#moms either abandon their kids or raised them questionably or died

[bipanicoverthegravessiblings]

Andrew and Ashley x Male reader who can commune with the dead?

Gotcha gotcha

Graves Siblings x Medium!Male Reader

To be completely honest….the ability to talk to ghosts isn’t as cool as it sounds

Most would expect ghosts to hang around graveyards or abandoned buildings like a school, or a hospital, or a house- but no. They were everywhere

To be honest, it made sense. Why would a ghost want to hang around where they died? Thats just depressing

So, they wander. Following their loved ones. Trying to live an empty husk of their old life. Being fucking weird.

Which made it hard for you to tell the difference a lot of the time. Sometimes you’d talk to a person and they’d turn out to be a ghost!

Now you look crazy!

Like recently…

The sidewalks were virtually empty. It was getting late into the evening, and it made sense that people would head home. You yourself were making your way back to your apartment building when you spotted something….strange.

A girl. A little girl. She looked no older than…7 maybe? In all honesty you were never good guessing ages, but you knew enough to deduce that this kid was too young to be by herself. She looked around anxiously, her blonde pigtails moving every time she turned her head. Her hands fussed with the hem of her purple shirt that had a flower on it. It looked like she was looking for her parent.

You were- hesitant about walking over. A strange man approaching a child in the middle of the sidewalk looked sketchy, especially since you were nowhere near looking like this kid’s parents. But- you figured that if you didn’t, some actual creep would. So, you hesitantly stepped towards her.

“Heyyy…kid,” the girl flinched a little as you approached, making you regret your decision. Though, it was too late to turn back now so, “Uh- where’s your mom?..”

The girl blinked up at you and then looked away, hands still fidgeting with her shirt, “Away…” she sounded sad.

“Your dad?..” you raised an eyebrow.

“Also away..” she shrunk a little, this seemed like a touchy subject.

Picking up the vibe, you steered clear of parent related questions, “Are you…looking for someone? You look lost.”

She glanced up at you, and then back to her hands- her purple eyes welling with tears, “Y-Yeah…” she squeaked out.

“Well, maybe I can help you find them,” you knelt down to her height, “There aren’t a lot of people out right now, so it shouldn’t be too hard…do you remember what they look like?”

The girl nodded, “Uhh…two adults. Black hair. A boy with green eyes and a girl with pink eyes.”

Two black haired adults with green and pink eyes. Okay! Easy enough! Must be siblings…or babysitters….or….some third thing. You stood up, “Okay! Should be easy enough!” You held your hand out for the little girl, “My name is Y/N, what’s yours?”

The little girl studied your hand curiously, taking it with a small smile, “Nina!”

You and Nina searched for the adults she was supposed to be with, until you came across them sitting and eating in the outdoor area of a restaurant

You were…baffled. These people supposedly lost track of the kid they were supposed to be watching and decided to get something to eat???

You were reconsidering handing this kid over to them, but what were you going to do? Take her to the authorities? You didn’t exactly trust pigs around this kid either, so you approached the table

The pair looked at you with hostility, the man reading a paper and the woman poking it in boredom. You were clearly interrupting something. Maybe they hadn’t noticed Nina…

“Uhm- sorry if I’m interrupting anything..” you stammered, “But, I think you lost something?..” you nodded your head to where Nina was standing beside you.

Both black haired individuals narrowed their eyes at you, looks of confusion clear across their faces.

“What the fuck are you on about?…” the woman’s eyes narrowed.

You felt yourself grow flushed with embarrassment, Nina hasn’t said anything or run to hug either of these individuals….it also felt like she wasn’t holding your hand anymore…

You glanced down at your side, and lo and behold- Nina was gone. You whipped around, looking around like a mad man for the kid.

“Wh- what the?” Your eyes widened and you held out your hands defensively, “I swear there was a kid here!”

The man leaned towards the woman, whispering to her loud enough for you to hear, “You have your gun on you, right?..” the woman nodded.

Shit! Okay! Sweat poured down your face as you nervously looked around some more to avoid getting shot, “I-I swear! There was a kid here, about like….7? Maybe younger? Blonde pigtails, purple shirt with a flower on it,” you didn’t notice both individuals eyes widen, “Her name was Nina—“

“WHO TOLD YOU THAT NAME?!” The woman grabbed you by your shirt collar, pulling you close. She stared daggers at you, looking ready to kick you in the groin before shooting you dead. You gulped.

“Ashley!” The man slammed the newspaper down, reprimanding her to let you go. Ashley obliged, though turned away and grumbled. The man gave her a final glare before looking at you, “I’m sorry about her,” he had a calm demeanor…but there was something uneasy about his voice, “You said…Nina?”

You nodded, “Yeeaahhh, but I’m starting to realize that…might’ve just been a ghost. Whoops.” You held out your hands anxiously.

“Dumb bitch is still following you around?” Ashley muttered under her breath.

You turned your attention to her, “I’m sorry what?”

“Don’t mind her,” the man smiled uneasily, “I’m Andrew…now- what the fuck did you mean by ‘might’ve been a ghost’? Is this a…regular occurrence?”

“Kinda..” you rubbed the back of your neck nervously, “I kind have this sixth sense. Some people have increased empathy, I can talk to body detached spirits!” You looked Andrew and Ashley over, “Did you- know this Nina?”

“No!” They both said in perfect unison, Ashley seemingly offended while Andrew was very defensive. They clearly knew her, but you weren’t going to press any further.

“Oooookkaayyyyyy..” you adverted your gaze from their terrifying…yet alluring…ones.

You wanted to run away and hopefully never run into these people again, but they were insistent on keeping you in sight

However they knew this Nina, it was something serious.

Ashley didn’t seem to take the fact that she was still following them around very well

Andrew consistently had to calm her down from making a scene

And truthfully….watching them banter was fun

You’d idly stare at the pair, going back and forth with empty threats and remarks the other would make about those threats. It was fun. It was nice

Andrew decided it was best to keep in touch with you, given you running into Nina- though how he said it made it seem like the two had multiple dead people that would be tailing them

You didn’t say this out loud though

The more time you spent with the siblings, your theory became correct

You slowly noticed more and more spirits hanging around the three of you: A scorned looking middle aged woman with similars eyes to Andrew’s, a hooded man with his limbs floating behind him, another hooded man with thick sunglasses and a mask that obscured his face- you could go one.

You never talked with these ghosts, really the only one you did speak to was Nina- though Ashley didn’t like it when you two spoke. She didn’t like Nina in general

If she caught you talking with her, or making motions to indicate she was around- Ashley would spew profanities and horrible things til she went away

It was cruel…and you kind of hated her for it at first

Though the more time you spent with the siblings, you came to realize that they were just….broken individuals

Terrible people put into shitty circumstances

It was almost…disheartening

If things had been different, would they have turned out better? The same? Worse?

It hurt your heart more than you wanted to admit…

You knew your feelings towards these two, at first you assumed it to be just fleeting physical attraction- I mean- look at them!

But no- turns out spending time with people increased your attraction to them. Who knew!

You like to think at least one of them felt the same

You knew the whole reason they kept you around was to keep an eye on you, make sure you didn’t know anything you shouldn’t have

At least at first it was

Andrew was the first to catch feelings for you

His love of the macabre led to conversations, questions on if you’ve ever spoken with ghosts of poets or writers he was interested in

He didn’t have to know you totally lied when you said yes

Unfortunately you had to read up on old English poets in case he asked about them, but it was a worthy sacrifice

He was just happy to have someone to talk to about an interest that wouldn’t make fun of him

Ashley didn’t take too kindly to this, which is why she fell slower

She didn’t buy any of your kindness, acting distant and cold with you- especially as you got closer with Andrew

It was also causing tension between the two, you could just guess it

So you took the initiative, deciding to spend the day just you and Ashley

Ashley was going to spend the day with you whether she liked it or not…and right now it was looking like a not. Since you two arrived at the park, she hadn’t said a word to you. The only response you would get is a cold shoulder or an icy glare that cut like a knife. It was a little painful to be honest. You never wanted to piss her off or make her hate you, genuinely you wanted to get closer to her. But Ashley was proving to be difficult…

“Sky sure is pretty today!” You said, attempting to break the awkward and tense silence. It did not work, as Ashley continued to ignore you. You wanted nothing more than to book it into the nearby duck pond and just drown, putting this awkward attempt at bonding.

You were walking down a trail, Ashley actively stepping on the cracks as she walked. In the corner of your eye you spotted the familiar spirit of the middle aged woman. Her lighter green eyes narrowing at Ashley.

“What are you looking at?” Ashley’s voice pierced the silence like a katana. You blinked down at her, her eyes narrowed up at you.

“Uhhh,” you glanced at the ghost, “Just a ghost hanging around.”

“Who?”

Holy crap she’s actually talking to you! Don’t fuck this up…

“I haven’t really spoken with her..uh- black hair. Green eyes. Middle aged..” you shrugged your shoulders.

That was apparently the wrong answer- as most of your responses to Ashley were- as she clammed up. This time with more anger. Her eyes darted in the direction you’d been looking in, trying to give the ghost a death glare. Must be another person the siblings had history with, given how similar she looked to them they must be related.

Hmmm….maybe this could be put to your advantage?…

“You know I can talk with ghosts…” you said rather nonchalantly, “I could…deliver a message to this ghost if you want..”

Ashley’s eye seemed to light up at that. For the first time since meeting her, you think you said the right thing.

Ashley’s message to the ghost woman, and any other you came across, was vulgar and worthy of eating soap if you were to repeat it to a living person

A lot of use of the word “hussy” and “cunt”

But you delivered every message, informed Ashley when a ghost was staring at her….minus Nina of course

A ghost child is still a child, and she seemed like too good of a kid to be in the front of Ashley’s wrath

But Ashley didn’t need to know that

For once, she seemed to genuinely enjoy your company. Describing you as “pretty alright” to Andrew

Success!

From then things felt…less tense between the three of you

You were less of a hostage to them and more of a friend

And if you played your cards right….eventually you might be more

[feelbokkie]

More backstory for Annie Line (aka orphan line) for Let's Fall in Love, IRL

But the boys

i got asked this in the comments of chapter 5 so i thought i would make a whole post

i'm still debating if i'm going to actually put this in the fic but i of course know roughly how old each boy was when they got into the group home and why so i thought i would share.

i may still find a way to put in in the fic later but just in case

Question: "we're the kids in the group home since like they were babies?"

the short answer: yes and no

tw: abandonment, mention of death, mention of parents losing custody, mention of child abuse

Chan

In the group home since birth

His parents were young and gave him up before moving to Australia. A group home is supposed to function a sort of limbo while children wait to either be put into foster homes or adopted or to be brought back to their parents. None of that happened for Chan so he just...stayed at the group home. His parents ended up having two kids later (Hannah and Lucas) which he does know but only found out when he aged out of the system and requested his files. He decided it was best not to interrupt their lives and besides, he made his own little family.

Changbin

In the group home since he was 1

Changbin's dad died right before he was born. Ironically enough, he was also a firefighter and died in line of duty. The grief and the eventual postpartum depression was too much for his mom so he and his older sister were taken away from her while she was institutionalized. A family member who already had too many kids of their own took in his sister and thought that raising another boy was too much of a hassle than he was worth. Eventually his mom died and his sister got officially adopted by the relative who then moved to another part of the country.

Hyunjin

In the group home since he was 6 months

Hyunjin's mom died in childbirth and his dad tried to take care of him on his own but he was a painful reminder so he gave him up. He lied to his family when they asked what happened to the baby. He told them that the baby died from SID (sudden infant death syndrome) and couldn't deal with another funeral so shortly after his wife died. Hyun's file is almost completely blank besides that fact about his mother and his name, which was chosen by his mother.

Seungmin

In the group home since he was 4

Both Seungmin and his older sister were children of abuse. Their parents were arrest and both Seungmin and his sister were put into the same group home. However, Seungmin's sister ended up getting adopted. They tried to get both children adopted together to prevent them from being seperated but the parents who adopted her only wanted one child. She promised that they would see each other in school and that she would come visit him but eventually, the family ended moving to the states shortly after. The siblings never got the chance to say goodbye.

[black-klok-youth-pastor]

[OC Profile] Cordelia Lillian Offdensen

Because I am now contractually obligated to infodump about her now. Some parts might have been influenced by other fan fics ,but I either have permission and/or at least gave them enough of my own twist that I'm copying other people's homework too much Spoiler warning for all of Metalolcaypse so far (this is all pre-movie so if my predictions are wrong, oh well). Also content warnings for: pregnancy-related death, child neglect, sexual harassment, alcoholism, and parental death, as well as bits of canon typical dark humor.

Born May 13th, 1945

Died October 3rd, 1993 (...probably, I'll explain in a bit)

Voice Claim: Rachel Bloom/Laraine Newman (if we have to follow the pattern of the other Dethklok moms)

Face Claim: This lady from Writersklok

Personality: A well-intended and kind, but very troubled woman that has trouble being taken seriously despite being rather intelligent and ambitious leading her to unhealthy coping mechanisms such as drinking and casual sex.

Character Inspirations: Cutie Cutie Cupcake (BoJack Horseman), Meredith Quill (Guardians of the Galaxy), Paula Small (Home Movies), Paula Proctor (Crazy Ex-Girlfriend), Misato Katsuragi (Evangelion), Annie Hughes (The Iron Giant), Peggy Olson (Mad Men), Halley (The Florida Project), Mina Harker (Bram Stroker's Dracula)

Music Tastes: The Amazelingtons, Blue Oyster Cult, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Electric Light Orchestra, Led Zeppelin, The Beatles, Elton John, Nina Simone, Fleetwood Mac

Bonus playlist

Backstory

She was Salacia’s consort in a past life, unfortunately, she was slain in a siege alongside their unborn child. He tried to resurrect her using a certain kind of purple magic...it did not end well. Cordelia would sometimes have past life nightmares about this with zero context as to what was happening.

She and Salacia met by chance in 1965, back then being a mere law school student; while Salacia was happy to see his beloved wife again...this time he had more ulterior motives convinced that it was part of the Prophecy (if still having to create the Sal persona for obvious reasons). Which he was right, but for the wrong reasons since Charles was an accidental pregnancy so she had to drop out of school and the two had to elope. Her parents were pissed of course and they did not see Cordelia or Charles until he abandoned the family some five or six years later.

Even though Salacia can technically be in two places at once it's pretty taxing (as well as worries that his other self was starting to develop a personality and will of his own) and eventually just to started to realize the more practical problems of his facade such as...oh yeah and his presence having bits of the plague that cause sickness if not death in some people to the point where people assumed for years that Charles was chronically ill. He might've been an asshole for abandoning them, but financially supported them in secret and had them under surveillance by marking them as "people of interest". Although even if he didn't have high hope for him, he had quite a few other children on standby.

Mysterious checks from the government she didn't question aside it was a bit difficult being a single mother in the 1970s albeit was able to get work as a paralegal at the slightly dubious Ensiferum & Associates. So because of this, she was pretty much what you think of when "Gen X mom" comes to mind, with Charles being very much a latchkey kid who more or less raised himself at points. Not for lack of trying since she was capable of being a very loving mother, but was severely overworked and self-medicated with alcohol to cope with the stress of working as an unmarried woman during Mad Men times and general untreated mental health issues. In fact, it was to the point where Charles feeling the need to take care of other people's needs above his own partially explains why he's slightly messed up as an adult. And yet she's among one of the more competent employees at the firm when sober (gee why does that sound familiar?).

Was generally supportive of Charles's goals, but was terrified of him abandoning her much like his father so she definitely didn't take Charles heading off to boarding school well (although she at least had the decency to not say it out loud) and was enough of a mess to require intervention so she at least mellowed out in her final years before peacefully passing in 1993, her lifespan cut tragically short due to a combination of the Salacia plague still affecting her body years later and alcohol abuse.

...which is the version I usually go with in my fics, but personally, I think it's funnier and opens more story potential if she survives to the series' present day, but is just locked out of the loop of the whole "son being the manager of the world's largest band/economic force and later a cult leader" thing. Like I'd probably figured she get along with most of the Dethklok moms (except for maybe Molly but even then because the latter is a massive hypocrite), and Dethklok for themselves for that matter, especially Toki, which Charles would be a bit conflicted about the latter even if she is trying to make up for her previous faults as a mother. I guess for now it's sort of diverging paths, but at least until the movie comes out "dead mom" is the main timeline for my fics.

Overall Charles has a...complicated view of his mother, on one hand, her neglectful parenting did cause a fair amount of emotional scarring that hasn't healed even decades later and severely affected his interpersonal relationships even as an adult, but on the other hand, was at least aware of her struggles with the benefit of hindsight and wouldn't be half the man he was today without her influence.

[sea-owl]

Question about Stepdad Anthony au: why was Kate thrown out after her husband died? Who was he? What's Kate's situation now? Did Anthony meet her the same way? And yes, Anthony would know how to handle children because he has plenty of experience but what do he and little Neela and Newton bond over? So Gregory and Hyacinth recruit them for mischief making? What's the honeymoon like? How much is Violet planning to spoil her new grandbabies? What was the marriage negotiation like? How do Mary, Edwina and Danbury think about it?

So to answer the first question it requires a little bit of real-world history. Now I am by no means an expert on this, this was some information I had learned and read up on a few years back when a world history class I was taking did a segment on death around the world, and obviously there are different experiences, and there are some who are pushing for change. But to answer the first question widowhood in India has basically been a social death for women. Many are seen as shameful burdens who bring bad luck and can potentially face abuse, sexual assault, or abandonment after the death of their husbands. This being common enough that the city of Vrindavan is nicknamed the city of widows because so many go there seeking refuge. It is believed to host somewhere around 20,000 widows. In the early 1800s the practice of Sati, or widow burning, was still commonly practiced as well. This was where a widow would sit on her husband's funeral pyre and burn with him, either willing or unwilling.

Mary being from England kinda saves Kate from that by taking her back in after she is made a widow. In this au it is also one of the reasons why they move to England, it being safer for Kate to raise her children.

As for the situation now Kate focuses on her children and getting Edwina a good match. She goes by her maiden name again and her children also go by it. Getting remarried hasn't even crossed her mind as a possibility until Anthony proposes his deal. After that her practicality takes over and she's going through what this deal could do to help her family. She agrees under the stipulation that he meets Neela and Newton first.

Anthony calls the next day with flowers for all the Sharma ladies, even a mini bouquet so little Neela can hold it. He also brings sweets and age appropriate toys for 5 year old Neela and 2 year old Newton.

Anthony surprised Kate when he got down on the children's level and began introducing himself. Newton was fascinated by someone new. Neela was more hesitant, taking glances back at her mom for cues. Kate gives her the daughter the okay Neela shyly introduces herself.

Dad mode comes out of Anthony and Kate can see his softer side earlier than she did in the show. They spend the whole afternoon together and playing with the children.

They spend about two months doing meetings like this, just to get the kids more comfortable with Anthony before announcing their engagement and moving them in together.

Unknown to Kate Anthony had sat down with Neela and Newton to ask their permission to marry their mom. The children have seen how happier their mother is and agree. They like Anthony anyway, he's way better than some of those men who come to visit Aunt Edwina.

When the time comes for them to finally tell their families Anthony invites the Sharmas over for dinner, including the little Sharmas. Anthony and Kate pull their moms and Lady Danbury into Anthony's office where they announce their intention to marry.

Violet and Lady Danbury are immediately congratulating the couple, but Mary is concerned. Kate's first marriage had essentially been for the family too, an arrangement she encouraged Miles to take, and that did not end well.

Mary asks for a moment with her daughter. They talk things out. Mary is, rightfully, concerned about Kate. Kate assures her this is something she wants, that Anthony will be a good father to her children, and she will be happy knowing her children will be secured. Still hesitant Mary agrees to the match, there was something, a spark maybe, in Kate's eyes that Mary hasnt seen before and it gave her hope.

[nonokoko13]

Child!reader being adopted by spy x family characters Pt. 2

As I said in the previous part, these adoption headcanons are really specific, including your hypothetical pronouns and name; these two are extra so you can imagine yourself with your name and desired gender. You can ask for less specific headcanons if you want too. Part 1 here

Enjoy!

Sylvia Sherwood

How you met

She carries the responsibility of WISE, she needs to be committed to it. More than ever now that the peace was threatened every day by those who wanted war to arise again

She missed her family, but she overcame it. Just like the HQ she had to be impenetrable

At least, that's what she thought

Because right in front of her there was the question which answers she wanted to hear. A kid.

It would be normal to see one if she wasn't at the HQ

It didn't help no one knew there was a kid there until you spoke up

The camera system didn't record you and there wasn't any entrance to the agency that had been forced. You weren't any employee's kid either

After scolding them and order to search your parents she met you again

"Hello little one. May I ask you how did you get in here?"

You smiled, seeming to have been waiting her to ask

"Because I like to play and explore! And I'm really good at hide and seek"

Sylvia raised an eyebrow. No matter how well someone was good at hiding there was no way you could break into the HQ; it sounded surrealistic

"But how did you find this place?"

"Because it was easy to find"

"Don't you think you could end bad breaking into unknown places?"

"If I don't know what isthis place how I'd know that?"

Fair enough

That conversation wasn't going anywhere, yet she was angrier with the security staff than you. You didn't look worried though

You gave her an idea

"Do you want to play with me?"

Both entered in the nearest police station, she talked with the officers before telling you to count until 1000 while she was going to hide. You started the count facing a wall

She felt bad, but there were some traffickers she had to catch before they made the exchange

She was following their car; everything fine until she believed to see a small hand greeting her from the car's trunk

She returned to the police station to find out that moments later of her departure you disappeared without anyone realizing. She went to the point where the delivery would be made

Outside the abandoned warehouse there was no signal that you were there until she saw you getting out from under the car on the other side

Something caused a shooting that would make the police come and caught her at any moment. The bands kept shooting at each other while you were behind a transport container

"What were you thinking?! I told you to stay with the police!"

"I'm sorry, I counted until I know, then I saw you following the car, so I followed too. But before they caught me I hid in there...I'm sorry..." You pulled out a walkie-talkie

"I got two from the police station. I left one in there so the others thought the guys of that car were betraying them, it should have worked to scape with no bad guys seeing us"

She was impressed. However, there was no time to ask where you learn that from

Analyzing the situation the principal scape was blocked, fortunately they hadn't noticed you yet so–

You pulled her shirt, pointing somewhere else

"Let's get out"

General headcanons

Sylvia was still surprised that your plan of exiting through a rear window she hadn't seen and walk away without hurry could work

She stopped walking to watch you smash the walkie-talkie and take out some matches to burn it

"Now they can't find footprints!"

The police may not get answers about it but she had many questions for you

She lied to you about the HQ, after the shooting her lie was on the floor. Thenceforth Sylvia's not able to tell if you were playing along and keeping her secret or you have no idea what's all about

You thought her name was Handler. When you knew she was called Sylvia Sherwood you pointed your hoody logo and say "S of Super, you're superman–Superwoman!"

That's how she begun to be mistaken with an endearing mother and her son. She was superwoman and you "kid", because you said that's how you were called, along with child, shrimp, demon...

"That's unacceptable". She handed you lists of names to choose, unfortunately no one convinced you

It wasn't until you two went to a jewelry store that you found the name

The casual way you break in HQ when you want still frustrates her, how do you do it?? You don't see big deal though

Fullmetal lady didn't remember how tough was motherhood

Anyone would freak out if they found out about spies. Yet there you are, admiring flying guys in underpants

Sylvia asked you about your family, but you always tell the same: you lived with dad until he left you with a woman that he said was your mom

The Handler found out your father is a repeat offender, currently on a maximum security prison in another country. Both him and the woman without offspring legally

"Please, don't tell me one of his criminal records is jailbreaking"

The informant doubted "Actually, that's the main one"

"..."

The Forgers

Scenario where it's up to both of them to adopt you. To keep Loid's mental sanity safe it will be independent of the timeline where Yor has a kid on her own, feel free to imagine both kids being Anya's siblings at the same time. You can ask me to include that idea if I write more about this

How you met

As I said before Twilight wouldn't adopt anyone due his job, only one kid for Operation Strix and that was Anya. For now Yor didn't want more kids, she loves Anya and that's enough for them

Not for Anya. She wanted a little sibling

All started talking with Becky when Damian mentioned his brother. Back at home she brought the topic and neither Pa or Ma were giving her an answer of where babies come from

That's when she begun to feel like being a sister. Any plan helped her to convince her parents though

Anya remembered something Mr Henderson told them. "If you want something, take it into your own hands"

And she took it too seriously

Next day Anya and Bond disappeared, she was in the dogs park with Yor

While Mrs Forger panicked Anya had returned to the place she met Twilight

As the time passed the Forgers worried more. When they found Anya and Bond at their building's door they felt relieved

Your presence didn't make things better

They asked Anya where she had been and where did you come from. She said she adopted you

Of course Anya wasn't going to say she broke into an orphanage and took you

Loid's scolding made you cry

"Anya, we aren't adopting–"

"If she's not my sister I won't go to school ever again!!"

"Just for a trial period" that's what Loid hoped

General headcanons

Loid thought babies were easy because it's unnecessary (more impossible) communication with a living being that can't talk; after all babies only have basic needs. He was wrong

It would be easier if you could talk. Why are you crying? You have eaten! Are you sad? Cold? You dislike him?

Yor is not better either. Because her parents died when Yuri was a kid Yor didn't have experience with changing diapers, or anything related with babies

She was more scared than Loid to the point she didn't want to hold you. She broke Yuri's ribs with a hug when he was a toddler, what if she kills you with few contact?

In less than 24 hours you already had a crib and all kinds of things a baby would need. However, having three bedrooms and parents sleeping in separate rooms meant all your things ended in Anya's room

You cried at night until they discovered you calmed down when Anya let you a plushie to hug

She can't wait for the day pa and ma share bed to take back her bedroom

The second night Anya had an idea

Ma is scared of being your mom, solution? Leave you in her bed while Yor is asleep imagining that would work

Thanks God Yor doesn't move much when sleeping. On the other hand Yor is a light sleeper due not being used to sleep with someone so she woke up minutes later

She almost jump out of the bed, realizing that would make you cry made her contain. You groaned, did she wake you up? Yor wasn't sure of holding you, instead she laid down again and approached you to her chest

Seeing you so peaceful by her side melted her, thinking about it you looked a bit like her and Loid.. She blushed at the embarrassing thought

Bold of them to not imagine that's why Anya chose you

In the morning Loid discovered what happened and had a little words with Anya during breakfast before she went to school

Yor went to work and he decided to take a day off from his work to spend the morning with you. The Handler said the first days you should see them to recognize faces

Walks with Bond, buying toys, trying to teach you sign language...Normal stuff

Loid is glad you don't do anything but sleep and eat, except your obsession with munching. When you first kissed Yor he found it normal until you munched her cheek and now you do that to everyone; probably you're teething

Yor found it really cute, but you shouldn't go kissing and chewing cheeks. Anya thinks is funny just don't try to chew her hair again please

Another problem came with names. Loid was going through a list of 850 names in alphabetical order, meanings included; Yor didn't take it to the extreme

"Hum, what about Rose? I think it's a cute name, I mean it's both decision and I'm not good with names Loid–"

Welcome to the family Rose

A spy, an assassin, a telepath and... Well, a baby. Seems like a good mix

Yor Briar

As we know Twilight only would adopt for Operation Strix's sake. Yor became mother by marrying Loid, but what if she had already a kid before being Mrs Forger?

Inspired by this post of @say-seira

How you met

Long ago before Twilight adopted the identity of Loid Forger, the Briars moved to a flat in Berlint

While the eldest sibling had recently become an adult Yuri was only a kid, Yor decided to move to the city so he had nearer his school. It was possible due her proper salary as Thorn Princess

This change would make her job easier too. She had a new client which death could pay Yuri's entrance to a good university

There was a politician who negotiated with terrorists, helping them to get into Ostania and providing them with weapons in exchange to gain good propaganda abroad and getting rid of competition

Knowing this was enough to make Yor's blood boil. He deserved to die, she was sure of it

Struggling with the security around him, Yor finally killed the target without leaving trace

The only inconvenience was a bad injury made by a bullet that she received. After removing the bullet the wound got worse

She went to the hospital to avoid an infection. In the waiting room she met a kind lady, Yor swore that she had seen her before

The woman was scared, but Yor reassured her she will wait her

While Yor was attended the girl was taken to another room. As she promised, Yor waited in the hall after her wound was treated; with a buttoned medical gown on because she didn't want to attract more attention due the bandaged wound in sight

Time passed and many people enter and exit from the room, but she didn't. A nurse carrying something mistook her for one of the staff and scolded her for standing there

"Here, take the baby to the nursery"

"Me? But— wait! What about the woman? Is she okay?"

From afar she heard the answer, but before Yor could explain the error the woman had left. She was shocked, how? She seemed fine

Against her will the dark-haired looked at the lump she was holding: rosy cheeks babbling in dreams, you were in peace

Her shock grew when she saw you shared the username that the man she killed had. That's why the woman was familiar: she was the politician's daughter

Yor searched someone who hand the baby when she recognized the doctor that guided the woman to the room, he was talking with a masked nurse

The fact they went to a private place and maintained their voices low made her suspect

"Did you take care of the mother?" the nurse asked

"Yes, they got ahead of us with her father but I think they will pay us anyway. When they found it was a medical negligence we'll be far from here"

Yor understood they were assassins as well, probably paid by a rival. Luckily they hadn't seen her yet

"Heh, do you they will pay more if we got rid of the baby?"

Yor left the hospital with you, unsure of what to do. Did you have more relatives? The widowed politician didn't have more kids, and your mother came alone. What if they wanted to kill the rest of the family?

A small hand grabbed hers, and every fear disappeared. Looking at each other, she knew you were safer with her. Perhaps it was only guilt or sympathy, but she would try

General headcanons

The moment Yuri saw Yor holding you was in disbelief. Yor said she found you in the streets and he believed it

At first he tried to convince her sister to leave you in a orphanage but once scolding was enough to cease

Still disliking you for the first months. It took some time until he saw you like one of his family

Yuri helped, although they had a rough time because you refused to eat Yor's purees. Your endurance might grew up to make you the only person who can eat her food without bleeding but it doesn't mean you like its flavor

She viewed you as a sibling until you were two, being called mom made Yor too happy to correct you. Yuri was just Yuri, you never feel like using formalities with him or addressing "Uncle" everytime you talked

Yor decided to let your belongings, it was better that way. When you were older, and only if you wanted, she would tell you the truth

She's bad with names, Rose was the only name she could think of but you're a boy. Yor's parents loved that Yuri and her had matching names, therefore you would be the sweet addition to it

The only name I could think of is Yuu because it's gender neutral and means "you" sorry

During the first year of your life she didn't try to hide the blood of her clothes from you. Yuri never suspected either and you wouldn't remember it when you grow up

Your lack of childhood amnesia was something she didn't have in count. Not that she knows you know anyway

Yor has been training you since you were able to walk, if she wasn't there when you needed at least you would be ready to defend yourself. Proud to say you're her strong boy

That said, if the assassins that tried to killed you found were you lived it's something you ignore. Being the protective mother Yor is they could be dead by now

Six years later, it was still Yor and you against the world, with Yuri being the only paternal figure you had. Before one day she met a man and everything changed

She said he will help her by accompanying her to a party so Yuri stopped worrying about her. She said it would be one night, and the next morning you woke up with Yor waiting to talk with you

In part she accepted because of you; you passed the Eden exam before knowing you needed a dad for it. That requisite seemed stupid for you, as you reassured her you could go to any other school; now you would be accepted into the best school!

You agreed and started packing. What else you could do? The decision was made before you were asked anyway, and you didn't want to argue with your mom because she was doing it for your future too

Of course it affected you. No matter how nice they were it was a huge change; in one day you had to move to a new place which didn't feel like home and live with strangers who you'll have to share mom with isn't easy

Anya was nervous too, but for different reasons. She was so excited to meet her soon-to-be sibling! For her, who was an orphan last week, having a pa, a ma and a friend to play with was great

Her expectations went down when she read your mind. You didn't think bad of them, but excited wasn't the word to describe your emotional state either

Loid may not be good at understanding children, but it was clear for him you wasn't comfortable. For him would be weirder if you didn't seem affected at all

On the contrary, Yor seemed cool with all of this to you. Even without any idea of how to be a wife or mother for Anya she enjoyed her time as Forger, which confused you a bit

Yor is happier, not only because she didn't have to worry about the SSS or Yuri anymore. They make her happier, it's just matter of time she could fall for Loid and have a baby that was her own, real kid

Being sure Yor loves you and your new family want you to feel welcomed doesn't make disappear the feelings you carry with. Still, if mom is happy you prefer to keep it to yourself and try to maker her smile too

If it wasn't because Yuri hates the idea of her sister hiding her marriage for a year and sympathized your situation he would have laughed at the irony when you told him during your uncle-nephew walk the next day of his meeting with "Loiloi"

He doesn't know they got married before you attended school so he assumed you had been holding it for a long time. He passed his fingers through your hair

"I understand it's difficult, but I'll be for you whenever you need me"

+ Honorable mention to compensate you for the mild ansgt without warning

Daybreak

We don't know much about him but I included this dork for fun

Thinking about "Daybreak" and "parenthood" makes anyone's mind stopped working

Mainly because it's difficult to say which one would be the child

Not "How you met headcanons" because he wouldn't be able to adopt to begin with

From what we saw in chapter 27 he seems to live alone, depending on his amazing spy career to afford pork steak for dinner. So he must not live too good given that after his first mission he was fired

If he had a child, it would be likely because of a previous relationship he had and didn't end well

He didn't adopt you. You're his biological kid, the only not adopted of this gang

Sorry we can't choose our family good luck ig

Not necessarily ended bad, even remaining as friends, your mother took a different path and is happily married with another man

If she knew he wanted to be a spy either thought "it's a joke" or *sigh*

She was who brought money in the relationship, now you live with her and your step-dad but at the beginning you didn't want to

Daybreak talked with you and promised you could visit each other and even live with him when he could afford it

They don't get it

Who would take care of him? The idea of living on his own was frightening to you

Imagine being father and is your kid who worries about whether pops know how to pay taxes without mom

You took after him in terms of appearance. Any signal of intelligence was from your mother

Average smart but surely smarter than him

Probably he thanked God that you were a boy. He will love whatever you are but he was relieved of saving himself of buying female products when you were on that time of the month and guide you through puberty

As much as he says to be a charming man he's not good with women either so

Your name is Sunny. Guess who chose it

Probably you see him more on weekends than during the week

Until you showed him Spy Wars he didn't have no idea that existed such good series

Of course not cooler than the legend he is but Daybreak jokes about how reading that and seeing your cool pops in action would make you half as good spy as he is someday

Quite sad is that your common sense along with the things you see on TV are enough to be better spy material

You try to watch it with him to see if he learns something

Unsure of what you'll be in the future but in the mean time you had fun watching cartoons and liking kids stuff like dinosaurs and skateboard

Current status: Busy with your first year at school and getting him out of trouble

[gamerwoo]

[Tales from the Pack] Joshua: Second Chance (Part Five)

Characters: Joshua x female reader

Genre/warnings: werewolf au, fantasy, fluff, fluffy angst, Josh is still a grumpy old man

Word count: 2,888

Summary: After his mate died, Joshua always blamed himself and never wanted to imprint again. However, fate has other ideas when he meets you: a young, energetic werecoyote that’s quite the opposite of him. He insists he doesn’t want a new mate – nobody’s even sure if he’s ready for a new one – but he can’t ignore his instincts.

Previous | Next | Second Chance Masterlist

“So how exactly are we supposed to...prepare?” Soomin wondered.

“Prepare what? Prepare how?” Soonyoung asked.

“Well, it’s not like Josh is gonna take this re-imprinting thing well,” Wonwoo shrugged. Ever since the news about Joshua imprinting during his doctor visit, that’s all the pack could really focus on or talk about. But nobody was completely sure when he’d be released, so they wanted to plan things ahead of time. “None of us are really sure what to do when he gets home. He’s probably not going to want to talk about her so do we just not say anything? Do we brace ourselves for him to go back to being angry and reckless?”

“Reckless?” Yeji snorted. “You can’t tell me that old fart was ever reckless.”

“There are tons of stories we could tell you about him doing dumb things, and there’s even more from before he met us,” Seokmin nodded, though he wasn’t about to get into details.

“Even Lilly would tell us stories of how Josh was a menace growing up,” Chan chuckled. “We’ve all seen him act aggressively. He was never really great at managing his anger, even when it--”

“Shut up,” Seungkwan hissed, knowing exactly what Chan was going to say and not wanting to start that conversation up again.

“Is that why the tip of his wolf’s ear is missing?” Suvi wondered.

“Not necessarily,” Soonyoung said with almost a sour tone.

“Okay, but despite all of that,” Minghao began, “do we really need to ‘prepare’ for Shua to come home? If he doesn’t want to talk about her, then he won’t. So then we won’t. Problem solved.”

Except nobody ever thought that Joshua might let the girl he imprinted on tag along back home. He walked in with Seungcheol and Kyung helping him into the house, the pack smiling and telling him how happy they were that he was going to be back to normal. However, Joshua ignored them all, not even sparing them side glances. He just stared forward and grumbled for the two alphas to bring him to his bedroom.

Then Jihoon walked in. He seemed stressed when he lifted his head to address the pack.

“Don’t mention her to Joshua, don’t even talk to either of them if they’re ever in the same room together,” he warned.

“Who?” Junhui asked.

And then Hansol walked in with you as your blue eyes wandered curiously, subtly sniffing the air of this new place. You smelled...a lot of things. But as Hansol had quietly told you on the way there, there were fourteen werewolves living there, along with seven mates. You knew you were going to be bombarded with a lot, but still, you could somehow easily pick up Joshua’s distinct scent above all else.

“Oh…” Jun murmured.

Your eyes then began scanning each face in front of you. You assumed these people must’ve been the pack -- who else would they be?

“This is _____,” Hansol introduced you as if Jihoon didn’t just come in and basically tell the pack to shun you in Joshua’s presence. “She’s a werecoyote.”

“That explains the weird smell...” Jeonghan muttered.

With Joshua upstairs -- Seungcheol came back down with Kyung and reported that he didn’t think Joshua would be leaving his bedroom at least for the rest of the day -- the pack brought you into the living room just to get to know you a little better. Truth be told, they were kind of excited to see what Joshua’s new mate would be like. Would you be like Lilly? Would you be like how Joshua is now?

However, they found you to be...odd. Nice, absolutely, but odd. Living in a cave instead of a home was the biggest red flag, but there were plenty of others. It was like you were raised like an actual coyote rather than a person.

“Didn’t you have a family, _____?” Chan decided to ask. “Parents? Siblings? Anyone to take care of you?”

“Well yeah, but--”

“But, like everyone else, they kicked her out or something,” Joshua’s voice surprised everyone as he appeared in the doorway to the living room. He raised his eyebrows at you. “Am I right? Yeah, so you’re not special.”

“Are we supposed to not talk to her now?” Mingyu barely whispered.

“I can hear you all upstairs, y’know,” the older wolf said as he strolled into the living room and leaned against the arm of one of the couches.

“Shouldn’t you be resting?” Danbi asked.

Joshua just shrugged, not saying anything in response.

“Okay…” Yeji looked away from Joshua and back at you, wanting to get rid of the odd tension that the grumpy werewolf had created. “So _____, how old are you?”

But when you gave them your age, Yeji chuckled at you, “No, I mean how old are you really? Like, how many years have you been alive?”

“Um...th-that many?” you shrugged.

“Figures,” Joshua muttered, “I get stuck with a baby were-creature. It’s like fate fucking hates me more than I thought…”

“Really?” Kyung chuckled, ignoring Josh’s comment. “You’re younger than even me.”

“By a year,” Hansol chuckled, nudging his mate’s knee. “You’re still a baby compared to everyone else.”

“What does that mean?” you wondered.

“Age freezing,” Mingyu replied with a shrug, as if that would be obvious to anyone.

You waited for someone to elaborate, but nobody did, “...What’s that mean?”

Josh let out a dry chuckle, sending a glare your way, “You really don’t know anything, do you?”

Kyung frowned and said something you didn’t understand as she turned her sour expression toward your mate, but he didn’t even seem fazed by whatever she said.

“When you reach a certain age -- usually somewhere between like, eighteen and your mid-twenties -- you stop aging until you find your mate,” Chan explained. “For example, I’m actually twenty-six years older than the age my body stopped aging.”

“But I’m the oldest,” Yeji grinned proudly, “technical and actual age.”

“Bragging about being an old lady isn’t--”

“Watch it,” Jihoon growled, glaring at Joshua, who didn’t get to finish his snide comment.

“Look, Shua. We get you’re in a bad mood -- really, we do,” Seokmin began, seeming almost afraid to stand up to the older wolf, “but...you’re kind of being really mean just in general.”

He let out a deep sigh, “Fine, whatever, I’ll shut up. You can go back to talking about useless stuff.”

“Anyway,” Danbi quickly spoke up, “as we were saying. Even Wonwoo and I seem only a year apart, but he’s actually older than me by...what was it, like, twenty years?”

Her brother nodded, his arm draped around his mate, “Yeah, mom had me at eighteen and then didn’t have you until she was thirty-eight.”

“Wait, what?” Mingyu suddenly spoke up, looking between the siblings with shock written all over his features. “I-- I didn’t even know that.”

Danbi just giggled and shrugged, “Guess I forgot to mention it.”

“So what happened with your family?” you asked the pair.

Wonwoo and Danbi looked back at you again. You hadn’t said a whole lot since being brought to the living room, so whenever you spoke, the pack paid a lot of attention.

“We moved around a lot so nobody would realize I didn’t age,” Wonwoo explained. “They wanted to just kick me out, but they also were afraid that their son suddenly leaving the house would be a big red flag that I was a werewolf. And of course, they couldn’t have people thinking that. They kept me around for a while but they didn’t treat me that great.”

“But they kicked him out when I was fourteen,” Danbi continued. “I was dabbling in potion-making, and they thought it was somehow Wonwoo’s influence. They said he was bad for their precious daughter, so they kicked him out. We’d manage to visit each other, either in town or he’d sneak into my room at night just to talk. When I was finally of age, I went to live with him.”

That wasn’t anything like what happened with you, but you didn’t want to mention it and make it about yourself. You kind of liked absorbing this new information about the pack, anyway. Hearing about them was entertaining in a way.

“Do parents...normally abandon their kids when they find out they’re a werewolf?” you wondered.

“No,” Hansol chuckled. “My parents are super loving and I visit when I can. We still go visit Kyung’s, too.”

“Even Rin’s were super nice before she came to live with us,” Kyung added with a nod.

Your eyebrows furrowed, “Who’s Rin?”

“Kyung came from another pack before joining ours,” Seungcheol explained. “Rin’s one of her old pack mates.”

“Soonyoung refers to her as Cooper, though,” Kyung explained, rolling her eyes. “He thinks her surname is fun to say.”

“Because it is!” Soonyoung insisted before quietly giggling to himself and softly saying, “Cooper...”

“Anyway, you’ll probably meet her...at some point...” Kyung trailed off, so you decided to not ask any questions about her old pack despite being intrigued.

Chan suddenly leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees as he spoke up, “_____, I have a question for you.”

“What is it?”

“Can you shift for us?”

“Ooh, yeah!” Seokmin grinned, excitement in his eyes. “We’ve never seen a werecoyote before!”

Joshua wouldn’t say it, but you could tell even he was intrigued by the way his gaze suddenly locked on you and he just stared, waiting for your response. He didn’t even have anything snarky to say.

"Um,” you shrugged, “yeah, sure.”

-

It was a little awkward just standing in front of a large group of people who just stared at you in wonder, but it was also a little flattering at the same time. Nobody in the pack had ever encountered a werecoyote -- well, other than Yeji -- so they were surprised to see you were really just a smaller, scragglier version of a werewolf.

“I wanna see how fast she really is,” Seungkwan decided before shifting into his wolf form.

So then the pack watched the two of you race from one end of the large yard to the other. You heard someone whistle lowly when you won, followed by the pack’s murmurs of how cool it was that you were faster than them.

And then everyone else wanted a turn to race you -- except Chan because of course he was still the fastest -- so the whole thing just turned into you play-wrestling with a bunch of werewolves. It made you happy, though. You kind of felt like you belonged in their pack.

However, there was still one member of the pack who hadn’t shifted: Joshua. He stood on the porch with the mates, watching as you and the rest of the pack ran around and played with each other. He kept a frown plastered on his face despite the fact he secretly found it endearing that the pack was already getting along with you and vice versa.

But there was still that part of him that didn’t want you in his pack to begin with.

“What’s with the sour look, lover boy?” Yeji quizzed.

Josh merely side-eyed her before going back to watching the pack, “Don’t ask stupid questions if you don’t want a stupid answer.”

“Give it a rest, grumpy,” she scoffed, rolling her eyes. “We all know you don’t actually hate her as much as you want everyone to think.”

“I don’t know...” Suvi began quietly like she was afraid to give her opinion. “I think he just invited her back here because he feels bad for her. Look at how he’s been acting.”

Joshua shifted his weight to one leg, pointing his thumb beside him at the younger girl, “She’s right.”

“No she isn’t,” Danbi chuckled.

“Yeah? And what do you know?”

“For starters, you haven’t stopped staring at her since we got outside,” Eunjin interjected in a plain tone.

“And you can frown all you want but your eyes show everything, Shua” Danbi insisted with a giggle.

Joshua just let out a sigh and rolled his eyes, “Shut up, all of you.”

-

With the sun having set, the pack called it a day and shifted before going back into the house, pulling on their clothes as they talked and laughed with each other. You were toward the back of the group, walking silently as the rest of the pack made playful conversation with each other. You weren’t really sure what was happening next, but you also didn’t want to ask and possibly set Joshua off -- or seem rude asking if you were supposed to leave now or not.

“So, um,” Seungcheol stopped and turned around, pulling his shirt on over his head before he looked at you, “since you’re here and it’s already dark outsi--”

“Don’t even say it,” Joshua grumbled.

Jihoon sighed, rolling his eyes, “Come on, are you really gonna make the poor girl walk home in the dark?”

“She can take care of herself,” he stated, eyeing you up and down -- but there was more of a disgusted look on his face than anything else.

You didn’t really care, though.

“I get she’s a werecoyote, but come on,” Kyung spoke up. “She almost died to begin with because she was running around at night.”

“Wait, really?” Junhui asked.

After the rest of the pack started getting on his case -- especially after learning that new information -- Josh let out a loud groan, letting his head drop back, “Fine!”

His tone actually made you flinch -- not because you were afraid, but the loudness startled you. 

He lifted his head, his golden eyes landing on you, and you raised your eyebrows. He narrowed his eyes, “You can stay on the couch for the night.”

You visibly perked up, “Couch? Like, the one in the living room?”

“Um...yeah?"

“Really?!” you grinned. You were practically bouncing with excitement. “Thank you so much!”

“It’s...just a couch...” Chan said slowly, not understanding what you were so happy about. 

Seungcheol nodded his head toward the living room, “C’mon. We’ll find some extra blankets for you.”

“I think you’re forgetting her usual sleeping space,” Jia pointed out quietly as the pack began to walk down the hallway again to start going to their separate rooms.

That was when it clicked. Of course you were excited to sleep on a couch, you lived in a cave. Your typical bed was probably not the most comfortable thing. They imagined it was probably either the cave floor, or maybe a bed of leaves and grass. A couch would definitely be a huge upgrade for you.

As you beamed watching Seokmin and Seungcheol work to set up a makeshift bed for you on the couch, Joshua silently and slowly approached you.

“Have you...ever slept on a bed before?” he wondered.

You looked at him and shrugged with a small nod, “Not for a really long time, though. It’s been...”

You trailed off as you tried to do some math in your head, but you genuinely couldn’t remember when it was you last slept in a bed. You couldn’t even remember what age you were when you left home. Things started blurring together.

“I don’t know how many years, but it’s been a long time,” you shrugged.

Years? God, why did you have to tug at Joshua’s heart when he was trying to be cold and push you away? You just had to have a tragic life story, didn’t you?

After a moment of listening to Seungcheol and Seokmin bicker about which way the sheet was supposed to go, Joshua let out a deep sigh, “Y’know what? Just go take my bed. I’ll figure this out since you two are too dense to figure out a fucking bedsheet.”

To say you were shocked was an understatement. You looked at Josh with wide eyes and raised eyebrows, blinking as you waited for him to take the statement back. Even the pack froze and waited to see if he was just playing some dumb prank on you to get your hopes up.

Joshua turned his head to look at you when you didn’t move, “I’m sorry, was I speaking a different language?”

You knew it was sarcasm, but you still replied with a simple, “No.”

“Then why are you just standing there?”

Kyung groaned, saying something in another language under her breath before she stepped forward, “Come on, I’ll show you were to go since Shua’s too busy being an asshole.”

You followed the foreign wolf out of the room and up the stairs to where Joshua’s room was, and then she tracked down some pajamas to fit you and helped you get settled.

Meanwhile, downstairs, the pack was still looking at Joshua. However, they were all smirking or wearing some sort of shit-eating grin.

“Nice excuse,” Yeji snorted.

Josh grimaced, “What?”

“We all know it wasn’t because dumb and dumber were taking too long,” Jeonghan smirked, shaking his head as Seungcheol and Seokmin called out in offence. “You felt bad and you care about her.”

“You liiiiiiike her,” Danbi sang.

Joshua rolled his eyes before he walked up to Seokmin and snatched the sheet from him, making the younger wolf flinch.

“Just get the hell out of my room,” he growled.

[scmsdivinecultists]

What your fave SCM god says about you

I read one psychology article and now I’m all knowing. Hope at least one of these points apply to you simps

If your favourite is Leon, you are one of the following:

Youngest child

Outcast or the “popular” kid

Daddy issues

Your childhood dream was either to be royalty or be rich

You hyperfixate to many things

You might say ur not charismatic but you’ve had at least more than 1 person you rejected a love confession to

“You’re wrong, I’m right, shut up.”

You don’t fall in love easily but once you do, you fall hard

You like smug bastards or you have a bondage fantasy

Your favourite voltage game is one of the following: Kissed by the Baddest Bidder, Court of Darkness, Masquerade’s Kiss, or Kings of Paradise

You have fairy lights in your room filled with pictures or posters

You had a massive friend group but at least 5 people have left from then to now

You cling onto memories like they’re a lifeline

You have the latest phone or more than 3 leisure electronics

If your favourite is Scorpio:

You can’t be any taller than 5′6

You probably listen to bands and can’t go anywhere without your headphones

Really creative

Your favourite Shakespeare play was Hamlet or Macbeth

Have had or is going through an emo phase

Hates writing essays

Have 3 best friends max

You have definitely bought albums, posters, or merch of your faves

ur probably a weeb

you’ve broken a bone or you’re very knowledgeable in the medical field/how to harm the human body for some reason

dark humour is the best humour

Your friends are very concerned for you because of said humour

You like watching people play Monopoly bc of the chaos

into so many fandoms that you know the lore of your faves more than you know the material you learn at school

If your favourite is Teorus:

You are an only or youngest child

Spoiled

Daddy/Mommy issues

Abandonment issues

You feel like you fade into the background/don’t contribute much to the group

You feel like you are often forgotten

You’re close with your cousins

You probably have a pet

Taylor Swift or 1D for life

Have definitely threatened to kill or beat someone up despite you intimidating no one

You want to play an important role but you are so not the leader type

You like Ouran Host Club

You like the outdoors

You probably like To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before

Your favourite disney princess is Rapunzel or Cinderella

If your favourite is Huedhaut:

You are definitely a romantic

You’re not an air sign (Gemini, Aquarius, or Libra)

You’re a moron or you make bad decisions and Hue is there to help balance that out

Chances are you read more fanfic than actual books

Your system is 70% caffeine

For some reason you have lots of random trivia

Have you considered therapy for your suppressed trauma?

Dungeons and Dragons fan

You’re really into alcohol or you despise it

Loyalty is the trait you admire most

You want to feel like a sassy and classy bitch but you gave up after 2 days

Your favourite ship trope is enemies to lovers or slow burn

A lot of pent up angst but you hide it 

you put other people > yourself bc you don’t want them to make the same mistakes you did

Why do you have so many memes saved?

Why do you have reaction pictures for everything?

If your favourite is Dui:

You’re probably not into guys

FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT

Either you’re a precious sunshine child or you are the most fucked up human in your friend circle

You have a choking kink

You either take sides in fights or you’re the middle ground

You make lots of threats but no one is acc taking them seriously

You probably are a massive manipulator

You’re psychotic and have violent tendencies 

Your best friend lives far away from you/ you have an internet friend that gets you more than your IRL ones

You say honesty is the best policy but you lie the most

Everyone comes to you for advice but you think you’re the most mentally unstable

You have identity issues and u change ur mind all the time 

Whatever you were as a kid, you’re probably the opposite of that now

If your favourite is Ichthys:

You are attached to the characters with the most trauma

You must not be a clean freak or your room is equally as messy as Ikky’s

Oldest or middle child (either way u have siblings) 

Never got to go to an amusement park as a kid 

Want attention/didn't get enough attention as a kid

You want Ichthys’ parents to adopt u bc they are the family stability you crave

Unresolved trauma and definitely not mentally stable 

You liked dinosaurs as a kid

You had pet fish as a kid and they all died bc you overfed them

Using anything else to escape ur reality 

Cartoons > real life actors

Probably hate seafood or afraid of the sea (ironic as it is)

Nostalgia is your best friend

Hurt/Comfort is your favourite AO3 tag

You collect random shit or you have a memory box

You are the reason child leashes were invented

You got into real dangerous situations as a kid and you’re wondering how you lived through that

Your comfort characters all got it the worst or are dead

If your favourite is Zyglavis:

How are those high expectations treatin ya? 

You either want to get into medical, sciences, or law

When you were younger you got enrolled in extra classes (swimming, piano, ballet, etc)

Your parents encouraged creativity until you got older and they told you to choose a more “realistic” goal

Good grades = everything and you’ll pull all-nighters to finish tasks or assignments

Former gifted student 

The actual smart kid in class 

YOU HAVE SELF ESTEEM/CONFIDENCE ISSUES

80s are not good enough for you or your parents

Overachiever for any reason 

Sleep? What is sleep?

A dom or a brat

You have strict parents or you have had pretty loose rules growing up

You had a lot of friends in grade school and now you have like 4 friends

You are no longer human, you’re just a walking husk of stress

If your favourite is Krioff:

You want to fuck one of Krioff’s family members

You have siblings

A pyromaniac or deathly afraid of fire

Commitment issues

You watch or ur a sports fan

You own an iPhone 6

You’ve ate forbidden items or you’ve thought about it (the fish tank pebbles, erasers, glass, slime, etc)

Everyone thinks you’re the awkward kid but no you’re just shy

You actually like the ocean waves

Once people get to know you, they got a whole thing coming for them

You either suck at driving or can’t drive

A great listener but you don’t feel like you give good advice

Conflict is a no no for you

You definitely had a glow up

You’ve befriended the seniors growing up

You either don’t like kids or you love them

You have a sweet tooth and everyone questions how you are not diabetic with the amount of sweets you’ve consumed

If your favourite is Aigonorus:

You’re either an insomniac or a hypersomniac. Whichever one, you don’t know how much sleep is enough sleep

You’re probably a sub

Commitment or abandonment issues

Desperate for validation and appreciation

touch/love/attention starved

You have a stuffed animal collection or you still have those childhood stuffed animals

You love the idea of love but you are not ready to deal with breakups

You wish you didn’t care but you care too much

Your aesthetic is cutecore

Probably into maid cat boys

Studio Ghibli or Sanrio stan

Comfort > style anyday

You only own sneakers nothing else

If your favourite is Partheno:

You’re definitely not into just guys 

You’re a drama kid and you are here for the tea whether it involves you or not

you have the receipts for everything

You were the one kid that played “family” or “house” every recess

no one knows where you get all your cute shit but it serves

have been suspected of witchcraft or considered the dark arts

Stole makeup from your fam as a kid and played with it

HIDE THE TRAUMA. HIDE THE PAST.

You already have a senior quote picked out

You’re either really horny or you just want to cry over how much you love so and so

“Why do men-”

You really want to own that Partheno doll in that one CG

Your most used social media app is Instagram or Snapchat

Your favourite demon brother from Obey Me is most likely Asmodeus 

If your favourite is Tauxolouve:

Your favourite KBTBB guy is either Baba or Mamo

You’re into music or theatre

Your ideal date is to go to an opera or a museum

You say you like/dislike something but end up changing ur mind later or when you try it out

In your opinion, the music nowadays is just not it

You recently found a receipt from Walmart for something you bought 5 months ago

Anniversaries are important

When making decisions, you pick the worst possible one

Your most expensive clothing items are your shoes or jewelry

You wish you could attend a ball and marry into royalty, like Cinderella

You like the idea of soulmates or string of fate 

Obviously or secretly insecure/self deprecating but you’ll raise all hell if your loved ones talk shit abt themselves

You want your partner to propose first

You like the underrated characters or your favourite characters are unappreciated

If your favourite is Karno you are:

You have childhood trauma, some of you are just not aware of it

You’re the parent of the group

You enjoy ships that have a mom/dad dynamic

Either you’re banned from the kitchen or you’re the one banning people from the kitchen

You were threated with the slipper or you threaten with the slipper

As a kid, you enjoyed Dora or Ni Hao Kai Lan

Your favourite trope is the found family trope

Either you’re an example to your family or you keep getting compared to other kids

An angel around the family but a chaotic bastard with others

You’re probably into some really kinky shit

You like Dangonronpa

Spiritual or religious

Probably had an imaginary friend 

You decided you were gonna turn your life around after reading/watching something and went back to the hot mess you were in 3 days

[davekat-sucks]

as someone who doesn't like Eridan I am curious as to why he is your favorite character.

Part of it is his design that really stands out from most of the other characters. Eridan is quite more fashionable than Kanaya. He at least show more emphasis on him being the respective violetblood he takes pride in, while also wearing blue, another color that is related to highblood status. As well as blue being part of a violet shade. Though if you try to tell him vviolets are blue, he will damn correct you that vviolets are vviolets. Learn your damn colors! Another is a bit of his personality. He is a douche, a tool. A violetblood who takes advantage of being high privileged and will put others down beneath him, because the hemospectrum says so. He is more racist than Equius. He is the perfect example of what a troll should be and how trolls should act. Too many fantroll OCs go for the more revolutionary against Alternia or being the "nicer" troll. But no one tries to be racist to lowbloods like a rustblood or bronze. No highblood fans themselves with their money or seen to enjoy living a luxurious lifestyle. He is the OG real deal of what it is like if someone is born under Her Imperious Condescesion's ruling. The only thing that he does have a fear that even he cannot escape as a highblood, was the pailing. Basically, he needs to fuck with someone or he dies, because Eridan did not contribute to help repopulate his race. It's already bad enough sea dwellers are rare to come by and his quadrants are empty as hell. Despite being the rich kid, Eridan craves for attention, whether be red romance or black hatred. Any one of those would be able to please him, if it meant it could comfort his ease of loneliness. The way he approaches could be seen as creepy, but at least Eridan is honest about his feelings. He doesn't dance around or lie hard to those close to him. It's that same advice of being direct that he tells to Kanaya, because she will not get Vriska's attention that way. It's also why he can't kill land dwellers. He wants to have good relationships with them. It's that same relationship that shows he his a hypocrite. The dude rants about being a sea dweller and wanting to kill all land dwellers. But he never acts on it. He only commissions people to build doomsday devices, but never makes one himself. Eridan spends most of his time on land than at sea, as Feferi points out. He has an interests in wizards, but doesn't believe in magic. That's a bit of parallel of Rose's interest to write yaoi wizard fics, but she dislikes wizards themselves because of her mother's encouragement of her hobby (though Rose was over analyzing her intentions, she did not realize Mom Lalonde did care about her well being despite Sburb going to happen). The man collects various weapons, but his main strife specibus is his rifle. We don't actually know if he uses the harpoons, spears, or other weapons he has collected in his hive. It could relate to Eridan's interest in military history and wanting to be like said general figures and dictators. But we rarely see him gather some army or actually trying to lead like one. He is all glub and no bite. It's sort of interesting that he is flawed. And of course, we cannot address about his actions in Murderstuck. You can sort of sympathize with him in some way. He lost his moirail, he has no other friends left, his home planet is destroyed, and this big bad Jack Noir is going to kill them. With Alternia gone, anything like hemospectrum or highblood lowblood status, don't mean SHIT if they have to abandon it. That means, Eridan has nothing left on himself. All of this happened as he was still a TEENAGER. The poor fish was feeling hopeless and his actions were caused by his own emotions. It's different from Gamzee, who can be seen controlled by Caliborn/Lord English or was willing to follow to help for his cause. Different from Vriska, as she wants to be seen as the big hero by raising the stakes even higher than before. I sort of wished that he could have faced Gamzee in some way during that x3 showdown combo, since their aspects are complementary towards each other. It would also be

fitting he gets revenge for Dualscar's death, by killing the descendant of the Grand Highblood. He and Vriska could have worked together one last time against the clown. Part of me also jokingly thinks Eridan would try to convince Vriska to take him to Jack in order to serve him. It's sort of a question of how exactly Eridan would get Jack Noir's attention. It is never explained how, even when Feferi and Sollux agreed they have to stop him. Would he fire his wwand to make a signal beam to get Jack to fly over? Would he asks Vriska to deliver himself to the man? No one knows, but either way, his surrender out of fear could be seen as dumb and cowardly. Sucks that he got killed by end of Act 5. But probably for the best he stayed dead, so that his character wasn't ruined from Act 6 to Pesterquest. His character not doing much as a sprite was one of the worst offenses. He really could have helped Jake about his Hope powers, but every dead troll there was shafted aside. At least let FEFPETASPRITE TALK. Don't use her as a joke, just because Hussie doesn't want to do Feferi and Nepeta's quirk in one chatlog! Then there's the half assed "redemption" joke bit from Epilogues and the ridiculous gender arc by retconning Eridan's backstory and forgetting about another character's relation with his lusus. Because WhatPumpkin don't want him to be a racist, rich creep asshole. And yet, it's why I love him. Eridan is one flawed, tragic villain. Maybe I just have a weird interests in douchebags who try so hard to be liked or acknowledged of being superior by putting others down to push their own pride, but with the way that has been set for Eridan, sort of makes sense to me that he would do all these actions. It's fucked up, but I can't blame him for being put in that kind of situation. Being a kid and growing up, it's hard and nobody understands. His life was an Ugly Story.

[sailtoafarawayland]

Living a Life (1/2)

Summary: Sometimes the things we see ourselves in most clearly aren’t made from glass, and sometimes death is not the ending we think it is, but a pause of breath that gives life to a new beginning.   

Rating: T for now

AO3 - FF

Chapter 1

Emma didn't really know why she did it, why she stopped at all.

The sidewalks were an icy mess, like the city didn't even care that they were staring a lawsuit in the face, and the clean, shoveled pathway through the cemetery  was just too tempting to pass up. She was exhausted after a day spent at the precinct with her latest collar – some sort of mix up with the payment, or the filing, or whatever nonsense it was this time – and she just wanted to get home.

She didn't like the thought of using the cemetery as a shortcut, but the thought of being out of work for two weeks while she recovered from a sprained ankle was even worse.

Maybe it was because she walked past so many other gravestones that had been recently dusted of snow, the past few days of New England weather not accumulating on top of them, brushed away by the hands of loved ones. Maybe it was because she saw the wreaths leftover from Christmas dotting the quiet cemetery, bright orbs of red peeking through snow sprinkled like icing sugar across them.

But she stopped in front of a gravestone that seemed lonelier than the rest, slightly removed from the path and resting beneath one of the many bare trees, days of hardened snow and ice frozen to its surface.

Looking at it – neglected, ignored – she wondered if that's what her grave would look like when she died.

She should probably get cremated.

She should probably just leave. She had no business here, staring at some stranger's grave like the person lying below it cared about anything – cared that no one had stopped to sweep off the snow, but she didn't.

Instead, she stepped off the clean, salted path and crunched through layers of icy snow, deeper than she had thought. She could feel it crumbling over the tops of her low boots, icy pebbles melting and trickling down her heel. Well, she was stuck for it now.

She crouched down in front of the gravestone, and raising one gloved hand, she began brushing the frozen chunks of snow from its shoulders. Removing the dusting of windblown ice from the engraved front proved to be more work than she had anticipated, but after a few minutes she had most of it cleared, the rest would just have to melt on its own. Her hard work rewarded, she finally took the time to read the face of the stone.

She hadn't been to any funerals in her life, but she knew enough that the brevity of what she saw surprised her.

Liam Jones, 1977 – 2011

Her breath left her body, a chill wind stirring her hair and leaving her feeling somehow exposed, like she was doing something she shouldn't be - peering through the window of someone’s life only to find it was an empty house, abandoned. She had expected an old gravestone, someone with no family left to come sit by them and wipe away the snow.

She hadn't been expecting this.

He was young, not much older than her, and since it was only February, it hadn't even been that long since he'd passed. She glanced at the frozen ground she was squatting above and moved hastily to the side, wondering if there was some kind of graveyard etiquette. There must be. Don't stand in front of the graves where people are...resting, she guessed. She wasn't really sure. She'd never had a family, a grave to visit.

She probably should be thankful for that, less heartache.

Snow removed, job done, she stuck her hand back in her pocket and headed down the path. She wouldn't be back again. He wasn't her family, whoever she was, and she wanted to leave the nagging fear that one day that might be her in the cemetery where it belonged.

Weeks passed and she told herself when she headed down the cemetery path again that it was because another big storm had just blown through Boston, and for some reason known only to the city, they never cleared or salted the sidewalks in this neighborhood.    

But she didn't try to stop herself when she reached his grave again, this time the name Liam Jones clearly visible, a thick blanket of fresh snow cushioning the top. She walked between the first row of graves and to the side of his, taking care not to step where she assumes he's buried. It seemed like the right way to go about it, even if there aren't any rules. She probably should've googled it, but she hadn't planned on coming back.

She really hadn't.

Instead of questioning it too much, she brushed the snow away with her sleeve and tossed a few stray, fallen twigs back to the ground. It wasn't until after she'd thrown them that she thought to make sure she hadn't dropped them onto another resting place – littering on dead people was most definitely poor graveyard etiquette.

When she stopped in spring, she told herself it was just to enjoy the blossoms on the cherry trees that blanket that portion of the cemetery, knowing it was a lie. She knew because she'd bothered to look up cemetery etiquette online, and yes, it was a thing. She was also mildly curious to see if anyone had been to visit him now that the weather was nicer, if she would even be able to tell.  

There were a few graves she'd passed that had small flowers gracing their shoulders, and others with ornate vases built into the stone, colorful blooms filling them. She brushed a scattering of cherry blossoms from the top of Liam's grave and wondered again at the emptiness of it. He must not have had anyone, because if he had, surely they would have written something other than just the year of his birth and death.

Was he a father, a brother? Was he a son? Was he alone, as she was?

“Who were you?” she asked, but no one answered.

The next time she passed through, the cherry trees had long since lost their blooms, and she swept the sickly sweet smelling remains of them from his grave, bending down to tug out the stray clumps of tall grass where the granite sat, immovable. It seemed pretty obvious no one else was visiting, and that not even the groundskeeper had enough hours in the day to really keep everything neat.

They'd had enough dry days that she didn't have to crouch to visit, and found herself sitting back onto the grass between his gravestone and the next.

“Is this...weird?” she asked, glancing around to make sure no one was listening to her talk to a dead person she didn't even know. “I'm sorry no one comes here but me.”

Suddenly she felt self-conscious, the whole situation settling heavily around her, the overpowering perfume of dying flowers clinging to her skin. What the hell was wrong with her that the only connection she'd allow herself was with some stranger's gravestone? Angry with herself, she jumped up and hurried back down the path towards home. She was out of the cemetery and an entire block away when she finally remembered the daisies in her bag. Reaching in, she brushed the crumpled edges of the petals and sighed.

There was another visitor a few graves down when she returned, but they clearly knew enough to not eyeball her or say anything when she walked back over to Liam's grave – mildly flustered – and gently placed the rumpled cluster of flowers on the ledge in front of his name. She brushed her hands roughly on her leather sleeves and left as quickly as she came.

The next time it was a lot easier to talk to him, even if she knew he wasn't listening, and he certainly couldn't talk back. The daisies hadn't lasted very long, so she tossed them and said she'd bring more next time, although she realized she may need to leave something other than flowers. Work had been slow lately, and she wasn't stopping at the precinct all that often to drop off skips – and she couldn't just make a special trip once a week to refresh his flowers.

That would be crazy.

She didn't even know him.

So when her fingers ran across the smooth ridges of the seashell on her windowsill at home, she put it in her pocket.

Spring faded into the suffocating heat of summer, the grass parched and brittle beneath her feet as she crouched next to Liam's grave, brushing away the small ant hills that had formed in the sandy soil with a vengeance she didn't know she had in her for the tiny creatures.

“You know,” she said, and the words hurt before they even left her mouth, “you might be the only person I've got to talk to. How pathetic is that?”

She worked around the back of the grave, tugging up stray weeds she'd missed the last time.

“I brought you something other than flowers. Maybe you weren't even a flower guy, when you were around. I'm not much of a flower girl, I don't think. I've never really had anyone to buy them for me though. There was Neal...but he...well, let's just say he didn't leave me with any good memories, let alone flowers. Is there anyone who has good memories of you? I wish I knew some. It would be nice to know who you were, not just sit here guessing.”

The cemetery was empty, and that's when Emma felt most at ease, most like she could just say what was on her mind without having to worry about anyone listening, or whether they think she's crazy.

She laid the scraggly bunch of weeds at the side of the grave, reminding herself to take it out to the trash can when she leaves.

“Here,” she shrugged, pulling the seashell from her pocket and placing it on the ledge where she last left flowers.

It was a spiral shell, small, but perfect and white with a soft, amber colored center.

“I don't know if you really like seashells either, but...I picked that up a few years ago down at the beach. In the summer, it's always full of families and couples, so I don't go much, but sometimes when it's a little grey and stormy...it's just the most peaceful place to sit and think.”

She didn't say the rest of what she was thinking aloud – that seeing the happy couples and the parents with their kids just made her stomach clench, that all she could think of was how that was never something her mom wanted to go with her.

– was never something she got the chance to do.

That feels like too much to unload, even on a dead guy.

“It's pretty peaceful here too,” she sighed.

Summer relented and fall crept into the city, the once green leaves crisping and drifting to the ground. Despite getting a payday, she was leaving the precinct in a pretty shitty mood. Her skip had almost given her the slip, and she was going to be nursing a bruised shoulder from where she tumbled in an alley trying to keep up with him. By the time she stepped through the archway of the cemetery, the sun had already set, the streetlamps casting cold halos across the damp ground. She heard them before she saw them, and it took her a few seconds to realize they'd gathered just off the path next to Liam's grave.

“Hey!” she snapped, immediately angered by what she was seeing. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Christ, relax, lady,” one of the kids drawled, taking a swig from his beer and clinking it against the gravestone next to Liam's.

Emma didn't know who it belonged to, but it was always well cared for, and she was furious. There were four kids, teenagers, and they'd stomped all over the damp ground in front of the graves, clearly not caring that they were drinking and walking all over someone's remains.

“Look, kid, you and your buddies have about ten seconds to take your crap and get the hell out of here. I just left the precinct, and I've got Chief Humbert on speed dial – ” They didn't need to know how untrue that was, that, in fact, the guy gave her the creeps “ – so I suggest you take your party somewhere else.”

A few eye rolls and snarky comments later and they'd cleared out, leaving Emma feeling both pleased and worried for herself. She plopped down next to Liam's grave, wincing as her palm hit a piece of broken glass.

“Little shits,” she hissed, pulling the chunk of glass from her hand and setting it aside. It was too dark to find all the pieces. “What the hell am I doing?”

She leaned forward and straightened the seashell that was still resting on the stone, glad it had survived Boston's vagrant youths for this long. Wet leaves stuck to the front and sides of the grave, and she pulled off a few that hid his name.

“That's going to be me one day,” she muttered, eyeing the paltry engraving once more. “Emma Swan, time stamp. I'll be lucky if anyone comes to chase delinquents away from my grave.”

Everything was wet and cold, the smell of decomposing leaves rich in the air, and while fall made most people think of pumpkins and Thanksgiving, warm cups of coffee on cold walks – right now she could only think about how dark and cold and oppressively heavy it must be six feet under.

The next time she visited, she left a little fist-sized pumpkin she'd picked up at the bodega. She'd thought about carving it, what with Halloween around the corner, but that was never something she'd done before, and if she messed it up, she'd have nothing.

It didn't take long for the pumpkin to turn into a Thanksgiving feast for the city's squirrels, barely more than a rind left behind like something someone had tossed into the garbage, and she felt bad. She should have come back sooner.

“Sorry,” she mumbled, removing the half-frozen leftovers and pulling the few stray weeds with enough gumption to grow in later November. “Looks like you had quite a bit of furry company while I was gone. If I were a normal person, I'd be home sharing a Thanksgiving meal with my family, or friends – but I don't have either of those, so here I am, talking to you. Happy Thanksgiving, Liam.”

It wasn't long after the first snow hit Boston, and Emma was reminded of that first time she visited the cemetery and wondered who Liam Jones had been, why no one stopped to visit his grave. She could have googled him, but if she was being honest with herself – which she was really trying to be better about these days – she didn't really want to know if he had family that couldn't be bothered to visit. If she didn't know, she couldn't be angry with them for no reason, since she had no right to be.

She didn't know Liam Jones.

She had no right to bear a grudge for him.

As Christmas approached, Emma saw more people visiting, sometimes with family, and other times alone, leaving little battery powered tea lights and wreaths to warm the cold stone. When she saw the bouquet of poinsettias at the bodega, she didn't feel the least bit strange as she placed it on the counter. There aren't any Christmas decorations in her apartment, but she felt like Liam should have something to show that at least one person was thinking about him on the first Christmas he was missing.  

The air was bitter and cold as she made the trek though from her neighborhood to the cemetery, but she didn't mind. When she reached Liam's grave, there was a soft blanket of fresh snow atop it, and she brushed it gently to the ground.

“You know, I really should thank you,” she said quietly, glad for the peace and solitude that hung around her. It made it easier to say the words. “I felt like maybe I was doing something nice for you, remembering you in the way I would want someone to think about me, just so that I wasn't completely forgotten, but I feel like coming here...shit, it'll be a year in a couple months. I think I figured something out. I don't want to be alone, Liam. I know I can't guarantee that I won't be alone one day in the ground, with no one left to care, but...I don't want to feel that way now. I've always kept people at a distance, too afraid to get hurt again, but I'm tired of being alone. I want a life, I want to live it...”

There was no answer, but she hadn't been expecting one.

Instead she leaned down and brushed the snow off the little ledge that still held her seashell, frozen to the stone, and gently placed the poinsettias beside it. She reached out and traced her finger along the carved edge of his name before turning to leave, glancing up at the blue sky between the bare branches of the cherry tree.

“If you're, uh, listening anywhere, well, thanks for everything, Liam. Merry Christmas.”

~ * ~ * ~

When Killian woke, it felt like he was being dragged from the bottom of the sea, every force on earth weighing him down still not enough to keep his blissful, dark peace from being disturbed.

Once the light hit him, it wasn't like in the movies. He didn't wake up groggy, or wondering where he was, confused about the machines beeping around him and the tubes connected to his body.

No, he knew exactly where he was and what led him here, and he wanted nothing more than to sink back down to that darkness that was so complete and starving it devoured every thought before he could think it. He wanted to close his eyes and fall back into that oblivion that had been his only respite from the flashes of memory, the pull of voices.

He didn't want to have to remember the sound that steel makes when it cracks and groans, the way the dock shook beneath their feet as the freighter slid into the crane, the sheer force of it toppling the massive tower of heavy steel as easily as if it were nothing more than a house of cards. He wanted to forget running for his brother, watching the mass of cables and metal come down over them – screaming, screaming his name and trying to reach him, unable to move, unable to breathe...

“Can you hear me? My name is Dr. Whale.”

The voice was leaning over him, his mouth moving, more words floating around him. Killian didn't understand why they wouldn't just leave him alone – he tried to roll onto his side, ignoring the the objections from the doctor, and that's when he felt it – a pain that burned up his arm and into his brain, as if his hand had been crushed by his movement. He jerked his arm, trying to understand what he'd done, why it hurt so badly – and then he saw it.

The bandages, the stump, the strangely shortened arm that most definitely used to have a hand at the end of it – except now there was nothing, and it couldn't possibly be his arm he was looking at, his hand that was missing, because he could feel it. The agony was so real it eclipsed everything else – the pain in his ribs and elsewhere vanishing as he thrashed and tore out lines and catheters.

There were hands on him, holding him – voices shouting, someone screaming. He was screaming, but it was so far away, a sea of darkness rising between him and the place where his hand wasn't, cradling and dragging him back down to that deep oblivion where there was nothing.

Nothing at all.  

Tagging: @justanother-unluckysoul @kmom0f4 @the-darkdragonfly @teamhook @zaharadessert @xarandomdreamx @jrob64 @wefoundloveunderthelight @tiganasummertree @pirateprincessofpizza @lfh1226-linda @alexa-fangirl-forever @alifeofdreams @superchocovian @donteattheappleshook @hollyethecurious @caught-in-the-filter @snowbellewells @itsfabianadocarmo

[itsclydebitches]

Hey, this is old question but why do you think Raven left Yang? We never get an explicit answer but why would Raven accept the bird powers from Ozpin, decide to have a baby with Taiyang but leave soon after? Especially when this is before Summer died and Ruby was born. Personally I feel like we should have seen Raven in V7-8 because Yang's arc with her just feels so unresolved.

Yeah, it does feel pretty unresolved right now. However, based on what we have gotten and what we know about Raven, I personally headcanon: 

She'd have accepted the powers no matter what, once they were offered. Raven, by her own admission, has a survival of the fittest mentality going on. The strong survive, the weak die, and therefore anything that has the potential to make her stronger is automatically something to grab hold of, no matter the cost (example: killing the Spring Maiden. Power equals worth taking a life). Whether Raven took the bird powers with an intention to use them for good, only to abandon that desire once she learned of Salem's immortality, or whether she always had one foot out the back door, ready to abandon Ozpin's cause at the slightest whiff of real danger, the result is still the same: hell yeah an ability that allows her to spy on others, escape bad situations easily, etc. She’ll take it. Personally, I lean towards the latter option. We learn that she and Qrow entered Beacon with the intention of killing huntsmen later and there's almost nothing, to my mind, to suggest that Raven turned away from those views as Qrow did. Not when she so passionately returned to the tribe and took up activities that, although indirectly via grimm, absolutely kill huntsmen. I think Raven played the part of a good little Beacon student, was a decent enough actor and fighter to become a member of Ozpin’s inner circle (benefited by Ozpin’s own tendency to trust/see the best in others, as well as being part of a team made up of Good Guys), happily accepted a HUGELY beneficial bit of magic, and then said, "So long, suckers" when things actually got tough. If Summer hadn't disappeared and Raven had never learned about Salem? Maybe she would have stayed long term, doing the work of a huntress with a few extra war missions on the side. But an immortal enemy who may have killed a teammate? Way too dangerous for Raven's liking. I think she cares about others to a certain extent - years of friendship, a relationship with Tai, and crying beside Yang all point to that - but I don't think that care has ever overridden her own self-interest. If it had, she wouldn't have allowed Vernal to take on the risk of being the Maiden instead of her. If it had, she wouldn't have allowed Yang to take on the risk of the Relic instead of her. If she had, she wouldn't have left not just Yang as her mother, but everyone once she realized how much danger they were all in. Raven puts herself first, always.

Which I think is the explanation for Yang too. We don't know that she decided to have a baby with Tai, we just know that she did have a baby. Accidental pregnancies happen, pregnancies where the father wants the child but the mother doesn't happen, pregnancies where the mother is chill with it at first but once the child is born decide this isn't for them happen... and in Remnant terms, pregnancies where the mother learns more about the war she’s in during those nine months and only then decides to bail could happen too. There are a lot of possibilities here. Personally, being pro-choice and all, I'm of the opinion that Raven is not a horrific person for leaving Yang, more-so due to... everything else she's done lol. Would it be great if life worked in a way where every mother was emotionally ready to parent a child and never ever had one unless they were? Of course! Is that realistic? Not by a longshot. Raven did the Remnant equivalent of giving her kid up for adoption, except actual adoption wasn't needed because the father was in the picture and quite obviously wanted to keep the kid. So Raven has Yang - carries the pregnancy to full term for whatever reason she and/or Tai may have had. Hell, we don’t even know if abortions exist in Remnant - and then wipes her hands of things. If I remember correctly (outside of the comics anyway) Raven really does keep completely out of Yang's life from then on. Summer is her mom. Raven was just the biological parent. For however horrible Raven is in other respects, she had the right to let Summer and Tai raise Yang instead. She stepped out of her life, seemingly unaware that Tai said little about her, resulting in a Yang who grew desperate to find out any scrap about her "real" mom, tracking Raven down despite Raven keeping her distance. But all of this is a long-winded way of saying that Raven never struck me as someone interested in motherhood. We don't know why she decided to have Yang, but once she did... what's a self-serving bandit going to do with a newborn? Unless Raven had decided to raise Yang as a totally loyal second or something, a baby is a danger. A liability. Children, until capable of defending themselves in Remnant, are grimm magnets who provide nothing except love which, as established, Raven doesn't prioritize. She cares about things that will keep her alive, not things that make that life emotionally rich. A child is a wonderful addition... provided you care about that bond more than you care about the effort and, in Remnant's case, the danger a child poses. Raven doesn't seem the type for me. 

So I imagine our timeline is something like:

Raven joins Beacon with an intent to learn how to kill huntsmen

Over four years Qrow changes his views. Maybe she does too, though not as much

Ozpin offers magic (magic!!) to help in this war and Raven grabs the chance to become more powerful with both hands

She has a relationship with Tai

Has Yang, for whatever reasons of her own

Goes back to run her tribe, perhaps already pulling out of the war, or perhaps with one foot still in the door. Either way, she’s not about being a mother 

At some point Summer disappears. This may have clued Raven even more into how dangerous this war is

Finds out about Salem, perhaps via the mysterious missing Jinn question (or others like the Spring Maiden and Lionheart found out from that and Raven learned second-hand)

Completely nopes out of the war from here on out, if she hadn’t 100% left already, because she's all about survival and you definitely don't survive by fighting an immortal enemy. This includes eliminating all contact with her team and family, outside of getting info from Qrow

Gets ahold of the Spring Maiden at some point, killing her to make herself even more powerful 

Is approached by her daughter for a portal and tries to talk some "sense" into her, much like she occasionally does with Qrow 

Joins up with the baddies in an effort to keep herself safe from Salem

Realizes the Relic is actually a danger, so let's Yang have it instead

Goes to Tai for either unknown reasons, or just escaping the vault via his portal, with no intention of stopping to say hi

But if she did, she no doubt had some reason that involved keeping herself safe

All of which is taken with a grain of salt given RWBY’s, uh... less than logical timeline lol 

[lokahjarta]

You speak of Loki but how did you find Loki and how did you being to commune with Loki to where it was feeling so real to you that you knew things were going to be good working with this diety? Do you also find any other norse gods appealing that you would reach out to as well?

The answer is that where I am now comes from a long road of work, devotion, and love behind me. When I first reached out to Loki, I was 17 years old and absolutely traumatized. Mental illness had ravaged me from a young age but I had finally got ahold of myself and my sanity. However, I then had to deal with all the sorrow of having gone through so much, so quickly. My heart was broken, I was angry, I felt like I had died - and for the first time in my life I was acting out. I was always a "good kid" so I decided with one year left to legal adulthood I was going to do all the things I shouldn't. One of those things was investigating Wicca. I was raised Christian and my mom was fairly serious about it. Not the point of being strangling but I was in church twice a week every week for most of my life. I was not supposed to even look sidelong at something like Wicca. I began with the basic premise - you light the candles, you pray to the god and goddess, you draw your little circle, and you read all the trite nonsense Silver Ravenwolf puts out. But little by little, I felt something, some sort of longing, tugging at my heart. I was being called back to something, and somehow, some part of me was answering back without me even knowing fully yet what it was. When I was at my worst, mental illness wise, there were a few things that brought me immense comfort and joy. And one of those things were the Norse Myths. I would carry Kevin Crossley-Holland's translation in my backpack, I had read and annotated it and Lee M. Hollander's Poetic Edda. In my bio for the school play, I, for some reason, thanked Snorri Sturluson -- I'm not sure where I was going with that.

All this is to say, it was really only a matter of time before Loki and I found each other again. I had found so much comfort in Him (and Others -- ) just a few years before. Here I was, at my lowest again, and we collided. I quickly abandoned Wicca. There was a lot wrong with that system, barring the fact that it didn't fit me or Loki. Either He took the whole thing over and I let Him, or I asked and He came through. I don't remember how, I just know that at first things were extremely difficult. Developing clairaudience was painful and it was a hard-won ability, especially with religiously fueled OCD interrupting my every thought and meditation. I remember some nights just staring into nothing, completely still with fear, terror creeping over me, as I honed my discernment. Was it Loki -? Was it OCD? Was it something or someone else? Had he really said that? Did that really happen? Am I making all this up? Am I stupid, crazy, insane, worthless - ? Is the fact that I'm asking all these questions just another symptom? Is all this for nothing -? All I knew was this: anything I had to go through to reach Loki was worth it. My fear, anxiety, mental illness, and self-hatred and shame was what continuously stopped me in my progress, and I was not willing to let it get in the way of my target, my destiny and destination. One thing I knew above all else; even if my worse fears were true, I would still love Loki and I would search for Him through any confusion, in any nightmare. It's hard to say exactly when I knew things were going to be good working with him because the truth is, I didn't. I loved him but I was terrified of him. Religious OCD is one mean son of a bitch, and it was constantly confronting me with every horrifying doubt about Loki. But I just kept going. I had to - I wanted to. And He helped. A lot. More than I can say. More than I deserved sometimes. He gave me a target to reach just by merit of existing - I was inspired to fight my demons because I knew that every time I did, He was there waiting for me. He gave me peace, brought me clarity, but also threw me into situations where I had to confront these things and deal with them. For years I had no rest - I was wrestling with the angel every day. I didn't always know if it was going to be worth it, but goddamn did I want it. Goddamn did I love Loki. To this day I can't say whether or not this is all real - it certainly feels real. I can absolutely track my progress - I'm now 26, living on my own, mental illness barely touching me, in the place I always wanted to live, working in a career I love, and most of all: I'm happy and I'm healing every day. When struggles arrive I know how to tackle them -- and the truth is, I'm eager for the challenge. I want to wrestle with the angel every day. Few things feel better than becoming a better version of myself. Real or not, it's without a doubt fulfilling, inspiring, and challenging. And goddamn do I love Loki. As for other deities, Odinn and I do speak. He's on my periphery but I'm closing in on Him - and vice versa. At one point I reached out to Skadi and I've worked with Tyr. I have a deep love for all Norse gods. Outside of this pantheon, I do worship Aphrodite as well.

[teenwolffan-with-nolife]

The Witch and The Wolf Pt.40

Word Count: 2,134

Characters: Derek Hale, Chris Argent, Rafael McCall, Noah Stilinski, Stiles Stilinski (mentioned), OC Characters (mentioned), Reader

Pairings: Derek Hale x Witch!Reader

Warnings: fluff, angst, cliffhanger

A/N: ....this was my crappy attempt at writing fluff and this came out

Masterlist      Series Masterlist

You sat on your bed nervously, piles of books surrounding you. You missed too many of your college classes to try anymore, making a final decision to drop out. You skipped too many days and classes and hadn’t shown up for nearly three weeks.

You found a lot of time on your hands, deciding to use the day to research about demons and try to find out more about the thing that attacked Isaac last night. You opened your windows, using the sunlight instead of your lights, seeing as all of Beacon Hills lost power. You blamed Stiles, he must’ve done something.

You heard someone knocking on your door, a bit surprised. Everyone seemed to barge in, it was nice to see someone had manners.

“Derek, hey,” you opened the door, smiling nervously.

“Hey,” you moved aside, letting him in.

“So, the power’s still out?” he asked.

“Ten dollars that Stiles did it,” you raised an eyebrow.

He laughed softly, kissing your forehead as the two of you made your way to your bed.

“What are you reading?” he asked, picking up a book.

“Everything I can about demons. And trying to find more about that thing that attacked Isaac last night. All I know is that they were wearing black robes, and had masks,” you ran your fingers through your hair as you sat on the bed.

“Need any help?” he asked.

“Yes… no… I don’t know. Did you know that there are three types of demons?” you opened a book as he leaned his head on your shoulder, standing behind you.

“Humans become demons when they go to hell, they get tortured until they decide to turn off all their feelings and emotions and give in, demons are created, by… well, the devil, and then, in extremely rare cases, a witch dies, comes back, kills twice,” you sighed deeply.

 “Well, I think you need a break,” he wrapped his arms around your waist as he kissed your shoulder softly.

“No, I don’t need a break, I need to figure out how to stop myself from becoming a demon,” you shook your head.

“I’m serious. Did you even go to sleep last night?” he asked you.

You looked down, shaking your head.

“When was the last time you slept?” he asked.

“Either you can leave, or you can help me do some research,” you replied, sitting on your bed.

“Fine. But only if you come out with me tonight,” he said.

“What? No, Derek-” you started, frowning.

“It’s Halloween. I’m taking you out tonight,” he interrupted.

You nodded your head, grabbing another book as you laid back.

---

After researching a copious amount of time, the two of you decided to take a break, not learning much.

You read something about a group of hunters who attempted to cure a demon, reverting it back to its natural self, but it was never officially proven to work, but maybe it was the start of something.

You looked at Derek, while he sat down across from you, holding a book as he bit on the tip of a pen, reading.

Something felt different. For once, you felt like the two of you might actually have a chance to work, thinking back to your many failed attempts. 

He was different, seemingly more laid back than usual, staying calmer. You feel like you’ve changed, the past few months seem like years and years.

“What are you looking at?” you inhaled as Derek looked up at you.

“Nothing,” you shook your head.

“Well, I think it’s time to take a break. Come on, it’s 6:30, let’s go,” he closed the book, reaching for your hand before pulling you up.

You chuckled softly, leaning upwards as you pressed your lips against his.

You heard someone knock at the door, as you groaned, rolling your eyes as you exhaled sharply, holding Derek’s hand.

“It’s Halloween, right,” you shook your head.

You grabbed a bowl of candy, opening the door as you put on a fake smile, giving a few pieces to the kids at your door before waving them off.

“Catch,” Derek threw you your jacket as you frowned.

“Come with me.”

---

“Derek, I swear we're going in circles,” you said, running your fingers through your hair as you followed behind Derek.

“We’re not. Just follow me, okay?” he motioned for you to hurry up as you rolled your eyes.

“Okay, what are we doing here?” you looked around, seeing the top of Beacon Hills Preserve, which gave you a view of the whole city.

“I thought we could both use a break,” he shrugged, wrapping his arms around your waist as he stood behind you.

“This is…” you looked around with a soft smile on your face.

“This is your favorite place in the whole city. I know,” he replied.

You kissed him gently, wrapping your arms around his neck as he held you tightly.

“Come on, let’s just lay here for a bit,” he said softly, leaning his forehead against yours.

“That's your code word for sex, isn't it?” you raised an eyebrow as you smiled softly.

He nodded cheekily as you wrapped your legs around his waist, pressing your lips against him softly.

---

You heard your phone ringing as you groaned softly, opening your eyes. You felt Derek shuffle, turning to face you. 

“Gonna get that?” he asked you.

“It’s probably not that important,” you shook your head, laying your head on Derek’s chest as you exhaled softly.

The two of you laid on the blanket, holding onto each other. You felt a slight breeze, not particularly surprised, seeing as the two of you were outdoors anyway.

You heard your phone ring again as you rolled your eyes.

“Just pick it up,” he said.

“Fine,” you groaned, sitting up as you looked at your phone, seeing a call from an unknown number.

“It’s probably spam,” you sighed.

“That's the second time they called, it’s probably not,” Derek replied.

“Hello?” you answered the phone.

“(Y/N)? This is Agent McCall,” you tensed up as you gave Derek a look.

“Agent McCall, to what do I owe this pleasure,” you said sarcastically.

“Come to the sheriff’s station. Now,” he said.

“Fine, I’m on my way,” you said.

You hung up the phone, turning to Derek. You stood up, running your fingers through your hair as you bit your lip.

“What does he want?” Derek asked.

“I have no idea,” you shook your head.

“Well, then let’s go,” he stood up, holding your hand.

---

“Agent McCall. Where’s Sheriff Stilinski?” you asked, looking around cautiously.

“Didn't you hear? He’s under investigation,” he shrugged.

“What? That's insane. He hasn't done anything wrong,” you spat, clenching your fist.

He motioned to two deputies behind you, as they grabbed you, putting handcuffs on your wrists.

“What the hell?!” you yelled, pulling away from them.

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N), you’re under arrest,” he said.

“I haven't done anything!” you yelled.

“We found a body in the woods…”

---

He doesn't have any proof

You tried to convince yourself. It was you. You knew it was you. You killed your dad, and now you had to suffer the consequences.

You sat alone in the interrogation room, looking up at the two-way mirror. They were all watching you, you knew it. 

You heard the door open as you continued looking down, feeling your eyes water slightly.

“You don't look too broken up, finding out your father is dead,” Agent McCall took a seat in front of you.

“We never got along to begin with,” you shook your head.

“When was the last time you spoke to your father,” he asked.

“A few months ago,” you said.

“And what happened?” he asked.

“He came to my apartment. He followed me, and he tried to apologize for…” your voice drifted off as you took a deep breath.

“For what?” he asked.

“For abandoning me and my mom. T-This is ridiculous. You don’t have any proof or anything, you just want me behind bars,” you scoffed, crossing your arms.

“Your dad was found in Beacon Hills, 500 miles away from his home and his family,” you felt your heart stop, feeling yourself burning as you shook your head.

“W-What are you talking about?” you clenched your jaw.

“His wife, his kids. His home and his family,” he said.

You bit your lip, holding in your cries.

“Why did you kill him? Were you jealous? Were you mad? Did you want him to suffer?” Agent McCall began to bombard you with questions as you continued looking down, holding in your cries as your vision blurred from your tears.

“That’s enough,” you looked up to see Noah standing at the doorway.

“Stilinski, you can't be here-” Agent McCall started, standing up as Noah interrupted him.

“Actually, I’m still the sheriff. So yes, I can be here. (Y/N) is innocent. He was killed by Jeniffer Blake, who was responsible for 8 other murders in Beacon Hills. She died. (Y/N) is innocent, and she’s free to go,” Sheriff Stilinski walked to you as Rafael stayed quiet, before handing the keys to your handcuffs to Sheriff Stilinski.

“Come on, kiddo. Let’s get you out of here,” he undid your cuffs, holding your arm as he led out of the station, as you kept your head down.

---

“Chris? Chris,” you knocked on Argent’s door frantically, holding in your cries.

“(Y/N)? What happened? What's going on?” he immediately asked, opening the door as he frowned, looking at you cautiously.

You ran to him, burying yourself in his arms as you held onto him tightly, crying softly as your tears streamed down your face.

“A-Are you hurt?” he said frantically, scanning your body for injuries.

You shook your head, holding in your cries as you bit your lip.

“I should've… I-I should've told you before,” you began, taking deep breaths as he walked you to his office, sitting you down next to him.

“I…”

---

“He had a second family?” Chris questioned.

You nodded softly as you continued to slow your breathing.

“He had kids, he got remarried,” you sniffled, burying your head into your lap.

Chris pulled you slightly, leaning you onto him as he caressed your arm softly, calming you down.

“He got what he wanted. Perfect family, a kid who isn't a freak,” you closed your eyes as you felt a tear stream down your cheek.

“You’re not a freak, kid. You have to stop talking about yourself in such a demeaning way. You’re amazing, you’re smart, you’re not a freak,” Chris said, frowning softly.

You sat there quietly before speaking again.

“Do you think my parents would’ve been happy with each other if I wasn't born?” you whispered softly.

“(Y/N),” he started.

“They’re both dead because of me. They would’ve been happy with each other if it wasn't for me,” you held back more tears as you continued holding onto Chris.

“One of the main reasons they fought was because my dad didn't want a home life and he didn't want to be tied down,” you sniffled.

“That’s not true. Your parents had a long list of problems, dating back to long before you were even an idea. You cannot possibly put their problems on you,” he was interrupted by his phone ringing, getting a call.

He tensed slightly, looking at it.

“What is it?” you asked.

“Nothing, look. I have to head out for some time, just stay here, okay? We’re finishing this conversation when I get back. Don’t leave,” he jumped up, grabbing his jacket, and a gun.

“What… do you need backup?” you asked.

“No, I’ll see you in a bit,” before you could say anything else, he was out the door.

---

You paced around the house nervously, biting your nail as you checked the time once more. You could see the sun rising faintly, and you Chris still hadn't come back. You didn't even see Allison, which was unusual.

You had forgotten about telling Derek that you were at Chris’ house, having left your phone at the sheriff’s station. You just wanted to get out of there, not caring about what you left behind.

You heard the front door open as you looked up, walking towards it cautiously.

“Chris,” you started.

He pushed the door open, leaning against the doorway as he dropped his gun to the floor, bleeding from his side as you tensed up. 

You immediately ran to him, pressing down on his wound as he struggled to breathe, trying to speak to you.

“W-What happened?” you said, holding him as you put his arm around your shoulder.

Before he could reply, you felt his body go limp, falling over to the side as you sat down, holding him up in your arms.

“Chris? Chris?”

[felswritingfire]

First Parent up is Horkeu Kamui! I hope these satiates those who requested for him for a bit, I’m still getting a feel for his character! 

Under the cut for length!

Word Count: 2429 

Horkeu Kamui

IF YOU WANTED TO HAVE/RAISE BABIES, HE’D BE SO HONORED ABOUT IT

He’d probs go off into a spiel about it and you’d have to sit through this hour long talk of him shooting off about how humbled he is that “you’ve chosen this Horkeu Kamui to sire your children, my Hero- it is the highest honor-”

He’d probs end up with with three little babies, all of them boys, the oldest is two years older than the twins and all of them are extremely overprotective of you when they get older

He’s ecstatic when you bring home your first boy. He’s always been enamored with the thought of a family and now here’s the start of one with his beloved hero. He’s honestly euphoric about it 

You’d think that he'd be an amazing dad with zero problems since he’s had a history of raising heroes- but, here’s the thing, he has zero clue how babies work because when he gets the heroes, they’re usually all older then, you know, little kiddos. So when you hand him your guys’ first boy for the first time, he just, let’s him lay in his arms too afraid to move because what if he drops him????

You have to lead him by the hand for a bit, which he’s a little embarrassed about, real talk, until he gets the hang of it- which he does, he gets it real quick

He’ll try his best with diapers, but,,, my guy- the dude has a sniffer, what, 100xs better than ours??? So like, he’s coming out of that shit (haha) with tears in his eyes and a migraine. So I suggest you doing it just to spare him and then just comfort him afterward, because a Kamui who’s in pain is… well, painful to see

He does everything else tho!

He loves dressing your babies up in general! He gets these really cute baby clothes that Bathym designed just for your babies, even tho your first boy would always give him grief about wearing clothes- which killed Kamui because he hates doing stuff that makes your babies uncomfy (he’s really soft for them- like extremely soft for them) 

Your twins tho, love wearing the clothes and he actively sends pictures of them to Bathym who literally flips his lid everytime 

Your older one will try to pull said clothes off of them any chance he gets though, in his two year old words: “Trapped!”

Kamui is distressed and you laugh at his distress, which just distresses him even more because:

“My Hero, are you taking a video of this?” “Yes” You say as you continue to hold up your phone, a bright smile on your face. 

He’s struggling with pulling your biggest boy off of your youngest son who’s fighting to keep his shirt on.

With your guys’ babies, they slept in their crib until they started figuring out how to crawl out of it (especially when they all respectively start walking) to get to you guys; you thought that this was just going to be a trend with your first born- but no, he started breaking out the twins and you two almost shit when you both woke up when you felt shifting on the end of the bed that ended up crawling up until your guys’ chest, Kamui tensing, and then you two open your guys’ eyes and there’s three sets of sparkling eyes staring down at you. Suffice to say, Kamui almost launched your boys into the ceiling until he realised who they were. Which they were giggling all the while, your oldest holding the other two up by their waists, until your youngest yawned and flopped down in between you two. And then your middle boy went right after and then your oldest boy rolled your middle out of the way and squashed him up to your youngest, proceeding to curl up against Kamui’s side and knocked out

You and Kamui looked at each other until you shrugged and grabbed the blanket at the end of your bed and pulled it over the boys before you snuggled deeper into the blankets. Kamui promptly followed your lead

When they turn to toddlers, Kamui starts to teach them all how to fight since he wants his boys to be able to protect themselves (and you)

Your first born is, of course, two years ahead of them in his training compared to the twins so he takes it upon himself to help them when they need it so that their papa doesn’t have to worry about them too much, which Kamui is so proud of him for

When he he first took them to the Berserkers colosseum- they uprooted EVERYTHING because all of the gladiators went bat shit crazy when they met the babies; nobody went to do any of the fights, they were all derailed because everyone wanted to say hi to the boys

Kamui was a little worried about his oldest because he almost bit Claude’s hand when he tried to touch his youngest brother, but Claude just laughed it off and started into a spiel about how he would make a great gladiator for the Berserkers one day!

It all changed when he noticed Snow and he screamed and rushed to hug his leg. Snow was shocked and Kamui was trying to pry him off his leg all while saying “Apologies, I should have warned you all, he loves lions and other such big cats.” 

Snow was so flattered that day

The boys are enamored with Pollux and they cheer every time he’d show off his punches, your middle thinks he’s one of the coolest things ever and wants to learn how to punch like him 

Bathym already knows the boys but he’s still so excited to see them and he shows off his moves too, which the oldest tries to copy but he refuses to let go of Snow’s pant leg so he ends up slipping and almost falling but there’s, like, four different sets of hands shooting to keep him from falling; but your youngest is hoping around and toddling towards Bathym and Bathym is MELTING. He ends up holding him the entire time that Kamui is there with them 

They meet Nomad and Macan and your oldest is determined to hold onto all of the cat therians; Nomad complains as he lets him hold onto his pant leg too- Macan he has to be convinced a bit more. “Hah? You wanna get eaten, kid?” 

“Not if I eat you first!”

Kamui almost shit until Macan laughed and wrapped his tail around his arm (which left him sparkly eyed) and said: “you can’t even if you tried.”

Your middle boy noticed this and decided to grab onto papa’s tail and Kamui almost died

All three end up meeting Garmr and they are IN LOVE with him and Garmr gets all the pets and love he could ever want 

They’re all sad to leave and the Berserkers force Kamui to make a promise to bring the three babies back

Kamui is happy too because now he has like, 20 different babysitters. Score.

When they hit the tween years, your oldest is very boisterous and energetic, he bounces off the walls and you have no idea which one of you he got that from. Your other two are very calm, though your youngest is the shyest out of your boys

Your oldest boy is very popular and definitely joins a sports club, something like football, but he definitely goes into wrestling if they have that  (he practices with Uncle ‘Suke who makes him a mask for him, but instead it’s wolf themed). He’s protective of his brothers and the people he cares for, so he doesn’t put up with any bullying on his watch. He will square up if he has too, but it usually doesn’t have to come to that because he’s pretty chill by the end of it 

The oldest comes to Kamui when he needs help with emotional problems, which, might not be the best, but it also is an added oof for Kamui because your oldest has zero filter so when he asks why you have to pee into a girl to have a baby, Kamui almost DIES

  Your middle flits between you and Kamui, luckily he is not one to just hit you with any off the wall questions, so it’s all nice and relaxed when you answer his questions

The little one goes to you with any of his problems. Which can go either way because he’s very similar to Kamui with his social skills, so you’re sometimes sitting there blinking at him trying to figure out how to answer a question 

The boys at this point are becoming more and more protective of you and they are determined to keep you safe and happy. Like, any person even thinks about flirting with you- they’re getting three tweens in their face and it’s terrible because they could all snap a man’s back over their knee and they’re only, what? 13 and 11 respectively (they are huge baby bois, adopted or not) 

Your twins are both much calmer than their older brother, they’re also much closer to their dad’s disposition too, so they tend to be closer to wall flowers- or at least they try; their big brother drags them into the spotlight a lot because he talks about them ALL THE TIME- so they have to put up with their brother’s rambunctiousness a lot

All three of them have a tendency to get in trouble together, your oldest usually runs head first into things while the other two are trying their hardest to get him to not do what he wants to do

There was this one time you and Kamui had to go and get them at three in the morning because your oldest dragged the boys into, what they thought was an abandoned fake haunted house, and your youngest twin called you in near tears as he quickly screeched that: “THE HOUSE IS ACTUALLY HAUNTED- THE HOUSE IS ACTUALLY HAUNTED- MOM/DAD/NANO- COME AND GET US-” And then the message cut out at the sound of your oldest son screaming bloody murder and your oldest twin… also distantly screaming: “DAD. COME AND GET US-” You also heard some… growling??? And more screaming????? You think???? Anyway- you almost shit, and since you were in the living room at the time and Kamui was in your guys’ little home gym you both ended up almost running into each other trying to get out of the house and into the fucking car- 

So, you two get there, ready to murder someone- when you see all three of your boys sitting in front of said “haunted house” just to see Benten of all people yelling at them with Ebisu holding his face in his hands; turns out Benten also thought that the house is haunted and decided to go in their for a video, she also dragged the poor man into it too, and they ended up bumping into a dresser and knocking it over, which set off the boys which caused your son to start swinging, which kicked up a whole bunch of dust, almost got Ebisu punched in the face, and caused Benten to start swinging as well-

Long story short, they were very grounded after that 😔😔😔

By the time they get into high school, your oldest is still loud and boisterous but he’s already on the verge of getting a scholarship for his football and Wrestling and the twins have really committed to their passion: which is MUSIC!

Your oldest twin is in band and plays the French Horn, but he also plays the violin and Bass (Kamui really likes the bass so he learned how to play it just for him ); while your youngest is in choir! Him and his brother get together and do a mini concert just for you two and their older brother- who cried whenever they first played, he was so proud

Their older brother still brags about his little family- it’s actually gotten worse

All of his friends know almost everything about you guys, it’s kinda freaky tbh

Also, you will never forgive Kamui for instilling the instinct to protect you with their lives because they really take their job seriously 

There was this one time where your oldest brought one of his friends over and, aw, poor boy had a big ol’ crush and you and almost got chucked through a window when he tried to be smooth with you by three different giant boys

Kamui just sat with a serene smile on his face as he flipped some pancakes- he’s such a little shit, you swear-

Your boys still like to be near your guys despite being older- like they prefer sticking to you guys than going with their friends

UM, YOUR BOYS TRAIN- despite the boys not focusing on a fighting career or anything of the sort, they still like to be able to stand on par with their big brother so they can help him train- WITH THE RANKERS AND CLAUDE HAD TO REALLY SELL YOU TWO ON IT TO LET HIM TRAIN WITH MACAN BECAUSE, BRO, IF MACAN HURT YOUR BOYS HE WAS GONNA BE TURNED INTO A TIGER RUG BY THE BOTH OF YOu

But he’s actually a really good teacher??? Which shook the fuck out of both of you (and Nomad) 

Speaking of that, your oldest likes training with him, Snow and Nomad the most, while your oldest twin likes training with Pollux and your youngest likes learning from Bathym the most and has some scary ass kicks now 

When your boys do graduate, all of the Berserkers are there to see it and Kamui is so proud of them- he’s not one to cry but he will have this super proud smile on his face and he’ll bring his boys into his arms and squeeze them real tight- your oldest is full on sobbing because he doesn’t want to leave you guys for college; the twins are also sobbing because they don’t want to leave, but they end up going to the same college as their older brother (who is excited AS FUCK ABOUT IT) 

Another really good dad, I think he’d be really fulfilled by the end of it all- he loves his boys to death and he’s so happy you chose to have a family with him- he’s just- ah- so good

[ressyfaerie]

Last suggestion! (I've only saw the dub & not read the manga so pls forgive if I'm wrong with this and they all know) Random headcanon that somehow Kai is the last to know about Tyson's mom passing. Idk but I feel like Kai makes a tasteless comment and the team are like dude we know this? And he's just generally ??? what? He misunderstands and thinks it's recent and speaks to Tyson but he tells him it's been years and years and he's at peace with it. Bonus if awkward hug/attempt at one from Kai 😂 (I also headcanon he's never had a hug so has no idea how to)

AWWW this sounds so cute im doin it. Oh alcohol mentions! It wrote itself but its v cute im proud of this one for sure!!!

Just teenagers being teenagers.

A night in the dojo without adult supervision and nothing to do meant stealing alcohol from the liquor cabinet and singing karaoke.

Ray and Max’s harmonies shattered eardrums.

Tyson laughed, “how can they be high and low pitched at the same time?”

Acting silly and opening up was what tonight was all about.

Even Kai got talkative after a few drinks, you could even say he was acting—

“Irresponsible! Kai get down from there!” Tyson held his sides laughing so hard he thought his lungs would collapse.

Kai hung off the edge of the couch, lounging like a rich prince.

Max hopped up beside him, “what are you doing buddy?”

“I’m a cat.”

The room fell into an uproar of laughs and giggles. Kai fell to the cushions laughing as well.

Tyson took every opportunity to jab questions into Kai.

“Favourite animal?”

“Cats.”

“Favourite food?”

“That ramen you made for us that one time.”

“Favourite dance?”

“Never done it, but I’m a fan of swing.”

“Favourite childhood toy?”

Now he got hung up on that one.

They both laid on the floor, everyone slowly joined. Music from karaoke turned on low escaped the TV surrounding the room in a comforting atmosphere.

“I never really had one.”

“Everyone had one!”

“My parents gave me a stuffed tiger.” Ray grinned while holding a pillow close to his chest, “I lost it though. Man, I loved that thing.”

Max started to talk, then stopped giggling, “I had a piece of silk.”

They laughed, Tyson was the first to respond, “a piece of silk?”

“I called it silky. I was from one of my mom’s old skirts. I would sleep with it every night when she was gone.” He chuckled, “I actually still have it.”

“Where is it?” Ray asked.

“At my dads. I keep it on my nightstand.”

Hilary was sleeping on the couch with her head on Kenny’s lap, Kenny joined the conversation with a hushed voice. “Was it hard? Having a mom that was only half there all the time?”

“Yeah. I always told myself… At least I have a mom. There’s lots of people who aren’t as lucky as me.”

“Yeah…” Kenny trailed off, knowing he had two parents that loved him, and he probably wasn’t welcome in the conversation about to ensue.

“Your Dad’s nice though.” Ray pointed out.

“I love my Dad. My Mom can be a handful…”

“Other way around for me.” Tyson had his arms folded behind his head, “at least you don’t have any crazy siblings.”

“Dude, fuck Hiro.” Kai hiccuped.

“Guess we learned Kai has a low alcohol tolerance.” Max threw a pillow at Kai to catch him off guard.

He caught it in midair.

“Ooohhhh!!” Tyson cooed in awe.

Kai grumbled,” I’m fine. I just hate that guy.”

“Well I never knew my parents thanks for asking.” Ray changed the subject delicately, Kai had a habit of getting aggressive when he talked about Hiro, he didn’t want the conversation to turn sour.

“Why not?” Tyson asked with a drunken lack of compassion.

Ray shrugged, “ it takes a village to raise a child, I guess that’s what happened.”

“Makes sense.” Tyson sat up lazily, “wanna know what my favourite toy was?”

“Hell yeah!” Max somehow had another pillow and was throwing it in the air and catching it over and over again.

“Other than Dragoon, it was this old kendo sword my mom gave me. It was an heirloom. I still have it, but I played with it so much I wore it out, I’m afraid to use it again.”

Surprisingly, it was Kai who responded.

“Wow, your Mom must have put a lot of trust in her kid to give them something like that. She must have loved you a lot.”

The room grew quiet and cold.

Kai turned to look at Tyson, who was just staring back with a blank expression.

“I’m going to go get some water.” Tyson sat up making his way to the kitchen.

As soon as they heard the door slide shut, Max shoved a fist into Kai’s chest.

“Ow! What the hell was that for?!”

“Idiot! Tyson’s Mom died when he was just born! He never even met her! He never talks about it because it's a bit of a touchy subject!”

Max frowned and glared at Kai.

“Sorry.” Kai started, “I never really clued in. I thought she died when he was older.”

Ray slapped a hand to his forehead, “dude, we know this.”

Kai sighed, “I’ll go apologize.”

“Yeah you better!” Max threw the pillow at him, this time Kai let it hit him, accepting his punishment weakly.

“Tyson?”

The kitchen was dimly lit, Tyson was making something at the counter.

“You want some tea Kai?”

“What kind?”

“Just green tea. Nothing special.”

Kai watched him pour the water, unsure how to start, he could still feel the effects of alcohol bouncing around his brain. He waited a moment, hoping to articulate his thoughts appropriately.

“I’m sorry—”

“It’s okay, Kai. It’s been a long time, almost two decades, I mean—you’d think I’d be over it?”

Kai saw his eyes, slightly damp with tears.

“This is a tough subject for you. I’m sorry.”

Tyson rubbed his eyes with his sleeve, letting out a sniffle.

“I’ve always been okay with it. I guess… I’ve never known anything different. I do wish my father and brother were more present though.”

Tyson stared out the window into the darkness of night. He couldn’t see anything, but he still looked, for a long while.

Kai licked his lips before continuing, “I never knew my parents well either. They abandoned me, I have some memories of them, but not much.”

Tyson gave him his attention, and tried to change the subject, “so you would have had a favourite toy then?”

Kai suppressed a laugh, knowing what he was trying to do,” like I said, my memories of that time are fuzzy. I actually remember more of the abbey—surprisingly enough.”

“Oh.” Now Tyson was worried he had overstepped.

“Do you remember what your Mom looked like?” Kai wasn’t sure why he was pressing the subject, he normally wouldn’t.

Tyson blinked a few times, surprised by Kai’s sudden curiosity. “Um, apparently I have her hair, and her eyes. Her face was soft too, so I guess I got all my Mom’s features.”

Tyson rubbed the back of his head grinning.

Kai agreed, “thank god.”

Tyson let out a fast laugh, “ha! Did you just call my Dad ugly?”

Kai squinted his eyes, “I guess I did?”

They fell into probably the hundredth laugh attack of that night, Tyson placed his hand on Kai’s shoulder stabilizing himself.

Their laughs drifted away, Kai glanced at Tyson’s hand, then at his best friend.

“I’m sorry you never knew your mother.”

Tyson was caught off guard at Kai’s soft voice.

“I’m sorry you never really knew yours…” Tyson returned the sympathy.

Kai grinned, and bit his lip, “I’m sorry your Dad’s so ugly.”

“Ha!”

The uncontrollable giggles had Tyson holding his side, and Kai hunched over. They were so close to each other now. Tyson’s hand had drifted to Kai’s neck, he could feel his warm skin and heartbeat. Kai had gone completely against his character, and was holding Tyson’s stomach trying to prevent him from keeling over.

Then Tyson fell forward, letting his chin prop on Kai’s shoulder.

Kai was halfway to hugging him.

When he realized this, he stopped giggling, and Tyson’s irregular breathing was the only remnant of laughter left in the room.

Kai’s voice barely reached Tyson’s ear, “I’ve never hugged anyone before.”

“First.” Tyson wrapped his arms around Kai’s shoulders.

Kai held his arms out loosely, “what are you, a youtube comment?”

Short laughs, Kai felt Tyson’s chest rumble with each chuckle, he let his hands fall into Tyson’s body.

He had his arms wrapped around Tyson’ abdomen, then curled them along his back, completely unsure if what he was doing was right.

Tyson’s voice reverberated through Kai’s ears, “I can hear your heartbeat.”

“What does it sound like?”

“Fast.”

They didn’t say anything.

Kai felt Tyson’s long hair against his cheek, he had never felt such soft hair, let alone so close… He breathed in.

“You smell like cedarwood and cherry blossom.”

“It’s my shampoo.”

Neither one of them had the confidence to break apart, or maybe... they didn’t want to.

Kai found his hand gliding up Tyson's spine, he felt Tyson shiver slightly at the touch. He gently played with the ends of Tyson’s blue hair, feeling it twirl through his fingers like silk.

“Are you… are you playing with my hair?” Tyson’s voice rang in disbelief.

Kai’s eyes grew wide when he noticed what he was doing. He pushed himself away, keeping one hand on Tyson’s side, he didn’t want to let go completely, out of fear he could never go back.

Tyson was in a mirror position with one hand on his shoulder.

“I won’t tell anyone.” Tyson smirked.

“You better not.”

“You can play with my hair whenever you want.”

“Can I!?” Kai took a step back after he realized how excited his voice was.

“Learn how to tie a braid and then we can talk.” Tyson pushed the envelope with his teasing.

“I’ll google it right now.”

[fluorescencefuture]

Homestuck^2: How I’d write the Omega Kids (and the Candy timeline villains)

I haven't reread Homestuck nor the epilogues in a while so correct me if I'm wrong with anything here. This was all in one go, too, so I probably missed something here or there. I'm also not a native English speaker so pardon some grammar errors.

In General

I’d give them a five-letter name scheme. Names of a group being the same length was a big deal in original HS (human first names had four letters, troll names had six, Ancestors had eight-letter titles, Cherubs had eight letters too, etc.), so it’s odd seeing this new group have names of varying length

I’d also give them all shirt symbols. It’s odd that something so iconic to Homestuck isn’t present in the new kids, either.

I'll write for both the canon post-canon with evil Jane and for my own version with different villains. Evil Jane happens because a highblood troll who hears of the old ways of Alternia attempts to kill her and take her crown, as she's technically the heiress. Jane wins, but she starts to see trolls and Alternian culture in a different light from then on. At first she was only trying to prevent the worst parts of Alternian culture from coming back, but over time grew to despise trolls, and ended up trying to force human culture onto Alternians.

The other Candy villains are a dangerous terrorist rebel group that wants to overthrow the creators and destroy them. They say the creators made the people, abandoned the people for years, then suddenly came back and decided they control the people. The group is made of humans, trolls, carapacians, and even consorts. The mysterious shadowed leader claims to be doing this for the people, but really, all they want is to have control for themselves, and they don't care if any innocents get in the way.

Harry Anderson

Has nothing to fix, he’s perfect as is

Okay but seriously, the guy is the kid with the least questionable things around him. He has no baggage from sharing the same name as an established character (ICP Harry Anderson doesn’t count), and he didn’t come from infidelity.

He also has actual color to his personality. He likes musicals and sewing. He has a good relationship with his dad. Like many kids with divorced parents, he wishes his parents were together again. What do the others have? Vrissy is just a slightly less aggressive Vriska. Tavros is just OG Tavros and Jake combined. Yiffy’s thing is being a dog girl named Yiffany Longstocking. The others could be fleshed out eventually, but with the slow pace and meandering plot we have right now, I doubt it.

If Jane's the villain, things would mostly go the same way. If Jane isn't the villain, it goes two ways: he decides to join Vrissy's guerilla anti-anti-creator group and fight because he wants to protect his parents, or he's just very anti-conflict and avoids the fight because he doesn't think he's up to it. He's frequently threatened but doesn't tell his parents about the threats. Eventually, he gets convinced to join and fight.

Vrissy

So Vrissy’s in relationships with guys who are technically her cousins. At first I was like “well, they’re not biologically related nor were they raised as family so it’s not weird”. But then Tavros called Kanaya “Aunt Kanaya” and now I’m thinking “oh god, that’s really weird”.

Now she’s just a troll girl from school. She's just close to Kanaya and Rose, but isn’t their kid. She isn’t related to anyone. Anyone except Vriska, who she was named after. Vrissy’s new nickname is just Vriss.

Alternatively, her name is something completely different. Honestly, it just seemed like a way to shoehorn in a Vriska for the story. Only for actual Vriska to come back anyway.

Uhh, Eshtha (from Jyeshtha, a Hindu nakshatra Scorpius is associated with)? Oriona (from Orion, the myth where Scorpius is mostly attributed to)? Naiaka (from Manaiakalani, as Hawaiians saw Scorpius as the demigod Maui’s fishhook)? Oh wait, I’ll have to make nicknames for those names too. Uh, Eshty, Riona, and Naiah.

Maybe have her have a personality that’s rather opposite to Vriska’s than have her as Vriska 2. She's more a perky goth, more cheerful and sweet. More "I knew you could do it!" than "So you can do something after all." A beast in battle, of course. She doesn't like to use her mind control powers, because she finds them disturbing.

If Vriska had to come back, the conflict would come from their conflicting personalities. Vriska would pretty much act the same way she did to (Vriska), but this time, Vriss doesn't take any of it and stands her ground.

Whether the villain is Jane or not, she's the one who decides to fight back, and she gets her friends and others to join her. The creators have been nothing but good to her, and she cares about them a lot, especially Rose and Kanaya. Not to mention they're also her friends' parents.

Tavros

Yeah, we’re gonna have to rename that kid. It never made sense to me why Jake and Jane named their kid after some guy they don’t know that well. I don’t remember everything from the Epilogues, but I’ll assume the reason was Gamzee or something. Also weird that Jane, who’s supposed to be racist to trolls, would just...let her kid be named after one.

Something old-ish would work. Flynn? Silas? Avery? Clyde? Niles? Louie?

He's moirails with this Vriss instead of kismeses. The Vrissy/Tavros kismesis also felt like re-hashing the kismesis that Vriska and OG Tavros kinda had.

If we went post-canon villain Jane, he'd be reluctant to join the rebellion and is more of a pacifist who would rather try to talk his mom out of it.

Alternatively, Jane and Jake are separated (but not divorced) and he lives with Jake. Because Jane was never terrible to him and Jake doesn't tell him how bad she's gotten, he disagrees with her but still tries to justify and rationalize that Jane's really doing it from a place of good intentions.

If the villain isn't Jane, then Jane and Jake have been hiding him away, and his friends can only see him when they visit him at his swanky home. You might say he's...housetrapped. He joins because his friends are in it, and doesn't quite grasp how serious things are until the rebels try to kill Jane (the rebels try to kill Jane first because you always kill the healer first).

He's in contact with a mysterious guide who's kinda spacy and a little terrifying at times. His friends think the guide might just be some creepy predator. It's revealed to be Candy Gamzee, out of the fridge and legitimately harmless, but untraceable and doing mysterious things behind the black. Again.

Come to think of it, Dirk's missing too...

Yiffany Longstocking

Yiffy is now the ectokid of Dave and Jade. She looks more like a DaveJade kid than JadeRose, really. Dave and Jade are also either happily married or coming close to an amicable divorce. Yeah, the toxic shit Jade did and the erasure of Dave's bisexuality also don't exist here. Jade, Dave, Karkat, and Terezi are backing Vrissy's anti-anti-creator group.

Her new name is something unisex. Riley? Logan? Robin? Sloan? Salem?

She spends a lot of time outside doing sports and doesn't talk much. She's not very close to the other three kids, but she's surprisingly pretty close to her Aunt Rose.

While Jade and Dave are out on a mission for Karkat (this is the mission Candy Dave dies), she gets kidnapped by the opposing force (Jane/the terrorists). She gets a shock collar forced on her, then is hidden away in a Boarding School for Inconvenient Girls, enrolled under the name "Yiffany Longstocking". Jade comes home to find that her family's been taken from her. Again.

Yiffy almost escapes, but she gets knocked out and taken back to base, where they lock her in a cage and treat her like a dog. She's still defiant to the end.

If Jane's the villain, Jake is inspired by Yiffy's defiance, grows some balls, exposes Yiffy's treatment to the press, and sets her free. She beats up the guards trying to stop her. Jake gets surrounded by more guards. In response, he pulls out his pistols and a one-liner, and bam, cliffhanger.

If it's the terrorist group, Terezi picks up on Yiffy's scent when they're in a base, and she's saved by the other three kids, where she immediately turns around and beats the crap out of the guards. They become proper friends from there.

The reunion panel still happens and this time it's her reuniting with her loving mother and aunt instead of...y'know.

BONUS: Sadstuck

Harry gets his own “im not a hero” speech after trying and “failing” to be the hero that John was

Vriss is eventually forced to use her mind control powers. It’s either a “Katara using bloodbending" situation, or she forces her friends to leave her behind when they want to stick by her.

Tavros finally witnesses his mother’s true nature when Jake defeats all the guards, but is stabbed from behind by Jane and killed. In the other version, it seems Jane is finally safe and able to come home to her son. Then she’s killed right in front of him.

After the big hug with Jade and Rose, Yiffy pulls away. She smiles, looks around behind them, and asks “Where’s Dad?”

So, please tell me what you think!

[goldeneyedgirl]

Jaliceweek20 Day 1

Against a Wall Part 2

Jaliceweek20 Day 1: Human/Vampire

Words: 6264

Notes: It is DONE. JALICEWEEK IS DONE. I am tired, so I’ll do a wrap up tomorrow. I’m honestly not sure how happy I am with this ending - I’ll write more notes tomorrow once sleep had been acquired but there still might be a third enormous rewrite.

I’m just so excited I finished EVERY SINGLE PROMPT.

Warnings for: suicidal ideation.

—

Nineteen.

There was a shoebox under his bed with a bunch of stuff in it, that he’s collected over his life. Stuff that was special - Sorates’ collar, a rock shaped like a dog, the rubber spider his grandfather bought him from the dime store. And the last thing he put in it was an unopened back of Skittles.

He wonders where that box is now.

—

Things are hard to remember. The doctors say his memory should return, with time, and everything will stop feeling like someone scooped them all out of his brain and threw them up in the air like confetti.

He remembers… Ava. No, not Ava. Yes, Ava, his sister.

She did something.

Ava lit the fuse that had been dangling over the family for six years. Wasn’t Ava’s fault. Never blamed her. He hurt for her.

Louise found the bit of paper and freaked out, yes. It was Ava’s paper. Evidence. And Louise was shrieking. And Jerry heard.

Everybody heard. He remembers making Flo and Hettie stay in the kitchen, hide under the table if you need to (the screen door is banging, Lydia is gone like a puff of air at the first sign of trouble; wish she’d taken Flo and Hettie this time). Hettie had already been sniffling, and he’d left the kitchen.

Bang.

He’d gotten between Ava and their father.

He would have killed them both; that look in his eye. There wasn’t love or affection in that gaze. There wasn’t recognition of his children. There was just rage. That’s a look he wished he could forget; of all the things lost in the confetti, he wants to know why that moment that Jerry looked at him and Ava (Ava was bleeding, can’t remember why) is still there?

Then it’s a blur. Then there’s nothing.

Then he joins the military. He walks away entirely, with only what he can carry and doesn’t leave any parting words because there’s nothing to be said.

No. Something happens before that.

Ava packed her car, yes, packed in Hettie and Flo, suitcases and boxes, and at the last minute Lydia materialises into the passenger seat, whilst their mother tries to … beg? Yell? Ava’s face is black and blue and bandaged, and there was someone he knew who could fix that, with Mary Poppins’ bag…

Then Ava drives off, and their mom is crying, and he walks straight to the nearest recruitment office even though he doesn’t graduate for another three months because once the bomb has gone off, there’s no taking it back.

—

What was the bomb again?

Bomb. Which bomb?

Ava’s, not the one that… not the other one.

Paperwork from Planned Parenthood. There was a baby, but Ava’s already raising her sisters, so she sucked it up, stole $500 from their father’s study, and took care of it. She’d thrown the money back in their father’s face, money she got from her own account, and their father had punched her so hard he broke her nose and her orbital bone, and then it gets blurry again.

His body stings and aches and itches. He recites all the swears he knows in his head, and a few he doesn’t, and he wishes everything would put itself right again.

Bang.

—

The other bomb. That’s why he’s here, in the VA hospital. The one that was strapped to a little boy who ran up to one of the guys in his unit, grinning and clutching a soccer ball to hide the shape obscuring his torso.

Bang.

Bombs don’t sound like ‘bang’ either. They are a vacuum of noise and pain and detritus and fire and he now knows the sound-taste-smell of roasted human fresh.  They are wiping out all but two members of a unit and a little boy who didn’t have a choice or an idea of what he was getting into.

The images are burnt onto his brain forever; when he closes his eyes, all he sees is a face roast black and splitting open to reveal the ruby red of the blood and muscle underneath, leaking clear and yellow fluid.

Empty, black eye sockets staring, just sticky blackened holes.

Bodies arched and twisted in pain, looking like blacked trees and burnt bark until you remember where you are and what you’re looking at and some of that burnt bark flesh is your own.

He wishes those memories would disappear.

Less than a year in the army, and already medically discharged. So much for an escape plan. Has to be a record, shortest army career in Whitlock family history. Shorter even than Uncle Wyatt’s, but Wyatt was smart enough to die outright, so it’s just a damn tragedy instead of a humiliation. He knows how the game is played.

Fuckin’ Whitlock curse comes for all of them eventually.

The skin graft hurts like hell, and the medication is still scrambling him, and even when the doctors have pulled out every last stitch, he still looks like some kind of monster pieced together from leftovers. There are still scars, dozens of scars. He asks when they’ll go, but the doctors just brush over his question - plastic surgery is the most solid of answers, but nobody wants to commit to an answer, so he guess he has it. This is how he looks now.

They fill his pockets with pills and send him on his way with their gratitude for his service, as if he has somewhere to be, someone to go to. He’s got nearly ten months of army pay just sitting there - minus a chunk that confuses him until he remembers he’s been sending money to Ava, a neat row of transactions he’s simply labelled ‘miss you’.

Should’ve sent her more.

He stays in Houston, doesn’t bother going home. There’s nothing there for him - his sisters are gone; Ava’s in Austin for college with the girls. Ava, who is somehow juggling three sisters, a college degree, probably a part-time job, and all her own pain.

Maybe he should go to Ava. But the idea of dragging himself all the way to Austin, to sleep on a couch or something, and have his sisters see this ruined version of him makes him want to hide.

The idea of his shaking hands, and the crisscross of scars, and limp being seen by sweet Hettie, dear Flo, sharp Lydia, and tired Ava; knowing they’ll hear his uneven pacing, his wild panic, his endless nightmares makes him stay away - he can’t even pick up the phone. He failed them so many times, and he can’t expect them to put him back together now. Ava’s got nothing left for herself, the others are too young; Lydia’d be graduating this year, she doesn’t need a fuckin’ ghoul of a brother hovering in the background after everything she went through. Better they remember him as he was, as the name on a receipt, that whatever he is now.

His mother is probably still there; working too many hours at the VA hospital and burning toast and being tired. She wrote to him once or twice after he left, and he hated how those letters made him feel. They were all messy apologies and excuses and blame and misery framed in the day-to-day monotony of her life. He felt her hollowness at being left, the mother of five with no children in her home. She should have been helping Lydia pick a prom dress, arranging her graduation party and college tours; driving up to visit Ava at college; sending him inedible cookies; dropping Flo off on her first date, and spoiling baby Hettie even though she’s almost in middle school. But she couldn’t. Because they’d all walked away.

He didn’t write back. He was too angry then, and now he’s … nothing. She feels like a ghost to him, like she died the first day Jerry hit him, and she slowly faded away every Tuesday after that.

And Ava’s the only name on his paperwork, for next of kin and power of attorney shit; and that’s only so she could have his money when he was gone.

His father’s still in Sheldon, he has no doubt of that. He hopes Jerry dies in that empty old house, abandoned by everyone he should have loved better, cared for better and surrounded only by the bottles that he let salt the earth and poison his family.

His uncles are still there, as reliable as the rising and setting of the sun, most likely ready and waiting to jeer at Jasper for his wasted attempt as a soldier, for his patchwork of skin and scars, for his limp and his confetti memory; to fail so fantastically after ten lousy months. No diploma, no future, no plan.

Not even old enough for a fuckin’ drink.

Still a better shot than Bo, though. Sometimes he wants to ask them, though, to look ‘em in the eye and demand to know what they expected from him - the sole Whitlock boy, the heir to a name that meant sweet fuck-all these days - when all they did was punch him when he was down? That letting a kid get beat up, then get insulted and demeaned and mocked and yelled at… that didn’t create a good man, that didn’t create a happy, successful person. They did everything they damn well could to see him gone, failed, erased and that was before he joined the goddamn army. There was no brotherhood in the Whitlock name. Even if he had gotten out unscathed, he would have run til no one knew him, and he wouldn’t have gone home again.

But he didn’t, and here he is having bitter arguments with old men who aren’t even there.

He sits in his motel room, takes his pills with water from the bathroom, and occasionally remembers to find food. He doesn’t sleep well on the hard, musty motel bed; the nightmares come in waves even when his brain is like mush from the medications. A car door slamming, a yell from the street, the smell of cooking meat - it all sends him skittering, panicking, pacing. He can’t stop moving, and his bad knee swells up and finally he gets his hand on some liquor and he ends up slung into the stained bathtub barely able to think. Definitely not able to stand.

He just wants it to stop.

The mostly-empty bottle hits the grimy tiles and smashes, but he thinks of a girl with amber eyes and a magic bag and a watch that she gave him - hurled at him. He remembers sleeping on a cold, bony shoulder in an alley, her voice sweet and warm.

She was so mad with him that last night. He did end up back behind Dewey’s again, on more than one Tuesday, but he didn’t see her again. And it wasn’t long after that when everything went to hell, so he never got to say goodbye. Say sorry for being a dick.

He can’t quite remember what they were arguing about that last night. Whiskey and valium have chased that memory away, and his head slumps over as he sleeps. Or looses consciousness. Either way, he doesn’t have to exist for awhile, and it suits him just fine.

—

Time passes. He finds a cheaper motel, because there’s a corner of his brain that is somehow still functional and practical, and he knows what money he has has to be stretched. Someone from the VA calls his cellphone and he ignores it. He takes his pills - less than usual, because they’re running out.

His knee hurts.

He breaks a lamp and the mirror after a nightmare, and ends up at urgent care getting his knuckles stitched up by some intern who asks him too many questions.  Tries to give him pamphlets, and he resists the urge to punch the doctor in the face.

The doctor does write him new prescriptions though. That’s helpful. And he gets something to eat at the cafeteria. It starts out as a bad night and ends up being one of those mornings he almost feels human, as long as he doesn’t look in the mirror.

That’s why he picks up the phone when the VA call again.

That’s how he finds himself sitting outside the VA hospital with a paper bag of the shit he left behind. His mother’s letters, his dog-tags, and an extremely broken watch.

“Happy freakin’ birthday.”

He looks at it closely now, more closely than he did when he was given it - even if it was thrown at his head, it was a gift in his mind. The brown leather strap is stained and nearly torn through, and the brass buckle bent. The face is cracked in an almost perfect spiral. The face is mottled cream, with neat gold Roman numerals; several have come loose and rattle along the bottom, along with the minute hand. It no works, and he hopes that the internal gears are still functional.

The watch will need to be repaired professionally, to be taken apart and pieced back together. A new glass face and band, the numerals and hands put back in the rightful place.

He doesn’t even remember wearing it, that last day. He knew he had it with him the entire time, through basic training and everything, but he didn’t remember wearing it. He’d had some chunky digital thing that told him the weather and GPS and shit that had been responsible for the mutilation of his left wrist.

Carefully it into his jacket, Jasper stands and begins the walk back to the motel.

Nineteen, still.

Sometimes, he thinks about going back to Dewey’s, just to see if she ever turns up again, on a Tuesday. For some reason, when he thinks of her - Miss Alice, in her funny clothes, and her lilting voice - he thinks of her exactly how he remembers her, that she is fixed in time and will never change. That he could return to that alley a week, a year, a decade from now, and she will still be there with her bag of tricks and big golden eyes.

He thinks about her a lot. He never knew where she came from, how old she was, why she spent Tuesday nights in an alley with him. He hopes she’s safe, comfortable, and happy.

He hopes she still thinks of him.

Time marches on, and he can see his twentieth birthday rushing up to greet him. He’s done nothing to change his circumstances - the cheapest hotel room, a fistful of pills on an empty stomach, patchwork sleep haunted by corpses. The PTSD special.

He finds a bar that respects his service more than his age, and they’re happy to let him drink himself numb in the corner as long as he doesn’t make trouble, and slips out the back if the cops come round. But even when they do, and get a good look at the scars, at his jacket, at the look in his eyes, they usually just nod and move along. No one asks questions, just counts out his crumpled money and then slides his drink along the bar.

Life doesn’t feel worth much on those nights.

Stumbling back to the motel, drunk and dull, he never notices the footsteps. He just goes to his room, his home, and passes out on a stained bedcover fulling clothed, waiting for the nightmares to kick in.

—

When the nightmares press in on him, and he’s lying on the bed staring at the discoloured popcorn ceiling, all he really wants is to go home again.

Not to Sheldon.

To the ranch.

Before Hettie, before Tuesdays, before everything. Where they buried Socrates under the tree with the treehouse, where he learned to ride, and would catch rabbits, and everything was easy. He still got told off by his father for being such a disappointment, but back then, they still had the family property, so his father wasn’t so angry.

He’s stone cold sober - aside from the Vicodin and Valium rattling around in his stomach - when he decides to go home again. He even stops in at a grimy diner and shovels in a plate of eggs and some coffee before he buys the bus ticket.

He knows the old place never sold; bank couldn’t shift it. Sold some of the land, but the old farmhouse just sits there, rotting. The Whitlock curse strikes again and again, into the heart of everything.

It’s a long trip; only way out there by bus is to go via San Antonio, and then down towards the old farm on another rural bus that only runs a few times a day. And he didn’t think much about how to get from the last bus stop to the old house proper, but some old guy in a truck takes a good hard look at him - his stained jacket, his limp, the scars twisting around his limbs and under his clothes, and offers to take him wherever he’s going.

He’s stiff and sore and hungry, but he doesn’t worry about any of that. The driver’s polite, amicable, doesn’t ask too many questions but gives him the number of the only cab in town for his return trip. He nods his thanks, and begins limping up the old driveway, towards home.

The house is… sad. Not like his memories, of blood red geraniums in the window boxes, and a pile of sneakers and boots in a jumble by the front door. There aren’t any bikes leaning up against the porch railings, either. Hell, the porch has a hole in it, the wooden rotten through. The yard is an overgrown tangle - probably concealing a few snakes.

The treehouse has long since collapsed, the wooden remains jutting out from the overgrown grass like a shipwreck. Socrates’ little grave is probably still there, under it all, with the brick he and Lydia painted his name on. He was a good cat.

He’s not going to go into the house, and now that he’s here, he’s not sure why he came at all. It’s just a house he once lived in, like Sheldon. But there is something peaceful about being back here, sitting on the - thankfully brick - front steps and staring out at the road. No cars come by, neighbours are too far away to matter. It’s just him.

He lets his thoughts float. More than once, he’s wished he’d been able to keep his service weapon, finish the job the bomb started. He thought about other ways - swallowing all his pills till there’s nothing left in the bottle; buying some razor blades and cutting along his seams; finding a motel with rafters he can loop a belt around. But he doesn’t. He hasn’t. He doesn’t know why - the thought is like a mischievous cat looming over his shoulder. The cat with a too-big smile, from Hettie’s books. Sinister yet convincing and trustworthy. But the thought lingers, and right now, he wishes he’d come prepared because … it’s quiet here. It’s quiet and he associates it with good things, and he’s really, really tired.

His VA shrink said that disassociation was a common symptom of PTSD. There were methods of dealing with it, techniques he could use, but he didn’t bother remembering them. Sometimes it was nice not to feel things, to be entirely seperate from himself for awhile.

When he comes back to himself, the afternoon has turned to night, and he’s an idiot sitting outside an abandoned farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, in a town with one cab. He swears under his breath, and the two braincells that are still desperately trying to keep him alive blaze into action, as he fumbles for his cellphone.

At least it isn’t dead.

He doesn’t even notice the sound as he dials, but as the phone rings he looks up in confusion, as a woman walks up the drive. She’s small enough for his heart to jump in misguided hope, waiting for that smile, those eyes, and that stupid bag that he placed so much faith in.

Her eyes are red, and her hair is long and brown. Her lips stretch too far like that stupid cat, and she takes the phone from him so gently and crushes it into a find powder. And he wishes he’d stayed drunk and high instead of staying sober and coming back to his childhood home like some kind of fucking book character.

She calls him ‘mi amor’ and apologises for what comes next.

He tries to back away, but stumbles on his bad knee, and when she hurls him back up effortlessly, she dislocates his shoulder and probably breaks his arm, and for a moment his vision swims and he yells, and that is only the very beginning of the pain.

—

In his few lucid moments over the next seventy-two hours, he wonders when he gets to stop suffering. When he finds the end of the tunnel of pain, from Tuesdays behind Dewey’s, to being half-burned alive, to be put back together and drugged senseless to function, to whatever this woman has done to him.

It feels kind of like the bomb did, except like it is taking him slowly. If he could open his eyes, he’d expected himself to be blackened and splitting, like the crust of a volcano.

If he could be sick, he would.

He thinks he screams himself hoarse. He might just think about doing it.

Red eyes watch him the entire time, with the ruby-coloured too-big smile, and if he still believed in god or fate or family curses or anything aside from the slow drip of pain in this veins, he would think she was the devil incarnate.

—

Time passes. He doesn’t know how much, since he woke up in the rotting remains of his family’s home with a burn in his throat, and Maria waiting for him. She’s quick to reassure him of his new status as a god, quick to find him something to quench the burn (the boy is young but strong and bulky; probably a high school football player. Healthy and full of blood and cries for his momma when Jasper half-rips his throat out. She is quick to caress his cheek and to kiss him long and deep and to fuck him in the wreckage of the house.  

Maria’s clan is small - only nine of them counting him. They are suspicious of him, of the way he stares and stays quiet. But Maria is quick to ease any of his own misgivings - newborns are entirely unpredictable, volatile. He is her new pet, her treasure, her mijo.

He loves what he is, truly. He leaves the pill bottles rattling in his pockets in the dirt of the farmhouse floor, and strides confidently after his new mistress. His leg is strong again, and all the scars have melted away into smooth, hard stone. He came to the farm looking for something, and he found it - himself, the way he was always supposed to be. If life had been kinder.

He’s found himself a soldier in another war, but war is a lot easier when you aren’t weighed down with equipment or fear or stupid fucking rules. When winning a battle means glutting yourself on blood, and losing means instant death, and there’s nothing in-between.

They are so fast now, hunting grounds stretch from Monterrey to Corpus Christie to San Antonio.

He refuses to go to Austin but sometimes its hard to remember why. He nearly kills Lucy when she tries to take the others to Austin, and Maria’s lips purse but she says nothing and they go to Laredo instead. They create a few more newborns, but he notices Maria’s attention to him never wavers; they are like pets, whilst he is her devoted prince.

(Later, he’ll find out it was only six god-damned months he lost. That he turned twenty and Lydia graduated somewhere in an Austin high school, and a bunch of people - mostly social workers and VA employees - were looking for him with the fear of the worst. He’d tell them that whatever ‘worse’ was, they weren’t even close.)

They figure out his gift during one furious early battle that leaves his arms and neck littered with bite marks, and they don’t go away. The venom works too fast, the bites are too deep, and he is once again a mess. A monster. His rage ripples around the camp, and everyone huddles in on themselves, and even Maria cowers a little, cooing and trying to settle him.

He makes them afraid, he makes them tremble, he tries to force them into fixing the unfixable.

Maria is so pleased with his gift, he is never punished for his tantrum. And more bite marks layer upon his skin; when he frets over them, with a sneer on his face, she laughs and promises he’ll have many, many more before they are done.

—

Nineteen, always.

Reconnaissance in the back of Houston is required, and Jasper and Maria take a small group with them. Maria is insistent there are others on their lands, and that is a crime of the highest order. They will destroy the newcomers, feed, and return to Monterrey. They each pick a point of Houston, and agree to meet in the centre.

He is ordered to the northeast, and he goes without resistance; he knows soldiering is following orders, and Maria lets his resistance to Austin go unremarked upon.

Most of his human memories are hazy, like they are so very much older than they really are. The streets he stalks are almost familiar, and he keeps his head low - more because of the blazing red of his eyes than any fear of being recognised.

There’s an aged but enticing aroma that he follows, that smells of nice, soft things; not fresh enough to guarantee a confrontation (or execution), but one that is a regular in this part of town.

It’s late enough there are few people in the street, in this working-class part of town. Even the dive bar has gone dark, and only the drunks and shift workers are left stumbling around. It’s not even hard to snag one of the less aware drunks around the wrist and vanish around into the alley with him.

His blood is nothing memorable, and it’s not hard to make the drunk look like he tripped and slashed his neck on a smashed bottle in the alley. He’s good at staging these scenes; at making things look like terrible, despicable accidents.

“Oh, Jasper.”

The words are soft and murmured, and he can’t decide whether they are sad or relieved or something in between. All he knows is that there is a sweet-smelling threat behind him, and he spins around with a snarl.

She’s only as tall as a child, with uneven black hair curling around her cheeks. She’s one of the prettiest girls he has ever seen, with huge amber-coloured eyes that remind him of porcelain dolls. She’s wearing a sky blue sweater a size too big over jeans with stars on the knees, and staring at him with hope and regret.

In the back of his brain, that little bit that is not quite human and not quite animals looks at her hard and breathes in her roses-and-rainwater scent and simply thinks, “Yes. Good.”

But the louder part recognises her as the trail he has been following, the one that Maria wants destroyed. A growl rumbles from within him, and the girl just looks sad.

“I’m so, so sorry Jasper,” she says, still standing there, not the least be defensive. “Carlisle and Edward forced me to stay away once you left, and then I tried to watch you but I lost track of where you were…” Her eyes are shiny, as if she wants to cry. “Do you remember who I am?”

The question hangs in the air between them, his growl fading away as he stares at her.

She steps closer, and he glares at her. The animal brain is getting louder - “Yes-good-yes-good-yes-good.” Her emotions are threatening, mostly sad, and she’s tiny. Nothing bad could be so dainty and pretty.

She’s right in front of him, standing on her toes as she presses her hand to his face. “I’m Alice,” she says simply, and his mind folds itself over and over again in an instant to provide him with an answer to this riddle, to this girl that is so clearly something good and known to him.

And he remembers.

“Are you okay?”

“It’s a stupid fucking decision you’re about to make.”

“At least I didn’t break it worse.”

“Happy freakin’ birthday.”

"They just looked nice. Happy.”

“I’ve come too far to watch you die in this disgusting place,”

“Alice,” he says hoarsely, and his memories of her are clear, sharp. He can remember that one strand of hair that always fell into her face; her ice cold hands roughly patching him up; the constant, lilting companionship of her voice, even when he slept. She is so clear in his mind he wonders how he forgot her in the first place.

Her smile and emotions bloom with joy all at once, and it warms him all the way through. It’s the kind of happiness that eluded him during his human life, and one he has not felt, waking up with this gift that feels like everyone’s emotions are constantly crawling on him. It’s something he wants to wrap himself in like armour.

“I’m so, so sorry,” her fingers brush a scar on his neck so gently, he wants to shudder.

“What for?” he asks, wanting to know if he can touch her. She’s so pretty and clean and is a good thing, a precious thing.

“I see things. Things that are going to happen,” Alice says, as she inspects his arm with a frown. “And when I saw what was going to happen to you in the army, I got mad that I couldn’t protect you anymore. And when you came home, I didn’t realise she was following you until it was too late and I couldn’t work out where you’d ended up. I would have come sooner if I’d known, I swear.” She turns his arm over to reveal a bite mark on his wrist and impulsively kisses it.

He flinches; the contact magnifies her emotions - and his - and it skitters pleasantly along his body.

“I don’t…” he begins, his voice still gravelly from lack of use. “I don’t blame you.”

“I do,” she replies softly, and then she backs away and that is disappointing enough that he takes a step closer to her. She giggles and smiles at him again, and he will follow her anywhere.

“You have to make a choice now,” she says, and he nods hypnotically.

“You can go back to Maria,” her voice wavers again, and he doesn’t like the coldness that sweeps through her at that statement. “And fight and kill until she’s bored with you. She creates war and destruction and monsters, Jasper, and I don’t want you to go with her. She will destroy you, and I couldn’t bear it if…” She stops, turning her head away and stays silent for a moment.

“Or,” her voice is steady again, “you can come with me.”

She holds out her hand.

“My brothers and sisters are distracting Maria and her friends for now, you and I can get away, and go somewhere safe,” she continues. “Just you and me together. I can…”

He never knows what she was going to say because his choice is made, his hand taking hers without a second thought, and she stares up at him with wide eyes, her mouth a perfect ‘o’.

“Are you sure?” she manages, and he nods. He thinks of pain, human and immortal. He thinks of rage and regret. He thinks of his lowest point as a human, of the permanent bite marks on his arms, and the weight that has only shifted now that he’s immortal, not lifted away.

He thinks of being happy and safe and clean and peaceful. He thinks of a girl sitting next to him in an alley, with her throat burning, but her only worry about his bruises.

The girl who can back for him.

Everything is still muddled, from his human life, but he knows that lot of people took him apart and remade him in both his lives. She’s the only one who tried to heal him.

“Let’s go,” he says, and she laughs sweetly, and then they are running faster than anyone can see as they disappear into the night.

—

‘Home’ is a cabin in the middle of the forest, somewhere towards the north east, he thinks. No people around, just wild animals for him to glut himself on. There is the constant running of the river beside them, covering their scent against nomads. It is quiet here - a good place to figure out the edges of his gift, to learn resistance and control, to try and heal and reconcile all that happened to him in such a short space of time.

Alice tells him Maria was indescribably desperate after his disappearance; their exit covered by a well-time rainstorm that washed all the scents away. She had torn apart Houston in her fury, and now she was in more trouble than she knew.

Meaning that Maria wouldn’t come hunting for him any time soon. And, he supposes, when she does, Alice will know. Alice knows everything.

She knows that he likes to sit on their front steps and just stare out at the forest without being disturbed. That the scent of smoke and fire sends him twitching worse than any vampire she’s ever met. That the scars that mark his arms, neck, and face are simply placeholders for the ones he gained as a human, and his disgust over them lingers from the injuries he suffered in war. That he misses his sisters, and they are one of the reasons he is so resolute in his control training. That, if nothing else, he will say good bye and fake his death to give them closure. Alice promises him that she knows someone who can help them figure all those kinds of details out, but she wants him to see his sisters one last time almost as badly.

He knows that Alice loves him, as truly as anyone has loved before. That feeling never wavers, not through his rages, his depressions, his disassociation. That just watching him read a book on their (broken) couch has joy blooming inside her. He knows that Alice will never pressure him, never ask him for more than he is ready to give - and because of that, he is willing to give her anything she asks.

Some days are harder than others, especially when Alice talks to him about her family - the one she walked away from for him - and he knows that she wants the both of them to return to the Cullens sometime in the future. And he feels obliged to do it, eventually, since her jumble of siblings were a part of his escape plan - the most dangerous part, if it involved aggravating Maria. But she never asks, just talks to him about them.

But mostly, he’s okay. Good, even. Animal blood is disappointing, and sometimes he’s so agitated he can’t sit still and wishes for … a battle, to run, to do something other than sit, and read, and hunt animals, and talk. Alice blames it on his newborn year, and he tries so hard to contain it, but it’s hard.

She tries to make it better, and on days that he can stand to be touched, she teaches him all the old-fashioned dances she knows, and he spins her around and sometimes it does make it better.

He’s got regrets, a laundry list of them, but Alice says that isn’t unusual; it takes very specific circumstances to be changed - especially young - and be satisfied with the final outcome. When he asks her regrets, she shrugs and admits that she doesn’t even remember being human. Leaving him unprotected is her biggest regret, and that makes her sad, which he doesn’t like the feeling of.

So he puts his arm around her, and she curls against him, and that makes the sadness evaporate, and she beams up at him with golden eyes he could drown in, and one thing he will admit is - that despite the pain and unhappiness that followed him from human to immortal - that he will never, even regret taking her hand.