#maybe swinging a bat at a hornets nest but whatever

[visit-ba-sing-se]

Hey so if you truly think that not voting is neutral or a good form of protest, please take one moment to think about why there are so many bot-written comments and whole misinformation campaigns dedicated to keep you from casting your vote. And why gerrymandering is a thing. Why the right to vote first was only given to the rich and wealthy, why the fight for woman's suffrage took so long, and why some people are still barred from voting today. Why facists show up at the booth to threaten voters, and why they pass laws that serve no other purpose but voter suppression. Because your vote has power, however little. And if you decide to give that power up, someone else will gladly take it.

[lopeach]

i get why ppl are upset abt the murderbot casting and i feel it a little too but yall know that masculine ppl can be agender too right? yall know that agender (nonbinary in general) people can and very much are able to be masculine and its not just woman+ ,,,,,right?

[regionbetween]

some of yall rly just dislike ftms and are proud of it. not all of us are """"transandrophobia truthers""""" and """"hate trans women and think we're better than them and think misandry is real""""" just bc we talk abt the very specific and REAL issues we face being both trans and men. the trans men who DO do this are not fighting for us and do not deserve to be taken seriously and generalized as the face of "transandrophobia" therefore all of the issues we are fucking begging other lgbt people to pay attention to get swept under the rug bc we're all just whack misogynists. im so done talking abt this. this is why a giant percentage of us go stealth and abandon the community that's supposed to help us. ive literally seen it happen. you people do not care about us and it is so glaringly obvious

[hungerofhadarr]

After screenshotting my original 1:27 am rant just for safekeeping and returning to this line of thought, I think I would like to swing this bat at a hornets nest . And I shall call it ;

BG3 And Polyamory, AKA The Discourse From The Eyes Of The Polyamorous

Hi, I am now disclosing the polyamorous part of my queer identity to the internet. Yay! Remember, I am only one polyamorous person on this website and I am not the spokesperson. This is just my own opinion and my own feelings with how both the game and the fandom seem to be handling the inclusion of polyamorous relationships and characters.

And in my humble opinion: Yikes !

This should be no surprise, but the polyamorous rep in bg3 isn’t … really good . It’s there, sure, and maybe I’m the fool for expecting it to be good when it really is the first time I have ever really heard of a game having an actual polyamorous option. Like on purpose. But with how much bg3 was hyped up as being super inclusive and completely different from all other games in the genre, I had hoped that it would take a good approach to polyamorous people and relationships.

Suffice to say, it fell flat once I actually looked into it.

The companions listed as open for an open/poly relationship are Astarion, Shadowheart, Minthara, and Halsin . What’s wrong with that?

3/4 of these characters already feel like they lean into the conservative fear of polyamory . Three of them are the ‘ evil ‘ members of your party . While ( besides Halsin, but we’ll get to that ) the rest of the ‘ good ‘ character are all monogamous. Growing up in a conservative home, in a conservative province, discussions of the idea of polyamory always came back to the same argument. That only the strange and amoral would do it. Only people who can’t be trusted and don’t actually care about you want to be in a polygamous relationship. And sadly, that is what I see echoed in the choices of who is and isn’t polyamorous.

I romanced Wyll in my first playthru. I had always planned to romance Wyll, actually, since I first saw his design when I first learned of bg3 during its early access days. When I met Halsin next, and chose the options to flirt with him, I thought that a polyamorous relationship between my Tav, Wyll, and Halsin would be cute. I had hoped it would work. I had already seen plenty of Astarion and Halsin and Tav art and gifsets and every other piece of fan content floating around . I had hoped that maybe that bit I read about who is and isn’t open for polyamory was outdated, and I could have this relationship play out in my little playthru .

Of course, it came down to having to choose. And I shrugged it off, at first. Sure, Larian didn’t make Wyll polyamorous for whatever reason. It is the first game that has polyamorous options, and I can just continue the game but have that polyamorous relationship in my head as my canon for my character. That’s fine, that’s what I’ve done before. It can’t be different now, right?

But then, I looked online, opened Tumblr, wondering what other people would say. Not thinking that it would be a big debate about if it is or is not okay to pair certain characters in an ot3 or not.

Wyll can’t be polyamorous, because knightly tales of courting and the mere act of courting is strictly monogamous. Pairing him in an polyamorous relationship is fundamentally misunderstanding the character and you’ve missed the point of him if you do that. It’s wrong to want that, wrong to think about it. The game has polyamorous options, be happy with what you have.

And so, I felt guilty. Larian already set up this dichotomy between their good leaning characters having the normal and good monogamous relationship and the evil leaning characters having the strange and perverse polyamorous relationship. But then, to see that the mere act of pairing your own character with two characters because you think it’s cute, is now being looked down upon so heavily and being seen as a “ fundamental misunderstanding of the characters “. And to have those ideas an opinions suddenly become the most agreed and accepted stance on the topic? How was I supposed to feel anything other than shame. Like I had been enjoying the game wrong, in a backward way.

If Wyll was polyamorous, you do know his approach to love wouldn’t change, right? Same with Gale. Same with Karlach. Same with Lae’zel. None of them would suddenly have to have completely different approaches to love and how they want to show it and how they want to go about it. Wyll can still be replicating the courting, the dancing, the slow burn that he always heard about in bards tales and he could still be polyamorous. There’s this idea that polyamorous love is only able to be expressed in very specific, very narrow ways. That miss the point of what love is.

People don’t act like this with the polyamorous companions, I’ve noticed. You aren’t suddenly bad and misunderstanding the story of Astarion or Shadowheart or Minthara or Halsin for having a strict two person relationship with them, and not expanding into the idea of those characters taking on another partner at some point. If you have Astarion in a strict monogamous relationship, no one says anything. But saying that you have a Tav who’s dating both Karlach and Gale? People are going to talk about you. They’re going to make vague posts. They’re going to talk about how it is Impossible for those characters to Ever be comfortable in a polyamorous relationship and how it is Wrong to protray them as happy in one.

I didn’t think people forgot that the stereotype of monogamy = good and polyamory = bad is still alive and well, but it seems that when it comes to the funny dungeons and dragons video game, it’s okay to prop that stereotype up and get mad when that is possibly challenged.

Now, what about Halsin? He’s a strictly good companion. He cannot fall under the pervious argument, so is he an exception?

No. It’s worse.

Halsin being polyamorous stems in racism. Wood Elves are all described as being polyamorous, and that they do not understand jealousy. And that they do not ever settle with any of their partners. And that the relationships they have are seen as “ doomed to fail “ . This is a stereotype. Commonly associated with indigenous people. That we cannot hold a ‘ proper ‘ relationship and that we always sleep around . We didn’t fit the white model of what a (white) family and a (white) relationship should look like, so the stereotypes and misconceptions started. And, unsurprisingly, ended up as another bit of dnd racism and bioessentialism.

Halsin doesn’t uphold the pervious argument at all, but he shows another part of the discussion that I don’ t think anyone really thought of. The racism stereotypes didn’t vanish when Larian made BG3, they’re all still there. You still have good races and evil races. You still have all the dnd bioessentialism that everyone was so keen to say was gone or just pretended it wasn’t there anymore.

And Halsin is an example of those stereotypes that people are still feeding. So much content with him in it narrows him down to ‘ Big Elf that Fucks and is Horny ‘ or ‘ Big Elf that can be Sexualized no matter What he Does ‘ and it is because Larian didn’t remove the stereotypes in the first place , and fandom doesn’t care enough to take a step back for a second to realize they’re playing into them.

Am I saying you shouldn’t have an ingame polycule with the characters available? No. If it’s cute, and you like it , and it makes sense with the story you’re making for your character, and literally just because you can, go for it! But for the love of god, can we be a bit more careful with how we treat the concept of polyamorous relationships and how we talk about them? Polyamory isn’t just a fandom thing with your ot3s, it’s a real life thing. And we can see how you treat people just having fun with their characters. You understand that, once you get that torn up over the act of making three characters hold hands, it becomes a little bit hard to forget that that is the attitude you hold towards the concept of polyamory when it doesn’t fit the molds you’ve subscribed to.

[gg-is-a-loser]

okay so i don’t know i might be swinging a bat at a hornet’s nest right now but. is it just me or did squishmallows copy squishables?

so these guys right. fine they’re cute whatever but…

these guys have existed for way longer. like even if it were just the black one i could maybe pass it off as coincidence but the nurse is way too similar. it hurts me

[cryptvokeeper]

I will be watching the swing-a-bat-at-every-possible-hornets-nest poll with absolutely RAPT attention however i am so disappointed about the way the polls so far seem to skew less “most annoying” and more “most thing I don’t like personally”

like just because you do not like a thing does not mean that the fandom is annoying annoying fandom is a title you gotta EARN

like I hold no ill will toward Danny phantom, I’m fond of it in my own way, but I know damn well that the fandom is fucking annoying and that danno shit clogging up my dash two days ago made me wanna bite someone. Game of thrones is bad or whatever, maybe if you’re on Facebook or Twitter they’re annoying but like. It’s just not tumblr annoying I’m sorry.

also it’s supposed to be MODERN fandom so as much as shit like hetalia and homestuck and rwby and undertale are notoriously annoying fandoms they were notorious in like. 2014. In the year of our lord 2023 they should NOT be winning any competitions.

[luxurybrownbarbie]

I think that one natural hair anon was weird but I think I get what they’re saying. a lot of the natural hair movement was for us to see our hair as our crowns, and you seem to not have that same mindset, like maybe youre ashamed of it or something since youre always dyeing or straightening yours. 🤔

…Okay. What am I supposed to do about that?

Not to swing a bat at a hornet’s nest here, but I don’t see my hair as my crown. Sorry. It’s literally just a dead protein that grows out of my scalp. It’s a mass of slightly loose, z shaped coils. It grows super quickly in the winter and very slowly in the summer. It starts breaking when I’m under even the slightest amount of stress. I’ve damaged the hell out of it before; I’ve chopped it off and moved on.

The natural hair movement has been amazing to witness and be a part of, and I’m so happy it is in full swing. It is beyond important to reframe the view of our natural hair, be unashamed of it, and learn the right ways to take care of it. It is fantastic and empowering to view your hair as a crown. But you also have to understand that for others, their empowerment comes from viewing their hair as simply hair, and nothing more. For some, assigning importance and expounding the uniqueness of their natural hair gives them comfort and joy. As it should. For others, it’s about not letting their hair be something bigger than them, no matter what society may think. It brings them comfort and joy. As it should. Both views are valid, and should be respected.

I don’t want to see my hair as my crown. I want to know how to take good care of it, how to moisturize it well, and how to minimize (or fix) whatever damage I’ve put it through. For me personally, seeing my hair as my crown would be exceedingly detrimental, because I would spend my time agonizing over anything I did with it. As a little kid, I was afraid to even get a trim because I didn’t want to compromise it in any way. Now, I’ve shaved it off, straightened it, bleached it, permed it, put it in dreadlocks, etc.

The act of surviving as a WOC (especially a Black woman) in society is hard enough. Society makes a huge deal out of our natural hair; I don’t think it’s such a shocking thing that in my own life and day to day existence, I don’t want to put any more stock into it besides doing something fun with it or changing it up every couple of years.

My body is not a discourse temple, nor is it the site on which I fight all of society’s racism and sexism battles.

[fletchfeathers]

swinging another titanium bat at another hornet’s nest today but god i just don’t care if someone wants to call themselves a bi lesbian or a pan lesbian or whatever. even if they’re not a chaotic catgirl hacker even if they’re just some guy. they’re not actually hurting you! if you hate it that much you can literally just ignore them!

i just see so many people getting so fuckin hung up on it and i’m just like. okay. why are you so so so invested in policing what labels people you don’t even know use to describe their experience. why is it so important to you. people’s sexuality doesn’t always fit in a neat little box, sometimes it’s complicated and messy and noah fence but i literally never see the people calling themselves bi/pan lesbians rocking up on y’all’s turf saying you have to change how you identify to accommodate them, only the other way around. the argument i keep seeing is “oh well lesbian needs to MEAN lesbian” and i just. language is fluid for one but also like nobody ,,, is arguing with you on that?

i think maybe it would be cool if the people getting super twisted up about this could like … just chill out for five entire minutes and go listen to some lo-fi beats to study and relax to and remember that the way other people, ESPECIALLY total strangers online who you have never spoken to/have never spoken to you, choose to describe their experience really is none of your business.

and at the end of the day all this community infighting is why it’s so hard to get anything meaningful done ever. we literally have bigger problems than the microlabels people use. can we all take a breather and focus our efforts on the stuff that Actually threatens all of us rather than a handful of lesbians calling themselves bi or pan in addition to lesbian? thanks ✌🏻

[oneshortdamnfuse]

I am going to swing a bat at a hornets nest here for a second because of the sheer amount of this kind of nonsense that gets recommended to me on other social media platforms because of silly algorithms that think I will enjoy it when I very much don't.

The whole Steddie vs. Hellcheer thing is so annoying. Like, ship whatever I don't give a shit, but some people have been absolutely vile towards the actress, Grace, and they've basically called anyone who ships Hellcheer p*dophiles. There is a two year age difference between Eddie and Chrissy. She is 18. They both liked each other. It's a fair basis for a ship. Y'all don't act the same way when I call out a full grown adult (Karen) being shipped with Billy when he was 17/18. In fact, no one seems to care at all. Most of the time people just blame Billy for it.

There's literally nothing wrong with imagining Chrissy, an abused kid, surviving and getting to enjoy her life with a guy who genuinely likes her. Nothing. It's not problematic.

We all know why Steddie became more popular, and it's not because it's compelling or there's a solid foundation in canon to work with. People wanted to replace a certain other "problematic" ship. People have repeatedly said as much, and it's why people have rabidly been producing Steddie art and fics. So maybe stay humble and stop harassing people because at the end of the day one of these ships is based on canon interactions and the other was made out of spite and you know which is which. If you're going to ship this, that's fine but be a decent person about it oh my god.

[lagomort]

Wait why do you hate the other Sigma ships??

Oh boy, you're really having me swing a bat at the Sigma Enjoyers hornet's nest here. This ask is from a long while ago, but I’m going to take a crack at it now.

I'll try my absolute best to keep this out of the tags. They can all do what they want, and I won’t ever attack people, but I do have some personal subjective thoughts.

I will clarify one thing: my Sigma/Reaper is so extremely riddled with headcanons that whatever the maybe Two other people who like this ship do, is absolutely not what I do. I acknowledge that I'm miles from canon and in the woods and do not pretend otherwise. I am weird... but I am free. 

I’ve written like 150k words of them also. Planning to just steal aspects of the characters that I like and give them to OCs, tbh. They’re like 80% there already.

Also obligatory Do Not Give Blizzard Money, Do Not Give Them Your Time, Let Them Fall Into The Sea, etc. I’m only here because I have worms in my brain. No I do not give them money or playtime either.

To give it a summary that you can skip if you like, I basically arrived at Sigper from:

- Self recognition through the other is the big one here.

- Also this comic. 

- They’re both people being manipulated by the people around them. I do still strongly subscribe to the Gabriel is brainwashed theory that arose from around the Retribution event. I will not let it go. The idea of there being some resentment there that got made bigger and bigger through some kind of chemical mind manipulation is so much better than him just becoming a murderer for kicks.

- (An aside: The characterisation for Gabriel presented by a certain short story is dumb. It’s really dumb. He’s not a god damn cop. He’s not gullible enough to believe anything Ak/ an/ de says of his own free will. He’s not consumed by violence like he’s a knockoff Punisher. And I refuse to have him be straight married with a kid. Yes I am in denial, no I won’t stop.)

- They’re both trapped in pretty terrible circumstances. Bonding through that isn’t uncommon.

- Unlike The Makers Of This Wretched Game, I do actually think Gabriel is extremely smart. He’s not a scientist but he knows a lot of things. He has a lot of diverse interests. Costume design, theatre, literature (masque of the red death costume baby!!!)... music, too. I think they have a lot of thoughts and feelings in common even though that would seem odd. 

- Given Reaper is basically indestructible, he’s the only person it would be impossible for Sigma to kill. Which is pretty important, given that for a long time he had no control over his abilities whatsoever. I also headcanon that Sigma can’t die (you can send me an ask about this too if you want, I have my funny reasons) so it’s kind of like... the bond of being the only bitch the other one can’t kill.

- Also Talon probably brought Reaper in to help out with sedation etc. when they needed to do tests on Sigma early on because you probably don’t want your doctors who can be crushed by space magic to be crushed by space magic. But you do have this other invincible dude hanging around.

- When I started liking them as a ship, they only had one single interaction. Or, more specifically, Sigma’s half which got datamined. And when it was eventually completed it involved Reaper actually being nice to someone, which made me utterly ecstatic. 

- ^ Because back then they actually characterised Sigma as basically a masking autistic man trying Very Very Hard to act normal, and not the bumbling annoyance to everyone he speaks to that he is in The Sequel. Of course now they have another interaction with the new game and it sucks but I Do Not See It.

- I imagine that Reaper’s basically contractually obligated to be nice to him, in my headcanon idea of it. You really don’t want the magic space guy who can bring the base down in an instant to find out that you’re a bunch of murderers. And then perhaps... it stops being obligation? Hm?

- Also objectively funny to ship when Michael Chu said that Sigma wasn’t going to be ‘walking down the corridor, running into Reaper’ in an interview.

- There’s more but I’ll spare you unless you actually want to read it.

Anyway. Onto my opinions on the other flavours, which is what you actually asked for. Obligatory you can like what you want disclaimer here.

1. Sigma x M o/i//r a: 1. She's just... so clearly a butch lesbian. Please stop doing this to her. 2. The only three flavours of this that basically ever exist are domestic, which I could never see Moira being into least of all from a man, her being his therapist for some reason, and just straight up rape/sexual abuse. Not doing it for me. 

2. Sigma x R ein//h ar/dt: This one isn't terrible or anything, I just really don't think they're compatible people. Yes I know this is very funny coming from the Sigper enjoyer, but it's also very very very boring to me. Most of the fic and fanart just has them being nice to each other with barely any plot glue to hold it together,  which is not my scene.

3. Sigma x Ha//ro ld W //ins ton: I literally cannot imagine a more boring ship. They were 'good friends' according to the lore which is normally a fun gay code phrase, but there is nothing that draws me to them. This one is just generically nice. There is no flavour. Harold is the Dead Fairytale Mother of O ve r//wa tch characters.

4. Sigma x M e r//c y: I've fallen asleep. You basically can't get more boring than this. There is nothing here aside from another woman to make into Sigma’s therapist.

5. Sigma x S//o m//b r a: Basically all the people I see ship this just use S o// m b//r a as their self insert for out of character age gap kink stuff and it is 1. really weird and 2. a disservice to both characters involved. Not at all my scene.

6. Sigma x Lu//c io: This one was around when Sigma came out and then, thankfully, dropped off the face of the earth. This is just... nothing to me.

7. Sigma x R oa//d h//og: There's only one person who does this one and I'm fascinated to learn how their brain works. How on earth did you even arrive at this. I need to study you.

8. Sigma x B ap//tis//e: Okay this one's extremely awesome. I wish more people liked it. I don't hate literally every Sigma ship that isn't Sigper, but that's not as dramatic to say. These two have a lot you can draw from, given their Talon affiliations, and it's criminally underutilized in the fandom. They're also both characters with interesting emotional conflicts. Solid close #2 behind Sigper.

9. Sigma x Se//l f In //s//ert: CAN YOU ALL STOP MAKING THEM ALL WAIFISH LITTLE 18 YEAR OLD GIRLS TO SHIP WITH THIS 62 YEAR OLD MAN? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE?

10. Sigma x Z en//yatt//a: It's okay, I suppose. Not really super exciting, and definitely far behind any other Zen ships. Most of it's just him being a therapist, which isn’t my flavour.

Anyway that, uh... about sums it up. Enjoy, I suppose? Feel free to send more asks about this if you want, but I really don’t want to get in any fights.

[instafuck]

ppl who say nge was a mindfuck and the last few eps are incomprehensible like specifically anime dudebros need to shut the fuck up LOL like idk i got it, they kind of literally spell it out... the point is the questions its asking, its just. what its like to experience confronting that stuff and growing up like it covers sexual trauma, abandonment, puberty, and emotional abuse (specifically from parents) like its not the deep of a read :|

[frogcoded]

so. lucifer new season huh

[spice-ghouls]

bnha au where bakugou actually gets real character development and owns up to how his actions affect others

[annabelle--cane]

most of the takes i see about fandom being trash rase more questions about why these people hang around fans that infuriate them than anything. Like I've been both online and in fandom for a solid 15 years and a) it is not that hard to avoid people who are obnoxious even from the Big Corporate fandoms especially if you don't spend your free time swinging a bat at hornets nests recreationally and b) if you don't wanna engage in fandom stuff for like greek mythology or classic lit or whatever you can just... not do that... it is extremely easy to find communities that will treat serious work seriously

legitimately, I see lines like "fandom makes people try to fit all fiction into omegaverse coffee shop aus" and I'm like. well first of all everyone in my corner of fandom is actually trying to make characters fit into intricately world-built high fantasy epics based on mildly obscure folklore so your experiences are NOT universal. maybe follow some new people idk.

[fitzefitcher]

you see content that kind of just. Shits on people for having interests if they even Slightly veer too close to Cringe InterestsTM, for whatever arbitrary reason, and it just reeks of “lmao if you get mad at this you’re boring you’re a freak go outside and touch grass lmao get better soon <3” like girl. my brother in christ . you’re the one that took time out of your day to swing a bat at the Cringe InterestsTM hornets’ nest and then had the gall to go “lmao u mad???” when the hornets came out

Idk I’m just at a point where people being needlessly mean about just. The mere Concept of Having Interests that are <3UghCringeTM just isn’t that funny? like for a group of people that largely claim to have been bullied/ostracized when growing up and are still now or whatever, y’all seem awfully fucking eager to be bullies yourselves.

like. did you have nothing better to do than to let the shit you think is CringeTM live rent free in your head? maybe u should <3 lmao go outside babe.

[twice-as-many-stars]

Okay so I really don't wanna swing a bat at a hornet's nest, and I'm not entirely sure where I stand on this, but. Something that confuses me to no end about the transandrophobia/transmisandry/whatever debate is that I absolutely agree w anyone who says it's a silly term bc "misandry" or "man hate" or whatever is not an axis of oppression in and of itself, and so it shouldn't be insinuated that we're talking about an issue of intersectional oppression like w transmisogyny, I do feel like it would make sense to have a word for the sort of oppression faced by transmasc ppl but not typically transfem ppl? Not bc it's special or more oppressive or whatever, but bc I feel that by labelling an experience that is particular to a specific type of transness as "just" transphobia makes it impossible to speak about this issue without pretending that it's a potentially universal experience of all who are trans, which would mean erasing transfem and transneutral ppl and treating transmasc ppl as a standard. That feels icky.

And there are specific experiences made by transmascs that they/we make (I suppose I am effectively transmasc?) that are explicitly made because of being transmasc. Or, well, because of transitioning as an afab or cafab person. (I want to clarify that I know that not all transmasc ppl are necessarily afab/cafab, this is another layer of invisibility within the trans community that makes me think...)

On the other hand, I do wonder it it makes sense to split trans experiences up like this, even if I do realize that I'd like to be able to talk about invisibility, about the specific medical issues that we face, about the specific combination of misogyny and transphobia that we face when we're clocked and that, in my experience, differs from transmisogyny in some critical aspects, I would like to create a space to talk about that without framing it as an issue of intersectionality (the only thing that intersects here is being trans and most of the time afab, which, I don't think I'd like to describe the actual struggle we face along the lines of assigned gender), and without taking away from other trans communities, and without creating yet another rift within the trans community at large. Much like how I think, but it's not my place to start a debate about this (and maybe I even missed it?), there should be terms to describe the intersection of transphobia and racism... but maybe there doesn't need to be a word for everything? This is all confusing and not very well thought out, pls bear with me