#maybe my Russian cub scoring

[adamlarssin]

The only good thing to come out of this game is Marner and Matthews playing on the same line

[arplis]

Arplis - News: Friday, May 8, 2020 Stu Agler

"Brainstorming for New Periodicals" 17. Magazine for masseuses?: ROLF DIGEST.   GOLF DIGEST 21. Magazine for nurses?: IV GUIDE.   TV GUIDE 26. Magazine for golfers?: PAR AND DRIVER.   CAR AND DRIVER 44. Magazine for crossword constructors?: PUNNERS WORLD.   RUNNER'S WORLD 38. Magazine for beekeepers?: HONEY.   MONEY 51. Magazine for pharmacists?: MEDBOOK.   REDBOOK 60. Magazine for farmers?: HEN'S HEALTH.   MEN'S HEALTH We have another debut at the LA Times and Crossword Corner.  Welcome, Stu Agler ! Rolf Digest was the first themer to fill, but I had never heard of Rolfing.  Wikipedia tells me "Rolfing is a form of alternative medicine originally developed by Ida Rolf as Structural Integration. It is typically delivered as a series of ten hands-on physical manipulation sessions sometimes called "the recipe"   Who knew ? Consistency in changing only the first letter of the existing magazines may have made this puzzle a bit easier to solve, but it's still funny and punny.   Excepting IV / TV, they all also rhyme.  Stu probably had more choices and could probably have created a Sunday sized grid with this theme. How about "Magazine for helicopter designers?  Rotor Trend.    Or, "Magazine for practitioners of animal husbandry ?" Sired.   Maybe, "Magazine for Lumberyard professionals ? Wood Housekeeping. I'll stop now and leave it to the professionals.  Great job, Stu.  We're now going to explore that which remains.  And pardon me while I wander and reminisce. Across: 1. Cook Islands language: MAORI.     The Cook Islands are in the South Pacific ocean with 15 islands having a combined total land area of about 93 square miles.  For perspective, the city of Chicago covers about 234 sq. miles.   Los Angeles 469, and Houston 600 sq. miles.   The land area of the Cook Islands is about the size of Milwaukee (96), Sacramento (98), Lincoln, NE (89) or Tallahassee (100 sq. mi.). Spanish explorers visited the islands in the late 1500s and named one of the islands St. Bernard.  British Navigator James Cook came to the islands in the 1770s, and named one of the islands Hervey Island.  The name "Cook Islands" first appeared on a Russian naval chart in the 1820s. 78 % of the people on the island nation are Māori and another 7.8 % are part Māori.  The official languages are English and Cook Islands Māori.  The capital (and largest city) is Avarua, which might be a good answer in a crossword puzzle. 6. Place for mascara: LASH. 10. Rims: LIPs. 14. Ray __, NBAer with the most regular season 3-point field goals: ALLEN.   Retired HOF'er with  18 years in the NBA making 40 % of his attempts from beyond the line for 2973 buckets.   Active player Stephen Curry has hit 43.5 % of his 3-pointers during his 11 year NBA career, and is about 500 makes behind.  Note the consistency in the non-shooting hand. 15. Northern Oklahoma city: ENID.  Known as the "Wheat Capital" of Oklahoma for its immense grain storage capacity.  It has the third-largest grain storage capacity in the world.  Yes, that is a line of rail cars in the foreground.  The place is huge. There were some great shots on The Smithsonian Channel's Aerial America - Oklahoma the other day.  If you don't get that channel, watch for it to be shown on The Smithsonian's Aerial America YouTube channel. 16. Legal memo phrase: INRE. 19. Campus area: QUAD. 20. Place with shells: SEASIDE. 23. Informal negative: AIN'T.   Isn't wrong. 25. Chopper topper: ROTOR.   One of my part time military jobs (ODAA - other duties as assigned)) was working as part of the team at the "Can Point" when I was assigned to Coleman Army Airfield,  Coleman Barracks, 70th AVIM (aviation intermediate maintenance) Battalion, 1st Support Brigade (later, 21st Support Command), USAEUR (US Army Europe) at Sandhofen (Mannheim), Germany. My real job was in the computer vans, 3rd shift, feeding stack after stack of 80 column cards into a card reader, and then inserting magnetic ledger stock into the platen feed of an NCR 500 computer system. It was all part of the inventory control system used to keep track of orders and disbursements and stock on hand.  Occasionally keypunching new cards to replace mangled cards, and running the 088 card sorter from time to time after dropping a tray full of cards.  Tray after tray, night after night, week after week.  So monotonous.  I digress. Any rotor wing aircraft that went down in USAEUR were transported to the cannibalization point for selected salvage.  Rotor wings could not be salvaged for re-use, but were in demand by Air Cavalry battalions and companies around the country.  They would be used as art on the hangars or as gate toppers at entrances to Kasernes that housed rotor wing companies.  Most impressive and awe inspiring was when the heavy lift helicopters came in for inspection and maintenance.  The roar of the engines and sound of the rotors pounding the air was thunderous as the beasts approached and landed on the tarmac. CH-47 "Chinook" on the left and CH-54 "Tarhe" (Skycrane) on the right.   The Skycranes were being phased out of military service in Europe in the late '70s when I was there, and many passed through our airfield on their way back to the U.S. 32. Salchow relatives: AXELs.  Figure skating. 33. __-deucey: ACEY.   A card game or a backgammon game.  34. Hook partner: JAB.  Boxing. 37. Gobble (down): WOLF.  40. Coke __: ZERO.   Zero calorie, sugar free version of Coca-Cola.  Artificially sweetened.  I've never had one.  41. __-Caps: SNO.  Semi-sweet chocolates topped with nonpareils.  White ones, of course. 42. "Be there in __": A SEC.  What my wife says 10 minutes before she gets to the door as we are preparing to leave.  43. Wheel alignment: TOE-IN.   What You Need to Know About Tire Alignment 47. Weasel cousin: STOAT.  Not otter today.  A stoat (top) and a weasel (bottom) Stoat or weasel? How to tell the difference 50. "Get lost!": SHOO. 54. Pal of Barbarino in "Welcome Back, Kotter": EPSTEIN. 59. Afterthoughts: ANDs.  Oh, and the guy in the lower left is Barbarino and the guy in the top right is Epstein. 62. Leave in: STET.  Don't dele.  Obelisms.  A proofreader knows these symbols. 63. Half of Mork's sign-off: NANU.   Mork was the ET from the planet Ork on the sitcom Mork and Mindy. 64. Brew hue: AMBER. 65. __ d'oeuvres: HORS. 66. First column to add, usually: ONEs.   Units.  The first column of whole numbers to be added in a place-value numbering system.  Typically in base-10 (decimal) for most people, and the second column would be tens, the third hundreds and so on.  I know you knew that, but I'm building here. Programmers and others in technology use other place-value numbering systems, such as in base-8 (octal) where the columns would be units, eights, sixty-fours and so on, and in base-16 (hexadecimal) they would be units, sixteens, and the third column two hundred fifty-sixes. Quick, what's the first numbering system that comes to mind that is not place-value ? 67. Funny Anne: MEARA. So many roles, but perhaps best known as one half of the Stiller and Meara comedy team. Down: 1. Second-smallest of eight: MARS.  Our solar system's planets.  The "Red Planet", fourth from the sun.  Mercury is the smallest. 2. Ointment ingredient: ALOE.  Keep washing your hands and try to find a sanitizer with aloe in it. Does aloe work ?  Evaluation of aloe vera gel gloves in the treatment of dry skin associated with occupational exposure. 3. Cantina crock: OLLA. 4. Works the game: REFs.  Referees the game or bout. 5. Team with the longest World Series drought (71 years): INDIANS.   Should be championship drought.  They were in the 2016 World Series, and they were leading it 3 games to 1 in the best of 7 series over the Chicago Cubs.   The Cubs won the next two games, evening the series at 3 each. In the seventh and deciding game that many pundits have called one of the greatest game 7s (and series) in MLB history, the teams were tied at 6 runs each after 9 innings.   Then the skies opened up with a sudden downpour.  After the rain delay play resumed, and the Cubs scored two to take an 8-6 lead in the top of the tenth inning.  In the bottom of the tenth, the home field Indians plated one run with two out before the Tribe's loyal fans had their hopes squashed on a weak grounder to third baseman Kris Bryant. It was only the fifth time in World Series history that a Game 7 went to extra innings, and it was the first time the extra inning Game 7 was won by a road team.  The series and Game 7 were both dubbed "instant classics". The Cubs won and ended a 108 year championship drought of their own; the longest in professional sports history.  6. Folklore tale: LEGEND.   An example of early American literature was Washington Irving's The Legend of Sleep Hollow, but what inspired the work ?  7. Suffix with hex-: ANE. 8. "Absolutely!" in Madrid: SI SI. 9. Best Buy purchase: HDTV. 10. __ license: LIQUOR. 11. Greenland language: INUIT. 12. Madrid museum: PRADO. 13. Where the same questions are asked annually: SEDER. 18. "__ it my way": I DID.  22. Ethically uncertain, in Sussex: GREY.   I loved Dash-T's explanation a few weeks ago that, "Gray is a color, while grey is a colour".  24. Spells: TRANCEs. 26. Treat holders: PAWs. 27. Nerve impulse carrier: AXON. 28. HR dept. concern: RELO.   United Van Lines packed up my belongings and car when I was relocated from Houston to Chicago in late '87.   The company footed the bill for my relocation moving and living expenses.   Actually lived for almost two months in a new Holiday Inn that was still in the process of being constructed. Then January came, and I learned fast that my southeast Texas blood and wardrobe was ill-equipped to deal with Chicago's gusting winds and biting cold that would shiver your bones.  I ran to the mall and bought thermal underwear and the heaviest lined Burberry style trench coat I could find.  I didn't bother to ask HR to foot the bill on those items.  I know'd the answer was NO ! 29. Alien from Melmac: ALF.   Another extraterrestrial from TV land.   Anne Meara played the grandmother in occasional appearances on the sitcom. 30. __ dancing: ICE.   Like figure skating, but more freeform and interpretive. 31. "Oy __!": VEY.   Oy vey ! This crossword puzzle review has gone on too long.  But wait, there's more ! 34. Boo: JEER.  Please.  Bear with me, it'll be over soon. 35. Seed covering: ARIL. 36. M's favorite agent: BOND.   James Bond's boss and head of MI6, portrayed by Dame Judy Dench in eight of the movies.   38. 24 hrs.-per-day retail channel: HSN.   Home Shopping Network 39. Wine: Pref.: OEN.  From the ancient Greek word oinos.   "The translators of the KJV, by uniformly rendering the Greek word oinos as wine, replicated the Greek word’s reference to both fermented and unfermented juice with an English word that, in their day, was similarly general in reference." 40. Wild place: ZOO.    The nickname for Gerszewski Barracks in Knielingen (Karlsruhe) Germany, my second station while serving there.  The Zoo had an entirely different atmosphere than Coleman.   Still the military, but significantly fewer officers and Warrant Officers (mostly helicopter pilots at Coleman) and MPs than Coleman.  Definitely more relaxed.  Coleman was the home to the USAEUR Confinement Facility, where soldiers in serious trouble awaited trial, were serving sentences up to a year, or for the most serious offenses, were awaiting orders for transportation back to the U.S. to serve extended time at Ft Leavenworth, KA. 42. Jam component: AUTO.   Seriously, was I the only one that first thought of pectin ? 43. Type of fastball grip: TWO SEAM.   Baseball.   Even ardent fans may not be aware of the arsenal that Yu Darvish brings to the mound.  44. Blue Ribbons, e.g.: PABSTs.   PBRs, for short.  Pabst Blue Ribbon beer.  Not my cuppa, but it'll do in a pinch. 45. Monkey used in research: RHESUS. 46. Future junior: SOPH. 47. Big hit: SMASH.   As in an exceptionally popular TV, movie or stage show, or for tennis fans such as Sandyanon, the return shot answer to a poorly placed near-net lob shot.   48. :50, another way: TEN TO.   Me: "It's ten to five.  Are you ready yet ?  Are you coming ?"  Her: "I'll be there in a sec."   49. Stranger: ODDER. 52. "That's awful!": OH NO.   53. New Jersey university: KEAN.  Not familiar.  About   Yellowrocks, is that near you ? 55. Domesticate: TAME. 56. People Magazine's 2018 Sexiest Man Alive: ELBA.   Idris.  Hi, Lucina ! 57. Old Roman road: ITER. 58. Dragster's org.: NHRA.   The National Hot Rod Association (NHRA) and International Hot Rod Association (IHRA) are the two largest sanctioning bodies for drag racing.  The Great Lakes Dragaway in Union Grove, Wisconsin is still going strong.  The "Sunday, Sunday, Sunday" radio commercials for drag racing events can still be heard on radio stations across the country.  Well, maybe not right now, but they'll be back. 61. Austin-to-Dallas dir.: NNE.    For some, I-35 is known as Main Street, Texas.   Almost half of the Texas population (and most of my siblings and extended family) lives along this central artery that starts in Laredo, Texas near the Rio Grande, and exits the state just north of Gainseville at the Red River.   From there I-35 travels generally NNE all the way to Duluth, Minnesota,  comparatively just shy of the border with Canada. The reconstruction and widening of I-35 that started in 2012 is the second largest infrastructure project in the history of the state for TxDOT, the state's Department of Transportation.  The first ?  Building I-35 in the first place, which started in the '50s as part of Eisenhower's Interstate System.   It will be nice, and much safer when it is finally done. Use the Zoom In, Zoom Out buttons on the map to view greater detail or a wider view, and use your mouse to move around.  "Ain't Isn't wrong" technology grand ? Finally, here's the grid: #TTP #StuAgler #Friday

Arplis - News source https://arplis.com/blogs/news/friday-may-8-2020-stu-agler

[tisfan]

{So there's this story that happened where this girl goes on a date with her boyfriend to a baseball game. The kiss cam pans over them and the girl gets really excited but the boyfriend is too preoccupied with his phone. So she kisses the guy next to him instead. I had an idea with one of my partners where Tony is the girl, Ty (or whoever) is the douche boyfriend, and Bucky is the guy sitting next to her. They of course exchange numbers in the end.}

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang 

God, baseball was sooo boring. 

Only in baseball was it impossible for more thanone team to score. They took fucking turns like it was pre-school and they werein line to use the teeter totters. The closest thing Tony’d ever seen toexcitement at a baseball game was the time Howard took him and drank so muchcheap beer that he ended up puking in a trash can on the way out of thestadium. That had almost been worth the sprained wrist when Howard shoved himout of the way. Almost. 

The worst part of it was, Ty didn’t even likeit. Not really. Or, if he did, maybe he’d be paying more attention to the gamethan to his fucking phone. 

Tony had already gotten up three times; once toget himself a beer and a hotdog (and he’d probably regret that hotdog later),once to use the bathroom, and once because the giant jumbo trons had advertiseddeep fried oreos, and Tony had to try one. He was definitely going to regretthat. Good, though. 

Ty hadn’t looked away from his phone the wholegoddamn game. Really, the score could be five hundred to seven and Ty would say“that’s nice” or “uh-huh” without looking up. What the hell was so goddamninteresting over there? 

Tony knew better than to try to look, though. Tydid not like what he considered an invasion of his privacy. 

The guy on the other side was kinda cute,though, so Tony turned away and watched that guy watching the game. 

Brunette, with a ragged haircut, half of hishair pulled back in a half-ponytail, he wore a red henley shirt and a brownjacket. He had a baseball cap with the team logo on it, but it fell off hishead almost every time he stood up to yell and scream, and since the man wasconstantly jumping to his feet, the hat was on the ground more often than itwas on his head. He jumped up to yell about strikes, about good pitches, aboutruns, about stolen bases. 

When a batter made a lousy ground ball, the mansurged to his feet again and yelled, “Go, Babushka power!” 

Tony couldn’t help it, he cracked up. “Go go grandmothers!” 

The guy turned around and grinned. “You speakRussian?” 

Tony wiggled his hand, comme ci, comme ça. “Understand it betterthan I can speak it. My tutor claims my accent stinks on ice.” 

“A common complaint of tutors,” the manresponded. He paused, leaned forward in his chair. “Go on, you little shit,steal that base, I fuckin’ dare you.” 

“You’re awfully invested,” Tony observed. 

“Got a hot hundred riding on the outcome of thegame,” the guy said. “And Baltimore sucks.” 

“If you say so,” Tony said. He flicked his eyesto the scoreboard; he really hadn’t been paying attention to the game. Orioleswere up a run and they were still at bat. “Looks like they might not suck ashard as you think.” 

Tony was studied the board, doing statisticalanalysis in his head. If current trends could predict future outcome, he wasgoing to give Baltimore a 72.952% chance of winning the game, probably by tworuns. He did not share this information with his neighbor. That just seemedrude. 

The inning ended without the Orioles scoringanother run, so that was encouraging. Tony readjusted his prediction. Hethought about sharing his thoughts with Ty, but another glance at his boyfriendshowed that would be a bad plan. Ty was now scowling at his phone, as ifsomething had upset him. Tony knew better than to interrupt him now. He leanedtoward his neighbor again. “You think they’ve got an upset in the making?” 

“They’re warming up the bullpen,” the man said,jerking his chin toward the Yankee bullpen. “New pitcher’ll shake things up.” 

Tony squinted. “Do you know who it is?” Thatcould definitely change his predictions. He pulled out his program and flippedto the roster. 

“Do you care?” the man asked, friendly, nothostile. “You haven’t been paying attention til just now.” 

“It’s more interesting when someone else isinterested,” Tony said. “I’m Tony, by the way.” 

“Bucky,” the man said, then rattled off the newpitcher’s name and jersey number. He leaned over Tony’s arm and tapped theprogram. 

Tony scrolled down. 

“Oh, hey,” Bucky said, nudging him. “You’re onthe kiss-cam.” 

What? 

Tony looked up. The camera, with little heartsand lip-prints in a frame, was centered on Bucky and him. Huh. Well, maybe theylooked like a couple, huddled over the program like they’d been. Sigh. Heturned and tapped Ty on the shoulder. 

“Honey?” 

Ty swatted at his hand and the whole crowd madea disapproving noise. “Not now, Tone.” 

“Ty,” Tony tried again. Ty would be so pissed if-- 

“I said, knock it off,” Ty said, turning aroundand poking his phone. 

“Mu'dak,” Bucky muttered under hisbreath. Asshole. Tony didn’t exactly disagree. He’d been dating TiberiusStone for almost three months, but he was starting to get the feeling that itwouldn’t be going on much longer. If he wasn’t wrong, Ty was probably textingwith his side-boy anyway. Tony kept trying to ignore that (first of all, thathe knew about it and Ty kept acting like Tony didn’t, because Ty had verylittle respect for Tony’s intelligence, which was just annoying, and secondly,because it was insulting. Tony was very good sex and a very attentive boyfriendand it was painful to be ignored and neglected.) 

Tony sighed and settled back in his chair, butthe kiss-cam didn’t move. Oh, for fuck’s sake. 

“Hey, I’ll kiss you, if he won’t,” Buckyoffered, then blushed absolutely, gloriously red at his own gumption. 

Tony blinked, then leaned over, his mouthalready puckering. 

Tony had meant it to be a joke kiss, a quicksmack on the mouth, enough to get the camera to go bother someone else. Stickit to Ty, maybe, for ignoring Tony all night. 

But when Bucky’s mouth touched his, Tony’sintentions went up in flames. Just like the rest of him. Tony found himselfwith his hands in Bucky’s hair, the man’s tongue sliding over his lip. The feelof his mouth was electric, shockingly erotic. His jeans got a little tighterthan was truly comfortable and he was half a second from climbing into theman’s lap when someone grabbed the back of his shirt and yanked, nearly chokinghim. 

“Tony!” 

“Hey, let go of ‘im,” Bucky said, standing up.“You’re hurting him.” 

“He’s --” Ty gestured like he couldn’t believethe utter gall. “Kissing someone else, right in front of me!” 

“You had your chance,” Bucky snapped. “If youpaid more attention to your man rather than you’re fuckin’ phone --” 

“Boys, boys,” Tony hissed, putting his hands upto separate them. “It’s sweet that you both want to take me to prom, but can Ipoint out that we’re on the goddamn camera?” Still. What the hell, hadsomeone fallen asleep up there? Jesus Christ. 

“You know what?” Ty said, brushing off hisshirt. “You keep him. He’s boring. And worthless. And he gives terrible blowjobs.” 

Tony gaped at him. “That --” 

“Face it, Tony, you suck worse than the Cubs.” 

Tony didn’t know enough about baseball to reallyunderstand that, but the way Bucky sucked air, Tony was willing to believe he’djust been burned. “That’s a lie.” He turned to Bucky and repeated, veryseriously, “That is a lie.” 

“I’m outta here,” Ty said. He turned and strodeoff, all indignant fury. 

“Don’t forget your phone,” Bucky mocked. 

Tony slowly sank into the seat. What the hellhad just happened? 

“You do not need that kind of asshole in yourlife,” Bucky said, a little tentative. “But… um, sorry for ruining your date?” 

“Nah,” Tony said. “I think it was alreadyruined. I just…” 

“Make it up to you?” Bucky offered. 

Tony slanted a glance at the man. “How?” 

“Dinner? Dancing? You don’t seem t’ likebaseball much, so, you know, another game is probably out.” 

Tony looked over at the Jumbo Tron again. “Idunno, I could get used to it.” He might grow to have fond memories of thatkiss-cam. “Sure. A date, then.” 

Bucky grinned. “I’ll try not to strike out.” 

Oh, god. Puns… Tony was in love already.“Maybe, if you’re really good, I’ll let you get to second base.” 

“I got a pretty good line coach,” Bucky said.“He might help me steal third.” 

Tony rolled his eyes. “I call foul. That wasterrible. Really, really terrible.” 

But when Bucky did steal a kiss, after walkingTony out to the train, Tony thought third base wasn’t entirely out of reach. 

After the first date. 

[spotlightsaga]

Kevin Cage of @spotlightsaga reviews... GLOW (S01E05) Debbie Does Something Airdate: June 23, 2017 Ratings: @netflix original Score: 8.25/10 **********SPOILERS BELOW********** GLOW's 5th episode continues to move the show on the exact path that it needs to be taking... You can bet your bottom dollar that Kenny Herzog over at Vulture is still pissing me off... And in the spirit of Professional Wrestling, even snarky, positive reviews will be met with my tongue lashing wrath. Clearly something needs to be addressed because when it comes to Kenny, the man just can't give a review without sliding a dirty note underneath the door. He usually tries to pepper them among the reviews to hide his ludicrous notions that demonstrate a lack a full understanding and perspective of Professional Wrestling... And I like to 'bussitwideopen', if you will. By no surprise of any wrestling fan, GLOW has instantly become the big hit of the summer. Everyday I jump on twitter and you can pretty much bet GLOW is trending somewhere in the Top 20, depending on the time of day. People are watching and it's not just pro-wrestling fans, this is a show that's resonating with a broad circuit of fans of Arts & Entertainment and honestly, there's countless reasons for that. First of all, Kenny, never disrespect 'Tears For Fears' or 'Scorpions'. ECW was really the main promotion that defied all the music laws and had their wrestlers come out to whatever song they had no permission or license for. Simply put, Paul Heyman did not give a fuck... And even though ECW came about a year or so after GLOW ended, Professional Wrestling has always embodied the obviousness of pop culture, keeping it ironically now, and later... Hilariously dated. The music selection GLOW is using has been on the nose for this type of series, and if anything it enhances that shared excitement wrestling fans pass around a venue when their favorite wrestler's music hits, whether it be a few hundred people at a small Indy Show or 100k at a wrestling spectacle the likes of the pop culture phenomenon, WrestleMania... And yes, I said 'WrestleMania' out loud with the deep, rumbling intensity that WWE Guru Vincent K McMahon would have delivered the term he himself coined himself if he was sitting in the commentary booth with Gorilla Monsoon or Jerry Lawler (on one of his good days). 2nd Issue, Kenny... If you can't shout out every single real life wrestler that was used in this episode, then maybe don't list so many and leave out the most important one; Christopher Daniels (who is, btw, NOT the current ROH World Champion - on the 23rd Cody Runnels or Cody Rhodes took that honor), Frankie Kazarian, Kevin Kiley Jr aka Alex Riley were all mentioned. Thats just perplexing to me because none of those names are worth mentioning without the one, the only, sleazy, breezy, boob-plexing tease-y, hairy cub stud, lollipop licking, penis flipping, 'World's Cutest Tag Team' shipping, don't tell this man there will be no 'double dipping', sexiest man alive... King of Dong Style... Joey Fn' Ryan. Mmmmh'kay? Seriously, all wrestling fans should take offense to this. Joey Ryan (Joseph Meehan) is the man... And when he shows up on Netflix as 'Mr Monopoly', you throw that dirty dog a bone! Now Now, there will be no 3rd thing... In all truth, I'm just trying to embody the true spirit of Professional Wrestling here, but Kenny... If you want to square up in the ring, just let me know the time and places and we can do the damn thing. Truth is, besides the little (massive) issues, you're review was pretty spot on... And I'm glad that you as well as other critics, bloggers, and reviewers have suddenly realized that there's no reason to rush into action. GLOW will 'live long and prosper' for many seasons. Frankly, 10 episodes at this length is just simply not enough. That's exactly why I'd be just fine with a 4-5 season run to match the original series that this show is based on. In 'Debbie Does Something', Debbie (Betty Gilpin) goes to her first wrestling show and screws her first wrestler. Her sudden realization and bubbling excitement that wrestling is exactly like what she's been working on in her Hollywood career all her life, soap operas, is both exciting and infectious. She continues to prove she has terrible taste in men though, because I don't know anyone who'd screw Kevin Kiley Jr over Joey Ryan... And you can take that to the bank, Joey. Debbie has a 'moment' with Cherry... She was ready to throw her wall of defense up when Cherry approached her, but Cherry and Debbie share a common bond; They are both bad bitches, top dawgs, if you will. It's nice to see Debbie finally letting go and living a little, even if she feels slightly guilty. It's all part of the healing process, baby! Cherry (Sydelle Noel) has been cracking down on the women breaking curfew, particularly Melrose (Jackie Tohn). I found it amusing that Melrose encouraged Debbie to stay out and then went directly back to The Dusty Spur and told Cherry what Debbie was up to, if for nothing else just for shits and giggles... Or maybe to prove her own personal point with Cherry. Those two have tension mounting naturally and I'd love to see those two square off in the ring in the near future. Halfway through the series and I'm already envisioning future rivalries, I love it! Jackie Tohn just embodies Melrose so well, and even though there were no consequences for the soon to be star of GLOW (and Melrose probably knew that's how it would play out), it seems like exactly something that the Melrose character would've done... Always stirring the pot, a natural heel! Just because Debbie does something and someone, doesn't mean Ruth is still stuck in her own personal existential prison. Just like her rival and her other 'Sisters of the Squared Circle', Ruth made great headway too, coming up with her Russian wrestling persona at the opening of their sponsor's Patio Furniture dealership. Not only is this a huge step for Ruth career wise, she's basically positioned herself into programs with two women now... Both of which are positioned in real life drama that cultivated outside of the ring... The obvious Main Event with Debbie as the All American vs The Evil Commie Russian and what I hope will ending up being a lead-in program to sharpen her claws with Rhonda aka Brittanica (Kate Walsh), who's been sleeping with Sam (Marc Maron) to get ahead. You could tell there was some tension mounting as Rhonda did not like the attention Ruth was able to finagle at their sponsors grand opening... But hey, yet again, that's exactly what you have to do in the wrestling business, just ask Vince McMahon. He'll tell ya, 'Reach for the Brass Ring!' What that really means is seize every opportunity and play your cards right or you'll end up a Mid-Carder for life... Or worse, you could working for TNA! 💯

[writingsubmissions]

Fights to Make: UFC Nashville

Cub Swanson (beat Artem Lobov) vs. Ricardo Lamas/Chan Sung Jung (Jul. 22) winner: Swanson’s win over Lobov was one of a few fights on this card where I’m not exactly sure what to make of things - Swanson was clearly the better fighter, but given that he’s about a top four featherweight and I’m not sure Lobov’s in the top forty, it’s kind of baffling that Swanson was never able to really pull away and complete dominate the fight. That probably suggests Swanson is going to be overmatched once he gets back to facing championship contenders, but, frankly, that should probably be his next fight, since he still has a bunch of momentum in the division. It sounds like Swanson’s taking some time off - he’s expecting a child, and fighting all these wars is tough - so I like the idea of him facing either Ricardo Lamas or The Korean Zombie after those two square off in late July, either on the Fox card in Long Island or UFC 214. Swanson/Jung’s the action fight that pretty much everyone has been eyeing, and even Swanson/Lamas would be a fun fight between two vets - and a rematch of a 2011 Lamas win - that would have huge stakes as a potential title eliminator.

Al Iaquinta (beat Diego Sanchez) vs. Michael Johnson: Well, Iaquinta pretty much picked up where he left off in every aspect - he completely annihilated Diego Sanchez, then had a weird post-fight interview where he seemed more interested in his real estate business than advancing his fight career, and then cursed out the UFC on social media for not giving him a performance of the night bonus. So, who knows when we’ll see Iaquinta again - if it’s anytime soon, Michael Johnson would make for a fun striking match that could shoot Iaquinta into the ranks of the contenders, but given his on-again/off-again status with the company, who knows how far they’re going to push him.

John Dodson (beat Eddie Wineland) vs. Bryan Caraway: Well, Dodson regressed badly here, even in a win - he had looked more aggressive and more tactical since moving up to bantamweight, but this was similar to some of his worst flyweight fights; Wineland just couldn’t keep up with Dodson’s speed, and Dodson saw no reason to push the fight past that, just remaining passive, avoiding damage, and just coasting to a boring win. I’m kind of iffy on even moving him up the ladder, but I guess give him Caraway, who at least might be able to adjust on the fly and always has that grappling game, I guess. It’s amazing how my enthusiasm for Dodson fights waxes and wanes depending on his last performance.

Brandon Moreno (beat Dustin Ortiz) vs. Jussier Formiga: Moreno had one of the best performances on the card, overcoming some early trouble to score a dynamic finish of Dustin Ortiz in his biggest test to date - he’s much more under the radar, but Moreno is looking like every bit the phenom and potential Mexican star that Yair Rodriguez has been. At this point, I’d just keep testing Moreno to see how high he can get this early in his career, and Formiga’s a stalwart of the top five of the division that can test Moreno’s excellent grappling.

Ovince St. Preux (beat Marcos Rogerio de Lima) vs. Corey Anderson: I’m happy St. Preux finally got a win, as de Lima pretty much imploded and let himself get tapped out, but less enthusiastic that OSP’s in such a thin division that UFC’s going to have to pretend he can still be a viable contender. It’s hard to find an interesting fight for St. Preux, since he’s fought a lot of guys and they’ve wound up being pretty decisive, so I guess go with Anderson next - both are kind of in a similar spot as guys too flawed to move too high up the rankings, but too talented to get too low, though I at least still have hope Anderson can get better.

Thales Leites (beat Sam Alvey) vs. Vitor Belfort: Leites is another guy who completely regressed, even in a win - there was a brief period where Leites was showing some confident striking and knockout power to go with his always-solid grappling base, but now he’s back to being the same timid, fairly unwatchable guy that got cut from his first UFC stint. Leites injured Alvey early with some leg kicks and then...did nothing, for the most part, coasting to a blah decision. Vitor Belfort’s looking for a retirement fight in Brazil, and if Leites is completely toothless once again, he’s probably the best opponent Belfort can actually beat, so do that.

Eddie Wineland (lost to John Dodson) vs. Rob Font: Dodson was faster than Wineland expected and that was pretty much that, as a boring decision loss put an end to Wineland’s recent career resurgence. Still, Wineland’s a solid top-fifteen gatekeeper that can have a fun fight against the right opponent, and Font’s a talented, exciting guy around the same level, so that could be a great fight and an opportunity for Font’s biggest win to date.

Stevie Ray (beat Joe Lauzon) vs. Islam Makhachev: I’m of two minds on how to book Ray next - he’ll obviously figure prominently on July’s card in his native Scotland, and I see him as more future action fighter than contender - so do you treat him as an action fighter and just give him a fun matchup to make the fans happy, or try to move him up the ladder against a stout wrestler, since even with this impressive comeback win from Lauzon, Ray’s defensive grappling is still an obvious liability. I’ll go the latter route and put him against Russian wrestler Makhachev, even if I worry it’ll be a grinding one-sided decision for Makhachev and be sort of a lowlight for a card in Scotland.

Mike Perry (beat Jake Ellenberger) vs. Leon Edwards: I really wish Perry wasn’t a garbage human - he had some early trouble here, but his standing elbow knockout of Ellenberger was a beautiful bit of violence that would make anyone a fan...as long as they didn’t know literally anything else about Mike Perry. But anyway, looks like Florida Man is here to stay, and Perry against Edwards, a streaking British prospect, would make for a fun fight to see where both guys are at in their move up the ladder.

Alexis Davis (beat Cindy Dandois) vs. Ketlen Vieira: Well, Davis is still solidly a top-ten bantamweight, but this whole fight against Dandois was just...oof. Davis won the grappling exchanges of the bout, which is a feather in her cap, but Dandois’s striking is so awful that it’s just hard to get excited about any sort of win over the Belgian. Davis seems like a gatekeeper who’s slowly getting aged out of the division as better female athletes start to take up MMA, so let’s use her in that role against Vieira, who improved greatly in between her two UFC fights thus far.

Jake Ellenberger (lost to Mike Perry) vs. Tim Means: Although Ellenberger is ostensibly an action fighter, his fights haven’t been all that fun anymore, as some tentativeness and a lack of durability make his fights just seem like a countdown to him getting knocked out like he did here. But since UFC seems to be on a kick of putting Ellenberger in tough fights until he decides to quit, I guess continue that streak against Means, who always brings the violence and needs a bounce-back win.

Artem Lobov (lost to Cub Swanson) vs. Alexander Volkanovski/Mizuto Hirota (Jun. 10) winner: On the one hand, Lobov seems like a nice guy, so it’s nice that he acquitted himself well here, but I really am worried that UFC will run with the whole “he survived against a top five guy” angle and, along with his friendship with Conor McGregor, keep trying to push Lobov as a going concern in fights against guys who could be doing something more interesting. In actuality, this was only really Lobov’s second performance where he looked like he actually belonged in the UFC, and probably took him from “guy you need to beat to stay on the roster” to someone who can be a fun test for actual prospects. To that end, if top Australian prospect Alexander Volkanovski can get past Mizuto Hirota in June, that’d be a fun next test, and if it winds up turning into Lobov/Hirota, well...at least you’re not wasting the time of anyone interesting.

Joe Lauzon (lost to Stevie Ray) vs. Polo Reyes/James Vick (May 13) winner: Lauzon’s still in the same role - good enough to give any prospect a test, but flawed enough that he’s easily beatable; he pretty much destroyed Ray for a round here, but then gassed badly and even gave up a potential 10-8 round himself at the end of things. But Lauzon’s still a fun fighter, and Polo Reyes and James Vick are fun fighters squaring off at UFC 211, so let’s make that fight for a shot at Lauzon, who’d be the biggest win for either guy yet.

Sam Alvey (lost to Thales Leites) vs. Hector Lombard: Leites injured Alvey’s ankle almost immediately with some leg kicks, and that was pretty much that - Alvey couldn’t really plant for his big power punches, and while he continued to apply some pressure, it didn’t really get him anywhere. Let’s do a weird fight to see if Hector Lombard has any explosiveness left, even though it could devolve into an awful staring contest.

Diego Sanchez (lost to Al Iaquinta) vs. Tony Martin: I thought Sanchez had still looked surprisingly effective in some recent victories, but Iaquinta annihilated him here and confirmed that Sanchez’s chin has officially cracked, and without that durability I don’t really care to see him fight again. Martin’s probably the least dangerous guy I can think of as far as being able to crack Sanchez, since he’s mostly a power grappler, so maybe do a retirement fight for Sanchez, and then call it a day.

Dustin Ortiz (lost to Brandon Moreno) vs. Matheus Nicolau: Ortiz looked really good here, continuing the momentum from his big win over Zach Makovsky...and then got knocked out and tapped out by uber-prospect Moreno. Whoops. Ortiz is in a similar spot to fellow Tennessee native OSP above - he’s past facing scrubs, but doesn’t really deserve a contender, and in a thin division, he’s fought a lot of guys around the same level already. I guess go with Nicolau, a talented Brazilian who beat John Moraga last July, but is currently dealing with a bunch of USADA issues.

Danielle Taylor (beat Jessica Penne) vs. Tatiana Suarez: Well, Taylor seems to be slowly refining her gameplan - she’s absolutely tiny, so she just chooses to circle at range and divebomb in with power shots, and that worked as well as it ever has here against Penne, even though I’m not sure she deserved the decision. I have no idea what you do with her, but I guess she’s a fine enough test for former TUF winner and top prospect Suarez to start off her UFC career proper against.

Hector Sandoval (beat Matt Schnell) vs. Louis Smolka: Sandoval looked good here, winning a fun sprint with some absolutely brutal hammerfists and showing he has some actual power at 125. I like the idea of a fight against Smolka, who’s slid down the ladder after three straight losses - it’d be huge stakes with Smolka probably fighting for his contract and Sandoval looking for the best win of his career.

Bryan Barberena (beat Joe Proctor) vs. Lyman Good: This was probably prospect-killer Barberena’s most fun win to date, as things turned into a brawl fairly quickly before he knocked out Proctor. I’d just keep feeding him fun mid-card guys, and it’s about time for Good, a former Bellator champ who won his debut in 2015 and has been off the radar ever since, to make his return and face a solid gatekeeper like “Bam Bam”.

Scott Holtzman (beat Michael McBride) vs. Damien Brown/Vinc Pichel (Jun. 10) winner: Michael McBride wouldn’t go away, but Holtzman continued to beat the piss out of him, and that’s probably his role going forward - low-level brawls or showcase fights where Holtzman can just sort of hoss out and rely on his former hockey enforcer background. To that end, Brown and Pichel are both scrappy lower-level guys that can either give Holtzman a fight, or just keep hanging around if they can’t.

Marcos Rogerio de Lima (lost to Ovince St. Preux) vs. John Phillips: De Lima is what he is - he’ll miss weight, try to go for a finish for about three or four minutes, then gas out and crumble. He was slated for a fight against Conor McGregor teammate Phillips in January, so let’s re-book that. Sure.

Jessica Penne (lost to Danielle Taylor) vs. Nina Ansaroff: Penne didn’t look bad here, but once it became apparent she couldn’t get Taylor to the floor, it became a weird fight that could’ve gone either way. Penne badly needs a win in her next fight, as this came after two straight losses to top competition, so I like the idea of her against Ansaroff in a winnable fight for either fighter that would be Penne fighting for her career versus Ansaroff fighting to make her own.

Joe Proctor (lost to Bryan Barberena) vs. Mike Pyle: Proctor’s a fun enough fighter, but pretty much roster fodder, so I wouldn’t be shocked to see him used in a role something like a fight with Pyle, where the story becomes more about Pyle having anything left rather than anything Proctor can or can’t do.

Matt Schnell (lost to Hector Sandoval) vs. Neil Seery: This loss brings Schnell’s UFC record to 0-2, but he’s talented and fun, so I hope he gets another shot. He’d make for a nice retirement opponent against Seery - it’d be a fun fight and winnable for either guy.

Cindy Dandois (lost to Alexis Davis) vs. Sarah Moras: I have no idea what you do with Dandois - she’s a dangerous grappler, but the worst striker in UFC since...I have no idea when, so every fight of hers is just going to be a weird crapshoot. I’m not sure where Sarah Moras has been - probably just nursing injuries - but sure, that’s a fight.

Michael McBride (lost to Scott Holtzman) vs. Claudio Puelles: It’s probably two and out for McBride, who just got repeatedly starched by Holtzman in this fight but still managed to survive. If he gets another fight, I guess make it loser leaves town against TUF: Latin America 3 runner-up Puelles, who’s talented but seems kind of flaky.