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pitlanepeach · 2 months ago

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Radio Silence | Chapter Nineteen

Lando Norris x Amelia Brown (OFC)

Series Masterlist

Summary — Order is everything. Her habits aren’t quirks, they’re survival techniques. And only three people in the world have permission to touch her: Mom, Dad, Fernando.

Then Lando Norris happens.

One moment. One line crossed. No going back.

Warnings — Autistic!OFC, teeth-rotting fluff, mentions of minor ptsd, the "do you want kids" talk, therapy, sexual content.

Notes — The queen of fluff strikes again. They're so in love it hurts. Enjoy this intermission from the angst before we get to Spa.

Want to be added to the taglist? Let me know! — Peach x

2021 (Hungary)

Max was having headaches.

Not debilitating, not anything he would admit needed painkillers. But Amelia noticed the way he squinted at the sim screen, how he blinked a little too often under the harsh lights, how he’d logged fewer hours this week than he had since he was seventeen.

She didn’t say anything at first. Didn’t want to push him.

But it gnawed at her, heavy and sour at the pit of her stomach.

Because she knew Max. Knew how he worked. If he thought for even a second that she might tell Christian or Helmut or, God forbid, the FIA, he'd lock it down even tighter, wrap himself up in barbed wire and throw away the key. Anything to stay in the car. Anything to win.

Still, it scared her. The idea that maybe the crash had done more damage than he was willing to admit. That maybe he was hiding it from her, from everyone, in order to be given the all clear to keep racing.

She leaned against the doorway to the RBR sim room one evening, arms crossed tight over her chest, watching him fight through another lap. He was good at pretending, but she saw the way his hand came up to the back of his neck when he thought no one was looking, how he massaged the side of his head, quick and angry like he could force the ache away.

Her fingers twitched at her side. She wanted to walk over. Put a hand on his shoulder. Make him stop. But she didn't.

Instead, she just said, quiet but steady, "Don’t be stupid, Max."

He flicked his eyes toward her, the ghost of a smile tugging at his mouth, but didn’t answer. Didn’t need to.

She already knew what he’d decided. And she already knew it would break her heart trying to change his mind.

—

Amelia sat at the kitchen island, watching her mom buzz around the kitchen, throwing together something that vaguely resembled a pasta salad. She scrunched her nose at the sight of it, half-finished, but already tragic, and fought the urge to say something. She hadn’t been lying to Lando over a year ago, standing in her garage, when she’d told him her mom was really only capable of cooking one thing successfully. And there was definitely no chicken in sight.

Her iPad was open in front of her, specs from the latest floor upgrade zoomed in on the screen, but she wasn’t really looking at them. Not properly. She was too focused on the strange, unsettled feeling curling in her stomach.

This was her first time at home for weeks, maybe even over a month, and she’d missed it, she had. She really had.

But something felt… different. Off, in a way she couldn’t quite pin down.

“I think I should get my own place,” she said eventually, voice quiet but certain.

Her mom spun around, salad tong still in hand, blinking fast. “You— you don’t want to live at home anymore?”

Amelia shrugged, trying to find the right words. “No, it’s not that. It’s not that I don’t like it here. It’s just…” She trailed off for a second, chewing the inside of her cheek. “I feel like a nomad. I’m living out of hotels most of the time. And when I am in England, I’m split between here, Glastonbury with Lando, and Milton Keynes at Max’s flat. I have all these different places that feel half-mine. But nowhere that’s actually mine, you know?”

Her mom set the salad tongs down carefully, a little crease forming between her eyebrows. She didn’t look angry.

Amelia pressed on, rushing a little now in case she’d somehow managed to made her mom sad. “I still love it here. I do. But it feels like… like my childhood home, you know? Not my current home.”

There was a small beat of quiet. Then her mom gave a soft, bittersweet smile. “That’s what’s supposed to happen, honey. You’re supposed to outgrow home. I’m glad you feel ready.”

Amelia relaxed a little, shoulders unclenching. Then her mom added, almost too casually, “Will you and Lando get a place together?”

Amelia blinked. “What? No— I mean—” She stopped herself, brain scrambling to catch up. “I hadn’t even thought of that. I just meant me. Like… by myself.”

Her mom laughed, warm and a little amused. “Well, think about it. You practically live with him already, in hotel rooms, but still… it counts.”

Amelia frowned, thinking it through like it was a math problem. “Oh. Yeah. That would… probably make more sense, wouldn’t it?” She mumbled. “I don’t particularly think I’d want to live alone, anyway. And I have gotten used to all of his stuff taking up my space—“

Her mom just smiled again, all knowing and fond, and went back to massacring the pasta salad.

—

Amelia smiled to herself and kept her head down, pencil scratching steadily across the paper in her lap. The rumble of the jet engine faded into white noise; background to the way her hand moved without much thought, the way it always did when her brain was chewing on something bigger than her.

Lando, sprawled out lazily in the aisle across from her, leaned over, curious. “What are you drawing, baby?”

Immediately, Amelia tilted the sketchbook away from him, tucking it protectively against her chest. Her ears burned hot. “Uh. Nothing. I mean—obviously something, but I don’t want to tell you.”

He stared at her for a long second, like he was trying to decode her, eyes narrowing slightly in that way that meant he wasn’t sure whether to push or leave it alone. Then he grinned, easy and warm. “Alright. Keep your secrets.”

He leaned back, stretching his legs out.

Amelia ducked her head again, heart thudding faster than she wanted it to.

She wasn’t lying. She just… wasn’t ready to admit it out loud yet. Not to him, not to herself.

In the sketchpad, dozens of early concepts sprawled across the page; lines and curves and arrows scribbled in shorthand. A McLaren.

Not just any McLaren, either.

One capable of winning championships.

Lightweight rear end. Aerodynamic front wing for better rotation. A reimagined floor, designed with efficiency and flexibility in mind for whatever the regulation changes might throw their way in the next couple of years.

It was stupid, probably.

She didn’t work for McLaren. Never had, in any official capacity.

She was still Red Bull’s weapon — heralded by the press as Max’s saviour. Mini Newey. A hundred nicknames but never just her own, never just Amelia Brown.

But the ideas had crawled into her head after Silverstone and refused to leave. It had started with a little idle thought (If I could build him a car good enough to fight Max…) and now here she was.

She chewed on her pencil, staring at the half-formed shape of the nose, and tried not to think too hard about what it meant that she couldn’t bring herself to focus on anything else.

—

They stopped in Belgium before ultimately traveling to Hungary. Lando had family there. Cousins, some distant and some much closer. They’d be too busy to do anything of the sort during the actual Belgium race week, so it was nice to be able to fit them in.

They visited a few over the course of the week; fleeting hellos, shared meals over chipped plates and loud, overlapping conversations. It was nice. Overwhelming, a little, but nice.

Lando introduced her to all of his relatives with a beaming smile and a dozen proud praises—"This is Amelia—yeah, my Amelia"—and she offered polite hellos, dodging kisses on cheeks and handshakes as politely as possible and then doing her best to keep up with the small talk when it was asked of her.

It was a little exhausting, mentally. The swirl of laughter, jokes she didn’t quite catch the punchline of, but Lando never pushed her too far. Never nudged her into the centre of things. He let her stay where she was comfortable, sometimes sliding his hand across her lower back when it got too much, or catching her eye from across a room with a soft, wordless smile.

Mostly, she ended up perched on the carpet with the kids, knees tucked under her, a tiny smile playing on her lips as she held up a toy car and explained, far too seriously, the engine type and manufacturer history. The toddlers listened with wide eyes, clutching their sticky-fingered toys and nodding solemnly as if they understood.

Later, in the car, as they drove back toward their hotel under the pale blue of evening, Amelia sat curled up in the passenger seat, hair pulled over one shoulder, a big blue stain on her blouse that was the product of finger-painting gone wrong.

Lando was quiet, his hand resting loosely on the steering wheel, the other tugging her knuckles gently onto his thigh. "You were really good with them," he said eventually, voice soft enough that she almost thought she'd imagined it.

She made a face. “Kids are easy. All you have to do is keep talking and occasionally shove something colourful at them.”

He laughed under his breath. A minute passed.

Then, casual, like he was asking if she wanted to stop for food, he asked, "Do you want kids?"

Amelia blinked, turning her head to stare at him in the half-light. "I— we don’t even live together," she said, blunt and a little incredulous.

Lando’s mouth twitched, like he was trying not to smile. "Well, we can change that."

She stared at him for a long second, watching the way his fingers tapped lightly against the steering wheel. Like he wasn’t nervous. Like he meant it.

"Did you talk to my mom?" she asked suddenly.

He shot her a quick, confused glance. "What? No—why? Did you already—? I mean—"

“Okay. I would like to live with you," she said, cutting him off neatly.

For a second, he just blinked at her. And then he was smiling, wide and ridiculous, so big it looked like it physically hurt to contain it.

She giggled, reaching over to nudge his arm. "Stop making that face. You're going to scare the other drivers."

"I'm happy," he argued, grin stretching impossibly wider. "Let me be happy."

She rolled her eyes, but the smile tugging at her mouth gave her away. She settled back against her seat, watching the trees whip past the window, her heart full and a little chaotic.

"Who gets the bigger closet?" she asked after a beat.

He laughed, a low, warm sound. "You do. Obviously. I’ll just shove my stuff in a corner somewhere."

She nodded. “I do need a lot of closet room. I have two-hundred pairs of shoes.” A few seconds passed in comfortable silence before she tilted her head, thinking. "Where would we live?"

He didn’t miss a beat. "Monaco."

She wrinkled her nose, instinctively. "That's... a big change."

He glanced over, softer now, like he already knew she'd need a minute with the idea. "Just think about it, baby," he said. "Makes sense for me. Makes sense for you. No taxes. Close to Max if you stay with Red Bull. Close to everything else if you don't."

She chewed on her bottom lip, the weight of it settling on her. A new country. A new chapter. A real home; with him.

He smiled again, smaller this time but just as sure. "We could make it our home."

Amelia nodded slowly, feeling her brain already spinning into overdrive. "I need to make a list. Pros and cons. Things we’ll want in the apartment. Maybe a balcony?"

Lando just grinned, reaching over to squeeze her thigh. "Anything you want, baby."

—

“Do you think I’d be a good mom?”

Max froze mid-step, nearly tripping over his own feet. His eyes went wide, panic flashing across his face. “You—fuck, are you pregnant?”

His alarm might’ve had something to do with the fact that she was halfway under his car, only her legs and a shock of messy hair visible as she fiddled with a stubborn screw.

Amelia blinked, glancing up at him from beneath the chassis. “No. I’m just wondering.”

Max let out a breath so heavy it was basically a groan, dragging a hand down his face like he needed to physically wipe the terror off. “Fuck, don't do that to me, zusje. I nearly had a heart attack.”

She wriggled out from under the car, wiping her greasy hands on a rag as she sat back on her heels. “I wasn’t trying to scare you. I’m being serious.”

Max crouched down beside her, arms draped loosely over his knees, studying her with a little more care now. “Okay... why are you thinking about that?” he asked, voice softer.

Amelia shrugged. “I was just thinking—if it ever happened, would I be good at it?”

Max’s face relaxed. “You’d be a great mother.”

She tilted her head, skeptical. “You’re just saying that because it’s what you’re supposed to say.”

He snorted. “No, I'm saying it because it’s true. You love very intensely, you’re honest even when it’s not easy, and you are protective and strong. That's exactly what children need from a parent.”

Amelia chewed on her lip. “Pregnancy is scary. Completely out of my control. Everything, anything, could go wrong.”

Max’s expression shifted, softening. “That’s not something you need to worry about yet.”

She hesitated, then said, almost too quietly, “I think Lando would be a good dad. And I want to give that to him. One day.”

Max nodded. “Then you will. When you’re ready, of course.”

Amelia pursed her lips, staring off to the side. “We... I think we’re going to move in together. Soon. Lando mentioned Monaco.”

Max immediately brightened. “Good! I’m there already. We could be neighbours.”

She blinked, absorbing that new piece of information, slotting it neatly into the mental checklist she was already building. “Oh. Are there any available apartments in your building?”

Max huffed a small laugh, like he hadn’t expected her to take his suggestion seriously. “I’m sure there are.”

She nodded firmly, already halfway down the rabbit hole of logistics. “Okay. That would be efficient.”

Max smiled at her, patient, fond. “I’m sure that you will find the perfect place, zusje. Don’t worry.”

Amelia nodded again, more to herself this time.

—

“We’re not living in Max’s building,” Lando said.

Amelia, perched cross-legged on the bed in his drivers room, immediately pouted. “Why not? It would make life so much simpler, Lan.”

He let out a short laugh, setting his phone down. “Look, I love Max, alright? But living that close to him would be... proper weird.”

Amelia tilted her head, frowning like he was speaking another language. “Why?”

Lando scrubbed a hand through his hair. “Imagine it. Every time we argue, he’s knocking on the door two minutes later—sticking up for you, making me feel like a right dickhead.”

She cracked a tiny smile but stayed stubborn. “But it would be efficient. And Max could help us fix things if something breaks.”

“Baby,” Lando said, laughing, “if something breaks, I’ll fix it. Or we’ll call someone. A professional. Not Max with a wrench and a YouTube tutorial.”

He reached over, tugging her socked foot into his lap like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“I was thinking somewhere quieter anyway,” he added, softer now. “Away from the main city. Somewhere you can go on your little daily walks without bumping into tourists every five seconds.”

She perked up immediately. “My walks are important for my brain.”

“I know.” He smiled, running his thumb over her ankle. “I even asked Charles where he grew up. There are places, baby; small, quiet. Still close enough if we need to get into town. He said the air’s cleaner too.”

Amelia tapped her fingers against her knee, thoughtful. “Cleaner air is good. Better for respiratory health.”

Lando chuckled and tugged her closer until she half-fell into his side with a tiny yelp. “Exactly. So let’s find somewhere ours, yeah?”

She tucked her head under his chin, breathing him in. “Okay. But if Max gets upset, you have to deal with it.”

Lando grinned against her hair. “I can handle a grumpy Verstappen.”

—

They were curled up in their hotel room, watching the latest episode of Grill the Grid the night before qualifying.

Amelia sat between Lando’s legs, her back pressed against his chest. He had her squished close, big hands sprawled comfortably across her stomach, pressing just enough to ground her, to help her breathe a little easier.

It’d been a rough day for Max, and the stress had bled into her too. Finally being still, finally letting herself relax, felt like a blessing.

She fiddled absently with her golf ball, thumb tracing lazy circles over the surface, half-listening, until the first trivia question came up.

Without hesitation, she rattled off the answer.

By the third question, Lando was laughing, reaching for the remote to pause the video after each one. “Alright, genius,” he teased, chin nudging the top of her head. “You get first go. Beat all of us.”

She answered every time without missing a beat.

He kept pausing, and she kept getting them all right, and after a while Lando wasn’t even pretending to be surprised anymore. He just squeezed her a little tighter and said, “Smarty pants.”

Amelia smiled, small and shy but real.

Lando pressed a kiss into her hair. “I should start taking you to pub quizzes. I’d make a fortune.”

She rolled her eyes at him, but she didn’t pull away.

—

She felt... clingy.

Sitting next to Lando in hospitality, she stared at him, hands itching, burning to reach out, to grab him and never let go.

It had started yesterday. A coil of anxiety tightening in her stomach, left over from Silverstone. Aftershocks, she supposed.

She’d googled it, of course. Trauma responses. Hyper-vigilance. Perfectly normal, the internet said.

She didn’t feel normal.

She kissed Lando goodbye before qualifying, smiling as best she could, and ignored the way her hands trembled when she pulled away. She didn’t look back, even though everything inside her screamed to.

If it were up to her, none of them would be taking part in the weekends running.

Not Lando. Not Max. Not Fernando. Not anyone.

She caught herself before the spiral could dig deeper, bracing one palm against the wall of the motorhome and forcing a deep breath.

She couldn’t live like this. Couldn’t let one crash, no matter how terrifying, poison the thing she loved. The thing they all loved.

But reason didn’t quiet the fear.

It didn't steady her hands as she watched Lando climb into his cockpit on the livestream.

It didn’t stop her from hugging Max tighter than usual, long enough that he gave her a puzzled little look before he was called away.

Even GP noticed. He kept glancing over, subtle but persistent. “You okay?” he asked, at least a dozen times throughout the session.

Every time, Amelia just nodded without looking at him, glued to the data, clinging to logic, to numbers, to anything she could control.

It helped. A little.

—

Lando out-qualified Daniel by a mile.

He was cocky and proud, chest puffed out as he peeled her dress off later that night, caught between frantic and careful.

His mouth was hot against her neck, pulling soft, desperate sounds from her lips, her back arching into him. Then his hand tangled in her hair, tugging just enough to tilt her head back, forcing her to meet his gaze.

He was smirking. Full of adrenaline. Hungry. “You think I deserve a reward for my performance?”

Amelia blinked up at him, sweet and soft and unbearably hot. “Anything you want, Lan.”

—

The next morning, she clung to him, legs tangled with his, her hands wrapped tightly around his wrists. Holding him, having him, needing him close. The warmth of his body against hers felt like the only thing that was grounding her.

He kissed her nose, then her forehead, her cheeks, and chin, finally landing on her lips. The slow, deliberate kiss deepened, but she pulled away just enough to speak.

“I think I need to talk to somebody. A therapist, probably.”

Lando froze, his fingers still brushing against her skin, a soft hesitation in his touch. “You’re... Fuck, I knew something was up. I could feel it, but I didn’t know for sure.”

She gave him a steady, matter-of-fact look, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. "Yeah, that’s because I hid it from you. Didn’t want you to worry."

His face softened, and the guilt crept in. “You should’ve told me, Amelia.”

She shrugged, her stomach twisting under the weight of his gaze. “I didn’t want you distracted…”

"Don’t be stupid." His words were sharp, but they didn’t make her flinch. His hand found the back of her neck, pulling her gently against him. “You tell me when you’re having a shit time, okay?”

She sighed, pressing her forehead to his. “Sorry.”

His fingers slid through her hair, his voice steady but soft. "No more hiding it. Right?"

She nodded, barely, but it was enough.

“We’ll find someone good for you to talk to,” he said after a beat, his hand moving to stroke her hair.

She rubbed the tip of her nose against his collarbone affectionately. “Okay.”

—

She popped her head into Fernando’s garage, offering him a soft smile. He came over, gave her a quick squeeze, and gestured proudly to his helmet. “Pretty, huh?”

She nodded, indulging him with a grin. “I like it. How are things going with Esteban?”

Fernando sighed. “Ah. He is… complicated. A good driver, but a terrible teammate. He does not see how both things can be true at once.”

She glanced over at Esteban’s side of the garage. “He’s passionate.”

Fernando nodded thoughtfully. “He is. That will be his greatest strength—and his greatest weakness.” He kissed her cheek and shooed her off. “Go, go, before Verstappen finds you here and threatens to keep you chained to his garage.”

She hugged him again, leaning in just close enough to murmur, “Adjust your ride height. Two centimetres higher.”

Before he could say anything, she gave him a sly smile and disappeared down the paddock.

—

She sat next to Checo in the strategy meeting, slouched low in her chair, sneaking cursory glances at him every time he slid his phone under the table toward her. They were playing chess; badly, if she was honest, but that was half the fun.

Checo would make a move, tilt the screen toward her, and wait, barely suppressing a smug grin. She'd frown, tap out a counter, and slide it back without a word.

No one else seemed to notice. Or if they did, they didn’t care.

Checo was a lot of fun. Easygoing. Quick to laugh. And, as it turned out, a little reckless with his queen.

Amelia pinned him in three moves flat.

Checo huffed under his breath, shaking his head at her. She just shrugged, eyes back on the screen at the front of the room like nothing had happened at all.

—

It was raining. Not hard, not anymore, but enough to slick the track and raise every hair on the back of Amelia’s neck.

She stood, stiff-backed, arms folded across her chest in the Red Bull garage, the whole world around her muffled and distant. She could hear the shrill whine of the engines as the formation lap wrapped, but it was like she was underwater. Distant. Fading.

Max was P3. Lando was P6. Fernando was lurking, dangerous as always. The Mercedes were ahead, unpredictable on a damp track.

Amelia flexed her fingers, breathing deep and slow.

The lights blinked above the front of the grid, one, two, three, four, five, and before she could even brace herself, the race started.

Chaos.

Immediate, all-consuming chaos.

Bottas missed his braking point into Turn 1 and plowed into Lando. She didn’t even see it happen, only saw Lando’s car snap sideways, broken, ruined, like a toy in the rain.

She flinched so hard she almost dropped her iPad.

And then Max—Max—

She watched it in horror, too slow to look away, as Max’s Red Bull got collected in the chain reaction, bodywork flying, his car crumpling along the side-pod.

Her knees buckled; she caught herself with a hand on the pitwall.

Someone shouted. Someone else was already running to grab spare front wings. Alarms buzzed in her headset, engineers yelling over one another.

“Max has heavy damage,” GP was saying into her ear through the comms device, voice low and tight. “We’re evaluating. Standby.”

Her hands trembled.

The cars crawled through the carnage, half the grid limping back toward the pitlane. She stared at Max’s car as it crept past, side torn open like a wounded animal, sparks flying out the bottom.

“Still going,” she heard someone say. "He's still going."

Somehow, Max was dragging the car around. Somehow, Lando had pulled off track without getting hit again.

The red flag was thrown. Race temporarily suspended.

Amelia let out a breath she hadn’t realised she was holding and pressed her forehead against the wall. Cold metal, cold air, cold panic.

She felt a hand squeeze her shoulder — once, solid and grounding. Probably an engineer who hadn’t been briefed, but they were lucky, their touch felt good, and didn’t make her want to tear off her skin.

She nodded, to herself, to anyone watching her, making sure she was good.

Didn't trust herself to speak yet.

—

Lando was out.

Too much damage. Retired on lap two.

Max was luckier. He kept going, dragging a half-broken chassis to the finish line, scraping whatever points he could.

Esteban won. His first victory.

Amelia watched from the back of Lando’s garage as the Frenchman stepped onto the top step of the podium, soaking in the moment.

Lando’s arms wrapped around her waist, holding her close.

She didn’t need him to say anything — she could feel it. The bitter edge of jealousy under his skin, the tight set of his jaw.

“It’ll come,” she muttered, more promise than reassurance, her mind flicking to her sketchbook, to the concepts she hadn't shown anyone yet — the ones that could take him all the way.

The chassis she’d created with two particular drivers in mind.

Lando squeezed her tighter.

—

Summer break came just when she needed it.

She and Lando flew back to Monaco with Max, crashing in his guest room while they started apartment hunting.

Well… Lando did most of the hard work. Talking to estate agents, putting out feelers.

Amelia kept herself busy playing with Jimmy and Sassy, who decided almost immediately that she was their new favorite human.

She didn't mind. The cats were easy company, curling up on her lap or following her around the flat as Lando scrolled through listings and Max grumbled about all the overpriced places in the area.

It felt good, normal, even, to slow down. To just exist for a little while, tucked away in the hazy warmth of a Monegasque summer, surrounded by people (and animals) who loved her.

—

They fell in love with the first place they viewed.

If Amelia believed in fate, she might have called it that.

Lando stood back and watched as she wandered through the apartment; past the galley kitchen, onto the balcony, big enough for a table, a chair, maybe even a canopy swing if she wanted.

Two bedrooms, three bathrooms. A master suite and a double. A massive living room, an even bigger office.

She could already see it: herself at a big desk, sketching new concepts as sunlight poured through the wall of windows.

She found Lando in the kitchen, deep in conversation with the property agent.

When he glanced up, she was already beaming at him.

—

They spent two weeks of summer break, the rare stretch when neither of them had to be working full-time, Lando free from training camps, Amelia unchained from the factory, tucked away in the South of France.

It felt like stepping into another life. Long mornings spent tangled up in crisp hotel sheets, slow breakfasts on sun-drenched balconies overlooking sleepy coastal towns. They rented a little convertible and drove with no real destination, winding through golden hills and lavender fields, the radio humming low between them.

Amelia wore tiny sundresses and braided her hair, and Lando kept finding excuses to kiss her bare shoulders. They swam in cold, clear water until their fingers wrinkled, then collapsed on the beach, salt still clinging to their skin.

At night, they fell into bed full of good food and exhausted.

It wasn’t some extravagant, carefully curated holiday. It was just… easy.

And somewhere between the lazy afternoons and the late-night kisses, Amelia stared at him and thought, “I could spend the rest of my life with you.”

—

The evening was warm, a soft breeze rustling the leaves around them. Lando had set up a speaker on the patio, the faint sound of acoustic guitar playing in the background, but they weren’t paying much attention to the music. Amelia was sitting on the edge of a chair, arms loosely draped over her knees, looking out at the stars above. Lando was sitting on the stone steps, watching her.

“So, how was it?” He asked.

Amelia smiled faintly, but her eyes were tired. “It was… fine,” she started, kicking the edge of the chair with her foot, watching the dust float up into the air. “A bit awkward, but that’s probably normal. Online therapy, you know?” She rolled her eyes, but there was a lightness to her tone, as if she was still trying to find the right words. “It felt like… trying to untangle a knot in my brain, but someone else was holding the other end.”

Lando nodded thoughtfully, shifting on the stairs so he was facing her more. “I get that. Did she—” He paused, checking her expression, making sure she was okay. “Did she help at all?”

Amelia shrugged, a soft exhale escaping her. “Not yet. I mean, we talked about a lot of stuff. Things I didn’t realise were connected, you know? I think it’ll take a few sessions for it to click. It’s hard to explain. But I felt… heard, I guess. Which is something.”

Lando nodded again, his gaze softening. “Proud of you, baby.” He looked over at the empty space beside him. “Come here.”

She raised an eyebrow but stood up, moving to join him. As she sat beside him on the steps, she rested her head on his shoulder. “You’re really good at this whole comfort thing.”

Lando chuckled, sliding an arm around her waist. “I try my best.” After a beat, he stood up, holding out a hand to her. “Wanna dance?”

Amelia looked at him, surprised, but the quiet night seemed to make everything feel a little more possible. She took his hand with a grin. “We’re really doing this?”

Lando smiled, tugging her to her feet. “Why not? It’s a slow song.”

The music played on, soft and gentle, and for a moment, neither of them said anything. Just moved together, swaying under the dim glow of the patio lights, with the sound of the wind and distant waves in the background. Amelia closed her eyes, letting the rhythm of the moment settle into her chest, her heart still thudding, but in a different way now.

“You know, you’ve been pretty great,” she murmured after a while, her hand resting against his chest. “With everything.”

Lando’s smile was barely visible in the dark, but she felt it in the way he pulled her just a little closer. “Always.”

She closed her eyes.

Always sounded pretty good.

NEXT CHAPTER

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645 notes · View notes

rdmasevi · 1 month ago

Text

Like Fire and Venom

Title: “Like Fire and Venom”: a Twilight fanfiction

Pairings: Jacob Black x Reader Male ( Red Eyed Vampire )

Genre: Supernatural Romance | Drama |

Slow Burn | Angst with Comfort |

Forbidden Love |

Warnings: Canon-typical violence, Emotional angst, Discussions of blood-drinking, Light possessiveness and jealousy, Swearing, Mentions of past isolation/loneliness.

Summary: Jacob Black struggles with Bella’s engagement to Edward — until his world is turned upside down when he unexpectedly imprints on the last creature he ever thought possible: a red-eyed, rogue male vampire.

You never expected to step foot in Forks.

You’d heard about it, of course. Every vampire had. A strange pocket of the Pacific Northwest crawling with wolves, the Cullen coven settled like royalty in their glass castle in the woods. A treaty held together by mutual tolerance and necessity. You didn’t care for politics, or power.

You were just passing through.

A red-eyed nomad. A rogue.

You never stayed in one place long. You fed clean when you could — criminals, drifters, the kind of people no one looked for. Still, you were a predator. Always watching. Always watched.

You didn’t mean to get caught in their territory.

But fate doesn’t wait for permission.

You didn’t even notice him at first — the towering boy with warm brown skin and too-bright eyes, panting as if he'd just finished phasing. The second you stepped out of the trees, though, he stopped.

And stared.

It wasn’t fear in his eyes.

It was something else.

You tilted your head, fangs retracted but guarded. “You gonna growl at me or just stand there?”

“I…” he blinked, jaw going slack. “No. I… I don’t know what’s happening.”

The silence between you charged with something ancient. Something irreversible.

Jacob Black — the boy who hated vampires with a fire so hot it burned off his skin — had just imprinted on one.

You.

The red-eyed rogue.

He didn’t fight it.

Not for long, anyway.

The days that followed blurred into long walks in the woods, tense conversations, the occasional snapped tree trunk when he lost his temper. You told him your story — not all of it, but enough. He saw something in you no one else ever had. Maybe it was the way you didn’t try to explain your thirst away, or the fact that you didn’t want redemption. You just wanted… peace.

“I thought I’d hate you,” he admitted one night, sitting across from you on a fallen log. “But when I look at you… it’s like everything makes sense.”

You didn’t smile.

You wanted to.

But you’d lived long enough to know nothing this good lasted.

You were right.

When Bella found out, it all came crashing down.

She stormed into the woods, eyes wild, voice shaking. “Jacob, you imprinted on a vampire?! A blood-drinking, red-eyed—”

“Don’t,” Jacob growled. His body trembled, the shift hovering just beneath his skin. “Don’t say it like that.”

“He could kill someone. You! You used to hate them! You hated the Cullens and they don’t even feed on humans!”

You stood behind him, silent but composed, crimson eyes unreadable.

“I did hate them,” Jacob snapped, “because I didn’t understand. I hated you, too, Bella. For how you played with my feelings. For stringing me along while you picked a leech.”

Bella paled.

“This is different,” he continued. “He’s mine. I don’t care what he is.”

Bella left in tears.

The pack didn’t react how you expected.

At first, there was tension — growls, posturing, mistrust. Paul nearly attacked you once, until Jacob put him on his back with one punch. Sam called a meeting. The others watched. Quiet. Waiting.

And then something strange happened.

They accepted you.

Not fully — not yet. But they saw the imprint. They felt it through Jacob’s thoughts. They watched the way he stood in front of you, ready to tear through anyone who even looked at you wrong. And slowly… they began to trust.

“He’s calm around you,” Emily said one afternoon, watching Jacob lean against your side by the fire. “That’s new.”

Even Leah, fierce and bitter, didn’t say a word. She just nodded once in your direction and walked away.

Edward didn’t trust you. But he respected the bond.

Carlisle welcomed you into their circle, even offered you blood bags if you needed them. “You’re not the first to try to walk a different path,” he said. “But you may be the first with someone fighting beside you.”

And Jacob?

Jacob made it clear to everyone — vampire, wolf, human — that he wasn’t going anywhere.

“I don’t care what anyone thinks,” he said one night, his hand brushing yours, fire and ice colliding with skin. “You’re mine. And I’m yours. That’s all that matters.”

You’d never belonged anywhere. Not in centuries.

But now, wrapped in the scent of pine and fur, surrounded by a pack that tolerated you and a boy who burned brighter than any sun, you started to believe you could.

Bella still watched from a distance. Heartbroken. Bitter. Maybe even jealous.

But Jacob never looked back.

He never needed to.

He had you.

And for the first time in his life, that was enough.

My main masterlist

#twilight #twilight x reader #twilight x you #twilight x male reader #x male reader #x reader #jacob black #jacob x reader #jacob x male reader #vampire #vampire reader

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narrativelysignificantturtleduck · 2 years ago

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#zuko - ‘u mean my urge to find the avatar?’ #poor bby toph and bby fn gang #as someone who got zero sex ed except my mom mysteriously saying ‘there are so many fluids…’ ..oof #also. side note. the monks don’t have sex?? but they’re all monks.. #right?? or were there acolytes before too #aang has babies (@adriancatrin)

my understanding is that the monks and nuns lived in the temples and (being monks and nuns) didn't have sex, while there were other air nomads who were, well, nomadic, and would've had sex. that said atla makes this confusing by having all air nomads be bald and orange-robed like real life buddhist monks and nuns so the line between air nomad monk/nun and air nomad layperson is really hard to tell. i might be wrong about this. people who've read the kyoshi and/or yangchen novels feel free to weigh in on air nomad worldbuilding

the gaang, ranked in order of who got the best sex ed to the worst

1. katara. kanna taught her how to deliver a baby and also where babies come from and just generally gave her a thorough education. and if that wasn't enough, she then got trained as a healer. katara could teach sex ed, and she probably does.

2. suki. raised by a bunch of queer women on Bisexual Woman Island. she knows a Lot

3. aang. was taught the basics by the monks as a natural part of life, but monks don't have sex and he was 12 so he probably didn't get the full education

4. sokka. technically got the same level of education as katara but wasn't really paying attention bc he was still in his sexist phase. still knows WAY more than -

5. zuko. iroh tried to teach him but it was couched in metaphor and heteronormative so zuko barely understood it and wouldn't have found it useful even if he had. he knows some stuff from overhearing the sailors on his ship but that's not exactly an education. he knows to use a condom at the very most

6. toph. you KNOW the beifongs were like "our daughter is too delicate and fragile to learn about such things!" like zuko, toph probably overheard stuff (at earth rumble) but she's younger than him so she's had less time to learn. she's lucky she has katara and suki to be her older sisters. (i guess technically that means toph gets great sex ed but you know what i mean. before joining the gaang she had NOTHING)

#sad to say that as well as i know atla i do not know the air nomads as well as i should #also i own the kyoshi novels and keep trying and failing to read them #bc i'm one of those people who read voraciously as a kid and then grew up to have a terrible attention span #nina's personal log

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lonelyroommp3 · 5 months ago

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i loooooove the patronising little PSAs to new users that pop up on here every time shit hits the fan on another social media platform. if i was an american tiktok user deciding to reactivate my old tumblr account (let's be real, who in the year 2025 is resorting to tumblr as their alt social platform if they've not been here before at least briefly) and the first thing i saw was someone going "listen up buckaroo ☝️ just remember we are a very special website 🤩 and we don't care about follower counts because we are all fwends 🫂 and you don't have to say seggs instead of sex 🤯 i am going to explain this to you as if you were born yesterday because i'm sure your brain has been rotted into goo by the Algorithm 🥰" then i would probably log right back off again and devote myself to a nomadic life in the wilderness

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tired-chimera · 10 months ago

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Albatrio headcanons because I say so (all canon btw trust me I’m grizzlyplays)

Jay:

- she braids hair when she’s nervous. Especially in the Black Sea, Gillion and Chip have been walking around with little braids in their hair and Jay has an intricately braided bun with feathers, beads and wire intertwined with her hair.

- she loves baked goods. Every island they visit a small, wrapped box of regional pastries will show up in the kitchen. Her favourite has been a warm, iced cinnamon log from Joaldo.

- She reads the newspaper.

- She speaks primordial with a similar accent to Caspian. Since the water genasi are so nomadic, it would make sense for her to have teachers breeze through on short contracts to support their tribes, so she picked it up from her various teachers.

- she had a flower garden with Ayva before she passed. The garden became Jays passion project, a way to cope with the loss of her sister. She converted it into a memorial, with a small fountain and a bed of forget-me-nots. While Jay has been out at sea, May has been using some Druidic magic to keep the garden alive.

- she used to have cat named “Sugar”. It turned out to be a Quasit belonging to the local warlock.

- Jay collects sea glass

- she has aphantasia.

Chip:

- he has frequent nightmares about his crew and co-captains dying. It is not uncommon to hear quiet footsteps around the Albatross in the wee hours of the morning, as he checks the breath of each member of his crew.

- He doesnt remember his parents. But he has given them names, in his head, just in case they didn’t give him up. He’s told Reuben about that. He called it dumb. Chip never told anyone else.

- he has a stash of non-perishables in the floorboards of the captains quarters. Just in case.

- sorry these are all so sad but hhhhh he has body dysmorphia. He’s never felt “good-looking” and no one’s ever really told him, so he has a lot of anxiety about his appearance and uses the bandana constantly. This was made worse with his undeath.

- May cooked Chip a steak when they were at her tavern c.a ep 98, to help him and Jay decompress after the stress of Gillion’s near-death. It’s the best meal he’s ever eaten.

- He loves crabs. They remind him of when Arlin used to take him crab-spotting in the southern sea beaches. When they got back to Canella, Chip took Ollie too.

- Reuben used to teach him sea shanties he’d heard in and around the taverns by the port on Skullslice. He remembers all of them.

- there were a good 3 years from when chip was 9-11 where he wasn’t hugged once.

- he’s really good at darts.

- Chip has cried in front of four people in his entire life: Arlin, Reuben, Jay and Gillion. He has only ever really lost it to Reuben though. It was on his 14th birthday when he momentarily forgot what Arlin looked like.

- he has a lip ring. That’s it.

Gillion:

- Gillion would love Spider-Man.

- he really enjoys spicy, fermented, and salty foods. They remind him of home.

- Gillion didn’t talk for 3 days after shattering his Callnch.

- the elders wanted him to learn more languages, but it was a struggle for him to pick up common, so they abandoned the idea. Gillion still tries to learn celestial though, managing some very broken phrases from Chip.

- He loves pillows, but they can’t really be a thing in the undersea, so hes been working with Jay on making a waterproof pillow for him and pretzel.

- His coral gives him headaches.

- He suffers from asthma and joint pain due to the change in his environment

- Gillion had a small collection of mini stone leviathans he had been carving his entire life. He was almost done with Pelegus before he was exiled

- he has a love of history. It was his favourite subject growing up.

- He had so many imaginary friends.

- he and Edyn made up a secret language to communicate to each other without the elders knowing. He remembers every word.

#there’s so many more but urgh #I’m tired #jrwi #jrwi show #jrwi riptide #rat chats #jrwiblr #jay jrwi #gillion jrwi #chip jrwi

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probablyasocialecologist · 2 years ago

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Ancient humans were building large wooden structures – possibly houses – almost half a million years ago. The discovery, the earliest evidence of wooden construction, suggests that some ancient communities were far less nomadic than we have assumed. “These people were behaving in ways I hadn’t expected,” says Larry Barham at the University of Liverpool, UK. “It’s a disruptive discovery.” Barham and his colleagues uncovered the evidence at Kalambo Falls, an archaeological site in Zambia. In 2019, they spent a month excavating a sandbar some 300 metres upstream of the falls. One of the first artefacts they found was a wooden tool, probably a digging stick. “The number of sites where wood is preserved is small,” says researcher Geoff Duller at Aberystwyth University, UK. As they continued to dig, they made another discovery: a 1.4-metre-long log overlying an even larger log that was too big to fully excavate during their month-long project. They saw that the overlying log had been worked with tools to fashion a deep notch midway along its length. This allowed it to interlock with the underlying log at a 75-degree angle, creating a relatively sturdy joint. The researchers speculate that the two interlocking logs were once part of a larger wooden structure. Duller then dated the artefacts using a technique called post-infrared infrared stimulated luminescence. This involves measuring the time since the mineral grains in the sand that surrounded the wood were last exposed to light prior to their burial. The mineral grains – and the artefacts they surround – were buried about 476,000 years ago, which implies that the wooden structure was built before our species evolved. The engineers therefore belonged to an earlier human species, possibly Homo heidelbergensis.

#prehistory #wood #Stone Age #archaeology

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matrixbearer2024 · 9 months ago

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Since the poll is practically over and the outfit's largely been decided, I'll be dropping the first post to the strip challenge in a couple hours on my Ford Blog @gftimelord to christen it HAHAHHA- (psst go bother him it'll be funny HAHHAHAH) Thanks for the interaction everybody, I only hope to deliver. Here's the first drabble to start it off with since I am pairing every drawing with a story sequence as promised. You could probably think of this as my interpretation for some kind of continuation to Ford's route in "Swooning Over Stans" by @gfdatingsim since I've genuinely been non-stop playing that game since it's recommendation to me. I will balance med proper and my delulu if it's the last thing I do HAHAHAHA-

Reply to this post as well if you want to be pinged for whenever this challenge updates!

I Accept Your Challenge!

(Stanford Pines x Reader)

After you heard a new challenge becoming trendy among couples you decide to try it on a certain Stanford Pines; just... you didn't exactly explain to him what the challenge was.

Maybe his competitiveness was a good thing in this case. You at least got a bloody good show out of his cluelessness.

Another slow summer day and you were in the living room of the mystery shack alongside the Pines as they went about doing whatever. Navigating your relationship with a certain scientist definitely somewhat of a learning curve but you digressed. Similar to Dipper and Mabel, you'd receive post cards from the twins about their seafaring adventures; your mail just came with additional special letters from your beloved. All of which you'd neatly stowed away in a bag that you always had with you, no use keeping it at home when you were rarely there.

Often traveling for a nomadic lifestyle was serene and fun at times, but you found yourself missing this place. It felt more like a home to you than your own place did in the couple weeks you'd stuck around after your car got smashed into the side of the log cabin.

Who knew that the same man who totaled your car one day would be the same adorable nerd you now called your lover?

It felt a bit like those romance dramas Stan liked to watch but you quickly dismissed that thought. Fairytales weren't real, fate isn't exactly something you believed in either. Stories of princesses finding their prince charmings were mostly smoke and mirrors, things you'd tell a child to give them hope of a better world than reality.

In gravity falls however... you quickly learned that nothing was truly impossible. Never say never in this small town of Oregon.

You sat on the floor next to Dipper and Mabel as they boredly flipped through TV channels; books, papers and crayons littered about around the three of you. The glass danced with colors from the rapidly flipping images while the twins struggled to find anything even remotely entertaining to watch, you couldn't help but allow your mind to wander from the boredom.

You and Ford spent quite a bit of time since you'd arrived at the beginning of the week, frankly you'd made the trip as soon possible when Stan shot you a message that they'd finally docked to spend the summer with the kiddos. You hoped it wasn't all that obvious how much you missed Stanford, but you didn't really need to worry when he was the one who immediately swamped you up in a hug the second you were out of your car. It's only been two years thus far since you've known the man but Stanley and Mabel insisted that you stay with him in his room, you didn't know why they were so adamant until you saw the state of the man's living quarters.

A whole day was spent with the both of you furnishing and cleaning the said room because of that but neither of you complained, most of the time was spent goofing off anyway.

Now... you were wondering where Ford was, not to mention what he was doing. Was he down in the lab tinkering again? You didn't want to disturb him, but you really wanted to find him. Any time spent apart didn't feel like time used to it's full capacity, even if you did enjoy the company of the other Pines; it just wasn't the same.

At some point, you were bored enough to not necessarily care whether you'd be disturbing Ford's work or not when you went down to the lab. It was just last summer when he taught you how to get down there, as well as spilling more about his past. All of which you simply listened to unless he asked anything; it was better to listen and attempt to understand than say or do something that would make it worse.

Seems like he really wanted to get it off his chest too, be transparent with you; something you appreciated.

You were shaken out of your headspace when you heard the rustling of boxes from the lab, as well as some hushed but frustrated cursing. You didn't really recall a time Ford swore unless he was legitimately ticked off, the man made a valiant effort not to compared to his twin.

But they both had sailor mouths anyhow even if it was fitting.

"Ford? Are you down here?"

"Ah-! [Y/N]! What- what are you doing down here?"

You moved closer to him in an attempt to see what he was doing, even if the man looked a bit rattled to be found like this by you.

"What are you doing?"

"I asked first my dear."

Ford chuckled, shifting to hide something behind his back. You pouted at him and crossed your arms. He couldn't help but smile at how cute you looked doing that.

"Was looking for you, Dipper and Mabel are bored watching TV upstair anyway... sooooo- what are you doing?"

You smiled when Ford returned your inquisitiveness with a small laugh, showing you what he held in his hand. A pair of goggles?

"What's that for?"

"I was attempting to sort through which of my belongings I could still use among the ones I wish to discard. Inadvertently I ended up finding these, I think I could still make use of them."

You tilted your head at him as a silent prompt to continue, it took every bit of control from Ford not to laugh again. You looked like a curious puppy, though he figured he shouldn't say that outright.

"It's simply among the items I collected and kept with me through my time in the multiverse. Protective eyewear can be useful for many things."

"Huh, if you have that— does it mean you still have the rest of the outfit?"

Now it was your turn to think Ford was being cute, he just wordlessly blinked at you in surprise. Was your request really that odd? You'd barely seen him in any other outfit combinations, of course you'd be curious.

"I—... I think I do? Why do you ask?"

"Do you think you'd still be able to rock it like you used to?"

"'Used to'? Excuse me?"

"I mean, it's been a couple years... why don't you try it on again?"

Ford laughed once again from your teasing, the way you sassily tried to goad him on was entertaining in it's own right. He was a bit on the fence about the whole outfit however, especially due to the memories associated with it.

It's not that bad compared to some things he'd found though... maybe he could indulge you.

"Hm..."

"I-I mean, if you really don't want to—"

Your panicked stammering was cut short when a warm palm cupped your cheek, meeting Stanford's eyes as he pressed a chaste kiss to the crown of your head. He could feel your skin heat in up in his hand, hiding a cheeky smile in your hair as he held you there.

"I'll show it to you... as soon as I can find the rest of the outfit."

Ford couldn't help but smile wider when your cheerful laugh rang out; it's the best sound to ever have graced his ears in the time he's been alive. A bit surprising given how many things he's been exposed to, but he couldn't name another chime so pleasant.

"I'll hold you to that Ford."

"And I accept your challenge my dear."

YEAAAAH HERE IT ISSSS- TEXT THING CUZ WE NEED INTRODUCTION-

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baudouinette · 1 month ago

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Art log: old, unfinished projects… once again

Warning: long post, lots of yapping

another oldish project that I wanted to do in a KCD (Kingdom Come Deliverance) style. I have a very clear vision of the horse’s pose and his too, but… I can’t find a reference for it. (I might make it a palomino in this one btw!) Nowadays I’m leaving references behind for the most part, but for horses I’m not at that stage yet lol. // I also wanna draw him in joust in another art even if he can’t partake, just because I love the aesthetic of it 😅

The text is from the letter to Constance of France because I love that intro, but I’m still thinking of what to add next.

•The sword is the basic one I drafted over a year ago, looking at the one from the movie, looking at period-accurate references, then adding my favorite guard which is similar to the movie one but stylized to my imagination, and basing the grip on the movie too. There’s not really much to it, because there’s only so much you can do without straying from accuracy.*** But I always have to go back for measurements/dimensions for example, just to make sure (for example, i have to shorten the fuller a little). I still need to get used to drawing them effortlessly. I sometimes want to just change the guard a little (I like to make curved guards most of the time but I’m partial to straight ones too), or add stuff to it like little inscriptions or very few gems. Obv in the pommel I always add the cross, but on the other side I may add a fleur de Lis too sometimes. Especially with a ceremonial sword such as this one, he needs to be fully represented with his emblems.

***There are other “options” but they seem too simple for a king. But I do love them for knights. My OC Juliette/Julius will have a pretty plain sword for the most part, by the nature of the Order. Tho… she might acquire a bit of a nicer one along the way ;) (this is still super raw and quickly sketched so ignore the errors and goofiness. But I really like her and I think I hadn’t shared any concept or art of her yet)

I remember the first time I watched the movie and the swords were the first thing I (and I think everyone) noticed even tho I was a kid, and then talking about it in high school years w friends in a crusades groupchat like 🤓🤓😅😅😅 (some are actually ok? Funnily though, it’s some of the extra props. You’d think giving the King an accurate one would be priority)

•I have various versions for different stories (or not tied to stories at all) but in each I always give him two (“twins”): the battle-ready one and the ceremonial one. The ceremonial is technically battle ready too, but it’s got its own place and reserved for… you got it, ceremonies, and knighting, and imparting justice—hence why this particular one in the first image (name pending) has the inscription “Iudicium in Terra”, and why it’s so golden (more pure gold and expensive materials). Sometimes, I think of a heirloom sword for him too, that carries a lot of meaning. It was normal for royals to have more than one sword.

(art WIP) •The one from HCW says “Benedic et sanctifica hanc gladium cum tua serenissima pace et voluntate.” Baldwin calls this one Pais Sereine, and Sereine alone as a nickname for the battle-ready counterpart to set them apart. However, I'm not happy w the way it looks here, too similar to those exaggerated fake Templar swords that I hate. How did I draw something similar to something I hate? Makes no sense. I really should also design the Andalusi swords of the Al Jazirah family and guardsmen (bc Andalusi swords are so pretty and interesting!), as well as my concept for Saladin, etc etc.

I might buy Nomad Sculpt to sculpt all my “assets” for fun and for practice for my game dev journey. I’ve always had Blender but I need to work straight on a screen, so I’d rather work on iPad for sculpting, then for anything that needs rigging, hopping to Blender. I could make Baldwin’s “exact” sword from the movie but with accurate proportions and mod it into a game like Skyrim for funsies. I wanted to mod the mask into it too, and into Fallout for my ghoul-loving gang <3

And here’s another old concept:

JFK as King Arthur (in a non-fantasy way and w some accuracy lolol)

For Excalibur, this is just an interpretation with creative liberty in mind. The guard is supposed to have beast heads, like dragons or lions, so it’s fun to base it on Charlemagne’s for that. The pommel of Joyeuse (Charlemagne’s, although this sword is also legendary) is an Oakeshott type B or B1, supposedly the blade a slender Oakeshott type XII. Yes, this is more contemporary to his time, so I wouldn’t give him that blade, as I would for some of the crusaders n Baldwin. You can’t see the whole blade in the drawing so I’d leave it like that and not put much more thought into it. I could give him a late Roman-type spatha, but I’m also not sure, I can’t imagine Excalibur in that way for some reason, the blades are short and I imagine Excalibur a little more formidable (but I also don’t imagine that enormous, overcharged, super inscribed sword they always give him that makes no sense 💀). Although I did shorten the guard just a little to make it a bit more “accurate” and I should shorten the grip too. I might still change it into a spatha after all, if I continue it 😂😂

•I chose Romano-brit scale armor. I still had to add the pteruges (sturdy strips in the armor, typical of Greek and Roman). His shield would have a small religious icon. I in part use JFOliveras’ (who does give him a spatha) work as reference for many of my general historical works. Because he uses his references from real art from the eras, as do I. But he can sometimes help interpret many of the specific, hard to understand parts.

•I just… abandoned this because I didn’t like it, it wasn’t the vision I had, and now my skills are better over a year later. I thought of adapting it to a similar composition as the one above.

•For those not into JFK, the Camelot musical was his and Jackie’s favorite, and they played the record basically each night “before they drifted to sleep upon their cot”. And it’s also the name of their administration. Since it was more like a royal one than a presidential one. I always wanted to draw him as Arthur (and not Lancelot. Even tho his code name was Lancer.)

Speaking of sword names, I think El Cid’s la Tizona/tizón is pretty cool.

In the series Isabel they show the inscription to be “Ave Maria gratia plena Dominus tecum”. He had another one called Colada, for “cast steel”, but colada also means laundry in Spanish so I can’t shake that off 😂 Titionem would be cool as a sword name, buuuut I refuse any word that starts with “tit” LMAO or anything that can be joked about (“Taeda” could serve as a substitute tho). I thought of a Greek word too, then decided against it because it started with “dik”. A sword name that sounds like d1ck… yeah, no. 💀

⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️

////I had this post in my drafts (just added the newer art from HCW and of Juliette from Vide Cor Meum, and have other posts like this but they always remain there because I assume people don’t wanna read so much text (yapping, basically). A lot of times I cut out text from my posts and explanations because I’d rather people read a resumed version even if it doesn’t contain all info, specific terminology, or my full lore, than ppl seeing so much text and just not reading any of it, not even the beginning. ☝🏼🤓 but I know there are others who would. Would anyone also like to hear about other medieval weapons, siege weapons, languages, garments and armor, specifically chain mail (a hyperfixaton ⛓️), strategies, formations, diplomacy, instruments, music and dances, horses and horse riding and riding with ur legs and…? 🤓🤓🤓🤓 I will go bonkers even about super specific stuff like girdles/belts (I have a hyperfixation w them too 😂👉🏼👈🏼)

My brother is also a nerd (about everything) but since he’s done sword fighting for filmed media, I always make a point to ask his opinion about my swords and he’s like 🙂‍↕️👍🏼 , so we ballin’

Can’t wait to afford a real sword and duel him. Although he might lend me his Amazigh sword if he buys another one of those, he’s not happy with the current one, and we could try with that. Tho obviously I want to use western swords with western martial arts.⚔️⚔️⚔️

EDIT: oh!!! And I have this three way mirror that I was gonna use to paint a Christian triptych. But i may make one dedicated to phases of Baldwin’s life in medieval art style. I would include religious imagery too, but yeah more focused on him.

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nyxelestia · 9 months ago

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Kinktober, Angstober, Flufftober, Whumptober, and Inktober 2024

Collecting the five biggest promptober events' prompts in one list for people who like to mix and match between challenges.

Kinktober: This year, there is no official kinktober prompt list, but multiple lists for various fandoms and individual blogs. For this post, I am using this list from Reddit, put together by u/Random_Stuff10 using past kink lists and kink generators.

Angstober: 2024 Prompt List Tumblr Post @angstober

Flufftober: 2024 Prompt List Tumblr Post @flufftober (warning: no custom theme, so you must be logged in to Tumblr to view)

Whumptober: 2024 Prompt List Tumblr Post @whumptober

Inktober: Rules and Prompt Page

Inktober not included as it is trademarked.

Prompts Organized By Day

Day 01

Day 02

Kinktober 2. Threesome | Dehumanization | Watersports Angstober 2. Countdown Flufftober 2. “Left. Other left!” Whumptober 2. TRUST ISSUES | Amusement Park | Role Reversal | “You got away with the crime while the knife's in my back.” (Charlotte Sands, Rollercoaster) Inktober 2. Discover

Day 03

Day 04

Day 05

Day 06

Day 07

Day 08

Day 09

Kinktober 9. Praise Kink | Sharing | Stuck In a Wall Angstober 9. Promise Flufftober 9. “Don’t do that!” — “But…” Whumptober 9. OBSESSION | Broken Window | Bruises | “Frame me up on the wall, just to keep me out of trouble.” (Fall Out Boy, Irresistible) Inktober 9. Sun

Day 10

Day 11

Kinktober 11. Dirty Talk | Blow Jobs | Uniform Angstober 11. Wake Up Flufftober 11. Ingredients & Spells Whumptober 11. SEEING DOUBLE | Convenience Store | Loneliness | “Leave no trace behind, like you don't even exist.” (Taylor Swift, Illicit Affairs) Inktober 11. Snacks

Day 12

Day 13

Kinktober 13. Dom/Sub | Branding | Body Modification Angstober 13. Shaking Flufftober 13. Attic, Cellar, Hidden Room Whumptober 13. TEAM AS A FAMILY | Familial Curse | Multiple Whumpees | "Death will do us part." (Set It Off, Partner's In Crime) Inktober 13. Horizon

Day 14

Kinktober 14. Breath Play | Evil Twin | Double penetration in one hole Angstober 14. Only Around You Flufftober 14. Fantasy AU / Mundane AU Whumptober 14. LEFT FOR DEAD | Hunting Gear | Blackmail | “Because I want you to know what it feels like to be haunted” (tiLLie, kooL aiD mAn) Inktober 14. Roam

Day 15

Kinktober 15. Double Penetration | Orgasm Denial | urethra penetration Angstober 15. False Hope Flufftober 15. “What are you wearing?” — “It’s laundry day!” Whumptober 15. CHILDHOOD TRAUMA | Painful Hug | Moment of Clarity | "I did good, right?" Inktober 15. Guidebook

Day 16

Day 17

Day 18

Kinktober 18. Dub-Con | Pregnancy | Cock Warming Angstober 18. Falling Stars Flufftober 18. Bewitched Whumptober 18. REVENGE | Unreliable Narrator | Loss of Identity | “I see what's mine and take it.” (Panic! at the Disco, Emperor's New Clothes) Inktober 18. Drive

Day 19

Day 20

Day 21

Day 22

Day 23

Day 24

Kinktober 24. Sensory Deprivation | Immobilized | pegging Angstober 24. Dark Sunrise Flufftober 24. Comfort Food Whumptober 24. RADIATION POISONING | Collapsed Building | Equipment Failure | “I never knew daylight could be so violent.” (Florence + The Machine, No Light, No Light) Inktober 24. Expedition

Day 25

Day 26

Kinktober 26. Surrender | Forced Prostitution | Cock Rings Angstober 26. Persuasion Flufftober 26. “I can’t find it.” Whumptober 26. NIGHTMARES | Breakfast Table | Parting Words of Regret | “I'm haunted by the lies that I have loved, the actions I have hated.” (Poe, Haunted) Inktober 26. Camera

Day 27

Day 28

Day 29

Day 30

Day 31

Alternatives

Whumptober Alternatives

Body Swap

Communication Barrier

Finding Old Messages

Forgotten

Friendly Fire

Motion Sickness

No-Holds-Barred Beatdown

Regret

Secrets Revealed

Shivering

Survivor's Guilt

Time Loop

Used As Bait

Venom

Vermin

Flufftober Alternatives

Last Year's Favorites Alt 1: “I’ve got you” Alt 2: Rainy Day Alt 3: “Wait you love me?” - “I always have” Alt 4: “I hate it” - “No, you don’t” Alt 5: Porch Swing Challenge "Make it Fluffy!" Alt 6: Gravestone Alt 7: Getting Revenge Alt 8: Written but never sent Alt 9: Suddenly Severed Communication Alt 10: Rejected, Betrayed, Exiled, Left Behind

#kinktober #angstober #flufftober #whumptober #inktober #kinktober 2024 #kinktober prompts

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craftycalico · 2 years ago

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You know I think it’s crazy that in hardcore vs dream smp vs qsmp, the only place where Phil actually built himself a home for HIM and not for storage or for someone else who needed/wanted it more was the Dream SMP when he lived with Techno.

The house on the qsmp is for the kids. The only part that was his, he tore down yesterday for Tallulah to have more space in her room. He doesn’t use the dirt house shed at all

In hardcore he is a nomad. He has a sleeping bag and goes to a random place to sleep every night until he logs off. His only base is storage, not a home.

The dream smp cabin was built so he wouldn’t keep having to stay in Techno’s house. He built machines in there but it was more of a home than the other places.

How strange is it that the only time he builds for himself is when he doesn’t want to infringe on other’s space? I find it fascinating that even in “selfish” builds, Phil’s characters still build or tear down things for other people, regardless of if they asked him to or not. It’s all practicality and sacrifice, but I have to wonder, now on the qsmp where we see this again. Does q!Phil even think he deserves a home or place for himself? Not just a place that is storage, not just a machine, not just something to avoid infringing on other people’s space (who haven’t complained). A building truly made with himself and only himself in mind.

#crafty.calico #qsmp #philza #q!philza #dsmp #c!philza #hc!philza #i hope they repurpose the dirt shack and make a proper home

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blackpearlblast · 2 years ago

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a rundown on the listed e-sim platforms from this tweet from mirna el helbawi. visit esimsforgaza to learn about this effort. (they also have a tutorial on how to purchase an esim and send it to them)

update v12 (5/21/24) holafly (israel and egypt), nomad (regional middle east), simly (palestine and middle east), mogo (israel), and airalo (discover) are currently in the highest in demand. if it has been more than 3 weeks since you initially sent your esim and your esim has not been activated, you can reforward your original email with the expiration date in the subject line. you can see gothhabiba’s guide for how to tell if your esims have been activated. if your esim has expired without use, you can contact customer service to renew or replace it.

troubleshooting hint 1: if you are trying to pay through paypal, make sure you have pop-ups enabled! otherwise the payment window won't be able to appear. (this issue most frequently seems to occur with nomad)

troubleshooting hint 2: if you are trying to purchase an esim using the provider's app, it may block you from purchasing if your phone does not fit the requirements to install and use their esims. use their website in your browser instead and this problem should go away.

nomad

for the month of may, first time referrals give 25% off for a person's first purchase and 25% off the referrer's next purchase! it's a great time to use someone's referral code from the notes if you are a first time buyer.

you can use a referral code to get $3 off your first purchase and also make it so the person whose code you used can buy more esims for gaza. many people have been leaving their referral codes in the replies of this post and supposedly a referral code may eventually reach capacity so just keep trying until you find one that works! BACKPACKNOMAD is another code to get $3 off your first purchase, it's been working for some people but not others so try out a referral code instead if you can't get it to work. NOMADCNG is a code for 5% off any middle east region nomad esims posted by connecting gaza. it can be used on any purchase, not just your first but is generally going to give less off than the first-purchase only codes, so use those first. it can be used in combination with nomad points. AWESOME NEW CODE: nomad esim discount code for 75% off any plan, NOMADCS25 do not know how long it lasts but this is an amazing deal esp. since they are really low on esims right now! (nomad promo codes do not work on plans that are already on sale, unlimited plans, and plans under $5)

weekly tuesdays only code on nomad web, PST timezone! it gives 10% off plans 10gb and above. NOMADTUE

nomad also seems to be kind of sluggish sometimes when it comes to sending out emails with the codes. you can look for them manually by going to manage -> manage plans -> the plan you purchased -> installation instruction and scroll down to install esim via QR code or manual input then select QR code to find the QR code which you can screenshot and email to them. often just the act of logging back into your nomad account after purchase seems to cause the email with the code to come through though.

mogo

mogo's website is fucking annoying to navigate and i couldn't find any promo codes, but their prices are massively on sale anyway. you have to pick if you want your esim to be for iphone, ipad, or android for some reason. according to statcounter, android makes up approx. 75% of mobile markets in palestine while iphone represents approx. 25%. so i would probably recommend prioritizing donations of android esims but if you can afford multiple, try buying an iphone one too? if i can find any official direction from the connecting gaza crew on this i will update with it.

a good referral code to use for mogo is 8R29F9. the way things are worded are confusing but as far as i can tell, if you use it we both get a 10% discount on your first purchase. (the referrer gets a 10% voucher that allows them to top up in use esims, they are someone who i know has bought a lot of esims and will be able to make good use of the top-up discount vouchers!) also upon signing up it automatically generates a password for you which you can change by downloading the app. (check your email to find your account's current password)

holafly (also looking for holafly esims for egypt now)

holafly is pricier than the others and the only promo code i could find was ESIMNOW for 7% off. someone in the tags mentioned GETESIM7 as another 7% off code they had received, so if you have already used ESIMNOW or can't seem to get it to work, try GETESIM7. another 7% off code is HOLAXSUMMER7 which is valid until june 2nd. referral codes only seem to give 5% off and they don't stack. (i don't remember the source, it was on some sketchy coupon site i don't want to link to and only can recommend because i tried it myself) you can also use my referral link for 5% off if you can afford the 2% worse deal on your end, it will give me $5 credit which i can put towards buying more esims. connecting gaza has also posted the promo code HOLACNG for 5% off but since it is less than the 7% off codes and as far as i can tell does not give credit towards others to buy esims like the referral links, i would consider it lower priority for use.

simly (note: simly must be downloaded as an app to be used, the website link is to help people confirm they are downloading the right app)

i have not personally used simly so i am going to be going off of the sixth slide of mirna el helbawi's instagram guide, with some corrections from someone who has successfully purchased an esim from simly. after downloading the app and making an account, search for palestine or middle east and purchase your preferred package. the page the app takes you to after your purchase should have the QR code to send to the esimsforgaza email, it won't show up in your email receipt. someone kindly left her referral code in the tags of this post, it gives $3 off your first purchase and will give her $3 credit to put towards purchasing more esims for gaza. the code is CIWA2. (if this referral code doesn't work, try one from the notes of this post!) according to someone in the notes, ARB is a simly promo code for 25% off esims that is still working as of march 3rd.

airalo

some people have noted issues trying to sign up for airalo using the browser version of the website, it worked for me but if you are struggling you can give the mobile app a try and that should work. you can use a referral code to get $3 off your first purchase and give the code suppler a $3 credit for buying more esims. KARINA9661 is a code sourced from this post which is also a wonderful example of how using people's referral codes can really make a difference. if for some reason that referral code isn't working, you can find more in the notes of the original esim post i made here.

@/fairuzfan also has a tag of esim referral codes for various platforms!

(note: mogo and holafly both link to israel esims as there are no general regional packages for the middle east like on nomad and the esims for gaza website specifically linked to the israel package on mogo, so i linked to the equivalent on holafly.)

#esims for gaza #esims #gaza #palestine #free palestine #connecting gaza #despite not having used simly myself i'm fairly experienced with esim services at this point so i will likely be able to answer some #questions and i also have someone familiar with simly i can ask if i am not sure of the answer myself. so please go ahead and ask questions #if you're struggling with donating an esim from any of these sources!

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leveebreak-s · 4 months ago

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Thoughts on Big Log

Big Log, to me, is an interesting entry in the Robert Plant cannon. It’s a very classic Robert rambling song. He talks a lot in his work about his nomadic impulses. In Becoming Led Zeppelin he described “Ramble On” as “the story of [his] life.” See also: “I gotta roll, can’t stand still, got a flaming heart, can’t get my fill” ; later, “Farewell my wanderer's home.” If I’m totally honest I don’t love it, musically. It feels very 80s cheesy. Journey-esque. But LYRICALLY??? Extremely compelling. The exact sort of song that, if I were trying to explain to someone who Robert is and why he and Jimmy keep falling apart and coming back together, I would point to as evidence.

Let’s do a Jimbert reading of Big Log because I think it would be fun :)

(disclaimer: this analyis is not me trying to prove the existence of Jimbert. I’ve done that elsewhere, as have others before me, but that’s not what i’m doing now. I’m just reading Big Log through a Jimbert lens because I think that doing so yields interesting results. This is one of many possible interpretations of the song. Suspend your disbelief! Consider the Jimbert with me!)

My love is in league with the freeway

Its passion will rise as the cities fly by

Awesome. Here’s how I understand this: it’s the thesis of the song, and it’s: “distance makes the heart grow fonder.” When he says “my love” I think he is literally referring to HIS experience of being in love, and not “My Love” as in “my beloved,” given that he refers to it as “it.” Its passion will rise as the cities fly by: the farther I go, the bigger and more intense my love gets. It’s in league with the freeway, the freeway and the love serve one another. It is because of my tendency to ramble on that I am able to love so deeply and widely. To me this also implies that Robert believes in the possibility to return to a lover he’s already had. If, as you venture further away, your love grows, then you do not spend the time away from your beloved getting over them; you spend it missing them, thinking of them, growing into a better version of yourself, that you might love them more richly when you see them again. Therefore, it’s implied that to Robert, love is not a linear journey which always follows the same normative script of “meet, date, break up, move on.” It is a fluid thing which defies such a simplistic and uniform characterization.

What does this mean for Jimbert? It means that, yes, what Robert needs to do right now is go his own way, both creatively and romantically, but he has not closed the door on Jimmy forever. His mind is open to the idea that distance might make their hearts grow fonder. It is better to have time away with the possibility that they might return to each other one day than to stick around and let everything fester and get worse than it already is.

And the tail lights dissolve in the coming of night

I don’t look back, I look forward.

And the questions and thousands take flight

I don’t want to talk to the reporters about Zeppelin anymore, enough of the questions about John and about you and about black magic and curses and reunions. The people who only want me to be what I was, the Golden God, when I’m not him anymore - I leave them behind. On the freeway, on the road, they fade away, and I’m free of that burden.

My love is a-miles in awaiting

The eyes that just stare and the glance at the clock

Oh. OOOOOOH.

Okay. Now we’re cooking.

If you know me you know that I love any excuse to talk about Tea for One. Musically, it’s like a top 20 Zeppelin song for me (if that sounds like faint praise, you underestimate how much I love Led Zeppelin). Lyrically it’s maybe my number one favourite ever. I can, and have, talk for a LOOOONG time about the implications, and LO AND BEHOLD, here they are.

Because staring at the clock, waiting for the hand to move is what Tea for One is all about, baby!!!!!!!! While Robert’s healing from his life-threatening injury, he’s writing Presence with Jimmy, and he’s fucking fed up, dude. This song is open to interpretation, and I know that not everyone interprets it the way I do (fishie). But listen. Listen. Ultimately what that song is about is being fed up with one’s circumstances. IN MY OPINION, it was about being fed up with the band. It was about stagnation. It’s time to ramble on! I gotta roll, can’t stand still! If we’re doing a Jimbert reading, and we are, then invoking Tea for One here means invoking Zeppelin. In a Jimbert reading, “eyes that just stare and glance at the clock” can be understood as a reference to the tension and frustration that characterized the last few years of Robert’s experience in Led Zeppelin. Which brings us to the next lines:

And the secret that burns, and the pain that grows dark

And it's you once again

SECRET, YOU SAY???

So what’s being said is that the secret of his relationship with Jimmy is a contributing factor to the pain of those years and to Robert’s moving on.

Now, of course, Robert didn’t break up Led Zeppelin. Led Zeppelin broke up as a result of John Bonham’s death, when they decided, supposedly by consensus, that they could not continue without him.

Yet, we know from what we know of the band’s history that, by this time, Robert basically had control over Led Zeppelin’s future, in the sense that Jimmy would have done just about anything to keep it going. They met with a few drummers, in the time between Bonzo’s death and their official announcement that they would not continue in his absence. Every attempt at a reunion that would occur in the next several decades would be Jimmy’s doing, and every failure to launch would be owed to Robert’s refusal to rehash what they’d already done. Jimmy wanted to go on, Robert didn’t. While officially the decision to disband was made by consensus, it’s fair to say that, if Robert had wanted to continue, they might have made a different choice - this characterization of events is backed up in pretty much any biography or history of the band that you’ll find.

SO. The secret that burns. The pain that grows dark. They loved one another in hiding. Robert grew restless, Jimmy was addicted and unable to contribute artistically to the group, and now Bonzo was dead. The whole thing’s gone sour.

And it’s you once again.

Okay…

What do we make of this?

If we connect it to the line that precedes it, it’s Robert basically blaming Jimmy for everything that happened. It’s the same energy as - say it with me gang - Tea for One. “To sing a song for you, I recall you used to say, ‘this one’s for we two,’ which in the end is you anyway.” This is your vision, your creation, your ego, your vanity, and so all this is the consequence of your actions. It’s not my dream, dad, it’s your dream! He’s OVER it!

On the other hand, if we connect this line to the broader context of the song, the lyric is more literal. “It’s you once again” means “I’ll be back one day.”

Did Robert have the foresight to know this for a fact? Obviously not, and at this time - 1983 - he’s deliberately distancing himself from Zeppelin and Jimmy. All I’m saying is that this interpretation of the line would suggest that he’s open to the idea that he and Jimmy will return to each other one day. “Maybe some day in time, as we move down the line, what we seek we shall find.”

Leading me on (leading me on)

Leading me down the road

Driving me on (driving me on)

Driving me down the road

LOVE is what MAKES him the rambler, nomad, traveler, vagabond he is. Lust for life. The will to experience all that this world has to offer, to meet new people, to keep learning, to experience new ways of being and knowing: that’s love, baby!

My love is exceedingly vivid

When I’m in love, I know it. When I’m in love, you’ll know it. It’s straightforward. I see what I want, and I go after it, simple as that. If I want you, I’ll make it known.

Red-eyed and fevered with the hum of the miles

Okay, I know this isn’t ACTUALLY what he meant, but in my mind I like to think that this was a sneaky reference to the scene in “The Song Remains the Same” when Jimmy’s eyes are all red. Hehehe. That’s my love!

Distance and longing, my thoughts do provide

Should I rest for a while at the side?

Like I said, distance makes the heart grow fonder! Should I rest for a while at the side? Am I moving too fast? Maybe I’ll stop and explore a new love, for a minute. Or maybe I’ll just take a breather and get to know myself for a minute (incidentally, this album came out the year Robert and Maureen divorced. Not that being married had ever stopped Robert from exploring new love with other people. But that’s none of my business.)

Okay but wait a minute. Because now we get to the part where Robert addresses somebody else!! And since we ALREADY AGREED that we’re doing a Jimbert reading, we’re going to assume, in the space of this long ass post, that he is addressing James Patrick Page.

Your love is cradled in knowing

MMMMMMMMM. Yes. I don’t know about y’all, but I read this as an invocation of the sorcerer and apprentice aspect of their relationship. I read this as: “the love you gave me was bolstered by all that you had to teach me: the pride you felt in being able to teach me, and the care and protection I felt under your guidance.” It could also be: “you are someone who requires a measure of certainty in order to feel secure in your relationships; this is something I, a wandering free spirit, cannot offer you.” It could also be: “the more deeply we know each other, the more deeply we love one another.” It could also be a combination of these things and more! It’s a beautiful lyric that says so much with so little!

Eyes in the mirror still expecting they'll come

Hmmm. I’m not sure about this one. Maybe, “you look at yourself and tell yourself that Zeppelin can live on, that people will still come to see it, and you’re in denial that it’s not what it used to be?” That’s the best I can do with this one, but I’m not rock solid here so I welcome your alternative interpretations.

Sensing too well when the journey is done

There is no turning back, no

There is no turning back

On the run

It’s over and I think you KNOW that, Jimmy!!!!!! We can’t go back to how it used to be!!

ANYWAY that’s my thoughts on Big Log. If you read this whole thing I love you and we’re friends now <3 AND if you're a nerd for this sort of thing, PLEASE read Fishie's Jimbert meta on Ao3 because this whole thing is basically just me copying her homework.

#if you know me in real life no you don't #jimbert #jimmy page #robert plant #led zeppelin #lyrical analysis #big log #shouting into the void

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