#musings • jesse frost | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

multi-muse-transect · 4 years ago

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Alright, here’s a muse and rules list if someone is on mobile.

Genis-Vell (MCU)

Rin Mags Bridger/Raya Wren Bridger (SW OC)

Ishiro Serizawa (Monsterverse)

Carol Ward (Halo OC)

Monica Rambeau (MCU)

Shatter (Transformers)

John Price (COD)

Borderlands 3 Vault hunters

Kyle Halsey (Halo OC)

Wally Tannis (Borderlands OC)

Doom Slayer (Doom)

Crash (Doom)

Ace (Destiny/Kingdom Hearts)

Sydney Novak (I Am Not Okay With This)

Lydia Torres (Crysis OC)

Phyla-Vell (Marvel comics)

Robocop (Robocop)

Dokkaebi (Rainbow Six)

Mara (COD)

Forest Redfield (Resident Evil/Last Of Us OC)

Simon Riley (COD)

Conner Cage (MK OC)

Sektor (MK)

Cyrax (MK)

Ruin (COD)

Seraph (COD)

Skarlet (MK)

Wattson (Apex Legends)

Roze (COD)

Aloy (HZD)

Hal Jordan (DC)

Jason Todd (DC)

Frank Woods (COD)

Kipo Oak (Kipo and The Age Of The WonderBeasts)

Ultimis Crew (COD)

Sean and Daniel Diaz (Life Is Strange)

Rayla (The Dragon Prince)

Dokkaebi (Rainbow Six)

Caveira (Rainbow Six)

Aku (Samurai Jack)

V (Cyberpunk)

Jonathan Mason/Miller (Last Of Us OC)

Tigress (DC)

Raven (DC)

Geoforce (DC)

Sam Fisher (Splinter Cell)

Phyla-Vell (Marvel comics)

Damian Wayne (DC)

Windblade (Transformers)

Jonathan Kent (DC)

Blackout (Transformers)

Terry McGinnis (DC)

Doomsday (DC)

PowerGirl (DC)

Johnny Silverhand (Cyberpunk)

Deathstroke (DC)

Victis Crew (COD)

Masane Amaha (Witchblade)

Edward Buck (Halo)

Sarah Palmer (Halo)

Chase Devineaux (Carmen Sandiego)

Julia Argent (Carmen Sandiego)

Kate Kane (DC)

Heron (Blood Of Zeus)

Nick Reyes (COD)

Barbara Gordon (DC)

Miles Morales (Marvel)

Shion Sonozaki (Higurashi)

Liu Kang (MK)

Russell Adler (COD)

Helen Park (COD)

Kali (Rainbow Six)

Kitana (MK)

Snake Eyes (GI Joe)

Wanda Maximoff (MCU)

Grigori Weaver (COD)

Saint-14 (Destiny)

Frost (MK)

Abigail Brand (Marvel)

Mikasa Ackerman (AOT)

Sonya Blade (MK)

Boba Fett (SW)

Bo-Katan (SW)

Caveira (Rainbow Six)

Jimmy Woo (MCU)

Eda Clawthorne (Owl House)

Alex Mason (COD)

Megan Danvers (MK OC)

Jesse Faden (Control)

Alex Chen (Life Is Strange)

Revy (Black Lagoon)

Cloud Strife (FF)

Mark Grayson (Invincible)

Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Booker Dewitt (Bioshock)

Sam Wilson (MCU)

Sharon Carter (MCU/Canon divergent)

Isaiah Bradley (MCU)

American Kaiju (MCU)

Chris Redfield (Resident Evil)

Lady Dimitrescu (Resident Evil)

Ethan Winters (Resident Evil)

Jill Valentine/Captain America (Resident Evil/MCU)

Atari Kobayashi (Isle Of Dogs)

Chief, Duke, Rex, and Boss (Isle Of Dogs)

Valkyrie (Apex Legends)

Trevor Belmont (Castlevania)

Jason Hudson (COD)

Loba (Apex Legends)

Fem! Vision (MCU)

Exo Stranger (Destiny)

Mar-Vell (EMH/MCU/Ultimate Comics)

Kari Imahara/Valkyrie (Apex Legends)

Lelouch Vi Britannia (Code Geass)

Kallen Kozuki (Code Geass)

Jack Cooper (Titanfall)

Marceline (Adventure Time)

Immortal (Invincible)

Mary Somers/Horizon (Apex Legends)

Ellie Williams (The Last Of Us)

Issac (Castlevania)

Alice Shepard (Mass Effect)

Frank West (Dead Rising)

Chuck Greene (Dead Rising)

Atriox (Halo)

Ilsa Zane (Halo)

Ash (Titanfall/Apex Legends)

Amity Blight (Owl House)

Shleemypants (Rick and Morty)

Hooty (Owl House)

Melina Vostokoff (MCU)

Alexei Shostokov (MCU)

Yelena Belova (MCU)

Captain Carter (MCU)

Sylvie Laufeydottir (MCU)

Miss Minutes (MCU)

Shleemypants (Rick and Morty)

Vivian Vision (Marvel)

Vin Vision (Marvel)

Virginia Vision (Marvel)

Peacemaker (DC)

Bloodsport (DC)

Rick Flag (DC)

Amanda Waller (DC)

Kat (Halo)

Ratcatcher (DC)

King Shark (DC)

Shang Chi (MCU)

Xialiang (MCU)

Wenwu (MCU)

Natasha Romanoff (MCU/Any-verse)

Polka-Dot Man (DC)

Sabine Wren (Star Wars)

Dr. Strange Supreme (MCU)

Heist Nebula (MCU)

Marcy Wu (Amphibia)

Taskmaster (Tony and Antonia MCU)

Pepper Potts (Armored Adventures)

Tony Stark (Armored Adventures-verse)

Namor (Marvel)

Zim (Invader Zim)

Richard Rider (Marvel)

Adam Warlock (Marvel)

Ko-Rel (Marvel)

Emma Frost (Marvel)

Carol Danvers (Marvel)

Drax The Destroyer (Marvel)

John Walker (Marvel)

Jinx (League Of Legends)

Vi (League Of Legends)

Warwick (League Of Legends)

Caitlyn (League Of Legends)

Colt Vahn (Deathloop)

Julianna Blake (Deathloop)

Evil-Lyn (She-Ra/Noel-verse)

Adora (She-Ra)

Rey (Star Wars)

Trilla Suduri (Star Wars)

Clint Barton (Marvel)

Master Chief (Halo)

Hellboy (BPRD)

He-Man (Noelverse)

Nina Kovan (Halo)

Moon Knight (MCU)

VV Argost (Secret Saturdays)

Drew Saturday (Secret Saturdays)

Doc Saturday (Secret Saturdays)

Zack Saturday (Secret Saturdays)

Dani Rojas (Far Cry)

Anton Castillo (Far Cry)

Teela (Noelverse)

Hudson Griffin (Halo)

Thomas Lasky (Halo)

Chloe Price (Life Is Strange)

Max Caulfield (Life Is Strange)

Bruce Wayne/Batman (DC/The Boys verse)

Adrian Chase (DC)

Patricia Trayce (DC)

Greg Saunders (DC)

Jin Sakai (Ghost Of Tsushima)

Talanah Khane Padish (Horizon)

Tiny Tina (Borderlands)

Abby Anderson (The Last Of Us)

Tesler (Tron Uprising)

Paige (Tron Uprising)

Sasha Waybright (Amphibia)

Black Adam (DC)

Emilia Harcourt (DCEU)

Arthur Morgan (Red Dead Redemption)

Sadie Adler (Red Dead Redemption)

John Marston (Red Dead Redemption)

Chloe Frazer (Uncharted)

Salem (Halo/Predator OC)

Jin Sakai (Ghost Of Tsushima)

Talanah Khane Padish (Horizon Zero Dawn)

Abby Anderson (The Last Of Us)

Man-At-Arms (MOTU)

Salem (Predator/Halo)

Panam Palmer (Cyberpunk)

Lucyna Kushinada (Cyberpunk)

Adam Smasher (Cyberpunk)

Isaac Clarke (Dead Space)

Quiet (Metal Gear Solid)

Kratos (God Of War)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider)

Elster (Signalis)

John Carver (Dead Space)

Haruko Haruhara (FLCL)

Tarn (Transformers)

Grimlock (Transformers)

Liara T’Soni (Mass Effect)

Scourge (Transformers)

Nightbird (Transformers)

Optimus Primal (Transformers)

The Armorer (Star Wars)

Tigress (Kung Fu Panda)

Death (Puss In Boots)

Turgle (Star Wars)

Cassian Andor (Star Wars)

Samuel Petrikov/Ice Prince (Adventure Time)

Also if you want to do an NSFW RP, please tell me your age. I don’t do straight shota, loli, water sports, scat, guro, necrophilia, beastiality, and aged up muses. All NSFW threads will be under read more.

#cod rp #mcu rp #destiny rp #castlevania rp #bioshock rp #life is strange rp #invincible rp #final fantasy rp #black lagoon rp #dc rp #marvel rp #star wars rp #halo rp #owl house rp #dead rising rp #amphibia rp #league of legends rp

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conflicted-crowd · 4 years ago

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Muses and Faceclaims

Will give bios upon request

Harry Potter

Harry Potter - Daniel Radcliffe

Hermione Granger - Emma Watson

Molly Weasley - Julie Walters

Ginny Weasley - Bonnie Wright

Fred Weasley - James Phelps

Charlie Weasley - Sam Heughan

Draco Lucius Malfoy - Tom Felton

Newt Scamander - Eddie Redmayne

Severus Snape - Alan Rickman

Alexander Snape - Finn Wittrock

Victor Simon Napoleon Silverwick - Julian Morris

Donavon Andrews - Domhnall Gleeson

Nathan Christopher Wells - Luke Newberry

Scarlet Wells - Julianne Moore

Twilight

Oliver Cullen - Timothée Chalamet

Jasper Hale - Jackson Rathbone

Carlisle Cullen - Peter Facinelli

Edward Cullen - Robert Patterson

Alice Cullen - Ashley Greene

Emmett Cullen - Kellan Lutz

Rosalie Hale - Nikki Reed

Aro - Michael Sheen

Seth Clearwater - Booboo Stewart

Leah Clearwater - Julia Jones

Percy Jackson

Thomas Ryan Soleil - Calum Worthy

Theodore "Teddy" Castellan - Jake Abel

Charlotte Sienna Miles - Megan Fox

Ares - Dave Navarro

Hades - Richard Madden

Persephone - Isla Fisher

Hadestown

Orpheus - Reeve Carney

Star Wars

Zade Kalliday - Mattias Inwood

The Umbrella Academy

Allison Hargreeves - Emmy Raver-Lampman

Disney

Prince Eric - Diego Boneta

Flynn Rider - Jake Gyllenhaal

Pascal - Asa Butterfield

Pitch Black - Benedict Cumberbatch

Jack Frost (younger) - Lucky Blue Smith

Jack Frost (older) - Martin Short

Scott - John McCrea

Harry Hook - Timothy Doherty

Belle - Samantha Barks

Mirabel Madrigal - Morena Baccarin

Bruno Madrigal - Jesus Luz

Camilo Madrigal - Tre Samuels

In the Heights

Usnavi - Anthony Ramos

Dark Shadows

Barnabas Collins - Johnny Depp

Gotham

Oswald Cobblepot - Robin Lord Taylor

Jervis Tetch - Benedict Samuel

Peter "Puck" Davies - Peter Mark Kendall

Scott Pilgrim vs the World

Wallace Wells - Kieran Culkin

Schitts Creek

David Rose - Dan Levy

Patrick Brewer - Noah Reid

Ted Mullens - Dustin Mulligan

Santa Clarita Diet

Joel Hammond - Timothy Olyphant

Something Rotten!

William Shakespeare - Christian Borle

Cabin Pressure

Martin Crieff - Benedict Cumberbatch

Arthur Shappey - John Finemore

Brooklyn 99

Raymond Holt - Andre Braugher

Dear Evan Hansen

Evan Hansen - Ben Platt

Be More Chill

Michael Mell - George Salazar

Shadow and Bone

Matthias Helvar - Calahan Skogman

Fedyor Kaminsky - Julian Kostov

Genya Safin - Daisy Head

iCarly

Spencer Shay - Jerry Trainor

Freddie Benson - Nathan Kress

Atypical

Zahid Raja - Nikki Dodani

Casey Gardner - Brigette Lundy-Paine

Sherlock

Sherlock Holmes - Benedict Cumberbatch

Marvel

Samantha Barnes - Katharine McPhee

Vision - Paul Bettany

Bridgerton

Anthony Bridgerton - Jonathon Bradley

Good Omens

Anthony Crowley - David Tennant

You

Joe Goldberg - Penn Badgely

Lord of the Rings

Legolas - Orlando Bloom

Pippin Took - Billy Boyd

Samwise Gamgee - Sean Astin

Faelyn Haemir - Andrew Garfield

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

Lucifer Morningstar - Luke Cook

Hilda Spellman - Lucy Davis

Sabrina Spellman Morningstar- Kiernan Shipka

Prudence Blackwood - Tati Gabrielle

Jesse Scratch - Jay Hayden

Devin Ryder - Tyler Posey

Jordan Undergrove - Adam Brody

Stardust

Elysia - Zoey Deutch

Heathers

Jason Dean (JD) - Christian Slater Les Miserables

Marius Pontmercy - Eddie Redmayne

Friends

Monica Geller - Courtney Cox

Ross Geller - David Schwimmer

Criminal Minds

Aaron Hotchner - Thomas Gibson

Derek Morgan - Shemar Moore

Legend of the Seeker

Seraphina Renae - Amy Adams

Darken Rahl - Craig Parker

Fandomless

Rosetta Anastasia Glennwood - Dianna Agron

James Glennwood - James Spader

Sophia Ella McKenzie - Lily James

Isaiah Michael Smith - David Corenswet

Victoria Marie Julietta Harrington - Anne Hathaway

Greyson Richard Michaels - Nick Robinson

Damien Ryder Flare - Joel McHale

Travis Wright - Andrew Rannells

Daniel Storm - Cillian Murphy

Antonio Frances - Cheyenne Jackson

Jamie Taylor - Ross Lynch

Dean Taylor - Harry Connick Jr

Spencer Taylor - Evan Peters

Parker Eaton - Jonathan Groff

Tyler Eaton - Ben Platt

Warren Hall - Jordan Bridges

Xavier Collins - Tom Payne

Henry Sparks - Freddie Highmore

Axel Simmons - Chris McNally

Levi Haynes - Louis Partridge

Andrew Bentley - Aneurin Barnard

Prince Clifton Whitehall - Andrew Scott

Prince Carson Whitehall - Andrew Scott

Lane Dallaway - Ben Levi Ross

#muses

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archive-multimuse · 4 years ago

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Official line-up for post-move:

Adrien/ ( Ladybug )

Aeon/ ( Ladybug )

Alistair/ ( Ever After High )

Amity ( Owl House )

Anastasia ( Cinderella )

Ayano ( Yansim )

Ben ( Jwcc )

Ben King ( Descendents )

Brooklyn ( Jwcc )

Bumpy ( Jwcc )

Capper ( Mlp )

Cassandra ( Tangled )

Charming ( Cinderella )

Chloe/ ( Ladybug )

Cindy Lou ( Seuss )

Coraline ( Coraline )

Darius ( Jwcc )

Darling Charming ( Ever After High )

David ( Camp Camp )

Discord ( Mlp )

Dragonborn ( Skyrim )

Eggs ( Boxtrolls )

Elsa/ ( Frozen )

Eugene/ ( Tangled )

Facilier ( Princess And The Frog )

Feldspar ( Tangled )

Felix ( Ladybug )

Ferb (p&f)

Finn ( Adventure Time )

Fiona ( Adventure Time )

Fluttershy (mlp)

Greg/ (su)

Gwen ( Camp Camp )

Hans/ ( Frozen )

Hiccup/ ( Httyd )

Jack ( J&tcch )

Jack Frost ( Rotg )

Jess ( Ladybug )

Jim ( Treasure Planet )

Kenji ( Jwcc )

Kevin (eene)

Kevin (su)

Killian ( Ouat )

King ( Owl House )

Kristoff ( Frozen )

Lars ( Steven Universe )

Luz/ ( Owl House )

Mae ( Nitw )

Mal ( Descendents )

Marceline ( Adventure Time )

Marco Diaz/ ( Svtfoe )

Marianne ( Strange Magic )

Marinette/ ( Ladybug )

Marshall Lee ( Adventure Time )

Max ( Camp Camp )

Merida ( Brave )

Merlin ( Red Shoes )

Moana ( Moana )

Monika ( Ddlc )

Naveen ( Princess And The Frog )

Ned ( Seuss ) -request only; not a real muse-

Nick ( Zootopia )

Penn Zero/ ( Penn Zero )

Phineas (p&f)

Pidge/ ( Voltron )

Red Shoes ( Red Shoes )

Red/ ( Tangled )

Sammy ( Jwcc )

Shay ( Broken Age )

Sokka ( Atla )

Spinel/ ( Steven Universe )

Steven/ ( Steven Universe )

Taro Yamada ( Yansim )

Tiana ( Princess And The Frog )

Twig ( Hilda )

Varian/ ( Tangled )

Woodman ( Hilda )

Y-5 ( Adventure Time )

Yakko ( Animaniacs )

Yasmina ( Jwcc )

Zack/ ( Milo Murphy’s Law )

#tw long post #EAT SHIT AND LIVE BILL || OOC

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drsilverfish · 6 years ago

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Nothing Gold Can Stay... (15x04 Atomic Monsters)

Nature’s first green is gold, Her hardest hue to hold. Her early leaf’s a flower; But only so an hour. Then leaf subsides to leaf. So Eden sank to grief, So dawn goes down to day. Nothing gold can stay.

Robert Frost

Hey everyone, as ever, I am catching up British-time, so I haven’t jumped into your posts yet, but I’m looking forward to it!

I’m sure there are some great gifs and discussions already out there about Dean and his “man meat” grief-eating.

But I thought I’d start with Veronica and Robert Frost.

Those of you who’ve been following mine or @occamshipper ‘s musings on the use of alchemical themes in Dabb-era SPN will know that gold was highly significant to the medieval alchemists. It was their ultimate goal, to turn “base metal” (lead) into gold, and that was understood as a metaphor (or a mirror on the earthly plane) for the refinement of the soul on its journey to God.

Next week’s episode, 15x05, is titled Proverbs 17.3, and in the Bible, Proverbs 17.3 reads (King James version):

The fining pot is for silver, and the furnace for gold:

But the LORD trieth the hearts

Gold is, officially, a theme. As is the symbolic red of the heart.

As Becky tells Chuck, it’s not the monsters (ooh shade at the Leviathan, whom Chuck thinks were “great”, just like he thought the ending of Game of Thrones was “great”) which SPN fans are really interested in, it’s the emotional interactions between the characters - i.e. their hearts.

Becky, in Perez’ metafictional commentary, is the fan-fiction representative who has come to understand the SPN story better than sucky origin-writer Chuck. She knows it’s about the emotional notes, the heartfelt conversations between the hero characters (including Cas, since she shades his non-mention all too often in Chuck’s MOTW stories) - aka the real “gold” of the story.

Interesting also, in terms of alchemical colour symbolism, are Sam’s God-wound induced “red visions”, which seem to be of an AU in which Sam has succumbed to his old demon-blood addiction (symbolic of his S5 apparent “destiny” of possession by Lucifer):

I was waiting for the Ouroboros (spiral/ circular narrative) reference to 5x04 The End (in its numerical correspondence to 15x04). And here it is, because Sam in the red-vision in 15x04 speaks in a similar voice to Lucifer!Sam in The End. Dean in the 15x04 red vision is a desperate fighter and Sam has said “Yes” to the demonic, just as was the case in 5x04 The End.:

In alchemy, there are four traditional colour-stages along the alchemical transformational road from lead to gold - nigredo (blackening) albedo (whitening) citrinitas (yellowing) and rubedo (reddening). Reddening is the final stage before gold. So Sam’s red-visions, and the gold which becomes a theme in 15x04 by means of the quotation from Robert Frost’s beautiful poem, are linked pieces of alchemical symbolism.

Their meaning, I think, is that just as Amara’s link to Dean through the Mark of Cain changed Amara for the better (she learned about love through experiencing Dean’s “heart” through the Mark in S11, thus shaking off The DarknessTM to become clothed in yellow, the colour of the sun, at the start of S15), so Sam’s link to Chuck through the God-gun (of equalising/ revenge) will (hopefully, eventually) change Chuck for the better. A balance of powers - the feminine God-principle and the masculine God-principle, both learning compassion and becoming their higher selves (achieving the spiritual synthesis of “gold”) through their links to the (red) hearts of the Winchesters.

That means suffering for the Winchesters along the way, of course, as they too, undergo the alchemical process of self-transformation by (eventually) fully facing their Shadows (their unconscious); Sam’s fear of being permanently “contaminated” by the demon-blood fed to him as a baby, and Dean’s fear of abandonment (stemming from the loss of his mother) which leads him to be over-controlling and to act out and push people (ahem, Cas) away.

But back to Veronica. Veronica who quotes Robert Frost’s lovely poem in her tribute speech to her “best friend” Suzy (possibly, her lover - that subtextual reading is certainly available).

Veronica is a fascinating character, because she is “read wrong”, by Dean in particular, who thinks she’s the vampire, the one killing her cheerleader rivals in order to get the top spot. And he’s wrong because, as Sam points out, she has braces, a no-no for vamp-teeth. Dean is really sarcastic about the memorial speech Veronica is practising for Suzy, of whom she says, “I’m lost without Suzy, it’s like a piece of my heart is gone.”

Here is Dean, being a sarcastic little shit about Veronica’s emotive school-girl speech:

Of course, Veronica’s eulogy for her dead beloved, who was “gold” and thus (in her Frost’s poem analogy) was too beautiful to last in this world, is too painful for Dean to hear. It verbalises what he cannot (he can’t even bear to speak Castiel’s name, all episode):

“My best friend Suzy who I miss like she was a part of me, and in many ways she’s still a part of me.”

In subtext, Dean also reads Veronica “wrong” because he thinks she was Suzy’s rival, when in fact, she was her lover (part of a Veronica-Suzy-Billy love-triangle, the F/F element emphasised by their attendance at a school called “Beaverdale” where “beaver” is of course slang for vagina).

Look at all those red hearts (symbols of romantic love) on Suzy’s memorial pin-board, Indeed, look at all that red in general. A “match” for Sam’s “red-visions”. If Sam’s rubedo (alchemical reddening) trial is his God-wound, Dean’s is his separation from Cas:

Veronica, it seems (unbeknownst to the Winchesters) is a neophyte hunter (as well as, in subtext, Suzy’s lover) a sleuth, on the trail of whoever killed Suzy. And it looks like she knows it was a vampire. When Sam and Dean are questioning her (and she’s clearly suspicious of them) we see her with a syringe of what looks like blood behind her back, ready to jab them:

We know, from 1x20 Dead Man’s Blood, that in the SPN universe, a dead person’s blood can temporarily take down a vamp. So it seems that whilst Dean suspects Veronica of being the vampire, she suspects the Winchesters (a recurrence of SPN’s perennial - “Who is really the monster?”/ it’s not black-and-white theme. The reference to Dead Man’s Blood is also interesting, as this was an early episode in which Dean defied his father (stepped out of being John’s “good little solider”, who did see monsters in black-and-white) yet now, we have, Ouroboros-style Dean regressing to old John-learned behaviours (conceal, don’t feel) after the second death of Mary.

I love this little Veronica detail. It’s an un-explored thread in the story, a piece of fan-fiction catnip begging for further elaboration. More Perez meta-narrative, in fact, in which he suggests that, despite the sinister Chuck and his insistence on a final SPN ending with a gravestone reading “Winchesters”, the story itself is WaywardTM; it is capable of fluidity, of control being wrested from the origin-creator (God). After all, Chuck created free will, and despite his desire for total control, he cannot undo this wild-card element in the narrative, which Veronica’s little secret hunter-identity (in subtext, also, her secret queer identity) just like Becky’s fan-fic, is a mirror for.

Veronica’s citation of Frost’s melancholic poem becomes a metaphor for (Dean’s) lost love. Just as Sam’s mention in the final Impala scene, of how he still thinks about Jess often, becomes a verbalisation for Dean’s own constant (unspoken) thoughts about his own lost love; Cas.

Veronica and Billy (who were possibly both Suzy’s lovers; although in text it’s Billy, in subtext Veronica, true to SPN’s ongoing bisexual subtext in relation to Dean) exchange a memorial bracelet to Suzy in front of Suzy’s picture, as Veronica tells Billy a piece of her heart is gone:

Both are mirror images for Dean - Veronica-the-vampire-hunter who mourns excessively, and Billy-the-vampire, who has killed the person he loved (just as Dean has driven Cas away):

Dean is forced by Chuck’s authorial hand to kill Billy, who is both a representation of his own lost son, Jack (Chuck’s cruel re-staging of the scene in which Dean almost kills Jack in 14x20 Moriah) and of Dean himself (symbolising Dean’s present “self-murder” aka his self-punishment and repression re Cas):

Nothing gold can stay....

Frost’s poem is also used by Perez as a metanarrative commentary on the sadness we all feel as SPN draws to a close. Everything beautiful has its time to fade and die, Frost says; even SPN, says Perez.

Frost’s poem also makes reference to Eden, to the Fall, and how that was, in God’s plan, an inevitability; the descent from the Godly to the earthly.

It’s noticeable how, just as The Fall was presented as Eve’s fault in the Bible, Chuck is, yet again, trying to eliminate the feminine principle from the narrative, just as he has always done throughout SPN (which began with the deaths of Mary Winchester and Jess). Chuck kills Suzy, as the driver of the episode, and he “poufs” Becky (the fan-fic writer) out of existence (possibly into an AU) so he can finish the story the way he wants, just as he has re-murdered Mary Winchester (or possibly also poufed her into an AU) to continue the Winchesters’ suffering.

But Chuck’s determination to arrive at a tragic ending, an ending in which the feminine principle is still subjugated, Perez suggests, can be subverted, because the seeds of subversion are already there in the story; Veronica’s secret and subversive sleuthing (slash her subtextual queerness), Becky’s emotionally open, subversive, fan-fic, and the continued yearning of the Winchesters for true free will (not yet knowing Chuck is still actively f-ing with them) despite the burden of their grief,

If gold is the result of the final alchemical synthesis, of “masculine” and “feminine” principles, of the conscious and the unconscious mind, here represented by Chuck-the-author and Becky-the-fan-fic writer (who were once a couple, but are now broken up, just as Chuck and Amara, Dean and Cas, are currently broken up).... Then, the alchemical symbolism suggests, the darkness of the break-up stage (The Abyss, which we are currently in) can be overcome by the red (rubedo) power of the heart - Sam’s God-wound trial, his heart-connection to Chuck, and Dean’s own heart-wound trial, the loss of his (heart) connection to Cas.

Yes, we are still working on the power of love.

Love ultimately confounded Chuck’s apocalypse in S5, when TFW went “off script” and, Ouroboros-style, it can do so again in S15.

Chuck can be overthrown (transformed), Perez tells us, by his own story; and thus the story can find its own (heart-filled) free will ending.

Perhaps, after all, something gold can stay.*

*My usual disclaimer applies - none of this suggests or implies an inevitable Dean/ Cas romantic (unequivocal) textualisation.

Although, I would like to think that Perez, by including the by now all too formulaic Dean-is-bisexual subtext via bisexual (subtextual) mirroring in 15x04, is commenting, meta-fictionally, on Chuck’s (aka TPTB’s) (wearisome) eternal tendency to do this, thereby suggesting that the over-turning of Chuck’s narrative control should, by rights, also include the overturning of this formula into... something new.

#Supernatural #15x04 #Atomic Monsters #SPN meta #Meta #5x04 #The End #Ouroboros narrative #Alchemy in S15 #Alchemy in SPN #Dean is bisexual #Still subtext #But subtext IS part of narrative #As above so below #Mirroring as narrative device #Chuck Shurley #SPN metanarrative #Long post for TS

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spiral-chronicler · 5 years ago

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💫—GOOD MORNING/AFTERNOON/EVENING/NIGHT/AFTERLIFE,

Firstly, sorry for the delay in communication those who have been waiting for a reply!! I hit a weird depressive/mentally slouchy episode and my creativity just kind of went 💥!! Thought it would subside. But it didn’t. Heck.

In an effort to rekindle inspiration, I went ahead and made a blog with a muse that (for better or for worse lolol) matches this funky vibe I’ve got atm. If you’d like, feel free to follow me over my new Dabi blog, @kanashii-na , of My Hero Academia. I’ll be hashing out some verses/xover/etc. ideas for OnePiece / Bleach / and some other series this week, but don’t hesitate to interact in the meantime.

Otherwise, I will see you back here after Viral’s had a little vacation. The spaceshark is still my pride and joy, so this is not goodbye! It’s just a catnap.

Shout-out to muns Turtle, Frost, Orrie, Hayden, Snowy, Jess, && Jazzy for being so positive, creative, and supportive from the beginning. If I don’t see you over on the other blog, know that ily and that I have had so much fun writing with you!

To my other followers, thank you for all of the fun and heckin good times. I’m grateful to all of you! I’ll check in on Viral’s blog from time to time, as soon as I’m feeling more recharged, so I hope to see you around. UNTIL THEN,

SEE YA SPACE COWBOY.

#beastmun. ★★ ᑎIKO��Oᒪ ᑕᕼ��Tᔕ #Hiatus Notice

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realitybleeds-a · 5 years ago

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🎰

send me 🎰 and i’ll randomise our muse lists and give the first five as possible connections ! / accepting

lukas henshall - constance hatchaway

do i know how they would interact? no. do i love a couple of murderous bastards? yes of course you know me. also i love the concept of constance unintentionally flirting with them and lukas just panics

rafe montaigne - sarah reid

the operator probably falls just inside the line of the syndicate’s juridisction so he very well could have crossed paths with sarah while investigating the marble hornets?? depends on how well she’d react to someone else prying in

mara sov - melanie ravenswood

i STILL dont have a more modern verse for mara but honestly i can see mara’s interest being piqued at melanie’s situation in a potential quid pro quo situation (considering mara is the queen of her own sorta demiplane. destiny lore is off the shits.)

jack frost - nora montgomery

fellow spirits!!! with incredibly different vibes!!! jack would just be happy to have a friend that won’t forget them LOL

jesse faden - annie brackett

okay jesse and annie are both final girls in some respect (jesse is more of a haunted heroine because i do be maintaining my brand) but i feel like they would have a mutual respect for each other and the things they’ve gone through!!

#staticbound #and if calling out to fear should echo some remark — ( ✧ : answered. )#i would have lost my mind if the randomizer shoved lukas and manon together FJDHFKJDS #but i do vibe with all of these in some way?? lmk what you think!!

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secretswritten · 5 years ago

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@legcndaires said: ❔( for jesse ) send ❔ and i’ll list a couple muses that i’d like to throw at yours! | Accepting

Nora West-Allen

E2!Laurel Lance

Killer Frost

Kendra Saunders

#answers #legcndaires #out of secrets {ooc post}#[And like all of them tbh]

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bearlygrizz · 6 years ago

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HEY!! Guess what this is?? Yup, it’s a STARTER CALL!! LIKE this for a starter from any of the muses below!!

rules // male muses // female muses // non-binary muses

I’m off to work but will message you for muses and you can also pick if you want it be a halloweeny/autumny thread or just something regular.

BOYS:

Gabriel Bhandari

April Cameron

Elijah Chwe

Griffin Coleman-Ryder

August Evans

Bear Frost

Juan Pablo Gómez

Jesse González

Skate Henderson

Diego Hernandez

Travis Hunter

Hunter Jackson

Jonas King

Flynn Lafayette

Kody Lycan

Tyler Lycan

Ethan McGuinness

Phoenix Moon

Kye Nui

Zachary Parker

Blaise Presley

Noah Prince

Ryder Romero

Roman Sinner

Hoodie Stevens

Carter Taylor

Finnegan Taylor

Mattheo Torrez

Tomás Torrez

Andrew Visser

Winter Wolfe

Giovanni Zingaro

Rafael Zingaro

Romeo Zingaro

GIRLS:

Orion Ashford

Aspen Bianchi

Nathalia Carvalho

Maris Cole

Fallon Coleman-Ryder

Alejandra Cuevas

Erielle-Orion Cuevas

Elyssa Hardy

Margot Kaj

Bee Lafayette

Scout Lafayette

Sydney Lafayette

Luna Lux

River Moon

Julian Taylor

Alexandra Whitburn

Caeleste Zingaro

NB:

Rowan Rivers

Max Spencer

Atlas Zingaro

#starter call #indie roleplay #indie rp #indie oc #indie multimuse #independent roleplay #independent rp #open rp #open roleplay #multimuse rp #multimuse roleplay #indie descendants rp #descendants rp

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deincs-moved · 6 years ago

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debating a couple of changes:

1) roster change from current muses to the following:

luisa alver (ha, ha, she’s still here, she’s very loud, and we love her a lot)

emma whitmore (from timeless. she’s an ass. but, like jack sparrow, she’s on her own side. only not as jester jokey)

miss lint (yara’s character from the tick - whose name is janet but since we aren’t given a last name i lovingly call her janet sparks. because why the fuck not. i love angry lightning lady)

dottie underwood (bridget’s character from agent carter who also i love and who also i started a nuzlocke run with and who also keeps asking why she can’t kill the people in the game)

if i can’t convince parker to write her, i may also add whitney frost (also from agent carter. also i love her? why did no one tell me about whitney before i started ac? like yo i love her)

most of those characters are in shipping pairs - obvs i ship roisa (rose/luisa, but parker’s got rose and i don’t feel like adding her here); dottie and miss lint; emma and whitney - but they also go in fun pairs otherwise - dottie and whitney obviously are fun to play off of each other (me, looking at parker), whitney and lint are fun to play off of each other, lint and luisa (and rose, for that matter) are fun to play off of each other.

i basically have ready-made brainstormed relationships between each of these characters (and rose, because fanfic writer, and rhea because ben and started brainstorming a massive crossover don’t judge me)

right now i really kind of want to stick to characters i’m writing or have written or plan on writing in my current fics (which is why no jess, etc.) because then i’m not as worried about where is muse? because yo. muse is right there. then it’s just a switch of writing format. don’t expect them to have extensive long drawn out or superbly written bios. i don’t care that much. i love them dearly, but. i also understand that people who don’t know the canon material likely won’t interact with characters they don’t know (and, unfortunately, this is probably mostly going to affect emma and miss lint).

2) moving this sideblog over to be a sideblog to my personal.

mostly it’s just that that is my primary blog now. that’s where i hangout, that’s where i interact with people, that’s the dash i keep up with. since i’m not on the dash here, i miss memes and starter calls and stuff like that - and honestly, the connection is appealing to me.

the main problem with this is that spending so much time away from the rpc has made me realize more and more just how toxic it is. i don’t really want to spend much time in the rpc or dealing with those issues because, like, it’s tiring. i don’t want to deal with it if i don’t have to. and i don’t know that i want to have that sort of stuff on the same dash as my personal if i follow people there. most of y’all aren’t toxic. but if i get a wider interaction following or whatever, idk. i just. i will probably be super more selective - and being a sideblog to a personal will probably help with that because a lot of people might be like yo i got followed by a personal wtf and either not follow or get confused because it looks like i didn’t follow them back - i guess it fixes that issue. so. we’ll see. i haven’t really decided on that second one yet, but that’s a huge possibility. if i test it out and don’t like it, i’ll probably move them back here or just, you know, i don’t know. i love writing. i love rp. i’m just tired of the rpc, and even more so having not been in it too much for so long. y’all are great. i think it’s just the community as a whole.

#[ one with the glass ]#[ psa from bandit ]#[ and also probably no more of these fancy tags ]#[ i don't use fancy tags on my personal ]#[ they're an aesthetic thing ]#[ and i'm tired ]#[ also probably no more icons ]

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abunchofcrazyweirdos · 6 years ago

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OOC:

If youre checking out my muses page: PLEASE Ignore my blank muses. I am redoing everything and it’s in the works. Here are my muses in case you’re wondering and would like to know who they are. I do have another page of muses that is perfectly alright. If you’re wondering who they’re FCs are I will let you know too.

Noah Puckerman: (S1-6 or college).

Jake Puckerman: Womanizer of McKinley High School. Dancer/Singer.

Mason McCarthy: Twin brother to his sister Madison. He wishes that she would let him live his own life. He’s a cheerleader and singer.

Kitty Wilde: Head Bitch in Charge, her role model is Quinn Fabray. In Glee and a cheerleader.

Derek Hough: Lives to have fun and dance. Professional dancer on Dancing with the Stars. Passionate, Dedicated, and joker.

Kevin Matheson: Video game programmer, nerd, diligent, resourceful and sensible.

Brian Kinney: CEO of Kinnetik and owner of Babylon night club. Self-made millionaire. He will often put his foot in his mouth, and say things without thinking

Riley Matthews: Ball of energy. Outgoing and Bubbly. Loves her family and friends. Will try something new even if she fails.

Lucas Friar: Moved from Texas to New York. Champion bull rider, compassionate, intelligent, noble, athletic and a gentleman.

College FC for Lucas

Farkle Minkus: Boy genius. Nerd. Loves school. The teachers pet and he rather be studying than out partying with friends.

Ashton Irwin: Drummer for 5SOS. Aussie Native. Singer. Punk rocker, passionate.

Calum Hood: Bass player for 5SOS. Singer, Adventurous, Aussie

Luke Hemmings: Lead Singer, Guitar player for 5SOS. Dedicated and Aussie.

Michael Clifford: Vocals and Guitar player for 5SOS. Aussie, Punk rocker, joker, shy at times.

Harry Styles: . ¼ of One Direction. Singer plays piano and guitar. Cheeky, lovable, Baby Tarzan and curly.

Louis Tomlinson: Joker. ¼ of One Direction. Singer. Guitar player and Piano.

Liam Payne: ¼ of One Direction. Beatboxer, Singer, Batman (secretly) and Daddy Directioner. Lovable.Adorable, Puppy.

Niall Horan: Food lover. ¼ of One Direction. Drums, Singer, Guitar, Piano.

Zayn Malik: A former member of One Direction. The rapper, Singer, Doing my own thing, the tattoo artist.

Alec Lightwood: Shadowhunter, reserved, logical, charming, imaginative. Don’t mess with him. Overly protective of his sister and loved ones.

Billy Nutter: Punk, protective, impulsive, devoted, uncertain and sassy.

Nikko or Hunter Clarington: Singer, bad boy, adventurous, passionate and lives life to the fullest.

Oliver Queen: Athletic. The Green Arrow. Independent, Strong, hard-headed, stubborn and will do anything to save his family and friends.

Ethan Snow: Hard headed, bad boy with a soft side. Once his mind his made up, that’s it. He won’t budge.

Trinity White: Sweet, lovable, warm, singer and a bookworm. Can be hardheaded at times.

Evie: She will always be in the library, or with a book in her hand. She is very driven and passionate. Very intelligent.

Felicity Smoak: Team Arrow. Graduate of MIT and a hacker.

Caitlin Snow: Bio-engineer for S.T.A.R. Labs. Easily hurt so she guards herself and her heart. Killer Frost

Steve Rogers or AKA Captain America. Kicking ass and taking names. Loves to have a good time and joke around.

Clint Barton or AKA Hawkeye. Sneaks up on you if you’re not careful. Will kick your ass if you get on his bad side.

Cisco Ramon: Mechanical Engineer at S.T.A.R Labs. Intelligent, joker, laid back and Vibe.

Clary Fray: Promising art student, intelligent, guarded. Shadowhunter

Cole Pendery: Member of IM5. Dorky, a child at heart and very lovable. Cuddly panda.

Jackson Whitmore: Cocky, competitive, has a lovable side to him. On the lacrosse and swim team. (Verse: Roy from Arrow as well)

Lindy Sampson: Born in Chicago now lives in New York City. Works at NYPD in the Cyber Crimes Division. Hacker, MIT Drop out. Quick to take the blame.

Tommy Calligan: NYPD Detective with the Cyber Crimes Division. New York City born and raised. Witty, Smart and tough.

Jake Bolin: Aussie born and raised but moved to New York for job. Lawyer. Has a temper and will snap easily.

Gabe Morales: Member of IM5. Bad Boy but lovable too. Cocky.

Iris West: Daughter to Joe West. Journalist, Graduate Student. Witty, Passionate, easily will defend friends and family. Brother: Wally West.

Jace Wayland: Determined, narcissistic, expert Shadowhunter.

Connor Walsh: Law Student. Sly, Sexy, Smart, Narcissistic

Veronica Mars: Private Eye. Will accept any job that is offered to her. Dedicated to her work, family, friends and partners.

Oliver Hampton: Computer Nerd and hacker. Falls in love easily. Has to learn how to guard his heart.

Logan Echolls: Known as the resident bad boy of Neptune. Does not apply himself, smart, sarcastic attitude,tough exterior but troubled inside.

Grace: Gentle. Kind. Positive outlook on life. Surfer. Sweet.

Mack: Leader. Smart. Confident. Determined. Surfer. Singer.

Aiden: Passionate. Driven. A leader. Smart. Hardheaded

Simon: Intelligent. Finds humor in any situation. Loyal. Vampire or Human

Izzy Lightwood: Kick ass. Comfortable in her body. Keeps people in check. Breaks rules, will speak her mind.

Image result for raphael shadowhunters

Raphael: Well-dressed. Handsome. Protective.

Image result for lydia shadowhunters

Lydia: Driven. Bad ass. Vulnerable. Harsh.

Image result for Magnus Bane

Magnus Bane: High Warlock. Glitter. Perfection.

Jason: Mechanic (Motorcycles)

Josh: Tattoo Artist.

Neal: Informant for FBI.

Image result for Jess Mariano

Jess Mariano: Writer. Smart. Witty. Hot-headed/Temper

Image result for Logan Huntzberger

Logan Huntzberger: Smart. Charming. Flirty.

Image result for machine gun kelly

Ty: Your typical bad boy.

Image result for tyler young

Tyler: Closeted gay. Foster child. Dad is MIA and Mom is sick.

Image result for brent antonello

Jude Kinkade: Vice President of Devils Basketball team

Zero or Gideon: Member of the Devils Basketball team.

Noel Kahn: Your typical charming guy with a bad side. Throws wild parties.

Wyatt Casey: Outsider. Likes to keep to himself mostly.

Diego: FBI Agent.

Barry Allen or Sebastian Smythe: Singer, Forensic scientist and Student

Danny: Hockey Player.

Mickey

Ian

Chelsea

Ben

Deran

Andrew

Jughead.

Jay

Thomas

Stiles

Ethan

Derek

Theo

Liam Dunbar

Corey

Mason

Pol. Student.

Buck: Firefighter.

Ricky

Carlos

Aria

Marley Or Kara

Chris

Moose:

Cami:

Sean or Eddie:

Andie:

Blaine Anderson:

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karajaynetoday · 5 years ago

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everybody's got their demons, even wide awake or dreaming | part two

Photo credit: Jess Gleeson

Hello friends! Hope you’re having a lovely day. It’s time for part two of this series! Lizzie takes her opportunity to interview Calum one-on-one in this part. If you need to catch up on Part One, you can do that here. Onwards!

(This is a fem!OC story)

Word count: 3.2k

Warnings: none? i don’t think?

More writing here | send thoughts/feedback/suggestions here | if you’d like to be on my taglist go here

The day or so leading up to Lizzie’s one on one interview with Calum was a blur, as Lizzie tried to fix her body clock and orientate herself with how to get around LA. Her boss had offered her the opportunity to hire a rental car, but the idea of driving on the wrong side of the road was too much for Lizzie to stomach, so Ubers were the go.

Her body sometimes overslept, sometimes woke her up at 4am, so Lizzie had downloaded a yoga and meditation app to try and sort herself out. She might’ve almost given herself a concussion after toppling over while trying to do a particularly tricky pose, but no one needed to hear about that. The bruises on her elbow were embarrassing enough.

Danielle had sent Lizzie a text the morning of her lunchtime interview with Calum, confirming the time and place as they’d discussed. Lizzie had handwritten some notes for her questions, trying to contemplate what she could ask Calum that would differ to the others. Or maybe she should ask them all the same questions, and then in the piece she could compare and contrast responses? It was so hard to know what would make the best piece, especially with interviewing Calum in particular. Lizzie knew from watching other interviews, and in her group interview with all of the band the other day (and from back in their school days) that Calum was a man of few words. When he did speak, it was usually with purpose and thought, and made for some great content, but he wasn’t always particularly forthcoming. Which is why it had surprised Lizzie that Calum had volunteered for the first solo interview, but given Michael’s behaviour, she was glad to be continuing with the profile piece at all.

It was a really warm day, so Lizzie had to forego her usual blazer and jeans in favour of a long green dress with blue and white flowers on it. Her hands were sweaty as the Uber pulled up to the café Calum had suggested, and something in the back of Lizzie’s mind suggested it wasn’t just from the weather. She’d always been an anxious person, but she’d gotten a handle on it recently; this whole LA debacle had brought it back with a vengeance.

Calum was waiting for her just in front of the café, dark wayfarer sunglasses covering his eyes and his phone in his hand as he leant up against the brick wall beside the café door. He was wearing a grey hoodie and jeans, and nobody coming in or out of the café seemed to pay him any attention; but then again maybe people of Calum’s level of fame were just part of the furniture around here. It was near to Hollywood, after all.

“Hey, thanks for agreeing to meet me.” Lizzie’s voice wasn’t overly loud, but it still made Calum jump as he looked up from his phone at her.

“Of course, of course. I know I sound like a broken record, but we really are excited for you to do this piece. The new album era is something I’ve been looking forward to for a while, and - “ Calum began, smiling warmly at Lizzie, who cut him off by pulling open the café door.

“Before you start getting all meaningful and quotable on me, shall we get a coffee and take a seat?”

“A woman after my own heart. Let’s do it. Pro-tip, the brownies here are to die for.”

The café was bustling, but most of the patrons seemed to be lining up for takeaway orders. Calum stepped ahead of Lizzie and slipped into a booth towards the back, near a frosted window, greeting the wait staff by name as he went. Lizzie scurried after him, apologising as she accidentally bumped into a tall man with her shoulder bag in her haste and he glared at her. Guess not everyone was as friendly as Calum, then. She slid into the booth opposite Calum, pulling out her notebook and phone as she went.

“Is it okay if I record this? I’m not very good at taking notes.”

“Straight into it, LL? At least let a man have his coffee first.” Calum deadpanned, and Lizzie felt her face fall before she realised he was joking with her.

“Of course, sorry. Let’s order. The brownies, you said? How big are they?” Lizzie pasted a smile onto her face, grabbing for the menu on the table in front of her.

“I have it on good authority that they’re perfectly Lizzie-sized. Calum-sized, too - a real multipurpose snack.” Calum was teasing her now, but also being completely serious, as he got the attention of a waitperson who came over to welcome them and take their orders. A skinny latté for Lizzie, an iced coffee for Calum, and a warmed up chocolate brownie with a side of coconut yogurt for them each. They fell into easy conversation, about the weather, and Calum’s neighbourhood, and the other pieces Lizzie had written, almost forgetting why they were there in the first place. When their order of coffees and brownies arrived, Lizzie suddenly snapped out of her feeling of ease when she had to push her notebook and phone over on the table and remember that she was supposed to be interviewing Calum Hood, 5SOS bassist, not catching up with Calum Hood, her Year 9 science lab partner.

“Now that you’ve got your coffee, can I start recording?” Lizzie asked timidly, as she took a bite out of her brownie and audibly groaned at how heavenly it tasted.

“Depends. Will your brownie orgasm be mentioned in the article?” Could Calum say anything that wasn’t teasing her? Damn it.

“Maybe. Perhaps I’ll do a twitter thread of my trip food highlights, given that the profile piece will be under embargo until the album comes out.” Lizzie deadpanned right back, earning a smile and a small chuckle from Calum.

Lizzie hit record on her phone’s voicenote app, sliding the phone into the centre of the table. She flipped open her notebook to the page marked “Calum”, and she could see Calum trying to read her writing upside down.

“No spoilers, mate. I’ve got a strategy here.” Lizzie mused, angling her notebook so it was harder for Calum to see as he raised his hands in mock surrender.

“Well then, Ms Lawson from Junkee Australia, do your worst.” He flashed her a grin, before taking a sip of his coffee followed by a bite of his brownie (sans any groaning… that must only be a first-time brownie thing).

“So, in our chat yesterday, it was mentioned that this next album is, in some ways, a letter to your homeland, and a reflection on your journeys so far as individual artists as well as being 5SOS collectively. For you, as Calum Hood, what’s the main contribution or perspective that you feel you’ve brought to this album, and the band?” Lizzie saw a flicker of something in Calum’s eyes as she shifted into journalist mode easily, but he only paused for another sip of coffee before answering.

“I think at this point, my main contribution is balancing the collective contributions in the room. I have a lot to say, and I do a lot of songwriting, but I also think the others would agree that I’m also quite observant, so I can read a lot into things they’re saying, or not saying, and bring it out of them into the music. We’ve known each other for almost half our lives at this point, so we know each other better than anyone else, but when we work with other co writers and things like that it can be hard to feel entirely comfortable with the vulnerability you need to bring into writing a song or telling a particular story that day. I’ve got the rep as the strong, silent, shy type, I know - “ Calum paused and returned the soft smile Lizzie was giving him, as she nodded encouragingly.

“But in interviews, when I’m being asked to explain myself and validate my artistic choices, I’m immediately more defensive and protective of it, because there’s something magical about the writing room, and the vulnerability that can only exist in that context when we’re songwriting, and creating that art. The end product, which is the song or the album or whatever, conveys the emotions in a way that I could never say them with words, and the beautiful thing is that so many people can listen to it and relate to it in ways that I’d never considered before. But that’s the power of it, you know? We make these songs to express ourselves, and fulfil our creative outlets, but it extends beyond that, and that’s the part that gets me.” Calum finished speaking and reached for another sip of his coffee.

“Right. The magic exists in the studio, and on the stage, and in individual people’s lives when they listen to the music wherever they are in the world, and it’s the connecting thread that brings you together with your fans, a moment that you can share even if you never meet.”

“Exactly, it’s the universal experience, and everyone has their own interpretation of what it means to them. Pisses me off when people try and dig to find out who we wrote a certain song about, or whatever. Sometimes it is a specific person or a moment, other times I make shit up to suit the vibe of a chord progression or a concept someone’s brought to the table. It’s a juicier headline if we name and shame, but it’s not fair to the person I’m writing about, especially if they don’t have a similar outlet for a right of reply, and it’s also irrelevant, because my meaning behind a song could be completely different to yours, but that doesn’t make it less valid.” Calum shrugs as he speaks, his tone calm and nonchalant.

“Makes sense. The music can exist as art, and be open to interpretation, like everything in life. And with this album, and reflecting on your homeland… what does that mean, for you? Because 5SOS have lived almost their entire adult lives overseas, so I know it must be hard to self-determine a cultural identity that’s so strongly linked to somewhere you haven’t lived for so long.” Lizzie asks, munching down another bite of brownie.

Calum cocks his head to the side and rolls his bottom lip into his mouth, and Lizzie feels a lump rise in her throat. Had she phrased the question wrong? Was he mad? Had she struck a nerve? Fuck.

“Sorry, we don’t have to - I mean, we can keep discussing the album in a different way if you’d prefer -” Lizzie started babbling, and she froze when Calum reached across the table and rested on hers reassuringly.

“Breathe, Lawson. I just need a minute to think about a deep and meaningful response to your question. You’re fine.” Calum was speaking softly, and there was an apology of sorts in his eyes when Lizzie glanced over at him. She was about to ask him something else, when a waitress came over to check on how everything was going with their orders and offered a second round of coffees and Calum withdrew his hand from the table as he ordered another iced coffee to go, times two.

“If you could have it ready to go in about an hour, that’d be great.” Calum flashed the waitress a smile, and she shot him a wink as she headed back to the counter to update his order.

“A whole ‘nother hour? You spoil me, Mr Hood.” Lizzie joked, downing the last of her coffee and desperately hoping to avoid any awkwardness in her remaining interview time with Calum.

“Anything for a fellow Australian, mate. To answer your question, it’s strange, because yes I’ve never lived there full time as an adult, but there’s something about your home country and your hometown that stays with you, no matter where you go or how long you’re gone. Obviously, for me, my sister lives overseas, and neither of my parents were raised in Australia, but it still means a lot to me, because it’s home, you know? The industry there is… interesting, but I still think that if we didn’t have the background we all have as individuals and the band, there’s certainly a lot of decisions we’ve made and ways we’ve gone about things in our careers that are heavily influenced by our upbringings and the mindsets we all have from that experience.”

“Home is where the heart is, right?” Lizzie offers, thumbing her notebook absently.

“It’s true. But it’s also refreshing to go back and escape it all a bit, you know? None of my friends at home really give a shit about Calum from 5SOS. They just like hanging out with Cal, which is nice.” Calum shrugs, clasping his hands together on the table in front of him.

“Just Cal? Not cool guy Cal? C Dizzle Swizzle?” Lizzie bit back a grin, remembering the multitude of nicknames Cal had garnered over the years.

“Look, cool guy Cal is just my constant state of being. C Dizzle might make an appearance if I’ve had one too many, but either way, they’re just happy to see me. Or happy to tell me some home truths that I haven’t heard, or wanted to hear, so that’s important too. You can’t live in LA for as long as we have without having a good support crew to keep us grounded, you know? Even if some of the ones who mean the most to us are on the other side of the planet.” There was something in Calum’s eyes again as Lizzie looked at him, and she could tell it was more than what he was trying to say for the sake of the profile interview.

She swallowed down one final bite of the heavenly brownie, and turned the page to find her next question. Lizzie couldn’t entertain the idea of asking Calum why Michael was mad at her, because it would break the air of professionalism she was desperate to maintain; also, she wasn’t entirely sure he’d even tell her. Calum and Michael had been inseparable in their school days, and Lizzie knew that their bond and sense of loyalty no doubt ran even deeper now than then, given all of their shared experiences, trials and tribulations to date. But Calum had always been so kind and patient with her, whether she’d accidentally ruined their Year 9 science experiment, or she’d nearly thrown up on his shoes at the Year 11 formal after party, or when Michael had stormed out of the studio a few days ago and he offered her his time for the first solo interview. Lizzie brushed off the train of thought, and continued with her interview questions for Calum.

The conversation flowed easily, and Lizzie could already feel the profile starting to come together in her mind. She jotted down a handful of notes on how to adapt her questions for Luke and Ashton based on Calum’s responses, and before they realised how long they’d been chatting, the waitress returned with Calum’s two takeaway iced coffees.

Lizzie asked the waitress for the bill, but Calum waved her off.

“I’ve got it, Lizzie. Don’t stress.”

“But I can expense it! I have a receipts app, and everything!” Calum laughed at how excited Lizzie seemed at the concept of submitting a work expense claim.

“Okay, fine. You win this round.”

Lizzie pressed stop on her phone recording, and reached for her bag to slide her notebook in. The waitress returned with the bill, and Lizzie handed her travel bank card over, drumming her hands absentmindedly on the table while she waited for the waitress to come back with her card and the receipt.

“Lizzie?” Her head snapped up as Calum spoke.

“He’s not… I know it seems like he’s really mad at you, but he’s not.” It took a moment for Lizzie to register what Calum was saying.

“He’s not mad at me? He refused to speak to me and stormed out of the room the first chance he got, but he’s not mad? Right.” Lizzie couldn’t help but sound bitter as she spoke.

“I can’t speak for him, but I know him. He’s not mad, he’s just hurt about everything.” Lizzie could tell Calum was being very careful with his choice of words, and she eyed him curiously across the table.

“What does he possibly have to be hurt about? He’s the one that -” Lizzie catches herself halfway through her sentence, and squeezes her eyes shut as she inhales deeply.

“Here’s your receipt and your card back, miss. Thanks so much for visiting us today, have a lovely day!” Lizzie blinks and squints up at the waitress, who hands back her card and a paper receipt. Lizzie mumbles her thanks, and goes to stand up and slide out of the booth, and Calum follows her out of the café.

“Lizzie, I didn’t mean to upset you -” Calum’s apologetic tone had Lizzie spinning on her heel to face him once they’re through the doors of the café.

“You didn’t, Calum. It’s fine. I’m here to do a job, and I appreciate your time today, I really do. Michael and I… I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it, okay? I know it won’t be easy, but for now, I just want to focus on getting the best interview content I can from you all. That’s why I’m here.” Lizzie wrings her hands nervously, and she can feel how sweaty her palms are.

“Is that the only reason you’re here?” Calum’s tone isn’t teasing, or harsh. It’s genuine, curious, soft. He’s not moving as he stands in front of Lizzie and gazes down at her from his full height.

Before Lizzie can answer, Calum’s phone starts to ring, and he casts her another glance before stepping away to answer it. While he’s chatting to whoever’s on the other end of the line, Lizzie decides to order herself an Uber and make her way back to the hotel so she can make a start on transcribing the interview with Calum. Because that was why she was here, Lizzie told herself in her head, stubbornly. Didn’t matter about the feelings in her stomach, and the tightness of her chest. She was there to write a profile about a band, nothing more, nothing less.

“I’ve got to go and meet Ash at the studio, are you all good from here?” Calum’s question broke Lizzie out of her internal dialogue.

“Yep, all good. Thanks again for your time, Cal. I really appreciate it. I think it’s going to be a great piece, and I’m intrigued to see what comes out of the other interviews. All of them.” Lizzie’s pointed tone isn’t lost on Calum, and he grimaces slightly at the fire he seems to have ignited. Ah well. Lizzie and Michael had to sort their shit out sooner or later, right?

Right?

Calum was trying to convince himself as he strolled down the street towards his car, pondering if he’d made things better or worse between Michael, his best mate through almost his entire life, and Lizzie, the girl that he’d been sure Michael would love forever, but had walked away from in a shadow of hurt, betrayal, and disbelief. The girl that apparently had no idea Michael felt that way, or that if he did, it wasn’t justified. Someone’s side of the story just wasn’t adding up, but Calum wasn’t sure whose it was. Not anymore.

Taglist: If there’s a line through your name, I couldn’t tag you, so please message me to let me know your new URL or what the go is! @suchalonelysunflower @blackbutterfliescal @redrattlers @loveroflrh @spicycal @notinthesameguey @metalandboybands @cheekysos @ashton-trash @another-lonely-heart @queenalienscherrypie @becihadshawn @allthestarsandthemoon @wheniminouterspace

#5sos fanfiction #5sos imagine #calum hood imagine #calum hood fanfiction #michael clifford fanfiction #michael clifford imagine #ashton irwin imagine #ashton irwin fanfiction #luke hemmings imagine #luke hemmings fanfiction #my writing #everybody's got their demons even wide awake or dreaming #let me know what you thiiiiiiink #part 3 is already in the works but i figured i should post part 2 first lol oops

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