#nct one shot

[haechurch]

Its mark lees bday (ystd) and i recalled the fact that mark says hes quite obvious if he liked someone, and the fact that i see him kinda obsessed with butts and all those videos where he groped members cheeks never fails to make me drool..... ah i need him in lyfe fr. Also istj♡

So thats why i made this smut based on those^ happy mark day<3

Your roommate is a famous jock, who is currently not home for celebrating his birthday at some party that throws just for him. Honestly, you didn't know it was his birthday until one of your friends that went there told you so. You're known as someone who doesn't like parties, although surprisingly enough, your mbti says that you're an extrovert, but you always find that you're too lazy to do the stuff.

So you're wondering when this your famous roommate will come home from his party, and think of something you could do for him as it's his birthday. He's home pretty late when he finds you watching spirited away in the living room.

"Hey, i thought you were asleep," he said. You munch on your popcorn and replied as your eyes glued to the tv, "hm, how's your party, birthday boy?" He chuckled and took off his cap, throwing it softly on the couch beside you, and heavily seat across from where you're sitting. He leaned back and spread his legs while his hand brushed his messy hair. "Cool, kinda tiring. Feels like my energy's being sucked," "well, that sound sucks." Both of you chuckled, he's so introvert for that (lol).

"I understand," you hum. "You know," you shifted on your seat, and as mark was clearly aware since he saw you in the living room; dressed so loosely only in your camisole (braless) and short pants, showing him a pose that makes you utterly look fuckable, you blurted out, "...do you have any idea what else that can be sucked at this moment?"

"What?" His tone was confused and he's kinda taken aback by your words.

You swear to god that teasing him is the most fun thing to do in this world. You laugh your ass off and brush him away, saying that you need to take a shower since you haven't done that today. I mean, why take a shower when you're literally at home all day?

"Since it's your birthday, why don't you tell me your wish? Or something that you wanted? Think about it while i'm in the shower." You wink at him playfully as you hopped into your room.

Mark's head is full of thoughts right now. He didn't know he would ask someone for giving him a birthday present, but he knows that he really needs that. He's thinking about it so hard as he cooling his head down in the shower too, until he decided on what he wanted for his birthday, especially from you.

Fyi, you can always hear when mark lee is jerking off in his room (or bathroom) when you're home. Of course, the wall is pretty thin and he's just too loud. So when you finished your quick shower and heard him in the bathroom, you knew exactly what he need the most for his birthday.

Later, you knock on mark's door, asking for permission to barge in. "Can i come in?"

"Uh-uh, yeah, sure," when you entered his room, you saw his hair is already half dry, and he is wearing a tight black t-shirt with shorts.

Holy moly.

Honestly, no one in the world would disagree that mark lee is hot.

You're making a bee line to where he stand beside his desk, and started talking next to him. "Sooo have you decided?" He chuckled nervously and started to act like an idiot. "Decided what?"

You frown an eyebrow, "your wish? You can tell me what you want for your birthday?" You reminded him. "Oh that, yeah, um-"

He placed his hand on his nape and be looking so awkward right now, but that's why you like him.

You bit your lips in amusement. Now it's getting harder to hold back.

You can't take it anymore and lean closer to him. He didn't even budge. "Mark.." you place your hands on his torso, and he slightly flinched at your action. "Tell me.." your hands caressing him down his abs, and stop at his groin. "Your wish." You whispered in his ear, and he swear he was getting goosebumps, his breath hitched when you place your hand on his center and gently cupped his bulge.

"Wait, wait, wait, hold up hold up," he's panicking as he points a pointless finger in the air, and you went crazy because of it. You're definitely a simp for mark lee.

"I-uh, hold up a sec, are you for real?" He's questioning instead.

"What do you mean?" You smiled at him. He's so adorable.

"I mean, why are you... i feel like.. this isn't it-"

"Mark."

"Yeah?"

"Just tell me, please? What do you want right now?"

You glanced at his boner and it's so fucking obvious. God it must be hurt. He has to quit playing dumb and ask for it when he knows he needs it more than anything.

"Fuck, help me with these," he gestured upturned hands right above his legs.

"How, mark? Tell me how do you like it, hm?" He has no idea how you had so much fun teasing him.

He got short-circuited again when you press your body against him and crane your head up, about to kiss him, "wai wh-" he backed off a little and placed his hands on your waist, both eyes finding each other as you hum before slowly close the gap between your lips and kissed him.

A short one. And then your eyes meet again, and he give you another kiss, this time out of his control. He basically pressed his face against yours, hands on your jaw before he put it all over your body and proceed to push you against the wall. You hang on him by grabbing at his nape and head, ruffling his hair into a mess. The kiss never breaks, he kiss you like he mean it, now he pressed his body on yours, and you can feel his big cock, hard as a rock. He's not that silent when kissing too, you can hear his breathy grunts and the fact that he's also a moaner. He tilted his head back and forth to kiss you at different angles, his tongue all over your mouth.

Both of you squirmed uncontrollably against each other when you make out against his bedroom wall, he squeezed your ass before he tapped your thighs for you to jump on him and bring you onto his bed.

He didn't waste his time pulling down his shorts and breathily plea, "suck me off."

You delighted hearing his request, overjoyed to finally have him asking for you to please him, "as you wish, sir."

You immediately take him into your hand, eyes locked with him as he winced, groaning when you suck his tip and swallow him into your mouth. When you started to bob your head, he throw his head back with a sigh, his neckline is prominent and his adam's apple bob deliciously.

You can feel your lips torn up because of how big he is, and you can feel the veins as you drag your tongue along his shaft. "Oh, fuck, that's it baby, you're doing so good," he hissed sexily and it almost made you cum. Embarrassing.

Considering how much you are already wet for him from just sucking his cock is insane. He face fucked you as he let out his honey moans and groans, every time you find his tip meeting the back of your throat and you felt like swallowing it, you try your best not to choke miserably on his cock.

"Where do you want me to cum?" He asked. "Of course, you can't talk." He chuckled as he mocked you. "You have to swallow it like a good girl, you think you can do that?" You nod your head eagerly. "Alright."

"Good girl." Every time he spits those words from his mouth, you felt your pussy clenching and it hurts.

His thrusts are getting faster and faster when warm loads run down your throat as he grunts loudly while throwing his head back again, then when he look down, you already gaze into his eyes and barely lick your lips, mouth full and smudged with his cum and your saliva.

"Shit.." he's savoring the sight before him for a while, and then he asked.

"Can i fuck you?"

You cracking up in front of him, it's not funny at all but-

"I told you, your wish is my command, baby." You started to strip and show him your naked body, prettily exposed on his bed, ready to be used.

"Fuck, isn't this my best birthday ever?" You laugh at him again.

"I know. Happy birthday, now eat your cake." You said jokingly.

He sneered and take his remaining clothes off, then crawl into the bed, and started kissing you from head to toe. He played with your tits, fumbled them here and there, pinching your nipples, nipping and licking. He sucked on the flesh just right above your chest, your throat, your shoulder, marking his mark.

"This tells that you're mine."

"Yours."

Your voice hitched and your neck arched when he lick your pussy, eating you out. You squirm under his touch and pull on his hair, only making him more passionate to giving you pleasure. He abused your clit and folds in the most delicious way that made you a moaning mess, the sound of him slurping your juices and his moan was making you beyond aroused. His tongue and lips find their way to clean up and suck every fold, fucking your hole. You whine when you feel like you're about to burst.

"Wait, mark, i wanna come around your cock," you asked him with a pout, and he can't really resist that.

"On your knees, pretty girl." You do as he says, eagerly arching your back and showing him your ass. He slapped it. Twice.

Mark rubs his tip sensually up and down your entrance before lining his cock to your pussy, he's doing that for a while, making more juices leaking from your core. But suddenly he put his cock between your ass cheeks then poked on the entrance, but never really thrust them. He's such a tease.

"H-hurry, please.."

"Hm? It's kinda nice to hear you begging like this, you know? What is it, pretty?"

"Please, mark, just fuck me," he never felt this victorious before.

He smirked and wet his lips, "gladly."

You moan as he rams into you, he picked up a steady pace as he fuck you from behind. He got your eyes rolled to the back of your head, drools are already all over your mouth and chin.

"Fuck, mark," "it's so good. So good, so good, so good," you cry over his cock, you heard him grunt heavily and he felt you tighten when he land another slap on your ass.

"Yeah? You like that, huh? Tell me you like it."

"I like it, i love it, ah-"

He's fucking you so good you felt like you're gonna cum soon. Your pussy keeps getting tighter as it swallows him, wrapping his cock like a gift.

"Are you gonna cum? Come on, cum around me, pretty girl," he squeezed and slap your ass, his thrust never faltered, bringing you into your climax. "Ahh- i think- i'm gonna cum, mark-"

The moment he played with your nipples, you lost it, you came so hard your vision got white as he keep thrusting into you, chasing his high.

"M-mark!"

"I know baby, i know, just, try to take this one okay, please,"

He pleaded. And you moan even harder. He piston in and out until you heard his deep groans as he cum inside you. Both of you were too immersed in the sex that you didn't realize what was just happened. He quickly pulled out though.

"Shit, i'm sorry,"

"It's okay. I'm on the pill anyways,"

When you glanced at him, he was breathing heavily, sweat covering his body, making him glow under the dim light. Mouth agape, hair's disheveled. Perfect.

"So.."

"So?"

"Uh, thank you, for the present. This is what i wanted from you. I guess.."

You smiled fondly at him. He has always been just a hot roommate to you although he's actually attractive in many ways, but you might really, really like him more than you thought.

"You know what?" You get up on your elbow, "you were always loud when you jerked off."

Oh.

Oh, he's freaking out.

"And that's.. with you almost every time calling my name.."

He's swearing in his head.

Mark lee, aren't you just too obvious?

[yawnzzznnn]

requesting prompt 5.)Kiss? you want a Kiss? with riku please <3

✮Bored Teasing - Riku✮

✮Special Thank too: Anon, Riku, NCT WISH

✮Note: slightly oc Riku, sorry if it's terrible my mental health has been plummetting lately, I just really need comfort

✮CW: kisses : teasing : slightly oc Riku : food : drinks :

✮Taglist: no one yet but if you wanna join just lemme know

✮Prompt: 5.) Kiss? You want a kiss?

3-13-24

You and Riku sat comfortably on your couch, him having come over for peace away from the loud dorm he was living in. Snacks scattered about the coffee table, as well as trash from snacks and drinks y'all had previously eaten. Your legs thrown over Riku's lap as you sat sideways, Riku's hands busy themselves with yours, slightly twisting your finger every now and then leaving a small peck on your knuckles.

"Riku" you spoke softly taking your foot, pressing it on his thigh. A small hum left his mouth as he stared lazily at the TV, the movie being played lost both your interests long ago. Instead of responding with words you made a small kiss sound, Riku looked over confused "hm?" In response you once again made the small kiss sound, after a few seconds Riku seemed to have understood.

Giggling softly he shook his head no, your neutral bored face contorted into a confused pout, "why?" Your eyes asked, once again Riku shook his head no "nuh-uh, it's your turn to give the kiss" Riku said making up a lame excuse, "what? Riku, we don't go by turns and you know that" you spoke, snatching your hand from his as you crossed your arm, swinging your legs off his lap you face infront of you.

Riku's quiet giggles turned into slightly disturbing cackles, "no? I think we should" he spoke, tease lacing his words. You scoffed "Riku! Come on, I don't do this to you when you want a kiss" your said, your pout forming into a frown, Riku laughed leaning closer to your ear as he spoke lowly "kiss? You want a kiss?" He teased, sneaking his hands between your folded arms as he pulled them apart setting them to your side, he carefully situated you so your facing him. "Don't be a baby about it" he teased more.

Before you could protest he gently put his lips on yours, your previous train of thought ending, falling into the abyss of Riku, after what felt like an eternity Riku pulled away, "happy?" He asked smoothing your hair down, in response you nodded laying yourself back in his lap with a small smile on your face.

[writtenbymkl]

texting mark “i’m breaking up with you”

featuring: idol!mark x fem!reader

genre: comedy, seriousness for like 0.1 nanosecond

a/n: i’m gonna do all the dreamies for this going from oldest to youngest so here’s mark first, just because he’s the easiest to do :-) renjun will either be later or tmr 🤫 thank you for reading, as always !! <3

[acescavern]

GAME OVER - LEE JENO X READER

GAME OVER

Navi - m.list

Pairing: Lee Jeno x Fem! Reader

Theme: Hint at college au! This is the same paring from my fic ‘Quiet’, fluff, smut, hint of angst? Crack maybe?

Synopsis: When your boyfriend invites you over to his place only to ignore you to play games with his friends all evening, you decide to go out and celebrate a mutual friend’s birthday instead. Jeno never minds when you go out to clubs and bars… only when a specific Loverboy doesn’t tend to leave your side all evening. 

Warnings: Lots of swearing, Probably over use of many variations of ‘fuck’, Big dick! Jeno, Pierced! Jeno, Possessive!Jeno, A hint of angst?, Jealousy, Jaehyun clearly likes you allot regardless of your boyfriend, He’s kind of a subtle dick?, the reader and Jeno are sort of in an argument, Unprotected sex, Exhibitionism ( They fuck in the restrooms and Jaehyun is outside), fluff at the end, Jeno is a smug little shit, marking,  idk what else. 

Word count: 2,698

Note: Hey my lovelies, another Jeno fic! I’m going to attempt to have all the NCT fics I write to be in the same universe. So, when Set Me Free is released it will fall in with this fic too even though it’s Intern!Mark. I know I said that last Jeno smut would be the one and only smut i do but honestly when inspiration strikes - you just gotta. I made the dividers and the header on Canva. Feel free to send asks about my fic characters. The spice is very brief in this one, i apologise - I didn’t want the smut to be too detailed. It's still my longest of the three i've published so far. I feel like my 'writing rust' is curing slowly? I apologise for any grammatical errors

Reblogs and feedback are appreciated! 

“Are you sure the exit is covered, Mark?” Jeno heard through the device in his ear. 

“For the last time, Yes,” Mark grumbled in exasperation, as he scanned the surroundings. 

Jeno could only chuckle, observing from his characters spot on a nearby rooftop. His thumb slowly moved the left analog stick to change the camera angle and look around once more. “Chenle, on your left - there’s Hyuc-” He abruptly called out, voice raising with the excitement.

“What? Fucking whe- Shit!” Jeno had to pull one of his earphones out at the enraged screech that followed, Chenle shouting for Renjun to come and revive him. 

One game soon turned into two, then three, and now four. And it was as if Jeno had forgotten all about you for the moment. You, who was sprawled out on your back, boredly counting each line of profanity you heard your boyfriend boom down his mic. This wasn’t what you had in mind when Jeno asked you to come over after class. You’d hoped that he would opt out of squad night and spend some alone time with you - seeing as you hadn’t really had much time to yourselves since way before the camping trip last month, and whilst you loved his friends like family there was only so much of their company you could take.

You lazily picked your phone up from the floor, responding to a few messages until you hovered over the most recent one. “Coming out tonight? It’s Xiaojun’s birthday.” Your thumbs hesitated in typing out a reply, chin tilting to glance over at your boyfriend, who showed zero signs of stopping his game. As you stood, your knees and ankles groaned in protest from being sprawled out on the fuzzy rug for hours. 

“Jen..” You called out, shoulders slumping when the other didn’t respond. “Jen!” You repeated louder, unable to keep the hint of annoyance from your voice. Jeno jumped, he would never admit it but he almost forgot you were there. He removed an earphone, muting his mic to turn toward you. 

“Yes, Baby?” He hummed, raising a pierced brow. He hadn’t caught on to the clear boredom in your expression, nor the dejected tone to your voice as you spoke again. 

“I’m gonna head out, Ten invited me out for Xiaojun’s birthday.” You explained, Jeno’s eyes creasing at the corners as he smiled at the mention of the two. 

“Make sure Ten don’t go home with Johnny again.” Was all he said, already beginning to turn back to his computer. 

You couldn’t believe that was all he said, he didn’t even offer to go with you nor drop you off. You stood there for a moment, left eye almost twitching in anger at the whole situation. You weren’t a clingy girlfriend, you never demanded to be with Jeno all the time. It was quite the opposite actually, but there were times when he acted like this and it got to you. All you wanted was some one on one time.. 

Deciding to forego the impending argument for tonight, you shuffled closer to him to press a kiss to his forehead so you didn’t disturb his game. “You’re coming back here, right?” he mumbled, not even waiting your answer properly before a harsh “You fuck head, Hyuck!” escaped him. 

With a mumbled ‘sure’, you gathered your bag and left him to it.

Jeno hadn’t even realised how he was acting. He still continued gaming with the guys for at least two or three more hours. He stretched his arms above his head on a groan, clicking his spine as he twisted in his chair. “Mark, pick another game. This one’s getting too easy to beat you at.” He snickered smugly. 

“You seen Hendery’s story, Jen?” The voice sounded almost devious. As if Jaemin was in on a secret nobody else was. 

Instead of answering, his hand swiped up his phone from beside his keyboard and swiftly unlocked it with his thumb. Jeno found Hendery’s profile and tapped on the story. His eyebrows shot up to his hairline. It was you, Xiaojun and Jaehyun. The later, Jeno wasn’t particularly a big fan of… okay that was a massive understatement. Quite frankly, Jeno hated the way the man looked at you. He knew Jaehyun had asked you out a few times, before you and Jeno had gone public, and whilst he knew you turned him down everytime… he also was very much aware of how persistent the older man could be. Not that Jeno didn’t trust you, he trusted you with his life but Jaehyun however? No.

Jeno’s gaze drifted over your frame in the picture, his breath drawing in sharply. “Fuck me…” he cursed. The dress you were wearing had him frozen in place. 

A short little black number, ending way too high up your thighs for his liking. Jeno could clearly see from your side pose that it was backless, the halter strings of the dress tied in a perfect bow at the back of your neck. The front? Jeno couldnt even think about the front right now, not when he could clearly see Jaehyun’s eyes were definitely not directed toward the camera lens. 

“Bro… you must have done something terrible in your past life.” His friend Donghyuck laughed into his ear. “The dude’s looking at her as if he won a fucking jackpot!” 

“Say’s the bitchless one.” Jisung quipped, adding on a rushed defense. “Not that ___’s a bitch, Jeno.” 

Jeno could only groan in despair. “What am I meant to do? I don’t even know what club she’s a-” 

“Envy. It’s written on the cup, Dumbass.” Jeno glared at his friends icon on the call, then glancing back to the image and sure enough, the black cup in your hand had the club logo printed on the side. “Jeno, you’re designated driver.. And who else.. Mark?”

Mark let out an unsure sound of agreement. “Uh.. yeah, sure. I’m not staying though, got work early in the morning and this internship is kicking my ass. I’ll drop you at the door and pick you up but that’s it.” 

Jeno was silently seething, continuing to tap through Hendery’s story as his friends made arrangements. In each one of them, the same guy was always with you. Even when you weren’t in the photograph, Jeno caught sight of you both in the background and with new determination, he shucked off his hoodie to get ready. 

You were having a good time. Much better than being ignored by your boyfriend, that’s for sure. Part of you still wished you'd put your foot down and demanded Jeno pay attention to you. He was the one who asked you to go over after all. But, you much preferred dancing with your friends over causing arguments with Jeno.

You were dancing with Ten and Jaehyun when you first spotted the familiar head of black and pink streaked hair. The grinning man approaching the three of you the moment he caught sight. 

“Chenle? What are you doing here?” You shouted over the music, eyebrows drawn in confusion. 

Honestly, you could probably count on one hand the amount of times you’d seen Chenle make an appearance at a night club. The younger shrugged with faux innocence, his grin broadening as his gaze caught sight of someone over your shoulder. 

“Ask him.” He simply stated, with the nudge forward of his head being a signal for you to probably turn around. 

From the way the colour drained from Jaehyun’s face, however, you weren’t sure you wanted to. You could physically feel the anger radiating from the person behind you - You were 100% certain who it was. It was solidified when a hard chest pressed against your back, hot breath against your ear. 

“Yeah, ____. Ask me.” You’d never experience this Jeno yet. This Jeno was mad, His voice sharp and heavy, the emotion making it slightly husky. 

Chenle only grinned wider, shooting you a thumbs up as he coaxed your friends to the bar. You didn’t face your boyfriend yet. Unsure of what you might see, if his voice was anything to go by you’d probably fold in thirty seconds flat. Jeno has a special talent in making you fold. Instead, you crossed your arms over your chest, straightening your shoulders. How dare he come and crash your fun? After he ignored you for so many hours. 

“Finally remembered you have a girlfriend then?” Was your snarky reply. 

You were so glad you weren’t looking at him, from the way a tense silence followed your words. Honestly, you stupidly thought you’d made him speechless. A smirk tugging at the corners of your glossy lips. The triumph didn’t last for long, the victory slowly fading from your face at the almost sinister chuckle. 

“Could say the same about you.” Jeno’s clipped tone bit right back, his strong hands settling on your waist. “Someone should tell Jung fucking Yoon-Oh to get his own girlfriend and stop making googly eyes at mine.” Your boyfriend’s gravelly voice rumbled into your ear. 

That made you step forward, Jeno’s hands falling away from your waist before he could tighten his hold to stop you. Your mouth opened to speak but your words got stuck in your throat. There he stood, Pink hair swept back in probably the only style he knows how to do himself, black skinny jeans and a dress shirt with only the bottom few buttons done up to leave it open to the bottom of his sternum. He looked mouth watering. You could feel your resolve crumbling bit by bit. 

“He-He didn’t touch me.” You choked out. “He’s just a friend, Jen.” 

Your voice didn’t sound like you, it was breathy and low but somehow he heard you. Jeno’s facial features were set in a hard line, stormy with jealousy, the constant flashing lights around you reflecting off his eyebrow piercing. His jaw flexed. 

“To you, yes. But to him? Baby, when you showed up here looking like fucking aphrodite in that dress… he probably thought it was his birthday.” He said tautly. 

You didn’t have anything to say to that. You couldn’t dispel Jeno’s worries either. Whilst you had definitely noticed how the man in question hadn’t left you alone all night, you’d done nothing to try and put any distance toward you. Your anger at your boyfriend had clouded your judgement -  your mind telling you that Jaehyun was just acting as a comforting friend and listening ear. Though with the amount of times he’s still asked you out and the amount of ‘jokes’ he makes hinting at you being ‘too good’ for Jeno, you can’t say you blame your boyfriend for his blatant dislike. In his defense, Jeno had voiced his insecurities surrounding the man many times to you and you knew it was something he was very much bothered about. 

At the thought, your anger dissipated like a deflating balloon. If you’d just spoken to Jeno in the first place then you probably wouldn’t be in this situation. The apology died on your lips when both sides of your face was firmly cupped and Jeno leant in. His nose brushing yours as his almost possessive gaze met your startled one. 

“Mine. ____ you’re mine.” He spoke through gritted teeth, his statement firm. You didn’t disagree anyway. 

“Only yours.” Your instant reply had his shoulder relaxing only slightly. 

The tension was thick and neither of you had leant away. It was as if a rubber band had snapped when your lips met, hungry and claiming. Hands all over each other desperate to find purchase.

That was how you found yourself in your current state. Pressed against the locked door to the club restroom with your dress bunched around your waist. Your high heels dug into the backs of Jeno’s thighs as each hard drive forward thudded your back louder against the wood. Jeno couldn't help but admire your smudged lip gloss, the rest of which he was sure to be smeared along his neck, the base of his cock, and his own lips. Eyeliner and mascara streaked further down your cheeks with each pleasured sob. 

Jeno’s firm grip on your thighs hoisted you against the door, he made no effort at all to silence your cries and moans. He didn’t want to this time. You were his and right now he really hoped Jaehyun was waiting outside for the restrooms to be unoccupied. With a deep moan of his own, his teeth reattached to your neck. It was as if he thought the bruises he marred your skin with would have faded in the last thirty seconds, his teeth pulling at the skin over them. 

“Say it again, Baby. Please.” He uttered breathlessly, delivering a particularly firm thrust.

Your words were incoherent, you may aswell have been babbling total nonsense. This man had filled you to the brim, pounding the same spot over and over enough for you to see stars.  An elongated whine left you, fingernails gripping at Jeno’s back underneath his shirt. Your thighs shook in his hands. 

“Yours. Jen-no! Always… Always yours.” You cried out, almost letting out a scream when he tilted your hips for the right angle. 

“Oh god… oh g-god!” Your sobs were like music to his ears, your pleas and praises fuelling his speed. 

Jeno lifted his head, sweat beading his brow as he kissed away your tears. His chest was flushed red from exertion. You tried to hold on longer, you really did but your orgasm crashed down on you almost abruptly, dragging a filthy, loud, wanton moan of his name from your throat. 

“Shit…” Jeno swore as you clamped down around him almost in a death grip, prompting his own release. 

You felt like your whole body was twitching in the aftershocks. You almost flinched at the sensitivity of Jeno’s piercing dragging against your sensitive parts as he slowly pulled out. The both of you were panting heavily like you’d run a London marathon. You made no effort to move and clean up yet, opting to draw Jeno’s torso into your body in a tight embrace. 

“I’m sorry for playing on your insecurities.” You admitted sheepishly into his ear. “I was just so annoyed.” 

A soft hum in reply was heard, the sound still lightly vibrating his chest. “Why were you annoyed?” 

“You invited me over to just ignore me for hours. I just wanted some quality time with you.” Your confession had Jeno’s mind clicking everything into place. 

“Oh… I didn’t think of it like that. ____ I just always want you around. I hate it when you go back to your apartment.” He lifted his head from where it was nuzzled comfortably against your marked chest. 

Your tongue darted out to nervously wet your lips, your right shoulder lazily lifting in thought. “Okay…” You started off, slowly. “Then… What if I didn’t?” You offered tentatively.

Jeno didn’t say anything as he processed your words, his lips pulling into the first smile he had directed at you all evening. “Then… I’d clear out half of the closet space for you… maybe get you a key cut.” 

“I’d like that.” His smile was contagious as hell, the corners of your mouth pulling up into an expression to match his own. 

Jeno quickly cleaned you both up after that with a mutual agreement that you should both go home and shower. His large hand wrapped tightly in your own. You both looked a disheveled mess, your panda eyes and his wrinkled shirt and messy hair. However, you’d made yourselves presentable enough to make it to the car. His free hand twisted the lock on the door, pulling it open to the stunned faces of your friends. None of them said anything but judging from the smirks and snickers, you’d surely get drilled in the group chat later. 

One face stuck out to Jeno amongst them all. The one closest to the door. The number one cause for his possessive streak this evening and whilst you were off saying goodbye to your friends, Jeno leaned in slightly for only Jaehyun to hear him. 

“Game Over, Loverboy.”

[haechwrites]

wingwoman - L.MK

mark x fem!reader ft. jaemin

synopsis: mark has trouble pulling girls. he also has trouble understanding girls. this makes sense when he asks the best friend of his crush for help when it's blatantly obvious she's actually in love with him.

wc: ~9.5k

warnings: none??? unrequited love. mark is clueless. reader is a coward hehe. based in college. i say fem!reader bc they use she/her pronouns and refer to her as a "wingwoman," but honestly can be read as gender neutral?? ORIGINALLY WRITTEN IN FIRST PERSON, so ignore mistakes pls

A/N: my first published work woot woot i've had this written and sitting for so long. i love unrequited love and angst. this isn't that angsty but maybe if i get sad enough, i can write an angstier one! okay byeee

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“You like him, don’t you?”

The mayo from your sandwich made a cartoonish splat onto the plate at the end of his question. Your head snapped over, looking at Jaemin incredulously for his unexpected inquiry. You were in the middle of a lovely meal with Mark in between classes. When Jaemin sat down to join halfway, You didn’t expect him to have an agenda in mind. You placed your sandwich down and checked to see how far Mark had gotten before you could speak. He had lost a round of rock, paper, scissors and was sent to buy drinks.

“What are you talking about?” You cleared your throat of whatever was left of your lunch. You knew exactly who and what he was talking about but you prayed it was something else. You didn’t want to have this discussion. Things could be laid out on this table that you're not yet ready to process, and not with Jaemin of all people. It’s not like you and Jaemin aren’t close. You're just both the same kind of person, the type of person who doesn’t like to express their feelings. So it was odd that Jaemin was even asking about your personal life.

“Mark. You like him, right?“ He raised a single eyebrow, tempting you to deny his claim. How could he admit your feelings so easily when it’s something you've been struggling to grasp for a month?

You wiped the crumbs off your hands onto your jeans, and maybe some nervous sweat too.

“No. I mean. He likes Jenn.” You stated it like it was the most obvious thing in the world, trying hard to make it seem like that fact didn’t bother you. You automatically looked down and start picking at the crumbs.

Jaemin hummed, “I asked if you like him. Not who he likes. I know who he likes.” 

The last statement felt like a stab in the chest, because, of course, you do too. Mark likes your roommate, your friend since high school. That was the only reason you were sitting at this table, the only reason you were able to have this conversation with one of his best friends. If he didn’t reach out to you during your Anatomy class together about helping him get with your friend, you wouldn’t even be here in this situation right now. At first, you were honestly offended by his request. However, after seeing the charm he very much lacked, you understood why he was desperate. It was a pitiful acceptance, but you wish you never agreed. Being reminded of your purpose in his life always tore you apart because Jaemin’s assumption is right; you do like Mark. 

Maybe that slight bitterness in your heart is what pushed you to confess to Jaemin, one of Mark’s friends and not the man himself. You took another quick glance at Mark to see him fumbling with his change at the vending machine to get you a drink. You couldn’t help but smile fondly at him and quickly realize how screwed you are. Jaemin followed your eyes and smiled to himself knowing he was right. It wasn’t difficult to figure out. The only person that didn’t know was Mark, and maybe Jenn.

You sighed and turned back to him, a month of feelings bursting at your lips.

“Okay, fine. I like Mark. But I swear to you, I’m not going to do anything. It literally doesn’t matter. He likes Jenn and I’m helping him pursue Jenn. I know I’m an idiot for getting my feelings tangled up in all of this, but I really care for Mark, so I’m not gonna let something as stupid as this get in the way of that. I’m gonna keep helping him and if I get to continue being his friend after they get together, great! But if our relation-friendship ends there, then that’s also fine. It-“ You hesitated, looking at the pity and confusion on Jaemin’s face. “It’s completely fine,” You said quieter, the weight of your ramble finally hitting you. You didn’t realize how pathetic this whole situation was till your thoughts left your head and were actually voiced. 

Jaemin made a sound of disapproval, getting ready to speak before a can of Milkis was placed in front of your plate.

“What’d I miss?” Mark asked, swiftly sliding his body onto the bench. “I cleaned the top already,” He says, tapping your drink.

You smiled with gratitude, before quickly snapping back into wing woman mode. Like it was second nature.

“Jenn wants to catch a movie this weekend, wanna come? Maybe bring Jeno or Jaemin,” your eyes flickered to the man that just watched you word-vomit your inner thoughts. “So it’s less sus, you know?” 

Mark’s eyes lit up immediately, the smile on his face lifting his cheekbones to match the pure joy in his eyes. The green in you only faltered your smile slightly. When has he ever smiled like that for me?, you thought.

“Jaem, what do you say? Wanna come?” Mark asked.

Jaemin looked at you as you avoided his eyes. He took a big bite of his food before saying, “I’d rather not.” 

Mark instantly pouted and slapped Jaemin’s arms multiple times, whining that it’d be fun. Jaemin continued taking bites of his food, unfazed by Mark’s slaps and silently refusing. You giggled at the sight, but something in your stomach felt uneasy now that Jaemin knows. 

Everyone continued finishing up their meals and Mark asked you about this weekend and what movies Jenn likes. You took a sip of your drink and let the carbonation burn your throat. Hopefully, your abrupt confession helps you in this predicament. Having at least one person know would be good, right?

You peered up at Jaemin and his eyes were trained strictly on you, sending goosebumps down your arms. 

Maybe not.

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A month has passed since your confession to Jaemin and two and a half months have passed since Operation Jump Jenn began — name courtesy of Haechan, objectively not his best work but you got outvoted. Ever since you started hanging out with Mark and helping out with his love life situation, your friend groups began to merge and you all grew extremely close. It feels like you're known the boys since birth, despite meeting only this year. Due to this and because everyone is all in on Operation Jump Jenn, a camping trip was planned together — more like “glamping” because tents were swapped for a nice cabin. The goal was to get Mark and Jenn some alone time whether it be on a hike or by the campfire. Haechan said they should go as far as making them share a bed, but he quickly earned a smack in the head from Renjun. 

The crew had just arrived at the cabin this morning and scurried into the rooms they self-assigned, or should you say argued over, in the car ride up. You obviously got put with Jenn and your friend, Sumin, while the boys fought over who could sleep with Renjun. Surprisingly, Jeno came out victorious.

“Okay, I’m done! I’m gonna go help the boys figure out groceries,” Jenn got up and brushed the dust off her pants.

“Oh, you’ll need backup,” Sumin laughed and trailed after her, leaving you alone in your shared room.

You took your time unpacking just because driving partially took a lot out of you. The bed was looking extra nap-able. Your body soreness also probably came from craning your neck so much to look at Mark and Jenn in the backseat. It was torturous, but you couldn’t look away. It was like self-sabotage.

A light knock on the door caught your attention and you told the person to come in. It was Mark.

Not even trying to hide the immediate smile on your face, you got up off the floor. 

“Hey, did you unpack already?”

“Haechan owes me for something, so I made him do it for me.” He sighs happily before plopping onto the bed, basking in his zero responsibilities.

You scoffed and smacked his thigh, “You’re wearing your outside clothes!” You log rolled him over to his side but he quickly positioned himself back.

“All we did was drive,” he whined. “I think our clothes should be relatively clean.” He patted the empty spot next to him. You obviously obliged.

You leaned over to him and jokingly sniffed, “Yeah, but you smell a little.”

Mark mocked offense and grabbed you by the shoulders to pull you into a tight hug, laughing evilly at your cries.

“Then get a gooood smell,” He trapped you in, shaking you around. You pretended to cough on his odor and he gasped. Mark pulled back to look at your face and you were already laughing. 

He gave a light flick to your forehead, “Jerk.”

You simply smiled, shoving him away from you before the butterflies in your stomach could get even worse. You had to take a deep breath just to calm down and remind yourself of your place. 

“When we have to grocery shop later, you should volunteer with Jenn. She’s already making the list so I’m sure she’ll wanna take over the shopping part as well.” With your eyes trained on the ceiling, the advice just flowed naturally out of you like always. You laid there expecting him to jump up at the idea. 

Mark propped his head up with his elbow and looked at you from the side, “I’m kinda tired.”

You rolled your eyes, “You’re stupid. You gotta take every opportunity you can get. Jenn’s a little tough to break through and get to know. She’s shy, remember?” You poked his nose and he scrunched at you.

“True,” he pouted. Mark reached over to grab a strand that came loose from your bun after he practically strangled you. He gently brushed it aside and you felt your whole body freeze. Two attacks in one day? Your poor heart.

You cleared your throat and shot up. You grabbed his hand and yanked him with you, to which he instantly groaned. 

“C’monnn, let’s goooo,” you pleaded, shaking his arm. “I don’t have the energy to pull you up.” 

He used both hands to grab your arm and pulled himself up, leaving you both face to face. You instantly took a step back, frazzled once again. Mark was never good at hiding his facial expressions. It was what made getting close to him so easy. You felt like you could read his mind, and sometimes you dive deeper than he expects. He looked at you a little confused by your distance and you simply gave his arm a squeeze, not wanting to look too suspicious. He smiled. 

Mark naturally wrapped his arm around your shoulders to pull you closer and walked the two of you out of the room, “Let’s gooo.” 

If he could read you the way you read him, you're sure he’d push you away.

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Scrubbing hard at the dishes, you cursed myself for being so bad at rock, paper, scissors. Yes, it’s a game of luck, but you must have the worst luck in the world to always lose to Lee Haechan. You could hear him snickering at the dining table behind you, smacking on the marshmallows they were about to roast. 

“Haechan! Stop snacking and bring those outside,” Jaemin snapped, coming in to bring in more dishes from dinner. 

“Yessir!” Haechan mocked a salute and scrambled outside to where Mark and Jenn were setting up the campfire. Jeno and Sumin were looking for more firewood and Renjun went to take a post-dinner nap. 

Jaemin bumped you with his hip, scooting you over as he started rinsing your dishes.

“You’re helping?” you asked, shocked that someone would willingly wash dishes. 

“Should I stop?” He smiles, threatening to let go of the plate.

“No! No. No. I appreciate the help.” 

Jaemin laughs, “That’s what I thought.”

You both stand there quietly washing what felt like millions of dishes. Spending time alone with Jaemin was never uncomfortable, but there were always moments when your mind gets in the way and you think about what he knows. 

It’s like he can read your thoughts because he suddenly asks, “Is this trip gonna be okay for you?“

Suddenly hyper-focused on the crust of the pan, you didn’t dare make eye contact with him. 

“What do you mean?”

Jaemin takes the pan from you and starts scrubbing himself. You instantly occupy yourself with another dish.

He sighs, “I mean, usually when we set the two up, we’re never actually there to witness how it goes. It must suck to watch them laugh and be happy like that.” His words burn.

You hiss at the realization and almost drop the cup you were gripping. Jaemin tuts and grabs the cup from your hand. His hand on your wrist is tight, begging you to look up. You chew on your inner cheek, hesitantly lifting your eyes to match his. 

“It’s only the first day, but we have a whole week. If you ever need to get away from all of this, you find me, okay?” The brown in his eyes is warm and inviting, and his facial structures soften when he’s talking to you. He’s chewing on his bottom lip and you could see how nervous he is for you. You slowly release his grip from your wrist and you hold his hand lightly.

“Thank you, Jaem. But I’ll be okay. I’ve made it this far,” You meekly smile. Your eyes darted to the side of his face to look outside the window where Jenn is throwing marshmallows up in the air for Mark to catch. He looks so happy. Maybe even in love. And that look wasn’t for you. The ache in your chest returns and you hope Jaemin doesn’t catch on. You don’t know what it is that made you so sensitive in this moment, but your vision blurred slightly with tears. 

“You sure about that?” He teases, wiping the tear that managed to slip. 

“You’re gonna get soap in my eyes,” you scowl, but laugh at how pathetic you're being. He gently blows the suds off your face and you could feel them being replaced with a peachy rose tint on your cheeks.

“C’mon, let’s hurry. They’re gonna eat all the marshmallows and your terrible scrubbing is slowing me down. Jesus, Y/N, I’m finding so many missed food spots.”

Your jaw dropped and you scrubbed harder, “It’s dark in here and my arms are tired from driving! Leave me alone.”

Jaemin looks at you from his peripheral to see you practically scrubbing the varnish off the plates and he smiles. He hopes you'll be okay, but also a part of him hopes you'll seek comfort in him if needed. Was that too much or too selfish to wish for?

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For the rest of the glamping days, you're unintentionally glued to Jaemin’s side. Every activity planned for this trip ended up with you being paired up with him: paddle boarding, hiking, cliff jumping, grilling, and so on. Every partner assignment was decided by rock, paper, scissors, and somehow the two of you kept doing the same one. Some would say it's fate, but Jaemin would call it cheating. He was lucky that Renjun hasn’t caught him changing his hands last minute to copy yours. Truth be told, Jeno noticed a while ago, but decided to let his best friend have his fun. 

The universe likes to play its games too. And that’s how you ended up being partnered with Mark for canoeing. You almost fought it till you saw how happy Jenn was to canoe with Sumin. Mark simply shrugged and grabbed two life vests for you guys.

He offered to strap it in for you and you were looking at everything but his face. Unfortunately, you could still feel the steady rhythm of his breath catching up to the racing of your heart. 

“I feel like I haven’t talked to you in ages,” Mark said to break the ice. It was true though. Your wing woman duties on this trip were basically minimal as the group joined efforts to get the two together at all costs. It took a lot off of you and you were happily distracted by Jaemin. 

“I bet you got a lot of talking done with Jenn though.” you gave him a closed mouth smile, trying to find the positives of your distance, for his sake and yours.

Mark looked at you with anything but happiness. Shouldn’t he be happy? At this rate, Jenn and he are close to making it official. 

“I just missed you,” Mark stated like he was releasing air from his lungs. You had your shield up and you were ready to combat it with another sentence about how well his love life is looking. But you saw the look in his eyes and the way his body looked defeated. You tightened the strap on his life jacket and patted over his heart.

“I missed you too,” you replied. It was something you weren't letting yourself admit this entire week. Like fireworks, a smile instantly erupted on his face and he grabbed your hands from his straps, giving your palm a swift kiss before dragging you to your boat.

Your insides screamed at his gesture and your legs failed to move as you stumbled after him. It was like you were in a Mark drought and he was the single drop of water you needed to beg for more. 

The remaining of the afternoon was spent paddling in circles and laughing till your throats were dry at your horrible rowing skills. An oar was even lost in the process. Mark also clumsily fell in while trying to reach for a duck. Being the good person you are, you jumped in after him so he wasn’t alone. Admittedly, it looked more fun than sitting in one place on the canoe. 

Mark cackled at the life jacket forcing you to bob up and down in the water, making you look like a little kid drowning. 

“You look so stupid,” he says in the middle of laughing, accidentally swallowing some lake water.

“Jerk!” you splashed him and he’s sputtering, trying to get the taste out of his mouth. His jaw drops when he realized what you did and he looks at you so seriously. Your hands are ready to splash him again and the water fight begins. You're hurling water toward each other for a good five minutes before he concedes, whining about potentially losing a contact. 

You swim towards him, grabbing his face to check his eyes. His contacts were very clearly still intact. You're about to call him out for lying when he suddenly spits water onto your face. 

“Marcus Lee.” you threaten him, still holding onto his face. Your eyes are shut in disgust. 

You wipe the water off your face and open your eyes to see him grinning evilly. 

“That’s not even my name,” Mark giggles.

“‘Mark Lee’ doesn’t have the same impact,” you shrug, moving your hands to his shoulders to stay afloat. 

He smiles fondly, holding onto your elbows lightly. The feeling in his chest felt as good as the sun resting on his backside. The warmth of the sunset reflected off your lake-soaked cheeks, plump from laughing, and something stirred in his chest. Something a little too similar to the feeling he was forcing when he was with Jenn. It was the feeling Mark had wished he felt when with her. 

Scared of this new emotion, he let go of you and scrambled to climb back into the canoe. He quickly mumbled about wanting to get back before it got dark. You floated there a little confused by his urgency, but followed suit anyways. He tossed you a towel and out of nowhere gained the skills of a professional rower and got you back to the shore in no time. Without even looking back, he trudged towards the cabin, leaving you with the setting sun, cold and confused.

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“So he just left you there?” Renjun asks, scrolling through Netflix to pick a show to watch. It was just the two of you since the rest were too tired from today’s activities.

“Mhmm. It was so weird.” 

“I can check up on him in the morning since he’s asleep now. But he probably just had the shits. You know Mark.” He finally settled on an episode of New Girl.

You took a sip of your hot cocoa and pondered the chances. “Mmm true.”

Renjun laughs at your agreement and grabbed a blanket for the both of you.

“But you both had fun, right?” He asks, not really paying attention to the show at all. It seemed like he just wanted to talk and you were fine with that.

“Yeah, I mean we didn’t spend much time together this trip which is pretty rare for us. But you know, The Operation takes priority,” you took another sip to clear the knot that suddenly formed in your throat.

“You probably missed him a loooot, huh?” Renjun hid his smirk behind the mug.

“A normal amount… what are you grabbing at?“ you narrowed your eyes at him and leaned back, surveying his body language. He looked like he was holding something in.

“Oh my god,” he bursts. “Can you just tell me already?” He sets his cup down and grabs your forearms.

“Huh? Tell you what?” Where is this coming from?, you think. You set your cup down too out of precaution.

“I’m not stupid, Y/N. I know you like him, so I need you to confirm it so we can talk freely,” he waved his hands in the air like he was a therapist trying to get you to spill. You almost laughed at how ridiculous he looked.

Your hand slapped against his mouth and you did a quick look around the room. No peeping heads.

“How did you figure it out?“ you whisper-screamed. You could feel the very foundation of Mark's and your friendship crumble. 

“Imph phnot phstupidmph,” He muffles out.

“Huh?” You question stupidly and he glares at you, sharply pointing at your hand. “Oh, duh.”

Renjun clears his throat, “I said I’m not stupid. And considering how much time Jaemin has been spending with you, I’m guessing he knows too.” You look at the wall behind his head, feeling guilty.

“I don’t know why you would tell him before me though. We were lab buddies first before you met Jaemin. Not fair, Y/N.” He huffs, crossing his arms. If the security of your love life wasn’t falling apart at this very moment, you would’ve found him endearing.

“Do you think anyone else has figured it out?” you ask.

“No, I’m like the only smart one,” Renjun scoffs.

“Wrong!” A voice booms from the hallway. Haechan walks in yawning, fully decked out in a matching set of pajamas. He takes a swig from Renjun’s hot cocoa, earning him a smack. 

He sits down to your right and smiles, “I found out like 2 weeks after you and Mark met.” 

“Damn, you found out before Jaemin did,” You admitted. Not even shocked or worried that a third person knows, You sat there dumbfounded.

“Yesss!” Haechan pumps the air and proceeds to take another sip but this time from your cup. You tsked and gave him a flick before grabbing your mug back.

“Okay, so now what?” Renjun asks like there was more to this.

You furrowed your eyebrows, “What do you mean ‘now what’?”

Haechan doesn’t even look surprised but Renjun is staring at you like you offended him.

“You’re just… not gonna do anything? Ignore your feelings?” Haechan nodded along with Renjun’s questioning. The angel and the devil on your shoulders, or should I say devil and devil.

“Renjunie, that’s what I’ve been doing, I don’t know if you’ve noticed. I’m the wing woman. I’d be betraying my duty.” You said this like a mantra, a mantra you're been telling yourself for the past few months.

“What about the duty to your heart?” 

“Gross,” Haechan chimes in. It earned a scrunch of your nose and a weird look. 

“I regretted it the minute I said it,” Renjun slouches defeatedly. 

“Look, I appreciate the concern. Jaemin gives me these talks all the time, and trust me, it won’t change my mind. I love Mark too much to get in the way of his happiness. And all for what? Because I have these feelings? That’s ridiculous.” 

Haechan and Renjun looked at you with even more pity in their eyes, which is more than you usually see from Jaemin.

“What?”

“It’s worse than I thought,” Haechan whispers.

“You love him.”

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On the morning of the last day, you notice Mark is avoiding you at all costs. He’s even avoiding Jenn. Everyone was packing up the car and he completely took over, not letting anyone touch the luggage or the car. You tugged Renjun to the side to ask what was up and he simply shrugged, saying he doesn’t know what was going on. 

When you all make your first pitstop, You and Jaemin are buying snacks for the group. You see Mark staying in the driver’s seat, claiming that he can go the whole way. Both of you give each other concerned looks and Jaemin says he has an idea.

His idea ended up being you switching places with Haechan to sit in the passenger seat, much to his complaints about getting car sick. He does not get motion sick, by the way, especially as the man who has ridden all the rides at Six Flags not once, but twice in one day. 

The only time Mark looks at you is to see you climb into the passenger seat. From then on, his grip on the wheel is tight and his eyes are trained on the road. You even offer to do directions for him, but he immediately declines. His cold behavior leaves a weird feeling blooming in your chest and you almost feel sick, regretting the decision to buy a gas station hot dog.

A few hours passed and Haechan and Renjun are knocked out from their endless karaoke and the rest of them followed suit after finally getting some peace and quiet. 

“Hey,” you whisper to Mark. “Mark.”

His eyebrows perk up, maybe not expecting you to initiate conversation. “What’s up?”

“Are you good?”

He nervously twists his hands around the wheel. “Yeah, dude. I’m fine.”

You looked him up and down, not believing him at all. “Then are we good?”

“Why wouldn’t we be?” He says with a hint of offense. You grip the sleeves of your hoodie a little tighter. He’s never talked to you this way. 

“I-I don’t know. You just seem a little off today, that’s all.” You half confessed. He’s more than just a little off. His behavior was making the air tense and you wished Jaemin didn’t convince you to take the front seat. You chose to stare out the window instead.

“Y/N, there’s nothing wrong. I’m just missing my space, okay?” Mark says sternly, giving you the affirmative sign to leave him alone. Tears instantly prick the corner of your eyes at his tone. Mark has always been a cheerful presence in your life so for these words to be spat at you like this… It felt horrible. It felt like his bad mood was your fault. You tug the hood of your jacket up further and you turned away from him even more, not wanting to make it worse.

“Sounds good,” you managed to mutter, popping in your headphones so you didn’t have to hear any more from him.

Mark spares a glance at you and his eyes instantly soften. Something in his chest twists at the way you're turned away from him, in his favorite hoodie. Jaemin is looking from the seat behind; he’s been watching. He sighs and reminds himself to switch places with you at the next pitstop. 

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Finals season hits the minute you all get back from your trip and the only time your group meets up is to study in the library. Mark, who is usually a huge advocate for group studies, is suddenly a solo studier. You haven’t seen him in a week and when you sought out Jenn, she reports the same thing. 

Thankfully and unfortunately, your finals were extra rough this semester and you essentially had no time to worry about him. Occasionally, you'd send him texts with your class notes to check up on him, but all you'd get in response is a simple thumbs up. 

Jaemin decided to change the scenery and study at a cafe near campus. He had two more exams left, but you only had one so you were definitely more relaxed than he was. You ordered a slice of cake and a pastry and munched away as he tackled his workload. You occasionally fed him bites here and there.

An hour into the study session, the food settled in your stomach as well as the repressed feelings about Mark. You twirled your straw as you stared at Jaemin typing, trying to decide if now was a good time to bother him.

“You’re staring,” He says, continuing to type. 

“Yup.” you say, popping your lips. 

“Is my handsomeness not blinding?” He smirks, eyes still on his screen. He wiggles his eyebrows teasingly.

You gag and shove a spoon of cake into his mouth. “Nevermind, no more talking. I don’t wanna throw up the food I paid for.”

He laughs and finally lifts his hands off the keyboard. Jaemin takes a sip of his deadly concoction with eight shots of espresso to wash down the cake and raises his eyebrows.

“You can ask, you know?”

You roll your lips in and tap at the table, suddenly too shy to ask.

“Okay, then I’ll just assume and answer. Mark is… weird. Mark’s not really acting like himself right now if I’m being completely honest,” Jaemin admits. He’s lazily poking his ice with the straw, waiting to see your reaction. 

“Hmm,” you pretend to ponder his words, suddenly struck with worry. Even though you're still hurt by his actions from the ride back and his sudden desire to avoid you for a week, you can’t help but care. It was almost annoying how much you want to text him, despite his lack of interest in you. It annoyed Jaemin more.

“Why do you do this to yourself?” 

Your eyes perked up, shocked by Jaemin’s change in tone.

“He dismissed you on the car ride back. He’s ignored you this entire week. He doesn’t even say thank you when you send him your notes. Why-” He shakes his head, aggravated. “Why are you still worrying about him?”

“Jaemin… you know why.”

“Listen, I love Mark like a brother. But he doesn’t deserve you. You’ve done so much for him with this whole Jenn situation, it’s just not fair to you.” Jaemin says this so seriously, you feel frozen in my spot. You’ve probably heard these words leave his mouth a million times, but today it felt different. His words weighed differently. 

“I don’t know what else to do, Jaemin. This is the only thing I can do. It’s the only thing I know how to do.”

“He’s not even appreciative of it!” Jaemin pushes further, growing more desperate to have you hear his words, praying they stick this time. “You don’t need to put yourself through this for his sake.”

You're flattening a piece of the cake with a fork as you actually consider his words. With Mark distancing himself, your mind feels a little clearer, more room for thoughts. 

“I wouldn’t be friends with him in the first place if I didn’t agree to be his wing woman. It’s why I’m in his life in the first place. I’m… I’m too scared to risk it.” 

Jaemin decides he’s had enough and shuts his laptop, too angry to work. “You’re an idiot if you think he’s only keeping you around because you’re close to Jenn. Why do you value yourself so little? Do you think we’re just friends because we’re both in Operation Jump Jenn? No, Y/N. We’re friends because I like you.”

Jaemin sucks in his breath, at his poor word choice; he looks like he’s in pain. If only she knew I meant it differently, he thinks to himself. 

He continues, “So why would Mark, after all this time, not think of you as more than just a wing woman?” 

The area around your eyes sting and you could feel yourself fighting back tears. Your lips tremble, choking back a sob. Jaemin’s eyes widen and his hands twitch wanting to hold yours, but he pulls himself back.

“I still can’t tell him. Things won’t be the same.” 

The look of pity Jaemin usually gives you is replaced by frustration, and maybe some disappointment. You fidget under his stare, tightly wrapping your arms around your waist. He shakes his head.

“Mark doesn’t deserve you if he leaves you after finding out how you feel. You really think he’d do that? Do you think that lowly of him?” He rests his hands on the table and he looks at you, urging you to try to defend yourself. But his words sink deeper. He’s right, do you really think that lowly of Mark?

You sighed in defeat and in exhaustion. You were at a loss for words, having your thoughts psychoanalyzed in front of you. You don’t think lowly of Mark at all. Shouldn’t you have more faith in him? In us?, you think.

“Why do you have to be so smart?” you glare at Jaemin. He immediately relaxes, smiling in return. He was staring at you for so long, trying to figure out what was going on inside your brain. He was on the edge of his seat, terrified that you'd drop him for his candor. Or that you caught on to his little confession.

He shrugs in response, “Pre-med.”

“You’re annoying,” you laugh, giving his foot a kick. Jaemin laughs with you and opens up his laptop again. You both work for another minute before he stops to look up at you again.

“Hey. I’m sorry if I went too far.” Instead of grabbing your hand, he traps one of your legs with his two. He swings it back and forth with a pout on his face, begging for you two to be okay.

“No, no, I needed that. Thank you for looking out for me.” Your chest warms, knowing that you have someone as lovely as Na Jaemin on your side. 

You lean forward and pinch his cheek, “How’d I get so lucky with a friend like you?” 

His face falters for a second before snapping back into a smile. He playfully licks your hand and you pull it back in disgust.

“You got me for life unfortunately.”

“Mmm, unfortunately,” you fake pout. 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

After your talk with Jaemin, it took you embarrassingly two days to figure out what to do next. Mark still isn’t talking to you and as much as it pains you, it’s actually given you the space to think. You finally decided to do something you should’ve done months ago.

“Do you like Mark?”

Jenn chokes on her sandwich and you scramble to hand her a glass of water, patting her shoulder lightly. Maybe you should’ve timed that better.

“Huh?” There was something swirling around in Jenn’s eyes. Confusion. Pure confusion. It was not what you expected at all. 

“I don’t know, do you like Mark?” you repeated, bracing yourself for her answer. 

She looked at you and did a quick once over. Jenn realized you were serious and brushed the crumbs off her hands before settling in her lap. 

“Mark’s cool. He talks a lot. The only reason we hang or talk is because of you and the boys. That’s kind of what it feels like for me and Mark. I don’t know… sometimes his behavior towards me feels forced. I thought he was just acting this way because I’m your best friend.” She took a sip, looking up and thinking about what more she could say about Mark Lee. 

“Wait. What do you mean by that?” The pit in your stomach appears. Did she figure out The Operation?

“Isn’t he just getting on good terms with me because he likes you? I don’t like him, by the way.” Jenn let those words flow out of her mouth as if it was the only thing to say. Like this is how she felt for months. 

“Huh?!” It was your turn to be confused. Never in your friendship with Mark have you considered your feelings being returned. You also never expected it to be implied by the person Mark is literally crushing on. 

“Wait. Was that not obvious? Every time Mark and I hung out, it just felt… like he was looking for something in me. It was strange. I just assumed it was because he wanted to look good in your eyes like ‘Hey! I’m buddy buddy with the bestie of my crush!’” She waved her fork in the air as she spoke and finally stabbed it into a potato wedge for a bite. 

“This is insane.” you sat there, appetite gone. Jenn never reciprocated feelings towards Mark. Jenn thought Mark liked me?, you thought. It felt like your efforts and feelings from the past few months were tumbling down. You were a step away from a spiral.

“What’s insane is that you thought I liked Mark. Don’t you like him?” 

You suddenly started choking on your spit and Jenn was quick to hand you a glass of water. 

For the rest of the meal, you explained everything to Jenn. From Mark approaching you in class, Haechan coming up with the horrible operation name (to which she gagged), and Jaemin’s talk with you from the other day. She was taken completely by surprise. To be fair, Jenn has always been pretty and has had people of all genders try their hand at flirting with her. She’s always been numb to it, so it’s not surprising that Mark and his loser-like charm didn’t come across as romantic. You use the word ‘loser’ in the nicest way. 

At the end of it all, Jenn is furious.

“I can’t believe he’s ignoring you. And for no reason? After all you did for him? Albeit, it didn’t work, and I hope you never try to set anyone else up with me ever again.” At that, you gave her a guilty smile and offered to buy her boba. 

“Deal. Anyways, that’s fucking ridiculous. What’s his problem?”

“I don’t know,” you said, picking at your fries. “He asked for space so I’m just gonna give it to him.”

Jenn nods and you avoid her pity stares.

“Jenn… I don’t know what I’m gonna do if I lose him, even as a friend. I-I really like him and I’m so so scared. Like the only two ways I can see this going is him continuing to ignore me and we drift or… or I listen to Jaemin and be honest with him about how I feel. And then he decides to stop being friends with me.”

“Okay, the second one is bullshit. You know Mark wouldn’t do that. He’d freak out, yeah, but he wouldn’t cut you off for that.” She scolds you, before taking another bite of your fries.

“I know. I knooow. But it’s still a fear I have. I’m telling you I’d rather be his friend and make a permanent home in this one sided love affair if it means I can still be in his life. That’s how insane my mind is.” You plop your head in your hands and let out what felt like a four-month-long repressed groan. 

“Y/N. You are probably the worst person for yourself.” Jenn clicks her teeth before hand-feeding you a fry, which you sadly munch on.

You sigh, “Yeah…”

“Yeah,” Jenn winces, before pulling you in for a hug.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Mark Lee is spiraling. 

“No because when she looked at me when we were out on that lake, I swear my heart was on steroids. I felt like my whole body was covered in tiny hearts and they were all beating at the same time. It was insane.”

“Uh huh,” Haechan mutters another one word response for what felt like the hundredth time today. He flipped through another page of the magazine before tossing it and reaching for Mark’s Nintendo switch. He shook it in Mark’s face as he paced back and forth.

“Huh? Oh yeah, go for it. Anyways, and when we drove home that day, dude, you should’ve seen the look on her face. I hurt her so bad, but it was like my body was on auto-pilot. I didn’t know what to do with myself. Like my brain and my heart were so confused. Because I like Jenn. I like Jenn, right? But why don’t I get those tiny hearts with her?”

“I don’t know, man. Damn, I can’t catch this stupid spider.” Haechan curses, twiddling his thumb on the remote trying to find joy in Animal Crossing.

“And now I’m not talking to both of them. But it doesn’t feel like I’m avoiding Jenn, but I can feel that I’m avoiding Y/N and it’s killing me.”

“Then. Talk. To. Her.” Haechan enunciates every time he hits a button on the switch.

“Who?” Mark asks, dumbfounded. Mark has had this same exact conversation with Haechan at least twice a day for the past week. If he wasn’t studying, he was bribing Haechan with food to come to his apartment to ramble. 

“Stupid spider,” Haechan slams the game on the couch cushion. “And stupid you. How many times do you have to circle around these same thoughts before you figure it out? Do I really have to say it, Mark? I’m trying to save you the embarrassment of admitting something so obvious.” He leans back, crossing his arms to assert some dominance in this situation. It’s ridiculous how many times Haechan has been tricked by food and games to be trapped in Mark’s apartment for the second time today. 

Mark just blinks, mouth slightly agape.

Haechan tilts his head, poking his cheek with his tongue. He raises his eyebrows, urging him to think just a little harder.

Mark finally looks up, as if a new thought crossed his mind. He gasps softly.

He covers his mouth as he mumbles, “No way…”

Haechan rolls his eyes at his dramatics, “Yes way.”

Mark pokes himself hard in the chest, “Do I like Y/N?”

“And he figures it out!” Haechan sarcastically cheers, clapping his hands. “Now can you buy me some actual food please?”

“No no no. Sit down. Because now we need to discuss this.” Mark starts pulling at his hair, even more stressed out than he was before.

“Oh my GOD,” Haechan screams. “What is there to discuss? You like her! Go tell her!”

Mark’s eyes bugged out as if Haechan turned into a mythical being. “Are you insane? No, scratch that. Am I insane? I started talking to her because I liked her best friend. I asked her to help me get close to her best friend. Our entire relationship is essentially built on this crush and you want me to tell her that I like her? Oh god, she has to hate me. She definitely hates me.” 

Mark stopped pacing and dropped to the ground in a squat. He’s full-on gripping his hair and Haechan is just watching. He forgot that Mark technically doesn’t know she likes him back and he pities him for a second before thinking he’s stupid again for not noticing. Everyone noticed. 

Mark finally raises his head and his face is left with tear trails. Haechan gets up immediately and wraps his arms around Mark’s shoulders.

“Oh, Marky,” Haechan sighs.

“Shit.”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Mark (anatomy): hello!

Mark (anatomy): hi

Mark (anatomy): hey

Mark (anatomy): oh God sorry. I didn’t know which one to send and i accidentally sent them all

Mark (anatomy): HAHAHAH uhhh…

Mark (anatomy): can we talk? I wanna apologize in person.

You couldn’t help but laugh rereading Mark’s texts from this morning as you waited for him at the park. It took you an hour on your own and a 30-minute encouragement session with Jenn to work the confidence to agree to meet him. As nervous as you were to hear what he has to say, you missed him most of all and just wanted to see him. You sat on the second swing on the right, the same one you sat in when the two of you met outside of class the first time.

“Y/N?”

“Oh! Hi,” You got up from the swing to greet him, feeling a bit awkward. You could sense he felt weird too. 

You and Mark are simply classmates. You've been paired up in group projects a couple of times in class and when you see each other on campus, you both timidly wave. But most of the time, you're staring at the back of his head in class, wondering what it’d be like to sit next to him and talk.

So when he asked for your number and texted to meet at the park, your heart felt like it was about to jump out of your chest. Could he see you boring holes into his head or does he look at you the same way?

You wiped your hands on your dress and clasped them in front of you as he stood in his spot, about two feet away.

Why did I wear a dress?, you thought. This is so embarrassing. I look like I’m dressed for a date.

“You look nice,” He says, smiling to break the ice and simultaneously ridding you of your fashion doubts.

“Oh. Thanks,” you force a laugh, also trying to break the ice. “Um, why did you ask me to meet at a park?”

His eyes lit up and he chuckled, “I thought it’d be a good place for some scheming. You know, like in the movies.”

You blinked a few times, not quite catching on. “Scheming?”

He took the swing next to you and sat down. You copied his actions, twisting to look at him. He kicked up to catch some air and swung slightly.

“Okay, this is going to be weird, because I know you barely know me.” Not true, I thought. “But I wanted to ask you a favor. Half of my friends think I’m a dick for this and the other half say that you look understanding, so maybe I should give it a shot. Jaemin was super against it though, so I feel like I’m about to pee my pants right now. I thought about it for like two days and decided, you know what? It wouldn’t hurt to see how you felt, so here I am.” He used his feet as breaks as he finished his ramble to look at you, to seriously look at you.

Your grip on the swings tightens and you can smell the rust smearing on your palms. You can’t believe you get to see your crush this close to your face and he wants to ask you a favor. Your chest feels bubbly with anticipation. You nod, asking him to continue.

“I like Jenn.” The bubbles pop.

“O-oh,” you say. Your mouth has gone completely dry and the wind picked up to blow strands in your face. You quickly brush them away and swallow.

“You… you like my Jenn?” I tightly tuck the strands behind your ears, trying to compose yourself. He giggles and picks up a loose one to help. Mark Lee, what are you doing to me?, you think.

“Yeah. I wanna get closer to her and I know you guys are friends.”

“Best friends,” you clarify, hesitantly.

“Right, right. I know this is insane and I’m like completely using you. So feel free to say no to helping me. You can probably see how desperate I am, but I also can take rejection pretty well! I think.” He tousled his hair with his hand and reoriented himself. 

Clearing his throat, Mark admits, “I’m not… I’m not the best with girls. My game is off completely and I think I really like Jenn. So I thought I’d try. I wanna try. I just don’t know where to start. So I’m sorry if I’m going the wrong way about this or if I offended you.” He huffs. The boy-next-door charm you always see him carry around campus fades and he looks defeated. Despite the slight crack I feel in your heart, it swelled looking into his eyes. He must really like her.

“I’ll help you.”

Mark perked up, his whole body shaking the swingset. “What? Really?” His toothy grin returns and your heart lurches knowing it was partly because of you.

You nod, “Mhm. You seem nice, I think Jenn would like you.” I like you, you thought.

He gets up and tackles you on the swings with a hug. You fall backward and he quickly catches the back of your head before it hits the ground, eyes wide in fear.

“Oh my god, I almost killed you,” he laughs in disbelief. You’re gonna be the death of me, Mark Lee.

“Y/N!”

You almost drop your phone, looking up to meet the eyes of the boy that avoided you for almost two weeks. You thought you'd be overcome with anger, but you weren't. Instead, you felt exactly the same way you felt the first day at the park. Nervous.

“Hey,” you smiled slightly, not getting up from your spot. Mark falters slightly noticing your cold front. He stumbles on the woodchips as he walks over to the swing next to you.

You two swing slightly in silence and you're beating yourself up in your head for not having the courage to curse him out. Jenn prepared you to go off on him and you can’t even open your mouth, you whine to yourself. The more you two sit here, honestly, the angrier you get. Shouldn’t he be saying something? He called you out here in the first place. Before you could utter a word, Mark finally clears his throat. 

“I’m sorry.”

You lift your head to look at him, the first look at him since you took some time apart, and your heart already races when you meet his eyes. You know you're doomed when all the anger suddenly dissipates. You almost want to laugh at how silly this situation is. You still don’t say anything, waiting for him to continue.

“You’re probably confused as to why I’ve been avoiding you. At first, I didn’t know why either. And I know that ignoring you without telling you why wasn’t the move, but it helped me figure it out.” He broke eye contact with you and he started to fiddle with the rings on his fingers. His eyebrows are furrowed and he looks frustrated.

“I did it because I was scared. I was scared because I don’t like Jenn anymore. I’m starting to think I never did.” Mark confesses and he looks upset with himself. You get a good look at his face and you notice the eyebags, the pallor, and his chapped lips. He looks exhausted. You wonder if you look the same.

He sniffles. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I literally put you through all of this just for me to realize I don’t even like her. I used you. And I feel selfish because I still want you in my life.”

“Mark…,” you finally speak, your throat feels rough as if it’s been days. “I have to tell you something.” Your voice came out like a whisper, but it was all the strength you had.

He looks up, a signal to continue.

“As shitty as it was for you to ignore me for over a week, it let me do some thinking too,” you sigh, not wanting to say what comes next. “I don’t think we can be friends right now. And-and don’t worry, it’s not because of the whole 'you befriending me for Jenn' thing. I don’t want you to feel guilty for that because I honestly feel so grateful to have been your friend. I hope, I guess, you feel the same way. But, uh, it’s actually because… it’s because I like you, Mark.”

His jaw drops slightly and his eyes widen, almost like he forgot how to function. It was almost cartoon-like. 

“Yeah,” you awkwardly laugh. “I’ve actually liked you from the start, and I’m not saying that to make you feel guilty. I just thought you should know — to help you understand. Anyways, I realized how hard it is for me to be friends with you when I have these feelings for you. It wouldn’t be fair to me, and I’d be dishonest to you if I continued being friends with you under the guise of purely platonic intentions, you know? I really, really hope you understand.” 

You let out a breath, half relieved and half anxious. After rehearsing that a few times with Jenn, you didn’t expect the words to come out so smoothly. Especially when he’s staring at you like this. However, your pride fades as you wait for his response, a response that determines the future of your relationship.

“I don’t understand,” Mark says firmly. He’s shaking his head trying to wrap his mind around all of it. It feels like a rejection.

“Mark,” you whine, not wanting him to finish his thought -- to spare yourself the awaited pain.

“No, I don’t understand because… because I like you too.”

Heat immediately flushed throughout your chest as you heard the three words you never expected to come out of Mark’s mouth. Your mouth is itching to smile, but a part of you feels doubtful still, weighing down the corners of your lips.

“Are-are you sure? Like are you sure your mind isn’t tricking you into thinking you like me because you realized you don’t like Jenn?” You lean in, close to falling off the swings. You look at him with so much seriousness, but he meets you with a giggle.

“If my mind was tricking me, it’s awfully persistent. I think… in trying to get Jenn to like me, I started to fall for you,” Mark says as if he’s putting the last piece of the puzzle down.

“The image I had of Jenn wasn’t what I expected and I think, while in denial, I was forcing it onto her. I was trying so hard to have real feelings for her, but I think I was also still trying because it meant I got to be with you. Our friendship was contingent on me getting with Jenn, so I guess I was subconsciously scared of losing us… But at the same time, deep down, I wanted more than just a friendship with you.”

Mark looks at you and he offers the widest smile like he found his answer. A smile that ignites the fuzzy fire in your body even more. Your heart is racing so loud you can’t even hear your thoughts.

“Marcus Lee, I didn’t know you had those words in you,” you giggle, trying to soften the conversation.

He shrugs, “Dude, I didn’t think I did either. I just really like you, Y/N. And to be honest, Haechan helped a little.”

As quickly as the happiness came, it washed away just as fast. No matter how ecstatic you were to hear Mark say he likes you back, you couldn’t stop the disgusting doubt that lingered in your mind. You’ve always been in wing woman mode around him, and trying to imagine another scenario where you're the girl he wants is harder than you thought.

“Mark?” you turned to look at him.

“Yeah?” He looks at me with a different light in his eyes.

“I want to believe you, but... I can’t. I can’t really wrap my head around it, I’m sorry.” you clasp your hands together out of nerves.

He dims only a little, “No, I get it." He nods as if gathering the courage to say what's next.

"I can see how it’d be hard to believe. But I’ll prove it to you…

I won’t let you doubt my feelings.”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

A/N: ahhh thanks for reading if you did!!! the only proofreading i did was to change from first person to second person. sorry about the mistakes but thank you for enjoying it if you did <3

[scarletwinterxx]

and you knew what it was, he is in love - doyoung scenario

hiiii ~ i'm a mess right now and i literally cried while writing this for no reason at all😭😅 also, requests are noted just give me some time🥺😊 for now here's a cute doyoung scenario, hope you like it!!!

if you have a request or scenario you want me to do, just send me a message I'll see what I can do😊💌

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

There's this phrase from a book you've read a long time ago that stuck with you, somewhere along the lines "I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once".

That's exactly how you would describe the way you fell in love with him. Little by little, like you were floating away then all at once you realized he's the one.

It's all the little things he did and still does that makes your heart flutter. How attentive he is, he knows when you're in the room shooting you a smile and saving a seat right beside him.

He'd tell you stories and ask you about your day. He asked about all the things you liked hoping he could one day be a part of that list.

He remembers you love your iced coffee in the morning so for you he'd get up early even though he's not a morning person. It doesn't matter though, not when you smile at him so brightly you might as well replace the sun as the center of his universe.

He pays attention to you, even when you don't know it. You always forget to bring a hair tie, so a lot of times you have to brush your hair away from your face sometimes he does it too. An action so simple yet it was enough to leave you a blushing mess.

Then one day just another day of you forgetting to bring your hair tie, but before you could brush your hair back he holds you by the shoulders making you stand in front of him. He gathers all of your hair with one hand and gets the tie with the other, he watched so many video tutorials on how to do this but he's still so nervous afraid that he might hurt you. But then you turned to face him with a confused but amused look on your face.

"Where'd you learn how to do that and where did you get the hair tie?" you asked

"I got it at the convenience store the other day, I got like a bunch of them for you. As for the learning, I'll you some other time"

You blinked at him, there it was again that thumping on your chest you get whenever you're with him. "Thank you" you tell him and he smiles back at you, like knocking the wind out of you.

Then that moment you knew he was someone you'd love for a long time. It's normal for the two of you to spend the day even outside of campus, he's the first person you'd call if you need someone to hang out with.

"Why are we getting ice cream when it's so cold out?" he asks you, but he didn't even stop you from choosing the ice cream on the freezer. Noticing you pick his favorite before getting yours.

"Because I want it" you tell him, walking towards the counter to pay. When all of that is done, the two of you sit outside. The cold breeze hitting your skin making you shiver.

Of course he notices this, but instead of getting the usual nag from him he just shrugs his jacket off catching your attention

"What are you doing?"

Once it's off, he pulls you up and throws the jacket over your shoulders. He pulls your arm that wasn't holding the ice cream through the sleeve before making you do the other one, "You're cold" he answers, gesturing for you to wear it properly while he eats his ice cream. Then he makes you hold his treat, stepping closer to you.

The wind is cold but you can feel your palms getting sweaty from feeling nervous. He closes the jacket, zipping it up enough to make sure you're warm.

"All better?" he asks you

"Do you like me that much that you'd rather be cold so you give me your jacket?" you ask back

"I like you so much, I can't stand the wind whirling by you" he answers back rendering you quiet.

You stayed quiet the whole walk back to your place, he doesn't say anything too. Letting you have time to yourself.

Then you stop walking, turning to face him

"Why do you only say it now?"

"What?"

"That you like me? I thought you didn't see me that way" you mumble, in return you hear a chuckle from him then you feel his finger under your chin making you look up at him.

"I tell you all the time, I give you the first bite of my food always. I watched that movie you wanted even though we've seen it like 10 times before. I have your favorite snack in my bag always, my mom even brought extras for you. Do you think I do that for people I don't like?" Doyoung asks you, caressing your cheeks with the tip of his finger

"That's not telling me, you never said anything" you pout at him, "Do you want me to tell you?"

"No, now I feel like you're only saying it because I asked"

You stepped away from him, acting like you're walking away when he stops you. Holding your hand back making you halt your steps,

"You know, I was scared at first I admit. In my head I went 'Oh no I'm falling in love with my bestfriend' then I see you smile and every time you do I just think 'Oh I'm in love with my bestfriend'"

"I'm your bestfriend?"

"That's all you heard?"

Then you're grinning, smiling so big it might hurt. You jump towards his waiting arms, holding him close. Closer than you ever did. "I confess my feelings to you and you just bestfriend zone me?" Doyoung jokingly mumbles against your cheek

"I love you too, you dummy" you tell him, he puts you down but kept you in his embrace. To you there's no warmer spot than this.

"I just want you to know my feelings are sincere, it took some time to say it but I've been trying. I'm better at showing it to you, I could be better. I'll be better for you"

You shake your head, holding face in your hands, "You are the best there is for me, there's nothing better than this. Keep loving me the way you did, but this time I'll do it with you. I'll take care of you too, like you always do for me"

He smiles at you, taking in your appearance. Memorizing every detail of this moment so he'll never forget. In the silence of his mind he screams, he's in love.

[lustbile]

Something To Prove

JaeminxReader

Word Count: 13.4k

Warnings/Summary: enemies to lovers, smut, mentions of drinking, vaguely dub con, fingering, oral (reader receiving), penetrative, degradation, public. And where Jaemin is kind immature dick, the reader is an emotional masochist, and together they’re both fucking morons, so I hope you enjoy. (Also sorry Jeno I used you for story development)

——————————————————————

Jaemin was a good boy. 

Jaemin was a very good boy. 

That’s why, as he rambled on about something, something blah blah momentum and force nonsense, you wanted to lean over and take a big bite right from his pretty long neck. 

It’s also why you kind of hated him if you thought about it for too long. 

~

~

Jaemin wasn’t someone you’d consider yourself very close with, actually, he wasn’t someone you ever really spoke to until very recently. He was a nice guy, a hard working student, and seemed to get along with everyone that spoke to him, but to you, he was more of just a guy you’d admire from afar. You knew enough about him to know that he just wasn’t someone you’d ever cross paths with if it wasn’t for your shared classes and mutual friends. 

But other than that, you never had any reason to dislike him. Not until your physics professor gave you a reason. 

—

“This is just how it is,” the older man had said, his face showing more age than he had actually lived from how many students he’d had to deal with, “the few homework assignments you do turn in, aren’t good,” he spoke honestly as he flips through the very few copies of your submitted work, “and your grade just keeps dropping by the day. So it’s either you find some initiative to bring up your grade, or I’m going to request you drop my class.”

“But it’s already past the drop period,” you argued, worry blooming across the features of your face, “if I drop it now, I fail immediately.”

“I mean this in the nicest way I can possibly say it,” he said with an exhausted sigh, “but that’s not really my problem. I do as much as I can as your professor, but I can’t force you to do your work.”

When he said this you wanted to cry. Well, no, you wanted to offer to suck his dick for a higher grade if you’re being totally honest with yourself, but the lovely picture that he kept on his desk of him, his wife, and baby daughter was enough to plague you with guilt for even considering that. 

“Well, then I can bring up my grade instead, right?” You asked hopefully, the look of skepticism that flashed on his face making you shrink, “that’s what you said,” you reminded, your hands moving rapidly in front of you as you tried to encourage him and yourself, “bring up my grade or drop the class. Bringing up my grade is an option.”

“The science department has a student-ran study center,” he told you with a sigh, standing from his desk to politely tell you the conversation was coming to an end, “they even have student tutors that can help you if you’re that determined to make this work.”

“Thank you, professor,” you spoke genuinely, moving to his office door with a weak smile on your face, “I swear I’ll figure this out.”

“Study center is just down the hall,” he informed you, “but,” he continued, stopping you in your tracks as you already had a foot out his door, “only go there if you’re serious about this. They’re students too, so you don’t need to be wasting their time.”

—

His words still sting even now as you sit next to Jaemin, your pen bouncing against the library table in impatience. It stung, but now as you sit zoned out staring at the way Jaemin’s Adam’s apple bounces as he speaks, you can kind of understand where he was coming from. 

You weren’t a horrible student, you just struggled to focus on classes that don’t actually interest you, and physics does not interest you in the slightest. Jaemin on the other hand, was a phenomenal student. There didn’t seem to be any subject he had any real issue with, but physics was his bread and butter. That’s why the sweet girl who assigned tutors sent you to him, but it’s also why you kind of wanted to rip his head off his nice, wide shoulders. 

You wouldn’t call Jaemin a nerd, not to his face at least, but he genuinely wasn’t what you’d think of when you pictured a text-book “nerd.” He didn’t struggle in social situations, he didn’t seem weird or creepy, and he was admittedly drop-dead gorgeous. He just really seemed to really love math and science, which would be a huge help to you, if you could just stop staring at his throat like a hungry animal. 

“And when you consider the angle in which…” he says as he turns to look at you, the dazed look being very evident on your face and making him trail off before he sternly says your name, “are you even listening to me right now?”

You jump at his sudden acknowledgment, the annoyed look on his face reminding you of the main issue you had with him. 

Jaemin kind of hated you. 

You would understand if he hated you for not paying attention, you could see how frustrating that would be, but he seemed to hate you before he even started tutoring you. The day you met, he was immediately distant and cold towards you, and you had seen plenty of instances of him being a very friendly guy. So, you were very confused, and you even tried to switch your tutor to avoid the tension and preserve the image of him you liked to fantasize about, but unfortunately, Jaemin was all they had. So the deeper you got into tutoring sessions with him, and the more you saw just how blatantly he did not like your presence, that’s where you started to zone out, choosing to at least appreciate the eye candy if you weren’t going to get anything academic out of the relationship. 

“Yeah totally,” you lie, leaning closer to look at the textbook as you clear your throat, “just trying to keep up.”

You laugh weakly as he keeps staring at you, his dark eyes and the way his thick eyebrows lower making you feel like he can read your mind. You shift uncomfortably under his glare, and when he simply rolls his eyes, you feel your own spark of annoyance bubble up in your chest. 

“How about we call it a day then, hm?” He offers, flashing a fake smile in your direction before he loudly slams the book in front of him closed, “you very clearly have more important things to worry about.”

“You know what, Jaemin,” you sigh, matching his sarcastically sweet tone, “I actually do.” 

You both immediately turn to your respective things, packing your bags and moving to leave the small private study room. He stands quickly before you, turning to look down at you as irritation radiates off his body. 

“Well, whatever it is,” he starts, putting his hands together in front of his chest to speak to you like a kindergarten teacher, “I can only assume it must be incredibly important considering you’re putting it above the class you’re miserably failing.”

“I’ll have you know,” you argue, making him stop in his walk towards the door, “my grade has gone up more than a few points these past few weeks,” you speak honestly this time, an amused laugh coming out as a huff from your nose, “which I can admit, is partially due to your help, but also because some of us, actually know how to balance school work and having a fucking life.”

“And what exactly was that supposed to suggest?” He asks, turning back to you with an offended twist in his features. 

“Oh come on,” you huff again, getting up and walking to stand next to him at the door, “you know exactly what I was suggesting.”

“Actually I don’t,” he shrugs, crossing his arms and tilting his head, “so why don’t you enlighten me?”

“You. Have. No. Life,” you speak slowly and childishly, smiling when you can tell your words bother him. 

“I have a life,” he scoffs, getting annoyed in a way that is a lot more enjoyable to you then it should be, “you have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Oh I don’t?” You start, looking up at the ceiling as if you’re deep in thought, “I have never seen you without your head buried in a book, and of all the parties I’ve been to, I’ve never seen you once,” your hand flitters in the air as you speak, and you continue, speaking over him as he tries to defend himself, “which arguably, could just mean we don’t go to the same parties, right? But that’s not the case, at least not according to Jeno.”

The mention of his friend’s name makes him stiffen, his lips curling in between his teeth as he shakes his head, “just because I don’t go to parties doesn’t mean I don’t have a life.”

“You’re right, it doesn’t,” you agree, nodding your head, “but the fact that the only place you go to aside from your dorm and your classes is the library…” you trail off, clicking your tongue in faux disappointment, before you turn to open the door. 

“Also,” you start to add as you step out of the room, “you might want to have a talk to Jeno about keeping some things to himself,” you nod gently, “I swear that boy is just an open book when you find the right questions to ask.”

——

Jaemin clearly doesn’t take your advice about talking to Jeno, or at least Jeno just didn’t care if he did. Because not even a full hour later, he was sending you a text to tell you how annoyed Jaemin was when he got back to their shared dorm. 

I’m surprised there wasn’t steam coming out of his ears, Jeno’s message read, the multiple laughing emojis he put on the end telling you he was probably rolling in unsympathetic laughter after Jaemin gave him a rundown of what happened. 

You didn’t want to enjoy the relayed information as much as you did, but there was just something about getting the last laugh with Jaemin that gave you a rush. So you grinned stupidly at your phone, the idea that you could plague Jaemin’s mind without having to be physically present making the device shake in your hand. 

The shaking stops when another text from Jeno pops up on your screen. 

Anyways, the message starts, now that you’re free of Jaemin’s wrath you should come out to the bar with us tonight. 

You don’t know exactly who the “us” in his message entails, Jeno’s list of friends being long and always interchangeable, but you agree regardless. The need to get wasted to celebrate getting on Jaemin’s nerves almost overwhelming. 

——

The bar is loud but familiar as you stumble in. Bodies of already drunk college students dance and writhe in front of you, and you reach to tug at the hem of your dress as your eyes dart around in search of a familiar face. 

The fading pink of Haechan’s hair is the first thing you see, and you let out a sigh of relief that gets lost amongst the heavy bass that shakes the floor. You start to stumble towards the beacon that is the boy’s head, and when you see Jeno sat next to him animatedly telling a story, you feel a soft smile pull at your lips. 

Your smile doesn’t prevail for long, as when you get within a few feet of the table they have claimed, you see that the person who sits on Jeno’s other side is none other than the boy who put the fire in your chest that you anticipated in smothering out with alcohol. 

You stop in shock for a moment, the sight of Jaemin sitting in the bar unfamiliar and admittedly, a bit weird. He doesn’t look extremely out of place, for one he doesn’t have his face within inches of an academic article, but you can see the tension that pushes at his shoulders. 

His hand is wrapped around a mostly filled drink, his lips strained slightly red to tell you that he’s taken at least a few sips, and he leans in with a furrow in his brow as he tries to hear Jeno’s voice over the music. 

You aren’t really aware of how blatantly you’re staring at him, analyzing the way he moves and interacts like he’s a wild animal outside of his usual environment, until his eyes flicker quickly towards you. He has to double take, not registering who you are at first glance, but when he returns your stare, you can tell he feels shy under your intense eyes. 

You can tell he clears his throat from the way his throat shifts, his head dropping slightly as he nudges a still rambling Jeno. Your legs seem to remember their function in that moment as you start approaching them again, a degree more hesitantly now, and you’re almost directly behind Jeno when he finally turns around. 

“Hey,” Jeno drawls, speaking your name as a smile fills his face, “I was wondering when the fuck you’d get here.” 

You can tell he’s already a few drinks in from the way the skin of his face flushes and how he wraps his arms loosely around the back of his chair. Without thinking, you reach to brush the few strands of hair that’s fallen in front of his eyes, and return his smile with a small laugh. 

“Well, I’m here,” you say, leaning back to playfully motion your hands up and down your body, “you can hold your applause.”

Your words earn a laugh from Haechan as he reaches to pinch at your elbow, but Jeno only scoffs. You almost forget Jaemin is even there as he sits there silently, but when Jeno turns towards him as quickly as his intoxicated brain will allow him, the boy straightens at the sudden acknowledgment. 

“We saved you a seat next to Jaem,” he nods, leaning his head back to wink at you not as discreetly as he had probably intended, “if you think you can hold back from ripping his head off for the night.”

“I’ll be on my best behavior,” you hollowly promise, leaning down to kiss his heated forehead before you step towards the empty seat, “for now at least.”

Jaemin shifts uncomfortably in his seat as you sit down, and you hold back the urge to roll your eyes. Instead you scoot your chair closer and lean towards him as Jeno starts to clue you in to the story he had already gotten halfway through. 

——

You, Haechan, and Jeno bounce the conversation around the three of you as the night goes on, Jaemin only adding grunts and nods of acknowledgment where he sought fit. He looks more comfortable than when you first arrived, and you can only imagine it’s due to his drink now being mostly finished at this point, but he seems to refuse to let his eyes linger on you for more than a few brief seconds every now and again. 

“So, Jeno,” Haechan starts, taking a long swig of his beer as a teasing slur weaves through his words, “how’d you get our little bookworm out of the library for once?”

He leans over Jeno to pinch roughly at Jaemin’s thigh as he speaks, the boy next to you jumping and shooting him a scowl in response. His fingers tap in annoyance against the table in front of him, and as the beer you stole from Jeno slinks through your veins, you can’t stop yourself as your eyes zero in on the movement. 

“He asked to come,” Jeno admits playfully, proudly slapping Jaemin on the back and forcing a sarcastic smile to spread over his face, “I guess he finally decided we were good enough to get a drink with.”

“He needed it,” you interject before you can even stop the words from coming from your mouth, and as Jaemin’s blank stare flicks over to you for longer than a few seconds, you stumble to explain, “I mean,” you say with a huff, laying a hesitant hand on his bicep, “you should see how tense this one gets when were in that study room.”

“Probably because he’s bricked up from being locked in a room with you,” Jeno laughs, leaning forward to shoot you what you think is his attempt at another wink, “I know I’d be.”

“That’s because you’re disgusting,” you argue, rolling your eyes, “Jaemin’s a good boy, isn’t that right?”

You glance at him with a smile, just trying to include him in the conversation that centers around himself, but when his arm tenses under your touch, you slip your hand away from him quickly. 

“Yeah, our perfect little guy,” Haechan coos, reaching behind Jeno now to tug at Jaemin’s ear. 

Jaemin jerks away from his touch quickly, grumbling under his breath and making you tense as his knee accidentally pushes between yours briefly. He doesn’t seem to notice the action or the way you respond, as he just straightens back up when Haechan pulls away and rolls his shoulders back. 

“I’m tense because the person I tutor,” Jaemin finally interjects, his eyes darting back to you, “doesn’t seem to actually care about anything I’m telling them,” he continues, turning back to his friends, and you can’t help but feel like he’s tattling on you. 

“He speaks!” Jeno almost yells, ignoring Jaemin’s admission that you’re a horrible student, “but admit it,” he says, his voice calmer as his arm falls across the back of Jaemin’s chair, “you have a hard time paying attention too with someone that hot sitting so close to you, don’t you?”

“Jeno,” you interrupt as he tries to wink again, trying to spare yourself and Jaemin from his question, “have I ever told you how much of a gentleman you are?”

“Actually, no you haven’t,” he responds, the shock in his voice being so genuine that it throws you a bit. 

“Good,” you nod, “because it would be a lie if I did.”

You want to enjoy the way Jeno starts to petulantly writhe in his seat, his head falling back as he whines about how mean you are, but you suddenly feel the weight of eyes on you. You hesitantly flick your eyes towards Jaemin, and you see him staring blankly at you in your peripherals. You know he sees the cautious glance you offer him before you look back towards where Haechan is laughing at Jeno’s display, but he shows no interest in looking away, instead he just sinks back in his seat as you start to squirm. 

You cross your legs as he seems lost in trailing his eyes over you shamelessly, your eyes darting back to him a few times as you try to focus on the new conversation Haechan and Jeno had started, but he seems unmoving aside from his eyebrows knitting together like he’s trying to figure something out. You want to ask him what’s up, the question bubbling rudely at the back of your throat, but his face just continues to screw up as if he’s angry and it kills any syllable that tries to form on your tongue. 

You jump slightly at the first touch of his hand on your knee, his fingers swirling curiously against your skin as if it was a normal action for him. But you could count on one hand the times Jaemin has made any physical contact with you, and considering how most of them were completely unintentional, having him move towards you with so much purpose made you twitch. 

You glance down at where his fingers prod at your skin, the same fingers you’ve unfortunately found yourself staring at as he wrote notes down in your textbook during your tutoring session, before you finally look up towards him. 

His head is tilted down, watching the small invisible patterns he creates on your leg with the same deep, angry look on his face. You can’t even begin to imagine what he’s thinking, but when he looks up to make eye contact with you, it feels like he can see every thought you’ve ever had. 

You feel sucked into a bubble with him as Jeno and Haechan are too busy talking over one another to notice the newly formed tension. It feels like you’ve started a staring contest with one another, the unspoken rule that you can’t look away being agreed upon quickly, but you can’t help but wonder what would happen if you did. 

You see a small twitch at the corner of his lip when you harshly swallow, a movement so minuscule that you’re shocked you notice it, but you feel your head jerk back slightly in response. You feel like he’s challenging you to something, to make a move or say something to clue in your other friends into what he’s doing, but you just sit there, waiting. 

At the exact moment you bring your bottom lip between your teeth, he moves. His hand slides up further, cupping your knee with his entire palm, as his fingers brush against your thigh in a way that would be comforting if it wasn’t for how confused you were. 

You notice quickly how much you like the feeling of his hand, the realization flooding through your chest so quickly, you pray it doesn’t show on your face. His fingers are slightly calloused, gentle but firm as they dimple your skin, and his touch makes goosebumps raise on your skin, and from the way his eyebrow darts up quickly towards his hairline, you know he feels it. 

A sharp intake of air goes through your nose when he slides up your thigh, his hand getting more confident as he starts to roughly grope at your flesh, but his face stays as blank as ever. Your facade drops as you finally toss him a look of confusion, but he just continues to knead your tensing muscle until you feel his fingertips start to push under the hem of your dress. 

You stand too quickly on wobbling legs as a hiccup of shock bubbles from your lips, and you have to place your hand on the table to steady yourself as his hand falls away. Jeno and Haechan’s conversation dies as they turn to look at you in shocked concern, but all you can focus on is the way Jaemin’s head tilts back, his face finally pulling into a look of sleazy pride as he watches you in amusement. 

“I um,” you try to speak, your voice coming out cracked and quiet before you clear your throat, “I’m gonna go get a new drink,” you nod, a weak smile pulling on your lips, “your taste in beer is shit, Jeno.”

He groans immediately at your words, the concern slipping from his face and getting replaced by playful annoyance, “no one told you to steal my drink you big baby,” he grunts, reaching for the abandoned bottle only to be disappointed to learn that you finished it off. 

You roll your eyes as he stares at the empty bottle longingly, his ability to sulk over anything being admirable to some extent, but you’re glad that he’s now distracted by the label as he doesn’t see the way Jaemin’s hand sticks out to brush against the inside of your thigh as you step away. 

You walk quickly away from the table, your arms lifting to cross over your chest as your thoughts swirl in your brain rapidly. You don’t look back towards the table as you push towards the bar, but you can feel the way Jaemin’s eyes follow your every move regardless. 

—

You have a new drink in hand when you feel a presence next to you, a broad chest pushing into your shoulder as you slide your finger around the rim of your glass. You stayed at the bar, taking a few sips of your drink, in hopes to collect your thoughts about what had just happened between you and the boy that had never shown any other feelings but hatred and indifference towards you since you met him. And you felt like you had formed some coherent opinions on the situation, until he pressed against your side and made every thought fly from your mind at once. 

You turn your head hesitantly towards him as he leans his side against the bar, the soft smile he wears making you even more confused as he nods. You try to smile back, but it doesn’t reach your eyes in a way that you know would be more convincing, so you just look back towards your drink with a huff. 

“I told the guys I was coming to make sure you were okay,” he admits, his voice rumbling his chest and shooting vibrations against your shoulder, “also that I wanted another drink.”

“Do you?” You ask, the question honest as you’re shocked to think he would ever finish the first one. 

“I guess,” he shrugs, leaning to get the bartender’s attention, before he looks back to you, “I’m here so I might as well.”

“Why are you here?” You ask bluntly, your eyebrows furrowing in curiosity as you look at him again, his stare just as intense as it was at the table as you make eye contact. 

“It’s a public place,” he grins, reaching to tug at your ear. 

“Why did you really come?” You ask, pulling away from his touch as annoyance builds in your chest, how casually he’s treating you suddenly making you suspicious. 

He hesitates for a moment, his face twitching as if he’s debating whether or not to tell you the truth, before he smiles again. 

“Jeno told me you were coming,” he nods, pushing his tongue against his cheek as he hums. You don’t respond, instead you just stare at him in confusion as you wait for him to elaborate, “and you think I don’t have a life,” he continues, making you tense, “so… here I am. Having a life.”

“Jaemin,” you start, speaking genuinely for once as it starts to feel like everything that conspired between you earlier happened in an alternate dimension, “you’re a good guy,” you try to reassure, feeling a small inkling of guilt about your earlier words, “you don’t have to be Mr. party animal just because you’re in college.”

“No,” he agrees, with a sigh, “but you clearly seem to think I’m some boring goody two shoes.”

“Jaemin, why do you care what I think?” You ask as you take a sip of your drink, “we’re not even friends.”

You see a flash of something on his face when you say this, but he covers it quickly and just leaves you more confused, “what if I showed you that I’m not some loser who just sits in the library all day?” He asks as he steps closer to you, lowering his voice as he locks his eyes onto yours, “I can prove to you that I can cause as much trouble as Jeno.”

“You don’t have to prove anything to me,” you argue, the mention of your mutual friend making you shake your head as you try to think of a correlation, “when has my opinion ever mattered to you?”

“I’d give the exact date if I could,” he mutters as he reaches to grab your wrist, and before you can even question what he could possibly mean by what he said, he’s pulling you from the bar. 

Your drink clatters from your hand as you stumble on your feet, and in a panic, you try to reach to catch it, but as he tugs you through the mass of people trying to squeeze into the now empty spot you leave, you abandon the glass as you try to keep up with his long strides. He steps so quickly and with so much purpose you trip over your feet and earn a few elbows in your sides, but as he leads you to a familiar door, you can’t help but focus on wondering where this is going. 

“Why are you taking me to the bathroom?” You ask without thinking, speaking loudly over the music and causing strangers to turn to you two in confusion. He ignores your words though, and before you can try to interrogate him further, he’s pushing open the door and pulling you in. 

You gasp as you stumble into the room, surprised at the rough way he handles you as well as the fact that no one’s inside. You’ve been in this bathroom enough times in your college career to know that it usually has at least one or two drunk girls in it, either crying in a stall or fixing their makeup, but as Jaemin turns to lay his back against the door, you realize quickly it’s just you two alone. 

“Now can you tell me why we’re in the bathroom?” You sigh, laughing gently to cover the nerves that bloom in your chest as your eyes trail over the obscene amount of graffiti that covers the walls. 

Your laughter trails off awkwardly as he just continues staring at you, and you come to realize you somehow prefer when Jaemin is mean to you rather than when he’s silent. You didn’t love the fact that Jaemin hated you, but you had at least come to find it amusing; him staring silently just made you feel anxious and small. 

You feel like weak prey as he starts stepping over to you, his steps slow and calculated as he eyes your entire body. You want to ask something else, to fill the quiet of the bathroom with something other than just the muffled music and voices that slip under the door, but your voice dies in your throat as he gnaws on the inside of his cheek in thought. 

Your arms cross over your ribs as you hug yourself anxiously, shrinking slightly when he stands in front of you. You try to hold eye contact with him, trying to read whatever thoughts he has swimming in his head, but the intensity he holds in his glare licks at your skin until you're forced to turn your eyes towards the floor. 

You tense when you feel his fingers brush against your jaw, a reminder of how they felt gripping your thigh flooding into your mind and making you pull in a deep breath. You stay frozen in your spot as his hands trail across your skin, his thumbs pushing gently into your cheeks, before his palms lay against the sides of your neck. He squeezes at your skin, forcing your head back up slowly until all you can see is his blank expression, the lack of emotion he shows making your lips part slightly. 

You stumble back slightly as he pushes himself into you, and it takes a few seconds for your brain to register that his lips are pressed tightly against yours. He kisses you roughly, your teeth clacking together and rattling your skull, and you reach quickly towards his chest in an attempt to steady yourself. 

You grunt in confusion against his mouth, your eyes fluttering as the voices in your head debate on whether or not to kiss him back. The last remaining sliver of rationality in your mind screams at you, begging for answers and to understand the way he’s acting, and with a sharp breath, you finally gain the strength to push your bodies apart. 

His hands remain on you as you stare at him wildly, your mouth opening and closing as you try to find your voice, but the way his tongue darts out to lick your lipgloss off his lips makes your thoughts stutter. Your fingers dig into and curl around the fabric of his shirt, a need to pull him back to you making your arms twitch, but before you can make the move, you blurt out the first words that come to your mind. 

“What the fuck is up with you tonight?” You ask, your voice exasperated and winded. You stare at him, your eyes darting around his face as you silently beg him for answers, but when he just smiles in response, anger bubbles in your chest. 

Every emotion you’ve ever felt for the boy that clings to you floods your system; your annoyance when he makes mean comments, your amusement when you get on his nerves, and even the weird underlying arousal you’ve felt towards him whenever you paid too much attention to how handsome he was. But all of it was just always met with his clear indifference towards you, so why was he doing these things to you so suddenly? Accusing him of not having a life wasn’t even close to the rudest thing you’ve ever said to him, so why was that his tipping point? And why was groping your thigh and kissing you in a dirty bar bathroom his response?

“Does it bother you?” He whispers, his voice becoming rougher and making your hands twist tighter into his shirt, “I thought you liked making me mad?”

You want to respond, to ask him something that will give you clarification of where his head was at, but he doesn’t give you the chance to formulate a coherent sentence before his lips are pressing against yours again. 

You don’t push him away this time, your resolve breaking as he licks at your mouth. You lean into him instead, your mouth falling open as he starts to walk you backwards, and you tuck the question of what was it that I said to make him act like this into your pocket for another day. 

You feel breathless as his tongue dips into your mouth, his hands pushing tightly into your skin so you can’t pull away even if you wanted. You jerk slightly when your back bumps into the wall of one of the stalls, smacking your shoulder painfully into the edge as he blindly guides you to step into the small space. You hear the high pitched creaking of the stall door as he reaches one hand to pull it behind him, and as he pushes you to lean against the cool metal wall, you hear him slide the rusted lock into place. 

When his hand returns to your body, he pushes it against the curve of your back, pulling you closer to him as he grunts into your mouth. You pant when he finally detaches his lips from yours, your lungs begging for oxygen as he tilts your head back and licks at your jaw. His teeth scrape against your skin harshly, and as he pushes his leg to rest between yours, you let out a grumbling plea of his name. 

He bites roughly at your neck, stopping only to suck at patches of flesh until it stings. You feel your hips start to tilt towards his thigh, searching for friction as he abuses the skin that protects your drying throat, and when he smooths both his hands down your body until they rest on your ass, he digs his fingers into your skin to hold you still. 

You mumble pathetically, moving your hands to wrap around his shoulders as you try to shift your body in his hold, but all he does is smile against your skin as he drops his head to lick between your collarbones. 

“You think you deserve anything?’ He asks with an amused scoff, kneading at your ass until your dress starts to lift, “I’m doing this because I want to, not because you’re asking.”

His nails dig into your skin as he speaks, his head lifting again to lick at the shell of your ear as he pulls your thighs further apart. Your underwear shifts tighter against your body as he moves you as he pleases, the fabric sticking to your skin and making you gasp as you realize how wet you’ve gotten, and it feels like you might start falling apart if he doesn’t do something more. 

“Jaemin, you’re a good boy,” he grunts in your ear, mocking your voice and words from earlier as he moves to tug your underwear upward, “and good boys don’t do stuff like this right?”

You whimper quietly, the fear that he’ll stop making your hips squirm against his hold. You would take back what you said if you could, if it meant him giving you what you need now, but you can’t help but wonder if he’d even think to do this if you hadn’t said it in the first place. 

“How wet are you?’ He asks crudely, pressing his nose into your temple as he bites down on your cheek, “how badly have you ruined your pretty little panties for some boring little bookworm?”

Your head bumps dully against the wall behind you as you tilt it back in frustration, a small huff slips from your nose as your body heats up in embarrassment. You don’t want to answer him, the way he throws your beliefs back into your face making you feel stupid for ever thinking it, but you would never said any of it if you knew what he could do to your body. 

You jolt when his hand swats at the skin of your ass, the way he holds his palm and fingers flat making the sting bad enough that you let out a small squeak, and when his fingers immediately move to scratch at the tender skin, a sob deflates your chest. 

“No wonder you’re such a bad student,” he clicks his tongue, “you can’t even answer when someone asks you a simple question. Guess I’ll have to find out for myself.”

He keeps his nails sunk into your skin as he drags his hand to the front of your thigh, leaving angry scratches in his path. You feel the painful throbbing between your thighs, and when his traces over the seam of your underwear, you grit your teeth and whine. 

The way he continues to bite at your skin feels like a punishment, his teeth scraping at your face and jaw making stabs of pain spread throughout your nerves, but it doesn’t hold a candle to the dull ache you feel in your core. You need something, but how his fingers feel tickling at the inside of your thigh stops you from voicing any demands. 

He lets out a rumbling groan when he presses his middle finger against the damp spot that’s formed at the seat of your underwear, the sound deep and loud around you and making your heart flutter in your chest. And when he starts to circle it and pushes until he shoves the fabric shallowly inside you, your thighs tense and clamp around his hand. 

“You’re ruined,” he confirms, sounding proud and cocky over how your arousal seeps through and sticks to his finger, “it’s dripping down your thighs.”

You mumble in shame at his words, the way he chuckles softly making you let out a soft hum of his name. One of your shaking hands falls from his shoulder, wrapping around his wrist as you suddenly want to pull him away, but you feel his forearm flex immediately, keeping his hand where he wants as you fall apart. 

He grabs roughly at the crotch of your underwear, twisting and pulling up on the thin fabric until it digs into your sensitive clit. It’s a weird feeling, not enough movement or friction to give you any relief, but from the sounds that roll from the back of his throat, he must be more than pleased from how the sensation makes your face twist. 

He forces the fabric in place for another moment or two, tugging on it just enough to make your breathing pick up as your knees buckle, before he finally pushes it out of the way. You cringe when his fingers finally slip against you, the sticky sounds that attack your eardrums as he smears your arousal around making you much too aware of what you already knew. 

“So good,” he praises, prodding at your entrance as he drops his forehead onto your shoulder, “so fucking slutty and perfect.”

You both sign when he sinks his fingers inside you, two of his long digits stretching you open as he curls them gently. He pushes slowly, taking his time to feel the way you wrap around him, and when you clench softly he lets out a hiss of approval. 

He shifts slightly, straightening up and pulling the hand that was still pressed against your back until it rests around your throat. His fingers drum against the side of your neck, testing the waters for a moment, and when they finally push against your veins, your eyes fly open again in shock. 

He pushes you tightly against the wall, keeping you in place as he stares into your eyes, and when he can see them glass over from how dizzy you’ve become, he starts to drag his fingers out of you. 

He seems fascinated by how your face reacts to the friction, even the smallest twitch in your features making him tilt his head and grumble under his breath. But when he shoves his fingers back in too quickly for you to handle, he smiles at the way your mouth falls open. 

He starts fucking you quickly with his fingers, the pace rough and overwhelming and makes your legs shake. You twist your hand that still wraps around his wrist as you try to get him to slow down, but he’s too strong for your weakening muscles, and he pushes easily past your tightening grip. 

“Take it,” he commands, spitting the words quietly into your face as shakes your neck slightly, “you’re gonna fucking take it.”

You cry out as he parts his fingers inside you, the sound coming out broken and strained as your hips start rocking sloppily. Your nails dig into his wrist, your eyes starting to roll back, and all you can do is give him control of your body as you start to melt in his hold. 

You can’t control the volume of the noises that break mindlessly from your throat, the wet sounds that come from between your legs being the only thing to combat how your moans bounce around the metal walls. You want to calm down, to find your bearings and keep some decorum, but when he tilts his wrist to push the heel of his hand into your neglected clit, the last remaining bits of sanity and awareness slip from your body. 

The pleasure comes on too fast, the tightening knot in your belly forming too quickly and making your vision blur. You can barely make out the details of his determined face, but the vulgar words that spill out in a jumble off his tongue is enough to let you know much he dreamed of seeing you like this. 

You bounce in his palm, the lack of control he has on your hips making you move wildly and without rhythm. You can feel now the arousal he claimed was dripping down your legs, but your mind is too far gone to be ashamed of it anymore. 

“You’re such a mess,” he sighs, keeping his fingers steady and quick no matter how much you squirm against him, “you’re gonna come so hard it drips down my arm aren’t you?”

You pant and moan without thought, agreeing with him with mindless hums as you try to nod against his fist, and as if waiting for your acknowledgment, you feel the promise of your orgasm start scratching down your spine. 

Your breath comes out in short, sharp huffs as your stomach starts to flex tightly, the way your toes curl into your shoes making the arches of your feet ache. You try to hold off, to control the way you react as the reality of where he has you weighs on your shoulders, but as he pushes the tips of his fingers into the spot that makes your blood rush loudly in your ears, you feel pleasure crashing down on you all at once. 

Your sounds are muffled as he leans forward to press his mouth against yours, his tongue licking past your teeth until he can brush it against yours crudely. He kisses you messily, eating the moans you let out as if he needs them to survive, and as your back arches away from the wall, you feel your combined saliva drip down your chin. 

He keeps his hand moving against you, fucking you roughly through your orgasm as he rolls against your sensitive clit. You finally let go of his wrist, the overstimulation of your nerves becoming too much, and you move until both your hands are clinging to his shoulders in the need to keep him close. 

He slows down when he hears the begging whimpers you let out against his lips, his fingers pushing gently until they slip out and start to pet at your heated skin. He continues toying with you, coating you in the evidence of your orgasm, and he smiles when you let out a hiccup every time he brushes your buzzing clit. 

You're still swimming in the afterglow of his body against yours, clinging to him desperately as the fear of what will happen after his lips slip away from yours tries to clear the fog that wraps around your mind, when the bathroom door creaks open. You barely hear it, not registering what it means as his fingers still tap against your neck, and you're too lost in the taste of his lips to hear the heavy footsteps approaching the stall. 

The loud banging that rattles the door makes you both jump, Jaemin having the awareness to pull away from the kiss, but not enough to stop sliding his fingers against you. You try to slam your thighs together, trying to push him out and away, but he looks too unbothered by the interruption for your liking. 

“Come on kids,” a deep, unfamiliar voice speaks from the other side of the door, “this isn’t a classy establishment, but you still can’t do that shit here.”

If you could crawl into a hole and die at that moment, you would, but instead you just curl into Jaemin’s chest in shame. He finally pulls his hands away, releasing your throat to hold gently at the back of your head, and you grumble in annoyance when you feel laughter shake his chest. 

You move towards the door when you hear the stranger step away, your skin heated and your hands falling to push at the hem of your dress as the need to run away from the room overwhelms your senses. Your limbs feel too heavy, and your weak legs make you stumble, but you scramble to be presentable enough to face the room full of strangers. 

“Hey, wait,” Jaemin stops you, his hand moving to grab your arm and you cringe at the feeling of your arousal that still sticks to his skin. You tense as he pulls you back, your anxiety rising at the idea of talking about what just happened, but you huff in annoyance when he just slams you back into his chest. 

“What are yo-“ you try to ask, pushing against his arms as you try to squirm away, but he wraps an arm around you tightly as he slinks to squat behind you. You say his name, your voice scandalized as you feel him pushing your dress back up your hips, “we have to go.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he blows you off, using his free hand to drag your underwear down your thighs. He taps carelessly at the back of your knees when the fabric pools around your feet, and you jerk in shock enough for him to slip the still damp article of clothing from under you. 

He stands quickly, letting you go and allowing you to whip around with an angry furrow in your brow. You move to fix your dress again in confusion, and when he twirls your underwear around his fingers and offers you a sleazy grin, your hands twitch in the need to hit him. 

“Call it a memento,” he shrugs, holding your underwear out as if to appraise them, before he shoves them in his pocket, “my own little souvenir.”

—

You stumbled out of the bathroom quickly, an annoyed grimace on your face and a grinning Jaemin hot on your heels. You returned to the table, feeling incredibly exposed from the lack of underwear beneath your dress, but grateful as Haechan and Jeno seemed too drunk to notice how long you were both gone and the fact that neither of you returned with drinks. 

You didn’t talk anymore to Jaemin, even though you left the bathroom with way more questions than when you entered, and you continued not talking to him for the next few days. You texted Jeno, asking him to tell Jaemin that you would have to skip your tutoring sessions for a while, and you made sure to dart out of the room before him anytime you were in the same class as him. 

You weren’t sure why you were avoiding him, maybe the shame of what you two did was just too much for you to look him in the eyes, but that didn’t stop you from itching for an answer. You found yourself staring at him in class, drilling holes into the side of his face as he listened to the lecture in oblivion, as if you’d find some kind of answer lingering on his form. 

It was about a week later when your curiosity became too much, and the way you were constantly using Jeno to cancel your tutoring sessions felt too childish. He had sent you a text, asking you if he needed to relay anything to Jaemin, and you felt almost crushed at the fact that he was anticipating you being a big baby. Not that he knew why you were canceling, you hadn’t told him what happened and you assumed Jaemin didn’t either, but it all made you feel a little foolish. 

Which is how you ended up back in the library, staring blankly at the door of the private study room as if there was a carnivorous animal behind it, rather than just Jaemin. 

You cringe as the door creaks open, your hand so tight around the handle that it makes your fingers ache, and when you peek around the edge of the door, you see him sitting there studying quietly. 

He turns quickly, his face flush as he squeezes his pencil in his hand. All the confidence and slyness he held in his features the other night is gone, and is replaced by a soft nervousness instead. 

You watch each other intently, neither of you speaking as you see his shoulders tensing as you step into the room. You feel how clammy your palm has gotten after you pull your hand away from the door handle, and you clench your fingers together to relieve some of the stiffness. 

“Hey…” he speaks slowly, testing the waters and visibly relaxing just a bit when you smile softly at him. 

You notice almost immediately how he’s pushed his chair as far to the end of the table as he could, your heart sinking slightly when you see the chair left empty for you has faced the same fate at the other end. You respond just as quietly as you pull out your seat, and you can hear him tapping his pencil on the table when you move it closer to him. 

“Am I allowed to get closer to you?” You ask, trying to break the tension with a nervous laugh, “or are you gonna jump on me for skipping out on tutoring?”

You see his eyes widen at your words, his mouth falling open and closing a few times before he lets out a breath, “yeah I just didn’t know…” he stumbles, “I didn’t mind you skipping.”

“It probably just confirmed you thinking I’m a shitty student, right?” You tease, moving to hit him playfully for a moment, before you reconsider and shrink back as you sit. 

“I don’t think you’re a shitty student,” he argues quietly, turning to you and offering you a soft smile, how genuine he sounds making you shift. 

“That’s not what you said at the bar,” you huff, the words coming out of your mouth before you can stop them. If the tension was thick when you walked in, it thickens even further with you mentioning that night, and you mentally kick yourself for bringing it up. 

He falls quiet again, his eyes turning towards the table as thoughts move through his head. You want to eat the words out of the air, rewind time and never bring it up, but instead you’re just forced to sit there and stew in your lapse of judgment. 

“I said some stupid shit that night,” he mumbles, tracing his pencil against his paper and watching it like he’s hypnotized, “did even stupider shit.”

“So you regret it?” You hesitantly ask, keeping your eyes trained on the side of his face in hopes of catching the smallest movement or reaction. 

“Yes,” he breaths, tilting his head back to stare at the ceiling, oblivious to the way your chest tightens, “and no,” he sounds strained, confused as he filters through his thoughts, “I can’t sit here and act like I didn’t enjoy it, but I can’t help but feel like a bad friend.”

“Why would you feel like a bad friend?” 

“Because you know,” he grumbles, moving his hands in front of him as he speaks, “it kind of intrudes on whatever you and Jeno have going on. Not that I know what you two have going on, but to make a move like that on you was kind of a dick head thing to do.”

You jerk back at his rambling, his words coming out too quickly and making your mind take a moment to register what he means. But even when you collected everything he said in your mind, you’re left even more confused than you did that night. 

“What are you talking about?” You interrupt, his shoddy defense and explanation coming to a halt as his head whips towards you, “there’s nothing going on between me and Jeno.”

“What do you mean what am I talking about?” He asks, his eyebrows pulling together tightly as his voice pitches in confusion, “you and Jeno!”

“What about me and Jeno?” You lean towards him, matching his volume as you resist the urge to grab and shake him, “Jeno is my friend.”

“I know that,” he says in frustration, leaning closer to you as well, “but you’re also kind of more than friends, right?”

“No,” you say quickly, shaking your head, “did Jeno say something to you to make you think we were?”

“No,” he says shyly, shrinking back slightly in shame, “but I see the way you two act, and I just thought… you’re always texting and hanging out, and the fact that you never say anything to me directly, it’s always through Jeno.”

You stare at him in shock, the jealousy that drips from his words making your brain feel like it’s coated in mud. 

“Jeno is just fun to get drunk with,” you defend, “and he texts everyone, that doesn’t mean there’s something going on between us,” you feel lost as you speak, the accusations he throws at you making you feel flustered, “and you hate me! So why would I go to you directly?”

You watch as emotions shift across his face, the hope that picks up his features when you confirm you and Jeno are just friends makes your chest warm, but it’s short lived when he deflates at the last thing you say. 

“I don’t…” he groans, moving his hand to roughly swipe at his face, “I’m such an idiot.” 

You move your chair again, bringing it closer to him and forcing yourself into his space before you reach to pull his hand away. 

“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” You ask sternly, the confusion getting too much for you to deal with patiently anymore. 

“You’re going to think I’m an asshole,” he warns, hesitating until you throw him a look that tells him you already think that exactly, “I… when I first met you, I really liked you,” he confesses, his body relaxing as if truth takes a weight off of him, “but you were already friends with Jeno and I thought you were into him, so I figured if I distanced myself from you then I wouldn’t have to think about it. It was just a stupid crush so I didn’t think it was that big of a deal, but when it didn’t go away, and I had to start tutoring you,” he groans in frustration, “I just ended up being a dick to you instead. I feel like a stupid middle schooler, but that’s just how it ended up.” 

You both sit quietly when he finishes speaking, his body visibly shaking slightly as you stew in his explanation. Was it incredibly stupid and immature of him? Yes. But the way you haven’t been able to stop thinking about him, the way he looked at you and touched you, blurred your rationality and made your heart thump wildly in your chest. Even the way he treated you before that night always gave you a weird rush of excitement whenever you were near him; it made shame settle over you, but it still couldn’t fight the urge you felt to accept his confession blindly. 

“If you thought there was something between me and Jeno,” you start, avoiding acknowledging his confession to give you more time to think, “then why did you do what you did the other night?”

“Alcohol?” He tries, sounding unsure and unconvinced as if the word doesn’t fit right in his mouth. 

“Jaemin, you only had one drink,” you hum, rolling your eyes as he starts to beat around the bush again. 

“I’m… very stupid?” 

“You’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met,” you cut him off quickly, throwing him a disappointed look as you roll your eyes, “try again.”

You can see panic settle behind his eyes, the first inkling of fear that you’ve ever seen him show, and it makes concern settle in your stomach. He plays nervously with his fingers, shifting in his seat and sucking in a deep breath before he speaks again.  

“I don’t know,” he speaks honestly, reaching to finally touch you with his hand resting gently on your thigh, “there was just something about what you said that day,” he grunts at the memory, brushing his fingers against your skin as if it helps him think, “and it wasn’t just you saying I don’t have a life, I kind of agree with you on that one, but it was the fact that kept reiterating how good of a guy I am. Even after how I treated you.”

“But you are a good guy,” you defend quietly, moving your hand to lay across his, “I didn’t mean it as a bad thing.”

“I don’t think being a good guy is a bad thing, I try to be a good guy all the time,” he rushes to elaborate, turning his hand to tangle his fingers with yours, “I just… I know good guys aren’t your thing. I let everything get to me, and the way Jeno just laughed when I told him about our argument, I felt like I had something to prove.”

“Maybe you are stupid,” you sigh, trying to keep a straight face until his hand tenses around yours and he jerks back in offense, making a soft smile pull on your lips, “you never had to prove anything to me, and maybe I’m fucked up, but even when you were being a dick I still couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

He bites harshly on his lip, shaking his head in disbelief, “thought about me how?” He asks hesitantly, nervous that the conversation will turn against him, but ready to accept it in shame. 

“When I’d zone out while we were studying,” you start, leaning to whisper softly in his ear, hoping to smother your nerves with faux confidence as you pull your connected hands towards your chest, “all I was thinking about was how your hands would feel on me, and how badly I wanted you to do whatever you wanted to me.”

You watch as a shiver runs up his spine, his nails digging into your skin as his eyes slide shut, “I don’t deserve that,” he mutters, wallowing in doubt as images of you crumbling beneath him flutter through his mind. 

“No,” you agree, moving your free hand to brush against the side of his face, “but that didn’t stop me from wanting it.”

You pull him closer before he can respond, your heart jumping to your throat as you press your mouth softly against his. It feels wrong, like you’re doing something you’re not supposed to, but the familiar taste of his lips warms you enough that you can’t even think about pulling away. 

He deepens the kiss quickly, his hand that’s not squeezing almost painfully around yours reaching to push tightly against the curve of your back. He moans quietly, the sound making your jaw fall open, and when he licks desperately into your mouth, you respond with a moan of your own. 

He forces you out of your seat, guiding you with his palm as he keeps his lips locked to yours. You fumble slightly, your eyes fluttering and making you clumsy to your surroundings, but once he pulls you to straddle his lap, you sink comfortably against his chest. 

Your tangled fingers fall apart as he sucks your bottom lip between his teeth, your arms stretching to curl around his neck as he slides his hands up your side. His fingers tap rhythmically against your ribs, making you curl into him and sigh, but when you feel his hips start to jerk, you tense. 

His palms smooth down until they rest on your hips, the way he pets at your body making a warmth roll over you, and when he pushes down on you until you feel his bulge slide over the crotch of your underwear, you breathe out in surprise. 

“Can’t,” you mumble against his lips, your voice coming out winded and unsure as he guides you to grind against him slowly, “can’t do it here.”

“Why not?” He asks, playful arrogance coating his words, “after you went on about fantasizing about me in this room?” He taunts, using your confession against you, “you shouldn’t have started something you couldn’t finish.”

Jaemin’s ability to go from stoic and shy, to this other being of confidence and shamelessness gave you whiplash, but it also made you melt in his palms. You want to push him away, beg him to take you to your apartment and do whatever he wishes there, but as his fingers grip at the fabric of your skirt and force you to move faster, you can’t imagine having to pry yourself off of him. 

“Don’t want to get caught,” you argue, your body working against your words as you start moving on your own, “someone coul-“

“No one will catch us,” he interrupts, reassuring you as he tilts his head down to kiss down your chin, “we have the room booked for an hour,” he reminds, licking at your jaw, “and it’s better than you letting me fuck you open in the bathroom, yeah?”

Your head falls back at the memories of that night, his tongue smoothing over your throat as you remember how his fingers felt inside you. You bounce more eagerly against him, and when he bites down harshly on your skin, you thread your fingers in his hair and groan. 

You whimper as his greedy fingers brush against the hem of your shirt, his cold skin making you hiss out a swear as they push under the fabric and crawl towards your chest. The first knead against the swell of your flesh is rough, desperate as if he’s dreamed of feeling you under him like this, and when he tugs the cup of your bra away from your body, he immediately pinches your nipple between his knuckles. 

He shoves your shirt up until it bunches under your armpits, the cool air of the room brushing against your partially exposed chest as he ducks down to replace his fingers with his tongue. He laps quickly at your stiffening skin, and when he uses one arm to pull you close again, he wraps his lips around your nipple and bites down. 

You squirm in his hold, pained pleasure spreading across your chest as he abuses your skin with his mouth, and all that fills your ears are your small whimpers and the slick sound of his saliva bouncing against the walls. 

You barely register his free hand tickling down your body, his mouth encapsulating your skin and taking all your attention as he slips his fingers under the hem of your skirt. He gropes mindlessly at your thigh, squeezing roughly at your flesh before he moves to tug at the seam of your underwear. 

You gasp out when his fingers dip into you, his wandering digits slipping to prod at your entrance as he groans against you. You can hear the slick noises of your arousal dripping around his fingers, and when he drags it up to smear it around your clit, your body trembles in his hold. 

“I missed this,” he hums, keeping his lips pouted against your chest as he mumbles without thought, “all I thought about for days, just thinking about how warm you were when I had nothing but my hand.”

You buzz at the thought of him touching himself while thinking of you, the image amplifying how he circles his calloused fingers around your clit. You tilt your hips down to grind against his hand, trying to meet his patterns as you lament not being able to have him sooner. 

You whine when he takes his hand away from your skin, his fingers curling around the seat of your underwear as he pushes it aside, and when you feel the way the denim of his pants brushes against your sensitive skin, your thighs tense around his. 

The sound of him messing with the button of jeans makes you pant in excitement, your fingers pulling roughly at his hair as the metallic sound of his zipper falling open hits your ears. You feel a hunger deep in your belly, a nervous anticipation building in your chest, and when he tugs clumsily at his pants and underwear, it feels like the room around you falls away. 

You feel his length brush against your skin as he pulls himself from the confines of his underwear, the small amount of friction making you both hum and twitch. You glance down as he pushes himself against his stomach, and the size of him wrapped tightly in his fist makes you tilt his head back until your eyes lock together. 

“Please Jaemin I-“ you babble wildly, shifting your body forward until you can grind against the underside of his length, “please, need it.”

“Calm down,” he shushes you, running his hand softly up and down your back as he brings you to press against his chest. 

He handles your body carelessly, moving you how he wishes as he lifts you slightly above him, and when he pushes himself against your entrance, your eyelids flutter. He sinks you down slowly, stretching you open around him, and when your thighs start to shake and broken sighs fall from your mouth, he moves both hands to hold against your sides. 

“Slow down,” he warns as you accidentally shift down, his head tilting so his lips can brush against yours, “don’t hurt yourself.”

You let him pull you down gently, his skin sliding against yours as your arousal drips around him. You feel your body weaken and go lax in his hold as his size overwhelms your senses, and he mumbles soft praises against your lips as his fingers dig into your skin. 

He presses his mouth into yours again once he’s fully seated inside you, the way you clench and shift around him making him smile against your lips, and when he feels the heavy breaths of air that puff from your nose brush his skin, he moves his hand to grab your ass. 

He keeps you still for a moment, reveling in the way your body flutters around him, but when your hips start to jerk as if they have a mind of their own, he grunts in amusement. The way his hands feel against you is more than you could ever imagine, how they brush and dimple your skin makes you feel like he has control over every one of your atoms, and the way he fills you completely makes stars dance behind your eyes. 

Your movements are immediately messy as he moves you to bounce in his lap, his nails scraping at your skin and your legs shaking as you struggle to keep kissing him with the way he fucks you quicker than your fuzzy mind is prepared for. You feel your stomach tensing and your body screaming as he stretches you, but you love every moment you sink down on him with a broken moan. 

He swears crudely against your lips, the way you wrap around him making his hips jump until he’s fucking up into you roughly, and your thighs ache to slam shut as he splits you open perfectly. 

“So perfect,” he moans, his voice strained as he holds you still again, gripping your skin tightly as slams his hips against yours, “take me so well.”

Your head falls against his shoulder as the sound of your skin slapping together rings in your ears. You can feel your arousal start to stick to the inside of your thighs, and with the way he pushes as deeply as possible with every thrust has you crying out and nipping at his neck. 

You huff out when he tightens his arm around your waist, pulling you tightly as the air gets knocked from your lungs, before his tense fingers scrape along the skin of your ass. He scratches against your hip, making the skin burn and rise in his path, until he dips his hand back between your thighs in a rush. 

He presses roughly against your neglected clit, pinching and rolling the skin between his fingers as he continues to thrust against your wildly. He abuses your nerves meanly, toying with you, until he lays his fingers flat against you and starts sliding them against you sloppily. 

A rush of pleasure licks up your spine too quickly for you to handle, your body pushing against his hold as you roll against him. Your hips try to lift away from him, trying to escape his quick fingers, but he holds you tightly and keeps you pressed against his chest as you’re helpless against his touch. 

You clench around him tightly as your orgasm starts to consume you whole, cries of pleasure hitting against the skin of his neck as you sink your teeth into his flesh. He keeps his fingers and hips moving against you, fucking you through the way your nerves feel like they’re on fire, but as you drip and tense around him, he feels himself following close behind you. 

His fingers shake against you, his hips becoming messier as you writhe in pleasure on top of him. He groans and swears loudly as you flutter around him from the overstimulation your body endures, and he only makes it harder when he shifts to fucking you with deeper and slower thrusts, his length dragging and stilling against your sensitive walls as his breathing labors. 

The sound that rattles his chest as he comes makes you delirious, your head lifting like it’s filled with lead as you turn to watch his face screw up tightly. You gasp and pant softly at the feeling of him filling you completely, and watch him with a dazed look as he pushes his hips until they’re flush against you. 

You smile at one another when his eyes open back up, both of your features pulled soft and delirious as you cling to each other. You melt into him as his arms wind around you to pull you into a tight embrace, and for a moment you feel your breathing start to calm as he leans in to brush his nose against yours. 

You don’t think much when his arms tense against you, or the way his thighs continue to shift below you as you scratch your nails against his scalp. You feel warm and sated as you curl around him, but your peace is interrupted as he starts to stand on his wobbling legs. 

You squeak as he lifts you in his arms, your hands falling to grip at his shoulders as he moves you to sit on the edge of the table in front of him, and when he slips out of you, you whine at the sudden emptiness. 

You try to question him, your confusion bubbling at the back of your throat, but it dies on your tongue when he pushes you back. He looks oddly energetic as he watches over you, his fingers moving to dance along the waistband of your skirt as you stare at him with wide eyes. 

“There was one thing I couldn’t stop thinking about after that night,” he starts, his voice gravely and strained as he shakes his head, “and I’m not letting you leave this room until I do it.”

You yelp his name when he grabs your thighs, the way he tugs at your limbs making your head bump against the wood below you as you fall flat, but he ignores your exclamation as his fingers quickly dance back up your skin. 

You squirm when he grabs at your underwear, your thighs trying to slam shut as he tugs the fabric down, but the determination that makes his muscles tense overpowers you as you try to push him away. 

He gets your underwear off with ease, as if the way you kick doesn’t bother him in the slightest, and when you see the still damp cotton twisted around his fingers, you huff in frustration. 

You watch with a pout as he lifts them up with a grin, and when he presses them shamelessly against his face, you let a scandalized shout of his name. 

“You smell amazing, angel,” he compliments sleazily, his words muffled behind the fabric as he makes a show of pressing the damp spot against his septum, “do you think you taste just as lovely?”

He doesn’t present it as a question as much as he does a threat, and when he shoves your underwear deep into his back pocket, you try to push yourself up the table away from him. 

“No you don’t,” he laughs, grabbing your legs before you can get too far, “I know you can handle it.”

You whine when he drops to his knees in front of you, only the top of his head visible as you move to lean on your elbows. You gasp when he tugs you closer to his face, and at the first tap of his tongue against your entrance, your head falls back between your shoulders. 

He keeps your thighs open wide with his tense palms, a wet sound coming from between your legs as he lays his tongue flat against you, and with a shuddering sigh you realize he’s lapping at his come as it drips out of you. 

You clench around his tongue as he pushes it inside of you, the action earning you a deep growl from him that vibrates against your skin, and you wiggle as if you’re possessed from the way he curls his tongue against you. 

He’s messy as he licks at you, his saliva and the new arousal that drips from your spreading to the insides of your thighs and across the lower half of his face. He moans happily against you, holding you tightly against his mouth as he licks you clean, and once he’s gotten every drop of his come from your body, he leans to swipe the flat of his tongue up the length of your cunt. 

You hiss and sob when his lips wrap around your clit, finally being able to see the wild look he holds in his eyes as he sucks at your skin harshly. Your hips cant up roughly, trying to push him off your hypersensitive nerves, but he follows your movements easily as his eyes slide shut in pleasure. 

You sit up quickly as he rolls tongue against you, your hands flying to tug at his hair as your shoulders lift towards your ears and your mouth falls open. Your entire body shivers as pleasure takes over your senses, the heat between your thighs aching painfully as you still aren’t recovered from when he was inside of you, but even with the way you struggle against him, he happily licks at you in hunger. 

Your second orgasm builds too quickly, your feet moving to hit against his shifting shoulders as he lays his tongue flat against you before shaking his head. The sounds he makes below you are vulgar and make your skin hot to the touch, and before you can even think to beg for sympathy, you feel your body start to fall apart at the seams. 

You can’t control the sounds that spill from your lips, mindless words getting lost in the mix of syllables and broken moans as your hips start to roll against his face, and before your mind can come to terms with what he’s doing to you, your orgasm washes over you in violent bursts. 

He laps at you greedily as your hands push at the back of his skull, seemingly glad to be smothered by your body as he loosens his hold until your thighs close around his head. His eyes flutter open again, looking up at you with a look drenched in satisfaction and pride, and all of it combined makes you shudder harshly. 

You both gasp when he finally pulls away, both of you sinking back in relief as he stands back on his feet with a rattling intake of air. His face is slick with your arousal when he leans into you again, but he seems unfazed by his state as he wastes no time before pressing his mouth into yours. 

The taste of both of your orgasms that sticks to his tongue spreads across your taste buds as he licks into your mouth, and the way it invades your senses makes you sigh and twitch. You can feel the wetness on his skin transfer to yours as he kisses you hungrily, but as he pushes his hips between yours and lays his chest flush against you, you can’t find it in yourself to care. 

“You’re so perfect,” he mumbles as he pulls away in apprehension, “I will never forgive myself for acting the way I did and pushing you away.”

“Jaemin,” you huff, kissing across his face as his fingers grab at you as if you’ll slip away, “there’s no point in worrying about that now.”

You both know that’s not true, that whatever is happening between you two will need a deeper discussion, but with how you press against each other in hopes to make up for wasted time, it pushes rationality to the side. 

“I’ll do everything I can to make up for it,” he nods, looking you intensely in the eye, his still remaining desperation buzzing around him, “I’ll do anything you ask me.”

“Really?” You ask, breaking the tension with the playful tone you adopt without thinking, but he hums in agreement eagerly regardless, “then can I have my underwear back?”

“Oh,” he jerks back in shock, pausing to think, “which pair?”

“Both?” You say in suspicion, not liking the guilty look that pulls on his features. 

“Oh that’s not happening.”

[technologyculturedneo]

Secret Room. Jaemin

"What happened that night, should stay between us. I don't know you and you don't know me. Got it?"

PAIRING. husband!Na Jaemin x detective intern!Reader

SUMMARY. Na Jaemin. A decent young respectable business man, husband, father and family affair man. He's idolized, admired, and highly praised with high esteem within his social circle. However, his morally perfect world falls apart when getting entangled with you in a one night stand. One lustfully pleasing night together doesn’t prepare you for the chaos that soon follows when Jaemin is accused of murdering his daughter. The crazy thing, is that you know he didn't do it, because he was with you that night, but now you’re tasked with writing a report on his innocence guilt.

WARNINGS. Mentions of: Death (both minor and heavy), Smut (including and not limited to cheating, heavy/soft intercourses, pussy eating kink, foreplay, dry humping, dom and sub con, consensual etc.) And Cursing (minor use)

GENRE. Longshot! Side chick and husband romance. Cheating scandal. Strangers to lovers(?) Angst yet lively. Gore but only towards the end. Twisted cheating romance.

You've been an intern detective writer for more over 9 months now and you're extremely prideful in the work you do. Being able to 'have eyes at the back of your head' or being known as 'sharp’ is an esteemed word and/or phrase that your higher executives prefer to use when describing you. Maybe you're selfish and tend to be heavily guarded, and perhaps even self centered, however- as you see everything and nothing gets past you, you're surprised how you let a man slip right through your rib cage and straight into your soul.

With that title in head, you should've known from the moment you stumbled through the unfamiliar door, that the man you were about to fuck was a father, a husband. Of course the signs weren't there when you entered the dark house, when you began making out radically and bumping left and right into things. The signs weren't there, however the wall you pushed him against had a framed picture of him wearing an adorned suit and a lady dressed in heavenly white. You could only make out her smile as it was too dark, but something in you told you she was his. You should've stopped, but the need to satisfy your craving was so strong. You continued to suck his face off as he ran his hands up your waist to unzip the zipper of your tightened leather black dress. You laughed into the kiss as he gripped your flesh underneath your thigh and sat your body up onto a dresser which made you slightly elevated- you aligned yourself in a position where your lips would still be attached as your hands roamed his dark hair while he began pulling your strapless dress down. His eyes, star gaze with a black hole of lust, looked up into your own thirsty sinister eyes after taking in the view of your nudity, of you not wearing underwear.

"Very naughty," he laughed instantly diving for your thighs with sloppy and hungry kiss bites. "Can I?"

"Anything you want Mr Big Shot,"

As his slippery tongue meets up with your heated core you buck up into his face moaning out aloud, your whole body radiating with pleasure. Your arms shoot back trying to maintain your balance against the dresser- that you don't notice when you knock over more framed pictures. The framed pictures consists of a young girl being held tightly and wrapped in the arms of her loving parents, another photo is of the man and his wife smiling after a graduation they had attended for their daughter finishing pre school and the last two of the man's daughter starting out in her first grade and winning an award. The shattering sounds of the frames are covered by the loud gasping moan that leave your lips. You're groaning out the married man's name.

A name which you've only learnt an hour ago, yet someone else who's learnt it for a far longer period- tries as hardest as they can to scream it out. Trying to scream out (without a clue of how) for help. Tears spread across the eyes of the watcher as blood drips from their forehead, and clogs the person's throat, while they still try so hard to scream out the name. "Abah-"

"Ahh~" However, you, eluded with pleasure passionately yell out his name only making him laugh and the vibration coursing all around your body. "Jaemin don't stop," You breathe, gasping out when your legs begin to shake. Although he pulls his moist lips and tongue away from your core, they travel up your navel to your breast before finally getting to your neck just as he unfastens his belt and prepares his hard shaft for your entrance. He picks you up by your thighs again, balancing your body weight against the dresser. His hips are hard and fast paced when slamming straight into you. You arch your back just as his teeth grunt out by how warm and soft you feel inside of him, his eyes erotically shut by how good you feel against him while he continues placing sweet bites on your chest. Being overwhelmed by pleasure you shut your eyes tightly as his eyes roam down your figure. His thumbs playing with your nipples at the same time trying to ravage the dress off your body.

"Feels good, doesn't it?" You pant out. "I still don't believe this is your first time. You're a professional,"

"Not my first time," Jaemin breaks s smile from his pleasured erotic face. "But I've never had it like this, you feel so good,"

"I know," You moan out, straining your eyes to stay open and fixed on his sensational gaze, but your eyes shut in ecstasy.

His voice raspy and hot rhetorically edging you on, fucking you dumb and senseless that you can barely open up your eyes. His eyes are all over your face, his hands patting your head gently running his fingers through your hair. "You're so warm."

Jaemin thrusts hard into you, sweat dripping down the middle of his back and forming on patches of his forehead. The last time he went this hard, was probably too far into his past to collect, (too far and way back) however tonight, being balls deep into your core and feeling his own heart emulate with so much pleasure. His lips press onto the side of your neck, while burying himself deeply into your throbbing and clinching core as his hand grip hard onto your skin.

Your eyes flatter open, but all you can see are stars in the darkened room before your eyes roll to the back of your head. "Oh my soul," you pant out, still feeling him, squeezing him, the surge of pleasure coating your entire being.

When meeting him at the bar, you immediately wanted to fuck him. However, he intrigued you by his way of talking and you ended up... indulging into the conversation, sharing and actually getting to know him. That's why, as he's thrusting with layers of passion, and you feel just how much he wants you, you know just how much he needs this. He mentioned his life being surrounded by doing things for others, that he never got to do anything for himself. You couldn't relate, however after engaging with him and sorta trying to to understand him (which was out of character for you) you really wanted to satisfy him especially since it's what he wanted.

His whole body is attentive to you and you can absolutely feel just how concentrated he is. Him caring for you and solely taking time to please you- especially after getting to know him, only makes you want to treasure his heart. It's not everyday a random stranger pours out their soul and actually gets you to listen. Most of the time, if someone didn't give you what you wanted, you wouldn't spare a second on them. Yet somehow you feel open to this man...

He feels so good to you. It's so good that you lose your mind when you're suddenly picked up and placed carefully against the couch and he's in you once again.

He takes his time, not fast as before, yet with the same passion his lips kiss every part of your body. He carefully calls out your name, whispering how good you feel, how soft your body is, how inviting you are and how glad he is to have met you. He's so engrossed in praising you, and it's so contagious that you pass on the same praises as you get down on your knees taking your turn in making him feel special.

He deserves an award. You make sure that as you suck him off, that your eyes are on his gorgeous ones, blessing him with the sight of how good you feel sucking him off. He bites his lips panting out softly. You watch as the pleasure builds up in his face. His hand passes through your hair when you go deeper on his shaft and your tongue glaze over his balls. His toes are clinching together and his teeth are so tight on his lip that he throws his neck back in ecstasy when feeling the blood. You're taking him in so well that it takes everything in him not to bust in your mouth- your warm mouth that salivates as you gag onto him using your hand as well to pump him up and down as you start choking yourself on his dick.

His grip that's on your hair gets tighter that he lets go afraid of hurting you- instead his hips have a mind of their own especially when thrusting up into your mouth a bit more faster then your original pace. He squeezes onto the chair but you take a hold of his hand allowing him to squeeze you instead. With one hand in his and the other supporting you in stroking him, you're sure that he's holding himself in to not let go yet. You go faster and faster, his timid groans growing louder and deeper and his grip gets tighter and harder, the pressure rising and creating tight knots that-

"Shit!"

He squirts out in plentiful flows of passion. His eyes adjust to the new found bliss, his body relaxes into the new sensation of pleasure and his dick moves on its own with happiness- jolting and twitching. It leaves his dick in streams and long strokes that makes him shocked by his own cum. Or maybe he's so shocked by how well you open up your mouth and stick out your tongue, not allowing a single sperm to leave your mouth. His wife would never. You swallow down the salty flavored goo and laugh out by his worn out appearance.

"Have you never been sucked before?" He shakes his head with stars still in his eyes as he tries to catch his breath. You smile and rub his knees as the desire and urge takes over you to take over him when his member comes to life again. "Well Jaemin, I'm gonna make you feel so good tonight. Do you wanna feel good?"

He doesn't even know how to respond, but with the way his member jolts forward again you read his excited eyes and go on.

Another round of his passion oozing out of him and dropping onto you, has you feeling really special and lucky. You've gratefully caught a big pot of gold with Jaemin. You both can't stop moaning out each other's name. Your bodies merging so well and instantly that you feel almost delusional and believe you've found the one. You can't help it, you've never experienced a one night stand like this. It started out as talking and then fucking for pleasure, but now you're joined and connected on the couch as if you were blissfully talking as you were in the bar. You feel as though you are carved for him, that your body was carved for him alone. You both explore different positions and even have him eat you out again- it's something he really wanted to try and you told him to do as he pleased because truly he deserved all the pleasure. After all, you both wanted to benefit something from this one night stand. If you were being honest, it was more then a one night stand. You felt joint t him.

With the way you both aligned, you can't help but want to give him your number, just so that he can hit you up whenever. You'd surely fall on your knees for him again. And you can't say that for everybody.

After half an hour of going down on each other and filling each other up with your fluids, you're resting on the long couch against Jaemin's chest with his arms wrapped around you- securing you.

The lights are on. They're slightly dimmed down.

Your arms hold him around his torso as you bask in the silence and soft lullaby of your breaths. Your warm bodies heating each other up. Your legs tangle again with his, loving the feel of having him so close to you. His eyes are shut drifting in and out of sleep, while yours are open. He wants to compliment you at how great you were without sounding too strange or being delusional, so he tries his best to look for the words.

Meanwhile your eyes are suddenly dead open and panned to a photo frame on the wall. You were simply staring at the photo thinking of how great Jaemin was that you didn't pay mind to the photo... until you saw the smile of the woman in the photo.

The photo... he's happily looking down at the petite shining woman with beautiful short brown hair. Like you stated, you knew he was married because of the photos that kept looking at you while you both fucked. But you didn't really think he was married!

You're absolutely gutted upon seeing the photos. Your eyes roam around to see what else you can find, and surely the living room is packed with photos on different sides. Not only of the lady that seems to be his wife, but of a young girl. Your lips tremble in anger and you close your eyes.

You hate the feeling you're feeling for only now realizing that he is a married man and you've slept with him. A married man with a child. It's only now that you feel an odd object on his left hand. It must be his ring. Fuck. The feeling of guilt, shame and deception wash over you that you slowly retreat your hands from his torso.

You hate being in this position. The position of being a middle woman.

You aren't a middle woman- yet you've been in this position one too many times. But unlike the other times, you don't leave right away. You want to know why. Why he'd cheat?

Well... assuming his wife isn't dead or he didn't divorce. You'd feel so much more better that he's single, but with the pictures around and the ring on his finger, you don't want to fool yourself. His warm chest and bulging arms have you in a state of warmth feeling safe, yet his deceitful nature makes you feel dirty and raw. Does he hold his wife like this, or is it only you?

"Jaemin," You call softly onto his name, hearing him hum out in the same silk like voice as yours. He's surely feeling too peaceful around you, because the second he hums out, his hands trace your back again and he plants a kiss on the top of your head.

"Yes?"

"Did you enjoy it?"

His low chuckle is from the inside, it gurgles out of him and you can tell there's a smile on his face- a large one that is. He nods his head, licking his lips. He still doesn't have any words for how satisfied he is feeling, but since you've brought it up, his lips are running even before he can think. "I really did. It felt so good- in fact you felt so good. I can't explain it in words, but I.... The best I've had in years, actually,"

You're left speechless. Completely speechless. If you didn't know about his wife, you'd feel good that you did a go job, you'd even take it a step further and ask if he wanted to hook up more with you- because surely tonight, a bond was made.

Except you don't want any part of him, knowing he's got his own.

"Where's your wife?"

Your question forces his eyes to stop wondering and to snap back into a distressed reality. He isn't expecting that.

Your tone isn't even sharp, but when it leaves your lips you're sure he feels it too. He feels how disappointed and disgusted you are in him. "I get that we’re both grown adults and can do whatever the fuck we want, but was this really necessary? Are you kidding me? Fuck,” You roll your eyes.

Jaemin stays silent. Shame. A disappointing reality where he can't have what he wants. His arms try to rest around you a little longer but you're already turning and shifting, which makes him uncomfortable.

"I was transparent with you. So why lie to me?" You utter out. Trying to let him know that you made him an exception into your heart.

He seemed so true and good. Someone you wouldn't mind meeting again. But now, you've just stained him. He stained you too, yet you wonder why you're feeling upset instead of angry. Maybe because you feel betrayed again...and not by him...but by your ex. Your ex who was everything but faithful to you.

"A guy like you seems so loyal. So why?" You ask.

"You wouldn’t have agreed to sleep with me if you knew I was married.” Jaemin sits up detaching his arms from your body making you feel cold. His tone is monotone. As if he's shut down. “I too was transparent when I said I only want sex."

"Do you honestly think this was only sex?"

"Thanks for tonight." Jaemin avoids the question, you feel angry when he wears his pants with no shame or remorse within his tone.

You don't even waste another second in his presence as you begin to dress up as well. Feeling dirty as if you cheated on yourself. You clean yourself up with the tissue handkerchief in your purse and throw it in the bin. You walk over to the door (that you first stumbled into with Jaemin) and you sigh out. You fish for your phone, calling on a taxi cab.

Once you make the call waiting for the taxi to come, your eyes are latched onto Jaemin who moves around the living room (where you two were intimate) and cleans up all the traces of shame making sure that everything is cleaned up neatly and back into place. He cleans up the house and sweeps the broken glass pieces before finishing and standing by the door, nervously watching you as you impatiently wait for your ride.

His eyes are soft and keep still on you. His hands fidgeting not knowing where to be, on his hair, pocket, fixing his shirt- you wonder why he's nervous, but you ignore him.

"Thank you for the night. I enjoyed it." His little smile flatters his face upon looking at your upset face. “Do you think we could meet up again?”

You roll your eyes glaring in his direction. "You're such an asshole. Do you not feel guilty?"

"Can we please not talk about that? Can we just... ignore it?" He's backsliding again. Creating a smoke screen, as if what he did won't come into light. "Did I make you feel good?" He goes on.

You feel guilty watching him do that, watching him watch you with eyes of excitement. How does he feel no shame for what he did?

Upon the arrival of your taxi, the guilt washes away and you slam his door making sure to leave the shame behind. You didn't want any of that. You don't want any of that. You don't want to be reminded of how good it felt, because by doing that you're only cheating again in your mind to a poor woman who most likely didn't deserve it.

You clinch your jaw the whole drive, thinking of how perfect Jaemin felt. You're angry at yourself for letting your pussy feel things, for letting your heart feel attached. If you knew he was a father, a husband- you wouldn't even have slept with him- so then why did you continue even after seeing the pictures of him and his wife?

Pussy over brain?

Perhaps because of how much he put into it?

Maybe because, you know that he looked at you, but his attention was in your heart.

Love at first sight? Lust at first sight? Which was it?

He literally made love to you...that wasn't fucking, that was love making. You know the pain of being cheated on, so for you to be feeling this- just makes you wonder if Haechan, your ex, was just as into it as Jaemin.

You caught Haechan, sleeping in bed with the girl. You don't know whether she forgot to leave or if he wanted her to stay (the same way Jaemin asked you), but one thing you do know is that she stayed with him and cuddled up so close to him. He looked so peaceful. You got in the room and even had enough time to sit and watch them wake up together. They kissed until they noticed your presence. In an instant Haechan with unknown speed and adrenaline- he jolted with such worry on his face and begged for your forgiveness in hopes that you'd forgive him.

That stupid fucker forgot he was butt naked when apologizing to you.

Is Jaemin feeling like he's on top of the clouds because he didn't get caught? Maybe he is. But you know how this whole cheating thing ends. Although you and Haechan broke up years ago, it still stung, as it left a dirty impact on you. It the reason you started sleeping around, to avoid the pain. It's also the reason you focused on getting ahead in your workplace. Anything and everything to make yourself by dwell.

And now thinking of Jaemin's wife, you can't help but harden your heart.

Stupid men.

Jaemin will get caught one day.

You just hope that you'll never ever be in a position that'll ever make you look like a middle woman. Again.

Of course, over the years after your break up, you slept around and the guilt came from sleeping with other men who were in relationships and the women had caught you sleeping with their significant other.

It's traumatic and you're refusing to experience or relive those moments again. All because of what happened tonight.

Love is dying because of people like you.

So when you get back home laying down on your bed you close your eyes and force yourself to sleep. Although your body is tired and wants to sleep, your soul is awake and reliving the moments you spent in Jaemin's arms. The way he held you and made you feel his all was absolutely something new for you. Usually on your day off from the Police Academy, you'd spend your full day and night in the house resting up your body from the intense police training. However whenever you'd feel spontaneous and a bit horny, you'd walk out your house in the most eye catching outfit and make your way to the bar. Most of the guys you'd meet were not talkers and just went straight for the gist of fucking you. However Jaemin...

"Why can't I stop thinking about him?" You stuff your head on the pillow.

He initiated such an intriguing conversation, capturing your attention for the whole night. Very soft spoken with his raspy voice, had hooking eyes and a mesmerizing smile. You thought he was drunk out of his mind, turns out that's when he's the most functional when trying to hide his stress. The burning lust was behind those sluttery words he'd use to describe how 'so sexy' you were. The sex talk sorta just happened when you put your desires aside to talk and engage with him. You spent your night talking in sexy and tried your hardest to not pounce on his handsome self.

Your conversations involved smut talk, erotica fantasy thoughts and flirtatious touches here and there. He was so dignified and interesting that when he asked you to go back to his place with him, you didn't hesitate to accept. The moment you got close to the door he said he wanted to kiss you, to make sure he wasn't going to regret his choice- and then right outside that bar, you began making out with him. And my oh my was he impeccable. He was a fine young looking man with the sex drive of a demon and you had expectations. He met them for sure- but at what cost?

Hurting his wife and kid while trying to please himself.

You drift off to sleep, ending your Sunday night...pre Monday morning with thoughts over the man Jaemin and how you've landed yourself another mark on being a middle woman.

This has to stop.

So when you wake up Monday morning with determination, you make sure to be set and focused and not think about the night you had. You want to do good today, to make up for the bad of the previous night.

And luckily for you, the moment you get there's a case ready and prepared to be investigated on.

"You'll go with Detective Jaehyun." Your eyes widen when you hear your name paired with the fast paced senior of your entire company district, Detective Jung Jaehyun.

Without wasting a second you get off the discussion table and run behind Jung Jaehyun when his long legs are already walking out the door. You've been on the field for about 13 months now, and you know which ways to go prior to your previous supervisors. It's due to discipline, priority, hard work and dedication why you were the remaining intern out of a set of 10 who you came in with. Each month, you kept pushing yourself and redeeming your qualities to prove yourself worthy to be a full working member of the KPS detectives.

So setting on your game face, you follow Jaehyun who's already outside the building looking at his clock while leaning on his car.

"3 minutes late." He says when looking up at you with a stern gaze.

You point your hand backwards. "The elevator was-"

"That's not my business. Are there no stairs? Exactly." Jaehyun opens his door inserting his foot inside and getting in.

You quickly follow, not wanting to set a bad impression of yourself, after all if you're paired with him it must mean that they've finally recognized your skill set and are (probably) ready to have you in their company.  And what better way to know if you're ready then to send you off on a serious case mission with one of the most toughest trooper alive.

"Once dismissed and sent on field, you should be in the car within a minute. Child murder cases are one of the most toughest, as families expect the police to quote on quote do something. As if it's somehow our fault that these things happen."

You say nothing as Jaehyun retaliates and communicates all by himself somehow having an issue with the case- but from his words you can tell that he also has a problem being paired (or stuck on babysitter mode as he said) with you. Without even a single breath from your end, he drives and follows the GPS coordinates for the house you're supposed to meet the family. Being time sensitive, Jaehyun is already driving into the drive through by the 15 minute mark and walking up the stairs with you following behind grumpily- not long after a minute, other police cars begin to show up.

"I don't want a word from your corner. Zip it until you're spoken to." Jaehyun states as he knocks on the door of the family. "However, what you can do, is what you're interned here for. Write. Write as much as you can about the scene and when we get back to the office, you leave it on my desk. I'll go over it and see if you're needed on the case or not. Tip of advice, make it good because if it were up to me, you'd be gone 4 months ago with the other rookies. There's no room for selfish and standoffish personalities in crime and investigation. Hate to cut it to you, but you don't belong here. Your continuation with our department all depends on the report you'll leave on my desk. Got it?"

Sucking in a breath, you nod your head just in time for the door to swing open with a teary eyed woman.

Only been on the scene a few times, you've managed to always keep a poker face to conceal all your emotions, yet when the broken mother breaks down with every word she tells the officer and investigators you can't help but show just a little bit of emotion.

Sincerely hoping that perhaps you can sympathies with her. Okay...maybe you also did it for selfish reasons being that if she warms up to you, she may prefer to talk to you a lot and that would mean Jaehyun would need to back off. After all, your job is suddenly on the line again.

You walk around the house taking down note of the scenery presented wondering from where you'll start. According to the mother, she has reason to believe that her daughter was killed. Even though there's no body present, the bloody scene of the child's room and even the corridor that has a trail of blood is evidential enough to back up her theory. In the process of writing down and paying close attention to detail and conversation, your mind slowly starts to divert...

Especially after walking into the living room...

There's a long couch. A fireplace. Some dressers with pictures on top. There's also an entry that leads to a long hallway before the front door.

Your lips get dry when your full focus is brought upon one large picture hanging on the hall.

It's a wedding canvas of a woman and man happily linked together.

Jaehyun scoffs. "To think, a murder case occuring to an infamous business man."

"It's too early to suspect anyone, but we're strongly leaning on the husband." An investigator states lowly while entering the living room with Jaehyun. "His side of the story doesn't add up or make any sense. He claims he wasn't at home yet his wife says otherwise. And then he said he came home for a little while but went out again, because he received a work call. But when we asked again he said he went to a club. His narrative gradually became harder to follow, he mentioned that the child went for a sleep over but the wife said something else, but he kept pushing out different stories until he said he'd go out to clear his head."

"How many months is she pregnant?” Jaehyun asks casually seeing you frozen in the living room.

“Hasn’t said a word, seems to be in her prime months so perhaps 4 or 5, fuck me even 2, who knows?” The investigator states.

“Let’s be careful to not start out with a bang." Jaehyun mentions after following your gaze, taking one look at the enlarged photo on the wall. "After all they are public figures." He sighs upon recognizing the face of the man, or rather the already proclaimed suspect. "Owner of Cyberport Cultured Neo Hotels. We need to make sure we’ve got solid and hard proof to pin him down, otherwise this will be a case the media will intrude in. We don’t want that. Got it?"

"Yes sir," The investigator nods his head.

"Well were is he?" Jaehyun sighs while stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Your ears are alert when hearing a door shut. Your eyes divert to the figure emerging from the hall way and it feels like deja vu all over again. Suddenly the hallway where you passionately made out seems to be so clear and vivid in your mind. You can see yourself moaning out his name and him carrying you and placing you on the dresser with pictures. You blink your eyes, hoping that the man that you see now is not the man that you were with hours ago. He's dressed in a black leather jacket. The same leather jacket you set your eyes on at the late night club, the same leather jacket you helped to remove while in your prime thirst of lustful need, that same jacket that fitted and adorned the man who made you feel all sorts of wild emotions of ecstasy and bliss, the man who kissed and called your name like you were making love in heaven...that same man is now looking back at you.

But instead of pure need and lust- his face is struck with horror.

"Jaemin?" You whisper out.

Your name leaves his lips barely above a whisper and he can't help but be frozen in place when remembering your features. He wanted to meet you again...but he didn't think it'd be this soon...in this circumstance. Here you are in the light of his house, wearing a black uniform with a local departments badge on your shoulder, looking just as crazed as he is.

It feels like you've been caught. “Shit.”

It feels like you can’t breath, and if matters can’t get any worse, his wife walks in the living room. Her petite frame looms below him and in her dried out and tear stained face, she wraps her arms around his neck placing a light peck on his lips muttering words of encouragement and asking if he’s feeling any better. As she brings his frozen head down to peck his lips, his eyes are dead locked on your own- even when his wife’s lips touch his, his eyes are only on you. Your chest rises up and down before you spin around rapidly blinking and clearing your throat ignoring the daunting look of Jaehyun. 

-

Jaehyun leans over his desk folding his arms. Ever since the crime scene log, you were very spaced out and Jaehyun wondered why is it that you’ve been on edge. 

Your legs anxiously shake as you grip the material of your trousers, eyes long zoned out with your appearance resembling a corpse. Jaehyun picks up the report again, peeking up from your printed out report feedback sheet taking in your distraught face trying to get your attention, which is far gone. He reads over the last paragraph again before setting the papers on the desk calmly. You don’t budge.

“I’ll get straight to the point.” Jaehyun speaks just as you find yourself jumping in your seat upon hearing his voice. “Do you know Mr. Na Jaemin?”

Jaehyun’s question forces you to grow alert and anxious. Your freaking job is on the line, and you’ve been partnered up with a bulldozer official detective who will not hesitate to send you home- one wrong move and your whole career is gone. You hesitantly nod your head pursing your dry lips together before answering. “He’s a pioneer working in the most sought out for hotels. He’s infamous. Why would I not know him?”

“Valid.” Jaehyun nods his head, yet lifts up the report as if proving an unknown point. “Then what is this report? Out of everyone in the house, you only saw it fit to interview or rather lay out your facts on him? Was he the only person in the house? Aside from that, regarding the report, it seems that you’re exclusively trying to defend him.”

“What?” Your eyes widen. “No.”

“He’s the only name on this report, alongside the other mindless information you put in.”

Your lips stutter before the words come out. “That’s b-because you and the investigators are adamant on locking him up as if he’s the culprit. We’ve barely had enough time to investigate yet you’re already pinning him-”

“Is there anything wrong with claiming he’s a suspect?”

“No there isn’t, but-”

“But what?” Jaehyun leans on his desk his gaze going over your stressed out face. “What is it? Why are you eyes set on him?”

Your head itches and you so desperately want to scratch it without looking like an idiot. Did you really only write about Jaemin? “I’m sorry sir, but he’s a well-known figure. His daughter got murdered-”

“He was in the house at the time it happened.” Jaehyun interrupts. “Is that not suspicious to you?”

You breathe out knowing your argument is weak and could get you removed off premises effective immediately. “It’s not. The whole scene is too clean and the way it’s playing out with Jaemin being a suspect is already suspicious! H-how sure are we that he was the only one in the house? I’m telling you that there has to be someone else behind this. We didn’t even investigate. Have you ever been in a situation where a crime is happening and you have no idea that it’s taking place- yet coincidentally you’re at the place and happen to be a victim but everyone is pointing you out to be a culprit? I strongly believe that this is the position in which Na Jaemin is in. There are many rooms in that house specifically 4. One for him and his...wife and the other was for his child. He could’ve been in his study while the crime was taking place, more over he could’ve been doing something else, who knows, he doesn’t want to expose what he was doing, however in his eyes I can tell that he didn’t do it. Maybe he forgot to close the door and an intruder entered and he couldn’t hear a thing because the intruder was quick. Perhaps the intruder was already in the house when he claimed that he got back, or even the intruder could be someone that works in the house. Who knows? Maybe-"

"You're an intern right?" His question completely stops you. You realized that you've gone overboard in Jaemin's defense. However that's not what the Detective Jaehyun says, because his next words are so sharp that you wished you never even opened up your mouth. "Prove his innocence. I want to know where he was, what he was doing and most importantly how he didn't know his daughter was in the next room being killed. Full report, facts, witnesses and most importantly and effective is evidence."

You breathe.

"If you wish to be a detective writer and want to keep your job here, show me that fire." He gets up picking his black leather jacket on his chair. "I've got cartel, intel and speculations, I usually work alone yet for your intern benefits I'll be trusting you with the victim slash but not comfortable suspect. Try not to mess up. That fire in your eyes right now is what I want to see in your report. Get working."

_

You feel like your heart has stopped.

Because you knew exactly were Jaemin was out through the night of the murder, you thought that you had some leverage and could easily persuade the expecting heart of Detective Jung Jaehyun. However your entire world falls apart when a portion of the evidence you'd use was already tainted with your presence. You had gone to the club where you met Jaemin and with your badge of authority demanded the tapes for analysis.

The owner gave you the section part you asked for (22:00-00:00), with all the relevant angles of the outside area as well as inside. Sitting by your assigned desk going through the video, you felt a peak of satisfaction watching over you as Jaemin's figure entered the bar and the camera caught it in 4k- heck you could even say 5k because of how clear the footage was. He sat on the bar stool that was close to the entrance and the timestamp was within the hours of the murder. He spent a long time in there continuously drinking. Your smile enlightened your face and you couldn't help but already begin on your report.

Everything came crashing down the moment you stupidly realized that you were also there! It didn't help that when you looked at the screen you saw a feminine figure with jet black long hair and a leather black body con dress sit close to Jaemin. At first you're confused of seeing the lady...until you realize IT'S YOU!

Right there in 4k- heck 5K, your back is to the camera yet when you get up and turn around your face can be seen clearly. You and Jaemin share a drink and although your convo is muted, you spend a long time with Jaemin and the timestamp draws nearer to the predicted hour of the incident. You physically shy away and frail like a lizard when Jaemin in the footage moves close to your seemingly expectant self and his lips attach to yours. His kiss - as you remember - was slow yet passionate. He's someone who kisses with his all. Seeing his lips against yours- you can't help but feel an intense amount of guilt wash over you when thinking of his pregnant sweet wife. She didn't deserve this but for some reason a cruel master above has set you up for defamation.

Jaemin takes a hold of your hand and pays for the half finished drinks before leading you to the back. You follow with the security camera and when Jaemin makes it to the backdoor- your eyes pop out when the heavy make out session between the two of you turns wild. You're brought back to that night, how badly you wanted to take him in, make him cum in you right there and didn't care for whoever's watching.

You instantly get out of the security camera footage sending all the files to a little USB drive. You quietly sit in your seat with your head pressed up against your palms. What the hell were you going to do now? Your thoughts are all over the place and you lose track of time not realizing that the sky slowly changes colour; from a sky blue to an almost faded pink-orange hue.

"Fuck." You lowly curse. "What am I going to do now?"

After a moment of thought and moment of silence you get up from your seat and head out. As an intern, you aren't allowed to have a company car and any forms of transportation you'd need, you would need to go with Detective Jung Jaehyun. But with what you were going to do, there's no way you'd want him to tag along. You stand by the lift while sending in a request for an Uber driver.

The thought of an Uber driver makes you think about the night prior when you ordered an Uber driver home... Could it be possible that there was any surveillance outside while you left? If so, that could really help.

Once you're outside and notice the sky color you wonder if you should just clock out instead, but with the driver already outside you don't think twice and just go. The street area is quiet, vacant and you wonder if any houses have security camera as there are no poles of cameras around. You mentally note in your head to check the surrounding blocks and houses nearby if they've got outside cams just in case there aren't any security cams.

As expected some police car departments are present. Cautiously announcing your presence, you're met with only the usual yellow tape surrounding the house with a cleanup team. However the small family of mother and father.....actually the husband and wife, aren't there. With the investigation going on and their daughters blood stains everywhere, they thought it would be best to leave the house vacant so they're staying at a hotel. Thankfully you're given the address, the address of the infamous hotel in which Jaemin owns, but when you catch the sight of the backyard and the sight of black hair with an infamous jacket you sigh out in relief.

It hasn't even yet been a day. You came to work, introduced to your partner, met the family of whom you were to investigate their daughters murder, got appointed to Jaemin, went to the club to get tapes, came back to work to watch the taped and finally being met here...in Jaemin's house, where everything began. You can't help but sigh. It's already been such a long day and afternoon and all you want is get the case over and done with. You didn't like that your private life was on the line of a murder investigation. The faster your prove Jaemin's innocence, the faster you can redeem your position at work and actually be assigned an intern role where you can prove yourself and skills.

This case, with Jaemin in it, isn't proving your skills, it's dangerous and could tarnish your reputation and adding a black stamp and disapproval. You truly need this job, and the faster your finish it, the faster you can move on from this whole mess.

Walking down the backyard stairs and across the little garden where you see Jaemin's eyes fixed on the something in his hand. As you get closer, you see it's a little beige wrist band. "Listen," you start out, probably alarming him because his head sharply snaps to you. Ignoring his tired face, you breathe out. "We need to talk about us."

Jaemin blinks and his jaw clinches. He wipes on his red eyes with back of his hand before they disappear in the pockets of his black leather jacket.

"I found the security-"

"My fucking daughter just died."

Are the first words to leave his lips. They're quiet, yet they were sharp to silence you.

He tilts his head to the side, while his eyes shimmer with disappear. "And you're here wanting to talk about us?"

Your mouth closes feeling your heart shrink by your insensitivity. Jaemin's eyes scrunch up with such distaste, before they're remorseful and turn away.

"She died in my house while I was fucking you and you want to talk about us right now? You came all the way to..."

He can't even look at you, and inside your soul you break by his will to hold himself together while he terribly struggles as the tears leave his eyes. He's quick to use his back hand to wipe the tears but they're already apparent to you.

"My daughter... my little girl...my healthy precious gem, my princess is dead somewhere out there and missing. Fucking missing...and you..." Jaemin's lips tremble. And his tired eyes, exhausted red eyes get watery and your heart stops. He exhales and closes his eyes stuffing his hand with that little beige wrist band in his pocket before glaring up at you. "Don't you dare think that just because we slept together makes us official. What happened that night should stay between us. I don't know you and you don't know me. Got it?"

You're so wrapped up in not getting your ass fired that you forget that something so sensitive had happened. Despite him cheating, he has...had a daughter who he cared for. You see it in his eyes when he blinks and a tear falls down from his eye. He's quick to wiping it away, but it's enough to cause a vain to bulge from his forward and for his face to furrow while looking down.

Your heart aches.

You've always loved the idea of starting a family. You remember that when you were still with Haechan all the conversations you'd had about kids. You both wanted kids. So to see someone who had a kid be in mourning, makes you feel so insensitive.

Did you even care to see the face of the child who was killed?

Even a picture?

No.

All you thought about, was your one night stand with the father of the child.

Your eyes pane down to your clasped hands. "I'm so sorry. I really am." You try to look for the words but you're speechless. You don't have your own kids, so you wouldn't know what he's feeling. But you gulp down and turn back to him, who had taken out the band again to simply look at it. "How old was she?"

It was already in your report briefing file, but after being so insensitive you figure that you could at least pay your respects.

Jaemin sniffs back and you can hear just how much he's holding back. "E-eight." The word alone gets Jaemin in a slump mode. He shuts his eyes tightly. "I'm such a terrible parent, she was in the house and I was with-" he stops himself sucking in a sharp breath.

"Jaemin." You gulp, feeling a different feel to when calling his name. As much as you hate being the middle woman, something about being present with him during that moment makes you feel thankful that you were with him. The fact that you know he's innocent makes you thankful. "You're innocent. You didn't do anything-"

"And because I didn't do anything she was killed. She tried to call for me, but I mistook it to be your moan." He gasps out. "I was in...the house when my...I should've listened to my gutt."

He grunts out and you can hear just how frustrated and gloomy he is at himself. "The reports said she was mute," you quietly add trying to understand what he meant by heard. Surely you would've heard, but she's...she was mute.

"She's deaf. Can't hear anything. Not mute. She's been trying to talk, while wearing hearing aids of course. But, she was still learning." Jaemin scratches the back of his neck shaking his head, the tears making an appearance yet again. "They think I killed her, but can you just imagine how scared she might've felt? Possibly trying to scream with her lungs without a clue how? Or even gasping for air while frantically trying to move her hands? She was scared...my baby, alone in her room, her father in the living room." He sniffs back maintaining a deep breath, cooling himself down. "And now her body is nowhere to be found. At first I thought she could be alive, but after seeing all that blood, her missing body and all these police, ambulance, detectives...you... I just.."

Jaemin slowly crumbles forcing his tears back. Your hand hesitantly lands on his back. Sucking in a cold breath you calmly move your hand along his back in a soothing manner. "We'll find her. I know it's not comforting but we'll find her for you. I'm sorry that this has happened."

"I just can't get out of my head how much she tried to do something. I even think she tried to call for help. Her blood shows how she struggled. There's a messy beeline from her bed to the hallway. It stops right by the bar of stairs." Jaemin runs his hands through his hair, looking into the air. "I swear I heard her voice, I know now that it was her. She tried to call me..."

You hum out quietly. "What does she call you?"

To that, he shuts his eyes tilting his head in agony. He whispers out. "She calls me Abahbah when wearing her hearing aid.. I heard it...she blabbed it out and I ignored it, thinking it was..."

The sounds that leave his lips are one of despair and disappointment.

"She hates wearing it, but she loves hearing my voice." Jaemin scoffs in pity. "If she was wearing her hearing aid, it would be such horrible sounds to hear. Her father moaning out and having the time of his life with someone who's not even his wife..."

All you can do is stand and listen, hearing your heart break every time he reveals a piece about his daughter. His daughter.

"I'm sorry to ask this," His head train to the beige wrist band again. "Can you stay?"

You don't know why that makes you feel relieved, however you feel warm inside knowing he needs...no...he wants you to stay. "Of course,"

"I mean you don't have to but-"

"I'll stay as long as I can," You tell him. "Do you need me to make you some tea? Something to drink?"

While being with him, you realize that it doesn't always have to be about you.

_

Getting back home that night, you can't fall asleep.

A part of you already knew that you'll most likely not fall asleep until this case is done. But now instead of dread, your head is driven to actually assisting the case in finding out what really happened. It kind of brings you back to you past self who was adamant and selfless.

Although Jaemin was in his feels and rambling out his thoughts, he assisted you with Intel to the case. And truly speaking when you entered back in the house, you got out your own camera to take the pictures of the child's blood line from her bed to the hallway. Such a pitiful sight to see. Her father and some random woman. The guilt washes away when you think of it as helping her to find out who took her body.

You want to believe that she's alive, but by the third day upon entering the office you know that her tiny 8 year old body that was in serious drainage of blood and lack of water, couldn't survive. Within three days, you visited Jaemin's wife, Chae and spent a lot of time with her. You learnt just how much Jaemin was a family man as well as well respected and loved because his friends and parents where at the hotel with Chae. They comforted and cried together with her. You helped around a bit with making tea and making sure you weren't sticking out like a sore thumb.

You only saw Jaemin briefly, he locked himself up in their room balling his eyes out and it's where you got to see his father and friends console him. He looked disheveled and so blue. His family were his support. You couldn't stay around the first day because you thought they should bond with their family. You ended up going back to work and working on the case there, where Jaehyun gave you some information of the neighbors and what they heard or possibly heard. Jaehyun also requested for a neighborhood footage, which he would get in a week's time.

You digged a little more deep into potential suspects. Outside of the family, Jaemin was a public figure and was well greatly admired for having managed and maintained a luxurious mansion hotel, Neo Hotels, with a rating of 7 out 10 in Korea. He was a young, aim driven businessman with a handful of competitors. None of which he was friends with, so with no personal interaction you believe that none of his competitors had anything against him aside from business. You go on to checking his close friends as well as Chae, those who were constantly around the family. And opt for interviews with the few. Surprisingly theirs a decrease of people Jaemin and Chae know and you're even more shocked when seeing Haechan as a part of friends that Jaemin knows. Sending him an email as well as a text message, your brain works in hyper mode. Could it have been his friends, someone he worked with or someone in the family?

The only family he stays with is his wife, Chae.

It was hard looking at her in the eye knowing fully well that you slept with her husband, but conversation was eased in when talking about her daughter; Na Daejun. Which you slowly learnt (around the second day) that Daejun was actually not her child but Jaemin's child...well his sisters child. His sister had been pregnant but was induced by a chronic illness which led to giving birth to her child prematurely and eventually taking her lasts breath before dying.

When you asked about the father of the child, Chae briefly mentioned that Jaemin's sister had been raped. With all the new information piling up on top of you, you can't help but feel even more depressed at the fact that Jaemin could be mourning over his sister again. Again, you've never had siblings of your own so you can't imagine what Jaemin is going through. Upon looking at Daejun's baby pictures, you instantly can tell how close Jaemin was to her.

Around the third day 6 out of the 7 friends you messaged agreed to have a chat interview with you. The fourth who rejected the interview was actually overseas, so you ruled him out. You ended up speaking to 6 people separately. Two cooperated and were ready to help with the investigation in anyway that they could, because they were torn and weren't even aware of the struggle their poor friend, Chae had gone through. Three of them, (Jaemin's friends) who you already met in the hotel when visiting Chae, where hands down literally doing their own digging without the investigators and we're of big help to you. They gave you news on where Daejun went to school, which parents didn't like her because of her hearing difficulties and how the teachers would favour her over their own kids- it's as though they were Daejun's big brothers.

The love they have for Jaemin is unfathomable and you're relieved with all the information you got, thanks to Jungwoo, Mark and Kun. You don't even want to suspect them because of how protective they were with her, however Mark stood out most to you because on that day he mentioned that Jaemin asked him if he could drop Daejun home from school. He said he stayed with her until Jaemin came home. Warning signs because according to Jaemin he never came home around he afternoon- only at night and night you were with him.

The last person you talk to is Haechan.

As much as it pissed you off to engage with your ex of more than 3 years, you are tongue tied seeing him. For some reason, for some odd reason the mere thoughts of: Why did he cheat on you? Surface in your brain.

The thoughts keep you from greeting him or even making eye contact with him. In a tense silence you both drink your cups of tea, because coffee is too strong. Not only do you pick up the cup simultaneously but you also take a sip equally before placing it down. You feel nothing from common similarity, however Haechan smiles at how old habits die hard. He tries to not pay mind to the silence, hoping that he'll get his chance to speak to you. After all it's been 3 years.

"I don't think you're of any use to me, or this case." Your sudden open-ended question comes out rigid and you bring out your mini notepad and pen to jot down his words (or give you a distraction) instead of thinking and looking at him. "So I'll make this quick."

His scoff emits the same palpable tension in the air. So much for hoping he could speak to you. You didn't change. Your name leaves his lips naturally, just like when he used to call you to come back to the present and away from work. You don't look at him. You don't give him the power to gaze into your eyes and make you feel like shit.

The day you broke up with him, seemed like the most easiest days of your life. However the crawling yearning belittling emotions in you weren't at ease. You were in constant reminder, by all the small things, that he left you for someone else.

You thought you were a good girlfriend, who gave him space and allowed him to do his job, who was present and attended to his needs...most of the time, but you had no argument that you were a stable girlfriend who didn't give him any headaches (unlike Jaemin who managed to swiftly get into your mind, Haechan was simply by chance why you still stayed with, so he should've felt honoured)- but then why would he do what he did?

Why did he do what he did?

You were physically attached to him, he gave you safety and the best comfort after each and every case. You were emotionally attached to him, especially when he'd listen to everything you had to say, in fact the communication was the strongest point and unit in your whole relationship-

"You're gone again."

Blinking several times you inhale and click on your pen writing scribbles on you paper pretending to write something important when nothing but the thoughts of him cloud up in your head.

"You haven't looked at me once since you walked i-"

It begins. His way of trying to apologize.

"I heard you're friends with Jaemin."

He rolls his eyes. "Can we please talk about us before we get into-"

"We can't talk about us, when there's a murder case that has to be closed. You know I don't work like that. My time is moving."

"Oh my god. Y/n. I really thought you changed." He shares his thoughts. "But you're still the same. Come on please,"

"I'm not off." You're distaste can be heard and you try not to look at him in disgust. You simply try to carry on with what you came here to do. "What do you think of Jaemin?"

You will not give him the privilege.

"I get that this is a case and you're questioning me-"

"How would you describe Jaemin during college, assuming you go way back?"

"-We'll talk for a moment about the case but can we just-"

"How come you're listed as his friend when you have minimum contact with him-"

"-hell Y/n, can we just tal-"

The constant back and forth and talking over each other creates such an imbalance that a few cafe seaters turn to look at you two, but you digress and continue asking all your questions - cutting him off just as he wants to speak. It goes on for a really long 2 minutes, the questions continuously pouring out of you, until he stops talking and sighs leaning back frustrated on his seat.

"Has he ever evoked suspicious details?"

His mouth twists in anger and he waits for you to look at him but you don't. "Y/n-"

Roughly you get up from your seat clicking your pen and shoving it back in your pocket. Not even looking at him, you take some steps away from the table, your back is turned and you walk away, while speaking up for him to hear. "Thank you Mr. Lee for your time and lack of answers. I'll cross you off the list now."

"It was you, wasn't it? The girl he slept with."

Dramatically that makes you pause for some seconds, before breathing in avoiding his eyes and continuing to leave.

"Or should I say it like him? Death in the seductive form of a lady with spectacular eyes,"

You ignore him getting your hand on the door.

Banging the table whilst scrapping his chair back as he sprints up- draws your attention forcing you to stop.

"C'mon Y/n don't leave again! For hell's sake just listen to me. Are you really going to be so wrapped up in your own head ignoring that you're just as guilty in this matter?"

You hesitate with your next step but brush it off continuing and getting closer to the door.

"Fine. You wanna be that way? Okay." Donghyuck grumbles, clearing his throat to prepare his next words. "You fucked him in his house while his kid was being murdered. Admit it-"

Your neck sprains from the heavy lifting words that spoil out of his mouth, as you glare at him. Your breath hitches in your throat.

"He thought you were an assistant to an assassin." Donghyuck seriously trudges. "Keeping him distracted while his kid was being murdered. Is this seriously what you've become? You leave me and go on to spreading your legs for-"

"Shut the fuck up!" You storm to the table with a befuddlement. "Have you fucking lost your mind? I didn't sleep with anyone-"

His eyes give light to an emotion of desperation, until you realize it's not desperation in his eyes but hurt. Oddly, you feel satisfied when you assume he's hurt that you slept with someone, but your emotions are crushed by his next words and the look of hurt shifts into mocking and belittling.

"I'm surprised you're trying to help him when all you care about is yourself." What he really means, is how on earth Jaemin got you so invested in him. Because the you he knows, would never not once put in everything for a person. You were selfish. "In fact, I'm willing to bet you don't even care about him. You're trying to save your ass. I can't blame you. You slept with him on the day his kid died-"

"I'm not trying to save myself-"

"He cleaned up and thought about you all night long. And here you are actually trying to save him. But you can't even take a minute to listen to me to try and understand-"

"Understand what? It's not about you!" You snap.

"It's not about you either! But still, till this day your head won't allow you to think about others. It's always you!"

"I'm so sick of this- just tell me where you heard what you heard and I'll fucking leave you alone. And stop speculating about me. I'm literally still in this case because he's innocent-"

He scoffs. "You know he's innocent because you slept with him. I bet you if you never did, you would've locked him up."

"You know what. I'm not here to play your stupid games and listen to you blabber." You point out. "I don't have time for this, or for you."

"That's why I slept with her." Haechan burns out, making your breath halt just a your eyes squint. "You never had any time for me. You kept me around as some form of item instead of a person. So now I'm finding it hard to believe that you're actually defending this man. Even besides the fact that you slept with him, you would've still locked him up. But you're still helping him? Why? You couldn't spare time for me to talk, but you initially stayed and spoke to Jaemin the whole night before going to fuck him."

Your tongue pokes your cheek. "You're even stressing on his behalf. But you never ever cared on my behalf. He's a good person and you used him. He's sex deprived, and like the being he is, he stroked off to you, balls deep and eyes shut in ecstasy as he thought about you. He didn't get to finish as his wife came back home with a tired gaze. She passed him and went straight for her room when she yelled out. He stopped thinking about you, got his hands out his sweats and attended to his wife only to be mortified at what he saw. What the fuck did you guys talk about that also has him thinking deeply about you? I used to think about you do much, hoping you'd think of me to. But you never did." A long pause rests in the air. Your eyes hollow and evident of your guilt as you hear him. His eyes gaze back into your eyes, there's a strong aura of overwhelming heat of guilt upon the room, mostly upon you, Haechan is just glad that he has you back and this time you're listening. "Am I still going to be scratched from the list?"

Glaring to the side, you catch pairs of eyes that quickly look away. Groaning out by your unprofessional manner you pull out your badge long enough for all the on lookers to grasp where you're from. No use getting random phone calls to the station of two people discussing a serious matter in bursts of anger.

You take a seat and fold your arms, your eyes on Haechan, firm and serious never blinking. He takes a seat too. You don't even speak, giving him the floor as he desperately wanted it. "Y/n I'm sorry for-"

You breathe out in heaps of anger.

"I know an apology isn't what you want to hear, especially from me," Haechan continues regardless of your eye roll and bouncing leg of anxiety.

"Haechan-"

"However it's what you're gonna get if you want the full story. I'm sorry Y/n. I really am." He voices out, trying to look sincere, but he looks more guilty then sincere. Not only was he nervous for actually talking back to you in the manner he did, but he felt bad for demanding your attention only to state his cheating ways again. So knowing that you won't listen to his one way apology (he knows you're only interested in Jaemin) he tries to play the victim card. "On that morning you caught me with that her, you didn't give me a chance to explain myself-"

"Oh please. As if what you did needed explanation." You roll your eyes.

Haechan sighs quietly and nods his head. "You're right. That night you had just called that you were gonna be working over time. Again. I was mad and angry that you stood me up, again. I was at the restaurant by myself. Looking like a fool while watching people come, eat and go. Should I say 'again'? Because really I've watched people arrive, eat and go in every restaurant all by myself because you never had time for me. In fact, not only in restaurants, but generally you never ever just sat down next to me asking me anything about myself, or how my day was. That night, I was beyond mad. I watched, I waited for you and all you could do was send a short text saying, sorry I'm tired. I worked overtime, I won't be home tonight, I'll be in the office. I'll never ever forget that night. I can say all the things I wanted from you that night, but it won't change anything now. It wasn't even the first time you had left me, so I got used to you not showing up when I needed you. Heck even the chef... The chef, she knew me specifically because you'd never show up and I'd always eat by myself...sometimes with her. But-"

"If you're trying to guilt trip me, then it's not going to work. You're the one who cheated." You point him sharply refraining yourself from getting worked up and angry. But you're already so heated. How dare he blame you for an action be did? Although you said his guilt trip wouldn't work on you, you admit that you were kind of unfair towards him in some ways. But you won't give him the satisfaction to know it actually wounded your ego, because despite everything, it still hurts being cheated on. "Don't forget it. Don't forget that you cheated. Not me."

"And that's why I understand why Jaemin did it. Why he fucked- no. Let me use his words." Haechan bites back on his lip while balling his fists. "Why he made love to you that night. I understand why, after years of cancelling his premium therapy membership, that he called me up just so he could talk about what had happened. He doesn't know that I know you, he doesn't even know that you know me, in fact I didn't even know that he was talking about you fully. He mentioned your name, but the words he said afterwards shocked me because I know you. The you that I know, only thinks of herself. You're selfish. Not selfless. All he knows is that he slept with someone who was not only purely satisfying and selfless. When he said that while saying your name, I was perplexed because that's not you. He's confused and mourning and the only person who can believe him is someone who he cheated with. That's you by the way."

You're attentive to his words, but feel so guilty just like him and you hate that he's putting you in his shoes and then putting you back in your own shoes.

"When I slept with the chef, it was to feel love. I know now that it was stupid of me to do that, but what assurance could I have gotten when every time I set up an appointment on your free day, you decided to work?" Haechan questions himself as if he's back to that day. "Same with Jaemin, his motive was simply because he needed to be fucked to forget. H-he's a man who's been sex deprived from his wife, who he's convinced is lying about her pregnancy. Honestly loyalty lasts long when everything's alright within the relationship. But the moment something snaps, you begin to wonder why you were loyal in the first place. And that's Jaemin, his motive for being with you was because his wife was dishonest somewhere and somehow. Unfortunately for Jaemin, the one time he chose to be disloyal... he happened to choose to be disloyal not knowing the aftermath. Unfortunately for you, you're entangled in this messy situation with him. Why did you sleep with him?"

Your lips are sealed. But your thoughts are bouncing off the wall. "You mentioned his premium therapy membership before he cancelled. How did you meet him?"

"We go way back since college because he was amongst my first clients. I'm his therapist. He ended his membership the moment his sister died. The night he found out about his daughter, he called me, on a private phone with a private line, and tried to explain everything that happened. Unfortunately that's all I know. He now calls me from time to time to ask for methods he can use to mourn peacefully while being under the watchful eyes of the police. I'm sharing this confidential information with you because we both know he's innocent. I'm sharing this with you, because if there's still a way for me to get back into your heart, the I'll glady take it. I've been-"

You roll your eyes coming close and cutting him off while muttering. "I don't care what you've been up to. Go fuck someone else until you forget me. It's been working for me, hopefully it'll work for you." You don't care if it's harsh, you don't care if you're being rude by walking out the cafe without another word. All you know is that he gave you all the information he knows.

Before leaving the store, you look back once, seeing him run his hands through his hair.

_

The next days are filled with you cramping up your brain with investigation. You barely sleep, looking at the case at every second to prove Jaemin's innocence. Being in Jaehyun's team, consisting of you, some other man known as Taeil (Jaehyun tasked him with the main focus to locate the body) and Jaehyun himself- you guys are task force 3, faced with dealing with the child and her location. While other units and forces are tasked heavily on finding the killer. However as you're trying to prove Jaemin's Innocence, from time to time you're cooperative with the other units in order to receive information.

Aside from that, your unit is pretty eccentric and busy all the time, even in ways that you've never been busy before, to the extent that even when you wash your dishes you only see the blood of the poor child.

With Jaemin being a primary suspect, and Mark being a secondary suspect, you're surprised that they both have alibis.

Haechan (despite you excluding and hiding everything he said) served as an alibi for Jaemin (as proven in the short text he sent you, that he'll keep his mouth shut if you needed him too. And you did). While Jaemin's wife Chae served as an alibi for Mark saying she was the one who was present and that Marked made a small innocent mistake by switching up the names.

Being in a meeting right now you're not expecting your phone to buzz. But it does causing you to react quickly. Ever since sending an email to meet up with Haechan, he's been using the email platform to engage into conversation with you.

Mr Lee Haechan:

Don't forget to drink water

Have a good day!

Aside from trying to work on the Jaemin case, your phone's been pretty scattered with emails from Haechan.

You:

Go fuck someone else until you forget about me.

Is what you told Haechan, and its still what you're telling him. Frankly speaking...

There's absolutely no reason to defend Jaemin, except your job being on the line, but aside from that, you free willingly put yourself in a dangerous mission to save him, especially when everyone is against him. Haechan's constant messaging got you to a deep pot of realization.

You'll never admit it to yourself, but consciously you know why you slept with him. And the person who helped you realize it, was non other than Haechan. You always knew why, you just could never admit it. While you were always busy for Haechan, for Jaemin you felt available. It's bizarre because you only spoke to him that night, but you were hooked onto him so strangely.

You wanna apologize to Haechan. But apologizing would mean giving him another chance. And you don't want that.

The break up, even before the cheating scandal, was already in motion. You loved Haechan for the person he was and always being ready to put you first, but, you hated how busy you were and how free he was. He just wanted to be with you, but you had to focus on your work and yourself. He's someone who's selfless and always puts others needs before his own, hence him always saying it's okay even when it's not. The outcome of being selfless is hurting alone inside and causing an unbalanced outburst of emotions. You both studied psychology, him for his work in therapy and you for insight on criminal behavior. You both know how an outburst of emotions can be deadly. In your case, and his case, it resorted to him cheating.

It's good to finally get the answer that you've been looking for of why he cheated on you, but it hurts knowing that your prediction of him not being happy in the relationship was true. You wish you could give him all your time, but you can't forsake yourself just to make him happy.

But now why is it different with Jaemin? In a way, he's almost similar to Haechan by being selfless. However why is it that you want to give him your time. You don't have to save yourself, you can lock him up just as all the evidence proven is already on him. Yet... You're trying to save your ass by helping him prove his innocence.

You know the answer, but you refuse to let it sink in.

So you're working, day and night to get him out your head and out your heart.

He's grieving and cares about nothing else. His world is falling apart, just like the way it was when he was in the bar making fun of all his problems (except for his wife which he refused to mention), only except this time, you want to be by his side. He doesn't deserve this. You're being selfless for him.

"Intern." You jump and blink upwards towards Jaehyun. "If I see you spacing out once more, you're off the case. I can't have you day dreaming every quarter of the day."

"Sorry."

Jaehyun stares at you, long enough for you to feel uncomfortable and change your seating position. "Pay attention. Taeil thinks he's got a lead. Taeil, you may continue."

Taeil, in his black jeans and buttoned down black shirt moves over to the white board which is adorned with all our findings and possible clues. "We've always thought that the body might've been carried out through the girl's window. But we spotted something yesterday." Taeil pins onto the board two images of grassland as well as road tracks. "Drops of blood."

You lean in your seat paying close attention. Any information is information for your ears, the D.A is already at your neck about locking up Jaemin and you can't let that happen.

"We found the blood on the doorstep of the backdoor and on the road in the back alley. Coincidence that it might've been for a stray or passer, we disagree because we tested the blood and it's a match to the girl." Taeil runs a hand through his hair. "Meaning, the body was carried, but it was wrapped in something sealed tight that only drops of blood could be let out. Right now, we've got 6 search dogs on different routes, searching for another possible droplet."

"Why not use the security camera on the block? Have you not yet received it?" You enquire.

"Honestly getting the fucker on cam and closing this case would be the best thing right now." Taeil turns his head in your direction. "The security camera footage has been stolen. My guess, the person who hid the body has the tape. We opted for a copy of the tape, they told us it's already been sent to the prospects. We ask Jaemin if he received any tape, he lyingly said no feigning crocodile tears. It's obvious that he has it and is lying. I'm strongly leaning on Jaemin."

"Not only that, he has barely been to his house. Something's off-putting about him, and he's starting to slip." Jaehyun inputs.

"Why not Chae?" You surprise yourself as well as Jaehyun and Taeil. But you roll on with the dice you threw. "They live in a hotel, a hotel that he owns. Jaemin hasn't been to his house in 4 good days and has spent it in his office grieving for his child. Meanwhile Chae is constantly on sight despite being pregnant. Why suspect Jaemin of stealing the tape when he hasn't been around, for all we know it could've been another detective. He's a simple man grieving now because he just lost his fucking child. I'm not trying to disrespect you or your words, but I think we should still keep our options open on who we think the suspect is."

"We can't keep the line open because it's goddamn self explanatory of who the killer is." Taeil rebuts. "Besides, that's not our department."

"It's not Jaemin-"

"Look if you wanna be a lawyer and prove his innocence you're in the wrong department-"

"You said you found droplets of blood on the backdoor exit and back alley, you asked for a tape and they claimed that they gave it to the prospects. I'm not complaining, my problem is why would he hide the tape?"

"Because he's the killer." Taeil deadpans, his head so wrapped around Jaemin being the killer.

"No. Listen to yourself. If he's the killer, you mean to tell me, he killed his child in her room, had a chance to escape the house and go wherever with the child and return back to the house, with no print? I strongly disagree. He said he was in the house all through out the night, even when the police were called, he was in the house. He never left the house-"

"I don't trust a word that guy says. His narrative kept changing whenever we asked him were he was."

"That doesn't mean you get to-"

"You weren't kidding when you said she's hell bent on taking his side." Taeil peers to Jaehyun tiredly cutting you off. "Why'd they pair her up with you? Listen here intern. We're not going to do things your way. When evidence is present we stay on it until we have the person confess or behind bars."

The rest of the discussion goes on with Taeil and you bickering about Jaemin's innocence before Jaehyun calls it progress getting us to end the meeting due to our endless back and forth comments.

"You argue like a kid. An illiterate kid might I add. All the facts are laid out in front of you, the defense attorney general is already filing up a lawsuit and you're still asking for more time on Mr Na Jaemin." Jaehyun rephrases out your whole situation in a nutshell. But everything is far from being in a nutshell. "Why? I'll keep asking this question until the end of this case, so get used to it. I'm really curious as to why you're pushing every moral you learnt in your years and months of training, for Mr Na. What did you see? Did you see something? What is it? Tell me, because I'm a second away from handcuffing him myself."

"Sir, please just give me, more time-"

"We don't have that time you're looking for. Other units have already closed in on Jaemin, his own family is already suspecting him and on top of that the faster we get him in and interrogate him, the faster we can find his child and where he hid her body."

You stand firm giving your best determination stare. "Sir. Give me just 3 days."

"3 fucking weeks have passed since we started this case. It's not looking good if we keep this open for a month, the prosecutors will take over the case and we'll be underneath their control. I don't work like that. We need to pack up and lock up now."

"Fine. Give me a day. Please." You beg.

Jaehyun folds his arms running his tongue against his lips. His eyes, hollow and deep, show how much he's neglected sleep for this case. If you think you've been working hard, then you certainly haven't seen how strained Jaehyun has worked and how easily he found all the clues to close in on Jaemin. However Jaehyun is no fool. With your compartment and the way you've been acting around the whole case, his active brain worked out that you may have had some kind of entanglement with Jaemin. It wasn't only him, Taeil questioned your motive on multiple occasions, however today he asked if you were Jaemin's lover of the past or else it made no sense why you defended him when all the ways were pointing to him.

Holding back his tongue from what he believes, he simply eyes you, and with the way you don't back down, your eyes pleading for some more time. Your eyes urge him to investigate you and Jaemin's relationship. It's why he nods his head when he says: "You've got the rest of this day and tomorrow. No more chances. Get going."

You don't have time to express your contentment when you're already picking up your phone and ordering a ride-

"Intern."

You stop by the elevator when Jaehyun calls you back. "Yes sir?"

"I'm locking him up tomorrow if you have nothing."

You thought that you'd be fueled up and eager to get moving, however once you get inside your ride and give the address of the hotel, you're drained, frustrated and overwhelmed. It's not fair. Jaemin is innocent. He didn't do anything, but surprisingly all the evidence has been pointing to him. The neighbors claim that they last saw him taking her to school in the morning as usual, the parents at school claimed that a male picked her up (most likely Mark) but the team of detectives are hell bent on making it all about Jaemin. His wife claims that she wasn't well and went to the clinic the whole day (she's got a doctor's note to prove it). However she claims that Jaemin took the child to the sleepover centre- to which Jaemin strongly denied but nobody listened to him. It's even worse when the sleepover centre mentions that the child hadn't come. So officers are leaning on the fact that Jaemin could've killed her since the afternoon and he hid her body and feigned ignorance.

The case runs all over your head when you enter the prestigious hotel, which has slightly been affected by the situation in which Jaemin is a main suspect. It's really alarming how the media gets it's sources and are always ready to twist and manipulate facts.

You walk past the guard giving him a tight smile as he knows who you are and opens up the door for you letting you pass. You're about to head on to their top leveled apartment until your eyes latch onto a familiar black leather jacket, black drenched hair and dispirited Jaemin making his way through. Your eyes narrow a bit when following his direction with your eyes. Your legs are no stranger to stalking as you walk up following him and where ever he's going. He enters through a door entitled staff only. You get your badge ready just in case you have to use it. Its not until you open up the door to an empty white lit corridor leading in one direction.

You carefully walk along the path until you spot some stairs that lead to an underground basement filled with (assumedly) residents cars. The parking area is darkly dim, with no sign of staff members to watch over the cars.

You freeze in your step, when your eyes catch a figure standing by a grey door. It's Jaemin. Your breath hitches in your throat when he leaves the door open and enters inside...

Your legs take in the invitation as you climb down the rest of the stairs passing by the parking set of expensive cars before following the passage way until you reach the door that's blending in with the wall. The door is already open, so you enter inside- with your eyes slightly straining from the brightness of the pure white light in the room- office....private parking?

The office is large, with a clear see though desk holding up a laptop and some documents. By the side of the office there's some frames of photo certificates of different deals. Jaemin's handsomely in some pictures shaking hands while at the same time, other photos are simply signed certificates. However, what throws you off the most is the sleeked back, navy blue, extravagantly catching the light by its posh outline.

Seeing as Jaemin is nowhere in the office, you most likely think he's in the car. And strangely enough he's inside the car, drinking from a whine glass sophisticatedly. Trying your luck, seeing as though he knew you where following him and wanted you to follow him, you pull open the door that's unlocked.

Not even hesitating, your leg steps inside the posh car and you comfortably situate yourself before closing the door.

Inside the car, there's light air conditioning, music swaying gracefully along the speakers softly and a carefree and unbothered male sitting on the driver's seat while drinking from his wine glass. Aside from the music playing, it's silent in the car as you listen to Jaemin adorn himself in the drink and the air condition leak out cool streams of air. Behind the gear stick, there's a little presentable set of a tray with the darling red whine bottle.

Jaemin leans towards your side opening up the compartment lid and taking out a wine glass with a handkerchief. Cleaning the glass and setting it down on the tray next to his empty glass, he begins to fill up the glasses and smoothly tilts a filled glass towards you.

Silently you take the glass from it's steam and chuckle, which delightfully gets him to smile despite the darkness underneath his eyes. Feeling like you're in the bar again, you take a small sip of your drink before turning your gaze to him. With flattery, you catch his attention when you speak.

"Wine," You smile, teasingly, imitating the way you first spoke when you were in the bar. "That isn't a drink to drink alone. Mind if I join?"

Jaemin's lips quivers revealing a little smile. He picks up on his own glass meeting yours half way as you both clink on it. He takes one big gulp, finishing the whole glass, while you take another sip, letting the flavour and the taste swirl around your taste buds. "So, what's the occasion? A fine lady like yourself shouldn't be in a place like this," He perfectly recalls your conversation, causing you to engage and pursue the way you did.

"I could say the same for you," you giggle, crossing your legs and leaning back on your seat. Just like when you were at the bar, he looks nervous and a bit hesitant. "It's not everyday, I come across a distressed man drowning wine instead of alcohol," You try to tone down a bit.

However, he sharply intakes a deep breath also leaning back on his seat. "What can I say," He surprisingly turns his head into your direction. Your breath hitches in your throat when his enduring dark brown eyes take in your being. He literally looks at you, causing the pits of your stomach to flutter. "I'm merely a god. I'm simply a man with problems, sitting next to a goddess with the most spectacular eyes,"

You nervously laugh, your inability to make eye contact for a long period dawns on you and you turn away. However Jaemin's eyes are still on you, analyzing your neck sinking and the coats on cheeks lightly changing colour.

That makes him smile, relaxed and free. Just like the first time he laid his eyes into your own enchanting soul. He sets his empty glass down on the tray, his fingers moving along his own while he constantly fumbles on deciding whether to continue drinking as planned or...draw into this conversation and see where it leads to.

You drink your drink avoiding eye contact, but your lips tugging upwards brightens your face. Jaemin's fingers itches to feel how warm your face is yet he refrains himself.

"How are you?" You ask, when noticing he's lost a bit of weight and a lot of his charming smile.

Jaemin blinks away the stars before focusing back on you.

"I heard you had a service of burial last week Saturday... without her body," You mention, your eyes finding his again. "It must've been hard."

Jaemin takes in a breath nodding his head, consciously aware of who you are now. A detective. Instead of answering you, he takes out his phone unlocking it and instantly seeing his little girl, Daejun's eyes.

You lean in when he brings his phone close to you, showing you a picture. In such a pretty beige dress with white hems, Jaemin crouches down beside her with his arms wrapped around her. Your eyes find his again (which are tenderly already on you) for a second before you both make it back to the pictures. He nudges his phone towards you and you take it in your hands, sliding to the next picture and next and next. There's even a picture and video were he's doing her hair. Jaemin's approximation with his child only mourns into your heart, as you think of your own parents and the day you were mourning over them.

Jaemin was an ideal father figure for the little girl. If you didn't know that it was his sisters child, you would seriously believe that it was his child. Then again, he took the child in as his own. He built a bond with her from the very beginning. You even tear up a bit when seeing that he had a picture of her at birth inside of the incubator breathing chamber for premature babies. You see Jaemin everywhere with little Daejun, she was his own daughter.

"My parents..." You sniff when releasing that it does hurt. "I never...they both died after giving birth to me. My mum in labour and my dad in a car accident while driving to the hospital." You smile tightly and shut your eyes afraid of letting the tears out. "She's...really lucky to have had a dad like you. I'm sorry for your loss,"

Jaemin's eyes are glued to the picture and he nods his head. "I'm sorry about your parents,"

"It's okay, I never really knew them," You hum out. "But, thank you. Honestly, you reminded me of my childhood. These pictures, brought back those times I spent at the orphanage home. And that day when I came by to your house, and spoke as though your child meant nothing, really reminded me that it's not easy to lose someone dear to your hear."

"Can I share something with you too?" He asks meekly. You give him your attention, allowing him to take refuge in your silence as he speaks. "I'm sorry for that night. That night I...asked you to sleep with me. I should've been fully honest that I was married and had a kid. Maybe if I was honest.."

You breath out and nod your head. "Are you blaming yourself again?"

Jaemin doesn't say anything, and when you look at him, he's deep in himself looking tired. "I should've been there." His tears are unintentional but when they're by the brim of his eyes and he blinks, your hand mindlessly cups his cheeks as your thumb wipe gently under his eye. Your hand goes underneath his other eye before landing back against his cheek. "If only I paid close attention to her that day, then I wouldn't have lost her..."

You have no words to say, no words of comfort, no words to shake off how useless he was feeling. You also felt like shit after finding out he had a child and a wife. Your hand does the talking, allowing him to cry as your touch brushes underneath his ear to massage his hair. Careful not to accidentally knock over the glasses, your other hand sets the glasses on the empty cupholder closer to your seat, and the wine bottle down and finally removing the tray placing it down. Fixing your position you allow yourself to lean close just to run your fingers into his hair and onto his scalp.

Jaemin's eyes blissfully close by the sensation your fingers bring and by the feeling you provide. He leans into your touch while leaning back on his seat, simply watching you. To think you were an orphan. It would make sense on your views and why you were sensitive. At the bar, you came with full intent to get laid, but when he started to speak to you and you considered a conversation, he noticed that you seemed hurt and afraid to open.

You both barely spoke about yourselves yet you seemed to understand and know each other just by the way your eyes were on each other.

"For the past couple of months, my wife and I were rocky with each other. Avoiding each other because of a misunderstanding and this growing dislike to one another. She was getting a bit too comfortable with going behind my back and making deals, and having this idea of sending Daejun overseas to finish her studies. I mean, it's not a bad idea, but Daejun's deaf and from the beginning I've been with her. Heck, I vowed to always be there for her," He sighs.

Staying quiet for a bit allowing himself to recall the days before this incident.

"I've always been there with her and for her. I didn't like the idea of her being far at such a young age. I mean, was it wrong for me to want to be close to her until maybe the day she graduated? I just wanted to protect her and be with her, teach her things, learn with her, watch her grow, see her smile, care for her, comfort her, help her whenever she needed me...I just wanted to be there for her. Its all I want.." Jaemin's eyes lower. "It's all I wanted,"

"After stating that I didn't agree, that I didn't want to let her go, Chae got so furious." Jaemin continues. "She signed Daejun for aftercare and day-care services, and registering her to live at a dormitory home for mute and deaf kids. Anything concerning Daejun, Chae would take it upon herself to make final decisions without my consent."

You frown, whilst still patting his head. "How come?"

"I don't know. And whenever I ask, she'd tell me Daejun went for sleepover at her friends place. Only to find out that Daejun had been going to aftercare after school and straight to the dormitory. I cancelled that immediately, only to find out that Chae, as my wife, opted that all matters concerning Daejun should be informed only to her because I, as Daejun's father was too busy. She changed it all," Jaemin shakes his head slowly. "I thought they had a good relationship, but when Daejun asked me to start taking her to school, because she didn't want to be around Chae, I understood that Chae really did a number on her. I spoke to Chae, and that's where the arguments began. It got to the point where I wanted to leave with Daejun. Chae got too controlling of Daejun, or rather just trying to get Daejun out the house. So I warned her that I'd leave her if she kept doing what she was doing." Jaemin scoffs.

As a middle person, you have no right to enter into their relationship problems. But as a detective, this is all news to your ears. However, right now, as he himself is confiding in you, you gradually engage with him. "So why didn't you leave her?" You feel 'botchy' for asking that kind of question, however the gears in your head are turning. Leaving Chae or resolving the matter back then, could've probably not led up to this.

Not to say you were suspecting Chae, but...Chae's pursuit to get rid of Daejun has kind of worked. Except Daejun's dead.

"She told me that I can't leave because she's got a child." Jaemin answers."

"Her pregnancy right now?" You ask. Recalling Haechan's words and how he said Jaemin thinks she's faking it, or that she's not really pregnant- you can't remember it well, but Haechan's words come to mind.

"I couldn't leave her, because I had to take responsibility for what I did. That's until I found out." Although he looks indifferent to Chae's distaste for Daejun, you notice his face changes when talking about Chae's pregnancy. He looks almost disappointed and ashamed. "Stillborn."

Your eyes widen by his words. Making your busy thoughts halt. Stillborn? Chae's baby. Chae has a stillborn baby? The baby...is dead?

"There's a doctor's report somewhere in the house." Jaemin shuts his eyes, and you can only imagine that he's pouring in anguish as his jaw trembles and tongue pokes his cheek. "On that same day that Daejun disappeared Prior. Early in the morning. After dropping Daejun. After Chae went to the hospital. I found the report and read it. I tried to confront her about it... But...the thought of saying it out loud. That my first actual child was sitting dead in that womb. That my first unborn child was no longer living. That maybe, because of the stress in the house, I caused Chae to lose our child. A child which I hadn't even laid eyes on...my child was dead. The responsibility that I stayed for, was no longer there. I couldn't... I don't know why you she didn't tell me. Why she kept carrying it while knowing that it was dead? On the other hand, she kept trying to push Daejun out the house, as if it was Daejun's fault.... I know it's stupid to think that. But the fact that my child had died months ago, and she kept making life harder for my little gem filled me with frustration, pain, but most of all regret. For so many things. I don't even remember where I went. I was limbo. All I know is that I was tired. The thought of leaving her crossed my mind, but after finding out about my stillborn baby... I just wanted to comfort her until she would be okay. I even thought staying with her, along with Daejun would make up for her loss...our loss. I wanna say that, we did that to the baby, but in me deep down I keep blaming myself. I remember just trying to get rid of everything I was feeling. But on that day, I don't even remember my thoughts. They were too much. I... Chae's been keeping secrets from me, acting strange with Daejun- now that I think of it, Daejun would ask...would sign to me, if Chae was angry with her. I was... To be vague, sleeping with you made me wonder why I put up with her in the first place. Why I let myself be trapped and lost in this predicament?"

He stayed with her because of her new growing baby in her womb. But that morning he found out that the baby was actually dead. It set him off character. It's on that same night he went out to the bar and slept with another woman...with you.

Your brain begins to work in detective mode. While your ears are sincerely open to everything he saye, your mind was piecing pieces together. This could be the key to his innocence. It makes sense why he never spoke up during his confession statement. He was in and out of it that he didn't want to hurt Chae, nor let his mind wander to the drastic and sudden present reality. Not to mention he slept with you and you showed up as a detective.

"You know...I had a sister... Daejun's mother- I didn't sleep with my sister if that's what you're thinking. My sister passed away, and left Daejun behind. But before that, when she was still alive, she really wanted to make sure that her child would be in good hands just in case she'd go. Of course she trusted me, however she believed that a mother would know best. A woman with a good heart, who'd look after her child. At the time, I was betrothed to Chae since childhood and assumed she wouldn't mind looking after Daejun with me if my sister had to pass." Jaemin's somber eyes reveal such a deep emotion of sadness that it makes you- literally- want to embrace him until everything would be okay.

"Jaemin, no. Please don't do this to yourself." You plead, running your hand gently across his cheek, using your thumb to caress his skin. "It's not your fault," You whisper out, maintaining a firm, and strongly positive attitude. "It's not anybody's fault of why this happened. Don't blame yourself please. You know, somethings in life, need to happen for a bigger picture to be revealed. For a brighter future, for joy and peace to come. I... I don't have the answers, but I'm speaking from experience. Things happen for a reason. We can't see it now, but I'm certain that they'll eventually make sense and make the pain go away. It felt really good being with you that night, but I felt like complete shit after sleeping with you knowing you were married. Yet, I don't know how or why, but after that day and continuously investing myself in this case, a lot of things that were unclear in my life became clear again. And I'm not saying this to disregard that Daejun was being brutally hurt while we were together, but I'm saying that... you don't have to blame yourself. The pain of losing Daejun will never go away as you're her father, but I want you to simply picture her in a good light. You gave her a lot of security and assurance that you were always there for her. You were her abahbah, and she loved you so much so that you shared a special bond, despite not being her real dad- she considered you so much. And from everything I've seen when being with you, you care a lot for everyone around you. You genuinely take responsibility with determination and you put your all into everything. I promise you, one day, it'll make sense. Just don't blame yourself please."

Jaemin nods his head smiling meekly at you. You smile back, still running your fingers over his scalp.

"Would you..." Jaemin breathes out. "I mean, if Daejun were still alive...I'm not asking anything weird, but...would you look after her?"

The sudden question shocks you out of your train thought and you have to bring your thoughts back to the present conversation. "Honestly, when I was growing up in the orphanage and would go to school seeing all these parents loving their children and buying all sorts of gifts and snakes and toys, there was nothing more I wanted them being adopted by two loving people who wouldn't mind giving me the world." You smile at your child thought coming to light. "Sadly I was never adopted. But I was filled with the urge to comfort families who lost their kids. And sadly, yet again, I feel like I had lost my main motive for why I wanted to be a detective when it became all about forgetting my ex and just getting this job, that I didn't care as much about the families and who they lost. As long as it kept me busy, then I didn't care. But, in regards to your question and this case. I adjusted my character a lot, I mean...you've even got me fighting for your innocence with the passion I had before. So, I'm not saying I would, but if D-Daejun felt comfortable with me, I think I'd be comfortable with her too. But I can't really say that, it's been a real struggle to allow myself to be selfless. But for you... I think I'd try."

Jaemin's warm hand circles around your wrist and by the contact of his soft hand on your skin, you bite the inside of your cheek with anticipation. Although his eyes gaze deeply into yours, his lips travel along the insides of your palm, just as he intertwines your fingers together. His lips slide from your palm to your wrist before he turns your hand around planting light kisses on your backhand. His eyes shut as he gatherers both his hands to engulf your own planting little kisses, yet meekly playing with your fingers. He doesn't open his eyes, but his lips move. "I never even thought about that. If Daejun would be comfortable... I think she would've been comfortable with you. And besides, when we met at the bar, you were very much selfless when paying attention to me sincerely. When finding out that she... disappeared, I lost hope in leaving Chae. Leaving her will pin me out to be the real culprit. But you need to believe me,"

His eyes open, peering into yours, hopefully and faithfully. The stars that twinkled on that night you together, are shining brightly in his eyes again right now. Your eyes latch onto his hidden lips as he continues to kiss your hand, before he stops for a second and says your name. Your stomach twirls inside and you can't help but suck in a breath, especially when his long lashes pane upwards filling you up with his soul.

"No matter what they say," He shakes his head whispering. "I didn't kill her,"

"I know,"

And just like the last time, your hand that's securely in his manages to get back on his face just as he draws near and you both meet half way in crashing your lips against each other. It's like a magnetic force keeping you in bound within his reach, your hand that's on his face gets tangled within the depths of his hair, just as his soft hands grasp onto your face while his other hand moves down your side lifting you up.

From your seat your leg eagerly shifts when you plant them on either side of him sitting up on his lap. Your lips gasp out when his mouth departs from yours and straight to your neck. His mouth leaving open kisses just as his hands roam around your back, down to your butt. Mumbling between your neck he asks: "You have no idea how much I missed you. Do you want me to make you feel good?"

Jaemin watched as you climbed on top of his lap, and his brain was just so deeply filled with the idea that he wanted you. You hum out in response, but it's muffled by your moan when his lips suck on your neck again bringing your body down. Your hand taps above, turning on the lights in the car.

"God, | missed you so much," he whispers in your ear again, trailing kisses down your neck. “Gonna make you feel so good."

"Jaemin, please,” you whimper at his words. You truly missed him too, missed this. You missed everything about him. Just by the touch of his fingers, that weren't too fast neither too slow in discarding your clothes, piece by piece, while still maintaining a perfectly steamy kiss as he takes your breath away. You let him remove your clothes, your tongue focused on his own as you fight for dominance- which he's clearly winning. Your blazer, your pullover, he unbottons your shirt sliding them off your shoulders moaning out when feeling your hot skin.

You pull your tight vest, as well as your sports bra over your head once, your boobs falling out and Jaemin instantly catching them mounting his lips on them and making it a mission to please both of them.

While you moan out by his kisses, his charming laugh while fanboying over your boobs and tongue action only edge you to unbotton your jeans as quick as possible. He laughs and stops your hands. "You're in such a hurry let me do it." He chuckles lovely again, shifting his reclining chair smoothly back until it hits the back seat before he makes the seat alignment slanted to make him laying down easier.

Meanwhile your hands slide underneath his white shirt, getting over his chest and slightly squeezing his man nipples. You smile when he bites his lip emitting a low groan. "You like that?" You smirk.

You laugh at his meek behavior and holding his shoulders down to the lowered seat, you grind your hips on his hard growing member. Dry humping him exactly like a dog in heat. The car is filled with sounds of ecstasy, with Jaemin groaning out as you moaning out when feeling his bulge pulsating underneath you. His hands finding your boobs and squeezing them and spreading his hands over them bringing them together, minding how soft they are, how perky your nipples are, how warm they are and how he can feel your heart beat while squeezing.

"Rock paper scissors for who gets to start," his needy eyes looking into your own, just as he bucks his hips upwards his hands leaving your boobs by gripping your hips continuing his motion. He bucks his hips up roughly again. He presses you harder into him while he moves his hips up trying to reach his high.

"Jaemin I just want you now,"

"| know baby, | know, it'll be faster if you play rock." He positions his fist forward and you roll your eyes playfully doing the same thing. The motion of his hips stop with him panting out, however you continue circling your hands over the hard materials trying to feel him.

"Rock paper scissors!" You play a rock as instructed and he plays a scissor.

"Yes!" You cheer, while fumbling with your pants again, going back to your seat to remove and kick off your trousers remaining in your black laced thong. Similar to Jaemin who unfastens his belt and brings down his pants and boxers leaving them at his knees. Your eyes marvel when his hard rocking cock shoots up and slaps his abdomen. "So hard," you coo biting your lip.

He lets out a low curse when you climb on top of him again, your clit already moist over your thong as you slide over his dick instead of allowing it inside you. "Are you really teasing me with your wet pussy? Tease." he grunts yet looking pleased to the extreme. "Shit." You hold onto his shoulders slippery grinding your hips back and forth on his shaft that's still over his stomach. Your wetness only lubricating over his. "Fuck," he holds onto your hips following your movement and the way your hips roll.

You throw your head back as your hands are placed over your boobs, fumbling and folding and feeling the warmth and softness. Jaemin's back gets off the lowered seat going up to kiss your lips as his hands drift to your ass. "Up," you let out in between the tongue deep kiss.

Jaemin grips your ass holding you up while you move your panties to the side and slid onto him. You both moan out even with your lips sealed together. Your muffled moans continue as you push yourself all the way down till you met his hood.

"Shit." Jaemin moans out when you push him back down the seat having your way. The windows of the car already giving the foggy appearance. Jaemin proudly let's out his grunts watching as you bounced up and down, your boobs bouncing in his face making him flustered.

You laugh placing your hand on the roof of the car at Jaemin's red face when he places a hand over to cover. Your walls clench around him, and he bit his lip. You lean forward moving his hand gripping his jaw making him look at you. "I love your face looking like this," you moan, as Jaemin tries to maintain contact but when you begin to suck and kiss on his neck he loses it. His hands grip your ass hard as he holds you in place making you go faster, thrashing you up and down over his rock hard cock.

You stop kissing his neck to cry out in ecstasy when his hips begin to play into action while smashing you furiously and with such unknown speed. Your bodies colliding together as your eyes tightly shut feeling his thrusts going deeper and deeper. You moan out as you and Jaemin both cum at the same time falling on the seat with you on top of him. You can feel his liquids in you swimming together with your own wetness, you both don't move. You keep yourself deeper feeling the pulsating of his cock and you roll your eyes back riding out your high by moving on his dick back and forth. To hush your moans you kiss him, passionately. You feel Jaemin continue to fill you up completely and his breathing matching yours as you pant out heavily.

"My turn," Jaemin simply says and with one hand he presses you onto his body as his other hand slides down your spine to your hips, lifting you off his shaft. Gathering your wetness with his fingers, he slowly slips his digits inside of you making you squeal by his three fingers. He works his fingers in you, dying by that quenching sound and your heat closing up on him. Making that beautiful curl motion with his fingers that you love so much. He starts hitting your spot just as his thumb rubs evenly fast over your bud- making you immediately shake.

"Jaemin," you cryingly moan out in pleasure, your fluids getting louder and louder as your eyes struggle to remain open. He laughs deeply at your shaking legs, his hand on you back sliding down to grip your ass. You groan, already sickeningly close to another orgasm. "Jaemin," you whine, rocking against his fingers with fervor and need. You gasp trying to lift yourself up, only for his large hand to find your back again placing you down over to chest. As he places you down again, you can feel his throbbing cock give warmth over your body. Feeling yourself flutter around Jaemin's fingers, you arch your back outwards and gasp as you harshly cum again, and your legs and butt lift up by themselves still shaking. Jaemin's fingers continue to work, but now with two fingers. He rides them into your sensitive swollen pussy and you ride his fingers in the air through your high- your eyes animatedly rolled back. You fall back on Jaemin's chest panting out in ecstasy when your thong is slapped back into pussy

This is pussy drunk.

Jaemin adjusts his position to be on top of you, as you lay back on the lowered seat. He frees one of his legs from his pants, as he goes down on his knee ready to taste you. His kisses start at your lowered stomach making your moan as he goes lower and lower.

His wet, cold hair slightly touching your ribs making you shiver at the sudden contact. He places kisses to your inner thighs, glancing up at you from time to time to make sure you're alright.

"Are you still strong?"

"Jaemin just give it to me," you whimper at his words. You truly missed this. You missed everything about him. How he made you feel. Jaemin kisses your wet clit, pulling your thong aside and slowly adding his tongue to the mix, lapping at your pussy, his tongue spelling out his name on your heat, before sucking and deeply inserting his tongue. When you hips shake again, Jaemin holds onto your rising legs and gets on top of you.

He leans into your ear moaning out. "I wanna feel you in me, but slowly."

He wastes no time in diving inside you with his risen dick pulling sweet moans out of your throat. He takes his time with you, going from just the tip gripping in and out of you to fucking you slowly and passionate while leaving wet kisses all over your neck. When your moans grow louder and your hips start thrusting back, he knows you're close. He really just wanted to enjoy you with a free mind. He picks up his pace, going faster now, his own orgasm approaching. His thrusts practically getting animalistic not a sense of empathy or corcern for your wellbeing- however contradicting being there as he kisses your forehead eery once in a while, running his hand over your sweaty damp hair. You loved him really, really loved it, you craved him more than you did the sex but this love making is even better with him.

Your muscles are tight, your legs were shaking erratically and you don't know if there's tears of pleasure falling out your eyes. Whatever it is, you know that you never wanna leave him and that you always want to be there with him.

"I'm cl-close-" your words get cut off by your moans. He grabs your waist with one hand, moving with the same passion. His other hand moves to rub at your clit, slow, tight circles. He buries his face in your neck as his own moans and groans grow louder and finally-

"Ahhhh!" You both cum again, looking straight into each others eyes taking in the look of pure pleasure combined with a heavy thirst for each other. Your lips find their place again when you both suck deeply feeling your body moulded together. He was definitely made for you. And you hate that his got a wife. But you can't help it when your hands go around his neck allowing him to be embraced into you as you savor this moment. You're even awestruck when he whispers into your ear: "Your mine."

His cock slips almost completely out of your pussy before it sinks back in the girth, having you feeling like you are being stuffed full even though it's just the tip. Your puffy pussy wraps around his cock like warm, wet, and tight glove. And he can't get enough of it trying to maintain his breathing. You feel so good around him, he's never felt like this before when having sex. Your body aligns with him so perfect that he just wants you in him forever.

"I would selfishly ask you to stay for tonight," Harsh breaths leave his lips as he groans. "I need you all night long.. but you have to go to work, right?"

You sigh, but it turns into arousal when he speeds up his movements earning a pathetic pornographic moan from your mumbling lips. "Jaemin," You pout. "Your dick is too big, I can feel it in my chest,"

"Chest?" He laughs lightly looking all over your face. "Is that so?" He whispers going out again and full loading in again causing your back to arch into his, making him chuckle.

"Mmhm.."

He grunts, loving your expression and eyes that tenderly gaze at him. "But you love it, yeah? You love me don't you?"

Instead of answering him, your hands go from his hair to being placed underneath his neck. You look into his eyes, straight into his brown wanders and smile. You don't answer and neither does he expect an answer because you both dive in to feel each other's lips again. To feel the warmth of his own tongue against yours. Pulling away, your eyes take him in. Strands of his black hair stuck to his sweaty forehead. "I love you," you moan out when he thrusts in you. "I love the way you fuck my pussy, Na Jaemin. Meeting you is the best thing that's ever happened to me,"

"I love you too," He kisses your neck hiding his smile. "I love the way your pussy and body takes me in." Maybe it's a hidden rule to never say the big three words during sex, but right now during the heat of the moment you both feel something that's undescribable- and the only way to describe it, is simply love. You both can't resist the dawning attraction that you both get into another session of slow yet long strokes of nasty yet passionate car sex.

Breathlessly while riding him from the back and allowing him to roam his hands on your ass, you thrust yourself inside of him while twirling your hips and rounding him with speed. You moan out aloud while holding onto the steering wheel gasping for air when he takes over in pumping inside of a you a few long strokes before releasing. In sheer ecstasy you throw your head back as you both combine your voice to let out your vocals of pleasure.

Your eyes are drawn to a little red light flickering on and of. It's a dashboard camera. You smile and turn to him just as he slaps your ass. He chuckles looking flustered and fucked out of his mind. "You've got yourself a sex tape,"

"Sex tape?" You point to the camera and a look of recognition crosses his face. "I should probably remove that. Probably would need to replace the memory card," he chuckles a little. "Come on," Getting off his shaft and sneaking next to him, your lips attach themselves onto each other again. You both can't get enough of each other, desperately needing him close to you.

Both losing track of time, you stare into each other's eyes with admiration taking in your boldness and fierce approval of each other. You're pleasing to his eyes and he's perfect for you. A smile grows on your lips and you rest your head on his.

You stay with him in the car, as he wraps his black leather jacket around yours shoulders, while you wrap your own blazer over his and your waist allowing sleep to consume the both of you. And for the first time in a long while, you feel like you can actually sleep and take rest.

Useless.

Because thirty minutes later, you're awakened by your ringing phone. With your leg draped over Jaemin and his arm securely around yours you can't help but wish this case was already over.

Cleaning up with the hand wipes he has in his car, you dress up quickly leaving him still rested in the car smiling and looking peaceful when you kiss him in departing. Your lips not having enough of him, and neither he having enough of you when he tries to get you to stay again.

Patting your wet hair down as you tie it in a low bun, you make your way outside the car and out the office. There's an off smell that you smell, but you brush it off thinking it's the congested air from within the car. Walking out the dark parking lot and up the stairs getting back to the main lobby, you're stunned and stopped in place when seeing Chae by the elevator.

Upon seeing you, she smiles sadly and waves you over. Shit. You whisper to yourself getting in the elevator with her.

"I didn't know you were coming,"

"Oh," You nervously adjust your blazer, feeling as though she's got x-ray vision and can spot Jaemin's hands on your body. You smile looking away from her. "Wanted to check on you actually. Uhm... I had questions I wanted to ask, but if you're busy-"

"No, I'm available. I just went for a walk with Mark,"

You nod your head purposely avoiding her eyes until you can get the guilt out your system. When the elevator stops and you both walk out the lift going over to the apartment door. You wonder whether you should question her based off of what Jaemin revealed to you about her, or if you should just go with the flow of your initial reason of stepping in.

Entering into the apartment, your eyes take in the massive amount of space when there are no people. There's already set furniture, all matching with the cleanliness of the space. The curtains are open revealing the beautiful pent view of the sunset and the city outline. You move forward in the apartment looking outside. "It's crazy how we still haven't found her e body,"

Chae who's in the kitchen boiling some water looks through the open kitchen view to you standing by the floor to top ceiling window. She remains silent and continues preparing the tea. Once she's finished, she walks over with the tray of tea and sets it down on the table taking a seat on the long white couch looking at you.

"Tea?"

Turning your head away from the cyberspace city and all the lights coming on, you politely join her on the couch. "Thanks,"

"Have you seen Jaemin since?"

Trying not to be panicked you breath in and nod your head. "Here and there." You quickly drink on your tea avoiding eye contact.

Chae however scoffs and shakes her head. "It must be nice being an officer. You get to see him. Meanwhile I haven't seen him since the burial. I don't know what's going on with us anymore. He's avoiding me,"

You stop pretending to drink, looking down at her hands over her pregnant stomach. Stillborn. You remember Jaemin saying. "He must be grieving,"

She huffs and leans back. "Grieving? I think he wants to leave me."

You gulp tightening your lip. "That's a heavy accusation."

"But it's true," Chae sadly says breathing out. "Even before his daughter to go missing, we were starting to get rocky. I don't know, but I keep getting the feeling he knows," You drink on your tea trying not to speak but urging her to speak, peeking in her direction seeing her looking at her stomach circling it slowly with a saddened face. "Marriage. A fucking tool to create babies and a legacy. I wanted my own kids, but he already had her, that little deaf girl. Wasn't even his. I thought he wanted kids, since he loved her so much. So I wanted to give him a child, so that he could be happy. But... We weren't having any time together because of her. I slept with Mark."

You completely halt in your thoughts when she says her last phrase. Your head blank when looking at her. Suddenly the guilt weighs off your shoulders, the guilt of making Jaemin cheat on his wife. It doesn't mean what you did is good, if anything it shows how really marriage is a tool to keep couples together and imbalances happen when women like you invade a home, or even worse, when women inside a marriage seek help outside in order to fix and adjust a problem in their marriage. Sleeping in the marriage and making it bitter, is what you can kind of feel has happened to Jaemin and Chae.

Him already having a child. And Chae simply wanting her husband to focus on her, instead of the outsider.

She shakes her head. "And even that went wrong. I'm supposed to be due next month, but....my baby's dead. And I feel so fucking sad." She sniffs. "I don't know how to look at Mark and tell him his baby is dead, and I don't know how to look to Jaemin and tell him what I've done and that the baby I had for him has passed."

"Chae," You set your tea down gently and open your arms allowing her to lay her head on you.

"Is it so wrong that I just wanted him to love me? I tried everything to get her into another good home, or to study abroad and even get means to make her independent and an individualist, but Jaemin refused all that and just wanted to watch over her. For crying out loud, he married me. Did he just wants to use me? If he can love a child that's not his in that way, then he can most certainly love a child that's not his. Right?" She questions. "Getting into marriage I thought I'd be able to cope looking after his sisters child, but I couldn't. He just used me, he didn't really need me or love me. Only that deaf girl. I didn't even mean to sleep with Mark. It was by accident. But when I was knocked up and saw Jaemin attach himself deeper to the girl and wanting to leave me, I told him that I had his child."

The fact that Chae, herself is opening up sends you into therapy mode. At the end of the day, she's still a person who's lost her child. She ended up telling you that the baby is dead inside here womb and that she slept with Mark - in other words the baby wasn't even for Jaemin.. making it saddening that he cried for a baby that wasn't even his and feeling guilty over a baby that wasn't his.

"I think he already knew a long time ago that I cheated on him. Otherwise he wouldn't have brought an unknown lady into our house and fucked her while his daughter was being killed." She sniffs again.

Your hands freeze completely. How does she know that? It freaks you out, how you're the unknown lady and so far Haechan and surprisingly Chae know the details of what Jaemin was doing that night. You don't think she knows it's you. "He brought an unknown lady while his daughter was being killed?"

Chae nods her head again. "I saw it with my own two eyes."

"Wait Chae. You're not making sense." You try to piece her words together. "You were home while he was fucking another lady?"

At that, Chae tenses up. Did she just accidently tell you that she was home?

"So that means you knew that Jaemin wasn't the killer. You could've backed him up with your statement." You say being shocked. "Wait, did you just say while his daughter was being killed you saw him fucking another lady? That means it's either you saw the killer and did nothing or..."

"You've got it all wrong Detective." Chae gets off your arms and shakes her head. "I was at Mark's house-"

"No you-"

You hear the apartment door make a beeping sound before he opens up like a chamber door revealing Jaemin. His hair messy and eyes hallow and empty when looking at Chae until his ers move over to you. You're still too stunned at Chae's comment but take in his appearance with flustered cheeks, considering that you both consciously fucked each other raw in the car a while ago.

"Jaemin you're home," You're expecting him to ignore Chae, the way she claimed that he would, but he moves closer to the wall with his hands in his leather pocket looking down at her and talking to her. Your heart filled with guilt again. You slept with a married man again. Even if he's not happy in his relationship, you still feel so bad. Chae seems to really want his attention in her life. Your phone rings and you snap out of your shock.

You get up answering the call seeing it's Taeil's contact. "What?"

"We've got the neighborhood surveillance cameras. I've been trying to get a hold of you-"

"I'm on my way."

You cut the call not wanting to let your thoughts fly by. Just as you're about to go, you spot Jaemin in the kitchen and Chae nervously squeezing her hands standing next to the door. It's either she's hiding something from you, or Jaemin, or she's nervous about something deeper. "Uhm do you have to go? Jaemin....wanted to-"

"Have you eaten Detective?" Jaemin's raspy voice gets your attention to divert back to him- as well as Chae who turns to face him in shock. Jaemin looks up to you when removing his black leather jacket, his tongue flickering down to moist his lips. "I could make you something before you go," If Chae was shocked before, then right now she's trying to maintain her agitation. She looks angry.

"I haven't eaten, but I really have to go," You sympathetically say walking slowly. But instead of walking towards the door where Chae is, you stop within Jaemin's direction. "Thanks for your offer,"

It's not tension that lingers in the air when you both look into each others eyes. The longing need to go, suddenly moved away from your mind as you peer at him. It's silently pleasing to gaze into his eyes and have him attentively minding you, especially when he says. "Can you stay a while?" His voice dangerously low forgetting that Chae is still in the room.

A temptation crawls over you to kiss his lips again, and you know he feels it too when his eyes plead and beg for you the same way he did when he was expressing himself. Your lips open up, but Chae beats you to it bitterly. "What do you mean can she stay? She has to work." The ulterior anger in her voice can be heard. "Right."

That wasn't even a question, it was her basically opening up the door for you to leave. You're not even surprised when she grudgingly holds the door open for you. Taking one last look at Jaemin, you walk out towards the door only for it to be slammed once you're out. She's furious and is gonna take it out on Jaemin.. Perhaps.

Not even a few steps forward- the yelling that you predicted happens. Chae yelling at Jaemin. "Just tell me the fucking truth! You fucked her! It's her right? You fucked her right?; Fucking talk you asshole! She smells like you, even the way she looks at you tells me everything I need to know- that you fucked her! Don't touch me! Don't even- You offered to cook for her? You- you-" Her voice turns into a struggle whimper and angered roar and just like that, you hear such a loud smack which jolts you to jerk on forward and start moving when you hear their house door open. You hide behind a wall hearing the footsteps quicken. It's Chae running down the steps while pulling on her jacket and adjusting her bag.

Unconsciously you find yourself carefully walking back to their apartment -only for you to collide into Jaemin in shock.

He's rubbing his cheek, yet upon seeing you he pulls his hand away slowly and simply smiles. He's tired. His eyes weigh heavily on the eye bags, but you can see he's trying to be brief. First his daughter disappeared while he was sleeping with you and now his wife losing her mind because of you. You're in such a hot seat and guilt and shame, however when you open your lips, it's like not even an ounce of regret passed through you.

"Is it okay, if I can take you up on your offer again?" You briefly smile.

His eyes, although tired, light up and he nods his head. He looks around calmly and opens the door widely for you to enter. "Make yourself comfortable," he says.

"Make myself comfortable?" You smirk and turn to him. "You don't need me to help you in the kitchen,"

"It's okay, I wanna make you something to eat, as well as myself. I'm a good cook." He politely shakes his head smiling at you. His hand nuzzles your cheek and chin- pinching it slightly letting out a little laugh. "Besides, it's been a while since I've eaten too,"

Your eyes widen. "You haven't eaten?" It makes sense why you saw that he also lost some weight. "Even when mourning you need to eat," you tell him softly.

He sharply takes in a breath looking away for a second before resting his hands back in his pocket. "Yeah, that's why I want you to eat with me. Chae's gone out. Uhm. Y..you can stay...if you want..." He rubs the back of his neck.

You smile decently removing your blazer and walking towards the long couch again.

"Uh, I just wanted to go and get the wine in the car. Please don't go, I promise I'll be right back." He mentions warmly and clears his throat before going out.

Smiling at the door even when closed, in your heart you feel content and happy that this is where you're supposed to be. With him. You take in the view of the city again by the large window and smile to yourself.

Why you're smiling and fantasizing about Jaemin- is beyond your control. But you do know that within these few hours of being together elevated you soul.

You just have to be able to prove him innocent before hopefully starting out anything with you.

You stand and look around the house simply waiting for Jaemin and sending a haste text message to Taeil that you'll only be coming in tomorrow. For now, you just want a break. And standing while day dreaming about a man who's not even yours, yet, seems to give you the relaxation you need.

You sigh out when wondering why he's taking so long. You decide to go after him hoping to help him if he needs help. After closing the apartment door and using the lift to go down, you're unaware of Chae using the stairs to go back up to the apartment.

To her surprise instead of seeing Jaemin, she sees your black jacket and pounds every room door open trying to 'catch' you and Jaemin in the act. Meanwhile you find your way through the secret hall pass and finally in the underground/parking hidden office space.

Luckily you find Jaemin.

You smile when entering the office seeing him close the back door holding onto a full bottle of wine. His face is a bit twisted as if in disgust, but smiles when seeing you. "Hey," he says and moves to you with the wine bottle. "Uh, I'm sorry for taking time. There's just a weird smell itching my nose,"

You recall smelling the odd smell before you left and nod your head. "I smelt it too when leaving. Do you often use this car? Do you take it for car washes?" You ask as you move towards the desk with the wine bottle and begin opening it with a twister. Placing the red wine within the two glasses already set.

Jaemin who's already opening up all the doors of the car hums out. "I use to take it for a wash every 3 days, although I haven't been, or rather I don't use this car as much anymore." He mentions looking puzzled and disgusted again.

"It's a sign you should take it for a wash," You smile and drink on the wine. He opens up the boot and you sadly sigh. "I'm sorry that things aren't going your way,"

"It's alright. I've been a bit-"

You pick up his wine glass and navigate yourself to him, whose behind the car. You're confused when he suddenly stops talking and remains frozen with his hands still on the lid of the hood. "What, you found the source?"

You go behind the car but instantly get hit by a wave of a wreaking air. You cough out covering your nose and shaking your head. "Oh my god," You try not to breath through your mouth by the foul sewerage air.

Standing next to him, your face is scrunched up and morphed in similar actions as him. There's a black duffle bag and Jaemin grunts.

"Is that your gym b-"

You freeze for a second when he opens up the black duffle bag seeing a black plastic. Just as much as you're confused, you quickly panic and jump back when Jaemin curses a loud and falls backwards cursing out repeatedly. "Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-no-no-no-no-please-no-please-please-please-say it's not real-fuck-no-"

Jaemin erupts hysterically in tears. Your eyes move from his crying botched agonizing face to the duffle bag and plastic wondering what could possibly-

.

No.

Your hand quickly drops the glass as you dash to the boot and rip open the plastic suffocating within the wreaking dead rotting air of his child. "No.." you tremble seeing a bloodied head with patches of wet dark hair sticking against the plastic. Your eyes are brimming tears and you can't even see when Jaemin crawls back and with shaking hands terrifyingly holds onto the head - wailing out in sheer agonizing torture.

Yu're shocked out of your mind when you see the rotting corpse of the little girl. Jaemin begins crying and you stumble back by the stench. Your trembling hands reach for your pocket and you pull out your phone hearing it ring. You can't even hear the caller as you stutter out in distress. "We found the body. We found the body. Please- come quick-" you cry out trembling dropping the phone immediately running to Jaemin when he gets up and ravages the plastic and duffle bag open. He places his head on the bloodied chest trying to hear a heartbeat but you scamper him away. Trying to compose yourself at the gruesome sight of the both of you covered in blood- the blood of Jaemin's daughter.

"Jaemin don't touch the body, Jaemin don't-"

Jaemin can't even hear you as he drops to the ground screeching out in weasels of trauma pain. He attempts to lunge at the body again claiming that she could be alive- but already the sight and clear evidence of her dead body shakes you up. You end up handcuffing Jaemin with your safety cuffs telling him not to move.

In a blur you maintain your balance or you try to maintain your balance as you rush out the door and run out the office to the outside. Not only are the people stunned and avoiding your bloody and tear stained state but they rush on and begin dialing for any sort of help when you call out for help.

A few minutes seem to pass with sirens trailing and tailing on each other. Jaehyun and the rest of the detective forces are on full command and control when bashing in and following you as you lead them to the scene. Jaemin's wails can be heard - when entering the office you're shocked again in pain when you see Jaemin's body on the floor cradling the dead body which is still half in the duffle bag, but instead of it being in the car it's now on the floor within the gap of Jaemin's cuffed hands.

Soon enough the hotel, parking lot and secret office is flooded with police and an ambulance and the whole crew.

In your weary and distorted state you see Jaemin being taken away from the body and is brought to his feet- and for some reason, while in holding, his wife, Chae in tears is outraged and slaps him.

"I didn't do it-" you can hear Jaemin say before he's dragged away by the officers.

•

It's an ongoing nightmare in your head. From the terrible scene to the muffled voices of anger, to Jaemin's face and his eyes starring at you pleading telling you that he didn't do it.

A week has passed. Thankfully you were frantically frantic as before. But you sit idle in your seat with your whole trembling body wondering what to do.

The security footage of the neighborhood indeed reveals a black vehicle pulling up- but instead of the front yard, the car is on another street behind the house. It's impressive how the footage was taken, as it clearly shows someone carrying that big duffle bag across a street and a car suddenly appearing and both the person and the duffle bag disappear in the car as it speeds away. What's more crazy, is that the same footage also captured another car pulling up but instead at the front yard at the same time. However only one person leaves.

You know for certain, that one person leaving is you. As you called on an Uber late at night after you refused to stay with Jaemin. Later on, by foot- a person is seen treading slowly to the house. The person identified as Chae.

With all that information and footage, you'd think the detectives would try to rationalize everything.

No.

They put Jaemin behind bars, saying he orchestrated the whole thing and what's worse is that he had hitmans who helped him. It sat well with everybody except you.

You spoke to Jaehyun repeatedly trying to tell him that they've got it all wrong. You could tell he was irritated by you, but you also could tell that he felt something wasn't right. You pressed on the matter even going as far as claiming yet again that Chae mentioned he was in the house with a hooker. Excluding that you were the hooker.

To no avail, it's been 9 full days that Jaemin was locked up and awaiting his trial which would be in a months time after the detectives, DA and court settled down and placed all the information together.

Another reason you sit idle on your work chair trembling, is because you took the dash bored memory card from Jaemin's car without permission from the investigation team and have been hiding it. Reason being, because yet again as you're caught in the camera making love with Jaemin, if reversed and rewinded back a couple of weeks it shows the culprits of the little girl's killer... You still don't know what happened, but you have proof that Jaemin is innocent. Which is why as you walk to Jaehyun's office with both USB and memory stick of the club footage as well as the car dash memory card, you know that justice will be served for Jaemin's innocence.

"Intern. You're getting on my last nerve." Jaehyun grumbles out. He gets back to typing ignoring you. You don't mind him as you set both the stick and memory card on top of his table with a written report of the whole case. "What's this?" He looks at the report file reading the title page with a confused look. He groans and leans back on his seat. "We've already closed the case and sent it off to the DA. You've been positioned as an official member and Detective Writer of our police force. Why is it that you can't let this case fucking go?" He complains but you cut him off.

"Because I was involved sir." You blink your eyes, breathing out and maintaining an emotionless face. Your try to stay still hoping your tears won't fall by your selfless act. You train your eyes on the clock instead of his heavy eyes. "An innocent man is in jail. And even though it'll cost me my job and dignity, I'm prepared to risk it all. In the account and accord that he's innocent and set free." You gulp when removing your new shiny official badge and placing it on the table next to the evidences. "The proof is all there."

You bow your head and walk out his office. Instead of going back to your desk you find yourself going to the department canteen. You wanted to go to the police station to see him...to see Jaemin. But the guilt of letting him rot inside especially since you knew that he was innocent was killing you.

So as you idle sit on one of the lounge chairs staring into the abyss of your mind, your thoughts begin to wonder.

You're seated for what seems to be like the whole day with the sun setting and you having not moved from your position. You're broken out of your trance when your phone rings. As usual it's Haechan. Your moral support in letting you know that you shouldn't be pining on yourself. This time, you ignore his call and sigh out heading back to the office.

You're met by Taeil who stops you with a disappointed look as well as paper. "Just to let you know what it's about, you're suspended. Jaehyun's waiting for you in his office."

You don't know what Taeil thinks of you or what he knows. You don't even care what he thinks of you.

You've been an intern detective writer for more over 9 months now, but now you're an official Detective Writer....or rather you were. You were extremely prideful in the work you do. Being able to 'have eyes at the back of your head' or being known as 'sharp’ is an esteemed word and/or phrase that your higher executives prefer to use when they were describing you. Maybe you're selfish and tend to be heavily guarded, and perhaps even self centered, however- as you've been on this case, your moral values and center core routes have returned. Even though, you're not so sure what your hidden and secrecy actions will let your executives and higher-ups call you, but one thing you do know is that you've earned an honesty medal. As you see everything and nothing gets past you, you're surprised how you let a man slip right through your rib cage and straight into your soul.

The first thing you hear when entering Jaehyun's office is your high erratic moan. You feel embarrassed and you shrink back in embarrassment. When Jaehyun pauses the video and glares at you, you know you're done for.

In your head you're hoping for the story to end. That Jaemin is released. His wife is cuffed and the truth is all out. But it's not that easy.

Jaehyun pauses the video and looks up to you. "You were among the top 10 interns to have found favour in the executives eyes. By default, I assumed you slept with him, as you're the only female intern. I was proven wrong when seeing your work ethic and drive. All the values and morals that we as detectives have, you embodied them. Working with you, I was astound as well as amazed by your surging drive to prove us all wrong. Now I'm not quite sure whether your drive to work was for the right reasons. I'm honestly disappointed in you." Jaehyun mentions and you don't know why, but your pride sinks. Thinking back to how you started this case with conviction that truly you were going to get into his good book. But now you've disappointed him. *I've heard so many good critics about you. And working with you, my judgement based off of you was wrong, you are not only a hard worker but you pay close attention to detail. Which brings me to this evidence. Taking this new evidence to the directors and DA will tarnish your reputation, ruin your resume and deem you untrustworthy, it'll evict you from working in any other force team again. However, not taking it, allows for the man behind bars to be sentenced for a crime he didn't commit. I'm conflicted in between two options. The first, suspending you and closing off this case myself with the right person behind bars, and the second, allowing you to redeem yourself and prove yourself to me again by getting another form of evidence, a verbal confession preferably from Mrs Na herself."

Hearing his words and hearing that perhaps you have a chance you're baffled by his generosity. Leaning into faith and his words you stand slightly straight. "How would I get a verbal confession?"

He turns to his compute screen and types some things on his keyboard before turning the screen to me, while pressing play on a layer footage. It's the car footage.

Your eyes widen when you see Mark's face in the dark. He waits alone and a second later theirs a knock on the door. Mark rolls down the window and you can hear a brief: "Can you open the boot?"

Mark is quick in pressing a button. He turns his head back before smiling as the door opens and someone gets in the car. Removing the black hood over the head- your eyes widen when seeing Chae.

She looks nervous and is evidently shaking while gasping and trying to catch her breath. "Mark please drive."

"But Jaemin-"

"Drive!"

"Yeah sure," he looks uncertain and puzzled. He turns his head around facing the road before starting the car and driving. "You okay Chae?"

Chae is shaking and holding tightly onto the black jersey she's wearing nodding her head. "Yes I'm fine. You're going back to the office right?"

"Uh," Mark looks ahead for a second. "Yes. Jaemin sent me a text to pick him up from home-"

"I have his phone. It was me. He's occupied right now." Her lips tremble. "Mark I did something terrible." She breaks into sudden tears and cries out. "Mark-"

Mark looking panicked he pulls over the car and attends to Chae hugging her. "Hey," he softly calls patting her head. "It's going to be okay,"

"Mark, it's not," She trembles and continues crying. "I didn't mean to do it. She wanted her dad and started crying and he suddenly came home and- and just came in and she- she wanted to see him- Mark I hit her- I didn't mean to- to- he came home with another woman and - and- she started crying and I hit her- Mark- Mark-"

"Don't worry Chae. Chae calm down, please calm down. Crying and stressing isn't good for the baby," Mark informs and tenderly wipes on her tears looking into her eyes. His hands move in her hair and he brings her close placing a kiss on her forehead. Before looking at her. "Let's first get this car back in the office and then we can talk,"

"Okay," Chae still has worry in her eyes but complies with Mark.

He returns to driving the car with one hand and assume the other hand is one her hand or thigh. They eventually go along in silence. Jaehyun stops the video. "From here on, they're quiet. I assume they spoke outside of the car. I don't know what she told Mark, and I don't know what Mark knows. In the car, she was a bit tongue tied and a mess, so her words aren't clear enough for them to be pinned. All I know is that she said she hit her and that he, being Jaemin, brought in another woman, that being you. With that said, she never enters in the car again. The next encounter in the car, is of you and him. From the likeness of your conversation Chae's baby is still born, her and Jaemin have been rocky, she didn't have a good connection with the little girl, and most importantly she wasn't at the hospital the whole day. If you're willing, I want you to get a confession out of her. I'm sure it won't be easy, but it's all I have as an idea. It's either that or your pride. I'm willing to let this slide off because it looks like an honest mistake. You sleeping with him was probably meant to be a one night stand. Considering you slept with him again, knowing what you know is beyond me, however that's not my business nor does it involve me. I didn't appreciate your dishonesty or hiding the bar footage, but I appreciate your courage in speaking up, even if it's at the very end." He stands up with a file in hand. "I'm sure riling her up about her cheating husband will egg her into cracking and confessing. And upon watching the car footage, his wife and Mark seemed to have a really strong bond. He seemed the least suspicious. But if he could hide and cover up for Chae, how much more is he hiding. Would you be up for it?"

You don't think Jaehyun has any other alternative motives other then wanting to get Chae to confess. You don't think it's because he wants to help you. "Yes." As long as you were keeping your job and he was allowing you to continue the case, you didn't care.

Right when he lets you leave his office, you go to your contacts book and find yourself dialing up Mark as well as Chae opting for them to come in to give their last closing statements. You prepare yourself by thinking of what questions to ask, you think deeply of triggering questions for both Mark and Chae.

Considering that Mark doesn't know that he was the one who impregnated Chae you think of how to bring it into the equation.

°

Mark is seated in the interrogation room seemingly calmly. You doubt he knows what Chae has done, but based off what Jaehyun said about him being close with Chae, you still have to make sure. Besides, if he knew that Chae was the killer (assuming she's the killer), why would he go on to helping the investigation.

Jaehyun looks through the one way glass mirror watching Mark, he sits down and hits the recording recorder tape. He nods in your direction and you walk in.

"Hi," You smile, causing him to look up and sitting up in his seat looking welcoming with his big eager eyes.

"Hey,"

"Thank you for coming in on such short notice. Uh, I'm not gonna take up much of your time, I just need one last sentence from you."

"No problem," He nods his head before clearing his throat and leans in. "I actually wanted to come to the station myself,"

"Really?" You question tilting your head a little. "What for?"

He shakes his head leaning back on his seat folding his arms. "It doesn't add up or make any sense that Jaemin murdered Daejun. He loved her with all his heart more than anything else in this world. I'm finding it really hard to believe that he would do that. Look, I may have lied in the beginning of the case,"

You nod your head allowing yourself to look open, making it calming for him to speak. He removes the beanie on his head, and presses his hands together cracking his knuckles. "If it's possible, I would really need you to be honest."

"Yeah, yeah." He nods his head. "Uhm, first of. I'm the one who dropped Daejun home from school that day..." He sighs out. "I really didn't do anything to her. According to the school she was feeling sick and Jaemin sent me a text to get her. I did as told and stayed with her, making sure she ate and was warm. I covered her and wrapped her in a blanket. In the report, I said, I waited till Jaemin came home but I lied. I waited till Chae came home. She came back from the doctors office. That's what I wanted to be honest about, and also.... This was late at night, but I picked up Chae from her house. Please don't think it's her or me, or even Jaemin." He sighs and scratches his head. "I really wish I knew who did it."

"You said you picked up Chae late at night,"

"Yeah," Mark briefly nods his head. "Uhm, she was crying a lot. Uhm." He sighs. "Look man, it's not my place but apparently he was home with another woman. That's why I'm certain that....okay, I don't know but he was with another woman and Chae wanted to go anywhere but home."

You nod your head, feeling thrilled that the words are rolling out his mouth. "You picked her up with what?" You open up your file pulling out a print out. "When looking at the neighborhood footage, we were unable to capture who brought Chae home because their were trucks and trucks of movers. A new person was entering the neighborhood so lots of people where moving in and out and the trucks blocked the view of the house. So I want to ask, what car you drove?"

"I remember that, uh. Picking up Daejun from school, I walked with her until home. And picking up Chae at night, I drove with Jaemin's company car. Uhm, if it helps, I don't think Jaemin had his phone with him. Chae had it, seems like he forgot it since morning. So accordingly she's the one who sent messages, using his phone."

Your heart elevates in joy by Mark freely confessing. He's words edge you on and are back up for the case. "Thank you Mark for your honesty. We'll keep this in the record. Uhm, you said you drove with Jaemin's company car. How did you have possession to it?"

"I drive Jaemin around sometimes. So I've got a spare key."

"On what occasions do you drive him around?"

"Business meetings or say maybe he wants to go to the club, or he's tired. It's a job but I don't mind helping out, it's the least I can do,"

"Hm, interesting." It's not an opening, but you slide in your question. "Why do you do it? Out of gratitude or because you're guilty of something?"

He visibly looks stunned. "What?" He mumbles.

"I'm not implying anything bad, I'm just asking. You're helping out him, Chae and even Daejun as a friend or..."

He blinks his eyes and shifts in his seat. "As a friend of course,"

"As a friend?" You question while nodding your head. "It's just you said that it the least you could do. And I'm wondering, why you said that. Is their something you did that you feel guilty of- I'm not including Daejun here but, maybe your wronged Jaemin and want to make up for it...or you possibly had a misunderstanding with Chae or-" he looks uncomfortable when you mention Chae and he looks down squeezing his hands together.

"As a friend." He states out.

"Why did you pick up Chae late at night?"

He scratches his head. "Uhm. Like I said, she messaged me using Jaemin's phone. And she saw Jaemin with another woman-"

"No, no, I get the part. But why call you with Jaemin's phone. At first, we were suspicious of you because of his call records but we dropped you when Chae came to your defense. So I'm wondering, why did Chae defend you...why she holds you in high regards, especially since you're more of Jaemin's friend then her. I'm not implying anything malicious. But, I had a chat with her....about her baby. Unfortunately, the baby is stillborn." You gulp sadly when Mark halts and looks up quickly with big eyes. "She's known for months now, but she's been finding it hard to open up. I'm not sure if she's planning to give birth to it being still or not, but I'm worried that she might not get the chance to speak to you."

"T...to me?" Mark's lip trembles and he closes his eyes looking saddened. His hands run down his hair and he sniffs. "It's mine...right?" He whispers. "My baby,"

You stay quiet, feeling sad. You empathize with him in the sense of him being a middle man. "Mark..."

He sniffs again, slowly picking up his head and wiping his eyes. "So is that what you wanted a statement for? What do you wanna know? That I slept with my best friend's wife and knocked he up? Or that I took her to my place to forget about him while he fucked some other woman?" He heavily pants out, seemingly struggling to hold in his emotions. "Fuck. Are you sure it's mine? That I....I'm responsible?"

"That's something Chae can answer." You say quietly surprised that he took her to his place. You're even surprised that he admits to sleeping with her. "As for what I want to know, I want to know your relationship with her?" You say out in a soft tone, hoping to not evoke anger.

But he's not angry. He's disheartened and looks broken. "It was a mistake okay. She... I... Look," he sits forward. "I slept with her once. We both agreed to never talking about it again. By that time, things with her and Jaemin were getting rough. I don't now what was going on, but I didn't like seeing he upset. So I just started helping out. Or rather, trying to get Jaemin and her to avoid each other. She was pregnant and I didn't want her to stress. I didn't even know...that it was mine. I just wanted her to be...." He looks down and sighs out rubbing his face.

You feel bad for Mark, so getting the information you needed, plus the additional information he let out, you thank him. Jaehyun calmly leads him to the canteen telling him to drink and eat something or even rest a bit. You follow behind Jaehyun waiting to hear his verdict.

Before you can head on back Jaehyun sees Chae entering the canteen. "Wait, there's Chae," he points out. "Come."

"Mrs Na." Jaehyun starts and goes on to shaking her hand. She has a soft smile before her eyes see you.

"Hi Chae," You nervously greet, seeing her smile disappear.

"Hi." She stiffly smiles. "I got your message. What statement did you want to get from me?"

"Uh, if you could just follow us to the interrogation office-"

"I wanted to buy some milk before we can start." She cuts off. You look to Jaehyun and he nods his head.

"Oh, ohkay." Judging from her tone, you're reminded of when she yelled and slapped Jaemin for wanting you to stay. She's probably onto you. You step back yet jump a little when you bump into someone. Mark. He holds onto Chae's arm and looks in between his eyes.

"Mr Lee, I think it's best you to rest up for now." Jaehyun speaks up yet backs down when seeing the strong eyes Mark has towards Chae. On instinct, he gets out his phone setting the voice record on.

"Mark?" Chae's tone softens. "What are you doing here?"

Mark turns to you and looks back to Chae. "Can I please talk to her for a minute?"

"Of course yeah," You nod your head, but Jaehyun nudges you shoulder. You don't know why, but looking down at your watch and thinking of whether Mark wants to let her know what he told you so that she can perhaps lie to you- is what goes on in your mind and it's what you think Jaehyun stopped you for. You can't let them talk. "But can it be after? I won't take up her ti-"

Mark doesn't even wait for you to finish before turning back to Chae and speaking up. "Was it mine?"

Your eyes enlarge not only by him talking over and ignoring you, but by his question. Chae's equally stunned and confused. "Yours?"

"The baby." Mark starts looking down at her bloated stomach. "Was it mine?"

"Was?" She questions, her chest rising and falling. "What do you mean was?" Her eyes watering. "I don't know what you're talking about-"

"Chae tell me right now. Tell me the truth. Is this the reason why Jaemin's been upset with you?" He lets go of her while stepping back, but she quickly holds onto both his arms.

"Mark no-"

"Chae," his eyes water a little yet hers are pouring already. "I told you to leave him. I told you that you shouldn't stress yourself. I said come with me- Chae I care for you more than he does! Chae why did you stay with him- now look what you've done!" Mark bursts out, the tears running down his eyes. "My baby....our baby....our baby's dead-"

"Mark please don't stay that! He's still alive! He's still alive! He's not dead!" Chae frantically pulls on his clothes crying out. "Please-" she cries. "I'm sorry-"

"Chae why did you stay with him? I told you I could look after you, Chae..." He whispers and wipes his eyes moving back and away from Chae's hands that try to reach to him. "What did you do that night?" Mark ends up asking. "While he was fucking that woman, what did you do?"

Chae's trembling and hiccuping still crying. "I didn't do- I called you Mark- please Mark, please help me- it was an accident- I swear I didn't mean it-"

Mark steps back running his hands through his hair. His jaw clinches as the tears fall out. "You left my place to go back home- so you had nothing to do with Daejun's disappearance right?"

"Mark-" She chokes out. "Please don't do this-"

"Chae-" his voice trembles. "I told you leave him. I begged you to leave him- but you... You didn't touch Daejun right?"

Chae's hyperventilating at this point, the tears falling onto her clothes. Sh clutches her stomach and shakes her head. "She was hitting me-" She whispers. "She was hitting my baby-" She struggles to breathe but continues. "Mark I didn't mean to- Jaemin came in with that lady and Daejun was-" she stops herself and cries on. "Daejun was screaming- Mark please-"

"Fucking tell me the truth Chae!" Mark shakes his head and pants out. "Jaemin was preoccupied with the woman to notice you- what did you do? While he fucked that woman on your couch- Goddamn Chae don't tell me you laid your hands on Daejun- don't tell me you took out your frustration on-"

"I hit her okay!" Chae bursts out and shakes her head taking two heated steps forward grabbing Mark's shirt. "It was his fault! He made me do it! Mark that bitch was moaning out my husband's name! So I hit his precious daughter!"

She pushes Mark back with full furry and rage. You try to intervene but Jaehyun holds you back.

"And then she started crying and I threw her on the bed telling her to shut up- but she fucking wouldn't shut up! He was going to leave me! He was going to leave me if he saw that I hit her, so I covered her face with a pillow." Chae gasps out and moves back looking down at her hands. "But that stupid brat, hit me. She punched my stomach and I.....I didn't mean to hurt her, but I took her clock and hit her with it through the pillow. But she kept trying to escape and she kept hitting me and my baby- Mark-"

Chae bends down holding her stomach.

"Mark she was the one who killed my baby and tried to make a run for it- I couldn't let her tell on me and I couldn't let her get away with killing my baby- and then I saw the blood- I don't know if it was from me...my baby... I snapped. I threw the clock at the back of her head and she fell. She was about to scream again but I covered her mouth and took her back to the room. Mark- I.... I didn't mean it ...and there was a stupid bitch moaning out my husband's name. He didn't even care- he fucked that lady and I got so angry. I don't know what came over me when I grabbed the clock and kept hitting D-D-Daejun over the head.. I just wanted her to be quiet,"

Jaehyun stops the recording by the end of Chae's frantic crying. Mark draws closer to her on the floor and he gently wraps his arms around her, as she bursts out crying while holding onto him tightly.. Your heart aches for Daejun... the little girl who was caught up in the whole mess and drama.

"Mrs Na Chae," Jaehyun gets out his handcuffs, not even minding the couple that's securely holding onto each other. "You are arrested for the murder and missing case of the persons of Na Daejun. Anything you say this point on will be used against you. You have no right to a lawyer, and you are to remain silent within the next hour."

.

7 months later..

The days following after Chae's arrest were frightening. You had never seen a court case as such. Aside from the palpable tension between Jaemin, Chae and Mark, you found yourself in a sticky situation when Jaemin had to come clean and admit to what he did in the house that night. He briefly laced out that he was in an unfaithful entanglement with another woman- and while he said that, at some point in the court room Chae screeched in anger pointing at you with pure hatred blaming you for pushing her to the limit.

You don't really know if Chae knows you to be the woman Jaemin slept with, all you know is that she suspects you a lot for having an affair with her husband.

Speaking of husband, as soon as the court case was settled and Chae was sentenced on the account of first degree murder 8 to 10 years- Jaemin decided to put quits to their relationship with a divorce following.

You haven't known Jaemin for long, but within the weeks of the trial, you hardly saw him with an expression on his face. He was extemly quiet with this repeated gloomy face stuck on loop. Not only was it heart breaking seeing him that way, but you couldn't help it when comforting him. All you did was give him a comforting hug.

A hug which you thought would rekindle your 'love' to him again. But instead you got a little head nod after you asked if he was okay, and that was it.

You never saw Na Jaemin again.

His business suffered collateral damages. His public image of the perfect man was ruined because of the cheating scandal as well as false publicity of him bribing the judges to get away with killing his own daughter.

According to reports, even though he had lost quite a number of ratings (due to the events of the past), he continued to run his business for some months before shutting it down altogether because of the lingering discomfort he had in running a business after knowing that a child, his child, had died and was prematurely buried in his own hotel. After closing down his hotel and removing his license, you honestly thought he would find his way to you...

Foolish.

You have no words to describe the whole incident, but when Jaemin paid you no mind after the court case, you felt incredibly stupid for falling in love with him.

You could only say it is what is is. While you humbly thrived and diligently worked in your new role and position, you constantly got reminded of Jaemin whenever you'd go to the club with your colleagues, or when you'd sit in Haechan's passenger seat being reminded of your hot steamy make out with Jaemin in his car, or even the simplicity of looking at kids with their fathers. You wanted a relationship with Jaemin.

You wanted him, needed him, so desperately that you stopped going clubbing and got yourself a rebound in Haechan. You thought you could forget Jaemin, if you kissed, touched, fucked somebody else. Unfortunately, you were engraved with into Jaemin so much that nothing and nobody else came close or even compared to him.

Nothing compares to the way he made you feel by your touch deprived self. You'd secretly touch yourself behind Haechan's back at the thought of Jaemin and his skilled tongue eating you out, you'd moan out whenever Haechan kissed you because in your head you only thought of Jaemin. You only saw Jaemin. A soft hand touch, an unexpected hug, warm handshakes where you could feel Haechan's entire hand in yours, the texture of his skin- everything Haechan did, you only allowed your mind to see Jaemin in everything.

You wondered how your life would be with Jaemin. Unfortunately, your Na Jaemin was Lee Donghyuck.

That's why you're not too sure if you're imagining things.

You're out with Haechan on your monthly date night at a beach side restaurant sitting outside facing each other... and you see him.

You feel like you're losing your mind.

Haechan sits across from you talking about logistics or something along those lines, looking at passionate as ever that he doesn't even mind if you pay attention or not.

You really don't know if you're going crazy or not..or if you're imagining it.

But there's a man, in a black long sleeved shirt, with jet black styled hair, sitting all alone looking lavish and mysterious, drinking what looks like red wine...with his gaze on you from time to time.

The eye gaze where you feel as though the nerves in your face that go down your spine and chest are attracted toward his gaze. He's sitting two meters away from you, yet there's such a strong hold he has on you, that your legs cross over each other to slightly squeeze your needy core. The intimacy of... Eye contact. Smirks across a crowded room. Raised eyebrows. Knowing glances. Witty banter.

You gulp and try to focus on Haechan and his deviating topic but your mind wanders onto how you cannot kiss him but you really wish you could.

"Are you listening?" Haechan snaps you out of your dazed eyes and you hum nodding your head. From the corner of your eyes, you see Jaemin smirk.

For some reason, you can already tell that tonight you won't be leaving this restaurant with Lee Donghyuck as Na Jaemin, but that you will leave the restaurant with Na Jaemin being in between your legs. With the way he's looking at you, and the way your needy eyes plead with him, there's no way this won't be another 'secret' locked up in a room.

As you're about to leave, you tell Haechan that you'll meet him by the car.

You pay the finest attention to smallest details when you're touch deprived; such as someone's shoulder brushing against yours, someone starring at you too long or even your own hand brushing against your clit at night when you're by yourself. That's why walking towards Jaemin table, you know what you want and this time you're going to do it the right way.

You just hope this time that there's no dead body around.

-

I think the word count was 29k something.. lol...if you made it all the way to the end, thank you so much for reading. it took months writing this and i enjoyed every bit of it- which is why I'm even happier that you've finished everything- thank you for taking your time to give this a shot and reading it <3

[yootaesowlwrites]

Hot When You’re Angry - Mark Lee

A14— “You’re hot when you’re angry. Not that you’re not already really hot!”

Warnings: Explicit language, descriptive scenes, smut, angry/frustrated!Mark, nudism, face sitting, oral(female receiving), bruising, cum eating, rough sex, unprotected sex(reader’s on the pill), aftercare.

W/C: 1.9K

Age Warning: I will not take responsibility because you wanted to read this, but if you’re under the  age of 18+, DO NOT INTERACT OR READ. Do not take this as educational, this is fiction!

You hear the front door slam and sit upright on the bed, you slowly lock your phone and put it aside, you wait in anticipation for him to appear in the doorway, you could hear him approaching, his footsteps heavy as he got closer, you swallow as your heart rate also picks up when he finally does appear in the doorway, your breathing gets caught in your throat, his eyes were dark, and he carried a certain air with him, you could sense he was angry or frustrated.

“Mark…” You whisper, your tone wavering for a moment, he takes in a deep breath and closes his eyes for a moment, he grips onto the doorframe, and you watch his muscles bulge.

“Baby… I need your consent that I can fuck you, that I can fuck away my frustrations,” He says, his tone sounded calm, but he looked anything but calm, you swallow, feeling wetness polling between your legs, what did he have planned to get those frustrations out?

“Yes,” You whisper, you watch as he bites his lower lip for a moment and tilts his head back, he takes in a deep breath once more.

“Take off your clothes,” He orders, lifting his head and opening his eyes, they almost looked black from where you were sitting, you quickly climb off the bed, reaching for your shirt and pulling it off, almost thanking yourself mentally for not putting on a bra, you hear him hum as you reach for your shorts and push them down along with your panties, you step out of them and look at him. “Fuck… always so perfect and ready for me,” He moves closer to the bed, his fingers swiftly moving over the buttons of his shirt before pulling it off. “It’s been a horrible day, sweetheart,” He sits down on the bed before moving to the middle of it and laying down. “Come here… come sit on my face,” You swallow and feel yourself only growing wetter, you slowly climb onto the bed and move to hover over his chest, his arms wrap around your thighs and his hands grip onto the crease of your hips, pulling you over his face.

“Ohh, oh, shit,” You whisper, closing your eyes at the sudden feeling over his face between your legs and his breath blowing against your moist pussy. “Mark, baby…” You manage to whimper out. “Who got you angry on your birthday?” You feel his fingers dig into your skin, surely creating bruises.

“I’ll tell you later, but right now…” He begins. “Right now I need to let out my frustration,” You gasp as you feel his tongue against your pussy, licking a stripe along your folds before his tongue slips past them and licks a stripe along the inside of your folds, your breathing quickly picks up, and you can feel your insides churning, his nose brushes along your pussy as he licks and pushes his face more into your pussy, you try and lift off, but his arms around your thighs kept you in place, you reach out and grip onto the headboard, his tongue circles your clit a few times before sliding to your entrance and dipping his tongue inside.

“Fuck, ohh, oh, my, oh, fuck,” You whimper out, squeezing your eyes tighter, he wasn’t giving any kind of mercy as he licked and pushed his tongue inside you, you could feel a tightening feeling building up inside you, your fingers were starting to cramp up from gripping the headboard, your back arches, and you want to squeeze your legs shut, the feeling was completely taking over. “Mark… Marrrkk,” The noises coming from beneath you as he licked and sucked, your toes curl as you feel a warmth suddenly go through you. “Mark, Mark, fuck…” Your legs squeeze against the side of his face, his hands grip tighter onto you, and the tightening feeling inside you snaps. “MARK!” You tilt your head back, sweat breaking out on your sweat, he moans against your pussy, the vibrations causing your walls to squeeze around his tongue. “Oh, my go— fuck!” You try and lift off, trying to get away from the stimulation, but he held you down on him. “Maaaarkkk!” Your fingers slip away from the headboard, and you hunch forward, pressing your hands into the pillows, you move one hand to his hair and grip it.

“Fuck, Mark,” You moan, pulling at his hair, you gasp as he suddenly releases you, and you lift off his face, you look between your legs at his face, seeing the lower half of his face covered with your juices, you watch as he licks his lips clean and moves his eyes to look at you.

“Fuck, you taste so good,” He groans out, he moves out from underneath you, and you move to lay down, watching him, watching as he climbs off the bed and hearing the zipper on his jeans being undone, you lick your lips as you watch his cock hits his lower stomach, the head coated with pre-cum as he does. “The company pissed me off,” He climbs onto the bed, turning you onto your back and moving between your legs, his hand slides over your thigh before moving his hand to his cock, and guides himself between your folds, circling the head of his cock around your clit.

“Maaark, Mark,” You whine, you reach up and grip the pillows as he slowly slides his cock down to your entrance.

“But I’ll tell you after I have all my anger out,” He says, it almost sounded like a growl as he spoke, he pushes the head of his cock into you, your jaw slacks at the feeling, he releases his cock and moves his hand to your thigh and slowly moves it to the inside of your knee, his other hand moves to the inside of your other knee.

“FUCKFUCK!” You scream as he hooks your knees over his elbows and pushes your legs against you as he thrusts into you, filling you to the brim, your eyes roll to the back of your head, your walls contracting around him. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, Maaarkkk!” He lifts his hips, his cock sliding from you halfway before he thrusts into you again, your tits bounce at the harshness of his thrust, your breath getting caught in your throat for a moment.

“Fuck, so damn good,” He grunts out, his thrusts were deep and harsh as, the sound of your wetness squelching sounded so sinful, and the sound of your whimpers and whines filled the room, bouncing off the walls with his groans and grunts. “Fuck,” His fingers grip the top of your thighs, digging into your skin.

“Mark, it’s so good, fuck, fuck,” You moan out, your head thrashing against the mattress, your entire body feeling on fire. “Maarrkk,” His low groans were making you clench around him, and causing your clit to throb.

“Fuck, sucking my cock right in, so needy for it,” He groans out, your walls squeeze around him, your insides churning as a tightening feeling builds inside you. “Such a good girl,” Sweat was starting to build up onto his skin, he could feel his muscles starting to pull with how hard you were squeezing him, he slides his hands up your thighs, over your tummy and cups your breasts, squeezing them.

“Fuck, oh, oh, hmm,” You moan, your back arching, and your hips lifting into him, his cock hitting the spot that makes you see stars, your body quivers with pleasure, you reach up for his shoulders, digging your nails into his skin.

“Fuck, that’s it, that’s right, mark me up,” He grunts out, your nails claw at his skin as your grip slips on his skin, leaving red marks behind, he thrusts harshly into you and moves one hand around your leg and cups your mound. “Cum for me, beautiful, cum around my cock,” His fingers find your clit, and begin rubbing it vigorously.

“Mark, Marrrk,” You moan out, your eyes shutting and stars begin forming behind your lids, your muscles begin pulling, and you could barely control your breathing, your back bends away from the bed, your toes curl as the tightening feeling inside you snaps, and pleasure rushes through you. “Maaarrrkkkk!” You almost turn onto your side from the pleasure, if he wasn’t holding you in the position you were, you would have turned onto your side. “Fuuuck, fuck, so good, ohh fuck.”

“Fuck, you are,” He grunts out, his thrusts becoming uneven as he begins chasing his high, the head of his cock throbbed with a second heartbeat. “Making a mess on the bed and my cock, fuck,” You could feel the insides of your thighs belongs wetter the harshest he thrust into you, you were coming down from your high and feeling another slowly building up, your muscles were shaking as you feel his fingers still rubbing your clit, wanting another orgasm from you.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, ohhh my fuck, I’m oh, oh,” You moan out, releasing his shoulders to grip onto the sheets, twisting your fingers into the sheets and tugging at it, your toes were starting to hurt from having them curled for as long as you did. “FUCK!”

“That’s it, one more, just for me, one more,” He groans out, his fingers relentlessly rubbing your clit, you could feel the knot inside you becoming bigger and bigger until it snaps, your walls clamp down on him as you release around him once more, making him groan as his thrusts halt, and he buries himself inside you, his cock twitch as your walls pulse around him, your body shakes beneath him, his mind begins spinning at the feeling and seconds later hot ropes of cum spills from him and into you, coating your walls with his load, he pushes your legs more against you, lowering his head to your chest, pushing the one breast he was holding into the side of his face, groaning against your skin as he fills you with his load.

“Fuck… fuck, so good, fuck,” You moan out, you feel him slowly move away from you, your legs being released from the hold he had on them, he slowly pulls out from you, your mixed releases spilling from you and making a mess on the bed, he lays down next to you on the bed, laying his arm over your waist and pulling you against him, breathing hard, trying to catch his breath, you slowly open your eyes, your walls clench, and you feel more of your mixed releases spill from you. “What made you this angry?” You turn your head towards him, he lifts his gaze to look at you.

“They wanted me to stay late and go through some things, but when I showed up, the person had cancelled on me,” He says. “And no one told me or let me know, and I was waiting for thirty minutes before I went to ask,” You nod your head, understanding his anger and frustration. “It just angered me, because we had plans, and we had to cancel them,” You could hear the pout in his tone as he spoke. “And I feel bad we had to.”

“Hopefully this made up for cancelling them?” You ask, turning onto your side, whimpering as you feel more wetness leaking from you. “But we can make new ones for the night?” He smiles and leans closer to you.

“Hmm, what kind of plans?” He asks, leaning closer to rub his nose against yours.

“Well, I can go clean up and put on the set of lingerie I wanted to put on for our date,” You say, he licks his lips and swallow.

“I think you should save it for tonight when we have dinner,” He says. “I think I may have plans for them, on how to use them… or ruin them.”

[blu-joons]

Sleepy Kisses ~ Lee Jeno

Your smile was wide as you slowly lowered yourself down after sliding your legs underneath the duvet, feeling an arm settle just underneath your head. You turned slightly to look at Jeno laying beside you as his arm wrapped around you and pulled you against his chest.

Your hand rested against his chest as you made yourself comfortable, feeling Jeno’s finger trace gently against your shoulder. As a small yawn escaped you, a chuckle came from Jeno as he kept his eyes watching you, easily able to tell just how tired you were as you rested for the night.

Jeno knew that you’d had a busy day, having rung him during your lunch break to vent about how stressed you were, he knew he needed to do something for you when you got home, deciding that a lazy night would be the best thing for you to help you out.

“Do you want to sleep now?”

Your head shook in reply to Jeno, keen to spend just a bit of time cuddled up to him first. As your head shook, he moved towards you and pressed several gentle kisses against the very top of your head, keeping each one soft.

“We can lay here like this all night long,” Jeno told you as a sigh of content came from you, relieved to be relaxed in Jeno’s arms, and more importantly, home, with him helping to clear your mind of the many troubles that were swirling around in it.

With your eyes staring forwards, across at the window where the curtains were drawn, Jeno continued to kiss over the top of your head. You’d lost count of how many kisses he planted until your head tilted up, with a wide smile on your face.

The moment he looked down and saw you looking back at him, Jeno leant further down to be able to peck against your lips several times too, knowing that he was distracting you as you focused on keeping your blush under control instead.

“What are you thinking about now?” Jeno asked you.

“You,” you smiled in response as he pulled away momentarily, “and how you always seem to know the way to cheer me up, how you get it right, every single time.”

“I just want to be able to help you,” Jeno told you as he replied, continuing to run his hand across the top of your shoulder, “I hate seeing you getting overworked, you don’t deserve it, you’re so strong and smart, but they just keep taking advantage of you.

Your head nodded in agreement with him, you couldn’t help but feel the same about how you were treated at work, constantly used by your colleagues.

“I wish I could get you out of there,” Jeno frowned, “there should be work at the company for you somewhere.”

“I can’t let you do that,” you responded, tapping your hand against his chest to let him know that you meant it.

Jeno knew that asking for help was something that you struggled with, you didn’t like to admit that you needed support, you liked to be tough and do it on your own, but on nights like tonight, you really did need Jeno to be there for you and help you to feel better.

And as ever, he was right there for you, supporting you and trying his best to make you feel better. Several more kisses were scattered all over the top of your head as soon as he felt that you were beginning to fret once again.

He kept his eye on you every time he pulled away from you, spotting each time that he looked down that you were getting sleepier and sleepier tucked up in his hold.

As his hand stopped moving, you looked up to Jeno in confusion. “What are you doing?” You frowned, missing the comfort that the patterns that he drew brought you.

Jeno quickly picked back up what he was doing again, noticing your smile drop as he met your eyes, frustrated that he had stopped wrapping himself tightly around you.

“I thought you were falling asleep,” he told you with a wide smile on his face.

“I’m not falling asleep just yet,” you assured him, positioning yourself back against his chest, “I want more of your kisses before I think about falling asleep anyway.”

“I think I can do that,” he joked in reply to you, tracing his lips through your hairline once again, having lost count of how many times he’d done it since the two of you laid down.

Each time you shuffled, Jeno found a new place to kiss, making sure that you were never left without one for too long. He had his eyes on you the entire time, knowing that the moment he caught you falling asleep, he’d let you rest.

“Has coming to bed early helped you feel better tonight?” Jeno asked you as he noticed your eyes staring forwards again, trying your best to get them to shut.

“You’re the thing that’s helped, and how incredibly caring you are towards me.”

“I’m just doing what any good boyfriend would do,” Jeno assured you, but your head shook, turning upwards to look at him once again, refusing to let him brush aside what he did for you.

Your eyes stayed on his as you spoke, “not many people would take care of their partners like you do, you’re always there for me, and I really adore that about you Jeno.”

A shy smile crept onto his face as you spoke, never really feeling as if he went out of his way to care for you. It was instinct in him, he simply loved being there for you and trying his best to see you smile again too.

“I know that you feel as if you’ve done nothing tonight bringing me up here and tucking me in nice and early, but it’s really comforting Jeno. Having you kiss me and hold me reminds me that I’m not alone, which is really what I need right now.”

“I’ll never let you be alone,” Jeno assured you, kissing against your forehead once again, “no matter how badly other people will make you feel as if you’re stranded.”

“You’re the best,” you smiled across at him, “I don’t even know what I’d do without you these days Jeno.”

“I reckon you’d be just fine; you don’t give yourself enough credit Y/N.”

Jeno was confident that you’d see it through, but he still enjoyed being the one that was there for you. He had promised himself when he started dating you that he’d stay by your side, and that was something that Jeno would never allow to change.

“Why don’t you try and close your eyes?” Jeno suggested, catching you letting go of a yawn as you turned away from Jeno to try and hide it.

“At last, I actually feel a little bit tired,” you weakly smiled, surprised yourself by how well Jeno’s plan had exhausted you. “I’ve been scared to sleep for a little while, but laying here with you right now is comforting me.”

“I’ll hold onto you all night long,” Jeno promised you, “we can lay for as long as you need, all through to the morning too. I’ll lay here and kiss the top of your head for as much as you need me too to help you out.”

“How will you sleep if you’re kissing me?”

“I’ll find a way to do it,” Jeno grinned, “I’ve got my ways to make things work.”

“I don’t doubt that you’ll find a way too.”

---

Masterlist

[thru-the-grapevine]

A Spoonful of Sugar

Pairing: Baker!Yuta x fem!Reader

Genre: fluff and absolute silliness

Word Count: 1717

In hindsight, you should have looked up your alternate route to work before just randomly picking one. But then again, how were you supposed to know that the new route would also have a bakery? Trying to curb your addiction to baked goods was going to be more difficult than expected. 

However, you would not be true to yourself if you didn’t at least have a quick peek at this new discovery. If therapy taught you anything, it was to follow your passions. And this morning, your passion just so happened to be whatever that delightful smell was.

So, you pushed open the glass door and made your way inside the warmth of the shop. Immediately, your senses were delighted with the smells of baking bread and freshly brewed coffee. In front of you stood a small, but packed display counter full of muffins, breads, pastries, and all manner of sweets. 

The menu behind the counter was handwritten a little messily, but still readable as you poured over the coffee and tea options. Oh, this was both a brilliant idea and an absolute mistake. There was no way you weren’t leaving without at least a blueberry muffin and a cappuccino to go. 

“Can I get you anything?” A voice jerked you out of your daydream of how wonderful a muffin sounded right about now. You looked over to the cash register where the most handsome man you’d ever seen was giving you a cheerful smile. 

He was also the last man you’d expect to be working at a cute little bakery had you encountered him on the street. His dyed red hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, revealing his dark brown roots. His ears were covered in earrings, and you spied several tattoos visible where he’d rolled up his sleeves. His clothes were dark and artfully ripped, a striking contrast to the pastel yellow walls around him, and the floral apron he wore. 

Oh, you were staring. Oops. You cleared your throat. “Um, yes! I’d like, uh, a blueberry muffin and…” you trailed off, eyes back on the drink menu. 

“If you like tea, the green tea latte is a personal favorite of mine,” the man said. “And I promise it’s not just because it’s my specialty.” 

Did he just wink at you? He definitely just winked at you. You coughed and mumbled, “Sure, I’ll try that.” 

The man grinned. He packaged your muffin and drink for you, rang you up at the register, and waved as you left the store with a, “Thanks! Please come again!” 

You were in such a daze the rest of your walk to work that you nearly walked right past the office building. Hoping none of your coworkers saw you, you waddled back to the building, flashing your badge at the security officer, saying, “Morning, Steve.” 

He wished you a good morning too, and you joined the throngs of people dressed in their best work clothes waiting for the elevator. Finally remembering you spent money, you took a sip of the green tea latte and had to stop yourself from exclaiming out loud. It was good! Normally, this type of drink wouldn’t be up your alley, but this one was delightful. You couldn’t wait to try the muffin. 

Once at your desk, you unwrapped the muffin and sighed happily as you breathed in the sweet smell. It only took one bite for you to decide you would definitely be going back to this bakery. The muffin was incredible, and somehow paired perfectly with the green tea latte. Maybe Mondays weren’t so terrible after all. 

The next morning dawned cold and rainy. The perfect morning for a piping hot coffee and a warm pastry, you mused. Naturally, despite the horrid weather, you found yourself walking to the bakery once again. 

And once again, you were greeted with the cheerful smile of the handsome worker, his hair once again pulled back in a messy ponytail. You couldn’t help smiling back with a shy wave. 

“Same thing as yesterday?” he asked, leaning on the counter. 

You shook your head. “I want to try something new. But thank you for the tea recommendation yesterday. You were right, it was amazing!” 

The man beamed. “You won’t find a better one anywhere! They’re a Yuta exclusive,” he said with a wink. 

You turned your head away just in case you were blushing. Couldn’t have him seeing that. But still, you were pleased. He told you his name. Yuta. 

All throughout your meetings, your mind drifted to Yuta. Even long after you’d finished your coffee and strawberry pastry, you heard his voice in the back of your mind. 

This worried you. After all, you had a career to focus on! Drifting away to thoughts of some pretty man who happened to know how to bake during important meetings was not like you in the slightest. You prided yourself on your impeccable work ethic, always striving for perfection, sometimes to the point of near exhaustion. But thanks to you, your department flourished. And for your efforts, the bonuses came frequently. You couldn’t complain. 

And yet, there you were, drifting into Yuta’s bakery every single morning. And every single morning he greeted you with a bright smile. When the weather was terrible, he made your warm drink as quickly as he could.

“You need to warm up your hands!” he would always exclaim. You didn’t mind. You had to admit, the attention was nice. 

Even when there were other customers in line, Yuta would have your green tea latte ready to go before you could decide on your morning treat. And every time you asked, Yuta had a recommendation. 

You weren’t sure if it was a coincidence, but you noticed some of your favorites becoming more regular in the display as well. No, surely this was a coincidence. They were probably some of his best sellers, so it made sense he’d make them more frequently. 

As the holidays approached, and the weather grew colder and grayer, you were grateful for the cheerful bakery and its warm goodies. Some mornings, you could barely get out of bed. Only the thought of a hot drink and a sweet treat could get you going. And maybe the thought of seeing Yuta helped a little. Maybe. 

You couldn’t help your attraction to him. He always seemed so at ease, so comfortable in the world, as if he could ride any wave life threw his way. 

You felt like his opposite: always dressed in professional clothing. It was a little stiff, but you believed in making the best first impression with your clients. And your world required deadlines and perfect reports. Yuta’s world was sugar and cinnamon, colors and laughter. Yours was spreadsheets and formalities. 

No, your silly little crush was just that: a silly little crush. Yuta was merely a polite worker, intent on making a profit with his business. You weren’t even sure he knew your name. 

One particularly frosty morning, Yuta decided to prove you very wrong. 

Your visit to the bakery started like any other. You ordered your drink and pastry (the cinnamon rolls smelled delectable). Yuta was cheerful as always. 

But as you went to check out, Yuta stopped you before you could pull out your card. “Today is on me,” he said. 

You took a moment to register his words, your attention focused on his hand covering yours. Was it warm in here? “Huh?” you looked up at him. 

Yuta smiled. “Today is on me. And… well…” You had never once seen Yuta hesitate. The man was always coming up with something to say, exuding confidence. But now he was almost unsure, looking away from you and fiddling with the hem of his apron. “I wanted to ask you… if you’d like to, well, I wanna take you on a date.” 

A date. 

A date. A date. A date?!

“I don’t have a whole lot of money, but I was wondering if you’d like to come over and, well, help me taste test? I have some ideas for the bakery, and you always seem so enthusiastic?” 

You stared at him. He wanted to bake for you. For you?? Feeling your heart speed up, you realized you hadn’t said anything. Poor Yuta was looking at you nervously, hopefully. 

You opened your mouth to respond when the front door slammed open. You jumped, turning instinctively to see a man in a mask, holding a knife as he stalked toward you and the register. 

Before you could react, he grabbed your arm, shoving the knife at you threateningly. “Gimme all your money, or she gets hurt,” he snarled at Yuta. 

Yuta’s eyes were wide, but he held his hands up. “Okay, okay, hang on,” he said carefully, moving to the register. 

Remembering him telling you he didn’t have much money, rage filled you. So you did what any sensible woman would do. You grabbed the man’s arm, placed your foot against his, and flipped him over. He cried out in surprise as you took the knife from him and stood on his chest with your full weight. “Don’t move,” you said coldly. 

You looked up at Yuta who was staring at you, mouth wide open. “How-” he started.

“Yes, I know martial arts. I have a stressful job. I had to unwind somehow,” you said defensively, a little embarrassed that you did all of that in your pencil skirt. 

Yuta’s open mouth formed into the widest grin you’d seen him do yet. “I would very much like to kiss you now,” he said dreamily.

You flushed. “That’s very sweet of you. Perhaps you should call the police first,” you gestured to the man groaning in pain beneath your feet. You were sure your heels could not be comfortable. Oh well. 

“Oh yeah,” Yuta said, turning to the phone. “But like, seriously, will you go on a date with me?” he asked before punching in the numbers. 

You hid your face behind your hands. “Yes, of course I’ll go on a date with you! Please, this is so embarrassing,” you mumbled. 

Yuta’s twinkling laugh would echo in your ears throughout your entire work day as you watched the clock, begging for it to move faster. After all, you had a date.

[moonctzeny]

hi angel 💕

can you please do taeyong + accidental stimulation please? 🥺

taeyong + accidental stimulation

genre: smut

wc: 667

warnings: semi-public sex, mutual masturbation

a/n: omg sara I feel so so bad for making you wait so long 😭 it's been a while since I've written anything so I'm really rusty but I hope you like this!! 💞💞💞

You can feel the deep bass of the party music resonating through your bones. The catchy beat is infectious enough to have you swaying along to the tempo, the drink you just downed numbs your thoughts just enough to not care who's watching. You don't mind the person who does, though.

Taeyong appears behind you so smoothly that it startles you for a second. The calloused hands that now run over your hips you know all too well. It's the same skillful hands that have drawn all kinds of pretty shapes over your most sensitive spots. The same hands that blur the line between friends and whatever the hell you become with a simple text when you're lonely. Hands that have had handfuls of you. The pads of his fingers are soft, triggering goosebumps on your exposed skin as they move lower. Whatever is poking your lower back, however, is hard.

"Really now? I didn't even do anything", you ask him incredulously, begging your voice to stay stable as he starts to grind into the softness of your ass. It feels like you haven't seen him in forever. You had no idea how much you've missed that overpriced cologne of his, seeping into your clothes from the close proximity.

"I love the way you look when you dance like this."

You don't like how much control he has over you at this moment. The hairs on the nape of your neck stand on edge as they're kissed by his breath. Pushing your ass out, you circle your hips right over his member, disguising the provocation as a dance move.

"Like this?"

The hiss he lets out feels victorious, yet the way he harshly brings you closer by your waist lets you know you're about to lose this war. You're not sure who leaned in first, but you know you two had the same brand of whiskey from how bitter his tongue tastes. Blindly stumbling through the busy hallways, with lips still moving against each other, you miraculously find an unoccupied bathroom to hide inside. 

The dull pain on your tailbone as Taeyong shoves you against the sink feels like nothing compared to the lust that overtakes you. He didn't need to whisper how much he needs you in your ear, you already know, yet you swear you'll never be able to forget the sound. If you were back at his place, you'd just rip at his clothes, strip him off of it all, eliminate every single barrier between the two of you. Instead, you settle for the next best thing, hastily undoing the buttons of his jeans until your hand fits inside the stretchy fabric. You relish in the deep moan that's coming from the back of his throat, wrapping your palm around his swollen cock before pumping him slowly. Feeling the need to reciprocate, he lets his hands travel underneath your skirt, pushing your skimpy panties aside until his index presses against your clit. 

You thought you needed him inside you, but there's not enough will in this world that could have you ask him to stop. Not as he adds another finger, letting it slide easily through your folds, embarrassingly wet at this point. And you know Taeyong loves how you play with him too, eyes tightly shut as you spread his precum all over his length, squeezing your fist a little tighter whenever you reach his tip. 

The way you share a shaky breath, lips featherly touching, is barely considered a kiss. Staring into his blown-out pupils, with sweat collected on your temples and tears welling up your eyes, you moan out his name as you cum. Ropes of white start to trickle down your knuckles just a few moments later, his hips staggering as he thrusts into your fist to ride out his high. The silent promise of a second round gets interrupted by an angry knock on the door. Not like that can stop you.

"This party sucks. Wanna get out of here?"

[writtenbymkl]

hi!! can i request talking to haechan who has a crush on you and then he suddenly send you a bunch of screenshots of your convo with him that were meant for mark

haechan confesses over text by accident

featuring: haechan x reader

genre: comedy

warnings: minor suicide joke

a/n: omg tysm for requesting this !! i had fun doing it 🤗 i hope this satisfied what you were looking for !! thank you for reading :3

[moonttaeil]

i've been waiting for you;

▶ Pairing: Jaehyun x reader. 

▶ Word count: 5k.

▶ one shot; very angsty; talks of violence; talks of domestic violence;if you're not comfortable of the idea of Y/N being abused please do not read; it does not have a very happy ending; im sorry; it has both jaehyun and Y/N pov's; (also jaehyun is not the abuser pls dont be scared)

“I’ve been waiting for you,” he said, still not looking at me. Something inside of me broke, scratched my organs, and made me bleed. Something inside of me cried out, harder than when receiving blows on my ribs. Something inside of me died the moment I heard his empty voice. I kept silent but he did not say anything else. It was an ending sentence, for me, for him, for what he could’ve been. We both knew, but we were both too scared to say it out loud. 

The first time I found myself in front of her the world around me fell. It is blurry, and I hope someday I’m able to make out what my thoughts on that precise moment were, but for now, all I know is her bright red lipstick draws me in like a month to a flame. Oh, what a flame she was. 

Her eyes silently called my way and my feet moved, pulled by the inevitable forces, a magnet she held close to her heart, hidden from the outside world, only felt by my hands that itched to touch her skin, burn themselves while trying to hold her near me, burn myself to ashes while trying to conquer something that was way out of my reach. 

It was a dark night. Not even the stars had shown up for our meeting. Her smile made up for that, although she was not keen to show it to me. Her lips moved; I heard her voice. I was entranced. I was hypnotized. I was immediately obsessed. Was she aware of how her presence affected me? If she was, she did not show a sign of it, not a flinch, not an intimidating glance. 

Somehow her glass was always full. She drank, and the moisture left behind on the edges of her mouth begged me to come closer. The stains on her glass, red, passionate, every second farther from me. I remember I answered her every question, I tried to be gentle, not raising my voice through the loudness of the bar. She seemed to be able to hear my every word, even the whispers that escaped from between my lips without my permission. 

I do remember the first time I saw her—I hoped to one day to forget. 

I always anticipated her entrance, and sometimes I was left only with broken hopes. She appeared and disappeared from time to time, leaving me wanting more, craving her presence. “I’ve been waiting for you” I would mutter out when she spent more than five days without checking by the bar, our place, our seats secretly reserved for ourselves. She would smile at me, slightly, almost imperceptible to the human eye. 

“Careful with waiting too long,” she would say, “some people become ghosts of the past while holding tightly on a dead idea.” 

I should’ve listened. 

Although we always sat by one another and talked, it had been the fifth time I saw her that I asked her the name that would stick with me for the rest of the years I had left to live. “Y/N,” she said, and I dreamt with her voice repeatedly. She did not ask back, and I felt uncomfortable. I wanted her to know—I needed her to think about it, to put a name on my face, to dream with it. “Jaehyun,” I answered back, trying to remain complete after being broken so many times by her eyes. 

She hummed in response. “I know.” I never asked how. 

Eventually, she decided to let me into her world. We stumbled out of the bar, her arm was wrapped around mine, trying to steady herself while she laughed at something, anything. Her eyes were shining so bright that night, the stars never dared to appear in her presence again. I couldn’t deny what was obvious, her trap for me had worked, excellently. Brilliantly. Her feet couldn’t walk straight, and in the end, I found a way to keep her on her feet without falling, dangling from my side. She never stopped laughing. 

“You drank more than usual tonight,” I commented, with no malice. No second intention. She was happy—disoriented, but happy. I was content to be able to spend time with her. She stopped and looked up at me, the remains of her happiness still written all over her forehead, cheeks, and chin. It was a second later, she sat on the curb, her knees finding their way to her chest. 

“Sometimes I feel like…” her voice trailed off, her eyes getting lost somewhere in the dark, in front of her, “like I have a lot of important things to say,” she muttered. I stood beside her, still on my feet, uncomfortable, trying to understand her mind. I realized I was still very far from the world inside of her body. “I know I have important things to say,” she repeated, but she was not talking to me, directly. “I simply…” a sigh, “don’t know what they are, yet.”

“It is hard to translate feelings into words.”

I sat beside her, in silence. My back hurt due to the position; she forced a smile back at me. 

“It’s not feelings,” she said, “a long time ago I had those, you know?” her question was not meant to be answered. Not by me. I listened. “Long time ago, when my body was not bruised, when my life was not threatened—when I was actually obsessed with living, with waking up, I was that girl.” 

In my eyes, she was still that girl. 

She kept quiet, reminiscing about the past. Her memories. 

“What happened to her?” I asked. I thought about it for a moment—if she ever was more, more, more than what she was now than what I only knew of her, my heart would not have been able to take it. Her eyes darted to me before moving slowly to look down.

“She…”

No words were needed for her to explain. She was dead, her old self, the young girl that wanted to eat the whole world before it eats her. She was dead, buried under the new Y/N that had risen to protect the corpse, the soul, the passion. “I just wish I could stop missing the old version of me,” she whispered before standing up. 

That night she left alone. I could’ve jumped right after her, I could’ve followed, and may be accompanied her back home. Everyone knew the streets were not safe at night, with dark alleys, and hungry eyes. I could’ve offered a helping hand. A conversation back home. But I did not. Instead, I stayed where I had been sitting by her side. Her presence lingered behind me, even when my eyes followed every step of her body leaving me behind. 

She did not come back for two weeks. 

When I saw her again, there was no trace left of the sour conversation we have had the last time. Instead, she smiled, sat by me, and told me what a stressful day she had had. I listened to her, being back next to her lifting my spiring at last. As usual, I said, “I’ve been waiting for you,” she hummed. “Wouldn’t it be nice if I waited for you too?” she had asked. 

I knew that was not possible. She was not obsessed – not anymore, -- with herself, as I was. It was a dangerous thought and feeling. I was playing with fire every time I saw her enter the bar. I was burning my fingers every time I let her smile at me. I was consuming my soul every time we left together, and let her go alone, leaving me behind. I was aware I would end up cremated, somehow, because of her. 

“Can I take you out to dinner?” I once asked. We were outside the bar. It was late, as usual. Her eyes looked up at me, surprised. I had been gathering the courage to ask her that question for the last four months, ever since the first time, I saw her. That night she wore a leather jacket, bruises hidden from anyone near her. I knew her answer. 

“You know I can’t,” and I knew she couldn’t. She had never explicitly said it out loud, it would damage the little bubble we have both threaded with caution, not overstepping the limits we have imposed for one another. I sighed, defeated one more time. It hurt to know that I’d always be at an arm-length distance from her, inevitably. She sensed the discouragement. She knew she was walking on a thin line; she was scared, and she was scatred. She could lose me the same I could lose her. 

I couldn’t be sure who would be losing more. 

“I want…” she whispered. 

“I know.”

It was a difficult situation for her to be carrying on her shoulders. I knew I was obsessed. She knew I was obsessed. I knew there was someone else in her life. She suffered their presence in her life. I knew I wanted to be with her, to let my fingers meet her body, to kiss her and let her fall asleep on top of my chest. She knew it would be a suicidal attempt to run away with me. “What do you say?” I rushed out, “when you go home late when you arrive drunk, what do you say?” 

She contemplated if she should answer or not. Her hands were now secured inside the pockets of her coat. Winter was coming, and we both knew it wouldn’t be long before we had to stop meeting in that bar, due to weather, and maybe other circumstances. “Sometimes I get away with it,” she simply answers, a smile trying to catch my attention while she spoke. “Sometimes I don’t.”

Although the questions were slowly rising inside my throat, and the feeling of rage crept behind my back, I kept my mouth closed shut. I knew—she knew I knew. She wasn’t hiding it, but she wasn’t giving me any details either. Her position was harder than mine, her chances to lose, her chances to win. 

“Jaehyun,” and the sound of her voice interpreting my name, it held me captive, and it would hold me captive forever, I knew. Jaehyun. Slowly, her fingers found their way to mine. It was a shy movement, she was breaking our secret agreement, she was trespassing the limits, the boards that held our worlds separated. “I think of you when I’m sad.���

It was a hard feeling to swallow. 

“How often?”

“Every night.”

I nodded. I held her hand tightly, I pulled her in. She let herself be pulled. Her feet took a step closer to my body. She did not look up at me. 

“I cannot ask you to come with me.”

“No, you can’t,” she whispered. 

“I cannot ask you to run away with me.”

“No, you can’t,” her eyes closed softly. 

“Where can I find you, if not here?”

She stayed silent. 

It had been three nights since I last saw Jaehyun. Every time I met him, I took a step closer to an inevitable ending for me, myself, my body, and my soul. I was aware—but what else could I do? He gave me the slightest hope. When he looked at me, he did not simply look at me. He saw me. He saw past and through me. I felt his eyes rummage through all my memories, which all belonged to me, only to me. But he still entered, he still tried to pick up the broken chaos inside me. He did that, unconsciously. 

I felt alive under his gaze. I felt awake when he listened to me. I felt mortal every time I took a step away from him, leaving his body standing still behind me, looking at me. I always fought back my emotions when that moment came around. Don’t look back, keep walking. Don’t look back, keep walking. Don’t—

And I did. I always left, and never asked him to follow. 

Then, I was alone. The sound of my steps was the only thing accompanying me, along with my cracking fingers. Walking out of the bubble, the thin edges, the comfort. Walking out of the light. Walking out of the passion—out of Jaehyun. But I knew better than to stop. 

I always tried to come up with an excuse, even if it wouldn’t work. Too much work? A night out with friends? Simple walk that took me out of reality. That last one I hoped to come one day true. The lights of the apartment building were almost all out. A cat crossed by me, hurriedly. The beeping sound of the numbers being typed in the little monitor, the display shining light blue. A deep breath after another. Jaehyun. My mind screamed his name. Jaehyun. Jaehyun. Jaehyun. 

Almost at my door—our door, what used to be our door, what used to hold so much meaning, now reduced to simple iron in front of me. The key was inside the lock. The lights are out, and then I know it’s imminent. 

I could’ve asked for help. But who was I to drag anyone, innocent, inside the hell that was built only for myself? Who was I to doom anyone else besides myself? The same questions repeat after I am inside. Where have you been, why do you come so late? Empty streets are not a suitable place for you—but if you've turned yourself into a whore, then I guess they are. I keep my mouth shut. 

He's in the dark. But I can make out the figure of his slouched body on the couch. He is not looking at me. I smell him. The booze. The weed. I turn around to avoid discussion, praying this night I’d be able to get away with it. When my body finally sides my room – our room, where we used to daydream about one day having a family, now reduced to an empty cage – my back is on the door. I hope he does not follow tonight—not tonight. 

Jaehyun. Jaehyun. 

It had been a lie. I had lied to him. I did not only think of him when I was sad. His name popped into my mind whenever I crossed the threshold of this house. 

Knocks on the door. My mind goes blank. I did not hear his steps. He wasn’t drunk. No, not tonight. He was sober, he had power. I wouldn’t get away with it tonight, I say to myself, I communicate silently to Jaehyun. I’m sorry I keep you waiting, I’m sorry I don’t appear, but the bruises will be too noticeable for me to face you like that. 

I turn around and open the door.   

I don’t go back to the bar for the rest of the week either. I know she won’t be there; Y/N won’t appear. That’s why I always pass by the glossy doors, a quick glance inside before turning my attention to the crowded street in front of me. If I were to be asked how I knew—I wouldn’t be able to explain. 

It was cruel. I knew it was cruel to let her go each night we spent a few hours together, I knew it was miserable of me to not run behind her and catch her and keep her safe, but who was I to even consider if she was not safe enough?  Maybe I was just a coward whenever it came to the moment to move and act. That’s why I stood still every time she turned around to leave, just watching her, trying to remember every step she takes in the other direction until her figure is completely lost in the shadows of the night. 

I knew it was cruel, but I couldn’t make myself overstep the boundaries she had imposed on me. 

That Friday I entered my house without going to the bar either. I was met with loneliness. I had created for myself a safe place where I couldn’t be harmed, I have created that space for me, only for me, my nostalgia imprinting every corner of the residence. 

I turned the lights on. I took off my shoes. I sat down on the couch. I could hear the neighbor kids laughing through the paper-thin walls. I could smell the dinner that was being made at the restaurant in front of our building. I could keep count of every car passing by my window. I was not focused. I was thinking of her. I was missing her. I was envisioning her in front of me, next to me, on top of me. 

I had to close my eyes. Y/N. The name, the smell, the laugh, the touch. 

I was losing myself to the delirium of not having her right there—right then. I needed her, I was poisoned by her, and I was addicted to her. Jaehyun, I could almost hear her say my name next to my ear. I opened my eyes, shocked. A thin layer of sweat had formed on my forehead, and neck, and nape. She was there—almost there. She would never be there. 

I couldn’t stand there any longer. 

I went back to the bar. 

It was Friday night and Y/N did not appear. 

When I met Jaeyhun again, it was too late. I had taken the decision to flee from that life, away from the darkness that had engulfed me. He was sitting on his – our – usual spot, his back now to the entrance. It confused me because he would always be the one looking ahead to the entrance, waiting for me. 

Three weeks had passed since the last time I saw him. Apart from me being too bruised to walk, I was not mentally ready to face him and lie to him. Lie. Lie. Lie. My heart nearly jumped out of my throat when I saw him, the outline of his neck, his wide shoulders. The darkness of his hair, cut perfectly but styled messily. I stopped. 

I felt like meeting him for the first time. I felt scared all over again. I felt nervous. I felt nauseous. Jaehyun. His name threatened to escape from my mouth in a form of a sigh. Even when I knew he shouldn’t, even when I had pushed him away from meeting so many times, disappeared, re-appeared, lied. It felt like the first time meeting him, although there was a big difference now. 

I made my way toward the table. He did not hear my steps. My hand slowly found its way to his shoulder, and I could feel him tense under my touch. The few times our skin has touched, I have always received the same reaction. His eyes darted down to his glass of wine; he did not look up. I knew why—I felt ashamed. For him, I had spent two hours in front of my mirror trying to conceal any leftover trace of the jealousy that had conquered my home years ago. For him I had painted my lips red; for him, I had practiced my smile and my words; for him, I had cried all my tears before taking a step outside of the house. 

I sat down, he did not look up. My heart skipped a beat. I knew it was too late. 

“I’ve been waiting for you,” he said, still not looking at me. Something inside of me broke, scratched my organs, and made me bleed. Something inside of me cried out, harder than when receiving blows on my ribs. Something inside of me died the moment I heard his empty voice. I kept silent but he did not say anything else. It was an ending sentence, for me, for him, for what he could’ve been. We both knew, but we were both too scared to say it out loud. 

“Once I told you I had important things to say,” I said quietly, he nodded in response, “and I know what they are now, although it might be too late.” His breathing was not even, and he was nervous. Another sip. The glass was suddenly empty. He didn’t wait for me to continue before turning around and raising his hand to the waiter, two fingers up, two more glasses coming our way. I was silent until our order came. He drank, and finally, he looked up at me.

“I am sorry I wasted so much time waiting for you,” he spoke quietly, “when I should’ve been looking out for you.”

“That would’ve been the worst situation.”

He took another sip. He hated himself—I hated myself even more, for making him see me like this, how I really am, what I really am. The misery I’ve felt for the last four years crept onto my neck, my hair, my head. 

“I’ve been trapped—I am, still,” I said. He nodded in response. “Trapped in my own life, and even if I wanted, I wouldn’t be able to reach you, let you take me away with you.” He nodded again. His head hung low. “I am ashamed of myself, Jaehyun.” 

It wasn’t explicit. He didn’t need explicit. I had left one bruise on my forearm without concealing it. I have left it for him to see, the surface of the situation. “You shouldn’t.” He said back. I knew—but I couldn’t afford to not be ashamed, not now that I am what I have always feared. 

“Wherever I looked, I always saw you. On each surface, on each ad. Women passed by me on the street and my brain tricked me every time into believing it was you.” He held his breath and so did I. 

I wanted to apologize again. Bring me down to my knees, bow my head low for him.

“It’s not your fault.”

His words took me out of my imagination. Reality shocked me to the core. It’s not your fault. His words repeated over and over again inside my brain, burning deep down, burning into ashes. But it is, I wanted to scream. It is. It is. His eyes never left mine. My mouth never opened. Not a single sound. “It’s not your fault, Y/N.” He spoke. 

“You don’t know—”

“I don’t need to.”

I finished the alcohol in my glass. He didn’t know. He shouldn’t know. He was good—Jaehyun was not him. Jaehyun was not mad, he was never mad. Jaehyun would understand if she left. Jaeyhun always understood when she disappeared. “I’ve come here tonight to…” I repeated the sentence I had running inside my mind for the past three weeks, “to say goodbye.”

He was silent and suddenly the noise that filled the bar that we were so used to being in vanished. It was him and me. Me and him. His eyes were on my lips. My tears were in his hands. He was there, finally—I have wished for him for years. I have dreamt with him, for him. I have fought for him, because of him. I have made stupid things; I have dug my own grave. 

“You don't want to.”

He was hurt when he said that. His voice broke. I broke.

“You haven’t even kissed me yet, and you want to say goodbye?” he laughed, out of sadness. I couldn’t bare to look at him anymore. Because he was right, I didn’t want to—but I didn’t want to live scared, scarred, for the rest of my life either. I didn’t want to bring him down with me, down the spiral of self-destruction I have created. I didn’t want to snatch away from him the years he had left to find happiness for himself. 

I have burnt all the bullets. He has the gun still loaded. 

Even if we wanted to, we couldn’t be on the same page. 

“I’m sorry.” 

“No—you’re not,” he whispered. He was not mad. He spoke his mind. His words were harsh. But still, there wasn’t a hint of him being mad. 

Jaehyun. Jaehyun. Jaehyun. Jaehyun. 

Mind screamed for my hands to reach out to him. Let him hold me. Let him take all the pain away. Please, Jaehyun. 

“I am,” I said back. 

“You don’t have anything to apologize… at least to me. But…” he stopped. “If there is someone you ought to apologize to, is yourself.”

I stopped breathing. The tears burnt inside my eyes. I had to close them, cage them. But the more I insisted, the more they burnt, the fire spreading down my throat and reaching my lungs, imprisoning the air. It was hard to breathe. 

“Y/N,” he was demanding, he was begging. “Y/N.” It hurt, listening to my own name slip was his lips. “Where is that girl you talked about? The one obsessed with life—with the passion that came with being alive?” he questioned me, it hurt. “Where is that girl that you talked about? Find her, Y/N.” His words stabbed me. It was impossible—

“Find her, Y/N, before you let yourself die,” and with each word, his knuckles turned whiter, his fist on top of the table, “before you apologize to me from your grave, for leaving me, again. Find her.”

I wanted to speak back. I wanted to tell him that she was no longer here. I wanted to—I couldn’t. Jaehyun. His eyes burnt holes in my face, I felt as if I was disintegrating. I knew I loved him—Jaehyun. I knew before I came tonight, that it was too late to love him. He, as well, had gathered hate. 

“Jaehyun.”

And a tear slipped down his cheek as well. It glistened under the dim lights of the bar. We were still surrounded by people, but it was us. Only us. Only our memories together, only the minutes we have shared, only the seconds we have left.

That was the last time I saw her before years rushed by trying to bury her face in the depths of my memory. She was right, she came to say goodbye. She left. She disappeared. She did not come back, not to me at least. 

How many years have passed since I burned my last shot with her? Maybe ten, maybe fifteen. Every day I went to the bar. Every day I sat and waited, lonely, surrounded by my nostalgia, silently crying while drowning in many, many, glasses filled to the rim with the disgusting liquor that somehow managed to blur her face from my memory.

Although it hurt to lose her completely, I managed to stand up again. I picked up the pieces, held them together, and I glued them to one another even if they didn’t fit. I refused to be held to my knees for her — for the girl whom I have never really met, for her ghost. I left the bar one day and I didn’t come back. I turned my back to the place, to her, to our memories, and to myself. I moved. I disappeared. I followed her steps, never knowing where the road led. I tried to not rot, I tried to make myself a great man. I survived, without her, without the part of me that she held forever. 

And I did. It consumed me, just as I have predetermined she would do even before meeting her for the last time. Because I knew— there was no one else to blame but myself. That last time I saw her I held her in my arm, and let myself indulge in that little moment we had created for ourselves, the last moment we would share together. I remember her scent. I remember her hands holding tight to my arms, her fingers trembling. She did not want to let me go, and yet she did. She did not want to draw me to her madness, and yet she did. She did not want to hurt me, and yet, she killed a part of me that would never revive. 

And, although all that happened, I managed to get up from my knees. 

I couldn’t hold myself hostage in the past while grasping onto the thin threat that held the idea of her coming back to me. 

I also let her go. 

The years have passed and I sigh as I make my way to the kindergarten where my children await for me to pick them up. I walk slowly, thinking about all the tasks we have for today. I think about my wife, such a lovely girl, such a respectful woman, and such a responsible mother. I think about her, and my heart aches. Because I love her— I do love her. But I am not obsessed with her, with her existence, her passion. She has never had her lips painted deep red. She has never had me waiting for her, she was always early. She never kept her mysteries to herself, she shared her life with me. 

I loved her and yet— I don’t.

I pass by a bookshop. The path I take every afternoon is the same. I’ve been to that bookshop many times before. I’ve shopped there, and I’ve spent evenings with my kids looking for the right book for nighttime. And yet I stop, my feet suddenly forget how to move. Because she was there— her face was there. Her eyes were there. Her red lips were on the cover. It was both improbable and impossible. I had given up on the idea to see her again years ago. She looked at me, right at me. Her picture draws me in. I stepped inside the bookshop. 

Without giving it a second thought I pick up the books. 

It’s not your fault, it’s the title. She’s holding onto a glass of wine, and I recognize the surroundings of the photo. The dim lights and the chairs were where they used to spend every night when they saw each other. She was in their reserved seats. The entrance was behind her. It felt like I have been the one taking the photo. 

Years have passed, and they left a mark behind. She had wrinkles, she was thinner, and her cheekbones were way prominent now. Her bare shoulders showed in the photo, and more than one scar was recognizable. Time was not kind to everyone but to her— time did not exist. She glowed, she still had the magnet that pulled me in. I held the book and my mind drifted back in time to when I would wait for her, for hours, for days, and for weeks. 

“Jaehyun?” The voice of the lady who works there takes me out of the trance, the little bubble that appeared again after so many years of living like a mortal. I turn to look at her, stunned, pale probably. She smiles and nods towards the stack of books with her face on them. With Y/N smiling at me. “It’s the new best-seller, a biography by a survivor of domestic violence,” she explains, “but I don’t think Mariko will like that kind of book.” She’s talking about my wife. She believes I want to buy that book for my wife. Oh, how naïve she actually was. 

“Thank you,” I mumble and turn around to look at the book between my hands again. 

Slowly I open the first page. 

I’ve been waiting for you, J. I want you to know that it is not your fault I left.

[theficblog]

FORELSKET

NAKAMOTO YUTA

Prologue: Yuta has been your biggest rival on the field, in your perception at least, but a childhood playmate wouldn’t leave you crying alone.

Genre: Fluff + Enemies to lovers

Wordcount: 1,545

Warnings: Injury + Blood + Language

You were panting. It could’ve made it hard for even your Apple Watch to track your heart rate and blood oxygen levels by now. Beads of sweat now adorned your forehead and flicks of hair, running mindlessly to any place they could find. Your silky hair refused to be tied down into a ponytail, making it harder for you. You were not bothered by your appearance, though; you were just happy you made it on time to the ground.

It was the last day of school right before it shut for the summer, which meant the last day of your football game before a two-month halt. Football, at this point, was the only thing you felt like putting an effort into. It had been your longest companion, ever since primary school. You were not the best at academics to begin with, but using sports as your advantage key to university admission was clever of you.

FWEET!! The coach took to the whistle, ordering you and your teammates to put yourselves together. Today was no ordinary day, after all. Your school was playing the rival school, and maybe it was the legacy that the seniors set up, but rivalries like these were taken with much seriousness.

Without wasting much time, you all gathered, dressed in red shirts and shorts. The numbers on your backs, sweatbands, and fancy tight socks, along with the expensive cleats, the spikes, added to the dangerous and fiery overall look. The team soon started with their usual warmup before the game.

You excused yourself to the side. The scorching summer heat worsened your parched throat. You took the ice packs and frozen water. This was a little moment of calm. Your brain could not even register when, all of a sudden and out of nowhere, a football came piercing through the air, as if a bullet had been fired from a revolver. Maybe you counted your lucky stars, you were blessed enough to be shielded from the ball hitting you right in the face, or worse, causing embarrassment in front of a dozen people.

You rolled your eyes as your gaze fell to the source of all this.

"Yo! What the fuck?! That could have hit me!" You raged. There was no way you could afford any sort of injury at this crucial stage. Your eyebrows furrowed as you started spitting out the fire.

"That was kinda the point." That was what you were reverted with. No, he did not care at all. At this rate, it seemed more like a pass time for him to agitate and irritate you for no reason. The boy rolled his tongue on the inside of his cheek, followed by a smirk. Gosh! Yuta really knew how to get on your nerves.

He wasn’t from the opposite team, but he sure was your biggest rival. He was an absolute ace. The only other center-forward on your team besides you. Football suited him. His long black locks, sometimes tied back in a ponytail, complemented his face as he ran across the field. The shorts he wore exposed his perfectly built and buff thighs. His tackling and positioning were beyond accurate, as he rarely missed a goal. Yeah, sometimes he put his arrogance in front of him and did not pass you the ball. You wish you could punch him in the face at times like that.

Back in the good old and younger days, you two were inseparable. You still remember the time you both initially started with the game. "Y/N You pass the ball to me and then I return it to you!" Little Yuta of six suggested. Two little enthusiastic kids, all they looked forward to were the ice cream treats after the evening practice when your mothers picked you up from the playground.

Things do not always remain the same, though; people change. You were not little kids of five anymore but rude and ruthless teens. Whatever it might have been, it was what it was.

Back to the moment, you would have normally rolled your eyes dramatically or just ignored that boy, but there was this little thing that made your blood boil even more. The pretty girls, whom you assumed to be the cheerleaders and who a ninety nine percent wanted to get Yuta’s attention, saw you. Yes, Yuta had always been a hot topic amongst the girls- and even boys.

They sat in a group of three. For some reason, the dumb and mean ones always flocked in a group of threes. They let out a chuckle and started with their counterfeit empathy towards you. "Ohh! Y/N! Are you okay? Was it too fast for you to comprehend?" ,"Yuta deserves to be the team captain! Look at how cool is he!" They were making fun of you - something that anyone would naturally hate. You, too, hated it. You had an image and were very particular about maintaining it.

Your eyes met Yuta’s. There appeared to be a reflection of regret in his eyes but you couldn’t care less. You’ve had enough, just as you were about to throw hands.. PHWEET!! The whistle blew again. Oh Shit! The game was starting. Why is there always an interruption at the most anticipated moments.

The game turned out to be in your team’s favour, a 5-2 win. All the runnings, pantings and crampings had paid off at the end. You sure were happy your side was the victorious one, but beating Yuta whist being in the same team made you inflate with pride. You contributed three out of five goals, whereas on the other hand, he could secure none. You see, hurting his pride was way better than embedding a punch bruise on his handsome face.

You noticed him sprinting towards you. Was he going to apologize for what he did before? Nah, he wasn’t that type. He sat himself on his ankles as he bent down, placing his sweaty palms on your knee. "Are you alright?" He inquired. "Of course, why would-" You halted suddenly as you took notice of your joint, which was ceaselessly bleeding. All the resentful emotions in your head made you so numb you couldn’t even care to take a notice of it.

"Mmm, it’s going to be okay, Y/N. This is probably from when you slid on the grass." He said as he placed your foot on his thigh, so as to take a closer look. "Stop it, Yuta! You’re going to get me ridiculed by the pretty ones, again!" You fumed at him. This wasn’t the first time that one of you treated the other’s wound. Twelve years of sports together brought incidences like these quite more than often, however, this time wasn’t it. You put force to your leg, trying to get it out of Yuta’s hold.

"You’re not the Y/N who would bother to think of all that shit, you’re the Y/N I know since we were babies." Yuta voiced, without letting go of your leg, as he now started to blow his breath on the damaged spot, which was being disinfected by the antiseptic. You stood there like an animated character that had not yet been assigned a facial expression.

"Y/N, I’m sorry. Did that really hurt you?" He queried, still devoting all his attention to your knee. "Come on! What am I? Seven? That’s just a cut, quite deep but yeah, I’ll be fine." You explained. This was the uniqueness of your and his relationship; it could be bitter like poison, but that did not mean an absence of communication-it could be swearing, taunting, occasional jokes, but it never stopped.

"Not this dumbo! I’m sorry for what I did earlier." This much was enough to get the tears to start rolling down your cheeks.

Emotionally, you were a mess.

"Hey hey hey, Y/N! No! I’m sorry, please, stop crying! Whatever it is, I’m sorry, look it’s so much better than dying, right?" So much better than dying- his signature words, of course, most of the times, things were very much better than losing life. Yuta was panicking, trying everything he could to make you stop crying- but you were nowhere near it.

He rose up, holding your face with his hands, which were now coloured red with your blood. His thumbs positioned themselves on your cheek as they swept away the tears. He was looking at you right in the eyes. "Stop crying, Y/N. Hmm?" He hummed sweetly in his deep, manly voice. You nodded, trying to get back to normal.

A grin took over his face, like a sudden beam of sunlight illuminating the darkest corners of the room. You reciprocated it. By now, you were much more calm. He tilted your head a bit more, punching his lips ever so softly on your sweaty forehead.

The sun was bidding its daily farewell as the sky gradually changed its colours. Orange, then a darker purple with a pinch of tint. The jet streams from the airplane margined the two shades. The birds were on their way home, and so were the daily commuters. It had been a tough day for everyone.

You took a glance at Yuta’s eyes, shining and sparkling like the moon that would soon embellish the night sky.

LET ME KNOW YOUR VIEWS + ALSO SEE : MASTERLIST

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[scarletwinterxx]

if life is a movie, you're the best part - na yuta imagine

helloooo- before anything, I SAW 127 LAST SUNDAY AND OH MY GOD I think Na Yuta bias wrecked me. I swear he caught my attention the whole night. His stage presence is on a whole another level.... that's why we're here right now.... so i hope you like this one! 💛

if you have a request or scenario you want me to do, just send me a message I'll see what I can do😊💌

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

It's currently way past midnight and Yuta just got in. Usually he would make sure to be home in time for dinner but tonight his schedule held him back. His home was quiet by the time he opened the door, assuming that you were already in bed.

So now he's heating up dinner in the microwave while reading the grocery list you stuck on the fridge door, smiling at the little drawings all around courtesy of your daughter.

He was too engrossed with reading that he didn't notice you coming down the stairs. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you spot your husband smiling at the piece of paper. You also spot the countdown on the microwave about to go off, quickly an quietly you trudge over to turn it off before the count down ends. Yuta having a little scare when he saw you,

"Baby, why are you awake?"

"Your son is kicking my bladder" you tell him, turning to face him and give him a hug. Yuta smiles, kissing the top of your head and hugging you as close as your pregnant tummy would allow him.

"The kids giving you a hard time?"

"Kaori had fun during soccer, she's an active kid. Her coach said she can play for the team next time if she keeps it up. She's only 7 and she's already a protege" you chuckle,

"That's my girl" Yuta says, "How about my boy, you two doing okay?" you feel his hand rest on your bump

"He thinks my inside is the soccer ball, I swear he's kicking in there. Damn you and your genes" you joke.

This made Yuta laugh, leaning down to capture your lips in his. Earlier he was really tired but now it's like he's re-energized. He wish he could spend all day with you and Kaori, but he got to go to work and provide.

It's not like he's being old fashioned and making you stay at home with the kids. Quite the opposite actually. Before you got pregnant with your second, you worked for a big fashion brand.

You were home until Kaori turned 1 then Yuta took the role of being the stay at home dad. And he loved every second of it, he loved being there whenever his little girl needed him.

But now Kaori's 7, your once little baby now a growing girl. The second pregnancy came as a surprise but both of you were very happy about it. This time though you're sick all the time during the first trimester. Then one time during the second trimester your tummy contracted and it gave the two of you slight scare but all is good now. So Yuta made you stay at home for the time being, for your and baby boy's safety.

"You should've woken me up" you tell him when the two of you broke apart

"I can heat my own dinner don't worry about it, you need to rest" he kisses you once more before stepping back to get his dinner from the microwave.

He sits on the bar stool by the kitchen while you pour drinks for the two of you.

"But I missed you, also Kaori was waiting for you she wanted to tell you all about her training today" you tell him, taking the seat beside him. He offers you a bite but you shake your head, not really hungry.

The two of you just talk quitely about how your day went, he cleans up after finishing his dinner while you wait for him.

After he's done he checks all the doors and windows downstairs before going back to you. Taking your hand and leading you upstairs.

"I'll go change and check on Kaori, you go to bed" he tells you.

He changes from his office clothes to his basketball shorts he loves wearing to sleep, leaving the shirt behind. He knows you love to cuddle him shirtless.

Yuta goes and opens his daughter's door, seeing the tuff of dark hair peaking from under the blankets. He smiles, whispering a quiet goodnight before shutting the door and making his way to your bedroom.

You're laying on your side, waiting for him. He shuts the door and the lights before sliding right beside you. Immediately you scoot over so you can hug his arm.

Before you can cuddle him fully, but since your bump is getting bigger and bigger everyday you can't really do that anymore. But he knows you can't sleep without hugging him or having any skin contact so he lets you do whatever you're currently comfortable with.

"Why don't I hug you instead?" he asks, just like he did last night. He already knows the answer but he tries anyways.

"Nooo, then you'll be the big spoon" you grumble. Nuzzling your face on his shoulder while he watches you lovingly.

"Why not? You love it when I'm the big spoon, you love it even better when I-" "Okay I'll stop you there, I like it when I'm not as big as a balloon. But your son is currently growing inside of me so let me be"

He giggles, the man giggles before leaning over to kiss you on the head before setlling back down on the bed.

"Whatever you want, my wife. Now go to sleep" he tells you. He feels you kiss his skin, then you're back to cuddling his arm. In your words that's an I-love-you. After being married for so long he already knows even without the words.

"I love you" he tells you then he's off to dream land too.