#no i'm not done yet. i wrote the first third and the last third and now i have to struggle through the middle third.

[rachelfoleyisntdead]

Me writing HUNK "dying" like that mf ever got a single scratch on a mission. The only true instance of something being "out of character" ever.

[acis-arts]

Hello everyoneee, I got super busy recently, but I was still able to do some art and writing in the meantime! Here's all my Cult Leader Designs as well as mentions of the AUs I have!!

Some of these will probably change over time, if I feel like it. I just wanna info dump on my AUs and I also think it's good to post how they currently look instead of waiting for too long.

Down below is the info dump on my AUs:

(Before you start reading: "Kali" is the name of my Lamb)

Lost Crowns AU (/Forgotten Lands of the Old Faith):

This AU was called "Forgotten Lands of the Old Faith" at first, but I refer to it as "Lost Crowns AU" mostly because that name fits too and is shorter.

This is my main AU! In it, the entire story of the game is pretty much unchanged, this AU focuses more on what happens after the events in the game. I haven't finished the game yet and I'm assuming after getting all Bishops, the game is pretty much done. (update because I wrote these notes some days ago: I got Shamura in my cult today so I finished the main story at last)

"A few days after freeing all the Bishops, Kali wakes up and something is missing. The Red Crown is gone, all Crowns are gone. They run to find Narinder and the Bishops, but none of them are behind it. Together, all 6 of them try to confront the Mystic Seller next, but upon arriving at the gate they were always situated in, they find nothing."

The Mystic Seller left the Lands of the Old Faith for good and took everything supernatural with them. I haven't thought about a solid reason for that yet, because my main idea behind this is that Kali and the others are now forced to live without all their supernatural powers. They can't perform Rituals, they can't resurrect, they can't summon weapons and none of the Follower necklaces work anymore. The only thing that was left is the immortality of Kali, Narinder and the Bishops. They won't age but the risk of dying permanently is there.

I have no idea if I want to keep this idea or if I want to scrap this, but I also thought about Kali finding a gateway into the lands of the Gods and together with Narinder, they try to find the Mystic Seller to get answers. The reason Narinder comes along is because he's more familiar with that place and Kali would need someone like that. The second reason obviously being that I want to pair them up and have them develop their relationship over this adventure (with a proposal at the end of it perhaps). Third reason: it's fun to have the Bishops take care of the Cult without Kali and Narinder around.

I have so much more stuff for this AU, but this is already so much text. Let's hope I get to post more in the future!

Swap AU:

This is pretty self explanatory and the majority of what I posted on here so far. As a short summary: Narinder is now the Last Cat remaining, becoming the Vessel of Kali as The One Who Waits

No Mercy AU:

This is based on the second save file I have in COTL, on which I'm trying to do an "evil route". In this AU, Kali isn't kind and optimistic, instead becoming a callous, cruel cult leader after receiving the Red Crown. Up until that moment, they were at the bottom of the food chain and upon receiving the power of a God, they were finally the one in control for the first time in their life. They decided to never let go of the Crown and their Powers.

Orange Crown AU:

This AU is pretty much just my close circle and me inserted into Cult of the Lamb. So far my partner and me are inserted as NariLamb and my brother is the Mystic Seller because he looks like them. This one is probably uninteresting to most of you, as you don't know any of us. I won't be posting that much about this and keep it private mostly, but maybe some of you are still interested in the art, so let's see.

As always, Thank you so much for reading up until this point!! I hope you all had a good week!

[wwilsonbarness]

I messed up.. (part 2)

pairings:  bucky barnes x reader

summary: Bucky tries to apologise for the things he said... do you accept?

warnings: angstttt, some fluff, anxiety?, idkk i think that's all :)

word count: 2535

a/n: I'm so sorry it took so long for part 2. I hated what I first wrote and my week ended up super busy. I'm so scared to post this lmao I hope it doesn't disappoint!

Feedback, likes and reblogs are much appreciated :) 

I do not give permission for my work to be copied, reposted or translated on any other platform.

part one

masterlist

Sam insisted you took it easy for the rest of the night, he brought you dinner in bed, checked on you every hour, and brought you everything you could need. You appreciated it but at the same time you just wanted to lay in bed alone and cry. For the first few hours it was out of sadness, seeing Bucky that angry with you made your chest ache, the thought of disappointing him was something you couldn’t handle, but as the hours passed the sadness slowly turned into anger. The more you replayed his words in your mind the angrier you got, how could he imply you didn’t care about your baby? 

Ever since you were a little girl yourself you had wanted to be a mom, it was your dream and Bucky knew that.You had both spent countless nights talking for hours on end about how excited you were to have a baby together, you thought he was excited too but were you and your baby just a burden to him? A problem he had to sort out? Did he even want this?

Hours had passed and you were starting to drift to sleep when you heard voices outside your bedroom door. Part of you wanted to stay in bed and ignore whoever it was but when you heard Bucky’s voice you jump out of bed. 

“I just want to check if she's okay.” You hear Bucky’s voice through the door, slightly louder than he normally speaks, a clear sign he was getting frustrated. You hear a second voice but you can’t figure out who it is until you move closer, it was Sam.

“You… chance..screwed up..” It’s muffled but you can guess what he said. You keep walking closer to the door and go to open it as you hear a third voice. 

“Barnes, you need to leave her be, you’ve done enough tonight.” That was definitely Tony, he was the only one to call Bucky by his last name. 

You weren’t ready to face Bucky yet but you didn’t want to have to listen to them arguing any longer so you opened the door, to be faced with Bucky standing right in front of you, Tony to the side of him and Sam a few doors down outside his room. 

“Can you guys argue somewhere else please?” Bucky’s head flys round at the sound of your voice. He instantly looks you up and down, focusing on your bump for a few seconds longer than anywhere else, which reminds you of how he had looked at you earlier. You bring your hand up to your stomach without realising. 

“Doll, are you okay?” You could see the concern in his eyes this time but you couldn’t get past the anger you were feeling. 

“I’m fine, Bucky. I just want to sleep so can you three go somewhere else if you’re gonna shout at each other.” Bucky’s face started to lighten up in relief for a second but tensed up again as you continued. 

“I’m sorry, can we please talk?” He starts to walk closer to you but you flinch and move backwards into your room. You weren’t scared of him but you couldn’t handle this tonight. Bucky’s face drops as he watches you move away from him. “Doll I just want to-” 

“I don’t have the energy tonight Bucky, please can you just leave me alone.” You look at each other for a few seconds before you plead again, “Please.” Bucky slightly nods his head but you don’t wait for any other type of response before you close your door. 

You lean your head against the door as it shuts, taking a deep breath in as an attempt to keep yourself calm. You hear Bucky and Tony throw a couple more sentences at each other, resulting in Tony asking F.R.I.D.A.Y to lock your door to anyone but him and Sam. You didn’t want to shut Bucky out but the things he said to you really hurt your feelings and if you were to talk to him about it now you would end up saying things you regret. You just wanted and needed time to yourself to calm down. You climb back into bed and go to sleep to try and forget about the whole situation, it takes a few hours but sleep finally washes over you. 

You could only sleep for a few hours before your morning sickness hit. Without Bucky there to help you like every other morning it was a lot harder to deal with. After sitting beside the toilet for a few minutes you manage to run yourself a bath and relax for a bit. You wanted to put off talking with Bucky as long as you could, you knew he’d already be awake as he was every day, probably in the kitchen making breakfast. 

You hear a knock at your door as you're in the bath which brings you out of your thoughts about Bucky, but when you reach the door all that’s there is a tray with waffles, fruit and orange juice on it. You pick it up and place it on your desk to find a note, recognising Bucky’s handwriting straight away you pick it up.

I’m sorry for everything I said and did. I want to make it up to you when you are ready to talk. I know you’ve probably been unwell this morning so I hope this makes you feel better. I put some gummy bears on the waffles since I know you’ve been craving sweet things. I love you and baby so much - Buck x 

You feel your eyes tear up as you read each word, and even though you’re mad at him all you want in this moment is for Bucky to hold you. You quickly get dressed and start to walk towards the kitchen, hoping he’s still there. To your luck he was still hovering around the cooker cleaning up his mess from cooking breakfast.

“Buck?” His head whips around at lightning speed to the sound of your voice. He takes one step towards you before stopping himself, remembering how you reacted last night. The last thing he wanted to do was scare you more.

“Doll, are you okay?” 

“Mhmm, can we talk?” Bucky lets out a huge breath he wasn’t aware he was holding as you speak, he wants nothing more than to talk to you. 

“Of course doll, wanna sit over here?” He points his hand towards the couch in the corner of the room. You nod your head and walk over. When you both sit down it’s quiet for a few minutes, both of you equally scared to break the silence until Bucky speaks. 

“Are you scared of me?” He asks, tone soft as if he’s scared of what the answer might be.

“No, Bucky I’d never be scared of you.” His shoulders start to relax in relief but not for long as you continue. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not mad at you.” 

“I am so so sorry y/n, I promise you I didn’t mean anything I said, I was just scared which I know isn’t an excuse but it’s the truth. My worst fear is losing you, and now with the baby on the way I’m even more scared of losing you both. When I heard Sam telling Tony and Nat that you were seen with a bump it was.. It was like my brain just took over, I kept imagining you being hurt and I just wouldn’t be able to live with myself if that happened. I can’t lose you, either of you. If you let me, I promise I will try my best to make things back the way they were.” 

Bucky’s speech took you off guard, you were expecting and hoping to speak first so you could get everything out while you felt able to, you had to try so hard to hold back your tears. You could tell he was sorry and honestly part of you just wanted to say it’s okay, tell him you forgave him, that everything was fine but the other part of you was still focused on his horrible words yesterday, and you knew things would never be okay again unless you told him how he made you feel. “I just need to get this off my chest Bucky, I know you’re sorry but I still need to say this. He nods his head to show he understands you.

You take a deep breath and prepare yourself to speak. “First off, I just want to make it completely clear, that” you bring your hand to your stomach and cup the small bump you have, “I love and care so much for this baby, more than anything or anyone else in the world. So when you said that to me, said that I.. That I didn’t care, it really really hurt me. I know I went against what we agreed, I know I scared you, but that didn’t give you a right to talk to me the way you did.” 

“I kno-” Bucky tries to respond but you don’t let him. Your voice is beginning to shake and there are tears starting to fall from your eyes. Bucky’s heart was breaking at seeing you so upset.. all because of him.

“No, please let me finish. I.. I know you care about me and our baby, I know you do but you went way too far. You were so worried about other people hurting me you didn’t realise that you were the one doing it.” 

You can hear Bucky swallow deeply as he listens, his eyes growing wetter with every word, it was hard for him to hear but he knew everything you were saying was true. He had done the one thing he swore he never would, he hurt you and he wasn’t sure he’d ever forgive himself for it. “You promised me that you would never hurt me, and I believed you.” Your voice cracks with your last words, and the tears finally escape. “You made me feel like we were burdening you, like we were just a problem to you, something you had to deal with.”

Bucky desperately wants to reach out and comfort you but he stops himself. He keeps his eyes locked with yours and you nod your head a little, a silent way of telling him that it was his turn to talk. He nods back and readies himself, he had a lot he wanted to say but now he’d heard how much he had hurt you, it was like his brain had forgotten everything. 

“You have to know that you both are the most important people in my life, you could never be a burden to me, ever. I'm so sorry I made it feel that way. Y/N I know I hurt you, I want.. I need you to know that when I made that promise I meant it, I’ve never intended to hurt you, and for the rest of my life, as long as you’ll have me I promise, with every single part of me that I will care and love for you and our baby.” You are starting to choke up at what he is saying but try so hard not to let it show. 

“I’m not going to lie to you, I’ll always be scared of something happening to you both and nothing’s gonna ever change that, but I know now that I need to find other ways of working through that. I’ll do anything it takes for you to forgive me. I want to be there for you and our baby forever.” He looks down to your bump, his gaze softens, a slight smile grows, and with a quiet, soft voice he continues. 

“I can’t wait to see you be a mom, you’re gonna be the best there is. I really mean it, our baby is so lucky to have you as a parent.” When he looks up he tries to understand how you’re feeling but your face is pretty much blank, you were in shock. You’d only been in two relationships before Bucky but not once had either of them apologised for something they did, now Bucky was practically begging you to forgive him, you didn’t know how to take it. You just knew you couldn’t lose him.

“Buck.. As much as I hate how you spoke to me, I don’t want to let this argument get between us, I want things to change. I know you are scared and I understand that.. I’m scared too, but we can get through it together. We are strong enough to not let this break us apart, okay?” 

Bucky lets out a huge breath he didn’t even realise he was holding in. “Doll, I want nothing more than for us to be okay.” 

You stand up and put your hand out towards him, “Come on, I got you something.” He hesitantly grabs your hand, and follows you to your room. Just as you reach the door he stops, and drops his hand out of yours. “Bucky.. It’s okay you can come in.” 

“Are you sure?” He asks hesitantly.

“I’m positive.” He smiles slightly at your answer then follows you in.

“I got youu…” You trail your words out as you dig for his gift. “This.” You pass him the teddy, expecting to smile but instead he frowns, rubbing his thumb over each word as he reads it. 

“You don’t like it?” you ask him, taking a seat next to him. 

“I do,” He forces a smile out, “I’m just worried I won’t be a good dad. I’m just scared doll.” He looks up to you again and sees your eyes still glossy, and he feels he has to defend his words. “I am excited, please know I am. I just don’t wanna mess up again.” He reaches out to touch your stomach and you see him hesitating so you put your hand on top of his and gently push it onto your stomach.

“It’s gonna be okay Buck, I trust you.” You lay your head on his shoulder and cuddle into him, “We’re gonna be okay.” 

“I love you both so much.” 

“And we love you too.” Just as you finish speaking your stomach rumbles, which startles Bucky.

“Oh my god. Was that the baby??” 

You had to hold in your laughter as you replied to him, it was way too early for the baby to kick. “No Bucky, I’m just hungry.” He follows your gaze to the tray with the breakfast he made you. 

“Dolll… you didn’t eat?” You shake your head and Bucky stands up and brings it to bed.”Wanna share?” 

“Of course.” He picks up a gummy bear but before he can put it in his mouth you grab it.

“Hey!” He looks at you confused. 

“Sorry,” you say between your giggles, “you aren't getting any of the gummy bears, baby wants all of them.” 

“Oh yeah? Baby wants all of them? Sureee.” You were both laughing now, as you tried to get all the gummy bears before him.

tags: (tagging everyone who was interested, sorry if I miss anyone!)

@missvelvetsstuff @learisa @pattiemac1 @satanstittyss @opheliabarnes @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @kandis-mom @lokislady82 @k4t13l0u1s3 @jbbarnesgirl @nikkivillar @sarahjoestewy-blog @aboobie @queerqueenlynn @shabanggg @topguncultleader @wintrsoldrluvr @invalid-croissant @ada728 @that-girl-named-alex @spoopiloops @mayusenpai666 @paarthurnax59 @cl7ire @hereforfun22-blog @almosttoopizza @trixiekaulitz @aweleyirene @blackwood-bodecker-housewife @mavrellover91 @yeselmolovesyou

[antianakin]

i saw that you put finnrey as your “most potential” ship and i was just wondering what makes you see them as more romantic over a platonic relationship? especially considering the finnpoe presence lol

and to be clear, definitely not judging you or saying everyone has to prefer finnpoe, i just haven’t seen very many people talk about finnrey as a romantic pair, or at least i haven’t interacted with it, so i’m curious for your take :)

I'm going to start this with a disclaimer: I do not dislike Finnpoe at all, I actually quite enjoy Finnpoe as a ship, I think that Finn and Poe's dynamic in the movies is (mostly) enjoyable, and I do think there is an obvious foundation for the interpretation of them as romantic based on what we see in the films.

Finnrey are pretty obviously set up as a future romantic couple in TFA, to the point that the person who wrote the novelization has said that that is how he wrote them because it seemed REALLY REALLY OBVIOUS that that's where they were going with that relationship with what he had seen of it and he was pretty surprised when future films didn't follow up on that. There is arguably more explicit set-up for Finnrey in the first film of their trilogy than there was for Han/Leia (and also Luke/Leia since their sibling relationship wasn't established yet when ANH came out) and even for Anidala in their respective first films together.

It's Rey that Finn goes back for, fulfilling a place in her life that she's been waiting on for literal years, becoming the first person Rey feels like she can trust. Finn gets jealous when he thinks that Rey is going back to a boyfriend on Jakku. There's an entire running gag that is about the two of them holding hands, something usually pretty connected to romantic couples. Finn only joins the Rebellion because he cares enough about Rey to want to go back to save her (and he also answers his call of destiny by doing so, as visualized by him being given and then using Anakin's lightsaber as part of that decision). Rey answers her own call to destiny when she calls Anakin's lightsaber to her, something she only does in order to save Finn after Kylo has injured him. The two of them impact each other's storylines in a way that NO ONE ELSE DOES.

I also personally feel like Finn and Rey were originally built as CO-LEADS in TFA, neither one was supposed to be "the main character" over the other. They were BOTH intended to be Force sensitive, BOTH intended to become Jedi, BOTH intended to be the awakening in the Force. Their connection was the whole heart of the story in TFA. Allowing them to be love interests for each other just helps cement that. Finnrey being allowed to remain love interests throughout the Sequel trilogy could've helped keep Finn from being sidelined, it could've helped keep REY from being sidelined, it could've allowed Kylo Ren to remain a villain, it could've helped keep some of the more interesting themes of TFA from being completely and utterly dropped.

By comparison, Poe was supposed to die in TFA. He and Finn share maybe 2-3 scenes total with each other, which are split up between the very beginning and the end of the second act of the film, leaving a LOT of time in-between where neither we as the audience nor Finn in universe even SEE Poe (and he mostly disappears when the third act on Starkiller Base starts up, too). Giving Finn a love interest that isn't Rey also opens the door for him to be sidelined in favor of Rey. This is something we can actually see done intentionally in TLJ with Finn and Rose. It pulls focus from what was set up as the focal point and heart of the narrative in TFA (Finn and Rey's relationship) and provides an excuse for why Finn isn't taking part in the bigger storylines with Rey.

And last but not least, I don't personally believe that there was ever a snowball's chance in hell that Finn and Poe were ever going to become an canon couple in a Disney Star Wars movie (it wouldn't have happened in a Lucas-run Sequel Trilogy either, but that's not really the point here). Finnrey could've. You can even argue that it SHOULD'VE happened and that it WOULD'VE happened (if Rian Johnson hadn't come in and decided to ignore everything that was set up in TFA). And Finnrey theoretically still HAS a shot at being made canon. It seems a LOT more likely that if they continue to explore the characters in the future that we'll see Finn and Rey get together romantically than that we would see Finn and Poe get together romantically.

So while I like Finn and Poe, I don't feel like there was real potential that actually got squandered in the films when they didn't happen, whereas there was ACRES of potential for Finn and Rey that got completely thrown away, and doing so really hurt both of their characters and the trilogy as a whole.

[deltaromeo3]

𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎..? #3 ⋆ Charles Leclerc

pairing: charles leclerc x reader

summary: in which the reader does not recognise the famous Monegasque Formula 1 driver; the very same one that was about to change her perspective on the sport and also her life.

— buckle up cos this is a long one yall…. a lil smau at the end? 👀

— you can read parts 1 & 2 here: #1 #2

You went on three more dates after the brunch date. You really enjoyed his company and agreeing to go for brunch with him was the best decision you've ever made.

Charles had popped the question on the third date and of course, you said yes. However, you still kept your relationship private but not secret. No one knew who he was dating and vice versa…. yet.

Today was your final paper for Uni. You had spent the last few weeks focused on studying so you couldn't meet Charles (and attend his races) as often as you wanted to but he was totally understanding and even had flowers delivered to your house to boost your morale.

You went to school with the notes you wrote clutched in your hands. You had a few hours to kill so you decided to have a light breakfast and head to the library to do last minute revisions with Emma.

The clock hits 1:30pm and all the students were gathered in the examination hall, seated in their respective places as the papers were being handed out. You turned to Emma who was seated a few seats diagonally behind you.

She shows a thumbs up and mouths 'good luck!' with a smile on her face.

You returned the gesture and then turn your attention back towards yourself.

Three hours later, you exited the exam hall and let out a sigh of relief. You took out your phone to text Charles, letting him know you were done with your final paper of the goddamn semester.

In the midst of typing, you bumped into someone.

"Oh god I'm so sor- Charles?!" You yelled out.

He laughs but was quick to shush you by covering your mouth, "Hi,"

You were shocked to see him as he was away for the British Grand Prix. You figured you had a few days left before he returns but as you just found out, he was back early.

You hugged him in joy and he embraces you in his arms.

"How was the paper?" He asks as he lets go, the two of you walking away.

"Good- but difficult. I think I'll do well," You hesitantly say.

His eyebrows furrow, "You think? Come on, don't say that! I know you'll do well,"

"Yeah? You think so?"

"Of course! You're my girl, there's nothing you can't do my love," He says as he kisses your forehead.

You smiled in response, feeling a little better.

"Let's go for dinner?"

It's like he was able to read your mind.

Fast forward, it was graduation. You did indeed do well. Your parents couldn't attend as they were miles away so they supported you via live stream. Charles however...

@yourusername posted on their story

@charles_leclerc posted on their story

Monza.

Monza was a particularly important race; Charles loved the Monza GP as much as he loved his home race- it held a very special place in his heart.

This was your first time attending, the atmosphere of the tifosi’s was like nothing you’ve ever seen before.

You were with Emma in the Ferrari hospitality as Charles had paddock & VIP passes for the both of you. Of course, he couldn’t forget Emma. He said if it weren’t for her, the two of you wouldn’t have met.

The both of you were seated at the back of the garage with headphones on, focused on the race.

The race started off well. Charles was on pole, which was amazing, he even managed to maintain his position for the next 53 laps, keeping the two Mercedes drivers behind him at bay.

“Mercedes threw everything at him today- Charles Leclerc has coped brilliantly! He won in Spa, he wins in Monza!”

As soon as his car crosses the finish line and the checkered flag waves, you rushed over to the barricades, waiting for him.

As soon as he parks his car in the Parc Ferme, he rushes to the team donned in red.

He brushed past everyone as soon as he saw you at the front of the line. He runs over to you, immediately embracing you in a hug.

You hugged him back but was taken aback at his sudden action because your relationship hadn’t gone public yet. But today, Charles figured it was time the world knew.

You kissed the top of his helmet, afterwards pushing his visor up, eyes locked with the same set of green eyes you were first met with at the supermarket a year back. His eyes were squinting- he was smiling.

With his hands rested on your waist, he proceeds to place his forehead on yours, “Je t’aime. I love you. Je t’aime tellement. I love you so much.” He says loud enough so you could hear him over the screams and cheers.

You smiled. Your heart melts when the words escape his mouth because prior to this, the both of you hadn’t said your “I love you’s” yet.

“Take off your helmet,” You said and he quickly proceeded to do so.

You placed your hands on the side of his face bringing him in closer, kissing him. Once you let go, you said,

“Je t’aime aussi, Charles. I love you too, Charles.”

-

yourusername

liked by emmaharper, charles_leclerc, yoursister and others

yourusername I guess I’m a Ferrari fan now…🤭

emmaharper #ForzaFerrari 🤪🤪

charles_leclerc 😘😘 I love you

yourusername I love you too❤️

emmaharper ew

yourusername @emmaharper 🙄

yoursister SO THIS IS HOW I FIND OUT U R DATING CHARLES BLOODY LECLERC???

yourusername 😳😳

charlesleclerclover well now we know who’s the mystery girl…👀

charlesleclerc_fc new wag!!!!!

user1 ooh so she’s the doctor he posted about!

yourusername @user1 yessir🤭

yourfriend y/n you dating a f1 driver was NOT on my bingo card….

yourusername hehehe surprise…?

view all 136 comments

A/N: here it is, the long awaited part 3! and with that, the “and you are…?” series comes to an end!! hehe definitely didn’t expect there to he 3 parts but oh well! i hope you guys enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! thank you for all the love <3

ps. im open for requests :)

— taglist: @charlottemount @fangirlika @lunnnix @maryleclerc

[weirdkpopgirl]

Pain | Jaemin Imagine #11

Title: Pain

Genre: Angst, slight fluff

Warnings: description/mention of period cramps -- i'm sorry

Word Count: 791

Author's Note: I mean the title and warning makes it pretty obvious, but I wrote this while I was on that time of month. Although I do have a group post for NCT Dream about periods, I wanted to write a little more about it for awhile now. Especially when my experience has been kinda excruciating lately lol. Anyway, please don't read if this topic makes you uncomfortable.

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

It was 10 a.m. on a Saturday, and you regretted not sleeping in (you didn’t even know how you got out of bed, honestly). Instead, you were hunched over your laptop, typing up the third body paragraph of a research paper that was due next week. However, you found it nearly impossible to concentrate due to the stabbing pain shooting through your abdomen. Lucky for you, your lovely period came knocking at your door the day before. Now you were trying to endure the second day, where the amount of pain only seemed to increase.

A soft groan escaped your lips as you clenched your fists on the desk, willing yourself to push through the agony. But the dull ache in your stomach only seemed to worsen with each passing moment. It was driving you insane, seriously. 

Then just when you were on the verge of breaking, Jaemin entered the room carrying a mug of hot chocolate because he knew you preferred it over coffee. His brows furrowed with concern when he noticed your tense figure, and he immediately caught the pained expression on your face. 

Crossing the room to carefully place the steaming ceramic mug on a coaster near you. “Hey, you don’t look so good,” he said softly, locking eyes with you. “Are you okay, baby?”

Typically, you liked to keep your emotions guarded. The thought of your boyfriend seeing you in such a vulnerable state was the last thing you wanted, especially at a time like this. Despite your efforts to offer him a reassuring smile, it faltered as a new wave of cramps surged through you.

 “It just hurts,” you muttered, firmly pressing your knuckles against your forehead.

Jaemin frowned, realizing this was serious if you weren’t even trying to hide your discomfort from him. He calmly scanned the room in search of anything that might help you.

“Why don’t you take some medicine? I can grab you some painkillers.”

But you quickly shook your head in rejection. “I’ll be fine. I don’t like taking those unless I have to.”

You heard Jaemin sigh before he moved to stand behind you. Then you felt his hands start to gently knead your shoulders, trying to ease some of the tension. On any normal day, your body would’ve stiffened immediately and you might have withdrawn. But right now, you were grateful for his touch and it did help a little.

“Maybe you should put your essay on pause for now,” he suggested, stealing a glance at your screen. “You’ve already done more than enough today. Come lay down with me and rest for a bit?”

Though you hesitated for a moment, your fatigue overridden any inclination to protest. After giving him a weak nod, you allowed Jaemin to lift you from the chair and guide you to the couch. With a deep breath, you sank into the cushion and curled up against your boyfriend’s body. He happily wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer.

Yet, the pain persisted, even in Jaemin’s comforting embrace. You had to bite your lip to stifle a whimper, as you felt tears prick your eyes. He picked up on your distress fairly quickly, his heart breaking at the sight of your pain. Leaning down, he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead in hopes of bringing you some sort of comfort.

However, the sweetness of his gesture prompted the first tear to stream down your cheek. Perhaps it was a mix of embarrassment, gratitude, and frustration swirling within you. Regardless, Jaemin kept you in his arms and peppered a few more kisses atop your head.

“Shh, it’s okay baby,” he murmured, his deep voice barely above a whisper. “Just let it out, you don’t have to keep it in.”

As if on cue, you closed your eyes and buried your face in Jaemin’s chest. Tears soaked helplessly into the fabric of his white t-shirt, as you clung to him tightly. You weren’t the type to cry in front of others, but the relentless cramps from your stupid period had pushed you to your limit.

Though it stung to hear your sobs and feel your body tremble against his, Jaemin was mostly grateful that you weren’t bottling up your emotions. Holding you close, whispering soothing words of comfort, and his fingers lightly stroking your hair were all things that were second nature to him. 

If he could take all your pain away from you, he swore he would in a heartbeat.

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

previous masterlist -> current masterlist

[goodluckclove]

Hello! I’m an aspiring author and I was wondering how you got people to get invested in your story and characters?

Well first off I'd bet upwards of 30 dollars that you aren't an "aspiring writer". While I'm firmly in the camp that you need to at some point write something to be a writer, I also believe if you've ever made any attempt to write anything you're past the point of "aspiring". You're doing it, man.

Even if it fails? Especially if it fails. Most of my career is failure that's like a third of my job.

If you haven't tried to write anything yet, you can open up your word processor right goddamned now and churn out 500 words of whatever-the-fuck, and then you'll be done with the label of aspiring writer forever.

Rant aside - that's been building up for a while, but no one's referred to themselves in that way to me directly before.

Okay, so my secret to creating stories and characters that people can get invested in. Because I guess at this point I can say that I do that. My secret is going to sound really weird and kind of mean but maybe it can help other writers. Here it is, put simply:

I have a very low awareness of other people's ability to engage with my work, positively or negatively, and because of that I am hardwired to create solely for my own amusement.

Maybe it's because I was writing alone for about ten years. Don't get me wrong - I value the critiques I've gotten from beta readers. I understand the use of beta readers now. And I do love positive feedback. Oh man it's been such a pleasure being able to have people to talk to about writing, just the highlight of my creative life. But if my engagement plummeted and no one spoke to me on this Tumblr ever ever again - which I hope doesn't happen - that wouldn't stop me. I'd be sad for maybe a few days, but ultimately I'd keep posting little snippets and sharing insights on writing and doing exactly what I'm doing now.

I essentially treat my Tumblr like I did my high school WordPress, which I don't think anyone read. I still posted because I found it fun.

People talk about writing for yourself and they debate whether or not it's valid or pick-me trash. I don't get that argument because it's not really - like - optional? In my opinion? It's not the only thing you need to do, but I do believe it's a thing you need to do.

My last book is like 188k words. That's fucking long. I fully believe the reason a majority of positive feedback comes from the fact that I wrote it in full earnestness towards what I liked and wanted to see in a story. I did think of the reader, but mainly to the extent that I would want a writer to think of me as a reason. Which is mainly in creating a literary landscape that's comforting and exciting in a safe way. Because that's what I wanted to do.

I'm a deeply, deeply selfish writer by nature. Sometimes I worry about markets, or trends, or whether anyone would want to read 4-5 asexual epics where like one major plot point happens per book. But then I get distracted by something, usually writing whatever happens next, and I eventually lose interest in thinking about it. And I firmly believe if you commit to the bit to that obsessive extent - I mean, it probably won't get you commercial success. I am the wrong person to talk about gaining commercial success. But with the right marketing tactics it could gain you cult notoriety.

Frankly my whole goal in life is to be a sort of asexual John Waters type. Like just a kindly, strange, vaguely Eldritch queer with ramshackle production capabilities that just end up happening somehow. That's the dream.

[zombeebunnie]

Trembling Essence:💙Choice exploration + finished scenes💙

Hello and welcome new followers, here's an update on how things are going with the game! Firstly a big thank you to the sudden influx of support I got this week, I'm happy knowing people liked the little meme video I did! :,]

This post might be a little long since I had to rewrite a few things, I was trying to upload a picture of one of the new areas you can go in but I got an error and couldn't save what I wrote. :,S

Anywho, I mainly focused on quality of life changes and continued working with the one of the endings you can get at the start of the game.

I don't really know where to start but this ending took a lot longer than expected to really hit what I've been trying to go for. At first, it was going to have two different endings. I took out one of them because I didn't have much of a connection with it and I liked the idea of it being straightforward instead. When I went back over it, everything happened too quickly for my liking. To fix this I went back and added a few choices to at least give you an idea of what the area is like and how it effects the player(Y/N) while making sure the dialog transitioned correctly with what you see on the screen. It's nothing too wordy but I do like it a lot more than I did before. Even though this is still considered one ending there is a alternate version you can get depending on a certain choice. Towards the end I fixed up all the spelling errors I could find and happily enough, there wasn't many. For right now I'd say this ending is finished! Yay! x]

Here's one of my favorite CG's I drew for it:

I love how it turned out because I really want to do different angles and perspective through the terrain, I think this one is my favorite so far! :,,]

Here's a evening time version of it:

It's suppose to be raining in this image but I still need to practice getting the angle correct. :,,]

I'm also fixing/brainstorming up the second/third ending. This one will have two different areas you can navigate through to get an idea of where you are and a few hints of lore that will be referenced later on in the game. Those that have played the [Extended Demo] you probably know which ones I'm talking about. >;]

I already like the idea of them but for one of the paths, I didn't have enough time to branch it out and make backgrounds for it in the [Extended Demo] so here's a peek of a placeholder since I'm still sketching stuff out, nothing is finalized yet. :[]

Super close to the cabin section, yay! I actually miss writing/drawing out the segments in the cabin a whole bunch so I really can't wait to fix up that part once I'm done with the swamplands. :,,]

I said last week I'd post some of the new backgrounds/areas so here you go:

Kofi update:

I also had a small talk with my play testers and one of the things they brought up is that I should be promoting my ko-fi better so from now on I'll have little mini doodles doing so at the end of every game development post as a way to promote it! :] All donations and tips help tremendously while I work on the game. If you like what I create, please consider supporting what I do here! I was able to use previous tips to get a new wrist support brace when I'm drawing so a very big thank you to everyone who gave a tip! :,,]

Q&A / Ask box is open:

If you have any questions about Trembling Essence/Noah feel free to ask here or on itch.io please. This makes it easier for me to see and answer accordingly! I would really like to hear from you guys!

I enjoyed answering the asks I got recently this week! I'm trying to finish the rest when I can including the ones I remember that got deleted. There were some I genuinely couldn't answer because it would require me to mention major spoilers/the questions have spoilers in them. :,]

This post is getting really long now so that's all I have to discuss, thank you guys very much for all of the encouraging support this past week, I appreciate it a whole bunch! :,,]

[ilovecupcakesandtea]

My master list

Title: Lets bring this idiot home

Word Count: 12173

Archive Warnings: Temporary character death

Rating: M

Pairing(s): Eddie Munson/Steve Harrington Robin Buckley/OC

Character(s): Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley, The Party

Tags: Steddie, Steve Harrington. Eddie Munson. Robin Buckley. . Temporary Major Character Death

Beta Reader: Thank you so much to my awesome beta reader/cheerleader @slippy-slip I really could not have done this without you at all.

Art link and credit: Art is by the amazing @kokoshka67 as is the banner

Ao3 Link

AN: Working on this has been an absolute blast.

I wrote this for the @strangerthingsreversebigbang event and had a lot of fun doing so!!

Divider links: reblog and bats

Cold, that’s the first thing that Eddie felt when he woke up. Maybe felt wasn’t the right word, more experienced. He didn’t think he could actually feel anything. He was sure he should be feeling something. He should feel pain, he distinctly remembers being eaten alive by demobats making sure Henderson could get out of this hell pit and to help keep Steve, Robin and Nancy safe. 

He must be dead, that’s the only conclusion he could come to. Dead. Not even 20 yet and he was here, dead, in hell. People always did say he’d end up in hell.

“Jesus H Christ,” he said, sitting up and looking around. The place looked totally different now there was no lightning in the sky or thunder to be heard. The only thing that remained the same was the red sky and the ground under him. 

It was at this point he noticed that he was surrounded by bats, bats that he was sure had just been eating him, taking chunks out of his sides, arms and legs. But now they were just sitting there, looking at him. Watching him, rather unnerving really if you asked Eddie, almost as though they were waiting for him to do something, anything.

“Looks like everyone got out then,” he said out loud, for no reason other than to break the silence. He never did well with silence. 

“What the fuck,” he screamed as the bats all nodded back at him, as though they were actually replying to what he had said.

He scrambled to his feet as quickly as he could and moved off towards the trailer where the gate was. Reaching for the door with more force than he intended, he fell right through and landed back on the ground face first. 

“Christ,” Eddie exclaimed, sitting back up headfirst in the living room. 

So definitely dead, a ghost by the looks of it. First thing he had to work out was a way of interacting with the world around him, surely it was possible to do? It had to be, right?  

He took a second before standing up again to look around inside the trailer. It looked like the gate had closed. 

“Well fuck, guess I'm stuck here a ghost then,” Eddie sighed. 

Turning around he saw the bats had followed him. They were less scary when he looked at them now that they weren’t trying to eat him. 

“Well come on then, if you’re following me let's go and see what’s out there,” Eddie spoke to the bats. He was losing it already, talking to the damn bats.

Eddie started to float off in a random direction when the bats stopped in front of him, stopping him in his tracks. He started in another direction and they moved in front again. A third try had him stopped again. 

“Alright, alright you want me to go somewhere?” Eddie asked the bats flying in front of him, getting chirps in response. 

“Well I guess I’ve got nothing better to do, lead the way,” he gestured widely. 

The bats flew off slowly and looked back to make sure Eddie was following, giving what sounded like happy little chirps when he was. 

Eddie floated behind the bats all the way through Hawkins, through the woods and out the otherside where Riffer Rick’s could be seen.

Entering the house he was filled with emotions, all of the fear and the hopelessness that he felt the last time he was there all came back to him. Only hours beforehand he was in this place laying low because he was wanted for murder after watching the death of Chrissy Cunningham. 

The bats lead him further into the house and into Rick's bedroom, the last bed he lay on. On the bed lay his body, his mangled body with a torn shirt and missing flesh. 

“You really did a number on me huh?” Eddie laughed a humourless laugh. The bats gave off sad chirps in response. “Yeah I know, you had no choice, he made you. Thank you for making sure I rested comfortably though.” 

Eddie looked close at his body. He wondered if he could get his ghost back in there. Would there be a point if he did? His body has no heartbeat he was clinically dead, and even if he wasn't there didn't seem to be any way of keeping a human body alive down here long term.

As he was walking Eddie kept trying to touch different things, concentrating really hard on doing so. Wondering if the type of thing he was trying to touch made a difference or if him having any kind of connection to it helped. Everything so far had been a no. Everytime he touched something his hand went straight through it. His feet didn’t physically touch the floor and his whole body felt light. 

He wasn’t sure where to head for a while. Just wandering around Lovers Lake, seeing if there was anything that could help him at all. Nothing seemed out of place. With a heavy sigh Edidie headed into the town centre and ultimately towards Hawkins High. 

Walking across the football field Eddie headed towards the clearing that once held the picnic table he used as a meeting point for his drug deals. A place that he spent many hours sitting in, reading, drawing or listening to music. 

As he entered the clearing he noticed he wasn’t alone. Hovering by the picnic table was Chrissy. 

“Chrissy?” Eddie whispered, he hardly dared to believe he wasn’t alone in this hell. 

“Eddie?” She replied, moving towards him quickly. “Why are you here?!” 

“I died, apparently,” Eddie shrugged. “How long have you been here for?” 

“It’s hard to say, I’ve been kinda floating around the place, seeing what else and who else I can find,” she replied smiling

“Chris I need you to know I had nothing to do with your death, I tried to help. I am so sorry I left you. I’m so sorry that I couldn’t help you. Everyone misses you, they all love you so much. Jason led the whole town against me to avenge you. I promise if I could have done anything differently I would have,” Eddie cried. 

“Eddie, I know,” Chrissy whispered, placing her hand close to his face. “There was nothing you could have done, please know that.”

“But I ran away and left you there,” Eddie whispered.

“You watched me float to the ceiling and my bones snap, what could you have done?” Chrissy asked. 

“Nothing I guess,” he spoke softly in reply. “See, you did the right thing, you could have been next for all you know,” she smiled reassuringly at him. 

“Why are you here?” Eddie asked, gesturing around to the clearing. 

“This is the last place I remember thinking everything could still be ok. Like I had someone that was on my side and that I wasn’t completely losing my mind,” Chrissy replied simply. 

“Even though you saw something whilst you were here, you still felt safe?” Eddie questioned. 

“Yeah, you looked at me like you might actually believe me if I was to tell you what I’d been going through. You tried to make me laugh. Right until the end I felt safe with you Eddie,” she stated.

“I really really wish I could have saved you,” Eddie huffed, anger clear in his voice. 

They spent a while floating around the clearing and chatting, finding out more about each other. She told him about all the secrets of the basketball and cheerleading teams as they both giggled away. Eddie told her all about Hellfire and the campaign he had finished the evening he took her back to the trailer.  Chrissy told him about her family, her shitty mum and dad but also about her wonderful auntie and grandma who stood up to her mum whenever they could. Eddie told her about his own parents who skipped out on him for different reasons but also about Wayne who had taken him in and was better than a lot of dads he knew despite never wanting children of his own. 

The conversation changed to the upside down. Eddie asked Chrissy about what she could and couldn’t do down here and if she’d seen anyone else. 

“Yes actually I have, Barb Holland is around somewhere, the same with Fred and Patrick, I’ve seen them both as well. I’ve had a few good chats with Barb, she’s lovely, she was really helpful when I first ended up here. I can’t really interact with anything, my body seems to just go through it,” she replied. 

After saying their goodbyes and promising to see each other again very soon, Eddie decided to continue with his trip around Hawkins. Floating around the parts of the hospital he could, around the police station and around the arcade as well as everywhere else he could get into.

A while later, time had no concept anymore, neither light nor dark to tell night from day, no working clocks, probably for the best after Vecna, Eddie found himself back in Hawkins itself, followed by the bats who hadn’t seemed to want to leave him alone since he woke up. There was no one around at all, no cars even. Hell he wasn't really sure where he was heading, no real destination in mind. 

As Eddie floated through the centre of town he found the record store, as it looked in 1983, he walked through the door without opening it and started to look around. 

He saw posters advertising the newest Iron Maiden album at the time. The tour that Metallica were embarking on in the January of 1984. Suddenly it hit him. Surrounded by this ‘old’ music it showed him what he would be missing out on, what he would never have again. New music. He couldn't even touch things physically  so he didn't even have old music to listen to. He’d never play his sweetheart again. Never listen to the Master Of Puppets album again. The tickets for the Ozzy and Metallica show that Wayne had worked really hard to surprise Eddie with, wouldn't be used by him. Then there was the overwhelming emotional pain of missing Wayne. Did Wayne think he killed all those people? Wayne,  Eddie realised, would have come home from this shift, fully expecting to head to bed and then to go to sleep, to find the dead mutilated body of Chrissy Cunningham on the floor and Eddie gone. He couldn’t even remember what his last words to Wayne were.  

Eddie sat on the floor and screamed. Screamed for Chrissy, for Wayne, for Dustin, for Max. He beat his fists on the counter in front of him and was hit by the realisation that he was physically making contact with it, he was making noise against the front. It came as such a shock that he stopped screaming immediately, and then his hands fell right through again and back to his knee.

“Huh, that's an interesting development,” Eddie spoke. “Bet Henderson would be able to tell me what happened, I should probably go and find the little shit.” 

He headed in the direction of the Hendersons. Seeing Hawkins back in 1983 was really weird, not the weirdest thing to have ever happened to him but certainly up there. Eddie walked past shops that had long since closed down, or had moved locations. Places he had never been able to shop in he could now just walk into without the dirty looks.   

Eddie found the Henderson house, floated through the front door and saw straight away that this wasn’t the Henderson house. Someone else was very clearly living here at this point in time. Fuck.

As he floated away from the house, he had no idea where to go next. He wasn't sure how to contact the other side of the gate and he wouldn’t be able to touch anything if he could find it anyway. 

“Dustin saw me die didn’t he?” Eddie wondered out loud.

Once again the bats seemed to nod in response. That would always be weird. 

“So everyone else must think I’m dead?” He asked. 

Another nod.

“So they won't be coming back for me,” he whispered. 

He wasn’t quite sure how he knew this to be true but he was almost certain that if everyone was going to be anywhere, recovering from what they had gone through it was the Harrington Mansion. Luckily he knew they way, the parties back in the day had been very lucrative for his little side business. 

It took what felt like ages to float there. But finally, in front of him was the infamous Harrington Mansion, just as big as he remembered and with Steve's BMW sitting outside of it as well. Walking across the lawn and to the front door Eddie walked right through and into the entrance way. 

Eddie moved around the house slowly, trying to listen out for any sign of anyone on the other side of the vale. He tried shouting out for Henderson, for Steve, for Robin, for Nancy, for anyone. He tried moving things off the side but his hand just went through the items. It was then that he heard it, very faintly, but it was definitely there. Master of Puppets playing out to him from the other side. Now he was determined to make contact. 

“I’m alive!” He screamed, “Come back for me!” 

“Please,” he whispered. “Please find me” 

He finally remembered the one thing that he’d been told was always a sign of the Upside Down, lights. The kids, and older teens, had freaked out whenever any lights flickered. 

Eddie concentrated on the music he could faintly hear still and put his hand on the light switch, going through slightly but clearly making the lights in the hallway flicker. 

“What the fuck,” he heard.

It had been a very, very long 72 hours since they got out of the upside down and to the hospital. Various amounts of medical care were needed for everyone and aside from Max, Steve was kept the longest. His wounds had to be bandaged a couple of times before they would let him leave, the staff wanted him to stay for longer but suddenly being down staff members and up patient numbers meant they didn’t argue too much when Steve said he wanted to leave. Getting home was a blessing, Steve didn’t normally like the silence but a few minutes alone was needed. The dirty clothes in his bag needed to go straight into the washer so that's where he headed first. As he walked past the living room Steve caught the sight of the tape player they had all sat around before everything making mix tapes for everyone, just in case. He felt compelled to walk towards it, maybe to tidy it all up first. Sitting by the player he gathered everything together and made sure all the tapes were in the right cases. 

The last one, still sitting in the player, was Master of Puppets. Eddie had insisted on listening to it over and over again to make sure he knew it before going back into the Upside Down. 

Eddie, who was determined to graduate. Eddie who had been so full of life even at the end, wanting to be strong for Dustin. Eddie with his big brown doe eyes and his even bigger personality. Eddie, who even in the short few days Steve had really known him, had shown him a glimpse of a future. A future snuffed out with Eddie’s last breath. His first ‘round’ with the upside down and he ends up dead. Steve should never have forced Eddie and Dustin to be decoys, he should have sent them both home before they went to kill Vecna, they should have had another plan. Eddie should not have died in that horrid place. A victim like Chrissy, Patrick and Fred.

Turning the volume up on the player as loud as it could go he pressed play and let the music engulf him. He stood up and went about what he set out to do, putting his clothes in the washer. Everything was in, bar the vest. Steve stood holding the vest, just standing there looking at it. Leaving it on top of the washer Steve turned around to go about getting clean himself and then going to sleep when he saw it. The lights were flickering. He could hear that the song was coming to an end and the lights were flickering. 

“What the fuck,” he said outloud. 

This couldn’t be, the Upside own was finished. Vecna was dead and the gates all closed. Then he noticed it, the pattern, the lights were making 3 quick flickers 3 longer flashes and 3 quick flickers again. S.O.S. Could Eddie really be alive? 

The relief washed over him. If Eddie was communicating with him then he must be alive in some way. He needed to work out what to do, he couldn’t yet get everyone else involved, they were enjoying being at home with their families. No, he’d do this himself until he had to get everyone else involved with whatever rescue mission was needed. With the idea of a shower and sleep behind him now Steve grabbed a notebook and a pen and sat down at the kitchen table to write down everything he knew about the Upside Down, gates and anything else supernatural. 

It wasn’t until he heard the front door open that he looked up and noticed it was now dark outside. 

“Robbie?” Steve said into the darkness, closing the book and pushing it away from him.

“Yeah it’s me dingus, you ok? Sitting in the dark all by yourself,” Robin asked, concern obvious in her voice. 

“Yeah, I’m ok, I was just sitting here and didn’t even realise it had gone dark. What are you doing here anyway? Why aren't you with your parents?” He questioned, trying to change the subject.

“Wanted to make sure you’re ok, your parents aren’t here and I didnt want you to be on your own,” she replied, coming over and giving him a hug, “What's this?” Robin questioned poking at the notebook.

“It’s nothing,” Steve whispered, he needed her to leave this alone for now. 

“Steve, I’m not going to push, just know I'm here for you,” Robin said. 

“Thank you,” He replied. “Anyway don’t you have a date tonight?” 

“I called J and rescheduled, explained about the earthquake and everything and how I needed to help clean up and just needed to be with the family tonight,” Robin shrugged. “Want to watch a movie and judge everyone before we fall asleep on the couch and get really uncomfortable?” 

“I couldn’t think of a better way of spending the evening, shall we make some food first?” He suggested.

20 minutes later they were both sat down with Top Gun on and huge bowls of pasta.

“Kelly McGillis is so hot,” Robin sighed. 

“Not as hot as Tom Cruise,” Steve replied.

They couldn’t hear him or see him and he couldn’t see them or hear them any more but Eddie was in the room with them humming along to Master of Puppets hoping that someone had got his message earlier and that they were coming to save him.

The pair spent the rest of the evening watching films and judging everyone in them. However Steve couldn't shrug off the feeling he should tell Robin, at least she would probably know what to do. He was so grateful for her turning up to make sure he was ok though, he didn't have the heart to ruin it. He'd show her everything in the morning. 

Later that night they crawled into bed together and as per their custom Robin was the big spoon. She was tiny but they both felt better sleeping this way. They fell into a restless slumber, too exhausted to be kept awake by the horrors that they had seen but not settled enough for it to be restful. 

The next morning they woke up and made breakfast. Over an unusually quiet breakfast for the pair, Steve thought about what was written in his notebook. Having slept he felt better about letting Robin know what he had seen. Once toast had been eaten and coffee drank, Steve pushed the notebook towards Robin and stood up to do the dishes. "Steve, why does this page have Eddie's alive with a question mark at the top. And why is this followed by everything we know about the upside down and supernatural things in general?" Robin whispered. "The lights flickered," he answered simply. "Just like the S.O.S that Eddie told us about." 

"He was dead though babes, we all checked for any sign of a pulse, all over this body. There wasn't one," Robin countered. 

"Look, I know that, ok. I know the gate is closed and I know we all checked for a pulse and it wasn't there, but the lights flickered and it was S.O.S," he replied, pinching his nose to stop himself crying. 

"Okay, do we need to get everyone else involved?" Robin asked, believing him.

"Maybe later. Can we just have a think if there's anything I've forgotten before we let them know? They're all still just kids and they're with their families right now," he suggested.

"Of course we can," Robin smiled, cuddling into him from behind.

"I really hope he's alive Bobbie," Steve sniffled.

"Oh dingus, me too," she sighed.

"Steve, I know you don't want to get them involved just yet but if Eddie is down there on his own we need to help him. We both know we can't do this on our own, it wouldn't help anyone and we'd just get ourselves into danger. Would you want to tell them what happened when we both come back half dead?" Robin said after their second morning together.

"Yeah, I know. I'll radio them soon and get everyone here and see what they say," He sighed. "I just want them to be kids for once."

“Me too dingus, me too, but we need their help,” the girl responded, pulling him into a hug.

They both got showered and dressed for the day and then Steve radioed Dustin.

"Henderson, you there dude?" Steve spoke into the walkie.

"Steve? Everything okay?" came the static reply of Dustin seconds later.

"Gather everyone at yours in 30 minutes. I'm picking you all up and bringing you here," Steve said, trying not to sound as stressed as he felt. Was he really dragging them all back into this bullshit?

"Sure okay, guys check in if you heard that," Dustin responded.

Different variations of 'heard' could be overheard from the walkie as each party member said they would be there.

"Right, sit down, I need to tell you something," Steve started a little while later when all of the party were all sitting in the Harrington living room.

"Are you dying?" Dustin asked straight away.

"Did you get Robin pregnant?" Mike asked.

"Are you moving away?" Lucas questioned him.

"No, no, none of that. Especially the Robin being pregnant thing, she’s like my sister dude," Steve replied, already exasperated. 

"Well you've never had an issue fucking sisters," Mike retorted.

"Just yours Wheeler, just yours," Steve said straight faced.

"Just listen, please," Steve sighed. "A couple of nights ago when I got home from the hospital I was playing Master of Puppets at full volume and the lights flickered, like S.O.S, like Eddie showed us. I didn't hear anything but I know what I saw. I'm not clever enough to work this shit out on my own. I'm not asking anyone to come back down there if it's needed, I will do that alone. I just need help working out what's going on and how to go about fixing it."

"Oh yeah, like we're going to let you go back down there on your own," Dustin huffed, rolling his eyes. "So, which lights? Was it just the S.O.S or was it other flickering too? You said you didn't hear anything else but are you sure? Any kind of static from the radio? From the tape player? We need to see if we can contact the other side. Going to be a bit difficult if we don't know if Eddie is here or not. Like in the house still," Dustin rambled, question after question being thrown at Steve.

"Just the lights in the hallway that I saw, nothing else at all even vaguely weird. Robin did you hear anything or see anything last night or the night before?" Steve asked, turning to Robin for the last question.

"Nope," She responded, shaking her head.

Dustin's immediate reaction was to jump up and run to the light in question, clearly in the hopes to find some way of using them to communicate with Eddie.

"Okay so how do we talk to him?" Mike asked as he followed Dustin into the hallway.

"Can we even talk to him? Like if he's dead and a ghost or something will we be able to talk to him?" Dustin wondered out loud.

“Well he communicated with us so we should be able to talk back to him in some way. Like we did with the lite-brite the other day, we’ll figure this out ok. We need to. Eddie needs us again,” Steve pointed out.

“We could use the walkie talkie or a radio as a spiritbox type thing?” Robin suggested. “Kinda sweep the frequencies and see if we get anything at all from the upside down at all, it's kind of a different world like talking to a ghost would be.” 

The party spent the rest of the day going through different channels on their walkies and walking around the house trying to get something, anything. They had gone through all the channels and walked around the whole of the Harrington house getting nothing back. 

“I don’t think we’re going to get anything,” Will sighed. 

“What’s different now than when you saw the lights Steve?” Mike asked.

“Music!” Robin shouted, jumping up. “Sorry, Steve said when he saw the lights he had Master of Puppets on full blast.” 

“Yes! That’s it! Steve, where’s the tape and the tape player?” Dustin asked. 

Steve found them both and soon the opening notes were blasting from the speakers and around the house. 

They restarted their checks with the walkies, concentrating in the hallway, less than 3 minutes later and a walkie picked something up. 

" 'derson," came a crackly voice through the walkie that Lucas was holding in the hallway. 

“Holy shit Eddie! It’s Lucas, man is that really you?” the younger boy asked excitedly. 

“Older Sinclair! Man, it's good to hear your voice. Yeah it’s me,” came the staticky reply. 

“Lucas, what channel are you on?” Dustin demanded to know. 

“Eddie! Eddie, it’s me, It’s Dustin,” Dustin said into the walkie once he had tuned it right.  

“Henderson, I’m so fucking sorry,” Eddie replied quietly. 

“Dude, we’re going to fix this okay, we’re going to bring you home,” the curly haired boy said. 

“Operation Let’s Bring This Idiot Home has officially begun,” Robin laughed into her walkie. 

“Now I know I’m saved with the brain of everything helping the kids, is the brawn behind your brains helping too or is King Steve too busy?” 

“I’m here you jackass, stay close to whatever you’re using to speak to us. We could use your weird knowledge of things.” 

“Always happy to be a fountain of weird knowledge. I’ll stay where I am. Over and out for now,” Eddie replied before the music ended and the static of the radio started up again.

Eddie didn’t think anything would be able to wipe the smile off his face. Having human contact again after days of no one but bats to talk too and it being the people he went down fighting alongside felt amazing. Knowing that they wanted to help him potentially get back to the right side up gave him a feeling that he never thought he would feel again, hope. 

He wanted to go and wander around and explore more of the Upside Down, he wanted to know how far it spanned. Was it just Hawkins that was affected or was further afield having the same issues. He also wanted to be nosey in peoples houses, as much as his ghostly body would allow anyway. However he needed to stay close to the radio he had been able to communicate to them through. Unable to actually take it with him. 

He waited around for what felt like ages. He hoped someone would check in with some update or idle chit chat, but no, silence. The more the silence drew on and on the more the bad thoughts crept back in. Eddie had had time since ‘waking up’ to accept that this was his new normal but since the talk with the party he allowed himself to think about going home, about hugging Dustin again, seeing Wayne again, about 6 kids, a winnebago and a road trip.

Had they already forgotten about him? He couldn’t be sure how much time had passed with no way of gauging time of day. He also didn’t know if time worked the same down here as it did up there. Trying to convince himself that a large amount of time hadn’t actually passed was difficult but he had to try.

“Hey, guy’s, is anyone there?” He asked, touching the radio, which seemed to be the only way he could get it to work. 

Silence. 

No reply came at all, not even static. 

He sat and waited, speaking into the radio another few times, trying different things to see if that would help. He had no luck.

Eddie felt helpless again. 

The little bit of hope he had ripped away from him as quickly as it had come.

How was he going to recover from this now? He’s already come to terms with being stuck down here forever now but he’d, albeit for a brief moment, had hoped that that would change. 

“Eddie, you there man?” Steve asked later that evening, something told him he needed to check in with the other man. He couldn’t imagine how lonely it must be to be left alone down there. 

Nothing came back. 

“Munson, you there? It’s Steve,” Steve said again. “Harrington, Steve Harrington, just like in case you know another Steve.” Maybe he had been hanging out with Robin too long.

Still nothing. 

Has the connection they made been lost? Has something happened? Had Eddie just wandered away and couldn’t hear him? All kinds of thoughts ran through his head.

Steve was trying the radio over and over walking around the house. 

“Hey dingus, everything ok?” Robin asked, waking into the house and seeing him pacing. 

“I can’t get Eddie back again Robin, he’s gone,” Steve replied frantically, trying the radio one more time. 

“Okay, we can sort it,” she replied calmly. 

“What if he’s gone this time Bobs?” he whispered. 

“He isn't okay, we know this. It took us ages to get in contact last time. We can keep trying okay. You did forget the music though. I can’t say for certain that helps the link but it’s not a coincidence that the 2 times contact has been made that music was involved,” she reassured him, pulling him into a hug.

“You’re right, let’s get it playing and see if that works again,” he replied, breathing out the breath he felt like he’d been holding for ages. 

They got the tape playing and Steve tried again. 

“Hey Munson, you there man?” He asked again, hoping he sounded a lot calmer than he felt. 

“Steve Harrington as I, well, float in another worldly place,” Eddie replied, drawing out Steve’s name. “How can I help big boy?” 

“Just wanted to check in, see how you’re doing,” Steve replied, trying his best to hide his blush from Robin, the smirk on her face suggested he hadn’t been successful. “Guessed it must be pretty lonely down there, and it’s just me and Robin here right now” 

“I’ve made friends with the bats!” Eddie exclaimed, glee clear in his voice.

“The bats?!” Robin shouted after taking the walkie from Steve. 

“Yes, they’re not too bad when they’re not killing me,” he laughed, he could just imagine the look on both their faces. “Oh you’ll never guess who else is down here! I haven’t spent all that much time with her but we did spend some time together, Chrissy.” 

Steve looked at Robin straight away, he could sense the impending freakout before it happened.

“That’s great! Maybe we can errmm, talk to her sometime, I guess, like maybe. She probably doesn’t want to talk to me, or us I mean, she didn’t even know us really,” Robin rambled. 

“I get it Robin, she’s a very beautiful girl,” Eddie replied casually. Robin’s shoulders relaxed at being accepted without having to say the words. “I was always slightly more inclined towards the basketball team rather than the cheerleaders but I have been known to look their way.” 

Days passed and the group did research into all things to do with ghosts and discussed their collective knowledge of the Upside Down. Robin had made a couple of long tapes with Eddie's favourite songs once they realised that any music that Eddie connected with emotionally worked to bridge the gap between worlds. They left a tape running any time someone was awake and in the house. 

Everyone had gone home on the fifth day of brainstorming when Eddie’s voice came across the walkie that they had made sure could always be used by him. 

“Steve, you there?” he asked. 

“Yeah I’m here. Miss me already?”

“You weren't meant to figure it out,” Eddie laughed. 

“Secrets safe with me,” Steve responded with a laugh. “All jokes aside, everything ok? Need something?”

“Yeah, a huge favour actually. Can you help me keep everyone away from Riffer Rick's bedroom if you guys have to come down here. My, erm, physical body is in there. It’s not pretty and I don’t want anyone seeing that unless it can be changed.”

“Yeah, of course. If someone needs to go there it’ll be me,” Steve said, nodding as though he could be seen.

Almost two weeks later the party realised they had as much information as they could gather and the next step, they all decided, was heading down into the Upside Down. 

“I know you don’t want to but I think we’re going to need El involved in this. I’m not sure how we can open the gate without her,” Dustin declared. 

Everyone else agreed reluctantly and Mike gave her a call to fill her in on everything so far.

“I have sensed something a little different down there. I couldn’t quite work out what it was though, it didn’t feel evil. Just sad mostly, sparks of happiness but mostly sad,” El explained when she joined the group.

“Can you open the gate again so that we can go and see him?” Mike asked her. 

“Possibly yes, I can feel the one in the pool a little still so maybe I can open that one up again,” El replied.

“A gate in the pool?” Nancy whispered “Where it came and took Barb. I never thought about that.” 

“So El, you can open the gate up and we can head in, save Eddie and bring him home,” Dustin said cheerily. 

“Let’s take it one step at a time shall we?” Steve replied. 

Heading out into the back garden and over to the empty pool the group looked around to see if anything looked any different. 

“I can feel it the strongest here,” El said as she stood near the diving board. “I can open this gate up. I can’t feel anything dangerous and Eddie said that he hasn’t seen anything bad right?”

“Said he’d made friends with the bats,” Robin scoffed. 

El got ready and sat on the diving board. Taking a deep breath she closed her eyes, held her hands out and concentrated. The air suddenly felt heavier. A rip in the very fabric of the universe started to open and continued to spread. Once the gate was open fully El placed her hands by her side and opened her eyes again. 

“It’s open and I can’t feel anything bad in there,” El said as she took a tissue from Will who had rushed over to her. 

The silence was deafening. Any noise that there seemed to be before the gate was opened had disappeared. 

“Right, let’s get going then,” Dustin said, stepping forward. 

“Just me, Robin, Nancy and Jonathan are heading in ok. We can’t risk any of you but we’re all adults and have made this decision,” Steve said, one hand on his hip and the other pointing at each of the party in turn.

“Right, let's just go in and bring this idiot back,” Robin sighed, picking up her axe. 

They had spoken at length with Eddie about what creatures could be found down there. He’d said they were harmless but they couldn’t be sure what would happen when people who weren’t connected to the Upside Down entered. 

Steve went in first, trusty nailbat swinging by his side. Jonathan and Nancy followed him, Nancy with her shawnoff pointed dead ahead and Jonathan with a pistol in hand. Robin followed the group with her axe held ready to strike should it be needed. 

“Watch for the vines guys, don’t forget about the hive mind. We don’t know what connection they have now. Also we’re not sure what kind of connection they have to Eddie either so don’t hurt any of them because we don’t want to hurt him as well,” Robin rambled. 

“I hate this place, it’s no less creepy now than it was when we were last here fighting for our lives,” Nancy commented. 

“You weren’t joking when you said this place was stuck in ‘83. The Phillips still have that awful tree that always used to overhang the sidewalk,” Jonathan said looking around. 

“She was such a bitch too, always on at me and Tommy over something or other. Plus her cooking was lousy and they were always cheating on each other. Broke up 3 other marriages between them,” Steve replied off handedly. 

Walking around the Upside Down when something wasn’t trying to kill them was a whole new experience for each of them. This time the place was silent, all bar their footsteps and chatter. The sky was no longer red with lightning above them, no bats or other demo creatures were trying to kill them, just silence. They knew that Eddie had been spending a lot of his time at the Harrington residence as that was the only place they could communicate with him. So that’s where they headed too. 

“This is all suspiciously quiet down here. This has not been my experience of this place so far. Is this ok or are we walking into a trap? Oh shit. Did we ever take a second to check if this was actually Eddie? We all saw him dead, Steve you tried chest compressions and Nancy you checked for a pulse. What if we didn’t actually kill Venca and he’s bringing us down here hoping we come back down without much of a plan so he can kill us and get free?” Robin questioned. 

“Robs, it’s Eddie ok. Trust me,” Steve replied. 

The group continued to walk towards the Harrington residence without issue and finally they were there. 

“Munson, you here man?” Steve asked as he walked into the house. It felt so weird for him to be seeing the house as it was in ‘83, before everything started.

He could almost see a younger version of himself sitting on the couch watching something on TV. Or sitting with the book club he joined talking about their neighbours. 

“Yeah in your super posh living room,” Eddie said, interrupting Steve’s thoughts before they could spiral any further. 

They all walked into the living room with their weapons ready to attack if it wasn’t actually Eddie. 

“Guys, I’m a ghost. You can’t kill me any further and a nail bat or gun isn’t going to get rid of me,” Eddie laughed. 

“I brought an iron poker as well,” Robin declared, unhooking it from her belt. 

“A wise woman, Buckley, but please keep it away from me. We don’t actually want me to disappear,” Eddie said, moving further away from her.

“The weapons were for more fleshy creatures than yourself, no offence obviously,” Nancy pointed out. 

“I told you they're all harmless, nothing will hurt you. Venca is dead. I can’t feel him at all and the bats agree,” he sighed.

“Right so Eddie is officially a ghost, we don’t know where his body is, we don’t know what state that body is in, and we have no way of getting ghost Eddie back into human Eddie even if parts 1 and 2 weren’t an issue, which they are,” Robin spoke up. 

“I, erm, know where my body is. The physical one anyway but parts 2 and 3 are still an issue so,” Eddie said sadly.

“Let's go and see what we’re dealing with then,” Nancy said, turning to leave clearly having already made up her mind that they were heading to Eddie’s body next. 

“I think we should ask Eddie what he wants to do about his body. He should be given the choice as to who gets to see him like, well, that,” Steve shrugged. 

“Thank you Stevie. I just want you guys to know that bits of the flesh are missing. It’s clearly a very dead body ok. It’s not pretty. None of you need to see it if you don’t want to, I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t. I asked Steve to keep the kids away so they didn’t have to see it but I would really consider if you want to see that or not,” Eddie said before the group could move too far. 

“Thanks for the heads up Eddie but if we’re going to fix this at least one of us that can go right side up needs to see your body so we know exactly what needs to be done,” Nancy nodded at him.

“Lead the way then,” Robin said. 

The group all left the Harrington house and started their way through the woods towards Riffer Rick's place. Their surroundings stayed as quiet as it was when they entered the Upside Down a few minutes prior. The bats follow at a safe distance behind them. 

“I don’t like that they’re following us at all, it’s really creepy,” Robin pointed out. “Can they stop please?’

“They don’t like you guys being down in their territory either. Last time you were here you guys set fire to things and did a lot of harm. Plus killing their master,” Eddie shrugged. “They’re not going to hurt you though if you don’t do anything.”

“Does this pose a future issue of getting your body out of here? Is that maybe something we need to be careful of?” Jonathan questioned as they reached the house and walked inside.

“I don’t think so but maybe we need a game plan for that happening,” Eddie replied. “Right, I’m in the bedroom, I mean my body is in the bedroom. Please remember what I said earlier about what’s in there before you just walk in.”

“I’ll go and look, no one else needs to join me if they don't want to,” Nancy said, walking towards the bedroom. Steve followed behind her.

A few minutes later Nancy and Steve both walked back out. 

“The first issue would be the fact your body has no blood in it but it doesn’t actually look like it's started to decompose which is good,” Nancy declared. “We’d have to close up  the wounds. Get at least 5 pints of blood into you and restart your heart.”

“Not a lot then, we could get all of that done in an hour or so right?” Eddie deadpanned. “Let's face it guys, we can't do that. My spiritual being is outside of my body and we have no way of fixing that. I’m dead and I’m staying dead. Is there any chance someone could explain all this enough to Wayne so I can speak to him again though please?”

“Yeah of course, anything to help,'' Robin replied. “Should we have a look around? Make sure Vecna/ Henry / 001 is dead? May as well make sure the job is done.” 

“Sure, let's head over to the Creel house and check it out,” Jonathan shrugged.

The group walked back into Hawkins and through the town and passed the Memorial Hospital.

“We could burn it down?” Robin suggested, nudging Steve, as they walked past Family Video.

“We could always burn the school down instead?” Eddie countered as they went past Hawkins high.

Finally they were walking up the path towards the Creel house. 

“I know we’re all thinking it and I just want you all to know that even if we can’t get this situation fixed I appreciate you all trying. It means a lot that you all came down here to try and help, even though you had no idea what was waiting for you when you got here. So yeah, even if I’m still a ghost at the end of all this, Thank you,” Eddie said as the group made its way inside the creepy house. 

“This really is an awful place. I can still feel the vines around me,” Robin commented with a shudder. 

“There’s so much cool shit in this house that I want to explore but I can’t physically pick anything up which sucks,” Eddie said, looking around the hallway. “Buckley, can you help me explore?” 

“Don’t touch anything yet, we still need to make sure this place is safe,” Nancy spoke up.

“It’s safe,” came a voice from behind them. 

“Hey Chris, you know everyone right?” Eddie greeted Chrissy. 

“I know faces, but not everyone’s names. I know you, obviously. Steve from basketball and Robin from band, really wish I’d gotten to know you better Robin,” she spoke softly. “I’m really sorry but I don’t know either of your names,” she apologised, turning to Nancy and Jonathan. 

“I’m Jonathan Byers and this is Nancy Wheeler,” Jonathan smiled awkwardly.

“Right, now we’ve all been introduced, can we have a look around this place now. See what kind of things could be taken back to the right side up or just fun things down here,” Eddie declared. 

The group spent lots of time looking around each room in the house, after Chrissy had helped Eddie learn how to float up the stairs. The last room they looked in was an old library filled full of very old books and some handwritten texts. They spent time looking through each of them seeing if there was anything that could be useful to anything. 

“Erm guys, I think I may have found something,” Robin spoke up. “It certainly isn’t a normal book, looks super old and it’s giving me a really weird feeling.”

“Let’s have a look,” said Steve, walking up beside her and taking the book from her and looking through. 

“Open it!” Eddie insisted, a manic look on his face as he was on the other side of Robin.

“Alright, alright,” Robin sighed.

Instantly a ghostly green glow started to come from the book. 

“This is amazing,” Eddie cackled. 

“We need to close this book now and hope that it didn’t do any damage to either the Upside Down or the Right Side Up,” Robin said, trying to close the book.

“We should have a look through it to see if it can help any. If any book in here can, it's this one,” Steve pointed out.

“Have neither of you seen The Evil Dead? Nothing good can come from using this book for anything,” She sighed. 

“Can we at least look through it to see? This could be my only hope to fix all of this,” he asked, gesturing to himself. 

“Fine,” Robin sighed. “But I 100% reserve the right to say I told you so when this all goes wrong.” 

“Let’s take this back and get the party to look through it, see if those nerds can find something in it,” Steve suggested.

The group headed back out of the Creel house after finishing their look around and headed back towards the gate and the right side up. 

“We’ll keep in contact over the walkie as normal and we’ll come back and see you if we can’t get this sorted quickly,” Steve said, having to keep his hand still to stop himself from reaching out to touch Eddie. 

“Yeah ok Stevie, I’ll sit by the radio waiting for your call,” Eddie smiled shyly. “See you guys soon, yeah?”

“Bye Robin, good to see you,” Chrissy said, waving at the other girl. “Bye guys,” she finished and then floated away.

“Erm Buckley you got a sec?” Eddie spoke up as Robin just stood and looked at the space where Chrissy had been. 

“Sure, what’s up?” She asked, shaking herself and stepping towards him. 

“I’m not sure if you were being serious earlier about speaking to Uncle Wayne about all of this. But it really would mean the world to both me and him if we could talk again, even if it’s just one last time,” Eddie spoke nervously.

“I said I would and I will, ok. As soon as we know exactly what is going on with you I’ll talk to him. No need to upset him with you being dead if we can bring you back,” she smiled. 

“I owe you one, seriously. Once I’m all ok, whatever you want, just ask,” Eddie said

“Just take care of him ok, he’s not as strong as he makes out. That’s all I ask in return.” 

“What?” Eddie stammered. “I don’t know what you’re on about.”

“Yes you do. I’m not going to say a word though,” She nodded. 

Eddie nodded in response and turned to float away again. 

Back at the Harrington house the party, along with Steve, Robin, Nancy and Jonathan sat down with the book. Dustin had previously made sure that a walkie had been made so that the button didn’t have to be pushed in to talk to Eddie.

They spent the rest of the day and some of the following day having a read through the book to see if anything was useful. 

“There’s a whole section in this book dedicated to exorcisms. Eddie, you’d love that! You can shout Latin at people and they’ll think you’re cursing them but you’re really just telling demons to get away,” Dustin laughed.

“Oh dude that sounds amazing! You’ll have to show me when we get all of this fixed,” Eddie replied, clearly also very entertained by the prospect. 

“Hey, wait here a second!” Dustin exclaimed. “I actually think I’ve found something! There’s something in here called the Transmutational Resurrection Spell. The Latin incantation translates to ‘Restore the blood. Restore the flesh. Restore the bone. Bring the spirit and warm the body. After death, made whole again.’ This could be useful, it would need Eddie’s blood though which I don’t think we have.” 

“Is it a good job one of the 6 languages I speak is Latin?” Robin sighed, “Write it down for me please Steven then I can start learning it.” 

“I, erm, still have his battle vest and I was wearing it whilst I tried to do CPR, that should have some of his blood on it still,” Steve said sheeplishly. “I didn’t have time to put a wash on okay! Things happened very quickly once I got home,” he defended.

“We need to discuss what we do if this works and what we do if this doesn’t work. We can’t just go into this with no plan at all,” Nancy spoke up.  

“This is starting to sound like a DnD quest,” Eddie laughed. “If this doesn’t work then that’s okay. We tried, well you guys tried.” 

“Stop with that shit okay,” Steve huffed. “You were the only reason we know you’re down there. You did the S.O.S on the lights and got us to look around the Creel house. So stop with that self-deprecating bullshit, okay, it’s not cute.”

“Yeah, ok Stevie, just for you.” 

The group spent the rest of the afternoon talking through the best way to get Eddie’s soul back into his body and then to get his body, alive, out of the hell pit that is the Upside Down. Nancy and Jonathan took the party and Robin home and left Steve alone at the start of the evening. He made something to eat, changed the tape in the player and moved everything to be as close to the love seat so that he could curl up with some food and talk to Eddie. 

“Hey Eds you there?” he asked. 

“Yeah I’m here Stevie, everything ok?” came the reply. 

“Everythings fine. Just wanted to check in with you, seen as it's just us now,” Steve responded.

“Got me alone, have you sweetheart?” Eddie chuckled. “I’m not that kind of girl Stevie, need to wine and dine me first.” 

“It’s a date,” he responded, not really thinking and feeling his cheeks heat up as he realised what he’d said. 

“As soon as I’m fit enough we can work out the details of that date, yeah?” Eddie hummed.

“Once I’m finished with my food, do you want me to read something to you? I’m sure there’s something here I could read for you if you wanted me too?” Steve asked, trying to keep his cool when all he wanted to do was kick his legs and giggle. 

“That really would be great. Anything you have, takeaway menus included, I will happily listen too,” Eddie replied, a smile clear in his voice.

The rest of the evening consisted of talking through everything, from how they were actually dealing with everything to what Eddie's first meal would be when he could eat again. A conversation spurred on by Steve actually reading the takeaway menus to him through lots of laughter and silly voices. 

Lying in bed that night, for the first time in days, Steve felt hopeful for the future. There was no doubt that he liked Eddie as more than friends, the physical attraction to the other man had always been there. After spending time with him over the last few days though and talking to him for hours tonight there was no ignoring that the attraction ran deeper than how good Eddie looked.

A banging on his front door the following morning woke Steve up. 

“Is the world ending again?” He asked as soon as he opened the door, showing Robin to be on the other side. 

“Yes actually my world is ending ok Steven so a little sympathy would be great right now, thank you,” she replied, walking into his house and heading to the kitchen. 

“What’s happening?” He asked, following her into the kitchen and starting to make coffee. 

“I still like Chrissy but I spent the evening with J and I really like J too. It’s a mess,” she replied, helping him make coffee by getting their favourite mugs out and grabbing the sugar and creamer. 

“Ok,” he responded, clearly thinking his next words through. “Does J know about what happened? I’m assuming you weren’t silly enough to tell her everything but does she know what’s in the press?” 

“Yeah, she does. She’s mentioned it in passing a couple of times but never pressed for anything.” 

“So maybe being honest with her is the best way to go?” he shrugged. “It’s not like you’re looking to move in together next week, get married the week after and adopt 4 kids and a cat by Christmas. You could tell her that you really enjoy seeing her exactly as you are but that you really need to keep it at this pace for a little bit?”

“What if she’s not ok with it?” She whispered. 

“Then she’s no good for you anyway. You’re not telling J that you were in love with Chrissy or that you two were in a relationship. You’re telling her that you had the feelings for someone who is unfortunately now dead and that it’s caused a bit of emotional conflict within yourself and you wanted to make her aware of this,” he said, passing her a cup of coffee. 

The pair sat down at the breakfast bar and ate cereal chatting away, catching up on the gossip that Robin had heard from her mom last night. 

“I think I have feelings for Eddie,” Steve whispered as he was washing the dishes. 

“That’s ok. Thank you for telling me,” Robin replied, leaning her head into him as she was drying the dishes he was washing. “He’ll be back with us soon and you can woo him with romantic metal songs and pretty painted miniatures.”

“You really think so?” He asked.

“Yes, no doubt about it. Pull out all your best moves and he’ll be yours before you know it,” she smiled. “Anyway, I’ve spent most of the night awake learning that incantation and I think I have it nailed. Dustin said that he and the rest of the party were meeting early at the Wheeler’s house so that they can make sure they know what else is needed for this to work and Nancy said that she was going to look into ways of making sure we could bring Eddie home at least alive enough.” 

Steve got ready for the day and before 10am he had a living room filled with everyone again, all talking over each other about the plan they had concocted. 

“One at a time please,” Steve shouted loudly over them all.

Calmly Will explained the plan. They would move Eddie’s body close to the open gate, Robin would perform the incantation and then Nancy and Jonathan would perform any immediate medical intervention needed. Nancy having stocked up on supplies at the drugstore on their way over to Steves. 

Gathering everything together, weapons included, the group headed towards the gate again. 

“Good morning everyone, to what do I owe this pleasure?” Eddie asked cheerfully as the group headed into the Harrington home and found him in the living room. 

“Eddie!” Dustin shouted running towards the other man, catching himself short of trying to hug him.

“Hey Henderson, missed you too,” Eddie beamed.

“Shall we get this all started?” Nancy suggested “Not wishing to break up this reunion but we really should try and see if we can get Eddie back into his body as soon as possible.” 

“Yeah Nance is right, let’s head over to Rick’s and bring Eddie back to the gate entrance and sort this all out ok,” Robin agreed. 

Walking back over to Rick’s, Steve was trying to think of a way that they could move the body but still keep Eddie’s wish of the party not seeing him like that. 

“Erm, Nance, Jon, can I grab you both for a second? You guys carry on,” Steve shouted. “Eddie requested that I don't let the party see his body, he doesn’t want to be remembered like that. Do you have any wipes with you Nance and I can clean his face off? And Jon will you help me carry him? I thought we could cover all but his face with a sheet and carry him like that. Means that all anyone will be able to see is his face.”

“Yeah I’ve got some in the bag ready to clean any wounds but we can clean his face off first,” Nancy replied. “It’s a really good idea Steve”

“And sure, I’ll help you carry his body. Sounds like the best idea to have him wrapped in a cover anyway,” Jonathan agreed. 

“Thanks guys,” Steve smiled at the pair.

As they all reached the house Steve stopped them all.

“I want you all to stay out of the bedroom okay, no questions asked, just do as I say.” Steve said, hands on hips making eye contact with each as he spoke.

They all entered the house and Steve, Nancy and Jonathan went towards the bedroom ready to get Eddie’s body cleaned up and moved. 10 minutes later and the three walked back out into the main part of the shack with the body bundled up in a blanket and being carried between Steve and Jonathan. 

“I’ll go ahead and keep a lookout for anything trying to attack us if everyone else can kind of spread out around Jonathan, Steve and Eddie with Robin at the back?” Nancy suggested as the group filled back out of the shack. They all nodded their approval of her plan. 

All of a sudden there was an almighty screeching sound followed by the sound of the bats taking flight. Nancy raised her gun ready to shoot and the others stood around with their various weapons raised ready to fight. 

“Please don’t hurt them, can you all lower your weapons?” Eddie shouted quickly. “Hey guys, my friends are helping me okay, they’re not doing anything to hurt me.” he said more calmly, addressing the bats this time. 

The bats stopped screeching and settled back onto the fencing by Rick’s. 

They got Eddie’s body to the edge of the gate and placed it down on the sheets and blankets they had placed on the ground earlier. 

Eddie got as close as he could to his body, Robin knelt next to it and held the vest in her hands.

“Restituo sanguis. Restituo carnes. Restituo os. Afferte spiritus et calidum corpus. Post mortem, natus totum iterum.” She chanted over and over again.

At first it didn’t seem to be doing anything and then all of a sudden his soul was pulled back into his body and everything went black to him and his ghost vanished from sight for everyone else. 

Eddie lay on the ground still covered in the blanket for what felt like hours. Not moving or even awake, just laying there. 

“He’s got a pulse, it’s strong and his breathing is good too, I think he just needs some rest.” Nancy said, standing back up from checking Eddie over again. 

“Let’s get him out of here and into the house. He needs to be warm and comfortable and to be somewhere safe. Who knows what could still happen whilst we wait for him to be okay enough to move.” Steve suggested. 

Between Steve and Jonathan they picked Eddie up and carried him to the house. Getting him onto the sofa. 

“Should we bring a mattress downstairs so that when he wakes up he doesn’t need to move around so much to get everything he’ll need? You have a bathroom and everything down here plus the kitchen and access to the outside.” Robin suggested. 

“Yeah, yeah that’s a really good idea! My dad’s old office is empty, we can set a bed up in there. I’m sure my parents have an old bed frame they took apart and never got rid off and I know there’s a spare mattress as well. Some of you shitheads want to come and help me make a bedroom for Eddie?” Steve asked. 

They all agreed and everyone but Nancy, Robin and El,  went to help Steve. 

“Is Steve ok?” Nancy suddenly asked, turning to Robin. 

“Erm, yeah, I mean as well as any of us really are I guess” Robin replied. 

“Good, I worry about him is all. He seems to really like Eddie though. Not sure I’d ever say I'd describe someone looking at a ghost as longingly, but he does.” Nancy chuckled. 

“Damn, you think Harrington preferred me as a ghost?” Eddie suddenly rasped out from where the girls were sitting beside him. 

“Eddie!” Robin gasped, reaching over to touch him. “How are you feeling?” 

“Like I was a chew toy for a load of bats and my soul was thrown back into my body” he replied smiling weekly. 

“I'll grab you some pain relief and some water,” Nancy said, standing up and rushing from the room. 

“Hello Eddie, it's good to finally meet you in your physical form” El smiled, waving slightly. 

“Supergirl!” Eddie grinned as best he could. “Thank you for everything” 

“Ed’s” a whisper came from the doorway.

“Hey Stevie, “ Eddie replied sheepishly. 

“You’re okay” Steve breathed out, as though he had been holding his breath. 

“All thanks to you big boy.” the other boy smiled. 

“Erm El, shall we erm go and see if anyone is hungry or thirsty and sort some food and drink if needed” Robin said, gently taking El by the hand and leading her out the room. 

“We’re setting up a bedroom for you in the office, unless you have somewhere else you’d rather stay whilst you recover?” Steve said, stepping further into the room. 

“No, nowhere else I’d rather be” He smiled, attempting to sit up, only to fall back down again. 

“Lie back down and let's get some pain relief in you shall we.” Nancy ordered as she walked back into the room carrying a syringe. “IV morphine” she shrugged, nodding at it.

“Yeah, that sounds amazing to me. I’m not even going to question where you got it from or how much you have.” Eddie laughed before wincing in pain.

Eddie fell back asleep again within 5 minutes of having the morphine and spent the next 4 hours flat out, only waking up again because of the pain. 

Waking up with a wince and a groan he looked around the room the best he could. 

“Hey, I’m here, don't panic and don't try to move okay. Is the pain back again?” The voice of Steve came from behind him and seemed to be moving closer before it entered his vision. 

“Yeah the pain’s back again and this couch isn’t the most comfortable to have been lying on for hours.” 

“Okay, let's get you moved into your bedroom, sorry if it smells of cigar smoke and bourbon in there by the way. It was my dads office slash escape from the wife and kid room. Let me just go grab some more hands and we can get you moved okay.” Steve said as he left the room. 

He returned a couple of minutes later with Robin, Jonathan and Nancy following him. 

“We’re going to get you moved and then I’m going to give you more pain relief after we’ve got you settled. Let's start with getting you sat up shall we?” Nancy suggested.

With Steve taking the shoulders and Jonathan taking Eddie’s legs the two of them slowly and smoothly sat him up. 

“Jesus Christ that hurt so fucking much” Eddie said through gritted teeth, tears clear in his eyes. “Can we try the standing now” 

The two boys sat either side of him and placed his arms around their necks and their arms gently as they could around his waist. 

“On three, let's stand and then take a second.” Jonathan said, looking at Steve and Eddie, receiving nods from them both and then counting to three. 

With a lot of whimpering the four of them got Eddie moved and settled onto the bed and comfortable again.

“Here I’ve got some more pain relief for you.” Nancy informed as she entered the bedroom again. “We’ve been able to make you alive again and physically restore any flesh the bats took but you were still dead for over a week. Your body has not moved for almost all of that time. You’re going to be stiff and tired for a few days. Rest up and make sure you don’t push yourself. I believe Robin is on the phone to Wayne now. She’s not telling him you were dead and then alive again, she's just telling him that you’ve been found and are hurt but alive and here.”

“He’s on his way here now” Robin updated them both as she came into the room. “How you feeling now you’re in bed?” 

“Exhausted honestly. I’m so grateful to you for calling Wayne though and getting him to come over.” He replied. 

Once the morphine kicked in again Eddie fell back asleep.

Waking up again he was aware of someone sitting next to him with their hand on his arm. 

“Uncle Wayne?” Eddie rasped. 

“Yeah it’s me Ed’s. Need some water? We can help you sit up.” Wayne answered.

It was only then that Eddie noticed someone else was also sitting next to him, but on the other side of the bed. 

“Please,” Eddie smiled.

Some puffing and panting later Eddie was sitting up propped up by pillows and being helped to take a drink by Wayne. 

The rest of the evening was taken up by catching up with Wayne and the party who all filtered in inturn. Steve not leaving his side for more than 5 minutes at a time. 

The following day everyone went home to be back with their families and Eddie spent most of the day sleeping after being assisted to get into the shower and to wash and dry his hair. In the evening he was helped out into the living room. Sitting on the coffee table was Chinese takeout. Sweet and sour chicken, roast pork fried rice and prawn crackers all sat next to other containers. 

“You remembered '' Eddie whispered, sounding choked.

“What you wanted as your first meal back? Yeah of course I did. I didn’t think you would be up to it last night but figured you’d be ok with it tonight.” Steve shrugged, hoping his blush was hidden.

The boys sat and ate their take out, chatted and watched a couple episodes of The Golden Girls, naturally laughing and gossiping about their favourite characters all the way through. As the evening wore on and both boys became more and more tired they got closer and closer on the couch. 

“We should get you back into bed” Steve suggested at the end of their 5th episode. 

“Yeah ok, let's get moving” Eddie sighed. 

They got Eddie back into bed much easier than they had the evening before. A couple days of rest and pain relief having worked wonders. 

“You have more pain relief on the nightstand as well as a couple of bottles of water and a couple snacks.” Steve pointed to everything in turn. “Right, I'll leave you to it.” 

“Stay?” Eddie whispered. “It was really lonely down there on my own.”

“Yeah, sure, if you want me too,” the other boy smiled.

Eddie shuffled out of his trousers and shirt before scooching further down into the bed. He was joined by Steve after he had taken his own trousers and shirt off. 

“Good night Ed’s” 

“Night Stevie.” 

The following morning both men woke up tangled together and feeling much more rested than they had in days. Steve turned slightly so he was laying on Eddie's chest and hoped that the other man was still asleep so that he could enjoy this a little longer. He froze when arms pulled him closer and he realised that the other man was clearly not asleep. 

“Morning” Eddie rasped, sleep still in his voice. 

“Morning” came the shy reply, Steve still hoping to not break the spell.

“I don’t mind you know” 

“That’s good, because I really like it here” Steve said, ever so glad Eddie wouldn’t be able to see how red his cheeks were. 

“Get up here and look at me?” Eddie asked. 

Reluctantly Steve leaned up and looked at Eddie.

“You really are so beautiful, I’ve always thought so” Eddie mumbled, almost to himself.

“I was so fucking upset when I thought you were gone, can’t believe you’re back” Steve choked out, over come with emotion towards the man in front of him.

“I’m here and I’m yours, if you want me that is” 

“Of course I do.” Steve said, moving up Eddie’s body and leaning over him slightly.

“Then kiss me,” Eddie whispered.

Their lips met in the most tender and love filled kiss that Steve had ever felt. This was home. This was forever. 

3 Months Later:

“Ed’s come on! We need to get going or we’re going to be late” Steve shouted from the living room as he was getting his shoes on.

“Down in a second, I want to look my best for our first public outing as a couple and our first double date with Robin and J.  

“Let’s go then sweetheart” Eddie said, walking down the stairs ready to go 5 minutes later. 

“Let’s go. The first of many dates” Steve smiled, pulling his boyfriend into a kiss.

[beltransadie]

Small tidbits about my Still Into You 2ha animatic

Coz it's April, exactly one year from now was when I started completing it and I'm in the mood now. + I don't think I made a proper one + it won the twitter poll

Check it out if you're interested... or not! I just want to dump my thoughts and fun facts that I thought of while making this.

To preface this, check them out if you haven't seen it yet: (Still Into You & Please Don't Leave Me)

If you've been hanging around my blog for a while, it's kinda evident that I did post a promo post for Still Into You back in January 2023. And that first part does have an in-depth explanation about what it covers (which is from the start to the first chorus).

If you're wondering why: TL;DR I can't work on An Act of Kindness coz I was back home from school for vacation and I thought of the idea during a trip.

Anyway, I ramble. Time to get to the actual discussion.

(spoilers!!) The Actual Discussion

Making the rest of Still Into You, unlike Mo Ran's feelings for CWN, was actually just straightforward. I already knew that it'd cover the rest of the book, given that I intentionally focused heavily on book 1 while making part 1.

Like part 1, part 2 was that type of animatic that just naturally flowed during the storyboarding and rough sketch process. The whole animatic is divided into three phases which covers the following: Book 1, Book 2 and 3, and lastly the Epilogue.

Book 1 I've already discussed in an earlier post here but I did find this interesting tidbit I wrote to my cousin:

Anyways the discussion:

Yeah I really wish I have a funny image to put here. I'm really enjoying looking back at my stuff and seeing my initial plans though.

Order at which I made each part.

One thing of note (and actually a common oversight I experience while doing storyboards coz I don't do timings) was that I storyboarded the frames when the vocals started and forgot the timings in between.

So I kinda had to fill the parts between part 1 and 2 last-ish? (don't really remember the proper timings).

Oh, oh! And another fun fact:

Still Into You Part 2 (Rough Draft)

Part 2 was initially done on my tablet in CSP so there's a whole different and rougher version of it. (pls lower the volume if you're wearing earphones)

Funnily enough, this took me like one sitting to finish and a whole lot of sessions to clean up. I do like this process though given that, around the time I drew this, I started leaning heavily into animation and prioritizing getting my thoughts across without care for cleanliness. (Something I felt held me back too much while making Please Don't Leave Me).

In fact, there are some obvious frames that I didn't really bother polishing up (mostly because they're too hard for me or they just flash by quickly). A glaring example is this frame from the third part:

Another fun fact about the scene where TXJ shows CWN the plant he's been raising is it's actually inspired off of a doodle I made for someone in the Two Lifetimes CSE back in April 16 2023.

I just really think that it's super adorable for them. Mo Ran in the the epilogue section alternates between TXJ and 2.0.

Aside from the plant, TXJ also appears in this frame which is inspired from one of the extras. Another silly intentional decision I did is to have him pour alcohol onto a cup and drink from the bottle.

Meanwhile 2.0 appears here:

The one on the left is also from (you guessed it) an extra! It's based from an offhand mention that CWN makes in one of them. (Let me know what your guesses are haha)

I kinda just jumped into the 3rd half of the song, huh? I hope my ramblings aren't too much! I just wanna let it flow naturally.

Returning to the topic of the storyboard, I really only had a rough idea of what I wanted for the 3rd half. The references to the extras and even Goutou's appearance just came when I was already putting it into frame. Like, this was what I initially had in mind for the 2nd chorus to the end.

I think one of the notable differences is that I initially planned on doing the half MR half CWN screen transition the same way i did with chorus 1 and 2 but decided against it. In retrospect, I think it fits a lot because both aren't divided anymore.

Something about the second verse + chorus of the song

Like in chorus 1 and chorus 3, this section of the song takes on a darker tone since it covers book 2 going into book 3. It's a lot to talk about so I'm gonna select a couple that I personally like that's worth mentioning and leave the rest to the viewers to guess.

Also sorry not sorry for those who got spoiled by the animatic lmao.

The confession scene

Another fun fact: The confession scene in Still Into You and Please Don't Leave Me are intentionally connected through the color palette.

It's just that Still Into You takes a dump at how it treats it. Yes, the stick figures are intentional. It adds to the funny and tbh Still Into You really is just a feel good animatic. The comedy also serves as a whiplash to the angst hell that is the chorus 🥰.

(Insert obligatory CWN running at a tree meme here)

My Favorite 2ha Moment

Gotta insert my favorite chapter here (ch 184) which I think is one of 2ha's peaks because it resolves CWN's doubts about MR's feelings all this times.

And I'm just soo glad I could incorporate it in an animatic because it's so important to me. AND Like, 'yknow, I think it echoes the song very well because guess what MR tells CWN then?

“It has always been you."

That one frame before the chorus

There's like this moment before the second chorus starts where MR tells CWN something. I wanted it to echo ch 207 where MR felt the pressure of having to reveal that he actually is reborn and has memories of his past life.

If this were animated I'd have had MR match the song and tell CWN "I'm still into you".

Anyways, here's the frame before it zooms in. Physically it's still at ch 207, but I wanted the shadows to imply what happens next which is the chorus.

Other Bonus stuff

Ran out of stuff I wanna gush about so Imma talk about cut content.

XM and the MHX twins are supposed to have more frames (I didn't include it because it felt like it had too much energy)

2. Ling'er and the village ranwan visits during farm arc is also supposed to make an appearance

3. I forgot to animate the butterflies

4. I was supposed to polish the sequence at 2:41 - 2:51 at one point.

5. Fuck ow

6. CWN was supposed to glomp MR at the reunion scene

7. You and I

anyways go watch it

[acourtofthought]

I'm sorry, but I have to disagree with you on your last ask.

"SJM did say she's excited to write Az's journey. But she's tricky with her words and just because she said "when you get to the end of SF I think you'll know who the next book is about and Az's journey is one I'm very excited to write about."

Because SJM is tricky with words, she could be telling us that Elain's book is next, she'll end up with Lucien and during their book she will continue laying crumbs for Az's journey as she's excited to begin the groundwork for his eventual book."

please... she is not THAT tricky. She also said multiple times Hunt and Bryce are mates, and that she wanted to change up her usual formula by making the first LI in CC to be the endgame, still many doubted her words and guess what? Hunt and Bryce are endgame, just as she said. Was she also tricky when she talked about Elucien being mates? Or is she not tricky with her words when it supports your narrative?...

And to be exact, this was the question from the interview you quoted:

"Will Azriel get his own book in the future?" to which Sarah answered: "I can't say anything officially right now... but when you get to the end of ACOSF I think you'll know who the next book is about... Azriel's journey is one I'm very excited to write about..." - mind you, the question wasn't about who's book is next, just if Azriel will get a book, ever. And her answer was this. She brought up the next book. How do you even interpret an answer like this as, "Elain's book is next"? Sorry, but it's not tricky at all, it's basic comprehension to assume Azriel's book is next based on her answer to the question. Also, even though the bonus takes place during solstice, bonus chapters are placed physically at the end of the book, no?? So...

Let's face it, Lucien and Elain had no major impact on the plot of acosf (they were barely present in the book actually), but Az was included heavily in the valkyrie training (along with a certain other redhead), and then now he's in CC3 too (in which Elucien were absent yet again). He's featured in two bonus chapters, one is from his own POV. Clearly, there is a lot of focus put on him right now, intentionally. From a marketing point of view, after all of this, another couple's book being next who are simply absent from the last two books makes no sense at all.

You really started to twisting everything to fit your own narrative, just as E/riels. :/

You're really quite aggressive over my thinking Elain is getting the next book.

Regardless of what your interpretation of that particular interview is, I've also got plenty of others that strongly suggest Elain was getting the book after Nesta.

"I've always wanted to write books about her sisters".

"I know who the first two spin-offs are about but I'm leaving the third open".

At one point the third was even possibly going to be a book set in the past and in a special edition of ACOFAS, she wrote about the research she had done for Elain's book. Not Az's.

"My initial plan for the spin-offs didn't change but the world expanded".

And you're silly to think that "from a marketing perspective Elain's absence in the crossover means she can't get the next book."

Was Chaol not absent in the book before TOD?

You're clearly only on the side of your narrative when you say Elain was absent in SF.

Did she and Nesta not have two big arguments?

Did Elain not volunteer to search for the Trove?

Did Feyre and Rhys not have a conversation about her getting her hands dirty in Feyre's bonus? How maybe she's only acted a certain way for fear of disappointing them?

Did Feyre not mention how she's got Az beat for secret keeping?

Did Amren not tell them not to underestimate her?

Did Nesta not take her wooden carving back to the HOW with her, staring at it after placing it near a figure of a Goddess, then end the series by placing it on her father's grave?

Nesta's arc could not have happened if Elain was by her side because Nesta needed to learn who she was outside of being Elain's protector but that doesn't mean Elain did not regularly come into her thoughts, with SJM using those moments to build her story (like Spring being made for her). That does not mean SJM didn't find ways of telling us exactly where her character is going and the fact that she's now ready for more or that she doesn't belong in the NC.

You are free to feel Az is next, I even admit I could be wrong about Elucien though I still feel strongly that they're a contender for the next book. But you claiming he's next as fact makes you no different than e/riels who claim their ship as fact.

And bonus chapters are placed at the end of the book because they don't want to interrupt the flow of the main characters pov..??

What is your point? It doesn't change where it falls on the timeline and the events that came after.

I'd be curious to know what major impact on the plot you feel Az had in SF outside of training the Valkyries because Cassian said Nesta wouldn't be ready for battle training for years. An ACOTAR book. Not a book from a different series that not every ACOTAR reader will read. Lucien was set up for more than Az what with him being stationed in Spring, commanding Cassian with a single word, the fact that his father now wants to ally with Koschei, that he was "setting his sights" across the continent.

Az...... sulked about not getting a bond? Played sidekick to Cassian? Yes he's training the Valkyries and will continue to do so but the main issues in the ACOTAR world at the end of SF were Koschei - Vassa's captor (Vassa, Lucien's roommate and the one Elain had visions of) , Beron - Lucien's "father", Spring - a Lucien plot and the treaty (I don't see Az treating for peace, do you?) and Elucien is more strongly connected to those things than Az. And yes, SJM admitted that Bryce and Hunt were mates because she wasn't keeping it a secret? And she openly spoke of Elucien as mates back before she signed on for the spin-offs and therefore was allowed to talk about the future of the characters? Those are not the same things as the announcment of the next book as the next book is supposed to be a surprise, otherwise it would have already been announced. She wouldn't have said, "and that's all I'm saying about that."

[steddieas-shegoes]

Drabble prompt you say? I got three?

1. Eddie being so protective and doting for a pregnant Steve (fem Steve, mpreg, or omega Steve it's your pick)

2. Eddie sneaking cute notes into Steve's locker

3. Steddie with ftm Steve and cis Eddie being big brothers/father figures to mtf Max

❤️🖤❤️🖤🦇🐼

Okay I know me and I know there is no actual way I could do the last one in 500 words or less so I may have to put a pin in that for another day. I'm putting the other two under the cut because this post will be longer with 2 ❤️

1. Eddie being so protective and doting for a pregnant Steve (fem Steve, mpreg, or omega Steve it's your pick)

"My ankles are swollen. This is the ugliest I've ever been. I'm hungry but the second I look at food, I want to puke, which was supposed to be done in the first trimester. And my hair is so frizzy even though I haven't done anything different!"

Steve was whining. He knew he was whining and he knew it was annoying, but he couldn't stop.

This was the worst pregnancy ever.

Their first two babies were great, almost picture perfect, even.

This one was going to be their last at the rate Steve was suffering.

"I know, sweetheart. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Yeah, you can cut your dick off. I no longer need it."

It would be funny if Steve wasn't completely serious.

"Anything that won't kill me, maybe?" Eddie hesitated to ask.

Steve's moods had been all over the place. It's how he first figured out he was pregnant way before the morning sickness even kicked in.

"Foot rub." Then Steve sat up. "No, actually, don't touch my feet. I want strawberries and peanut butter and celery."

Eddie stood up to head to the kitchen, hoping like hell that they actually had all of those items in the kitchen.

"Wait. Scratch the celery. I can already taste how terrible it is. Maybe some carrot juice?"

Eddie nodded.

This was how it had been for almost a month. The doctor said it's actually normal, that he'd just been the lucky the first two times, but Eddie knew Steve didn't like being like this.

He searched the kitchen quickly, startling when Steve called his name from the couch.

"Yes, my love?"

"No on the peanut butter. It sounds greasy."

"Greasy?" Eddie whispered to himself. "Okay! Coming!" He said louder.

He scrambled to get everything together quickly, but paused when he saw the picture they'd hung on the fridge of the two of them, Jamie, and Melody at the doctor's visit that told them they were having a boy.

All this was annoying, but he knew Steve felt worse, and he knew it would be worth it very soon.

---------------------------------------------

2. Eddie sneaking cute notes into Steve's locker

Steve was never going to know it was him, he was so careful.

He'd been getting away with it for two years, always rushing to put the notes in his locker during classes that he knew Steve couldn't leave.

Wish you could hear the song I wrote for you. It's loud, you'd probably hate it. But I think you'd like that someone sees you. - E

It was his riskiest one yet, never having put an initial or something that could give him away like the fact that he'd written a song about him.

Steve would probably start narrowing it down pretty quickly, though he'd probably not assume it's a guy, at least.

Hopefully.

Third period was the best time to slip notes into his locker; He had Ms. Sanderson, who was known for never letting kids leave class, even for the bathroom.

Eddie ran to his locker, shoved the note inside, and turned to see Steve standing at the end of the row.

"You know, last year, Tommy was convinced it was Nancy fucking with me," he said, arms crossed across his chest as he leaned against the lockers. "And this year, I just kind of figured it was someone who was just shy. Maybe had a crush on who I was and didn't know how to stop once I wasn't that person anymore."

Eddie remained silent.

Steve started walking closer.

"But then, a good friend suggested that I may just have an unconventional secret admirer. Someone who would be scared to come forward for other reasons."

Steve stopped right in front of Eddie.

"And now I think I get it. But you know what?"

"What?" Eddie breathed out.

"There was no reason to be worried. I'm kind of into unconventional."

Steve's lips were on Eddie's before he could process the word.

He pulled away after a couple seconds, frantically looking around the halls to make sure no one saw.

"It's okay, I checked first. You alright?" Steve's concern was a lot.

"Bathroom. I wanna kiss you for real. Not out here."

Steve blushed and tugged on his hand to get him to follow him, both of them giggling as they made their way down the hall to the bathroom.

They spent the rest of the period there, and some of the next one.

And long after they both graduated, long after they survived things they shouldn't have, their initials were still carved on the back of the stall door in a heart.

[anincompletelist]

twenty questions for fic writers

thanks to @cricketnationrise @happiness-of-the-pursuit @kiwiana-writes

@ninzied @captainjunglegym for the tags friends! it's been a while since I've last done one of these so I figured I would participate again! xx

+

how many works do you have on ao3?

56! (technically 60 though… 😏🤫)

what's your total ao3 word count?

1,248,687

what fandoms do you write for?

RWRB (currently) [ 1D and teen wolf (past) ]

top five fics by kudos:

but if you could see us from a distance you'd know I've always been so close to you - the og sex curse one shot

Something Borrowed, Something Blue - enemies to lovers at june's wedding

I'll bet it all on me and you, I'll bet it all you're bulletproof - coworkers trivia fluff

praying our bridges don't make waves - soulmates with a twist

kiss me like you've got nowhere to be - roommates to lovers fluff

do you respond to comments?

nowhere near as much as I'd like to! my capacity for social interaction lately has been... lacking, to the say the least ksjhdkshd BUT I SEE AND READ THEM ALL AND I HOLD THEM SO CLOSE <3333

what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

ooh I can't usually do angsty endings so I'm carving my own loophole here -- the first two fics in the sex curse series are definitely my most angsty endings before they work their shit out in the third skjdhsjkhd

what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

most of mine do, but I'd say that overall the most fluffy ones are in the firstprince first kisses series!

do you get hate on fics?

I most definitely did in my old fandom but people have been generally very kind and supportive to me here so far! :')

do you write smut?

yes!

craziest crossover:

my george x firstprince hurt/comfort is very special to me <3

(but I also have a Jeff from bottoms x Shane from minx au in the docs so ksjhdhfjh that too)

have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not!

have you ever had a fic translated?

not in this fandom! but I have had some lovely folks record some podfics of my works! (here and here!)

have you ever co-written a fic before?

not for rwrb! (yet???? ksjhdkjhfkjh)

all time favorite ship?

I gotta go with fp! they got me like that niall horan ear crawling gif fr I'll never be the same

what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oh gosh I'm not sure. I HOPE I finish them all but I also have an obscene amount so ksjhdksjdhf not crossing anything off yet!

what are your writing strengths?

I think dialogue? it's always the part of my fics that I write first, and then I build the rest of the story around it. I hope it's a solid foundation!

what are your writing weaknesses?

there's a fine line between explaining and over-explaining and I think sometimes I fall into the second category skjdhkjhf. I love some introspection as much as the next guy but I'm working on only including details that feel most pertinent to the story.

thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I love it! I think it can be so special and can be another way to connect readers with the characters and the story. I took Spanish all four years of high school so I'm a little rusty now, and studied French for a while a few years ago and just picked it back up recently! my translations aren't always perfect but luckily I've had some very kind people to check or point these things out for me :)

first fandom you wrote in?

..... hollywood heights sjkhdjkhgdfh

favorite fic you've written?

oh no. I am so bad at perceiving myself ksjhdjkdjfhg. I think each of my fics definitely served a purpose for me while writing them, but lately I've found myself returning to these three (I'm breaking the rules yes sorry):

Something Borrowed, Something Blue

there were pages turned with the bridges burned (everything you lose is a step you take) - diabetic!Alex

treading water in the deep, just waiting for the tides to meet -(soulmates)

but also there's a wip I'm working now which..... might take first place when I post skjdhkjsdh WE'LL SEE!

+

PLEASE PLEASE CONSIDER THIS OPEN TAG IF YOU'D LIKE TO DO IT! with all of the tumblr nonsense and how behind I've been on here lately I'm all over the place with tags at the moment.

other tags (no pressure!): @firenati0n @nocoastposts @wordsofhoneydew @thedramasummer

@heysweetheart-writes @stellarm @suseagull04 @bigassbowlingballhead

@eusuntgratie @magicandarchery @read-and-write- @iboatedhere

@anchoredarchangel @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @alasse9 @itsmaybitheway

@getmehighonmagic @rmd-writes @sparklepocalypse

xx

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

🥳🎉

August isn't over yet, and I just reached my third (and last) word count goal for this month. As I had hoped, the characters have been a bit more forthcoming and the scenes have been a bit easier to write.

I would love to say I'm halfway there, but honestly? The outline went up in flames 10 chapters ago. I don't know exactly where I am going now. All I know is there will be blood 🥰

The thing is, this is the first time I have not been rereading what I wrote. Except for when I needed a detail (now where did I cut her? 🤔) I have not looked back once I finished a chapter. It's one of the reasons* I don't want to do tag games with this WIP yet.

I have no doubt that the early chapters will need a bit more editing to get in line with how the characters turned out, but I might just see this through to the end and not look back until the first draft is done. I hope this will be the case by the end of the year.

In other news, I decided that at 50k, if I still like the idea I had a few weeks back, i would give it a (temporary?) title, so here it is:

All of our Lives

[thewolvesof1998]

Hiii Wolf 💕💕💕

You know what I’m going to ask! :)

Please share more dog tag headcanons or perhaps a little snippet from your dog tag fic? Please 🥹🥹

Hi Saturn!!

I don't have much more on the headcanon front but I can share a little bit more from my dog tag fic for you, this is the last thing I wrote:

After putting their suitcase in the back seat and returning the trolley Eddie checks his phone, no new texts from Buck. He said he was going Christmas shopping so it’s not surprising that he hasn’t read the message yet, Buck gets a little single-minded when gift shopping, he just hopes that he’s not buying the Switch that they had both agreed was too much money to spend on one present. He knows Buck is feeling nervous about it being the first Christmas he’s spending with them as an official member of the family, but Eddie has reminded him that he’s been a part of their holiday celebrations since their first Christmas in LA and he doesn't have to buy Chris's affection and approval. He then used some super serious distraction techniques that had Buck almost forgetting his name by the end.  Eddie gets pulled out of his thoughts by a knock on the window, he turns to see Chris’s face pressed up against the glass as he breaths out the fog hides him until he smashes his nose against the glass and smears snot all over the window. Eddie laughs, places his phone back in his jacket pocket and climbs into his truck.  “What was all that?” “You were taking forever, I want to get home and see Buck.”

Last snippets Previous snippet first snippet

The fic is split into three chapters; Chapter One is called Crash on Mistletoe Lane and it's Buck's POV, the second chapter is called A Not So Merry Mix-Up and it's Bobby's POV and then the third chapter which is what the snippet above is from Eddie POV and it doesn't have a name yet... I will be posting Chapter One soon (once I complete Chapter Three) it's all edited and ready to go and I'll post the other chapters after I'm done editing them.

Thanks for your ask! <3<3<3

Sleepover Weekend!

[blysse-and-blunder]

in lieu of a reading week

11pm, tuesday, feb 20, 2024

hello beloveds. just wrote two increasingly passionate paragraphs about what social media and my use of it over the years has done to benefit my life, and got so genuinely moved that i had to come talk to you about it.

reading really wild mix of reading material of late. surprisingly high amount of YA, because people keep recommending me things and i keep going 'sure, let's try it!' so i'll use that as an organizing principle and save discussing some of the others for a future post. in order of completion:

firekeeper's daughter, angeline boulley, read by isabella lablanc. finished in a rush, very engaged in the last three-four hours. i was never prepared for the next thing this plot threw at me, though in retrospect saw how it all made sense. i didn't know a thing about it going in, which i think actually enriched the experience a lot, but for a novel set in michigan's UP and sugar island, it resonated with a lot of things i associate with ontario after living here for five+ years. the hockey, the ojibwe /anishinaabe names and cultural connections, the murdered and missing indigenous women. but it also mixes in elements reminiscent of, like, braiding sweetgrass (and tangentially mexican gothic) and various fan fiction tropes i recognized in their shape if not their execution. highly recommend the audiobook-- they cast the audiobook's narrator very carefully, and she does a superb job juggling the mix of scientific jargon, teen narrator unreliable/dramatic narrator (loving), and Anishinaabemowin.

castle in the clouds, kerstin gier, translated by romy fursland. maybe 33% through. it's giving grand budapest hotel and somehow also the princess diaries? it's also reminding me somehow of, like, the kind of novel i wanted to write as a second or third grader, which means eva ibbotson, and a particular flavor of plucky, intelligent heroine. i was hooked by the first page+ but have yet to see a ton more of the same high action and suspense, and have let this one slip a little further onto the back burner. it's cute escapism at the moment, though that may change.

fourth wing, by rebecca yarros, read by rebecca soler (and apparently also teddy hamilton, although i haven't gotten to him yet?) about 25% through. trying desperately to give us a gritty, hardcore, new and dangerous and fun take on dragons and their human riders, while also trying to be idk divergent? the hunger games? there's a love triangle, the protagonist has naturally ombre hair, the premise of the novel is brutal training where young adults are all dying in improbable droves due to how cutthroat and brutal it is. a testament to the narrator that i am, despite myself, having a great time. there are a few too many supporting characters who want our main girl straight up dead for me to really find the threats believable, but i'm intrigued by the prospect of alternate versions of this world's history than what she has learned and a potential for discovering how their kingdom has? manipulated them? could be asking too much.

fairest, gail carson levine. finished in a long saturday morning spent reading in bed. i was such an intense and dedicated fan of the original ella enchanted novel that i couldn't read most of levine's other books (exceptions for her short stories made grudgingly) because they weren't sequels and weren't the same and wouldn't be as good. in fairness, reading this now as a much-older-than-the-intended audience, perhaps i was too harsh-- but i think little-me was right to be a little suspicious. it's a snow white retelling, and again i think largely successful in building a more detailed plot in which the elements of the retold fairy tale are embedded, but where the focus in ella was on language and obedience and free will, here we're trying to articulate things about beauty and body image, and it's harder to say that it really succeeds? i like that we gave the Wicked Queen more nuance, positive and negative qualities, moments of sympathy, a name and a precarious political position. i was not nearly as charmed by the romance (fine, fine, it's not ella and char but it couldn't be, it's fine). i still love the use of unfamiliar / fairy-tale languages and how levine puts them on the page in such fun spellings. probably aimed at the youngest audience, of the four titles here, but treats its reader as almost more intelligent than fourth wing, possibly? YA from ~twenty years ago was a different world.

listening graded like twenty quizzes today with just a mess of random panic at the disco bumping in my headphones. it's a hell of a feeling, etc. i'm halfway through this particular round of grading, and they're doing so well, so it's mainly a quick check to make sure they got the basics right and i can jam while doing so.

watching spent a very pleasant ~2 hours yesterday watching as much as we could of the film amadeus with @hematiterings, @pep-squad-lizzie, and @dimir-charmer. love a film that isn't afraid to lean into all its sensory indulgences, and to be a little heavy-handed with its symbolism (the chocolate is about repression!) and to, just generally, spend money on costumes, locations, hiring lots of extras, and so many wigs. there's a live event performance of this film with orchestra + choir being advertised all over our subway right now, so it does very much feel like we're being followed by this guy:

...but what's sticking in my head right now is the costumes.

playing 41+ hours into hollow knight. i have opened half of my stag stations! i have the dream nail, surprisingly early i think! i have saved bretta! i have somehow missed the mantis lords, i think, but have made it to the city, the resting grounds, and have now been throwing myself fruitlessly against the crystal guardian and a soul warrior in alternation. i am...not good at combat. current plan is to grind to get quick focus, and i'm close! also, @spoonierbard stepped in and gave me a much needed morale boost by winning me the final mask shard necessary to get increased lives, which has helped tremendously, and the grubs rewarded me with the grub song charm which has helped tremendously.

making many potential projects, none executed (or even really attempted). soon, hopefully. fallow section for now. does music count? music counts, right? i joined a second choir! enticed by the chance to perform mozart's requiem in full with an orchestra, and finally fulfill the broken promise of 2020. that's my hobby right now. oh i also just cleaned out a ton of storage in my phone + icloud, which felt generative in its own way. besides backing things up better than i have in a while.

working on submitted the travel money application i've been thinking and dithering about since...this time last year? no real expectation of getting it, but it did actually help me consider some next steps in the diss, so that's nice. now prepping to take my class on two fun on-campus field trips next week, one to the manuscript library and one to the medieval collection in our little hidden art museum! i need to write some notes up for the TAs and docents to use, and finish organizing my list of desired manuscripts, like, yesterday. midterm grades posted today, a little late but hopefully not too bad, still well before the drop date. the aforementioned quizzes (i have like 28 more to grade, but they're reasonably painless). plus i was going to work on my fucking dissertation this week, and prep to teach the next few lectures in advance so i'm not scrambling monday nights, plus send a bunch of emails, design a CFP poster, put in some RAship hours so i can speak intelligently in my meeting tomorrow, and....prep for the guest lecture i'm giving on the 28th! it's a reskin of the conference paper i gave this summer, freshly edited, but i need to expand the intro bits to include a useful overview, since these students aren't a conference of celticists.

weirdly at peace with how my work-life balance is balancing right now, though. it's the extra sleep and the increased sunshine, and the little cat who is being so so whiny right now. i must conclude these lines and feed Herself.