#missy and the 12th doctor in season 10 specifically

[picturemecountingcards]

unpopular opinion but i actually really enjoyed that drea and eleanor didn't kiss in do revenge. they hit that sweet spot that makes me go insane, of characters who are extremely close to each other, have a complex, deep (and fucked up) relationship, could probably be called the most important people in each other's lives and are in no way romantically involved. i love how physically affectionate they are, how drea says that the only times she'd been happy that year had been with eleanor, how they can't stand each other and love each other so so much. i love how much they've deliberately (and not) hurt each other and how they can't atone for that but they can move on and be better together. i also love that they're unhinged.

[gallifvrey]

alright here we go

(i am finally calm enough that i can express my thoughts in words instead of high pitched screaming)

i really, really loved that episode. i thought it was a spectacular end, it frankly went above all of my expectations. the ending w bill was very, very cliche but it was such a nice subversion of tropes, i thought it was really nice and good and i really did like it a lot

the beginning was really good - i liked the two regenerations of the master working together against the doctor (i am def. gonna talk more abt missy later tho) and bill coming back to save the doctor was, really great imo. 

i really liked nardole in this episode, he was a lot more than the comic relief that he had been kinda portrayed as in the previous episodes, and i thought that was really nice, i liked how his hacking skills were utilized in a way that made sense and i liked how he wasnt fazed by anything. he managed to be a funny character while still being a very critical one, 

i thought the master and missy talking and stuff was really interesting, i really really enjoyed their relationship and i thought it was great

i loved the doctor and bill talking. i wanted her to fight him, i wanted her to be human and he woke up and i wanted her to just punch him, to make him apologize for leaving her, for chattering on while she waited for him, because thats what he did. he didnt run down as soon as he realized what was happening (and you know he realized really quickly - he couldve just explained it on their trip down, he didnt have to spend all that time drawing diagrams). i was annoyed and i felt angry on bills behalf i guess that she wasnt able to get angry at him, that she couldnt yell at him like she (and i) wanted to. i almost hope she’ll come back bc i want her to talk abt this with the doctor, but you know, i dont think theyve ever really done that so im not too shocked

i didnt love missy. ive said this a lot before and ill probably keep saying it but i keep thinking that missys redemption arc is... a bit forced. ive been rewatching the previous episodes in the 12th doctor with missy and i realize now that she was moving towards being a “better” person, specifically in regards to the doctor (she didnt want to kill him at every step necessarily), but this whole thing still seems very forced to me, at least. imo the idea of her suddenly standing with the doctor was a bit strange. i havent seen the old episodes so maybe this is some kind of characterization that ive missed, and i know ive only been exposed to an unusually dark and manic version of the master but i liked where she was, i liked how maybe they werent enemies but they were opposites in a way (i think she peaked in the magicians apprentice tbh - that was i think as ~good~ as the master should get, as a character. likes the doctor but has complete disregard for anyone else. her standing with the doctor to save a bunch of people she doesnt know was definitely a weirdly out of character moment, at least to me)

idk maybe i just like watching the doctor suffer (is that weird? probably right?)

i thought her and the master stabbing each other in the back very literally was a good choice, it was interesting to see how the master regenerated, and im interested in how theyre gonna bring the master back (bc i will not believe that they actually killed her off)

the ending, i thought, was so good. i remember reading a thing a while ago about how moffat likes to write his episodes in a very fairytale-like way, and the ending definitely reflected that. i LOVED that bills girlfriend (bc i dont know her name , sry ) showed back up. i loved that so much, i loved how she brought her back to life and made her not a cyberman anymore, and how theyre traveling the universe together. i loved that! them like facing each other and then simultaneously turning and facing out the door and then holding hands and leaving was.. really cliche and seemed a bit silly but you know, ill take it (the gays in space was great), and the bit w bill crying on top of the doctor and then saying “when theres tears, theres hope” or something was also a lot but also sweet, and ill take it bc i was so emotional by that point in the episode i needed something that was stupidly sweet

AND THEN! AFTER THEY LEAVE!! THATS WHEN IT ENDED!! the montage of the companions saying doctor! just i cried!! this was the beginning of my descent, i was ready to depart and then it just ! kept getting worse! i keep talking abt how much i wish they made references to the old seasons (ex. when clara had to lose her memories for the doctor to say like, ive done this before and i hated it) but then all the sudden they did and i was ! not prepared! bc then he goes “i dont want to go” and like, there went my consciousness and boy was i glad that i was watching this w my family who wouldnt judge me bc i was not being rational

and then “when the doctor was me” like i didnt even realize he said that at first honestly i was so caught up in him saying i dont want to go and being emotional bc of that that i couldnt.. handle it, and him refusing to regenerate was so sad!! it was so much like 10 and 10s was the saddest regeneration i couldnt handle it!!! i am not prepared for this christmas special!!! !!!!!!

in conclusion, i loved the episode and am not ready to have my heart ripped out when it comes to the christmas special