#near accident

[omo-honey]

Okay so I almost had a real accident last night AND today and it was totally miserable, but you guys will appreciate it anyway 😭

I went out drinking last night with some friends at a bar I have never been to before. I had two waters and two drinks and they hit my bladder all at once. I talked with my friends a little longer because I was enjoying the conversation, and then I headed to the restrooms. I walk into the men’s bathroom and oh my god they ONLY had urinals. No stall. No toilet. So I leave and luckily they also had a unisex bathroom. So I knock. No answer. Try to open it. Locked. So I stand outside the bathroom door for 10 minutes, crossing my legs and shifting, trying to look casual. Eventually the person leaves and I have the HARDEST piss of my life. It was so relieving…I had to go again before we left about 30 minutes later. Luckily nobody was in there, because by then I was getting pretty drunk and don’t know if I could’ve handled waiting.

Then TODAY, for my sister’s birthday we (me and my two sisters) pile into the car for a 2 hour drive to a Japanese market that has food, shops, bookstores, etc. I went to the bathroom before we left, and had literally only half of a bottle of iced green tea and a few sips of water. For whatever reason, an hour into the ride, I’m suddenly feeling full. I press on my bladder, thinking, “maybe I’m not actually full and I’m psyching myself out.” Oof. That press hurt. Now I work in a restaurant and have an IRON bladder. I can wait hours to go to the bathroom. But I think the alcohol from the night before did me in, because not 20 minutes later, my bladder feels like a huge water balloon on the verge of bursting. I was legitimately scared I was going to piss myself. There was 40 minutes left of the ride and I was getting nervous. We were on the highway. I finally spoke up when the GPS said we were taking an exit in 2 miles. I asked if we could stop at the first gas station when we get off on the exit and they said sure no problem. I didn’t tell them how urgent it was. 20 more minutes later (20 mins left of the ride) I’m constantly shifting my feet and clenching and unclenching my muscles. There has been absolutely no sign of a gas station, convenience store, or ANYTHING. I’m scared I’m going to wet my tan shorts and have to literally turn around and go home after an hour and 40 minutes of driving, ruining my sister’s birthday. FINALLY, with only 12 minutes of the ride left, I spot a Walgreens. We pull in, and when I got out of the car, I felt like I had a fucking boulder sitting above my hips. I couldn’t stand up completely straight, it was that tight. I manage to carefully walk at a slightly faster pace into the Walgreens. I don’t see a sign for a restroom, and the cashier was busy, so I walked up to the pharmacy counter. There was one man back there. I said “excuse me” before realizing he was on the phone. He held up a finger to give him a minute. I did NOT have a minute left. I’ve never been this desperate in my life. I hobble around the back of the store, I’ve now walked almost the entire perimeter of it and there’s a creeping horror that this Walgreens might not have a public restroom. I’m starting to freak out, because if they don’t, I will NOT make it to another place before my bladder gives out. Finally, I see a hallway. No signs or anything. Go down past a break room, and FINALLY see a bathroom. There was one stall in that bathroom. Someone was looking out for me, because it was empty. When I sat down, my bladder had a hard time letting go for a second…and then it gushed out of me so hard I’m sure anyone could’ve heard it from outside. I peed for a minute straight and then it stopped…another gush…stop…another gush…and kept going on like that for another minute. By the time I finished, my shorts felt loose!

I couldn’t believe the irony of the whole situation, I was TERRIFIED Y’ALL. Anyways.

TLDR: I almost pissed myself and ruined my sister’s birthday.

[rttnpnkpmpkn]

I swear, what is it with some people driving like they can afford a car crash 😡

I’m already driving at a near 60 with other cars in front of me, the driver tailgating me is dumb as hell and reckless!

[tom4jc]

Benefit Of Listening And Obeying God

Several weeks ago, I was driving through town in my company work truck. I had come up to a four way stop sign intersection and made a complete stop. There was no one directly at any of the intersections, however, there was one truck coming down the road from my right side. This person had plenty of time to stop for the stop sign from where I saw him. As I was about to pull out and cross the…

[tottallytoby]

the first time either of them have slept in days

[todayisafridaynight]

[harimenui-forever]

Wolf359 is so funny cuz every single time a new person arrives on the Hephaestus station they are like "okay let's do this thing :)" and then they're hit with the inevitable disaster that always happens

NOBODY is immune

Not even Cutter himself

[moominpopzz]

I feel like with how long Ashe was isolated, she probably has a really bad habit of monologuing to herself or talking while watching/doing stuff or commenting on shows and movies thruout the literal entirety of them so that she felt less lonely in her house. Like she probably would still do it for awhiiile after joining PD, even when with them because it’s had so much time to get integrated into her normalcy

[murderbees]

more Tron thoughts

Training new security programs before and after

So, Early Tron, He's just happy. It's safe, and he's fulfilling his purpose, protecting The Grid. The new moniters rezz in, sure they have all the knowledge, the moves, but they don't know anything yet, they don't know HOW to fight. So they train, and the first thing he does, is let them all try to beat him. They all lose of course.

He laughs, and teaches them how to fight. They run through senario after senario, and sometimes he shows off a little. A flip there, a jump here, but the new moniters? They eat it up, they want to do the same, protect, fight, and show off. He's happy to be their model.

Later Tron is more cautious. He's not the only one in charge of security anymore, and he can't tell which ones will get "transferred" to Clu. He teaches the necessities, and the few who stand out get brought into his squads quickly and viciously. He can't keep them all safe, but he tried his best.

Uprising Tron only trains Beck. All his past monitors are derezzed or rectified. He hates how weak he feels, he can't even train Beck one on one, relying on simulation after simulation. He's proud, and Beck learns so quickly, but if Tron could just train him like he used to, it would go faster. Beck wouldn't just survive each encounter, he could win. But Tron is crumbling to his scars, and Beck can't devote all his time to being the Renegade. They make do with half measures and patches.

Rinzler doesn't train anyone, not really. Some other program teaches the rectified to fight, and Clu sends them to him. He doesn't really fight, shows off for Clu, but always, about half are derezzed. The survivors move on, are sent out, the rest are swept off the platform. He doesn't care, not really. Just another fight, another game to play. He always tries to stay and watch the voxels fall into the pits as the janitors clean. Sometimes Clu doesn't let him.

For fun, Clu will make him fight old squad members. Rinzler doesn't know who they are, neither do they. But he figures it out quickly, they move too similarly to him. Clu stops the fight before they get derezzed, usually.

Tronzler hates training. He knows too much, is too fast and too deadly. Easy for him is death to another. He only fights the best, they barely survive. If he could never train them, he would, but The Grid needs it's protection, and he will fulfill his purpose.

[sixoclockuty]

So uh

How DOES Starlo end up like... that, in the Red Giant Star AU?

tldr: after integrity kanako and chujin die and before clover starlo fucked up and got into a near death situation bc he was being…. reckless kinda. and his body didn’t like that very much and became a red giant

the longer answer is. after chujin and kanako both had passed away, ceroba was under a lot of stress— as was the rest of the underground due to the snowdin attack and all. even though the human was dead it didn’t mean things were suddenly stress free. anyways starlo was ALSO stressed out and due to that did what he knew how to do. distract himself and everyone else!!

due to that his little sheriff missions kicked up and got much more intense. after all, distracting himself is how he copes, and if he doesn’t have time to think, then it’s fiiine right?? so they just keep getting worse (and eventually he’s just doing it by himself occasionally since it gets to be too much for the feisty four and all). so he���s being pretty reckless as of late

yeah well unfortunately this has consequences. i haven’t entirely decided what he was doing exactly but like right now im thinking trying to repair something at a high place— like, maybe the feisty five house roof or something. and he fucking FALLS because he got a little bit too bold.

i dunno, but it’s definitely a near death experience. and he definitely falls somewhere bc he was being careless and it knocks all the air out of him. since he’s in shock, he isn’t able to get any air back in ! so his body starts trying to use the hydrogen to keep him. yk. alive. which doesn’t work! because he runs out of fucking hydrogen!!! and now he can’t nuclear fusion or fission!!! so his body is like “well. fuck.” and red giants itself bc he’s out of hydrogen and he can’t get anymore man. so now he’s all fucked up but luckily help was on the way and uh saved him kinda. except now he’s fucked up and like super tall and red. and constantly in pain and gives regular monsters burns just from touching him. great. they didn’t do a very good job in saving him. he’s slowly dying now guys. :(

alternatively i just took all of his hydrogen one day and he went bam

[ghcstcd]

Swisstopher, I know you've got the prettiest boyfriend in like the history of the universe, but i'm available-

[seepingfrommyskin]

Something tells me she doesn’t want a hug

(Bonus closeups)

[kedreeva]

I would love to hear about the otherworld marketplace

oh right!

Okay, so the REASON I went the expo yesterday, when we weren't planning on it previously because it is Distant, is because my friend that takes me had to exchange some caging, and the crafters were going to be at the show, so why not vend as long as we're out there if we're driving 2+ hours each way anyway. So we vend the show, it goes well, we have fun, everyone's packing up... except the vendor she's exchanging caging with, who tell her they're going to be at least another hour packing up etc and also they don't have the cages with them, we'll have to drive to their brick and mortar shop.

Well, whatever, that means we can go grab some food. We look up sushi places, grab the first/closest one, and drive out. GPS takes us to a mexican restaurant. we fiddle with the GPS and when swapped to "walking" it tells us actually it's across the street. We can't see across the street because of trees, so we drive across the street, and there's a Mall. Like a legit, old mall- and I realize with a bit of dawning horror that I KNOW this mall, it was built a couple of years before I went to college, it was shiny and new when I first visited it, we used to come here often. I did not recognize it because it looked like it at been through some kind of apocalypse. So I turn to my friend and say, we have a choice, we either go in and get Mall Sushi from a food court, or we pick someplace else. She stops her car in the middle of a road, not a parking spot, and we both look at the list of sushi places nearby. I see one just plainly called "sushi market" and it looks normal and there's a picture of its storefront indicating it is, perhaps, not Mall Food Court Sushi, and we take off.

I am expecting a Hole In The Wall sort of strip mall place like the two near my childhood home, but instead we enter The City.

The City, if you do not know, is the same place. You enter into it and you may or may not have been to this city before but you have been to The City and it all looks the same, really. The shops maybe have different names, but it's unclear if that is because time has passed and the coral reef of storefronts has grown/exchanged inhabitants or if this is a different place entirely and actually it doesn't matter. Which street you entered from may determine which stores you see, but you are always entering The City.

This place we are going is a hundred yards outside of The City, and looks like it. It is the same 100 yards outside of The City that exists down by my little sister. If the air had tasted a little different, I would have told you for sure I was in North Carolina visiting my sister, not a little bit lost in northwestern Michigan. We park in a little street parking place and look around hesitantly. There's a storefront for a bagel shop. There's a storefront for a local barbeque (local to ME, not this place, or at least I thought that was the case until I looked it up at home.... they don't have a shop local to me. I have eaten there a dozen times, at work, with others. it does not exist near me. this is how The City works though, sometimes you have to accept that). The parking lot is almost empty. The street is vacant. it's quiet. Nothing is happening in this location. The building indicated is unmarked, plain brick. No windows except at the bagel shop and barbeque's storefront windows. They do not have doors of their own, only a set of unmarked, double doors between them.

But, the GPS insists it is here, so we go through those blank doors, and step into an Otherworld. Inside, is a busy marketplace.

The floors are all dark, smooth concrete. Above is all grubby, teal-grey steel and wood, the walls are covered in bright-colored artwork. There are stalls that don't look permanent fashioning the interior into a maze. This is the bible belt of michigan. There's Thai food, sushi, a mochi donut shop. There's a stall devoted to popcorns, both in different flavors but also from specialty kinds of kernels. There's a wall of soda in glass bottles from companies I've never heard of. There were four shelves devoted to black cherry sodas. Floor to ceiling shelves of ginger beer, birch beer, root beer. There's a pastry shop around a corner where I stood and watched someone slicing a cheesecake six inches tall, decorated in strawberries like a painting. We pass a charcuterie shop to reach a wine and cheese bar, which is across from a seafood shop peddling fresh catch from the great lakes, which is next to a deli of local meats, across from a shop exclusively dedicated to seasoning rubs for meat. Tucked into a back corner is a chocolaterie selling bonbons and hand scooped michigan-made ice cream. There's some kind of reunion taking place up at the front of the place. There are old ladies buying popcorn. There's a guy looking at the soda walls, dressed like it's 3am and he couldn't sleep.

The place is packed, but there's hardly any cars in the parking lot so I have to assume people walked here. We dodge people and make it to the sushi counter, where we are greeted by a young woman who has sparkles glittering across the bridge of her nose instead of freckles. She takes our order and welcomes us to sit at the bartop to eat (we don't), and we find a quiet corner to sit and eat. It was the best sushi I've had in my life- the rice was actual sushi rice which is a good start, it was slightly warm still, it was melt-in-your-mouth good. We stopped by the chocolaterie to get a small scoop of ice cream (cashew caramel) and a couple of chocolates to bring home. They're tiny, with local strawberry/cherry fruits, with little things painted on their tops. They were delicious.

My friend took photos of some of the inside of the place. I don't know if she waited for the right moments or what, but there's almost no people in her photos. I cannot express to you enough that this place was FULL. I waited in lines to get food. That's me at the chocolate/ice cream shop counter and there were several people in front of me in line.

There was a second story we didn't make it to, because we had to leave to go get the caging. We exited back to a normal Michigan spring a hundred yards outside The City. The parking lot was mostly empty. The building was plain brick. There was no one on the street. The bagel shop and the barbeque storefronts had no people past the windows. There was no storefront for the sushi shop, because it was in the very heart of the place, it shared no walls with the building walls at all, there was no door to it.

[elisedonut]

I know I've already made a pyramid au post but listen

ok so a few months after the war ends

a 7th year Percy is found in the same pyramid that Fred and George locked him in

and the chaos that would cause for the Weasley's

also maybe just an excuse to think about how a Pre and Post war Percy would interact

[l0gitex]

zzz's

[thedustyleaves]

I’m deeply afraid of playing Horizon myself (don’t like swimming, caves or the ferocity of the machines, I’m a co w a r d) so I’ve watched a walkthrough and Erend is the fucking cutest :’) 

[little-cereal-draws]

Mike is almost always dying.

Almost struck by lightning, got stuck on the roof, fell off a drainpipe, got locked in the safe, got stuck in that inflatable plastic ball (twice), considered jumping out the window, almost was exploded by a landmine, and I’m sure there are a few more im forgetting abt

Alison either never finds out or shows up right at the very end and misses all the real danger. I wonder how much she knows abt what Mike does all day