#me; closeted any pronouns user; ''well actually…''

[keclan]

bosses discussing getting a backup babysitter for when i’m busy, and they’re thinking of asking the teaching assistant at baby’s school, and, not a factor in consideration but a separate point of this conversation, they don’t know this person’s gender, and it was highly enjoyable watching them (two well meaning cishet liberal people) discuss what this person’s pronouns could be and how to respectfully find out. also this person sounds rad as fuck and i would like to be their friend.

[whysojiminimnida]

OH MY GOD CALM DOWN JEEZ

People still losing their shit over this

and with good reason I might add, I have spoken on it already *coughbetweenroundscough* but the naysayers are saying NAY very horsily, more like "neigh loud enough and it won't be true" which: points for the coping mechanism, denial is a powerful tool, use it as needed but REALLY? At some point it's gotta be sinking in.

"BUT HE WAS IN BUSAN"

No shit, Sherlock. Y'all act like he wasn't there for Jimin's Live and a train can't get to Busan in four hours. Trust and believe that it can. It's 2:15 on the high speed rail that is usually closed at that time of night unless you're BTS. But even if he went earlier...

... you can be assured that the jeonparkery was going, is going, will go and already done went DOWN.

It went down so hard that the hyung of all hyungs had to address it:

I love Korean and its lack of reasoned pronouns. He meant "everyone will think we're on bad terms but none of us are because we're all cool. So cool."

MEETINGS HAVE BEEN HELD. This has been a Topic Of Meetings. ARMY opinions, "anti-shipper" and TKK opinions are considered Valuable Factors for marketing because of their dollar signs, and it was addressed as recently as yesterday. Totally unrelated, traveling separately is a great way to deflect suspicion and enhance security, not that anyone would think otherwise. ANYWAY.

THEY READ US. BTS READS US. They do. I cannot tell you how many times I've been told "Yeah so Hobah says ARMY's on their bullshit again", like.... Y'ALL. I HEAR THIS WEEKLY. And in case the bajillion posts didn't clue you in, Hoseok hangs with Jimin almost daily. They are close in a way that, I hate to even say it, Taehyung and Jimin are not. Not anymore.

He did post though.

I mean he didn't say "bro" or anything so it isn't romantic but... don't get any crazy ideas, they're fine. They're just fine, fine, fine. Sing it with me, they're fiiiine... kinda. I'm actually addressing the maknae line in a series that may have to take a back seat to Busan this week. The lines at Magnate are OUT THE DOOR (photo stolen from twt user pjmdata who is there, unlike me but very like Kev and X)

And naturally some elements just have to go and step on normal human boundaries and insert themselves into every situation:

It's not as big a deal as it looks. Kev saw it and says it's actually one of those oversized poster-type digital ads in a station, people sneeze as they walk past it and don't even look because the rest of Busan is rightfully INSANE, lining up at the Jeon Park Tribute Wall and everything. I'm told it's an entire Jiminfest over there right now. That's gotta be chapping some asses.

So, listen. The Jeon-Parks are doing well. Happy, as much as any closeted gay couple in a massive media frenzy can be. It's not easy spending years of your twenties dodging the press and the cameras and the fans you love so you don't get outed. Jungkook in particular, never a lie-down-and-take-it kind of guy (ahem, as far as we know), is having a rough time with the Golden Closet. Films or no films. Maybe personal films, I'm not judging.

It's a beautiful sunny day in FloriDUH and I'm off to see my only daughter for the first time in a solid year so cut me a break, willya, I'll update as I have the inclination but yeah. I think we may have a coming out before I expected it. We'll see. I LOVE YOU GUYS, LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOUUUUUU /rosebowl /fireworks

I'm out. Carry on.

[fridgeful-o-help]

thank you if you can answer my questions, hopefully all 5 parts went through, and sorry that it ended up being kind of long and rambly. i really appreciate the way you answer people and thought you'd be able to provide some good insight which is why i wanted to hear your opinions if that's okay. thanks so much again, i really do appreciate any advice, and i hope you're doing well and having a good day or night. take care for now!

HI NONNIE! I GOT ALL YOUR ASKS AND ILL DO MY BEST TO AWNSER EVERYTHING I CAN. I DO TRY MY BEST TO BE HELPFUL, AND IM GLAD YOU THINK IM GOOD AT IT.

I HOPE THIS HELPS BUT IM VERY LONG-WINDED TODAY APPERENTLY

NOW, TO BEGIN. TYPICALLY WHEN ARGUING FOR NEOPRONOUNS AGAINST THE ARGUMENT YOU HAVE BEEN PRESENTED YOU HAVE TO GO FOR MORE... WHAT THE DIFFERENCE IS BETWEEN ASKING PEOPLE TO CALL YOU A SLUR OR WITH "BLMSELF" IS THAT THOSE THINGS CAUSE ACTUAL HARM TO OTHER PEOPLE. THERES ALSO THAT THERE ISNT ANYTHING WRONG WITH PIZZASELF, IT JUST SORT OF? SOUNDS SILLY? ITS NOT HURTING ANYONE, AND THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A LITTLE SILLY IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL HAPPY AND COMFORTABLE. A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO HATE NOUNSELF ARE GOING OFF THE BASE REACTION THAT ITS SILLY/DUMB SO ID KEEP THAT IN MIND. (FYI IF YOU GO BY PIZZASELF YOURE AWESOME. YOU DONT DESERVE ANY FLACK YOU GET FOR DOING SO AND KEEP BEING YOU BECAUSE YOURE COOL! 8}) BUT YES I AGREE, MOST IF NOT ALL PEOPLE WITH THAT ARGUMENT DO NOT USE NEOPRONOUNS THEMSELVES.

PLEASE REMEMBER THOUGH THAT IF IT WAS UNINETIONAL WHEN YOU INVALIDATE SOMEONE IT WAS AN ACCIDENT AND MISTAKE, AND YOU WILL MOST LIKELY BE FORGIVEN. WE ALL DO AT SOME POINT OR ANOTHER AND I PROMISE IT DOES NOT MAKE YOU A BAD PERSON.

COMING FROM THAT, THERE IS A VERY SIZABLE CHUNK OF NOUNSELF USERS WHO ARE LEGITAMATE AT LEAST THE LEAST, FROM MY PERSONAL OBSERVATION. A PATTERN I THINK IVE NOTICED IN (A PORTION OF) THE PEOPLE WHO I KNOW 100% ARE SINCERE IS USUALLY PEOPLE WILL SELECT NOUN PRONOUNS BASED ON HOW THEY FEEL ABOUT THEMSELVES? FOR THEM ITS DONE AS PART OF GENDER PERFORMANCE TO INVOKE A CERTAIN FEELING, LIKE SOMEONE WHO FEELS VERY CUTESY MIGHT GO FOR BUN/BUNS FOR EXAMPLE. ITS NOT ALWAYS THAT WAY THOUGH.

SORRY I GOT OFF TRACK. ANYWAYS, NOUNSELF TROLLS ARE SOMEWHAT DIFFICULT TO SPOT DUE TO IT BEING WELL. HARD TO MAKE A "PARODY" OF, REALLY. WITH NON-NOUNSELF ID JUST CHECK PRONOUNCIATIONS AND SUCH BEFORE PROCEEDING. FOR THE MOST PART THOUGH I WOULD TRY TO HANDLE YOUR FEARS AS BEST AS POSSIBLE? INSTANCES OF TROLLING LIKE THAT BLOW UP BECAUSE THEY ARE SCARY AND GENERATE CLICKS, THAT DOESNT MEAN THAT THEYRE COMMON NOR UNIVERSAL. IF IT CONTINUES TO BOTHER YOU ID SUGGEST DOING SOMETHING I LEARNED IN THERAPY CALLED A BELIEF EXPERIMENT (DOING A SMALLER, ACHIVABLE ACTION TO ATTEMPT TO PROVE OR DISPROVE WORRIED/ANXIOUS THOUGHTS. ID USUALLY DO THIS WITH A SUPPORTIVE FRIEND TO HAVE YOUR BACK OR SOMETHING OF THAT SORT)

GENERALLY IF YOU THINK YOUR FRIENDS WOULD FIND IT ODD BUT WOULD STILL BE RELITIVELY ACCEPTING ID TREAT IT LIKE A NORMAL COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET WITH A FEW EXTRA STEPS. ID USUALLY SUGGEST TELLING YOUR FRIENDS PERSONALLY BEFORE UPDATING YOUR SOCIALS, BUT THATS UP TO YOU. ID ALSO GO WITH ANY TRANS FRIENDS YOU HAVE FIRST IF THATS AN OPTION, BECAUSE USUALLY ITS EASIER TO EXPLAIN HOW YOU FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE WITH NEOS IN THAT SITUATION. IT MIGHT SUCK BUT ID SUGGEST THAT WHEN/IF THEY ARE MILDLY INSENSITIVE JUST EXPLAIN THAT IT BOTHERED YOU AND WHY, HOPEFULLY THEYLL GET IT.

TYPICALLY MY RESPONSE TO SOMEONE BEING RUDE TO ME IS NOT... IDEAL SO I DONT KNOW HOW TO ADVISE YOU ON THAT, BUT GENERALLY YOU DONT HAVE TO DEFEND THE FACT YOU EXIST IF YOURE NOT UP FOR IT. USE THE BLOCK BUTTON AS LIBERALLY AS YOU LIKE, ITS A DEFENCE IN ITS OWN RIGHT.

THATS ALL, I THINK. YOUR MESSAGES COPY-PASTED WILL BE UNDER THE CUT, FORGIVE ME IF I MISSED SOMETHING, I DO HAVE A DISORDER THAT MAKES IT SLIGHTLY DIFFICULT FOR ME TO READ. FEEL FREE TO SUBMIT ANY FURTHER QUESTIONS, COMMENTS ETC AND DO TELL ME IF I DID MISS SOMETHING YOU STILL NEED HELP WITH .

MESSAGES AS FOLLOWS, WITH SEPERATIONS REMOVED:

so i've been using neopronouns for less than a week and every day since i started, i've been getting negative reactions. the negativity comes from strangers, so it doesn't hurt me as personally as if friends were doing this (i actually haven't said anything to my friends about my neopronouns yet). anyhow, when people try to argue with me, i tell them that i don't see why they can't be respectful and call someone whatever makes them feel happy and comfortable. one reaction i got was "just because something makes someone happy doesn't make it valid" and compared it to letting someone drink poison if drinking poison is what makes them happy. then i get a lot of people who bring up stuff like "but what if the pronouns that make me feel valid contain a slur? / what if i use pizzaself? / what if i only go by BLMself pronouns? you'd be invalidating me!!!" and they try to use my own words against me since i've previously said "even if you don't understand it you should call people by what makes them feel valid." i know these people don't even use neopronouns to begin with but tbh it still does start to make me feel guilty? i'm nd and i can't always pick up social cues or sarcasm so i would feel horrible if i did unwillingly invalidate someone. but i'm also kind of paranoid because so much trolling has been going around recently like one video where someone tricked another person into using neopronouns that sounded like a slur when said out loud, recorded it, and put it online. i don't always know who is being sincere and who wants to trick people, particularly with nounself pronouns, like the pizzaself thing. finally, i wanted to go back to the topic of not telling my friends about my neopronouns yet. i feel like if i just start to put my neopronouns on profiles that my friends can view, it'll seem odd to them that i never said anything before, but i also don't know how to bring up in a personal conversation "i found out about some neopronouns i like and i've started using them" without it being awkward. i don't think my friends would make fun of me but i do think they'd find neopronouns 'weird' in general and maybe act kind of insensitive without meaning to, like not getting it. how would you react to the rude ppl? i know i could ignore them but i feel like they take that as them 'winning' or me running out of ways to defend my point of view. and how would you have your friends find out about about you wanting to use neopronouns?

[tiphansia]

long and negative post under the cut that’s just a giant wall of text with no breaks lmao

ah lads now i’ve really done it, accidentally left myself unmuted in the voice chat of a discord server of online friends to whom I never said a word about being trans. In fact I lied about it, when asked earlier I said I was a cis dude. I even played up being a little homophobic/transphobic as a joke to reinforce the perception of cis-ness. But now they’ve found out I’m actually trans which is the most wildly humiliating thing that could happen to me on there. This sucks ahah god now they’re going to think of me differently and accidentally misgender me sometimes like they do with the other trans people in the server which i don’t mind in principle but the big problem is that it means they aren’t perceiving me as male anymore which. Really sucks. God it’s really my fault for lying to them but all I wanted was to be treated as normal. That’s not a crime, right? All I wanted was to be one of them and not a weird outsider like how they treat the other trans dudes. I feel like I’ve betrayed my own kind in some way. I even have an irrational hatred towards everyone who heard me, which is completely stupid given that it’s my fault for leaving myself unmuted. I wish they would hate me because it would make me feel a lot better if they did, but no one is mad at me and it’s making me feel sick. Hmm. Privileged problems, right? I know people out there have it worse than me and that I don’t even deserve to feel sad about this because nothing bad has ever happened to me in my entire life but still. I can’t help but be sad, and it makes me feel better to post this into the unfeeling void. Might get hate for this, but I really wish conversion therapy actually worked and was legal, I’d be the first in line to sign myself up. To me, the thought of becoming a woman makes me absolutely scared and sick, and therefore I am scared of conversion therapy in this hypothetical scenario, but just like dying, once it’s over I won’t care anymore. So it’s the most logical thing to wish for out of all my stupid fantasies, even though it’s the most painful one. My other fantasy is to go back in time and mess with my dna so that I’d grow up a cis boy, but of course that’s impossible. I once saw a post about how any religion that touts the idea of suffering as a virtue is one to be wary of, but I subscribe to that idea myself. Even though I don’t really have much real pain in my life since it’s not like being trans is actually the worst thing in the world (to me it is the ultimate shame), the idea that my being trans (very minor pain compared to others I know) is somehow a test of my character comforts me. I don’t know what scares me more, the fact that I’ll be like this my entire life, or the idea that it’s temporary, I’ll detransition, and all this pain was just made up for nothing. I also don’t believe in god logically, but whenever I’m in pain it’s comforting to think that there’s someone I can talk to, even if no one is actually listening. I think the most use that could come out of my life would be as a murder victim of a trans hate crime, so people can use my death to advance the cause. At least I’d be doing something useful for once. I think I’d make a fine martyr, too. I feel subhuman a lot of times, like everyone around me is looking at me and speaking to me without noticing that I’m a cursed and rotten creature to be crushed under their shoes. I almost wish people would hate me more so I wouldn’t feel like such a liar all the time, even though really I’m not lying about anything. I feel though that even by attempting to pass as male, I’m deceiving people. I’m a man inside I know but it’s so hard to even say the words or even think them because of this stupid shell of perception. I look and sound like Minnie mouse, anyone I told would burst out laughing if I told them: “I’m a man.” God, it even sounds so stupid here. I get by by presenting as ambiguously as possible, and saying nothing about pronouns unless directly asked. I’m such a pussy, not strong enough to stay female-presenting, too weak to correct pronouns and perception, and not even man enough to kill myself when I should have. It’s been 3 or 4 years since I was severely suicidal, and still I think life would not have changed for those around me if I had died then. I still wish I’d killed myself then, or at least tried. It’s kind of my life motto at this point: “Too pussy to do anything”. Even now as the grand landmark age of 18 draws near, all the hopes I placed on it in years past are evaporating. I told myself, “When we’re 18 we can get on hormones, we can change are name, we can finally live a full life”. And now, life’s realities are becoming clear. Transition with what money? And how are we going to deal with the family? I’d rather die than come out, but I’d also rather die than not transition. Real sticky situation we got here. Looks like I won’t be able to transition until my late 20s, which is horrifyingly far away to me. I thought I couldn’t make it until 18, but here I (almost) am. I know I can make it until then, but it makes me so unbelievably sad, and I can already imagine the amount of suffering in my future between now and then. Plus, I was on track to have a beautiful and privileged life. Was a 4.0 student, in multiple honors societies, great standardized test scores, the works. Now I’m none of that except the test scores  due to me being a dumb piece of shit this entire school year and letting my half a decade of hard work swirl down the drain along with my life prospects. Hell, it’s starting to look like I’m gonna be a highschool dropout. Me! It’s unthinkable. I’m gonna end up working in retail or at mcdonalds or something and while all work is honorable work, I’m not going to be making enough to fucking live off of, much less transition. I was set up for greatness, man. I let everyone down cause. Well, I don’t even know what happened,w as probably depressed or something but I can’t remember most of this entire school year so I’m not sure. Being trans ruined everything for me. I wouldn’t have ever even been depressed if I wasn’t trans. I’d be in the qualifying race for the cross country junior olympics if it wasn’t for being trans. To be honest I miss track, but guess what! You’re trans, no sex-segregated sports for you. You either have to come out and do sports with your chosen gender, or stay closeted to your parents and out yourself as a tranny to your entire fucking high school. I mean sure the whole world’s probably thinking, “Boo fucking hoo tumblr user tiphansia, let me play you a song on the world’s tiniest violin, those are first world problems” and yeah they certainly are but it doesn’t make it any less upsetting to me. Just let me have my little pity party in my little corner of the internet. I miss my online friends. Normally my response to anything painful that has to do with my being trans is just denial denial denial until even I forget the event, but I’m pretty sure my brain can’t take any more forgetting. I’ve forgotten this entire year I can’t do this anymore. I have to be strong and face it and stop being a pussy. I hope it turns out well for me. and for whoever made it this far reading hope your life goes well too. Thanks for listening. Goodnight.

[eucanyon]

         ·ﾟ☀  i am so hype to be here nobody gets it and even MORE hype to be bringing my baby boy canyon ....... i already can feel that everyone is absolute chef’s kiss and i cant WAIT to plot w u all ! my name is 𝐭𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐲 , utilizing she / her pronouns and knowing nothing about percy jackson but trying my absolute best . i do prefer dis.cord for plotting so if you’d like to swap users that’d be grand , without further delay ( i googled if it was ado or adieu but apparently it’s all wrong throw the whole phrase away ) below the cut you can read a bit about canyon ! 

             ⟨ MASON GOODING. CIS MAN. HE / HIM. ⟩ though the mist might prevent some from seeing it, 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐘𝐎𝐍 𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐒 is actually a descendent of ZEUS. it’s still a question of whether or not the TWENTY - TWO year old PRE-LAW from CHICAGO, USA has taken after their godly parent completely, but the demigod is still known to be quite 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 & 𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐄 .

 — 𝐁𝐈𝐎 .

              ‘ you gotta work twice as hard to be half as good .                           you gotta be twice as good to get half the recognition . ’

it’s the earliest phrase he remembers hearing . his grandparents , a duo running the local church services just a block away from their chicago inner city apartment , fill the shoes left by a mother who left her wedlock-born son in the hands of people more capable than she and a father nobody had ever met . his clothes come from the church donation bin and his toys are hand-me-downs from neighborhood kids outgrowing their phases . he pays for football like most of the boys on his team , camped out in front of grocery stores and shopping malls with a bell and a collection bucket with a nervous spiel of “ please help us earn new pads for our football team ” spewing from each child the moment they make eye contact with anyone sympathetic enough to turn their way .

canyon’s held to a higher standard than the neighborhood kids . he comes home before it even starts to turn dark , he has a closet full of perfectly ironed shirts that he tucks neatly into his waistline every sunday morning , he calls anyone that even looks a few years older than him sir or ma’am . he spends afternoons in a rigid schedule : help grandma cook and clean , football practice , homework , and a half hour of television before bed . he gets a choice , if he wants to invite the neighbor’s kids over for that sliver of free time , or keep it to himself . it was a source of embarrassment for him at first , to have a bedtime matching that of his elderly caretakers , but after a certain point , it becomes a source of pride for canyon — he’s lauded by teachers and coaches alike as the best behaved and most respectful ( albeit , also the quietest ) boy of any group he inhabits .  

he struggles in school at first , and not simply in the social element . his teachers express concern by his absolute silence , but given that he answers questions and doesn’t cause any issues for them , concerns are brushed off . his handwriting leaves much to be desired and his literacy skills are behind his grade expectations , but he excels when offered oral options for responses and follows logic like a champ . though his grandparents can’t quiet afford a formal tutor , but his teachers offer a bit of informal help in the often time that his grandparents run late to pick him up . they note to his grandmother that canyon is a workhorse , putting in much more work than what is asked for and seeing a steady improvement in his grades due to this . she’ll smile , and canyon will repeat their mantra in his head on the way home .

his mom appears every few months over major holidays , bag of trinkets in tow . canyon quickly learns that ignoring the toys means she’ll talk more to him than about him to his grandparents as if he’s not there , curling up in her lap like a cat vying for her attention . he shoves straight - a report cards and mvp trophies into her hands as long as he can remember , one thanksgiving she comments on his hair getting too long and by christmas he’s gotten it shaved clean . every comment she makes he squeezes for some semblance of recognition , a baby bird screaming out to a blinded parent :    ‘ see me , i’m here . see me , if only this once . ’

his father is a forbidden topic in the house and his mother skirts around conversations of him , which bothers canyon , but his community is that of a village - raising mindset . older brothers become mentor figures , uncles become surrogate fathers , grandfathers pass down tokens of wisdom . it seems no household is truly ever without the nurture of a parent figure , and canyon grows up acutely aware of how lucky he has it in his little apartment complex telling the story to himself every night : a mother who loved him enough to give him the life he deserved , a father clearly not worthy of being in the picture . canyon , a boy with the bare minimum , sees it as more than enough .

a pudgy , quiet child following a robotic schedule doesn’t quite inspire the vision of a progeny to the king of the gods . canyon’s only friends are the ones he’s grown up with and the cousins subbing in as the siblings he was never given , his grandmother being perhaps the first person he tells anything to . but he can’t bring himself to open up when his mother begrudgingly confides a secret in him , taking him out for ice cream as an early birthday gift . he has half a mind to let his grandma know she showed up to her visit under the influence , high off whatever would make her deranged enough to tell canyon his father is a shapeshifting greek god who will be reaching out to him to hone his powers in a few days — but he quickly realizes that snitching would mean even less time spent with a mother who already only sees him in minimal increments . as with everything in life , he keeps it to himself , a move that would pay off when he’s approached by perhaps the most terrifyingly imposing man he’s seen in his life at a church service the day before his birthday .

his father is , despite all the obvious flaws , perhaps everything canyon has dreamed of becoming . they talk briefly during the service and make official introductions before he escapes into the day , promising to return and explain more in time . and he does . canyon’s sure to keep to himself who he’s quietly chatting with in the back pews every sunday , but he and his father talk at length in the relative secrecy of hushed voices in a boisterous sermon . the man doesn’t explain much about how he met canyon’s mother , nor what he does in general , but fills in all the gaps left by his mother’s erratic attempt at a conversation . the man buys canyon a new set of cleats for his birthday and notes to him that he can continue to fill in the gaps if he considers spending his summers away . he’ll make it happen , canyon simply has to agree .

and he does . his grandparents are less than thrilled to think that he’ll be away from them for three months and the fact that he’s making a lot of these details up as he goes nearly gets him caught , but his father helps him conceive a ruse so convincing , they’ll be able to leave his grandparents out of the whole demigod conversation .

and it seems almost as soon as he had found something resembling the parents he so longed for , they leave him perhaps more alone than before . his mother is jailed for a sequence of bad decisions and zeus makes himself a figure less and less , eventually becoming clear to canyon that he too will skirt along with the bare minimum , claiming him at 13 and tapering off the effort he exerts as canyon begins to make a name for himself throughout the american demigod scene . his camp friends ask if he’s planning to attend eonia and canyon makes it clear that he refuses , a full ride scholarship to howard university the only thing in his sights for the future . he wants to detach himself from the culture being force down his throat by these demigod hypocrites , he wants to be adamant in his pride over being a black american fighting for change .

a change of heart comes perhaps on a whim . his father makes an offhand comment about “ what a shame ” it is that canyon doesn’t see himself as cut out for demigod school . the boy , now every bit a young man after his growth spurts leave him at an imposing 6’3 and football shapes his body into a vessel of solid muscle , commands the energy of every group he’s thrust into , a pillar of his community and recognized as the one who will bring their neighborhood into greatness . driven , intelligent , and powerful , canyon grows into his role as the champion , and it becomes apparent that his father wants to push the vision of his own contribution forward where it counts , and canyon — the one born into nothing , wants to grow into something .

eonia welcomes him with open arms and before he even opens his mouth , it’s apparent that he carries himself like the son of a king : though he is quick to distance himself from his father who he had once so - idolized . in his head , he sets out to become something notable without the need to precede himself with his father’s name ; canyon is a force of nature all by his own creation , and he refuses to credit his own well - earned accomplishments to a father who was hardly that . he plans to use eonia to close the demigod chapter in his life , hoping he can hone his powers enough to then never use them , hoping to remain solely involved in the mortal world with no mind given to the demigods’ drama . he plans to attend law school directly upon graduating and become the next spearhead of a political movement with the goal of true justice for all disenfranchised people in mind .

 — 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘 .

 canyon ellis has made a name for himself despite his relative silence , a reputation preceding him even without the influence of his godly father’s name behind him . if anything , canyon represents what the ancient greeks perhaps idolized zeus to be — minus the hedonism that brought upon so much of the chaos plaguing his tales . a boy brought into the bare minimum becomes a man making due with the bare minimum , and canyon is known for a rhetoric that can prove a point out of anything . he’s an introvert in extrovert’s shoes , often spotted around teammates or other members of his clubs though he’s oft the last to say a word , choosing instead to observe in silence with those intense stares he’s become so well - known for . intimidating is perhaps an understatement when you pair his stature with his energy , the strength in his reservation and the discipline in his blood , standing tall and unwavering in his beliefs . he speaks with intention and though he’s most known for his serious side , he carries himself with a humble confidence that allows him to speak his truth with ease and stand up for what he believes in most , unafraid to call out those on the other end of his remarks . though he’s stern and admittedly reserved , he’s not shy , and pushes himself to reach beyond his areas of comfort in order to truly live up to the expectations he places on himself : expectations that are perhaps too high for him to realistically achieve in this lifetime .

though intense , canyon has a soft spot for those closest to him and though he won’t be the one stirring up the entertainment , he’s often biting back a smile at the antics of his loved ones , one of his catch phrases being “ i get the joke , i’m just not laughing because it’s not funny , ” followed by a pat on the head . he’s stern but not entirely humorless , kind but no - nonsense , and tends to hold himself to a certain standard of seriousness in most circumstances . he’ll let loose on the occasional night out , but there’s a sense of tension to him that seems clearly prepared to leap back into his leader shoes and fix whatever disaster may present itself . a projection of strength , poise , and dignity , canyon’s aptitude for leadership is equally his greatest strength and his biggest weakness , imbuing him with a moral compass and a sense of empathy that sometimes makes the world too black and white for him , refusing to see any circumstances that may complicate or excuse something .

his views on loyalty are severe and have left him with a handful of people he’s all but erased from his life , burning bridges without second thought though many in his circle advise him to reconsider . there’s right , and there’s wrong in his world , with nothing in between despite the fact that sometimes , there isn’t as clear cut of an answer as he claims there to be .

pair this with the trauma of his abandonments during the upbringing he faced and it comes together to result in a boy walking in a man’s shoes , fingernails digging into palms with the fever of all the words he bites back , fueled by a crusade for justice to give him some sense of worth — perhaps the only thing holding him together at this point .

— 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂 .

AESTHETIC : uphill runs fueled by answer by tyler the creator blaring through your headphones , the perfectionism of a virgo and tenacity of a taurus , falling asleep to the swan by camille saint saens , vision obscured by hot tears , the flex of your jaw as you bite back a comment , the unsettling rumble in the air just before the strike of thunder , kendrick lamar blasting from your classic mustang , picking up the pieces of a shattered porcelain bust , the primal sense of connection in a team huddle , thunderous pounding of your pulse in your ears , being voted “ most likely to become president , ” a wide stance with arms crossed over your chest , power drawn from unity , never division .

my inspos for him were chiron / black from moonlight , erik killmonger from black panther , and batman lmao . i guess maybe some steve rogers ? 

he’s the captain of the rugby team !

grew up playing football but the moment he casually played a rugby match at camp and interlocked into a scrum was the moment he was forever converted and has loved the sport ever since . he plays as a lock .

as a pre - law student , he’s in mock trial , as well as in the social justice collective . he is vice president of the black student collective and is an active and passionate member who is outspoken about black identity on campus

[joseyfeli1-blog]

This is it. Halloween 2017

So this Halloween (sadly) i will not dress up. But i will strip down, Ayyyyy!!

alright back to business. Sexuality, Identity, and least important of this bunch, Biological Sex.

This post is for my blog and to be written down. I am still closeted, which i only will tell people that i believe will not care so much about this info. Serisouly in my life, it isnt a huge thing for me.

So it has come to me, throughout this year i really shouldn’t say i am cisgender, and heterosexual. And for me that was strange for me to be so okay with. Yet it wasn’t of how accepting and how much i love myself. No. it is truly cause i knew i wasn’t but never went to go check up the lgbt+ shit, and didn’t care about this stuff. But here i am, caring about myself (how do i feel about that? ehh). Sexuality was never something i cared to bring up/talk about, but Senior year (high school) and im just realizing that from past experiences that, yeah, it is more complicated than - hetero, cis. Yeah no, mostly all my lifes explanations are paragraphs, or essays. long story short, This post is really not for the people who would support me (though Thank You so much) and also not for me to accept me. Again I never cared for my sexuality and i still dont, but since i might get asked, and i would like an straight(Hah!) answer.Okay so here it is…

Identity

A big thing this is. Most explanation will be put into this (not for people to believe me, just so its written somewhere). I want to be identifyed as Genderfluid, three genders, Male, Female, and Non-Binary. For friends on here, dont worry im fine with the pronouns and or whatever you all me. I enjoy no remembering that im biologically male, but i understand people wont care for me in the future. Plus about 17 years of it, kind of numbs you to caring about the pronoun game. So why identify as genderfluid and not be cisgendered? Well for me i am self aware that i depreciate myself (all the fucking time) and some part of it was, so i mustnt hate myself enough to realise i should accept the idea of me being identified as the other two genders. So i thought about, i hate most masculine shit. feminine shit? Love a lot of it! Shit with no gender?  Cool as fuck. So why be filtered Josey? why not embrace this threepeice mofo? 

Why do i believe myself to be these genders?/ Why identify as them?

picture a triple Venn diagram please? Male, Female, Non-Binary.

Why male? i WILL NOT degrade the beauty of the other two genders to have me as a full addition. (self-depreciation, i know, again self aware af) 

Why Female? They all are strong as H E L L! to be apart of them, thats a nice thought. Plus ive had a front row seat of how most common men act towards women and i will not be apart of those asses(i am a different kind of asshole, but that is for another post, not the time right now) I never liked the way how most people talk about how lesbians are only hot and the they are sexualized, THEN! when they bring it up! everyone calls them crazy and disregards the actions of sexualizing women loving women.

Why Non-Binary? They have no need for being either common gender, Awesome! in my opinion. The fact that i never cared for my gender  through my young life, speaks out to me, not loudly, but i know i barely care for the thing in between my pants, regardless my bio sex. In fact, i wont have memories of me being called specific pronouns and shit where i feel nostalgia over them, you wanna know why? Cause i dont remember being called a boy and enjoying it! i just remember having a great time with video games or walking around the houses ive been in.

Seriously days go by without me acknowledging that im male, so in my opinion no it doesn’t matter to me what people think of me, nor if they will support my identifications. Hence, Genderfluid, not trans, not just Non-binary. But three halves, to make a whole.

Sexuality

Alright the simpler part of this post. So when growing up, media, my family, myself, just thought it was okay for making me believe that: Yes! i am hetero! i like women! and it is okay how many are being degraded!

took me a second, but luckily i do not think that at all anymore. (for people that are going to argue me, realize that: too bad if im wrong! i aint changing this post for you!) Now sadily it took me tim eto notice how heteros i knew/ know think its fine how they think so lowly of the people they find sexually attractive, but opinions opinions! so i digress.

I am DemiPansexual (and probs demiromantic, not the time to figure that shit out yet.;p)

Demisexual- Part of the Ace spectrum, you are sexually attracted to no one other than people you have created such powerful bonds with, the immensity or lack of strong bond is obviously individual preference.

Pansexual- People sexually attracted to people whom are themselves as much as possible. See People, we dont care for biological sex, identity, or sexual orientation of whomever we feel attracted to sexually. Again personal reference is what you are looking towards other people (or yourself? who nows? some freaky narcissistics out there, @rapforeminem im looking at You!:p). For me, people being themselves the most, and me seeing them sexually attractive because of it- That (again for me) is someone living their life where they cant stop learning themselves and aspiring to be themselves as we all know, we gonna die soon. the fact is (in my opinion), People dont change, they adapt and grow. They become what their soul is. i believe that souls know what we will become, hopes that we discover all 100% of ourselves, i pray to know all of me, but im also scared, so i will not try to really go out for the answer, if it happens, it happens, and cool too. To see someone be themselves and embrace it, brightens my mood. seeing their bright eyes, makes me bite my lip (like a loser and/or fangirl, lol), it makes me feel good/ special to be there for it. it is special and sweet. anyhow, i hate seeing people as sexual objects, i know i very much did before, but for me, it was normalized! for me! i am justifying me right now, im justifying when i didn’t know that was not how i like to think and act.

DemiPansexual- So why use both? Well, i shouldn’t call myself/ use the ace spectrum to use for myself, again big respect for each one of them, because  i have seen people that i didn’t have/ picture of having a profound bond with. And I love the soul of others, they’re so pretty! Especially when they are really unfiltered.

now because i am pansexual, doesn’t mean i have to seek out the entire soul of another to be even a tiny bit sexually attracted to them. That is my opinion. This Whole Fucking post is my god damned opinion, why type and post it? it will give me god damn peace broham. having something written, helps me cope, so in a sense, this helps me be me, acceot myself and my complicated sexuality/identity.

So for people whom talk, or want to talk to me (there is no line for that), and dont know how to talk to me aafter i come out, just notice, i never really talked about myself in these ways before! i never really cared, i am numb to how poeple just saw a straight regular boi. GOD do i wish it was that simple, literally over an hour typing this shit! But of course to end it,

Biological sex

i am boi

Alright that is it! Hahaha, okay so this is going out at 2:00 am in texas time, but 12:00am (Halloween) for westcoast of the united states. ill reblog during the day of Halloween. not to advertise myself, but for people that want a coming out post, and or support me no matter what (thank you again, love you lot) i identify as.

Oh and i understand that there are so many! so many spectrums and other shit, so if you read all this, or just feel like im incorrect and ou are in fact more intelligent in this subject than me and try to tell me “that i am actually something else”, or “there is a better title for you” i wont listen right now, im fucking exhuasted okaying this post as is, ill check on myself and the wikipedia if I feel the need to. And if you do not beileive or disagree with any part of my coming out shtuff, talk to me directly, no need to hurt my supporters, followers, people i follow, random Tumblr users, and especially mutuals( I Love you guys! MWAH!). Message ME that im wrong or dont exist! not the people that had no idea this post was being done! give me your hate! im cool with it! I Will allow it!

Anyway! Happy mother fucking Halloween California! Have a safe and fun one this year! and everywhere else for that matter. 

[fcrtiers-blog]

@gogreekpoints

( &&. general information )

full name: charlotte elizabeth fortier

pronunciation: shar-lot

nickname(s) or alias: charlie, char

preferred name: charlie

current age: twenty-one

astrological sign: sagittarius

element: fire

title: miss

label: the halcyon

gender: female

preferred pronouns: she & her

sexual preference: bisexual

romantic preference: biromantic

resides in: princeton, new jersey

current occupation: student

language(s) spoken: english

native language: english

current marital status: single

( &&. background )

reason behind name: charlotte was her maternal grandmother’s first name and elizabeth is her paternal grandmother’s middle name

birth order: she is the youngest of three siblings

ethnicity: caucasian

nationality: american

religion: agnostic

political views: liberal as fuck

financial status: upper middle class

iq: 127

hometown: georgetown, washington, d.c.

( &&. physical appearance )

looks like: phoebe tonkin

height: five feet and ten inches

weight: a hundred and forty pounds

shoe size: eight and a half

figure/build: lean, slightly muscular

hair colour, Dyed?: brunette and no

hair length: medium length

eye colour: hazel

shape of face: square

tattoos: ‘joy’ in scribe on her wrist. a dainty sternum tattoo of two sprigs of lavender

piercings: ears are triple pierced with her cartilage 

birthmarks/scars/distinguishing marks: n/a

dominant hand: left

if painted, what color are their nails/toenails?: it stays in the gray family, ventures into lavenders sometimes. 

usual style of clothing: hipster skater chic vibes that is most likely hella comfy as well  (lol does that even make sense)

frequently worn jewelry: two personalized rings on her middle finger with her first and middle name on it. a dainty gold necklace with her siblings’ initials on them

what is their speaking style (fast, monotone, loquacious)? insanely loquacious, although there are moments (aka that high life) she’s just insanely mellowed out and talks quite... slow.

describe their scent: she usually smells of citrus???

describe their posture: usually in a slight slouch

( &&. legal information )

birth name: charlotte elizabeth fortier

any speeding tickets?: one from driving in northern virginia (true story. me af. fuck u nova)

have they ever been arrested?: nope

do they have a criminal record?: no

have they committed any violent crimes?: no

property crimes?: no

traffic crimes?: no

( &&. medical information )

blood type: o positive 

date/time of birth: december fifth, 1995 / 2:49 am

place of birth: washington, d.c.

vaginal birth or cesauren section?: vaginal

sex: female

diet: somewhat healthy... not really. hella junk food on occasion

smoker? / Drinker? / Drug User?, Which?: no / yes, socially / yes, mostly marijuana but the occasional psychedelics (shrooms, lsd, etc). 

addictions: none

allergies: none

do they get occasional checkups?: yes

ever broken a bone?: no

hospital visits, what for?: torn acl when used to play soccer in high school

any physical ailments/illnesses/disabilities: none 

any medication regularly taken: none

( &&. personality )

direct quote from them: “wanna go hang on the rooftop?”

positive traits: independent, understanding, charismatic, adventurous 

negative traits: sarcastic, stubborn, hedonistic

likes: naps, fluffy sweaters, corgis, weed

dislikes: sour candies, breadsticks, roller coasters

fears/phobias: heights

hobbies: crocheting (hit up ya girl for hats and scarves in the winter)

guilty pleasure: watching reality tv aka the challenge

regrets: not telling a certain someone that she loved them

turn ons: being dominated, also the being dominant

turn offs: cockiness, little to no hygiene upkeep

lucky number: 13

pet peeves: when people who just ordered move to the front of the counter when there is a large crowd still waiting for their own food??

their motto: here for a good time not a long time

( &&. favourites )

food: pizza

drink: water

fast food restaurant: five guys

flavour: cherry

word: moist

colour: black

clothing: flannels

accessory: rings

candle scent: the winter candle from bath & body works

store: h&m

instrument: guitar

game: any of the pokemon games minus pokemon go

animal: kangaroo

holiday: christmas, duh

season: winter, also duh

book: milk and honey by rupi kaur 

artist: ella mai

band/group: the eagles

song: take it easy by the eagles

movie/film: 

tv show: the challenge (she’s a slut for reality tv tbh)

sport: baseball

sports team: philadelphia phillies 

school subject: maths

possession: her rings that were given to her by her parents

number: 11

emoji: shady eyes emoji

mythological creature: pegasus

person: @gtglayla​

( &&. skills )

talents: does balancing a spoon on your nose count??? or 

ability to drive a car? Operate any other vehicles?: loves driving. will drive if you don’t want to

can they ride a bike?: yes

do they play any sports?: used to play soccer until she tore her acl

anything they’re bad at?: singing and drawing??? 

do they have any combat training? Why?: no, bc no?

( &&. firsts )

childhood memory: being pushed into the pool by her older brother

crush: paisley anderson in the third grade

email address: fluffynutters253@yahoo.com

job: cashier at dairy queen

phone: sidekick

computer: imac

kiss: paisley anderson in the third grade ;)))))) 

love: natalie dent @tfnatalie​

sexual experience: prom in the eleventh grade

( &&. childhood )

best childhood memory?: when she watched her little sister beat up some kid for making fun of her twin. she was going to hold her back, but y’know didn’t want to elbowed in the face

worst childhood memory?: losing her first soccer game. damn, that day was just awful. 

what were they like as a child?: she was really curious, constantly bugging her parents with questions and just won’t stop until she was actually tired. 

any crushes growing up?: several. her first was paisley anderson from the third grade. 

did they know/like their parents?: she absolutely adores her parents

worst influence on them as a kid?: older cousins. they were the ones that taught her what weed was

did they have a lot of friends?: yeah, the girls on her soccer team were her closest friends

were they heavily punished?: not really? her parents were pretty lax about rules.

anything they wish they could cut out?: not really

were they more feminine or masculine?: she was slightly more masculine than feminine

were they an early or late bloomer for puberty?: late bloomer for sure

do they still know any of their childhood friends?: sadly, no

( && this or that )

expensive or inexpensive tastes?: expensive

hygienic or Unhygienic?: hygienic

open-minded or close-minded?: open-minded

introvert or extrovert?: extrovert

optimistic or pessimistic?: optimistic

daredevil or cautious?: daredevil

logical or emotional?: emotional

generous or stingy?: generous

polite or rude?: polite

book smart or street smart?: street smart

dominant or submissive?: dominant

popular or loner?: loner

leader or follower?: leader

day or night person?: night

cat or dog person?: dog

closet door open or closed while sleeping?: closed

( &&. family relationships )

father: peter ynes fortier

describe their relationship: she has a great relationship with her father. honestly between her mother and him, she is closer to her dad. he was the one to feed charlie’s curiosity about the world around her. he was also the one to encourage her to do whatever she loved. 

mother: juniper marie scott-fortier

describe their relationship: she simply adores her mom. she was always there for every soccer game that she had. cheered her on through things that charlie didn’t even know that she needed to be cheered on for. she was always so loving and tender, understanding and kind. 

brother: austin wyatt fortier

describe their relationship: her older brother is somewhat of an asshole?? but he’s the kind of person that would risk anything for his family. quite the character actually. he’s off in new york doing his own thing and making sure that no one is messing with his younger sister. and she basically does the same for him... in a less agressive way. 

sisters: chloe anne and cassandra lee fortier 

describe their relationship: the beloved twins of the family. she would say that they’re pretty close. although, they’re still in high school and sometimes... charlie can’t really relate to them??? teenagers man. 

significant other: tba

( &&. other relationships )

best friend: layla evans

childhood friend: tba

enemy: tba

past romances: natalie dent, tba

pets: luna & shadow (her corgis)

roommate(s): tba

( &&. social media )

do they have a Facebook? Twitter? Instagram? Vine? Snapchat? Tinder/Grindr? Tumblr? YouTube?

if so; Name on Facebook: charlotte fortier

twitter handle: @char_fortier

instagram user: @char_fortier

vine user: RIP VINE

snapchat user: charliebitme

name on Tinder: charlotte fortier

tumblr URL: n/a

youTube channel: n/a

( &&. musical tastes )

Theme song: honey by kehlani

Can relate to: she don’t by ella mai

Makes them happy: sunday candy by chance the rapper

Makes them sad: we find love by daniel caesar (actually anything by daniel caesar gets her in her feelings???)

Makes them dance: wannabe by the spice girls

Loves the most: sam smith. literally. 

Describes them: fine by vada

Never gets tired of: ain’t it fun by paramore

Would like to be played at their wedding: best part by daniel caesar

Would like to play at their funeral: promises by jhene aiko

( &&. miscellaneous )

Do they have a fake I.D.?: yes

Are they a virgin?: no

Describe their signature: there are only two distinct letters in her signature, one being c for charlotte and the f for fortier

How long would they survive in a zombie apocalypse?: probably not that long. i see her being killed in the first two days or so

Do they travel?: she loves to travel. last summer she went on a cross country road trip with her brothers

One place they would like to live: paris, france

One place they would like to visit: seoul, south korea

Celebrity crush: hayley kiyoko

What can you find in their pockets/wallet/purse: a hair tie / a two dollar bill / two packs of gum, her wallet, random makeup products, and lotion 

Place(s) your character can always be found: rooftop of the pi gamma house, in the library

When does your character like to wake up?: honestly??? noon. 

What’s your character’s morning routine?: wake up, scavenge for breakfast, go take a shower, throw on some clothes and pat on some makeup

What does your character eat for breakfast/lunch/dinner?: usually cereal or some eggos / skips lunch on most days??? but probs might ask someone to go to chipotle or something / dining hall anyone??? 

How does your character spend their free days?: smoking, napping, reading

What’s your character’s bedtime routine?: if she has the time to, she’ll take a bath and do a face mask. but if not, she just takes off her makeup and washes her face. 

What does your character wear to bed?: typically an oversized shirt and just underwear

If your character can’t fall asleep, what are they thinking about?: a shit ton of things. what does her schedule look like tomorrow? what work she has to do? any emails that she has to get back to? all types of shit. random shit too. what are millenials really doing with their time? how effective is the sushi making contraption tube thing?

What has been their greatest achievement?: graduating as one of the valedictorians in high school

What or who is the greatest love of their life?: natalie dent

Most marked characteristic: honesty

How would they like to die?: peacefully and in her sleep

Do they snore?: no

Do they chew their pens/pencils?: no

Can they curl their tongue?: no

Can they whistle?: yes

Do they believe in the supernatural?: no, ghosts aren’t real wth *cue shane impersonation*

Have they ever cheated on anyone?: never

Have they ever been cheated on?: no

Has anyone ever broken their heart?: yes

Have they ever broken anyone’s heart?: no not that she knows of

Are they squeamish?: no

Have they ever killed anyone? Why? How?: no

Have they ever seen anyone die? What happened?: no

Are they a lightweight?: definitely not.