#maybe it’s just the fact that in the wig he looked like a girl I knew in high school and I had already assigned her hot so u know

[dcxdpdabbles]

Excuse me? I really love your work and I was just wondering if we can get another chapter of Passion for Fashion?? I really love that but no rush whether or not u wanna. (Also, I'd love to see the Batfam or croc or anyone be educated WHAT KC actually is lololol I just think it would be fun.)

Danny stares at the man across from him with barely concealed bemusement. Red Robin hides behind his menu, muttering about all the pizza toppings.

It seemed pineapple was a must, and he fought not to wrinkle his nose as various people shot their table side glances. He's noticed the staring since they changed, but Danny is tired of the lingering gawking.

He gets that his date looks suspicious in his get-up, but it's not the worst.

They had to stop at a second-hand store, where he went in to buy a trench coat, a pair of large sunglasses, and a fedora, per Red Robin's request. While inside the store, Red Robin somehow produced a blond wig and some makeup, changing his features just slightly so that he appeared to be a different person.

They both stop at a local gas station to change outfits and finish their prep work in the bathrooms.

Danny had gone in sweats, a stained shirt, and mismatched shoes—he had not been expecting a date—but when he left, he came out wearing an experimental style Dan had found.

It was called Corp Goth, and he secretly adored it. Maybe Sam was onto something when she said a pure black offit made anyone attractive.

It was a form-fitting black jeans, a top with a darker shade of black long-sleeve shirt, and a flowing black trench coat. Dan had included various jewelry pieces, with strict instructions on where to put them so that the style was "balanced," it gave him the slightest hints of old-style rock aesthetics.

Danny felt good about his clothes until Red Robin saw him. He didn't think he was that bad-looking, but if it caused the other to run into a streetlight, Danny would hate to think what other less kind people would say.

"Would Hawiian be alright?" Red Robin finally asks, his voice just a tad bit high. Is he that nervous to be seen by people?

Danny raises a brow. "If that's what you like. I'll do whatever you want me to."

The other teenager—is he? He looks older now with his make-up—a few years—and makes a strange choking sound. "Okay."

"Alright. So now that we know what to tell the waitress when she comes here, can we return to the fact you broke through my window?" Danny asks, leaning back in his seat and crossing his legs to get comfortable.

A girl nearby chocks on her water, making Danny's head snap in her direction. Her friends quickly pat her back and urgently speak to the blushing girl. When he confirms she is all right, Danny returns his gaze to Red Robin.

He is taken aback by the sharp attention now being aimed at him. Yes, he can't exactly see the other eyes behind those dark sunglasses, but he feels the heavy stare all the same. "I want to discuss your connection to Killer Croc and the Infinite Realms."

Danny considers it. On the one hand, he can't talk about his secret mission, but on the other, he needs to find some information about this place. He's gotten bored wandering around, tinkering with things while the fashion contest dragged on.

They have been here for months and have made no headway in helping Batman. Heck, Danny has yet to even see him. If anything maybe this guy will know some information.

But he thinks he shouldn't lay all his cards just yet. So, he needs to bend the truth a little.

"There isn't much to tell about Killer. He was involved in our kidnapping a few days ago. I guess they hired him without explaining what the job was since he came to apologize for almost trafficking us." Danny shrugs, thinking over his answer as he takes a small sip of his soda, missing his mouth slightly. He quickly catches some of the spilled drink with his tongue, mentally debating himself for being so clumsy. There is a gasp from the same girl three tables away.

Danny fights the urge to sink into his seat as he ignores her. "He said he sells drugs, not people. How he tracked us down is anyone's guess, but since he came all the way in person, I figured I should invite him in and offer him a drink."

Red Robin tilts his head. "Why?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why would you invite him in and offer him a drink?"

"Ugh, 'cause it's good manners?" Honestly, did big-city folks really have no sense of being civil? Amity Park has a small population, but there are enough people to be called a city, and none of them have ever been confused by the idea of being invited in for a drink.

Red Robin considers this answer before he leans forward. "How about your connection to the Infinite Realms?"

Here, Danny carefully selects his replies, ensuring that all his answers are accurate, just not in the way the others will get. "You can say it was my parents, but mostly my mom. She was the one who made the final step and connected the family to the Realms."

"Your mom? Where is she?"

"Dead," Danny whispers, thinking of his own mom, whom he hasn't seen in weeks. He wonders if she or his dad has noticed him missing yet. If they have reported it.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

Red Robin looks down at his hands in silence in a show of respect. Danny can appreciate it. However, that doesn't last long before he lifts his head again, this time with a stubborn little tilt to his mouth.

"That wasn't a full explanation of how the Infinite Releams involve you or your brother."

Danny shrugs. "It's how we got our meta powers. The portal to the other side opened on Dan and me, triggering our ice and glowing eyes. We've been inside it a few times, but the portal sealed shut the last time. We haven't been able to go back."

"That's why you here," Red Robin says in great realization. "Gotham has enough death in it that it helps your powers."

Not really, but they can work with that. Danny smiles, putting one finger up against his lips, and Red Robin is true to his name by turning a lovely red hue. Danny hasn't seen anyone blush that hard since Jonny 13 when the other asked him out on a date.

It's cute.

"That and it's also the cheapest living city. Dan really has his heart set on being a fashion designer so we need to save money on fabrics and stuff."

"You're his model. Have you always wanted to go into modeling?"

"Not really. I like mechanical engineering more. Maybe when I finish helping Dan, I'll look for a school to apply to." Danny shrugs, leaning forward to give the other a smirk.

Star once told him that Danny's slow up and down was his best flirting technique after he had done her math homework for her. In return, she agreed to help him get better at dating.

He's not sure how well her lessons had gone, seeing as he still struggled to get a date back home (with the living anyone), but he thinks some of it was right since Red Robin goes even redder, if that's possible.

"Enough about me. How did you get involved in smashing widows and looking tasty in spandex?"

"I-um- well funny enough I-" Whatever he was going to say is lost as a figure jumps down from the darkness, landing on their table. Danny yelps, pushing himself away, but in doing so, he falls backward since his chair is not meant to be leaned like that.

He crashes to the ground with a swear, closing his eyes at the impact. The back of his head stings a little, as Danny slowly cracks open his eyes and stares upwards- at...a man in a bat suit?

"Moby Dick! Are you Batman!" He gasps, finally feeling like they are about to make a step forward in their mission.

The man glares down at him before grunting. "Red Robin. Retreat to cave."

"But-"

"Now"

Then he throws a smoke bomb on the ground. Danny leaps up, but both men are gone by the time the smoke clears. "Wait! Mr. Batman, sir, I need to talk to you!"

There is no reply, just the girls filming with their phones and the sound of speeding cars. Danny kicks the ground. "Oh come on!"

When he wanders home, he finds Dan lying face down on the ground with various ice cream tubs surrounding him. On some pieces of paper are various-sized hearts, the initials "DF + KC" inside them.

Dan is singing heartbreak sounds into the carpet, muffled by his tears.

"Dan, man, have some dignity. You knew the EverBurning for like ten minutes."

The muffled crying gets louder, and Danny rolls his eyes. He slumps onto the couch with a sigh. "Listen, I think I got a lead on Batman. It's a man dressed like a bat. How hard can it be to find him?"

His clone-turn-twin raises one hand, pointing to a smashed button Danny missed when entering the living room. Upon closer inspection, he is startled to find out that it's a miniature microphone and tracker. There is a very tiny symbol on the side.

"Did Red Robin bug our house after breaking our window!?" he asks in outrage as Dan nods. "To think I flirted with him!"

Dan sobs louder. "I tried flirting with the best tail I have ever seen in my life and you got a date with a stalker! We're going to die alone!"

Danny really hopes they finish this stupid mission soon. He's getting tempted to let Clockwork's bomb take him.

[keepyourpantsongohan]

Ayesha Liveblogs Spy x Family S1

"Proof that the foreign minister wears a toupée. I even have the negatives." "Well done. Now we can force him to resign." How could this possibly be enough to force a resignation? Is wearing a toupée a sign of dishonesty or shame in this cultural context??

"In an era in which the nations of the world were waging a fierce war of information just out of sight, this man survived the battlefield by being a master of disguise." Ooooh is this a historical anime? How fun!

Update from 1 minute later: The newspaper confirms this as a Cold War-era story!! Colour me intrigued

"Farewell. May you find happiness." What a polite end to such a callous breakup LMAO

Why does Donovan Desmond look so incredibly haunted LOL

"In order to achieve this [spy mission] you will get married and have a child." Ah, there we are with the premise!

Of all the spy strengths they've displayed thus far, I am most impressed with this blond man's ability to pull a newspaper apart without bending it. You must need to generate a lot of force:

"Yeah, sure. Take whichever one you want." This is about the average regard for orphans in Shonen Anime Societies

"This little girl happened to be a telepath." She's a WHAT NOW? What a casual way to introduce this fact

Honestly the random facts about what Anya likes and the bursting into tears with unclear motivation seems very much a realistic parent and child experience

"I just don't understand this irrational behaviour." I love how quickly Loid Forger aka Twilight, International Spy, has been foiled by this tiny, psychic child

Loid is approaching parenthood very casually so far. Surely a spy (pretending to be a psychologist, even) can recognize the psychological impact of abandonment on a child

Fjlkjfljflf what kind of society allows Loid to barricade his six (or maybe four) year-old child inside their apartment unsupervised all day LMAOOO

SCREAM not Anya immediately revealing their location from playing spy games. Also a very realistic problem to have

"Boss, I think we should just give up on the toupée." [Pulls out a gun and shoots him] "Transparency is essential in government. Toupées are a no-go." WHY ON EARTH ARE TOUPÉES THE ULTIMATE SPY PLOT DEVICE JFKJFJF

Love that the betrayal of the nation is SECOND to the toupée. They said: Wigs are for liars and cowards

"No one reached out their hand to save me. I felt alone, in despair, and so powerless all I could do was cry." We have unlocked Loid's parental instincts AND his tragic backstory in the span of 1 and a half minutes

"I'm a failure as a spy? No. My mistake was putting that little girl in danger to begin with. How could I forget? To create a world where children won't have to cry... That's why I became a spy." Alright Loid, colour me charmed:

Ahhhhhh I love Loid giving his enemy the chance to go back to his daughter instead of attacking him

Loid deciding to take Anya back with him despite all his misgivings bc he wants to give her a home 🥺💘 HE'S NICE

"Papa is a huge liar. But he's such a cool liar." Awww, Anya

I can see how being psychic and being able to hear every single child's confusion during a test would be distracting

"I... relaxed? What the hell is going on with me?" FATHERHOOD

"It is mandatory that the applicant attend with both parents. Absolutely no exceptions." For a society with such a cavalier approach to violence and orphans (at least where Loid goes), you'd think they'd be more accepting of single parents

Everyone's absolutely on Yor's ass for being a single 27-year-old. [Yor as Charlotte Lucas voice] I'm 27 years old. I have no money and no prospects. I'm already a burden to my brother—

"I have a client for you, Thorn Princess." Is Thorn Princess Yor's sleeper agent activation phrase? Her whole face darkened

Clearly Yor doesn't have the same violence-aversion as Loid:

Yor ready to fall in love with anyone who's nice to her. Mgkjgkg but same perhaps

"A spy...An assassin...? I'm... so excited!" [Narrator voiceover] "The little girl was straving for entertainment." The narrator's interjections are very funny

HAHAHAHA I love that they're both trying to fake date each other for very different reasons. Incredible, 10/10, love this

It's fun that Franky, spy gadget guy, is also now mission back-up

Also I take back everything I said about Loid's violence aversion

"I'll be sure to tell your brother that you came alone." Why is every woman that Yor works with (and, it seems, every woman with more than one line in this show thus far) seem to be so mean-spirited LOL

HFHLKHGLHGLGH Loid showing up to the party covered in blood and introducing himself as her husband when she needed a boyfriend. We love a spy who is terrible at his job

Loid managing to somehow make a really amazing impression on this party by being hot and defending Yor's past as a masseuse (murderer). GOOD FOR HIM

"The concussive recovery method is the latest in modern medical practices." Imagine going to your doctor for a prescription and having them kickbox you into submission LMAO

"Um, Loid-san, this may not be the best moment to ask, but why don't we get married?" SCREAMING AT YOR BEING THE ONE TO PROPOSE AND HOW KNOCKS THE WIND OUT OF LOID:

"No matter what hardships await us, let us be there for one another." [Explosions go off in the background] Colour me sold on this grenade-pin ring and spy-assassin romance

I love that they're going on a little family outing to prep for their interview

I can also understand how a political rally would be stressful for Anya

"I've completed countless missions, yet once again I find myself losing heart." Loid will eventually get used to his girls who are obssessed with nuts and knives 💞

All of them calling attention to themselves by helping an old lady deal with a purse snatcher ❣️ I love this family. I've only had the Forgers for two episodes but if anything happened to them I would [redact] everyone in this room and then myself

"I guess... receiving thanks every once in a while wouldn't hurt." "Papa is a softie." YEAH HE IS

"Papa and Mama are flirting." "No we are not!" HEE HEE

"Anya, are you going to be okay in this crowd?" Dad Mode Activated

Ohhhhhhh Anya helping the cow through her fear. Baby!!!!

OHGHGLGHLKGH setting aside how they managed to have at least three outfits in that suitcase, I really want to know how the quick change is happening in the middle of this cobblestone pathway to the school

"Why are you getting irritated, Loid? She's not even your real wife." I love that whenever someone makes an out-of-pocket insult to Yor (her coworker calling her a whore, this dorm master critiquing her lack of cooking) Loid jumps in and he's like, HEY, THAT'S MY WIFE

"My Papa and Mama are both so much fun, and I love them very much. I want to be with them forever." I also want this family to stay together forever, Anya 💗

Both Yor and Loid ready to fight this jerk for making their daughter cry!! I love them

The hope that Loid has because of his new family. This is really fulfilling a deepseated psychological need that I had to watch an anime that's just about a nice man

"He might just be the best spy in Westalis, so don't worry too much." With all due respect, that doesn't say much for the other spies, considering how suspiciously Loid acts everywhere he goes

Yor genuinely considering murdering someone to get her daughter into school 💝 Parenting!

"I appreciate the attempt at consolation, my elegant boy." This is how I will be responding to all attempts for someone to comfort me from now on

Loid just carrying a party popper around in his pocket for when Anya gets in. I LOVE HEEEM

Loid can waste government resources on a little play mission for his family. As a treat

"He's requesting agents. As many as possible," incredible how Loid immediately folds to his daughter's request to be attacked by enemies LMAOOO

HAHAHAHA Loid telling them in morse code it's an imperative part of Operation Strix, which is technically true, but not at all for any reason they would think

The way they're all like, "I will JUMP at the chance to attack Loid, been waiting my whole life for this," is also really fun

I was waiting for the spy costume. I am so glad it is a plot point

I can't decide what I enjoy more, Loid's blush over having to put on the costume mask, or the way the other spies are fangirling over him

Loid getting his butt kicked by Yor in this drunk roleplay does make me wonder if we're going to see that her assassination missions run contrary to his goals of peacekeeping

"I've come to save you, Princess Anya." "Papa!" "Wait, I'm supposed to be your dad in this?" AWWWW ANYA JUST WANTED TO HER DAD TO ACT OUT SAVING HER

In fairness to Anya's fear of kidnapping, she has been kidnapped before!

"Though, you're usually on the ball, so [discussing Operation Strix Phase 2] may not be necessary." "Well... I may actually be off my game lately." At least Loid's willing to own up to it LMAOOO

Firstly, what happened just now was definitely an attempted [redacted] crime, which is hideously uncalled for, what the fuck. But secondly: I love Yor and Anya bonding time

"I know it's really dangerous to be an Eden student now. But it won't be as scary if I train. I can do my best at school without dying!" I do love the idea of teaching this tiny child fighting techniques, but my god, what a thing to say

"Even if I can't be like a normal mother, I'm going to do everything I can for her." YOOOOOOOOOOOOR I love you

"She's already realized how amazing I am and fallen for me." Incredible confidence from Damian Desmond, Very Rich Six-Year-Old LMAO

"Mama, you liar. Smiling didn't help at all." I am very entertained by Anya's psychic child conflict management

Ffjhfkhfk I really do love the way that Anya tries her best to do things in a way that her parents would most approve of. Smiling first, trying to not get in trouble in front of the teacher when she punches Damian, claiming defence of a friend. She's a good kid!

What will Loid, who is not actually a psychologist, be doing during the day while Anya goes to school and his wife does her work. I hope it involves costumes

Update from 1 minute later: At the very least, it involves stalking elementary students from a rooftop

Update from 4 minutes later: IT DID INVOLVE COSTUMES!

Also. Also. How the hell would Loid's plan work if his daughter was NOT psychic. Like yeah yeah yeah, she knows she's supposed to be a good student. But it doesn't seem like he's explicitly told her out loud to be friends with Damian. So is he just hoping for her organic success? It's a good thing his baby knows exactly what he's thinking LMAO

I love that Becky has decided to be Anya's no. 1 supporter. She needs a friend!!

"Why do I find it so hard to speak when she's in front of me?" In a very expected turn of events, lil Damian has a crush:

"Plan B is done for." You are wrong Loid! Plan Befriend has simply turned to Plan Boy Has a Crush on Your Daughter

This at-home tutoring really resonates with my experience of being the child of Asian parents with high expectations when it comes to their children's innate talent for math

"No, Yor. You're not a stranger, nor part of someone else's family. Right now, you're the mother of the Forgers. I'm counting on you to provide whatever I'm lacking." AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I love the Forgers

I loveeee this parenting discussion around positive reinforcement

"I wonder what it'd feel like to have a real family," said Loid, tits deep in a family and fatherhood

"My sister got married?" I was waiting for this ball to drop. Can't wait!

NOT BABY BROTHER YURI BEING EMPLOYED BY THE TORTURE DEPARTMENT OF THE GOVERNMENT OMG

"[Twilight] is the villain who is trying to make this world fall into chaos. You could call him my natural enemy." NOT BABY BROTHER YURI ANNOUNCING HIS INTENTIONS TO MERC HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW WHO HE'S ABOUT TO MEET AT DINNER:

I gotta say, despite them introing with assassinations, I do feel like Yuri represents a drastic tone shift for this show

"Yuri... I mean, my younger brother is coming here today! [Loid's voice raises several octaves] "Today?" The voice crack was funny. Back to family shenanigans

As a sister. I AM SICK OF THE SISTER COMPLEX JOKES. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, BABY BROTHER YURI, ANIME AS A GENRE, AND WHATEVER JAPANESE SOCIETAL NORM THAT ALLOWS THIS TO BE A CONSTANT IN SO MANY DIFFERENT STORIES?

"What could my sister possibly like about this guy?! Just because he can cook a little, and he's handsome, and tall, and considerate, and a doctor," It sounds like Yuri is talking himself into having a crush on Loid????

Wow, Loid has made Yuri as an intelligence agent within like, mere minutes of meeting him. Maybe Loid is a great spy!

Ahhhh, so the reason Yor took up killing as a job was to put her little brother through school. How honourable!

"Kiss here and now." I can't decide if this is terrible or fun. Maybe both. My money is on Anya interrupting to see her Uncle

I do appreciate that Yor has never been kissed! It makes sense, given her murder job, and I feel like we don't often get 20somethings without prior entanglements

HDJHDKJDHDHD this is so unhinged and weird. Jesus. Yuri Briar puts the B in Behnchod

"Loid Forger. You may lay claim to my sister's lips for now." WHAT A THING TO SAY

"So, let's do everything we can to make sure Yor is happy." Loid is THE Husband. There are no other husbands, just him!

"Children are so curiously observant at times," said Loid, about his daughter who is literally telepathic

"It's a terrible idea to date a woman while deceiving her," said Loid, as if that has not been the premise of his ENTIRE romantic history thus far

I think Loid is starting to develop (romantic) feelings:

You know, I haven't really commented on the horn cap thing, but I do wonder if they are to do with Anya's powers rather than just a fun little design thing

I need you to see what I'm looking at when they tell me this is Bill Watkins, Age Six:

I do like all the montages of how all of these children (and Bill Watkins, Deeply Suspicious Age Six) were preparing for this dodgeball tournament

SCREAM THE CUT TO THE DRAGON BALL Z NAMEK BACKGROUND

Damian taking the dodgeball bullet for Anya. Love u little guy

Calling it right now, with all this lead-up, I don't think Anya's throw is going to work out the way she wants

Update from a few seconds later: Yep, that was correct!

Gnjghkgjhgkjhg Loid loves Anya too much to be strict with her so he is engaging in quite a permissive parenting style

ANYA TRYING TO SAVE THE LITTLE BOY FROM DROWNING WHEN SHE'S JUST A LITTLE GIRL HERSELF. SWEETEST BABY ALIVE

DAD'S HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANYA EARNING HER FIRST STELLA! YEAH BABYGIRL

I like how they do a count of her Stellas (merit points which lead to the Imperial Scholar Society of Parent War Instigation) and Tonitrus Bolts (demerit points which lead to expulsion) whenever Anya gets closer to her goal

Also, bonkers that getting a Stella doesn't cancel out your Bolt? It's like, forgive, but never forget

Fhkhfkjfhfkjh Anya deciding she'll only respond to Starlight Anya. Very Six-Year-Old Behaviour

"Do you really think we go to some third-rate school that would hand out a Stella by mistake?" Damian continuing his chivalry streak

1) Extremely rude of the people to treat the dogs that way and 2) Does that big white dog's flash to the Forger family mean that we have unlocked a psychic puppy subplot?

I have been thinking since Damian was introduced that he and Anya are paralleling the Syaroan and Sakura Archetypes, but there is no greater Cardcaptor Sakura parallel than the fact this episode is called Penguin Park

"Please wait, Papa, who is a good and normal person." 10/10 spy deception Anya, no notes

Gghkhgkghkg Loid being yelled at by his Spy Juice Lady for not prioritizing this other mission. How does no one overhear this!!

"Mama, I'm being kidnapped," said Anya, as if she did not latch onto this spy herself to help out her dad's Penguin Mission

It's incredible how many of Loid's problems are solved just by him being hot:

Awwwwww I'm glad they did some actual family time after the Aquarium mission. Also I love how embarrassed Loid is every time has to do something silly, like pretending to be a Penguin Plushy for his kid, but how he'll immediately do it, even in public. Best dad!!

"Being both a Papa and an agent... must be tough balancing the two." Real and true, spy chauffeur

I love how they do parallel plots between family stuff and spy stuff. Anya looking for a puppy... Dad looking for bomb dogs!

They are in fact explaining the psychic puppy subplot

"It is far too early for Anya-san to get married!" Yor, I would like to study the way your mind works (also mom's here!!!!!!!!!!!!)

UHHHHHHHHHHHHHH EXTREMELY TRAUMATIZING FOR ANYA TO HAVE TO WATCH HER DAD'S IMMINENT DEATH BY EXPLOSION THROUGH DOG-O-VISION

That was an incredibly morose diatribe from The Handler, who is the only spy other than Loid to get a title/name

How is this baby supposed to disarm a bomb?!?!?!??

Ahhhh, by leaving a ketchup message for her dad on the door that says "NO! (Drawing of Bomb)" Of course! We love a girl who knows how to improvise

Dad has got back in the danger zone to stop the last of the Foreign Affairs Minister's terrorist threats, fair enough! I really hope they don't make him [redacted violence involving animal]

OH THANK GOD THEY HAD HIM ATTACK THE VEST AND NOT THE DOG—I WAS PRETTY CONFIDENT THEY WOULDN'T DO THAT TO LOID, BUT YOU NEVER KNOW WITH ANIME

From Yor's perspective, Loid has been in the bathroom for two full episodes

Yor kicking Keith the Radicalized Student Terrorist's car off the road after he has been discovered by Anya and foiled by Loid. We love a team effort!

"How many times must I tell you not to run off alone because it's dangerous?!" [Tearfully] "I'm sowwy." Awwww a very reasonable worry for your daughter who keeps running into every spy mission she possibly can

"I also had a daughter about her age." The Handler's tragic backstory unlocked?!

"Be prepared to take care of him until the end. I may have no right to say those words." Loid's dog care advice has accidentally turned into existential dread about adopting a child for the sake of a peacekeeping mission

Awwwwwww Yor taking cooking classes from her workplace enemy to be a better cook for her family

"Camilla-san has always been a nice person," said Yor, about the woman who called her a whore in front of a room full of people and tried to scald her with hot food on like Episode 2

"The more I savour each bite, the more I see my life flash before my eyes." Say what you will about Weird Brother Yuri, he is supportive

Admittedly this cooking lesson episode has made me like Camilla

HAHAHAHA the "They are whispering" caption so the viewer can understand why no one's reacting to the yelling about spy intel on Scruffy's potential lover

Awwwwwww Loid opting out of the family outing to comfort his little scruffy friend, who I have just re-learned is named Franky

LMAOOOOO at them just having Henderson-sensei do literally all of the classes. Top-tier writing

The Handler now has unlocked TWO new names, which are Sylvia Sherwood and Fullmetal Lady

"On the one day each month that Mister Moon goes away, Anya's power to read minds goes away too." Oooooh new psychic baby lore unlocked

Even though I don't care for Weird Brother Yuri, it is nice that Anya has someone outside of her parents to rely on for tutoring

Loid covering for Incompetent Spy Daybreak jkhfkhfkjhf

I love that Loid broke into the school, not to boost his daughter's grades, but rather to check that she didn't fail and leave it that way, and then reverse cheat (as in, undo someone's wrongdoing) to make sure two other students got their earned grades. What a man!

Ffljlfjjflkj Becky objectifying Anya's dad. I know they're six, but it's not a trope I love

"I was trying to report the cigarette I found, then he punched me." I know this is a scheme but what kind of society has SIX-YEAR-OLDS plausibly smoking???

"Second Son wouldn't do that! Anya was watching." Heck yeah Anya standing up for Damian (even though her Damian motives are decidedly ulterior LOL)

"Don't try to drag me into these adult matters in the first place!" An incredibly reasonable request from Damian

Gdljljggjglkj I love these kids telling Glooman 'Actually, the biggest problem is you have a bad personality' True and real and cutting

"Don't worry. The West is a safe place." ANYAAAA. Something something children and their ability to see people outside of the confines of politics

"There's saltwater pouring out of my eyes." The implication that George has not cried once in his six years of life LMAOOOO

Genuinely heartwarming to see all these kids singing for George and giving away their favourite school items for his sake (also I bet you $5 he doesn't actually have to quit this school)

Update from two minutes later: I was correct lol

I've been thinking about this since the hospital volunteering, but it is kind of a flaw in Loid's spy tactics to choose a public-facing job, because at any point someone could just walk into the hospital and realize he doesn't work there kjhgkjhgg like he should've just been some sort of private practice

Loid running home to "check on what Yor was doing at the school" but actually using it as an excuse to ask her on a lunch date <3

As if the show could psychically tell that I was wondering about it, they are now forcing Loid into a "Take Your Kid to Work Day" situation lmaooo

"[Loid] became an important part of our team as soon as he transferred in." How is Loid an important part of the staff if he's constantly out of hospital doing spy stuff??? How is he even capable of giving psychological care???

"To go with the rest of the facade, a number of my coworkers have also inflitrated this hospital." Ah, perhaps the fact he has a research position and other spies in the hospital is enough to cover his absences and maybe make him have fake patients

Honestly, it's a wonder Anya hasn't run into more problems in the spy realm recently other than getting stuck in a secret passage

HHGKJHGKJHGKJGH Loid taking Anya's improvised sandbox of toys as a sign of deep psychological distress

"He golfs at his workplace and creates shady channels." In every class there is one child who has the most chaotic possible interpretation of their parents' job (the kid who says their parent stabs people for money when really their parent is a tattoo artist) and Anya has decided to be that student

"But if Mrs. Forger just happened to retire, that position would have to be filled, would it not?" Why is Fiona so comically evil about getting to fake marry Loid

"But... this woman doesn't seem to have any flaws in her appearance." Even Father-snatcher Fiona Frost thinks Yor is hot

"To think the great Twilight is stuck playing house.. It's a disservice to the world." Loid said: Fuck you Fiona, I like playing house!

This silent spy standoff has certainly taken a turn:

I actually kind of love that Loid is faced with someone else who has feelings for him, because I KNOW for certain he will choose Yor, and I think that's good for Yor to see

"You're already working hard enough, Yor. That's why Anya is so fond of you. I couldn't ask you to do anything more." HE LOVES HERRRRR

I really resonate with Yor's Girls Who Are Bad At Stuff representation kjhgkgjh

"Agent Penguin suffered honourable injuries in battle." Loid sewing up his daughter's penguin stuffy and making up a backstory for their dog chewing him up ❤️ I love hiiiim

I appreciate that Fiona confirms from someone who knew him before Loid has been changed by love (for Yor and Anya)

NOT THE DOUBLE FAKE TENNIS COUPLE NAMES BEING TWAIN AND NAFALIA PHONY

Though, now that I think of it, I guess Loid's given last name is Forger, so really this is a pattern of very silly names

"We've been developing a new doping agent called OSO-R along with the government in preparation for the upcoming East-West Sports Exhibition." Every so often they dip back into the crime world, and today it's sports doping

"I wonder what her relationship with Loid is." Yor babygirl, you do not need to worry about her, Loid is fully Team Yor

I love this little look into all the different things that come up in an infiltration (having to be very good at specific things like tennis, dealing with potential poisons, compensating for traps)

"You're still young, and you're clearly talented. From now on, hone your craft properly. I'm sure you'll become an amazing player." "Twain, I'll really do my best from now on!" Aside from being an incredible professional tennis player, Loid's talents also include reforming his opponents into better people:

Fhfhfkjhfkfjhf Loid every time Fiona comes near Yor: Hey, please leave my wife alone

"Come at me with everything you've got." "Uh, don't, Fiona." Loid knows Yor has enough physical might to beat a hundred tennis players

Yor wanting Loid to praise her for winning the match 🥺❤️

Loid taking Yor on a reassurance date to let her know she's still #1

"Wait, does Yor have romantic feelings for me?!" TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH, BUT YOU GOT THERE, LOID

NOT LOID IMMEDIATELY SWITCHING TO PLAN HONEY TRAP AND YOR ACCIDENTALLY KICKING SOME SENSE TO HIM

"I can't let my guard down like that. Somehow, being with Yor throws me off." Loid, you stupid man, who can't see that him AND his wife have feelings for each other

"I would love for you to continue being Anya's mother. And to continue in the role of my wife." This is the most honest thing Loid has said in hours

Anya getting Becky a keychain because she didn't think she was allowed to get one for herself!! Sweet girl

What kind of father has ZERO time to interact with his son LMAO (Donovan Desmond, apparently)

"Anya's a little scared because she's not sure if Papa loves her or not. He always gets mad at me. But I believe in him because I love him." ANYAAAAAAAAAA

Papa Desmond and his truly haunting eyes finally make an on-screen appearance and meeting with Loid:

"Even the child that shares your blood is a stranger." Is this a general view from Donovan on his parent-child relationships or is this a shot at Loid for not being Anya's biological father?

"People will never be able to understand each other." What a thing to say about your six-year-old, who is standing right in front of you with his friends

"What's truly important is to continue walking them despite [not understanding each other]. I decided that I would accept her regardless, and I try to find every opportunity I can to talk to her." Loid laying spy ground work on top of challenging Donovan to be a better father. We love a man who can multitask

"I'm pretty sure she doesn't actually dislike you. It'd make me happy if you could be friends with her." "Well, I want to, too..." Gjhgjhgjhfjlfj Loid is also working on Operation Playdate

This has been a pretty delightful show so far. Spy x Family proving to everyone you can fight people AND be nice!!!!

[bl00dlight]

@lady-phasma @lilyofthevalley-11

I think I've cracked the code.

So in the trailer we get this scene:

A few CLIPS right before we get...

I just wanna point out we KNOW for a FACT that the brothel where the madame works is called 'Cock Inn'....

And we KNOW in the first episode Aegon is going to take Aemond back to the brothel as 'celebration' for killing Luke:

I'm 80% sure these are apart of that sequence. It's similar lighting, and literally the scenes follow each other in the trailer? That can't be a coincidence? We know we are getting a brothel scene for certain now, where else in the show would women with sexy fans be?

That would explain why there is a mystery "targaryen" because we KNOW prostitutes in Westeros sometimes wear silver haired wigs for Targ men/men who want to fuck Targaryen women. It's confirmed in GOT & also... Mysaria herself says it to Daemon when he struggles getting it up.

I want to also point out

Same hairstyle as Helaena....

Same hairstyle as FLORIS FUCKING BARATHEON????

Idk who that other woman is? Potentially an Alicent reference? If so, yuck. Or maybe it's meant to be another Baratheon Daugher reference?

My hypothesis: Aegon is gonna take Aemond to Cock Inn to get him laid to "celebrate" the death of Luke. Aegon, being a cunt is going either A) going to bring out women Aemond has shown interest in?

B) The madame might bring out the silver haired girl because he is having the same problem as DAEMON?

Either way we can see homie feels ashamed about it....

OR Aegon could literally be giving Aemond a prostitute that looks like Helaena as a call back to when Aemond said "I would perform my duty, had mother only bothered us."

And Aegon is like... welp, now you can bud.

So uh, I feel like this is Helaemond confirmed. Or Helaemond alluded to. And I'm gonna remain delusional into thinking I'm right.

[yueisyum]

“You don’t get it do you” Valentine’s Day special

College au❤️Jeno x Reader

|| 🧸Basically, you’re trying to help jeno find a fake girlfriend to invite to his parents dinner next week. He’s been telling them that he has a girlfriend and they decide that they want to meet her on Valentine’s Day. Sounds cute right? But he does have a girlfriend, so you make it your mission to save his dignity. But for some reason he’s being really picky with his decision. Your not sure why?

“She literally perfect for you”

“But She’s not you”

Authors note🎈: HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!! I’m not completely proud of this as a whole, BUT if I add the fact that I only had like a day and a half to do it, it’s not that bad. There so no smut in this, BUT!!! As you know. You can’t just ask 😏. I’m hoping to maybe do something like this for some other members so if you are hoping for a specific member let me know!

[9:32] February 12th

“She’s also a no” jeno says from next to you on his couch. You slouch even more into his chest. “Jeno- this is the 5th girl I showed you. You didn’t even read the profile yet!” You complain.

You and Jeno are currently sitting in his living room looking through [app] profiles of women that had reached out to you. You got together after your run, and he had just got home from practice. You took a shower and told him about your plan to help him find a date for Tuesday. You had gotten closer to him so you can both see your phone screen clearly, and he ended up pulling you into him. Your back pressed against his chest. This would usually look weird to anyone else, considering you two are just friends, it’s natural between you two. It’s normal. Not weird. Not intimate.

“My parents know I wouldn’t date someone with that hair colour” he explains, shrugging it off. His arm that’s around you moves to swipe to the next profile. You slap his hand away and go back. “No no no, she could wear a wig or dye her hair or something” you continue to the profile and looked at the description. It was quiet short. It read:

[hi! I’m Eunchan! Im 22 years old, my birthday is august 4th, 2000. And I love to work out (do yoga) and I work as a creative writer]

You read the profile out loud, and you can feel Jeno shaking his head. “Jeno-“ you begin.

“Yoga? Absolutely not, yoga isn’t working out, it’s expensive stretching” you giggle and roll your eyes. “Jeno, just get her to tell your parents that she lifts weights or something.” You bring your knees up to your chest to make room for his cat as she lays at his feet. he takes a moment to think. “No, I have to get her to wear a wig AND lie to my parents? They would be able to tell she doesn’t lift weights by her build.” You sit up to look at him.

“You are being ridiculo-“

“-realistic” he interrupts and you scoff. You get up from the couch and walk toward the kitchen. “Where are you going!?” He gets up to follow you like a lost puppy. “If we are going to do this all night I’m going to need a drink.” You answer grabbing a glass- two glasses from the cabinet and he looks for some wine. You could faintly hear the kdrama he played from kitchen while he pour the drinks. You lean into the counter and continue looking.

“Oh here! Listen!”

“[hello, my name is minchi-“

“Hello? Who says hello?”

“Jeno shut up and listen..

[hello, my name is minchi, I’m 21 years old. My favorite colour is blue, my favorite smell is mint and I love Naruto]” you look up at him in anticipation. He loves all those things-

“That sounds like a child’s profile, she can’t even describe herself or hobbies proper-“

“Ughhh” you slouch into the counter. Grabbing the glass of wine her poured and took a long sip. He watch you with a smile. “Jeno, the point of finding you a ‘fake girlfriend’ is that it’s not real! It’s one night and she can be anything you want her to be” you explain, making your way back to the couch. Stopping to let another cat walk past you. This is their palace after all. Then take a seat at the sofa. “No they can’t” he mumbles. “Huh?” You look over at him, he’s making his way to you again. “Nothing, but my parent will be able to sniff out a liar, and I don’t want to take my chances with someone who can’t even tell people what she does for a living.” He sits next to you and places his wine on a coster.

You nod in understanding, this must be really important to him, especially since he’s being so picky. “I have an idea!” You turn to him and he gives you his full attention. “How about we pick a couple of girls, and then you can try going on a date with them. Just to see how they can act in person” he looks at you. It almost looks as if he’s examining your features but you shrug it of. “Please? Come on, this is the best way to find out how they can talk with your parents!” You fold your hands together and give him your best puppy eyes. You can’t help but love playing match maker, even if somewhere deep down you feel an unsettling gush of sadness. You push it aside.

He continues to look at you for another moment. And you swear you saw his eyes flicker to your lips once or twice. “Fine. I’ll do it- if your there with me” he leans back at takes his phone out. “What? Why? It would really be considered a date if I’m there” he looks up from his phone to glance at you. “It’s not supposed to be a date, it’s supposed to be an interview” you deadpan at him. “You really are ridiculous” you then pull your phone back up to look through more profiles with him.

•••

It’s currently [1:47] in the morning and you and jeno had ended up in the same position you started in. Except this time you cuddle closer into him and he pulls you as close as possible; complaining that “it’s cold”.

“Ok here, we can add this one too. It says [hi, I’m Hyebin! I work as an interior designer, I love bike rides and jogging. My favorite season is autumn, I also love watching anime and cars, I have a terrible sense of direction and I’m allergic to ca….ts]” your voice was sleepily and almost at a hum. It was music to jeno’s ears. Your head pressed to his chest and your hair smells like rain wood, probably your shampoo.

“What! No, how can you be allergic to cats?”

You laugh at his reaction. “Jen… your allergic to cat, besides, Shes never going to meet your cats, it’ll be fine- you two have everything else in common. I’m adding her” you add the profile and shoot her a text about meeting up tomorrow afternoon for an ‘date’. He didn’t like that you kept calling it that, but he wouldn’t say anything. It began to get quiet. The faint sound of rain hitting the glass. The dimly lit room and the air conditioning was blasting for some reason. The mood felt so cozy and his heart began to race- along with yours.

When you send the text you put your phone down and wiggle to get comfortable under the Blanket he has you two wrapped up in. “You tired?” He asks warping an arm around your frame. “Mm no” you’re already dosing off and he chuckles lightly. “All these girls seem perfect Jen.” You add.

He loved when you’d call him that. It felt so intimate to him. But it wasn’t, it was normal between best friends. Normal. Not weird.

“I don’t like her” he argues, closing his eyes. You can feel him trying to match his breathing with yours. You continue to lull yourself to sleep as jeno begins to rub your back. “She’s literally perfect for you” you whisper. You’re basically asleep now. You mouth open and your body limp, all you weight was on him and he loved it. He loved the feeling you you against him. He loved that fact that you feel safe enough to fall asleep in his arms.

He loved…

You.

“But she’s not you” he replied. He knew you couldn’t hear him, to far gone in sleep to register his words. But he felt a load of weight and worry leave his body when he voiced those words.

They aren’t you.

•••

[6:36pm] February 13th

The next day you met up with Jeno at modern cafe. When you walked through the door your eyes immediately find him. He’s dressed in a buttoned up shirt and slacks. It wasn’t unusual for him to dress like this, but you noticed his hair was given more attention then what your used to. You slide into the booth across from him.

Jeno looked up from his phone to see you smiling at him. Your cheek bones lift and your eyes squint. He can’t help but do the same. “You look nice” he compliments and you smile wider. “Me? Your the one you did your hair all.. fancy” you laugh when he reaches to touch the strains that fall in front if his face.

“Okay! So I’ll be at the table over there..” you begin. “So you know where I am if you need anything. Eunchan is the first to come, she should be here in like five minutes” you show him the texts between you and the other girl he couldn’t care less about. “No, no stay at the booth with me. This isn’t a date remember? It’s just an-“

“-Interview I know, but it’s between you and her. This has nothing to do with me”

It has EVERYTHING to do with you actually.

“I’ll leave…” he threatens, his arms crossing over his chest, and you can see his sleeve stretching to accommodate his arms. “You are such a child! Why can’t you have a 30 minute conversation alone with a women?”

You cross your arms to mimic him, but it only pushes your chest up. And he smirks at you. “If that women is you or my mom, yes. But other then that.. absolutely not” he shakes his head. You narrow your eyes at him, foot taping at the floor as you think. “Fine.” Your tone was sharp. And he can tell your getting frustrated.

How have you not put it together yet!?

[6:58pm]

You quickly slide out of the both and next to him. He watches you move and smiles and you slouch next to him. He absentmindedly leans into you. “You smell good”

It was a simple comment, but it had your heart skipping multiple beats. You clear your throat and sit up. “Thank you… your cologne smells good too…” you don’t look at him, but his eyes are on you. “Just my cologne? Not me?” He chuckles, but when he realizes your eyes are not on his, he followed your line of sight. you nudge him in the arm and squeal. “She’s here! Okay okay, relax!” You take two deep breaths as a beautiful women makes her way towards the table you and Jeno both sit up.

“Hi! You must be Y/n?” She sits down. Her hair was long and light, almost a orange colour, but it looked natural. She was gorgeous, her makeup simple and done to perfection. She sat with confidence and her earrings dangled when she moves her head, you admire her as she greets jeno, missing the words they exchange. She’s so beautiful, prettier then you; you thought. “Hi! Yes I’m y/n and this is Jeno” you gesture toward Gina ms he smiles to her. You can tell she finds him very attractive, and how could you blame her?

“So, I hear your looking for a “girlfriend” for a dinner with your parents?” She asks looking to Jeno. He looks at you then back to her. “Yes, I’m trying to find someone before tomorrow night”

“Valentines day?”

“Yes”

You watch them talk for a couple minutes. The feeling you had been stuffing down seemed to be overflowing.

She is literally perfect. They would look so perfect together. They might even end up getting together for real after the dinner. His parents would probably love her. And Jeno would probably come to you for advice with her all the time. And even if it killed you, you would give it to him because you love him. And if they ever got married- you would be there to cheer him on even if the sight of him placing a ring on another woman would literally kill you. Your best friend Jeno would always talk about how he found the ‘love of his life’ through fake dating. It would be a cute story to tell at parties or celebrations.

The thought of him spending his life with another women made the best of your neck hot. And your head hurt thinking about how he would be an Amazing dad…

Why do you even care!?

Why would him being with another person hurt YOU!? Your his best friend nothing more- But why do you wish it was you sitting across from him? Why do you wish it was you he wanted to bring to meet his parents? Or wishing you could be the one he would put a ring on?

Oh…

Oh

You’ve truly been avoiding it, because you didn’t want to face how he makes you feel… but here you are. Lost in thought- bathing in in your feelings. They’ve always been there, but now they are downing you.

You want him.

Like really want him.

Realizing that your not just attracted to him, but you can truly see a future with him.

Him.

Jeno.

Your best friend jeno…

You find yourself fidgeting with your rings while they talk, your brain feels foggy and you can’t bring yourself to look up. You tried to pay attention but your mind would just build with thought of them being together and you felt as if you would throw up.

But you have done it. You have realized that you love Jeno… now what? What do you do now? Say something? Confront him? Be honest?

“….Well this was fun anyway. I’m glad I had the chance to talk to you. And I wish you good luck with your parents” you lift your head to see the different, darker haired women make her way out of the cafe. You then turn to jeno, who’s looking at you. “What the hell happened I spaced out for two minutes!?”

Actually it’s been almost an hour; he thought,

Fifthy three minutes of you spacing out. Something was definitely wrong. he began to worry when he nudged your foot mid conversation, but you didn’t even flinch. Decided he should end it quickly with Hyebin, giving the second women a random excuse as to why she wouldn’t fit.

“She said she was a terrible lair, can’t have her revealing info, ya’know?” he shrugged and slouched down in his seat. “We should order food” he adds before you can scold him. Hoping food will fix whatever headspace your in right now.

You would never say this out loud, but your glad she’s gone. Her presence made you want to jump out if the nearest window and run home- never to be seen again. “Jeno…” he places down the menu to look at you. “Hm?” You finally turn to him. “Why are you being so difficult? Why won’t you pick a girl? It’s so simple, but you seem to care a lot about it” you ask genuinely. He thinks for a moment and you wait patiently.

“I don’t want just anyone meeting my parents. They mean a lot to me, and I don’t need a random women meeting them” he explains, while continuing to look through the menu. “Oh” you nod. Not wanting to ask him too many questions.

You can’t seem to focus on anything. Not when the only thing going through your mind is Jeno.

‘Jeno’

“Yes?” You turn to him when he responds to what you thought… were your thoughts.

What?

“What?”

“You said my name?” He leans in questionably, trying to find your eyes, but you refuse to look at him. “I did?” You turn away from him, grabbing a menu form the table to act like your looking for food.

“You did… are you feeling okay?” He continues to move his head in Front of yours; so you’ll look at him. When you finally do, your heart stops. He is so handsome so beautiful- no, breathtaking. His eyebrows pinch together, you can tell he’s worried. You don’t want him to be worried about you, not right now. “Yes I’m… No actually I’m not feeling well and I should probably get going. You seem to be doing well without me anyway” You place the menu down on the glossy wooden table in front of you and begin to get up.

You stop when Jeno’s hand wraps around you forearm. “Wait, do you want me to come with you? Is it your stomach? I can make you some ramen” He looks desperate and worried. So you put on your best ‘I’m fine’ face and tug your hand away. Your skin felt tingly where he had touched you, and the thought of him making physical contact with you again gave you butterflies. And you can’t think straight. “Nope, I’ll be fine. Your next runner up should be here in like 15 minutes? She’ll text you” his jaw tightened and his brows knitted.

“I don’t want to do this without you” he grabs at your wrist this time. The tension slowly raising with each respons.

What the heck is going on with you?

“Why? What changes whether I’m here or not?” You try to laugh but you can’t. So you just fake a smile. “Y/n please, don’t go. Your hiding something, I’m not stupid” his voice seemed more stern this time. “I’m fine. Text me after- and let me know how it goes” you smile once more before running of.

“Y/n-“

Jeno won’t chase you. He knows he can’t get you to stay and he wouldn’t want to force you, but it doesn’t stop him from trying to call out for you anyway.

[7:46pm]

•••

When you opened the door to your dorm your faced with your roommate Harim and her boyfriend jaemin. They were watching tv on the couch and you smiled to them before turning to your room.

“You okay y/n?”

Harim, is a nice roommate, really! But sometimes she can be a bit nosey. Not it a bad way, she just wants to know how I’m doing. She’s very empathic or whatever. So when she asked that question; you were scared to answer.

“I’m all good, just a little overwhelmed… need to be alone with my thoughts” you wave too her and jaemin. He gives you a look before smiling back. “Okay! If you need anything we are here”

…

You close the door to the bathroom and turn on the faucet. Then you lean against the counter to examine yourself in the mirror.

This is ridiculous…. Why is this such a big deal to you? The feelings have always been there… but now your freaking out like a child because you decided to address them!? You feel so stupid.

Telling him could possibly ruin Everything. That’s what everyone always says in movies… but now you truly understand the feeling.

‘Fuck this is so stupid.’ You thought.

…

When you finally leave your room, after what felt like hours of you contemplating on whether or not you should tell jeno the truth; you walk into an empty living room. Your roommate and Jaemin must have left. So you find yourself on the couch to relax and watch tv. Searching through shows that don’t involve the main character falling in love with her best friend. You end up watching some cheesy old chick flick that you’ve never seen before. You feel your phone buzz, the vibration affecting the rest of the couch. It was jeno, you pick up the phone and open the text.

You didn’t even realize how late it was again. [12:13] have you really been doing absolutely nothing for almost 6 hours!?

Man child

_____________________________________________

|| Man child -

Hey, interviews are over

|| Man child -

lm omw. I got takeout

- You ||

Alright!

_____________________________________________

You sit up and look around the living room. You’ve never cared wether or not it was clean before he came over before… so why now?

You spring to your feet and begin picking up plates and some cups to put them in the sink. Busying yourself with cleaning the dorm when you hear a pin being entered into your front door and the sound of the handle clicking. “Y/n?”

“In the kitchen!” You yell out to him while place the last cup on the drying rack. You can smell the food before you even see the bag. When jeno spears from behind the corner you shoot him a smile. He grins at you then places the food on the table. He’s wearing sweatpants and a hoodie now. But he looked just as good as he did at the cafe. “Are you feeling better?” He asks turning to you while leaning on the granite counter.

He’s hoping it’s not awkward after that weird conversation at the cafe. He had wondered what had gotten into you. To busy with that thought to care much about the girl across from him.

“Mhm much better” you examine every inch of him. His face, his hair, his hands. And he watches you space out. “So what got you feeling unwell?” He asks, pushing himself off the counter and slowly nearing towards you. “First, how did the interviews go?” You place the towel you were using to dry your hand in the counter

“No, Why did you leave me?” He insists and you give in. With a big sigh you ready yourself to tell him the truth… tell him what he wants to hear*

“Sorry, I was just feeling a little overstimulated, I’m not sure why” yes the hell you did. “But I just needed some time alone” you continue and he listens with a soft smile.

“Don’t apologize pretty... Did you figure out why you were feeling overwhelmed?” He asks, his hand coming to move hair from your face. The action wasn’t supposed to make you feel the way you did. This is normal between you two… not weird… you aren’t supposed to be this affected.

You are so beautiful; he thought. Your in comfortable clothes now, but he thinks you look ten times better then at the cafe. If he didn’t have half a mind, he would kiss you right now.

“Yeah” you unintentionally lean into his palm when he tucks the hair behind you ear. Your eyes close in the process and he freezes. You looked like a cat, feeding into his touch. He caressed your face while smiling down at you.

“Yeah? … What was it?” He ask, taking his chances and taking a step closer. Your thighs touching his, before he wraps his arms around you, bringing you into a warm hug; which you reciprocate.

“You…”

You didn’t mean to say it, but you didn’t really seem to care what left your mouth when he was holding you. You felt safe.

“Me!?” He tries to pull away but you refuse.

“Please don’t let go” you grip tighter around him. Digging your face into his chest. “I was overwhelming you!?” He asks. His hands stay open, no longer loading into you. Jeno just watches you closely, but you won’t move.

“No, I mean.. it wasn’t anything you did”

“What does that mean? Are you upset with me? Is that why you left?”

“No. Jeno please just hold me for a moment” you finally look up at him. Your eyes pleading him to hug you. How could he refuse. His big arms wrap around you, squeezing you into him further. You can hear his heart beating, faster then normal. He continues to look down at you. He watches you stare at him.

“Jeno?”

“Y/n”

“Can I be the one you bring to meet your parents?” He can’t help but beam at the question. He felt giddy and light. He doesn’t care about anything right now, the only thought in is head is you.

“Finally…” he muttered. You feel like his head is moving closer to yours, but maybe that’s just your mind laying tricks on you.

“Finally? What does that mean? Is that a yes or a no?” You punch your eyebrows together and try your best to keep eye contact with him. “You don’t get it do you?”

“Get what?” You are about to pull away to ask another question, but Jenos hands move from your back to your hips and you can feel your body heat up. “Y/n you are quite oblivious” his head is definitely moving closer to yours. His eyes are stationed on your lips and yours on his. “Jeno?” he getting unbelievably closer, you begin to hold your breath, grabbing his forearms for leverage. “Y/n”

“Are you going to kiss me?” You watch his face closely.

“As soon as you say the words princess”

You let out a sigh and lift your hands to hold his face. “‘The words’” you whisper and he didn’t even get the time to laugh, your lips attached to his immediately. One of his hands come to cup you face. His lips are soft and it feels like a movie. I know it’s sounds cheesy, but the moon was so bright through your windows and the sound of wind could be heard from inside the apartment.

[12:59]

He tries pull away but you won’t allow him. Your lips chase his and he smiles into you. “Y/n”

“Yes?” You look up at him when he pulls away completely. “Your going to be my valentine.” You laugh at his seriousness. “Is that a question?”

“No”

He leans in again to peck a your lips

“Please. Let. Me. Take. You. To. The. Bedroom.” He asks between each kiss. “I haven’t even said it yet jeno”

He pulls away. “Said what?”

“That I like you, and I think that there’s definitely something between us” you joke, bitting your lip, and being as dramatic as possible.

“Congrats… You were the last to realize” he laughs when your face drops.

“Wait- are you serious?” He lets another laugh leave him.

“Happy Valentine’s Day y/n”

[1:01am] February 14th

[141trash]

What's a girl gotta do to get more of that dad!Simon you've been hyperfixating on? 👀👀👀

Ooh bestie I'm SO glad you asked. I was going to post it anyways once I found a good spot to stop. But since you're here I'm ready to share. Thank you for the ask much appreciated

-Dad Simon whose at the toy store nervously trying to figure out what to buy his kid. The daughter he never knew he had until now. It's her fifth birthday and sure he'd had a little nephew before, but what do little girls like? -You at the same toy store to pick up a gift for your neighbor kid's 5th birthday. You see Simon, a big hulking man dithering among the brightly pink splashed aisles and offering to help, but he looks so desperately lost and out of his depth -Simon looking at you this tiny short af woman with bright curly red hair (you've got a Merida wig on, but he doesn't know that). You don't seem intimidated by him in the least when you offer to help and he really just wants to do right by his daughter so he sucks it up and agrees that yes he really needs help picking a gift for his daughter -He awkwardly explains that he's military and hadn't had any idea that he had a kid up until now, but he wants to get her something to make up for the fact that he's been gone.

You purse your lips in thought, "I don't know that there's anything that could make up for absence."

adding quickly when you see the way his expression falls a little, "But if you're not too sure what she likes yet and you still want to get her something maybe get her something that she can hold if she miss you. Like a soft toy and then add something of yours to it so that it's personal to you both. Extra tags if you have them or a shirt or something."

Your voice trails off for a moment and then it's like a light flips on. in your excitement you grab onto his forearm and had it not been for the sheer surprise of how pretty the expression is on your face, he would have flinched. He doesn't like people touching him.

"Do you have time?" You ask almost breathless in your giddiness.

He raised his brows wondering if he should feel apprehensive.

"Don't need to be there till the afternoon."

"Perfect! Let me buy this and I know the perfect place to go."

Somehow he finds himself following you to check out and then over to your car. As you walk you introduce yourself, and manage to extract, "Simon." from him as a response.

"It's a couple blocks down, at the mall. Do you want to follow me in your car or come with me?" you ask popping the trunk and dropping your purchase among the other bags inside.

Under normal circumstances he would say follow, but with the way you're buzzing with energy and just how unthreatening you seem, he agrees to go with you.

The regret is almost immediate when you turn on the engine and nearly burst his eardrums with how loud the music is blaring from the speakers. He flinches and lets out an expletive while you rush to turn the sound to a more palatable level and smile sheepishly at him.

"Sorry. It gets me sometimes too." you laugh at the incredulous look he's giving you, "I like to have a party to up my mood when I'm driving tired."

-You towing the hulking man through the cheery warm yellow entry of the build a bear and waving to a friend of yours whose at the counter. After showing him the basics you leave him to choose and go speak to your friend. -Finally after a while you find him staring at the little section of army uniforms frowning at the green camo uniform. it takes you a second to see that even though he clearly wants to choose it there's something bothering him about it. The American flag patch on the sleeve His accent was clearly English of some sort.

"Is the American flag the only reason you're hesitating?" You ask him quietly. His gaze moves to you when you speak and he nods.

Grinning you pull one off the hook by the cardboard hanger and dig through you purse to find your to go sewing kit. He starts to protest when you immediately go to work using your seam ripper to get rid of the patch.

"There." You proclaim.

"Yer gonna get in trouble." He grumbles, but seems thankful as you hand it to him to go with his other choices.

"It's fine. You're buying it and I know the people who work here. The girl at cash and I went to college together." You gesture over your shoulder at her and when he makes eye contact with her she gives a friendly wave.

-You don't even question when he ends up with a pochacho dog with the army uniform and surprisingly a helmet that has a skull and flames on it instead of the matching army cap. You also hadn't heard the message that was added, but knew he'd done it because he'd leaned down by the station and spoke in his low gruff voice.

Simon on the ride back to his car with the paper bag on his knees glancing at you humming happily and finally getting the courage to ask why you bothered to help him

You glance sideways at him and give a shrug.

"Some dads don't even try. Some kids don't have dads. You clearly want to try and make up for last time. Why wouldn't I want to help?"

He wonders if you had a shit dad too or if what you'd been buying a t the toy store was for your own kid and the father was a piece of shit. It wasn't his business though so he didn't ask. Luckily for him, he doesn't need to.

"Listen. It's not really my business and I don't want to overstep, but just don't make promises you can't keep okay? Since you're military you're probably going to be gone a lot. Kids aren't dumb. They understand a lot more than people give credit for. I think if you really want to have any sort of relationship with her and you don't want her to hate you then be as honest as you can. She deserves that yeah?" There's a slight tremble in your voice that tells him that it's personal.

"Yeah." He agrees and he means it.

When you make it back to his car he lingers trying to think of what he could say to thank you. Because more than anything his daughter meant hope. A tiny spark of hope that he could have a family even after everything that's happened, that he's done. And in his head you've just given him the best chance at not fucking it up. He almost wants to ask for your number.

But he doesn't. He just memorizes your smiling face as you wish him good luck with meeting his daughter before he ducks his head and shuts the passenger door, gripping the bag tightly. He watches your car disappear feeling oddly disappointed to be doing so.

Tiny info dump beneath the read more bc I felt the need to add it in haha :)

-Why are you wearing a Merida wig? In this reader/you are a cosplayer influencer, but also do Princess Cosplays for little kid birthdays on occasion. Your neighbor's kid is suuuch a sweetheart that you absolutely want to do a cosplay for her birthday and were half getting ready before remembering the thing you wanted to get her for her birthday (honestly I really just wanted the moment where you and Simon are talking and where he sees you in the full cosplay and of all the things he could say to you he has to tell you that your scottish accent sucks because ofc he works with Johnny so he knows what the accent should sound like. and i didn't even put that in this part orz)

-This is in my head set in the USA and his daughter is a product of a one night. He doesn't find out until after the mother dies and is contacted by the grandmother. Literally could write a whole ass one shot smut of this because i have thoughts SO MANY THOUGHTS

I made a quick image of the build a bear he chose :) because I spent hours thinking about it and it needed to see the light of day. if i wasn't on a spending ban my delulu ass probably would have considered making a physical one because think of all the COD outfits I could sew for it

[medievalandfantasymelee]

THE HOT MEDIEVAL & FANTASY MEN MELEE

QUALIFYING ROUND: 113th Tilt

Hugh Beringar, Cadfael (1994-1998) VS. Prince John, The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938)

Propaganda

Hugh Beringar, Cadfael (1994-1998) Portrayed by: Sean Pertwee

“The One True Hugh! He deserves much support. I love Sean Pertwee's portrayal of the saturnine, intelligent Hugh, and the way he captures the character's warmth and humor and the frequency with which he is just Done. Also those cheekbones could cut glass, good LORD.”

Prince John, The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938) Portrayed by: Claude Rains

“He is extremely handsome and extremely suave and absolutely unprincipled. He's also very relaxed about it, which is sexy. His underlings are uptight; he's just having a great time being the smartest person in the room and using this power to Scheme™. His reaction to being publicly confronted by Robin Hood is to look him up and down (Errol Flynn in tights, so, fair) and say: "You're a saucy fellow. Robin, I like you!" Then he invites him to dinner. This is a BENCHMARK performance for insouciant, ruthless, well-dressed villainy, is what I'm saying. Claude Rains floated suavely so later generations of villains could walk, or something. TL;DR: I believe what the youths call it these days is serving cunt.”

Additional Propaganda Under the Cut

Additional Propaganda

For Hugh Beringar:

“Idk what Sean Pertwee had going on in 1994, but whatever it was, I am HERE for it. The way he turns the keen gaze of those piercing blue eyes on you, and stands there, arms folded, back arched, intimidating yet approachable. Mmm! What crimes must a girl commit to get My Lord the Sheriff’s Deputy to give her the third degree? He’s not only stern and intelligent but he’s also so noble, and chivalrous, and he got his position by killing his predecessor in trial by single combat as the only way to settle a charge of murder and also preserve the dignity of his lady love. He’s a KEEPER.”

[Photoset]

For Prince John:

“My favorite fact about this character is that Claude Rains saw this wig and immediately said I will play him as a gay man. I still wonder if Prince John wants to fuck Gisbourne or if he wants to fuck Robin. Or maybe both? Anyway he has great scenes with Basil Rathbone. Rody McDowall was sure Rains based his interpretation of Prince John on Bette Davies, and he didn't say no. Also please... 🥺 My tiny king Claude Rains never get to go to the second round of any poll ever. Please let him win a poll for once in his life 🥺 Prince John is such a fun villain he deserves it”

Look at him enjoying himself so much! Isn't he a perfect little bastard? <3

[Gifset]

[junipers-archive]

So I was watching the disney movie Atlantis; The lost empire and thought that spencer is kinda like him in an endearing way. Maybe you could write something where he dresses up as him for holloween and Reader as Kira? 🙏😇

You were on your way to Penelope's Halloween party. Or the "Spookiest Bash of the season" as she called it. It was her turn to host it this year, and she'd of course made it themed.

Only Disney movie characters. Being the scaredy-cat she was she refused Dereks plead to change it. And your boyfriend, the rule follower he is, was now beside you clad in the least amount of clothing you think you've seen him in, out in public anyway.

Solely dressed in a thin army-green tank top, lighter pants and a satchel to match. "You know Spence, you don't look too different from your usual get up. Don't get pouty when Derek says something!"

"I-I look different!" he was looking down at himself judgingly, "And if Derek says anything I'll just point to my matching partner, you are what completes my look."

As you approach the front door you giggle, he was right of course, with your white wig, bright blue crop top and bohemian styled skirt you definitely looked in costume. Once he rings the doorbell, Penelope answers immediately, Derek and Emily close behind her.

"You're here!" She goes into hug you and you can practically feel Derek's playful insult on the tip of his tongue.

Surprisingly though Emily beats him to it, "Spencer did you even dress up? Cause I don't think its fair I had to dress up as the girl with Stockholm syndrome that fell in love with a unhygenic hairy beast and you're not even dressed."

Derek turns to explain at your horrified expressions, "She's Belle from Beauty and the Beast."

"And what are you?" You roll your eyes at his outfit, he's only wearing a brown loincloth and Penelope evidently is loving it.

"He's Tarzan." Her eyes track him and up and down before letting you two in, turning her attention to Spencer. "And they're right. Who are you?"

He grins, his whole face lighting up at being questioned, putting his little round, very real glasses on the bridge of his nose as he pulls you into him. "Why I'm Milo! And this is my Kida."

Those words recieve a chuckle from all of them as you begin greeting everyone else there, and Spence, out of character or not, has a new fact to tell to anyone wondering about his costume.

"Did you know that Milo wasn't supposed to be visually impared? The origional story board he doesn't have glasses at all! The director made the decision to add them because..." You swear every one knows more about the movie every time they speak to him that night.

And when it comes to picking the movie? Well it isn't a surprise when Atlantis is everyone's first choice.

[stxrrynxghts]

Re-watching Mahabharat (5/?)

Karna's obsession with Arjun is VERY unsettling

Bhishma is straight up BLACKMAILING Dhritrashtra. I don't have any issues with it, NGL.

Duryodhan's expressions are so FUNNY like he looks stupid 90% of the time despite being gorgeous

"Bhairava ne bhairavi gaa li, mere bacche" LMFAO

Dhritrashtra loves Pandu and his sons, but not more than his own kids.

Drona is gatecrashing this event. YAY.

Technically Drona is right. The Kurus are still his students.

Arjun crying in court T_T

see guys? This is WHY Arjun is the model student. HE is the one student who is so devoted to his guru, hence why he is Drona's fav as well.

Drona knew that Arjun would stop him, didn't he?

Drupad is SO creepy, ngl

Okay but why does Karna dislike Arjun and the Pandavas so much? He has known them for like...a day?

Karna be like: I am offended on your behalf, mitra

The mitrata between Karna and Duryodhan.....makes me think that they were room mates ;)

Not Arjun making a fool out of Subhadra

also their tune is so soft to listen to.

No Arjun, jumping isn't called "dancing".

Did I just see Arjun and Subhadra play the Dwapar version of hopscotch-

Srsly? Subhadra doesn't know what the chakravyuha looks like?!

Not Subhadra dropping dialogues said by Krishna to confuse Arjun

Arjun is not impressed by Krishna

Arjun is a huge simpleton. Dude can't even see that he is being flirted with.

did.....did he just flirt back? Is the world ENDING?!

Drona is not allowing Karna to fight in this thing. He isn't wrong, since as per the show, Karna is NOT Drona's student!

Also why is Karna being so salty about this, as if he didn't expect this

Okay, in canon, Shikhandi was born as a girl, but later in life, she transformed into a man, completely. He even married a woman, and had kids. why is he a girl here

why do the Pandavas always let Duryodhan boss over them

The Kauravas think they can break into the chakravyuha. How hilarious.

this. this is the result of overconfidence.

"Is vyuh rachna ko todna to mai bhi nahi jaanta" You should have thought this before entering, Duryodhan.

Le Duryodhan: pran jaaye, but hair flip na jaaye

Shikhandi is so incompetent for someone who aspires to defeat Bhishma.

TIME FOR ARJUN TO KICK SOME ASS

Seeing the chakravyuha transports me to more traumatic times

Yudhishthira, Bhima, Arjun, Sahadeva: i fight with my weapon, Le Nakul: i talk in horse language

not Bhima thinking about in the midst of a fight o_O

The Pandavas are taking this VERY lightly

I mean, so would i, if Arjun and Bhima were my brothers

Yudhishthira has the "tumhara kuch nahi ho sakta" expression on his face

Sahadeva's wig is so BAD

Arjun is serving hair goals even in the midst of a war. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that his hair is all natural, and not a wig.

Arjun, this isn't hurdles. why are you jumping?

Arjun, sweetie, be careful, or else your dhoti might get untied somehow.

Drona and Drupad's history....is interesting.

Drupad is a sexist person, and an even shittier dad.

Dhritarashtra tried to manipulate Yudhishthira, but ended up getting manipulated by Arjun instead LOL

Gandhari isn't even hiding her displeasure. sis.

Duryodhan has the funniest smile, it sends me cracking everytime he smiles. like, it is very clear that his intentions aren't pure, but this is Yudhishthira he is lying to.

Not the Pandavas doing different things in the same room XDDD

Nakul and Bhima are clearly each other's favorites. This is so sweet.

Bhima almost moaned after tasting sugar syrup. I could see that on his face.

Why...why on earth is Bhima eating a RAW Karela?!

Bhima literally conducted a science experiment to show that Duryodhan will remain to be an asshole. Perhaps making slits in the karela would have helped reduce it's bitter taste?

Yudhishthira is telling his bros to look at Duryodhan's positives. No Yudhishthira, you are the stupid one here.

[bisexualfemalemess]

BRIDGERTON SEASON THREE PART TWO SPOILERS

I’m actually not ready for this because it’s the last episode of the season and still so angsty but of course it has to be.

Already can’t do this. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE OPENING SHOT IS COLIN BROODING ON THE SOFA WHILE DRINKING HIS TEA FUCK OFF???? 😭😭😭 Communicate please??? Or at least look at her, colin. I actually can’t handle this. WORST MINUTE OF MY FUCKING LIFE, NOW HE’S FUCKING OFF TO BRIDGERTON HOUSE BECAUSE HE WISHES TO LEAVE????? MAKE UP OR I WILL KILL MYSELF!!!

Fuck off, cressida, not her knowing about lw and black-mailing her??? So much for her redemption arc. Not her telling portia??? Like that’s not your place???? Someone needs to give our baby a break. Aww, portia’s character arc is actually so important to me like not her thinking penelope just always left because her social battery died and she just let her be, that’s actually so cute. I swear if portia turns on her now too i’ll kill myself again, at least we got peneloise back though so maybe i won’t actually. WHY ARE PEOPLE SO PETTY TOWARDS HER ONCE THEY FIND OUT ABOUT WHISTLEDOWN??? LIKE THAT IS STILL THE SAME GIRL YOU KNEW MINUTES BEFOREHAND YOU JUST KNOW MORE ABOUT HER NOW???? At least penelope immediately tells colin this time so he cannot be petty about it.

DOES DANBURY KNOW??? Is this how we get agatha x penelope friendship next season??? Agatha bridgerton coming home????

Ooh a finch x dankworth ball??? Interesting. Oh? Francesca and john moving to scotland?

STOP BROODING COLIN AND TALK TO YOUR WIFE JFC! I love how eloise isn’t choosing sides, our baby girl has truly grown. AH! ELOISE SO TRUE “do not let your marriage be the scar.” Queen behavior, peneloise and polin soulmate-ism. Aww Poor baby pen sounds so tired of all the shit that’s happening to her. I love how they’re trying to figure out how to get penelope out of this situation and i love how colin ‘my wife’ bridgerton made an appearance even though he’s angry with her, 🗣️ He will not stand for anyone blackmailing his wife 🗣️ they’re all so shocked that baby girl’s filthy rich. ALSO LET HER FUCKING SPEAK. this is her mess, she was not looking for help just support and all of a sudden her opinions don’t matter anymore :( Y’all need to let go of your anger towards lw and try to support pen instead of trying to fight her battles for her. She’s just standing in the corner watching as they’re talking about her and what to do :( at least involve her, don’t ignore her and cut her off. Jesusss.

And Benedict’s having a threesome again, interesting but unnecessary.

Protective Colin bridgerton but he’s still angry with her :( “to hear word from home. From penelope, in fact.” STFUUUU STFUUU STFUUU JUST MAKE UP ALREADY WE DON’T NEED ALL THIS YEARNING AND ANGST AND PINING WE GOT ENOUGH OF IT IN PART ONE :((( Aside from that I’m actually so fucking happy that he essentially just called penelope his home, I’m actually gonna combust. I hate how he’s still trying to separate penelope from whistledown “penelope’s no villain” and then he goes on to say that he gets her hate for whistledown???? Did we not just learn that they were the same person, colin? CRESSIDA I STILL FEEL INDIFFERENT TOWARDS YOU BUT BLESS YOU FOR CLOCKING HIS TEA!!!!! “You do not sound as if you hate whistledown. You sound as if you are jealous of her.” PREACH IT! He shut that shit down to fast, like the moment he’s gonna admit that to himself he’s gonna be able to forgive her. THAT FUCK ASS WIG I HATE IT SO MUCH. PLEASE THE RESHOOT WIG MAKES HIM LOOK LIKE A KEN DOLL LIKE ITS SO PLASTIC 😭😭😭😭

PENELOISE SCENE I LOVE THAT THEY’RE BACK. “tell me what you are reading?”With eloise grabbing her hand? 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 WAR IS SO TRULY OVER. Colin literally fucked up so bad, not cressida asking for double 🙄🙄🙄 Also penelope’s dress in this scene is so gorgeous. Aww, he’s willing to lie to Benedict for his wife so that the cressida drama can stop. PLEASE JUST MAKE UP YOU IDIOTS. Awwww eloise grabbing her hand in support. I just know peneloise and polin will mirror the christina x meredith x derek dynamic from grey’s with Eloise just bursting into their home unannounced and colin will understand but still be so tired of it.

STOP CUTTING TO BENEDICT THREESOMES THEY HAVE NOTHING TO ADD TO THE STORY IN THIS EPISODE 😭😭😭😭😭

Honestly the lady danbury and violet friendship is so special to me like violet did not care that she was running around with her dad and Agatha loves her more than her brother, that’s so cute.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW THE POLIN SCENE LIKE HE WANTED HER AND HE LOVES HER BUT HE CANT BE WITH HER UNTIL EVERYTHINGS FULLY OKAY BETWEEN THEN BECAUSE HE’S A DEMI SEXUAL KING. THEY NEED TO MAKE UP SO BAD SO THAT THEY CAN MAKE UP FOR THEIR WEDDING NIGHT.

STOP IT HE LOOKS SO DISTRAUGHT SLEEPING ON THE COUCH AND PENELOPE FIDDLING AROUND WITH HER BRACELET AS SHE SAYS SHES GONNA SPARE HIM THE CONFIDES OF A SHARED CARRIAGE ACTUALLY SHUT UO THE ANGST IS TOO MUCH :(

AWW PENELOPE’S LETTERS MADE A COMEBACK. THE FACT THAT HE KEPT ALL OF HER LETTERS WHERE IS MY COLIN BRIDGERTON????

PENELOPE MY QUEEN GETTING TO SEE SOME OF HER MOMS WORST SIDES AND POPPING OFF ON HER. Mother-daughter bitch off! “Oh and from whom?” Well, her family actually. Portia crediting penelope and apologizing for overlooking her, the development is so cute. “We must do better.” So true actually and the fact that it’s coming from portia just shows her development.

Francesca’s wedding was actually so beautiful and her heart to heart with violet beforehand was so cute. Polin sharing a look during francesca’s and john’s wedding and penelope subtly touching him with her shoulder, i’m gonna throw up. STOP THE ANGST.

the bridgerton siblings being chaotic and teasing each other is something so dear to my heart actually.

Penelope’s outfits this episode are all actually so gorgeous, she looks so ethereal in this season in general but especially in this episode. No not her seeing a genuine smile on colin’s face during their wedding party and her smile slowly fading. The angst is angsting.

Aww penelope loves his family so much. The study scene is actually so… “then how am i meant to help you?” “By loving me!” Pop off, pen. Might need to bash his head into a wall a couple times though because our baby boy is very stubborn right now. Like it’s so special to me, her speech is sooo dear to my heart. HANDS, HANDS, HANDS! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Oh? Penelope writing to the queen AND Violet? What is going to happen?

Lmaooo Benedict got one taste of men and he could not stop. I’m actually crying, my favorite pansexual, (i love you but please stop taking screen-time from polin during their own damn season the irony of people complaining polin got too much screen time last season and now during their own season they barely get as much scenes as the previous leads) IM CRYING BENEDICT DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THAT WOMAN LMAOOO.

Aww a benedict and eloise swing scene, so on brand. Real el back not giving a fuck about fitting in anymore because she got pen back. ELOISE IS A LESBIAN I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH AND I WISH BENEDICT SHARED WHAT HE FOUND OUT WITH ELOISE SO THAT SHE WOULD KNOW THAT IT’S OKAY 😭😭😭

Penelope’s ball dress looks so gorgeous. AWW SHE PAID FOR THE BALL 😭😭😭😭 SHE’S SUCH AN AMAZING SISTER DESPITE ALL THE SHIT THEY’VE SAID AND DONE TO HER OVER THE YEARS. Not my poor baby standing on the sidelines again 😭😭😭 Where’s colin when you need him???

Oh, the queen showed up. SHE’S PISSED???? PENELOPE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE??? AWWW. Penelope revealing herself to the ton, girl boss. Her entire speech is her admitting her flaws and defending herself in the same breath. She’s one of the best, if not, the best written character on the show and it is about time the haters realize that. The fact that she keeps eye contact with El and Colin while defending herself but also assuring them about their own insecurities while doing so 😭😭😭 I’m crying, Colin actually smiled at her, he looks so proud of his wife 😭😭😭 Stfuuuu. Are we getting that make-up? PENELOPE MY QUEEN INTO THE LIGHT INDEED! AWW THE QUEEN ACTUALLY PARDONED HER OH MY GOD.

The ton needs to stop whispering if you have anything to say, say it to her face, The Featheringtons showing support and phillipa demanding that varley releases the bugs to save her sister from embarrassment 😭😭😭

Colin i’m so serious when i say go to your wife and ask her to dance. AWW THE DANBURY-PENELOPE SCENE. I have hopes for a friendship in season 4. She knew all along and kept the secret 🥹🥹🥹 “who loves the Bridgertons more than I” Especially her soulmates colin and eloise 🥺🥺🥺🥺 Aww penelope and her mother are actually so important to me “my girl” OH MY GOD THAT SCENE FROM THE TRAILER WHERE SHE LOOKS SO FONDLY AT SOMEONE AND THEN TURNS TO SEE COLIN WAS WITH PORTIA. SHUT UP THATS SO CUTE.

She looks so worried, please make-up i swear to god. “That i would not object to an annulment if you requested one.” COLIN WE HAVE 14 MINUTES LEFT IF YOU DO NOT SHUT THAT SHIT DOWN AFTER EVERYTHING SHE’S DONE TO SHOW YOU SHE CARES I AM PERSONALLY GONNA BASH YOUR HEAD INTO A WALL REPEATEDLY.

Oh never mind, the shock on his face, like that was never even a thought to him. He was always gonna stay married to her. FINALLY “you are her.” It took him a while to get there but he finally accepted that part of her and it’s so cute. His speech is actually so…he’s such a healthy male character, the only man ever actually, like you will not be able to find a man that is so in touch with their feelings that he can admit he was jealous and that you’re actually a braver, better person than he is. COLIN BRIDGERTON THE MAN THAT YOU ARE🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ this speech is so dear to me.

STFUU THE PARALLEL TO EPISODE ONE

Episode 1: “Goodbye, Mr.Bridgerton”

“Pen, i….”

Episode 8:

“You are a very good man, mr. Bridgerton.”

“Now, will you please do me the honor of joining me on the dance floor, Mrs. Bridgerton.”

STFUUU HE ACTUALLY CALLED HER MRS BRIDGERTON THAT IS A WIN FOR ME. Them dancing together will always have a special place in my heart, especially since everything’s resolved and they’re all giggly.

Oh, Eloise moving to scotland with francesca, oh my god. OH??? Francesca bridgerton, i know what you are and Michaela stirling i did not realize your game. Welcome to the sapphic club, fran.

OH????? Penelope riding colin!!!! Yay! I wish they kept in the longer version of the scene since this was apparently originally part of a montage but i’m so glad they finally got their shit together and consummated their marriage. Penelope loves colin’s chest hair so much.

OOOOH? Masquerade ball. Ben’s season next?

Pen’s and eloise goodbye hug was so long actually, they’re the cutest. Penelope’s little wave to her, my peneloise heart 🥹🥹🥹

“Goodbye.” SHUT UP

Oh my gosh, the epilogue. Polin had the heir so fucking cute. THEIR MARITAL BLISS IN THE EPILOGUE THEY’RE SO SICKENING ACTUALLY. Aww phillipa wants her daughter to be a writer so cute. POLIN WRITER COUPLE AND PENELOPE SUPPORTING HER HUSBAND IN WRITING AND PUBLISHING SO TRUE . NO STOP THE TRANSITION FROM JULIE ANDREWS TO PENELOPE’S VOICE WAS ACTUALLY GENIUS I’M GONNA THROW UP.

ALSO THE SYMBOLISM OF PENELOPE AND COLIN HAVING THEIR FINAL KISS BASKED IN SUNLIGHT IN FRONT OF THE WINDOW WHERE SHE USED TO SPENT HOURS TRYING TO SPY INTO HIS ROOM IM GONNA CHAIN MYSELF TO A TRAIN TRACK ACTUALLY.

Yours truly, Penelope Bridgerton

That’s it, i’m checking myself into a mental hospital now. What the actual fuck.

Wow. Awww guys all i want is playing during the credits that’s so cute 🥰

I actually don’t know what to do with myself for another two years until we learn what these characters are up to again. Like this season was actually so special to me i am dying for more especially more polin since they cut that short for some benedict awakenings and setting up for his season but i am glad for the bits that we did get.

Overall i do not have too much criticism for this season so i give it a solid 9.5/10

[cibeeorsomeshit]

Stolitz Week 2024

Day Four: Human Disguise/Blending Family (ao3)

Running into your sort-of date’s daughter in the human world while wearing a dress and wig probably didn’t help her opinion of you.

“What are you doing here?”

Blitzø was just about to snap at this girl to fuck off, but the slightly hooked nose, the softer but still inhuman glow to her eyes cut his aggression off, so instead he stammered: “Octavia?”

Octavia looked so unimpressed with him that Blitzø felt like he was getting bullied by the tilt of her mouth alone, even though he was more than ten years her senior. Maybe it was the Goetia pride that oozed off her naturally, or — more likely — it was because she was Stolas’ daughter and he was always a little afraid of that.

“Unnnnnf.” Blitzø was suddenly very conscious of the fact that he was by all means, dressed as a slutty college sorority girl (with clothes he stole from Moxxie’s wardrobe). Not that he was self-conscious about being in makeup and a dress. Hell-knows he did that enough when clubbing, but it was not really something he wanted Octavia to see when her opinion of him was already lower than the last ring of hell. 

She was still waiting. Blitzø belatedly remembered he was asked a question. 

“I’m looking for a gift. For Loona. For her two-year sobriety anniversary. She probably doesn’t even remember it but I do and I heard about this species of spider that sounded interesting from…” — your dad— “...sooo, that’s what I’m doing. Here. In a dress.”

Octavia looked down at his clothes like she was only just noticing it, and her frown somehow managed to deepen. Blitzø felt his nervous smile wobble. Sweat collected in his ass crack. Why didn’t he just wear a thong like a true sorority slut?

“No luck so far.” Blitzø tried to fill the uncomfortable lack of response with some uncomfortable response. 

“I can see that,” Octavia said. “Did the spiders do that to you?”

By “that,” Blitzø assumed she meant the torn and smudged clothes and the scratches all over him. “Oh, pfft, no. I accidentally stepped on a snake and it bit me. The venom got me so high I fell into a bush.”

Silence.

“Okay, there were several bushes. On the way down a cliff.”

“Uh-huh.” 

They stood, staring just past each other’s shoulder for a few moments, before Blitzø rubbed his arm and said, unnaturally civil and lacking in lewd vocabulary, “Well. I’ll leave you to your…thing. And I’m just gonna…yeah.”

Blitzø scampered off. When he thought he had a good distance between them he stopped and put his face in his hands. Fuuuuuuck….

Wallowing in mortification was familiar to him but this was a whole new kind of pit, since he had been trying so hard to get Octavia to hate him less so Stolas wouldn’t be put in a tough position. The last few attempts (when they ran into each other in the palace) had been icy ( Octavia) and awkward (Blitzø) and Stolas looked as though he would burst into tears on the spot when Octavia would just walk away without saying anything to either of them. Blitzø always left very soon after each encounter, and his self-hatred was only soothed a little when Stolas would ask him to stay, to just let him talk to Via first. He never stayed. 

Yeah, so, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

“You said it was for Loona?” A voice suddenly popped up behind him.

“HOLY FUCK!”

“Wow. I thought you were supposed to be an assassin.” Octavia looked up at the low branch where Blitzø had decided to take refuge. 

“And I thought you were,” Blitzø dropped down before her, patting himself to conceal his blundering response to a teenage girl sneaking up to him. “Somewhere else.” 

“I want to help you find the spider.” Octavia said. 

“...Really?”

“My dad sent me to practice collecting plant samples, so I’ll probably come across them at some point anyway.”

“Oh, uh. That’s good. Thanks.” Then because Blitzø was so astonished and confused, he added another “Thank you?” with the question mark loud and clear.

She didn’t look at Blitzø, started in a direction seemingly at random. “It’s whatever.”

They walked in tense silence for a few minutes before it became too much for Blitzø.

“Your dad kept nagging me about coming up there without at least attempting to pass as a human.”

“And why did you pick,” Octavia made a vague gesture with her hand. “That?”

“It’s easier to get away with things as a girl.” Blitzø paused and took a chance, blinking up at Octavia dramatically and hoping her sense of humor was somewhat similar to her father. “And looking cute is just a bonus.”

Nothing. Blitzø considered pitching himself off the nearest cliff. 

“Pfft,” came the tiniest, most understated snort. Blitzø’s dramatic puppy eyes suddenly became very genuine and very watery. Octavia turned the snort into a cough.

“I only laughed because that was ridiculous.”

“Hey,” Blitzø replied easily. “That’s what clowns are for.”

After that the quiet air between them was less one that made Blitzø regret not becoming a relatively respectable citizen of hell and more one that had him checking Octavia’s expression every so often to make sure he wasn’t irritating her with his proximity alone. So far so good. Maybe.

Octavia was quick at locating the spiders’ whereabouts, though left the catching to Blitzø, watching silently as Blitzø darted around trees, plucking them up from their webs. 

“Never thought of you as particularly athletic,” she said when he landed neatly next to her, jar full of crawling spiders. “I always assumed you just used guns for your work.”

“I do love a good bullet through the head,” Blitzø grinned. “But I was raised in a circus and it’s all muscle memory,  like learning how to ride a —” Blitzø cut himself off before accidentally making things very, very weird.

“A bike?” 

“Eh, close enough.”

Thankfully, Octavia’s attention was elsewhere. “Dad loves the circus.”

“Yeah. That’s where we met.”

The shock must have been truly intense because for a second her human face morphed back into a demon before pulling itself together again. “What? I thought you guys met when—”

The unspoken “When you fucked my dad and ended my parents’ marriage” hung very loud and charged at the end. Blitzø’s tail swished back and forth anxiously.

“We actually met when we were both kids. His dad brought him to my family’s circus for his birthday or some shit. Then my old man decided to sell me to spend a day with Stolas.”

“That’s…extremely troubling.”

“If it makes it any better, I don’t think your dad ever found out about that.”

Even more shock. “He doesn’t know?”

“I sure as hell aren’t going to tell him.” Blitzø pursed his lips, feeling somehow protective of Stolas in front of the man’s own daughter. “It doesn't matter anyway. I ended up having a great time. Stolas was really sweet.” It took him a second, then Blitzø started sputtering. “I mean he was fun! Not the, not the other thing. We had fun.”

In an uncharacteristically droll tone, Octavia teased, “Aw, did you have a crush on him?”

“What? No!” 

“You so did!” 

“I really, really didn’t.” That was true, but Blitzø suspected the way he was struggling to keep his blush down made it hard to believe. It didn’t help that now he had a big, fat, scary crush that was embarrassing for someone over the age of thirty to have. 

Octavia giggled. So really, Blitzø had no choice but to let her have this win. 

“Let’s go then.” She seemed to have a complete turn in her mood. 

“Go where?”

Octavia didn’t answer. Instead she flicked her fingers at him, and his torn and tattered clothes repaired themselves to better condition than they were in before. Blitzø couldn’t see, but he suspected his makeup was all pristine and way classier now as well. He guessed he shouldn’t be surprised that Stolas’ offspring learn spells of improving appearance before spells that mutilate your enemies. 

A portal opened up. “Where are we going?” Blitzø asked again. And again, Octavia didn’t answer. They stepped through, onto a very expensive and posh looking street in front of an equally posh hotel. Blitzø was about to be extremely childish and obnoxious to get an answer out of Octavia when a familiar voice interrupted him: “Via, darling! You finished your work so quickly! How wonderful — oh, who’s that with—”

Stolas’ rambling cut off when their eyes met. Blitzø didn’t think much of humans, so he thought it was unfair for Stolas to look so pretty as one, but Stolas burst into a full-blown blush at the sight of him first. 

“Blitzy!” Stolas’ red eyes were almost blending into his red face. “What are you doing here?”

“We ran into each other,” Octavia said. “Where’s Loona?”

“She’s at our usual table, dear.”

“Loona’s here?” Blitzø asked. 

“Why don’t you go and find her. I’ll go order you something. You must be starving.”

Octavia just hummed and shot Blitzø one last look. “The brunch here is great. You should try it.” And walk through the hotel entrance.

“Did she just invite me to stay and have brunch with you guys?” Blitzø asked dumbly.

“Blitzy.” Stolas didn’t answer his question as well — what the hell was wrong with this family? — but instead tugged him behind some ridiculous hedges that were shaped like people. “You cannot just show up with no warning—”

Blitzø shrank into himself. 

“ —looking so cute. It’s too much for me. I need at least a two-hour notice to prepare myself—”

Blitzø looked up at Stolas like he was crazy. “What the fuck are you yapping on about?”

Stolas bent down to look Blitzø in the eyes. “I am going to kiss you now.”

Blitzø was very confused, very hot, and very weak in the knees. “Okay.” 

It took them a solid twenty minutes before they made their way into the hotel restaurant, and also completely forgot to order anything. Luckily their daughters were smart and knew their dads too well. Stolas and Blitzø were greeted with a table full of food and pastries and strong smelling coffee, with seats readied for them by the side of their family.

(Day Three) ← →(Day Five&Six)

[smuts-whore]

Title- Pride

Jey Uso x Black Female Reader

Rating- 18+

Warning: Smut

Word count:1429

I just finished my promo so I'm sitting at my vanity bushing my hair. I hear a knock on my locker room door.

I say," Come in I guess."

When I looked up I saw Jey Uso standing at my door. Me and Jey had a complicated relationship. We fuck a lot, like every night but we're not together. I put my melt band on my wig and turned around waiting for him to say something.

"You did good tonight mama", he said grabbing my hand.

" I always do. Ya'll were okay", I said as I giggled as I saw his face drop.

He said," Damn just okay? Maybe because I wasn't the one talking."

"Well that can really be the problem because I don't like when your mouth is open. I'd rather it occupied", I said sucking on his finger.

"Girl you better stop playing while we at work", he said biting his lip.

I laughed and walked out my locker room and was met by my best friend Bianca Belair.

Her eyes grew as she saw Jey walking out of my locker room and then she grinned.

"Are you two together" she asked crossing her arms.

"No of course not", I said scoffing.

"Really that's how you feeling. Well have fun by yourself tonight", he said walking away.

"Why would you say that? That boy is crazy over you", Bianca said while hitting my arm.

"I know I just can't go there with him you know. I'd rather just have casual hookups", I said rubbing my finger through my hair.

"People who are sleeping together every night and can barely sleep without each other are not casual Y/N. Think about it", she said walking away to meet Montez.

~At the hotel~

I'm laying in bed twisting and turning. I can't sleep at all. I want Jey in my arms and not only that I'm so fucking horny. I decided to suck in my pride and text him.

Y/N~ Hi

Jey~ What

Y/N~ Can you come to my room?

Jey~ No

Y/N~ Please I want to talk

Jey~ Sorry not tonight

I threw my phone down while groaning. I do want to talk but I want to get some first and he knows that. You know what I'm going to beat him at his own game.

I got up and went to take a shower. When I got out I went in my bag and grabbed my red and black lingerie. Before putting it on I put on my Victoria Secret lotion all over my body. I took some coconut oil and rubbed it on my pussy.

I put on the set with some black heels. I went to the bathroom and took off my bonnet and fixed my hair and edges. I sprayed the matching perfume on me and sighed looking at myself in the mirror. Damn I'm fine. I grabbed my robe and put it over my outfit for me to walk to his room.

I grabbed my room key and headed to his room which was on the floor above me. When I arrived in front of his hotel room my body started to heat up with want. I knocked and he yelled out that he was coming. When he opened the door he rolled his eyes.

I stared at him biting my lip. He just got out of the shower because he had water dripping down his body and a towel wrapped around his body. His tattoo looked good wet.

"What do you want Y/N", he said knocking me out of my thoughts.

"Can I please come in", I asked and he moved aside so I can walk in.

I sat on his bed and was welcomed by the smell of cologne. I whined and he caught me but chose to ignore it.

"Why are you mad at me", I said looking up at him.

"The fact that you had to ask is pissing me off more. You play too much. One minute you want me and the next your telling people we're not together with an attitude towards it. Make up your fucking mind!"

I jumped at him raising his voice at me. He never does that. Even though I was shocked, I had to cross my legs at the heat that grew between my legs. I bit my lip and he watched my expression closely.

"I'm sorry daddy", I said with a smirk.

His eyes darken with lust at those words.

"I'll take my punishment like a good girl", I said opening up my robe leaning back so I was on display.

A slow "fucckkkk" left his lips and he sat down next to me.

"Strip and lay on your stomach now", he said getting up as I hurried and took off all my clothes and laid on my stomach and arch my back so my ass was in the air.

I felt a smack on my ass and I squealed.

"You always wanna disrespect me but I'll show you disrespect tonight", he rubbed his finger between my folds rubbing small circles on my clit. I whined as he removed his hand but gasped as I felt him push his entire dick in me.

"Fuck you so tight", he said groaning as he started to thrust in slowly. I moaned and pushed back on him. He held my hips to stop me from moving and I groaned.

"Faster daddy please", I said which he quickly did. He started pounding me at a god speed. I gripped the sheets and I squealed at how good it felt. My wetness

"YES DADDY. Don't stop, don't stop, please don't stop", I said as my toes curled.

He pulled me up and my back was against his chest. He nibbled on my ear and said,"Who the fuck said I was stopping."

He reached down and started rubbing my clit fast. I gripped his risk that was playing with my clit as my vision got blurry. He groaned and said "Damn mama" as I clenched my walls around me.

I said,"Please daddy can I cum."

He rubbed my clit faster and said,"Go ahead and cum around daddy you little slut."

That pushed me over the edge and I came saying,"THANK YOU DADDY."

As I came down from my high and he flipped me over and kept going. I grabbed the sheets trying to pull myself off him but he gripped my hips to keep me in place.

"No don't try to run. I take all your bullshit so you are gonna take this dick"he said going faster in my sensitive cunt.

"Daddy stop please", I said as I felt tears run down my face at the over stimulation I feel. My entire body felt like it was on fire. He reached under me and rubbed my clit. I could help the screams and tears that came out. I clenched around him and before I could stop it I squirted all over his cock and his lower stomach.

"Damn mama that was sexy. You think you can do it again".

I whined knowing I was about to have a hell of a ride.

Four orgasms later and him finishing on my stomach we we're finally done. He pulled out of me and i winced at sensitivity that I felt. He went in the restroom and came out with a white rag and cleaned me and him off. He pulled the covers over us and I laid in his chest as he wrapped his arms around me.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said it like that", I said looking up at him.

"Why do you play with my feelings Y/N. I have told you over and over how much I love you but you act like you feel the same", he said rubbing his finger through my hair.

"My pride. I really do love you it's just easier if I pretend I can be without you but I can't. Tonight alone in my room I thought I was gonna lose my mind the way I missed you. Your smell, your arms, your kiss, your penis", I said as we laughed at the last part.

"So you love me" he said smirking knowing he has me as his now.

"Shut up and go to sleep Jey", I said laughing.

He kissed me and then released my lips and kissed my forehead. He turned off the lamp on the nightstand and we cuddled up and went to sleep.

[saecoyle]

spoilers warnings // opinion abt the first part

what I like :

Penelope being an absolute sweetheart and terribly socially akward but not being turned ridiculed, like a lot of "not-like-other-girls" fiction. Penelope is different than the ton as she's not sticking out but she makes it clear that she is a very common girl in her wants and desire, that she is just more introverted and has had less help from her family.

Her relationship with her mom getting deeper as well as their conflict. Love that!

Francesca being a really agreable character and her silent affection towards John is adorable. Definitly looking for more of them in the second part.

I actually enjoy the subplot of both Eloïse and Cressida, the season is really centering on the cracks of the ton's idea of normalcy before going further than the Londonian society in others books which is a great thing. It adresses that in an universe like Bridgerton there's a difficulty for the young misses in market to bond and form friendship because they're in constant competition, but also it doesn't take away the flaws of each-characters, making them whole. The three girls does not only compete with themselves but they also envy each one thing for each-other and are blind to the other person's issue, but at the end of the day the ton ends up being an issue for all of them in one way or another.

Violette and Agatha's brother, very cute, love their different views on marriage and their equal love for their children.

Colin is actually not a non-playable-character! Still feels a lil bit uncomplete to me but hey, it's only four episodes, it might come as well. I do really empathize with him with his awkwardness in episode three and four and hope for more as for later. Also they need to get him a more fluffy wig in the sense that : episode 3 with the wind, thank you.

what I disliked :

The constant threesomes (okay, only two) but I don't like lesbianism being used as porn content for men, even though if it means what it means (Colin is not content with one sexual or romantic partner if it's not Pen ect ect…) as a lesbian it is still icky to me. (Also I know that the few mlm scenes we've had caters to 'everyone' because straight women tends to love gay men but they're also more deeper than sex workers having to shag in front of rich nobles.)

The part 2 teaser, in genereal the fact that L.W will be revealed in this season and that the main conflict will be Penelope lying to Colin. But it's mostly because I've read the books and I hold Penelope and her work's dear in my heart I have issues about how it was handled. Personal preferences I guess.

Benedict's plot, not interesting, love the actress (very pretty) but in general I feel like theyre running in circles with him to keep the hype until they've made all their seasons and then his. Just not interested in it.

THAT half moment in the carriage scene where Pen tries to put her hands in his hair but it feels very weird bc in the book I felt it as unconcious and passionate and his hair being so stiff + the weird look turned me off so bad…sorry I know a lot of people like that scene in its entirety but it's the only part I had issues with.

I'm sad that we don't get news on Queen Charlotte's family situation bc it really intrigued me, I'm not surprised that the universe feels kind of flat.

things I am neutral about :

Kanthony not being that present, well it's not their seasons! I always have issues with ennemies turned lovers in the sense that they become boring very fast if theyre straight ((sorry)) and I do like them so I'm glad I didn't have the time to get bored by them, it also means more Francesca plot, more Creloise so I am truly fine with it.

The Mondrich getting nobles traits, I just wished it focused on the son too. Maybe about how pressured he would be as a young guy, ect, but there's still time.

Oh and it took me a MOMENT to understand the logistic of him f*ngering her, at first I thought he was just pleasing her outside and I was like "but the logistic? does he just gets out of the carriage with wet fingers and goes tell his mom he's getting married?" But it seems that yes. So… Okay.

The pregnancy race, idk it just feels obvious that Pen at the end of the day might win bc one will have a girl or one will be too late ect… I do find the commentaries about sexuality funny, and if it means more Finch and Philippa I'm fine with it.

general opinion for now :

I have been warmed up to be hyped by the season for a while now so there is not a real surprise that i'm appreciating the main romance as they're the only one I read the book and had seen across fandom in laws. Now the four next episode can make it more than great or sadly make my appreciation downgrade, it'll be a different experience that I've had with the other seasons bc I binged all of it and only had a overall opinion on the entirety of the show. Looking for the rest!

[october-nightt]

spoiled (x black reader)

warnings: cussing, mentions of sex at the end, angst but then fluff, hatin' ass ex.

you and jack have been together for almost 6 months now, but it only took him 6 seconds to realize how high maintenance you were.

you loved designer brands and you always kept you hair and nails done so when it was time for you to walk down the red carpet with jack next to you, he knew you wanted to show off.

he was ready to announce yall's relationship and tonight was the big night.

"jack! I need help with my hair, I don't know what to choose" you whined.

jack leaned over your shoulder to look at the options you selected.

" baby you know I love you with your braids, or shit a 30 inch buss down would look good too" she smiled wide.

you frowned.

"fuck you know 'bout a 30 inch buss down?? that wasn't one of the options."

jack laughed and kissed you on your forehead.

"don't get fucked up jack" you said jokingly before booking an appointment to get the wig installed.

"you know I'm fucking with you baby, but it would look great. even tho yo natural hair is my favorite"

he said as he looked in the full body mirror sitting in the corner of the room you and jack shared.

after booking your appointment you slowly walked over to jack and put on your best begging face.

"you know what would go good with my hair?" you asked

"what?

'a new dress and nails, maybe some jewelry and shoes and new makeup!!"

jack turned to look at you.

" you was gon get that anyways mama" he responded.

you hugged him tightly and kissed his cheek.

"thank you baby"

after that yall finished getting ready in silence.

once you both were ready jack took you shopping. he wasn't worried about the price, he just wanted you to be happy.

but he also secretly wanted everyone to know how fucking fine his girl was.

you starting looking for shoes first, then your dress, and make up, and jewelry.

after shopping it was time for your appointment. jack didn't stay because he had to take care of something but you knew it would take a little while for your hair to get done so you didn't mind.

that was until his ex-girlfriend walked in.

she didn't see you at first but you damn sure seen her.

jack had told you stories about his ex. about how she only cared for herself and money.

you loved nice things but you weren't money hungry.

you decided to mind your business but she finally noticed you and had to start some bs.

" oh my god Y/N. you look beautiful" she leaned in for a hug but you moved away

"aww dont be like that, what? mad because jack was with me last night?"

you didn't believe her, you knew she would lie about anything to start some drama

"bitch please, my man left yo nasty ass long ago" you rolled your eyes.

you didn't have time for this hoe and her bullshit.

but then she pulled out her phone and showed you a picture of jack sitting at her house, and sure enough the time stamp proved it was from yesterday night.

you heart dropped

"just thought you should know" that bitch.. his ex said before walking away.

after your hair was done you immediately called jack

"hey baby, I'm right around the corner ill be there soo-"

"what the fuck were you doing with your ex last night?" you cut him off.

you heard his sigh

"y/n listen I was just over there because she needed me to help move her furniture into her new house"

you let out a spiteful laugh

"oh so when she calls, you go running huh? she's not your girlfriend jackman. I don't give a damn if she needed help she should've called someone else! and the fact that you answered when she calle-..."

you took a deep breath

"I don't wanna talk to you right now, ill find a ride. don't bother picking me up."

and with that you hung up. you felt like jack had you looking dumb. your own boyfriend was with his ex and now she's bragging in your face.

you called your best friend to pick you up and take you back to her house, you didn't wanna see jack.

you get ready at her house. even though you were mad at jack, you refused to let him show up to the red carpet alone.

you took an uber which arrived at the same time as jacks.

"Y/N?" he called out to you.

"can we talk?"

you simply nodded and you both walked somewhere more private.

"look I'm so sorry y/n. you're right, she's not my girlfriend and I shouldn't have picked up her call..shit I should've blocked her the day we got together but baby I cant be without you. she's blocked now and I know that doesn't mean much but I'm begging you to forgive me baby."

you looked up at jack.

"I forgive you jackman."

jack pulled you into a kiss and smiled as his arms wrap tightly around your waist

"now lets go mama, cus you look good as hell and once this is over I'm ripping that expensive ass dress off."

authors note: this is my firs time writing so please be nice! also feel free to leave suggestions on how I can write better or request for what I should write next. I'm not on here all day but I will eventually get back to yall. I will post everyone that I write for soon thank you so much for reading!! <3

[quietlyimplode]

the language of flowers and silent things

Whumptober 2023: Day 11 - Captivity

Warnings: canon type violence.

Word Count: 1.6k (gif not mine)

Summary: Natasha offers choices and chances.

A/N: reunion <3

Masterlist

Whumptober Masterlist

.

SINGAPORE

2014

Clint stares at her as she gets ready, smiling at her putting on make up.

“What?” she asks, “you’ve seen me do this a thousand times.”

“Nat, watching you put make up on in a bra, will always make me stop and stare at you,” he pauses.

“In a non creepy way.”

She smiles and continues to make up her face; the wig cap covering her hair.

“Are you sure, blue is the way to go?”

The wig both brown and blue is styled like Natasha’s hair when she was young.

She bites her lip.

“No. But maybe, if anything gets to her, maybe the past will.”

She stands and bends over, placing the wig on and adjusting it.

When she stands she looks like a different person.

“I never know how you do that,” he says in awe.

She sighs.

He kisses the top of her head, and hugs round her shoulders.

“We can do this another time, it doesn’t have to be now… this feels too dangerous.”

Natasha shakes her head.

“No, it has to be now,” she says, determined.

“Because who knows when we will get a chance again?”

She looks up at him and attempts a smile.

“Plus, I know you’ll be there, right?”

Clint nods, prepares his basic disguise of a hat and sunglasses and leaves her to finish getting ready.

.

Natasha feels eyes on her as soon as she enters the hotel.

They can’t know, not yet. She scans and looks for Yelena.

Seeing nothing, she continues into the bowels of the hotel, checking in and wheeling her suitcase to the elevator.

Natasha is hypervigilant.

Continuously scanning the environment, she focuses on getting to her room and closing the door.

She’d checked in as Melina Vostokoff, hoping to get Yelena’s attention, or at the very least, someone from the Red Room.

Taking a deep breath, she tries to calm her nerves. Waiting for it, for someone to come, felt almost torturous.

Isla was right.

Her words, as scathing as they were, were correct. She’d left.

Not just Yelena but the other widows. She hadn’t known what killing Dreykov would do, and selfishly; she didn’t care.

She just needed him dead.

Sitting on the edge of the bed she flops back.

Clint, perhaps, was also right, that she’d done the best she could in keeping herself safe, but it didn’t negate the fact that she didn’t look for Yelena.

There’s a small part of her that still thinks it’s not her problem, Yelena is not her sister, either were the widows.

They instilled every man (or woman) for themselves in training. Some girls took it seriously but most of them knew they’d only survive together.

Usually it was the widows with friends and guiding hands around them that survived.

Those that didn’t… well. They’re the ones they held funerals for.

She groans. The wig itching.

Natasha knows she needs to get up, set the trap within the trap.

She just knows it’s going to be a long, hard day.

But, she supposes, what’s another one.

.

It takes them to dinner to come for her.

The things they do are so predictable, that Natasha has to suppress a role of her eyes.

It’s amazing how things never change and the playbook they run hasn’t changed in years.

She told Clint they’d wait, scout and take her at night, and he’d scoffed.

Natasha feels them follow.

If the timing is right, and her guesses are correct, it will be Yelena and two others.

If Yelena is on point.. it’s all Natasha us counting on.

Clint can take out the other two.

With Yelena alone, she’s sure she can convince her to come.

Focussing, she moves quickly up the fire exit stairs, ascending them as quickly as she can, she hears the door close behind her, quick footsteps following after her.

She doubles her speed, listening for the door again.

When it doesn’t come, she knows Clint has likely taken out the other two.

Natasha feels the thrill of being chased, adrenaline pumping through her, as she continues up the stairs.

It better be Yelena.

Legs burning, she continues to the roof.

One flight to go, she calls out.

“Think you can get me?”

The footsteps behind her stop.

“Oh big sister,” the words come viciously, “you’re as good as got.”

.

Humidity hits Natasha as soon as she opens the door to the rooftop.

Singapore has a rainy season that brings a thick muggy quality to the world.

She catches her breath, and moves to the corner.

The trap set.

If Clint has the other two drugged, then maybe, this plan has a chance at working.

Yelena rushes the door.

Guns drawn they hold them high and face each other.

Postures identical, they circle each other, waiting for the other to speak.

Taking a step forward, Yelena takes a step back.

“Stop moving,” she growls.

Natasha takes another step.

Neither sure who has the upper hand, Yelena throws her gun.

The randomness of the action confuses Natasha and she’s not ready when Yelena rushes her, yelling and elbowing her in the face.

She rolls with it, circling and elbowing behind her.

It catches Yelena and pushes her back.

Natasha tries to sweep at her feet, then punches out, hitting Yelena as she moves back.

Yelena’s guard is strong, as she takes it, breaking it only for a moment to push then punch Natasha.

The fight gives Natasha enough time to wait to see if there’s any back up coming.

No one comes.

She turns and breaks the handle on the door, and then turns to Yelena.

“Just you and me, little one,” she smiles.

Yelena’s look is feral.

“How dare you,” she starts, and Natasha prepares for the onslaught.

The timing needs to be perfect.

She raises her knife and stabs it forward, hitting Yelena’s thigh.

It embeds in and Natasha thinks she’s done it.

Yelena sees red, wrenching the knife out and throwing it at Natasha.

She dodges it and pushes forward.

One punch blocked, two then.. she lets herself be hit.

Lets Yelena punch her, pummel her and hit her hard.

She feels the hate and anger behind each of the hits she takes.

Natasha growls, and throws her off as she gets messy in her anger.

“I failed you,” she says simply.

Yelena comes at her again, hitting her in the face as Natasha puts up no defence.

“I’m sorry,” she says.

Yelena places her in a hold and Natasha allows herself to be handcuffed to the nearby pole, pushed into a sitting position.

Fists clenched she sighs.

Easy to get out of, if she’s willing to rip skin and dislocate joints.

She doesn’t though.

Steadily she tries to breath through her mouth, her nose broken.

Yelena rounds on her.

“They’re going to come for you, and make you… make you like me,” she growls, “make you suffer every agony, every violation.”

The heat beats down as Yelena paces the rooftop.

“You’re a traitor.”

“You’re a traitor,” she breathes heavily.

Natasha gathers her breath.

“I’m not sorry for the choice I made,” she clarifies.

“I am sorry for not getting you sooner.”

Yelena spits.

“Choices? You had choices, what did we all have?”

Yelena continues to pace, looking to the door.

“When you made your choice, you condemned us all.”

Natasha compartmentalises her words, puts them aside, taking a deep breath.

“The decisions between bad choices is not better—“

“But you had them!” Yelena explodes.

“You had a choice.”

Natasha adjusts her position and sits on the ground.

“Not a good one,” she says, resigned. “A choice between dying and surviving.”

The next words are said with venom.

“What would you have done?”

She doesn’t mean for it to come out that way, but frustration and the need for this to go right, puts her on edge.

Yelena squats in front of her.

“I wouldn’t have left you there to die,” she says, as equally as venomously.

Natasha shrugs and looks away, “you would have.”

“Just like you’re going to do now.”

Yelena looks at her quizzically.

“You have a choice,” Natasha tells her, “to stay or go.”

“What do you—“

“The tracker in your thigh, the one they place so they always know,” she gestures to the stab wound.

“The knife, it’s disabled it. The current you felt, they can’t track you now.”

There’s horror in Yelena’s face as she feels her thigh, her hand coming away bloody.

Disbelief crosses her face.

“They’d have come by now, right? The other two to check?”

Natasha sees how much room she has in the cuffs. This was the plan, but she’s willing to try different ways that don’t involve her being vulnerable and being held captive.

“But they haven’t.”

She wriggles one hand.

“Now,” she pauses. “You have a choice.”

.

Clint finds Natasha handcuffed to a pole on the roof.

Alive.

“What happened?!” he asks, rushing towards her.

She doesn’t look too worse for wear, bruises on her face, broken nose and wig slightly askew; but alive nonetheless.

“She, uhhh, I stabbed her, she handcuffed me to a pole, we argued, and I gave her a choice.”

Natasha words come out in a huff as he releases the handcuffs.

“Where’s she go?” he asks, and they look out on the city.

“Did she go back?”

Natasha doesn’t answer.

“I don’t know,” she replies.

.

[fetus-cakes]

Furiosa: some jumbled thoughts

I genuinely think Mad Mad: Fury Road is one of the best modern movies ever. I rarely ever like prequels/sequels to beloved 80's franchises and yet Fury Road had me thinking and talking about the themes and storytelling for literal years after the movie was out. I even got the soundtrack and played it constantly while driving.

So! That means I had insanely high expectations for Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga. I don't think I was ever going to be 100% happy with any origin story for Furiosa, as nothing can really beat the limitless potential of an untold story. I still tried to go to the theatre with an open mind. Alas I was disappointed.

My verdict: Mediocre! much like when Nux ate shit right in front of his idol, this movie fails to stick the landing.

so my first complaint is: SHE HAD LONG HAIR WHAT IS UP WITH THAT SHIT

it's not just an aesthetic choice, in a world where a person fights all the time and she got to repair the engine while the truck is moving, long hair is a LIABILITY. it's going to get caught in a wheel and rip her WHOLE scalp offfffffff her whole scalp!

plus. it looked like a perfectly coiffed wig, which is so out of place in the WASTELAND. how does hair the wasteland look? it should be DIRTY and OILY, there's no fucking shampoo. instead her wig only got a little dusty at the end. here's my actual biggest complaint: it felt that they were contractually obligated to use the exact same sets, costumes and characters as Fury Road; we BARELY got introduced to any new people or places. EVERYONE looks the exact same as they do in Fury Road, which takes place NINETEEN YEARS after the events here

it's so so fucking boring that Immortan Joe, People Eater and Bullet Farmer look THE EXACT SAME as they do in Fury Road

in Fury Road there's the implication that Joe is slowly dying of various tumours and diseased flesh, but he used to be younger and healthier. we should have seen fit, strong Joe at his prime and maybe this was the START of his health problems; if this movie was any good we should have seen why he wears that teeth mask (it's to hide his possibly cancerous jaw)

People Eater has both syphilis and elephantiasis, both implied to be diseases he got from being a cannibal, but by the time you lose your nose and your leg looks so swollen those are later stages of those diseases, he's close to death in Fury Road. if he has no nose and a swollen leg at the start of Furiosa, that means he held on to life and sanity for nineteen years, which is very very unlikely Fury Road makes a BIG DEAL that Joe cares about his "wives". He treats them like property and obviously is a rapist piece of shit, but he does care a lot about what happens to them

you're telling me that Joe of all people wouldn't rip the entire citadel inside out looking for Furiosa went she went missing?

that he's so stupid he couldn't put two and two together that a little girl went missing from his harem and later a teenage girl appears "out of nowhere" among his warboys? and this teenage girl seems unusually healthy and capable, unlike most of the children of the wasteland? Furiosa SHOULD have been about her victimization at the hands of Joe and her many many attempts to escape, WHICH ARE MENTIONED IN FURY ROAD. instead we see her trying to run away once (1) and she never gets punished by Joe. her anger at him in Fury Road makes no sense now

I wouldn't say I want to see rape in a movie like this, but we got set up to think there's a lot more sexual violence in the wasteland. it's explicit in the Road Warrior, it's implicit in Fury Road

we got set up to think Furiosa was a "wife" or was at least the victim of Immortan Joe in a way like that we know for a fact that JOE has set up a system in which women, especially healthy women who can have children, are at a premium and he gets first dibs there's a very unsubtle gender divide in the Citadel that we know is Joe's doing because he's the one obsessed with having healthy babies and knowing this, they're expecting us to believe Furiosa was never the target of unwanted sexual attention? in this society that Joe specifically set up so women could be victimized? I have a hard time believing it

I really am not saying I want Furiosa to be the victim of sexual assault, but I do want them to give us a good reason why she is NOT when the previous movies have established this is a regular thing.

like we could have a scene where she escapes the harem very violently but gets caught, Joe might decide she's too much trouble to keep as a breeding stock but she's feisty and strong so he will give her a chance as a War Boy, and he gets to imply that he will force her to bear children if it she's not a good fighter what we get instead is that she dressed up as a boy (and somehow doesn't get caught for years despite her disguise being shit) and then gets taken up under the wing of Praetorian Jack and she doesn't disguise her gender anymore; and Joe doesn't care?? huh???

I WISH this movie was more about Immortan Joe establishing his own cult of personality that we see fully formed in Fury Road.

it would have been so good to see War Boys not quite as manically loyal to him until he comes up with the idea that HE is a god-king that will take the boys to paradise (Valhalla) 19 years is a good timeline to establish that sort of lore about himself. the fact that they ALREADY have it when Furiosa comes to the citadel is so SO boring

it's so boring that basically NOTHING changed in the citadel for 19 years, there was no power grabs or changes in hierarchy or changes to the lore that Joe has about himself everything was consistent and running smoothly for Joe for nearly twenty years? in a wasteland where resources are extremely scarce and people are CONSTANTLY murdering each other for water, gasoline and food? stability? in THIS economy?

it would have been more interesting if part of the movie was that someone else had the Citadel and then Joe came and took it and established his own society; and we see Furiosa trade one insane warlord for a different (perhaps worse) one literally one of the things that makes the Mad Max universe cool and fascinating is that the more fractured society gets, the more people in their own little pocket cities reinvent society with their own set of insane rules the only good thing about Thunderdome was the the fact that they had the Thunderdome to settle their disputes!

loyalty is a biiiiiiig theme in Fury Road, both in how Immortan Joe artificially enforces it with his cult of personality and how Furiosa and Max have the real thing for each through shared trauma it's so insane to me that loyalty from Furiosa to Joe is not addressed ONCE, it's something that he would demand from her he just accepts that she works for him? Joe is 1000% the sort of man who would force Furiosa to shoot her own friend to prove her loyalty to him, but we don't see anything like that

(this point is minor compared to the rest) I never understood chris hemsworth as Lord Dementus, like what the fuck is his deal he got better towards the end of the movie, but the first half he was so over the place was he gonna rape Furiosa's mom? no? why does he want to have the pretty girl-child so badly? is HE a pedophile? no? he likes children, but not in a creepy way? then why does he act so weird with her is he a capable war lord or just an idiot? hard to tell! why doesn't he sell Furiosa to Immortan Joe as soon as Joe expresses interest? slaves are a premium resource! if he really likes Furiosa, then why does he relent and give her to Joe when it's clear she's going to be breeding stock? it's like they saw Lord Humungus from Road Warrior and said "we want this character but without the S&M gay shit, oh oops but if he's interested in little girls that's bad in a different way"

we barely see Furiosa kill anyone in this movie, she doesn't even join in the WAR (the war that she SHOULD join to show her loyalty to Joe so he would trust her with the war rig!!) in Fury Road she is both ruthless and efficient killer. She's not cruel, but she has zero time to compassionate. someone explain to me how the hell she got to that point without murdering people up close and personal as a younger woman. in Fury Road she is NOT afraid to get into close quarters violence with Max, despite not having a gun and having the handicap of missing her arm (and not having her prosthetic one on). this tells us she's someone who KNOWS how to fight, someone who doesn't hesitate to kill

final thoughts: the music was so anemic, during one of the war rig fights I literally found myself thinking "where's the music? the music is supposed to get us pumped up for the action right now. I don't feel the adrenaline these characters feel!" did they record ANY new music for this movie? or was it all from the Fury Road soundtrack?

final final thought: Lord Dementus being used as living fertilizer for the peach tree is so stupid and impossible. It would have been better to shown him as a corpse, rather than someone who impossibly stayed alive for months or years for a sapling to grow. Did she implant the peach pit in his dick?

Showing clips from the original movie on a sequel should be cardinal sin in filmmaking. It's like they don't trust the audience to remember, or they're telling us "you liked this right? remember how much you liked this, you'll have positive associations with this current one!" do not remind me I could be watching a better movie instead of this

[hypocriticaltypwriter]

My Mary-Ace Merrill propaganda is working~💗💖💗💖

GOD PLEASE IF YOU EVER WANNA TALK MORE ABOUT THE GIRLIES BEING FRIENDS PLEAAAASE!! I love genderfluid Ace and it's something so strangely personal to me and so sweet and he's sooo fruity and I'm sure Nancy would adore her very strange, literal queer, of a boyfriend-girlfriend.🥺🥺

Ace: Shut up Nancy! Go water the garden with your cloudy eyes why don't you! Rain floods pouring in from NANCY!!"

Mary: Ohhh shh, shh!! It's Okey! I-i used to cry a lot to when I was little! I was real bad about biting my cheeks so I didn't make sounds...bleed right in my mouth! ....oh Nancy, Nancy, it's Okey dear, come on, shh...

Ace: ....Nancy, look...go...just...Nancy go away.

Mary: Oh Nancy, ma..maybe not today i-im sick with a cold- NO! ahah, n-no don't come over I don't need soup, spring floral cold is all...

Ace: here, don't, I repeat. Don't. You. Dare. Say a word miss water works, could power so much with your damn eyes...

Mary: ...Nancy? Can...here, for, being so...sweet and friendly to me all the time, you make me feel like a real girl! -o-oh you know, somtimes a girl just doesn't feel herself is all!!

Ace: fine you can come over but do NOT go into my bedroom, or the guest room, and if you do, ask me, and do NOT open the clothes hampers or my closet understand!?

Mary: Ace isn't home! Oh yeah, I take over the guest room! But he let's me keep stuff in his room too! Awwee he, he canceled date night? Ohh...oh- OH! i-i-i can call him! He didn't Janelle he just isn't here, oh i-im sorry I'm sure he forget, Ace is forgetful...why don't I take you out! I-im no, boy or Ace, but a girls dated i-i mean a a....well why not a show and soda?

Ace: .....Nancy, I....I'm gonna go out today, but... you can...wander around today if you'd like, the house, its...free now, do your girlie snooping.

Ace: .....Surprise?? ...i..got flowers incase you hate me- you don't? ....wlel kf xource I thought you'd hate me, I'm some queer fairy playing dress up! - YOU KNEW?! oh..date..night, y-yeah guess..and the fact you don't see us together, man your really smart remind me to never skip our anniversary or try and cheat on you💖💗💖 little miss garden detective...why that? Well...you cry and flowers need water, and flowers are jn gardens, and well...your like a detective with...connecting dots- it's bad I'm sorry...

Mary: ....morning pretty girl~ wanna go to the candy shop and swim later? Hmmm?? Yesss, this is the infamous routine I do as Mary~ yes of cource it's a wig I can't grow my hair out Nancy are you crazy!? ....now come on I need help with my zipper please.

YOU HAVE TO STOP ME!!!

I WILL DEADASS DO NOTHING TO STOP YOU KEEP IT COMIN

What if I just dreamt about them all night last night guys how deep am I in oh Lord-

All these scenarios made get on my floor in a fetal position crying HELPPPPP?? AUGHHH

Richard and Nancy would do anything for their gal in making her feel safe and happy- Nancy being sweet and hanging out with her and Eyeball literally ready to throw fists at any comment or catcall thrown Mary's way.

"remind me to never skip our anniversary or try and cheat on you💖💗💖" THE WAY I CACKLEDDD

The way Ace slowly starts letting his guard down around Nancy and getting more comfortable with her learning about when she's Mary just made me... JUST PLUCK AT MY HEARTSTRINGS LIKE A HARP WILL YOU 😫

Im not normal about this anymore and it's plaguing my mind 👁👁