#my stomach hasn't dropped like that since high school

[bloomingsalma]

i think one of the most disappointing things is to see that your childhood friends have grown up to represent the kind of people you're disappointed in

[strangersteddierthings]

What's Eight Plus Seven?

Part One🦇Part Two🦇Part Three🦇Part Four🦇Part Five

"Did you ask about my sandwich?" is the first thing Robin asks him when he falls through her window. Only after the question has been asked does Robin turn on the lamp beside her bed.

"Ow," he replies, because he's landed on her shoes. One is digging into the center of his back and the other his buttcheek.

"I'll take that as a no," she swings her legs off the side of the bed, sitting up to look down at him. "You know, with the amount of noise you just made, you might as well have used the front door."

"We both know your parent's know I'm here, anyway. The use of your window is to avoid conversation with your mom. She always asks if I'm planning to propose before you go to college, or after you graduate."

Robin gags. "Don't remind me. Now get off the floor and tell me when I'm to expect lunch delivered by Eddie to Family Video?"

Steve does haul himself off the floor, then, because the shoes are painful. He joins Robin on the bed, shoulder to shoulder, and leans against her. "Sorry. I forgot to ask about your sandwich."

"I forgive you. Now, to the secondary issue of the night. Show me your knuckles."

"What!?" Steve usually prides himself at being able to keep up with Robin and her random thoughts, but this is so out of left field.

Robin just grabs the hand closest to her for inspection. It doesn't take her long to drop it and reach across him to grab his other hand. "Hmm. No signs of physical damage. Did you smother him to death with a pillow instead?"

Ah. "Har har. No. There was no violence of any kind. There was some yelling, at first, and I got the last word in-" "the most important part of any argument." "-because I screamed fuck you and then ran to my room but then... then he looked so sad about it. I even tried to a pick a fight, twice!-" "Yes, yes, your self-destructive tendencies." "-but Eddie really seemed upset by it all, which, he should. If he hadn't been a dick then I wouldn't be holding a grudge. But..."

"But you were also a dick back the rest of high school, so maybe the hurts can like... even out and go away?"

"Well, we didn't word it like that but that was the, like, ending we came to, yeah. Dustin was right. He's a dick, but like, in the same way I am, I guess."

Robin leans away from him so she can sway her body back, bumping her shoulder against his. "So, to summarize...?"

Steve shrugs. "We talked it out, I told him about Christopher and like, glossed over my parents leaving me alone all the time but I think he picked up on it. Especially after I told him your theory about why I was so attached to a cousin I saw for three to four weeks once a year."

"Hey, don't do that. Don't downplay how you're feeling or smack talk your own emotions. Those are my jobs and I'll not have you leaving me unemployed. Now come on. Let's lay down, and you can be the little spoon, and tell me all about it."

"You just don't want to see my ugly cry face."

"I don't want to see your ugly cry face," Robin parrots back as she clicks off the lamp before they lay down and do exactly as promised. Steve retells the whole night in as much detail as he can remember and Robin does spoon him, patting at his head and giving his stomach a little squeeze every time his voice goes watery.

Eddie left Steve's house with his entire worldview shifted. He hasn't felt this rocked about events since learning monsters were real. And the thing that has rocked him the most isn't learning that Steve had essentially been abandoned by his parents when he was fourteen, or even learning about the tangled web inside Steve that consists of his love for fantasy, curiosity for DnD, and grief for the loss of his cousin.

No, what has rocked Eddie, what worldview has shifted, is his perception of himself and how he has been viewing the world. Him and his fucking Munson Doctrine.

It had served him well, back when he'd first learned the word 'doctrine' in sixth grade and made his own then and there. It let him draw clean and clear lines between what hurts and what doesn't, what keeps him safe and what didn't. Befriend the lost sheep, avoid the jocks. Flight was the superior fight or flight response.

And he had made changes over the years; as a rule, don't tell the cops shit about anything, ever. Make yourself the target to help the little guy (if you're the weirdest kid in school, the others might get overlooked). Slash the tires of everyone who dunks your head in a toilet.

Those kinds of changes.

Around junior year, Eddie started selling because they needed a second income. He'd put in application around town, first, but hadn't received a single call back. Hell, four the places he applied straight up told him they wouldn't hire him so he could quit checking in on his application. He knew Reefer Rick wouldn't turn him away. Not when Eddie could get to the high-schoolers Rick knew would pay too much for too little a hell of a lot easier than Rick could.

It came with the added bonus of bullying ending for him, when the same people who used to shove him around or knock things out of his hands ended up wanting to buy some drug or another, and instead of finding Reefer Rick waiting at the picnic table in the trees out of view, they found Eddie.

This added a new point to the doctrine: charge jocks double. He'd held to that until Chrissy, who had seemed so much more like one of his sheep than a jock.

And, well, everything after Chrissy should have ended the Munson Doctrine completely. Because he'd used it to put people in nice, little boxes that made sense in his mind and that was fucking blown to pieces.

Nancy Wheeler, badass gun-owner who he watched make a sawed-off shotgun? She'd in a box labeled 'Priss, Prim, and Proper' and wasn't that a fucking lie.

Robin Buckley, who he knew withstood Russian torture and willing walked into Hell to save the world? He hadn't ever even given her a second thought. She wasn't a jock, a nerd, or a customer, so she just didn't really exist. Which is so shitty of him to realize.

And Steve. Steve fucking Harrington, who ripped a goddamn giant bat demon apart with his bare hands after biting it and then spit the blood out like every horror movie fans wet dream? Like Eddie's wet dream. Well, he'd been a real dick most of high school. That was a fair box to place him in, at the time.

But because of that goddamned Munson Doctrine, he'd been a dick to Steve first. He'd ruined any chance at even being Steve's friend.

Or he had, before tonight.

It's a really fucking humbling thing, to have your own biases thrown in your face. Don't get him wrong, at first it absolutely made him livid. It hurt, and made him defensive, when Steve didn't just accept his apology. He'd instead shot back, something about him not being wrong about who Steve turned out to be and then Steve... Steve had said 'lashing out at me first, at my reading ability, and mocking me for not being quick at math' and Eddie had felt his stomach drop.

He hadn't remembered that day, not nearly as clearly as Steve did, but Steve's words had brought the moment back to him. He couldn't recall exactly what he'd said but he remembered the feeling of satisfaction at humiliating Steve some random jock that day. Satisfaction at flipping the script and getting to be the one who wasn't hurt. He'd laughed at Steve with the other people who had gathered to watch Steve struggle to do simple addition. He'd retold the story to everyone in Hellfire after school and they'd all cheered about it, told Eddie he was right to do what he'd done.

What he remembers even more, though, is coming home to Wayne and bragging about it. Thinking of the responses he got from his friends. But Wayne didn't congratulate him. Wayne had nodded softly along with the story and then said, 'you can't be the one to hit first, Edward. You throw one to many punches and soon enough yer knuckles don't feel the pain anymore.'

Eddie had puffed up, defended himself, yelled at his uncle for defending a jock and Wayne had interrupted him there.

"He mighta been the jock, but you were the bully."

That had hurt almost as much as every punch his father had ever thrown at him. And did Eddie even learn from it?

No. He doesn't think so.

Eddie had a shit life until his Uncle stepped in, stepped up, and showed him that love was unconditional.

And he's just spent the whole evening learning about Steve, and how the love of his parents had always been conditional. (And never in a way Steve could achieve. Not that Steve had said their love was conditional, but you don't abandon a kid you love at fourteen.)

Steve's every decision until the Upside Down had happened was based on what his parents would think or want. Trying to earn his dad's respect or some shit.

Steve's dad might not have hit him, but Eddie knows an unloving father.

Jesus, all this thinking makes Eddie want a cigarette. He drags himself off his bed and to the window, which he yanks open and leans half out to smoke because this is a new trailer and Wayne asked him to smoke outside when they moved into it.

He left Steve's house feeling like they could be friends, which is great. Way more than Eddie expected. It was just also... a lot to process. A lot to take in.

Jesus. He'd never expected Steve to really be willing to play 20 questions to get to know him, either; that he was willing to set his grudge aside and try, even with his anger at Eddie wrapped up in grief for Christopher. Eddie wouldn't have been able to do it.

Not with his Doctrine in the way.

He doesn't need to change everything about himself, but he definitely needs a deep dive into who he is verses who he wants to be, or has thought himself to be. Steve admitted to bettering himself and Eddie wants to be a person worthy of being around Steve.

And being honest with himself in the quiet of his room, Eddie wants be a person worthy of being with Steve.

He's allowed to be a little delusional about it all, he thinks.

[silver-itallics]

Last Light

Warnings: canon typical violence, heavy angst, hurt no comfort, you guys will be mad at me

a/n: I was thinking about when Leigh mentioned in the saw commentary that someone wrote a monologue from Lawrence's point of view after leaving the bathroom and I wanted to write one for Adam

"I'm a liar?"

"I wouldn't lie to you."

Liar, lies. Seems like either way, Adam is getting screwed over.

He sits in the dark, dingy bathroom, his eyes still struggling to adjust. His throat is raw and aching from all the screaming and crying. Not even the hardest sex could have done that to him.

God, he's really gonna die having fucked one person.

All of his relationships were mediocre, even the platonic ones. Scott treated him like shit, the guy probably hasn't even noticed that he's gone.

Has anyone?

Lawrence is someone that would be noticed, he's got a wife and kids for fucks sake.

"I've got a family too, Lawrence! I don't talk to them anymore, that's my mistake. A mistake I'd like to fix."

One of the last things he remembers at the apartment is scribbling "Call mom?" On a crumpled post it and sticking it to the wall. The paper has probably fallen down by now. Forgotten.

Are his parents even looking for him?

Probably not. They probably haven't noticed either.

Everything that Adam does ends up screwing him in the end, just like this. But he can't really blame anyone but himself, can he? Not even $200 was worth being stuck in this bathroom. Doesn't even soften the fact that he'll probably be here forever.

The money was meant to go for his food. Not a camera, not developing fluid, not even that shiny new pokemon game Adam wanted. Food.

A necessity he barely even had.

"Why? Call it my need to eat."

He remembers snapping at Lawrence like it was the most obvious answer. But food is a luxury even Adam can't afford. The guy lives off of ramen noodles and sodas from the gas station. Sometimes he even wonders why he never gained any weight since he ate such shit.

His mom was never the greatest cook, but he'd take soggy meatloaf and unseasoned mashed potatoes any day.

At the thought, Adam's stomach rumbles. His guts ache from hunger, but he's not a stranger to it. That's usually how his day goes.

He can't even blame Jigsaw for trapping him here. But in all honesty, Adam has done so much self sabotaging, that he's probably done worse to himself than the man that left him here.

He's felt worse betrayal than when the dead man stood up, peeled the fake skin off his skull and left him here.

"Game over!"

Dead man. Adam squints in the darkness, trying to make out Zep's corpse. He's not even sure why. The first time he saw a dead body, or what he thought was one, he puked his guts out into the tub. Couldn't even keep down his latest meal.

He'll probably starve even quicker now.

The room smells like blood, and his fingers are sticky from the same substance. Not only is he a voyeur, he's a killer. Maybe his last girlfriend was right: he's too angry.

Adam isn't very good at anatomy, at least the human side of it. But he knows he broke through layers of skin and bone when he'd crushed through the hospital orderly's skull.

"It's the rules!"

Knowing now, he feels guilty. Awful, even. Guy probably had a family too, even if he was a bit of a creep. Where do you draw the line of deserving a family? What's so bad that you no longer are worthy of someone related by blood? Adam's probably the worst person to ask that.

He'd stormed out on his parents after a petty argument, an excuse to leave. One that he'd been wanting to have since he was seventeen. Somehow, he'd convinced himself that they wouldn't accept him, even if they let him drop out of high school and didn't even call the cops when he left. But was that tolerance or pure disinterest?

Maybe he's not a total waste of time, since his mom had called not long before he got his power knocked out the same way he was.

"Adam, your father's not angry anymore."

Lawrence had a home, a family. A good one, too. The pictures he saw of Diana and Alison made him crack a smile. At least before the one with them tied up. He shivers, probably both from disgust and blood loss.

His shoulder aches, oozing blood all over his shitty thrift store clothes. Adam understands why Doctor Gordon left. He has some place to go, people to welcome him home with open arms. Most places Adam went, he wasn't even noticed.

He kicks with his right foot in anger, the chain rattling as he does. The metal bites into his skin and the amount of pain he's in is just frustrating at this point. Adam screams, but his voice is raw and broken.

As much as he hopes the doctor will come back for him, at least he has half the brain to know that Lawrence probably won't make it. The man that he's had the first physical touch from in months is probably bleeding out in the sewers, and there's nothing he can do about it.

He doesn't even have a choice to cut off his foot like the doctor did. Sure, the blood loss will probably kill him, but Adam is sick of waiting around for something to happen. A job to drop, a phone call.

But he can't even do that.

The hacksaw he found in the toilet had snapped in half. A result of his ever consuming anger. Seems like everything he does leads back to that.

"I see a strange mix of someone who's angry, yet apathetic. But mostly just pathetic."

If Adam isn't angry at the world, he's angry with himself. He feels like a waste of space on the good days and a tumor on the face of the earth on the bad ones. At least with photography he felt like he had a purpose, even if it was supplying creeps and weirdos with material. He wasn't really helping anyone, was he? Even Tapp ended up dead.

But Lawrence helps people. Even if he thought the guy was initially a jerk, Adam admires him. Misses the man's blood stained hands as he cupped his cheeks.

"I wanted to be a vet."

That way, he'd benefit the world somehow. Even if he was pulling tennis balls out of dogs' throats or cleaning up puke every day. He'd much rather smell vomit, as he's getting quite sick of the coppery scent of blood.

"That's nonsense. I've seen kids with brain cancer graduate high school from a hospital bed."

"They got further than I ever did."

Adam has been pretty able bodied his whole life. While he'd consider it a nuisance that his body doesn't match up with his own view of himself, that's not a disability.

Maybe his parents wouldn't even mind, maybe they'd help him with the cost of surgery and injections. But he hadn't even told them. His parents barely know who he is. Adam barely knows himself.

"What do voyeurs see when they look in the mirror?"

Nothing. The answer is nothing.

He's like a leech, sucking the energy and luck out of everyone around him.

Now he's left to sit in his own grave- metaphorically and literally. He probably won't even have the luxury of being buried or cremated.

Hopefully someone will come around and put him out of his misery. Like a calf with two heads or a dog with rabies.

But until then, he's left to wait.

[witchwyfe]

fine line 2: make you mine I sh

I pairing: steve harrington x female reader

I précis: part 2 to fine line

I content/warnings: cursing, fluff, kids helping steve, mentions of food

I word count: 1,736

Steve still hasn't returned your scrunchie.

It's been a week since you put it in his hair, and he's seen you almost every day since, but is selfishly keeping that piece of you to himself. It sits in his nightstand drawer along with a stupid note you wrote him freshman year of high school, and a polaroid of the two of you at your first party.

Now he's driving, mildly distracted by the sweet scent of your perfume and the inflection of your voice. You're telling him a story but he's having a hard time focusing.

"Steve, what are you doing? You're gonna miss the turn!"

"Shit," He jerks the wheel to the right, taking the turn way too fast, hissing as he watches you grip onto your seat for support.

"You want me to drive babe?" You offer, half-joking.

"Nah, I'm good, sorry sweetheart. I totally blanked for a sec."

"Okay." You frown, eyes coated in concern. "You gonna be okay to get Dustin?"

"Yeah, you sure you don't wanna come?"

You smile softly, glancing out the window. "Nah, it's your time together. Plus Nance and I are going to the bookstore later."

He nods, slowing down significantly as he pulls up to your house.

"Okay. We're going to the arcade if you decide to join."

"I'm gonna get you that book I was telling you about."

He groans, leaning his head against the headrest. "Babe, don't waste your money on me.

"Stevie, I know you don't like to read but I think you'll like it if you try it."

"Let me give you the money for it then. And I'll try it, just for you."

"I'll read it to you." You offer, leaning down to grab your purse from the floorboard.

His heart flutters, chest warming at the thought of you reading to him, maybe his head in your lap and your hand in his hair.

"Okay, call me, have fun with Dusty."

"Love you, bye."

"Love you too, Stevie." He watches you until you get inside, eyes melting at the little wave you give him before shutting your front door.

Dustin is waiting on his porch when Steve arrives, so excited about their plans.

"Hey buddy," Steve smiles widely when Dustin plops himself into the passenger seat.

Dustin scrunches his nose when Steve ruffles his hair.

The drive to the arcade is quick, Dustin rustling through all of Steve's tapes until he finds something he wants to listen to.

Dustin runs ahead, leaving Steve to climb out and lock up his car himself. At least he stayed buckled in until the car was parked this time.

Steve's not looking when he walks in, shoving his keys in his pocket, so he doesn't notice that Max is also at the arcade, huddled with Dustin at Pac-man.

He see's Dustin's cap covered-curly head and makes a beeline, eyebrows furrowing when he notices the redhead girl as well.

"Hey Max." He greets casually. "Did you get dropped off here?"

"Walked." She answers curtly, despite the soft look in her eyes. "Dustin and I need to talk to you."

His heart drops, stomach twisting at the seriousness in Max's tone.

"What's wrong? Is everyone okay?"

"This is your intervention."

"Excuse me?" Thick brows furrow, the skin of his forehead crinkling.

"Did you ask her out yet?" Dustin asks, not looking up from the game machine.

"What? Ask who out?"

"Shut up Steve." Dustin huffs.

"You asked me a question!" He sighs exasperatedly.

"____! When are you going to ask ____ out?"

Oh.

"Why would I ask her out? She's my best friend."

"Steve." Max levels him with a look. "We know you're in love with her."

"I--, no..., she's not, I don't--" Steve flounders, tongue tied and cheeks red.

"Steve." Dustin speaks now, finally turning away from the game. "Don't even attempt to deny it. We all know it. You're in love with ____ and she's in love with you."

He sighs heavily, chin dropping to his chest. "You don't know that."

"Have you seen the way she looks at you!?" Max exclaims, looking shocked by her own little outburst.

In just the week since the great scrunchie exchange, the kids have paid more attention to your and Steve's behavior even more.

Like A few days ago, you and Steve had taken Dustin, Lucas, and Max to get ice cream.

Steve's engrossed in what the kids are telling him--a funny story from school--so much so that he doesn't notice when a drop of ice cream doesn't make it all the way into his mouth, a chocolate dribble slowly sliding from the corner of his mouth.

The kids notice but don't say anything, slowly dissolving into laughter and poor Steve doesn't know what's going on.

"Steve," You sigh fondly, setting your own ice cream down so that you can lean in. "Come here babe."

He leans forward, a pout on his wet lips, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

You slide your thumb against the corner of his lips, wiping up the tiny ice cream spot, before pulling away, looking at him affectionately.

"You had a little something bub," You smile, before licking the tip of your thumb without a second thought.

"Oh," He chuckles awkwardly, pink dusting his cheeks and nose. "Thank you."

Or when the kids begged Steve to take them to see Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and he hadn't taken his eyes off you for the entire movie.

They don't know how you didn't notice, but the two of you are so incredibly enamored with each other, it doesn't leave much room for noticing things that are painfully obvious to everyone else.

Steve's angled in his seat, enough that he can still check on the kids if they need something, and enough that he looks like he's focused on the screen in front of him. He's not.

Steve sighs heavily. "That doesn't prove anything..."

Before he loses too much of the confidence and courage the kids pumped him with, Steve heads over to your house.

And now he's in your driveway, second guessing himself, a bouquet of red roses in the passenger seat.

"Steve!" He hears your voice before he see's you, sticking your head out of your bedroom window. "What are you doing here Harrington?"

"I came to see you!" He calls back, getting out of his car, flowers in hand.

You meet him down at the front door, looking up at him quizzically.

"How was your night with Dustin?" You wonder, nudging the door so he can get in.

"Good, yeah it was good." His free hand comes up to scratch the back of his neck, sweat blooming on his palm.

He see's the paper bag on your couch, the bookstore's logo printed on the side.

"Did you get anything good?" He wonders, face flushing. He knows he needs to tell you but he's scared, terrified in fact.

"Oh yeah!" You look up from where you were fiddling with the television remote. "Do you wanna see? I got that book I was telling you about."

He nods distractedly, adam's apple bobbing in his throat. "Yes, show me."

Steve has a hard time processing anything you're saying. You've got a few paperbacks laid out on the coffee table and you're explaining each one, your voice all excited and breathy. He's listening, he swears he is, it's just hard to not focus on how glossy your lips are or how big your smile is or--

"Steve?"

Shit.

"Yeah? Sorry sweetheart I was zoning out for a sec there."

"I know," You smile softly. "You've been so spacey today, is everything okay?"

"Yeah," He rushes out quickly, stumbling over the single syllable. "Actually no, I mean," His tongue fumbles the words again, cheeks growing hotter, especially as he feels your soft gaze on him.

He heaves a deep breath, exhaling slowly, giving himself to collect his thoughts, or at least try to.

"I have to tell you something."

You frown, worry flickering in your eyes. "Steve what is it? You're scaring me."

"I uh, kind of maybe think I'm in love with you." He blurts out, the red on his cheeks spreading exponentially.

He worries at first that he spoke too quickly and you didn't hear it, but the grin on your face sets him straight.

"You what now?" You play dumb, looking up at Steve through your lashes.

"Don't tease me." He whines, running a hand through his already ruffled hair.

"Fuck," He sighs suddenly, straightening up his posture. "I was gonna do this better. Confess for real not just blurt out my feelings like an idiot, was gonna do the whole thing with flowers and shit but you're right here and you're so pretty and I love you so much, I just had to--"

Once he gets most of his point across, you surge forward, cutting him off with a firm press of your lips, breathing in the words that died on his tongue.

"Finally." You murmur, fondly tracing your finger down his jaw.

"What?"

"Finally," You sigh. "The kids came to me last week, I've been waiting for you to say something."

"Apparently it was so obvious they shouldn't have needed to say anything."

"So I've been told." You smile, hand still on his face, warm skin against warm skin.

"If you knew why didn't you say anything?" He wonders softly, curiously.

You shrug. "Dunno. Guess I was nervous that maybe they were wrong. You're a nice guy Steve, I was like no way he's into me like that."

"I'm not that nice to anyone else." He gives you a pointed look. "And yes, he is very much into you like that."

You giggle, leaning in to brush your nose against his.

"Can I kiss you again?"

"Thought you'd never ask."

You revel in the warm press of his mouth on yours, leaning forward to tug the strands of hair at his nape. Your eyes flutter open with a thought, laughter spilling from your lips into his.

"Wait," You giggle, breathless and quick. "Is that why you threw those flowers on the porch outside? Tossed them aside before I opened the door?”

He groans, embarrassment evident in the sound. "I didn't want you getting suspicious before my big moment."

You cackle against his mouth before his hand is cupping the back of your neck, thumb rubbing against your skin.

"Stop laughing at me." He whines.

"Never. Give me another kiss."

© witchwyfe 2022. absolutely no reposting, translating, or modifying, even with credit.

[enam3l]

love, lola / chapter nine pt.1 / going solo (5.7k)

Eddie’s arrived in California, leaving you behind, to start his new life as a rockstar.

thank you for 1.2k of you kind angels!!!??? and thank you guys for your patience, life has been hectic with work and school and after the anniversary of eddie’s death (but not in this fic baby) i thought fuck it imma post what we got for chapter 9 - I hope it’ll all be worth the wait

a/n: sex drugs and rock and roll - no fr there is graphic sex here

series masterlist / follow #enam3l love lola for instant updates / my other work / now available to read on AO3!

comment for tag list. requests open for prequel stories.

California is too fucking hot. That is what Eddie Munson has learnt since moving. Far too hot for hair like his and definitely far too hot to stay hidden behind the safety of his leather jacket. After years of the mind numbing mundanity of Hawkins, Eddie was propelled into the fast pace L.A. mindset. Each morning for a moment his heart hammered, wondering where he was until the palm trees outside the window reminded him it definitely wasn't Indiana. The apartment the record label had set him and rest of Kraven up in was definitely not the trailer - maybe the size of every single one in the park combined.

So far, everyone had been nice; a niceness you're not usually privy to when you're known as 'The Freak'. Kraven were excited he accepted the offer and their label and manager had heralded him the hero of the hour. But a nagging part of Eddie couldn't ignore the feeling that this wasn't really his band, he was a replacement. There was a brotherhood between the bandmates long before his arrival and it's hard to ever truly assimilate with a bond like that. Regardless, he was there, escaped the confines of his small town and now living the dream of becoming a rockstar. This was always the fantasy, wasn't it?

September 2nd 1986

For the first time in his life, Eddie is sat in a real life, high tech, actual recording studio. A far cry from Gareth’s egg box insulated garage. An egg shaped chair swallows him whole which feels tediously symbolic of his time so far in California. Everything is much bigger than him. As the band and producers play him the demos they have already, with hopeful looks on their faces, he resorts to anxiously twisting the rings on his fingers. They're a tangible reminder of home. He thumbs them in order. Skull. Pig. Cross and bones. Mom's. But now there's a new edition - yours. 

It made its way onto his finger as you said your final goodbyes in the airport terminal and it hasn't left since. Between runny noses and weepy eyes, Eddie frowned as you withdrew from a hug that had already lasted several minutes (which was still not long enough). 

'I have something for you, Teddy,' you confess as you sift through your bag. 

'You already threw the party, sweetheart. Whatcha wasting money on me for?' He sighs. 

The protests were not what you wanted clearly as he's met with a silencing finger until you finally found what you were looking for. Now you chew your lip anxiously, fumbling with a little velvet pouch. 

'It's not for going away... it's - well, I gathered, this will be the first time since we met that we've not spent our birthdays together...' 

Eddie's stomach drops, he had not gathered that. 'Oh...' he murmurs.

'So, I thought I'd give you your present now. I guess. If that's okay?' 

Totally thrown, he only blinked and nodded. Taking his hand, you lay his palm out flat and shake the pouch until Eddie hears a little clinking, then feels cool metal on the skin. 

'It's the big 2-1, y'know. I wanted us to have something special. I couldn't think of anything to buy. But, I - uhhh - I could think of something to make.' 

Finally, he moves and inspects your gift closer. Two silver rings, perfectly imperfect. Carefully, he spins them round until he can finally see what the feature of them is. It causes him to gasp and you to resort to nervously stumbling over your words. 

'I was taking a silversmithing class at college and I was thinking about your rings and then I thought I could make you one. Then I thought I could make us some. Matching ones. For our birthdays. It's silly. They're not professional or anything. Y'know a little wonky. Just thought it'd be nice...'

Eddie balls his fist up, clutching the precious contents and closes his eyes to swallow up a sniffle. One ring has E for Eddie on, the other identical except for your initial. 

'Wonky? Y/N... they're perfect. This is, holy shit, this is the most amazing thing anyone has ever given me...'

The compliment makes your insides fizz. 

'Are you sure? I mean, I was gonna tidy them up more but when you were in hospital. When I went back to New York... I brought them back with me. Just incase... y'know...'

Just incase Eddie never made it to his 21st is the unspoken ending to that sentence that you both understand. Eddie takes your hands in his and squeezes. The rings shielded by your conjoined palms. 

'Thank you, sweetheart. Thank you... put it on me! Go on! Make me your little hand model m!'

As usual, Eddie's theatrics ease the tension and force you into giggles. 

Carefully, you slide the E ring over Eddie's finger. He prompts you to place it on the bare one next to where his Mom's old ring resides. Then, he takes your hand and delicately places your own ring onto the matching finger. To the rest of the people in the airport, it must've looked like the exchanging of vows between two lovers being forced apart. Really, they wouldn't have been entirely incorrect. 

‘So what do you think man?’

Eddie breaks his daze to be met with a room of hopeful eyes. 

‘Huh?’ He murmurs. 

‘The demos!’ The manager Chris encourages, ‘for the album! These are what the guys have put down so far. Love em?’

Eddie’s brain stumbles over what will be the correct thing to say. The songs bad? God no, there was a reason the bad were signed. But were they what he would do? Not really. It was clear they were angling as more commercially marketable, less niche like metal, a more digestible rock. Taylor was more Iggy than Ozzy. 

‘Yeah, yeah they’re tight,’ Eddie scrambles, praying he didn’t appear rude. 

Already though, his brain has calculated how he would rearrange each element of the songs, what lyrics he’d tweak, how he’d make it his own - but he has to remind himself that’s not why he’s here.

‘We want a single out for Christmas. Make a big splash over the festive season. Hit the talk shows, the radios. Get you boys out there. Build up the hype for a Valentine’s album release,’ Chris cheerfully continues.   

‘But don’t forget, none of these songs are finalised,’ a rough voice from the corner of the room interrupts Chris’ ambitions. 

Riz, the producer, sits like the mastermind behind the console in his swivel chair. His skin weathered and tanned, littered with scribbled tattoos not unlike Eddie’s own. Tired eyes that have seen too many young ambitious bands and their teams come in and out of his studio, are concealed by thin tinted glasses. A mane of salt and pepper curls, some formed into dreads cascade past his broad shoulders. A real old school rocker. 

‘Oh well, yes, yes of course,’ Chris fumbles, ‘plenty of room for your inputs Eddie.’ 

It’s clear Chris is entirely intimidated by Riz’s presence. His clean cut Armani suited self a direct contrast to the producer’s rough look. One is the face, the other is the real brains.

‘Speaking of, Chris, why don’t you take Taylor, Spike and Keith to lunch. Use that gold card the label bestowed upon you whilst me and Eddie get accompanied?’

Eddie shoots round to look at Riz, used to his name being called out as the signal he’s in trouble. But when he meets his eyes, they only offer warmth and a small smirk; something Eddie had yet to see him crack so far. 

‘Oh are you sure?’

‘Yeah, yeah, lots of technical things I need to adjust now Eddie is with his. Go on,’ Riz practically shoos Chris out the door. The rest of Kraven following suit, amused by their manager’s nervous babbling. 

Finally, once the door is shut and locked, Riz returns to his throne, spinning round and looking at Eddie expectantly. 

‘Well, come on then,’ he chuckles, smacking his tattooed hand against a leather chair beside him. Eddie immediately scrambles over, Sweetheart safely in her case towing behind him. There’s an awkward silence as Eddie toys with his guitar case, desperate to avoid Riz’s piercing gaze. 

Nonchalantly, Riz swings his feet up onto a nearby stool and reclines in his chair. 

‘So… you hate the songs,’ he chuckles.

Eddie finally looks up to gawp, scrambling for a response. 

‘No, I don’t, it’s not, I never said I-‘

‘It’s cool brother. You’re a metalhead. They aren’t a metal band. They’re not your first choice, no sweat.’ 

Riz, in just a few minutes of knowing each other, has called Eddie’s bluff. The tone in his voice is not anger or judgment, it’s just matter of fact with a hint of amusement. 

‘They’re not my first choice either, sound wise. I’m a lot more old school myself, personally. But, fuck, you know what, those boys got more star power than anyone else who’s been brought to me in the last two decades.’ 

Eddie nods eagerly. There’s a reason he was honoured Kraven had asked him, they were really fucking good and most surprisingly - nice. Riz eyes the boy before him, big brown soulful eyes that scream there’s a story behind them. 

‘I think you’re an old soul like me though, Munson. Let me guess… you’ve got notebooks full of lyrics in that case of yours?’

A beetroot blush flushes Eddie’s cheeks, he’s been rumbled and stutters an agreement. 

‘And I bet you’ve never shown anyone either, huh?’

Two for two. 

‘No, never. They’re all a little… personal,’ Eddie murmurs. 

‘All the best stuff is. So what you’re gonna do is get them out and show me who the musician Eddie Munson really is.’

With an eagle eye, Riz combs through the tattered pages of scrawling lyrics. Words dating back years. The afternoon flies by as Eddie demonstrates the melodies he wrote for each with Riz adding his own input. 

‘Well, Munson. I don’t think Kraven or the label know what they’ve accidentally come across with you,’ Riz scoffs. His fingers gloss over the stacks of song lyrics Eddie’s unveiled. 

‘And you better be marrying this girl you’re writing about. Ain’t heard love songs like this in a lifetime.’ 

The way Eddie nervously shrinks in on himself over his words isn’t lost on Riz, things rarely ever are. 

September 21st 1986

‘TWENTY ONE MOTHERFUCKER’ 

Raucous laughter and cheers manage to erupt over the booming club music. The fine spray of champagne, more expensive than his trailer, soaking Eddie’s curls. The women that had crowded the booth, struggle to get in the stream of booze. Liquid gold dripping from their open mouths and exposed cleavage. No, this was not the usual Munson birthday set up.

Despite attempting to keep his twenty-first birthday a secret, Eddie had been rumbled. Chris’ assistant Sammy had discovered his impending celebration after going through files. That was spilt during bedroom talk with Spike the bass player who she’d been hooking up with. Spike then mentioned a small night with the boys to Taylor and Keith to celebrate, which was overheard by manager Chris. So now due to Chris’ inability for subtlety, the boys found themselves in an exclusive WeHo club, surrounded by bottomless bottles, scantily clad girls and yes men - all courtesy of the label. Eddie was light years away from where he’d usually spend his evenings round humble drama room DnD table or with lukewarm beers in Gareth’s garage.

After three weeks of locking themselves in the studio when the sun had begun to rise, only leaving well after, the band were finally letting loose. The guys had all told Eddie their tales of L.A’s debaucherous rock’n’roll night life; the secret places where other musicians mingled, where dealers made their money and girls got the memorable nights they went looking for. But so far, he’d yet to experience it and now he was, Eddie wasn’t sure it was for him. A rainbow of pills scattered the table without discretion, he could tell they were far better quality than the shit he used to sell. Servers came with an endless supply of bottles, money no question. A far cry from the gruff, stingy bartenders at The Hideout. The clientele is a far cry as well. The girls that had flocked to their booth looked straight off a Hollywood set. One busty blonde sat on a bewildered Chris’ knee, his eyes desperately trying not to focus on the cleavage that bobbed below his chin. Spike was making it clear he and Sammy weren’t exclusive as a brunette and a redhead sat either side of him as they purred in his ear. Taylor had disappeared into the crowd, ever the life of the party, surely feeling the effects of the pills he’d let fizzle on his tongue. Out of everyone, the only person Eddie felt envious of was Keith. 

Nestled happily in the corner of the booth sat Keith and his fiancee Grace, lost in their own little world. The pair had scoffed when a girl had tried to luck with Keith, knowing hell would freeze over before he left Grace. High school sweethearts who had made it work as he’d followed the path of wannabe rockstar. She was no eager groupie or ditzy model, Grace was a lawyer; officially Kraven’s lawyer. Put together, fierce and completely soft on Keith - reminding Eddie of you. Although, they were a real couple, best friends and lovers, exactly what Eddie had failed in making the two of you. When they whispered private jokes or sleepy appeared from their bedroom, his heart panged with envy. Mind racing with questions of how they managed to make it work. Who made the first move? How did they know it was mutual? How did they know it wasn’t a mistake? All the questions he fretted over when his lips burnt with desperation to meet yours.

Eddie’s wishful gaze is interrupted by a sudden touch to his thigh. Eyes wide with confusion, his head spins round and are met with a fluttering pair staring right back at him. The stranger’s fingers tucking rogue curls behind his ear causes Eddie to freeze. A touch too intimate to receive from anyone but you or his family. 

‘Your hair is nearly as long as mine,’ the girl drawls. Long nails still trailing up his shredded jeans and now up his exposed bicep. Whether she hadn’t noticed Eddie’s bewildered look or had just chosen to ignore it, the girl pressed on.

‘The boys told me you're the new lead guitar… I think you’re definitely an upgrade, honey.’

Eddie gulps, Adam’s apple bobbing nervously. So far he had been able to avoid interacting with these legendary California girls. Throwing himself into rehearsals with the band and his own late sessions with Riz long after the rest of the guys go home. Women weren’t on his radar. Everyone dull in comparison to the shine he knows radiates off you. 

‘Urm, thanks,’ he mumbles, trying to squirm out of her grasp.

‘And he’s a little shy?’ She giggles, ‘sooo cute.’  

Eddie’s eyes, wide like saucers, scan the surroundings rapidly, desperate to escape this uncomfortable encounter. He wasn’t interest in a hook up, the thought unimaginable and he definitely didn’t want this. He’s desperate for you more than ever now, wishing for your soft touch, wishing it was your tipsy words being whispered in his ear. His birthdays weren’t for sharing with random hookups, they were always reserved for you. After being separated by your college, Eddie was giddy at the thought of getting to spend your birthdays together again. But now you were torn apart again, now even further apart. 

Finally, Eddie spots his opening. The girl leans over to the table to pour another drink, her grip on him loosening. Quickly, he darts up, hopping over everyone’s legs and abandoning the booth as the girl calls after him. Eddie’s feet seem to take him away before his mind is even sure where he wants to go. Hand’s planting on the bar top, causing an unexpecting bartender to jump, Eddie pleas,

‘Is there a phone anywhere I can use?’

The bartender nods, finger jabbing to a corridor beside the toilets. Shouting a thanks behind him, Eddie shoots off in the direction of the promised phones. 

Frantically, he punches in a number he’s known by heart for most of his life. Ringed fingers twist round the cord anxiously and the dial tone hums over the vibrations of the club’s speakers. 

Eddie’s breath hitches as the other end picks up and fumbling can be heard. 

‘H-hello?’ Your sleepy voice croaks. 

It’s the best noise he’s heard since he arrived, better than anything he’s heard in the studio. 

‘Hi,’ he whispers shyly, ‘it’s me, it’s Eddie. I’m sorry, did I wake you?’

Your giggle makes his stomach churn. 

‘I know it’s you, Eds or should I say birthday boy? No, no, it’s okay. I was already awake.’

‘Are you okay? Are you sick?’ He enquires desperately. For a moment, Eddie is sure he hears a hesitation in your voice. 

‘No, no, I - urm, you know, just one of those nights. I’m fine! It’s nice to hear your voice.’

Eddie for once is grateful for the distance that separates you for seeing the blush that spreads across his cheeks. 

‘It’s really nice to hear yours too. I’m sorry I’ve not been keeping up with the calls, it’s all just -‘

You interrupt before he falls into a spiral of apologies. 

‘Eds, it’s fine! You’re a rockstar in training, I don’t expect you to be missing all the fun to be calling me every second.’

‘But, I want to, sweetheart… I wish you were here,’ he sighs. 

‘I wish I was too… but this your adventure. This is everything you’ve ever dreamed of.’ 

Eddie desperately wants to let the alcohol coursing through his system to take ahold of his tongue and confess no, you’re everything I’ve dreamed of. But he doesn’t. Your voice chirps up again, trying to dispel the sad silence that took over the line. 

‘So, how’s your birthday? How is being 21? Are you not out and drowning in booze and those Cali girls?’ You’re chuckling but he doesn’t laugh. 

‘No, no I’m out with the guys. But, urm, no Cali girls. Definitely not.’

Eddie’s not sure if you let out a relieved sigh or it’s just wishful thinking. 

‘You’re out?! Eddie, what on earth are you calling me for!’

Your scolding tone makes him grin. He can picture perfectly how your brows are furrowed and how if you were in front of him your hands would be flailing animatedly. 

‘Cos birthdays are our thing. You’re much better than this club full of fuckin’ posers.’

‘Yeah, they are. Am I now? Are you trying to flatter me, mister?’ 

‘Always, sweetheart.’ 

The pair of you giggle down the phone. His dimpled cheeks aching from the grin you inspire. As the giggles finally subside, Eddie hears you attempt to disguise a yawn and remembers how once again distance keeps you apart. 

‘Guess I should let you get to sleep then, huh sweet?’

‘You should go and enjoy your birthday more importantly!’

Eddie huffs, knowing such a thing is impossible without your presence. 

‘I’ll try… I’ll speak to you soon, promise.’

‘Don’t worry about it, Eds. Whenever you have time!’ 

‘I’ll always have time for you. I’ll make sure I at least call you on your birthday.’

‘You better,’ you sleepily smirk, ‘it’s two days after yours, you’ve got no excuse to forget.’

‘How could I?’

Eddie rakes a hand through his curls, knowing he needs to hang up but it’s too hard to let you go. 

‘Get some sleep, sweetheart. I miss you.’

‘Goodnight Eddie, I miss you too.’ 

The line goes dead and once again the only sound filling his ears is the throbbing base. Trying to replay your words in his head, Eddie flops against the wall. Eyes closed tight as he wishes it was you he was breathing in rather than the cloud of perfume wafting from the women’s bathroom nearby.

It’s only when he can feel a presence beside him does Eddie open his eyes. A woman mirrors his position against the wall but faces him, a wicked glint in her cat-like eyes. Taken aback by her close proximity, Eddie jumps causing her to giggle at his squirming.

‘Whatcha waiting for cutie?’

Eddie continues to shuffle away, the phone your warm voice once echoed out of, now uncomfortably sticking into his back.

‘Was just… just using the phone…’ he murmurs nervously.

‘Oh?’ she cocks her head, auburn waves tumbling, ‘and here I thought you were waiting out here for some fun.’

A slender manicured finger reaches out, tugging at a bewildered Eddie’s bottom lip. He stutters as his brain scrambles for a response. Another awkward round of full frontal flirting from random girls. The thought of supermodel groupies throwing themselves at him was somewhat appealing when he was a raging hormone of a teenager. But even then, you were still in the back of his mind on a pedestal, now you live there front and centre. Eddie recoils from her touch, swatting her hand away.

‘No!’ he surprises himself with the firmness in his voice, ‘M’sorry, not looking for anything.’

The girl scoffs a ‘whatever’, rolling her eyes and flouncing off. Just as Eddie finally feels his body relax, a snigger from the corner catches his attention. A frame steps forward from the shadows. 

A man, also in his twenties, grins an infectious smile that makes Eddie feel a little giddy. Shorter than himself, but broader, tanned muscles that glistened with sweat from dancing.

‘I think she’s a little disappointed,’ the guy chuckles.

‘I really was just using the phone!’ Eddie insists.

Gradually the two move closer towards each other, Eddie drawn in by the piercing pale eyes that never leave him. Despite the corridor being much cooler than the dance floor, heat bubbled between their bodies. 

‘So… Eddie, are you definitely not looking for any kind of fun?’

October 31st 1986

Now in the depths of autumn, the madness of life had only increased. Kraven had found their sound with the addition of Eddie, days spent mastering their sound in the studio. When out of the studio, the boys sat round meeting tables listening to suits spew corporate jargon about their mastermind ideas for selling the band. That was his least favourite part, hearing his existence and passion whittled down to money making schemes. It’s also where Eddie was forced to tackle the idea of fame. Seeing his name in small print under photographs of the band, plastered in pages of music magazines about the next hot thing. Personally, he found it mortifying but Wayne insisted it was proof of him achieving his dreams, whereas you cackled down the phone at the surrealness of it all.

At the end of the day, Eddie buried himself in sheets of paper, attempting to put into words the feelings that brewed inside. Trying to heal the internal wounds the events of the year had left, whilst being a thousand miles from the people who actually understood. Vocalising the sadness he wished he didn’t feel over achieving his dreams of making it but not with his own band. Then as ever, trying to find an outlet for the love he felt for you that bubbled with fervency in your absence and 

with every stolen phone call. Then, a couple of times a week, Eddie would present his lyrics to Riz to make sense of, during after-hours at the studio. A secret project the two of them found themselves falling into outside of Kraven. That was another source of guilt, that his heart and soul weren’t invested in the band in the same way Taylor, Spike and Keith’s were. That he reserved the heartfelt work for himself, letting his real passion erupt during the late night sessions with Riz. 

Then there was another output Eddie found for his pent up frustrations about his overwhelming emotions and suffocating new lifestyle. A way to let go in a way that didn't leave him ashamed as if he had betrayed you. The guy at the club on his 21st birthday had opened up possibilities that Hawkins had limited. Small town life was oppressive, he didn’t need the rumour mill buzzing with fresh stories that the satanist Munson was also a sodomist. Whilst Taylor and Spike drowned in girls, Eddie became comfortable seeking out something else in the bars and clubs they’d frequent. It was easier, less intimate. He didn’t need to worry about coy teasing, didn’t need to exchange names and take girls home. Eddie could find release down the back of another guy's throat, quick and hot in dark corners and back allies. He was unsure if his bandmates had realised and was anxious that they’d reject him for it but that was another issue forced to the back of his mind, stored in another box overflowing with anxieties. 

Halloween was decided as a good marketing angle for the band. Their name added to the line up of hot new rock bands performing at an infamous West Hollywood Halloween party. Something thrown by a record executive’s tabloid covering daughter that had become notorious enough to be spoken about on MTV. Eddie being no stranger to a costume and outlandishness being second nature to Taylor, the pair had put themselves in charge of putting together the band’s costume. 

‘This is pretty hardcore you guys,’ Spike admitted, ‘didn’t think you’d pull it off.’

The four cramped into a backstage room at the venue, getting ready for their performance. Eddie’s tongue stuck out in concentration as he finished painting Spike’s body. All four of them were skeletons. Leather trousers and boots embellished with white paint, creating the illusion when on stage they were void of flesh. Their torsos mostly exposed aside from frankly decorative scraps of leather. Spike in long leather sleeves that covered wrist to arm and left the entirety of his chest exposed. Eddie and Keith both in tight leather waistcoats. Then Taylor, naturally, entirely topless aside from some leather wrist cuffs and mask that made him appear as a devilish gimp. All exposed skin had bones painted on top which was now Eddie’s current job. 

‘Of course we did,’ Taylor boasts, ‘you really doubted our little DnD nerd’s ability to put together a costume?’

Eddie splatters paint in the singer's direction. Even if they weren’t his friends from home, his band mates had become real friends. Their bantering is interrupted by the door opening and a fallen angel with a clipboard appearing. 

‘You guys gotta be outta here in like a minute, the band on stage are wrapping up and you’re next.’ Her sentence is finished with a pop of her bubble gum and the slam of the door.

After final adjustments to the costumes, the boys file out to the side of the stage. Eddie’s chipped black nails gripping at the neck of his guitar. The usual pre-show jitters causing his stomach to flutter. 

‘You good brother?’ Keith whispers, a reassuring firm hand bracing Eddie’s shoulder. 

‘Yeah, yeah, all cool, I mean y’know aside from usual pre-show nerves,’ he shrugs. Keith nods with understanding, spinning his sticks - a nervous tick Eddie has come to notice. 

‘Damn, you better at this fuckin rockstar shit than me. My heart feels like it’s about to fall out my god damn asshole knowing who’s in that audience!’

Quirking an eyebrow, Eddie warily responds,

‘What do you mean… who’s here?’

Keith’s eyes bulge at his bandmate’s obliviousness. 

‘Holy shit, you got no gossip rags in that little town of yours? This party is infamous. It’s some real Motley Crue as shit out there. Full of rockstars fuckin heiresses n shit! Little Miss Clipboard said mother fucking Slash is here!’

Before Eddie can even clear his now dry throat to respond, the sound system booms with the excited announcement of the MC.

‘Next up is rock’s hottest new band… Kraven!’

The cheers are muddled by the ringing in Eddie’s ears, his body seized up until Spike nudges him along. With a gulp, he steps out into the spotlight, trusty axe in one hand whilst the other spins the ring you made him. 

Dripping sweat causes the paint to bleed down Eddie’s exposed skin. Unsteady hands grab one of the bottles of whiskey thrusted upon them once the band exited the stage and merged into the party. Eddie’s ear’s still buzzed with the raucous applause and hollering that erupted once Kraven finished their set. Immediately after they were mobbed by names he’d read on the backs of cassettes he couldn’t afford in record stores. Producers, lyricists and fellow musicians, all congratulating and praising him - Eddie the freak Munson, the kid who grew up awkward, poor and unwanted. The change of pace in his life was surreal; after a lifetime of critical fails, he’s been rolling nat20s. 

A soft evening breeze provides Eddie with as much needed respite as California weather can. The surrealness of inside was getting to him. Skin sticky from sweat induced by the growing crowd of important people with his name on their tongue. His name. Eddie Munson.

‘Eddie Munson?’

It takes a moment for Eddie to realise that voice wasn’t coming from inside his head. A few feet before him, leaning against the roped barrier a guy peers with his head cock. Soft flopping quaff falling into his curious eyes. A cowboy. Blue wash denim waistcoat with nothing underneath exposing taught tanned muscles. A tanned cowboy hat pushed back so it hangs off the back of his neck.

‘Uh, yeah, yeah… can I help you?’ 

The guy shrugs, hands sliding into the back pockets of tight jeans and rocking on the balls of his cowboy boots. 

‘Nope. Just thought it was you. Saw you perform, you were great. More talented than most of these rockstars,’ he scoffs.

‘Oh, I - I don’t know about that. Thanks, I guess,’ Eddie fumbles over his words, eyes focused downwards at those damn cowboy boots.

With a chuckle the guy responds, now daring to move forward, strong hand adjusting Eddie’s waistcoat. 

‘See, you just proved me right. Most of those guys would’ve agreed and definitely wouldn’t thank me…’ 

His fingers brush over Eddie’s jittering own. 

‘Need a light for that?’

He pulls up Eddie’s hand that holds a long forgotten cigarette that remained unlit. Gulping, he nods. The mystery cowboy draws nearer, a zippo and a cigarette for himself materialising from inside the waistcoat. 

‘I’m Max by the way,’ he smiles as he takes Eddie’s cigarette and places it into his agape mouth for him.

‘I’m Eddie…’

‘I know, babe,’ Max whispers, his own cigarette in his mouth now.

The tips of both cigarettes almost kiss as the distance closes between the two men. The zippo crackles alight, the flame illuminating a pair of wide chocolate eyes staring at a charming pair of green, both sets of pupils dilated. 

‘Holy fuck, I knew you were big. Could see it on stage in that tight ass leather,’ Max groans. Metal scrapes on marble as Eddie Munson’s ringed fingers grip at a bathroom countertop as the man he met moments ago pumps his aching cock. Finally the tension built up inside him from the pressure of the evening was on the brink of dissipating. Huffs of air escape his mouth as Max drops to his knees, long tongue flicking at the drip of precum. 

‘Knew you’d taste good as well,’ he smirks.

‘God damn, shit,’ Eddie pants as warm lips caress his tip, he struggles to contain himself. His hand lunges out, grabbing at Max’s soft locks. ‘Shit, my balls, suck my fucking balls.’

Pliant, Max does as he’s told, firm balls popping into his mouth causing wild bush to prickle at his face. After a few luxurious sucks, he’s hauled back to his feet and Eddie’s previously shaking hands are nowhere to be seen as he swiftly unbuttons denim.

‘I can’t be the only one to play show and tell.’ 

Eddie smirks as he watches green eyes flicker in bliss as his fat cock is released from its denim cage. Tanned to match Max’s toned body with a pretty pink head, fair pubes trimmed neatly. A real pretty boy. 

‘No wonder you were so confident,’ Eddie chuckles, ‘knew you had that ready and loaded, huh?’

Max whimpers now he’s the one to receive relief from another’s hand. Eddie tugs his chin to force eye contact. Only a moment can they maintain contact before both men are chest to chest, jerking the other off, a mess of precum leaking between them. Open mouths and tongues flickering at each other, spit swapping. It’s dirty and hot and far too filthy for this fancy carpeted bathroom.

Pushing aside a wail of pleasure, Max uses a free hand to fumble inside his waistcoat until he brandishes a foil square. Eddie arches a brow.

‘Jesus, just, just fuck me before I cum,’ Max pleads. 

The desperation makes Eddie snigger but it’s mutual. 

Quickly, the man is bent over the counter, ass exposed as Eddie’s warm spit drips down. Groans echo as his thumb circles over Max’s tight hole, slipping in as both men’s dicks twitch in suspense.

‘P-please, fuck me,’ he grunts.

‘Alright, alright. You ready cowboy?’

Moans echo off the tiles as Eddie eases into Max’s asshole. The pair’s eyes meet in the mirror they face until he tops out and his head drops into denim. After a moment, Max begins to wriggle beneath, fucking himself on Eddie’s cock until the message is received. Eddie braces himself, fingers digging into hip bone as he begins to drag his length in and out. 

Eventually the air is thick with heat and the sound of skin on skin. Full balls slapping against each other. A ringed hand against a plush asscheek. Feral groans and whines of pleasure. So loud that no head is turned when the bathroom door bursts open.

‘What the fuck is this shit?!’ A new voice booms off the tiles.

Eddie and Max’s heads snapped round to the figure in the doorway. The pair caught, trousers round their ankles and Eddie balls deep in a stranger. The image is too incriminating to be anything other than it was. He was exposed and the sweat from the impending orgasm now runs cold. There was no hiding.

-----

damn who tf at the door? my man didnt even get to nut in the hot cowboy

tag list: @tlclick73 @probablyin-bed @fangirling-4-ever @booksarekindaneat @azydrateanatomy @sadbitchfangirl @fluffybunnyu @big-ope-vibes @beam86 @midnightsgetawaycar @stevieharringtonswife

[doctorbrown]

DOCTOBER '23 ⸺ 「 29 / 31 * 2023 」

June 27, 2023

❝Anything you've gotta say, Ellie, you can say it. I promise your old man can handle it,❞ Marty says, giving his daughter the very same look he's given Doc time-and-time again when he was absolutely serious.

Ellie rolls her eyes. ❝All I said, Dad, was that you should probably sit down. Not that you'd have a heart attack or something. I've got news, that's all.❞

Marty's expression immediately sours as his mind leaps to worst-case scenarios. Trouble, he thinks, my baby girl's gotten herself into trouble, hasn't she? He can't help the way he worries and Ellie, upon catching sight of the shift in her father's expression, immediately frowns.

❝I didn't even tell you the news yet! At least wait before you start making faces like that!❞

Marty waves a hand. ❝Sorry, I'm sorry. I'm just afraid you're about to tell me you're about to join some gang and you've already gotten bionic implants you haven't told me about.❞

Jen snickers at his side and Marty sputters. ❝Hey, it's not funny, Jen! You've seen what those things can do.❞

❝Oh Marty, relax.❞ Jen puts a comforting hand on his shoulder. ❝At least let her tell us the news before you start overreacting.❞

He huffs but says nothing else as Ellie mouths a silent thank you to her mother.

❝Now Dad, you remember Dan, right?❞

How could he forget?

He still remembers the day when Ellie, nineteen, brought him home for dinner and introduced him as her boyfriend, much to his dismay. Sure, he and Jen were high school sweethearts, deeply in love and already envisioning a future together at that age, but it was different with his daughter.

Daniel Locarno, a software engineer, with his hazel eyes, kind face, and short blonde hair, always looking at Ellie with that look in his eye, like she was the only person in the entire room.

He was a nice boy, all things considered. Never did anything to prove otherwise. Jen certainly liked him. Marty had no real issues with him.

❝I'm not senile yet, y'know.❞ Jen doesn't even try and hide her grin, nor does Ellie. ❝Of course I remember Dan; what's this got to do with him?❞

Ellie and Jen share a look that makes Marty deeply suspicious and he starts to suspect he should have heeded her warning and taken a seat when he had the chance.

❝Well❞—it's only now Marty notices that she's standing with her hands clasped behind her back like she's hiding something—❝I told you that we were going on holiday for about a week and a half.❞

To Denmark. He remembers.

Marty nods slowly, unsure if he really wants to hear the end of this story.

Ellie's eyes sparkle and dread drops a boulder in his stomach that could crush him. ❝Dad, Dan proposed! He asked me to marry him and I said yes. We're engaged!❞

She finally pulls her hands from her back to show off her ring and the diamond doesn't hold a candle to the size of the rock currently weighing Marty down. He tries to smile, but all he can feel are his eyes threatening to fall out of his head as he stares.

Jen beams, clasping her hands together in a show of excitement. ❝Honey, it's beautiful! And about time, too. You've been dating for six years now. Your father didn't work up the nerve to propose until '89, but when he did, oh, it was so romantic.❞

Marty waves his hands. ❝Wait, wait, wait! He didn't even ask me! Your dad gave me hell when I asked him for his blessing!❞

❝My dad was convinced I was making a mistake dating a musician whose music probably wasn't going to go anywhere. Don't you remember the look on his face when your band announced they were going on tour?❞

❝Yeah I remember, but that's not the point and you know it.❞

Jen clicks her tongue. ❝You know things are different now. It's been almost forty years since then.❞

Marty narrows his eyes as alarm bells blare in his mind. ❝You knew, didn't you?❞ Jen shrugs, but the unapologetic smile on her face gives her away. ❝And you didn't tell me! How long did you know this was happening?❞

❝Oh, probably since the end of last month.❞ Marty has to remind himself how to breathe. ❝You were out at the studio when Dan came by; he told me everything. I gave him our blessing.❞

I think I need to sit down after all.

❝So, have you decided a date yet?❞

[deeeelightfuldee]

How much did your senior prom dress cost you?

I am pretty certain it was like 300 bucks, but I don’t really recall that for certain. It was a lot of money for us at the time, i know that much

What dreams have stuck with you since childhood?

Some repeated nightmares, stuff like that. Nothing worth putting in the effort to try and remember lol

Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

yes

Did you ever take your dog to school?

no, tbh he would have been such a wreck, but man i would have loved his company. I miss him so much.

If you had had a baby in high school, what would you have named him or her?

hahaha in hs all i loved was the name emma and the name matthew

If you had a baby now, what would you name him or her?

I have such a long list of names i love right now. A little more uhhh different?

Have you ever seen someone throw up on a plane?

Yes. so bad for them and for everyone else lol

Do you get motion sickness?

I very much do.

Has God ever healed you of anything? If so, what?

Yeah i mean like broken bones, illness, etc.

Do you find church fun or boring?

I really enjoy going to church

What do you hate the most about summer?

The heat and the sunshine. I just so despise it.

Which part of your body is the most muscular?

My legs probably

Did you ever take Latin in school?

Yes actually

Which major holiday is closest to your birthday?

Fourth of juy <3

What is your favorite Japanese name?

Never given that any thought, i would have to look at them.

Have you ever ran a cash register?

A lot.

Did you collect Bratz dolls when you were younger?

No. my parents thought they were trashy.

Do you think your mom is attractive?

Shes very, very pretty. For sure.

What was the last thing that disappointed you?

Loooooooool. Theres a lot lately. Im disappointed by stuff with K.. stuff with our family, stuff with relationships.

Do you like the feeling in your stomach on a big drop on a roller coaster?

i dont go on roller coasters but i think i know the feeling you mean and ummmm no.

Skeletons or scarecrows?

scarecrows

Do you own pumpkin earrings?

no

What computer game did you used to play all the time?

Tonka, where in time is carmen san diego, barbie riding club, Arthur's reading race, freddi fish

When was the last time you read a book?

Right before gram went on hospice I was reading a book every day and a half.

Would you allow your children to date prior to 16? (assuming you want any)

Ooooof. It wouldn't be enjoyable. Teenagers are rebellious and I would be a bit skeptical.

What was the last restaurant you made a reservation at?

Ummmmm online maybe. But I dont ever.

Which app on your phone do you tend to get the most notifications from?

Bingo

What is something you gave up on after many failed attempts?

Ummmmmmm. No idea …

Do you watch political shows?

no not if I can help it

Do you play any fantasy/roleplaying games? What?

Not really no. i used to love sims but it takes up alllllllllll the space on any phone or computer

Do you like salami?

Yeah it's fine. I don't do it often

When was the last time you ate meat?

Yesterday. Then promptly threw up

What was the last hot drink you drank?

Hot chocolate

Have your parents met your boyfriend/exes?

My dad hasn't. My mom has

Do you know how to say I love you in at least 4 languages?

Yes

Do you find the sound of a cat’s purr relaxing?

Omfg yea

Do you know your mum’s first pet’s name?

Choco

Would you ever want to be famous? If so, for what?

not really, no. If I had to, then for something moving and cool

Would you ever get a heart tattoo or your back?

I suppose? But no. I don't forsee any tattooosssss.

What fruit can’t you stand?

Mangoes gross.

Do you know anyone autistic?

Do I know people who have autism? yes

How about someone bipolar?

Do I know someone who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder? yes

What do you consider private to you?

Romance, health, most things tbh lol

Name somebody you know who deserves a better life than they have:

michelle

Name something that you’re good at but don’t like:

Mediating. I dont mind it if its like friends i guess, or people that im completely unbiased or unfamiliar with. But i hate hate hate it when its like mom/gram, siblings, etc. noooooope.

Name something that you’re bad at but DO like:

Journaling consistently

Name somebody who has tried to help you and ended up hurting you:

Kile, zack

Name a date that has a lot of significance to you:

July 10, feb 2, november 11, dec 25

Name something in your life that was a blessing in disguise:

Oh boy. I need to think about that one

Name something that you’ve done that would be considered rebellious:

Went out over curfew, “trespassed”, stole when i was a toddler lol

Name something you wish you had enough money to do:

Have my own place, have a car, buy makeup/hair stuff, go to the doctor, etc

[penny-nichols]

Uhh maybe 1 random headcanon you have on each Gavinners members and each Global characters

(Also sorry to hear that you’re not feeling well rn, hope everything become better soon for you :c)

- Feychols swap anon

Thank you Feychols swap anon you are so sweet :) Anyway hmmmmm... Gavinners: -Klavier has some burn scars on his hands from the. uh. fire guitar incident. (I don't know how burn scars work) -Daryan went to Themis to become a defense attorney (in a very "competitive with my bff in a fun way" way) but dropped out and just became a detective after finishing Normal School. He's not NOT smart he just didn't want to put in the effort for all of it and honestly. Same. -Luke can be "surprisingly" morbid sometimes. It's not that surprising to people who know him because like. He works with dead bodies all day but to some fans who forget that he's not just an uwu soft boy? seeing him say something like "Yeah if I was trying to kill me I'd slit my throat and then whack me over the head with my own drumsticks but that's just me." is jarring. -Brandon can sew but only a little bit. He knows enough to make. a tube. He needs his long flowy dramatic headbands but it CAN'T fray if it frays he will actually snap so he just makes really long tubes. He is a stronger man than I. -Ham didn't even go to Themis or anything and Klavier and Daryan didn't know him in Middle school because he was in 8th grade while they were in 6th, he was mainly introduced into the friend group via Brandon. (especially since Brandon actually got Into Law Enforcement before the Gavinners were really a thing) uhhhhh Global time: -Penny and Cody are basically siblings to each other now. I know they haven't met in canon but stfu Penny helped him sneak into the studio and they're besties -for a few of his embarrassing preteen years Cody had a minecraft stop motion youtube channel where he just played with his plastic figures. It never got THAT much attention, but if anyone had bothered to watch, they would've noticed the oddly high camera quality and the guy playing Minecraft Steve who kinda sounds like the steel samurai -Will isn't ugly he's just scary to kids looks wise because he has resting kinda mean face. He didn't reveal his face for a while BECAUSE of the kids but you absolutely KNOW that both members of the LGBT community and midwestern suburban moms go fucking wild for him -I think it would be funny if John was lactose intolerant. I was gonna say "probably not lmao" but Zheng Fa is a fictionalized representation of China so he's at least half Chinese and rates of lactose intolerance in Chinese kids his age are about 40% and up to 92% at Adulthood. Basically if John's stomach hasn't betrayed him now it'll DEFINITELY betray him later. -uhhhhh Jack Hammer really resented Will. Part of the reason why he intended to frame Will for Dee's murder is that if he had to be stuck on some crappy kids show he should at least be the star but this guy's first foray into Hollywood nets him a leading role? Unfair -Oldbag doesn't really have any family left so she keeps busy by taking too many jobs and telling people to call her Grandma (please call her Grandma she's so lonely) (yes this is my way of trying to reconcile whatever the fuck was up with her employment situation in AAI and the T&T credits) -Adrian really likes cats. Maybe she adopts Shoe or something IDK - Dee did care about like. Actual Movie Production Quality to SOME extent. She cared about it more pre-Manuel's death but she's still going to be overly critical of Sal's scripts -Sal has not read homestuck. he doesn't know what a Homestuck is. He gets multiple comments a day on his social media things from fans who want to know if he is meanwhile Penny is laughing nervously in the corner (only one person at Global has read Homestuck and I want you to guess who it was) -Matt also likes pet rats along with cats. IDK why I just think he'd vibe with them. They're just little guys. friends you can put on your shoulder. He can't HAVE any because of Shoe but he admires them from afar. Penny shows him Neil Bangin Out The Tunes and he fucking loves it. His phone lock screen is him and shoe. His home screen is Neil.

[lostinthewiind]

Piss Off Your Parents - Part 5

Ukai Keishin - Haikyuu

Synopsis: freshly turned 18, you want to prove to your parents that you aren’t a child for them to push around anymore. First, get a job at the local corner store. Second, use the store owner’s 26-year-old son with piercings and a cigarette addiction to piss your parents off. Third, accidentally fall in love.

Rating: PG13

Warnings: arguing with parents, stereotyping?, reader's parents just being generally horrible people, angst

Song → 18 by Anarbor

Previous → Part 4

Next → Part 6

"This is a horrible idea," you whispered to yourself as you got ready in your bedroom mirror, unable to concentrate for more than five minutes without a small panic attack taking over.

Your eyes flicked over to your clock every few seconds. Keishin was due to arrive at your family house for dinner in about thirty minutes and with every minute that passed, you asked yourself over and over again why you ever agreed to this.

Originally, when your parents had insisted on meeting your 'boyfriend' over a family dinner, your heart had dropped into the pit of your stomach; it was the worst feeling you had ever experienced . . . until you told Keishin about it jokingly and he actually agreed. Never before had you felt so sick to your stomach. Dinner was the last thing you wanted, and to make it worse, it was going to be dinner with your parents and fake boyfriend.

Shit.

More than once you had contemplated pretending to be sick or throwing yourself down the stairs, but you just couldn't go through with it. Every time you got close to backing out, a small part of your brain reminded you that this dinner might be the thing that changed your parents mind, and even though the odds of that actually happening were close to none, you couldn't give up without even trying.

So, with knots in your stomach and your palms sweating like never before, you continued getting ready for the evening and prayed that everything went as smoothly as possible.

If only you had known then that it would take much more than a prayer to save this evening.

When you heard the doorbell ring approximately thirty minutes later, your whole body froze and the thought of jumping out your second story window was starting to sound really appealing. But then, you remembered that it would be way worse if your mom or dad answered the door before you could so you rushed out of your room and down the stairs.

"I've got the door!" you shouted throughout the house, almost as if you were marking the front door as your territory and trying to scare anyone else away from it.

Standing in front of the door, you drew in a few deep, calming breaths before plastering a forced smile across your face and pulling the door open. Let the night of hell begin.

As soon as your eyes settled on Keishin, your smile faltered and you gasped. His dyed blonde hair was slicked back like usual, but instead of a headband, it was clear he had used gel. He had every hole in his ear stuffed with a black earring, and to top things off, he had showed up in jeans, a black t-shirt, and a leather jacket.

"What?" Keishin took a step back and examined his outfit. "You said to go all out. I did."

"I know, I know . . . I just . . ." You took a moment to compose yourself. "I didn't even know you owned a leather jacket."

"Yeah, well, you don't know everything about me," Keishin smirked devilishly, proud that he still had a few secrets to himself. "Well, are you going to let me in? I kind of want to get this dinner over with."

Opening the door wider, you stepped to the side and let Keishin inside your house. "You and me both," you agreed. "You sure you want to do this? We could both make a run for it right now if we act fast."

Shrugging the jacket off of his shoulders, Keishin shook his head. "Come on, at least give your parents a chance to change their minds."

Just then, your father's heavy footsteps could be heard exiting the kitchen and approaching the front door where you and Keishin stood together. Swallowing hard, you wiped the sweat from your palms on your clothes and sent one last pleading thought up to the heavens above, hoping that if there was a great being up there, they could be on your side tonight.

This was it. No turning back now.

"If your boyfriend has arrived, Y/N, please don't keep your mother and I waiting. Introduce us." Your father rounded the corner, stopping in his tracks when he set eyes on Keishin. Sure, you had told your parents all about your 'boyfriend', which was why they had insisted on this dinner in the first place, but Keishin was a man that words couldn't quite capture. "Oh. Hello." Your father reluctantly held out his hand to greet Keishin.

"Hello, sir." Keishin shook your father's hand without hesitation. "I'm Ukai Keishin. Keishin is fine though."

Seconds later, your mother joined the three of you. She had a similar reaction as your father had and was not subtle about it in the least. "So this is the man you've been seeing?" Your mother gave you an almost pleading look, like she was silently begging you to come clean and admit that you were joking.

Right off of the bat, things were not going well.

"Well, let me take your jacket and hang it up in the closet." Your mother stepped toward Keishin with the fakest smile you had ever seen on her face.

"Oh, there's no need." Keishin hung his jacket on the banister of the stairs. "I'll just end up taking it out in a little while anyway when I go out for a smoke. It's easier this way, but thank you."

You watched your mother's eye twitch and the smile she had forced threaten to crack. "You smoke?" You could tell that both of your parents were on the brink of snapping right then and there, but they had promised to actually get to know Keishin, and despite all the horrible things your parents did, breaking promises was not one of them.

"I do." Keishin grinned. "I know, I know, it's not good for me. Y/N tells me to quit all the time so I'm trying."

You let out a nervous chuckle as both your parents turned to face you. "Shall we head into the living room?" You started ushering everyone into the other room, hoping to change the subject as quickly as possible.

"Yes, let's have a seat." Your father nodded slowly, his eyes never leaving Keishin, watching him like a hawk. "Can I get you anything to drink, Keishin?"

"Just a water is fine, thanks." Keishin had obviously decided not to push his luck too hard because you had been fully expecting him to ask for a beer.

With that, both your mother and father disappeared into the kitchen; your mother to finish dinner and your father to collect the drinks.

Taking the brief moment of reprieve to breathe, you looked up at Keishin. "I've never seen my parents struggle between their flawless hospitality and kicking someone out of their house so much in my life," you chuckled lightly.

"I'm a bit of a shock." Keishin placed his hand on your lower back and led you toward the couch. "I brought out all the stops in the beginning so they could have the whole night to get used to me."

"How kind of you." You sat down, slightly caught off guard when Keishin sat down right next to you and slung his arm over your shoulders. You were about to ask him what he was doing, but then you remembered that the two of you were supposed to be an actual couple and this is what couples did.

As soon as you felt his touch on you, however, your mind flashed back to that night in the park a few weeks ago. Since then, neither one of you had spoken about what had happened on that bench; a wordless agreement between the two of you that you would just move on and pretend it didn't happen.

But as much as you pretended to forget, you never actually could. The feeling of Keishin's hands on your sides and his warm breath on your lips kept you up at night. As much as you tried not to think of him like that, you just couldn't help yourself.

"You seem really nervous," Keishin leaned closer to you a whispered. "You okay?"

Snapping out of your thoughts, you nodded quickly. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just trying not to freak out is all."

"Hey." Keishin tilted your head toward him so he could look you in your eyes. "You're their daughter. No matter what happens, they will always love you. Remember that."

You flashed a smile. Somehow, Keishin knew exactly what to say to help you relax. "Yeah . . . thanks."

Just then, your father returned with two glasses of water in hand. Handing one each to you and Keishin, you didn't miss the way his gaze settled on the sight of Keishin's arm around you.

"Thank you." Keishin grabbed his glass right away and took a sip. You, on the other hand, let your glass sit on the coaster on the table. Despite how dry your mouth was, you didn't trust your shaky hands to pick up the glass.

"Dinner should be ready soon," your father said as he sat down in his armchair across from you and Keishin. "So, Keishin, tell me about yourself. What do you do for a living?"

"Well, currently, I spend most of my time coaching the boys' volleyball team at Karasuno high school," Keishin answered, his eyes lighting up a little when he spoke about the team he coached; you could tell he really enjoyed it. "And my family owns Sakanoshita Market and I work there sometimes."

"Sakanoshita Market," your father repeated. "That sounds familiar."

You rolled your eyes, not surprised in the slightest that your father had forgotten the name of the place you had been working at for the past few months. "That's where I work, Dad," you told him. "That's how Keishin and I met."

"I see." Your father eyed Keishin and you were surprised that Keishin didn't shrink under the cold, hard gaze like you usually did. "So do you go after all the young women who work at your family store or just my daughter?"

"Dad!" you gasped, unsure whether to tell him off or apologize to Keishin on behalf of your father.

"It's okay," Keishin told you calmly before answering your father's question. "Actually, the store hasn't seen a new employee in years. For the longest time, it was just my mother and me. We are both very grateful for all the hard work Y/N puts in to help us with the store. She is a wonderful employee."

You couldn't help the blush that tinted your cheeks at the compliment. "Thanks."

"No need to thank me. It's the truth," Keishin said before leaning in and pressing a quick kiss to your lips. "And good thing you took the job too, or else we would have never met."

Keishin then shot a sparkling grin your father's way, completely blinding him and distracting him from the shocked expression on your face. You knew you told Keishin to act like the two of you were really a couple, but you never expected him to play the part so thoroughly.

Your father opened his mouth to no doubt interrogate Keishin some more, but before he could, your mother began setting the table and announced that dinner was ready.

Moving over to the table, you took a seat across from Keishin while your parents sat at the ends of the table. As your mother brought the dishes of food over, you took the chance to drink some water and parch your dry throat.

The thought of having to keep this awkward conversation up gave you a headache, but thankfully, Keishin seemed to be handling everything quite well. Just as you had expected, he took everything with a grain of salt and refused to let your parents get under his skin.

You wished you were able to do that.

After the four of you bowed your heads and said thank you for the food, you dug in. At first, everyone was too busy eating to say anything. Somehow, the silence was worse than when your dad had been firing off questions rapid fire.

"This is delicious," Keishin was the first to speak. "Thank you again for inviting me for dinner."

"Yes, o-of course," your mother wavered a little but somehow managed to voice her fake pleasure nonetheless. "Y/N has never dated anyone before so we were curious as to what kind of . . . person . . . had caught her eye."

Keishin nodded, letting the not-so-subtle rude comment roll right off his back. "Well, here I am."

"Yes, here you are indeed," your father muttered under his breath. Thankfully, it didn't seem as though Keishin had heard it, but you certainly had. "So, you said you coach high school volleyball. Is this a long-term thing or?"

Keishin thought for a moment before shrugging. "I'm not sure, honestly. I do enjoy it but I've never given much thought as to if I want to do it long-term. I started coaching because of special circumstances and just haven't stopped yet."

"Well, plenty of people coach and teach," your mother said. "You seem to enjoy working with kids, so have you ever considered becoming a teacher?"

"That doesn't sound like the worst job, but that would require me to have a teaching degree, which I don't have," Keishin responded.

"What degree did you get in university?"

Keishin chuckled. "I didn't go to university."

Oh God. Your jaw dropped and you wished that a black hole could just open up underneath you and suck you in. Out of all the things your parents hated most, people who didn't go to university were at the top of the list. They always told you that 'people who didn't go to university had no interest in investing in their future.'

Hence why they always pushed so hard for you to go the university they wanted so you could study what they thought would be best for you.

You watched your mother's face go red as she reached for her glass of wine a take a particularly large sip. "Community college, then?" she squeaked out.

"Nope, afraid not," Keishin answered, completely unashamed and even proud. "I started working for the family store right after high school."

The looks on your parents' faces that they didn't even try to hide filled you with a deep sense of shame. You didn't know how they could be so blatantly rude to someone they barely knew . . . well, actually, you did know, and that was the worst part. As much as you wished you could deny it, you had thought the same things about Keishin when you had first met him.

Hanging your head in shame, you let the suffocating silence of the dining room take over.

Feeling something brush against your leg, you looked up to see Keishin smiling at you from across the table. 'It's okay' he mouthed to you. You thought back to the time Keishin had told you he was a big boy who could take a little verbal ribbing and exhaled through your nose sharply, your mood lifting ever-so-slightly.

Keishin brushed his foot against your leg a few more times to remind you that you weren't alone at this dinner before he attempted to restart the conversation. "So what do you two do for a living?" he asked, looking to your parents.

"We are both lawyers," your father said.

You nodded and sighed. "Hence why they want me to go to law school."

"Oh, honestly, Y/N, you say that like paying for you to go to law school is abuse." Your mother shook her head disapprovingly. "Do you know how many children would kill for the opportunities you have been given and yet you want to throw them away just like that? You should be grateful."

You were about to retort but stopped yourself before you did, knowing that it would only serve to start the same argument that you had lost over and over again. No matter what you said on the matter, your parents refused to try and see things from your perspective.

It never once occurred to them that you might actually not want to be a lawyer.

"Tell me, Keishin, if you had a child who you could pay for to go to law school and they told you they wanted to pursue their dream of playing soccer, what would you do?" Your father turned to Keishin, suddenly interested in what he had to say on the issue.

"Dad, let's not talk about that now," you spoke softly, hoping to get him to change the subject.

"No, no, let's hear what Keishin has to say." Your father insisted.

Keishin thought for a moment before answering. "Well, I think I would just want my child to be happy," he said, his eyes leaving your father to look at you. "I made the mistake of not following my dreams after high school and I regret it every day, so I would tell my child to follow their dreams and try my hardest to be there to support them."

You smiled wide, surprised by how emotional Keishin's words made you feel. For a moment, it was just you and him, and he was saying everything you had ever wanted to hear. All you ever wanted for was someone to be in your corner . . . someone to support you whether your choice was a mistake or not.

"Congratulations, Y/N, you've found a dreamer just like yourself," your father scoffed, breaking you out of your happy trance. "Too bad dreams don't pay the bills."

"Well, when your future is working at a family-run corner store, dreams are all you have," your mother cackled, not even trying to be quiet about it.

Your father laughed as well. "Too true, honey."

"Mom!" you shouted at her, your anger taking over before you even had the chance to think about your actions.

"It's okay," Keishin told you again, reaching across the table for your hand.

You shook your head and tugged your hand out of his reach. "No, it's not okay!" You rose to your feet, finally having had enough. "This dinner was a terrible idea. I cannot believe you!"

"If you've finally come to your senses, darling, we can send Keishin on his way and-" your mother reached for you as well but you shrugged her off.

"I'm not talking about Keishin! I'm talking about the two of you!" You slammed your hands down onto the table, shaking the dishes of food. "The whole night you have been making offhanded remarks and rude comments about Keishin while he has been nothing but the perfect guest. I'm sorry, Keishin, but I can't sit here and let you take their abuse anymore. I've dealt with it my whole life and I won't let them do the same thing to you. You don't deserve that."

"Y/N, you're being a bit dramatic, don't you think?" your father asked, sipping his wine as if nothing was happening, which only made you angrier.

"No, father, I don't think so," you snapped back. "I think that you and Mom are being horrible and I cannot believe that this is how you're acting when meeting someone for the first time. What makes you think that you have the right to treat someone so poorly just because they don't live the same life or have the same ideals as you? You think you know what is best for me but you don't even know me, so how could you?! I would rather work at the corner store for the rest of my life if it meant being genuinely happy over being a snobby, emotionless lawyer any day."

While you vented in front of your parents, Keishin just stared at you wide-eyed, completely floored by how quickly your demeanor had changed from shy and uncomfortable to enraged and animated in mere seconds. The last time he had seen you like this was when you were going off on him and he was grateful your rage wasn't directed at him this time.

Aside from relieved, Keishin felt proud; proud of you for standing your ground.

An embarrassed look flashed across your mother's face. "Y/N, please-"

"No, just don't," you lowered your voice and took a few deep breaths. "I can't do this anymore. I can't keep pretending that I'm going to put up with your plans for me just so I can have a roof over my head. Mom, Dad, I'm not going to law school. I'm not letting you dictate my life anymore. I'm done."

Stepping away from the table, completely emotionally drained, you looked over your shoulder at Keishin. "Come on, let's go." You waved for him to follow.

Without a word, Keishin stood from the table and followed you to the front door where the two of you grabbed your jackets and got ready to leave.

"If you walk out that door, don't bother coming back!" You heard your father call after you as you left the house, but his threat didn't phase you in the least. If anything, never having to return to that house sounded like bliss right then.

Wrapping your jacket tight around your body to fight the cool evening wind, you sighed. "I'm sorry about that," you told Keishin as he walked silently beside you. "I should never have dragged you into my mess. You don't deserve to be treated the way my parents treated you."

"You don't need to apologize." He wrapped his arm around you once more and held you close, both to comfort you and to keep you warm. "I'm just worried about you. Are you okay?"

You felt tears begin to well in your eyes and frantically wiped them away. "I . . . I don't know," you answered truthfully. "I suppose I should just worry about one thing at a time, and since I've apparently got nowhere to spend the night now . . ."

"You'll spend the night at my place," Keishin stated plainly, not even bothering to ask if you wanted to or not. It was more like an order, but right then, you had nothing against him making decisions for you. As long as the choices weren't made by your parents, you didn't care who they came from.

"Okay," you exhaled. "Thank you."

As the two of you walked through the quiet night in the direction of the store, Keishin pulled a cigarette out of his pocket and lit it. Without thinking, you wrapped your arm around his waist and leaned into him, the warmth he radiated bringing you some semblance of peace.

"I'm sorry tonight went so shit," Keishin spoke as he exhaled, smoke spilling from his lips.

"It's not your fault," you told him. "In fact . . . I don't think tonight could have gone any better. In the end, this is how it was always going to turn out. It's better I realize that sooner rather than later."

Keishin stopped and looked down at you. "That's not-"

"It's okay," you said those two magic words this time. "You remember when you told me that no matter what happened they would always love me because I'm their daughter?"

Keishin nodded.

"I wish you could have been right."

[silverrstarrr]

extra hand

Update note: Happy spring break loves! Here's a smut I never finished but I still wanted to post it. I'll be taking break from writing eren. I recently started simping for geto Suguru from jjk so😩

Okay, so this is my first smut. I'm just experimenting and playing around with things. I WOULD LOVE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM, but don't bash me bc I'm a little sensitive and then go off 🥲. Song? Um, don't get mad at me but killshot by Magdalena b. slowed n reverb and no guidance remix, slowed n reverb.😕🦴

Pairings: erenxf!reader, smut!

Warnings: fingering, swearing, idk??

"Fuck!"

You tossed your phone onto the nearby bed in the spawn of annoyance, watching the mobile device bounce up a few times, then settling down into the soft comforter. Why were you irritated? It was because he hasn't texted. Eren Yeager haven't texted you back.

Your relationship with eren was a toxic one. You weren't the type to romanticize or fetishize "toxicness" but here you are, putting yourself in one.

Eren was your boyfriend, well, ex-boyfriend? The both of you used to talk, met at a dumb frat boy party. This should have raised red flags immediately but you guessed the alcohol was to blame for it.

You guys had a small heated makeout session in one of the corners, away from the crowd. Sadly your friend was vomiting all over the place and had to take your leave.

Slowly you started seeing each other on campus and exchanged numbers. He'd always flirt with you, crack small jokes and was a good listener.

Sometimes he made small gestures and teasing comments that made the tension between you two, very heavy.

You started talking to him more than usual. you were sure eren only gave you his number to call you anytime he was in the mood, which happened often. It was obvious he's been with other women before cause, phew, he knew how to put it down.

Despite being fuck buddies, he was always down to chat and talk about things. You adored everything about him. How unkempt his hair was, the way he'll always ask how you were feeling and was willing to help you–his beautiful jade eyes.

Anytime you were upset with him, he always knew how to catch your attention again. From all this, you caught feelings. Real bad. But eren didn't feel the same, well so you thought.

Eren was walking around campus with another girl, arm slung around her shoulder, him whispering sweet nothings in her ears as you watched her face get red and started laughing. He even took you on small dates to restaurants and hanged out at his dorm.

You stood there dumbfounded. He played you. You guys were never a thing, you didn't understand why you thought you'll be different, he's a fuck boy after all.

He hit you up later that night, wanting to have a sesh in his car. Your emotions were spilled all over the place. you messaged him back questioning about the girl he was with. You sounded so desperate and you hated it.

From the way you were texting he knew you've caught feelings and automatically cut you off.

You were shocked, you hoped for him to just clear things up and tell you those overly used line: "she doesn't mean anything". You know, what most guys tell their girlfriends after being caught cheating.

But that was 4 months ago. He recently got in touch with you two week ago. How dare he just try to slide back into your life as if nothing happened? you were beyond pissed but you still messaged him back anyways. What the fuck? You're just going to get hurt all over again. You guys were chatting for a good week and decided to meet at his dorm.

"Hey y/n, long time no see, huh." He said

you clicked your tongue. "So you just ghost girls out of nowhere and hit them back up whenever you feel like it?" you were absolutely irritated, you wanted to punch his stupid face.

Eren rolled his eyes and let out a tiresome sigh. "It's whatever, get over it. I messaged you back, correct? You should be happy."

He was high. You could already tell by the way he smelled and the reason why he texted you out of the blue.

"Fuck you, Eren." You stormed out of there with your blood rushing. You were so angry but wanted to cry so much. "Whatever"? Was he serious?

You immediately called an uber and went home.

You rented out an apartment with one of your friends from high school. They were out most of the time so you never really saw them.

Automatically, eren was blowing up your phone with text messages. You didn't answer them, and kept him on delivered.

Which didn't last long because early on, on Tuesday, you messaged him back.

He was obviously upset you left him up and dry for a week but got over it.

Now, you're here. Waiting for his reply once again, your last text message was three days ago. It was currently Saturday night, 6:48 pm.

He hasn't responded since Wednesday. Was he going to ghost you again? Maybe he found another girl to mess with? bzzt bzzt You instantly whipped your head back, and stared at your phone's now lightened screen. You had a notification,

From eren.

Unlocking your phone, you checked what he sent.

"Can you come over?"

"pls?"

You read, then reread, then read again. He wanted you to come over? he's doing it again. He's fucking doing it again. He responds three nights later, what the fuck.

You didn't respond at first. Just staring at the open conversations.

You guessed eren saw that you read his text and three dots appeared on the lower left, he was typing.

"y/n, I know I fucked up but please can you respond at least?"

Your thumbs swiped against the keyboard.

"say what? what do I owe you a response for?" You sat down on your bed as the blue bubble sent.

"my phone got messed up, I dropped in it in the rain on my way back from practice. It cracked really bad"

You studied the screen not knowing what to say. You couldn't tell if he was lying or if it was true. But it did rain on Tuesday, so his story wasn't completely untruthful.

"I'll be over in 10"

That's it, you gave in to him. You're just setting yourself up again for another heartbreak.

You decided to prepare yourself. This was going to be a long night

—

You had your jacket on as you stepped out the door. It was still winter, luckily the piled up snow died down.

You quickly jogged to your uber and entered inside. the driver took off shortly after you came in.

The drive was pretty short, he was only ten minutes away. you wished it was longer, so you could lecture yourself for the decision you made.

You hoped out the car and went inside the boys dormitory. His dorm was on the left wing, so you proceed towards that direction.

Eren shared a dorm with Armin, you hoped he was there just in case a heated argument happened because you had a feelings one would come.

Arriving at the hall where all the rooms were at, you walked down the hall checking the numbers, so you'll know which one was his.

You despise that you remembered it as you stood in front of his door.

You pulled out your phone to shoot him a quick "here" to notify your arrival.

Not too long after, a tall brunette opened the door, he immediately grabbed your wrist and pulled you inside.

The room was dim and dark, other than the dark purple LD lights.

You felt your back make contact with the door behind you, he snaked his free hand around your waist. He pressed his lips against yours, you could feel his impatience as he tilted his head slightly to the side to deepen the kiss.

He pulled away ever so slight and licked the bottom of your lip asking for entrance, so intoxicated by his lust you simply obeyed and parted your mouth slightly. His warm tongue slipping in exploring every inch of your mouth.

You ran your other hand over his black t-shirt trailing up to his neck soon afterwards interlocking your fingers in his brown locks. Although the kiss felt rushed it still made you melt, and gave a small throb down in your area. You slightly tugged on his hair earning you a groan into the heated kiss.

The butterfly’s in your stomach were going on a rampage and your heart was beating out of your chest. He slightly pulled away from the kiss, a string of saliva connecting your mouths together.

"...eren," you moaned slightly.

He was looking down at you, you were so stunning beneath him—face already flustered from one kiss. he wanted to here his name once more.

traveling down to your neck, he started showering it with wet kisses, and continued traveling down. He reached your collarbone and gave it a small bite, as the skin turned red, your grip in hair grew tighter. You were a mess, already ready feeling slick in between your legs as you rubbed them together, desperate for any sort of friction.

eren slid his hand upwards from your waist to your shirt, his soft hands grazed your bare skin—rubbing slowly, sending shivers down your spine.

you released another breathy moan as he continued at your neck. Hearing you moan was a blessing to him, he couldn't stop thinking about you ever since your last encounter.

He wanted to defile you, run his hands all over your body, touching placing only he knew he had access to—having your fingers intertwined in his long locks as he heard dumb founded mewls, begging him to stop teasing and give you what you wanted.

He pulled himself away from your neck, leaving you stunned at his sudden stop.

" why'd you st-" you were cut off by the jerk at your arm once again. He was taking you to his room as you trailed behind him, not saying a word.

Reaching his room, he pulled you inside, his lips crashed against yours once more, he kicked the door with his foot and closed it, locking the knob.

Your mind was fuzzy, you felt so heated and felt your pussy clench against nothing. You wanted him so bad, his impatience was rubbing off of you. But you couldn't bring yourself to tear away from his mouth, his lips felt so soft against your own. It made you feel wanted by him again, as if he never ghosted you and needed you this whole time.

Your back touched the soft mattress of his bed as he climbed on top of you, you were going haywire. you gave in to him with no obligation whatsoever and was dominanted in response. you can't say you didn't expect this from the moment he decided to text you.

His hands slithered up your shirt, pushing it up, grabing a hold of your breast through the bra. you smiled at his eagerness to touch you, how long has he been like this? using your elbows to support you, you raised your upper back from the bed as his other hand came around and unhooked your bra.

The butterflies in your stomach wouldn't stop, the warmth from his body felt attonishing against your own. sloppy kisses smothered across your lips, each break releasing a moan from one another, hearing throughout the room.

You laid back down as his hand large hands began fondling with your breast, your nipples were already hard from all the foreplay.

Eren hips started to grind against your pelvis,

"Fuck..." he moaned out, his face was already red, blushing like a dumb teenage virgin.

You break the kiss and sat up to remove your shirt, eren gave you space to do so–moving back a little. You tossed it on the floor, on the otherside of the bed, along with your bra, which was sitting next to you since eren took it off. You knocked you shoes off as well.

You immediately leaned towards eren wrapping your arms around his neck, lips already on his own, making him fall towards your direction—giving you a chance to wrap your legs around his waist. Your back made contact with the mattress once again and you moved your hips, grinding your heated core against his crotch.

"Dammit y/n...fuck, I can't stand this...when you do this to me."

Eren followed the same action as you. Releasing small moans and you both continued to dry hump one another.

You tugged at his shirt, wanting him to take it off. You didn't like it when you were the only bare and he knew this, a small chuckled erupted from his throat as he got on his knees–hands grasping the hem of the shirt, tugging it over his head.

You laid there in awe, he still kept his shape after all these months. You guessed those practices were really paying off. Your hand trailed up his torso, feeling his sculpture chest beneath your palm. His skin was so soft, you drifted your hand back down, passing over his abs.

"You like what you see?" he said smirking down at you.

"Shut up." you spat out.

Eren moved back down to your chest and took a hold of your breast, bringing his mouth to your nipple–while his other hand supported his weight. He gave it a long lick eyes flickering up at you, checking your reaction. His mouth was warm, his heavy breath touching your skin while he decided to play with your nipple.

You released small grunts as his red tongue swirled around your perked bud, closing his mouth then releasing it—leaving kisses and bite marks all around your breast. You were prepared for all the purplish marks you'll in the morning, you prayed you had your ointment at home.

Using his other hand, he slid his hand down your stomach, earning another moan from you. His touch felt so ethereal, this was what your body was craving for all these months.

His hand slid past your joggings, making contact with your cotton underwear. He dipped his fingers between your lips, gathering the slick that was leaking from your heat. His fingers brushed against your clit, as you moaned his name,

"eren—hnng, stop teasing—"

His only response was a smirk as he released his lips from your nipple with a wet pop sound.

"look how wet you are for me, hm? what happened to that attitude that you're so keen of?" his index finger continued to rub against your entrance, your clit getting some friction in the process. His middle finger plunge into your hole, sliding is easily from the lubrication of your wetness as he began pumping his finger in a steady motion, each stroke going deeper and deeper, stretching you out.

"nnghh—fuck eren..." your voice pitched at a higher tone for a moment.

you haven't felt like this is a while, his long digit fitted perfectly into your hole.

"hm? look how tight you pussy has gotten without me, can't wait to feel you around me."

Eren pulled his finger out, using his index to spread open your lips, then gathered some more slick as both fingers went inside.

He was prepping you up for his length, since you haven't had sex in a while. His fingers started to scissor you, both spreading out in your core—stretching you out even more.

Your hand immediately went for his hair and tugged at it with a grunt, eren moaned at your aggressiveness with his brunette locks.

"s-stop...mfhh." another soft mewl escaped your lips.

Eren pulled out his fingers and rested them in your panties.

"Stop?" He knew what you meant, he always does. his eyebrow turned to an arch, waiting an answer.

"m'didn't mean for you...to," you couldn't form a sentence, your mind was so hazy from the heated atmosphere between you two. you wanted his touch again, you hated the feeling of you clenching around nothing.

eren gave your chest a few pecks, then one at your neck close to your jaw.

"use your words, y/n." man, he was enjoying this too well. He missed this part of you so bad, having you a complete mess under his touch.

"I want you inside of me." The last word was spoken in a lower tone, you were embarrassed. Never knew you'll hear those words come from your mouth again.

"Good girl." He bought his fingers up to his mouth as he sucked on them, swirlying his pink tongue around his digits while directly making eye contact with you. Releasing them with another wet pop, he start to work on his joggers.

Moving off of you, he swing his legs to the edge of bed, pullng down his gray sweats as it hits the floor–slides it across the floor. He did the same with his boxers.

You did the same, taking off your bottoms along with your damp panties, placing it over with your other clothing.

erens cock slapped against his abdominal, precum already dripping from the slit of head.

He gave himself a few strokes, groaning loudly as he shifted back to your direction. Settling between your legs, he uses his hand to trace his pink tip between your folds, slipping between your lips constantly—gathering lubrication.

"m'mfgh...stop teasing eren," your chest was heavy with anticipation, you wanted him inside you so bad. His free rest on your bended knee, his fingers drawing circles.

"shhh, y/n—I know." He coos.

Finally, he dipped his cock into your seeping hole as your velvety walls draw him in–not giving him a chance to adjust from tight you were. You both moan in unison, feeling contentment, getting what you guys wanted you at last.

" hnng, you're so tight...shit," erens eye closed shut while he pushed the rest of his length inside you. Even after stretching you out with his fingers, you were still tight and eren enjoyed every second of it.

Once he was in all the way, his cock was a snug fit—he waited for you to adjust so he could move.

Your chest now heaving up and down, you give a little nod—signaling it was okay to move. Drawing his hips back, he slid out of your core completely and immediately thrusted forward entering back to your wet core.

Eren began thrusting into you at a steady pace as his both of his hands grabbed your legs, resting them behind your knee.

You knew it'll be a long night.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

update note: HAHAHA IM BACK GUYS MORE FANFICS. I'm finally on spring break 😭

[leeknowsredeyeliner]

what he truly meant - lee minho

lee minho x fem reader

summary: you provoke your best friend into confessing his feelings for you

genre: best friends to lovers, very very slight angst

warning: mention of fake gagging once

word count: 2.1k+

navigation.

"Are you done yet? I'm so fucking hungry I could probably eat those papers," the boy seated across from you complains.

"These papers are part of my project so I'd appreciate if you didn't munch on them. Why didn't you eat before we came here?" You question the starved boy while setting the papers he's been eyeing down for the past five minutes as far away as possible from him.

"I didn't think we'd take," he briefly checks his phone and his eyes widen. Meanwhile, yours widen for a different reason. One of the librarians has been watching you two like a hawk after being given two warnings to quiet down. "Dude! It's been almost three hours since we've been here. I haven't spoken above 20 decibels for that long?!"

"Quit over-exaggerating, Minho. And seriously, shush, you're so close to getting us kicked out with your loud ass." You start on your last section of questions for English Lit with thoughts of school, food, Minho's annoying ass voice, and the librarian that hasn't left the aisle from across your table all embedded in your brain.

There's a presence next to you, followed with a high-pitched voice, "I'm hungryy! Y/n, feed me. Treat me to some food." Minho's head was now resting on your shoulder as he threw a fit, hearing him repeatedly stomp his feet.

"And I'm broke but you don't see me begging people for money," you gently pat his face before finishing your assignment 'cause Minho isn't the only person with a rumbling stomach. He gets comfy on your shoulder like it's his pillow, feeling his breath on your face. You move your head to the side to be met with face just centimeters away from yours. Being so close, you grow curious of what his facial features are like from such a distance. Your eyes drop to his lips first and you feel your breath get caught in your throat to find they're closer than you imagined.

"You look like a baby," you chuckle as you poke his cheek.

The vibrations of his chuckle run through your entire body, "Yeah, but I'm your baby." You fake gag at his sudden softness but inside, your heart races a bit.

[6:03pm]

Aaand done!

"Let's go, babe," you call him by a meaningless nickname as you close your laptop and gather your belongings. You're unsure of the amount of time it took to finish and turn in your document but it seemed to have been a short while; hence the sleeping boy on your left using his backpack as a pillow.

You let the boy sleep a while longer as you put everything away your bag. After setting your backpack on the table, you look over at Minho for the fifth time in the past two minutes. To say your best friend is pretty is an understatement. He is the definition of beauty. The sharp jawline, his big eyes that could either look super soft or come off as fierce and daunting, his sharp nose with the cute mole above his right nostril, his eyebrows that furrow in his sleep. What's even more alluring are his pink lips. The way the corner of his lips curve into a smile when he's with his cats or when he calls you when with his family. The way his lips naturally part when he sleeps.

Yeah, you're whipped. Maybe a bit too whipped for your best friend.

A sound of falling books echoing throughout the library wakes Minho up and you immediately hop out of your chair. The librarian with the hawk-like eyes from earlier was long gone but you didn't seem to notice till now.

"Oh, you're done? Why didn't you tell me?" He throws yours and his bag over his shoulders then reaches for your hand. "Let's go to that pastry place down the street."

The run down to the street felt like two seconds, breezing through the traffic of pedestrians hand in hand. As the sidewalk grew busier, Minho kept you in front of him and used you as a shield, pushing you through the herd of people. Although being treated as his literal body guard, you remained trapped in his embrace, still protecting you from the swarm of bustlers.

As soon as you arrive, you and Minho are greeted by an empty cafe. One table occupied by employees who seemed to be on break.

"Jisung!" The male beside you exclaims before pulling you by the arm towards the front counter. From your knowledge, Jisung is Minho's family friend and best friend until you came along his freshman year of college.

"Sup, man. Long time no see," he flashes a cheeky smile then looks over at you, his smile melting into a smirk. "This your girlfriend?"

"Y/n?" Your best friend looks over at you and takes a good look at your face, absorbing every single feature. "Nah," he laughs it off.

I wish I was.

"Makes sense, she's too pretty for you," a wink flying your way. You blush at his words — more like the gesture — and Minho takes notice of your red face.

"Oh, thank-"

"Come on, man," the older one cuts you off and bumps your hip in a friendly manner. "Just 'cause I haven't claimed her yet doesn't mean you can hit on her." He ruffles your hair then rests his arm over your shoulder, immediately pulling you into his side as a habit. You're a bit out of it after hearing what Minho, your crush, had just confessed to Jisung as he stood beside you.

'Just 'cause I haven't claimed her yet doesn't mean you can hit on her.'

Yet. The word 'yet'. Huh.

You're in disbelief at his word choice. The fact that such a sentence even left his mouth is what makes you think to yourself.

You repeat those words in your head like a broken record. 'Just 'cause I haven't claimed her yet doesn't mean you can hit on her.' It makes you feel so fluffy inside and not as hopeless as you were a minute ago.

"Shit, my bad. Better get to that then. Anyways, what can I get y'all today?" The male on the opposite side of the counter changes the topic.

"What do you want, hm?" Minho looks over at you and catches you staring at him. He lets out a soft chuckle and shakes you a bit to get you out of your head but how did he expect you to be completely unfazed after basically admitting he planned to ask you out.

"Uh, just a slice of a chocolate cake roll and a mango smoothie would be good."

"And I'll get what she's having too." Jisung completes your order and after Minho pays, the two of you have a seat on one of the couches. You get comfy, awaiting the food and Minho does the same by scrolling through his phone.

"So, what was that? You saying you haven't claimed me yet," you briefly elaborate. Of course, you're not afraid to bring it up. Especially when you're so curious about the meaning behind it. You don't want to misinterpret anything by reading too much into his words.

It's such a simple sentence but with Minho, it somehow turns complicated. He can say one thing but means the complete opposite or didn't mean it at all.

"I didn't think you'd want Jisung to flirt with you," he plainly stated. You often backed each other up around strangers or in special situations but to have such a lie leave his mouth to a friend didn't seem right to you.

"Ah, and that's all that was?" He nods his head, not bothering to look up from his phone. If you had only heard his voice, you would’ve believed him but his actions give it away. Not many people know about Minho's habits but luckily for you, you do. One of them being lack of eye contact and posing to be interested in something other than the conversation.

A few moments go by as you watch people walk down the street and Jisung finally arrives with your tray of food and drinks. "Two orders of chocolate cake rolls and two orders of mango smoothies. Is there anything else you need?"

"Nope-"

"Actually, yeah," you quickly peek at Minho who's putting his phone away in his pocket. "Jisung, are you free tomorrow?"

"I have a shift but that ends at 4. Why? What's up?" You feel Minho shift in his spot. He isn't stupid, he knows you just as well as you know him to figure out you were doing this on purpose. The reason why is unknown to him. Now, it's just a matter of playing the waiting game.

"Great. How about dinner at 6?" You flash a bright smile.

Jisung glances over at his friend before responding, "Uh, I don't think Minho would like that idea."

"It doesn't matter what he thinks, he's just my best friend. And he never tells me what to do."

"Okay then," Jisung easily gives in. You exchange phone numbers and he goes back to the counter, attending to the customers that have entered since giving you and Minho your food.

You take a sip of your smoothie, pretending to mind your own business but inside, you're dying to hear even a peep from your best friend. Yeah, Jisung's attractive and seems like a great guy but your feelings for Minho will always triumph over everything else.

"This smoo-"

As if he were triggered by your voice, Minho cuts you off, "What was that for?"

"What? Asking Jisung on a date or exchanging phone numbers with him?" You wait for a response but only receive an eyebrow raise. But that eyebrow raise definitely said, 'yes, what else would i be talking about?'

"Jisung's attractive and if I'm not mistaken, he seems to be interested in me. Might as well take a chance with him."

"Wow," he mutters. He seems taken aback and possibly a bit betrayed.

"Wow, what?" You awkwardly chuckle, still waiting for what you want to hear: Possibly bring up what he truly meant at the register earlier or telling you to cut the bullshit with Jisung.

"So you're going to entertain the guy that said one nice thing about you," anger rising in his voice with hurt written on his face. "Are you just going to brush off what I said about you in front of him?" There it is. He brought it up.

"But you told me it was nothing. You thought I didn't want Jisung to flirt with me so you backed me up, right? Like we always do." You lean back on the couch with your smoothie in hand.

"Oh, please. You know me better than anyone in this world, maybe even better than I know myself. You know exactly what I was meant when we were talking to Jisung." He's definitely ticked off, there’s no doubt about that.

"Come on, Minho, I'm not a mind reader. As much as that'd be a great superpower, I don't know what goes on in that little brain of yours," you taunt him some more.

"Stop playing dumb, Y/n," he runs his hand through his hair in annoyance.

"Minho, seriously," you look him in eyes with a seriousness written all over your face. As much as you love provoking him, you understand and respect his limits, never overstepping. "Just tell me what you were thinking instead of getting mad with me, hm?" Your hand reaches over to fix his hair but he grips your wrist before you could do so.

"Um, ow," you say glancing down at the hand on your wrist. You had the sudden urge to yell at him to let go but when you lift your gaze you're met with a pissed off Minho.

Your lips press together as you observe the look he's giving you. His eyebrows are furrowed with lips curved in a slight frown as he's lightly biting his bottom lip. He takes the smoothie out of your grasp to replaces it with his hand. Your eyes grow large in an affectionate way rather than shy or surprised at the touch.

Resting your intertwined hands in his lap, he slowly moves in then crashes his lips on yours and you don't waste a second before kissing back. The harshness fading away once you reciprocate the kiss.

Every bone and muscle in your body relaxes as you forget about your surroundings to savor the moment. To savor the feeling of Minho's lips on yours. To savor the feeling of Minho so close to you.

The past two years, you’ve built a tight bond and put down your walls for each other. Even after that, this moment is the closest you've emotionally felt to him. From a simple kiss, you've given your everything to him, as if you've fully opened up to him.

Although the kiss was short, there was so much said, so many feelings out in the open now. Every unspoken word, every unspoken feeling, you now know. You completely understand each other. Now you're smiling like idiots, foreheads pressed together.

"You know," you whisper. "You still never said out loud what you truly meant."

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[qyllenhaal]

God’s Face in the Fire || Part 2

Dark!Lee Bodecker x Dark!Reader

Summary: A wife who would do anything to give her husband the world, even if it means getting herself involved with his trouble.

Word Count: 10.3k

Chapter warnings: dark themes!!! contains mentions of murder, non-graphic death scenes, smut (loss of virginity in a flashback scene), manipulation, brief mention of sexual assaults, misogyny, uncomfortable situations. Please heed the warnings!!! 18+ only

A/N: It's been forever since I posted. The last two weeks have left me discombobulated that it was hard to find time to sit down to write and edit this, but I'm glad I got to it! The next part is going to be the last part but I have plans to do one-shots for this universe. I'm going to be posting a Senator!Chris fic tomorrow so stay tuned for that.

Enjoy!

"You remember when I took you out for milkshakes and you spilled yours all over me? You were wearing that exact same color," Lee said pointing at the dress she was pressing.

"All those years ago, and you still remember that?" Y/n wanted to drown in this tender moment she's having with her husband. Hearing him laugh, his stomach shifting, and his eyes wrinkling.

"How could I? Watching you get all flustered and cute really got me goin’. It's when I knew I was gonna marry ya."

The days have been incredibly warm and beautiful since Y/n had done what she did. It was cruel irony that she was enjoying another day while someone’s body was rotting. The softer moments of life were few and far between these days, but right now she’s offered her a wonderful distraction.

She had taken on more tasks than usual to distract herself from the intrusive thoughts she had. She even accepted a last minute invite to help put on an event at the local rental hall with some of the other mothers in town. It gave her an excuse to look nice and show herself off to anyone who had some doubts about Lee. Things were looking good for him, but there was always something to do to further rehabilitate his image. She always looked her best as the sheriff's wife. Keeping up the appearances exhausted her since they have become more frequent for her. However if she wanted the people to fawn over her lovely family, she had to show up. An arts and crafts event for the kids is also a good chance to get their daughter out of the house.

Teenage Y/n did not see herself becoming a housewife so young. It was unsavory to think about being a homemaker for one of the boys’ at school. She surmised that she would’ve stuck by her original plan if she had not been so lonely. All of Y/n's friends left within a year of graduating high school. She didn't have that many friends to begin with, but she thought that at least one would always be there for her. Rose went to college, and Barbara found a man to marry and moved to upstate New York. Only one stayed for some time, Judith, but she eventually left after having a shotgun wedding. It was selfish of her to think that someone would stay just because she got rejected from the only college she had applied to. Other people had lives and Y/n was just not at the center of them.

The absence of her friends made her pregnancy more lonely. Her baby shower consisted of her family, Lee’s sister, and his co-workers and their wives. None of the women seemed to be fond of Y/n. It always plagued her mind to know if they thought she was too young and stupid or if it was just something else

She found solace in some of the other mother's in town. When she began showing up around to volunteer at bake sales and food drives she expected them to look at her face and then down at her belly and reject her. She is younger than them and feared they'd find her naïve. She had kept to herself for so long that she thought they'd write her off as the sheriff's meek wife.

Y/n didn't get a chance to mingle with anyone prior to her marriage and Lee made it harder by insisting in little ways that she stay in the house. No one was at fault that Lee wanted to keep her to himself. It was possible he did it out of insecurity, but Y/n now speculates that it was because he didn’t want to hear or even see what he may have been doing.

One of the ladies who Y/n only knew by her dark hair and distinct, pointy nose joked that Lee had, "finally let Rapunzel out of the castle." When the other mothers joined into laughter, she felt small. It was only a harmless joke that was steeped in the truth. It took her persistence to no longer wanting to feel alone while being pregnant to get the women to warm up to her, and the did.

"I remember spilling the milkshake, but I was too embarrassed to remember anything else about that night," she admitted.

Lee remembers that night very well. He wishes that she didn't end the night so quickly because she ruined a pair of trousers that could easily be replaced. He had only bought them to impress her, but it didn't take much to get her to swoon over him. No other man was giving her the time of day.

"We should go out to that diner Friday night. Now that we have someone to watch the little one, we don't have to stop by your parents to drop her off anymore. I can just scoop you up and we can have a night together," Lee pressed himself into Y/n's backside. She giggled when his hands lightly danced against her ticklish sides.

Lee had also been aware of the slim moments of intimacy with his wife. He was serious about this race but he truly underestimated how much time and effort he'd have to put into this. But people really did love the old mayor. The only slight Lee had against him was his old age and how some believed that if he kept going then he might run into some health problems. The rumors about him becoming more and more forgetful were minute compared to the dark gossip swirling about Lee though. Some of the people in town would probably vote for a paper bag before Lee.

His biggest fear is that he loses the election and drives his wife away. He could lose the race, but if his wife somehow slipped away, taking their baby with her, he’d drink himself into a stupor. Lee tried his very best to hide his insecurities from her. When he worried, she worried too and it made it much harder for him to plan his way out of whatever hole he is in when he has a hysterical wife to deal with. That's why he'd rather not tell her anything.

Lee also wasn't the young man in his prime anymore, he believed that his good looks were fading, and he has gained a considerable amount of weight. The fear of Y/n just up and leaving him for someone younger than him and riding off to the city always plagued him. The birth of their daughter should've assuaged him, but his self-doubt always lingered like a cloud that made him stick to his vices.

"I've really missed ya honey...missed this body of yours."

Y/n flinched when his hands ran down the front of her body, over her stomach and then circling up back to her breast. Her body has changed considerably since giving birth and the hormonal imbalance left her feeling tired, sad, and alone. Her mother told her that all she had to do was look at her child and she'd feel better, but every time she looked at her little girl all she did was worry. Was she a good mom? Why was her daughter crying so much without much working? Was Lee staying at work for long hours to avoid the crying and her? Did he still find her attractive?

They’re both too busy thinking Lee's mayoral bid to realize they felt the exact same way as each other. If there was any other time that proved they were an extension of each other, it was now, but they were too blind to see it.

"Lee y-you're going to be late for work," her voice was weakened by his lips now nipping at her neck.

"Don't give a damn," he whispered against her skin, inhaling her familiar scent, "just wanna feel my wife."

Today, Y/n felt herself slipping back into her normal self and normal life. She melted into Lee, hoping that maybe they could have a moment to themselves, but they were interrupted by the phone ringing downstairs. Every early morning and late night phone call had her on edge. They never seemed to be about anything important but it hasn't failed yet to make her stomach churn.

Lee groaned and pulled away from her. She watched him disappear to go answer the phone.

It has been nearly two days and the only thing on her mind is what happened after she left that brothel. The anxiety made her feel sick. Hours later after it happened, around 2 a.m., she woke up and darted to the toilet. Lee kept asking her if she was pregnant as he held her hair back while her face was in the toilet. She dismissed his claims, knowing full and well that she was just sickened by her actions.

Lee had not mentioned a death or anything related to that brothel, so had he even been found? Was his death even reported? The girls who worked for him were probably too worried about their own arrest than the death of their abusive boss.

She wiped the look of worry off of her face when she heard his heavy footsteps coming back up the stairs.

"Who was it?"

"Your brother," his tone held disgust, "invited us to dinner on Sunday. He asked to speak to you but I told him you were still sleep."

"Lee!"

"I don't want to hear it," his voice boomed, much more dominant and rough than hers, "I ain't having dinner with him and I don't want to hear your mouth about it."

Y/n stayed silent and watched him grab the police hat resting on the dresser. She hated for him to leave on such a sour note, but she wouldn't dare say anything in fear she might make things worse.

He started towards the door of their bedroom before turning back to his wife, "Sandy supposed to stop by Saturday. I don't know why, so don't ask, but she claims she's comin'. Who knows if she'll stick to her word."

It’s like Lee did that on purpose, as some sort of sick payback for her brother calling. Y/n was not fond of Sandy and did not like to be around her for more than ten minutes. Sandy was a nice girl, a bit unsavory at times, but her husband Carl was a stain on her life. There was something about him that reminded her of the men her mother had warned her about when she was a young teenager; a man with a slick tongue and a creepy air around him. However, she found Carl much more sinister than that. The look in Carl's eyes when he looked at her and flashed her that unsettling smile was imprinted into her brain. They did not come around much, but when they did it was always a traumatic experience for Y/n.

Lee left the room before Y/n could respond. He knows how Y/n feels, but he can’t bring himself to care right now. She’s not going to protest against it because she knows better than that. He focused on the sound of soft babbling from his daughter as he walked into her room.

"Hey you," she looked up at him with her big eyes and her widening smile that made his heart swell, "you gonna be good for your mama? You've been on a mean streak lately and I'd hate to make good on my threat and put you in baby jail."

His daughter reached up and tried to grab at his face. Lee was clean-shaven now, but for the first few months of his daughter's life he had enough hair on his face for her to grab a hold of. It was funny to see how she still tried to grab at his non-existent hair, pinching his skin in the process.

"Miss the beard little lady? You're just like your mama," he kissed her forehead and felt a deep sense of guilt that he had to leave her to go to work. But everything he did was for her and if he believes that the long hours are going to pay off. All of his work is going to pay off when he wins that race.

-

The dress her daughter wore was blush to complement her mother's golden one. She looked around at every single building and person they passed as if it was her first time seeing it again. Her sense of wonder always made Y/n adore her even more. Y/n wondered what was going on in the little mind of her and what sense she made of the world.

She was never fussy when they were out, which was good for Y/n, but also good for the rehabilitation of Lee's image. He has such a good daughter and pretty wife, he must be doing something right. Every single person who stopped to say hi or coo at how cute her baby was, Y/n wondered if they have ever said something negative about Lee. Y/n never received weird stares or grimaces that would make her paranoid, but she still felt on edge. She always wanted to be on her best behavior, especially when Lee was not with her.

Y/n was forced to be her normal self; cheerful even though her mind was reeling over two nights ago, her sister-in-law, and what the conversation between Lee and her brother this morning may have sounded like. When one of the toddlers thrusted their drawing her face she feigned an excited smile. She hoped the mother's didn't notice her lackluster attitude.

"Y/n , can I speak with you?"

It was Sally's voice that called to her. She looked at the blonde woman with a bit of panic on her face. She thought that she was going to get chewed out by her, especially since she pulled her far away from the other children, and her daughter who was being held by one of the recently graduated girls.

"Is everything alright Sally?"

"I should be asking you that. Why am I hear things about Mrs. Blackwater sayin' she seen your Lee dumpin' bodies in the river behind her house?" At that moment Y/n could not hear her despite her lips still moving. Her blood ran cold at that last name being mentioned. It's been years, close to a decade, since she thought about that old woman, but the mere mention of her name brought Y/n back to a place she didn't want to be.

"I-I...I don't know what she's talking about-"

"My husband and I made a sizable donation to your husband's campaign, and it would be a shame to see him lose," the sugary voice and fake smile on Sally's face made Y/n's stomach ache. She didn't like how some of these women could be so fake because it always made her question if they really liked her or not. But Sally didn't care what Y/n would respond with, all she cared about was her and her husband's reputation, "you're not that much younger than me so you remember them days when that old bitch would be on her porch spewin’ whatever nonsense she could think if at any girl who walked on her sidewalk. No one likes Mrs. Blackwater, but don't think for a second they won't consider what she has to say about that husband of yours. I've heard too many whispers about him and I don't like it. I'll pull my endorsements if you don't fix this shit."

Was murdering one person not enough to save her husband from losing this race? The brothel owner was one person, someone who would not be missed by many people, but could she do something about Mrs. Blackwater?

'That's not right, that's not right.'

No matter how much she tried to shake that evil idea off, it kept creeping into her mind. Murder was the unlikely tool she had in her arsenal all along. It was morally wrong to kill someone, but her victim and the potential one had not been nice people. Mrs. Blackwater's stain on this Earth paled in comparison to Reed's, but that woman made her blood run much colder than the brothel owner.

It was so ironic that Mr. Blackwater was a beloved man in town because no one could stand his wife. They knew not to cross her path and that pies and home cooked meals would not abate her disdain for people. A man who was so kind and friendly was married to the most antisocial person Y/n has ever come across. But he never wasted a moment to sing her her praises. Y/n remembers one of her sons and he was mean just like his mother; a school yard bully that would beat up on anyone he saw as weak and alone. Y/n was lucky that he knew she had an older brother to protect because the Blackwater’s youngest boy never tried anything with her. However, she was not lucky enough to escape the wrath of Mrs. Blackwater. The irony was that she probably would've been better off being a victim of her son. That woman was nasty and wasn't afraid to show it.

"Don't you two get tired of dressing like whores?"

They had to pass the Blackwater house to get to Rose's house. Her house used to be at the end of the street before it got burned down, leaving the Blackwater house the last one on the street. It was nice, and had a big, big porch that Mrs. Blackwater always sat on for most of the day. She didn't stop at calling them just "whores'' and "wenches" either. Y/n never could understand why they always took the brunt of that woman's anger. Rose went home in tears every time she walked by that house. Maybe Y/n's anger is displaced, but she blames Mrs. Blackwater for why Rose was so eager to leave. There wasn't much here, but Rose always promised she'd stay. But ever since they encountered Mrs. Blackwater's misery, Rose had changed.

She could imagine that same venomous voice saying awful things about her husband, "Lee Bodecker put that body in the water. I saw it with my own two eyes!"

The thought of her husband killing someone shouldn't sound so crazy, especially after being able to do it herself. But her Lee can't be a cold-hearted man who slept with whores, murdered people, and ruined people lives. He was so sweet to her, he wasn't always was, but his touch was so soft against her skin, how could he hurt anyone?

Y/n had just turned 19 when she met Lee. He was a deputy, closer to being the sheriff than either of them knew at the time. Their age difference scared her somewhat; she only gave him a chance so she could distract herself from reminding herself that she should be finishing up the last year of being a college freshman. She had the grades and thought her test scores were satisfactory but she got rejected from Indiana University. Her father told her that there is always next year, but her mother told her she should just figure out a new plan.

It was the uncertainty and loneliness that made her get closer to Lee. He was close to his late 20s, unmarried, and he didn't exactly make his loneliness unknown.

He left a sour taste in her mouth in their very first encounter; pulling her over as an excuse to get her number. She gripped the steering wheel to stop them from shaking so much. She only had her license for a few weeks and made sure to be careful in fear of this exact situation happening. His slick talk didn't make her feel that much better either. She was too shaken up to even look at him in the eye or take in any of his features. She just remembered seeing his badge the words DEPUTY SHERIFF etched into it.

Lee let her off, saying she had a "pretty face" and that he hoped to see her around. She didn't think much about their interaction the days after he pulled her over, but she began to see him more than before. Y/n couldn't remember a time she had seen him prior to that one night and found it odd that his face kept reappearing. (He later told her that it was fate, but it was not. Lee purposefully put himself in her orbit. It was not hard to learn what her routine was and when she went out.)

She was weary about his advances, unsure how to react to them because the most experience she's had was with two boys, only one of whom she kissed. Their first date was not by choice either, he just decided to stick by her side while she was at the local dinner by herself.

And he has always stuck by since then, always hovering around her until she realized he was not going to go away and it’d be futile to ignore him. Lee never gave her the chance to make the decision for herself, but his girl was so sweet and she just needed a few cushy words for her to understand that this was where she belonged.

"Do your parents know you're out here meeting me?" It had only been a matter of time before she learned to be very obedient to him; always accepting his plans, even if it meant sneaking out of the house in the midnight hour. The smirk he wore on his face every time he watched her walk up to him left her feeling enchanted.

"Don't talk too loud. If my brother hears you he'll kill you and have my head."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her front to him. Lee groaned at the feel of her breast against his chest. She was so nervous to do anything with him that she only let him kiss her. It was fine for a while, but he had grown tired of waiting. Tired of being teased by her in those soft, pink dresses that would ride up whenever she had to bend over even just a little bit. He couldn't believe how naive she was to believe he was always dropping things like a pencil or his wallet on accident; he just wanted to see her bend over for him just for a chance to peak at what pretty panties she wore that day.

Getting her to come out with him at night was surprising, but the idea of riding in his patrol car was so alluring. The sparkle in her eyes gave him an overwhelming sense of machismo; enough for him to realize he just needs to take what she wants.

The full moon hung in the clear sky and they had a vast, open field in front of them. He took her just to the edge of the county that was secluded and was his favorite spot to go for some quiet (or getting his dick sucked). The moonlight and a few street lights that were actually working were the only light they had.

"You look so pretty today baby," his hand rested on her thigh the whole entire drive but only now did he actually move it to stroke her skin, "you always look so pretty for me. I'm the luckiest man in town."

Y/n giggled and her face felt like it was burning up. No one had taken the time to compliment her sweetly, and that was obvious to Lee. He cradled her face in the palm of his hand and watched her turn into putty. His hand inches closer to her heat causing her to jump like his hand was made of actual fire.

"Relax baby...just relax for me," Lee planted his face in her neck and nipped at it. His lips tickled the skin on her neck and she did her best to suppress her giggles but they spilled from her lips. Lee smirked against her skin, "there she is. There's my girl."

She let a laugh slip through, but she suppressed the moan that was stuck in her throat. It was so odd to feel him on her neck but it was an unfamiliar feeling that she liked. His hand never left her thigh, in fact he had sneakily moved it closer to her sex. She felt ashamed about the growing wetness that she could feel sticking to her.

Lee grabbed her hand and placed it right over the bulge straining in his pants. She let out a heavy sigh when she realized what it was. "That's how hard you make me. You making me so fucking hard girl," he growled in her ears. This was something only the senior girls from her high school could dream about when they talked about hooking up with their boyfriends. None of them were even half the man Lee was, and here he was: hard and ready just for her.

"L-Lee," her voice broke into bits, her body overheating from Lee taking control, "wait, can we slow down?"

"You taste so sweet baby," he continued kissing her, ignoring her until she was pulling away from his grasp. "What's wrong girl?" The furrowing of his brow made her worry that she pissed him off. Lee was all she had, he convinced her to put away her dream of going to college and stay here for him, if she ran him off then she'd have nothing else.

"I'm just nervous. I’ve never done this before Lee," she hoped her honesty went a long way and would make him take her home instead. But all it did was make him readjust himself in his seat and pull away from her rather coldly.

Lee was irritated with her, she got him all hard, but he did his best to temper his anger. She's lucky that he was on the job all day and didn't have a chance to drink yet or else she'd see the side of him that he purposely hid from her.

"Don't be nervous baby. You know I love you right?" She nodded her head with her wide eyes holding a sad look in them, "good girl. Let me show you something."

Lee patted his lap and Y/n looked at him with apprehension.

"C'mon now," he patted his lap once again, this time with a bit of impatience in his voice.

Y/n awkwardly shifted over the center console of his patrol car and found herself in his lap. His strong arms wrapped around her waist and he rested his chin on her shoulder. She tried to ignore how his bulge poked at her slit through her cotton panties.

"You ever been in a car this nice before?"

"Uh-uh," she shook her head, somewhat distracted by the beautiful interior and his cock poking at her. The only car she's ever drove was the shitty one that was passed down to her. Lee's patrol car doesn't look like it's more than five years old.

Seeing her look in wonder at the dash made him even harder. He began to rut against her, trying to feel as much friction as he could, but it wasn't enough to satiate a man who has been waiting a few months for this.

He sat back and started fumbling with his pants. Y/n heard the sound of the metal on his belt and unzipping of his pants but she froze on top of him instead of moving. She grabbed the steering wheel and held onto it as tight as she did the night he first laid eyes on her. Her alarm rose when Lee lifted her up a little to push her panties to the side.

"Lee what are you doing-"

"Shhh baby don't worry, I got you."

The sensation of his head poking at her slit and her sliding down him was unspeakable. She was uncomfortable with his splitting size, but he didn't move her at all, trying to give her some time to adjust but it was just so hard for him to restrain himself. She was so tight and warm, and definitely untouched by any man. "Fuck," he mumbled warmly in her ear. She felt him wrap his arm tighter around her, almost as if he was afraid she was going to somehow run away from him. Even if she wanted to, she wouldn't know her way back home and she'd be stuck out here. She was safe with Lee even though she found herself feeling more confusion than pleasure.

Those girls from her high school days had to been lying to her, sex didn’t feel all that magical; his patrol car was not a romantic place to lose her virginity. Lee rocked her on his cock slowly as she tried to find the same pleasure that he was experiencing. His heavy breath was on her ear as she stared straight up into the night sky.

"You feel so good. You feel so fucking good baby."

His pleasure is what made her want to stay on top of him like this. She cared for him so much and she just wanted Lee to be proud of her. The "good girl" that continuously spilled from his lips sounded like a hymn she wanted to memorize.

Y/n let Lee have his way with her body. He groped her breast through her dress and then let his hands graze her sides. She wondered what he was doing when his hand slipped into her panties, but the warmth that shot through her made her mind go blank. Lee rubbed at her sensitive bud and she constricted around him. Instead of whimpering, she was now fully moaning; the way it felt so good had put her discomfort into the back of her mind.

"Oh fuck -- move your hips girl. You feel so good."

He rubbed her harder as a reward for swirling her hips against him. She began to bounce on top of him and he no longer had to do the hard work, just lean back and feel her engulfing him in her warmth.

"Lee," she whimpered, unsure of herself, but then she called his name again, "Lee," as if to let him know that he was the one giving her pleasure.

Lee knew he wasn't going to last, not when she was as tight and wet as she was. He can't remember the last time he took someone's virginity, nor when he was this hard. It was clear to him that she had no idea what she was doing by the way she bounced on him without a rhythm. Sometimes she'd stall herself before moving fast again. It didn't irk him, he found it endearing that she was so inexperienced. He was going to have to show her a lot of things and get her to fuck him to his liking.

Y/n gasped when Lee pulled out of her and jerked himself until white liquid was splashing on the back of her panties. She'd have to wash them before her mother saw the stain.

"You did so good baby, taking my cock like a big girl," he placed a sloppy kiss on her cheek, still trying to catch his breath while she shifted on top of him. He put himself away and nudged her towards the empty passenger seat. She was silent the entire time he drove her home. A sense of pride filled her because she had made Lee feel good. The sex itself was too weird to describe as being good, but she liked how she felt inside when he told her she felt good and that she made him cum. That's all she wanted to do was please Lee.

-

Saturday morning proved to be another beautiful day. It seems as if Summer didn't want to leave just yet even though October was near. There wouldn't be many more opportunities for Lee to make his impressions and sway the last few voters not on his side.

The event had been boring at most, but Sally's words really shook her up. No one in town would deny that Mrs. Blackwater has always been a bitter women, but they also wouldn't necessarily turn the other cheek if she starts going around saying that Lee Bodecker is a murder. Y/n's new problem made her forget about the decaying brothel owner. She doesn't care how mean the whole town thought the old woman was, she wanted her gone.

"You slept in. Did I tire you out last night?" Lee had the same smug smirk on his face that has been imprinted on her brains since their early years together.

Y/n nodded even though it wasn't completely truthful. She slept so hard because she's mentally spent and it was finally catching up with her body. Lee had been too distracted to notice how distant she was last night and how she is still distant now. In his eyes, as long as she was eager to lay under him then everything was fine.

Most mornings started like this: Y/n waking up next to her still tired husband and waiting to hear her daughter crying for her. He trudged out of bed and she heard him beat a path down the hall to the bathroom. There was still no sound of her daughter needing her, giving her some time alone. It was nearly silent except for the faint sound of the shower going. She breathed deeply and found herself feeling serene. Just five minutes without the memory of Sally threatening to pull her and her husband's support taunting her.

"Y/n! Do you not hear her crying?" Lee held a stern look on face, he must have been standing there for a few minutes. His towel was wrapped around his waist, stomach hanging over the soft white cotton, "what's wrong with you girl?"

She shook her head, "nothing Lee. I'm just still a lil' tired."

His face softened at her explanation but he nodded his head towards the door so she could take care of their daughter. Y/n hurried not to upset him for the rest of the day.

Their baby was just fussy and hungry. Her little eyes weren’t that red so she hadn’t been crying for long. “You hungry?” Her daughter somewhat understood what her mother was saying because her eyes went wide. The nightgowns Lee had bought Y/n made it much easier for her to pull herself out of them to feed their girl. She could see her daughter calming down, eyes closing once again. Y/n thought about keeping her daughter with her but she needed to rest in her crib. She placed her down gently as not to disturb and wake her again. At least one person in this family deserves peace.

"Back to sleep?" Lee's voice startled her, but the hand on her hip soothed her. Y/n nodded, never taking her eyes away from her girl. "Precious isn't she? So sweet when she's not fussin' about."

"She only fusses because she's teething, and she misses her father."

"Honey, you know why I'm at work longer than usual. It's for her. It's for you. It's for us. Do you know how much better her life, your life, is going to be better after I win that race?"

"But what if you don't win?"

Y/n rarely questions Lee, not even over small things, so he was confused as to why she was questioning him now. Did his wife not believe in him? She worried a lot, but when he first ran for sheriff, she was not this doubtful.

"What are you trying to say?"

"Lee, I didn't say that. It's just that people been talkin' and -"

"And you believe them? So my own wife doesn't think I'm going to win because a few people can’t got some things wrong?”

Y/n flinched as his voice got louder. The brashness of his voice woke their girl up from her attempt to fall into a deep sleep. Instead of waking up and silently looking around, the first thing that came from her was a cry. It served as a way for Y/n to escape Lee's wrath. She pulled her crying daughter into her arms and held her close to her chest. One glance at Lee's face and she knew he was going to deal with her later. But for now he just sighed and walked out of the nursery.

"Aww don't cry honey. It was just your daddy, okay? He's not mad at you sweetheart. Don't cry...don't cry," Y/n's voice cracked and tears slipped down her face. Her pleas were more for herself than they were her daughter.

Lee's hesitance to address the obvious problems he faces in regards to the election made Y/n feel uneasy. All she wanted was for her husband to just outright say he never did those things, but he never did. And if Y/n has resulted to murder, then she knows deep down that he did some of those things that people allege. There were just things that were too loud to drown out. The business when it came to solving a string of murders that happened a few years ago and people talking about him didn't affect him when he was going for re-election. There was no one else that had a strong enough presence to go against him and the folks in town figured that Lee gets enough done as far as crime goes, even though he could do more.

Y/n should be tired of trying to clean up his mess when he was so short with her. However it is not entirely his fault; he does not know. Maybe one day he'll learn and be grateful for what she has done for him.

-

Lee just couldn't stop reminding her that Sandy and Carl were coming over. It's almost as if he knew it got under Y/n's skin and used it against her after she hurt his feelings this morning. He's a sensitive one, even though he hides it well from most people, but her moment of vulnerability wasn't meant to hurt him. Though if their conversation had progressed any further, she might have spilled what she did to the brothel owner. She may want to believe Lee would be proud of her, but she cannot be so sure. It's sickening to assume that someone would be proud of a murder. She quickly began to feel dirty after a few minutes with her own thoughts ever since Lee snapped at her.

"Can you clean up? We're going to be having guests soon."

There were just a few baby toys on the floor but it was best not to make things worse with Lee (even though those toys were going to end up in the same place anyway).

Lee stepped outside as Y/n put their daughter in her high chair. Ever since her birth Lee was mindful not to smoke in the house; it was one of the house rules Y/n proposed that he was surprisingly very accepting of. She had taken away most of the things that he used to destress: alcohol, cigarettes, and candies.

She heard the motor of a car and Lee's muffled voice. She knew it was them, but hoped they were just making a short trip over. It's not like Lee likes Carl, and he's constantly complaining about his trouble making sister. Y/n hates that Sandy uses their daughter as an excuse to come over. She wouldn't mind if Sandy came alone, but she hated Carl around her little girl and she's sure Lee feels the same way.

Y/n's mother had gotten their daughter such a stupid gift when she was born. A baby that's not even half a year old yet didn't need a toy that had a million little pieces they could easily choke on, but of course it was her favorite thing to place with. Lee never cleaned up the mess, it was always Y/n who was doing it. She tried her best to pick everything up before they stepped inside but she heard the front door open. She tensed up, but she only heard the heavy footsteps of one person, and god did she hope it was Lee.

"What you doin' down there?"

Her eyes trailed up and Carl was gazing down at her. Words got caught in her throat and she clutched her hand around one of the toy pieces, the edges of it painfully digging into her palm.

"Did I scare you?"

The smirk on her face made her want to shriek. She noted that he didn't call her "darlin'" like he used to. She can only guess what Lee did to him when he "took him out back" after calling her that for a few years.

"Where's my niece?"

Y/n shot up, not caring about the toys still on the floor. She'll be damned if Carl is alone with her daughter for even a second.

Sandy came in with Lee following behind her. He gave Y/n a look of understanding, he too hoped this was going to be a short visit. The sound of Sandy fawning over her niece overtook the room. Their daughter giggled and babbled at her aunt as if she could understand her.

"Y/n go make us some ice tea."

Usually Lee doesn't command her to do things, unless he was stressed or horny. She knew her was the former by the look on his face. He was aggravated and this visit wasn't going to make him feel any better. As Y/n left the room, Sandy sat down on their couch with their daughter in her arms. Carl sat next to them, making the alarm in Lee rise.

"I got you something honey," she pulled out a little doll from her purse. It looked tattered and Lee wondered where she got it from.

"You know she already has enough dollies," Lee joked. It didn't matter to his girl, it was a new toy, "got anything for your brother?"

Sandy eyes him before pulling out a small bag of candy. She tossed it to him and he caught it, "I knew you'd ask for somethin'"

He opened it and instantly popped a sweet cherry candy into his mouth.

"Y/n's not letting me drink since the girl is so young. This is the only thing I got, even though she's on my ass about that too," Lee knew that Sandy wasn't too interested in the ins-and-outs of his everyday life but he gets tired of complaining to his deputies.

"Yea, I bet," she kept a snide comment about her sister-in-law to herself. The box of cigarettes she had calling her name we're going to have to wait. "How's that mayor race going?"

"It's going."

"Heard that whore house owner croaked," Carl's voice carried to the kitchen and Y/n paused, "found in unusual circumstances...chairs pushed up against the door...poisoned. Reckon one of those girls got tired of him holdin' them down-"

"No smoking in the house," Lee interrupted when he noticed Carl reaching for the pack of cigarettes in his shirt pocket. Carl laughed as if he wanted to challenge Lee, but his hand went back to resting on the back of the couch.

"Wouldn't want this little darlin' smellin' like a bar."

Anytime Carl spoke at or about her daughter, Y/n wanted to vomit. Carl is not nice. She wonders how twisted Sandy might be to marry someone who is awful to women and has no filter.

There was a cloud of fear over her head when Carl was around. She wishes Lee was more apprehensive but Sandy's his little sister, and he cares for her no matter how much those two causes. Things would be different if Y/n had told Lee about that time Carl pressed himself against and put his hand up the skirt of her dress. His threat would forever bounce off her skull and it only got louder when he was near. "Shut you're fucking mouth or else your husbands gonna see his slut wife bending over for another man." She was five months pregnant and had no way to defend herself. He only groped her, but she always wondered if he would've gone further if Sandy hadn't come in looking for the cooking tongs Lee told her to fetch. Sandy knew something had happened, but she said nothing. Y/n's disdain for her only grew from that day on.

Lee redirected the conversation from what Carl had started to something a bit more asinine. He didn't want to talk about something work-related because he didn't need to be stressed out any further. Reed’s death wasn't another blow to his reputation like Lee thought it would. It was going to be another unsolved murder from the way it was looking though. The people assumed one of the girls did it. The place had been emptied out; it surely looked different from when Lee was last in there. Lee was lucky that Reed was extremely disliked, unlike that preacher Roy who died some years ago. More people said "he had it coming" instead of "why isn't the sheriff doing anything?"

He laughed about it though. When he was alone in the car after leaving the crime scene, he laughed. There was no more worrying about the rumor that Sheriff Lee Bodecker beat one of his girls. When Lee did go to that place, he was never forceful. Lee could be mean towards women at times, but he was never violent.

-

If Lee was called in on a Sunday morning, then it was very important. He woke Y/n up at 5 am and kissed her out of her confused state to say goodbye. She only slept for another hour after laying her head down back on the pillow.

This morning felt so different.

The morning she woke up knowing her task was to deal with Reed, she was distracted and jumpy. But she had grown so accustomed to her guilt that it's become a comfortable feeling. Mrs. Blackwater was a more personal score to settle. That woman was throwing dirt on Lee's name, but the turmoil she caused her teenage friend would never leave her mind. Y/n had learned how cruel someone could be without physically hurting you. The boys on school grounds were annoying brats, but that woman had a truly awful mouth.

The Petersons’ daughter was over right after church. She had a wide smile on her face, happy that Mrs. Bodecker was giving her another opportunity to make some money.

"She's been a fairly good mood lately," Y/n handed her daughter off to the shorter teenage girl, "she slept through the night for once, but she's still gonna need a nap. Once she starts fussin' put her in her crib. I should be back before Lee."

Y/n wished her well and the Petersons girl wished Y/n a good time running her errands. It was comical to think of this as an errand, even though today she was going to treat it like one.

She was in Lee's nice car again meaning she was going to have to temporarily get rid of it. Y/n put much more effort into this, her haphazard plan to take out Reed could've gone horribly wrong. She spent her time snooping around town when she was out with one of her mom friends. The plan had been simple: park the car at the crowded grocery just two blocks away from the Blackwater house. The house sat at the end of the street, a bit separated from the other row of houses because of the larger amount of land they owned. It wouldn't be a problem to walk to the house seeing as others in this neighborhood do the same thing.

When her mother had made that dress for her to wear to the Spring Formal, Y/n cried, saying she was going to look like a nurse instead of "the prettiest girl in town" like Jim, the guy who asked her to the dance said. A teenage grievance had somehow come in handy almost a decade later. It was under a long coat that was a bit abnormal for this warm day.

Y/n felt sickly confident. That only thing she worried about was Lee cruising through and seeing his car in the parking lot. But the grocery store offered a great cover. The sun was covered by a thick cloud as she walked away from the grocery store and to the old Blackwater house.

That porch still looked the same. It was old and rickety, squeaking as she stepped on it, she's surprised it didn't give it away some years ago. The rocking chair Mrs. Blackwater sat on while terrorizing people was no longer there. At least her days of scaring off the newer generation of kids were over.

Y/n knocked on the door and waited. She had to knock again, and by the third time she wondered if the old lady did the job for her!

"Who is it?" The voice was much more frail, but it was that voice.

"I'm here to help!" The upturn of her voice at the end made her statement sound more like a question.

The locks on the door began to click and Mrs. Blackwater peered at her.

"You're not the one they always send."

"Oh, she's sick today! I'm just filling in for her today!" After two weeks of watching, Y/n learned what days Mrs. Blackwater's nurse came and went. She came everyday but she was absent on Sundays. It's somewhat astounding that Mrs. Blackwater didn't ask about Y/n turning up on a Sunday.

"Ahh whatever," she dismissed, unlocking the screen door, and wheeling backwards in the wheelchair that she had been relegated to a few years ago.

Y/n didn't know what to expect when she stepped inside, but it wasn't too far off from how her parent's house looked; black and white photos littering the walls and stacks of paper that probably could've been thrown away a decade ago. What is different from her parent's home is that this place is an utter mess. The nurse that usually comes to take care of her could at least tidy it up a bit. With how much she hated everything, Y/n would've assumed she hated mess too, but her home says otherwise. This lady was an absolute hoarder.

"Don't bother me," Mrs. Blackwater sniped at her. She wheeled herself next to the couch and glued her eyes to the black and white television screen.

Y/n doesn't know how many hours Mrs. Blackwater spent sitting there and watching The Andy Griffin Show. She didn't laugh when something funny happened, she just sat there still, sometimes grumbling to herself in reaction to what was happening on screen.

The least Y/n could do was tidy up a bit. It would be a kind gesture to leave her to die in a presentable place.

Mrs. Blackwater is not going to die a violent death. She was awful, but she did not deserve the brutality like someone who has done physical harm did. (If she was just a little bit braver, she would've hacked him to death, but the sight of blood makes her ill). Mrs. Blackwater was up in age, nearing her 90s, and it would be time for her to go soon anyway. Y/n dusted around the TV, one of the last things this old woman may see. All the photos of people on the walls were staring at her as she moved about cleaning the dust from the frames. So many people, many dead but most probably alive. Mrs. Blackwater had children and probably grandchildren but no one came to visit her. Her tongue was sharp, but how could no one come and visit their aging mother?

"Stop moving so damn much. Sit down girl."

The venom was still in her voice. It would never go away, at least not until she dies. This woman didn't appreciate anything and enjoyed being miserable. Y/n listened to her like that scared little teenager she used to be. She sat on the couch, a few feet away from Mrs. Blackwater who had not taken her eyes off the TV or moved at all. Y/n was spending time with a woman who was going to die at her hands today. If she's going to die then at least she's going to die doing what she loves; watching her shows and bitching out the closest person in reach.

She had only moved to grab the newspaper from the table on the other side of her. It was Friday's addition, Y/n could tell from the photo on the cover. She couldn't help but eye the old woman as she read the paper. It has been probably three hours and she hasn't even asked for anything to eat.

"People droppin' like flies in this shit hole."

Y/n's ears perked up, but she didn't say anything, she just let the lady talk.

"Leroy should know better not to do that shit here...especially with that corrupt sheriff around...would've had an easier time gettin' away with it in the city. Everyone in the city already does all that illegal shit so it probably wouldn’t have mattered anyway. Now he’s dead."

Y/n had heard that name before. She remembers vividly Lee chewing someone out on the phone and saying their name with contempt. Leroy, Leroy, Leroy. The name "Bobo" also came up in the conversation a few times. Y/n wanted to be mad at Mrs. Blackwater for referring to her husband as "corrupt" but something nagged at her to keep the conversation going for her sake.

"W-what do you mean?" Her voice cracked but it was ignored by the old woman.

"You must not be from here. Everyone knows that if you get caught up with that fat bastard sheriff you must be doin’ some awful shit. The only reason why he keeps gettin' re-elected is because everyone is scared of him. It doesn't matter how many babies that man has, he's a killer...dragging that man's body and fucking up carnations..."

No one had ever talked to Mrs. Bodecker about her husband like this. Town gossipers had the decency to wait until she left the room to say something about him. But she's not Mrs. Bodecker right now. It does not matter anyway because the old lady doesn't know what she's talking about. She hasn't spent the hours with Lee, with him being sweet and so soft with his daughter. Y/n firmly believes that if Lee did indeed kill someone then it was for a good reason. She knows her husband involves himself in dirty things, but it had to be for a good reason. Lee did not show brutality for no reason; he didn't get his rocks off on hurting innocent people.

"People can change. I'm sure he's a different man now."

"Why!? Because he got a bitch and a bastard? You are too naïve...at least the other girl they send has some more sense in her head. No man is going to want to marry a dumb girl."

An awkward silence surrounded them but it was mostly felt by Y/n. She found herself frozen with a ball of rage and anxiety in her stomach. But she had no time to dwell for much longer though.

"I'm thirsty...go make me something."

Y/n noticed Mrs. Blackwater flinching when she grabbed the remote to turn the volume higher. She either had arthritis or just pain in her hands.

"Okay...do you need to take any pills at this time?"

"My husbands gone and my children don't visit me. You think I care about taking my pills?"

Maybe Mrs. Blackwater would be kind to her if she knew Y/n was going to take her out of her misery. Breaking open the capsules and dumping it in the tea she made for her is going to do the job. She might succumb to a heart attack, or pass peacefully. The only person Y/n felt bad for was the poor nurse who was going to find her dead tomorrow morning.

-

Lee was able to leave his shift earlier than expected. Sundays are very quiet, the only thing he got up to was paperwork at the station. He could go home early to his wife, play with the girl while Y/n makes dinner, and get a nice ride from his wife while their daughter sleeps. Y/n said something about needing him to pick up some chicken stock from the grocery store.

People filled in and out of the grocery store as the sun began to set. A few people spoke to him, never for too long knowing that he's not fond of small talk. But more people being friendly with him was a good sign. Even without his sweet wife next to him, no one shied away from saying hello to the man running for Mayor.

Two boxes of chicken stock should be enough even though his wife sent him for three. The brand she likes isn’t exactly cheap. Lee promptly made his way to the cashier who greeted him with a smile.

"Good evening sheriff!" her voice was sweet and she batted her eyes a few times. Lee offered her a smile, but a small laugh escaped. This girl couldn't be younger than 20 but she fawned over him like a young school girl. Her behavior reminded him of Y/n when she was that age. "Darlene said she saw your car in the parking lot but didn't get a chance to catch Mrs. Bodecker herself."

Lee stopped caring about the items (a few snuck in there for him) being rung up. His brows furrowed and the girl realized that she had said something maybe she shouldn't have.

"My wife was here?"

"That's what Darlene said. Her shift ended right as I was coming in so I wasn't there when it happened...do you still want the chicken stock?"

"Yea yea just ring it up."

Lee's mind was too preoccupied with the weird behavior his wife has been exhibiting for the last several weeks. She often hovered over him when he was on the phone like she was interested in what he was talking about. All the swearing and terms she didn't understand kept her from asking what his loud, and often abrasive, phone conversations were about. But now she was listening a little too hard for his liking.

The only time Y/n was supposed to drive their car is if Lee told her she could or if there was an emergency. A trip to the grocery store did not fall under either of those categories. But it was particularly weird to him that she would go to the store when she told him to go himself. If she had forgotten something, she would have not hesitated to call the station. Something was up with her.

Everything felt normal as he stepped into the house. The smell of what she was cooking hit his nose and the familiar noises of his daughter babbling louder than the Y/n moving around the kitchen. If he had no questions for his wife, then he'd feel all warm inside walking into his home in this current state.

Y/n was talking to their daughter as if she was holding a real conversation with her. Their daughter started squealing when she saw Lee appear in the doorway. He put his index finger to his lips to tell her to quiet herself, but she was only louder.

"I couldn't believe it either! They said the hairdresser purposefully dyed Marie's hair darker," she spoke, thinking her daughter was just squealing because she was talking to her and not because her husband was creeping up behind her.

Hands snaked around her waist and she nearly jumped. "Oh yea? Is that what the town is gossipin' about today?" Lee's familiar voice soothed her and she turned around in his arms. She deftly kissed him and looked up at him.

"Wanna know what else I heard?" He whispered to her. Y/n nodded, a smile spreading on her face as she rested her forehead against his, "heard the sheriff's wife been out and about and driving his nice car."

Y/n's smile fell from her face, but it only made Lee smile wider.

"You wanna tell me what you were doing out?"

"I needed something from the store."

"So my task to pick up the chicken stock after work was for nothing?"

"No...I went to my parents house...didn't want to go empty-handed. You know how my mother gets."

What a sweet little liar.

But she still had the smell of an old house lingering around her so maybe it wasn’t completely a lie. Still, he knew something was up with her.

“How was work?” She quickly tried to change the subject. Lee was not really in the mood to interrogate her, it was Sunday after all. He sat down in the chair next to his daughter's high chair. She started reaching for his hat but he was too far away, so Lee rested his head on the tray and let her have her fun. Y/n was probably going to be mad at him for putting his head where she eats and getting all of his “outside germs” all over it, but he didn’t care.

“I’m tired,” he confessed, a heavy sigh escaping him, “I’m really fucking tired.”

Y/n wishes she could lift more of her husband’s burdens. Killing people who were talking about him did not get rid of the core problem. Sometimes she wishes he never decided to run for mayor. Life was so much more comfortable when he would run unopposed for county sheriff. Instead her husband had a bigger dream. From the very beginning she felt like it was a long shot that this would be successful, but they had gotten so far in changing how most of the people viewed Lee. And even though they felt a way about him, they still respected the sheriff.

“It’s going to be over soon. I promise.”

He truly wanted to believe her, but the sinking feeling that the past was going to catch up with him was not going away.

[farfromsugafanfic]

Lock & Key

Genre: Best Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Angst

Pairing: Jungkook/Reader

Warnings: cursing, dirty jokes

Synopsis: When Jungkook ditches you on your birthday, your friendship looks like it’s about to crumble. Your friend group becomes tired of your bickering and decides to take the matter into their own hands. Somehow, you and Jungkook find yourselves handcuffed together.

"Have you guys found a present for Y/N yet?" Jin asked, picking up his third pizza slice and taking a large bite, the cheese stretching as he pulled it away from his lips.

"You haven't gotten it yet? Her birthday dinner is tomorrow," Taehyung said. His eyes were tired, but he'd still insisted on joining the party despite having just gotten off a long train ride, as he hadn't seen his friends from high school for months. "I got her the first two manga in that series she's been wanting to read."

"Mmm," Jin said, seeming to consider Taehyung's choice of gift. "I need mine to be really special. He finished his pizza to the crust and turned it 180 degrees and bit into the end. "Jungkook, you're closest to Y/N. What are you getting her?"

Jungkook turned, wide-eyed towards Jin. The younger's face was already a bit flushed from the beers and from the mention of your name. "I'm paying for her part of the meal tomorrow and I got her tickets to that musical that's only in town for one night."

"Woah, that's gonna be hard to beat," Jimin said, "Y/N hasn't stopped talking about that musical since they announced it. Remember how she went crazy over it in the group chat?"

"I'm sure Y/N will like whatever you get her," Jungkook said. "She isn't very picky and she'll appreciate it because it came from you."

"I know. I just have something special planned and I want it to be perfect." The six other guys looked to the eldest expectantly. Jin sighed. "Gosh, fine, I'll tell you. I plan on confessing to her tomorrow."

"What? You like Y/N?! Since when?"

"Woah, congrats man!"

"You'll make such a cute couple."

The group fell to chaos, but Jungkook was notably the least excited. At the mention of Jin's plans, he sunk back against the wall and took a large bite of his pizza, followed by a gulp of beer.

"I'm not sure when I started liking her," Jin said. "I just kind of realized that I do. I figured we are friends and I'll regret it if I don't give it a shot."

"Are you sure her birthday is the best time to confess?" Jungkook asked, finally piping up. "What if things don't go well and you ruin it? Are you going to do it in front of everyone?"

"I thought about it and I'm going to wait until after the meal. Maybe I'll be able to steal her away for a few moments after she opens our gifts."

Jungkook's nose wrinkled and he was obviously unsatisfied with the answer. Yet, he dropped it and reached for another slice of pizza. "Why does it matter to you Jungkook? It's not like we all still won't hang out or that you'll never see her."

"Y/N's been hurt before. I'm sure you remember how upset she was after Minsung. I had to sleep in her bed for two weeks because she'd wake up crying. I never want her to feel that hurt again."

"Jungkook, I won't hurt her. She's more likely to hurt me. Why do you care so much about her heart being broken anyway? You're not the one who broke it and you aren't responsible for fixing it. Y/N's a big girl, she can handle herself."

Jungkook pouted. "I have to pee," he said, standing up and leaving the room, carrying his pizza slice with him.

vVv

An array of appetizers were spread across the table, a few bites taken from each. You were just waiting on the last three to show up: Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook. You expected them to come together as they had been nearly inseparable in high school. As Jin finished off one of the appetizers, you spotted Jimin and Taehyung walking in. You got up and rushed towards them.

"Happy birthday!" Jimin and Taehyung said, nearly tripping each other as they ran to hug you. "It's been too long, Y/N!" The two boys had moved out of the city for college and you rarely got to see them. You didn't know what you do if Jungkook--your best friend--had gone with them.

"I'm so glad you guys could make it! Come on and sit down, we're just waiting on Jungkook."

The appetizers were gone and the missing chair at the table remained. Worry grew in your throat and you glanced down at your phone for the umpteenth time to see if he had texted you. Even, just a simple "Running late!" or "Stuck in traffic!" would calm your nerves.

"Have you guys heard from Jungkook at all?"

The other guys all shook their heads and gave you sympathetic looks. You'd put off ordering, but it'd been nearly an hour since most of you arrived and you didn't want to keep the staff waiting any longer. "All right, let's order."

"I'm sure he just got stuck in traffic or something, Y/n," Jin said, reaching out and tapping your hand.

Your heart dropped as you read his last reply. You felt tears stinging your eyes, but you pushed them back before the other guys could notice.

"He's not coming," you said.

"What?" you heard someone ask, but you were too focused on not allowing your spiraling thoughts ruin your birthday and holding back tears to register who it was.

"He said he got a date or something. I don't know, but come on, we can enjoy this without him."

Due to the solemn looks on their faces, you knew they saw right through your facade. You and Jungkook had been best friends since elementary school where he accidentally trampled you when he was racing his friends. Despite ending up with a badly skinned knee and a couple of bruises, you were fine, but Jungkook had insisted on taking you to the nurse's office anyway. He pretended to sprain his ankle just so he could sit and keep you company.

What had happened since then? You'd never felt like your friendship was dwindling when it came to Jungkook. Whenever either of you dated, it didn't make a difference. High school graduation didn't separate you. Not even when Jungkook forced you to a haunted house in high school and laughed when he saw the stain on your jeans and realized you'd peed your pants in fright.

Despite ignoring for Overwatch or coming to your apartment just for the free food, he always ended up doing small things to make up for it. You often found chocolate bars stashed in the odd drawer or cupboard to make up for all the food he steals. After he finished laughing, Jungkook allowed you to wear his sweatshirt to cover it and bought you new jeans. You still had that sweatshirt stashed in your closet somewhere.

vVv

The tears stopped by the end of dinner, but now anger ran down your spine. How dare he skip your birthday for someone he just met? He'd never done anything like this before, he was the one person in this world that you could depend on, and now he's not. You feel a pang of sadness in your stomach and reach out for your portion of the bill, which Jungkook had promised to pay for.

"Stop," Jin said, reaching for the bill you'd just barely wrapped your fingertips around. "You're not paying. We'll split yours." You nodded, powerless to the eldest's tone.

After the bill was paid, everyone got up and starting readying to leave. You had taken a taxi, expecting Jungkook to take you home afterward. Jin seemed to notice, his brown eyes melting when they met yours.

"Hey, come on, I'll walk you home."

You nodded and waved goodbye to the other guys as you all walked in opposite directions or climbed into taxis. You didn't catch the other guys thumbs upping Jin and giving him reassuring smiles.

"Thanks for coming," you said. "Even though it kinda got ruined."

"I'll always come, Y/N."

"Oh, when I get a hold of his bunny ass--"

"Go easy on him, Y/N. I'm sure he has a better reason than he told you."

"He better be on his death bed then."

Jin let out a snort, which caused you to smile, but the smile soon faded and so did the fake happiness the anger made you feel. Now you just felt hopeless and felt the tears stinging in your sinuses again.

"Do," you said, already your voice faltering. "you think I'm still enough?"

Jin stopped. "What do you mean?"

"Am I still enough for him? Maybe he found a better friend," you said, your gaze painting the sidewalk. "I mean, I always rely on him. He's always my shoulder to cry on. Maybe he finally got tired of it. Got tired of me."

Jin placed a hand on your shoulder. It felt odd, as Jin wasn't one for skinship, but his touch was comforting, even if you were imagining it was Jungkook's. Except you couldn't, Jungkook's touch was old, familiar, warm. Like the fireplace at your grandparent's house or when your car is completely heated on a snowy day. Jin's--sure, it was warm--but it wasn't Jungkook.

"No, no, of course not," Jin said, moving to hug you, your cheek hitting his chest. "That could never happen. You and Jungkook have been friends for years. If he was gonna get tired of you, he would've already."

You scoffed, half in laughter and half in fear. "Thanks."

"Okay, but seriously, Jungkook cares about you. A lot." Jin paused and sighed. You looked up, noticing his eyes weren't on you, but rather he was looking up. His eyes looked glazed, but you didn't remember him having any drinks. "He wouldn't allow himself to lose you, Y/N. Trust me."

The rest of the walk was filled with a comfortable silence. It was only a few more blocks from where you'd stopped, so you reached your apartment in just a few minutes.

"Thanks for walking with me," you said. "Sorry, I got kinda sad halfway through."

Jin shook his head and reached to move a piece of your ponytail that had escaped from the hairband and fallen roguishly over your head.

"You don't need to apologize for your feelings, Y/N. Just promise me you won't kill the kid. I'm sure this is all just a misunderstanding."

You nodded, although you weren't convinced that Jungkook didn't now hate you for reasons you didn't know.

"Thanks," you said. "For everything."

Jin nodded. "You're welcome." He turned and walked into the night and you turned your back before he disappeared.

vVv

"How did the confession go?" Jimin asked, as soon as Jin walked into the small apartment he shared with Yoongi, which was now cramped with six bodies.

"It didn't."

Jimin and the other faces in the room all contorted in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I didn't confess."

"But, why? Wasn't that your plan? Don't you like her?"

"She loves someone else," Jin said, his voice deeper than usual, his heartbreak captured in the back of his throat. "And, someone else loves her."

vVv

Two Days Later

You hadn't heard anything from Jungkook since the night of your birthday and you weren't sure what hurt more--the fact that he didn't care enough to explain himself or that he had seemingly replaced you. His Instagram was full of stories and posts of him with the girl you assumed was the one he skipped your birthday for. She was beautiful with large dark eyes and curly hair. His arm was around her shoulders and then eventually her waist. He must really like her because you remember how it took Jungkook nearly two years just to feel comfortable placing an arm around you.

You huffed and threw your phone onto your bed as you ran your hands through your hair. You were still mad, but you didn't want to lose your best friend. You remembered Taehyung mentioning how all the guys were getting together for Overwatch.

You hardly thought as you headed towards Jin's and Yoongi's apartment--the largest of the apartments belonging to those in your friend group.

You didn't bother knocking as you entered the apartment. You found the seven guys all crowded onto two couches and watching Taehyung and Jungkook. They didn't notice you until you slipped in and placed your hand  on Jimin's shoulder—who jumped at your touch.

"Y/N!"

All seven heads turned to look at you. Most breaking into smiles and friendly greetings and offering you snacks.

"What are you doing here?" Jungkook asked, his voice breaking through the revelry. He was normally so soft-spoken, but at this moment, his voice grated through the air.

"I was hoping we could talk."

"You weren't invited here."

Your stomach turned. He'd never spoken to you like this, ever. Jungkook was normally the happiest when you showed up unannounced.

"Since when do I need an invitation, Jungkook? This is Jin and Yoongi's place, not yours."

Jungkook didn't respond but instead unpaused the game. Taehyung barely had time to close his mouth from watching the two of you that he fumbled with the controller as he realized Jungkook had restarted the game.

"Oh, so you're just gonna ignore me then?"

You rolled your eyes at how typical this was of all your ex-boyfriends. Towards the end of the relationship, they always ignored you for something else. Sometimes it was someone else, others it was their job. And yet, others, it was video games.

Jungkook had been there with you for all of these failed relationships. He said you deserved someone better, someone, who would never leave you or ignore you. You thought he was the only constant in your life, the one person who would never leave you, but now, he was just like all the rest.

Tears stung your sinuses. You dug your feet into the carpet and grabbed onto the back of the couch, trying to focus on the game. The guys had gone back to talking amongst themselves, eating, and watching the game. Yet, the air felt different, you caught concerned glances flicking your way and Jin silently offered you a slice of pizza which you declined, only eliciting another puppy-eyed look from the eldest of the group.

Jungkook was close to winning and the tears were soon beginning to simmer and your hands balled into fists. Before you could think or stop yourself, you marched around the couch and reached for the cord that was connected to the Xbox. The screen went black and all the eyes in the room shifted to you.

"Y/N?! What the fuck?!" Jungkook said, his voice rising. "I was about to win!"

"Jungkook, we need to talk and you're being an asshole."

Jungkook's ears were red and his eyes hard as steel. "This is ridiculous, Y/N. You came here uninvited to talk to me and when I go back to playing games because that's what I'm here for, you unplugged the system and demand I talk to you. And, I'm the asshole?"

You wanted to scream and pull your hair out. Yet, the thing you wanted most was to cry into Jungkook's oversized, black T-shirt because you knew it smelled of his cologne.

"Jungkook, you skipped my birthday party and you said we could talk about it, but it's been two days and I just want my best friend back."

"Y/N, why can't you just take the hint you're not wanted? This was supposed to be a guy's night and now you've had to come in here and ruin everything. You're way too clingy, like, this is why they always leave you."

"Jungkook!" Jin said.

You barely registered as the other boys chastised Jungkook as your vision blurred from the tears. You swore you saw his face soften before your eyes were totally filled with tears, but you couldn't be sure.

"Y/N," Jin said. You felt his hand come to rest gently on your shoulder. "Come on, I'll take you home."

vVv

A few days later you found yourself standing outside of Jungkook's apartment. You knew Taehyung and Jimin were staying with him, so you secretly hoped one of them would open the door.

The hallway was silent and dimly lit. It felt like midnight despite being noon. You softly knocked on the door, the sound--while quiet--seemed to echo down the hallway. You weren't sure what you were going to do or say when he opened the door. You were only sure that you missed the way he used to show up at your place at midnight with ice cream sandwiches or the way he let you borrow his sweatshirts when you were cold or couldn't sleep.

Thirty seconds passed and you knocked again. Firmer this time, each knock ringing out in the empty hallway.

"Jungkookie," you said softly.

You heard footsteps on the other side of the door. They were faint, but you recognized them from when he slept over at your apartment when you were sick or going through a rough time.

You listened as the door unlocked and slowly opened. He only opened the door a crack, just enough to peak out, as if you were an unknown person knocking on his door. As if you didn't know the layout of his apartment or that he kept all his mess concentrated to the common areas and his bedroom immaculate.

"Y/N...what are you doing here?"

His voice was softer than the last time you spoke. You knew Jin had told Jungkook how much you cried as he took you home and how you didn't answer his texts all night.

"I just wanted to see you," you said. "We don't have to talk or anything. I just miss you."

Jungkook didn't say anything. His eyes scanning over you. Your hair was unwashed and pulled into a bun and you wore sweatpants and a T-shirt. Dark circles outlined your eyes and even though it had only been a few days, your face looked thinner and your skin languid.

Another set of footsteps approached and the door swung open wider. Taehyung stood there in just his boxers and munching on a piece of toast. His eyes widened when he saw you and he glanced over at Jungkook, who's eyes were looking down at your feet.

"Hey, stop being a dick and let her in."

"Put on some clothes then," Jungkook said, his voice quiet and low, almost a growl. He swung the door all the way open and disappeared into his apartment.

Taehyung met your eyes and shrugged. He offered a small smile as you walked into the apartment. You hadn't brought anything with you, not sure exactly what would happen.

"I won't stay long," you said. "I just wanted to see him."

"At least have breakfast with me," he said, dropping two pieces of bread into the toaster.

You nodded and fell onto the couch. You'd done this countless times. At 4 in the morning after a night out, you'd collapse on Jungkook's couch still in your heels and your makeup slowly wearing off. You usually woke up the next morning in Jungkook's bed, your heels set by the door and your makeup at least mostly wiped off. At 6 pm as you leaned against Jungkook's shoulder as the movie started, your hand diving into the popcorn bowl in his lap. Most of your favorite memories happened on his couch.

"I hope you like Nutella," Tae said, handing you a piece of toast.

You laughed. "I love it," you said. "How do you stay so fit eating like this?"

Taehyung was still in his boxers. While he didn't have a six pack, he certainly wasn't hard to look at and the slight toning of his stomach showed he was putting in some effort.

"I'll gain five pounds just from eating this," you said, and despite your words, you took a large bite.

"Then you should have another," Jungkook said from the other side of the room. You hadn't noticed him there, he must've slipped in when Taehyung distracted you with the toast. "You're getting too skinny."

"I didn't ask you, Jungkook," you said. You crossed your arms over your chest and sat back, your toast abandoned on the arm of the couch.

"I'm just worried about you."

"Since when? When you stopped texting me? Or, when you ditched my birthday party for someone you just met?"

Jungkook's eyes turned soft in the way that would usually make you melt. But, you kept your eyes off of his and your spine straight.

"Y/N..."

"Listen, Jungkook, I might've come here cause I missed you, but that doesn't mean I've forgiven you."

Jungkook didn't say anything. Silence filled the apartment and after what felt like an eternity, he left to his bedroom.

"Are you okay?" Taehyung asked.

You nodded. "I think I just need a nap or something. I'm getting a headache." You looked around the apartment. There was only one bedroom and both Taehyung and Jimin were staying with Jungkook during their visit. "Where are you sleeping?"

Taehyung nodded and gestured toward the couch. "There," he said.

"Oh," you said. "Can I borrow it for an hour or so?"

"Be my guest. But, you know, even though you two are fighting and all, I bet Jungkook would let you have the bed."

You shook your head. "No," you said. "I'm not asking him for any favors and the couch looks more comfortable anyway."

Taehyung shrugged. You laid down and turned your back to him, missing the knowing smile as he cleaned up. You listened as he cleaned up and got dressed before leaving the apartment. It wasn't long before the tears came and you sobbed into the couch cushion as quietly as you could. The last thing you wanted was for Jungkook to emerge from his bedroom and find you like this.

He'd seen you cry dozens of times and you'd even held him as he sobbed into you. You didn't mind crying in front of him, but you knew it would destroy him to see you like this and to know he was the cause. Even if you mad at him, even if you were losing him, you didn't want to crush him.

You didn't remember falling asleep, but when you awoke, his scent was everywhere. You pressed your face into the pillow and stretched out your legs comfortably. You sighed until a thought crossed your mind. Pillow?

You opened your eyes and found yourself in Jungkook's bedroom. It was dark and the covers were pulled up to your chin. Jungkook wasn't in the room and from the empty feeling in the air, he wasn't in the apartment either. Your phone was next to you on the nightstand and plugged into Jungkook's charger.

You glanced at the time and realized your nap had lasted three times longer than you anticipated and you sat in bed as you realized that you probably needed to go home. However, before you could pull your eyes away from your lock screen, a text notification from a couple of hours ago caught your attention.

vVv

"Hey, sorry, I'm late," Taehyung said, walking into Jin and Yoongi's apartment where the other five boys were already crowded on the twin couches. "Y/N showed up at Jungkook's and I needed to see what happened."

The others all looked at Taehyung expectantly. "Jungkook doesn't know about this, right?"

"We didn't tell him."

Taehyung nodded. "Well, they're definitely in love with each other. Jungkook was jealous as hell and Y/N's heartbroken. I could practically see Jungkook splitting in half when he realized how upset she was."

"Well, didn't you all notice how when she started crying after he got mad at her for unplugging the Xbox, how he just broke? I don't think he cared about the game anymore, but then Jin swooped in and stopped it before he could apologize."

All eyes swiped towards Jin and he shrugged. "What? She was to the point of crying. I didn't know what he was going to do and I didn't want to upset either of them more."

"Does he know that you never confessed?"

Jin shook his head. "He never asked."

"Jin!" all the guys said at one.

"That would change everything! He probably thinks you and Y/N are together."

"It's pretty obvious we're not."

"I don't know the way you intervened during the fight and walked her home. It could be seen as you protecting her."

"Well, whatever, what's the plan? We have to get them to make up somehow. And confess, cause they're gonna drive us crazy pining after each other." Jin looked around at the other faces and all of them were, in turn, watching him.

"Well, we need to force them to be alone somehow," Namjoon said. "We could try locking them somewhere, but that's gonna be difficult cause the party is here and none of the doors lock." Eyes wandered as they tried to find a solution and eventually, Jin's eyes fell on the TV where a cartoon cop was catching a criminal, the handcuffs snapping down on the culprit's wrists.

"I think I might have an idea."

vVv

Taehyung and Jimin were taking the train back to their college town in the morning, so that meant you'd all spend the night before getting drunk and gorging yourselves on all the pizza you could.

Jin and Yoongi offered to host the party and a few of their neighbors offered up their apartments so everyone could spread out. You all invited your extended friends and neighbors if everyone came, you didn't doubt the party would probably get out of hand, but that was half the fun.

As you brushed on your blush and primped your hair for the final time, you felt butterflies in your stomach. Jungkook was going to be there. There was no way he would miss out on a good party and the opportunity for free food and drinks.

You wore a short white dress that was admittedly a little shorter than you would normally wear. But, with Jungkook ignoring you, you wanted attention and you didn't really care who it was from. Plus, you liked the way it hugged your curves and how when paired with the perfect heels, made your legs look longer.

You arrived a few minutes early to the party with the expectation of helping set up, but the party was already in full swing. When the elevator opened, people crowded the hall with cups in hand and music blasting from Jin and Yoongi's apartment. At this rate, the cops would be called in a couple hours, unless Jin and Yoongi had talked to all their neighbors beforehand, but you highly doubted it.

You waded through the bodies and found your friends all invested in a game of beer pong. The younger three on one end and the older four on the other. The older ones were currently winning and you smirked as you remembered just how good Yoongi was at the game.

"Need help?" you asked, placing your arm around Taehyung's shoulders, the heels allowing you to do so easier, although it still looked slightly awkward.

"Ah, finally! Someone who can rival Yoongi!"

You laughed, trying not to allow your eyes to wander over to Jungkook who was standing closer to you than he had for weeks. "Who's turn is it?"

"Yours if you want."

You nodded and walked up to the table. You angled your arm and aimed for one of the back cups, even if you missed, it may still land in one of the front cups that remained. You tossed the ping pong ball and it sailed perfectly into the cup.

"Yes! Drink up, Min Yoongi!"

Yoongi smirked and took the cup and downed it. You two had played this game countless time, both won and lost countless times, to the point that it was no longer about winning, but rather, who could get the other drunk quicker.

Yoongi aimed his shot and tossed it flawlessly into the cup right in front of you. You took out the ball and downed the cup. The beer was pretty much tasteless which meant it went down easily but left a bad taste in the back of your throat.

After a few shots back and forth, you had drunk twice more and Yoongi once. You were aiming up another shot, intending to tie it up when you felt a hand on your shoulder. You looked behind you and caught Jungkook's eyes.

"Are you gonna let us play?"

"Do you want to win or not?" you said, turning back and aiming up your shot. You were already a little tipsy and your head ached as you concentrated.

"Y/N, it'll be no fun to get drunk so early," he said. "Come on." His voice was soft and familiar. He'd done this dozens of times. Prevented you from getting too drunk or going home with the wrong guy. He brought you back when the alcohol began to take over. This time--however--you turned away and aimed the ball. Missing.

Yoongi tosses the ball in what appears to be a haphazard fashion, but it sinks straight into a cup. You pick it up and bring it to your lips, but before you can drink, the cup is being knocked from your hands and the beer spills almost entirely onto your dress.

You see Jungkook staring at you wide-eyed--the obvious culprit--his hand still gripping the cup.

"Jungkook!" you yelled, people turned in your direction, but your yell was soon forgotten as the music continued. All but your small group turned back to their own conversations. "Would you stop trying to be my friend? You made it quite obvious you no longer wanted our friendship and you just keep screwing everything up!"

"Y/N, I..."

Tears were beginning to fill your eyes and the only thing you wanted to do was get drunk and forget this night happened. You stepped forward to push through the crowd when someone grabbed your wrist. You knew from the touch that it wasn't Jungkook and when you glanced back, Jin's lips were upturned in a small smile.

"Wait, Y/N," he said. "I'm really sorry about this."

You cocked your head in confusion, but before your lips could form words to ask Jin what he was apologizing for you felt something click onto your wrist and found a handcuff locked around your wrist and you noticed the other was locked to another wrist. You followed the chain and met Jungkook's dark, confused eyes.

"Have fun, kids. We aren't unlocking you until you talk everything out."

vVv

Ten minutes later you stood in the kitchen as Jungkook tried to work a kitchen knife into the lock. The beer was slowly making your dress more and more see-through and you glanced around the room.

"Jungkook, can we try this somewhere else?"

He looked up at you with his brows furrowed in confusion. You hadn't managed to say anything before his eyes widened and he quickly shrugged off his flannel. It caught on his cuff and he struggled to get the sleeve over the handcuff and chain.

"Fuck it," he said, taking the knife and cutting into the seam where the sleeve met the shoulder.

"Jungkook isn't this a bit drastic? We can just go into the bathroom or something."

"No, it's okay. I can just cut off the other one later."

He brought around the uncut sleeve and brought over your shoulder and brought the cut sleeve over the chain and up your arm. The way the flannel hit it ended up covering your entire dress and draping across your bare thighs.

As soon as you were covered and comfortable again, he once again tried to unlock the handcuffs and your hand was at his mercy as he moved the knife point back and forth in the lock.

"Jungkook, this isn't going to work. You're just gonna end up hurting one of us."

Jungkook sat the knife back on the counter looked down dejectedly at your cuffed wrists. You couldn't help the pang of hurt in your stomach. Jin had handcuffed the two of you so you would talk and all Jungkook could focus was on how to get the handcuffs off without talking.

"Maybe we can break the chain," he said. "If we both pull, our combined strength might be enough."

Your wrist was already starting to become red and raw because Jin had accidentally snapped the cuff on a little tight, but before you could protest, Jungkook began pulling on the chain.

You immediately yelped in pain and your wrist attempted to escape the pain, causing your body to fold in on itself. You found yourself crouched and leaning against the counter, your arm almost straight above your head to remain close enough to Jungkook's so that it didn't dislocate the joint.

"Y/N?" Your name was barely audible over the music and the people around you many of which shot odd glances or coy smiles your way.

"It's tight, Jungkook. Jin accidentally locked it too tight. Can--can we just go talk and get these things off?"

Jungkook nodded, seeing your teary eyes from the pain and helping you to your feet. His free palm came to rest on your shoulder and his handcuffed hand grasped your wrist and he slipped two of his fingers between your skin and the cuff. It was the first time he'd touched you since before your birthday and you felt your knees go weak and something shifted in you with his touch. The plate tectonics of your heart shifting suddenly and with no warning.

"Let's go to the bathroom, first."

You were confused as he pulled you into the bathroom and situated you against the counter. He reached into the cupboard behind you and pulled out some lotion and squirted it onto his handcuffed hand. He rubbed it softly onto your wrist where the handcuff had rubbed the skin red and raw.

"Better?"

You nodded and looked up at his face which hovered not far above yours but was focused down on your wrist. His jaw was clenched and his features were stiff. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out the sleeve he'd cut from his flannel.

"I think if we roll this down we can put it between the cuff and your wrist. It might make it feel tight, but it won't hurt you so much."

He rolled the sleeve down under it was a single cuff which he carefully slipped over your hand and under the cuff. It did work, your skin feeling relieved from the lotion and the cloth, although it did still feel slightly too tight.

"Thanks," you said. "But, maybe we should get out of here. I don't want your girlfriend to get the wrong idea."

Jungkook met your eyes. "What? Girlfriend?"

"The girl you went on the date with?"

"Oh, it uh, didn't work out."

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

There was a long pause as Jungkook continued to adjust the cuff to ensure it stayed. His eyes were focused on your wrist.

"I'm sorry," he said. "For saying you were clingy and bringing your exes into this. I'm sorry for everything."

You looked down at him, your free hand coming to play with the hairs that grew around his ears. His hair was longer than you'd ever seen it and you smiled as he seemed to lean into your hand.

Jungkook finished adjusting the cuff and looked up at you. "I think Yoongi's room is empty. He didn't want people in there, but I bet he won't mind if it's us."

You nodded and followed closely behind Jungkook as you walked through the crowd to Yoongi's bedroom. It--like Jungkook had said--was empty. The two of you flopped down on the bed and despite laying a foot apart your fingers continued to brush against each other as you adjusted your wrists in the cuffs.

"I can't figure out why Jin handcuffed us," Jungkook said. The music was just a series of thumps now and even though it was still loud, you could no longer make out the lyrics and could hear Jungkook's voice without him having to raise it. "I thought he wouldn't want us to hang out anymore."

"What?" you asked. "Why would Jin care if we hang out?"

Jungkook turned and looked at you. His hair was wet from sweat and his hair curled in thick tendrils over his forehead. "Aren't you and Jin dating?"

"What? No! Jin and I are just friends. What makes you think that?"

"Jin told me he was gonna confess to you at your party."

Jungkook pulled his gaze from you and focused up at the ceiling. You thought back on that night. Jin had been acting more generous and gentlemanly that night, but you just chalked it up to it being your birthday.

"I didn't even know he liked me. Is that why you've been avoiding me? You thought I was with Jin and you didn't want to interfere?"

"That's part of it."

"What's the other part of it?"

His eyes came back to yours and you felt his fingers brushing against yours. But, it wasn't just the millisecond brushes as he adjusted. No, his fingers were practically intertwined with yours.

"Y/N, we've been friends so long...I don't want to ruin it..."

"Jungkook, it's already ruined."

There was a long tense silence between the of you. His fingers fully intertwined with yours. It was far from the first time you'd held his hand, but it felt different. It was softer, yet more intense at the same time. As if your hand were porcelain that could break at even the slightest touch.

Jungkook moved so quickly that you have no idea how he came to hover above you. His free arm resting above his head and the one handcuffed to you still intertwined with yours to the side. "What would've happened if Jin had confessed to you?"

"Kookie?"

"What would've happened?"

"I-I would've turned him down."

"Why?"

"Cause I'm in love with someone else."

His lips were on your before you even finished the sentence. He was gentle but urgent as if he'd been waiting two thousand years to kiss you.

"I'm still mad at you for skipping my birthday party," you said when he pulled away. "I don't care if you're in love with me, your cute ass still has a lot of making up to do."

Jungkook smiled as he leaned down placed a small kiss on your neck. "Well, I never got to give you my gift."

He reached into his back pocket and pulled out two tickets. You grabbed them from his hands and you smiled as you realized it was for the musical you'd been dying to see.

"It's tomorrow," he said. "Pretty good first date, yeah?"

"Hey, don't get cocky yet!" It was hard for you to hide your smile and you didn't want to give him the satisfaction, so, you just leaned up and kissed him.

vVv

You woke up the next morning enveloped in Jungkook's arms and his one-armed flannel. You looked up to see him scrolled through his phone, but when you squirmed, he looked down at you.

"Good morning, baby," he said.

"That sounds so weird."

"What, baby?" He smirked and giggled as you reached up and playfully hit his shoulder.

"Wait," you said, looking at your unbound wrist. You looked down and found the handcuffs on the bed. "They must've uncuffed us last night."

"I hadn't even realized," he said. A blush appeared on his face. "I didn't want to let go of your hand."

"Aww," you said, reaching up and ruffling his hair. "You're such a softie."

Jungkook smirked and grabbed your wrists. "Hey, I'm not completely a softie."

He held your wrists and glanced down at the handcuffs. "Maybe, we should keep these."

[libraryofloveletters]

Frank Angst FPF! Being Frank long lost high school lover and never seeing him again since high school. You then find out he is alive after he murdered someone close to you

tw: murder and blood // I was so excited when this came in!! 

--- 

Your husband hasn't answered your call which was strange to say the least. He texted asking if you could pick dinner up on your way home from work as he was working late and wouldn't be able to cook. You thought nothing of it, it was normal for him to work late.

Once, twice and now a third time your call has gone to voicemail. You decide to cave and just get a pizza before heading home. 

The front door was locked when you got home, all the lights downstairs were off. The lock clicked as you shut the door, setting your keys on the coffee table. 

“Honey, I'm home!” you chuckle to yourself at the cliche greeting, making your way into the darkness of the kitchen, setting the box on the counter. 

It was too silent in the house, eerily quiet and a cold feeling makes its way down your spine. “James?!” you shout from the kitchen. Maybe he just fell asleep or he had to step out for a moment - but his car was in the driveway. 

There’s a thud from upstairs. 

“James?!” you shout for him once more before quietly making your way to the staircase. You peer from one side of the staircase, it seemed to be empty upstairs. 

Stupidly, you head up the stairs. James’s study door was open but he wasn't in there nor was he in the bathroom. 

That left your bedroom. 

Pushing the door open, you can see a large dark spot on the carpet in the bedroom. The moonlight was peeking through the pulled curtains, what looked like a person laying on the carpet caught your attention. 

Before you could reach for the light switch, a hand covered your mouth and there's someone pressed against your back. You struggled as they shifted you into the room, kicking the door shut. 

Your own hand wrapped around the person’s forearm, your fingers grazed a scar. Somehow it felt familiar, as if you had seen and touched it before. Your brain was screaming run! in big red letters but your heart was telling you to stop fighting. 

The person behind you noticed that you relaxed against them, your hand dropping from theirs. They let you go, you take a step back and reach for the light switch. 

When the lights come on, there’s splatters of red on the wall, the bright red screaming in comparison of the pale white walls. 

The body on the floor - your husband, James. 

You wanted to scream and run to him but you were frozen in your spot. Instead you look towards the person who had just forced you into the room and your heart dropped to your stomach. 

He looked older, worn out but still as handsome as he was the day you had met him. 

Frank Castle stood across from you. 

In your house, in your bedroom, covered in your husband’s blood after 15 years - 15 years since you last saw him and a year and half since you saw the headlines slapped across every news platform: “Frank Castle Dead.” 

Do you talk to him? Should you scream ? Should you run into Frank’s arms? So many feelings and not enough time nor words. 

“You- I thought.. Frank.” you exhale a shaky breath, your eyes welling up with tears. 

“I didn’t know he was your husband.” Frank takes a step towards you but you step back, your back hitting the wall. 

“Go.” you wipe the falling tears. “Get out before the cops get here.” you can hear the sirens in the distance. You had no idea if they were even coming to your neighbourhood. 

“I ain't scared of the cops, doll.” your heart fluttered at the word, no one had called you that in 15 years. 

“You killed my husband, Frank.” you look at the man. “You’re supposed to be dead. So please, go and stay dead. That way I at least have you.” 

You had no idea what you were saying, maybe it was the shock of things. 

You couldn’t be with Frank, he just killed your husband. 

[haikyu-boys-am-i-right]

Guardian angel

Character: Bokuto- aged up haikyu set after high school

Warnings: ANGST, ANGST, and more ANGST! TW death, TW cancer, major character death

Requested: no

Summary: Yn Akaashi is the twin sister of Akaashi Keiji and when the guy she is in love with gets cancer she vows to stay by his side in sickness and in health till death do they part.

Word Count: 9,277

Note: A song that sets the mood for this story is If only tears could bring you back to me by midnight sons. I literally had a dream of this and I wrote this and I am saying sorry in advance.

Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated but please don’t repost my works.

Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyuu or any of the characters. 

———————————————————————

One night while yn is visiting akaashi, He gets a call from bokuto while they are eating dinner. “Hey Bokuto what's up you don't usually call like this' ', akaashi says. Yn looks over at him from where she is eating her dinner, curious as to why bokuto is calling as well. “Tell him that said hi '' yn says as she takes a bite of her dinner. “Yn says hi '' Akaashi says. “He says hi back”, Akaashi says. “You sound worried bokuto, what's wrong?'' Akaashi asks. Akaashi’s eyes widened. “Wait what, yeah we can come over what day and time? This weekend? Okay, yeah i'll bring yn over to your house with me thanks for letting me know ''. 

Akaashi hangs up the phone and sighs grimly. “Hey keiji what's up, is everything okay with Bokuto”, yn asks. Akaashi clenches his fist. “Bokuto just told me that he has to go to the hospital this week to get some test results in”. “Oh what for” yn asks. “Well It seems that the doctor that he sees thinks that bokuto could have cancer”. Yn drops her chopsticks in shock. “Wait what”, she whispers. “Is he okay”? Akaashi shrugs his shoulders and yn can tell that he is worried about Bokuto as well. “He said that he hasn't been feeling well lately and he wants us to stop by this weekend and he will tell us the results”. Yn nods. “Okay yeah I’ll definitely go with you”, yn says as worry starts to grow in her mind. Akaashi sighs. “All we can do is give him support and hope that he doesn't have cancer”. “I hope he doesn't”, yn whispers. Akaashi sighs. “I hope he doesn't have it either”. 

That weekend yn and akaashi head over to Bokuto’s house to see what the results of the tests he had done are. “Do you think he is going to be okay, yn asks worriedly. Akaashi wraps an arm around her shoulder and he squeezes it gently. “Hey everything is going to be okay'' he says trying to give her a smile while the feeling of worry in his gut just won't go away. “I'm sure bokuto is fine,” Akaashi says as he goes to ring the doorbell.

They wait on the front porch for a few minutes and Bokuto is the one who answers the door. Bokuto, how is everything, are you okay,” yn asks while she goes to hug him. She feels bokuto tense up but as she pulls away he has a smile on his face. “I'm fine yn”, he says ruffling her hair causing her to huff in annoyance. “There's no need for you to worry, yn”. “That's a relief”, yn says going to hug him tightly again. “So do you wanna play some video games then, Akaashi,” bokuto asks, nodding back to his house. Akaashi nods as they head inside. “Of course but I'm going to beat you,'' he says nonchalantly. “Yeah there is no way that is happening,'' Bokuto says with a chuckle.

They head to bokuto’s bedroom and yn sits on his bed while bokuto and Akaashi sit on the floor so they can see the television a little easier. Yn casually watches the two play some sort of co-op shooting game while she surfs the internet on her phone. 

Suddenly Yn gets a text message alert from kuroo. She opens the text to see what he needs and her eyes widen as reads the text. Hey yn akaashi-san, i'm sure bokuto won't tell you because he told me not to say anything but his test results he got back were bad and he starts chemotherapy next week he didn't want to tell you or your brother because he didn't want you two to worry. Yn gasps, slapping a hand over her mouth and Akaashi and bokuto turn to look at her curiously. Yn fakes a cough. “Sorry i think i inhaled some dust and i need a drink” she says trying not to show that she knows anything. “I’ll go get some for all of us,'' Akaashi says as he leaves the room.

Yn bites her lip and bokuto looks at her strangely. “Yn what's wrong you look upset” he asks. “You idiot,'' she sobs, drawing her knees up to her chest. “How could you keep that from us, your closest friends”, she sobs. “Hey what's going on” bokuto asks, alarmed as he gets up from the bedroom floor and sits by her on the bed. “Koutarou you idiot,'' she sobs as she hugs him. “You called me by my first name so this must be serious,'' he whispers, hugging her back. “How could you not tell us that you are sick you idiot”, she sobs clutching onto his shirt tightly. Bokuto freezes. “Who told you”, he whispers, sounding sad and almost broken. “Kuroo-san texted me”, she says as she doesn't let go of him. “Damn” he mutters. “He should not have said anything”. “Why not?” Yn asks, pulling back to look at him. Bokuto sighs and he looks like he might cry. “I didn't tell you because I want you to be happy and I know that you would probably pity me if you knew”. “I could never pity you koutarou”, yn says as she gulps trying to hold back her tears. “There's something I need to tell you as well”. “What's that?'' he whispers absentmindedly. “Well here goes nothing”, she says. Koutarou I'm in love with you and I have been for a long time probably since my brother introduced us during our first year of high school, but I've always been too scared to tell you. 

Bokuto freezes as he looks like he might cry. “I've loved you too yn”, he says as his voice starts to crack. “That's the main reason I didn't want to tell you about my sickness because I knew if I did then you might not treat me the same and if we fell in love it would break your heart if i died”. “I don't care, I want to be by your side, koutarou”, yn says, shaking her head as she goes back to hugging him again. “You deserve love and support and the cancer should not interfere with that”. Bokuto sighs as he kisses her forehead. “Are you sure you want to be my girlfriend?'' he whispers, his voice wavering. “Yes of course I do”, she says. “Okay”, Bokuto whispers, pulling back out of the hug and she gasps as he cups her cheeks and he kisses her gently, the taste of their tears in the kiss. 

The feeling is bittersweet because she knows how much emotion bokuto is hiding behind the kiss. They pull apart and bokuto leans back against the wall while sitting on his bed and he pulls yn into his arms so her back is against his chest. “I never want to let you go”, he whispers, kissing the back of her head softly before resting his head in the crook of her neck. “I know I don’t want to let you go either”, she whispers. I do want you to know that I will be there at the hospital with you every time you have to get chemo alright”, she asks. “I don't want you to see me like that,'' he says as he sobs harder, causing tears to drip down and wet the back of her shirt. “You need support,” she says. “Besides, I'm not letting my boyfriend fight cancer alone”. “Okay,'' he whispers, still holding her close to him in his arms. “Are you going to tell Keiji”, yn asks. She feels Bokuto nod against her neck. “Yeah I guess I better”, he whispers as they both fall silent. 

“Hey I'm back sorry it took me a while to find the drinks because it seems your parents moved where they keep the sodas but i got one for you, me, and Yn, Bokuto”, akaashi says as he steps into the room but he stops as he soon as he sees bokuto holding yn close to him and can tell that the air of the room has turned sad or tense. “Hey what's up, are you two okay?'' he asks. “What's going on”? Bokuto bites his lip. “Do you want me to tell him for you koutarou?”yn asks, rubbing his arm gently. Bokuto nods as tears fill his eyes and he is unable to speak. “Is he okay and why did you call him by his first name you never have before”, Akaashi asks, growing more and more confused. Yn sighs. “Koutarou was lying when he said his test results came back as okay, Keiji, kuroo told me and i asked bokuto about it”, yn says. Oh Keiji, koutarou has cancer”. 

Akaashi freezes as he almost drops the drinks in shock. “Wait, are being you serious right now?'' he whispers and you can see the worry evident in his eyes as he turns to look at Bokuto. “Bokuto, why didn't you tell us”? Bokuto hangs his head and Yn continues to speak to Akaashi for him. “He didn't want us to pity him even though I could never do that”, yn says, turning around and leaning back so that she can kiss bokuto’s cheek. “What's with that, that's a new development”, Akaashi asks, his eyes widening at the sight of his sister kissing bokuto. “I finally confessed to him”, yn says as her cheeks turn a tint of pink. “I told him about how I've had a crush on him for a long time and I still want him in my life”. “I fell in love with yn a long time ago but you know that Akaashi '', Bokuto whispers as he holds her close to him. “I am glad that you two finally told each other how you two feel but the thing is”, Akaashi says as he sighs heavily. “I'm happy for you two but I wish this could have been under better circumstances”. “I know” yn says as all three of them fall silent unsure what to say. “So can we play some more video games before you two have to go, '' Bokuto asks, trying to ease the uncomfortable feeling in the room. “Of course,” Akaashi says, going to sit back down on the floor and he presses a button on his controller to unpause the game. “I'm going to sit back down on the floor so that I can get a better view of the tv alright yn”, bokuto asks. “Sure”, she whispers, letting him up from behind her. 

While Akaashi and bokuto continue to play video games, yn lays on her stomach on the bed and she watches the two play the game completely engrossed in the mission and she plays with bokuto’s hair. He snorts and she smiles. “Are you ticklish koutarou?'' she whispers, running her fingers through his hair again. “Yeah I am” he whispers, trying not to laugh. She kisses the top of his head and he laughs out loud. “Hey that's not fair you are making it worse and I can’t concentrate on the game,'' he says. “Aww does koutarou not want my affection?'' she asks as she goes to pull away. “Hey wait a minute yes i do”, he says whipping around and yn gasps as he kisses her. “Um hey could you two not make out while i'm in the room”, akaashi says with a groan causing yn and bokuto to laugh. 

“I guess we better be heading on home now, bokuto”, Akaashi says as they finish up the mission and he gets up out of the floor, stretching as he stands up. Akaashi turns to yn and he chuckles lightly when he sees that she has fallen asleep on bokuto's bed. Bokuto sighs looking at her sadly and then he looks back over at Akaashi and Akasshi’s heart tightens at the pained look on Bokuto’s face. “Take care of her for me alright Akaashi”, bokuto asks. “What does that mean”, Akaashi asks with a frown as he crosses his arms. Bokuto sighs and clenches his fist as even just trying to tell akaashi about what he wanted to say was hurting him more than anything else had before. “It means if I die she is going to need someone to watch over her and I want to make sure that she is safe and taken care of”. “Hey you are going to make it alright i won't approve of anyone else dating my sister”, Akaashi says. “I just don’t want to get her hopes up”, bokuto whispers, looking like he might cry again. “Hey you'll be there I am sure of it,'' Akaashi says, patting Bokuto on the back. “I hope so, I love her too much to see her heart break like this”, Bokuto whispers as he kisses her forehead. “If I do die, akaashi, I promise that I'll be her guardian angel”, he says. “You will do better than that, bokuto” akaashi says. “You'll be there by her side to protect her”. “I hope so”, bokuto whispers ruffling yn’s hair gently. “I hope I can give her a lifetime of happiness but I know I won’t live to see that”. 

He reaches over and pulls a jacket from off of his bedside table and then he turns back to Akashi. “Here, give her this, I want her to hold onto it for me” bokuto says, handing Akaashi his fukurodani volleyball club jacket. “I can’t play volleyball anymore anyway because of how weak the chemo will make me so I want her to have this”. “Okay I will give it to her '', Akaashi whispers, trying not to cry himself as he goes to wake Yn up so that they can head home. 

About a week later it is time to head to the cancer clinic for bokuto’s first chemo treatment. Yn is there beside him for support as they walk up to the hospital. Yn squeezes his hand gently as she feels his grip tighten on her hand. “I don't know if I can do this”, Bokuto says as a tear runs down his cheek. “I'll be there with you the entire time”, yn says. Do you promise he asks nervously and yn’s heart clenches as she hears his normally loud and boisterous voice sound so small and scared. “Of course I won't leave your side even for a moment”. Bokuto smirks. “Even if you have to use the bathroom”, Bokuto asks her with a chuckle. Yn laughs. “Okay fine, I would leave your side if i have to go to the bathroom but that's it you're stuck with me koutarou and I want you to know that” she says. “I’m grateful for it,'' Bokuto says, squeezing her hand once more as they walk into the cancer clinic. 

Bokuto is taken to the back shortly after checking in at the front desk and yn heads to the back along with him, keeping her promise to stay by his side. “For your first treatment you will be given a small round of chemo,'' the nurse says as she leads yn and bokuto to a room. “How long will the treatment last?”, bokuto asks as he looks nervously at the bag of chemotherapy treatment that is hanging from the IV pole. “The drip will last about an hour as it will take that long for the medicine to enter your system”, the nurse says as she goes to get the things needed to give bokuto the iv. Bokuto pales when he sees the needle in the nurse's hand when she returns. “Yn can you hold my hand”, he asks looking up at her with his bottom lip sticking out. Yn’s eyes soften. “Of course I'll hold your hand koutarou”, she says sitting in the chair by the bed and Bokuto grips her hand tightly but not too tightly as the nurse heads back over to them. “This may sting a bit,'' the nurse says after wiping down the area of his arm where she is going to give him the iv. Bokuto winces but he doesn't yell out in pain and yn leans over to kiss his cheek. “You're doing so good koutarou”, she says. Bokuto gives her a pained and nervous smile as the nurse finishes up putting in the iv and she hooks up the tube to the iv sight and the medicine starts to drip down and enter Bokuto’s arm. “Alright I'm all done”, she says, putting away the used needle in the disposal bin and throwing away her pair of blue disposable gloves. “I'm going to come back and check on you in half an hour alright”, she says. “Thank you”, bokuto says, laying back on the pillows on the bed as the nurse leaves the room, closing the door behind her.

“Let’s watch some tv that will keep your mind off of the treatment”, yn says as she finds the tv remote and she switches the tv on. They flip through the multiple television channels trying to find something to watch when they find some old movies to watch and this helps them to pass the time quickly as they quote the more famous movies and they joke about old graphics, how exaggerated expressions seemed to be, and how bad the cheesy acting was.. 

The nurse comes back in a little while later and she smiles softly as she sees that both bokuto and yn have fallen fast asleep with their hands still interlocked between them. “Excuse me,'' she says as even though she feels bad about it, she has to wake them up seeing as Bokuto’s treatment has finished being administered. :The treatment is done so it is time to discharge you”, she says as yn and bokuto open their eyes. “That was fast,'' Bokuto says and he winces as he feels stiff and sore all over. “What's wrong koutarou”, yn asks, placing a hand on his arm. “My muscles are really sore”, he says as he tries to stretch and he winces. “That's quite a normal side effect of the chemo,'' the nurse says with a nod. “He will be okay right ma’am”, yn asks, looking worriedly over at bokuto and back up at the nurse. The nurse nods as she pats yn’s shoulder as she tries to reassure her. “Yes he should be fine”, the nurse says and then she turns to Bokuto. “You are good to go for today but please feel free to call us if any side effects persist or worsen”, she says handing him a discharge packet. 

After Bokuto has been discharged and he puts on a mask that will help to keep germs from getting into his weakened immune system, yn leads him over to the hospital gift shop. “What are we doing in here?'' Bokuto asks her as she gently squeezes his hand again as she leads him inside the store. “I wanted to get you something for getting through your first chemo treatment,'' she says and her eyes light up when she spots the perfect stuffed animal to get for him. A grey stuffed owl with white tips on its head sits on a nearby shelf. “This is perfect”, yn says, picking up the stuffed animal and she turns around so she can show it to bokuto. “Oh and why is it perfect? '' Bokuto asks, cocking an eyebrow to show that he is confused. 

Yn smirks teasingly at him. “Well because fukurodani’s mascot was an owl, you played on the team while in high school, and you have white tips in your hair just like this little owl does”. Bokuto grins so wide that yn can tell that he is smiling behind his mask. “Okay you got me there”, he says chuckling as they walk up to the checkout counter. “I'll take good care of him, I promise,'' Bokuto says as he takes the owl from yn and holds it close to him after they have paid for it. “It's the first gift that you have gotten me after all” he says snuggling the owl close to his cheek. “Are you going to name it” yn asks. “Of course” bokuto says as his eyes light up. “His name is going to be spiker,” Bokuto says proudly. “You named him after a volleyball move” yn asks, trying not to giggle at how cute her boyfriend is. “Yes”, Bokuto says defensively as he pouts at yn’s giggles. “Is there something wrong with that”? Yn shakes her head. “Not at all because that's definitely something you would do and I want you to know that I love you”. Bokuto grins as he hugs the owl tightly to his chest. “I love you too yn”. 

A few months later while they are out on a dinner date, bokuto keeps glancing at her and away from her over and over all throughout dinner and yn starts to get confused at the shy and worried look he seems to have on his face. “What is it” yn asks as she puts a hand on her cheek. “Do I have something on my face, kou”? Bokuto shakes his head and looks at her with pure adoration in his eyes. “No but I wanted to ask you something but I am really nervous to do it,'' he says. “Okay so what did you want to ask me, you know you can tell me anything”,yn asks putting her utensils down so she can give him her full attention and she goes to take a sip of her drink. “Will you move in with me”, Bokuto asks her suddenly, his cheeks turning a bright shade of red and he sighs with relief after finally getting the question out there. Yn gasps as she almost drops her drink. “You want me to move in with you”? Bokuto nods as his cheeks heat up even more  in embarrassment. “Yn I don't know how much time I have left or if I will live for another forty or fifty years but what I do know is that I love you and want you by my side so will you move in with me and be by my side each day”? Yn smiles and she feels like she might cry at the sweet gesture. “Oh bokuto of course i'll move in with you”, yn says as she gets up out of her chair and she walks around the table to hug him. “I'll never be lonely with you by my side”, Bokuto says as he hugs her again. 

Over the next few treatments Bokuto begins to lose his hair and he becomes very self conscious of it. “I miss my hair,'' he whispers one day as yn helps him to tie a brightly colored bandana around his head. “I know” she whispers as she kisses his cheek. “Do you still love me even though I am no longer handsome”, he whispers looking sadly at her. Yn’s heart clenches at the hurt look in his eyes. He had become oh so frail after his last treatment seeing as the doctor had to up the dose of his chemo treatment and yn was starting to worry about him even more than she had before. “Hey you are still just as handsome and hot as the day we first met and of course I still love you Kou, I always will because you're the sunshine in my life, you know that right”? Bokuto grins and he turns to hug her. “You're the best girlfriend ever”, he says. Yn smiles as she hugs him back even though her heart is breaking. “No, you're the best boyfriend, silly” she says. “Now why don't we go watch a movie before we have to go to the next treatment in a bit alright” she says. “Okay” he says smiling as he heads to the living room. Yn heads to the bathroom. “I'll be there in a minute, okay kou” she says. “Okay  babe”, he says. “I will be picking out the movie while you are in there then” he says as he sits down on the couch and he turns on the tv. 

Yn goes into the bathroom and she closes the door behind her. She sits down on the toilet and the dam breaks as she finally lets her tears flow as she sobs harder than she ever has in her entire life. She keeps a hand over her mouth so Bokuto doesn't hear her because she doesn't want him seeing her so upset as he was having a hard time as it is and she cries her heart out hoping and wishing that the chemo treatments will help him soon and she hopes that bokuto will no longer have to suffer each day. 

One day while yn is helping bouto to clean around the house she finds a small black box on their bedside table. “Koutarou what is this over here”, she asks, holding the box up in her hand as she turns to face Bokuto. Bokuto’s face and ears turn bright red as he realizes what box she is holding in her hand. “Oh um that was supposed to be a surprise for me to give you later but you can go ahead and open it” he says. Curiously yn open the box and she gasps once she sees what is inside it. On the little cushion in the box is a small antique looking wedding ring. “Bokuto, is this what i think it is”, she whispers looking up at him lovingly. “Yeah”, he says sadly while he rubs the back of his head. “I was thinking of giving it to you but i was worried about whether it was too soon to asks you and then i thought well i probably don't have much time left anyway and so i asked my mom if i could give you my grandma’s wedding ring and she said yes so um yn Akaashi will you marry me”, he asks. “Yes” yn whispers. “Oh koutarou, yes of course i will marry you”. Bokuto grins widely as he starts to cry. “Okay yeah”, he says, taking the box from her. He takes the ring out of the box and with a shaking hand he takes her hand in his and he slips the ring onto her ring finger. “I love you koutarou”, she says as she goes to hug him. “No matter what life throws at us I will always love you”. Bokuto hugs her back. “I love you too yn i just hope that we have a lot more time to spend together”. 

As yn pulls out of the hug she goes over to her purse and she pulls out a similar looking box. “What is that?'' Bokuto asks. Yn smiles with happy tears in her eyes as she opens the box and she pulls a wedding band ring out of it. “This was my grandpa’s wedding ring and I asked my parents if I could give it to you”. “I was actually going to ask you when we went out to dinner tonight”. Bokuto laughs. “That is when I was going to ask you but the surprise was spoiled before I could ask you”. Yn smiles as she slips the ring onto Bokluto’s finger which fits perfectly and he cups her cheek as he leans in to kiss her.

A year later and it is time for Bokuto’s appointment with his cancer doctor and the doctor will tell them if the treatments have been working to help fight the cancer within Bokuto or not. “I'm nervous yn”, bokuto says as yn grips his hand in hers while they sit out in the waiting room. “Don’t worry kou i'm sure the doctor will have some good news seeing as you seem to be feeling better lately”, she says. “You're right”, he whispers as he kisses her temple and he fiddles with the ring on her finger trying to keep his mind on something happy as they had started planning their wedding a short while ago. 

They are called to the back and the nurse finishes checking him in. “So is this your girlfriend then sir”, nurse asks him. Bokuto nods proudly as he squeezes Yn’s hand. “Well actually she is my fiance”. Yn blushes. “I'm still not used to being called that even though we have been engaged for a year because it just doesn't seem real that I am engaged to the man that I have been in love with for years”, she says with a chuckle. The nurse smiles at them softly. “Well the doctor should be in here shortly seeing as there isn't too much of a wait today”, the nurse says as she leaves the room. 

The doctor comes into the room shortly after just as the nurse said he would. He picks up a chart from the counter and he turns to yn and Bokuto “Hello, you are koutarou bokuto, am I correct”? “Yes, I am,” bokuto says. The doctor sighs as a grim look crosses his face but the look is gone shortly after so yn thinks she must have been imagining things. “Well”, the doctor says, clearing his throat. “I need to speak with your fiance in the hallway if that is alright, there was some paperwork I have a question on ''. “Oh sure”, bokuto says as he lets go of Yn’s hand. He then kisses her cheek before she goes out into the hall. “I'll be back soon, kou”, she says. “Okay hurry back I miss you already”, he says, giving her a smile and a wink. Yn smiles and nods. “Don't worry kou, I will”.

“So what did you want to talk to me about sir”?,  Yn asks as she closes the door to the room behind her. The doctor sighs and he shakes his head sadly as he holds up Bokuto’s chart. “You two came in  today for his checkup to see if the chemo is working, am I correct”? “Yes that's right”, yn says crossing her arms. “Is there something wrong, doctor, did the test results not come in yet”? The doctor sighs and shakes his head again. “That's just it the results are in but they probably aren't what you want to hear” the doctor says with a heavy sigh. Yn gasps as her hand goes to cover her mouth. “Wait hold on, are you actually saying that the chemo didn't help him”? The doctor nods as his hold on the chart tightens. “ I always hate having to be the one to tell my patients this, but It seems that the cancer is of the more severe and aggressive type and he will have to go through another round of chemo but it will be a more strenuous type”. “It will take more of a toll on his body than the last round did won’t it”, yn whispers. The doctor nods. “I'm so sorry ma’am, do you want to break the news to him or should i do it”? “I'll try to” yn whispers, her mind in a daze. “I'll go in the room with you as support, I am truly sorry miss”, the doctor says. “'m sorry that you have to tell him this sort of news in any way shape or form” “I just hope this doesn't break him”, she whispers. “He's had such a strong smile on his face throughout his treatments and this may be the last straw”. The doctor nods as he follows her back into the room.

“Hey, hey, hey yn what questions did they have about my paperwork”, bokuto asks her but the smile on his face dies when he sees the pure and utterly defeated look on her face. ?”Yn what's wrong did something happen”, he whispers. Yn bites her lip as she runs over to hug him. “Koutarou”, she sobs, holding tightly onto him. “Oh Kou”, she sobs. “Yn what’s wrong”, he whispers,his voice trembling as he pets the back of her hair. “The test results” she sobs as that is all she can ammage to say. Bokuto freezes as he realizes what she is trying to tell him. “The results are bad aren’t they”, he whispers, his voice wavering. 

Yn nods and she feels Bokuto start to shake and cry along with her. “Why couldn't you have fallen in love with someone healthy?'' he sobs, burying his face in her hair. “I don't want anyone else, you idiot,'' she says. “I'm broken and you deserve someone better, someone that can promise you a full life of happiness”, he says. “You aren’t broken and don't you ever say that”, yn says. “You have all of my heart and you always will, you are stuck with me remember”? Yeah bokuto whispers holding tightly onto yn. I remember. They stay like that for a long while till they can stop crying and the doctor tells bokuto about his next round of chemo. “Tell it to me straight, doctor,” bokuto says. “How long do you think that I have left to live”? The doctor sighs. “I would say anywhere from a year to two years”. “Then let's make the most of this next year koutarou”, Yn says. “Okay”, bokuto whispers. “Let’s live every moment together because who knows what moment will end up being my last”.

The walk out of the hospital is quiet and yn doesn't know what to say or if she can say anything that will actually make Bokuto feel any better. Suddenly she stops as she has an idea that races through her mind. “Hey kou i have an idea she she lacing her hand tightly with his. “Oh yeah, what’s that?'' he asks, looking at her sadly. “Let's not wait and get married now,'' she says. Bokuto stops walking as he looks down at her. “Wait now”, he asks, looking at her. Yn nods. “Yes because I want you to be absolutely sure that I will be right here with you for whatever time we have left together and I think getting married would be a good way to do that” she says. “Are you sure about this yn, because if I die you'll be known as a widow”, he says sadly. Yn shakes her head. “I don't care and besides no other guy can fill the place you already have in my heart alright”? Bokuto nods as he leans down to kiss her. “Okay then let's get married” he says as they head out to their car so they can drive over to the courthouse so they can get married. 

They arrive shortly after at the courthouse and Bokuto holds her hand while they walk the entire way up the stairs and inside the courthouse. “Are you sure that you want to do this here and now”? he asks her once more as he sighs worriedly. “I know you wanted to have our friends and family at our wedding ceremony and this is probably not the ceremony that you imagined having” Yn sighs as she squeezes his hand to try and reassure him. “I think this type of ceremony feels more intimate and special if it's just the two of us kou and besides the only person i need here is you after all” yn says. Bokuto chuckles as he raises her hand to his lips and he kisses the back of her knuckles. “Okay,'' he says. “You are the only one I need as well so let’s do this”, he says as they head inside.

After waiting for a little while the judge called them in for the ceremony. Akaashi had come down to the courthouse to serve as the witness of the ceremony. “Is everyone ready”, the judge asks, looking back and forth between yn and bokuto. “Yes we are ready”, Bokuto says as he and yn stand in front of the judge. “Alright then let's begin, '' the judge says as he clears his throat. “So do you koutarou bokuto take yn Akaashi to be your lawfully wedded wife to have and to hold from this day forward, for better and for worse, in sickness and in health till death do you two part”? the judge asks him. “I do”, bokuto says, trying not to cry as his throat thickens after he hears the death do us part line. “Alright then”, the judge says with a warm smile and then he turns to face yn. “Yn Akaashi, do you take koutarou bokuto to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold from this day forward, for better and for worse, in sickness and in health till death do you part”? “I do”, she says sniffling as she smiles happily and she turns back to face bokuto and they both have tears in their eyes and Yn hears akaashi sniffle behind her. “Well then with the power vested in me I pronounce you husband and wife, you are now known as Mr and Mrs Bokuto and you may now kiss the bride”. Yn and bokuto step forward and they embrace each other as they kiss as the judge and Akaashi clap behind them. They want this one moment to last forever and yn wishes that they could be frozen in time because she knows this happy moment won't last forever.

Yn is right about her hunch because the happy moments are gone about a year after their wedding as bokuto’s condition seems to worsen and it has gotten to the point where he doesn't seem to have much of a will left to live and he would tell yn that his love for her was what was keeping him alive at this point. Bokuto now has to permanently stay in the hospital due to how weak his immune system is and yn is there with him in his room at any moment that she can be, whenever she does not have to work she is there by his side because she is afraid of not being there when he does eventually pass away. 

Yn sighed as she left the house to go and visit bokuto for her daily visit. She looked up at the grey sky and sighed wistfully as she watched the first snowflakes of the christmas season fall around her and land on her jacket and mittens and the snow ends up dusting her hair as well. “He loves the snow” she whispers and she is hoping that he can see the snow from his hospital room window. The ride to the hospital is always quiet and yn misses when she and bokuto could drive for hours through the city and back roads having adventures so that each moment was a journey they wanted to remember.

“Hello miss bokuto good morning”, one of the nurses says as she walks past the nurses station and she heads into the hospice ward where Bokuto’s room is. “Hello head nurse”, yn says. “How is he today?” she asks, looking down the hall towards Bokuto’s room. “He seems to be stable today, no more pains that I know of” the nurse says. “Thank you all so much for taking care of him”, yn says. The nurse smiles. “Well you should give yourself some credit as well you are such a loving wife being by his side most of the time”, the nurse says. “He needs me and I need him” yn whispers, shaking her head to try and clear her eyes of tears as she did not want Bokuto to see her cry. “I want to spend as many moments as I can with him whether they are good or bad,” she says as she walks down the rest of the hall towards Bokuto’s room. 

Yn enters Bokuto’s hospital room, closing the door quietly behind her and she smiles as she sees that he is finally resting peacefully today, with striker the owl tucked into his arms. She pulls back the curtains on the window and she smiles wistfully as she watches the snow cover the ground while she waits for Bokuto to wake up from his nap.

“Is that snow falling out there”, yn hears a croaking voice ask from behind her. Yn smiles as she walks back over to bokuto’s bed to see him smiling up at her even though it is hard for him to smile with the oxygen piece placed in his nose. “Yeah it is snowing, it's so cold out there too”,she says shivering as she tucks her hands into the pockets of the now worn out fukurodani jacket. She had worn it to the hospital so many times that the name had faded on the back of it but she wore it anytime that she couldn't be around bokuto. “I bet the view of the snow is prettier from the outside of this place”, he says in a low voice. Yn shakes her head. “Nah it's just wet and gets everywhere but i'm glad that we can watch the snowfall together in this room”. “I'm glad as well” bokuto says and he coughs and winces as he lays back on the pillow. Yn frowns seeing as the cough did not sound good to her. “Have you been in much pain today kou”?, she asks, taking his hand in hers. 

Bokuto shrugs and coughs even harder than before. “I have had a bit of pain but it seems that the pain medicine is helping me”. “That's good,'' she whispers as she kisses his forehead and he sighs happily and closes his eyes. “What's the date?'' he asks looking back up at her. “All of the days seem to run together while I am stuck in here”. “It's December twenty fourth”, she whispers. “Wow it's christmas already,'' he says, shaking his head. “You know I was working on a present for you at home and I hope you find where I hid it at some point so you can tell me how you like it”. “Can you tell me where it is, kou?”, she asks. He shakes his head and grins a mischievous grin. “No way honey, I'm not done with it, so you can’t see it till I’m finished with it”. “I got you something as well sunshine”, yn says smiling as she gets up from her chair and walks over to her large bag that she had brought with her. 

“What is it”, bokuto asks, perking up a bit as he tries to sit up in the bed but he sighs and lays back defeated on the pillows seeing as he can’t sit up by himself as he doesn't have the energy. “It's a surprise” yn says winking as she helps to raise the top part of the bed so he can sit up in the bed and she hands him the bag. “I was visiting my parents house recently and I found something that won't wilt like regular flowers would”. Confused, Bokuto opens the bag, pulls out a large amount of tissue paper, and his eyes widen when he pulls out a handful of carefully crafted hand folded paper carnations. “These are beautiful babe”, he whispers, cradling all of them gently in his hands as he looks up at her. “Did you make all of these yn”, he asks. Yn nods and she blushes as she rubs the back of her neck. “Actually I made these back when we were in our first year of high school, and yes it was shortly after we met, you see I wanted to confess to you back then but I didn't know how to, so I had the idea to write what I liked about you on the papers flowers and then I ended up getting too embarrassed to even give them to you. 

“Can I read them now”? Bokuto asks her. “Of course you can”, yn says smiling at him. “That's why I gave them to you after all”. “I love your smile”, bokuto whispers and tears come to his eyes as he reads the first flower. “I love your hugs and how you always have so much energy. I love how you can instantly make me feel better just by being with me. I love your passion for whatever you set your mind to”. He opens up the last one and tears come to his eyes as he reads it. “Bokuto koutarou i love everything about you and I hope you return my love sincerely, Yn Akaashi”. “Do you like it”, yn whispers nervously. “This is an amazing gift, of course I love it, now can I kiss you”, bokuto asks. “Of course you can”, yn says leaning down to kiss bokuto. “Can we cuddle now, I want to hold you, he asks, looking up at her with puppy dog eyes. “Of course you know I love your cuddles”, she says, moving the rolling hospital tray out of the way. 

She pulls down the guard rail and she sits down beside him and she swings her legs onto the bed, pulling up the guard rail so that she doesn’t fall off. Bokuto wraps his ailing arms around her and he pulls her close to him and closes his eyes. “I love you yn and thank you for these two wonderful years”, he says as he cries into her hair. “I love you too kou and I am sure we will have many more”, yn says as she starts to cry as well. “You don’t know that you yn, please find someone after I've gone, I would hate for you to be sad,'' bokuto says and if yn isn't mistaken his voice seems to be getting raspier. “What are you talking about, kou I could never love someone as much as i have loved you” yn says. “Promise me,'' he says, tightening his hold on her. “You will try to find happiness after I'm gone”. “You are not going to leave me anytime soon but sure I promise to find happiness”, she says snuggling up close to him. “Good, thank you”, he whispers and she feels him relax against her. “Let’s rest, I just want to hold you while we sleep, okay,” he says. “Okay love you kou” she says closing her eyes and she lets sleep overtake her. “Love you too yn”, he whispers as he too closes his eyes.

Yn’s eyes suddenly snap open as she hears loud and shrill alarms going off around her. “What's going on?'' she asks, looking around disoriented and wide eyed as several nurses and doctors all rush into the room at the same time. One of the nurses pulls down the guard rail. ““Ma'am we need you to get back off the bed because your husband is going into a code blue and we need room to see if we can revive him”, one of the doctors says. Yn gasps as she hops up from off of the bed and her eyes widened as she sees bokuto lying there motionless with a peaceful smile on his face. “Koutarou”, she whispers weakly hoping he will wake up but her hopes are falling faster and faster by the moment. “Please get out of the way ma’am”, a doctor says as he pushes her back. In all of the chaos yn notices that striker had fallen to the floor. She picks up the stuffed owl in her arms and her hold on it tightens as she begins to cry when bokuto showed no signs of response to the doctors attempts to revive him. “Call it”, the doctor says sadly as he stops trying to revive Bokuto and he pulls away shaking his head sadly. “Time of death 12:01 December twenty fifth”. Yn sobs as she drops to her knees on the floor and she cries and the doctor’s clench their fists and they look away sadly as she wails her heart out. “Of all days why did it have to be christmas”, yn says sobbing. A nurse comes over and she helps her to her feet and wraps a blanket around her shoulders. “Is there anyone you would like me to call dear, '' the nurse asks, rubbing her arm in an effort to comfort her. “My brother”, she says as she bites her lip in order to be able to speak and not cry again. “He was my husband’s best friend,” yn says numbly. The nurse nods. “Okay, why don't I get you something warm to drink and you can give me his number alright dear”? “Okay”, yn whispers.

The nurse leads her out to the nurses station and she sets her down in a chair. Dazed yn hears some christmas music playing on the radio at the nurses station but the cheeriness of the music is only making her feel sick to her stomach. She definitely doesn't feel like this is the most wonderful time of the year. She holds striker close to her and she feels tears leaking down her cheeks as she can smell bokuto's scent on the stuffed owl. What a way to spend Christmas, alone in a hospital after her husband has passed away.

After getting her a large cup of hot chocolate the nurse gets akaashi’s number from yn and then it's not too long before he gets to the hospital after the nurse calls him, even though it is so late at night. “Yn, I am here”, she hears Akaashi call out her name as he runs down the hall to her and when she looks up she is surprised to see tears running down his face as normally he hardly ever shows any emotion. '`Keiji”, she says as she bites her lips and the tears flow freely down her cheeks once more. “What happened”, akaashi asks, bending down so that he can be at her eye level. “We fell asleep cuddled together and oh keiji he died in his sleep”, she said sobbing loudly. Yn throws her arms around Akaashi and he hugs her tightly to him and he holds her as she cries, soaking his shirt. “At least he died with you there with him”, akaashi whispers, rubbing her back. “At least he wasn't alone”. Yn nods but she doesn't say anything. “Do you want to stay with me for a few days yn”, akaashi asks. Yn nods as she rubs at her eyes. “I don't know what I'm going to do Keiji” she says, trying not to let her emotions overflow again. She sees Akaashi rub tears out of the corners of his eyes as he helps her up out of the chair and he wraps an arm around her shoulder. “Hey don't worry we will get through this together” he says as they head out of the hospital. 

The day that yn decides to head back to her and bokuto’s house is after she and Akaashi attend bokuto’s funeral and akaashi goes with her because he knows that she can’t handle being alone right now. Yn takes a deep breath as she unlocks the front door and she takes a step inside the house. Instantly as she walks inside she is met by the memories that she shared with bokuto, the moments they shared together that she is finding hard to face. The late night movie marathons, the cookie competition they had in the kitchen, and the moments of pure adoration and intimacy that she could never get back. “Are you okay”? Akaashi asks, walking up to stand beside her and he rubs her shoulder. Yn nods and she rubs at her eyes as she takes a deep breath. “Yeah i think i'll be fine but i'm going to need a minute Keiji”. “Of course take all the time you need,'' he says. Yn walks down the hall of the now oh so quiet house and something feels like it is telling her to open the hallway closet. Yn opens the door to the closet and a large box falls to the ground in front of her and lands at her feet. Curiously, she bends down on her knees to see what the box is as she had never seen this box before. “I heard a loud noise, are you okay yn,” akaashi asks, walking down the hall and over to her. Yn nods and tears well up in her eyes as she opens the large box to find a giant scrapbook with the title our lifetime of memories written across the front. Yn opens the cover and the first page makes her gasp as it's a note to her from bokuto. Hey yn i made this scrapbook for us to keep our memories in. Each time I take a picture of us I'm adding it to this book so here is to all of the memories we have made and here is to all of the ones awaiting us in the future. Yours forever and for always your sunshine, Koutarou.

She flips the page of the scrapbook and she is met with a picture of her, bokuto, and akaashi in high school when they first met and akaashi introduced her to bokuto and that is when she had started to develop a crush on him so the memory filled her with a lot of overwhelming emotions. She sniffled as she flipped through the pages of the scrapbook seeing so many memories unfold before her, some she remembered with distinct and perfect clarity while others she remembered only when she saw the photo laid out in front of her. One of the final pictures in the scrapbook was of the one that they took at their wedding at the courthouse and that was shortly before bokuto was admitted to the hospital. “Are you going to be okay”? Akaashi asks, sitting beside her on the floor of the hall. Yn nods as she rubs at the mascara that is running down her cheeks. “I think so Keiji, koutarou told me to find happiness but it may take me a while before i'm ready to date again if I am ever ready at all”. “Of course”, akaashi says as gets up out of the floor and he pulls yn up as well. “I'm sure bokuto will understand if you don't move on right away”. 

Suddenly Yn feels a draft of wind around her in the hall. “It's okay Yn, I'll always be right beside you and I'll always be your guardian angel, so take all of the time you need you have a lifetime to find happiness again” an invisible voice says from behind her. Yn gasps and she looks around herself quickly. “Are you okay, '' Akaashi asks, looking at her with worry  in his eyes. “I thought I heard a voice say that they would be my guardian angel Keiji, who do you think that it could have been?” she says with tears in her eyes. “Do you think it could have been him”? Akaashi smiles sadly at her. “What is it” yn asks him. “That's the same thing bokuto told me he would do for you when he first learned he was getting sick, he said that when he died he would vow to be your guardian angel and he said that he would watch over you to make sure that you were okay”. “Do you think that he could actually be here with us,” yn asks. Akaashi shrugs as he crosses his arms and a sad smile crosses his face. “Who knows yn, people always say that your loved ones never leave you and that they are never truly gone, and I'm sure that bokuto will be by your side I guarantee it”.

[imaginewarehouse]

Yandere!Marcus White x Reader || Drabble

Plot: I’ve been watching Gotham, so, some delicious villainous yandere stuff for fun. 

Warnings: Abduction, toxic/abusive relationship, basic yandere character (He’s kinda chill though, so it isn't really mega level dark? I guess?) 

🔆  🔆  🔆

The bag is ripped off my head, along with a few strands of my hair, and I gulp down my first non-canvasy breathes in hours, looking around the room I’m in. As soon as I recognise the childish basketball themed bed sheets that I’m plopped onto and the blue walls that could only belong to a man-child that hasn't left his mother since the womb though, a deep, annoyed groan escapes my throat and my head falls back against the wall I’m leaning on. The frustration of another failed escape attempt honestly killing me. “Fuckkkkk. Marcus!” 

Why did I even look around? As if the surroundings after being kidnapped would be any different. It never is. Its always this stupid room. God, I hate it. 

“Hold on a moment- finishing this game.” He unsurprisingly responds, from the floor at the foot of the bed where a TV is set up on the floor- not at all fazed at the fact that his abduction victim is awake. 

I wriggle my wrists, trying to free them from the tent rope tying them together. “Whatever. Just hurry up and untie me. I’m getting rope burn.” 

“Mmm,” Marcus makes an unsure sound back, and I can imagine his face right now even though I cant see it, all twisted up at the nose and the mouth. A harbinger of dread, honestly. My heart feels like it plummets in my chest, right down to my feet. Don’t tell me- “Yeahh, I don’t think so. Not this time, babe. One too many escapes. I told you, you try to leave me one more time and you’ll lose Mr Nice Guy.” He makes a clicking sound with his tongue, as I screw my own face up in confusion. ‘Mr Nice Guy’, did he just say? Oh, please- “Well. You lost him.” 

That... doesn't sound good. I mean, no part of this situation with him is good, but this definitely feels like a tipping point. I feel nauseous suddenly. “What do you mean?” 

“Oh!” Suddenly the TV makes an especially loud noise and the sound of the controller clicking gets more vigorous, as apparently Marcus gets to a particularly difficult part of the game- then celebratory music plays and Marcus gets up, and flops on the bed next to you. “Whoo! I won. Beat the game.” He beams at me, like I actually give a flying fuck that he came first in Mario cart at 100cc, like the loser that he is, and I just look back totally deadpanned. 

I blink, trying to totally show him with my expression and my tone how little this matters right now. Or ever. “Like I care?” 

“Don’t be a bitch.” It should say something about me, and about him, that I used to flinch every time this boy called me that, but now I don't even blink. We’ve been doing this thing for over a decade, since high school when Marcus wasn't a total psycho, so nothing about him surprises me much anymore. 

Not that he isn't, unfortunately, full of surprises even so. 

“Don’t be a psycho kidnapper.” I beam back patronisingly. 

“Ahh, stalemate.” He grins, dropping his hand on my thigh... which... twistedly... still has an effect on me. Not that I ever let him know that, but, it definitely does. Sometimes I wonder, honestly, if that’s why I never successfully escape. Not because he or his butt ugly prison friends are master criminals or anything, but because I’m still holding on to an insane secret hope that somewhere in Marcus is the boy who took me to prom and spiked the punch, and turned up to drive me 3 hours home - to this bedroom, actually, - from a disastrous family holiday that made me cry to him for 2 more hours on the phone, and was happy to do so. Because sometimes he still is that guy.

... Because on a subconscious level I let him find me and drag me back here... even though consciously, I know this is 

-wrong. 

   And abusive... 

                and toxic. 

But on the other hand maybe not. Whatever. Moving on. Taking a deep breath to regather myself and glance up at him, eyes flashing angrily. Through my teeth, I hiss. “Let go.” 

Deeply, entirely hard-done-by, Marcus sighs and rolls his eyes, removing his hand. “Whatever.” I sigh, and lean my head back on the wall- tired. Tired of him, tired of this whole awful game. 

But we go on. We live on; We keep playing. Everyone does. That’s life. 

What else can you do? 

Finally, a couple of minutes later, I turn my head to look at him again and wait for him to catch my gaze and turn his own head to face me back. I talk quietly, calmly, tiredly. “... what did you mean by no more Mr Nice Guy?” 

“Just that.” He exclaims and shrugs, like it explains everything. Which it absolutely does not, but instead of snapping at him I just raise my eyebrows and wait for more of an explanation. “That... you’ll stay tied up. Most of the time, anyway. I mean, you can take showers and stuff without the rope, and on your birthday.” 

“Oh, well aren't you just a regular Prince Charming.” I sigh, rolling my eyes and gazing up at the ceiling now. Great. 

He either didn’t get a feel for the sarcasm or doesn't care. “Well I think so! So does mom.” 

“Oh god.” I groan, squeezing my eyes shut. He’s such a loser. “Norman Bates, much?” 

At the reference that he definitely gets, because we binged the first season of Bates Motel together, like nearly everything else that we do apart from my escaping hobby, Marcus shifts closer to me and bangs the back of his head on the wall. “Oh, Y/N, that’s gross.” Oh so he claims, I think sarcastically, rolling my eyes yet again. Whatever. “I love you.” 

“Yeah, right.” I respond, dully, not even looking at him. At my obvious doubt, he begins to laugh. First chuckles, then full out, raucous laughter. Like its the most hilarious thing that he might not be in love with me. Like- why would he do all this to me? Kidnap me, keep me prisoner, force me to stay with him, tie me up- If he didn’t fucking love me?

I mean I have some ideas, but lets go with his story.

“I do!” He shakes his head, eyebrows knit together in confusion and hurt at my ridiculous accusation that he doesn't love me. “I do, baby.” He shifts so he can look me in the eyes and force a serious look... a goofy grin still stuck on his face that is not encouraging or confidence building at all. “I do. I fucking love you!” 

When he gets like this, its best to pretend like I believe him. Take a deep breath, adjust my thoughts - like you’re going to school and you have to remember that the place is educating you, and that’s good... not thats it's a torture institution for youth. For example, Marcus isn't a psychopathic dick-face. He’s... sometimes, sweet,- , and force a gentle smile. Hold my breath and cup his face the best I can with my wrists tied up, with one hand and lace my fingers through his hair with the other- and try not to like it so much. 

Or like it on a purely physical level and try to ignore the way, deep down, I love him. 

“... You’re right. Sorry. I know you do, baby, thank you. I... I love you too.” 

Easily his expression and his body relax, and he grins that goofy grin again that unfortunately still releases the butterflies in the pit of my stomach. “I know. Sorry, I freak out a little when you say stuff like that.” Oh, I know. “I just wouldn't want you to think that I do anything to hurt you. I just want you close.” 

“I know.” 

He smiles brighter, happy for the positive appraisal and apparent trust from me- especially in the particularly sensitive mood he’s in with me touching him. 

Then he leans across the way and kisses me.