#netflix please let the gays win

[cadmium-bear]

Looks like Wednesday season 2 is coming soon and I have to remember that wenclair isn’t canon. But I’ve consumed so much wenclair content that I might think it’s canon and I’ll be confused when the actual show resumes. I’d be like “wtf do these boys want now? 😤 can’t they see these two girls are in love with each other?”

Well, that won’t stop us from making fan content 🤣

[infinityinakiss]

okay, i might be completely late to the game (sue me, i didn't think the show about nuns had any gay in it) (i was wrong) (like really wrong), but are you telling me that there is an actual saint named beatrice of silva?! that is actually blowing my mind. did they think "let's fuck with everyone and name beatrice, the badass lesbian nun, after st. beatrice of silva, which is also the last name of our disaster bisexual mc, just to screw with the avatrice shippers"?

what the actual fuck.

and, just as a cherry on the top of this beautiful fucking sundae, beatrice means "she who makes happy", or "bringer of joy."

well she's definitely making one particular person happy. *clears throat* *points to ava in those teaser scenes* *and almost every other interaction she has with beatrice* *and that pic alba posted*

if i'm being queerbaited right now, i will be so fucking mad, because, at this point, i have a manifesto of evidence pertaining to their relationship. if they don't happen, we are storming the netflix building and getting chipotle afterwards.

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Don't you think it's funny cause actual canon gay characters in BL manga will say "I love you" but only the shounen bromance can spew out some of the most romantic shit akin to a 19th century poet writing a letter expressing his surpressed love for his lover 😭.....

Genuniely can't tell if it's bait or not, but I'm going to treat this ask seriously anyway.

Here, have some examples of beautiful and poetic expressions of love in BL media!

I'm going to start with my favourite murder husbands, Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu from Word of Honor/Faraway Wanderers!

This happens in episode nine, less than one third into the story- it's that early, they've known each other for like a week and are already able to tell they're meant to be. They've made their decision to be together, and over the course of the story:

They defend each other multiple times and fight side by side in multiple episodes, sometimes protecting their adopted kid/mentee Chengling as well

Zhou Zishu is willing to go against the whole martial arts society for his boyfriend. With zero hesistation, might I add.

They both know the other has done horrible things (lots of murder on both sides here) and that's not only okay, it's a big part of why they're soulmates and get each other so well!

Zhou Zishu is slowly dying (poisoned nails in his chest, long story) and Wen Kexing can and will risk his life to save him. Don't worry, they get a happy ending both in the show and the novel even if the show's last episode is behind a paywall and Netflix didn't even include it for some reason?

But enough about them, let's move on to the immortal fantasy genre boyfriends Hua Cheng and Xie Lian from Heaven Official's Blessing!

Please note how Hua Cheng is ready to accept Xie Lian in whatever state he's currently in- as a god, a fallen outcast, even grieving and angry and at his absolute lowest. He's stood by Xie Lian in his worst moments, even if at the time Xie Lian had no idea it was him.

Hua Cheng has loved Xie Lian for 800 years, ever since he was a boy Xie Lian saved from falling to his death during a procession.

Xie Lian became a god, then fell due to horrible circumstances, almost committed a war crime against another nation that destroyed his country, spend 800 years wandering the mortal realm as a poor cultivator with his powers greatly reduced, and eventually ascended to become a god again. Throughout it all, Hua Cheng loved him and did his best to help him and then find him.

They're both adorable and the definition of a power couple once they're reunited- no spoilers, but they eventually fight an incredibly powerful god side by side and win & the last scene in the story is them reuniting for good since there's no more obstacles to their immortal love.

Let's move on to my favourite Japanese BL, Our Dining Table (also available as a series that came out semi-recently, but the examples below are from the manga.)

Yutaka is a lonely salesman who meets Minoru, a restaurant worker and his much younger brother Tane grieving the death of their mother.

Yutaka and Minoru hit it off by bonding through food they cook and share. The series is incredibly heartwarming, and as seen above Yutaka becomes a much happier person thanks to both his new relationship and big brother-like bond with little Tane.

As a little bonus, the whole found family together!

This post can't be complete without Golden Stage (or Golden Terrace, as the English official translation calls it).

Fu Shen and Yan Xiaohan aren't even in love at this point! This is at the beginning of the story, when their marriage has just been arranged by the emperor and they're still bitter rivals.

Yan Xiaohan is already protective of his future husband- later on, he also builds him a mansion meant to accommodate his disability (nerve damage in both legs, which requires a wheelchair and/or crutches). They're both incredibly powerful military generals, and the emperor was an idiot thinking an arranged marriage would humiliate them.

Of course they fall in love, of course they're a power couple, of course they send each other letters through trained geese when they're separated during the war, of course they run to each other as fast as they can across a wide cold river when they're finally reunited! Of course they're important to me!

....Aaand how about some Wangxian to wrap up this post? They need no introduction, an absolutely wonderful and complex relationship in a complex fantasy/intrigue story available in several forms - the books, the animated series (as seen above), the live action series, the audio drama, there's so much!

Some of their most beautiful moments:

Lan Wangji writing a song for Wei Wuxian and naming it Wangxian. Years after it's composed, Wei Wuxian plays it and LWJ is able to recognise him even in a different body.

LWJ begs WWX to come with him to Cloud Recesses, to safety, after WWX makes himself an enemy of the whole cultivation world for protecting innocent people.

They confront the final villain together, and work together to expose his crimes. This is also when their final love confession happens, and it's hilarious- in front of everyone's salad, WWX declares he also wanted to sleep with LWJ.

Despite censorship, the animated series was still able to allude to their wedding, showing them in red wedding robes (unfortunately can't find a gif rn)

Respectfully, if you genuinely think BL doesn't have beautiful love confessions and displays of romance, you need to find better BL.

[best-habsburg-monarch]

Maria Theresa, Archduchess of Austria, Queen of Hungary, Croatia and Bohemia, etc. reigned 1740-1780

The empress who reformed the empire while having a ton of children at the same time.

Maximilian , Emperor of Mexico, reign: 1864-1867

The last emperor of Mexico who supported liberal reform against the desires of Mexican conservatives.

Propaganda under the cut:

Maria Theresa:

From anon:

- chucked into ruling at age 23. while pregnant

- no prep!!!! Prussia invades Silesia!!! Ministers fucking around for their own provincial interests instead of for the Whole !!!!! and she has to somehow cope with all of this ....

- ALL WHILE being pregnant with Joseph (II) and we know that guy was just as ornery in utero as he was irl

- she's everything! He (Francis) is just ....Ken.

- YAS QUEEN rediversify that gene pool

- originally reluctant to participate in the 1st partition of poland (who wants galicia let's be real)

Maximilian

From: anon

- He loved plants

- He was a sassy man

- He had good taste

- He learned Nahuatl

- He’s cute (I mean look at him)

- He said “gay rights”

- He banned child labour in Mexico

- He gave many rights back to indigenous people

- Bro was wronged by France (haven’t we all?)

- He’s baby

- Got executed, come on, give him this guys 🥺

- He loved to design gardens and collect insects which makes me think he would've loved playing animal crossing

- An outspoken liberal in a period where the monarchy was still quite conservative.

- Vice-Admiral of the Navy who initiated scientific projects and exploration.

- Aesthetic girlie. Collected flowers, painted, wrote poetry, and kept a journal. He would have loved Tumblr.

- (Probably) gay or bisexual.

- Allegedly slapped Franz Joseph for refusing to allow Lombardy to have an elective body.

- Sisi's favorite brother-in-law (and not in a romantic way, fuck you Netflix)

- Refused to take the Mexican crown until a plebiscite had been held because he wanted to be invited by the Mexican people.

- Gave up all of his Austrian titles to go to Mexico because he believed he had made a promise to them.

- Also, his wife was amazing and capable and the amount of pure misogyny that certain historians and biographers have thrown at her is ridiculous. I know this isn't a Carlota poll, but she'd want Max to win.

- Netflix did him unbelievably dirty. Please give him this.

Did you know my man Max repatriated many pieces of Mexica artefacts?

He told Austria to cough up 3 main things that he thought were rightfully Mexican.

1. The Chimalli

2. A codex

3. A letter from Cortez to the chocolate man people seem to call Charles

The Austrians took their time but eventually gave back something

The Chimalli next to max so people know who to thank for it

[saltygilmores]

Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls 2/16, There’s The Rub, The Part Where Paris and Rory Are SuperMegaGay And All Is Right With The World Again, Part 6

Paris just saved Rory's hide from the wrath of Dean (okay, she still got plenty of wrath from Dean, unfortunately, but it could have been a lot worse) and this is why Paris is my favorite Boyfriend, not Jess.

You can read parts 1-5 and all previous episodes here.

Omg, my cynical, cold, black heart can't take this tenderness. I love them so much. Long live PariMore! (finally thought of a ship name! woot!)

One of the most serious crimes commited by one miss AmyShermanPalladino in writing a Year in the Life is not taking advantage of the freedom of Netflix and the much more progressive year of 2016 by having Paris get a divorce at the same time that Rory is lost and adrift in her life and finally put these two idiots together. But no. They still didn't find each other and live happily ever after and Rory is still shacking up with Logan even when it's clear that neither Paris or Rory actually like men.

By golly. This is 2002, they said. It can't be done, they said. And yet, PariMore proved us wrong. They went super duper ultra mega gay. Netflix and Chill gay. Slumber party gay. Super Gay Fanfiction!

"Sort of."

Staaaaaaaaahpppppp!! 😭 We interrupt Super Duper Gay Lesbian Slumber Party and cut to Lorelai and Emily having a night on the town after their spa day. They meet a handsome older gentleman at the bar who offers a dance to Emily. In a shocking turn of events that further proves this episode comes from some alternate dimension where all is right with the world with the exception of Dean Forrester, Lorleai happily becomes her mother's wingwoman after some small initial resistance. Are you ok, Lorelai? Do you feel feverish? You haven't nagged, cockblocked, offered unsolicited advice, or butted into anyone's business in like, a whole 30 minutes. This episode has such great Lorelai and Emily banter, like Emily telling Lorelai "You let me get 60/40'd" and "Hookers eat at bars." "Only if they can't get a table." Terrific! But the handsome gentleman gets a little too close, Emily feels guilty about dancing with him and that puts the kibosh on that and Emily blames Lorelai for making her feel like a cheap floozy. Geez Lorelai, I guess you can't win. You're insufferable when you're being a cockblocking menace to society, but then when you actually do relax a little bit and alllow people do as they please, you get the business. Emily wonders why she can't have what Rory and Lorelai have and I don't know if a deeply fucked up mother daughter relationship forged from a teen pregnancy where the 34 year old mother is still about 15 maturity wise is something you want to aspire to. Rory reading the check in forms at her therapist's office 5 years from now: Form: "Reason for appointment?" Rory: "Hmmm..." Lorelai to Emily at the hotel: Rory and I are best friends, Mom. Best friends first, and mother and daughter second! (Rory in her therapist's office: "Ah. There it is.")

There are so many times Lorelai is this - close to having a breakthrough, where she exhibits a fleeting moment of self awareness then poof, it is gone. She didn't pause to think about the implications behind admitting "I'm my daughter's friend before her mother." She will never learn or grow or change. Oh well, that's our Lorelai!

Listen, stop the feuding, you both get a trophy for Sucking At Parenting. Is there any hope for Rory's spawn to break this generational curse? It would be interesting if Rory's future child turned out to be a boy, because like, I have to wonder what creative and different ways she could manage to fuck up a son? (as with everything I'm sure this exists as a work of fanfiction somewhere). Lorelai thinks spending a whole weekend with her mother was too intense and they should have started with something smaller to patch their relationship and grow closer. What is her idea? No, not therapy. Petty theft. They steal the robes from their hotel room. Yay, mother and daughter bonding and not healing any trauma whatsoever!

No, never. Only if it's a box of cornstarch, a boat, or another woman's husband. Emily enjoys the robe stealing caper, some sarcastic quips are exchanged, and the desperate, aching, deep seated emotional trauma being suffered by both parties is once again shoved down deep deep inside to fester like an infected wound.

She's totally fine you guys. We cut to Rory and Lorelai at the diner the next day where Rory is giving Lorelai the run down of the previous events, presumably minus the super duper mega gay sexual tension between herself and Paris. Lorelai remarks that Paris looked nauseous and tired when she woke up in the morning, which Rory attributes to a sugar overload, but we know better. We know how dehydrating all-night Blockbuster & Chill lesbian makeout slumber parties can be.

Oh right, Rory committed the felony of spending one evening with someone other than Dean so now she "owes" him her time. She is talking about it with a level of excitement in her voice akin to someone who was just asked to scrub a toilet. Of course, there could not be a mention of Dean without a deeply troubling response from Lorelai. They go together like peanut butter and jelly. Surely it will be something like, “Aw honey, he just yelled at you because he loves you” or something.

Eh, close enough.

BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! It gets worse! There's only a minute left in the episode! How does she do it, folks? She is truly breathtaking. Before we get there, let's enjoy some Literati bliss. Rory is catching on that the whole Food Delivery thing may have been a ruse from Jess to get all up in her bizzzness and almost pries the truth out of Luke, but Jess diverts Luke away from the scene. Jess and Rory then enjoy an incredibly rare, blissful moment together, free of interruptions, alone at the counter. Or so they think.

Sorry I almost called you a naive woodland fairy when I thought you still didn't get that Luke never actually told Jess to bring to food your house and USA here cooked up the whole scheme on his own. It's clearly Jess who's the naive one if he thinks you're actually going to pay for your food! Ha ha!

WAAAAATTT???!!! #AlternateDimensionEpisode #EpisodeFromOuterSpace #TheOneWhereTheGilmoresPayForTheirFood #IsAmyShermanPalladinoOK?

SOMEONE (two someones) are not happy about this budding, adorable relationship, one so stinking cute that you'd have to be sick to try to destroy it. Like someone who would try to stop a bunny and a puppy from cuddling. Gee, wonder who I'm talking about?

Just normal Butthead Business, staring into windows while people are trying to eat. We already know from prior Window-Peeping episodes this doesn't bother Lorelai in the least. Lorelai smiles sweetly at her ShnookyUkkums Dean as if 30 seconds ago she wasn't hearing a story from her daughter about his anger issues for the 400th time. He's also talking in his usual miserable serial killer monotone about "Spending the day with Rory" like he'd rather be sticking his arm into heavy machinery than spend time with her, and again I have to wonder why he is even bothering with her, other than the fact that she's an easy victim and that no other humanoid woman besides Lorelai would ever give this soggy cornflake the time of the day. L: Rory told me everything that happened last night. She feels terrible about it. You shouldn't feel bad. It was a "Freaky unfortunate thing that happens." She continues in her soft, flirty, gentle Talking to Dean voice, "It had nothing to do with Jess coming over, trust me, she did not want him there!" Um. Again, a very weird thing to say about Some Kid to the guy your daughter is dating? Thanks to one of my followers who pointed out that Rory never said this on camera which means Lorelai has now resorted to flat out lying to Dean in order to sabotage her daughter's friendship (and it's still only a friendship) with Jess.

Look alive Butthead. She's salivating. I think she's about to start humping your leg right there in front of Luke's Diner. Don't make me turn the garden hose on you Lorelai. Dean isn't listening or aware he's about to be humped. He's distracted. There's something he's incredibly concerned about. Rory and Jess....they're talking. To each other. In public. Now, Gilmore Girls knows how to do creepy. We've got plenty of stories of people stalking, eavesdropping, hiding in bushes, leaving excessive amounts of messages, Dean existing, yada yada. But this is easily one of the creepiest things to ever happen on this show. It seriously gives me the chilly willies. The eeby jeebies. The eepy creepies. They look like two villains who have joined evil forces to devestate....Lorelai's own freaking daughter.

Picture ID: Lorelai and Dean watching Rory and Jess have an innocent conversation creepily through a window, cementing their status as the villains in this wholesome drama known as Gilmore Girls. *deep shudder*

[thundergrace]

[...]

There are, in fact, two main narratives here, and they’re given equal footing. In one, there’s Carson Shaw (Jacobson) and the Rockford Peaches. During tryouts in the first episode, Max Chapman (Chanté Adams) arrives with her best friend Clance (Gbemisola Ikumelo) for support, but they’re promptly turned away because they’re Black. Here, the story becomes bifurcated.

But A League of Their Own doesn’t feel like two separate shows unspooling at once. These narratives are like the offense and the defense, both essential components of the same game. The two storylines often touch, sometimes in more abstract thematic ways, and sometimes more explicitly. The Rockford Peaches don’t let Max in, but A League of Their Own ensures she takes up space in the narrative, her own wins and losses playing out alongside the team’s.

[...]

In addition to acknowledging the racism of the league, A League of Their Own also expands its narrative to include the historical realities of queer players. Thirty years after the original, this story finally gets to be as gay as it should be. Whatever queer subtext pinged for the baby gays of the 80s and 90s moves into bold fucking text here. There are so many queer characters. Almost everyone! Is queer!

Read the entire article, please. You really really wanna read the whole thing. I just wanted to highlight my own needed assurances that Max is a main MAIN character and not a side character. She's the deuteragonist. I'm excited.

Also, I was reminded of A Secret Love. The Netflix documentary about a AAGPBL player and her life partner. Might be worth checking out if you've never seen it while waiting for ALoTO to drop!

[gleekto]

Klaine Advent 2022: Chemistry Sucks (8/?)

Summary: Nerd!Kurt/ Popular!Blaine high school AU - Kurt joins Glee club in his junior year to please his dad, though he’d rather just hide out in the library until he can graduate and get out of Lima.

Turns out he’s not the only gay kid in town. Too bad the other out gay kid is cocky and popular senior, Blaine Anderson. Sure of himself, gets all the solos, things served to him on a platter. Kurt finds him shallow and infuriating.

Blaine finds Kurt square and irritating.

Yet at a party one night, they promise to sleep together if they don’t have other opportunities by the end of the year. A dare. Naturally competitive spirits.

Day 1, Day 2,Day 3, Day 4, Day 5, Day 6, Day 7

Chemistry Sucks (Day 8: Thunder)

"Are you sure you wanna go tonight? I'm really not sure about driving to Westerville-"

"Because of the rain?" Blaine has that unpleasant feeling that Kurt is about to cancel on their arrangement to drive to the LGBT youth group tonight. He had planned to go before he even got into this bet thing with Kurt, but it just seemed so much easier with a friend. Which Blaine begrudgingly realizes they are at this stage, competitiveness and all. "It's not that bad out right now," Blaine peers out the window. "So just come by and we can figure it out."

Unfortunately, by the time Kurt arrives, there is a full on thunderstorm outside. When Blaine opens the door, Kurt is standing amidst the sheets of rain, in perfectly tight jeans and some inexplicable cat t-shirt that is somehow both outrageous and fashionable, and holding his jacket up to protect his perfectly coiffed hair from the bucketing drops. "You seriously think we should drive in this?" Kurt says the moment he opens the door.

Blaine sighs as a flash of lightning momentarily blinds him. "Just come in."

Kurt closes the door behind him. "So?"

"I just wanted to go," Blaine shrugs. "Gay guys. Our own age," Blaine says for emphasis. "I guess that it's not the smartest thing to drive in this but you're here already and I'm not going to send you driving home alone in this storm." Blaine looks down shaking his head.

"We'll do it next month. Tonight let's just watch a movie here instead?" Kurt says. Blaine stops shaking his head but doesn't look up yet. He suddenly feels a lot less disappointed. He's been wanting to watch that Bros movie on Netflix anyways and who better to watch it with.

He hides his smile, going for neutral instead. "Okay deal. As long as you promise to go with me next time." They walk towards Blaine's TV room.

"How else am I going to avoid sleeping with you?" Kurt says sheepishly.

"Ha, so maybe that's what this is about. Maybe you don't want to. Sabotaging any chance we might have to meet the right guy?" Blaine feels his heart race just thinking about all this. It really is time for him to meet someone - teenage hormones with no teenage romance is not fun at all.

"What? In the hopes of scoring a hot night with our leading man when we're done nationals?" Kurt is shaking his head and his eyes are twinkling. Unfortunately cute.

"When we win nationals," Blaine interrupts.

"That sure would be a sweet victory for you, wouldn't it?" Kurt is all confidence now as they grab some sodas for the movie.

"Winning nationals? yes," Blaine deflects and Kurt rolls his eyes. "You would just be the cherry on top."

[shunshuntaiga]

Okay so, thoughts on Half Bad: the Bastard son and the Devil Himself as a book fan.

Mind you, it's been years since I read the books so the details are a little foggy through my goldfish memory. This will contain spoilers.

Overall, enjoyable. It's so different from the source material that it's hard to compare the two properly, because even the characters are different from how they are in the books. I hope they continue into a season 2 because I'd like to see where they take the book two story of Nathan learning to control his powers (please please please, give me the shared trance sequence with Gabriel god yes please)

Nathan:

In the books his mental health is a very important part of the story, he's depressed, he's been abused his whole life, and it affected how he interacted with the world as a whole. In the show he's still the Nathan from the books, but as if he'd grown up happy with no mental health problems.

They really toned down this aspect of the show. Giving him a loving grandmother, and friends, and a life outside of being a blood witch.

It made his relationship with Annalise in the books more dependent on her, because he'd never *had* someone who cared.

BTW Annalise? HATED HER. In the books at least, they really did a 180 on her personality in the show. They made her defend him which I appreciated, because in the books she never once fought for him (at least that I can remember) and he still adored her even when she was actively letting her brother(s) abuse him.

I don't believe her gift was Undoing as well. I think is was akin to mind control of some kind? (As I said, foggy on details. But I noticed they changed A LOT of people's powers for the sake of excitement)

She also didn't join him after his escape in the books. That was all Nathan and Gabriel for the longest time, and she only reappeared when her family wanted her to go manipulate him.

Gabriel:

A difficult one. His personality is so different from the books he's basically a different character all together. I still like him, but I miss my soft spoken boy who was more than willing to sit with Nathan's volatile moods.

I do like how Annalise and Gabriel start out hating each other (they hate each other in the books, Gabriel with good reason to) but the fact that they become friends, united in their love for Nathan is really nice.

Also I don't know how they managed to make a show that feels like I'm being queer baited SO HARD with their relationship, seeing as Nathan distinctly chooses Gabriel in the books, but hats off netflix you've done it.

SPOILER

As much as I like an Ot3, I'm not sure how I feel about the Nathan/Annalise/Gabriel thrupple deal they've got working. It feels like they're going to ignore Annalise's emotional manipulation and betrayal of Nathan because they afraid to make the main character "fully gay" (I know he's bi, but he does fall out of love with Annalise and in love with Gabriel and I'm sentimental about that because it was the first queer MAIN character I had ever seen.)

BIG POTENTIAL SPOILER

I have hope for the show NOT killing Gabriel because in the finale *they did his death sequence*. In the book he gets shot while trying to escape hunters with Nathan, and it's slightly Nathan's fault (due to gifts that I don't remember exactly) and Nathan becomes so depressed by his death that nothing matters to him, even after they win the war, that he becomes a hermit in the wild and eventually, using the transformation powers he inherets from his father, turns into a tree, which is irreversible.

He can't lice without his lover and it's the saddest thing.

SLEEPING OUTSIDE:

Okay, so slightly disappointed they changed this bit, but in the books blood witches are categorized by their fear of being trapped indoors at night time. So they sleep outside in the open air.

I understand they changed this because it would have been more difficult to film and it's unimportant. But CELIA DIDNT JUST PUT HIM OUTSIDE IN A CAGE TO BE NEEDLESSLY CRUEL. Yes. The cage is cruel, they glossed over many details of his actual time in her care because it was honestly awful, but being outside was for his own safety because blood witches trapped indoors at night loose their minds.

I also kind of wish they spent less time focusing on his sister and built up the relationship between Celia and Nathan. Because they had a special, weird bond in the books.

I did enjoy the show as a whole, and if they make more, I will watch more. But yeah, I have a lot of thoughts because I really loved these books when I read them.

[newagesispage]

                                                                             AUGUST 2022  

                                                                             The Rib Page

Please let Richard Thomas win an Emmy for his work on Ozark when 2023 rolls around!!!!!!

*****

Cindy and Kate and Fred are hitting the road one more time! The B-52's are on tour!

*****

There are so many crimes that the media revisits every year. They never seem to reinvestigate the Jimmy Hoffa case.

*****

Marcia Gay Harden and Neil Patrick Harris are in uncoupled. Keep an eye on Model, Painter Jordyn Owens.

*****

Kirsten Dunst and Jesse Plemons got married!** Kris Keach married Miso.** Lopez became an Affleck.** Anya Taylor-Joy wed Malcolm McRae

*****

Check out The Lost Weekend: A Love Story

*****

The house passed a record-high $840 billion military budget, the same amount as all the stimulus checks combined. ** Huh, guess when they print money for people, it’s socialist, but when they do it for military contractors it’s bipartisan. - Dan Price

*****

The 2022 medal of freedom recipients are Simone Biles, Siter Simone Campbell, Julieta Garcia, Gabrielle Giffords, Fred Gray, Steve Jobs, Khizr Khan, Father Alexander Karloutsos, Sandra Lindsay, John McCain, Diane Nash, Megan Rapinoe, Alan Simpson, Richard Trumka, Wilma Vaught, Denzel Washington and Rauly Zaguirre.

*****

Watch for Downtown Owl with Lily Rabe, Ed Harris and Finn Wittrock.

*****

Jim Thorpe had his Olympic Gold reinstated and it’s about time!

*****

Christopher Bell won a race this year! Woo Hoo!!!

*****

Did Ivanka Trump have an abortion? Is it our business?

*****

Check out the Newman/ Woodward doc from Ethan Hawke!!

*****

The Talisman is coming to Netflix.

*****

Brittney Griner has pled guilty to drug possession in Russia.

*****

J.B. Pritzker was on the South Lawn at the WH for the signing of a Bill that will toughen requirements for young people, deny firearms to more domestic abusers and help get guns out of the hands of dangerous people.

*****

I think Michael Flynn could very well be on the VP short list. And if the President doesn’t run, I strongly believe Mike is running. - Steve Bannon** Milwaukee will be the host for the 2024 Republican National Convention.

*****

There has been intense ‘random’ tax audits of James Comey and Andrew McCabe that started with the Trump administration.

*****

Liza O’Brien has her own podcast. ** Conan and Bowen Yang have joined the cast of a movie brought to us by Ben Marshall, John Higgens and Martin Herlihy AKA Please don’t destroy.

*****

Shawn Mendes has cancelled his tour for mental health reasons.

*****

Can’t wait for Starbright, a film starring Ted Levine, Elizabeth Rohm and Gary Grubbs.

*****

Days alert: Beyond Salen: Chapter 2 came out this month. Wow!! They pulled out the old Prism story. Ok, it is kind of silly but OMG: Larry Welch, Megan Hathaway Dimera, Andrew Donovan, Thomas Banks and a new Shin named Wendy!!!!!!! I am sure that huge Bo and Hope fans are just in heaven just as their heroes are. Please bring Andrew and Paul to Salem!!!!! This could give Theresa a reason to come back to break up Chloe and Brady! For years, I have been wondering if we would ever hear from Andrew. Finally!!** By the way, More JJ!!!!! And speaking of JJ, portrayer Casey Moss is engaged to True O’Brien who used to play his love Paige!!!AWWWWW!!** Wally Kurth, Eric Martsolf, Carson Boatman and Brandon Barash have put a band together called Day Players!!** Richard Wharton will take over the role of Dr. Rolf that was previously played by William Utay ,who was unavailable.

*****

American Horror Stories is back on July 21 with Denis O’Hare, Gabourey Sidibe, Cody Fern, Alicia Silverstone and Judith Light.

*****

Let’s give attention to the first US woman aviator: Bessica Reicht. How do some things get swallowed up by history??

*****

Robert Downey Jr. Has apparently paid for Armie Hammer’s rehab stint. Hammer has been accused of rape.** Ricky Martin’s nephew, Dennis Sanchez has an order of protection against the singer. He claims that he and Martin had a sexual relationship and they were together for 7 months and now Martin is harassing him. Martin denies all allegations and blames the mental health issues of his nephew. ** Martin is also being sued by his former manager, Rebecca Drucker for unpaid commissions. ** By the end of July, Martin’s nephew withdrew the charges.

*****

Sona Movsesian has a book out, The World’s worst assistant. Conan did the forward.

*****

Say what you will about Showtime’s The First Lady but Michelle Pfeiffer was really great as Betty Ford!

*****

The big ego of Joe Manchin has left him unable to keep supporting the climate change bill.

*****

Beanie Feldstein has quit the Funny Girl production on Broadway. She will be leaving even sooner than first announced. She also now has tonsilitis. Lea Michelle will take over.

*****

There is a siracha shortage!!

*****

There has been a rise in vasectomies.

*****

Don Henley’s handwritten stolen Hotel California lyrics have been found after decades.  

*****

Jeremy Mayfield was on Dale Jr’s Download podcast talking about the mafia type tactics that Nascar uses. He claims that a raid on his house and other punishments were heaped upon him. He has corroborating evidence from others.

*****

Check out Sandyhookpromise.org.

*****

You know, the flack about Trump and his daughter, Ivanka is strange. To me, it isn’t strange because there may be something wacky going on, because that is probably not true. The thing that always hit me is that back in the day I think he was giving her his endorsement or something. A man with an ego like that probably thought that the best thing he could give his daughter was his seal of approval on her looks et al. JS** The last of the summer Jan. 6 hearings was repetitive but was proof positive that Trump is a traitor. The committee was able to prove that although seemingly inactive thru the entire Jan. 6 ordeal, the President was active in the failed coup attempt by trying to influence senators and the targeting of Pence. There were no photos allowed of him in the 187 minutes. ** Bannon was convicted for failing to show up for a congressional hearing.

*****

Kid Rock kicked off his current tour with a video from Trump. In July’s North Dakota’s state fair, Rock had to cancel due to weather concerns and fans trashed the place.

*****

I loved Bob Costa’s interview with Kamala Harris but she does not seem as self -assured as she did thru the campaign.

*****

Mo. GOP Rep. Tricia Derges was found guilty of wire fraud, illegal distribution of controlled substances and lying to Feds. ** Why do these candidates keep talking about faith? This is America, it should not matter! ** Kendall Co. Republicans in Illinois are raffling off a Smith and Wesson semi-automatic very similar to the one used in the Highland Park shooting. They are not the first county to think of this either!

*****

Will Julia Garner play Madonna in the biopic?? Word is that the Madonna directed film wants her.

*****

Let’s get real!! Why do women deserve less rights than men? Have we started charging men for child support while baby is in the womb?? Let’s get on it if that is the way the country is going.

*****

Bradley Cooper is dating Huma Abedin, Hillary’s chief of staff. They were reportedly introduced by Anna Wintour.

*****

Ginni Thomas paid for buses to bring insurrectionists to Washington.

*****

The Emmy noms have been announced.  The hardest category has to be Drama series: I mean, honestly, how do you pick between Better Call Saul, Ozark or Succession (the leader with 25 nods)? Ok, there are other good shows too but c’mon!! The comedy category is great too with Hacks, Barry, Curb your enthusiasm, Abbott Elementary, Only Murders in the Building and the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. The actors face stiff competition with leads like Donald Glover, Bill Hader, Steve Martin, Martin Short, Rachel Brosnahan, Qinta Brunson, Jean Smart, Issa Rae, Jason Bateman, Brian Cox, Jeremy Strong, Bob Odenkirk, Laura Linney, Jodie Comer and Sandra Oh. Supporting role nominees include Anthony Carrigan, Tony Shalhoub, Bowen Yang, Henry Winkler, Tyler James Williams, Alex Borstein, Sheryl Lee Ralph, Kieran Culkin, Nicholas Braun, Chris Walken, Matt Macfadyen, Patricia Arquette, Rhea Seehorn, J. Smith Cameron and Julia Garner. Ok, that supporting dramatic actress thing is a tough one too. Guest actors include James Cromwell and Tom Pelphrey. Tom’s other half, Kaley Cuoko is also nominated this year. Rhea Seehorn is also nominated for Cooper’s Bar and Julia Garner gets a second nod for Inventing Anna. Voice over work that has been honored comes from Julie Andrews, Chadwick Boseman, Maya Rudolph and Jessica Walter. The narrator category is full with Barack Obama, Lupita Nyongo, W. Kamau Bell, Kareem Abdul Jabar and David Attenborough. There is also some love for Michael Keaton, Sebastian Stan, Lily James, Sarah Paulson, Mare Winningham, Jennifer Coolidge, The Randy Rainbow Show, Late Night with Seth Meyers, McCartney 3,2,1, Andy Warhol Diaries, My next guest needs no introduction with Letterman and Norm Macdonald: Nothing Special.

Clint Eastwood won a 2nd lawsuit against online marketers. There are more lawsuits to come!

*****

D. Bailey, the Gubernatorial candidate for Il. Governor had a quote after the Oakland Parade shooting: “Let’s move on and celebrate the independence of this nation.”

*****

Boris Johnson resigned as Prime Minister in the UK. Best headline: CLOWNFALL!

*****

The DEA has made the biggest bust of its kind in California. Found were 1 million pills with Fentanyl that are linked to the Cartel.

*****

Joanne Lumley is a dame!!

*****

A woman was ticketed for driving alone in the HOV Lane. She is pregnant and told the police that her unborn child counts as a passenger since Roe was overturned. The State can’t have it both ways.

*****

Brendan Fraser will stun us in the Whale with Sadie Sink. ** Look for him in Killers of the Flower Moon as well. In an interview, he seemed nervous and excited to be working with Leo and Marty. Does he realize he is on equal footing with them? His talent has blown me away (Gods and Monsters, anyone) so I am sure that he will not disappoint! ** Scorsese will direct DiCaprio in The Wager.

*****

Mehmet Oz and his wife’s family paid a $95 mil fine for hiring thousands of illegal immigrants in Pa. The other guy running, John Fetterman’s wife created a free store serving 20,000 families a year. They also have a food rescue serving over 25 million pounds of food for those in need in Pa.

*****

The new Kennedy Center honorees have been announced: George Clooney, Gladys Knight, U2, Amy Grant and Tania Leon. The program will air on Dec. 4.

*****

There will be a Stranger Things spinoff from Upside down pictures.

*****

Full Frontal with Samantha Bee was canceled.

*****

Yamiche Alcindor is the latest recipient of the Zenger award for journalists who fights for freedom of the press and the people’s right to know.

*****

Did we all see the self- congratulatory fist bumps between Republicans after they blocked a bill to help toxin-exposed vets survive. ** Republicans haven’t met a veteran they won’t screw over.  - Jon Stewart

*****

Pa. Gov. Hopeful Doug Mastriano has aligned himself with GAB and founder Andrew Torba. Torba, a spouter of the big lie said, “My policy is not to conduct interviews with reporters who aren’t Christian and Doug, he does not talk to these people. They are dishonest. They’re liars. They’re a den of vipers, they want to destroy you.”

*****

I have railed here about this before and now have seen Colbert joke about his money and fame. Why do they think this is funny with all the poverty around them. We get it, you are rich and powerful, why do you want to keep reminding us of this?

*****

The black and white episode of Better Call Saul was awesome! Carol Burnett will win the Emmy next year for guest star, I am sure of it!

*****

What a sad day to hear about the death of Bob Rafelson. Check out the obit in the Hollywood Reporter because it tells all. The Monkees and Easy Rider shaped so much of my life. I will miss our tremendous talent.

*****

R.I.P. James Caan, Shin Zo Abe, Clifford Alexander Jr., the latest shooting victims, Peter Brook, Larry Storch, Adam Wade, L.Q. Jones, Vernon Winfrey, Tony Sirico, Jak Knight, Ivana Trump, Monty Norman, William Hart, Rebecca Balding, Tanya Kersey, David Warner, Shonka Dukureh, Tony Dow, Mable Haddock, Paul Sorvino, Bill Russell, Nichelle Nichols, Ophie Brook and Bob Rafelson.

[teddy-stonehill]

hey any gay movie recommendations for a bunch of idiot queer babies in need of gay shit to entertain us

Absolutely! I'll even break them down by streaming service so you can figure out which are available to you.

Netflix

Cloudburst (2011): Road trip romcom about a couple of older lesbians running away to Canada to get married and picking up a hot young hitchhiker on the way. Bittersweet ending but absolutely worth the ride. One of my all time favorite movies.

Dear Ex (2018): A Taiwanese movie about grief and family. After his father's death, a young boy gets to know his dead father's male lover and learns about what their relationship had been like. Incredibly moving. Please watch it.

Alice Junior (2019): A Brazillian movie about a trans girl moving to a new high school. Trigger warning for some intense scenes of transphobia, but overall it's a really fun and heartwarming coming of age film.

Hulu

Breaking Fast (2020): A Ramadan holiday romcom. Very fun and feel-good, and I really appreciate how it explores the different ways that gay people come to terms with the religions they were raised with.

Bound (1996): Extremely sexy and stylish lesbian mob thriller. One of the Wachowskis' early films. Just incredible on every level. This movie deserves to be way more well-known than it is.

Wild Nights with Emily (2018): Extremely fun and funny biopic about Emily Dickinson. It has a lot of laugh-out-loud moments but also makes a really moving point about how people's lives are erased and flattened through the retelling of history. I'm not sure a lot of people liked this movie as much as I did, so your mileage may very, but I really loved it.

Amazon Prime

The Donald Strachey Mysteries: This is actually a series of four movies that all follow various episodes in the life of Donald Strachey, a gay private eye. Based on a series of books which began being published in the late 70s. These movies have the feel of a fun low-budget made-for-tv mystery, so if you enjoy that kind of thing, you'll love these movies. In order they're: Third Man Out; Shock to the System; On the Other Hand, Death; Ice Blues

Uncle Frank (2020): A moving family drama set in the 70s about a gay man returning home for his father's funeral. Has a lot of dark moments, but a happy ending, and a really sweet gay couple at the center.

Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan (2020): Extremely fun gay Bollywood romcom about a man and his boyfriend going to his parents house for his cousin's wedding. I really can't recommend this one enough.

HBO Max

Unpregnant (2020): I've watched a lot of gay bro comedies and this one is by far my favorite. It's like Booksmart if Booksmart was good. It's about two teenage girls going on a cross-country road trip so that one of them can get an abortion. They get in a lot of zany hijinks along the way. Please watch it.

Desert Hearts (1985): Essentially a classic lesbian pulp novel but with a happy ending. One of the earliest mainstream movies to be both openly gay and have a happy (if a bit ambiguous) ending. Plus it's just a genuinely compelling story with some good characters.

Tubi TV

Keep in mind Tubi is 100% free even without a subscription and it has a huge LGBT section so it's a great resource for gay films! It's movies aren't really sorted in any sort of order, though, so it can be a bit daunting to try to find anything on there if you don't already have something in mind.

That said, here's some diamonds in the rough I've already dug out for you:

Ideal Home (2018): This movie stars Paul Rudd and Steve Coogan as a rich asshole gay couple who unexpectedly have to adopt a child. It's very sort of mean-spirited humor for a lot of it but also it's got a surprising amount of heart at it's center and... it's one of my main comfort movies at this point lmao.

An Almost Ordinary Summer (2019): A movie about two older Italian men getting married. Their families are opposed at first and most of the film is focused on winning them over. Also one of my main comfort movies lol

Big Eden (2000): A really sweet gay romcom about a New York artist going back to his hometown in Montana and finding love and community there.

If you're willing to pay for stuff

Unfortunately not all of my favorite movies are currently streaming anywhere, but if you're willing/able to pay to rent or buy good movies, I recommend these ones:

Nina's Heavenly Delights (2006): A delightful lesbian romcom about a woman who returns to her home in Scotland for her father's funeral and ends up trying to win a curry cooking contest to keep her family's restaurant alive. I watched this movie on my first virtual date with my now girlfriend, and she said it was her best first date ever, so... <3

Shelter (2007): Gay surfer film. Also a lot about family and self-acceptance and learning to find a healthy balance between taking care of yourself and being there for others. Great soundtrack. Beautiful cinematography. Once when I was having a hard time I watched this movie every night for like a week straight.

Four More Years (2010): An absolutely hilarious Swedish gay romcom about two politicians from opposing parties falling in love. Another one about older gays (which I always appreciate) and it's one of the most genuinely funny gay romcoms out there.

Okay, I'll put a stop to it there. But if you want to send me any follow-up recommendation requests with more specifics about what kind of movies you want to watch I'm always happy to try to give more personalized recommendations as well. Also feel free to let me know if you have any follow-up questions about any of the movies featured here.

[wellhalesbells]

✨✨ TOP FIVES FOR 2020 ✨✨

2020 was, i think we can all agree, a massively chaotic year but i have never consumed as much media before in my life, so i thought others might benefit from my slothery uh, connoisseur.... ship?  yes, that.  below are the books, comics, shows, and movies that got me through!

B O O K S .

the starless sea, by erin morgenstern - i loooove this book because it loves me back.  it says: ‘oh, you’re a reader, well i have just the thing for you.’  it luxuriates in language and story and riddles and fairy tales and it feels like an entire library in a single tome.

they never learn, by layne fargo - oh fuuuuuck, this was satisfying.  i thought it might feel a little exploitative as it is very aware of the zeitgeist and likely would not exist without the #metoo movement but it never ever did.  this was a fucking ROMP, period.  reading about a woman getting away with murdering skeezy guy after rapey guy after shitty human just made me happier and happier.

moonflower murders, by anthony horowitz - this is the second in the susan ryeland series (and the first was hardcore good fun too) and really feels very classic mystery with the artful twist of catering to the literary community.  mainly because: susan isn’t a detective, she’s an editor and she gets drafted in this time because the clue to what happened to a missing woman is in a book she edited, if she can find it.  both of the books in this series have such an excellent coming together moment that is rare af to find.

the invisible life of addie larue, by v.e. schwab - the writing in this is just so good.  it has that feel to me where i just want to drop the book and open up my own page and let my fingers fly.  it’s that inspiring kind of writing that reminds you of all the things language can do.

crown of feathers/heart of flames, by nicki pau preto - aaahhh, this series is SO FREAKING GOOD!  why is there not more of a fandom for it, why???? it is so many of my favorite tropes all resting perfectly together to the point where you almost forget they’re tropes because they just so naturally evolved there.  ugh, it’s just.... it’s so heart-bursty good.

.... number 5, part 2?  raybearer, by jordan ifueko - this was just so original and i was invested af.  like, what a brilliant idea though and an even better execution??  i loved every character and am so looking forward to the next in the series so i can get to know them even better!!

honorable mentions (sh*t i still liked a whole heckuva lot): you/hidden bodies, by caroline kepnes // writers & lovers, by lily king // i’ll be gone in the dark, by michelle mcnamara // the faceless old woman who secretly lives in your home, by joseph fink & jeffrey cranor // girl, serpent, thorn, by melissa bashardoust // a little life, by hanya yanagihara // the guinevere deception, by kiersten white // obsidio (and the entire illuminae series), by amie kaufman & jay kristoff // the bone houses, by emily lloyd-jones // house of salt and sorrows, by erin a. craig // we hunt the flame, by hafsah faizal // savage legion, by matt wallace // blacktop wasteland, by s.a. cosby // crier’s war, by nina varela // the empress of salt and fortune/when the tiger came down the mountain, by nghi vo // upright women wanted, by sarah gailey // the monster of elendhaven, by jennifer giesbrecht // a deadly education, by naomi novik // you let me in, by camilla bruce // when you ask me where i’m going, by jasmin kaur // the lights go out in lychford/last stand in lychford (and the entire lychford series), by paul cornell // the devil and the dark water, by stuart turton // serpent & dove, by shelby mahurin // one by one, by ruth ware // ruthless gods (this was SUCH an upshot from the first book - it’s worth sticking with if you’re on the fence), by emily a. duncan // cemetery boys, by aiden thomas // the inheritance games, by jennifer lynn barnes // the fortunate ones (2021 release), by ed tarkington

C O M I C S .

cosmoknights, by hannah templer - the art was gorgeous, the gayness was glorious, and just.... hot HOOOOOOOOT lady knights in space?!  a princess winning her own hand?  find something not to love in there, i dare you.

don’t go without me, by rosemary valero-o’connell - wow. wow wow wow wow wow.  the writing was stunning, so lyrical and atmospheric and deep, and rosemary has to be one of my favorite artists but even that managed to come as a beautiful surprise because it was just so freaking bold.

through the woods, by emily carroll - i loooove emily carroll, the convergence of spine-tingling horror and art that feeds into it, that is both visually and aesthetically pleasing, is hard to beat!  p.s. i also read beneath the dead oak tree from her this year and it was also a BANGER.

the impending blindness of billie scott, by zoe thorogood - zoe is someone that i just want to follow.  she’s just starting and i want to be there for every single step.  i love her art style and her ability to tell a story with it.

above the clouds, by melissa pagluica - this was so unique, and such a baller concept, as nearly half the entire book is conveyed only through the art and yet you’re never once lost, never once confused as to what any character is thinking or feeling.  it’s a story within a story and only one of those gets words though they both are chock full of emotion!

um.... number 5, part 2? crowded, by christopher sebela - everything about this series is fun af.  crowd-funded assassination and a hirable bodyguard who’s rated like an uber driver???  and the chemistry between the two mains is so great and gay!!

honorable mentions: monster and the beast, by renji // long exposure, by kam ‘mars’ heyward // fence, by c.s. pacat // invisible kingdom, by g. willow wilson // ms. marvel, by g. willow wilson // heathen, by natasha alterici // not drunk enough, by tess stone // giant days, by john allison // die, by kieron gillen // be prepared, by vera brosgol // ascender (sequel to descender, which is also great), by jeff lemire // the unbeatable squirrel girl, by ryan north // bang! bang! boom!, by melanie schoen // gideon falls, by jeff lemire // life of melody, by mari costa // cry wolf girl, by ariel slamet ries // the tea dragon society, by katie o’neill // ptsd, by guillaume singelin // heartstopper, by alice oseman // solutions and other problems, by allie brosh // finding home, by hari conner // the magic fish, by trung le nguyen // something is killing the children, by james tynion iv // the weight of them, by noelle stevenson // spill zone, by scott westerfeld // skyward, by joe henderson // miles morales, by saladin ahmed

F I L M S.

parasite, dir. bong joon ho - oh it was satisfying, oh it was suspenseful, oh i had to watch some of it through my fingers but i loooooooved it.  such a good story and so well made.

knives out, dir. rian johnson - okay, everything about this movie was amazing.  every single character was fun as hell and i could’ve watched an entire movie about each of them.  what a great fucking mystery!

blindspotting, dir. carlos lopez estrada -  this made my heart hurt so damn much.  what glorious writing, acting, and story!

portrait of a lady on fire, dir. celine sciamma - gooooorgeous cinematography, amazing chemistry, and such a soft, atmospheric film.

the farewell, dir. lulu wang - i cried and my heart felt so full and i love it so so much.

um.... number 5, part 2? someone great, dir. jennifer kaytin robinson - no part of me expected to love a netflix movie this much but it’s a love story that doesn’t get told that often??  the end of a relationship and the true love of friendship and i love these girls and i love jenny and nate’s broken relationship.

honorable mentions: eighth grade, dir. bo burnham // booksmart, dir. olivia wilde // midsommar, dir. ari aster // the curse of la llorona, dir. michael chaves // the secret life of pets 2, dirs. chris renaud & jonathan del val // jojo rabbit, dir. taika waititi // the invisible man, dir. leigh whannell // the favourite, dir. yorgos lanthimos // can you ever forgive me?, dir. marielle heller // troop zero, dirs. bert & bertie // ready or not, dirs. matt bettinelli-olpin & tyler gillett // brave, dirs. mark andrews & brenda chapman & steve purcell // the half of it, dir. alice wu // palm springs, dir. max barbakow // doctor sleep, dir. mike flanaghan // uncut gems, dirs. benny sadfie & josh sadfie // birds of prey, dir. cathy van // bloodshot, dir. dave wilson // the old guard, dir. gina prince-bythewood // enola holmes, dir. harry bradbeer // hocus pocus, dir. kenny ortega // always be my maybe, dir. nahnatchka khan // finding dory, dirs. andrew stanton & angus maclane // die hard, dir. john mctiernan

S H O W S .

black sails (2014) - this show, this shooooooooow.  i cannot, it just makes me want to cry with how good it is.  the characters, the EMOTIONS, the story, the plaaaaaan.  like, the creators clearly had a plan for every single step of this show and it was a gOOD, GOOD PLAN.

the untamed (2019) - truly, cheesy good fun with one of the best gay romances ever.  i love these characters and their relationships to each other and the way it glories in its own ridiculousness.

the righteous gemstones (2019) - one of the things that bothered me about my next choice (the ratio of female to male nudity) was so much more realistic in this one (i mean, we’ve all gotten five thousand dick pics and i know like three people?  so the fact that there is so rarely male nudity in shows when there are tits everywhere..... no, how does that even make a tiny bit of sense?).  this show was such great, wonderful, awful fun.  they’re not great people and the show is under no delusion about that and it’s GLORIOUS!

the witcher (2019) - this was just hella fun, i loved the characters and the fantasy elements.  i’m excited for the next season, it’s just entertaining swashbuckling through and through!

fargo (2014) - all of this was really very enjoyable with the through line being somebody fucks shit up and gets involved in something they really shouldn’t be involved in that’s going to swallow them whole.  season one and season three were my stand-out favorites but they were all so violent, clever, and vicious!

um.... number 5, part 2? central park (2020) - um..... so many of the hamilton actors in a muscial cartoon drawn and written by the bob’s burgers team? WHAT ABOUT THAT DOESN’T SOUND AMAZING?!  it was such a joy to hear daveed diggs and leslie odom jr.’s voices again!!

honorable mentions: schitt’s creek // the mandalorian // mr. robot // broadchurch // mindhunter // jack ryan // the good place // the end of the f***ing world // big little lies // elite // kidding // servant // letterkenny // curb your enthusiasm // i am not okay with this // ozark // buzzfeed unsolved: true crime/supernatural // you // runaways // dear white people // dickinson // brooklyn nine-nine // will & grace // 9-1-1 // dead to me // solar opposites // never have i ever // killing eve // what we do in the shadows // grace and frankie // avenue 5 // roswell, new mexico // the bold type // evil // tuca & bertie // impulse // the umbrella academy // watchmen // infinity train // corporate // search party // on becoming a god in central florida // a.p. bio // criminal: uk // the morning show // mythic quest // last week tonight // prodigal son // the great

[the-wotog-collection]

some new(ish) kids

“new” as in they didn’t exist yet when we last posted. so some of them are at least 9 months old. anyway!

list under the cut:

CAS

- they’re a half-elf monk! but now that i think about it it would be kinda funny if they had a level or two in rogue

- honestly? they’re a frat boy, but one who drinks respect women (and everyone, really) juice

- complete thembo. they have a -1 int, but +5 dex and +3 cha so who’s really winning here

- seriously when i say they’re a thembo i mean it. cas can dodge bullets all day but they don’t know that a tomato is a fruit

- they’re a people person and respectful and are very much work hard play hard. i love them

PUMPKIN

- now this is a bastard right here

- he/they tiefling rogue. yes they stole that crown what about it

- very much like mollymauk tealeaf i’m not gonna lie. they’ll charm the pants off of you and run away with your whole coin pouch

- smth i love about pumpkin is 1) their last name is pye 2) they have aliases bc in nearly every town they’ve been in there’s a warrant out for his arrest

- pumpkin pye (persona), a flirty rapscallion. if they had to pick one alias to stay as, this would be that one

- apple pye, a quiet sweetheart. kinda country bumpkin-esque

- pecan pye, taciturn but honest (as he can be while using an alias and on the run from the law and generally up to no good) and a hard worker

 - underneath all the layers? he’s kinda sad and lonely, still a flirt and a rapscallion but considerably less, and sometimes he just wants to stay in bed instead of going out and getting into all kinds of trouble

- oh also! he’s self conscious about his freckles, and usually uses some kind of makeup to cover them up if hell brain is acting up/he’s causing trouble

TENJIN

- i’ll be honest i do not remember if i still have their picrew

- i do nvm

- this is tenjin! iirc they’re a drow enchanter (homebrew class my cousin made) but ig in a legal game they’d be a divination wizard

- he’s such a sweetie, oml

- fun fact he has autism! mostly nonverbal and gets overwhelmed super easily, and has a whole pouch full of trinkets that they fidget and stim with

- baby. baby boy

- really fun to play actually

BEE

- she’s here to kick names and take ass, and she’s all out of names

- a whole lesbian. most of why she does what she does is to protect pretty girls

- human (shocker, i know) cleric of a storm god that i forgot to write down

- anyway!

- do no harm but take no shit is her motto. her methods may be borderline illegal, but hey, as long as the thing gets done it’s fine

- usually.

- basically her only method is swing a bat around until people talk and if the bat hits anything/anyone, well. that’s not her business

- oh yeah her bat. it’s infused with electricity and deals lightning damage as well as bludgeoning. it’s sick as hell

- she’s pretty rad

RAY

- everyone needs a weed druid

- okay but seriously. they eat every plant they come across to 1) figure out what they do (they have insanely high con dw) and 2) for magical power

- are they high most of the time? yes. are they really sad actually? also yes

- they aren’t religious, but they do worship the deity their childhood best friend (turned lover, yes) worshipped

- i might talk about that more later :)

- anyway they’re super chill and also one of the few drows i have, iirc

WALKER

- okay now we’re starting to catch up

- his name isn’t actually walker, but it’s what everyone calls him so that’s what he goes by

- he/they (wow theres a lot of he/theys huh) fallen aasimar gloom stalker ranger

- basically think of the edgiest anime boy you can imagine and go “what if he went to therapy”

- he’s such a good boy! yes they still do the adventuring thing, but make a point of going to therapy every week

- they’re making some great progress :)

- while he’s basically a witcher and gets treated like one (i.e. poorly), he just wants to settle down somewhere quiet when there’s no more evil in the world to grow vegetables where the only one around to judge him for being mute is his crow

- the picrew didn’t have a crow so please pretend that’s what the pigeon is

VAL

- valor is a tiefling fighter who came into existence bc i rewatched netflix castlevania and was super gay for striga so i made a character inspired by her

- also has autism, but in addition, she has ptsd from her days in the royal army. she’s seen some shit yall

- isn’t very good with social interactions, a lot of stuff goes right over her head and she’s just awkward as hell, but get her talking about her special interest (military tactics) and she will talk for hours. please let her

- fun fact she met her wife bc she was fishing in a bog trying to catch dinner and fished out a wholeass lady instead

- she’s buff as hell. she could use literally anything as a weapon and make it hurt

UNNAMED WIZARD

- i don’t have a name for them yet BUT i do know that they’re a bitch

- yet another he/they, this time we have a neutral evil wizard who doesn’t care who gets hurt as long as they get results for their experiments

- think albedo genshinimpact but with almost no morals

- yes he’d cast ninth level spells on his party if he was researching something. no he would not feel remorse. probably

- idk i haven’t fleshed him out yet i just know that he’s a bitch

MOUSE

- finally! my favorite character on this list

- this is maisy, but she’s so tiny that everyone calls her mouse

- when i say tiny i mean she’s a halfling and also seven years old. she’s fucking little

- little human druid girl who basically raised herself in the forest and can & will make friends with literally any animal she comes across

- her arcane focus is her flower crown, which also has berries growing on it. they grow back every time she picks one to give to her friends :)

- she’s so fucking pure oh my god. actual cinnamon roll and everything that’s good in this world

- her rat’s name is rat. he’s her friend :)

- and also dog sized compared to her it’s hilarious. she has a little leash for him made of vines and particularly spry twigs

- have some bonus art bc oh my god cutie

[comradekatara]

Hi! I’m kinda new to atla, and came across some of your anti-zutara posts and Im trying to understand sth, if Zuko & Katara’s friendship itself is not problematic or misogynistic then why would a future romance be? I dont interpret their scenes as romantic exactly but I enjoy their pairing bc they do have a solid bond built on respect, understanding and work well as a team, and there’s potential for this to grow in to a romance with an interesting dynamic, esp after a few years of friendship 1/2

Your main anti-argument is the colonizer argument, but you also actively ship Zukka so I’m not sure how that works? Anyway don’t you find that that argument itself takes away from the point of Zuko’s entire arc, and assumes he wouldn’t dismantle the Fire Nations corrupt system? And there’s no reason to assume he would force Katara in to a role she might not be comfortable with or that Katara won’t have full say in how their relationship progresses or takes place. (oh and I’m not white lol) (2/2)

well, there’s a lot to unpack here.

first of all, platonic chemistry doesn’t automatically translate to romantic chemistry! from the little we’ve seen of their actual friendship, I think zuko and katara have something akin to the dynamic zuko could’ve had with azula had they not been forced at each other’s throats. the significance of katara being there for zuko during the final agni kai while azula is completely alone is thus heightened by this interpretation. if you think they have romantic chemistry, who am I to dissuade you? I personally think their similar intensity and flaws would make for a volatile relationship, but would lead to a friendship built on love and understanding, so that’s the interpretation of their dynamic i prefer. also zuko reads as a staunch kinsey 6 to me, but again, that’s a matter of opinion.

that said, i think that if you interpret any of zuko’s actions in trying to win katara’s respect as being because he has feelings for her, well, that framing is kinda creepy. especially the scene where he saves her from falling rubble and refuses to let go of her body. if you think zuko was intentionally trying to cop a feel here, then why exactly would you want him to be with katara, since he clearly doesn’t respect her. and then don’t even get me started on the people who think that time he tied her to a tree was sexy.... like, framing their relationship as romantic just doesn’t sit well with me for that reason. but anyway.

i think people have either gotten genuinely confused or deliberately obfuscated the distinction between criticizing a ship and criticizing a fanbase. my problem with zvtara in a vacuum is just that i think they’re not compatible romantically (despite having a lot of platonic chemistry and being one of the most compelling dynamics in the show!). I feel the same way about sokka and toph, and it’s just a matter of my preference for sibling dynamics over romance when it comes to these pairings! (i also think the age gap between sokka and toph is creepy even as adults because when you meet someone when they’re twelve there’s always gonna be a power imbalance there and there’s no way sokka isn’t aware of that. but i digress.)

to be clear, the reason i have been so vocal about my dislike for the ship is because it exists solely within the fan imagination, and that imagination is viscerally racist. I have said before i do not think shipping zvtara is inherently racist. I know there are black & brown women who ship it, and i’m not gonna act like their lived experiences matter less than a personal preference, but i think when white people advocate for this relationship, it’s really, really easy to fall into racist tropes. you said you’re new to the atla fandom, which means you haven’t been inundated with racist misogynistic bullshit that treats katara like a fetishized object for years the way i have. I don’t hate zvtara in a vacuum, but stuff like “fire lady katara” and pocahontas aus and whitewashed fanart – that shit takes a toll man. I’ve never seen any of that kind of racist bullshit when it comes to kataang fans, and like…. there is a reason for that!

for what it’s worth, if anyone thinks i’ve not been critical of people who ship zvkka falling into similar racist territory, then they must be deliberately turning a blind eye because i complain about zvkka as it exists in the fan imagination constantly. there are certainly racist zvkka fans, but something you need to keep in mind is how few there were until recently. before a couple months ago, when netflix decided to ruin my fucking life, only a handful of people watched atla through anything resembling a queer lens. when the show first aired, the idea that zuko could be interpreted as gay would’ve been absurd to 98% of the fanbase. so i wasn’t inundated with racism from zvkka fans because there were no zvkka fans. now, people on this cursed website watch everything through a gay lens, and it’s a nightmare. because they don’t even care about the characters, they just want an excuse to ship two teenage boys, and it’s deeply obnoxious and kind of concerning. anyway, i could talk all day about zvkka tropes i’ve seen that infuriate me, but that’s not this post.

like i’ve said in the past: I don’t think zvtara is ...inherently racist. what i do think is racist is the way it’s interpreted a majority of the time. if not for the stream of evil bullshit i’ve been inadvertently exposed to regarding this pairing over the years, i would simply say, “eh it’s not for me,” and move the fuck on! but unfortunately, i cannot do that, because i feel a responsibility to condemn racism when i see it??? I know you’re not trying to be deliberately obtuse, but please keep context in mind when it comes to questions like this, instead of getting defensive. I couldn’t care less about anyone’s personal tastes, as long as they’re not promoting things i’m morally opposed to, such as racism or misogyny. it’s possible to enjoy a thing and simultaneously be critical of it & the discussion surrounding it. that’s kind of the whole point of this blog.

[depressedhatakekakashi]

// happy birthday bro!! Hope your birthday is goin great!! I'd buy you a present if I could 😭 but i spent all my money on my Netflix subscription

I don't need presents lol I have all the beautiful people here 💜💜💜

"Kakashi-sensei!" Lifting his eyes from his book, Kakashi raised an eyebrow when he saw Lee running towards him. "Is it alright if I ask you a question?"

That was ominouse.

"please feel free." though he was a little afraid of whatever was on Lee's mind.

"well, you see..." Rocking on his feet, Lee smiled a smile that Kakashi knew all too well. It was the same one Gai always had on his face when he was trying to be cute with him. "I was wondering if you have any advice on how to ask someone out. I asked Gai-sensei, but his methods..."

"ya," Gai's methods were pretty out there, but that is what Kakashi' loved about him. "Sit down. This could be a while. Let's start with who you want to ask out."

He'd take all day if he had to. So long as Lee got the date he was seeking at the end of th day, he would call it a win.

[im-the-punk-who]

Toby Stephens Thirstography #1 - Black Sails (2014-2017)

Toby Stephens Hotness: The Pre-Chorus Of Uptown Funk Was Written About Toby Stephens In Black Sails

Okay, so I dithered about this rating for SO LONG but honestly? Nothing else in Toby’s filmography will ever be close to Black Sails. As I’m sure everyone is aware, Toby Stephens is perfect but it’s especially true in Black Sails. Long haired McGraw? Perfect. Bald and Beardy? Perfect. Ponytail Season 1 Flint crying about his (as yet unrevealed) gay lover? Absolutely Flawless. THIGHS? Could crush a skull like sparrows egg. Frequently shirtless and covered in freckles? My soul has left my body. Need I go on? Just watch Black Sails. 

This really is hands down the best role Toby has ever had, and there’s a little bit of something for everyone. I wouldn’t necessarily say this is “the hottest” Toby Stephens but it is the one that has the most range, and screen time, and like, whatever your thirst, Black Sails has a look for that. And so many emotions. This is one of those times where quantity really does win over quality. If you’re only going to watch one thing with Toby Stephens in it, Black Sails is really the only answer anyone could ever give.

James Flint-McGraw-Hamilton owns my entire heart and I can and will fight about it. But honestly, I’m pretty sure he owns everyone else’s heart too so. Y’know.

Plot: 10/10*

England is terrible and James McGraw is mad about it. Or, this is a prequel to Treasure Island except if literally everyone was queer. Or, Please Do Not Anger The Gay Gingers. 

Black Sails, at its heart, is a story about stories: who tells them, how they tell them. It is a story that drives home that everyone has a bias to the parts of the story they tell: that everyone has a different reason for the stories they choose or do not choose to let see the light of day. It is a story that will challenge you to think differently not just about every other piece of media you consume but your own life - and the stories you are telling. (Like, my personal story is that right now I’m crying and whether or not it’s true that’s the story I want you to believe, so I’m telling it to you.)

I have cried, and laughed, and had just about every other emotion about this show. There are actual canon main queer characters who get actual canon main queer character romances, deep nuanced discussions of social progress, how movements fail and why, who is left out of what historians will say prevailed, and all in a way that feels so very real and human it leaves a huge gaping hole in my chest every time. 

*I promised I’d only say this once: The plot of Black Sails and I have our differences, and it is not perfect. Most of the show is technically flawless but there are parts - sometimes big parts - that are not. And that’s okay! Enjoying flawed media is okay! But I feel like it has to be said because while it absolutely deserves that ten, I don’t want to mislead you into thinking this is a perfect show.

With that said, I have watched this show....I think about 6 times all the way through at the time of typing this, and I’m on my 7th or 8th rewatch, depending on which friend group you ask. There is an incredible wealth of really rich writing, really clever writing, and yes - really game-changing writing. It’s the kind of show in which you will catch new things every time you watch it. 

I don’t know what to tell you except just. Watch Black Sails. Do it with your eyes open because as I’ve said this is not a perfect show and sometimes the writers do tell on themselves, but....it’s just about as close as I’ve ever seen a major series come to it. And I love James McGraw enough to forgive them the rest. 

(Did I mention that the backbone of the entire show is the motivation of one of its queer characters? That you literally cannot remove queerness from Black Sails and still have any part of the plot work? Cool, now I have.)

Watchability: 9/10

Watchability game is strong. 

Black Sails is chock full of humor, exciting ship battles, historical easter eggs, queers, women, people of color(sometimes all three in one!), and really some of the best writing in terms of plot cohesion I’ve ever seen. The costumes and scenery is breathtaking, every single one of the actors showed the fuck up every day...listen could I write more? Yes. I have. But really - just.

... do I have to say it? 

(Watch Black Sails.)

Black Sails is one of those shows that is going to affect everyone differently, and I’m too aware of my own bias to give it a true 10, but there is very little Black Sails gets wrong once it gets going. The first season makes some Choices, and towards the back end of the show it can feel like the writers ran out of metaphorical poster board for their happy birthday sign of a show, but on the whole definitely, 100% worth the go. 

Warnings: 

Graphic depiction(s) of r*pe in S1 and mentions of it in S2, general gore throughout. Although, I hate blood and guts stuff and it only twice really bothered me. Depictions of period typical racism and slavery throughout. @a-gay-coded-villain has made this super thorough, handy dandy So You Think You Can Dance Watch Black Sails (Laynie I’m so sorry I had to) guide that includes most of the major trigger warnings. Make sure you take a look - especially if violence against women bothers you.

Where to Watch:

Hulu is the main place to find this but it is also on Netflix in some countries and on DailyMotion 

[bluetiefling]

So, Cursed (2020), is pretty bad! And I wanted to say a few things because somebody had to. This is mostly ranting.

Cursed was rife with problems from poor pacing to poor worldbuilding to plain cliche and uninspired story arcs, but the most glaring issue has gotta be Katherine herself who c a n n o t carry this thing. It was gonna take a very strong and compelling actress to make Miss Nimmyway work and she is not that. The wooden acting just exacerbates all the issues the character has, which plague a lot of badly conceived fantasy protagonists. Mainly, being devoid of real charm and personality and having no agency because she plods through the story largely reacting to everything and not driving the action (while other characters fall at her feet and love her inexplicably and are there to hold her hand and tell her plot points to react to etc). When she starts “acting out” and showing I guess some semblance of personality, it’s because of ~magic corrupting her, so of course when she snaps at someone or goes into a rage it’s not really her fault and there’s no growth or organic character conflict to develop her. She also does a thing I’ve grown to loath in many protagonists where they get people killed or make stupid mistakes, and then angst about it but really they’re not taking any blame or examining their behavior, they’re just wallowing and making it about themselves. And of course other characters are there immediately to coddle her because actually, she did nothing wrong! And please, be our queen, girl we met five minutes ago who merely showed off some powers (which she complained about the whole time btw)!

Devon as Arthur is great and he can actually act, and he was trying so, so hard sell his romantic dynamic with Ninny but there was no saving it. He was one of many better and multifaceted characters trapped in her orbit where her lack of charisma and overall static character development makes it very hard to understand why he’s so sprung over her, let alone why she wins anyone else over enough that they want her as queen. And on that note idk why all the other characters (her included!) constantly treated him so badly and he himself keeps struggling with his own honor and sense of goodness when he’s an all around goodhearted and noble guy from the jump. It’s like the show was gaslighting me lol. I feel like their plan too is for Arthur to win hearts and minds and take the throne through merit, which I am here for, but I suspect they’re gonna frame it like he stole it from Ninny or something. Like I personally would love that because she sucks, but it’ll be tedious sitting through a show telling me she’s been so wronged by him, if that’s where they’re going with this eventually. I mean they’ve already had it so Morgana only starts feeling negatively about Ninny because (again) corrupting magic, because this show can’t bear to have characters form doubts about her competence or worthiness in a sincere way. 

Morgana is another character played by a lovely and talented actress who immediately adores Ninny (well, I guess not immediately, but they had Ninny tell her “hey, being gay is okay” and that’s enough for Morgana to declare them bffs forever) and she too suffers from trying to prop up Ninny all season. I couldn’t believe it when in one scene Ninny throws a fit and tosses the sword in a canyon and Morgana jumps to declare she’ll go fetch it while Ninny literally sits and pouts. I mean??? And that’s basically their dynamic - Ninny complaining and Morgana bending over backwards to push this useless girl to her “destiny”. Lol and I guess they’re gonna expect me to side with Ninny when Morgana goes all dark sided. 

It is so telling that one of Arthur and Morgana’s strongest moments was when they get their one (1) scene talking to each other about something that isn’t Ninny related. Devon and Shalom saw the chance to Act and they came alive right there. 

Daniel is the reason I first heard about this show and I unabashedly loved his character and all the dramatic dance fighting - he was the highlight for me lol. (I KNOW I know) But that’s a problem when said character is very underutilized. He appears in every episode I think but sometimes that just amounts to less than a minute of screen time. His secret Lancelot on a path to redemption is one of the few twists on the legend that I’m really into, but there was so little to see of him. Like of course they must have been planning more focus for him next season, but that doesn’t mean there wasn’t more they could do with him here. His redemptive turn is prompted by a few scenes in the finale when they could’ve been seeding it more throughout. And I would’ve loved more scenes with him and Arthur (who managed to spark with him in their one fight scene far more than he does with whatshername). Before I’d seen the show I would’ve said I hope he interacted with Ninny a lot to see if there was something worth shipping but uhhh... hard pass on the idea now and it’s maybe a relief I didn’t have to sit through him falling in love with her instantly while she looks bored and delivers her lines with the exact same cadence for every scene.

And speaking of female characters he is presumably going to have a romantic arc with (that’s assuming this show actually gets a s2 which it doesn’t really deserve... .....), we have Red Spear. Or should I say RRRRED SPEEAARRR RAHHH because the actress couldn’t say a line without rage yelling it. And I wouldn’t care except I know this woman is meant to be Guinevere according to the book and.......... ...... ..... Like putting aside my aggravation at Guinevere being another rawwrr warrior woman because these writers have very limited ideas for Strong Female Characters apparently, but I can’t deal with her also being lowkey deranged like RED SPEAR comes across in all her scenes. She was just too much. And we have such a good Arthur and Lancelot and the thought them trying to make that love triangle work with RED SPEAR is actively painful.  

On that note, I’m a tiny bit hopeful that the fact the Guinevere name drop never happened in the show (as it did at the end of the book) means they’ve realized the actress can’t do this and they’ve cut that. Maybe she’ll be recast? Ideally they rewrite the plan for Guinevere entirely and let her be, god forbid, a courtly maiden who can’t fight but is no less “strong” for it? What a concept. The team behind this show doesn’t inspire confidence on that front, though. They seem set in their ways... I am also preparing myself for the possibility that they just merge Nimue and Guinevere after they realize Nimue has largely served her purpose already and they struggle to come up with things for her to do. And then my suffering will continue because I will keep watching this garbage for Daniel.

I have no idea what the viewership numbers are for this show - I would guess not great but worse things have been popular on Netflix so who knows. It doesn’t deserve a s2, but the show is potentially salvageable I think? I mean my recommendation would be letting Nimue stay dead at the end, her purpose and story finished, and let Arthur take over as the main with Lancelot and a new, not Red Spear Guinevere, as co-leads. You could really have something with that combination. Also get a new showrunner and reshuffle the writers’ room while they’re at it.