#my head is in a very bad state | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

luxettenebra · 2 years

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as far as I know, I only have one reply due, and I am very much in the mood to write, so uh, how about a starter call if anyone is interested?

#starter call #probably won't get to them tonight #my head is in a very bad state #but probably tomorrow

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hellenhighwater · 2 months

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Genuinely being a single woman in my thirties, living alone, is such a mixed blessing sometimes. I do love my house and when I'm here I literally never want to leave. But on the other hand, I do get tired of leaving to go hang out with people, even though I love seeing them. Especially because I have such a great group of friends but they live all over the place, geographically, and therefore most of them don't know each other. And I actually really love hosting? But I never have people in my house because logistically it's always more practical for me to go to them than vice versa.

But sometimes I buy new old dishes and wanna just have a little fancy wizard party, but all my guests are far away. Please may I have the teleport spell. Or a high-speed commuter rail system.

#Hazard of moving to a city where i dont have people locally i guess #a very insular city at that #and honestly i am not lonely! I have lovely freinds! But I do miss the college days of everyone basically living in walking distance #in one city #as opposed to now #where DND takes me the width of the state on a weekly basis #usually the only time there are groups of people in my house is around christmas for the family holidays #and like...in the overall balance of my life this works #me going to my people is the logical choice #and its not a bad thing #but most of my friend groups are...local clusters where I am the out-of-towner these days #which again: fine; i knew that going in when I decided to move where I did and overall its the best call #but also sometimes I want to just load up the whole crew in detroit and tell them we're heading to mine this time #dont worry there'll be fancy little finger sammiches when we get there #just give me an excuse to use the wizard plates

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divvy-div-art · 5 months

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Initiation

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aroaceleovaldez · 3 months

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emo Nico x scene Will Solace...

#pjo #riordanverse #nico di angelo #will solace #solangelo #i need them to be cringe (affectionate) teenagers okay #give me Will with a hardcore homestuck phase and streaks in his hair dyed with kool-aid and striped armsocks #date night is Will teaching Nico how to make kandi bracelets #if youve been here awhile you may know i am a scene Jason believer and the same concepts apply here #listen i just think. emphasizing Nico being emo and giving him a scene boyfriend #its very important though that only certain riordanverse chars fit the vibe to be scene kids #like i dont think Percy would be as much as i want him to be #its antithetical to his character (internalized ableism/bad self-loathing/keeps his head down)#Will and Jason on the other hand would use XD unironically and have a total ball making sparkledog fursonas #Alex Fierro. DEFINITE scene kid. Magnus is already just kind of a little emo. Sadie is a definite yes. Carter. maybe.#i think he'd be adverse at first but kinda get into it casually yknow. he'd dig kandi bracelets at least.#probably get really into linguistic breakdown of xD rAnDoM speech just for fun #Walt no but he could. like. i think he'd be open to trying it. but its not his default state.#Zia. doesnt have the energy but i kinda wanna see it regardless. i think itd be fun for her but on her own she'd lean more goth #Leo? maybe. depends. he's more into doing stuff ironically. Piper. yes. but specifically as an f-you to conventional fashion #Reyna no. Frank maybe. Hazel yes. Thalia maybe. Annabeth hmm. maybe #i think thats all the main casts. Alabaster? YES and i wanna see it.#anyways thank you for coming to my emo x scene ted talk and character evaluations in the tags

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reinabeestudio · 6 months

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Can we talk about Starlo's family cause like. How can everyone in that house be so damn pretty

#ut yellow #undertale yellow #uty #yomiel speaks #bad quality pics🔥🔥🔥#ft. Ceroba cameo in the 2nd pic (fox lady on the corner)#i like sunnyside farm :] it's such a pretty place... the music is beautiful too.... lil peace of heaven with all the green—uh. corn #then again im very biased when it comes to celestial themed stuff. this whole family just ticks all of my checkboxes 0(-(#this is also where you're informed that both brothers have pretty singing voices like his mom!#and that she used to sing before they were born :] then she stopped apparently :[#i like this family i like their farm. can i live with them /JJJ #i also like that the sons both have star heads in different forms. got dad's head shape (stars) but their mom's voice... how cute...#i cant recall if they ever state who's the older of the two so i like to think orion is the older brother ☝

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denkies · 2 years

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Some of yall do not know the difference between "media that glorifies Bad Thing" and "media that portrays Bad Thing and the audience has to use critical thinking skills" and its actually concerning

#for a bunch of ''burnt out gifted kids 🥺'' yall don't use those gifts of critical thinking much huh #media that contains uncomfortable topics (especially horror) is not glorifying said topic by default #killing stalking is the first example that comes to my head. it was just a horror series that had gay people.#wasnt glorifying the horrors at all. in fact it actually portrays the horrors as Bad and Not Okay At All #seeing our mc rationalizing the behaviours of his abuser due to stockholm syndrome is upsetting to us as the audience.#and yall were like ''it glorifies abuse and murder 🥺🥺🥺'' no babygirl. it contains abuse and murder as a subject.#you are just incapable of critical thought and you assume the portrayal of any subject is glorification. touch grass.#thats like watching hannibal and being like ''this show glorifies cannibalism 🥺'' it very much is not.#there was also the manga Star Lover that y'all were canceling for ''glorifying pedophilia'' and when you read it it's about A VICTIM OF CSA #like its literally about a character who is sexually abused by her uncle and this is an integral part to the story. its not fanservice.#sometimes media is created with the belief that the audience has the ability to think for themselves #and therefore should not have to a Explicitly State "hey this morally bankrupt concept is bad!''#because you should be able to come to that conclusion on your own <3 #media consumption #a.txt #media and information literacy #media analysis

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redhotarsenic · 6 hours

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Many many irl things are happening at the moment that’s why I’ve been gone for so long terribly sorry for that 💀

#also my brain has been shit. so. :)#yeahhh #kinda been feeling like….hmm how to describe it.#the thing that immediately popped into my head is that awful kinda painful feeling when you have a numb foot #and it’s in the middle of waking up so you don’t wanna move it because the sensation is so awful #that’s kinda my mental state right now #nice not being on social media at all very much. constant stream of discourse and bad news about the world was fucking with me too lol #everything’s been generally feeling like dragging my feet through a bed of nails. I’ll try to be fully back soon but I don’t know when lol #I guess this is me majorly isolating myself in a way? who knows 🤷#just. low energy basically #anyway #I do have art to share #which I will once I get my brain together 👍#by the way. before I go back to sleep and forget.#did I mention that I was going to participate in art fight this year? because I am :)#anyway I’ll gather up art when I wake up and dump it all on your sweet babby heads 👍

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thunderboltfire · 8 months

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What's the feeling, Anleana?

When Your own son won't look you in the eye?

(what an awful way to introduce Argo's mother, huh)

As horrible as Argo's scars are, there was time when they looked even worse - and to add insult to injury, this included his first return home since he left for his apprenticeship. Argo had a reason to leave the court - in spite of being the only living descendant of a long line of elven dukes of Riss he's never shown any magic talent, due to which he couldn't be heir to the title.

Being an ongoing liability to his house once he was of age he decided to leave his home and become a Wanderer.

Anleana was against this decision. Maybe it was the fact that she didn't want to forsake her only living child to a life of danger and neverending itinerancy, maybe, as the rumour had it, her wisdom gained her a deeper insight.

When after three years the circumstance brought Argo again to the gates of Riss, he bore a barely closed, swollen wound on half of his face, still covered with scabs. Still bruised from the latest skirmish, side of his head hastily and unevenly shaved, Argo looked like a distorted version of himself from the past.

No wonder he couldn't hold her gaze.

#Argo Riss'Aerle #OC #Isaldi #Anleana Riss'Aerle #sketch #I've had this scene in my head for a while #Not quite the return of the prodigal son but it certainly feels like it #to be fair joining a militant order was not a bad idea at all in Argo's situation #he just had a very bad timing in doing so #Anleana is a sorceress and a knowledgeable woman #not much escapes her attention and as far as everyone knows the duke is wise to defer to her judgement in many matters #so much so that the public opinion states that she's somehow *always* right #in this case she would very much like to be wrong #just once

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waterfall-ambience · 1 month

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on one hand the circumstances of damien's exile are different from evil x's because luna doesn't view him in the same way that xisuma does. but on the other hand damien's abysmal self esteem makes everything worse.

#perpetua progress notes #im not sure if im going to go through with this but #yknow how damien has this problem where they're afraid of their existence hurting other people.#and how even in arc 2 they haven't really gotten over it.#they're not very kind to themself. they eventually open up about it to avery (who is aware of it but hasnt realised how bad it is).#the problem is that one day damien completely disappears and cannot be contacted and avery fears the worst has happened.#luna doesn't actually know about this until avery tells him. and then even if they both know damien isn't dead #the fact that he's in some unknown location in an already terrible mental state is not good.#'auri why are you doing this.' i need to get the evil out of my head somehow

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mariyekos · 2 months

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One day I'm going to finish my FFXVI mega essay, but for now I think my thoughts on the game can be summarized like this:

When making FFXVI, the developers sure knew what they wanted to do, and by god were they going to do it.

Were they also going to do other things that would make those first thing better? Were they going to do other things that make a good game overall? Ehhhhh...they were going to do what they wanted to do, and invest all their time and effort into that, so surely that would be enough! Surely!

#i saw someone call FFXVI the most disappointing 8/10 game they'd ever played #and i agree 100%#it started off SO STRONG #and then. and then!!!#ffxvi #my overall rating is in fact an 8 out of 10. maybe 8.5. definitely not a 9 #i enjoyed many parts of it but by god were the lows low #some of the highs were very high too! i don't regret buying or playing the game! i'm glad i did #but yeah most disappointing 8/10 i ever played is an apt description #my opinion might be slightly impacted by my uh. mental state at the time #2023 was not a good year for me. for several months ffxvi was the only thing i had to look forward to in life #and that's really sad but that was just the place i was in. life was absolutely miserable #i played the demo and was over the moon. good things were coming! it was way better than i anticipated!#then i played the game and while i enjoyed a lot of it a lot was just tedious in a bad way #so many repeated plotlines and so much whacking you over the head with the points they wanted to make #like come on guys i am not an idiot do you really need to tell me this exact thing 18 different times #and have me go out of my way to get. reward which is just a slightly different flavor of that same thing 18 times #that's what i mean by them doing a few things very well. by god were they going to do them. and only them #graphics? beautiful. i had to stop at several points bc i was stunned by the quality.#but after you've seen a few forests and some fallen ruins it gets boring when that's it. the world was just so small and empty #yes i do support the rise up against your oppressor plotlines because that is a good thing to do but that was like. 90% of the story #(including sidequests) and it just kind of got old. why did i just spend 3 hours straight doing sidequests that gave me nothing new #made some of the sidequests feel pointless. especially because the rewards in this game sucked #uh oh i'm getting too negative so i'll end it here #ffxvi was a good game but it is not one of my faves. glad i played it but idk when i'll play it again.#erurandomness

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camelspit · 9 months

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grrr hate art

#nothing is working and i am pissed off #but everytime i take a break to like. cool off. it sucks man.#telling myself fandom isnt an obligation but it feels bad being so inactive!#especially since my last 2 art posts have been admittedly very shitty #and i cant seem to get out of this hole. god.#banging my head against the wall bc its like #if i cant contribute art than what can i do. what am i even good at.#i think most of this is probably just being caused by school beating my ass to hell #and my just like. constant state of exhaustion #shits not great rn </3

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famewolf · 3 months

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a shot of whiskey at night has been doing wonders for my nerves. not to sound like I got my prescription from a cowboy-doctor or something, but it's near instant relief

#[static]#my ocd has been worse than it has been in months and it makes me feel feral-animal levels of anxious #as a general rule I never drink; never much liked the taste of it #the anxiety has been so bad that I've been trying all sorts of remedies on top of the healthy coping tools I have in my pocket #I'm not currently insured so I can't go to my normal doctor and ask for anxiety medication #but the moment I get insurance again in June ... you can bet I'll be making some phone calls #I just need to be conked over the head and put to sleep for a month maybe that'll help #I turned to trying whiskey as a last ditch effort and I'm grateful its helped ... settles my nerves enough where I can actually sleep #and not wake up still in a state of deep stress and anxiety #do not take this as medical advice if you're experiencing anxiety/ocd #i know my limits very well and am highly aware of the downward slope that self-medicating can lead to #*gestures to my entire family* I've learned from their history and have always been hyper aware of vices/crutches #but when a man can't sleep nor think except for the constant spiral of anxiety sometimes you have to find temporary aid

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autistic-shaiapouf · 3 months

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Beginning to really wonder how much of my financial concern is manufactured and handed to me as opposed to something I'm genuinely concerned by