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stephantasmagoria · 3 years ago

Text

Whole Notes

Her whole body pulsed with each phrase. She inhaled crescendos, exhaled decrescendos. Rhythmic integrity was the sole concern of her heartbeat. Her short fingers struck the ebony and ivory keys of Gulbransen, the player piano that never learned how to play itself. It knew Ume Sakamoto as its devoted companion from the moment it planted roots at Sakamoto's Seed Company.

Ume studied piano with Mrs. Johnson. The lessons were a seventh birthday gift from her father, Akira Sakamoto. After the death of his wife and son during childbirth, Akira searched for months to find an affordable teacher. By Ume's eighth birthday in the Spring of 1941, she and Gulbransen played the second movement of Beethoven's Pathetique Sonata for her father and the sacks of seeds that would be dispersed in Central Valley soils.

Ume spent every day after school and all day during the weekends at her father's business. She walked straight to Gulbransen who stood in the far-left corner of the shop. She cherished Saturday morning practice sessions, knowing she had two whole days to play and dream with Gulbransen. It was a Saturday morning in mid-May when she jumped in her seat after placing the last delicate chord of Pathetique, oblivious to the small audience that formed behind her. She turned to see her father standing next to Mr. Hagopian, the Armenian barber who owned a shop next door. A boy she didn't recognize stood a half-inch taller than Mr. Hagopian’s knee.

"That was good! Very, very good!", Mr. Hagopian exclaimed. The girl responded with a wide-eyed stare.

"Ume, say thank you to Mr. Hagopian", her father insisted.

"Thank you, Mr. Hagopian".

"Ume, this is Raffi, my son. He heard you playing from next door and wanted to hear. I heard piano here before, but I thought it was the radio!"

"How did you do that?" Raffi exclaimed, transfixed by the piano.

"Ummm, I don't know", Ume whispered as she looked at the floor.

"She has a teacher", her father beamed. "Teacher says you're very good, Ume!"

"Akira, where did you get the piano?"

"A farmer didn't have enough money to buy seeds last year, so he traded piano for seeds. He said no one ever used it. Now Ume plays every day!".

"I want to play!" Raffi shouted as he tried to wiggle away from his father's hand and approach Gulbransen. His father gripped Raffi’s hand tightly.

"Raffi, that's not our piano. We can't just…".

"Yes, play, play! Ume, show him how to play something", Akira interjected.

Before she could respond, Raffi jumped next to her on the piano bench and hit Gulbransen's keys with his palms. "Raffi, stop!", his father walked over and grabbed his hands. "It's their piano, you can't just hit it! Let Ume show you".

Ume looked into the eager eyes dancing in front of her. "Well, what do you want to play?", she asked.

"What you played! I like that song!"

"Ummm, well, how about I teach you to play the first song I ever learned?"

"Yeah!" Raffi laid his hands flat on the keyboard and wriggled in his seat.

"Akira, I have a customer coming. Can I leave Raffi here until I'm done?"

"Yes, yes! Ok, Manoug! They play in here while we work", Akira smiled. Ume looked at the floor and sighed.

"Thank you, Akira. Raffi, I'll be back soon. Listen to Mr. Sakamoto and Ume, and don't hit the piano!"

"Ok, pop", Raffi replied, keeping his eyes fixed on Ume.

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The summer of 1941 provided few daylight hours when the children of Fresno could play outside without the miserable heat of the sun beating their bodies. By July, the children who could not access swimming pools found ways for their playful spirits to survive. They migrated from house-to-house, playing outdoor games indoors to the dismay of their parents. Others valiantly charged into the sun armed with nothing more than their perseverance to play, periodically retreating into foxholes of shade. Ume and Raffi spent their mid-morning hours sharing a fruit salad made of cherries, Japanese plums, apricots, and figs before playing music with Gulbransen.

Ume progressed on the piano beyond what anyone thought was possible. She was reluctant to teach Raffi at first. He was half her age, and she was worried he wouldn't be a serious student. She did not want him to detract from her practice routine. Over time, she came to appreciate that teaching him helped her own musicianship. She found herself excited for their almost daily lessons where she could impart her knowledge.

"Raffi, you hold that note too long. It only gets two counts".

"But it's a donut! Donuts get four counts!", Raffi argued.

"No, that's when it's in common time, or 4/4 time. This is cut time. See the C with a slash through it?"

"Yeah, but what does that mean?"

"It means that every measure has two beats instead of four, and all of the notes get half of the count. So the donut, or whole note, gets two counts".

"But you said donuts get four counts!"

"That's when it is in a 4/4 time signature. Here, look, let me show you something". She searched through a pile of sheet music and pulled out a piece that showed '12/8' at the beginning of the song. "See, this song has a 12/8 time signature. In this song, a donut, I mean a whole note… we need to start calling them whole notes, Raffi. A whole note gets 8 counts".

"Eight counts?"

"Yeah, but usually you see it written like this", she pointed to a dotted whole note on the page. "See the dot next to it? That means it gets the full 12 counts for the entire measure".

"I don't get it", Raffi pouted and crossed his arms.

"You will, don't worry. Just remember that for this song that we're playing, the whole note only gets two counts because it's in cut time".

"What's a whole note again?"

"A donut", Ume sighed. "But remember, it's called a whole note, not a donut! We need to start calling them whole notes, Raffi! Whole notes mean different things in different times". Raffi scrunched his face at the sheet of music in front of him.

"Don't worry, I didn't get it at first either. You'll get it, I promise. Let's just keep going".

A few weeks later, Raffi ran into another whole note he did not understand.

"What's that thing on top of the whole note?"

"That's called a bird's eye, or a sustenato. It means that you hold the note for longer than the count. You can hold it as long as you want".

"As long as I want? Like for a whole hour?"

"Well, not an hour. That won't work because the sound will stop at some point".

"The sound will stop?"

"Yeah! You won't be able to hear it after a while. Here I'll show you. Close your eyes, and I'll play a chord. Now keep your eyes closed until you can't hear anymore sound from Gulbransen".

Raffi closed his eyes. Ume struck a G Major chord and held it. She smiled when Raffi leaned in to hear the harmony as it grew faint. He clung to the sound until he couldn't hear it anymore. His eyes popped open and he saw Ume's hands still held G, B, and D on Gulbransen.

"You're still holding it! Why isn't it making sound anymore? Did Gulbransen break?"

"No, Gulbransen isn’t broken!” Ume laughed. “I'm not sure where the sound went, but I like to pretend it's part of the air now. So the sounds we make and the music we play is always around us, even if we can't hear it anymore".

"Maybe it went to heaven?"

"Maybe”, Ume smiled and looked at the picture of her mother hanging above Gulbransen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The early December fog obscured Sakamoto's Seed Company. When Manoug parked his Chevy in front of the shop after church, Raffi sighed in relief when he made out the front door through the tulee fog. "I thought their store went away!", he said to his father. Manoug laughed as they got out of the car and walked into their friends' shop.

Raffi started toward Gulbransen, but he saw that Ume was not sitting with the beloved instrument. He turned to see Manoug walking toward Akira and Ume as they huddled around the radio.

"Akira, what is…"

Akira held up his hand.

"Pearl Harbor Attack by Japanese"

Akira, Ume, and Manoug stared silently at the radio. Raffi stared at them. "Pop, pop, what's wrong?", he pulled at the sleeve of Manoug's church jacket.

"Raffi, we should go".

"Why? Ume and I are supposed to play with Gulbransen today!"

"Raffi, we need to go", Manoug commanded. "Akira, I… well, I will talk to you tomorrow.” Akira nodded slowly, his gaze downcast toward the floor.

"Bye Ume", Raffi said. Ume looked at Raffi and waved goodbye. He noticed her eyes were moist and her whole body trembled.

Manoug and Raffi walked out of the shop and back to the car. "Pop, why were they so sad? "

"Something happened today that made them sad.", Manoug explained.

"Why did Ume look so scared?"

"Well… never mind right now, Raffi. We're ok. Let's go back home and see how your mom is doing".

When Ume saw Mrs. Johnson's car in the driveway on December 9th, she nearly jumped out of her father's moving car and sprinted to the door. The past two days were difficult at school, and she longed for her weekly piano lesson. She tapped the wrought iron knocker at four o'clock sharp, the exact time of her lesson. After seven minutes of knocking and calling out Mrs. Johnson's name, Akira reached for his daughter's hand. She looked at his hand and grabbed it with her own. Silent tears watered Mrs. Johnson's flower beds as Ume and Akira walked back to the car. Akira tried calling Mrs. Johnson the next day, but she hung up the phone as soon as she heard Akira's voice. When Ume went to school, she hoped that the other kids, and even some teachers, would simply ignore her. It was the best treatment she could imagine at that time, even from people who were her friends when they were in school together on December 5th. After-school and weekend practice sessions with Raffi and Gulbransen became sacred. She sought refuge in the world of sound they created together.

After Manoug picked up Raffi from Kindergarten one February afternoon, they walked into Sakamoto Seed Company for the daily musical ritual. Akira pulled Manoug to the opposite corner of the store as the children met at the piano.

"Manoug, buy Gulbransen from me", Akira whispered.

"I can't afford a piano, Akira!".

"We need to get rid of everything! I can't keep it!", Akira shouted. He looked at Ume and Raffi who stopped playing Gulbransen. They turned and stared at their fathers. Manoug looked at them and let out a heavy sigh. He leaned in and whispered to Akira.

"Akira, I can't do it. I don't have enough money to buy a piano".

"Give me anything! We can't take Gulbransen with us".

"You're going somewhere? Where?", Raffi whispered to Ume.

"I don't know. My dad just told me we need to sell everything we can and we're going to the fairgrounds tomorrow".

"You're going to the fair? That sounds fun!"

"No, we're not going to the fair, Raffi. Just the fairgrounds. They're going to take us somewhere".

"Who?"

"I don't know", Ume whispered.

"Well, where are they taking you?"

"I don't know", Ume choked.

"Raffi, let's go", Manoug shouted from across the store as he handed Akira a five-dollar bill.

"I want to stay here with Ume!" Raffi cried.

"Raffi, stop crying! Let's go. We'll be back, we're just going to get Uncle Mesrop's truck".

Raffi hugged Ume, and she returned his embrace as they sobbed together. Manoug opened his mouth to yell again when he saw the two children hugging and crying. He walked over to the piano bench, put his hand on Raffi's shoulder and whispered, "Come on, Raffi. We'll be right back".

Raffi squeezed Ume tighter for a few seconds. Ume released the hug and sniffled. "It's ok, Raffi. I'll see you in a little while, ok?", she smiled.

"Ok", Raffi said as he released his grip on Ume. He wiped his eyes with his hands and stood from the piano bench. Manoug and Raffi walked past the sacks of seeds that carried the sounds of Sakamoto's Seed Company.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Five days after Gulbransen transplanted to its new home, five days after the Sakamoto's disappeared and never returned, Manoug sat with Raffi and his wife Nevart in their living room.

"I am going to City Hall tomorrow and we're changing our names. No more Hagopian, we are Smith. I'm Michael Smith, you're Ronald Smith, and you're Rose Smith". He pointed to his wife and son as he bestowed their new names upon them.

"Why, pop?", Raffi asked.

Manoug jumped from his seat as his whole body shook, "Never mind why! I'm your father, that's why!", he shouted.

Raffi and Nevart stared at him wide-eyed. After several minutes, Nevart took a deep breath, stood up and walked toward her husband. "You can change our names at City Hall, and I will use those names outside of this house. But in this house I am Nevart Hagopian, this is our son Raffi Hagopian, and you are Manoug Hagopian. If you want me to make Armenian food in this house, we use Armenian names in this house". Manoug's body shook more vigorously as he lifted his hand toward Nevart's face. She fixed her gaze into his eyes without flinching. He slowly lowered his hand to his side and nodded his head up and down, his body still shaking.

"Raffi, it is time for bed. I'll make you some warm milk. Go change into your pajamas", Nevart said as she walked toward the kitchen. Raffi watched his father stare at the ground, his whole body convulsing in violent tremors.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Raffi sat on the piano bench behind Gulbransen. He successfully picked out the melody of "Lucky Old Sun" that morning, and now attempted to find the best chords to put the entire piece together. He stopped playing from time to time, closed his eyes and hummed the tune to himself. He heard it on the radio at Manoug's barbershop a few days earlier when he was cleaning the shop after school for his weekly quarter. He grimaced as he swept the floors when Louis Armstrong's version of the song started playing on the barbershop radio. "I hate this song", he thought to himself. Then he saw his father stop as he cut a customer's hair. Manoug looked at the radio for several seconds and sighed as his shoulders relaxed. "Hey Mike, you still there? Is my hair ok?", the customer shouted with his head tilted downward. Manoug didn't reply. His head remained pointed in the direction of the radio to his right, his eyes closed and the scissors poised just beneath the man's neck. "Mike! Mike! Hey, what's going on back there?", the man shouted as he lifted his head. Raffi walked up to his father and placed a hand on his shoulder, "Hayr", Raffi said, beckoning to his father in Armenian. Manoug shook as if startled and promptly replied, "Oh, yes, everything is fine, Mr. Travis. Your hair is fine. Please put your head down so I can finish". Raffi continued sweeping the floor. He moved closer to the radio as he hummed the tune and immersed himself in the chords.

As he picked out the tune with Gulbransen, Raffi sang the only lyrics he remembered. "Show me that river, take me across, and wash all my troubles away, like that lucky old sun, give me nothing to do but roll around heaven all day". He was accompanied by the sounds of his mother bustling in the kitchen as she put the finishing touches on her infamous dolmas. "Manoug, wake up! Wake up! The festival starts in an hour! I'll make coffee, get ready!", Nevart shouted in Armenian from the kitchen. There was no response from the bedroom.

"That lucky old sun, got nothing to do but roll around heaven all day".

"Manoug! Please, Father Kazarian asked me to make these dolmas for the Blessing of the Grapes today, and we need to be on time!".

The bedroom door opened and Manoug shuffled into the living room with his eyes cast toward the floor. Raffi stopped playing and turned to him "Good morning, pop!".

Manoug did not respond or look at his son. He resumed his shuffle past the small dining room table and into the kitchen.

Raffi resumed his work picking out the chords to "Lucky Old Sun".

"Show me that river…"

"Manoug, why are you going outside? You need to fix your hair and get dressed!"

"I need to check on something in the shed". Nevart heard the kitchen leading to the backdoor close. She sighed and continued cooking.

"I got it!", Raffi exclaimed from his seat behind Gulbransen. He played the whole song from start to finish, chords and all. He didn't know the lyrics yet, but it was good enough to play the tune for his father. He jumped from the piano and ran to the kitchen.

"Is pop still outside?", he asked his mother.

"Yes," she grumbled behind the stove. "Tell him to get ready! I don’t want to be late!"

Raffi went through the kitchen door leading to the backyard. "Pop, pop!", he shouted as he walked to the shed with its door ajar. He pushed it open and said, "Pop, come inside I want to play something…. Pop, what are you doing?".

Manoug stood on top of a wooden stool, staring at his son with wide eyes. He held a rope in his hand that he tied to the rafter beam of the shed. The stool wobbled beneath his shaking body. He said nothing in response to Raffi.

Raffi swallowed and slowly walked toward his father. "Hey, pop, I want to play a song for you". He held his hand toward his father as he approached the chair. "Come on, let's go inside. I'll play the song for you, and then we can go to the festival", Raffi said as he forced a nervous smile.

Manoug looked at Raffi's hand as he extended his own shaking hand toward it. Raffi helped his father dismount from the chair, guiding him the yard and back into the kitchen.

"Manoug! Here's some coffee, now go get…" Nevart extended a mug toward Manoug, and retracted it upon seeing his shaking body mostly supported by their twelve-year-old son.

"We're going to the living room,", Raffi told his mother. She followed behind them with the coffee. Raffi brought his father to the couch. Manoug fell into the cushions as if he had been standing with alert attention for the entirety of his 45 years of life and finally had the opportunity to rest. Nevart put the mug on the coffee table and sat next to her husband on the couch. Raffi sat at the piano bench in front of the coffee table, and without a word, he started playing his rendition of "Lucky Old Sun". He sang only the lyrics he remembered, "Show me that river, take me across, and wash all my troubles away, while that lucky old sun, got nothing to do, but roll around heaven all day".

As Raffi played, Nevart held Manoug's shaking hand in her own steady hand. Manoug turned his head toward her. They both smiled. Although they had aged, they recognized the same smiling gaze they shared when they were children in Elizig, Turkey. It was the same smiling gaze they shared when Raffi was born. By the last few measures of "Lucky Old Sun", Manoug stopped shaking. His pulse steadied and synchronized with Nevart's.

Raffi played the final chord and sustained the whole note. He held it until the vibrations of the final harmony unified with the summer ether.

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