
Powder: *gasps* HODORI, IS THAT YOU? HOW DID YOU GET THERE!
Miraitowa: OMG, OMG, OMG, A MASCOT!!!!
Powder: WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE?! HOW DID YOU GUYS GET HERE?!
Burke: Oh… we’re the…
NEXT-GEN SIDEMASCOTS!
Burke: Wheeeeeew! It’s been FOREVER since we did that intro!
Miraitowa: It’s only been 6 days…
Burke: Oh… sorry. Heh.
Olympic Phryge: How did you get here?
Powder: Well…
(flashback)
News co-anchor: Breaking News: 13 people are reported to have been missing for the past 3 days: Vinicius, Sumi, Tina, Burke, Miraitowa, Wenlock, Borobi, Honohon, Olympic Phryge, Salima, Cobi, Hodori, Gliz and Milo.
Powder: What?
Another co-anchor: What a coincidence, isn’t it, all of them are mascots, in fact, they’re all part of the popular YouTube group called “Sidemascots”, they are all last seen by locals walking into a now-abandoned house in Whistler, BC, which was formerly owned by Sumi.
Powder: Wait a minute…
(One flight later)
Police officer: Everyone stay back and do not go closer to this. We have people entering here for the investigation and got sucked in a mysterious black hole there.
Citizen: Did you contact anyone who got sucked there?
Police officer: No we do not, nor do we know when will they come back, do not go there if you want your loved ones intact, go home!
Powder: I’m going!
Police officer: It’s too risky here, go home!
Powder: Sir, I have the capacity to save people here.
Police officer: It’s dangerous- NO, NO, NO!
(Powder ran into the haunted house, bust opened the door and found a computer screen)
Powder: Hmmm…
Police officer: DON’T TOUCH IT-
Bonzi: Oh look, another guest to our lovely paradise!
(The officer ran away)
Bonzi: Our visitors our enjoying our paradise, including your friends… wanna join? [Yes/yes]
Powder: So long as I can save my friends, and other people… I accept.
(Powder clicked on “Yes” and jumped into the black hole it opened)
Powder: I’m coming for you…
(Flashback ends)
Miraitowa: Wait… LOADS of people are stuck in this maze?
Powder: Yeah! 48 of them!
Everyone: Woah…
Burke: Do you have your inventions?
Powder: Yes I have! It’s the… HELICOPTER IN A BAG!
Miraitowa: She’s like that gadget cat from the future, don’t you think?
Sacha: Uhhhhh…
Burke: Wait, what about Milo?!
Powder: Oh don’t worry, I have the medicine so advanced not even Microsoft’s Majorana 1 can figure this out! Just take Milo with you!
Everyone: HEAR HEAR!
Wenlock: Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…
(Powder throws the gadget and turns into a full-sized helicopter)
Powder: Hop in, boys!
Everyone: YEAH!
(“Helikopter” by Fazlija plays)
Burke: WOOHOO! BACK HOME!
Miraitowa: Or at least, the maze version of it.
Burke: SHUT UP!
Powder: Ahhhhhh… the beautiful Rio de Janeiro scenery… and what’s that giant octopus doing over here?
Miraitowa: OH NO, THAT WAS THE REAL STAGE THIS WHOLE TIME?!
Burke: WE’VE BEEN FOOLED! FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLED!
(One of the tentacles grabbed the helicopter)
Powder: Woah oh…
(The octopus throws the helicopter)
Everyone: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
The Sidemascots will return
#mascotverse#sidemascots#parody#vinicius and tom#miraitowa and someity#possibly controversial#the phryges#forest#survival#nature
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Volume 4 - Post #6: Count your blessings
Another installment in this ongoing serialized fanfic
Genre: Mandalorian x Fem! Reader
Total word count: 2K (sixth post in Volume 4)
Rating: Explicit - smut, language, +18 *NSFW*
_______________________________
VI. It takes the better part of a day to hide the Razor Crest under the tree canopy. At some point in the afternoon, you stop looking up from your work, expecting the Mandalorian to emerge from behind one of the tall ferns carpeting the forest floor. It often took him days to track down his quarry. He wouldn’t be back anytime soon.
Instead, you dig into another round of roasted fish and listen to Nito’s unsettling story about exactly how he gained access to the Imperial archive. Which involved the spouse of a sitting Galactic Senator and a dominatrix.
“My concern is that Mando didn’t properly contextualize this,” you say, picking a bone out from between your teeth. “You see, sometimes consenting adults want to pretend—it’s important that they’re just pretending—because everyone participating enjoys—”
“Ah! Stop!” He places all four hands over his ears.
“And for the record, I’m not against paying for sex work under ethical conditions. Especially in that kind of scenario where professional expertise—”
“Stop talking!”
“Okay. Okay,” you wave him down. “The only other thing I want to say, is that I encourage you to get comfortable with the basics and develop good communication before you think about exploring—”
The Ardennian throws a handful of fiddleheads at you. “What do I have to do to make you stop talking?!”
“Alright, I’m done! Just know I’m here, if and when you want to talk.”
“Sure,” Nito sneers. “Cause you and Mando are so great at communicating.”
“Wow!” You glare at him. “That was mean, little sidekick.”
“Sidekick?” He practically chokes on the word. “I am not your—don’t call me sidekick.”
“Yeah? Well, don’t start slinging shit around if you don’t want to step in it.”
You extend Nito a hand in truce and somehow manage to avoid slapping the condescending look off his face when he rolls his eyes.
“Right. So what did you learn from these uncensored records?”
Nito had already done an extensive amount of sleuthing on the HoloNet for site plans, handbooks, technical documents, senate committee reports, and whatever else he could find about the Empire’s coaxium production on Lakaran.
“When Ubaa Dir found us on Sriluur…I kept thinking about how the Tagge Corporation makes so much money. Everything they do is about cost-savings and shortcuts. There’s no way they would build a completely new operating system. They’ve just been overwriting and patching the old lines of Imperial code. And now I know which program they used.”
That makes you sit up straighter. “You mean…you did it? You designed something that can take over the refinery?”
“Not just the refinery,” Nito says excitedly. “The entire facility. Door locks, alarm protocols, climate control. I can turn the decorative fountains on and off if you want me to.”
“Nito, that’s—”
“A feat of astounding genius,” he finishes for you with a spectacularly smug look. The size of this kid’s ego probably generates its own gravity.
“Yes, I am humbled to be in the presence of such boundless intellect. Getting back to the malware you so ingeniously created. Are you saying all I have to do is launch this program, and you’ll have remote access to the operating system?”
Nito’s bad moods usually fall somewhere along the spectrum of sarcastic brat to sulky drama queen, but the way his nostrils flare, and eyes dilate is pure outrage. He looks absolutely livid.
“Uh, no. I’m not doing anything remotely,” he scoffs at the absurdity of your suggestion. “I need to be onsite to work on the TaggeCo network.”
“Look, Nito, I’m sorry about the snarky sidekick remark. I know it feels like being an equal member of the team means taking on equal risk, but—”
“Because I am!” He shouts. “You think my voice in your earpiece is all you need to splice into their systems? They will try to override my program with anything they can throw at it. You think Mando can deflect those kinds of attacks? Because you sure as hell can’t. You need me there.”
“That’s not our only responsibility, Nito. What are we going to do? Bring a toddler with us on a heist?”
“Yes!” Nito exclaims.
Your jaw drops open. “When Ubaa Dir’s fighters launch a ground assault to take the refinery, some dead-eyed TaggeCorp exec back on Coruscant is going to decide whether destroying the entire facility under the cover of some ‘industrial accident’ is better for their bottom line. And if we don’t have control of the network when they make that call, everyone will die. So, yeah, you’ll be talking to me through an earpiece because I don’t want you, or the kid, anywhere near.”
“And what if someone blocks the receiver signal, huh? What if you’re in a fight, it falls out and gets crushed? What then, Thuli?” He growls at you, jaw set with conviction. “Just because you’re scared doesn’t change the fact that you need me!”
Gods, you’re so bad at navigating conflict. Your body becomes so overwhelmed with anxiety that you actually stand up from your seat next to the fire and start pacing. The Child, who had been sleeping next to you on the blanket, stirs—eyes blinking wide in confusion.
“Of course, I’m scared! We’re jeopardizing the lives of innocent people. What? Were you hoping to startle me into some kind of epiphany?!”
The Child whimpers in distress, clinging to your knees until you pick him up. “I know you resent being back on babysitting duty—”
“He’s not a baby,” Nito snaps. “And I know you know that.”
“What—?”
“Okay, he might be a baby, but he’s not helpless. He can…do things,” Nito says in a hushed whisper. “And if I’ve seen it, I know you’ve seen it too.”
You draw in a sharp breath and drop your gaze toward the kid. But he’s already back asleep, contented in the safety of your arms.
So…we’re finally having this conversation. Part of you reflexively wants to deny it. Honor Mando’s wishes and say nothing. Convince Nito that it’s all a figment of his overactive imagination.
It’s painful realizing how comfortable you’ve become with dishonesty. How readily the lie springs to your lips. Erenada, this is what’s eating Humia alive—the compulsion to reach for deceit instead of truth, even when it serves no purpose.
“What have you seen him do?”
The tension in Nito’s posture melts away. Instead, he becomes alight with fascination, eager to share this memory he’d replayed in his mind countless times. He’s so excited he can barely think straight.
“Mando tracked his bounty to Numidian Prime, but the guy nearly shot us down from the sky. I was making repairs to the engine turbine…It was so humid out that all this moisture had collected on the wing. When I opened the injector panel, these mynock came out of nowhere. Just flew at my face, attacking me. And I slipped, but…I didn’t fall. Something…caught me. Some kind of force that held onto me.”
A force.
You recall seeing a shimmering wave when the Child moved the boulder to save Mando’s quarry trapped underneath. Like a haze over desert sand as he lifted the rock above the cave floor. And you’d thought that same thing—that it was a forcefield, somehow wielded by this tiny creature.
Nito’s shoulders slump. “It was him. He saved me.”
The kid’s mouth twitches, his hands opening and closing while he dreamed, blissfully unaware that he’s the subject of your whispered speculation. The Mandalorian may want to hide these abilities, but they couldn’t be contained.
“I’ve seen it, too,” you nod. “He lifted this boulder a thousand times his weight and size.”
“Do you know how he does it? I mean, you can do…stuff,” Nito raised all four arms helplessly. “You both have powers. How is it possible?”
“I—”
In this case, it’s probably best to leave the truth unspoken. If Nito knew what you were truly capable of—the things you'd done, the accidents—as a child? He would never look at you with that trusting gaze ever again. And you’re not ready to give that up.
“I’ve never heard of a Hapan able to manipulate inorganic matter. My power is tied to the connection between living things. I wield...physiology. Granted, I never finished my training. There is secret knowledge only practiced by the most revered sages. But I don’t know how he does it.”
“Can’t you just look inside his mind for answers?”
“No,” you shake your head. “I can’t read someone’s mind like pages in a book, Nito. If he were to focus on a particular thought or memory, I might witness it, but I can only sense emotion.”
Thinking back to that day in the cave, you remember, “He felt…sadness. And guilt. Maybe it was different that time…it took him a long time to access his power because he felt so conflicted about it. Not like with you and—he saved Mando, too—from a charging Mudhorn—”
Nito huffed, and a hateful smile spread across his face. “So you and Mando have known this whole time, and you never said anything to me?”
Fuck! Kriffing hell, there’s no avoiding this…so much for that trusting gaze.
“I—yes. Mando asked me never to speak about it, but I should have pushed back. You deserved to know. I’m sorry, Nito. I made a mistake.”
This did nothing to mollify the rage building up inside the Ardennian. He stomps forward to shove a finger in your face.
“Well, I don’t forgive you! I don’t know why Mando doesn’t trust me…but you didn’t push back because you liked sharing a secret with him. He’s the only thing you’ve ever cared about out.”
Your head snaps back as if you’d been slapped. “Nito, that’s not—”
“And he doesn’t even care enough about you to be here. Look around, Thuli. Mando’s not here. I am!”
Ouch! Okay, you might have deserved that. He’s right, after all. You’d been so touched that Mando trusted you with this secret, you hadn’t really thought about hurting Nito. But damn, did this kid have to rip your heart open to bury the knife in your chest?
“Can we talk about this without—?”
“Guess what,” Nito howls so loudly that the baby shudders awake, whimpering. “I don’t trust you guys either. You’re both too stupid to do this without me. I’m going to take down that network, and I’m bringing the kid with me.”
And he grabs the kid from your arms to tuck him into his apron pocket. With a theatrical twist of his shoulders, Nito stalks toward the Crest.
“Nito, I don’t know how to get you inside the refinery. Why do you think I’ve been mopping floors for the past two weeks? So that I can walk in through the front gate.”
He doesn’t even bother turning to look at you. “Then get me a transponder.”
“It doesn’t work that way!” You cry desperately after him. “There are checkpoints and scanners everywhere. I'm not wearing this thing as a costume prop!”
This time, he stops to give you an accusatory glare. “So what about Mando, eh? I bet you know how to get him inside.”
“Mando can get himself in, and I don’t think I need to explain how he’ll manage that.”
“Then, Mando can get me in, too. He brought us with him for the job on Coruscant.”
“That guy was a bureaucrat, Nito. TaggeCo has a private army! Why can’t you see that I’m trying to protect you?"
"No one asked you to! I've been taking care of myself for a long time."
And the almost imperceptible crack in Nito's voice as he stifled down a sob breaks what's left of your heart.
"But you shouldn't have to. You’re right! We are stupid. Let us be stupid while you are smart and stay out of danger.”
Nito is indifferent to your tears. “You don’t get to make that decision for me! You can’t do this without us, Thuli. Figure out how to get me into that operations center, or none of this works.”
It’s hard to believe that you started out the day excited.
**********
Continue reading: Volume 4-Post #7: Thrilling Tales of (Undercover) Emergency Medicine
Back to Volume 4 - all posts
#mandalorian x reader#mandalorian x you#the mandalorian smut#din djarin smut#din djarin#din djarin x reader
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tuesday again 2/20/2024
i don't usually use these writeups as a memory aid, but this week it's good bc most of last week was a blur of applying to jobs and playing breath of the wild
listening
i have several playlists that are several hours long with a couple different flavors of the really specific kind of instrumental music i need to do mass quantities of data entry. these are now all poisoned by horrible memories of my last two jobs so i'm slowly building new ones. a great candidate is OASIS, off the REDLINE soundtrack. REDLINE (2009, dir. Koike) is an extremely horny anime movie about driving really fast, being true to yourself in spite of corporate overlords, sports betting, and fucking.
youtube
i think this was a scene with background club or cafe music? electronica instrumental with a little bit of a groove and a very particular mid-aughts sound. you know when powder coating is extremely matte but also extremely sparkly? spotify.
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reading
Samantha Cole (previously Vice, co-founder of 404 Media) has a beat that's focused on sex tech, sex work, deplatforming of sex work, and kink community beefs that manages to be both detached and very, very kind. i trust her to write about any kink community in a respectful and fair way, and even when she visibly doesn't understand the appeal of a kink she writes about them in a respectful and fair way. a great example of this is the furry adult baby diaper community being deplatformed by patreon.
but her most recent investigation, "can this shitty vibrator actually give you malware?" is fascinating. any job that can legitimately claim vibrators as a buisness expense and perform a teardown is fascinating to me.
what a tremendous and endlessly fascinating world we live in.
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watching
there are many movies on tubi that i have like. name recognition of but have never actually seen, so i'm starting to work my way through things that aren't noir or obscure westerns. like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000, dir. Lee).
youtube
the practial effects in this movie are insane. the wirework is insane. wirework insane. this is the dreamiest and most beautiful chase/fight scene i've ever seen and they're zipping around a bamboo forest.
we're going to have to live with this imperfect screenshot ok this laptop is Extremely old. the interior sets often look like theater sets (complimentary). just a stunningly beautiful movie with the sickest action scenes you’ve ever seen. plot a little choppy but forgivable imo. i know this is regarded as one of the finest movies of all time, not just one of the finest martial arts movies of all times, so saying anything feels a little like giving it a dollar store plastic trophy. i liked it and i had fun. watching a critically acclaimed non-american good movie is good for the brain steeped in lackluster american westerns, i think.
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playing
much like in real life, in breath of the wild i am refusing to do much towards the main quest and am mostly puttering around looking for shit to upgrade my outfits.
unlocked rudania, did not go inside.
what's with this little. sword graveyard??? on the northeastern edge of the caldera??? the only thing on that island is an octorok?? did it kill like eight guys???
finished richard scarey's tarreytown :) including that horrible rich guy who wanted me to kill some guardians for ??? reasons. i am pretty confident about killing hinox (is the plural of hinox, hinox?), wizzrobes, and most lizalfos if i can get the drop on em but i am Not confident about killing actively moving guardians without guardian arrows, which is an expensive way of doing business. due to reliably one-shotting the wizzrobes with revali's bow, i am running into the interesting problem of always having a glut of magical weapons. which leads me to go fuck around the extreme hot and cold areas those magic weapons are good for. and less fucking around the normie areas i actually want to fuck around.
got the good sword at thirteen hearts, i stopped short at twelve hearts gone and the deku tree called me a pussy. i unfontunately did not screenshot that. hey did you know there's a korok on the deku tree's head whose life's purpose seems to be riddles?
:(
and now for quite a lot of horse talk.
dodged like four lynels taking Ganon's horse up the northern edge of the map to get a pic of the leviathan.
caught the white horse, we are such pretty pretty princesses together. i think it's very funny that the gerudo fanciest weapons and hylian royal regalia look so similar. purple and gold eternal.
did you know if you feed your horse an endura carrot you get extra spurs???
i was looking for a 5 star speed horse but after catching and releasing four different solid black horses this is the best one (4 str, 4 speed, 5 stamina) i found. maybe I’ll shoot for a bright chestnut with lots of chrome for my speedy horse, the equine equivalent of a red convertible.
very funky conincidence on the grasslands behind the lord of the mountain's spring. not identical, bc the lead horse doesn't have facial markings, but what are the odds of that huh. i wish grays in this game didn't look so chalky and washed out, i love a gray horse in real life.
i think it's some bullshit that you have to fight your way into this spring, get told "go get a dragon scale", deal with all that, fight your way BACK into the spring, and then be presented with a Major Test of Strength shrine. c'mon just give it to me!!!
game continues to be very bad at spitting out riders next to horses or donkeys EXCEPT!!! for this doctor. i didn't know hyrule had traveling doctors! i quite honestly didn't think they had the techonology, given that the state of medicine in hyrule is very mortar and pestle based!
the game gave me a tooltip like "make friends with dogs! they'll lead you to treasure!" and i was like What but it does actually work, you just have to target them in the camera first and then feed them several hunks of meat. bonkers game. how many other goddamn mechanics are there that i've missed???
next steps: shrine hunting. i have like 50 out of 120 which is wild to me. i played this game two years ago, got to about a hundred shrines, and managed to forget where they all fucking are. yes my shrine sensor is always on. there's probably at least twenty in central hyrule, which is not a place i touched much on my list playthrough, also the last two memories i need are in there. i have filled out a good chunk of the compendium (completely filled the materials pages) but idk if i will be a completionist about it. there are so so so so so many weapons variants. i am cheating a bit and looking up the animals i missed (mostly a lot of bugs and fish) but one of the entries is for patricia, the royal sand seal. i would not have ever thought to take a picture of the named sand seal, i'm sorry game but that's a bit obtuse.
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making
not much progress on the cross stitch or job fronts, but since i finally have a balcony, i planted peas and beans from @shiny-good-rock and basil from @morrak than have been languishing in a box for several years, the basil had an okay germination rate so my fingers are crossed re: peas and beans.
i am a bit annoyed about marigolds. maybe it's a bit too early for them here, or maybe they're not as popular as they were in the northeast? i tried like five different big box stores and indie nurseries, only one indie nursery had any and they were very pest-ridden. i would like marigolds, as friends for my tomatoes.
it is currently 11:40 PM CST as i type this so tomorrow i'll add something with a garden layout and what varieties i planted.
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ben 10 fic idea
kevin and ben (classic series but with feedback)
being alone in the world
reasons:
A. Gwen and max die saving ben/Kevin from vilgax
B. Ben just left with Kevin in his appearance episode
C. kidnaped/trafficked
D. ben lost Gwen and max and is trying to find them with Kevin's help (would probably be set before Kevin's first appearance)
E. ben just got the omnitrix and was terrified of what Gwen and Max would think of him becoming alien monsters and ran away in fear at some point meeting Kevin (probably at the beginning of the story)
F. ben ran away after being fused with feedbacks DNA during the malware even
if something like this exists please tell me =]
prompt for F:
so it goes around the same except as malware is pulling feedback out of the omnimatrix the timeline changes
Malware was suddenly hit by something (gwen magic or max weapon) causing the DNA he was pulling out of the omnitrix to fuse into bens normal DNA making him a (to ben) horrifying fusion between a Conductoid and human
in fear of himself ben ran off into the forest abandoning Gwen and Max
after a while he ended up at a camp where people where running away from something still trying to be a hero ben tried to ask what they where running from but only made the people's fear worse
he soon found out it was kevin they where running from who had only recently left the knull void (did they ever say how idk)
end prompt: you go from here i ran out of idea
also to my knowledge Gwen cant do tracking spells yet so this is here incase she can
Gwen tried to find ben with a tracking spell but it didn't work as his DNA was to messed up to be recognised
#b 10#ben 10#kevin ethan levin#kevin levin#ben tennyson#benjamin tennyson#omnitrix#ben 10 prompt#ben 10 feedback#ben fused with feedback
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Reyn sighed. They were standing outside a mostly rundown old house near the slaughter twin’s forest. Already annoying for the fact they cannot leave until the wendigo in this area is dealt with. They sighed once again, and turned around and started walking away. They were not taking this hunt, Jackie was. They have had way too many hunts recently and bribed Jackie to do it instead of them. Now, they were walking through the forest mindlessly knowing there was no cryptids. Bloodmoon would never allow cryptids to venture into this forest. They didn’t really want to visit the overly enthusiastic twins at the moment, so they instead just walked throughout the less hunted in parts of the forest.
Twigs snapped under their feet but they didn’t care. They were having too good of a time not constantly having to watch for malicious eyes wanting their skin, and they will enjoy this while they can. Never had they once been in a forest other than this one where they didn’t have to worry about the ones they were sent to kill, and having this moment after weeks of nonstop hunting trips was a godsend.
@reyndesilly (malware can appear in anyway u like, idc if he wants to rip Reyn’s spine out or wants to talk-)
[something rumbles from the dark branches above, a single, completely purple eye narrowing at the newcomer, the form the eye belongs to blacked out due to the low lighting]
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The CRK Fandom Wiki had added fake ads and they're all really funny
The ONE SIMPLE TRINK links to the page about the shop. The GET CRYSTALS NOW links to a YouTube video saying you got April Fool'd
This just says "FLOUR FLOUR FLOUR FLOUR FLOUR" in some language (I google Translated)
First link links to the page on the Cake Shop, the second one links to Wedding Cake Cookie's page
Clicking "sure" leads you to the gacha page. Clicking "nah" send you to the Genishin wiki
(speaking of, there's a random Genshin ad)
Clicking "REPORT MALWARE" links to Croissant Cookie's page
Mushroomcookie.com actually leads to a YouTube video
Links to the Shroomie Shenanigans page
Fist link links to Labrotorium page, second one links to Cookies Of Darkness page
Play Now links to Game Modes page
This one has no links, but I've only seen it ONCE
links to Mozzarella's Virtual Mine
This one takes your Fandom Username. "Outskits of town" links to MyCookie Adventure, the phone number leads to Town Square
Deltarune Tomorrow joke
Just an Ovensmash ad
Injured? GOOD
Ancient+ Joke
GoudaPrix
Links to Error Busters page
Links to the Cacao Kingdom page
They turned Yeti's song into a Copypasta
Vamp wants to go up
Despite its looks, it doesn't have a link
The short video is this and Cookify leads to DJ's page
This one links to, in order: Affogato Cookie, Mystic Flour Cookie, Pomegranate Cookie, Young Cookie From The Mountains, Dark Choco Cookie, Licorice Ooze.
Just another snack guy
HECK YEAH links to Black Forest's page
Telling you to watch Ads
Links to the Vanilla Kingdom page
and this one I JUST FOUND (so there could be more I'm missing) links to a random page in the "Location" tag
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🧪.
What would Static do if squished between Malware, Solaris and the lemon Moon, whom they claim to hate despite some ... Contradicting evidence
"honey I'd be loud enough for the whole forest to hear--"
They immediately smack both hands over their mouth, display furiously bright and voice box crackling
"S̵T̸O̶P̸ ̸A̵S̶K̶I̷N̶G̸ ̶A̴B̴O̴U̷T̴ ̵H̷I̶M̶!̸!̶"
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✦. ── Graveyard_Conductors system members key ── .✦
Made; Monday 19, May 2025
Updated; Monday 26, May 2025
Alphabetical Order From Simply Plural
Feel free to ask for sources!
New members will be added near the top when updated
─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───
⌞ New alters [Monday 26 - Tuesday 27, May 2025] ⌝
Aurora -😇 [She/Her]
Bad End Happy -⬛💖 [She/Shadow/Sparkle/Pink/Dark]
Dione Moonbell -🌙🐇 [She/Bun]
First Choco Cookie -🍫👑 [She/Crown/Blade/Silver]
Lenore -👩🏻 [She/They]
Lottie -⬛😇 [Xe/Ae]
Peashooter -🫛 [She/They/Hero]
Sally Sinclair -🖤🐇 [She/They/Bun/Tech]
Ula -🧷 [She/They/Bot]
─── ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ───
⌞ original list made; [Monday 19, May 2025]
updated; Monday 26, May 2025] ⌝
.GIFfany - 🎀 [She/Tech/Love/Pixel/Heart/Pink/It]
00nullvoid00 - 🕳️ [Error/Virus/Destroy/Corrupt/It]
1x1x1x1/Domino - 🟩🎲 [It/He/Xe/Binary/Code/Tech/Byte/Hacker/Hx/Shx/Thxy/Ix/X/Script/Cheat/0/1/Malware/Dice/Glow/Green/🎲/🖥️/💻/⌨️/🖱️/💽/💿/💾]
A.C. Void - 🕳️🌌 [He/Xe/It/They/Space/Dark]
Acéro [Syél-Null] - 🕯️ [It/They/Dark/Xe]
Aerobolt - 🦅 [Flight/It/He]
Affogato Cookie - ☕ [He/She/Toxic/Poison]
Agatha/Lucy - 🖤 [She/Claw/Blood/Dark]
Allister - 🎭 [He/They/Ghost/Shy]
Amethyst - 🟪💎 [She/Gem/Crystal/Purple]
Andrealphus - 🏔️ [He/They/Ice/Frost]
Annaki/Anchor - ⛓️⚓ [Any/All/He/She + Neos]
Apple White - 🍎 [She/They/Fruit/Red]
Aquarius - 🔱 [Thorn/Splash/It]
Arabella/Saccharine/Stocking - 🍰 [She/Sweet/Sugar]
Aria Blazze -🎤 [She/Song/🎶/🟪]
Armada - 💜🗡️ [He/She/They/Bite]
Armarouge - 🥊🔥 [Flare/Blaze/It/Nameself]
Arnesic/False/Satanus/Jerald - 🪓 [It/He/Slash/She]
Azalea/Ivy -💐 [She/Floral/Petal/Bloom]
Azurel - 🚓 [He/Xe]
BdoubleO100 - 🤪 [He/Silly/Goof]
Bianca Abercrombie -💉 [She/They/Medical/Syringe]
Big Jet - 🟦✈️ [He/It/Whrr/Nameself]
Black Forest Cookie - 🍒 [She/Her]
Black Hook -🏴☠️ [He/They/Sail/Ship/⚓/🔱]
Black Sapphire Cookie - 🖤💎 [Any/All]
Blastrain - 🚂 [He/They/Steam/Train]
Briar Beauty/Rose -🌹 [Thorn/She/They/Pink/Party/Dream]
Bumblebee -🚗🟨 [He/Buzz]
Burning Spice Cookie -🌶️ [He/Flame/Blaze/Spark]
Burnt Cheese Cookie -🔥🧀 [They/Them]
Buzzy -🐝🟨 [Bzz/Brr/Beep/He/It]
C.A. Cupid -💘 [She/Heart/Love/Wing/Cute/Pink/Sweet]
Calvin -🤸 [He/Him]
Calyrex -🐇👑 [He/Rule/King/Crown/Nameself]
Camion -⬛🚗 [Speed/Evil/Gear/It]
Candy Apple Cookie - 🍭🍎 [She/Sweet/Crisp/Syrup]
Caramel Arrow Cookie -🧋 [She/They]
Celestia Ludenberg -🎰 [She/Dice/Card/♦️/♠️/♣️/♥️]
Ceris -🖤🐉 [She/End/Blade]
Cerise Hood -🐺 [She/Wolf]
Ceruledge -⚔️🔥 [It/Blaze/Flame/Fire/Spectre/Spook/Ghost/Blade/Sharp/Slash/Nameself]
Ceruledge/Shine -✨⚔️ [Star/It/Blade]
Chandelure -🟪🔥 [Flame/Grave/It/She]
Chaos Steve/Calamity -🌈⬛ [He/It/Vain/Flame/Evil]
Choco Drizzle Cookie -🍫 [She/Her]
Choo-Choo Charles -🕷️🚂 [He/It]
Christine -🚗 [She/It/Kills]
Cielo/Evelyro -🪽 [It/Wind/Blur/He]
Cipher/Fane -⬛⚠️ [Nameself]
Circuit -🔌 [It/Its]
Citron -🍊 [He/Zap/Blast/Spy]
Clawdeen Wolf -🐺🛍️ [She/Howl/Moon]
Clockita -⌚ [She/He/Chime/Fight/Chain]
ClownPierce/Azrael -❌🃏 [He/It/Slash/Kill/Blood/Jester/Stab/Sword/Circus/Smile]
Cocoa/Vanilla - ⬜🍫 [Any/All + Neos]
Colle/Redstone -🦜 [He/It/They]
Colored/Rainbow Steve -🌈💧 [Bright/Radiance/Beam/❤️/🧡/💛/💚/💙/💜/It/He]
Copper-Steam Steve/Chain -🥽 [He/It/They/Gear/Whrr/Bolt]
Corrupt Steve -⬛🟥 [It/They]
Corruption Steve -⬛🔮 [Any/All/Ask]
Crazybolt -🔩 [Flame/Bolt/Speed/It/She/He]
Crunchy Chip Cookie -🤍🍪 [He/It]
Cyberwarp -🌐 [She/Digital/He]
Cyn/Cyanide -🛢️ [She/Her]
Dani Burns -🚁 [She/Her]
Dark Control/Kyllian Jestar -🟥☄️ [He/It/Control/Corrupt/Evil/Ancient/Artifact/Element]
Dark Nebula Steve/Malphus/Sauron -⬛🌌 [It/He/Dark/Star]
Deep Bite/Zentyal -🦈 [He/It/Sea/Chomp/Shark/Fang]
Dexter - 🏗️ [It/Nameself]
Dhelmise -⚓ [It/Anchor/Steel/Sea/Chain/Haunt]
Dialga/Temporal -⏳ [It/Steel/Roar/Time/Diamond]
Diancie -💎 [It/She/Gem/Nameself]
Doc Greene -🔬 [He/Him]
Dreadlord -🦴⚔️ [It/Skull/Nameself]
Drift -⛩️ [It/He/Blade/Sword]
Duchess Swan/Stella -🦢 [They/Dance/Swan/Feather/She]
Dynamo -🩶 [They/She/Silver]
E/Ezinor -🍀 [Nameself]
Edge/Gun -🎭🏴 [It/Song]
Egypt/Cairo -🇪🇬 [It/Its]
Eilian Hyé-Hexiciah Copperchain -⚙️ [He/They]
Elder Faerie Cookie -🧚♂️ [He/Fae/It/Xe/Vin/Hir]
Elinor/Seco -🔥 [He/They/Any/All]
Ellalynn -👗 [She/Her]
Entity 303/Loading -🔳 [They/It/Hack/Glitch/Virus/Error/Tech/.EXE]
Entity, The Beta Corruption -👾🌐 [It/Virus/Code/Erode/Break]
Ephemeral -🕖✂️ [They/Xe/It/She]
Error/Glitch/404 -💾⚠️ [It/Code/Corrupt/.EXE/Virus]
Eternal Sugar Cookie -🍬 [She/Pink/Sweet/Sleep/💤]
Eve -🕸️ [They/Web/Bone]
Faceless -🎩 [Any/All/Mirror pronouns + Neos]
Faybelle Thorne -🧚♀️🌑 [She/Fae/Dark]
Filtch -🟪🐦 [Shine/Flight/It/She]
Financier Cookie -💛 [She/They]
Fix-It -🔧 [Bolt/He/It/Whrr]
Flameout -🏎️🔥 [Speed/He]
Flare/Blaze/Volcan -🔥🍃 [He/It/Fire/Breeze/Ice/Grass]
Flash Vector -⬜🏎️ [He/Zap/Speed/Zoom]
Fleta Z -🏹 [He/Bow/Arrow/Wing/Flight]
Galactic Space -🔆🌌 [It/Nameself]
Galarian Articuno -🔮 [Psychic/Flight/They/It/Nameself]
Galaxy Steve/Andromeda/Alioth/Centarus -🌌 [Ix/It/Xe/Thxy/Hx/Shx/Shi/Hir/Star/Dust/Planet/Sparkle/He/She/They]
Genesis Steve -🌿 [He/They/It/Plant/Ground/Ocean/🌺/🌊/🌵]
Giratina -🕳️🐉 [Death/Void/Dragon/Ghost/Horror/It/Nameself]
Glam -💖 [She/Splash/Envy/Neon]
Glitz -✨ [She/They/Wave/Sparkle]
Glober -🚙🧭 [He/Track]
Golden Cheese Cookie -🧀👑 [She/Rule/Queen/Crown/Nameself]
Goliath -⬛🚛 [It/They]
GoodTimesWithScar -🦙 [He/They/Wild/Hunt]
Graham Burns/Victor -👓 [He/They/Bzz]
Grave -🚛 [It/They/Honk/Motor]
Green Tea Mousse Cookie -🍵[She/They/Nameself]
Grian -🏘️ [He/Crow/CEO]
Haunted Car -🚗🟦 [It/They/Vroom/He/She]
Heatwave -🚒 [He/Flame/Spark/Heat/It]
Heavy Iron -👑🚛 [He/God/Nameself]
Hecate/Veraline - 🔫🧥 [She/Gun/Shoot]
Herobrine -⚠️ [It/He/Danger/Voltage]
Hetzer -🕊️ [Any/All/Nameself/God]
High Boi/Ren -🚬 [He/Him]
High Tide -🚢 [Sea/Wave/Tide/Ocean/Foam/It/They/He]
Holographic -🪩 [It/They/Shine]
Hoopa -⭕ [It/Ring/Nameself]
Horatius/Horus -⏰ [It/Gear/Clock/She]
Hourglass -⌛ [It/Sand/Glow]
Huntress -🩷 [She/It]
Ibuki Mioda -🎸 [She/They/Rock/Scream/🤘]
Illusion Steve/Digital -🌀🟦 [It/They/Glitch/Tech/Virus/Cyber/.Exe/He]
Infinite/Blurr/Velocity -🟥💎 [He/Glitch/Illusion/Warp/They/It]
Infinity Steve -♾️ [Any/They/Electric/Flame/⚡/🔥]
Integrity-Null -👁️ [It/Thing/Virus/ERROR/Code/Hack/.EXE or no pronouns/Nameself]
Ioda -💗⬛ [She/Dark/Moon/Shade/Night]
Isabella 'Ivy' Valentine -🗡️🐍 [She/Blade]
Jade West -✂️ [She/Slash/Goth/✂️]
Junko Enoshima -🧵 [She/Fashion/Rule]
K.A.R.R. -💢🚗 [Any/All]
K.I.T.T./Server - 🕵️ [It/He]
Kaboodle -🐇 [She/They/Bun/Fluff/Bunny/Silly/:3]
Kaia/Rot -⬛💀 [She/They/It]
Kaiaqo-Xetel -💀🎭 [It/Hir/Xe]
Kernel Corn -🌽 [He/It/They]
Kian -🪙 [He/Shine/Gold]
King Naeus -👑 [They/It/King/Crown/Rule/Skull/He]
King Steve -☄️ [It/He/Rule/King/God]
Kitty Cheshire -🐈 [She/Trick/Smile/Purr/Meow/Claw]
Kiver -🦑 [He/They/Rule/Ink/Splat]
Kneesocks -🧦 [She/It/Demon]
Knightala -🩷🛡️ [It/Its]
Kokichi Ouma -🪖 [He/Rule/Lord]
Kouign-Amann Cookie -🍥 [She/They/It/Sword/Swirl]
Kronos/Vryema -⏱️ [He/It/Chime/🔔]
Lillie -🗝️💝 [She/Heart/Love/Time/💕/🕖]
Lizzie Hearts -♥️🃏 [She/Heart/Red/Queen/Rule]
Loona -🐺🌙 [She/It/Howl/Kill/Claw]
Lost Hour -🌀⌚ [He/Fear/They/It/Clock/Time/Memory]
Lunala -🌕 [Moon/Light/Bat/Dark/Shade/It/They/She]
Madeline Hatter/Kathlyn -🫖 [Silly/:3/Funny/Tea/She/They]
Madness Steve -💢 [He/It/Any/All]
Malware Steve/Hard Drive -💻 [It/Its]
Marbleberry Cookie -👮♀️ [She/Cyber/Tech/Bot]
Marshadow -⚫ [It/They/Stealth/Shade]
Martha -🤠😈 [She/They]
Mega Ambler -🚑 [He/It/⚕️]
Megatronus -🟪 [It/Fear/Lord/Rule/He]
Melody Piper -🎧 [They/Song/She]
Melody -🎹 [She/Tune/Note/Song]
Memory Steve/Spiral -🌀👔 [It/They/He]
Mercurial Knight Cookie -🗡️🍪 [Fae/Xe/Hir]
Metal Sonic -🤖🟦 [It/They/Cyber/Bot]
Milky Way Cookie -🌌🚂 [ He/She/They/Dream/Sleep/Star/Space/Train/Rail]
Mind Virus -🦠🟦 [.EXE/Virus/Glitch/Sick/It/They]
Mini Muka -🪙🥕 [He/They/Any/All + Neos]
MinuteTech/Iodine -⬛👔 [He/They/Dark]
Mirage/Mayavin -🩷🟦 [Any/All]
Miss Bloomie -🧪 [She/They]
Miss Circle -✏️ [She/Slash/Guts/Blood/Bite]
Miss Emily -🧭 [They/It/She]
Mogswamp -🐝🍯 [Any/All + Neos]
Monika CinnyRoll -▶️ [She/:3/X3/Silly/Gleep/Glorp]
Morie/Mnemosyne -🌀⬛ [She/Xe/Swirl/Mist]
Motormaster -🟪🚛 [Road/Rage/Fear/It/He]
Musclehyde -🪝 [Any/All]
Mystic Flour Cookie -🌾 [Nameself]
Nama -🩵 [It/?/She]
Nameless One/Anamika -🪦 [ It/They/Grave/Skull/Death/King/Power]
Nefera DeNile -🩹 [She/Mummy/Desert/Gold/Pharaoh/Power]
Negative Steve -➖🟨 [It/Its]
Néon -👾 [Light/Nameself]
Niente/Vacara -⬛🎀 [She/It/Haunt/Ghost/Shade/Shy]
Night Cap -🍄 [She/Shade/Stealth/Fungi/It/They]
Nightmare Steve -💥 [He/Rule/Crown/Flame/Death/King/Fear/It]
Nightstrike -🦇 [Night/Shade/It]
Nihlo -🧸⬛ [He/Shade]
NULL/NULLIFY -⬛⚔️ [It/Its | He/Him only if close]
Nvee/Despair/Haze -😓 [They/She/It/Gloom]
Obsidian Steve Captain -🛡️ [He/Lava/Blaze/Dark/Sharp]
Oesaie/Lavander -⬜🐱 [She/Purr]
Onna -🟪🖤 [She/Her]
Onyx -🪨⬛ [Nameself]
Orchid Mantis -🪷 [She/Scythe/Pink]
Origin Alex -🟧 [She/They/:3]
Orion -🟨⬛ [They/Thing/It]
Paralon -🦂🟪 [He/They/It]
PESTRiCA/Noir -⬛⬜ [They/It/Juggle/Circus/Nameself | She/Her if close]
Phantom/Nyx -🌙 [It/Rot]
Phoenix Fire -🚒🔥 [He/Flare/It/They]
Pielope -🃏 [She/It]
Plague Steve/Biohazard/Toxin -🦠 [He/Virus/Sick/Radio/Active/Hazard]
Positive Steve -➕🟥 [He/Zap/⚡]
Pro Chara -🐙 [He/Ink/Splat/Torp]
Prune Juice Cookie -💜🍪 [Any/All/He/They/She]
Pseudo -❓[It/They]
Pudding Á La Mode Cookie -🍮 [Any/All]
Pure Vanilla Cookie -🍦 [Any/All/Nameself]
Purple Steve/Pumpkin - 🎃 + 🟪/🟣/💜 [They/End/Ender/Crystal/Vwoops]
Queen Bee/Scillia -👑🐝 [She/Sting/Bzz]
Quickshadow -🚗⬜ [She/It/They/Spy/He/Blur]
Quillfire -🦔 [It/He/She/They]
Radiation -☣️ [It/They/Toxic/Hazard]
Raven Queen -🟪⬛ [She/Her]
Raven -🐦⬛ [She/Soul/Demon]
Reaper Nurse -💊 [It/They/She]
Red Blitz -🟥🔥 [She/He/It/Spark]
Revuxor -🧑💻 [He/Lost/God]
Robecca Steam -🌫️ [She/They/It/Gear/Copper/Bolt]
Robo Fizz -🎪🤖 [It/Cyber/He]
RQ! Hypno Steve -👁️🟥 [He/They/It]
Salvage -♻️ [Recycle/It/He/They]
SB737 -🐧🕶️ [He/Emperor/Penguin/Sword/Crown]
Scarlet -❌ [She/It/They/Death/Grim/Reaper/Fear/Sin]
Scorpion Cookie -🦂🍪 [She/Sting/Venom]
Scorponok -🦂 [Sting/It]
Shadow Milk Cookie -🟦🥛 [He/Trick/Smile/Jester/Silly/Gleep/Glorp]
Shadow X/Aeolian -🥷 [Any/All]
Shaymin -🌺 [It/Grass]
Sideswipe -🏎️ [Race/Speed/It/He]
Silent Salt Cookie -🧂[Nameself/It]
Sin -⬛😈 [Any/All/Nameself]
Sky Gallop/Aelou -🏰 [Mirror pronouns]
Slipstream -🤺 [It/He/They]
Smoked Cheese Cookie -💨🧀 [He/She/They]
Soklana -👙 [Xe/She]
Soren -🔳👔 [He/Swirl/Shy/?]
Soul Steve/Apparition/Phantasmal -👻🟦 [It/Spirit/Grave/Death]
Soundwave -🎼 [Sound/Music/Sonic/Stealth/Pulse/Bass/It]
Spectrier -👻🐎 [It/She/Grace/Shy]
Spirit Guardian -💫 [She/They/It/Wing]
Starscream -⭐ [Star/Lord/Death/It/He]
Stella/Sarie/Loial -🔮🪄 [She/Crystal/End]
Sticks -🪃 [She/Grr/They]
Stolas -🦉👑 [He/Him]
Strawberry Crepe Cookie -🍓 [It/Xe/He/Tech]
String Gummy Cookie -🔫 [They/Hir/He]
Strongarm -🚨 [Siren/She/It]
Tarte Tatin Cookie -🏴☠️🍪 [She/Her]
Telvena -🤠 [She/They/Wrath/Ye/Haw]
The Car -🚘⬛ [It/Demon/Evil/He]
The First Curse -⛓️/📔 [It/He/Curse/Chain/Enchant]
The First Void -⬛⛓️ [It/They/Void/Curse/Enchant/Death]
The Judge -⚖️ [They/It/He/Code]
The Watching Nightmare -🧟 [It/Thing/Stalk/Stealth/Claw/Bite/Blood]
The Watching Shade -🟦 [He/It/Nameself/Stalk/Stealth/They]
Thunderhoof -🫎 [Steel/It/He/Ayo]
Time Steve/Thoth -🕰️ [He/Hour/Clock/Second/Bronze/Chain/Gold/Minute]
Timekeeper Cookie -⏱️✂️ [Any/All/Eternal/Nameself + Time/Steampunk neos]
Toralei Stripe -🐯 [She/They/Claw/Swipe]
Tricerashot -🦕 [Shot/It/He/She]
Tyan -🕧 [He/It/Tick/Time]
Uzi/AK/Diesel -💟 [She/It/Blast/Danger/Bite | prefers She/Her overall]
Vassago -🌟 [He/Star/They]
Vazio/Exnihilo/Cassius -🕳️⬛ [It/He/Evil/Void/Empty/Dark]
Velvette/Sewnia -🪡 [She/They/Thread]
Veris -🔲 [Ix/It/They/He/She]
Vexion -🎮 [Slash/Blood/It/They]
Vixoren/Drizzle -🌊 [He/She/It/Element]
Vizor -🕶️ [Any/All + Neos]
Void Steve/Vortex Jr/Nexus/Milenko -⬛🔥 [It/He/Void/Death/They]
Vontra -🤖 [She/It/Bot/Cyber/Tech]
Voyager -🔥🟦 [They/Flame/Ghost]
Wargen/Stax -🗡️ [They/It]
Whyrn -🫐 [He/Nameself]
Whisper -🤫 [It/Shy/Quiet/Cloud]
White Pumpkin -⬜🎃 [They/He/Axe/Nameself]
Wildberry Cookie -🫐🟥 [Xe/Hir]
Wildbreak -🛞 [He/They/Speed]
Windblade -🟥✈️ [Blade/She/Whirl/Jet/Nameself]
Winter Steve/Ice -❄️ [Snow/Ice/Cold/Frost/Freeze/Frozen/❄️/🧊/They/It]
Wrath -💣 [It/Wind/Breeze]
Xelven -🪶 [They/Them]
Xyno -⬛ [It/Its]
YARRwhal -🟨🐙 [He/Oomy/Splat/Range/Blast/Ink/They/It]
Yuki -🌨️ [She/Snow/Frost/Cold]
Yuri -😺 [Purr/Meow/Claw/Bite/Scratch/Claw/Fur/Cat/Paw/She/Hir]
Yveltal -💀🦅 [It/Death/Red]
Zeganirn -⚔️ [It/Its]
Zenithith/Zenthican -🍁 [It/Xe/Hin]
Zephyr/Isa -🧊🌳 [Any/All]
Zip/Inane/Ziro -💾 [Xe/Corrupt/Hir/Vin]
Zizo -🚧 [He/She/>w</:3]
ZombieCleo/Umbrae -🌺🧟♀️ [She/They/Bite/Rot]
Zxenora/Zyena -🥀⬛ [She/Bite/Shade]
∀c3я0/Oréca -⬛🟦 [It/Error/Virus/Corrupt/Xe/Vin]
∑/eiπ/Eian -🧮 [They/It/Maths/Equal/Add/Any/All]
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One of the student analysts that is supposed to be HELPING with tickets has a tendency to get a bit too lost in the weeds researching tickets. My guy just spent like an hour and a half looking into one malware alert. Which is fun and all but during that time, I closed probably over 100 tickets. You are missing the forest for the trees my boy. Please Help.
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