#mare of easttown spoilers

[xmcu-fietro]

Some Thoughts on Ralph + His Deleted Scene

Warning ahead for Wandavision and Mare of Easttown spoilers, as well as rumors about the Agatha spin-off!

Here's my initial thoughts on the scene! I kept pushing off posting this since I was worried I'd forget stuff that I'd want to mention, but I think at this point I just need to post it, and I can always repost/add stuff later xD

First Thoughts

Not to sound hyperbolic, but the costume/hair and makeup departments choosing to put Ralph (a very non-serious stoner surfer bro) in a button-up and for him to have the "police detective Colin Zabel" haircut is fascinating to me. This is the last thing I would expect him to look like outside of the hex--I'd been assuming that Ralph's haircut looked like Evan's in the behind the scenes Wandavision interview, or at least a little longer like his headshot. I guess they chose to just not give him a wig when they filmed, and that was right after shooting Mare of Easttown (but why? what was the reasoning behind that choice? because presumably they put some thought into it if they put so much thought into the hair/costuming for the rest of the show). Instead they gave him a much more formal, rule-follower type of haircut, not something more messy and laidback like he'd had in the show as Pietro/Ralph.

I also think it's really interesting that they made him wear a tucked in button-up shirt, because that feels weird for Ralph too. The hoodie/button-up combo is interesting because--at least as far as I know--that's an unusual combination (casual and formal, laid-back and serious, hex-Ralph and post-Hex-Ralph, who is rumored to be pretty affected by the Hex).

(also, sidenote: Ralph's outfit gets me because I had a strong Dear Evan Hansen phase in highschool and it looks like someone combined Connor and Evan's fashion choices in this photo xD)

The Agatha Spin-Off

Anyways, back to Mare of Easttown. I think there's some possibility that they kept this hairstyle as an intentional nod to Colin because we already know that the Agatha spin-off is partially inspired by Mare of Easttown. (and who is Mare's kind-of-but-it's-complicated sidekick and love interest? Colin. And who is Agatha's kind-of-but-it's-complicated sidekick and (fake) love interest? Ralph. Checkmate, he has to be in the spin-off to make the reference complete! /half-joking). but he'd better not die this time or else

Is “Ralph” important?

From a character standpoint, regardless of whether "Ralph" ends up being Peter or being in the spin-off at all, I find it interesting that Ralph is a meta character referencing nine other characters: Ralph Kramden (The Honeymooners), Darrin Stephens (Bewitched), Nick Moore (Family Ties), Richard Stabone (Growing Pains), Uncle Jesse (Full House), Joey* (Friends), Pietro Maximoff (Age of Ultron), Peter Maximoff (X-Men movies), and now, with the Agatha rumors and the haircut, seemingly Colin Zabel (Mare of Easttown)—the latter two also being played by Evan Peters, which is extra meta.

All of this to say—there's a weird amount of meta referencing going on here, and you don't give a weird amount of meta references to a character who you’re not supposed to pay much attention to. If he was purely meant as a throwaway gag/joke character, trying to layer so many references would be putting a hat on a hat—trying to do too many things with one joke, overwhelming it and, in this case, causing Ralph to seem confusing and unnecessary rather than funny.

While I can't prove that him being important means he'll end up being Peter or that he'll end up in the Agatha spin-off, I definitely think that him referencing so many characters, being the missing person in the case that led to SWORD going to Westview, and all of the other weird things about him (the 60's flashback from Halloween, the P8M license plate, his hair in episode 5) has to mean something--even if the more Peter-ish clues do end up being more of a red herring than hints of truth (although I still think he's Peter, so I'm not giving up on that yet).

And for what it's worth, I think if Marvel was trying to introduce a new, relevant to the story but totally-not-Quicksilver character, they wouldn't have practically had a big "THIS IS QUICKSILVER" sign above him until the finale. Because ultimately that would hurt a completely separate character, since that new character would just live in Peter's/Pietro's shadows instead of getting to be their own character--I mean, we know Ralph is important, but we don't even know his real name, since Ralph was his hex name. So if he is important--and he certainly seems to be--I think he'd have to be Peter.

-------------------

*note: Ralph may also be referencing Chandler, which makes for 10 references instead of 9.

[doll3tt33]

Idk if anyone here has watched black mirror before, but there’s this one episode ‘hang the DJ’, which is basically about some AI dating program that pairs you up but puts an expiration date on each relationship.

I’m not gonna spoil anything but I HIGHLY recommend it cuz it’s SO DAMN ROMANTIC(( THE ENDING ITS THE ENDING 😭😭 I wanna make a bot based on it, but the practically nonexistent memory capacity of the bot will ruin the story, and now I’m thinking of writing a fic instead but idk how ughhhjsjsm

[farttherapy]

Hang on…

Video: Nora Poggi at the now infamous and loathed toga party housewarming at Villa SF in 2012

Fun fact: the pictured scene in The French Dispatch would be inspired by a SFW B&W photoshoot session the our side of things artist and her then non artist boyfriend had, he snapped her photo instead and she was the muse.

[quickandsilvers]

MASTERLIST

➩ Requests are OPEN!

➩ Smut is marked by 🔥

_______________________________________________

XMEN

Peter Maximoff

Silver Hair Dye 🔥 - Reader dresses up as Peter for the Xmen annual halloween party. Smut ensues.

Sick Day 🔥 - Reader is sick and Peter takes really good care of you. (He also finds something he most definitely shouldn’t have)

Wet Dream 🔥 - Reader has quite the raunchy dream one night. Spoiler alert; Peter is there for the show 👀

Medical Malpractice and Awkward Interactions 🔥 - Many times Peter Maximoff embarrasses himself in front of you, and one time you patch him up… and screw him against a shower wall. It’s standard first-aid procedure, right?

The Spy Who Loved Me - Getting stuck in an elevator with a world-renowned Xman wasn't on your 1984 bingo card. Guess you'll just have to watch the hours tick by on Peter Maximoff's 'aces as fuck' scooby doo watch. Ruh roh!

_______________________________________________

MARE OF EASTTOWN

Colin zabel

Unresolved Tension - Reader and Colin fight over a particularly hard case. Very Angsty but fluff at the end 💕

_______________________________________________

HEADCANNONS

Peter Maximoff Sleeping- Slight NSFW!🔥

Peter Maximoff and Nail polish

Peter Maximoff’s Mixtape 🔥

[my-own-walker]

Hi, I'm sorry to bother you but I wanted to ask you if you could write a fic or a long one-shot about Colin Zabel (I don't know if you saw Mare of Eastown).

The story line would be this: Colin asks YN out because Mare rejected him (basically the scene happened where he thought they were on a date and she just wanted to talk about the case).

YN agrees to go on the date. They start going out several times. At one point she finds out that Colin asked her out on a date out of spite (bc of the Mare thing). So she confronts him and tells him that she liked him, she gets angry because she feels he played with her feelings. And then Colin tries to fix the situation because, during the several dates, he realizes that he started to like YN.

And, if enough, make like an epilogue where they are a happy family (Colin and YN).

Too long. Sorry.

On The Other Line - Part 1

sure can! (it’s never too long, anon. much love)

warnings: spoiler alerts possible ahead for mare of easttown, mentions of violence against women, mentions of death, light sm*t/some steamy moments, some misogyny (it's really true to the area so i include it lightly)

author's note: i just so happen to know the delco area VERY well so expect me to nerd out on this one. accents, slang, food, everything will be very accurate. mare of easttown was pretty true to delco, but i can make it better. evan fucking nailed the accent, as he always does, btw.

+++

Being from Easttown meant that seeing someone new in town was a headline-worthy event.

So when Detective Colin Zabel showed up to help out with the Erin McMenamin case, everyone and their mom-moms were talking about it. Gossiping about the case and just how bad it was, considering the fact that they called in backup.

I'll admit it, I engaged in the gossip. My Uncle Nick owned the bar in town and would tell me all about what he heard about the case. He's worse than a chick, I'll tell you that.

Now I had no personal connection to the case. I knew of Erin but not enough to really be torn up about the whole thing. It was scary, yeah, being a woman in town after one was missing and another was dead, but I couldn't be bothered with tears. I didn't want to face the fact that things were getting scary.

I worked as a librarian. Something about reading called to me. It was great to escape from the disgusting world I found myself living in. One where women were being brutalized just minutes from my home. I have always been a sucker for escapism.

My Uncle Nick's bar became a landing place for me most nights. I was afraid to go back to my apartment alone. I didn't have a car so I'd have to walk. The bar was only half a mile from the library, and my apartment was 2 miles away. The bar was the better choice considering everything going on.

I'd help out serving sometimes. Other times I'd just sit behind the bar and talk to the patrons. Then my uncle would drive me home in his truck. I didn't mind helping out if it meant that I was safe.

+

It was a Thursday night. Around 10 pm. I was doing my usual routine of sitting behind the bar after work, talking to the familiar faces that always came by. At this bar, there were only regulars.

That was until I saw Colin Zabel walk through the front door.

It was like seeing a celebrity. I silently wondered if he was here to question somebody about the case. I picked up my book and began to read it, trying to send an innocent bystander vibe.

He walked over to the bar and slumped himself down on the seat nearest to me.

'Fuck.' I thought.

My Uncle Nick walked over to Colin and set down a coaster in front of him.

'Just a PBR, please?' Colin said as he looked up.

'Draft or can?' my uncle replied.

'Can, please,' Colin answered, rubbing his temple with his hand.

'PBR?' I scoffed from my seat. 'Colin Zabel. Could you fulfill the Delco trash stereotype more, please?'

'Wh-what?' he stuttered while smiling, looking up in awe at my directness.

'You couldn't pick a trashier beer,' I continued putting down my book on the bar next to him. 'Plus, if you're gonna get it, get the draft dude. It at least looks classier.' I leaned forward on the stool I was sitting on, resting my elbows on the bar in front of me and placing my chin in my hands.

'Yo, I've had a rough night, cut me some slack,' he laughed.

'Rough night or not, I'd never go into a bar for the first time and order a PBR. Complete jerkoff move, Zabel.'

'Okay, youse around here know my name and it's gettin' weird. And how do you know this is my first time in here,' he chuckled.

'Oh sorry I'm bein' rude. I'm Y/N. Y/N Y/L/N. You are kinda famous around here, detective. And my uncle owns this place. I'd know if you'd been in here before,' I smirked.

As if on cue, Uncle Nick returned, reaching around me to place the can in front of Colin.

'Makin' friends, hun?' my uncle asked, patting my right shoulder.

'Only always,' I replied, smiling up at him. He walked away, shaking his head at me.

'Well, Y/N, you're very forward, huh?' he suggested as he sipped his drink.

I guess I was. The bar was sort of my domain. I talked to every patron like that. After all, everyone that was in there was either my teacher, classmate, doctor, or employer at one time. I knew everyone so I acted like it. And I knew of Colin so I felt like I could talk to him like that. Totally forgot he was a complete stranger.

'But you liked it, though,' I quipped back. He simply laughed and shook his head, casting his eyes down.

'What brings you here, anyways?' I asked.

'Closest bar to the restaurant I was just at,' he shrugged.

'Didn't get enough to drink there?' I challenged. He looked up and met my eyes. His were a deep brown. He looked sad.

'Oh, it was a trainwreck,' he sipped his drink again.

'Don't care to elaborate, hm?' I asked. He just shook his head.

'Y'know, Y/N? I'm feeling really bold right now,' Colin started, making eye contact with me again. 'Would you wanna go out sometime? Y'know what? Maybe tomorrow. Lunchtime?'

I was taken aback. 'You're pretty forward yourself, Zabel.'

'You're pretty and I feel like it would just be fun,' he continued.

'Oh, I'm just pretty?' I replied, feigning shock.

'Oh shut up,' he laughed as he pushed my forearm lightly.

+

After exchanging numbers and chatting some more he left. Over text, we agreed to meet in the park at lunchtime to talk. He'd provide the coffee, he promised.

The next day I walked to work with more pep in my step than usual. I was even singing a little when putting books back on shelves. It had been a while since I'd been on a date. He was really cute so I couldn't help but be excited.

I got to the park earlier than we'd agreed upon, but that motherfucker still beat me there. He was holding two cups of coffee and was dressed smartly in a long tweed grey coat.

'You're eager, Zabel!' I called across the park as I walked upon him.

'You're early, too, miss,' he replied, raising an eyebrow and pulling me in for a hug. When we separated he handed me one of the cups. 'Oat milk for you, my dear.'

I smiled. He remembered a passing comment I made the night before.

We started to walk, talking about everything under the sun. I tried not to ask too much about his work, with the case being so sensitive, and all. We came up on a playground. There was a blonde woman sitting on a bench nearby, obviously watching a young child.

Colin suddenly grabbed my hand and pulled me closer. The gesture gave me butterflies in my stomach. Walking closer to the bench, the blonde woman looked up and waved. Colin waved back and flashed his best closed-lip smile.

"Colin, hey,' the woman said. "About la-'

'Mare, this is Y/N,' Colin drew nearer to me and kissed my cheek. I blushed heavily.

'H-hi," I started.

'Y/N, this is Mare. She used to be on the Erin McMenamin case with me,' he snipped, gesturing his hand toward her. She rolled her eyes and went back to watching the child on the playground.

'I don't have time for this today, Colin,' Mare said, dismissing us.

We walked away just a far enough distance out of her earshot before I said, 'she's a fuckin' ray of sunshine.'

'Quite a woman,' Colin replied, looking back at her, still not letting go of my hand.

+

The rest of the date went super well. So well, in fact, that I didn't stop bothering him. I texted him every day, every second I could get the chance.

He returned the energy…somewhat. He was a busy man, being on the police force after all. I didn't think too much of it.

We planned to go back out again on that Sunday for lunch.

+

'Hey, pretty,' he breathed as he took his jacket off. I beat him to the restaurant. I won, this time. He sat down in the seat across from me.

He called me pretty. My face felt hot. He seemed to really be into me. And I felt the same.

The meal was great. We continued to get to know each other and I really started catching feelings for him. I invited him back to my apartment after and he said yes.

The inside of my apartment was, I'll say it, pretty strangely decorated. I'm a lover of all things fun and odd, and my interior design choices reflected it. For example, my couch was royal purple, and I had billiard balls in a decorative bowl on my cowboy-themed coffee table. I refused to use overhead lighting so everything was lit a warm yellow and striking blue, thanks to the lights I bought off Amazon.

The best part, and my shining accomplishment, my bed was heart-shaped. So me and so weird. I think it came from a strip club. I found the frame and mattress discarded on the side of the road. Score.

I could tell Colin was shocked by the way he was looking around. He shrugged his coat off and placed it on one of the clown hooks by the door.

'I know it's weird bu-' I started.

'No, Y/N, this place is really...stellar. It has personality, for sure,' he assured me. He continued to wander around, looking at my things.

I started to feel kind of shy in my own home. Like this man was fully in my apartment and I had the fattest crush on him. If there was one thing about me, though, I wasn’t shy. I decided that the best and only way to power through it was to kiss him, so I did.

He tensed at first, not expecting the contact, but soon relaxed into it, placing his hands on my waist and pulling me into him.

I pulled away. ‘Sorry, I just- like-‘

‘No it’s okay, I liked it,’ he grinned. ‘You’re fucking cool, Y/L/N.’

‘I mean I don’t fight crime for a living but-‘ I started but was promptly cut off by Colin’s lips on mine again. Sweet kisses turned more passionate as I started to lead him to my bedroom.

I fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. He pulled my cardigan down off my shoulders. When we reached the bedroom I tugged his shirt off and threw it behind him, demonstratively. He grabbed the bottom hem of my camisole and pulled it over my head, exposing my black lace bra.

It was then that he noticed my bed.

‘No, you’re fuckin’ joking,’ he laughed, walking towards it and hopping up on it. ‘Are we about to fuck like 70s porn stars right now? A heart-shaped bed?’ His smirk was so cute.

I didn’t reply. Instead I attacked him with kisses, crawling into his lap. I felt his hard-on in his pants below me. I straddled his thighs and pushed him down gently into a laying position.

‘Y/N….fuck,’ he moaned as I peppered kisses down his chest and stomach, stopping at the waistband of his pants. I slowly unbuttoned them, making him wait for it. He helped me tug them off of his legs. I placed my hand on his cock through his underwear and waited as if to ask permission. ‘Please,’ he mustered.

I reached in and pulled it out, immediately taking him in my mouth. He muttered every curse word under the sun as I continued to blow him.

+

We spent the rest of the day in my bed. Our time was used talking, then having sex, then talking again. Repeating the cycle until I was thoroughly convinced that I was in love with him.

He left me around 10 that night and for some reason, I felt empty. Cold. It was an odd feeling considering the ecstasy I has experienced all day. I put it down to being tired.

But I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.

+++

Okayyyyy yay!!! That was part 1 of two in this lil series. Thanks anon again for the request. Sorry if it felt rushed in some points. I was trying not to make this thing like 400 parts. I get wordy at times. Part 2 hopefully will be here tomorrow!!

[hatelangdon]

ugh maybe a fic where colin is rushed to the hospital but then actually survives instead of, well... you know... plzz 😭😭

Mare of Easttown spoilers***

HELP, it's not funny but it is. That scene shocked me so bad, I JUMPED OFF MY BED 😭😭 I WAS NOT EXPECTING HIM TO D!E

but yeah this is definitely my newest priority because I need my baby to get his lick back and also I just wanna take care of him, call him a hero, and leave gentle kisses on his forehead.

[spill-to-t]

!SPOILER ALERT FOR MARE OF EASTTOWN!

I swear I’m crying. First Colin is so excited for the date with Mare, than she just uses him for the case. He’s sad. He kisses her, life’s feeling better. AND THAN HE GET’S SHOT?!?!?😭😭😭

I swear my little heart can’t take all of this. Fr I was like crying from the in and outside 🥺

[elaine-in-the-membrane]

I never expected my last Mare of Easttown post to get over 100 notes lol 😭. So here are moments that make me cry no matter how many times I watch. (Warnings: major spoilers, mentions of death)

Mare crying into Helen's arms about Zabel's death for the first time

Siobhan yelling at Mare for having to find her brother's body all those years ago ("It should've been you!")

Helen crying as she apologizes for how she treated Mare as a child and then begging Mare to forgive herself for her son's death

Lori yelling at Mare after Ryan is arrested ("It's Ryan! My Ryan! My Ryan!")

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

I watched Mare of Easttown, and I it broke my heart. And maybe not for the obvious reason.

Spoilers and rant under the cut:

A girl is murdered. Stripped naked and left in a creek in the woods. The undercurrent of her murder runs through the entire series, as Mare slowly unravels the details behind the murder, which culminates in multiple false confessions, discovery of incest, and the ultimate realization that the culprit is her young cousin.

He'd only meant to scare her, it was an accident, they say. His mother claims, heartbroken, that he doesn't even know how to hold a gun.

Well, he knew enough to not only hold the gun, but release the safety and pull the trigger. Twice.

The efforts, the lengths his family (and the victim's family, as they are cousins) went to to protect this boy broke my heart.

Because at no point, in the entire series, did anyone--not even Mare-- stop and say "her life is worth more than her killer's freedom", or "her life is worth more than your family's good name."

The girl's name was Erin, and she was done dirty the entire series. Her uncle was a pedophile and rapist who impregnated her, and then dumped her body in the woods to protect his son from the justice system. He claimed they had a special relationship, and that Erin had wanted it. At every turn it was "when did you start a sexual relationship"-- no. Call it what it is-- it's rape and incest.

Her rapist let Erin's boyfriend believe he was the father, and let Erin-- a high school student-- raise the baby on her own. When it came out that the baby was the result of incest, her rapist tries to pin it all on his brother, another grown man. He only claims responsibility when a picture of him and Erin in bed together surfaces. Still covers for his son the murderer.

All this trouble for the protection of a boy murderer, and zero respect for Erin, his female victim. His freedom and innocence was put above all else-- but what of Erin's innocence? Why did no one try to preserve her childhood?

And worst of all, it rings inherently true-- the way our girls and women are treated as disposable these days, the way their rights and freedoms are being limited more and more, and their bodies more and more subjected to the will and control of men.... a story like Erin's is all too believeable.

It just breaks my heart.

[tea-with-evan-and-me]

just watched Mare of Easttown, (spoiler).

.

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What do you mean zable is dead? Wtf? 😭😭😭😭

i personally refuse to acknowledge his final scene. colin zabel is alive in my heart.

[xmcu-fietro]

well, I’m about a year late but I finally started Mare of Easttown (so just a heads up, I will be posting spoilers--although maybe enough time has passed since the show came out that I don’t need to warn for that? idk)

I just finished the first episode and I’m really interested to see where this goes! Mare seems like a really interesting character (with a lot of walls built up) and I’m curious to know more about her backstory. Also very excited for Colin to show up :)

[wiha-jun]

EVAN PETERS as DETECTIVE COLIN ZABEL

MARE OF EASTTOWN Illusions

[teafrompari]

Colin Zabel wallpapers

• requested by anon

• requests are open

• like/reblog if you save ❤️

[post-modern-prometheus]

i for one support evan peters and his conquest to marry a milf. i mean he did end up dead, mind controlled, then dead again, but you gotta hand it to the man, he’s trying his best.

[ladyfogg]

Love Exists Series

Because I just can’t help myself, I’m turning We Can Explain into a Colin Zabel/Female Reader series called Love Exists, based on the AMAZING song Love Exists by Amy Lee (seriously, go listen to it. It’s one of my favs). 

Give the series playlist a listen.

The series WILL NOT follow the show (for obvious reasons and I'm a sucker for HEA). I’ll try to make each part its own standalone story but they will be written as a series. 

10.3.2022 Update: Please note I am no longer in the EP fandom or writing for his characters. I have no plans to continue this series at this time. 

We Can Explain (M) - After days of making heart eyes at each other, you and Colin finally get hot and heavy in his hotel room until duty comes knocking…and by duty, you mean Mare.

Another Round (M) - You and Colin have been avoiding each other ever since the two of you were interrupted the other night. However, when Mare calls you to come to the bar to pick up Colin, you’re left with no choice but to deal with a very drunk Detective Zabel.

The Morning After (18+) - Colin wakes up in your apartment the morning after getting drunk and the two of you finally finish what you started in his hotel room.

Subtlety (18+) - Colin finds it difficult to get back to work after the weekend you two had together.

First Date (M) - The time has come for you and Colin to finally have your first official date.

Let Me Comfort You (18+) - After leaving your first date to chase a lead, Colin loses the chance to question their informant. Frustrated and feeling useless, Colin returns to your place hoping for some comfort. And you’re more than happy to provide it.

Numbers (18+) - You try to get Colin to open up about what’s bothering him to no avail. After days of tension, the two of you are asked to go undercover at the bar where you’re determined to show Colin you want him no matter what.

Lover (18+) - After your little stunt at the club, Colin is fired up and ready to take you wherever and however he wants.

The Old Fashioned Way (18+) - Colin has to spend the night away and is missing you like crazy. So when you call him before bed, the two of you decide to have a little fun over the phone.

Fractions (M) - You’re trying to process what Colin blurted out over the phone and it makes things more than a little awkward.

[quicksilverownsmysoul]

A Few Too Many

MARE OF EASTTOWN SPOILERS

This is based off the 3rd episode of Mare of Easttown, it’s based off the scene where he’s with Mare but I changed it up a bit! The reader and Colin are friends and he ends up confiding in her after a few too many drinks! I hope y’all like it! My poor baby my heart broke for him while watching it and rewriting it 😭 I wrote this immediately after watching this weeks episode so it may be a little messy

Warning: Angst, little fluff at the end

Heyyyyyy pretty lady.” Colin slurred, sliding over to you, nearly missing the bar stool as he stumbled to sit down.

You let out a little snort, drunk Colin seemed to be a lot more confident than sober Colin. “Hey pretty boy, what are you doing here?” He gave you a lopsided smile at your indirect compliment.

“Nothing.” He laughed out. “Just having some drinks.” He lifted his hand up, “Hey bar guy!” The bartender shot him a dirty looked and walked over to you two. You hid your laughter behind your hand as you watched Colin apologize to the guy. “Sorry I uh won’t do that again. Uhhhh can I get a couple more shots and one more for m’lady.” He said pointing at you as his eyebrows wiggled. You giggled at this new persona he had taken on.

He downed a shot and didn’t even shudder at the taste. “Ya know my reunion was today.”

“Was it?” You asked taking a sip from your own bottle.

“Yeah.” He giggled out.

“Did you have fun?”

“Yeah. I did.” He gave you a smile, you watched as he laughed it off, the corners of his mouth dipping downward. “Actually ya know what I didn’t.” His eyes never left yours, the joy that was in his voice was slowly disappearing by the second. “You know my ex was there.” He let out a dry laugh, “Almost my ex wife. She called it off two weeks before the wedding.” His eyes glossed over, he blinked a couple times before letting out a laugh. “But what are you gonna do.” He picked up his beer and chugged it.

Your eyes widened at his confession. You never even knew Colin was dating anyone before he came to Easttown, much less engaged. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” He watched your reaction and in seeing your eyes look at him with worry he quickly changed the subject. “Are those peanuts any good?” He tipped his drink towards the basket of them that was placed in front of you. He reached out and popped some into his mouth before drowning them with another swing. He lifted up his empty bottle and clinked it against yours. “Cheers to peanuts.” You reached your hand out towards him and gently rested it on his own.

He looked down and your hand before pressing on with his story. “Yeah. Uhhhh yeah it all happened so fast. And I don’t even know how it happened.” He chuckled darkly, his eyes not meeting your own. He stared down at his hands, moving the bottle back and forth. “I woke up one day and she went nope! Not in love with you anymore!” He let out a loud laugh at this, giggling to himself, people glanced over at his shaking figure. “Just ya know let me put my bagel down.” He imitated holding his morning bagel, as if setting the scene for you. Ya know what I mean.” He sniffled. “I don’t know.” He pulled his hand back from under yours, running it down his face. “I’m getting to that age where, like like where I’m starting to look at my life.” He stumbled all over his words, doing his best to form sentences in between giggling. “Like I look at it and it’s like what I thought it would be like annnnd-“ He struggled to find the words his smile fading and in its place a solemn look took over. “And here’s what it actually is.”

You gave him a sympathetic smile. He ran his hands up and down his arms, trying to calm himself down. He let out another laugh, his face crinkling up to the point where you couldn’t even see his eyes. “Am I making any fucking sense?”

You looked down at your own drink, which like Colin’s served a purpose. “Yeah you are, I mean I always thought I’d be something more than I am ya know.” You turned yourself to face him. “I always thought I was going to do big things, to be someone ya know. And instead of I’m just floating through life.” He nodded along to your confession. You glanced over at him, it seemed this thing with his ex was bugging him much more than he was letting on.

“Colin.”

“Hmm?” He lifted his head to look at you.

“You know if you ever need someone to talk to I’m always gonna be here.” You reached your hand for his again, he flinched slightly at the action. You ran your thumb gently along the veins on his hand, he relaxed under your touch. “You know that right? You don’t have to keep it all in.” He watched you with watery eyes opening his mouth to say something. But before he could a loud yell interrupted him.

“COLINNN!!! SHOTSSSS!!!” You looked up to see two men on the other side of the room calling for him, their voices slurring together. You turned back to Colin just in time to see him quickly wiping the tears from his eyes. He sniffled and put a smile back on.

“Fuck yeah!” He called out and slid off the stool to join them. You caught his hand as he was leaving.

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay?” His eyes were still watery and his nose was red and sniffly, but he had a forced smile on his face. As if on cue he was switching back to his original drunk state of flirty and fun.

“Oh course I am m’lady.” He pulled you closer and you nearly fell off the stool. “Unless you don’t want me to go cause you want me here with you.” He leaned in closer, his breath fanning out, reaking of alcohol. You pushed him back gently by his chest.

“I think you should go home Colin. I can take you.”

“Nah.” He said with a big gesture. “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me pretty girl.” He stumbled towards you and gave you a sloppy kiss on the lips, he pulled off with a loud pucker. He was already going to join his friends on the other side of the bar before you even realized what had happened.

You glanced down at your own drink, you hadn’t even taken more than two sips of it. But now you found it completely unappetizing, you slid it away and payed your tab. You didn’t want to leave Colin there but it was getting late. You pulled your coat closer to yourself as you stepped out into the cold night. You had driven there and you could probably drive back, you hadn’t drunken that much but you thought aganist it.

You made your way along the pathway, stopping at the all night bakery of a late night snack. You waited in the line for a while before finally paying and taking your desserts with a grateful smile. As you made your way out of the shop there was a man stumbling on the other side of the street. You squinted your eyes and when he passed under the streetlight you realized it was Colin. You called out for him but he couldn’t seem to hear you. You looked both way before sprinting across the street towards him. He saw your approaching figure and held his arms out towards you a big smile on his face. “Heeeeeyyyy (y/n).” He pulled you into a big hug, crushing your desserts in between your bodies. He breathed in the scent of your hair, before finally realizing you. “What are you doing here?”

You ignored his question and asked one of your own. “Colin are you okay?”

He smiled wide at you, his eyes red and tired. “Of course. I’m um I’m heheh I’m great I’m umm-“ He broke out laughing at his own attempt to form a sentence. He was doubled over now, choking on his own laughs. You watched as his laughter turned into tears, loud sobs, shaking his whole body. He clung to the sleeve of your jacket and yanked you closer you, he began to slump down kneeing on the floor in front of you his arms wrapped tightly around your waist as he cried into your coat. You kneeled down next to him and wrapped your arms tightly around him, forcing down your own tears that were forming at watching him break. “Why-y” he hiccuped out, his voice still muffled by your coat. “Why did she leave me.” He cried out. “She just came up to me and told me that she didn’t love me anymore.” He sniffled and roughly began to wipe the tears from his face with the palms of his hands. He pulled back to look at you. “How can someone just do that? How can someone you love so much just decide one day they don’t love you back?”

“I don’t know.” You rubbed circles into his back. “I don’t know honey, but I do know that she didn’t deserve you. She doesn’t deserve someone who cares so much that he’ll do anything for her, that he loves her so much even the mention of her breaks him. She must have been truly heartless. Because how could someone fall out of love with the most perfect man in the world.” He lifted his head up to look at you. You felt you face turn red and averted your gaze continuing on. “You are the sweetest most kindest man I’ve ever known. You care so much about everyone around you, and make everyone you come into contact with happy. You have this way of making us all laugh without even knowing it. And you don’t need her because you have so many other people in this town that love you.”

He let out a dry laugh. “Oh yeah, like who? ”

“Well like me-“ Your eyes widened at what you had said, you cursed yourself at letting that slip. You pressed on hoping he didn’t hear you. “Like Mare and-“

“Wait.” He looked up at you with soft eyes. “Did you say you love me?” You looked over at him, taking in his drunken state and his disheveled appearance. He was very drunk chances were he wasn’t going to remember this in the morning. You smiled softly at him.

“Yeah, I love you pretty boy.” He just leaned his head onto your shoulder, snuggling himself even closer.

“Please tell me again that you love me.”

You brushed his hair back from his face. “I love you. I love you. I love you-“ As you whispered it to him you knew he was never going to remember any of this is the morning. You knew that after you walked him home and put him to bed this would all become a drunken blur. Nothing more than then a dream he could never remember. But that didn’t matter to you right now, you didn’t care if he loved you back at this moment, you just needed him to know he was loved. And that he was worthy of it.

Tags: @xmaximoffic