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uh-velkommen · 10 months

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The Reality of Immigration. Life in Sweden:

So this post might be a little controversial depending on your national or heritage history but I'm realizing just how taken for granted the privilege of speaking English in a majority English country is. Believe me, I am a huge advocate for learning the language before visiting that country not just to make getting around easier but out of respect for the culture and people. However, in this case I decided not to learn Swedish before coming here. I know enough to get by and I keep mentioning how I can communicate in Norwegian enough to understand Swedish but there's a part of me that's being hella stubborn about this topic. I think a part of me lives in this world of idolization where Norway is top priority and Sweden is irrelevant. "I'm just here to get to Norway" But that mentality is also proving to be a massive hurdle. My current realistic goal is to get a job in Sweden and with that comes a serious need for fully grasping the culture. I feel like a boomer who's refusing to understand Pronouns. (Of course this isn't the full picture because I am taking steps to learning Swedish but this represents my internal battle).

The problem presents itself when it comes to looking for a job. I was told multiple times that you need to know Swedish to get a job. My American ignorance tells me, that can't be entirely true because most of the country also speaks English. And then I get online to look at applications and either 1) They ask if you can speak Swedish before even being able to apply or 2) The entire application is in Swedish. I found that some jobs are nearly impossible to find unless you are checking out Swedish websites. I got an email from my schools Career site and in Swedish it mentioned all the places that were hiring for 2024 but when I clicked "translate to English," the entire hiring section disappeared. Why?? Immediately my brain goes, "Discrimination! They're actively hiding this stuff from English speakers" And I have enough sense to recognize and check myself for that display of American Entitlement. Of course a place where Swedish is the main language is hiring Swedish speakers to interact with Swedish costumers. And this whole moment of realization has made me frustrated and even a little hopeless at the thought of finding work that occurs at least 80% of the time in English. "But Alisha, just learn Swedish and that'll solve like half of your problems??" Yes I could do that but knowing conversational Swedish is not gonna get me far in Academia and my loyalties lie with learning Norwegian. I can't give up my baby to focus on Swedish (and in that case, don't ask why I came to Sweden instead of going to Norway I've tried justifying my reasoning over and over already). Do you understand what this internal battle is really about? Because I don't. I just can't? It feels like self-sabotage, but why?

Then all this gets me thinking about the millions of Hispanic-Americans who were in the exact position that I'm in but perhaps with more dire consequences. They come to America not knowing a lick of English, not have a Personal Identity Number, not having family to fall back on. Everything I've experienced upon coming here, all those people had to overcome. I can imagine now how hard it was for them. I want to be mad at Sweden for making me jump through all these hoops but this is just the reality for nearly every country out there. I met someone here who tried to move to Canada for sanctuary and they told her no because she didn't have the funds to support herself. The exact situation I was in trying to come to Sweden. It doesn't matter where you're moving to or why, the process is the same everywhere. I don't know why I thought this would be easy but now that it's not, I just wanna go back to America and I can't help but think about all the people who didn't have this option to just "go back where they came from." And it makes me feel guilty for getting worked up over this language barrier.

#life in sweden #sweden travels #Scandi Saga #me

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thearchivestoday · 2 years

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Overlooked No More: Claude Cahun, Whose Photographs Explored Gender and Sexuality

(June 19th, 2019)

Society generally considered women to be women and men to be men in early-20th-century France. Cahun’s work protested gender and sexual norms, and has become increasingly relevant.

“Untitled (Claude Cahun in Le Mystère d’Adam)” by Claude Cahun and Marcel Moore, 1929.Credit...Estate of Claude Cahun, via San Francisco Museum of Modern Art

by Joseph B. Treaster for The New York Times

In early-20th-century France, when society generally considered women to be women and men to be men, Lucy Schwob decided she would rather be called Claude Cahun.

It was her way of protesting gender and sexual norms. She thrived on ambiguity and she chose a name, Claude, that in French could refer to either a man or a woman. She took the last name from her grandmother Mathilda Cahun.

Cahun (ca-AH) made ambiguity a theme in a lifelong exploration of gender and sexual identity as a writer and photographer. Decades after her death, she has a growing following among art historians, feminists and people in the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community.

Working in Paris in the racy 1920s and ’30s alongside Surrealist artists and writers, long before the rise of the gender-neutral “they” as a pronoun and the advent of terms like transgender and queer theory, Cahun created stark, sometimes playful, but deliberately equivocal photos of herself.

Here she’s a man. There she’s a woman. Sometimes she’s a little of both. Sometimes her head is shaved. In one photograph, Cahun brings together two silhouette portraits of herself, bald and austere, sizing each other up. “What do you want from me?” her caption reads.

“Que me veux-tu?” by Claude Cahun, 1928.Credit...Claude Cahun, Musée d'Art Moderne de la Ville de Paris, via Alamy

“Masculine? Feminine?” she wrote in her book “Aveux non Avenus,” published in English as “Disavowals.” “It depends on the situation. Neuter is the only gender that always suits me.”

As writer and photographer, Cahun worked at upending convention. “My role,” she wrote in an essay published after her death, “was to embody my own revolt and to accept, at the proper moment, my destiny, whatever it may be.”

Cahun’s writing is complex and often difficult to follow, scholars say. But it provides context for the photographs and the weave of her life.

The photographs are by far her most compelling work. At first, scholars thought of them as self-portraits. But the gathering consensus is that Cahun choreographed and posed for the photos, and that her romantic partner, Marcel Moore, who was born Suzanne Malherbe, often pressed the button. It was a collaboration.

Cahun died on Dec. 8, 1954, at age 60, on the tiny Channel Island of Jersey off the Normandy coast of France. Hardly anyone noticed. “Disavowals,” her most heartfelt book, had not been well received. And she had never exhibited the photographs.

In the 1990s, however, she received a rush of attention as gender issues were gathering steam around the world. “Suddenly,” said Vince Aletti, a New York photography critic and curator, “she seemed incredibly of the moment.”

A French writer, François Leperlier, published a book on Cahun and helped organize the first exhibition of her work, at a museum in Paris. An English edition was published as “Claude Cahun: Masks and Metamorphoses.”

Professors and graduate students in art history and in feminist and gender studies began writing about her. Art museums wanted her work.

Cahun’s photographs have been displayed in group shows in the last two years in nearly a dozen museums in London, Paris, Washington, Melbourne, Warsaw and elsewhere. She is featured in a group exhibition running through early July at the Contemporary Jewish Museum in San Francisco. Another group show opened in Bonn, Germany, in late May, and one opened in Sweden in mid-June.

“Untitled,” by Claude Cahun and Marcel Moore, circa 1928.Credit...Estate of Claude Cahun, via San Francisco Museum of Modern Art

Tellingly, many middle and high school students have attended the San Francisco exhibition, said Lori Starr, the museum’s director.

“In Cahun you’ve got an artist who turns the camera on themselves to see who else they can become,” said David J. Getsy, a professor at the School of the Art Institute of Chicago who specializes in gender and sexuality in art. “Isn’t that what we’re all doing now with cellphone photos? This is one reason young people might see themselves in Cahun.”

Paris named a street for Cahun and Moore in 2018. That same year, Christian Dior brought out an androgynous collection inspired by Cahun.

Cahun’s art spoke to David Bowie, who was known for his shifting personas. He arranged a flashy, high-tech, outdoor presentation of her photographs in New York in 2007, telling reporters her work was “really quite mad, in the nicest possible way.”

Lucy Renee Mathilde Schwob was born on Oct. 25, 1894, in Nantes, a provincial capital 200 miles southwest of Paris, to Maurice Schwob, the owner and publisher of the regional newspaper Le Phare de La Loire, and Victorine Mary-Antoinette Courbebaisse.

When she was 4, her mother began to show signs of mental illness and her grandmother took her in.

At 12, Lucy was sent to boarding school in England after French classmates began harassing her with anti-Semitic taunts. Back in Nantes at about 14 or 15, she met Suzanne Malherbe, who was two years older. The encounter, Cahun would write, was like a lightning strike.

Eight years later, Cahun’s father remarried. His new wife was Marie Eugénie Malherbe, Suzanne Malherbe’s mother. That made Cahun and Moore stepsisters, which created the appearance of a conventional relationship.

In Paris, they lived comfortably off family money. Drawing on her studies at the Sorbonne, Cahun wrote for literary magazines and journals, published at least two books and performed in experimental theater.

Moore worked as an illustrator and theatrical designer. Their apartment became a gathering place for writers and artists. They talked about social justice and debated communism as a counterforce to fascism. André Breton, a leader of the Surrealist movement, wrote in a letter to Cahun in the early 1930s that she was “one of the most curious spirits of our time.”

Left, “Marcel Moore” and right, “Self Portrait,” by Claude Cahun, 1928. Credit...Jersey Heritage Collections/Jersey Heritage

Scholars are convinced that the choice of the name Claude Cahun was an important and symbolic expression of Cahun’s worldview. “It was not just a pen name,” said Jennifer L. Shaw, an art history professor at Sonoma State University in California and the author of a biography of Cahun. And yet Cahun and Moore usually called each other Lucy and Suzanne. Many friends and relatives also addressed them by those names.

In a similar separation between the intimate and the public, scholars say, the photographs were more part of a private conversation than something to present to the world.

“They were in the mode of investigation, who you could be, how you could be, projecting yourself into another skin, another universe,” said Tirza True Latimer, a professor at the California College of the Arts in San Francisco, who first wrote about Cahun in her Ph.D. thesis nearly 20 years ago. “These were two lesbians living within certain constraints. The photographs, the acting out, were a way of being free. It wasn’t really about producing an art object.”

In 1937, with tension rising in prewar Paris, Cahun and Moore decamped for Jersey, where they bought a large granite house overlooking St. Brelade’s Bay.

When the Nazis rolled over France in 1940, they took Jersey and the other Channel Islands. Cahun and Moore fought back — with their typewriter and pens, writing short messages to the Germans under the guise of an unhappy soldier they called “the soldier with no name,” said Louise Downie, the director of curation at the Jersey Heritage Trust, which has the main collection of Cahun’s and Moore’s work.

The messages — written on small bits of paper, sometimes even toilet paper — said that the war was lost, that German troops should look out for themselves. They called Hitler a vampire. Whatever the soldiers’ commanders might say, one note read, “Nobody dies for us.”

They slipped the notes into uniform pockets at the laundry, under windshield wipers and into cigarette packs left on cafe tables, Val Nelson, the senior registrar at the Jersey trust, said.

“Self Portrait,” with cat, in garden, by Claude Cahun, 1950. Credit... Jersey Heritage Collections/Jersey Heritage

It was a small-scale effort, with serious consequences. Cahun and Moore had a suicide plan and carried barbiturates. After three years they were caught and sentenced to death. Twice, they tried to kill themselves but underdosed. The war ended and they went free.

Cahun died nine years later and was buried in the churchyard next to their house. Moore took her own life 18 years after that. They are now together under a single gravestone inscribed with two Stars of David and their birth names.

Why they did not put Claude Cahun and Marcel Moore on the tombstone — or use them in their handwritten wills — is a mystery. There are no clues at the Jersey trust.

But whatever their reasoning, Cahun and Moore remain symbols of how people can break free of society’s preconceptions.

“Their lives were a performance around the questioning of identity,” Jonathan Carter, the chief executive of the Jersey trust, said.

#gender #claude cahun #history #lgbtq history #lgbtq #france #the new york times #joseph b treaster #the 20th century #lgbtq archives #archives #archival #archive #dior #david bowie

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5577v · 2 years

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masterpost for my versions of various hetalia characters i like bc i want their identities to be respected and their stories to be understood here (will be continued)

mathias (denmark); nonbinary; any pronouns

- gay

- hyperactive adhd and dyslexia (& ptsd?)

- he just like me fr... happy idiot who wouldn't hurt a fly (unless it's swedish) but also has a lot of internalized issues that he only started addressing at around the 70s/80s. she's also not exactly stupid or anything, just awful at reading tones or organizing herself. picked up smoking from his relationship with netherlands. an alcoholic but pretends they're not

- had things going on with tim/netherlands, ludwig and occassionally ber but every time she was just trying to run away from the fact that he's in love with his bestie the norwegian

lukas (norway); ???; he/she

- bi

- generalized anxiety

- it has taken him until like the 2010s that maybe raising herself as a woman for hundreds of years and enjoying it has made her might not exactly cis. also has extreme paranoia but refuses to address it. has a lot of internalized issues going on that he needs to deal with but would rather just look sexy than talk about his feelings

emil (iceland); trans guy, he/him

- ??? likes men

- ptsd and depression

- came to terms with his identity in about the 80s

- has started talking to leon in the 90s online

tino (finland); cis guy, he/him

- pan

- neurotypical

- hard of hearing/deaf

- also TONE deaf xd he always sticks his nose into other people's business and tries to "help" but isn't always exactly helping... also alcoholic no. 2

berwald (sweden); cis guy, he/him

- gay

- asd

- it's hetalia sweden what do you want

eduard (estonia); agender; they/he

- fluctuates/unlabelled

- idk tbh but probably not nt

- just living their best life out of all of them tbh. the only person without constant existential dread haunting them

raivis (latvia); cis guy, he/him

- ???

- generalized anxiety

- definitely more of an actual teen in my interpretation than the uwu-fied version of the manga. smart fella who doesn't know how to deal with having so many things expected from him. of course he fell in love with the one person who isn't expecting anything from him and instead cares about his feelings

leon (hong kong); ???; doesn't mind any pronouns, mostly he/him

- a queer mystery.......

- asd

- tbh his canon version is kinda bland i will not lie... but i still like this goofy guy. i write him as someone like mathias but more tame and less hyperactive. they're still an incredibly strange person though - i HAVE a specific personality in mind but i don't know how to describe it... like every interaction with him is just a fever dream in a way because he's really just saying things and you can't read his expression

my ships that i enjoy:

long term (in my stories) - dennor, estlat, sufin, hongice (i know it's basic i'm sorry)

short term - densu, nedden, gerden, norfin, estice

outside of those charas: gerita, gerfra, ruspru, lietpol etc etc...

i also want to clarify. i'm trans (enby) myself and either me or my hetalia friends have several of the illnesses listed, we didn't assign the characters those to make them "quirky", but because we're projecting and want to see some better representation :]

also - i barely associate them with being countries rly. i mostly see them as people living their own lives who happen to be immortal and represent their citizens, they're not bound to stereotypes or politics or anything.

#quickly written upon the request of a certain placebo person #what 7 gay years of being into hetalia do to a mf #hetalia

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dontexpecttomakesense · 6 years

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Kinds of representation Overwatch has

Racial and National: This goes far beyond dark skin vs white skin (which is a pretty reductive, and in my opinion slightly racist way to look at things). We have dark skinned characters but all of them are unique and cannot be exchanged between them: Akande is African, Ana is Egyptian, Symmetra is Indian, Lucio is Brazilian and Sombra is mexican. Among the white characters we have Briggite and Torbjörn, who are from Sweden, Mercy is from Switzerland and Moira is Irish. Hanzo, Genji, Mei and D.va might be fair skinned but they are not white, Mei is chinese, D.va korean and Hanzo and Genji Japanese. And many of these characters take many aspects of their culture and national identity and include it in their character: Phara is mixed race, both Egyptian and Native American, and incorporates elements of both nations in her character and skins. Junkrat and Roadhog might be both Australians, but one draws characterization form the actual in gam Australia wheres the other has Maori heritage. The four American characters are also very different, Soldier 76 encapsulates may American stereotypes (action hero, blonde blue eyed poster boy, patriotic militar, red, white and blue all over etc), Reaper has an Hispanic background and he’s from LA, Mccree and Ashe have both a wild west imagery, but he has leans towards the cowboy aesthetic, she has a more markedly bandit/mafia princes vibe.

Body-type: This can be contentious. And I know tumblr has had a lo of bitch fights about this. But Overwatch does have body type diversity. Of course whe have the more extreme examples, like Roadhog Reinhardt Orisa and Zarya, who deviate a lot from the most common body-type, most of the other characters do, admitedly, gravitate towards a more idealized body type, both male and female characters. But even then there are differences, Junkrat and Moira have very elongated and tall appearances (even though Junkrat hunches a lot), Lucio is very short, Mei has more soft slightly chubby features, D.va is very petite and Briggite has a more muscular build.

LGBT+: Now It would be great if we had more than 3 LGBT+ characters, yes. I absolutely agree. But two of those characters are openly gay and they are also two of the most recognisable characters in the game (Tracer and Soldier 76), with their sexuality being tied to their characterization without needing to use stereotypes to transmit their sexual orientation. Lynx 17 is also nb, with they/them pronouns. Considering that Overwatch has been and is a very popular game, that has a place in incredibly homophobic places like Russia, that fact that they are making the effort to make characters like them it’s very important.

Age: Overwatch has a wide range of ages. I don’t know many games that let you play as a 19-year-old gamer-turned-militar-celebrity and also as a 60-year-old veteran who has lost an eye. The representation of different ages, while nothing major, it’s still something to be noted.

Mental illness and disabilities: Both D.va and Bastion have PSTD. Many characters have lost their limbs, like Mccree or Junkrat, and as mentioned, Ana lost an eye. While the Overwatch team hasn’t delved too much into this aspect of the characters, I think they should do and explain what those losses meant to this characters and how a prosthetic has helped them in life.

Other: Symmetra is autistic, Ashe is probably albino and Moira has heterochromia. All of them things that are worth noticing. Specially Symmetra being autistic, since it’s not that usual to find characters that are autistic without being heavily stigmatized or stereotyped in media.

#overwatch #fandom #representation #diversity

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viktcria-blog · 5 years

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stellaluna • viktoria “vik” • aaland s u l l i v a n

icy breezes float across naked flesh as melodies coated in melancholia float across stale air. useless factoids trail across their mind, she traces patterns against florals sitting in tepid water. she strokes the neck of an empty champagne bottle, shatters it against marble. they say it’s all too much, the thought beckons bumps to rise against her skin.

d e m o g r a p h i c s

full name: stellaluna viktoria “vik” aaland

age: twenty-one

sexuality: bisexual

gender: demiwoman / she & they

major & minor: psychology ( major ) & anthropology ( minor )

♪ icy — kim petras

family • history • connections • plots under the cut & exhaustive

f a m i l y

father ( adoptive / deceased ) mother ( adoptive ) peter aaland ( sol invictus ) camille aaland ( née bordelais )

grandmother ( adoptive ) vikoria “angelique” bordelais ( née eriksson )

( cancer / death tw for everything below this warning )

• their father was a musician who went by the alias “sol invictus” ( after the roman sun god ), his band, invincible, was extremely successful in the late eighties / early nineties and has some classics ( the most helpful comparison i have for sol is kurt cobain mixed with alex turner and flung back to the 90s. )

he was diagnosed with cancer when vik was a child, and became involved with a faith healer and his cult ( the sun’s chosen children ) before his death. after his death, there was a vicious battle over his estate, as he left everything to the cult and its manipulative leader. this is a dark chapter of vik’s life, and she didn’t entirely understand what was going on due to her young age, just that her father was dead and it ruined her mother. sol’s involvement with the chosen children was the subject of much tabloid gossip, and so was the legal battle.

• her mother was a model and the daughter of a swedish-french film star ( the original viktoria ) who married an “english screenwriter with a french name.” camille is very fond of horses and horse racing and has spent large parts of her life on stud farms ( including her own parents’ stud in england, where her mother retired to ), and currently lives on one in mexico, somewhat close to mexico city.

• viktoria is adopted, she was born in sweden ( which both of her adoptive parents had a connection to ) and placed for adoption by her birth parents shortly after. they don’t particularly care to know anything about their birth parents, and haven’t made any effort to seek them out. they were adopted when they were two years old, so they retain some vague memories of the orphanage, but they can’t speak swedish anymore.

h i s t o r y

places lived

stockholm ( childhood )

tokyo ( childhood )

los angeles / new york city ( childhood )

oxfordshire ( childhood / as a teenager )

mexico city / valley of mexico ( as a teenager )

paris ( to attend the paris opera’s ballet academy, as a teenager )

important / helpful information

being a rockstar’s child had its difficulties and successes. vik was always the coolest child in any given room ( at least, by default ) but she spent most of her childhood in impermanent places: tokyo ( two years while sol & invincible were recording a reunion album ), los angeles and nyc ( whenever her father’s profession demanded it ), oxfordshire with her mother and grandmother, stockholm for a few years post-adoption. they never made many real friends, and cultivated a reputation for being just like silk ( pretty and difficult to hold onto ) over time. they’re used to being alone.

dancing, particularly classical ballet, was their first love. they took their first class in tokyo when they were still very young, and they were good. when she was dancing, vik wasn’t someone else’s child, she was her own person, with her own passions. after their father’s death, their mother became despondent ( especially as the legal battle was lost ) and they needed to get away, so they used some of their talent and a lot of nepotism to audition for the paris opera’s ballet academy ( one of the best in the world. ) not that they’ll admit to the nepotism. from age 12-17 vik lived alone in paris, attending the academy and going by her mother’s maiden name ( bordelais ) in order to deny any connection to their father.

vik stopped dancing when she was 18, after she moved back in with her mother after her grandmother’s death ( without her, her mother would have been completely alone, so it was necessary, and repayment for the five years of freedom she had been afforded. ) but dancing remains their first, and currently only, love, and she still does it. just not under the eyes of any teacher.

their gender expression is hyper feminine ( lots of glitter and neon ) but this doesn’t mean they’re a woman. vik identifies as demigender ( specifically a demiwoman / demigirl ) and came to the realisation that she was not fully comfortable with her identity was a girl for the first time after her father’s death. they don’t particularly care to explain it more than “you can be feminine without being female.” anyone who comes into proximity of her is aware of her pronouns and identification.

they didn’t want to go to providence. when they were applying, they were disgusted by the enormous wealth and privilege that surrounded them ( nevermind how often she uses hers ) and found it repulsive. but providence was the best school and the easiest to bribe, and in the end, the college was very, very far from mexico city.

in their first semester, they mostly kept to themself, keeping their head down so no one would ask questions about who they were or where they came from. but in her second semester, vik started performing again: she had a third story window, a highly fuckable toned body, and she missed ballet. egged on enough times by partygoers struggling through snow or melt, they would take to their window, a silhouette of a person, smooth bare skin and mystery. performing became parties. parties became more parties. being a partygoer became being sol invictus’ child.

they’re in a constant state of reinvention. are they a good student, or just rich and the child of someone famous ? does she like the endless bacchanalia and orgiastic weekdays, or is it all she knows at this school ? what the fuck is vik going to do with themself after graduating with the degree they don’t care about ? don’t ask.

tldr no one understands what she’s doing, let alone her. & they have a reputation as the person to go to for a party.

c o n n e c t i o n s ( q u i c k f i r e )

champagne prince(ss): someone vik parties with, possibly a procurer of illicit substances, they have a soft spot ( possibly romantic ) for them

twisted sibling: horribly toxic relationship that consists mostly of egging each other on and fucking each other up

cheat sheet: vik doesn’t like to study, so they’re her go-to “study partner.” aka, the person she bribes to help her ( aka.... write her papers for her )

invincible ? don’t know them: someone who’s a fan of vik’s father’s band / knows all the gossip and is intrigued by why it was like to grow up as sol’s child

no danes allowed: international kids club ? ( aside: idk what citizenship vik even has lol ? i just realised this ! )

p l o t s

cause of you, now my heart is so icy ( former lover / enemy / angst / pining / fuck it )

vik’s first real relationship, started at providence, probably in second year ? very intense, ended really, really badly ( think public shouting matches. ) occasionally, always, in moments of weakness, they miss this person immensely, and considering going back / taking them back. she doesn’t even remember why it ended in the first place, at this point. ( but some part of vik also knows it will end in the same fiery crash if they try again. )

this could also be platonic because losing friends ? painful.

gave me something to believe in ( member of or close to / fascinated by the sun’s chosen children cult )

for the most part, the cult that their mother is certain played a role in killing their father hasn’t played a role in vik’s life in years ( beside camille aaland’s refusal to say its name of the name of its leader. ) but new york is a big place, and the internet is strange and vast, so this plot involves someone who is a member of, or close to someone who is a member of, or is interested in the sun’s chosen children ( a “self help group” dedicated to spiritual healing and the abandonment of modern medicine, in actuality a cult. ) vik still carries a lot of resentment for what they did to her mother and some small part of them fears the chosen children. so living / partying / studying in close proximity to someone who is involved with them is probably not going to end well.

don’t search me in here, i’m already gone baby ( “perfect match” / counterpart / mystery )

someone vik is highly interested in ( platonically / romantically / sexually / whatever, 22 year olds are dumb ). they feel like every time they try to get close to this person, they slip away, which is something vik has a lot of practice doing herself. she doesn’t like it being turned back on her, and she’s starting to run out of patience for them.

... but not yet.

i ain’t ever gonna settle ( patron / private shows / throwing parties so one person will come / ideal / disaster in the making )

dancing is such a big part of vik’s life, and stopping their dance career may be one of the few things they actually regret. this person is vik’s “dance partner” and “patron”, someone who always encourages her to dance for / with them ( sometimes in private, wink, but as always this could be platonic ) and whose approval she craves for no reason she could name. they’re stumbling towards being dependent on this person, and it’s not going to end well, but for right now, it’s passionate and full of feelings and admiration and divine adoration.

#tag later it's so late #provintro #no proofreading we die like idiots #♡ | about

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goawaysugardrop-blog · 6 years

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SUGARDROP50 CALLOUT POST

CONTRIBUTORS: Darth | Shining | RainbowB | Carl DISCLAIMER: DO NOT GO WITCHHUNT THE USER MENTIONED IN THIS CALLOUT. WHILE WE DO FIND HIS ACTIONS UNCALLED FOR, THREATENING PEOPLE’S LIVES IS EVEN MORE HARMFUL.

Youtube/Twitter user Sugardrop50, or otherwise known as bart-enderman on Tumblr, is a known Miitopia artist. However, behind closed doors, the user is also known for having to have been abusive towards Shining, their former datefriend, going as far as doxxing them and making them feel unsafe in the Miitopia community altogether, making them go as far as leaving the Amino they once lived to avoid him. He is also known to have allegedly reblogged NSFW of incest, and drew art of his Ex-Dark Lord that’s a child, via child pornography. This callout post will consist of the many witnesses who have been aware of his behavior, and you’ll be hearing from the victim themselves.

- EVIDENCE #1: NSFW BLOG

The user had previously owned a NSFW blog dedicated to posting inappropriate art that contained incestual and pedophilic themes. The previous blog name, which went by sugardrop-nsfw, was known to have multiple instances of art pieces that promoted said themes, and had drawn a sketch their Miitopia OC being raped by Terror Fiends (bestiality) in two pictures, both as the Dark Lord and as the Ex-Dark Lord. The blog lasted for about a week until deletion, possibly due to fearing they would be spotted of their fetishization of children. Evidence is currently lost, but please notify us if you have any photos of the NSFW art.

- EVIDENCE #2: DOXXING

Sugardrop50, prior to the breakup with Shining, immediately went berserk and went as far as sending someone to dox them of their address. Minutes after the breakup, the victim would receive an anonymous message that would as them if they “live on Bell Street.” Fortunately, the victim informed their father of the doxxing. Sugardrop would be dismissive of the threat as well and taunt Shining.

- EVIDENCE #3: MISINFORMATION

The man has made a callout post in regards to Shining on Tumblr, mainly regarding the suicidal or depressed feelings they had during their relationship. However, despite the evidence he had placed on said callout post, most of it was misinformed, and most of the evidence is Sugardrop, himself, being very self-centered, mainly showing how much of a controlling person he was.

- EVIDENCE #4: TOXIC/ABUSIVE BEHAVIOR

Sugardrop is known to have been viciously toxic towards not just Shining but others in the community. There had been numerous witnesses who have been at the receiving end of this behavior and his childish outbursts. Others have also witnessed their terrible treatment of other users in Discord servers, or have almost been manipulated by him.

- EVIDENCE #5: BEING IRRATIONAL AND JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS

Despite numerous reminders from both Shining and other people, Sugardrop has made other irrational claims before, most of which are false accusations of others. During most of the relationship with Shining, Sugardrop would try and place blame on them for not having enough money or a job despite Shining telling them over and over again that they were job searching and trying to build up their portfolio in order to have better luck getting a job in their chosen field. Other times, Shining would be away from messages and be doing something non-Sugardrop/Discord/Miitopia related and instead do something like be in class or shopping for groceries and Sugardrop wouldn’t like not talking to them for long periods of time. Shining even went to Sweden over the summer for a vacation and Sugardrop wanted to hear from them every day. In short, if Shining was not online then Sugardrop was displeased.

- EVIDENCE #6: SUGARDROP’S OWN UNSTABLE MENTAL HEALTH

Despite the terrible mental illness presented in Sugardrop’s callout of their ex, Sugardrop also faced events of wanting to end their own life. They would seek out Shining and express how bad they felt and their desire to end themselves as Shining would try to talk him down. This, in turn, made Shining feel like life wasn’t worth living without Sugardrop and even tried to kill themselves without their knowledge. These events passed back and forth and created a warped, if not eventually toxic relationship. The effects of living with his father is actually from when he lived with his sister to get away from his parents and his sister still treated him badly as well and this made him seal his own emotions to appear cold and disheartened, causing Shining to be dragged along.

- EVIDENCE #7: PRESSURE OF SEXUAL RELATIONS/CONTENT

Shining identifies as Agender and Panromantic and went by she/her pronouns during the course of the relationship. They told Sugardrop this and he told them that he was okay with this but later dropped hints of wanting sexual relations before outright telling them. Shining denied advances before giving in due to pressure. An additional note is that Sugardrop even labeled their relationship as ‘straight’ despite Shining retelling him of their gender identity multiple times.

- EVIDENCE #8: REFUSAL OF OUTSIDE RELATIONS

It was evident now that Sugardrop was a very controlling person. During the relationship with Shining, Shining desired to be friends with others or to keep previous friendships. Sugardrop was not too keen on this and even threw sad fits over Shinings wishes and tried to earn pity points with them to try and waive their interests. Even friends of the two would converse about talking or trying to be friends with other people and Sugardrop would give a stubborn ‘no’ or vaguely sad argument to dishearten them. Shining expressed desires of befriending a person and Sugardrop somehow jumped to the idea of Shining wishing to date this new friend and became distant.

- EVIDENCE #9 - VAGUING

Within the past several weeks, Sugardrop has been talking behind the backs of Shining and other known abuse victims. When Shining made a video venting their feelings in regards to the situation, he immediately lost it, making numerous outbursts and sending other people to harass them and several other friends online. While doing so, many anonymous people called him out on using excuses to deny the fact he’s the one who abused her. To add insult to insult to injury, he would also have an outburst on anonymous people who called him out on what he’s done.

Statement from Shining:

A lot of Sugardrop’s callout is aimed at my self-destructive behavior that had built up from the relationship. I was not of sound mind during the end of this toxic relationship due to Sugardrop being the only one I talked to 24/7 and he was the keeper of all my secrets back then. He was very clingy and would talk down to me for not having a job despite him not having a job himself, would forget and throw a fit as to why I would be away from chatting with him for a time (this was mostly when I had to keep reminding him that I was trying to get a better job or internship in animation but had a weak animation/demo reel to show to studios or companies so I was trying to work on that, I even was poor and in bad living conditions myself and wanted to meet up with him so searching for a job would help with money problems for both of us), and even humiliate or joke on me publicly even when I told him to stop. There’s more to go on about with his mean behavior not only to me but my friends and others in contact with us or just strangers on the same server.

Being around Sugardrop put a drain on me. For a long time I wanted out of this relationship, but after being with him for so long I feared what would happen to me if I broke off the relationship. We both left a server because of another person suicide-baiting everyone and sending me death threats to a friend and me later down the line. I was afraid I wouldn’t be welcomed back in that server due to siding with him based on how he handled the situation. Thankfully everything worked out in the end where the person was booted out of the server and I could safely come back in (though that person would later come back and threaten me and a friend so a callout post was made at them before they apologized and the post was taken down to give them a second chance, sadly they’ve gone back to dirt-talking about me and even claim that I hate them and haven’t moved on from them even though I barely even think about them anymore) and was I was able to regain some mental stability.

During our relationship he did confirm to me that he was plotting his own suicide and I would be the one trying to talk him down but this would mostly end with him ending the conversation on a vague note for the night and me going to bed screaming and crying into my pillows. This wore me down so much over time and my confidence shattered badly while my own anxiety and depression skyrocketed because I became so dependant on him. Mind you, this was my first relationship too so I thought that some of this was normal, to an extent. Part of the reason this relation lasted so long was because I was completely clueless on some parts as to how romantic relationships worked. I was a coward for not breaking this off sooner and felt trapped in the relationship.

My mental health worsened and I told him I couldn’t go on anymore, I hadn’t felt so bad in years. I eventually did find the courage to calm myself down and sought out help online (my psychiatrist wasn’t open 24/7 and you had to make reservations ahead of time, it was a gamble trying to get her on the line when it was an emergency). Eventually I did feel better and even started talking with other friends and have a calming down time being away from chatting since I needed a breather from Sugardrop. He was glad that I was feeling better until I told him that I sought help online. He blew up and I finally snapped- ending the relationship.

It took me months to get better, during the first few weeks I was a mess trying not to cry in front of others or in front of my driving instructors (the driving training was hard on me because I pushed for it so much just so I could get experience to go and see him since we lived in the same state). I was finally able to recover and move on, deleting his contact number, blocking him on all medias he told me he was on, and deleting everything he ever said or gave me. There was no way he’d come back into my life.

Then he showed up on the Miitopia Amino and I had a panic attack and felt very depressed, I was even shaking sometimes due to the idea of him being in a space I thought was safe for me. I eventually learned to ignore him and put him out of my mind but then I had a terrible nightmare about him and decided that this was it- being on the Amino with him around was not possible for me unless I were to face a steep decline of my mental health. I asked a mod to see if anything could be done but this was deemed an ‘outside issue’ so there was nothing more, so that was it. I made a note saying I couldn’t be on there anymore due to me being unsafe since I was popular there and didn’t want to feel guilty for leaving them. I had a withdrawal from Amino and spoke with friends about it, trying to gain back some confidence and mental stability. Then a friend messaged me about my ex having a twitter where I saw that he was attacking one of my posts and even linking a callout towards me on his new tumblr. I had a panic attack and had to tell people I knew immediately about what was going on. He had successfully entered my life again, this time against my will. His post is full of misinformation and he points out a post I made where I was feeling bad for feeling like I had messed up a friendship at school.

I’m thankful that friends and strangers alike have come to my defense and have torn down his callout but there is little chance of me ever speaking to him again still and I would prefer it if I ever to never see him again. I’m still recovering from what he did and him putting false accusations of me has set me back farther. I’m trying to heal and being away from him has worked pretty well so far. I love my friends and everyone who supports me, thank you.

#discourse/#cp/#callout/#callout post/#harassment/#toxic behavior/#nsfw/#drama/#abuse/

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truly-fantastic-me · 6 years

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Debunking Enbyphobia and Panphobia

“the lgbt has become such a trend. pansexuality? nonbinary? demigender? when i was a kid, it was simple. there was lesbian, gay, bi and trans and thats it. and i’m not using any pronouns for anyone except male and female pronouns. i just find any gender neutral pronouns ridiculous. sorry. please dont force your pronouns down my throat.”

Okay there are many things wrong with this statement. Judging by your claim, you do not seem to know anything about anything outside of the LGBT acronym and that’s okay. But please do not claim to know whether these identities are “real” or “fake.” Because you only look like a fool.

Pansexuality has been a word since 1917 to denote the idea that “the sex instinct plays the primary part in all human activity, mental and physical.” Of course, it was at a time when we, as a species, did not have very much information about human psychology. While bisexuality is attraction to two or more genders (i.e. men and women, men and nonbinary, women and nonbinary, agender, genderfluid, demigender, etc) pansexual people can be attracted to all genders and/or regardless of gender.

As for nonbinary people, (and do not that bigender, agender, demigender and genderfluid is under this umbrella) while the term genderqueer came into popular use in the late 1990s, the term had it’s development in the mid 90s and implemented far earlier concepts of nonbinary identites, such as androgyny. While the terms may be new, but the concept of genderqueer is not new. For example: Kristina of Sweden. Historians know her as “the Girl King” She was assigned female at birth, but she would very often dress in men’s clothes and participate in men’s activities. She was described to have a masculine physique and was described to have a low pitched voice, similar to that of a man’s. She refused to get married and shared a bed with her lady-in-waiting, La Belle Comtesse. She reigned over Sweden in the mid 17th century.

Another example would be Hatshepsut, the female pharoah who ruled over Ancient Egypt as a man. She was in power for twenty years and was described as one of Egypt’s most prosperous rulers, profitable traders and prolific builders. But after her reign ended, her nephew Thutmose III assumed the throne and most of Hatshepsut’s inscriptions and iconography was destroyed, her name and title removed and monuments of her image vandalized. Supposedly an effort by Thutmose III to ensure the legitimacy of his son’s Ascension to the throne. She basically remained forgotten until she was discovered in the 20th century.

While it’s true that women had more rights in ancient Egypt than other civilizations, a female pharoah, at the time of her reign was mostly unheard of. At first, Hatshepsut took the unconventional method of combining male and female iconography in her statues, as many early depictions of her is shown as the body of a woman with a traditionally male headdress and dressed in an ankle length gown. In later depictions, she fully presented as a King, supposedly with a beard and muscles.

No one knows for sure the gender identity these people would’ve gone with today. One could argue that they were just very masculine women, but one can’t know for sure.

As for the misgendering thing and the “ridiculous” pronouns, referring to someone as they/them is not grammatically incorrect. People say these pronouns all the time when they are unsure of the persons gender. Example: “To each their own.”

As for the other “ridiculous” pronouns, a lot of them are derived from other languages. For example: “ze” is a Gheg Albanian dialect word, of unclear origion. But it appears in Czech and Dutch. So they’re not as far-fetched as you might think. I do understand they can be hard to say, so some nonbinary people I talk to go with they/them pronouns for auxiliary reasons.

Nobody “forces pronouns down your* throat” by asking you to use the correct pronouns when referring to them. I dont think you know what that means. Its one thing to have trouble saying the pronouns and ask for an auxiliary set but another thing entirely when you absolutely refuse to. If you willingly and knowingly use the wrong pronouns for someone, you are forcing pronouns on them. You are forcing them to be like how you expect them to and forcing them to be the gender you want them to be. Please do not act like a victim when someone gets upset at you for willingly misgendering them.

I understand that pansexuality and nonbinary identites would not make much sense to you at the moment, and that’s okay. I understand that this is your opinion. But there are facts that refute your opinion easily. I hope this makes sense. And I wish you well.

#lgbtqia+ info #enbyphobia #panphobia #exclusionist bullshit #psa

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skateofministry · 3 years

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Alexis Sablone and Leo Baker are USA LGBTQ skateboarders at Olympics

Leo Baker and Alexis Sablone are leading the charge for LGBTQ representation in skateboarding for the United States at the Tokyo Olympics with the launching of the sport at the Summer Games.

Sablone is a queer artist from Brooklyn and the uncommon professional athlete who can justifiably declare that making the Olympic team is just one of a number of remarkable elements about her life. She initially stood out of the skating world as a 16-year-old in 2002 as the only woman included in a well-known video entitled “P.J. Ladd’s Wonderful, Horrible Life.”

Despite the problem of developing herself as a lady in skateboarding, Sablone blazed her own path and ultimately took the X Games by storm, acquiring 3 gold medals, 2 silvers and 2 bronzes.

“Whenever I was met with that hostility, I feel like that fueled me,” she exposed to GQ’s Noah Johnson. “I liked it because I wanted to prove them wrong.”

Alexis Sablone in action at the 2018 X Games.

Photo by Sean M. Haffey/Getty Images

Outside of her sport, Sablone made a Master’s Degree in Architecture from MIT and discovered work creating skateable public sculptures in Sweden and Brooklyn.

She has actually likewise developed a lambda-patterned and rainbow-accented Pride skate shoe in collaboration with Converse.

Looking ahead to Tokyo, Sablone attempted to strike a balance in between enjoyment and keeping a level head.

“After so much build-up and anticipation, a big part of me was looking forward to going, doing my best, and — maybe this sounds weird — getting it over with,” she informed GQ.

Baker has likewise had the experience of creating their own course in their profession, ending up being the very first nonbinary skater to be included in a Tony Hawk computer game in 2015.

“I can’t believe this is actually happening,” Baker informed NowThis News. “I feel like life goal’s achieved.”

Now they’ve included another life objective to their list — representing the U.S. skateboarding group at the Olympics. Baker has actually formerly won 7 X Games medals, and in 2006 they turned into one of the youngest skaters ever to medal at the occasion.

youtube

Unfortunately, the time they committed to their effective skateboarding profession wound up sidetracking from acknowledging the truth of their identity.

“My career didn’t really allow for that exploration, so I kind of tabled it for a really long time until it got to the point where I couldn’t take it anymore,” Baker informed PopSugar’s Samantha Brodsky. “And so that was an eight-year process of living a fragmented life.”

Identifying as transgender and nonbinary, Baker ultimately came out openly in Miley Cyrus’s “Mother’s Daughter” video while included in a shot where they held a skateboard and used a t-shirt emblazoned with “They/Them” pronouns.

Despite dealing with resistance from the skateboarding market, they remained real to who they are and will now be contending in Tokyo.

Despite the spotlight and the pressure to complete, Baker has actually been true to a vision of skateboarding as art, informing NBC’s Torrey Hart, “Skateboarding is not about winning. It’s about creativity and it’s about being an individual. It’s about self-expression.”

The world will quickly get to see Baker and Sablone, together with skateboarder Annie Guglia from Canada, revealing themselves as people and as LGBTQ agents in Tokyo.

Source link

from Skate World. Skateboard News, skateboard shop https://ift.tt/3AClRnK

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aroacesofcolor · 7 years

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Welcome to AroAces of Color!

This is a blog created by and for asexual and aromantic people of colour, where we can have our own space to discuss sexuality, identity, culture and the intersections of each. We welcome questions, discussions and advice from all ace and aro people of colour, and we’re very open to fandom headcanons, discussions of asexuality/aromanticism in media, and more.

We created this blog to have a space to call our own, and to welcome other POC on the aro and ace spectrum. So if you’re an a-spectrum poc, come join us to connect, ask questions and share ideas! Our mods are all people of colour from a variety of backgrounds and ages.

Blog Content:

We welcome all kinds of content! Everything from headcanons, discussions, rants, questions, concerns, and advice from or about ace/aro poc are a-OK. We can also try to provide advice to followers seeking it as best as we can.

Otherwise, our blog will have following guidelines:

This is a discourse-free blog.

This blog will be free of bigotry of any kind, against any race, ethnicity, religion, disability, gender identity or sexuality, etc. No terfs or swerfs allowed.

This blog will prioritise people of colour. While white followers are welcome here, please remember that this space is catered primarily towards aro and ace PoC.

Our topics will be intersectional and inclusive of all aces and aros. Contents here will vary - we hope to discuss political issues, including how our race and our identity intersect with each other, our experiences in regards to family, friends, religion, and maybe even give advice to our readers. We welcome discussion, as long as both sides remain civil. We also welcome ace/aro headcanons about characters of colour, anecdotes, advice, questions and rants. Being from a diverse range of backgrounds, we also hope to provide a variety of perspectives on the topic of asexuality and race.

We also very much welcome content suggestions from our followers, as long as they are within our guidelines.

Our mods are:

@cryingcucumber - Mai Li - 21 - She/Her or They/Them - lesbian demiromantic ace questioning nonbinary - Korean/Ashkenazi

I’m a media studies nerd with a love of video games, a toy collector, a hobbyist artist, and a recent college grad. I’m cryingcucumber on tumblr, come talk to me about the social impact of video games or other nerd stuff!

@europa-io - Europa - 21 - She/Her - Aro/Ace - Indian

I go by Europa, she/her pronouns are good with me and I’m 21 years old. I’m proudly aromantic and asexual. I’m Indian but I was born in South Africa, and I’m currently living in Australia. I’m doing my Bachelor of Science in Maths and Physics currently. I love space, astronomy and all things Maths, especially topology. As for hobbies, I enjoy reading, games, anime/manga, drawing/painting (I’m terrible at it though), playing with my dog Samson and drinking tea. I’m europa-io on tumblr if you ever want someone to talk to.

@kuraihonofullmeta / @thelordofdarknes - Vlad - 17 - She/Her - Quoiromantic Asexual - African-American

I’m Vlad and my pronouns are she/her. I am only weeks away from 18 and I am a possibly non binary quoiromantic asexual, who has some type of attraction to females and female aligned individuals. I am an African-American, living in America. I am a quite boring individual, whose interests include anime, most of the shows on the SyFy channel, Dungeons and Dragons, Harry Potter, most movies from the MCU (except Captain America) and other books/movies/shows of science fiction and fantasy subject matter, so long as it has action in it.

@mooncake24 - Sofia - 16 - She/Her - Cis Alloromantic Ace - Native American

Hello, I’m Sofia a 16 year old who goes by she/her pronouns and I am a cis alloromantic ace ( though things may change, I am still figuring myself but I will always be ace). I am a proud Native American, who was born in San Francisco but is being primarily raised in Houston. I live for memes and nerding out over the things I love such as comics/anime/cartoons,history and medicine. My dream is to one day become a surgeon and to open my own hospital.

@se-anubis - Se-Anubis - 19 - He/Him or They/Them - Agender Asexual Aromantic Panalterous - African-American

Hello, I’m Se-Anubis, a 19 year old Agender Asexual Aromantic Panalterous Black guy. I use he/him or they/them pronouns, but it doesn’t really matter to me. Originally from Louisiana, I’ve lived pretty much everywhere in the Southern US. Big anime fan, but I love most animation, even in America. If you see a HC for a cartoon or book that you’ve never heard of, it was probably me, lol.

@stardust-rain - Alex - 27 - She/Her - Aromantic Asexual - Chinese

I’m stardust (or Alex), I’m a 1.5 generation Chinese diaspora who grew up in Sweden, recently finished my MA and am currently working in Hong Kong. I like reading, space, cities, urban fantasy and audio drama and occasionally going on long rants about politics and representation.

Extra thanks to @uncontinuous for the original idea.

#ace positivity #safeforace #safeforaro #asexuality #diverse asexuality

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reconditarmonia · 5 years

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Dear Prime Time Player

Hello, lovely writer!

I’m reconditarmonia here and on AO3 (and have been since LJ days, but my LJ is locked down and I only have a DW to see locked things). I have anon messaging off, but mods should be able to contact me if you have any questions.

Aubrey-Maturin | Discworld | Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun | Legend of Korra | Team Fortress 2

General likes:

– Relationships that aren’t built on romance or attraction. They can be romantic or sexual as well, but my favorite ships are all ones where it would still be interesting or compelling if the romantic component never materialized.

– Loyalty kink! Trust, affectionate or loving use of titles, gestures of loyalty, replacing one's situational or ethical judgment with someone else's, risking oneself (physically or otherwise) for someone else, not doing so on their orders. Can be commander-subordinate or comrades-in-arms.

– Heists, or other stories where there’s a lot of planning and then we see how the plan goes.

– Femslash, complicated or intense relationships between women, and female-centric gen. Women doing “male” stuff (possibly while crossdressing).

– Stories whose emotional climax or resolution isn’t the sex scene, if there is one.

– Uniforms/costumes/clothing.

– Stories, history, and performance. What gets told and how, what doesn’t get told or written down, behavior in a society where everyone’s consuming media and aware of its tropes, how people create their personas and script their own lines.

General DNW: rape/dubcon, torture, other creative gore; unrequested AUs, including “same setting, different rules” AUs such as soulmates/soulbonds; PWP; food sex; embarrassment; focus on pregnancy; Christmas/Christian themes.

A note: I'm generally fine with "/" ships where the fic doesn't contain a kiss, overt declaration of love, etc. I'll trust that you wrote it with shippy intent and don't expect you to force in something that wouldn't fit the story.

—

Fandom: Aubrey-Maturin Series

Ship(s): Clarissa Oakes & Diana Villiers & Sophie Aubrey, Diana Villiers & None, Clarissa Oakes/Diana Villiers

I'm finding myself most excited to read about the women in Aubrey-Maturin. I've always liked Diana, and I'm interested in stuff like, how can I say this, the female household that they're living in when Jack and Stephen are at sea, Diana's longing for and seizure upon any kind of freedom she can find and whether or not she thinks the persona everyone knows is "her", Clarissa's way of seeing and moving in the world. I'd love to read something where any of these combinations (or solo) have something to make choices about and show their strengths and desires. Espionage-related adventures or other small-scale casefic, encountering men in society that Clarissa knows from her previous life, dealing with a problem as a family/household? Diana learning her way around Boston or Sweden, or picking up new extreme sports? AU where women can be in the Navy and we get to see what they'd be like as sailors or officers??? (I'd prefer that we see them at a point where they are not at odds over romantic issues with men.) If writing Clarissa/Diana specifically, I'd love something of their POVs/voices on the idea of lesbianism, if that makes sense, but I also am perennially into the ways that f/f couples could live together in history without occasioning comment (they're raising a child together because they're such good friends and one is a widow while the other's husband is always away, of course).

—

Fandom: Discworld

Ship(s): Magda "Tonker" Halter/Maladict/Tilda "Lofty" Tewt, Magda "Tonker" Halter/Polly Perks/Tilda "Lofty" Tewt, Mildred Froc/Alice "Wazzer" Goom, Polly Perks & Samuel Vimes, Jack Jackrum & Polly "Ozzer" Perks, Maladict/Polly Perks

Tonker/Lofty/Mal or Tonker/Lofty/Polly - These just seemed like ships that would be interesting to see - I guess I imagine them as being short-term given Tonker and Lofty’s one true love, but I’d be interested in seeing why Tonker and Lofty might let someone else in, why Mal or Polly might accept, and how that’d play out. Probably post-canon? How does it come about, if Tonker and Lofty have retired (to be criminals/freedom-fighters, or did they just rob the one bank to get enough to retire on and burn down the one place as personal revenge?) while Mal and Polly are still in the army?

Polly & Jackrum or Polly & Vimes - Just more of Polly and her mentor/s! I love that Monstrous Regiment is about a woman who joins the army in response to an immediate crisis but comes to learn that she’s a cunning bastard and that being a sergeant is what she’s good at. More of Polly learning from Jackrum (or deciding to do things differently, having things to teach) would be great. (She hasn’t heard nearly all Jackrum’s stories - or, even in retirement, there must be some adventure they could have, or something could come up around Jackrum’s big secret, or the book of blackmail.) So would Polly finding a new mentor in Vimes, learning how things work in Ankh-Morpork (as big city - how does she react to all the cultural differences? - or as a power structure where the rules of getting stuff done might be different than in Borogravia) or across periodic meetings when he’s in Borogravia. What are they cynical about, what do they believe in?

Froc/Wazzer - Something with Froc and her loyal secretary/aide, who now has a place in the world, could be really sweet. Wazzer has a connection to the Duchess that could be really meaningful to Froc, but she's also her own person with her own experiences that I'm sure Froc will learn to appreciate, and vice versa.

Mal/Polly - I will always be happy to receive more of this ship. I'm all about the post-canon loyalty kink for them, the different strengths or sacrifices they have at their disposal for each other (Polly’s practicality and cunning, Mal’s intimidating coolness and/or potential berserker rage that Polly might even have to leash in). Polly sends Mal on a dangerous mission; Mal goes off-leash rescuing Polly, or Polly has to bring that potential berserker rage to heel; something about the post-canon rank difference on top of the class difference (Mal is wealthy and cultured and typical commission material and yet is a corporal under Sergeant Perks’s command)...I love high sexual tension in a military context, but also love mutual pining whether from near (if they continue serving in the same regiment, essentially together all the time and unable to act on it) or from far (what if the job separated them - LDR, epistolary?).

I request this fandom constantly, as well as some of the loyalty kink stuff I'm talking about, so I've got more in my "dear author letters" tag.

Fandom-Specific DNW/Exception: gender headcanons, identity musing, or non-canonical pronouns. “He” or “she” for Jackrum are both fine, but I would not want to read the character making a big deal about gender identity or pronouns. Also, er, PWP would probably be fine for the Tonker/Lofty/* ships, although I’m still interested more in the character dynamics than in what would be hot. If writing Mal, please no vampire romance tropes (such as turning or immortality) as focus.

—

Fandom: Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun

Ship(s): Hori Masayuki & Kashima Yuu

I love how ride-or-die obsessed with each other these two are. The bit where Kashima leaves Hori women's clothing in his locker and he's deeply frustrated but also awed by her ability to put an outfit together! How into acting opposite each other and especially dueling each other they get! The coda to the bull scene! I'd be into a story about them acting in a play together or him directing her in a play - working together to create something awesome and intense that shows off both their abilities - or something where they (as per canon) are either intentionally or unintentionally in a tropey situation that may or may not correspond to their gender. Especially (I think, for these two) a trope from a dramatic non-slice-of-life genre. Future fic could also be fun, where they're adults who are still creative collaborators and/or each other's biggest fans in a professional or personal capacity. (Would future!Hori and/or future!Kashima have a girlfriend or wife? Kashima's "ALL THREE OF US WILL HANG" re: Hori's potential future wife is practically memetic in my house.)

I've requested this fandom before, so feel free to check out previous letters in my "dear author letters" tag. (I see from a previous letter that I suggested "give them magical powers" as a potential exception to my unrequested-AUs DNW!)

Fandom-Specific DNW: I would strongly prefer that Kashima's feelings about Hori not be written as overtly romantic or sexual. I think they're probably the most important people to each other, but I don't see her that way. (I'm amused by the possibility of Hori crushing on guy!Kashima, but ultimately, "&" rather than "/".)

—

Fandom: Legend of Korra

Ship(s): Korra & Kuvira, Korra & Zaheer, Lin Beifong/Mako

One thing I enjoyed about seasons 3 and 4 of Korra was the writing team's attempt to write villains who were sincerely committed ideologues with valid points, even if they became evil in pursuit of their goals, and to figure out how Korra could relate to those villains as the Avatar and as the person that she is. I loved how Korra needed to seek help from Zaheer because as an anarchist he truly opposed what Kuvira was doing and wanted to help Korra, and how she was able to empathize with Kuvira at the end of s4 because the two have some big personality similarities. How might they continue to work together or influence each other after the end of s4? I don't need a redemption arc if that's not what you're interested in writing - Zaheer and Kuvira can absolutely continue to believe that their ideals were correct and even that not all of their methods were wrong - but I would be interested in reading about Korra getting more mental/spiritual tutoring from her enemy Zaheer and deciding how much of that she wants to integrate into her practice, seeking Kuvira's advice on how to handle ongoing developments in the Earth Kingdom as it transitions to a republic, sparring or practicing bending with Kuvira, Spirit World meditation adventures with Zaheer... (I haven't read the comics, so you can either take or leave comics canon.)

Or, write me some Lin/Mako! I like that in Mako, Lin finds a mentee who is as cynical and stoic and prickly as she is, with lots of mutual respect for each other's police work. I'd be super into loyaltykink dynamics (whether plotty crimesolving casefic or not - and maybe, like, "of course my feelings for my older mentor/younger protégé are just professional respect and devotion to my team/to the cause of policing" type thing) and/or putting them into scenarios that are Not Dates because they're at the fancy restaurant to bodyguard the candidates, they're undercover, they're just getting takeout because they're working late on a case... They're both terrible at having and expressing emotions so this can only go great. Oh, and absolutely feel free to acknowledge the age difference; Lin deserves a boy toy after everything she's been through, right?

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Fandom: Team Fortress 2

Ship(s): Administrator/Miss Pauling, Miss Pauling & Spy

Admin/Pauling is a ship that desperately needs some loyaltykink. Pauling has had MULTIPLE speeches in the comics about her devotion to Helen - I especially love the one to Gray Mann. ("Stop her? Why would I stop her? I've worked for her my whole life. I've lied for her. Framed people for her. Killed people for her. Do you think I'd do all that if I didn't know what she is? What she's capable of? Do you think I'm some kind of stupid pawn here? I know exactly what she could do with that kind of power, and I'll be right there with her when she does it.") I would love to get a fic that gets into Pauling's loyalty to Helen and willingness to be the one getting her hands dirty on Helen's behalf, into Helen's appreciation for what Pauling can do and decisions about how to direct all that competence while keeping her safe enough; how far they'd go or what they'd do for each other. Expanding something in their backstory, maybe something alluded to in that speech? Something in the present/future now that Helen is revivified and hot? (Helen trusting Pauling to inherit everything and become the boss herself?)

Alternately, I'm very fond of what we see of Miss Pauling's friendship with the Spy, given that she seems to see him as one of the only competent/sane people she has to work with and vice versa. Per the Tough Break update they go to wine tastings together and he's tried to teach her to play piano; I would love more of their friendship, whether on the job (she's more in the know than he is, but he also seems to see her as a mentee, and they both love guns) or at leisure (wingmanning each other to pick up women, going to the opera or something?) Would also be cool with Femspy.

Fandom-Specific DNW: Please stick to Miss Pauling's canon lesbian orientation if the subject comes up.

#dear author letters #patrick o'brian #monstrous regiment #gsnk #tf2 #avatar

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helensblogforcomsclass · 6 years

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Communicating Career Confidence for Women Newly Entering the Workplace

Career Anxiety?

Adulthood can be terrifying! Are you entering the workforce without much experience? One of the toughest things to get right, professionally, is effective communication. It is the main ingredient in productivity and workplace satisfaction. Because we spend a significant amount of time at work, it is important that we hone some people-skills to make our professional lives pleasant. Though this blog post aims to specifically help female-newbies feel confident in communicating at work, the techniques discussed are universal.

Inequality in the Workplace for Women

Aside from anticipatory-anxiety, women starting their careers also deal with the social inequality between men and women in the workplace. According to a Pew Research survey conducted in 2017, 42% of women reported experiencing some kind of gender discrimination at work, whether it be earning less for doing the same job, to treated as if they were not competent.

Across many careers and fields, this imbalance is apparent. For example, in my own industry, architecture, there is a huge lack of gender diversity in leadership. Out of the world’s 100 biggest architecture firms, only 3 were headed by a woman, and all 3 of these firms are based in Sweden.

Foster and Partners, a big architecture office in the UK, all 10 executive partners are men.

Challenges of Communicating in the Workplace for Women

Though self-esteem has no direct effect on performance, it greatly promotes personal happiness and satisfaction. These gendered imbalances have dire effects on female self-esteem (self-evaluation of personal worth). Women tend to have lower confidence in climbing the ranks, perhaps partially due to lack of collegial recognition. Reflected appraisal is the process in which identity is influenced by the way others see us. The lack of recognition may be damaging to women’s confidence of their leadership skills. Many women may not even apply for a promotion, falling under the self-fulfilling prophecy (expectations that give rise to behaviors that make the expectation come true) that they are incompetent.

Women are expected to prioritize childrearing, and familial relationships over their careers. These gendered expectations and roles affect how women communicate professionally. Women are socialized to practice expressive talk to build relationships and communicate empathy, rather than instrumental talk, which is used to solve problems and accomplish tasks. The latter is used more often by men and is deemed more appropriate at work. We can easily see how it could be challenging for people with feminine communication styles to fit in naturally.

Do you need to act like a man to succeed?

Men and women differ on linguistic styles or speech patterns. Women are more likely than men to use second and third person pronouns (we, they), make references to emotion, add intensive adverbs (really tall) and speak longer sentences. Historically at work, women have tried to emulate men by wearing pantsuits, and copying masculine mannerisms. Connie Glaser, a proponent of women’s leadership, argues that women should instead, build on their inherent strengths of collaboration, empathy, and emotional expression to succeed.

Are women like dolphins and men like sharks?

Linguistically, women tend to utilize differential language, which includes:

Rising inflection and tentativeness

tag questions (ie: turning a statement into a question; It’s good, isn’t it?)

“wh” impertitives (ie: “Would you sit down?” versus “Sit down.”)

polite commands

request

absence of course language

lower frequency of interrupting

use of apologetic phrases, use of modal construction (ie: can, may, shall, must, will), and use of qualifiers (ie: really, very, sort of).

Both men and women perceive users of deferential language style as having less power but more personal warmth. Men perceived deferential language users as more friendly and are more willing to share the opinion of the user. Women see the users as more sincere and honest, but are less likely to accept the deferential language users’ opinion.

Differential language can be persuasive and evoke a friendly communication environment at work. However, when trying to persuade female colleagues, perhaps it is better to speak more assertively. This demonstrates that feminine communication styles also has its strengths in the workplace.

However, Glaser also believes that certain speech habits could be eliminated in order to sound more authoritative. This includes:

disclaimers

effusive apologies

fumbling

taking too long to get to a point

allowing emotions to get in the way

not accepting credit

tag lines

But What are the Benefits of Masculine Speech Styles?

In contrast, the ways women are socialized to present themselves, verbally and nonverbally, may be a reason for the the lack of women in high positions of management. Expectancy theory proposes that we develop expectations about how speakers with roles or characteristics should speak. Leaders are generally expected to communicate in more masculine ways in order to demonstrate authority. Researchers also found that men tend to talk in styles that is similar to how superiors communicate. These powerful speech behaviors used by superiors include talking more, interrupting more frequently, giving more directions, and expressing more opinions.

A study on Hillary Clintons’s linguistic styles reveals that her self-presentation has been affected by the gendered expectations of the various political roles she served. Overall, her speech style has became increasingly masculine as her political power increased, though it is not clear whether her language became decreasingly feminine.

Feminine markers include:

first-person pronouns

social references

emotion words

cognitive mechanisms

tentative words

Masculine linguistic markets include:

first person plural pronouns

articles

propositions

anger words

words longer than 6 letters.

Therefore, in fields where men are currently dominant, it may be a good idea to consider adopting some masculine speech styles.

Another element of verbal communication that was explored are hedges (word or phrase to make statement less assertive). It is found that speakers with low expertise who used a low/high level of hedges were not significantly perceived as being more or less authoritative. However, speakers with moderate and high levels of expertise, who spoke with hedges, was perceived to be much lower on authoritativeness. Essentially, your ethos and amount of experience in the workplace is equally as important in establishing authority and trust as your speech style. Thus, hedges in speech may not affect how female newbies are perceived. However, it is important to keep in mind as you further your career.

If you want to be perceived as credible, it is also important to note that you should not engage in verbally aggressive behavior (verbal abuse, yelling, cursing) and exercise high nonverbal immediate behavior (reducing physical distance, touching, displaying relaxed postures and movements). Though this may seem like common sense, this is important to note, especially for men, who are socialized to express anger openly. Displays of this emotion can be detrimental to the work environment and your perceived competency.

Understanding how gendered linguistic styles affect perception of competency is important. Sometimes the way certain things are said matter more than what is said. After all, we want people to listen to us when we speak. Speak honestly in a straight and clear fashion. Be authentic and speak with integrity— be your word. There isn’t a best way to behave or communicate at work. Knowing the tools to intentionally present yourself in the way that makes you feel best is the most important thing. Good luck!!

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liripip · 8 years

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You know that post titled ‘language’ about how the way marginalized people refer to themselves changes with time? Every time it goes past my dash I have this reaction of idk, discomfort. It’s difficult to put into words. And that post has so much momentum that I don’t really want to get in its way, at least not with this really long rambling memoir. So here, have some words. Read them if you’re curious about me.

The language-post starts with a story about a trans woman in her 60′s who refers to herself as transexual, transgendered, mtf and the message is like that is what it was like in the long gone past and we kids today couldn’t possibly understand. Thing is? Those were the terms used when I was suffering (and yes, I was most definitely suffering, it was absolute shit) through my first big wave of gender dysphoria and that’s barely eleven years ago. Those were the words in play. Had non-binary been a term I’d ever heard, I would probably have had a much easier time of it, but it wasn’t, and I was essentially told I had to pick a side and that made me miserable.

I chickened out of my first psych appointment to get testosterone treatment because the pressure to be masculine enough for their criteria was fucking awful. Like. Sweden still demanded trans people be sterilized before they could change their legal gender at this point? This is ten years ago, it’s not in the distant past. I still have my birth name in my passport, along with the name I go by, because it wasn’t legal for me to have an entirely gender neutral name.

Both of these things have changed since, and I could strike that name if I wanted to. But I have changed too, and now I don’t really want to. It’s part of me. And I did eventually go to the trans-care system and I was evaluated for transexualism (hey, that’s what they called it) and I met a pretty fantastic psychiatrist who helped me a lot. It was she who convinced me not to transition and instead she put a lot of work into giving me a sort of mental toolkit to build an own identity instead of trying to jump ship to ‘man’ which, I have to admit she had a point, probably would have suited me just as poorly as ‘woman’.

At this point I had still never heard the term non-binary. This is like four or five years ago. Things have moved very quickly.

Today I’m actually fine with colleagues and casual acquaintances and so on considering me female, when ten years ago being off-handedly gendered by a random stranger would have given me those weird psychosomatic stomach cramps and the cold sweat and that shit, I think enough of you will sort of know the feeling. I don’t like being unnecessarily gendered by people close to me, but since I used to be so sensitive to it the people I kept in my life where the ones who were prepared to adapt their speech patterns to never use pronouns to make me less uncomfortable, so it’s more or less a non-issue. I do on occasion like to wear make-up and dresses, and I actually grew my hair out long, and yes, it took a lot of mental pep-talking to convince myself that it was okay, I can do this if I want to, it doesn’t invalidate me as a person.

I was a bit wary of getting married because we have a nice, non-gendered word for partner that you live with, whereas now I’m a wife. I don’t love the word, tbh, but I like our marriage. We’re good. I can handle outsiders putting words on it.

I am having some serious problems trying to wrestle with the concept of motherhood, because I actually do want kids, like in the next few years, but while I feel like I’m ready enough for parenthood I absolutely cannot deal with the idea of me being either pregnant or a mom, and just writing that made me queasy. ‘Mother’ and ‘parent’ are for some reason miles apart for me and I need to work that out, at least well enough that the idea of someone calling me someone’s mom doesn’t make want to throw up. So yeah, some issues definitively remain.

#personal #pip has gender issues #but they're a lot easier to deal with than they used to be

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ocbungou · 7 years

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Thank you, Lite, for submitting your application! Both mods have gone over it and accepted it for approval into the ring. Please have your blog ready by September 20th.

Country: Sweden

Name: Berwald Oxenstierna

Pronouns: He/Him

Age: 21

Alignment: Armed Detective Agency

Appearance: Berwald Oxenstierna has short light blonde hair and sky blue eyes. He wears a black hoodie with the text “If you are reading this i was forced away from my computer and into society.” on the back and a picture of a mouse on the front. Blue jeans and black tennis shoes a nordic cross about the neck and an ornate belt and glasses conclude his 6’ athletic stature.

Personality: Sweden is calm and reserved when first meeting a new person only after extended conversation does he start to be more open and playful. Although most times emotions are not shown when friends or family are in danger his past self will emerge and a protective instinct will take over. When assigned a task Berwald will always complete the task to the best of his ability in an organized and efficient manner. Loyalty is above all, any and all obligations, promises, or relationships will never be broken on his end. The constant internal struggle between Sweden’s past and who he wants to be constantly eats at him causing turmoil in times of extreme stress. Sweden’s strengths comprise around his ability to quickly solve complex issues, his athletic ability, and efficient completion of tasks. Weaknesses are his vulnerability to revert to his old self in times of extreme stress, his blind loyalty, and need to always do well.

Ability: Sweden’s ability is to be able to travel to parallel universes or dimensions to gather information at the expense of his life force. Currently 5 universes are available to Sweden the first being his home universe which is just called Earth. The second which he calls the Future, the third being named the past, the fourth named the Unknown, lastly the fifth called Hell. Earth which you can guess is where most of us live some might call it home, the Milky Way, or just Earth this is the plane where Sweden ages normally and spends the bulk of his time. The Future is as it states it is the same as Earth but 1000 years in the future when Sweden travels to this dimension aging occurs twice as fast and it would on Earth. The Past dimension Sweden can travel to and watch or be a part of past events to travel to this dimension Sweden has to focus on the event he would like to go to for 1 hour without breaking focus after which he can go to the dimension however Sweden will age 4 times as fast. The Universe of Unknown as its name suggests is widely unknown Sweden has only traveled here once and was greeted by a black abyss although he could still breath nothing else could be made out. Aging in this dimension is also unknown but whenever he came back he immediately went into cardiac arrest causing him to never go back not to mention almost die. Hell is the 9 planes of hell Sweden has never made it past the first plane and normally avoids going here as it is the most dangerous dimension available to him.

Berwald refers to his power as Dark Calling for the risks it poses. Normally used to collect information Sweden also will sometimes travel to the other dimensions as a way to repent his past deeds by helping keep peace and make sure nothing is changed in the Past dimension. Sweden activates his ability by focusing on the desired dimension it takes varying time to travel to a plane with the most being an hour although Berwald’s body stays on Earth dimension his mind and spirit do not stay for they travel to another body in desired dimension.Traveling to another dimension increases the rate at which Sweden ages at varying rates depending on the Universe other drawbacks include if Berwald is hurt or dies in another dimension he will also suffer the same damage on the Earth dimension (for example if he goes to the Past dimension and witnesses a battle and gets caught by a stray bullet or arrow he will take the same damage on Earth). While Berwald is in another dimension his body must stay still and not be disturbed on Earth plane if disturbed it can have detrimental effects such as extreme aging, mental dislocation, or even death. In the other dimensions and even on Earth Sweden goes by the alias Darren Shan.

Background: Berwald was born on June 6,(also known as Sweden’s day) 1996 in Stockholm Sweden. Six years after Berwald was born his parents divorced due to unfaithfulness. Berwald’s mother suffered extremely when she found out leading Berwald to promise to always be loyal so as to never hurt another to such extreme. After the divorce Berwald lived with his mother who was head of security for a large marketing company many of times when his mother would run into a complex problem she would ask Berwald what he thinks without giving away details. Berwald was homeschooled although he had a tutor Berwald’s main teacher was his mother who taught him many of things but above all to always do your best. Eight years into Berwald’s life his mother committed suicide after being fired from her job and going bankrupt. Being forced to move in with his father (who he blamed for the death of his mother and had refused to help them at the time.)

As time passed his resentment of his father cultivated into a deep seething hatred that ate away at him day after day. Eventually what was once just thoughts developed into actions Berwald who understood the works of security from his mother decided to take revenge and gave away his father’s identity and bank account codes to a group of hackers thus leading to his father’s money being lost as well as extreme debt. A year after the passing of Ber’s mother his father also passed away due to suicide. In the next year Berwald although had exacted revenge he felt as though maybe his mother’s passing was his fault and not his father’s. Doubt crept into his mind as he started to regret his past actions towards his father who he started to realize was just trying to make the best of things.

At the age of 10 Berwald’s aunt and uncle had a child who they named Örjan. Berwald found Örjan annoying at first but the more he was around the more Berwald began to like Örjan. Over the next few years Berwald would frequently visit and for a time he forgot about all of the past events that is until Örjan and his parents moved to America. Once again left alone to his thoughts Ber began to recall his parents deaths once again leaving him in a dilemma. Relief only came a few times a year when Örjan and his parents would return to Sweden for family events. During this time Örjan and Berwald would hang out and got along very well.

In Berwald’s 16th year Örjan and his parents vanished leaving many questions for Berwald who decided to go to Port City in America where Örjan and his parents had lived to discover what had happened exactly. Shortly after arriving in Port City Berwald went to the house where Örjan had lived from the outside the house looked undisturbed but when Berwald entered it was a much different story. Inside the house it was completely destroyed almost every piece of furniture was smashed, Berwald proceeded through the house until he arrived in what he believed to be Örjan’s room. Just like the rest of the house nothing in the room was intact he searched through the rubble to try and find anything of note. 1 hour into the search Berwald found Örjan’s favorite stuffed animal immediately he began to sob it grew with intensity as he stared at the stuffed animal Berwald knew that Örjan would never leave this behind or out of his sight. Out of nowhere memories of Örjan and Berwald began to flow through his mind until eventually he found himself no longer in Örjan’s room but in front of the house. Once again he approached the door and opened it just in time to see Örjan in shock as his parents were violently killed by a very large beast. As the beast turned around Berwald tried to get Örjan out but found that he was frozen in place and no words would come out as Berwald attempted to yell for Örjan to get away it happened in a flash and once again Berwald was in Örjan’s room looking at the stuffed animal. After this event every time Berwald would look at the stuffed animal for extended periods of time he would relive the event of Örjan’s parents deaths and soon came to realise that this was not a random occurrence. Eventually Berwald would learn what made his power work and discover 3 other places that he could go to. Berwald continued to search for Örjan and eventually joined the Armed Detective Agency as a way to quicken the search but to date has still not been able to find Örjan.

Sample writing: Berwald sat in a cafe drinking coffee and reading the morning news as he did everyday when he noticed 2 hooded figures enter the cafe and sit down on the other side of the cafe. The figures appeared to be children about the age of 11 which interested Berwald even more for what if one of them was Örjan who he had been attempting to find for 7 years. The two figures each had a cup of black coffee with two sugars a piece after drinking it they talked for about half an hour after which they preceded to leave the cafe and walk down the road. Leaving money on the table Berwald left the cafe and began to tail the two figures.

Two hours into the tail Berwald realised he had been walking in circles and that one of the figures had disappeared the remaining figure went up to a house and went inside leaving Berwald in the street alone. Berwald approached the house carefully it was a small two story house with only two exits a front and back door. Berwald positioned himself so that he could see both entrances 1 hour later he was approached by a stranger who asked why he had been watching his house and scaring his son. Realising that the figure was not who he was looking for he humbly apologised and said that he had the wrong person and was looking for someone else. He bid the stranger a good day and left.

#accepted

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trendingnewsb · 7 years

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LGBTQ Africans celebrate identity and community in this powerful photo series

Image: Mikael Owunna

An ongoing photo series tells the complex stories of LGBTQ Africans, encouraging the celebration of two identities too many believe are at odds with each other.

Queer Nigerian-American photographer Mikael Owunna created Limit(less) to debunk the myth that it’s “un-African” to be LGBTQ. The photographs also highlight queer African style, an essential point of self-expression for the community, according to Owunna.

SEE ALSO: 6 ways allies still marginalize people of color and what to do instead

For the past three years, Owunna has photographed 34 LGBTQ African immigrants for the project, most living in North America. The photos are paired with extensive interviews with each participant, exploring themes of homophobia, race, African identity, abuse, and healing.

“I focus specifically on the LGBTQ African diaspora because we can be visible in ways that many LGBTQ people currently living on the African continent cannot be,” Owunna writes on the project’s website.

Image: Mikael Owunna

Owunna says he started Limit(less) to create a space where LGBTQ African immigrants could celebrate their proud and complicated selves. He says being African and LGBTQ was something he struggled to reconcile when realizing his own queer identity, feeling tension between his sexuality and Nigerian heritage.

“These are two identities that are always framed as antithesis to each other.”

Owunna was outed at 15 years old, and was told by family that being gay was “not of [his] culture.” His family insisted queerness was a “white people” and “American” thing, not something organic to who Owunna was.

“My family started sending me back to Nigeria twice a year with the thought that by re-exposing me to Nigerian and specifically Igbo culture that this ‘gay thing’ would go away,” he says. “It didn’t, and eventually, I was put through a series of exorcisms in Nigeria at the age of 18.”

Image: Mikael Owunna

Owunna says the exorcisms led to severe trauma that caused him to feel like he could not be both gay and African. That belief, he eventually realized, wasn’t true. So he created Limit(less) not only to celebrate LGBTQ African identity, but also to reclaim and heal a part of himself in the process.

Over the past few years, Owunna has photographed and interviewed people like Wiilo Geedi for Limit(less). Geedi, who uses the pronouns they and them, was given the name “Wiilo” by Somalian elders when they were young. It means “girl who dresses like boy.”

Though the name’s meaning may seem offensive in an American context, Geedi says the initiative of their elders to name their experience has been crucial in understanding their identity.

One of Wiilo Geedi’s portraits for Limit(less).

Image: Mikael Owunna

“It’s something that has always comforted me when I was going through my process of discovering my queerness, and helped me to overcome the shame and the feeling of being pushed away from my culture,” Geedi says in their Limit(less) interview.

“With every click of my camera, I work to envision what a free world can look like for black queer and trans people.”

The portraits in Limit(less) are beautiful, vibrant depictions of the queer African diaspora. But Owunna has no formal photographic training just a passion to document the complexity of his community.

One agender participant named Em, who uses the pronouns they and them, describes their experience participating in the portrait series as “liberating,” giving them the ability to confirm who they really are.

“These are two identities that are extremely important, but they are always framed as antithesis to each other,” Em says. “I get to be a living example with many others that they go together perfectly.”

Image: Mikael Owunna

African countries and communities often have a reputation of fostering rampant homophobia. Many regions in Africa, for example, have laws that punish the “crime” of homosexuality with death. But seeing African people as inherently homophobic, Owunna explains, doesn’t give enough attention to the full story.

“Homophobia is a recent import from European colonialism,” he says. “Africans have historically always been at the forefront of understanding of gender and sexuality, and our pre-colonial Indigenous understandings are so rich.”

Image: Mikael Owunna

One example of this history, Owunna says, is in the story of Nzinga of Ndongo and Matamba, a powerful and successful ruler in modern-day Angola in the 1600s. Nzinga’s title “ngola” meant “king,” and she dressed in men’s clothing as she ruled. She also had a harem of young men who dressed as women, who were her “wives.”

“So in 1600s Africa, you had a butch queen with a harem of drag queens leading a struggle against European colonialism. How badass is that?” he says. “But it proves this homophobia is what’s new, and we can and will get back to these rich understandings of gender and sexuality.”

Image: Mikael Owunna

Owunna is currently running a Kickstarter, raising $10,000 to take his project to Europe this fall, where he plans to photograph LGBTQ African immigrants in Belgium, France, Portugal, Sweden, and the UK. After this leg of the journey, he says, his almost four-year project to document the lives of LGBTQ Africans will be complete.

“The pictures are meant to be uplifting and emancipatory,” he says. “With every click of my camera, I work to envision what a free world can look like for black queer and trans people. We exist, and have always existed in African communities.”

Watch: LGBTQ elders give their best advice to younger generations