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honeyhotteoks · 3 years ago

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into the aurora - chapter twenty-five (ot8)

chapter twenty-five: strength in your heart and hands

chapter summary: your first class isn't at all what you expect, and you know you have to keep going

warnings: nothing too specific except for allusions to the last few chapters and reader's encounters with in su. in addition, there are some descriptions of the self-defense class that reader attends, so please be mindful there will be potentially some triggering words such as assault, opponent, etc. additionally, all of the details for the self defense class i've gathered from both my own personal experience taking a mixed martial arts class and gabriella corvina's self defense class which you can find on youtube. don't take any of my words to be real instruction, but they are drawn from real classes, and i highly recommend attending a self defense class if one is available to you, i really found the experience to be invaluable.

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, smut

word count: 4.5K

(previous chapter) (next chapter) | AO3 | masterlist

The self defense class doesn’t start the way you’d expect it to start, it starts with a dance.

Your instructor is calm, a seasoned martial artist. Her muscles are lean but powerful looking, and despite the rigidity of her core and the strong, square set of her shoulders, she’s loose and relaxed.

The gym she owns with her partner surprises you. It’s a classic martial arts gym in many ways, looking exactly the way you imagined or have seen in movies, but for the self defense class she turns the lights in the back room down low. The far wall of the room is lined from floor to ceiling with decorative shelves, white candles and tea lights scattered across them, all mixed in with earthenware pots and various house plants. You half expect someone to say namaste and offer you a warm lavender towel, and when you glance over at Ji-Ah you can see that she’s watching you to see how you’ll respond.

Your instructor starts off with a speech - why you’re all here today, what feelings she wants you to take away. She explains that for this class, there will be techniques and moves aimed at those who will never come for another class, these moves will be aimed at giving those students just enough information to do something against an attacker. Others will be smaller versions of moves you can improve on if you come to enough regular classes or progress to the intermediate level. When she invites Ji-Ah up to the front of the class, you realize quickly that she’s a lot closer to an advanced student than you would have guessed. This isn’t just a gym class for her, this is training.

“The first thing we’ll learn is our stance,” Your instructor, Hana, says, pacing from side to side in the room, her eyes warmly landing on each and every one of her students, “but part of learning our stance is learning our range, where we can travel to and where we can’t.”

You watch as Ji-Ah steps to the side, positioned and ready for her teacher.

“It’s a very simple box step,” Hana says, “watch Ji-Ah and I move together,”

You watch as they stand facing each other, and with ease they start to step in sync with each other. First side-stepping towards the wall of mirrors, and then Hana steps back and Ji-Ah steps forward perfectly in time, then to their opposite side, and back once again. They repeat the process to make a perfect square, never losing step with each other.

“This is your center,” Hana says as they step together, “this is where you find your core strength, where you build a strong foundation, and this is how you move with an opponent to maintain your range.”

They continue their side steps and you watch as the back of the class strains up on tip-toe to see.

“Now pick a dance partner and don’t be shy,” Hana smiles as she and Ji-Ah stop their movements.

You’ve never really loved group activities like this, team sports and gym partners and all the extra openness that comes with it, but Ji-Ah saves you from a little bit of awkward floundering and lines up in front of you.

“Cool right?” She says as she positions you both together.

“Different,” You nod, glancing up at the back wall of candles and greenery.

“Different is good,” Ji-Ah brushes you off, “now follow me. When I step forward with my right foot, step back with your left.”

“Got it,”

“Alright everyone,” Hana announces now that everyone is paired off, “let’s dance,”

You shift into the box step easily, and Ji-Ah nods enthusiastically as you pick it up quickly. Students around you are completing their first task with varying degrees of success. A girl to your side nervously giggles as she messes up and uses the wrong foot to step back, stumbling a little, until she repeats it a few more times and finally gets into the rhythm.

“I’m sure you’re asking yourselves why this is relevant,” Hana smiles, “but being able to move with your opponent with ease is something you’ll need to know if you start boxing, but more importantly it’s something you need to know in order to keep and create space with an attacker. You don’t want to be crowded, you want to keep your range. Understand?”

The class echoes her words back.

“Alright,” Hana slows to a stop in the center of the room, “now let’s learn where your power comes from.”

You expected to roll your eyes, to shrug off this class and everything with it. You expected a group of women shouting empowering phrases or learning moves that would be frankly impractical when facing off with a grown man. You’ve never, ever been so pleased to be proved wrong.

Hana spends the hour walking the class through not just specific moves, but why they’re important and how they can be varied in different scenarios. You learn that the thumb is their weak point, but your elbows and forearms are your strength. You learn that standing with your body turned to the side you shrink or center of mass, and with your hands up by your cheeks you can protect your face while making space. You learn that sometimes getting close to your attacker is better, rocking them off their center of gravity.

“You need to be prepared,” Hana announces as she offers her arm out to her instructional partner, a much taller man with wide shoulders and muscular legs. He reaches out for Hana’s wrist, and your mouth runs dry.

“You need to be calm,” Hana reminds you, “you have limited time to react, and that’s okay. With enough practice, this stuff is muscle memory.”

Ji-Ah glances over at you, watching your reactions carefully.

“When he grips down, it’s going to be a lot harder to disengage,” Hana allows her training partner to close his hand down tight and loosen it back up, “and if I pull away, I promise you he will be faster and stronger.” Hana pulls her arm back sharply, but her training partner locks his hand down and pulls her back.

You swallow tightly.

“Watch my feet,” Hana instructs, and you note the way her stance is haphazard now, barely a stance at all as she just tries to pull herself back to a proper standing position, “all he did was pull, and now I’m out of position. It’s hard to get it back, and I’ll show you how, but first let’s talk about not getting in this position in the first place.”

“You good?” Ji-Ah checks in, her voice extremely quiet and calm to your left side.

“Mhm,” You nod, not letting your eyes stray from the front of the class.

You watch as Hana’s training partner loosens up his hand again and cups it around her wrist, as if he were about to close down. Hana looks over at her students and gestures for you all to watch, “Before he locks down, you want to exploit the weak point.” She slips her fingers under his thumb before he can close it, pulling back on it to show you how she can make him disengage.

She shows you again, “If you can’t get in, then you can do this.” She claps her hands together despite the hand on her wrist, and you watch as she rocks her body to the side, using her stance and her core strength to her advantage, rolling her arms over and rocking him to the side as she uses her clasped hands to draw down and to the floor, knocking his hand off with ease.

“Once he’s off,” She says, “you have a few options. You have your elbows, you have your knees, but most importantly you have your feet. Once you have distance, you can run. If you keep taking classes and you feel comfortable with the idea of fighting, or immobilizing him, that’s great, but for those of you who don’t want to do that, you should know at least how to make space and how to move.”

Your mind flicks through the altercation with In Su, your actions and how unprepared you were for him to escalate things. You roll your wrist unconsciously, feeling the subtle ache there.

By the time you reach the latter half of the class where Hana starts pairing newer students off with the intermediate level ones to start practicing what they’ve learned with pads, your mind is changed completely. Ji-Ah stays your partner, strapping up with pads on her chest and arms.

“Ready?” She grins, tapping the pads and dropping into a stance.

“I still don’t know if I can really hit you,” You adjust your leggings and drop into the stance you’ve been taught, tightening your hands into fists.

“Sure,” She shrugs, “but you know, just go for it anyways. You won’t hurt me,”

“Right,” You exhale slowly, rolling your shoulders to get more comfortable, and wait for Hana’s instructions.

You start with practicing punches, shifting into using elbows as your opponent closes in on your space. Hana stresses your footwork and keeping the tension of your fists just right - not too tight, not too loose, your thumb kept safely outside the fold of your fingers.

At the first connection of your fist on the padded leather you almost want to laugh. It feels ridiculous, almost useless. In the street with In Su you’re pretty sure that you could have punched him but really what good would it have done? In the moment you couldn’t think that fast, you could barely keep up.

It clicks into place when Ji-Ah holds your bruised wrist. Hana walks between you and the other pair of students to your right, coaching you all through the movements.

“Hands tight together, hold your feet firm, core steady, and quickly rock down and towards the arm your partner is holding,” She instructs, “don’t be afraid to hurt your partner, they’ve done this before.”

“Throw me off,” Ji-Ah smiles, “come on,”

You move quickly, following the instructions one by one with ease. You’ve watched the move now a few times, you studied where Hana’s body was and how she moved. You’re used to watching instructors, and this core strength is suddenly no different than the strength you use in your daily practice. You lock your hands tight, plant steady, and snap your body.

The pain in your wrist is present, but a good reminder, and as you roll your arms over and push down, Ji-Ah’s hand disconnects and she takes a quick side step, stumbling as she works to regain her stance.

“Good!” Hana says next to you, “Nice and clean,”

Ji-Ah’s grinning when she resets her feet, “Let’s go again,”

So you do.

By the time you’re leaving class, you feel high. Endorphins coursing through you as you pack up your bags and get ready to go home. Hana leaves a sign up sheet on the front desk for any new students who want to continue, and Ji-Ah smiles when you tell her to wait so you can jot your name and number down.

On your way back to the office to pick up your things, she finally asks you, “Was that too much?”

“Shockingly, no,” You shake your head, taking a long sip from your water bottle, “I can see why you like it,”

“I didn’t want to scare you off or oversell it,” She shrugs, “but it’s easily the best thing I’ve ever tried,”

“Hana is amazing,” You nod.

“She’s a powerhouse,” Ji-Ah nods, “once you get into the intermediate classes… it’s another world.”

“It’s more than boxing,” You point out.

“Again, not trying to scare you off,” She laughs.

“That class,” You finally say, “she doesn’t offer that weekly, does she?”

“No,” She says, “admittedly that’s one of the draw-in classes. We always hope people will feel empowered after it and want to come for more,”

“It works,”

“She does have advanced self defense training,” Ji-Ah points out, “but really I think it would be good to come to the boxing and jujitsu classes first. I’ll even drop down a level to take them with you for a couple of weeks,”

“You don’t have to do that,” You find yourself saying, even though you really, really would prefer a familiar face in the room.

“I want to,” She insists, “plus they’re held at different times, you won’t have to walk there and back alone,”

“Are you my personal bodyguard now?” You nudge her.

She laughs and pushes you back, “You won’t need me,”

The KQ offices appear as you round the corner, and you know one of their managers has a car waiting in the garage for you. Ji-Ah’s apartment is a few blocks past here, and as you slow to a stop in front of the building she turns to you.

“How are you getting home?” She checks.

“I have a ride,” You assure her, “I’m good,”

“A ride,” She repeats.

You brush her off quickly with your practiced lie, “Mhm, I have to grab a few things upstairs but then I’m getting an uber. I’ll have security wait with me, you don’t have to hang out,”

She hesitates for a second and then nods, “And your place was okay last night? Nothing weird?”

“I’m definitely safe at home,” You assure her, “don’t worry,”

Between your eight boyfriends, their various managers and security, and a couple of your new found skills, she has no idea. It’s possibly the safest place you can think of in all of Seoul.

She nods and pauses a minute, and then sighs, “Thank you for coming with me,”

“I should be thanking you,” You shake your head, “we barely even knew each other a few days ago and you’ve already done so much for me,”

She smiles and shakes her head, “That’s what friends are for,”

You stand outside with her a little longer, talking about the class and what your next one might look like until the sky has grown even darker. She pushes you to grab your things and get your ride before it gets too late, and you ask her to text you when she gets safely home to her own apartment. Falling into friendship with her is easier than any friendship you’ve had before.

When you do finally come home, you find Hongjoong in the living room working his leg with a foam roller and listening to something through his headphones. When he sees you he pushes them off and gives you a tight smile, “Hey,”

“Hey,” You glance around the otherwise empty dorms, “where is everyone?”

“Long day,” He sighs, “and a tough practice with the new choreo. Yunho, Sannie, and Mingi are still at the studio with BB,”

“Really?” You glance at your watch, seeing that it’s already nine.

“Yeah,” He nods, “Yeosang’s filming, Jongho’s at the gym, and Hwa and Wooyoung are here somewhere, they came back with me,”

“Bad day?” You sit on the arm of the couch.

“Just tough,” He nods, “the hours are tight right now and the choreography just wasn’t clicking today. Everybody left in a mood,”

“Mm,” You smooth your hand along his shoulder, “anything I can do?”

He shakes his head, “Not tonight,”

“That bad?”

He shrugs and runs a hand through his hair, “You know how everyone can be, they’re just taking today hard. Yunho and San especially,”

“Got it,” You squeeze his shoulder, “well, I’ll give them a little space, check in tomorrow.”

“Anything I can do for you, though?” You sit next to him, offering him your open hand.

He smiles and interlaces your fingers, “I’m okay,”

You nod, pressing a quick kiss to the back of his hand and resting next to him a minute, just sitting with him.

“Your class,” Hongjoong says, remembering himself after his busy day, “good?”

“It was,” You nod, “I’m going to keep going,”

He sighs and smiles, “I won’t lie, that makes me feel a little better.”

“Me too,”

You can see the exhaustion in his face but he does his best to shake it off and focus on you, “Tell me all about it,”

You could, and you can tell that he’d do his best to keep up, but after how tired he looks you give him an easy out. You shake your head, feigning a tired stretch, “I’m actually so tired, can I tell you tomorrow?”

“Sure,” He smiles, “you should get some good sleep anyways,”

“Yeah,” You nod, “I think I’ll get a nice shower and then crawl into bed,”

“Perfect,” He leans in, kissing you warmly and sighing against your lips. When he pulls back he meets your eyes again, “Don’t worry too much about everyone, bad days happen,”

“I know,” You assure him.

He flops back against the back of the couch and picks the foam roller back up to keep working his tired muscles, and you take that as your cue to give him some space. You give him one last smile, “You get some sleep too, and I’ll see you in the morning,”

“Good night, darling,” He says softly, saving his endearments for these little moments alone.

“Night, Joong,” You squeeze his shoulder once more, and then slip away for the shower.

The hot water relaxes your tired muscles, your body slightly out of practice from that kind of workout, and you let yourself mull over the day. You flip through the way Hana addressed the class, the calm power she held even though she’s a fairly small woman herself. The way you knocked Ji-Ah off balance. The way it felt to free your wrist from her grasp. You need to feel that way again.

The creeping thought that In Su might still be poking around makes you nervous, little knots tight inside you, but you can’t let it win. He had controlled so much of your life in college, even when he wasn’t there, he occupied your thoughts and filled you with anxiety. You cannot let him have this kind of control again, you won’t let him.

You’re exhausted by the time your hair is dry and you’re wrapped up in pajamas, but none of the other boys have gotten home yet. Hongjoong is now fully asleep on the couch, but the idea of spending a night alone in your empty room has you oddly uncomfortable, the stretching silence of the space leaving you slightly on edge.

You make your decision in a split second, and slip down the hallway and past Yunho and San’s room, past the bathroom, until you hit the last door.

You knock on their door softly, relieved when you hear Wooyoung’s voice, “Come in!”

When you slip inside you smile, both Wooyoung and Seonghwa are relaxed on their respective beds, scrolling through their phones and you’re glad you didn’t disturb them if they were working on something or catching a little sleep.

“Hi, jagiya,” Seonghwa eases himself up into a sitting position, but he’s moving a little slow and for a minute the reason you came in is forgotten.

“Are you hurt?” You take a few steps towards him.

He shakes his head, “Just tender, I went a little too hard at practice today,”

“Can I help?”

“No, no,” He smiles, but you know he’s putting on a bit of a brave face. It doesn’t seem helpful to bring up the tough practice since they seem pretty relaxed now at least, so you push those thoughts to the back of your mind.

Wooyoung says the rest of what you’re thinking with ease, “He’s lying, he had to sit out the last half,”

Seonghwa narrows his eyes at his roommate, “Was that really necessary?”

“Yes,” Wooyoung shrugs before looking at you, “how was your class?”

“Great, actually,” You smile, but you move towards Seonghwa and take a seat on the edge of his bed, “but come here, what hurts?”

He sighs, “My back,”

“Just relax,” You press a kiss to his shoulder as you settle behind him, and slowly you start to work your hands over him, massaging his sore muscles and trying to ease some of his discomfort.

Seonghwa groans as you dig in a bit but when you pause he shakes his head, “No, that’s good,” he assures you, “so you said class was good?”

“It was,” You keep pressing into his back, “it wasn’t what I expected at all,”

Wooyoung stretches out on his bed, head propped up on his hand as he turns towards you, “What was it like?”

“Well,” You search for where to start, “I mean it’s more of a martial arts gym, and apparently Ji-Ah could basically kick any of our asses,”

Wooyoung laughs sharply, “She’s so tiny!”

“Tiny and deadly,” You laugh, “it was kind of amazing.”

“That’s good,” Seonghwa murmurs, his voice tight from where you’re focused with your thumbs on his back.

“Mhm,” You kiss his shoulder again and you watch his mouth quirk into a smile but he keeps his eyes closed to focus on the feeling of your hands. You look back up to Wooyoung, “But, I don’t know, I expected it to be more… superficial? But it was incredible, the woman teaching the class is this decorated mixed martial artist and she was so zen about everything, just very matter of fact about how to disengage from an attack,”

Wooyoung’s jaw tenses a little at the word but he nods, “That’s good,”

“Do you think you’ll go back?” Seonghwa asks as your hands slip lower and focus on the small of his back.

“Definitely,” You smile.

“You will?” Wooyoung looks a little surprised, his eyebrows raised.

“Yeah,” You nod, “I don’t know, I just felt so good when I left. The studio is amazing, Hana is just such a good teacher, and Ji-Ah said she would drop down to the basics with me for a while to keep me company,”

“Oh, look at you,” Wooyoung grins, “I love it,”

Seonghwa sighs as your hands slow to a stop and he straightens back up, testing the feeling of his back now that you’ve worked on him. He rests his hand on top of yours, “Thank you, that feels so much better,”

“You could have let me help you like an hour ago,” Wooyoung yawns.

“Maybe I just wanted y/n to give me a massage,” Seonghwa shrugs, “and she’s better with her hands,”

“Sure,” Wooyoung rolls his eyes with a smile.

“Baby,” Seonghwa squeezes your fingers, “did you need something when you came in?”

“Oh,” You ease down next to him where he’s sitting on the bed and look between them, “I just wanted to come in and say hi,”

“Hi,” Wooyoung chips in.

You laugh and shake your head, “Actually, I was coming to see if either of you wanted any company for the night? I… I don’t really want to sleep alone tonight and-”

Wooyoung doesn’t wait for you to finish, he just throws back the covers and nods, “Get in here,”

You glance at Seonghwa, but he shakes his head, “As much as I’d love to, I really need to stretch out my back tonight,”

You lean up, pressing a warm kiss to his lips before heading for Wooyoung’s waiting arms, “You sure you don’t mind?” you ask Seonghwa.

“Of course not,” He says, easing himself back down onto his back and sighing when he relaxes into the mattress, “just try not to have sex like five feet from me,”

“You caught me, that was my plan all along,” Wooyoung says sarcastically, and Seonghwa laughs.

When you make it under the covers with Wooyoung, he picks up on your tense body immediately. He doesn’t say anything, but from the way he draws you into him and soothes you with his warm hands, you know he can tell you’re still a little on edge, even if the class and the shower worked wonders. You nuzzle into him, “God, I’m tired,”

“You worked out hard,” Wooyoung says quietly, “get ready to sleep like a rock,”

“Mm,” You yawn.

“A cute rock,” Wooyoung wraps his arms around you, peppering your neck and shoulder with soft kisses, “my very cute, very strong rock,”

“Our very cute rock,” Seonghwa corrects through his own yawn, his words stretched out and pitched.

“Yeah, yeah,” Wooyoung says, cuddling you closer.

“We should sleep,” You tuck your head into Wooyoung’s chest and hitch your leg up over his hip, your eyes drifting shut already.

“You just wanted a warm body pillow,” He teases you, “I see how it is,”

“Shut up,” You slap his chest lightly, “I’d say I missed you, but you’d probably tease me about that too,”

“Mm, no,” Wooyoung murmurs quietly, “not that,”

You smile against his chest, letting the warmth of him soak into your bones after your long day.

“Hyung,” Wooyoung says softly, and you can tell he’s adjusting his volume now that you’re in his arms and half asleep on his chest already, “get the light, will you?”

“Yeah,” Seonghwa says and the light clicks off, “Goodnight, jagiya,”

“Night,” Wooyoung answers for you, and you chuckle, slapping his chest again.

“Goodnight, Seonghwa,” You answer him for real this time.

You close your eyes, hoping your muscles will start to finally relax and unwind now that you’re in his arms. Wooyoung’s breathing steadies out beneath your cheek, “Goodnight baby,” He whispers.

“Night,” You breathe against him.

His hand strokes up your back, “I got you,” He murmurs, low so only you can really hear, “I’m here,”

You don’t say anything, you don’t think you really can, but you nod against his chest and little by little, you start to relax.

“I got you,” He repeats, barely a whisper now, and with his hands holding you, you tumble headlong into sleep, knowing that he does.

On Tuesday, you go back to class with Ji-Ah. You keep going to classes, and at this point you can’t stop. After ripping the bandaid off with her, you have to keep going. Once your wrist is completely healed, it just becomes easier and easier. It doesn’t even matter that In Su hasn’t shown his face, disappearing for good like a dog with his tail between his legs, every time you go you feel stronger, lighter, and more at ease.

You adjust your schedule to accommodate classes twice a week, every Tuesday and Thursday after work just like Ji-Ah said. You miss out on a little studio time with Hongjoong, but you make it up on the back end, coming back to work after your classes wrap up to get a little bit more time with him, or heading to the dance studio to work with the group.

In Su starts to fade into the background as your routine solidifies. You’re busier than ever, but you really, really don’t care. For the first time in a while, you’re happy. You feel safe.

#into the aurora taglist

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simplynims · 3 months ago

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Nyxmoon fanart of Maxwell ft my listener design from Left Behind!

I saw this nerdy ass man was a wife guy and had to give him an equally as nerdy wife that takes no shit from anyone lol

#nyxmoon reads #audio roleplay #simplydoodles

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asmrrpaddict · 11 months ago

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In this order, this is what the beginning of my night is going to look like! So excited!!!

#asmr roleplay #reverie audio #reality dreams audio #nyxmoon reads #aural arcana #erichart va audios #pebbles asmr #ged asmr

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angelcactus · 2 years ago

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I'm a redacted, knightfalls, castleaudios, nyxmoon reads, and will o' the wisps audio content enjoyer

I need to get into GBA but I'm lazy and I have no time

hi new bff how r u?

I am good new best friend, you?

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honeyhotteoks · 3 years ago

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into the aurora - chapter twenty-three (ot8)

chapter twenty-three: making a change

chapter summary: yeosang and wooyoung put themselves in harm's way, and you need to step away.

warnings: please see under the cut for specific content warnings i want readers to be aware of. otherwise; protective ot8, stressed af reader, discussions of power imbalances between men and women, suggestive language

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, smut

word count: 5.7K

(previous chapter) (next chapter) | AO3 | masterlist

special content warnings: abusive/mean language, *slight* physical alteration where in su grabs reader's wrist and bruises it, but nothing further. please read with care.

“Are you alright?” His voice is serious now.

“At the moment,” you settle on.

“I’m coming,” Yeosang says firmly, “we’re close, stay put.”

“Don’t,” your eyes break from In Su when you realize what he’s suggesting.

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Yeosang says, his voice clipped, “just stay put.”

The call ends abruptly, and you swallow hard. Your name is called at the end of the coffee bar, and In Su smiles before picking up your cup and making his way to you across the café to meet you for the first time in over a year.

There are a lot of options in front of you, but the one you like the least is staying put and letting Yeosang and Wooyoung put themselves in the public eye for you. As In Su approaches, a pleased smile on his lips, you take a step backwards and try to think of a plan, any plan that would get you away from him and keep your boys out of view.

Before you can settle on one, he’s in front of you. “y/n,” he says finally, handing over your coffee.

“Hi, In Su.”

“I thought I’d come check on what’s taking so long,” he says simply with a shrug.

Anger rises in you, and you can’t stop your tongue, “I can’t exactly control how quickly the hiring managers pick up the phone, now can I?”

His jaw sets, “I told you to do whatever you have to do,”

“And I did. I’m not exactly an executive over there,”

“Not even a phone call?” He scoffs.

“I will ask again when you can expect to hear from them, but I passed everything over like you asked and told them they would be fools not to hire you,” you lie easily, practiced now that you’ve been living with the boys for a while.

“You’ll ask today.” He instructs, “Then you will call me and let me know exactly when I can expect to hear. If I don’t hear from you by,”

You’ve had enough and time was ticking, “You’ll what? Release the photos? In Su, I’m your only hope of getting a job at KQ and you said it yourself, it’s been a lot of rejection letters. You’ll wait.”

He’s seething, but you turn on your heel and head for the door. Your heart is pounding against your chest, a mixture of nerves and anger bubbling up in your chest. It isn’t fair to have to wait for the police, or wait for him to escalate, or to bow to his demands. It isn’t fair that a simple boyfriend at eighteen could turn into an abuser. Your hands push against the door of the café and into the street, and you take a deep breath of air. You’re planning on calling Yeosang back, telling him not to bother, you handled it yourself, but you feel a hand close around your wrist tightly and yank you back, your coffee dropping from your other hand as you try to pull away.

In Su pulls you firmly back towards the exterior wall of the café and you whip around to face him.

“Take your hands off me.”

His fingers tighten on your wrist painfully, but you try not to wince, “You know, you’ve always been a bitch.”

Angry heat flames your cheeks, “have I?”

He tightens his hold again and yanks you closer to him, your wrist on fire and the jerk lighting up pain through your shoulder. He sneers, “You were a lot better at school when you shut up and let me fuck you.”

Tears spring to your eyes, a combination of his words and the pain in your wrist striking you deeply. “I hate you,” you manage, “I think I’ve always hated you,”

You watch his eyes light with an anger you had never seen in them before, and he throws the arm he’s holding in a vice grip down sharply. It’s cliché, but for a moment, things feel like slow motion on this quiet block of early morning Seoul. His hand raises and you realize in that moment you’ve never been hit before, not even by a parent or a friend and certainly never by a man. Instinctively your arm raises to protect your face and you squeeze your eyes shut, but the blow never comes. The sound of a body colliding with the concrete wall of the café makes you stumble back and when you open your eyes it’s Yeosang who’s pressed against In Su, his forearm firmly against In Su’s throat.

“Yeo! No!” You scramble forward, reaching for his arm but Wooyoung blocks you, stepping between you and the altercation.

Yeosang and Wooyoung don’t even so much as glance back at you, they are fully focused on In Su. Yeosang tightens his hold, “If you so much as look at her again, I’ll kill you.”

You glance around the street, frantic, and it’s a miracle that no one is around. Turning, you grip Wooyoung, trying desperately to get him to turn around or intervene and stop this. He doesn’t respond, and instead you watch as he fishes through In Su’s pockets and pulls out his phone. He holds the phone up to In Su’s face and unlocks it with Face Id before navigating through his applications.

His jaw is set, muscles twitching visibly as he flicks through. You watch as he deletes them from his photos, the text messages he sent to you, and from iCloud storage. “Where do you have copies?” You’ve never heard his voice like that before.

Yeosang releases just enough for In Su to sputter and cough, and you suddenly feel incredibly validated by how small he looks compared to Yeosang and Wooyoung. He chokes out, “Fuck off,”

Yeosang pulls him back from the wall slightly and jams him back against it, “This is not a joke.”

“Wooyoung,” you tug his shirt, “please you can’t do this, please,”

“I asked you a question,” Wooyoung ignores you and repeats, “where do you have copies?”

Yeosang’s gaze on In Su is murderous, “Answer him.”

In Su’s eyes flick to you as you lean around Wooyoung and Yeosang’s free hand tightly smacks his face away from looking at you, forcing his eyes back to him. “Answer him.” He says again, so calmly it scares you.

“Email.” In Su finally says, “Google Drive.”

Wooyoung begins navigating the phone again, sifting through email and his Google Drive photos until he’s satisfied that they’re gone. He navigates to your text conversation and deletes it, and then deletes your contact information from his phone, “Anywhere else?”

“No,” he replies.

“Are you sure about that?” Wooyoung takes a step forward.

“I’m sure.”

Yeosang releases him and Wooyoung looks like he’s going to hand the phone over, but lets it fall through his fingers instead to land squarely on its front, shattering the glass screen. “Sorry,” Wooyoung shrugs.

"Leave her alone now. Don’t come here, don’t call her, don’t ask for a favor again.” Yeosang says calmly, “Do you understand?”

In Su clears his throat and nods.

“Say you understand.” Wooyoung directs, his voice hard.

“I understand,” he spits out, “I get it,”

“Good,” Yeosang says, “now fuck off.”

In Su looks up to you and Wooyoung shifts to the left to block you from view. You hear his footsteps fading, and your fist that’s been locked tightly on Wooyoung’s shirt starts to loosen. They both stay stiff for a few moments more, watching In Su’s retreating form down the block.

They still don’t look at you, still don’t really interact until a few more moments pass, and then Wooyoung turns for the black car parked nearby and climbs into the driver’s seat. Yeosang gestures for you to follow and gets in the backseat, you slide in alongside him. Once cocooned in the privacy of the car with the tinted windows their persona breaks.

Yeosang reaches and pulls you into him tightly, “I said stay put,” he says, but his voice is weaker than before, hoarse.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want anyone to see you,” you grip him, burying your face in his chest.

Wooyoung turns in the driver’s seat and reaches, his warm hand resting on your leg, “You said he never hurt you before,”

“He never did,” you sigh and lean back a bit from Yeosang, “I didn’t think he would do that,”

“I could kill him for what he said to you,” Wooyoung’s eyes soften, and you realize there was more of the conversation between you and In Su that they heard.

Your blush deepens and you look down, “I just want to forget it. The pictures are gone now, so it’s done,”

“Still,” he says, “I’m sorry,”

Yeosang shifts and takes your hands in his, but the movement in your right wrist runs a sharp line of pain up your arm and you hiss, pulling your arm back away from him on instinct. “Whoa,” Yeosang releases you and catches your eye, “What hurts?”

“My wrist,” you admit, and you feel Wooyoung’s fingers tighten on your leg.

Yeosang reaches out and gently gestures for you to present your arm. He gingerly smooths your shirt sleeve up to assess the damage and he hums lowly when he sees it.

“Fuck,” Wooyoung breaths and you sniff back tears. Your wrist is a mess of mottled colors already, red and raw with purple tones already coming through, the clear shape of his fingers pressed into your skin.

Yeosang is calm, and his cool fingers run over things, gently prodding the injury. “I don’t think it’s broken,” he says, “can you move it?”

Gently you test it each way and don’t have any more serious or sharp pains, just dull and uncomfortable. “I think it’s just bruised; it looks worse than it is,”

“Okay,” Yeosang nods, “then let’s get to the studio and we’ll get you some ice,”

Wooyoung squeezes your knee before turning around in his seat and starting up the car. As he drives the block or two, he glances back in the rear-view mirror at you repeatedly, checking to make sure you’re still there and in one piece.

Yeosang pulls you close again and kisses the side of your head softly, your bruised wrist laying softly in his open palm. “I wanted you to stay inside so you’d be with people,” he murmurs, “I was afraid of what he might do,”

“I’m sorry,” you manage.

“He won’t bother you anymore,” he says, “but please if something like this ever happens again stay somewhere with people and call me. I’ll come for you, it won’t have to be a scene,”

You sigh, “I just wanted you safe, I never want anyone to post something about you or,”

“I know,” Yeosang interrupts, “but this is different. This is your safety.”

“Okay,” you nod against him, “okay.”

Wooyoung pulls into the garage at the studio and parks the car, taking a deep breath he gets out before opening your door and reaching in for you. You let him take your undamaged wrist and help you out and say, “Is everyone here?”

“Yeah,” Wooyoung nods, “we were running behind this morning, so everyone should be upstairs.”

You tuck your head and nod back, heading straight for the elevators and pulling the sleeve of your sweater down over your wrist. “Hey,” Yeosang jogs to catch up you, “what’s wrong?”

“I’m just,” you sigh, hitting the button for the elevator and glancing up to him, “this whole thing is just embarrassing, and I just need it to be over. We have enough to focus on with work,”

“I think he’ll leave you alone,” Wooyoung’s warm hand centers on your back, “and the pictures are gone. He can try and be asshole if he wants, but only if he’s stupid. He won’t get near you again.”

“He saw you though,” the thought strikes you as you get into the elevator, “he could say something about you both.”

Yeosang snorts softly, “Only if he never wants a job in the industry,”

“Even still,” Wooyoung says when the elevator starts its climb up to the practice room, “I wouldn’t apologize for it, he put his hands on you.”

“Yeah,” the elevator slows to a stop, and very suddenly you wish you were home instead. A week of fraying nerves is starting to take its toll and remembering his persistence after the breakup has you more anxious than not.

When the doors open wide it's a familiar sight. Hongjoong is on the computer at the far end of the studio space, Mingi resting on the couch nearby and downing a bottle of water, the rest of them are working on minute choreography details and discussing an improvement to one of the moves. You know there’s managers in the building somewhere, but here in the practice room at least you are alone.

“Hey, you’re late,” Jongho calls when he sees Wooyoung and Yeosang.

“We got held up,” Wooyoung says, and gives your hip a soft squeeze before he heads over to the group.

“Hey y/n,” Mingi greets you with a wave and a smile, and you return it but feel it when the rest of them flick their eyes up to you, clearly not realizing you were stopping by so early. You had intended to just drop by and pick something up from Hongjoong before heading back over to the main offices, but you know Yeosang is going to insist on taking care of you and you would have to explain what happened to everyone.

Yeosang slides a hand across your shoulders and nudges you softly, “Let’s get that ice,” he says, his voice low.

You wave to the rest of them, and attempt a casual smile, and let Yeosang steer you towards the side room where there is a kitchenette and first aid kit. There’s no door to the kitchenette though, simply a pass-through doorway, so of course your hopes that they wouldn’t cause a scene are destroyed the minute Yeosang pulls down the first aid bag and opens the freezer for an ice pack.

“It’s okay,” you hear Wooyoung call, and you know he must have said something.

“What the hell happened?” Yunho’s close, and then suddenly the room is full of everyone crowding.

“Please,” you shake your head, “don’t be upset.”

“y/n?” San moves into your eye line, looking you over quickly to see what’s wrong.

Yeosang cuts in, “We ran into In Su, but everything’s fine,” it feels easier to keep your eyes locked on his steady gaze, but you hear the exclamations from the others. Yeosang reaches out a hand, “Can I see?”

“Yeah,” you extend your arm to him, and once again he peels back the edge of your sweater, only this time he slides it further up to lock the fabric above your elbow so he can work on your wrist without it slipping down.

“Somebody explain, right now.” Hongjoong says, stern.

Yunho’s warm hand rests just below your neck on your upper back and you glance up to see his worried eyes, “I’m okay,” you murmur up to him and he gives you a tight smile, his concern still evident.

Yeosang explains quickly while he starts to wrap an athletic bandage around your wrist to stabilize it, and you feel Yunho’s hand tighten on your back when it becomes clear just how you got the bruises.

“Tell me you hit him,” Mingi says, looking to Wooyoung.

Yeosang surprises everyone, “I put him into a wall, I think that counts.”

“You what?” Hongjoong clarifies, shock across his features.

With your undamaged hand you catch Hongjoong’s in yours and lace your fingers together, drawing his eyes to you before you say, “Don’t be angry with them, it’s my fault they were there.”

“Stop that,” Wooyoung dismisses immediately.

Yeosang secures the bandage and checks the tightness, tweaking your wrist slightly which has you pulling back your hand instinctively, a low hiss through your teeth at the sensation. “Sorry,” Yeosang says, gently taking your wrist back in his hands and finishing a little more carefully.

“I’m good,” you assure him, “it’s just tender.” You meet San’s eyes, seeing the way his jaw is set tight, the muscles in his jaw jumping when you wince at your injury.

“You’re sure it’s not broken?” Jongho asks.

“Yeah,” Yeosang nods, “she can move it okay, it just doesn’t feel great.”

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong cuts in, “are you going to explain putting him into a wall, or do I have to guess?”

You know where he’s coming from, his job is to protect you all. He’s the first to talk to the managers, the first to take the blame, the one it all comes down to, but a flare of anger flashes in your chest. “Stop it,” you interrupt, your voice much firmer, “he would have done a lot worse if they hadn’t gotten there in time, and it’s my fault for being alone with him anyways. No one saw us, I checked. The photos are gone, and if In Su really wants to make waves by accusing them of hitting him, he can try but I don’t know who would believe him.”

Eight pairs of eyes are on you, but you meet Hongjoong’s gaze directly. He’s quiet, thinking, turning your words over. “No one?” He confirms.

You shake your head, “There was nobody there, I promise.”

He thinks for a moment more, and you feel the rest of the members waiting, holding their breath until he says, “Okay,”

The room feels suddenly stifling, and when Yunho drops a kiss on the top of your head and you meet Seonghwa’s soft, worried expression, you push away from them. “I have to go to work,”

“You should rest,” Yeosang saw you in the car, he saw the way your emotions flooded up and the shaking of your hands, but you ignore him.

“I’m late already,” you push past them and get into the wider space of the practice room to take a deep breath.

“You should take the day,” San offers, coming to rest behind you and putting a gentle hand on the small of your back, trying to smooth out the anger that was so obviously bubbling under the surface.

“Stop,” You shake your head, “I’m fine. I have a few bruises, I’m fine.” You press the elevator button down and wait.

“I’ll walk you,” Yunho says, grabbing his coat off the hook on the wall and adjusting the cap on his head.

You turn towards him, “No, don’t.”

“You shouldn’t walk there alone,” he protests, “If you want to go back to the office, just let one of us,”

“I said I’m fine,” you push back, “I’ll call Chae on my way, I just need some air. I’m sure I’ll see you tonight,”

The elevator doors open wide, and you spring forwards. Confusion is written across all their faces, Yunho looking positively dejected, but you ignore it.

“You’re sure you’ll see us tonight?” Wooyoung catches your words, “Wait, wait,”

You turn, pressing the ground floor, “I just need to get to work, I’m okay. Thank you for your help, I’ll text you later.”

The doors close.

It doesn’t take long for your phone to start ringing, and when you glance down and see Seonghwa’s name lighting up your phone you know you should answer and explain that you just need a little space, that today was stressful, that you feel incredibly small after what happened and just don’t want to be coddled, but you can’t. You silence the call and tuck your phone away, ignoring the vibrations coming through with text messages from the boys. You’ll text them later, you said you would.

On the street outside the practice studio, you’re suddenly anxious again. For at least three months after your breakup, In Su would just pop up anywhere. He was always conveniently around, easily able to bump into you and beg you to take him back. Now that he had escalated things, you were scared. Yunho was right of course, you should have just let him walk you back to KQ even just to keep you from being as terrified as you are right now, but you’re so sick and tired of feeling weak.

You start to walk and pull out your phone, scrolling for Chae’s number, but another thought occurs to you, and you slide your contacts list further, narrowing in on Ji Ah’s name.

She picks up after a few rings, “Hello?”

“Ji Ah, hey,” you can tell your voice sounds a little tense, “it’s y/n.”

“Yeah, hey,” she says brightly, “what’s up?”

“Are you doing anything later?”

“Later?”

“After work, I mean,” you clarify.

“Um, not really? Is there a team dinner I’m forgetting?” She asks.

“No, no,” you glance around the busy intersection ahead of you and feel comforted by the throng of people you can disappear into, “I was just wondering if you’d want to get dinner with me? I’m kind of having a bad day and thought it would be nice,”

“Oh,” Ji Ah pauses, and you wince, hoping you haven’t overstepped with this girl who you really did want to become friends with, “yeah, I mean, I probably can’t get away until six or so, but if that’s okay?”

“Perfect,” you assure her.

“Okay, then let’s do it!” She says, cheery as always.

KQ is just ahead, and you jog up the steps to the entrance, “I’ll text you later then,”

In the elevator on your way up you glance at your group texts and your heart clenches in your chest.

if there’s something we can do, just tell us, okay? – Yunho’s message reads.

let us know you get to the office safely, please. – Yeosang.

if you don’t i’m coming over there. – Wooyoung’s message puts a smile on your lips, you can hear it in his voice.

did we do something to upset you, love? you can tell us if we did. i don’t like how we left things. – you sigh at Seonghwa’s message, pressing your eyes shut tight and then quickly bringing yourself back to reality when the elevator dings at your floor.

You make it to your desk quickly, grateful that Chae and Seo Jun aren’t in yet, and drop your head in your hands, ignoring the ache in your wrist. You read their messages again, guilt panging in you, and write your response – at the office safe, and you didn’t do anything wrong, i promise. this morning was upsetting, and i just need some space. i’m going to get dinner with ji ah later and might crash with her. don’t worry or wait up, i’m okay and i’ll be home soon.

You press send and know it’s going to hurt them, or at least scare them, but you can’t focus on that now. You hope they’ll understand, and you take a deep breath and silence your phone so you can get some work done before meeting Ji Ah later.

It only takes two shots of soju and thirty minutes for you to tear up in the restaurant in front of Ji Ah later, and it’s almost impossible to articulate how you’re feeling without admitting to the fact that you’re dating all eight members of Ateez, but you try.

“Oh my god,” Ji Ah shakes her head and reaches for your hand when you confess what happened with In Su this morning, “you said you tripped and fell!”

“I just didn’t want anyone else to hear,” you tell her, thinking back to how you met Ji Ah outside the KQ offices, Do Yun and Minjun in tow.

“What happened? How did you get away?” She presses.

A piece of you wants to tell the truth, you don’t want to lie to your new friend, but maintaining the trust of your partners and keeping them safe and you safe from public scrutiny always has to be the most important thing. You shrug, “I told him to back off, and there were people around, so he ended up just leaving.”

“You should call the police,” she says.

“Yeah,” you nod, “probably.”

“Not probably,” Ji Ah shakes her head, “what if he shows up again?”

You sigh and drop your head into your uninjured hand, “I don’t know, honestly. I can’t have him coming to work, that would be too embarrassing.”

Ji Ah is quiet, but when you glance up you can see a small smile on her face, “You don’t want the boys to see him?”

Your stomach clenches, a cold sweat springing up on your brow, “Why do you say that?”

She laughs, “Sorry, I just see the way you look at them during practice. They are handsome and they’re easy to like.”

Relief floods through you, “Oh,”

She shakes her head, “You’ve never worked with idols before, have you?”

You shake your head.

She takes a long sip of her drink and leans back in her chair, “I was starstruck too when I first started working with them, meeting any idol in general was intimidating, but they’re just people. You can think they’re hot if you want, and you can even have a crush on them, but,” she hesitates to take another quick drink, “you can’t ever flirt with them or engage like that. It would hurt your position here, and they can’t really date anyone let alone a staff member.”

“I’m not trying to date them,” you clarify, and technically it feels good not to lie since you aren’t trying to date them, you already are.

“Okay, okay,” she holds up her hands, “I’m just making sure. I feel like I saw a little spark between you and San, but he’s just flirty. You should be careful.”

You laugh immediately, and you know she doesn’t get the joke, but it’s still hilarious. You recover and nod, “No, of course. I know, they’re just cute and nice to work with. It still doesn’t change the fact that it would be embarrassing if my ex showed up in front of them, or anyone from work, and did what he did this morning.”

“I’d pay good money to watch Mingi punch someone though,” she observes with a smile and takes a bite of her dinner.

You blush immediately, thinking of Yeosang’s arm across In Su’s throat this morning, “Yeah,”

Ji Ah notices how you’re suddenly quiet, the way you’ve pulled back a bit, your eyes studying the condensation on the glass bottle in front of you. “Hey,” she interrupts, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to poke fun, I was just trying to make you feel better. What’s going on?”

Tears gather in your eyes, “I just don’t like feeling so helpless.”

“I know,” she nods sympathetically.

“I also really don’t want anyone’s pity,” you swipe the tears from your eyes, “last time this happened everyone one around me treated me like I was a poor little girl.” Your words are true even now. You’re so grateful for the boys, and you do love the way they care for you, but the way they flocked around you in the studio made you feel like a bird with a broken wing, and it made you want to scream.

“You’re not,” Ji Ah insists, and when you meet her eyes again you see a strong determined fire there.

“I know,” you sigh, sniffing back tears and biting the inside of your cheek.

Ji Ah looks over you carefully, “Have you ever boxed?”

Your brow furrows instantly, “What?”

“Boxing, you know,” she mimes a punch with her closed fists up by her cheeks, “have you ever thought about it?”

“Not so much,” you tell her honestly, “I’m more of a yoga and meditation type,”

“Hmm,” she leans forward with her elbows on the table, as if she’s letting you in on a conspiratorial secret, “I think you should try it.”

“Do you box?” You ask, fully surprised. Ji Ah is small, and though she’s fit, you can hardly imagine her throwing a punch let alone sparring and taking one.

“I have since I moved to Seoul,” she nods, “boxing and self-defense. There’s a gym not too far from the office and my apartment that I go to.”

She’s full of surprises and you can’t help but ask, “What made you want to?”

She smiles at you softly and shrugs, “I didn’t feel safe anywhere, I was too anxious all the time in such a big city. No one should have to feel that way.”

You think it over, chewing your lip and taking another drink. Looking up to Ji Ah you say, “I’m not very strong,”

She shakes her head, “You’re stronger than you think.”

“I don’t know that I could hit someone,”

She thinks about this for a second and then presses you, “This morning when this asshole had you cornered, were you angry?” You’ve never heard her curse before, and suddenly the image of Ji Ah that you thought you had was changing before your very eyes.

“Of course, I was angry,” you admit.

“Then I’m telling you, you could hit someone.” She says with finality.

“But,” you trail off, and Ji Ah cuts you off cleanly.

“Have you ever felt scared like that before?” She asks.

Your eyes flick down to your untouched meal, an image of In Su passing through your mind. The security guard backstage at the concert venue. Boys in school who made comments to make you feel small. Grown men who made advances knowing you were too young.

You don’t even have to answer her for her to know, but you nod anyway.

“Then take one class with me. If you hate it, I’ll never mention it again.”

“When?”

“I go every Tuesday and Thursday,” she says, “your pick.”

“Okay,” you sigh, “one class.”

Ji Ah grins and nods, “I promise you, you’ll feel so in control afterwards you’ll keep coming back.”

“We’ll see,” you wave her off with a smile, the conversation now lightening.

You both talk over dinner for another hour, and then another hour over drinks long after the meal has been cleared away. You have so much more in common with her than you ever originally realized, especially when at a table with the full group where Chae and Iseul command so much of the room’s attention.

When your phone buzzes a few times in your pocket, you apologize to Ji Ah and pull it out to check your messages, and unsurprisingly all of the notifications are from the group chat, including the responses to your message from earlier that you hadn’t read.

y/n, we talked and of course we’ll give you whatever you need, but after this morning would you just let us know whenever you’re safely at ji ah’s for the night? – Yeosang’s calm and rational tone is evident even in his text messages.

and if there’s anything you do need just call us. – Mingi’s message makes you smile.

Those had come through thirty minutes after your message, so you’re sure they had talked as a group together about how to handle things. You’re sure that to them this feels like the first conflict in your relationship, the closest thing you’ve had yet to a fight, even though you needing space has less to do with them and more to do with your own feelings. The next set of messages were from minutes ago and when you glance at the time you realize why they must be nervous.

hey i know we’re giving you space… but we just got home from schedules and haven’t heard from you. please let us know you’re safe. – Yunho’s message makes your heart clench.

we’re just worried about you - San’s message is signed with a heart like always.

y/n? – Wooyoung’s message hangs there and you can feel their concern from here.

You glance up to Ji Ah, “Can I ask you another favor?”

“Sure,” she nods.

“I know this is a huge imposition,” you say, “but I don’t really want to go back to my apartment after this morning. Could I crash on your couch tonight? Just tonight,”

“Of course,” she nods profusely, “you can stay longer if you think this guy is hanging around.”

“No, no,” you shake your head, “that’s not necessary,”

Ji Ah watches as you focus back on your phone and tap out a reply.

with ji ah, and i’m safe. i am staying with her tonight but i’ll be home tomorrow after work. x – The rest you can explain to them tomorrow.

“y/n,” Ji Ah’s voice snaps you out of your attention on your phone, “are you dating someone?”

“Dating?”

She narrows her eyes and gestures to your phone with a nod of her head, “Yeah, are you seeing someone?”

“Nope,” you shake your head, lying easily and tucking away your phone, “just messaging back a friend. Sorry about that,”

“No, no,” she waves, “I was just wondering.”

You wrap up drinks easily from here, Ji Ah’s apartment is only two blocks away and easy to get to. It feels good to have a friend again, to have a place to stay and to spend the night not thinking about how you were victimized. You spend the night talking, up far too late when you both have busy work days tomorrow, but neither of you really care. Ji Ah puts on cheesy movies, and you eat a little too much junk food, and before you know it, it’s morning and you’re borrowing a change of clothes.

Your first boxing class would be the following day, Ji Ah playfully telling you she was going to drag you there if she had to, but now that you’ve had a night to sit with the idea, you’re excited. You’re ready to regain some control, to establish yourself differently. When you left your hometown for Seoul you had shed so much of your old life to become this new person, the person you had been trying to find for the past four years. If Ji Ah was right, this was going to be another step forward towards becoming her.

~next chapter will be posted sunday, 11/06 at 10:00 AM ET

#into the aurora taglist

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honeyhotteoks · 3 years ago

Text

into the aurora - chapter twenty (ot8)

chapter twenty: hot and bothered

chapter summary: schedules just aren't aligning with the boys... and you find yourself a little desperate for someone to touch you

warnings: this is nothing but a smut a thon, everyone's horny; shower sex, female masturbation, fingering, suggestive sexual language, thigh riding, oral sex (f receiving), hand jobs, rough quickies, gratuitous use of jagiya/jagi/baby/babe

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, smut

word count: 6.3K

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You’re not exactly sure how long you’ve been standing under the hot water trying to stop imagining any one of your partners inside of you, but eventually you have to give up resisting and do something about it. It’s been a little over a week since you had been with any of them, not a free minute in their schedules to relax together let alone have sex. A week used to be fine, more than fine when you were living on your own. Now you are used to a new tempo, and your body keeps reminding you what it's missing.

You’re up early this morning, earlier than their alarms start going off. You woke up with a start in the middle of a dream. Seonghwa’s head had been between your thighs, and when you rocket into consciousness you realize you’re covered in sweat and as wet as you’ve ever been.

A cold shower seemed to be the best option to cool off before work and try to get your suddenly insatiable sex drive in check, but as the minutes go on, you just keep turning up the heat of the water and thinking about them more. San’s tongue on your nipples, Yunho buried inside you, Hongjoong’s hand tight in your hair. At a flickering image of Yeosang hiking up your leg and teasing your clit with the head of his cock you sigh and lean against the tile wall.

If you don’t do something about this, you’re going to combust.

At the thought of Wooyoung bending you over his desk, you slip a hand between your thighs and dip your middle finger between your wet folds. You’re shockingly sensitive, and you stifle a moan already, starting to slowly circle your clit and applying pressure little by little.

Your eyes drift closed, and an image of Jongho lifting you into his arms makes you quiver. You haven’t slept with him yet, but that doesn't mean you haven’t exchanged some heated glances with each other, and you know when you finally do it’s going to be good. For now, you can imagine - his broad hands holding you up by your thighs, your back pinned up against the wall.

You picture San kissing his way down your throat, his hot mouth working down over your chest and belly, pushing a finger inside you and teasing your clit with the tip of his tongue. You rock your hand a little faster, dipping your fingers down to catch more of your slick wetness and massage your swollen nub.

San’s fingers are replaced with Seonghwa’s - long delicate fingers pumping in and out of your core, and you arch your hand and shift your hips forward to sink one finger inside yourself, then another. A soft panting moan erupts from your throat, but you hope the sound of the shower covers it well.

Yunho’s teasing voice echoes in your ear, and your mind blends the images together - him behind you and holding you open wide, Seonghwa inside you, Yeosang pinning your wrists to the bed as he palms his cock. You can barely breathe at the thought, and you knead your breast with your free hand, tweaking your nipples as you rock desperately into your hand to get the right amount of friction.

You imagine your hand is Mingi’s now, remembering the way he had fingered you before, and you chase the feeling frantically. You can’t quite reach it, but you’re close, the promise of their touches almost enough to get you there.

When the door to the bathroom opens suddenly you gasp, pulling your hands away from yourself and pushing off the tile wall, your legs shaking and your core pulsing at the sudden lack of sensation.

“Um,” you manage, “good morning?”

“You’re using up all the hot water, babe,” Mingi’s deep morning voice murmurs, and you hear the door shut.

You blush red, his voice sending a tight coil of heat through you, and being caught by the man you were just imagining has you more than a little flustered. You exhale slow and then respond, “I’m sorry, I’ll be out in just a minute,”

“It’s okay,” Mingi says, and you can practically see the smile on his face.

You’re about to respond when Mingi pushes back the shower curtain just enough to poke his head in. You gasp, not expecting him to intrude, and on a reflex your arm flies up to cover your breasts. “Mingi!”

He directs his gaze to the corner of the shower, but doesn’t leave, “Sorry,” he says, “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,”

Your shoulders relax, you don’t really mind except for the fact that you had just been picturing his fingers inside you and he’s never really seen you naked. You shake your head, “No, it’s okay, just give me a minute and I’ll be done and you can have the shower.”

He doesn’t respond right away, instead you watch as he chews on his inner cheek for just a moment before turning his head toward you again and leveling you with his direct gaze, “You know, this would go a lot faster if you just let me help you.”

“Wh-what?” Your eyes widen.

“You need to come,” he says, matter of fact, “I can help with that,”

If it’s possible to blush harder, you do.

“Right,” he says and he disappears from your eye line. When you see him again, he’s naked himself and climbing into the shower with you.

“Mingi!” You don’t even know what else to say.

“y/n,” he smiles, teasing a little.

“What are you doing?” You manage.

“Conserving water,” he smirks.

“I’ll get out then,” You glance out the side of the shower to locate a towel.

“Babe,” Mingi interrupts you, moving closer and crowding you back against the tile wall, “are you really going to tell me you’re not worked up?”

“I’m fine,” you murmur.

“This is fine?” He ghosts his thumb over your painfully erect nipple and the sudden pleasure of it pulls a stammered moan from deep inside you. He smiles, “I think you’re as horny as the rest of us,” he kneads your breast softly and flicks your nipple, “and I have no idea why you aren’t letting me help you.”

“I’m clearly an idiot,” you drop your head back against the tile.

He laughs and grins, “Just relax then,”

You nod, unable to respond as he dips his head and captures your nipple in his mouth. He rolls his tongue over the pebbled bud and flicks it steadily, and your eyes fall closed again as you shudder a breath. His kisses spread, his large hands sliding down your sides to cup your hips, and his lips making their way down your chest, over your breasts, and lower still. Your eyes flutter open and through the steam you see Mingi dropping to his knees in front of you, his hands massaging your thighs and his lips sinking lower to press against your mound.

“Oh god,” you breathe and he smiles against your skin.

“Here,” he widens your legs a bit more and you tilt your hips forwards.

“Please,” you murmur.

“Shh,” he kisses your skin again, “everyone will hear you,”

A soft groan escapes your lips and you drop your head back against the tile again, your hand anchored on his shoulder for purchase.

He drags a finger through your slit and smiles again, “You do need some help,”

Your hips jerk as he finger presses over your clit, but it’s nothing compared to the sensation of his mouth when he finally leans in and sinks his tongue into your folds. You intake a breath sharply and his hands massage your hips, relaxing you into his touches and sending your brain into a spiral. He alternates between a firm drag of his tongue and flicks and sucks, nuzzling into you with fevered desperation like he wants to taste more and more of you.

You were close to coming before, and now with his hands on you it’s a matter of moments before you do. He opens you up wider, a sure hand under your thigh to raise your left leg up and over his shoulder, and he holds you incredibly still and steady with his hands locked onto your hips. Your hand that grips his shoulder slides up his wet back and locks into his hair, your other hand scrambles to hang onto the shower curtain rod for extra stability.

“Mingi, please,” you beg, rolling your hips unconsciously towards him.

“Come,” he murmurs as he takes a breath, diving back to suck sharply on your overstimulated clit.

“Don’t stop,” you urge him, “just like that and I’ll,” your words die in your throat, and your eyes press tightly together as you muffle the sound of your moans, “I’ll,” you whine again, hand tight in his hair.

He leans in harder, burying himself even closer and presses his tongue as deeply inside you as he can before he drags it back up and focuses the attention on your clit. Your hand drops from the curtain rod to your breast and you flick your nipple, eyes opening to watch him as he eats at you.

The pressure builds up, and you flick your nipple sharply as he delivers a pointed suck. After over a week of nothing, the orgasm hits you like thunderclap and you bite down to stop the deep moan in your chest from releasing. Your legs give just a little and you slip, but Mingi’s hands on your hips press back and pin you to the shower wall, leaving you to hold yourself up with a hand on his head and his shoulder.

His mouth slows, but doesn’t quite leave you, not until you’re fully spent and arching your hips away from his mouth to disconnect him. He takes a breath when he leans back, his chest heaving and he smiles, kissing across your trembling inner thigh before he drops your leg back and eases himself off the shower floor back to stand.

“Better?” He murmurs, still holding you.

“Mhm,” you can’t completely form words yet, but you smile and nod.

He leans in, kissing you slowly, but when he shifts you feel the hot and hard length of his cock against your thigh and break your mouths apart, looking down between your bodies. He’s large, long and thick like Yunho, maybe even a little more, and you can’t help but smile when you think about the two tallest members being so equally gifted.

“Mingi,” you murmur, reaching down and brushing his cock with your fingertips, “can I have you?”

“Now?” He asks, squeezing you gently.

“I want you,” you lock eyes with him, “do we have time?”

“Not much,” he admits, “but come here,”

You nod, eager, and spread your legs again, but when he leans forwards the height difference has his hips slotting against you too high. You reach for his shoulders, using him as an anchor and press up on your tiptoes, opening one leg up for him. He holds it open, and dips low, the head of his cock dragging over your clit but still not hitting the right angle for him to thrust up into your aching heat.

“Hang on,” he says, hoisting you up a bit in his arms, your feet are fully off the shower floor now and he controls your movement with his hands on your hips but he’s holding your weight fully suspended and you hang off his shoulders.

“This can’t be good for you,” you smile up at him.

“I got it,” he shakes his head, “come here,”

Mingi takes a step back to the shower wall and you settle your back on the tile. He lines up with your entrance and slowly pushes in, the stretch of him pushing you open wide and leaving you gasping.

“Okay?” He checks, glancing from where his cock has started to disappear inside you to your face.

“Uh huh,” you sigh, holding onto his shoulders a little more tightly, “keep going,”

He pushes forwards more, sinking another inch or so inside you and he sighs heavy, his hands tight on your hips as he drags your body forward onto his thick length. The stretch at this angle though isn’t working, and when you try to shift your hips to adjust it slightly you both slip a little and brace yourselves against the side wall.

His face lights up in a laugh and he leans his forehead against yours, “This is harder than it looks,”

“Let me down, baby,” you press a quick kiss to his lips.

He slides out of you and helps you down onto your feet again before straightening up and running a hand through his damp hair.

“Okay come here,” you tug him forwards so he towers over you as you lean back against the wall, “it’s my turn to make you come.”

His eyes darken and he bites his lip, “Yeah?”

“Mhm,” you draw him closer, and he braces himself on the wall above you, “it’s only fair,”

“Yeah,” he breathes as your hand wraps around his cock, sliding up and down to give him some relief.

“More?” You check, glancing up at him to make sure your pace is good for him.

He nods, dropping one of his hands to lazily palm your breast and you speed up your hand just enough, making sure to roll the soft part of your palm over the head of his cock, dragging the bead of precum down his shaft.

When he tweaks your nipple just right your legs tighten and you sigh. Mingi dips a little lower to catch your eyes, “Again?”

“Um,” your pace working his cock falters for a moment and you nod, “yes?”

He grins at your expression and cups your cheek for a second, “If you need more, just tell me,”

“I need more,” you sigh, and he nods with your words.

He shifts a bit, and your hand pauses while he does, but when he’s done leaning forward he’s planted his knee between your thighs and pressed it into the shower wall and he taps his thigh, “Come right here,”

It feels revealing, and so much more sensual of an act than anything you’ve done with him before, but he looks hungry and ready for you, so you slide forwards and settle down onto his thigh, dropping your hips comfortably until the pressure on your clit is just right.

Mingi’s hand moves from your waist to your hip to cup your ass, and he presses your body up so that you’re forced to grind yourself on his wet skin. You moan softly, cursing and dropping your head low.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmurs, cupping your cheek and stroking your skin.

“M-Mingi,” your body is hot and wet again, the pressure delicious and essential.

“Don’t stop,” he urges you, “please,”

Bracing yourself on his shoulder again, you start to roll your hips and start to work your hand over him again. He tenses his leg, changing the pressure between your thighs and you groan against him, but you don’t stop your hand this time. You’re determined to make him come, after last time especially. You want to take care of him.

“Baby,” he stutters, and you increase the pressure of your hand just a bit but keep steady on the pace that seems to make him tremble.

His hand on your backside helps you move, ensuring that he matches your pace well. You’re close again, and you know he is too when he grits his teeth and jerks his hips to thrust his cock into your hand.

Your hand slips from his shoulder and drags along his chest, but when your fingers briefly catch on his nipple he pants and curses, his hand on your ass gripping down hard and his eyes blowing wide. You’ve got him now, knowing exactly what he needs, and you smile at him, leaning forwards immediately to kiss his chest before dropping your mouth to his erect nipple.

“y/n,” he stammers, “fuck,”

You hum against him, copying his movements from earlier and swirling your tongue before flicking it steadily, your hand never slowing on his cock.

“God,” he stammers again, no longer focused on helping you come but fully focused on the pleasure you’re giving him.

You speed up your hand, and when you deliver a firm suck to his nipple he chokes out a groan, his hips jerking. He moves you fast, pushing your hand away and wrapping his own around his cock to pump it fast and hard. When your mouth leaves him, mostly in surprise at the change of pace, he whines a little, “Don’t stop,” he begs you.

You drag your thumb over his wet nipple, flicking it steadily, and lean back to watch him, rolling your hips against his thigh some more.

“Fuck,” his eyes lock shut and he collapses over you a little more, coming hot and fast over your belly and breasts. Thick ropes of his release paint your chest and you moan at the sight, holding onto his shoulder again for stability as pleasure bubbles again inside you.

He’s panting, his brain buzzing as he blinks his eyes open and remembers where he is. When he sees you, rutting desperately on his thigh and falling apart against his skin he comes back to himself. Pushing forward he captures your lips, pressing you into a bruising kiss and returns his hand to your hips, helping drag you up and down his thigh.

“Mingi,” you gasp against his mouth, “oh god, baby,”

He doesn’t answer, but knocks you back into the wall with his lips on yours and drags his tongue along yours. You’re so close you can touch it, and with his mouth hot on yours and him helping you along, your body breaks apart in his hands. You come with a cry, your nails digging into his skin where you hold onto him to keep yourself up right, and your vision swims.

His arms wrap around you, easing you off his leg despite the shaking aftershocks, and holds you warmly against his chest. His hand strokes a steady rhythm down your back.

“Oh my god,” you sigh into his chest.

“I know,” he smiles.

As you breathe against him, your senses come back to you and so does the sensation of the water, “Is it cold already?”

“A little,” he straightens up and reaches back for the dial, turning up the heat, “we should hurry though, they’re going to be pissed if the water is ice cold,”

You laugh, stepping away from him and recovering, smoothing your hair away from your face, “Okay, yeah, you’re right,”

You wash quickly, Mingi pouring far too much body wash on you just to have another excuse to fondle you, but it’s welcome, wanted, and you flick him back with water and suds. By the time you get out, the water is too cold for anyone else to use. Mingi wraps you up in a towel and you squeeze the excess water out of your hair before he kisses you softly and brushes through it with his fingers.

He slips out first, disappearing into his bedroom, and then it’s up to you.

Thankfully the hallway is empty when you finally recover yourself. You quietly pad out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around you and damp hair clinging to your back. It’s still early, still quiet, and though you can hear some of their alarms going off it seems like for now you’re in the clear.

With a sigh you head for the kitchen, legs still feeling like jelly after your encounter with Mingi in the bathroom, and you pull open the fridge to search for a water bottle. The cold air hits you and raises all the little hairs up on your body and you shiver, before grabbing a bottle and shutting the fridge.

“Damn,” Wooyoung’s husky voice shocks you and you turn. You are clearly the first person he’s spoken to so far today and he blinks hard, clearing his throat.

He’s wearing nothing but his boxers, and your mouth runs dry again. It makes no sense. For years you were capable of going weeks without sex, without anything, but give it a few weeks with these men and suddenly you’ve become a different person.

“Hey,” you sigh, “you scared me,”

“Uh huh,” his eyes flick over you, “that towel is too small,”

“Please,” you roll your eyes and lean against the counter behind you, “it’s the same size towel you all use. You’re just incorrigible,”

“It looks smaller on you somehow,” he smirks, “it’s kind of indecent,”

“Woo,” you shake your head, but your core pulses at the way he’s staring at you.

“You know it’s been… too long since I’ve touched you,” he glances up, thinking back, “weeks?”

“You touch me everyday,” you smile, “I can hardly shake you off half the time.”

He takes a step forward, biting his lip, “That’s not what I meant,”

“I’m not the one who’s been so busy,” you note, “and then exhausted when you’re not busy.”

He grins suddenly and leans in, caging you with an arm on either side of you, “Oh my god,” he says, his smile like he’s found out a secret, “you’re such a mess right now,”

“What?” Your voice is small, breathy at the way he’s crowding your space, his bare chest so close.

“We’ve been too busy,” he leans down close, “and you’re all pent up. I can tell,”

“Tell how?” You shouldn’t really have said it, every time you banter with him he eats it up like foreplay, and he chuckles.

“You’re blushing,” he smirks, and then he moves. His hand slides through the part in the towel and he pushes it out of the way with ease, finding your slick folds without breaking his eyes from yours and he rocks his fingers along your clit twice before pushing them deep inside you.

The sound that leaves you is stammered and flustered and it only makes him more self satisfied.

“Other people are home, Woo,” you manage, but you don’t sound confident in your words.

He steps closer, massaging your clit and you feel his hardness against your thigh. “I really don’t care,” he says, “I’m just proving a point,”

You swallow back a moan and you’re about to ask what he means when his fingers slide off you and he takes a step back. You collapse a little on the counter, and he bites his lips when he sees the way your legs are trembling. “What the fuck?” you breathe.

“I have to go,” he shrugs, “but it looks like I was right. We’re all painfully hard up,”

“You are so fucking mean,” you shake your head, laughing a little, “I cannot believe you,”

His face softens for a minute, “I’m sorry, I was just playing around. You know I’ll more than make it up to you later,”

Your muscles clench around nothing and he watches carefully as your hips shift. You swallow tight and meet his eyes, “Promise?”

“Mhm,” he smiles, “promise,”

“Morning!” Yunho’s voice from the living room startles you both and you straighten up off the counter and smooth your expression before he can see you. Wooyoung turns towards the island, concealing his hard cock and turning immediately casual and cool.

“Hey,” Wooyoung says, “when are we leaving again?”

“Fifteen,” he replies, “and then everyone else meets us in forty-five.”

“Got it,”

Yunho catches sight of you and smiles, “Morning, pretty,”

“Hey,” you tuck your arms down over the top of your robe to ensure it stays snugly in place and give him a smile back. Wooyoung rolls his eyes over Yunho’s shoulder and jogs off down the hall.

“You’re up early,” he comments, reaching for the coffee grounds.

“Couldn’t sleep,” you reply, “I figured I’d get ready before you all took all the hot water,”

“Ah,” he smiles, “good plan.”

“You feeling good for today?” You know they have a long day ahead - filming content for their next comeback which means they’ll be busy wall to wall for twelve plus hours.

“Yeah,” he nods, “better than yesterday.”

You smooth a hand down his back, settling it over the spot that was paining him yesterday, where you know he’s still wrapped up with KT Tape, “This isn’t so bad, then?”

He shakes his head, “Better after some sleep,”

“Good,” you lean forward to kiss his shoulder quickly and move to step away but he catches your forearm in his hand.

“Hey,” he says, “come here for a sec,”

You swear if he touches you, that will be it. You’d just have to make him late. “What’s up?” You let him pull you back into his chest.

“I’m missing you,” he says, crouching a bit so he can kiss you. He sighs softly against your lips and holds you close, and the kiss is tender, much less laden with fervent innuendo than you expected.

“Me too,” you peck his lips as you pull away.

“If you’re still up later,” he smiles, “can I come bother you?”

“When do you get back?” You ask.

“Maybe around 1?” He grimaces, “I know that’s late, if it’s too late don’t worry.”

It would be worth it just to see him for a little while, so you nod, “If I’m asleep just wake me up,”

He kisses you again and squeezes your arm, “I’m not going to wake you, I don’t want to disturb your sleep,”

“Yunho,” you roll your eyes and nudge him, “wake me up anyways. Even if we’re both too tired, I’d like to see you… we can just sleep if you want,”

“Perfect,” he murmurs, “then I’ll see you tonight,”

“Tonight,” you nod, and watch as jogs out of the kitchen, rushing a little extra now to make it on time.

It’s still a little early for you, so you can take your time getting ready. You make a cup of coffee and head back to your bedroom, ready to pick out an outfit for the day.

You sift through your closet, checking the weather and sighing when you see signs of rain.

The first half of the boys leave, piling into one of their managers cars to go get their makeup and hair done first. The short straws as it were. You can hear the others banging around in the dorm, shower turning off and on, shouted questions at each other to get ready.

You lay out an outfit for yourself and start to unwrap the towel from around you.

The sound of your sliding door draws your attention and you wrap the towel back around yourself, holding it closed at the top. San steps in and slides the door shut behind him. He looks handsome, a little more well rested than the past few days and dressed casually in black pants, boots, and a black t-shirt.

“Hey, baby,” you smile, “you getting ready to go?”

“Soon,” he nods, “I just wanted to say goodbye, I missed you the past couple of days,”

“Everybody’s missing me,” you laugh, reaching out a hand for him.

“Mm,” he nods, “whenever we hit a lot of filming it gets like this for a bit. It’ll go back to normal soon,”

“I know,” you assure him, “I knew it would be like this when we started dating, but I still miss you all when you’re gone for so long.”

He pulls you towards him, wrapping you in his arms, smiling down at you, his eyes crinkled in just the way you like, “Is that right, jagi?”

“Don’t tease,” you say, “I’m allowed to miss my boyfriends,”

“I love when you call us that,” he squeezes you.

You shift in his arms and the towel that you so carefully pinned under your arms loosens with the way you’re held against him. It’s caught between your bodies so it doesn’t fully fall to the floor, but the way that it loosens and drops is unmistakable.

“Oh,” he gathers the towel and rights it, “sorry, jagi,”

You shake your head, brushing off his unnecessary apologies and reach for the top of the towel yourself, but he doesn’t move his own hands.

“San?” He looks suddenly far away.

His eyes move down over your body, and he slides the towel away from one of your breasts, then the other, revealing your still pebbled nipples and sending a rush of blush up your chest. You glance down, and it’s suddenly very apparent how hard he is even through his pants.

San tosses the towel away, descending on you quickly and pushing you both back down on the bed. He pushes your thighs open as he kisses you hard, and you feel his hand between you fumbling for his belt buckle. You moan against his mouth when he finally gets free and shucks off his pants, you suddenly feel nothing but his hard cock pressed against your wet mound.

“I missed you,” he says, reaching between you, checking to see how wet you are and groaning when he finds you slick and wanting.

You make a soft pleased sound at the feeling of his hands on you. It’s like they all knew what you had been fantasizing about in the shower, the way your mind couldn’t keep off any one of them, and now they all want to pull you apart.

San sighs, and in one fluid move he thrusts his cock deep inside you. “I missed your cunt, jagiya,”

Your walls clench around him at his words, your head back and eyes shut, a tight groan on your lips, “Fuck, Sannie,”

He drags out of you, halfway, and then sinks back in with a pointed snap of his hips, “I missed the pretty noises you make,” he tweaks your nipple and you shudder under him.

He thrusts again and your eyes flutter open, “San,” you catch his attention, “do we even have time for this?”

He brushes your cheek, and leans his weight on the bed to check his watch, “Nine minutes,” he says.

“Not a lot of time,” You murmur, but you’re still hooking your legs over his hips and drawing him in deeper.

He smirks, “If I can’t make you come in nine minutes, I don’t deserve to be inside you now,” Your hips jerk against him and he smiles again, “What’s got my girl so needy today?”

He’s holding still on purpose, you know it, but it doesn’t make your legs tremble any less and the pressure of his hips locked down over your clit any less intense. You huff under him softly, “You know why,”

“Mm,” he kisses along your jaw, his hips still unmoving, “tell me anyways,”

You swallow hard and draw him closer with your arms around his shoulders, “Fine,” you roll your hips into him, “No one’s touched me in weeks,”

“Touched you, or fucked you?” He slides a hand into your hair.

His eyes are intense now, and if it’s possible you’d swear that you can feel him growing harder inside of you. At least a minute, maybe two, have passed since he checked the time and you know you don’t have much longer. With another roll of your hips you beg him, “Fucked me, so please, don’t make me wait anymore,”

He sighs above you, tight and controlled, but your words send him over and the hand in your hair tightens on your scalp pleasantly. He hooks his other hand under your thigh, pushing it down towards the mattress and holding you open wide. You hook your own arm around your other leg and drag it back, and the full tilted position of your hips and San starting to drive into you from above has you panting beneath him.

The feeling is intense, filling and warm, and he smiles when he looks between you and sees his cock pushing into you.

“Harder,” you whisper, and his eyes flick up to your face.

He pulls back completely, and then sinks in again, each time he meets your hips now a sharp connecting thrust that rocks his cock perfectly over every aching spot you have.

He drops over you more, his body pressed against you and putting pressure on you in the position but you want him closer, deeper, more completely surrounding you and you moan into his mouth, whispering and begging all the while.

“Close?” He pants in your ear, his fingers gripping you with intensity.

“Just don’t stop,” you cling to him, “Sannie, I’m,”

“I need you to come,” he drives down, his thrusts firm and you can’t do anything but hang onto him and hold yourself open.

His hand slips down the back of your thigh, and at the slight additional push back of your hips you see stars, and you swallow back your moan, releasing hard and silently against him, your body trembling in his hands.

“God,” he chokes, “you’re so tight,”

“Baby,” you whine, dragging his hips into you, your head still spinning, “come,”

Your leg slips from his hand and he collapses over you, his pace no longer measured for your pleasure but desperate and quick. He drops his head against yours, working himself inside you, and finally releases with a muffled groan. His hips stutter as he slows, and he mutters against you, kisses all along your hairline.

“God,” he sighs again, a wide grin on his face as he looks at you.

You giggle, “I’m going to have to get another shower,”

“Sorry,” he pecks your lips.

“How late are you?” You scramble to look at his watch.

He sees the time and shakes his head, “I’ve got two minutes, but that means I have to go,”

“Okay,” you crane up, kissing him and stroking his jaw.

He pulls out of you with a sigh, and quickly cleans himself up before righting his pants and dragging a hand through his hair, “I hate to just leave,”

“I’m good,” you assure him.

“No,” he smiles, “but I just want to cuddle up with you now,”

“Mm,” you sigh, wrapping the towel around yourself again, “I wish we could, but you have a busy day,”

“I know,” he checks his watch again, “that is starting right about now. Alright,” he kisses you once more and takes a step back, “Have a good day, jagi,”

“You too,” you murmur, “be safe.”

He smiles, hand on his chest as he backs out of your room, a heavy sigh on his lips.

The second wave of the boys leave soon after, running for the door and then in moments, you’re back in silence.

You sit alone in the apartment for a little while longer, the morning a bit of a whirlwind. You’re about to get up and make yourself some coffee when your phone dings sharply and you reach for it. The ever busy group chat has a message from Hongjoong.

In the future can we please be more aware of using all the hot water in the morning?

Your hand flies over your mouth and you stare at the chat, not sure how to respond.

sorry, that’s on me. will do next time. - Mingi’s text appears.

Wooyoung can’t help but respond with - lol

You wonder if he heard you and Mingi this morning, or saw him leaving the bathroom, and chose his moment in the kitchen to torture you.

You tap out a quick text before tapping your phone aside - have a safe shoot! hwaighting!

You spend some time finishing your morning routine, your phone lying forgotten on the bed for a while, but on your way out the door you grab it as you rush to meet one of their managers for a ride into work. You finally check it when you’re in the backseat and have a moment of peace before the work day begins.

You have a text from Yeosang, but when you open it, you realize it’s not in the group chat where it normally would be, and instead he sent it directly to you alone.

didn’t see you this morning- i hope you have a good day at work and you’re well - he says.

Quickly you respond, seeing that his text was from twenty minutes ago - i am, i hope you are too. x

i’ll be thinking of you today - Something about imagining that in his voice makes your gut tighten.

will you? - You tap back.

i’ll have trouble thinking of anything else. i didn’t get to kiss you this morning. - Unconsciously, you cross your legs.

you’ll have to make it up to me tomorrow then. - You smile to yourself as you respond.

then i hope you’re wearing something pretty for me today. - Your lips part as you read his message, a soft inhale of breath.

It takes you a moment to respond, your brain jumping from thought to thought, but after a moment you reply - im always wearing something pretty for my boys

The car feels suddenly warm and you put the phone away to get some calm clarity, taking a sip of your coffee and trying to remember that you have important things at work to do today. Your brain can’t just be full of them. When the car finally slides to a stop in the KQ garage, you thank their manager and gather your things. As you check your phone once more, you see another message from Yeosang.

we’ll have to find something that’s just for me then.

Now there’s no chance that you won’t spend the rest of your day thinking of him too.

~new chapter coming sunday, 10/23 at 10:00 AM ET

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honeyhotteoks · 3 years ago

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into the aurora - chapter nineteen (ot8)

chapter nineteen: together

chapter summary: the morning after your night with yunho, you spend breakfast with the boys.

warnings: nothing specific, some slight suggestive language.

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, smut

word count: 4.6K

(previous chapter) (next chapter) | AO3 | masterlist

Yunho sleeps soundly while you start your morning routine, pulling on your leggings and sports bra and rolling out your yoga mat. It had taken you a few minutes to successfully extricate yourself from his arms. Sometime during sleep he had pulled you into his chest and locked his arms around you, his face buried in your neck while he snored gently. When you finally got free, he replaced you with your pillow, curling his large body around it and falling deeply back asleep as you leave him in bed.

Stepping onto your mat you let things drop away, sweeping your hair up into a ponytail and exhaling long and low, your eyes falling closed. As you start to move with slow and deliberate stretches, you feel the little aches in your tight muscles from the night before start to release. Your routine is so second nature now that you move steadily with each inhale and exhale, your eyes still closed, minutes flying by without you noticing.

You don’t even hear Yunho stirring and pulling himself awake, but when you finally`1 finish with your legs crossed and back straight, you’re facing the bed and Yunho’s sitting up against the headboard, eyes on you and an easy smile on his face.

“Oh,” you jump, a little startled, and rest a hand on your chest, “I didn’t know you were awake,”

“Mm,” he nods, “not for too long, I just didn’t want to interrupt you.”

“Thanks,” you smile, and stretch yourself out before standing up.

“Come here,” he tosses his legs over the side of the bed so he’s sitting up properly now and catches your hand when you start towards him, pulling you in between his open knees.

“Good morning,” you sigh when he slips his hands around your hips and squeezes softly.

“Morning,” he looks you over and smiles. His voice is still a little husky with sleep when he says, “god, you’re pretty,”

Yunho pulls you into him to kiss you, tender and warm, his hands roaming freely over you now from the small of your back to the curve of your backside, up to brush along your breast.

You smile against his mouth before pushing him back a little, “I need a shower,”

“Mm, I definitely don’t mind,” he quirks an eyebrow at you and pulls gently at the top of your leggings, letting the fabric snap back into place a moment later.

“Yunho,” you shake your head and kiss him again, but it’s quick this time and you step out of his hands.

“Okay, okay,” he flops back on your bed with a smile and crosses his arms behind his head, watching as you move back to roll up your yoga mat and finish your morning routine, “shower first,”

You toss a grin at him, and you don’t even think twice when you unzip the bag on your desk and drop your daily medications out, taking them quickly with water before replacing them in their designated spot. When you look back at him, he’s sitting up again, a look on his face.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he shakes his head immediately, but you watch his eyes unconsciously flick towards the bag on your desk, and of course he is unsurprisingly on high alert after your conversation last night. If he was as much of a worrier as Mingi made him out to be, he had to be jumping to conclusions.

“I’m fine,” you assure him.

“Can I ask?” He says simply now that you’ve opened the door just a little to acknowledge it.

“They’re anti-depressants and anti-anxiety,” you step back towards him, “there’s nothing you have to worry about, I just don’t really like to advertise it.”

“Oh,” he nods, and you can see him thinking. After a beat he says, “Are they helping?”

You sit on the edge of the bed next to him and nod, “For a long time now, it’s just part of my routine.”

“That’s good then,” he nods, mostly to himself, and leans in for a quick, soft kiss, “I won’t mention it to anyone else.”

“Mingi knows,” you clarify for him, “and I’m not embarrassed or anything, I just don’t really like to talk about it.”

“I get that,” he nods immediately, “and I’m sorry if it felt like I was prying.”

You shake your head and slip your hand in his, “Not at all,”

He pulls you in for another kiss, lazy and slow this time, his nose nuzzling yours when he shifts his head from one side to the other. He murmurs against your lips, “Breakfast?”

With a laugh you lean back to look at him, “Are you cooking?”

“Sure,”

“Can you even cook?” So far, you’ve only seen him grill meat.

“I have cooked,” he grins, “come on, let’s go.”

He pulls you up and out the door, his hands never leaving you, and you’re instantly grateful for the way he saw your boundary line, acknowledged it, and took a step back. Mingi, as usual, was right about him, and Yunho is surprising you the longer you spend time with him.

In the kitchen, Yeosang is already drinking his morning cup of tea and Seonghwa is up too, scrolling through his phone and drinking his coffee. When you and Yunho stumble into the living room, his lips attached to your neck and his arms wrapped around you from behind, Seonghwa laughs.

“Finally,” he grins.

Yeosang snorts a laugh into his tea and turns to look at you both, giving you a smile.

“Hwa,” you roll your eyes and Yunho blushes behind you, his ears running a little red.

“What?” Seonghwa shrugs, “I’m not the one who’s just stared at her for weeks from across the room,”

“Don’t be mean,” you smile and squeeze Yunho’s forearm that’s still wrapped around you.

Yunho untangles himself from hanging on you and kisses your head, moving into the kitchen and opening the fridge.

“Is he cooking?” Yeosang questions, eyebrows raised.

“Apparently,” you smile, and you catch Yunho rolling his eyes as he roots around in the cupboards.

“You’re cooking?” Seonghwa leans around the bar and asks.

“I have literally cooked for all of you before,” he sighs, “now shut up and let me do something romantic for the girl.”

Seonghwa grins, loving the way he’s making Yunho squirm a little, and then turns to you, “Good morning,”

“Hi, Hwa,” you smile, moving into his space and prodding him in the ribs, “be nice,”

“I’m always nice,” he protests softly, pulling you into his waiting arms, “but this is what older brothers do,”

“A year older,” Yunho grumbles from the kitchen and when you glance over you see that he’s still staring inside the fridge and assessing ingredients.

“Still,” Seonghwa shrugs and then shifts to press his lips to yours.

You relax into his touch, kissing him back until he leans back and gives you a squeeze, “Coffee?”

“Please,” you nod eagerly and he laughs a little before stepping around you and joining Yunho in the kitchen.

You ease onto the barstool next to Yeosang and stretch your tired limbs a little more, “Hey,” you nudge him.

“Morning,” he smiles, catching you for a quick kiss before wrapping an arm comfortably around you.

When Yunho takes a ttukbaegi off the shelf and sets it on the counter in front of you by a carton of eggs you smile, “I haven’t had steamed eggs for breakfast in a while,”

“Yeah?” He glances up at you, “you like them, right?”

“Oh, yeah,” you nod enthusiastically and his shoulders relax a little now that he knows he hasn’t picked wrong.

“Good,” he smiles as he opens the carton of eggs, “they’re my favorite.”

“They’re also easy,” Seonghwa teases, but you notice the way he takes the bottle of mirin from the cupboard and delivers it to him without further comment.

Before Yunho tries to jump in and defend his choice you shake your head, “Easy and simple isn’t a bad thing, staples are staples for a reason.”

Yunho grins wide, but keeps his eyes focused on his task of cracking three eggs into the earthenware pot.

“Can I help?” You ask him.

He shakes his head, “Just relax,”

When you moved here, you really didn’t expect them to be so adept at taking care of you, but it’s such a welcome thing. After years of living on your own and fending for yourself, skipping breakfasts more often than not, the way they’ve come to care for you is tenderness in and of itself.

Yunho moves with confidence despite his lack of experience in the kitchen, and you watch as he chops a bundle of spring onions with sure movements of his knife. Behind you, the rest of the house wakes and starts to move. San and Wooyoung stumble in next, arguing quietly about something but the minute they see you their expressions clear.

San wraps himself around you from behind, pinning Yeosang’s arm between your back and his chest, but he doesn’t seem to mind. Yeosang sighs, but San just pulls him in too and ignores his little noise of protest.

Wooyoung kisses you fast, craning around to even reach your lips, “Hey, baby,” his smile is full of flirtatious energy even this early and you roll your eyes at him.

Yunho adds water and salt to the pot along with the mirin and green onion, and as he whisks them all together Wooyoung leans over and assesses the ingredients he’s using.

“Sugar,” he says, nudging his friend, “don’t forget the sugar.”

“I know,” Yunho protests, but you’re not sure if he actually did know before this moment.

“And baking powder,” Wooyoung suggests again, “just a little. It helps them get really puffy,”

“Woo,” Yunho looks over at him, leveling him with a look.

“What?” Wooyoung balks a little at how irritated Yunho seems and throws his hands up, “I didn’t realize this was a romantic gesture thing, I thought this was a making eggs thing,”

“Woo,” you jump in, waving him over, “come here, stop antagonizing him.”

Yunho gives you a quick smile, adding a pinch of sugar quietly and crossing over to the stove to start to heat up the burner. Seonghwa delivers your cup of coffee then, and leans on the counter with his hip, “It’s hot,” he warns you gently.

“Thank you,” you blow softly on the steaming liquid and let the warmth of the cup seep into your hands. You lean into San’s arms, laughing to yourself a little when you sigh, “When I said yes to living here, I didn’t think I’d be mediating spats between my eight boyfriends, but I guess it makes sense,”

Wooyoung laughs, sharp and harsh, clapping once and seeming thrilled at the rise it’s getting out of Yunho, who in all this banter really just wants to do something nice and sweet for you.

“Boyfriends?” San says, looking down at you.

“Well,” you realize with the exception of Yunho, they’re all looking at you with wide eyes, “yeah, I mean… aren’t you?”

“We are,” Yunho interrupts immediately, assuaging your spike of nerves, though he’s still focused on whisking up the egg mixture.

“Exactly,” Yeosang says, “you just haven’t said it before,”

“It sounds nice though, doesn’t it?” Seonghwa smooths a hand over yours, “I like it,”

“Boyfriend,” San repeats, mostly to himself before he squeezes you and kisses your temple, “It does sound good when you say it,”

“Well in that case,” Wooyoung leans forwards on the counter, “that would make you our girlfriend, wouldn’t it?”

“Uh,” you’re a little caught by his direct and sudden gaze and you nod, “yeah,”

“Good,” he quirks an eyebrow at you, “get used to hearing that all the time.”

Seonghwa smirks as he watches Wooyoung flirting with you, and San drags you closer to his chest. Yeosang’s hand slips from between you and San and settles on your thigh, fingers tightening just a little.

“Alright,” Yunho’s tone makes your head snap up, and despite the jealous glint in his eyes as he looks at you between his best friends, he settles his gaze on Wooyoung, “how much baking powder?”

“Like a half teaspoon,” he replies instantly, no trace of teasing in his tone.

“Cool,” Yunho clears his throat, and reluctantly adds, “thanks,”

You want to point out how jealous they’re being of each other, how clingy and handsy, and how suddenly out of nowhere they’re not waiting until they’re in private to flirt with you as directly as they’re doing now, but any words you’re forming in your mind disappear the minute the rest of the boys make their way into the kitchen.

“Is Yunho cooking?” Mingi squints his tired eyes as he pulls down the giant container of whey protein from the cabinet.

“Oh my god,” Yunho groans, “not you too.”

You fall apart into hysterics, pulling yourself away from San and Yeosang, winding around Seonghwa so you can make it to Yunho who’s now standing at the stove, stirring the frothy egg mixture. You wrap your arms around his middle from behind, pressing a warm kiss to his back, “Don’t listen to them,” you give him a squeeze, “thank you for cooking for me,”

“Mm,” He murmurs, but he lays his hand over yours.

You shift back, coming to stand next to him and watch him work, and as you do you hear Hongjoong and Jongho make their way into the shared living space.

“What’s going on?” Hongjoong says.

“Yunho is making our girlfriend breakfast,” Wooyoung says, and you can hear the teasing grin in his voice.

“Girlfriend,” Hongjoong repeats, like he’s not used to the word in his mouth.

You walk back towards the rest of them, leaning on the bar, “Okay, okay,” you sigh, “don’t make a big thing of it.”

Hongjoong smiles, “We all have to leave in thirty minutes,” he says, “Yunho are you going to be ready?”

“Yep,” He says and when you glance back at him you see that he now has the lid on the pot and is fixing the rest of your breakfast - small squares of seaweed, steamed rice, and chopped kimchi ready to pair with the egg.

“Is it a late day?” You check with Hongjoong.

“Not too bad,” He shakes his head, “we should be back around eight,”

“Should we have dinner tonight?” You ask, “Together?”

You’re starting to understand how rare it is that schedules overlap well and at dinner time no less, but the prospect of sharing time with all of them together is something you crave.

“That sounds perfect,” Seonghwa offers.

Hongjoong nods, “Let’s,”

Jongho moves to shift past you, and you feel his hands anchor themselves on your hips as he slides behind you, pressing a fast kiss to your temple, “Dinner’s good,” he says, unfazed like he didn’t just kiss you in front of everyone, “we’ll pick up?”

“Um,” Your stomach flip flopped at the feeling of his hands on you and nod as you shake off the sudden daze, “that would be great, I might be at the office late.”

“Hmm,” San’s nose scrunches at your words, “why late?”

You sigh and lean back on the island, “Chae and I are working on a project and we’re a little behind,”

“You shouldn’t work so much, jagi,” San squeezes your arm gently.

You roll your eyes and give him a nudge, but before anyone can say anything Yunho jumps back in.

“Breakfast,” He smiles, “now give her back her seat and let her eat,” Yunho narrows his eyes pointedly at Wooyoung who had taken your bar seat next to Yeosang when you had gotten up.

Wooyoung hops up and sticks his tongue out briefly at Yunho, but then pulls the chair out for you. As you sit down, Yunho arranges your breakfast in front of you, seeming a little proud that he clearly did well with the egg.

“This is perfect, thank you,” You smile as you tuck in. Yeosang slides his hand back to its place on your thigh, and you feel Wooyoung’s hand spread along your back. They are so affectionate today, touchy and flirty and warm, and as you eat it takes a harsh reminder from Hongjoong about how little time they have to pull them away from you.

You don’t have to start getting ready until they leave, so you eat in peace, comforted by the busy sounds of the house behind you. Your mouth is full of food when Yunho wraps his arms around you from behind and kisses your head, “Everything good?”

“Mm,” You nod, mouth full and laughing.

He pokes your full cheek and smiles, “Cute,”

All you can manage is an eye roll but he kisses you again and steps away, “Last night was nice,”

You nod, swallowing and laughing, Yunho grinning at you all the while, “It really was,”

“We should do it again sometime,” He shrugs a little.

“Oh?” You raise an eyebrow at him.

“The date,” He shakes his head, his eyes widening when he realizes what he implied, “the date, obviously.”

“Mhm,” You push yourself up from the table, stepping close into his space until his back connects with the wall behind him, and you rest your hands on his chest, “definitely, the date.”

He clears his throat softly and settles his hands on your upper arms, “And you know,” he’s shifted a little, back to flirting, “and whatever happens after the date, happens.”

“I like it,” You murmur, craning up a bit on tip toe.

He presses down and catches your mouth, gathering you closer with supportive hands as he kisses you soundly. You’re lost in it for a moment before the sound of someone loudly and intentionally clearing their throat breaks your lips apart.

“Three minutes,” Hongjoong says evenly.

“Yeah,” Yunho calls back, “got it,” with an apologetic smile he steps you back and slides out of your arms.

“Go,” You tell him, “I’ll see you tonight,”

He’s out of sight a moment later, and you move back into the main part of the kitchen to make a second cup of coffee.

“Did you get the email from Eden?” Hongjoong asks, pouring himself a cup into a travel mug.

“Mhm, the meeting tomorrow is moving?”

He nods, “And I’ll be at the studio after, if you’re around. I have a few things I want to show you,”

“Of course,” You nod enthusiastically, “I’ll be there.”

“Good,” He softens, “I’d like that.”

There’s a bit of a pause as you reach for the bowl of sugar, and Hongjoong seizes the moment of quiet to pull you close and press a hot kiss to your lips. You make a squeak of surprise, but let him maneuver you closer, his hand slipping into your hair.

“Mm,” You pull back, “you have to go,”

“I know,” He dives in again, his tongue flicking along yours.

His phone dings, a little alarm to tell him it’s actually time to get everyone into the cars, and he finally leans away, leaving you blushing and breathless. “Have a good day at work,” he finally says.

“You too,” You smile, “have a good shoot.”

He kisses you once more, quick and punctuating his goodbye, before he starts to gather the boys and herd them out into the garage. They’re gone fast, rushing as always, and once the house is empty you start the rest of your routine.

At work, half the office is away for the day, leaving you and Chae huddled close together and reviewing the next several weeks of work ahead. Comeback is still a few months away, but the lead up was a long one. Even still, you’re shocked by how many moving parts must slot together just right to produce what you see during three weeks of comeback.

It’s nearly four o’clock by the time you surface from staring at your computer screen with her and your eyes are aching, stomach growling from the lack of lunch.

“God,” Chae sighs, “I feel like we’re not even making a dent,”

“I know,” You commiserate, and for a brief moment you think the boys might just make it back to the dorms before you do.

“Do you think we’ll get everything done by Friday?” You ask her.

“We better,” Chae groans, “I haven’t missed a deadline yet.”

She shakes out her arms, stretching her neck and standing, “I’m taking a lap around the building and then get some coffee. I’ll bring you back one?”

“Please,” You nod, knowing that she means she’s going to head downstairs to the small cafe instead of just grabbing a reheated cup from the pot in the kitchenette, “make it extra strong or I’ll start to fall asleep,”

“I know,” She grabs her wallet, “my eyes are crossing,”

You watch her walk away, making a beeline for the elevators and the spike of caffeine you both need. You take the moment of quiet to check your phone, sliding through the group chat and catching up on messages. It’s mostly quiet today with the boys filming, but you smile at the few messages that have bounced back and forth. In a separate chat, you read through a few updates from their main manager. You’ve been added to the chat for anything related to the dorms or household updates, and while you always feel a little uneasy participating in the chat, you’re glad to be kept in the loop.

Only a few of their managers and staff really know about you, and at this point you’ve spent more time with the drivers than managers directly, but they’re overwhelmingly kind and don’t treat you with anything less than respect. You read through the second chat, their manager organizing a dinner pick up later since they won’t be off set until seven or eight. Everyone’s claimed their dinner, clear and concise orders, but you smile when you hit Jongho’s. He’s written out his dinner, and yours, already knowing exactly what you want from the restaurant. He’s quiet, but clearly observant.

A hot latte drops in front of you and Chae smirks as she collapses into her chair with a dramatic sigh, “What’s got you all smiley?”

“Nothing,” You click the lock on your phone to darken the screen and set it aside.

Chae narrows her eyes, “We’re friends, you know,”

“Yeah,” You nod, but a little hesitation in your tone, unsure of where she’s going.

“If you’re dating someone,” she raises an eyebrow, “you have to tell me.”

You laugh and shake your head, “I do?”

“Mhm,” Chae takes a long sip of her own coffee, “I’m a naturally curious person, indulge me,”

“I’m not,” You smile, “I’m just in a group chat with some friends,”

She huffs, “Well you should start dating someone, you work too much.”

“Chae,” You laugh, “you work more than I do,”

“Eh,” She waves you off, “maybe, but I still have a social life.”

“Are you dating someone?” You turn towards her in your desk chair, leaning back and enjoying the quick break to talk about something that isn’t work or a looming deadline.

“Casually,” she shrugs, “and I have a date tonight.”

“Ah!” You exclaim, “Who is he?”

“Well,” Chae’s expression softens a little, and you can practically see how deeply the crush runs, “she’s a teacher actually, at SNU.”

You blanch a little at your mistake, “I didn’t mean to assume,”

Chae brushes you off, “It’s fine,”

“So,” You can still see the look in her eyes, “how long have you been seeing her?”

Chae seems to relax a little at your easy shift and says, “Three months,”

“How did you meet?” You ask.

“A bar,” She laughs, “but I’ve been seeing her every week or so since,”

“And tonight?”

“Dinner,” She says, “so I have to leave right at seven.”

“Ah, so that’s the reason for the new outfit,” You tease her.

You press her some more, both of you enjoying the break in the day. She tells you about the woman she’s dating, and you swap stories about your past relationships, details here and there to share. You work some more, you talk some more. Day by day working shoulder to shoulder with Chae you’re getting closer, the feeling of establishing yourself and your roots in Seoul evident now.

At seven, when it’s finally time for her to leave, she packs up quickly, “Are you staying later? Go home,”

“Just a little,” You shake your head, “I have just one more thing to get done,”

“Mhm,” She knows you're lying, but she seems too excited for her date to care properly.

“Have fun tonight,” You usher her off.

She’s a foot from the elevator before she stops and turns on her heel, running a hand through her short hair, “I look all right?”

“You look perfect,” You assure her, “very chic.”

“Okay,” She shrugs on her coat, pressing the button for the elevator.

“Don’t stay out too late,” You joke, “early day tomorrow.”

“Ugh,” She smiles as the elevator slides open, “don’t remind me.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” You say, starting to turn back to your keyboard.

“Team dinner, Wednesday!” She calls out, “Don’t forget!”

“Got it!” You wave, “Now go before you’re late!”

“Yeah, yeah,” You hear her as the doors start to slide shut and you can’t help but laugh at her sudden nervous energy. Team dinner again, and you can feel yourself slotting further into this group of friends.

Rubbing the exhaustion from your eyes, you focus back again, headphones on and chair pulled in close to your desk. Just one more hour, that’s all you need to finish this out. You know it.

It’s nearly ninety minutes later when you get the notification on your phone that the boys are home, and you’re shocked out of your focus at the sound of the text tone.

jagi where are you?? we brought dinner - San’s text reads.

on my way - i promise!! - You fire back quickly.

if you’re still at the office can you grab my charger before you come home? - Hongjoong’s message comes through.

on it - You reply.

hurry home, the chicken will get cold - Yeosang adds with a series of crying emojis.

You smile, grabbing Hongjoong’s charger from his desk quickly and hurrying towards the elevators - twenty minutes, i swear x

be safe x - San’s text reads, and you feel the flutter in your chest.

This time of night, now well after dark you can easily take public transit home and slip into the back entrance of the dorms without much issue. The streets would be too busy and night too dim for fans or fan sites to be poking around, and with a mask on and staying discreet if anyone saw you and realized you were there for them, you’d probably just seem like staff.

i’ll be home soon, and don’t eat all the sides - You send through before you hit the street, tucking your phone away so you can focus on getting there.

Twelve hours and you already miss their faces. Their warm touches and the way they make you laugh. You miss their stories, and the way they always seem to find the smallest and most genuine ways of caring for you. You know when you get home they’ll already have a place for you at the table, a plate ready and a stack of food far too large reserved just for you. You know when you get home, they’ll be waiting. ~next chapter will be posted sunday, october 16th at 10:00 AM ET

#into the aurora taglist

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honeyhotteoks · 3 years ago

Text

into the aurora - chapter twenty-one (ot8)

chapter twenty-one: can't stop now

chapter summary: the tension at the studio with hongjoong finally snaps

warnings: basically all smut, specific warnings for: oral sex (f receiving), fingering, rough sex/rough foreplay, public sex (kind of), implication of choking, extremely light spanking/impact play, pussy drunk hongjoong

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, smut

word count: 5.1K

(previous chapter) (next chapter) | AO3 | masterlist

You’re not sure exactly where it started, if it was just you wearing a skirt to work, the late hour, or just more evidence of how pent up you’ve all been with the busy schedules, but it hardly matters when you’re coming hard against his mouth on the studio couch.

Your hands are locked in his hair, body trembling as he moves to kiss your thighs and sweep his hand up and down your calf where you hang over the end of the couch.

The door is thankfully locked this time, a brief moment of genius on your part as he crowded you up against the door even though you know it’s nearly midnight and there’s not a soul left in the building. This time neither one of you knew how to stop, not a single half hearted attempt at saying you shouldn’t enough to keep him from you.

You let your hands drop after a moment and your eyes flutter open, nothing but the dark padded ceiling above you, and you think at least there’s one good thing about Hongjoong’s office.

“How was that?” He asks, kissing your thighs again and giving you a squeeze.

“Good,” You sigh, a dizzy smile on your lips, “this is really stupid, but that was really good,”

He chuckles against your skin and you feel him shrug, “You’re not wrong,”

“God,” You take a deep breath, pushing your hair back from your face but not trusting your body enough to sit up just quite yet, “you’re actually very good at that,”

“Yeah?” He asks, but you can feel in his tone that he knows it. Something in his demeanor shifted the minute he had you on your back, a little flicker of the man you used to watch on stage.

“Oh, shut up,” You swat at his hand where it creeps up over your hip.

“Hmm,” His hands push your skirt up higher so that now it’s fully rucked up and over your hips and you finally look down between your legs. He’s studying you, a little too closely and you fight the instinct to close your legs. “You have,” His finger runs down one side of your slit, just barely touching, “a perfect pussy,”

“Joong!” You blush hard, your hips shifting back and away from him.

He grins and looks up at you, sitting up a little higher so he can see you better and resting his arms on your splayed thighs, “I’m just being honest,”

“You’re just,” You flounder for the right words, letting your head drop back with a sigh, “I don’t know, you’re different when we’re messing around.”

“Different bad?” He asks, brow crinkling.

“No!” You sit up and reach for him, “No, you’re just so focused when you’re working. We don’t flirt or touch, and then all of a sudden look at us,”

“Ah,” He laughs, resting on his knees, still between your open legs though your skirt has fallen somewhat back into place and you feel a bit less exposed now. He slides his hands up your outer thighs and lets them rest on your hips, “Work is work, and this is this,”

“I can see that,” You smile down at him.

His hands tighten and the look on his face turns teasing, wolfish and plotting and you can practically hear him thinking, “So you’re saying you like me like this?”

“Hongjoong,” You nudge his shoulder, but he shifts closer.

“You do,” His hands sweep a line up and down your thighs again, “you like the way I make you feel,”

Heat is sparking again between you, and you want to say something but the words die in your throat when he dips forwards to kiss your chest, working his lips down to the top of your v-neck blouse until he’s squarely over your sternum. He sighs against your skin, his breath warm, and you shiver as he shifts his hands up your sides to pull the straps of your top down, letting the fabric drop down and pool around your waist.

“Joong,” You breathe, but he shakes his head, never once lifting his lips.

With careful delicacy, his kisses travel across your chest, and he peels the top of your bra down so there’s nothing in his path. His lips close around your nipple, and he sucks gingerly, holding you steady as your body jerks at the sudden sensation.

With ease he teases you, the flat of his tongue flicking your pebbled nipple again and again, and your legs widen so you can draw him even closer.

“y/n,” He tweaks your other nipple with his fingers, “darling,”

“Hmm?” Your eyes open to look down at him, the sudden pet name warming you.

“I need to make you come again,” He says, a little desperate edge in his voice, and his hand palms your breast a little harder, “right now,”

“H-Hongjoong,” You can feel him tense against you, like he’s ready to crawl inside your skin, and you shudder.

“Shh,” He shakes his head, pushing you back down on your back suddenly and dropping low again between your thighs, “I got you,”

His hand stays splayed wide over your stomach as he sinks his tongue into your already wet folds again, groaning as he does and pressing firmly as he flicks it over your clit. You clap a hand over your mouth to quiet the sudden moan on your lips and rock your hips against him.

“God,” He says as he lifts his mouth, “you taste so fucking good,”

A whine catches in your throat.

“Yeah, darling?” He teases, dragging his tongue from the bottom to the top of your slit, “Do you like when I talk to you?”

“Fuck,” His voice makes you shiver, and you open your mouth to respond but the sensation of his mouth attaching back to your clit makes your body jerk and you stifle another moan.

He groans against you, “I’m going to make you come on my tongue,” he murmurs, nipping at your thigh with his teeth, “and then on my fingers.” He drags his thumb over your clit, adding pressure when he drags it back again to flick it firmly and your eyes snap shut. “Then you can come on my cock,” he flicks your clit again.

“Joong, I swear to God,” You pant, your hips rocking to catch some more friction but he’s lifted his hand.

“Do you want it, darling?” He shifts forwards, lifting your legs to tilt your hips the way he wants you, settling the backs of your thighs on his shoulders.

“Touch me,” You plead, reaching for his hand.

“Touch you how?” He teases, blowing a cool stream of air across your cunt.

“Fuck,” You groan, dropping your hand to grip the cushions beneath you.

“Here?” You feel him press two fingers to your slit, using them to separate your lips, and you would be blushing about how he’s watching you, but it feels too good to care.

“Yes, there,” You nod, looking down and watching the way he smiles up at you from between your thighs.

“Right here?” He blows another cool stream of air over you, targeted on your clit now, watching as you jerk and rock under his hands. “Look at you,” he blows a little more air and smiles, twisting his head to the side to press a kiss to your thigh, “so desperate, aren’t you?”

Your mind spins, the teasing too much after you’ve already come.

“And so wet,” He adds, dragging a finger up through your folds just enough to gather evidence of your arousal on his fingers, “and soft,”

“Hongjoong,” You sigh.

“Fine,” He bites down softly on your inner thigh and you jerk under him at the change in sensation, “if that’s what you want,”

He sounds dismissive, bored even, but his tongue sinks into your folds and his arms wrap around you to anchor you positively immobile against his mouth. You squirm under him, whining and gripping down on the couch, holding on as best you can while he coaxes you open with his mouth.

You wouldn’t have ever guessed he would be quite so passionate or quite so dominant, but he devours you like you’re his favorite meal, and he groans into you every time you press your hips forwards onto his tongue.

“Ah,” You wince as he sucks hard on your clit, but the spike of pleasure that rockets up your body from your clit to your nipples makes you moan and your eyes snap open.

He shifts down, taking your sound to mean it was too much, and he’s not wrong. For a moment it was, but now you feel your clit throbbing and you need him to do it again.

“H-harder,” You pant, reaching for him and finding his hand over your belly, “do that again,”

He hesitates for just a second before he positions his lips and tongue over your swollen bud and sucks hard. The hot spike fires up your body again and you grip down on his hand, your nails digging into him.

“Really?” He chuckles against you, his words a little muffled, “let’s try that again, then,”

When he sucks again, a little harder and longer this time, you can’t stop the strangled noise that comes out of you and you clap your other hand over your mouth, “I’ll come,” you mumble through your fingers, “I’ll, fuck,”

“Perfect,” He sucks again, and suddenly his mouth is moving at a pace you can’t believe. It feels like his tongue is everywhere, and his hands are so tight on your body now you’re surely bruising, but you want it. You want him to leave his mark, suddenly and desperately, you want to feel him tomorrow.

He settles finally over your clit, and the cord inside you feels like there’s only a single thread left connecting either end together. He sucks harder, faster and more insistently. You know you're squirming under him but he doesn’t let you go, determined to draw you out.

He takes a sudden breath, before resuming his pace, and the shifting sensations combined with the sharp, almost painful pleasure is all it takes to pull you apart. The thread breaks suddenly, and you come hard once again, your legs vibrating with pleasure and your head back, body curled up in waves of sensation. You manage to stay quiet, your mouth open in a silent moan, but he knows anyways, no room to mistake the way your body is shaking.

You’re gasping, recovering your breath and thinking that you have a moment when he lifts his mouth, but he moves quicker than before. He drops your legs, shifting on the floor so that he’s at your side, and before you can ask what he’s doing, he has two fingers sunken deeply in your spasming cunt.

“Hongjoong!” Your eyes press closed tightly and you rock back onto the couch.

“Fuck, you feel good,” He sighs, pumping his fingers quickly, pressing in hard on every stroke in so that he can reach as deeply as he can.

The sudden shift has you caught in a haze, not given a second to come down from your orgasm and instead being held at a higher level of tension, drawing it out long like a rolling wave in a way you don’t know you’ve ever experienced.

You lean up just a bit, watching his hand as you spread your legs wider for him, but he presses you back down to the couch with a firm hand on your chest. You’re panting, breathy and shallow, and the way he holds you down leaves you nothing to do but let him take.

“M-more,” Your hand grips his sleeve.

He hums, pleased, and then leans over you just a bit more to better his angle, pumping into you firmly and flicking his fingers inside you at just the right spot to drag over your spongy g-spot over and over again.

The high tension and rolling wave takes you and you let it, pliant and shuddering under his hands. He watches your face with a stunned smile, cursing under his breath and holding you steady with the hand on your chest.

“Just like that,” He urges you, even though you’re deep in the middle of the dizzying orgasm, “fucking come just for me,”

“Joong!” You bite down hard, trying your best to keep quiet even though the soundproofing in the room takes care of most of that for you.

“God,” He presses his fingers in again, but keeps them in deep and drops his lips to your breastbone, pressing needy kisses along your skin, down your ribs, across the fluttering muscles of your abdomen, “I can feel you coming, beautiful,”

Your core is spasming around his fingers, muscles tightening and releasing with the waves of your orgasm, and you can barely think let alone respond. His fingers slip out finally, but he doesn’t lift up, his lips still dancing over your skin and his warm breath making you shiver.

His arm slips under your legs, supporting your awkward position slipping off the edge of the couch, just keeping you steady enough to let you recover.

When things do finally start to clear, you come back down to the feeling of his slow kisses, lips gently working their way across your skin. You blink your eyes back open and reach for him, finding his shoulder and letting your hand rest, “Joong, oh my god,”

He hums against your chest, “Yeah?”

“I don’t even know what’s going on,” You laugh, legs still feeling like jelly, “what did you do to me?”

“I’m not done,” He shakes his head, finally lifting up so he can press a kiss to your jaw.

“Yeah?” You sigh, “I don’t know if I can take any more,”

“Oh,” His voice drops a little, and you watch him shift at your side. He clears his throat softly and presses one more kiss to your skin before he nods, “That’s okay, we don’t have to do anything else,”

You bite down on your tongue to keep from laughing, the way you watched the spectrum of emotions pass over his face, but you keep going, “I’m just exhausted now,”

“Right,” He nods, easing your legs down to the floor and giving you a smile, even though you can see it’s a little half hearted, “that’s fine, we can go home as soon as you’re ready,”

“Hongjoong,” You watch as he runs a hand through his hair looking around him until he finds your underwear discarded to the side so he can pass them to you. You accept them and your face breaks into a smile but he’s still not looking at you.

“And then you know,” He says, rambling to himself now and trying to take his mind off how naked you are on the couch next to him, “we’ll do more another time,”

“Hongjoong,” You sit up, interrupting him a little more forcefully this time.

“Oh,” He turns, “what is it?”

“I’m messing with you,” You smile, “obviously.”

He’s completely still, processing your words.

“I’m messing with you,” You repeat and you watch a small smile bloom on his face, “and if you don’t let me fuck you, I might lose my mind.”

You expect him to scold, to laugh or to roll his eyes, but he surges forwards and pulls you closer towards him with a hand firmly on the back of your neck until your lips are locked back together. It’s unsteady though, and you tip forwards, bracing yourself on his shoulder.

“You’re so mean,” He nips at your lip and you twitch in his hands, “how are you still so mean after I made you come so much?”

“It’s funny,” You tease him, pushing him backwards until you’re tumbling down onto the studio floor.

“Funny,” He repeats, narrowing his eyes.

“Mhm,” You’re straddling his thighs, and you push away from him so that you can sit up over him and undo his pants, frantically pulling at the buttons and zippers, “god, why do you have to buy pants like this?” You groan, trying to get around yet another little decorative buckle that surely makes him look cool and fashionable but leaves you aching.

“Our stylist gives us a lot of the,”

“It’s not a real question,” You laugh, finally pushing his pants open and yanking them a little further so that they’re down his thighs. The hard line of his cock concealed by his boxers makes you hum softly, finally close to having him like you want him.

“y/n,” He starts to say, but his words fade when you pull his boxers down too, “oh fuck,”

You stroke him steadily, drawing him up and fully hard now, before you lift up and slide forwards. You glance up at his face quickly, seeing only hungry need in his expression, and then sink down to take him inside you in one fast stroke.

Hongjoong’s hands lock down on your thighs, gripping you tight as his head falls back, a cursing groan on his lips. You push your hips lower, making sure you have every inch inside, and then let yourself relish in the feeling of him.

“y/n,” He shudders, “you feel,” his voice trails off and his eyes blink back open to find yours.

“So do you,” You murmur.

“Move,” he sighs, “please,”

You start off slow, rolling your hips forwards and back to drag your clit along his hard pubic bone and give him the slightest bit of friction. If he could pleasure you, give to you so intensely, you could do the same for him. You clench your muscles, gripping his cock tight as you start to bounce and he swallows back a moan of his own.

“Feel good?” You anchor your hands on his chest for leverage, watching his face with rapt attention, searching for what makes him pant and curse.

“You know it’s perfect,” He groans, “god, darling,”

“Touch me,” You prompt him, needing his hands to do something more than just hold your hips, you want to feel him everywhere.

He blinks up and remembers himself, one hand remaining tight on your hip but the other traveling up your chest. You dip forwards just a bit more, and he palms each of your breasts as you continue to rock your hips, drawing him in and out of your tight core.

You moan as he cock passes over a sensitive spot over and over, and you collapse forwards just a little more to sink into the sensation. His hand travels up, slipping up your chest until his hand rests at the base of your throat. You gasp as his fingers tighten for just a moment, and his mouth drops open, watching the way your face responds to the sudden sensation of his hand on your neck.

“Mm,” Your eyes pressed closed as you ride him, focused on maintaining your pace for him, but your body is trembling and his hands roaming your body are making you dizzy, “Hongjoong,”

“Don’t stop,” He urges you, hands returning to your hips to help you.

“I need you to come,” You beg him, “please, please,”

“Fuck,” He curses and your eyes snap back open.

You watch the exact moment he decides to change the pace, a flicker of a smirk and he tugs you down, sliding his hand on your throat behind your neck and pulling you forward. You crash down, and you expect him to kiss you, but instead he just presses you into his chest. He wraps his arms around you, a vice grip to lock your body down against his.

“Joong,” You twist in his arms to try and see his face, but he’s holding you too tightly.

He hushes you, and you feel his legs move into a better position, “I told you I’d make you come on my cock,”

His words rush heat through your body, and with every sudden drive of his cock into your overstimulated body you can feel yourself rocketing back to where you were when he got you on your back on the couch in the first place.

“Ah!” You whine against him, “Yes, yes, Joong,”

His hand shifts, and you feel it descend suddenly onto your ass, a pleasantly harsh smack before he grips down on the plush skin and uses the position to hold you steady.

“My needy little darling,” He pants, never once breaking his pace.

The sting of your skin feels delicious, combined with the heady feeling of your oncoming orgasm, “Again, again,” you choke out with a whine.

His hand flexes, gripping your skin before he releases you and brings his hand down with another crack. You moan into his skin, biting down on your lip and feeling your body start to tremble again. “Is that just making you wetter?” He groans, “Fuck, it is, isn’t it?”

“Again,” You nod into his chest, the feeling of your body cresting once again.

“I want you to come,” He groans into your hair, “come on, baby,”

It only takes two more sharp spanks for you to come apart over him once again, and he pushes his hips up to thrust his cock deep inside you as you shake above him.

“I’m,” He groans and pumps twice more, coming fast into your spasming walls. He shudders under you, gripping you close and panting, another muttered curse on his lips. He holds you tight, his chest heaving under your cheek and his skin slick with sweat, and your body floats, disconnected and suddenly exhausted in the hazy afterglow.

When you finally ease back into your body, you decide that you’re starving. Lying on Hongjoong’s chest, with his arms still wrapped around your waist, you breathe easily, letting him hold you close with your cheek still nestled against his smooth chest. His legs have relaxed under you, and the thump of his heart has started to slow back to a normal rhythm.

Hongjoong slides his hand along your back, “Don’t fall asleep, darling,”

You shake your head just a little, “I won’t,”

“You sound very awake,” He teases.

“Hmm,” You sigh, turning your head just enough to press a kiss to his sternum.

“It’s late,” He murmurs, “we need to go,”

“I know,” You sigh, arching your back to stretch your exhausted muscles, before you push yourself up off his chest and look down at him, “but next time let’s do this at home, I’m starving, and I want to go to sleep,”

“I didn’t think you’d be more whiny after sex,” Hongjoong smirks, squeezing your thigh.

“Hey,” You slap his chest lightly, “you were the one who jumped me,”

“I know,” He nods, “that’s why I’ll cook you something when we get home,”

“You will not,” You roll your eyes, “I’ve only ever seen you order take out,”

“Okay,” He smiles, “then I’ll heat up leftovers for you,”

You grin, shaking your head and shifting off his body completely so you can get dressed again. “Mm,” You turn, catching his lips and drawing him back to you once he’s standing, “Will you put me to bed after?”

He laughs, smiling and his eyes bright, “How do you still want more?”

“I didn’t mean it like that,” You kiss him again, “I just like your hands on me,”

“Mhm,” He breaks your mouths apart, “we’ll see,”

You know he’s just teasing, you know that the night will end finally with him in your bed, you can see it all over his face. He watches you while you dress, eyes flicking over you hungrily even though he made you come four times as promised and just fucked you senseless.

You pull your hair up into a neat bun, and do your best to wipe away any traces of smudged makeup before presenting yourself fully cleaned up to Hongjoong, “How do I look?”

“Good,” He assures you, no longer flirtatious and laden with innuendo, “but you do look tired, I shouldn’t have kept you so late,”

“It’s alright,” You shake your head, “I wanted to,”

He steps close, pressing a warm kiss to your lips and squeezing your hand, “You have an earlier day than I do tomorrow, I should get you home,”

“I’m using to being up late with you,” You tell him, pulling your bag up onto your shoulder and shaking your head, “stop worrying,”

He nods, pulling the rest of his things together and tapping out a quick message on his phone. He pulls a beanie down over his mussed hair and takes a deep breath, before clicking open his office door and peeking out into the hall. “All clear,” he says when he sees the halls are empty, “let’s go home,”

You follow each other out with a good foot of distance between you, something you just know to do when walking next to any of them now regardless of the time or place. Anywhere outside the dorm you’re cautious, especially in the office where a rumor like this could really hurt all your careers.

One of their drivers waits downstairs, and when Hongjoong pulls open the back door of the SUV he smiles, “I’m so sorry to keep you out so late,” he apologizes with ease, “we were just in the middle of working on something,”

“It’s okay,” Their driver responds, “I just dropped a few of the other members home, it’s no problem.”

“Okay good,” Hongjoong offers his hand as you climb into the car and you take it to hoist yourself inside the large vehicle, using his hand as an anchor.

In the car, the warmth of the vehicle has you nodding off almost immediately, despite the short drive home. It isn’t until you feel the car slow a full stop and your seat belt unbuckle that you start to stir again.

“We’re home,” Hongjoong murmurs, “let’s go inside,”

You stretch and yawn, rolling your shoulders and picking up your things, “Sorry, I’m just so tired,”

“That’s alright,” He smiles, plucking your bag out of your hands and throwing it over his shoulder, “we’ll get you to bed soon,”

You nod, exhausted from the work day and your time with Hongjoong in the studio. You have to be up in just a few hours, and you probably shouldn’t stay up any more, but the minute you walk through the door and see Seonghwa, Mingi, and Yeosang stretched over the couches you perk up a bit.

“There she is!” Seonghwa grins as he catches sight of you, “I haven’t seen your face all day,”

You roll your eyes, but smile, “I missed you all too, hello,”

Hongjoong sets your bag by the sliding door to your room, and then passes back behind you, this time laying a warm hand on your lower back, “Will you stay up to eat?”

“Mhm,” You nod, “you don’t mind?”

He smiles, his face warm and kind, “I’m happy to,”

He pecks your cheek before moving towards the kitchen, and you can tell he’s not intentionally making eye contact with any of the boys, but you are, and they certainly noticed. You can’t help the frankly stupid smile on your face, and you’re sure there’s a light blush on your cheeks.

“Don’t you have an early morning?” Mingi’s brow furrows as he looks at you, “You look exhausted.”

“Mingi,” Seonghwa slaps his arm.

“Do I look that bad?” You sigh, smoothing your hands over your cheeks.

“I didn’t say you looked bad,” Mingi corrects, hauling himself to his feet and walking towards you, “but you look like you’re about to drop and you’re up in,” he checks the watch on his wrist, “four and a half, five hours?”

“I know,” You lean into his hands, “I swear, I’m going, I just need to eat,”

“Alright,” He ferries you towards the bar and pushes you onto a stool, “let’s go,”

“I’m going to start following you all around when you have early schedules,” You groan, yawning into your hand, “I’ll bug you until you go to sleep early,”

“You already do that,” Seonghwa smiles, “and I’m not complaining,”

Yeosang settles next to you and brushes his hand over your hair, “I’ll make sure you get up tomorrow,” he says with ease, “don’t worry,”

“I got it,” Your head lifts up when you hear Hongjoong’s voice, “I mean, I’ll be up early tomorrow, I’ll make sure she’s up,”

“We don’t have a schedule until eleven,” Mingi says, “right?”

“Yeah, but,” Hongjoong gestures and shrugs, turning back to fetch your food out of the microwave.

Mingi opens his mouth to say something else, but you interrupt him as you stifle another yawn, “Joong kept me out late, he can get me up early,”

“Exactly,” Hongjoong agrees, grabbing you a pair of chopsticks and heading back to the bar.

Yeosang opens his mouth to say something else, possibly to suggest that he wouldn’t mind waking you, but Seonghwa shakes his head and Yeosang keeps his mouth shut.

Hongjoong feeds you a plate piled with leftovers, and you eat quickly and without preamble, the boys disappearing one by one to bed with a kiss. Everyone else goes to bed, but not him. He leans on the opposite side of the bar watching you eat until he’s sure you’ve had your fill and then clears it away. By the time he turns back around you’re already half asleep in your hands.

He takes you to bed quietly, easing into your sheets beside you and offering an open arm. He’s touchy sometimes, but not like the others who cling onto you like you might disappear if they don’t have their hands on you in some way. Instead of yanking you into his arms, Hongjoong offers you a soft place to land. You scoot towards him, easing into his arms, and in seconds you drift.

In the morning he wakes you with peppered kisses across your cheeks and softly murmured words. He pushes you out of bed until your feet are on the floor, until you’re on your way to the shower despite how bleary you are. When you make it back to your room, now shocked awake by the cold water, you find him passed out back in your pillows. He looks younger like this, his face clear without any of the stress of leadership. With quiet movements, you get ready for your early workday, and before you leave you tuck him back into your bed. With a gentle tug, you pull his phone from his hand and plug it onto your charger. You know he’s just as exhausted as you, if not more, but he’s trying. In many little ways, you are taking care of each other.

You slip out of the apartment before the day gets going and into the early morning light of the city. Things finally feel right, solid and sure. Seoul feels like home, and so do they.

~next chapter will be posted on sunday, 10/30 at 10:00 AM ET

#into the aurora taglist

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honeyhotteoks · 3 years ago

Text

into the aurora - chapter twenty-two (ot8)

chapter twenty-two: something owed

chapter summary: everything with the boys has been going well, but just as you start to relax and feel like you're home, someone from your past appears.

warnings: please read the notice under the cut for a few specific content warnings that i want readers to be aware of. otherwise, warnings for soft sex, comfort sex, fingering, oral (f receiving), sleepy orgasms

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, smut

word count: 7.2K

(previous chapter) (next chapter) | AO3 | masterlist

special content warning: this chapter introduces an ex-boyfriend of reader's. i want to be clear, there is no physical abuse in the backstory, but he's definitely shitty and manipulative. specific content warnings for verbal abuse, threatening texts, revenge porn/threatening use of consensually taken nudes, an almost panic attack / discussions of anxiety. this is not the hinted at backstory up to this point or the source of reader's old injury. i hope this is clear as the story unfolds, but please don't worry that i'm going to feature a physically abusive backstory, i will not be. thank you all, safe reading. The first time you see his name light up on your phone, your stomach drops, but you’re at work and you’re focused on the task in front of you, so you silence it and move on. By the time the day ends, you have four missed calls from In Su, but no voicemails. When you don’t hear anything else from him for days, it starts to feel like maybe he just drunk called you or reached out by mistake and didn’t really mean to get in contact. That would have been preferred.

It happens almost a full week after the four missed calls, right when you start to stop worrying about it.

You’re at dinner with the boys, you and Seonghwa had just finished making a triple batch of ramen and gotten settled at the table with everyone when your phone dings and you freeze when you see the message.

Why haven’t you called me back?

You can barely breathe and as you reach for your phone to silence it, and it dings again twice in quick succession to alert you to two new messages.

I know you still have my number.

y/n?

You flip the phone over, silencing it as you do and trying to shift your attention back to the lively conversation. Yeosang taps your arm gently, “Who’s bothering you?”

“Ah, no one,” you shake your head, “not important.”

“Mm,” his eyes narrow as he assesses your words, and while he knows you’re probably lying or brushing it off, he lets it lie.

You rejoin the conversation just as Wooyoung groans, “I said I would do the dishes! Ramen nights I clean up, I know, I know,”

They are teasing him of course, mercilessly, and you raise an eyebrow, “Wooyoung? Cleaning up?”

He huffs at you, “Don’t you start!”

You stick your tongue out at him and give him a playful shove, “I’m kidding, you always help,”

“See!” He points at you and addresses the other members, “you heard it here!”

Yunho interrupts, “This is the best ramen you’ve ever made, Hwa,” He’s nearly face down in the bowl inhaling the noodles.

“It’s spicier than normal, I like it,” Jongho comments.

Seonghwa throws his arm over the back of your chair, “y/n added the extra red pepper,”

The table runs through compliments, but your phone starts ringing in earnest, vibrating against the table, and startling you. You flip the phone and see that it’s In Su calling, which didn’t necessarily surprise you, but it still makes you feel sick. You consider silencing it again, but instead you just stare at his number lighting up your phone, and watch it ring out, hitting your voicemail.

The boys are watching you carefully.

“In Su?” Yeosang asks.

“Mm,” you sigh and flip the phone back over.

“Who’s that?” Wooyoung asks from your other side.

“Ah just someone I’m not friends with anymore,” you say, “I don’t really want to talk to him.”

The phone starts ringing again, and you pick it up off the table, sliding your finger across the screen to accept the call. “Stop calling me, I don’t want to talk to you.” You don’t wait for him to respond, just click end call, and then slide the phone back down onto the table.

“A friend?” San questions after you have hung up.

“Ex,” you admit.

Mingi raises his head from his ramen and quirks his head to the side, “Ex-boyfriend?”

“Yes,” you sigh, “we didn’t end on great terms, and I haven’t talked to him in over a year, I have no idea what he wants.”

The table is quiet for a few moments, all eight of your current partners shifting uncomfortably at the idea of your ex-boyfriend. The phone buzzes again before you can say anything else, this time just two short vibrations for incoming text messages, and you glance down.

You’re not being very nice.

You owe me this.

Your jaw clenches at the words. Seonghwa murmurs from across the table, “He’s from your hometown?”

You nod.

“Maybe it’s important? If you want to go call him it’s okay,”

You shake your head, “No, no it’s not that,” you’re firm, “I really have nothing to say.”

You glance up from your phone and see Yunho’s gaze locked on you, his chopsticks set to the side. “What is it?” he asks.

“He’s not very nice,” you say simply, “so I don’t want to talk to him. Hopefully he’ll stop reaching out to me soon.”

“Not very nice.” Mingi quietly repeats.

“It’s nothing bad,” you wave your hands, “we only dated for a short time in college. He was more in love with me than I was with him, and when I ended it, he said some mean things. He wasn’t a very good boyfriend, and proved it when we broke up, but that’s really it.”

“But he keeps calling?” Yunho points out.

“All of a sudden,” you nod, “I haven’t heard anything from him in over a year otherwise.”

“I don’t like his texts,” Yeosang gestures to your phone, “the way he talks to you.”

You flip your phone over, “Yeo,”

“I’m sorry, it’s right on the table,” he gestures to it.

“It’s fine,” you turn to address the whole table, “it’s totally fine, I’m just not going to answer him, and he’ll get the picture.”

“Hmm,” Seonghwa hums, “I still don’t like it,”

You smile, “Just let it go for now, okay?” You tuck your phone into your back pocket and they agree, but as the dinner continues you feel your phone vibrate several more times in your pocket.

After dinner, while the boys clean up, you take the opportunity to slip into the living room and check your messages.

I saw Yu Jun. I know you moved to Seoul.

Heard you landed a fancy job.

Honestly, I just want to talk to you, stop ignoring me.

Fine, but you asked for this.

The last message flips your stomach. Below the string of unanswered text messages is a gallery of photos, photos you hadn’t seen or thought about in two years, photos you thought were deleted. You can feel your breathing coming quick. You flip through the photos to see which ones he included, and it’s the exact ones you were worried about. You suggestively pulling down the strap of your bra in one, you wearing nothing but a men’s dress shirt in another. At the shots of you in bed, nothing but a sheet strategically covering you, tears prick your eyes. “Fuck,” you breathe.

Ready to talk?

Without hesitation you press the call button next to In Su’s name. The boys are being loud, and some of them have made it into the living room. Yeosang gives you a sharp look when he realizes you’re on the phone, and you quickly leave the room to have this conversation without prying eyes from your boyfriends.

“Finally,” In Su’s voice comes through sharply, and the sound of his tone brings you right back to two years ago.

“What do you want?”

“I wanted to remind you of a few things,” he says simply.

You press your back up against the wall in the hallway by the staircase, “You told me those were gone,”

“I lied.”

“I can see that,” you manage, “I trusted you to delete those, In Su.”

“You left me, okay? I didn’t have to do anything for you.” His voice is cutting as always, and you wince.

“What do you want?”

“I’m applying for a job at KQ,” he says, “I’ve been trying to get hired but it’s been a lot of rejection letters. It’s definitely not my first option, but when I heard you were there and working with Edenary directly? I’m sure you can pull some strings.”

“What are you talking about?” You can hardly believe his words.

“I don’t know how you got the job,” he says, full of smug self-satisfaction, “I’m sure whoever you’re fucking put in a good word,”

“I did not fuck someone for this job,” you bite back, “and I can’t help you.”

“y/n, I honestly don’t care. But you’ll get my resume on the right desk and talk to whoever you need to talk to about getting me hired,” he sighs, “and if you had just picked up my phone calls, I wouldn’t have had to remind you about the pictures, but you chose to escalate this.”

“Are you threatening me?” Your stomach knots.

“Of course not,” he says immediately, “but you and I both know there’s no way a pretty girl like you keeps her job working with very important people in the industry if her nudes are all over the internet.”

“I trusted you,”

“I trusted you too,” he says, “every time you said, ‘I love you’ and you were lying. I’m sending you my resume tonight, make it happen.” The call ends with a click.

You drop the phone, and rake your hands through your hair, “Fuck,” you mutter to yourself.

There is no good way out of this. Either you’d sell him as a great employee to KQ and get him hired, meaning you’ll have to spend every day in his vicinity, or he’d ruin everything you’d built for yourself and the boys the past couple of months.

“Love,” Yeosang’s voice calls.

“Fuck,” you repeat, squeezing your eyes shut tightly before sighing and looking towards him.

Yeosang stands a few feet away, his calm demeanor almost making you more nervous than anything. Hongjoong and Mingi stand close as well, and while you can hear the rest of the boys farther off into the house, the three of them are here, quietly regarding you.

Mingi is the first to break the silence, “This In Su,” a look of disgust passes over his features, “you said he threatened you?”

“Kind of,” you scrub your hand across your face and through your hair, “he wants me to do a favor for him.”

“And the favor isn’t for free.” Yeosang surmises.

Hongjoong is the first to catch on, “y/n, what does he have?”

You look down, the shame burning a blush up your cheeks, “It’s so embarrassing,” you admit, “I acted like such a fool.”

Hongjoong reaches out a hand and you cross the length of the hall to reach them. Some of the others in view behind the three of them. “You can tell us,” he assures you.

It’s hard to find the words, so you pull your phone forwards and unlock it. You open In Su’s texts and pass the phone to Hongjoong, immediately looking at your slippered feet and holding yourself tightly. You hear Yeosang’s tight intake of breath and Mingi’s low curse and your eyes close at the reaction.

“What’s going on?” Yunho asks and you freeze, the blush deepening in your cheeks.

“She talked to In Su,” Hongjoong says simply.

“Oh,” Yunho, his voice is closer now and you’re sure that he’s moments away from seeing the pictures. You can’t bring yourself to look up, but you hear it when he makes a high surprised sound, “What the fuck?”

You can hear them gathering, and Jongho says, “Are those what I think they are?”

Hongjoong makes a terse noise, and you finally open your eyes, slowly looking up to meet their gazes. “I was very young, and very stupid,” you try to explain.

“None of that,” Yeosang says with finality, “it was consensual, wasn’t it?”

His words startle you and your eyes flick back down momentarily, “Yes,” you nod, “we were dating. It was something he thought would be fun, sexy. It was at the time but given how little I really knew him it was still stupid. I should have just said no.”

“How old were you?” Jongho asks, his jaw set hard in anger as he gestures to the phone.

“Nineteen, I think,” you can feel the blush burning and you shake your head, “I thought I loved him, and I wanted to make him happy, and when we broke up, he showed me that he had deleted them. I guess he had copies.”

“And now he’s threatening you?” San asks.

“Mm,” you nod, “he heard that I’m working at KQ. He wants a job,”

“That’s what he wants?” Jongho shakes his head, “I don’t get it,”

“He was never very diligent in school,” you explain, “we were both in the same courses, both wanted to work in the industry, but he spent more of his time chasing me around and partying than studying or working hard. He said he hasn’t been having any luck finding a job on his own, and that I owe him this for the breakup.”

“Absolutely not,” Yunho’s voice is murderous, “there’s no way you’re working with this guy.”

“I definitely don’t want to,” you agree.

“Has he ever done something like this before?” Seonghwa asks.

“Threaten me?” You laugh, “No, but after we broke up, he was hung up on me for a while. He followed me around campus a lot, sent me a lot of letters. Eventually it stopped, but it took my best friend at the time threatening him with the police.”

“He never,” Yunho shifts from foot to foot, clearing his throat, “he never hurt you, did he?”

“No! No, he never did anything but be clingy and it made me uncomfortable, but he never touched me,” you assure him.

“Okay,” Yeosang interrupts, “but his texts? Even the idea that he would try and hurt your career? He’s not safe for you to be around, to see.”

“Definitely not,” San agrees.

You sigh and shake your head, “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do except try and get him hired,”

“I say we kick this guy’s ass.” Wooyoung offers.

“Wooyoung, be serious!” Hongjoong scolds.

“I was being serious.” He grumbles.

His suggestion makes you smile, “While I love the idea of my eight boyfriends scaring the shit out of him,” you reach out and squeeze Wooyoung’s hand, “I don’t think any of you should get in trouble and cause attention. So, any non-violent suggestions?”

“This is extortion,” Yeosang says, “you should really go to the police.”

“I don’t know,”

“Tell him you’ll take his resume, the job process takes time. While that is happening, call the police.” Jongho says.

“Lead him on?” Seonghwa turns to Jongho, concern evident on his face.

“Is that safe?” Mingi asks.

“y/n is always with us,” Yeosang jumps in, nodding along with Jongho’s plan, “at least one of us. So, she promises to help, buys a little time, and before he can figure out he’s not getting a call back from KQ, the police can pick him up. I’m sure the photos can get deleted that way,”

“It could work,” Hongjoong nods.

You nod, taking your phone back from Hongjoong’s hands and slipping it into your pocket. “It’s not a bad idea.” You agree.

“It’s not your fault,” Jongho says clearly, “it’s obvious that you think it is, but this In Su betrayed your trust, and you didn’t do anything wrong.”

His arms are around you a moment later, and you relish in the crushing hug for a moment before you say, “It doesn’t change the fact that it was still stupid,”

Jongho shakes his head, “People in relationships do lots of different things on trust, expecting that their secrets or their actions will be kept private. Look at all of us.”

You break away from the hug, giving him a squeeze of thanks, but you can’t help but say, “I’m just disappointed in myself, in trusting someone like him,”

Seonghwa reaches for you and presses a kiss to your forehead, “Don’t be angry you loved someone, or that within the safety of a relationship you trusted someone. I’m sure I speak for everyone when I say this guy didn’t deserve your love, and that isn’t your fault.”

“Thank you,” you murmur.

“Text him back,” San suggests, “tell him you’ll take the resume in tomorrow, and then we’ll figure out the rest.”

You follow his lead and text In Su back, carefully laying out the plan that you’d take his resume in that week and recommend him for the job, he just had to be a little patient while the hiring manager assessed things. Tomorrow you’d contact the police and see what you could do to get In Su caught and the pictures resolved.

But that's tomorrow. Tonight, none of the boys seem like they want to leave you alone. You can feel their tense anger coming off them in waves at the thought that someone would do this to you, but it does nothing but make you feel more embarrassed. You’re curled in the corner of the sectional anxiously worrying the inside of your cheek and flicking through articles about revenge porn aimlessly when Wooyoung collapses down on the couch next to you and tucks close to your side.

“Woo,” you shake your head, “I’m really not in the mood.”

“For?” He raises an eyebrow at you.

“I don’t know,” you sigh.

“Give me that,” he plucks your phone out of your hands and clicks the lock to darken the screen, setting it on the table and catching your attention.

“Hey!”

“You’re doom scrolling,” he takes your jaw in one warm hand and turns your face to meet his eyes.

“Look,” you groan, “I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but I’m just trying to figure out if he’s even broken any laws. We don’t know for sure that the cops can help.”

“That’s true,” Wooyoung says, “but why don’t you let them tell us that instead of a bunch of posts on Reddit,”

Your mouth clamps shut, and you look away from him quickly, as tears well up in your eyes you realize all of the boys are still in the shared living space. They’ve all been aimlessly on their phones or watching TV, but clearly just waiting on alert for whatever you might need, too unsure of what to say. Of course, it’s Wooyoung who breaks the uncomfortable silence.

“Hey,” Wooyoung’s voice drops as he notices your sudden tears, “whoa, whoa, what’s this?” His hands reach for you, pulling you into his chest instantly.

Your breath comes in an a hitched sob and you shake your head into his chest, “This is really bad, Woo,”

“Shh,” he soothes you, running a strong hand up and down your back, “we don’t know anything yet.”

Wooyoung shifts on the couch, dragging you over a little to sit closer to him and you feel someone drop down on your other side and rest a warm hand on your bare thigh, softly dragging a comforting line with his thumb.

“I just thought this was over,” you sigh into his chest, tears still coming hot against his t-shirt.

“I know,” he murmurs.

“Come here, baby,” San says from your side, sliding closer to you and lifting your hips to tuck you in his lap. Here you’re cradled between them both, and with your head still buried in Wooyoung’s chest, San rubs a comforting hand up your back, shoulder to shoulder with his best friend.

“y/n,” Yunho’s voice breaks through and when you lift your eyes, you see him crouched in front of you, “what can we do?” His eyes are soft and tender, empathetic and aching to help.

You shake your head and sigh, sniffing back tears, “I don’t know,” you tell him honestly.

He nods and rests his palm on your knee, squeezing you softly. You straighten up in between Wooyoung and San and they let you move out of their grip, but tears bubble up again and Yunho reaches forwards to brush them away with his thumb. Launching yourself forwards, you wrap your arms around Yunho and drop your head against his neck, pressing your eyes tightly closed and holding back another sob.

“Hey,” he rocks back on his heels when you collide with him, but he steadies himself and holds you close, cupping your head with one and the other warmly on your back. Your legs wrap around him easily and he tucks you close, rocking you softly as he murmurs softly into your ear, “we’re not going to let anything happen to you, okay? Not a thing.”

“Yunho,” you sigh, “you can’t promise that.”

He shakes his head and makes a dismissive sound, “I can, and I am,”

You lean back from your tight grip on his neck and meet his eyes again. Even though it’s not really a promise he can make or keep, you don’t know what the police will be capable of doing or how In Su will react, you choose to believe him. He brushes the tears away and again and draws you in for a kiss, comforting and slow, before breaking your lips apart and pressing another to your forehead.

“Okay,” you sigh.

“Don’t be scared,” he murmurs.

“Yunho’s right,” San says from behind you, and you feel his warm hand rest on your neck, stroking your hair softly, “this man is nothing but a coward. He’s acting out of desperation.”

Before you can respond, Hongjoong’s voice breaks through the moment and your eyes snap up over Yunho’s shoulder when you hear him say, “What he’s doing is definitely illegal.”

Hongjoong and Jongho are seated together, eyes trained on the laptop in front of them and Jongho nods, “It’s blackmail, but it’s also considered a sex crime.”

“I didn’t think we recognized revenge porn,” you swipe at your eyes with the sleeve of your sweatshirt and slide back off Yunho’s lap, coming to rest on the floor between San’s open knees and letting Yunho shift around too before he takes your hand back in his.

“We don’t exactly,” Jongho clarifies, “but he isn’t just posting the pictures, he’s threatening you with them to get something. That’s just good old-fashioned blackmail, the nature of the leverage just makes the crime more severe.”

Your eyes widen, “Are you sure?”

“We’ve been reading,” Hongjoong points towards his laptop screen, “I think we have enough to go on to talk to the police.”

“His text messages,” Seonghwa pipes in, “they’re threatening, you have that in writing.”

“They are,” you nod, the tightness in your chest releasing ever so slightly.

“And he actually sent you the pictures,” Jongho notes, “he doesn’t just allude to them. We have proof what he’s doing is sex crime, not just a threat.”

“They really might be able to help?” You meet Jongho’s eyes.

“I hope so,” he nods, “but if they can’t we’ll figure it out.”

You exhale long, your nerves that have been knotting up since he started texting you at the dinner table leaving your hands shaky and your brain foggy. Mingi’s eyes flick over you and he’s up and out of the room. It takes you a minute to realize what he’s doing, what he’s sensing, but when he returns and crouches in front of you it all comes together.

He presses a cold glass of ice water into your hand, and you break away from Yunho’s grip to hold the glass between both hands and take a long gulp. The boys are watching carefully, Mingi nodding for you to take another sip, the shock of icy water to the brain helping ground you out of a potential anxiety attack. From his pocket he produces your anti-anxiety medication and uncaps it, dropping a single pill into his palm and passing it to you.

Yunho rubs your back softly as you down the pill and take a deep breath, letting it work for a moment. San’s hand is a little tighter on your shoulder, and you can feel all their eyes on you. Up to this point, Yunho and Mingi are the only two that know anything about your panic attacks or your medications, and while you know they won’t judge you or think differently, the last thing you want is to be treated like glass by everyone.

“Okay?” Mingi checks when your eyes open, tucking your pills away in his pocket.

“Yeah,” you give him a small smile, “you knew before I did,”

“You had that same look in your eyes,” he explains.

You watch as Yunho and Mingi share a quick, private look, and Mingi backs up to his previous spot on the couch, gesturing again for you to drink more of the cold water just to keep things in check.

“y/n,” Seonghwa’s soft voice comes from next to Wooyoung, “is there… is everything alright?”

Yunho turns towards Seonghwa, opening his mouth to respond but you rest your hand on his forearm to stop him and he nods, holding his tongue.

“I get panic attacks sometimes,” you manage, turning towards Seonghwa, “they’re anti-anxiety pills to help stop them. It doesn’t happen often at all; you don’t have to worry.” You try to preemptively answer their questions.

“Are you okay now?” he asks.

You nod, reaching out for him and squeezing his hand, “I’m good, I promise.”

Hongjoong clears his throat gently and you turn to look at him, “Is there something we should notice? Like Mingi did? For the future,”

You soften at that, the way Hongjoong has started to grow more tender towards you over these weeks of living with them and spending so much time in the studio. You shake your head, “No, I can usually take care of it myself,” you shift in your seat and feel Seonghwa’s thumb stroking over your knuckles, Wooyoung’s hand coming to rest on your shoulder, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

“That’s not something you have to tell anyone,” Wooyoung says from behind you, “don’t apologize.”

San is oddly quiet behind you, his hand still firmly planted on the back of your neck, and you want to twist around and see what he’s thinking but Yeosang leans forwards from his spot, “So, we have a plan?” he brings the conversation away from your anxiety directly and back to the problem at hand, and relief floods you.

“Mm,” you nod, “I’ll call and speak with an officer tomorrow if I can and see what they need me to do. Can you send me anything relevant you found in your research that I can reference on the phone?” You nod towards Jongho and Hongjoong.

“Got it,” Hongjoong nods, shifting his attention back to the task at hand.

After a beat of quiet you sigh, running your hands through your hair and admitting to the boys that what you really need is sleep and some time to yourself. But then even after several hours have passed, you’re still awake, staring at your ceiling and nervously checking your phone. Your brain flicks back to earlier, and the way San said little after Mingi gave you your medication. He kissed you goodnight, but you could practically feel him thinking.

You glance at the clock and the digital white numbers read two-fifteen. Your leg bounces restlessly against the mattress, your mind carding through the night again. You sit up straight and slip out of bed. Standing at your doorway, you decide not to think, and just go with what you’re feeling, what you need.

Quietly you creep across the lower level to San and Yunho’s room, easing open the door as softly as you can and shutting it behind you. Yunho’s thankfully dead asleep, and easily one of the heaviest sleepers imaginable. It takes a full minute to shake him awake sometimes, and with the way he’s laid out flat on his back with a hushed, steady snore, you’re sure he’s out like a light. Using the soft city light streaming in through the windows you make your way to San’s bed.

He's on his side facing you, arms gripping around a pillow and legs tangled up in the sheets. As quietly as you can, you ease down onto the open spot in bed and shift some of the covers out of his twisted position to cover you both, scooting close to him and running your hand down his arm.

He groans softly, shifting against his pillow.

“Sannie,” you whisper, tugging at the one in his arms gently.

His arms release it easily, and you drop it off the side of the bed and move into his arms. They lock around you instantly and he hugs you to his chest, hitching a leg up over your hip and dropping his head against yours. He grumbles softly, pleasantly, and you know he’s close to waking.

Prodding him softly you kiss his jaw and murmur again, “Choi… San…”

“Hmm?” he sighs

“Baby,” you kiss him again, “I can’t sleep.”

San’s eyes blink open at that, and he squints at you in the darkness for a moment before he comes fully into consciousness. He’s still a little bleary from being woken up, but he cups your cheek and leans back to get a good look at you, “What’s wrong?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” you whisper back.

“Nightmares?”

“No,” you shake your head and sigh, “I couldn’t fall asleep.”

“This whole time?” He glances over your shoulder for the time.

“Yeah,”

“Are you worried about tomorrow?” He asks.

“A little,” you admit, and he nods.

“We’ll be with you,” he kisses your forehead softly, “even if we’re not next to you, we’re there.”

You slip your hand into his and he interlaces your fingers. With a sigh you murmur, “Can I stay here tonight?”

“Mhm,” he brings the covers up over you a little further.

San watches you quietly in the low light, his thumb stroking your cheek. Finally, he sighs, “Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah,”

“Earlier… you said,” he looks concerned, his brows ever so slightly drawn together, “are you really okay, or is that just something you said?”

“I really am okay,” you soothe him.

He draws you up to his lips, kissing you soft, deepening it when he feels you responding. He leans away again, “I don’t want you to be scared for tomorrow,”

“It’s a scary thing,” The idea of filing a police report, showing strangers these pictures, leaving it in the hands of someone else to care and resolve, it all terrifies you.

He nods, swallowing hard and you watch him gather his thoughts, “I hate that someone’s hurting you like this,” he says simply.

“I know,” you whisper, tears prick at your eyes.

“I can’t stop thinking of the hundred different ways I would kill this guy with my bare hands if I had him for a single second,” he admits, and it connects why he’s been so quiet.

“Come here,” you shake your head, pulling him back to your mouth and shifting your position so that your leg is now hitched up over his, bringing you closer, “I don’t want you to think like that,”

“I just want to protect you,” he admits, kissing you again, his tender care coming off him in waves, “we all do,”

“I know,” you nod, “and you are,”

He opens his mouth to protest but you shake your head, interrupting him again with a kiss. You didn’t come to his bed for this, but the anxiety is melting away and here in his arms you feel incredibly held. His cock twitches beneath you, and you feel him hardening against your clothed mound where your hips are slotted together.

“I,” he shakes his head slightly and you know he’s about to move away when you interrupt him, catching his cheek in your hand.

“No, please, I need you,” you whisper, shifting your hips slightly to grind against him gently.

“Are you sure?” His eyes are full of concern, and you draw him closer.

“Please,” you nod, “I can’t think about this anymore tonight, I just want to feel better,”

San’s tongue darts out and wets his lips, his eyes drinking you in, and glances to Yunho, “We’re not exactly alone.”

“Oh,” you glance over, but Yunho’s still dead asleep.

“Can you be quiet?” Your head snaps back to him and you nod immediately. He smiles and you watch as he shuffles around under the covers to discard his underwear before reaching for yours.

“Eager,” you giggle softly, and he shushes you.

“Let me make you feel good,” he slides your underwear off and before you can blink, he’s sliding under the comforter completely.

You lift the edge to watch him as he maneuvers between your legs, knocking them open wide easing down between your thighs. He looks up to meet your gaze and smiles, pressing a single finger to his lips to keep you quiet before easing his mouth down over your clit.

You can’t help the soft hiss that leaves your lips at the sudden sensation, and he squeezes your hips in his warm hands to tell you to quiet down. You steal a glance at Yunho who’s shifted in his bed, arm up over his head and his blankets now around his hips, bare chest exposed. San runs his tongue up the length of your slit, darting against your swollen bud and teasing you relentlessly. The combination of San’s mouth on you and Yunho mere feet away sends a hot rush through your body, but you tear your eyes away.

Your head falls back as you focus on the feeling of San’s mouth on you, his fingers teasing your entrance and testing your wetness. When he sinks one finger inside you fully, knuckles pressing flush against your cunt, you clap a hand over your lips and squeeze your eyes shut.

He hums softly, feeling your hips jerk under his ministrations and adds a second finger, working you up quickly while he sucks sharply on your clit again. The sharp sensation has you arching, rocking your hips against his mouth and you keep one hand over your lips and one on your breast, kneading it softly the way you like.

When his mouth and fingers leave you suddenly you blink your eyes open looking down to watch as he surfaces from the covers and moves over you, lining up his cock with your entrance.

“What,” you start to say, but he shakes his head, dropping his hand over your mouth and thrusting inside you in one sharp motion. You moan against his hand, and San presses himself down hard into you, seating every inch in your tight channel, quickly looking over to ensure his roommate is still asleep.

You’re breathing heavily through your nose, and he starts to roll his hips quickly and quietly into you. He’s biting down on his own lip to keep from making a sound, and with every push of his warm cock inside you, you feel yourself buzzing, coming up to the rolling edge of pleasure.

He falters slightly when he reaches with his free hand to grab one of your wrists, softly tugging your hand between your bodies and nodding to you. You communicate with ease in the dark, everything so clear in his desperate expression. Sliding your fingers down your front you navigate them to your folds, and before you start to circle your clit you feel the place where you’re connected, your soft fingers catching against his slick cock as it moves in and out of you.

He lets out a startled groan and you smile against his hand, moving your fingers over your clit faster now. He grins down at you, shaking his head at your teasing. Yunho hasn’t so much as twitched in his sleep as far as you can tell, but you both know that if he wakes up now nothing could stop you both from finishing.

San’s mouth widens in pleased awe when he watches your brows knit together tightly, your free hand tight against the muscles of his back and the hand between your bodies picking up the pace to bring you crashing headlong into your orgasm. Your body locks up under him, and he nods as he watches you silently come as if he’s easing you along through it.

He pumps his hips faster, the bed making small creaks now, but he ignores it and drives down into you. A light sheen of sweat across his brow, a slight smile on his lips, his hands gripping you tight, and when he comes it’s with a snap of his hips to drive himself in as deep as possible and a choked breath on his lips before collapsing down over you.

It takes a minute for both your heads to clear, but when you come back to reality and he slips his softening cock out of you, you take one last glance at Yunho to confirm that he did stay asleep the whole time. You sigh, a little relieved and smile at San.

He cuddles you immediately, twining your slick bodies together and dragging the covers up over your shoulders. “Feeling better, baby?” He nuzzles your ear.

“So much,” you sigh, and it’s true. At least for tonight you can relax, slip into sleep with his arms around you, your problems still problems tomorrow but your head clear enough now to know that there’s nothing you can really do at three in the morning.

You don’t even remember dropping off into sleep, just San’s arms around you and his soothing words against your ear keeping you calm and at ease, but when you wake it’s sudden, to a broad, warm hand on your cheek. When your eyes snap open it’s morning and Yunho’s looking down at you, fully dressed and ready for his day.

You smile up at him, but you suddenly remember where you are, the night patching itself back together in your foggy morning brain and you pull the covers up to tuck under your arms and keep you somewhat decent. “Hey,” you murmur, blushing and glancing over at a still sleeping San.

“I have an early schedule,” he murmurs quietly to not wake San, “but I wanted to tell you good luck today. If you need anything, just call and I’ll figure out a way to step away,”

“You don’t have to do that,” you shake your head.

“I’m offering,” he stops you.

You nod, “Thank you, Yunho.”

He leans forward and kisses you softly, not an ounce of awkwardness in his actions or expression, and when he breaks away and steps back, he smiles, “I’ll see you tonight.”

You wave quietly, watching him go, and then curl back into San’s embrace, burrowing into his arms until you have to get up, until you have to start thinking about what you would say on the phone to the police.

It should have been easy, especially after all the research Hongjoong and Jongho did, all the evidence you feel is at your disposal. It takes time to get through to an officer, and time to get connected to one that even works cases like yours. When you finally do, the reality you worried about starts to form again in front of your eyes. The texts, while threatening in nature, do not contain a direct threat in writing. The photos were taken consensually, and he’s not breaking any law by having them in his possession. While your description of the phone call is an active threat against you, it was your word against his. The officer takes your name, copies of the evidence you had collected, and promises to look into things for you.

For a week you stall things, you juggling work and the boys juggling their schedules as you try to figure out a way out of this. You call the detective every other day just to see what can be done, and every other day he promises he is working on things, but it starts to feel like just that, a promise alone.

You’re in the coffee shop a block from the KQ offices when you see him again. Park In Su standing at the end of the bar with a smirk. Panic flutters in your stomach, and you feel your heartbeat pick up. You consider leaving right then, turning on your heel and walking back to your office at KQ, or better yet making it down the street a little further to the studio where you know at least some of the boys are arriving, but you find yourself frozen.

The last contact you had with In Su was a lie, a promise to get his resume on the right desk but given that a week had passed, you’re not surprised that he’s suspicious and changing tactics. The barista behind the counter clears his throat gently and gestures to you. You’re flustered, but you hand over the money for the coffee and apologize before stepping away from the counter. In Su’s eyes are fixed on you, and you see him collect his coffee from the end of the bar and step towards you.

Your stomach is churning.

His smirk turns into a genuine looking smile and your breath catches in your throat.

He calls your name.

Your phone rings, and you jump, fishing in your pockets for it.

Yeosang.

“Hello?” you answer as quickly as possible and watch In Su slow his steps to regard you carefully.

“Ah, y/n have you gotten to the studio yet?” Yeosang asks and you hear a car in the background.

“No, I was on my way,” you say.

“Where are you now? We could pick you up,” he replies.

“I’m…” your mouth is dry, and you steady your breathing, “I’m at the coffee house by work, I ran into a friend.”

“A friend?” Yeosang questions, the tension obvious in your voice.

“You know him,” you hint, nervous to say his name out loud.

“In Su,” Yeosang surmises immediately, and you hear Wooyoung in the background make a noise.

“Yes,”

“Are you alright?” His voice is serious now.

“At the moment,” you settle on.

“I’m coming,” Yeosang says firmly, “we’re close, stay put.”

“Don’t,” your eyes break from In Su when you realize what he’s suggesting.

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Yeosang says, his voice clipped, “just stay put.”

The call ends abruptly, and you swallow hard. Your name is called at the end of the coffee bar, and In Su smiles before picking up your cup and making his way across the café to meet you for the first time in over a year.

chapter 23 will be posted on tuesday, november 1st at 5:00 PM ET

#into the aurora taglist

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honeyhotteoks · 3 years ago

Text

into the aurora - chapter twenty-four (ot8)

chapter twenty-four: and to know you're safe

chapter summary: you finally come back home, but not everyone feels the same about the past few days and things need to be said

warnings: discussion of the incident with in su, light flashbacks but nothing new, relationship conflicts, possessive jongho, fingering, frantic make outs, possessive suggestive language, quickie (kind of?), general smutty goodness

pairings: ot8 x reader

genre: fluff, angst, romance, ateez ensemble x reader, polyamory, non-idol!reader, fem!reader, smut

word count: 7.3K

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You can’t help but work late. After weeks of being distracted and stressed, you have a backlist to get through before you really feel comfortable leaving for the day. With Hongjoong out of the office for the day, focused entirely on choreography and at the other studio, you haven’t had a chance to see any of them. Since your messages yesterday, you haven’t heard from any of them either, and part of you wants to keep it that way for a little while longer.

By the time you get up from your desk and start for the elevators, you’re feeling thoroughly exhausted, the past few days in particular taking it out of you. You organize a ride with one of their drivers and head back to the dorms, nearly falling asleep in the car on the way.

The dorms are fairly quiet when you finally make it home. Leaving your shoes by the door, you move into the space and head to your room, dropping off your bag and coat. They’re home, you can hear some of them and you know their schedules, but so far no one has noticed you coming in. You push your hair up and out of your face and take a deep breath.

The living room is empty, but you hear rustling in the kitchen and you head that way. Hongjoong is seated up at the island, headphones on and focused intensely on his laptop. San and Yeosang are in the kitchen fixing something to eat, but facing away from you.

Your voice is a little quieter than you want when you finally speak, “Hey,”

San jumps, dropping the little packet of spices he’s trying to open and he groans, “God, y/n, don’t do that,”

You smile, and watch as he recovers and realizes that you’re here. Yeosang leans against the counter and watches San rush forwards, yanking you into his arms and putting you in a crushing hug.

“Hi,” you murmur into his chest, wrapping your arms around him.

“You’re back,” he says simply, sighing.

“Mhm,” you nod, “I told you I would be,”

“Please don’t ever do that again,” he says softly, pulling you away just enough to lock his lips on yours.

When you break the kiss you shake your head, “It’s really okay,” you tell him, “but I’m sorry I scared you.”

He holds your gaze for a moment, looking you up and down, before he cups your cheeks in his hands and kisses you again. The sound of a barstool scraping against the floor breaks you apart and Hongjoong doesn’t so much as glance at you before he walks away, laptop under his arm and heading towards his room.

“He’s angry?” You surmise.

“He’s fine,” San shakes his head, his hands sliding down your arms.

A door slams sharply upstairs.

“He doesn’t sound fine,” You murmur.

“He was worried about you,” San explains, trying to pull your attention away from the upstairs landing, “but he’ll be fine, don’t be stressed about him, jagi,”

You swallow tightly and pull your eyes away, “Alright,”

Yeosang smooths a hand down your back as he approaches and he reaches for your arm, “How’s your wrist?”

“Mostly fine,” You tell him, rolling it to show him that it’s not a significant injury, “a little sore.”

“And Ji-Ah’s?” He asks, trying to keep things normal and relaxed, skilled at concealing his emotions.

“Good, it was just what I needed,” You lean into his arms, bringing them around your shoulders so he can hug you too.

He’s stiff for a moment, but with your cheek on his chest he starts to relax, rubbing a hand up and down your spine, “And you’re home now?”

“I’m home now,” You assure him.

The sound of another door upstairs startles you, and you hear fast, heavy footfalls descending the steps. “Is she home?” Mingi’s voice cuts through.

“Yeah,” San calls back, “in the kitchen,”

Yeosang lets you go, giving you one more soft smile.

Mingi skids into the room, “Hey,”

“Hey,” You smile, “You know I was always coming back, right? I just needed,”

“Space,” Mingi nods, cutting you off and waving your concern away, “I know, I just… you’re okay?”

“I’m okay, I promise,”

“You left your meds here,” He says, “I was worried,”

You launch yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his neck despite how much taller he is, and he yanks you up. You cuddle into his neck and sigh, “Thank you for worrying,” you murmur, “but I’m good, I didn’t need them last night,”

“Hey!” Wooyoung’s voice catches you off guard and Mingi gives your cheek a kiss before dropping you back to your feet.

You turn, Wooyoung and Yunho both crowding the kitchen too.

“You come back and you don’t even come say hi to me?” Wooyoung tackles you and you burst out laughing, caught in his arms as he presses kisses across the side of your face, “What is wrong with you?”

“Woo, ah!” You push him off, but he clings on, “Jung Wooyoung, will you please let me go,”

“Not likely,” He wraps himself around your back instead, keeping you solid against him and kissing your temple just once more, softer and much more sweet this time.

Yunho leans over the bar, his face more serious than you normally see, but he meets your eyes, “You haven’t seen him again, right?”

“No,” You shake your head.

“You’d tell us if you had?” He checks.

“Of course I would,” Your brow furrows, and you watch as he nods and looks down at his hands.

“Are you staying?” He asks simply.

“Of course I’m staying,” Your mouth drops, “Yunho, what are you talking about?”

Everyone’s suddenly still, the tension thick, and Yunho’s quiet and unreadable as he keeps his eyes downcast. Wooyoung drops his arms from around you, and when Seonghwa finally joins the room, you couldn’t be happier for someone to help adjust the tone.

“Hwa,” You smile, “hi,”

“Hi, jagi,” He cuts through the group easily, catching your cheek in his hand and dipping down to give you a warm kiss, “it’s good to have you home,”

“Last night was weird,” San comments.

“I know, it was for me too,” You pull back from Seonghwa just a bit so you can find San and lean against him, caught now between the two of them.

“I’ve gotten used to you here,” San kisses your temple, “it didn’t feel right with you gone,”

“I’m sorry,” You squeeze his hand.

“Are you?” Your head snaps up at Hongjoong’s voice. He’s at the edge of the group, hands gripping the back of a barstool next to Yunho, his jaw set firmly.

“Joong,” Your voice softens, trying to approach him softly since he’s clearly upset.

Seonghwa cuts in softly, “Hongjoong, don’t,”

“Don’t what?” He bites, “We’re allowed to be upset. She left.”

Your jaw locks, and you step out of San’s arms. His hand lingers on your forearm, a silent squeeze begging you to stay calm, but anger bubbles up inside you, “What did you just say?”

“Fuck,” Wooyoung sighs behind you, but you ignore him.

“You left,” Hongjoong repeats, “what’s unclear?”

“Needing space is not leaving you.” You try to keep your voice as even as you can, your nails digging into your palm, “This had nothing to do with you.”

He huffs, pushing back from the chair, ready to dismiss your words.

“Not everything has to do with you,” You press.

“We know,” Seonghwa attempts to diffuse the tension, running a hand down the back of your arm, but you shake him off.

“You do,” You nod towards him, “but Hongjoong, don’t talk to me like that.”

He swallows tightly, his jaw tight as he looks at you.

Anger curls tighter and you look to Yunho, “And of course I’m staying, what was that even about? I texted, I said I needed a night. If I can’t take a night of space for myself… I don’t know what to say.”

“Jagi,” San steps close, “come on, that’s not what he meant, we were just worried. That’s all it is.”

“Worried,” You shake your head.

“It’s not about you needing space,” Hongjoong finally says and you meet his eyes.

“Then what is it about?”

He sighs, “You put us at risk.”

A deep, shameful knife pushes into you. After all they had done to help, all the whispered words of soothing comfort, all the ways they tried to make you believe it was the nine of you against the problem. The way they made you believe you weren’t alone. Until suddenly you are again. Until it’s just you against the eight. Your stomach churns.

Wooyoung springs forwards immediately, and your thoughts snap out of their spiral, “Take that back.”

“Why?” Hongjoong doubles down, his face pink with frustration, “We were taking care of things, we were handling it, you were supposed to be with one of us or with a manager. You’re lucky no one saw Yeosang and Wooyoung, but if they had,” he shakes his head, “this all would have ended.”

“Don’t you think I know that?”

“And then you just left,” He keeps going, “how are we supposed to take care of anything or to make sure you’re safe if you just leave?”

“Is that what this is about?” Your eyes widen, “You needing to keep me safe? Hongjoong, I’m not a child,”

Yunho’s face softens and he shakes his head, “That’s not it at all,”

“Then what?” You sigh, exasperated.

San steps close behind you, sweeping his hands up and down your arms and Wooyoung draws closer on your other side. Yunho smiles, a little sadly, “This isn’t a normal relationship,” he explains, “we’re all very lucky no one saw, but that’s all it is, lucky. We’re not able to be with you in public, to be next to you like a normal partner would. We can’t cut in and help, we can’t tell some guy off, or even fucking walk you to work,”

“Yunho,” You murmur.

“We can’t come find you, or call hospitals looking for you when you don’t answer the phone,” He adds, “all we have is each other. I know you weren’t leaving like that, and I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it, and I shouldn’t have said it, it was wrong,”

You stay silent, frozen while you let him finish.

“But we were worried,” He says, glancing at Hongjoong, “and please don’t make light of that. Someone did hurt you, and if Wooyoung hadn’t been driving close to the office at that exact moment, there’s nothing we could have done.”

“Baby,” Your voice is softer now, the anger dissipating, “it’s not your job to protect me,”

“Yes,” Mingi interjects, “it is.”

“That’s just not true,” You shake your head, “you can’t keep me safe from everything, that’s just not how the world works. Things happen, life happens, there’s nothing you can do.”

“Don’t you feel the same way?” Seonghwa offers softly from your side, his voice still rational and even, “Don’t you want to make sure we’re all happy? Don’t you want to make sure we never get hurt at practice and are eating well? Is that any different?”

“It’s...” you flounder.

“It’s no different,” Yunho says.

San squeezes your arms in his warm hands and finally says, “There’s eight of us, and we all want to keep you safe and happy. There’s eight of us,” he repeats, “so you should be the safest girl in the country, but Yunho’s right, we can’t be there.”

The room is quiet, their words hanging in the air. There’s nothing to do now, but to be honest. You nod, and rest a hand over San’s before you address them all. “I understand,” You start and you watch Yunho’s shoulders relax, “and I’m so grateful to have you, all of you. When I say it’s not your job to protect me, I mean that. We protect each other, and we care for each other, but I’m so tired of feeling like I need that kind of protection.”

Hongjoong’s fists relax, his eyes flicking down and away from yours. A warm hand rests on the base of your neck and Seonghwa steps a little closer. They keep listening when you continue, “Seeing In Su again brought up a lot of old memories, painful feelings I thought I had put behind me. I understand that you want to help, and that you were worried, but I got overwhelmed. I was embarrassed, and upset, and angry at myself for being afraid, and even more angry that I couldn’t handle it myself.”

“y/n,” Yeosang’s voice is gentle.

“I just need you to understand that I didn’t mean to scare you, but you were all trying to help so much that I started to feel like I was drowning. I just needed some time,”

Yunho pushes up from the bar and crosses the short space to you, pulling you into his chest and exhaling heavily in your hair, “I didn’t know,” he murmurs, “I’m sorry,”

“I’m alright,” You assure him, “it’s okay,”

He holds you a little longer, before pulling back and taking a step back, a soft, sad smile on his lips. San slides close to you once again, and you know he wants to pull you into his arms, but instead he just offers you a hand and laces your fingers together.

“I apologize,” Hongjoong quietly says, “I,” he shakes his head, closing his mouth tightly.

“I’m sorry I didn’t message you back,” You offer, “I didn’t think about how it would feel for you, not knowing where I was after everything that happened.”

He nods, and you take a step towards him, but he closes the distance. San lets your hand go, and you wrap your arms around Hongjoong and tuck your head into his chest. “I’m really sorry,” He murmurs, “I can’t apologize enough,”

“Me too,” You assure him, “but it’s okay, we’re okay,”

“Mhm,” He nods against you.

You cling to each other for a moment, before someone quietly suggests you all sit down. You make your way into the living room as a group, and find yourself tugged back into San’s arms, settling onto his lap.

“I don’t mean to stress everyone out again,” Seonghwa finally sighs, “but are we concerned In Su will show up again?”

“Yes,” You admit, “but I don’t know that he will,”

San adjusts you on his lap and runs a warm hand over your thigh, “What should we do?”

“Nothing,” You tell them, “I think we have enough work to focus on.”

“I don’t mean to state the obvious,” Wooyoung says, “but he hurt you, and he would have hit you,”

“I know,”

“Sure, he would be stupid to come back,” he says, “but let’s say he is that stupid. What do you want to do?”

“I actually thought a lot about this,” You cuddle back into San’s arms, “and I talked it over with Ji-Ah,”

“And?” Seonghwa asks.

“I’m going to be a little extra cautious the next few weeks,” You explain, “I’ll sit out for the next few team dinners, and Ji-Ah said she wanted to stick close while we’re going back and forth between the offices, so I won’t be by myself. Otherwise, I’ll be more careful to stay with your managers and if I’m coming home late, I’ll make sure it’s with one of you.”

Hongjoong nods at each of your points, “That’s good, that’s really good.”

“I’m also going to, uh,” You don’t know why you’re a little embarrassed about this, but the rest of the sentence rushes out of you, “take a self defense class with her,”

San’s eyebrows raise high and he grins, “Jagi!”

“Don’t,” You shake your head, “I’m just taking one class and trying it out,”

“That’s really cool,” Mingi nods, “what kind?”

“I’m not sure, she just said boxing and self defense,” You offer.

“This is really, really good,” San encourages.

Yunho smiles from across the room, “It’s not just good, it’s smart,”

“I’m not sure if I’ll like it,” You hedge, “but after everything it’s worth a try.”

“I think it’s more than worth a try,” Seonghwa agrees.

After a beat you nod, “Well, that’s the plan anyways. So, Hongjoong,” he looks back up to meet your eyes, “I won’t be able to stay after tomorrow, or make it to dance practice.”

“That’s alright,” He smiles.

You feel like everything is still a little tense between you, the atmosphere of your first fight with the boys ebbing and flowing around you. You scan their faces, and then suddenly you realize, “Wait,” your brow furrows, “where’s Jongho?”

“Late schedule,” Seonghwa says.

“When is he getting back?”

“Ten or eleven, I think,” Hongjoong says, checking his watch, “but we can text him and let him know you’re home.”

“Ah,” You sigh, “I wanted to see him too, but god, I’m so tired,”

“Sleep early,” Seonghwa urges you, “he’ll be here tomorrow,”

“Hmm,” You sigh, rubbing your eyes. You push yourself out of San’s embrace and slide to sit between him and Seonghwa so you can see everyone more easily, “Are we- I mean, we’re okay now?”

“Are you?” Yunho asks.

You nod, “With us? Yes,”

“I think we’re just fine,” Seonghwa smooths his hand down your back and looks across everyone, “yeah?”

Everyone nods, or offers their agreement, and Hongjoong clears his throat, “I am sorry,”

“It’s okay,” You assure him.

He smiles gently and nods.

“You need some rest,” Yunho says, “I can tell,”

“Mm,” You nod, “I just feel like I’ve been on edge for over a week,”

Wooyoung scoots forward on his section of the couch, leaning his elbows on his knees and finding your eyes, “It’s alright now,”

Until now, you haven’t had a second to process the past week and what happened outside the cafe. You’ve been running on autopilot, your body tense and standing on the razorwire of fight or flight. He watches the way you’re processing, and pushes himself between you and San, gesturing for him to budge over so he can get close. He pulls you in, tucking you into his chest and wrapping his arms around you. As Wooyoung kneads your shoulders, you feel your body start to relax in his arms, little pockets of tension releasing. You exhale a shaky breath, the week of adrenaline and anxiety starting to finally fade.

“You have been stressed,” Wooyoung murmurs as he works his hands over you, “why didn’t you say anything?”

“I think we were all stressed,” You murmur into his chest.

He doesn’t respond, but he kisses your hair softly and sighs before keeping his hands kneading into your tense shoulders and back.

When you open your eyes, you can see Yeosang hovering a few feet away, watching you carefully with his jaw set tightly. Images of them flash in your brain, Yeosang with his body pressed up against In Su, Wooyoung’s stern and eerily calm voice as he delivered his instructions. The sound of them running for you.

“I don’t think I thanked you,” Your fingers grip Wooyoung’s shirt, “both of you.”

“You did,” Wooyoung corrects you.

“Not really,” You pull away from him so you can find his face, glancing between him and Yeosang, “you could have gotten in so much trouble. I can’t believe you did that for me,”

“I’d do it again,” Wooyoung says with ease. He cups your cheek, “no one puts their hands on you,”

“So would I,” Yeosang nods, “no question.”

“You won’t have to,” You promise them, “I won’t let it,”

“You won’t need us anyways,” Wooyoung smiles, bumping your chin with his thumb, “you’ll be able to kick anyone’s ass before we know it,”

“Shut up,” You roll your eyes.

“You can practice all your moves on me,” he grins, nudging your side.

“There’s literal no chance I would risk accidentally injuring any of you,” You laugh, “we have comeback and tour next year,”

“That’s the spirit,” San squeezes your knee and gives you a beaming smile.

“Boxer y/n,” Wooyoung gives you a cheeky look, “that’s going to be way hot,”

“I’m never hearing the end of this,” You laugh.

“Absolutely not,” Seonghwa agrees.

Minute by minute things keep relaxing, the tension almost fully falling away by the time they push you into bed. It’s obvious you were trying to wait for Jongho, but after the third time you nearly nod off on San’s shoulder, they stop listening to your sleepy protests.

Wooyoung brings you tea, and Mingi stays a little longer to get you to relax and to tuck you in, but in no time you’re alone and fighting sleep by yourself.

He doesn’t knock when he opens your door at eleven-thirty, he simply slides it open and steps inside quietly, closing it behind him. You’re drifting, phone falling out of your hands as you start to nod off, when the sound of your door shocks you awake.

“Oh!” You breathe, “Jongho,”

“Hey,” He sighs, “I didn’t mean to wake you,”

“You didn’t,”

He narrows his eyes, “Right,”

It’s awkward for a moment. You’ve cleared the air with everyone else but there’s still him, and you don’t know which side of the spectrum he falls on. The other boys couldn’t tell you either, Jongho keeping his opinions close to the vest.

“I’m glad you’re home,” You finally break the ice.

“I think I should be saying that,” He smiles, and a little piece of tension melts inside you.

You smile and nod, “Probably,”

“Well,” He swallows and glances away, “we can talk in the morning, I didn’t mean to wake you,”

“No, no, wait!” You push yourself fully up into a sitting position, one leg off the edge of the bed and reaching for him as you shake your head, “Don’t go, please,”

“y/n,” He sighs.

“Please,” You press him, “If you go now I won’t sleep anyways,”

It takes him a second of consideration, but he nods, his hand falling away from the door.

“Okay,” You breathe.

“How are you feeling?” He asks, moving into the room and taking a seat at your desk chair.

You realize immediately that no one’s asked you that yet. They’re obviously all concerned, checking on you and being attentive, but no one has really looked at you eye to eye and asked how you are.

“Oh,” You shift in the bed and get more comfortable, “I’m… I don’t know, I’m okay, I guess?”

His face softens and he clears his throat, standing back up and moving closer to the bed, “Can I sit?”

You nod immediately, “Please,”

He takes a spot on the edge of the bed, reaching out and resting a hand on top of your shin over the blankets. Giving you a gentle squeeze he says, “Are you?”

“I’m,” The word ‘fine’ flickers through your brain. Followed by ‘okay’ and ‘good’, and you open your mouth to say one of them but nothing comes out. You’re too focused on his incredibly earnest brown eyes and the way he doesn’t seem angry in the slightest.

He nods when you don’t come up with anything and smooths a hand up your leg, “It’s alright,”

“Yeah,”

“You’re home now,” He murmurs, his voice soothing and clear, “and after what happened yesterday, it’s okay if you’re not okay,”

“I know,” Your voice comes out a whisper, tight with emotion.

“When you left the studio,” He admits, “I almost followed you.”

You blink hard and refocus on his words, “You did?”

“Mm,” He nods, “Seonghwa stopped me, he said it would be better to call you and give you a minute like you asked.”

“Oh,”

“I was really worried about you walking to the office alone,” He admits, “I’m still worried about it,”

You drop your hand over his and give it a soft squeeze, “I told everyone else this earlier, but I’m going to be more cautious for a little while. Walking with you or your managers, or staying with Ji-Ah so I’m not alone,”

He nods, “Good, that’s good,”

“I’m sorry I scared you,” You murmur.

He shakes his head and turns his hand over so that he can hold yours properly, “Don’t be sorry,” he says, “I understand why you needed time,”

“You do?”

“Mm,” He nods, and you watch emotions flicker across his face, “y/n, someone had just assaulted you, however you needed to process that isn’t for us to say.”

“Assaulted,” You exhale sharply and slide your hand out of his, shaking your head, “it was barely that, I appreciate everyone’s concern but I don’t want to be dramatic about a few bruises,”

“Baby,” Jongho reaches for you slowly, his broad, warm hands coasting down your arms until he’s holding both of your hands again, “take a breath,”

“I’m fine,” You assure him, even though suddenly all you can think about is the way you held onto the back of Wooyoung’s shirt, clinging onto him while your body pumped with panicked adrenaline.

“Hey,” He smiles and dips his head to catch your eyes, “I’m not trying to upset you, that’s the last thing I want to do. I’m just saying I understand, and I know some of the guys were upset, but I’m not and I wanted you to know that,”

“Jongho,” Your stomach tightens.

“I won’t lie though,” He squeezes your hands, “I was worried about you, and the idea that someone would so much as breathe on you that you don’t want,” he shakes his head, eyes darting down to your hands.

“I am okay,” You murmur, “and I’m pretty sure Yeosang and Woo scared him so good he won’t be coming back,”

Jongho grins, “God, I wish I could have seen it,”

With a small laugh you sigh, “I never thought I’d see Yeosang like that,”

“Mm,” He smiles, “he protects his team, we all do,”

The nervous knots inside you start to finally release now that you’ve talked to all eight of them, and you can see that Jongho has more to say, but he’s keeping it to himself. He’s quiet for a moment, and then he pushes back the sleeve of your sweatshirt.

“Jongho,” You shake your head but he shushes you.

His thumb softly rubs across your bruised wrist, and he turns your hand over in his palm so he can gently prod the other side of your injury. It’s not bad, it truly does look worse than it is, but you can still see the distinct finger marks where In Su held you.

“And this?” He murmurs, “How is it feeling?”

“Better,” You assure him, rolling your wrist to show him you’re not just trying to make him feel better.

He hums a response and nods, “I know it’s not anyone’s fault, but I am sorry he even got the chance to touch you,”

You surge forward before you even really think it through, locking your lips to his and catching yourself on his shoulder so you don’t fall further forward. He makes a little noise of surprise, his hands immediately sliding to your waist to hold you steady. It takes a second for him to catch up, but when he does you feel the tension shift. Jongho leans into you, kissing you hard and taking over, his hands sweeping up your back.

“Come here,” You tug him forward by the dress shirt and shuffle back on the bed.

“Mm,” He shakes his head but follows your head anyway, “are you sure?”

“Of course I am,” You brush off his attempt at being patient or chivalrous and keep trying to get him closer.

He collapses down by your side, warm hands cupping your cheeks as he kisses you, and he chuckles as your hands start to work their way down his buttons. “What’s gotten into you?” He nips at your lip.

“I don’t know,” You just need him, it’s as simple as that.

“Okay,” He disconnects your bodies, sitting back up to shuck off his now open shirt, and he makes short work of tossing off his undershirt and kicking off his trousers, “now how about,”

He starts to say but you pounce on him again, and this time he doesn’t wait or hold back at all. His kisses are hot and needy, shifting fully away from the carefully controlled man you’ve grown to know so well and instead letting himself relax with you the minute he realizes you need him too.

“Take these off,” You tug at the edge of his boxers, rolling your hips into his to feel a little friction.

“Baby,” Jongho shakes his head, “slow down,”

His words pull you back and you slide back, “Sorry, I just,”

He shakes his head again, “Relax, don’t apologize, I just don’t think there’s any rush”

“Right,”

“Plus,” he smirks, “you’re still wearing all your clothes,”

“You should do something about that,” You smile, holding his gaze.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm,”

You watch his eyes darken, and he clears his throat lightly while he looks you over. Your eyes flick down and you can see him already hard, the telltale tenting of his boxers.

Jongho smiles, “Show me,”

Nervous bubbles burst inside you and you bite your lip, reaching for your leggings so you can push them off. Jongho just watches, eyes appraising as you strip your legs bare. You’re waiting for him to say something before you take more off, but he moves on you before you can.

He pushes your legs open wide, slotting himself above you and pressing a messy kiss to your lips, his hands suddenly everywhere. He drops a little lower and the hard line of his cock nestles against your core, just the thin fabric of your underwear and his boxers between you now.

“Mm, fuck,” You groan, “kiss me again,”

He tastes a little like mint, but it’s faint, like he chewed gum hours ago and he sighs against your lips when your hips jerk and you press your core closer to him. “This isn’t going slow,” He murmurs.

“Who said we have to go slow?” You sigh, “It might be our first time together, but it won’t be our last,”

“That’s a great point,” He grins, “a truly, fantastic point,”

“So, touch me then,” You roll your hips again and watch his eyes flutter shut, “please,”

“We’ll go slow later,” He says, still not moving the way you need him to.

“Anything you want,” You promise him, “anything. I just need you to touch me right now,”

“Alright, beautiful,” He smiles, “then I’ll take care of you,”

Your hips jerk and he smiles at your reaction, before pushing your sweatshirt up over your breasts and finally revealing the rest of your body to his hungry eyes. He groans, softly palming one breast, then the other, before dipping down and taking your nipple in his mouth.

“Oh,” You grip down on his shoulders, “yes, yes,”

He hums against your skin, rolling your nipple with his tongue and then picking up his pace to deliver firm, steady flicks. He rocks your body against his, grinding his rock hard cock against your core with every shift of your hips.

“Come here,” He murmurs, sliding off you slightly so that he can cup your heat with his hand, pushing the barrier of your panties to the side and dipping his fingers through your wet slit, finding your clit with relative ease and beginning to circle his fingers.

You moan softly, nodding in his arms.

“There?” He checks, dropping a kiss to your chest, “Is that right, baby?”

You reach down, pulling your underwear further to the side to give him better access and then slightly adjust the placement of his fingers. He’s still, letting you guide his movement, until your hand lifts away and he kisses your chest again. When he starts to massage you again, he’s directly over your clit and sparking pleasure up your body in the way exact what you need.

“Yes,” You nod, panting and encouraging, “just like that,”

“Mm,” He sighs, “I can’t wait to be inside you,”

“Jjong,” You gasp, returning your hands to his shoulders, “please,”

“I know,” he murmurs, adding a little pressure to his ministrations.

You moan, “I want you now,”

“Come first,” He coaxes you.

It’s been too long - days since you’ve had any genuine intimacy with any one of your partners and far, far too long of a wait to have Jongho on you, around you, or inside you. You shake your head against his lips, gripping his shoulders and clawing him up, “No, no, I want you,”

“Baby,�� He groans, but makes no move to change his plans.

You moan as his finger dips inside you, and you tug at him again, “Jongho,”

He moves quickly, sweeping his hands up your arms and lifting them away from him, pressing your wrists down to the mattress above you to keep your hands to yourself. At this press of his hand against your injured wrist you hiss and he feels you try to retract your hand.

He releases you immediately, “Fuck,” his eyes snap to yours, “I’m so sorry,”

“I’m good,” You shake your head, “seriously, don’t stop,”

He hesitates for a moment, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. You are fine, just a twinge of pain against your bruises that fades quickly, and he nods when he sees you reaching for him again.

“Alright,” He kisses you softly, reaching between your bodies to shuck off his boxers, “okay, come here,”

You sigh against his mouth, wrapping your arms around him again, “Please, yes,”

With slow movements he maneuvers your legs back to open you up wider, slowly descending so he can brush over your slit with the head of his cock. He teases you for a moment, dipping the head inside your tight channel and then pulling back, letting his cock rock up the length of your core and pleasantly nudge your clit.

You moan as he touches you, trying your best to let him do what he wants even though everything in your body is telling you to yank him down so you can feel every inch of him.

“So pretty,” He smiles, and this time when he pushes in, he doesn’t pull back.

You whine softly, canting your hips.

“So good,” He murmurs, pushing in a little more.

“Oh god,” You stammer, “more,”

Every press forward sinks his cock further and further inside, stretching you open and filling you exactly. You didn’t do much prep, and it had been several days since anyone’s touched you, so it feels sudden and a little hurried, but the initial burn melts away as he softly grinds his hips into yours. Your body starts to respond immediately, growing wetter and wetter with each subtle move of his body on yours.

“There we go,” He watches as your head falls back, letting yourself sink into the feeling.

You moan as he starts to rock his hips, dragging his cock out just enough that when he thrusts forwards it stirs a line of pleasure up your spine. You drop a hand over your eyes and push your damp hair back, refocusing on his body above you.

He stills inside you, collapsing down over your body and letting your legs fall open naturally to the sides. He brushes his fingers over your arm, down your wrist again, and studies your expression as you tremble under him, his hand cupping your jaw now. He swallows hard and strokes your cheek, “If someone ever touches you again,” he breathes, shaking his head, “I swear,”

“Don’t,” You shake your head, “don’t think about it,”

His hand drags down your neck, “Easier said than done,” he murmurs.

“Jongho,” You reach for him, hand on his cheek and drawing his eyes back to yours, “I’m right here, okay? Just stay here with me, I need you,”

He studies your face a little longer, and you feel the twitch of his cock inside you as his hips shift. He dips low, capturing your mouth again and taking his time, kissing you slowly like he might be inside you all night. You moan against his mouth, heat building back up inside you again as his tongue drags along yours, his fingers applying perfect pressure as they trace down your body once again.

When he drags his hips back and pushes his cock inside you again, deep and firm, you fall away from his mouth with a stammered cry.

He pulls your face back to his, leaning his forehead on yours as he starts to work his hips again. You can feel the needy desperation pouring off him, the way his breath catches as he feels your muscles fluttering around him. He kisses you again, “You’re ours,” he pants.

Your back arches, your mind spinning with his words, the adjustment in position pressing your clit to his pubic bone with every thrust forwards and you nod, moaning and pressing your eyes shut tight.

“Nobody touches you but us,” He groans, “nobody,”

“J-Jongho,” You grip down on his shoulders, “please,”

“Say it,” He begs suddenly, “tell me,”

“Fuck,” You manage, pleasure blooming up your body.

“You’re all ours,” He pants, fucking into you harder and harder with every thrust, “no matter what,”

Your nails dig into his back, your body tight and aching with waves of pleasure. With your face in his shoulder you choke back a whine and nod against his slick skin, “I’m all yours,”

“Fuck,” He groans, “say it again,”

“Yours,” You kiss his skin, and his hands grip down just a little harder, “I’m only for you,”

“God,” He gathers you close, kissing you again, “you feel so good,”

You can hear him, but you’re starting to lose yourself in the steady beat of his cock inside you and the way your body reacts on its own, twisting and jerking beneath him.

“Why the fuck did we wait so long,” His breath is hot on your cheek.

“Idiots,” You drag his mouth back to yours.

He groans, a little laugh on his lips as he kisses you back.

The bubble building again inside you threatens to burst, and you plant your feet on the mattress to get the purchase you need to start meeting every downward jut of his hips with yours, rolling your body up, perfecting the position so that you can feel the head of his cock stroking against your g-spot with every connection of your hips.

You grip down on him harder, the words spilling out of you, “I’m gonna come,”

“Fuck,” His hips stutter.

“No, no,” You shake your head against him, “stay just like that, please, fuck, I’ll come if you just,”

“Shh,” He sighs, “I got you,”

His hips resume the right pace, perfect and controlled, and you feel it gathering again inside you. You’re close, so incredibly close and all you need is just a little more, just a moment longer.

“Ah,” You pant, “ah, fuck,”

“Come,” He urges you, “come for me, baby,”

Your head rocks back in the pillows, your body close to release but you can’t quite touch it. You can feel how close he is too, keeping himself controlled with his jaw locked tight so he gets you there first. With sudden clarity you beg, “Tell me again,” you find his eyes, “t-tell me I’m yours,”

His eyes roll, mouth falling open at your words but he doesn’t stop, “You’re all ours, baby, just for us. You’re,” he groans and you feel him shudder, “you’re mine,”

You break under him, and you hold him close, fingers tight in his hair and body shaking beneath him. The minute he feels you fall apart, his pace changes, no longer steady and paced for your pleasure but needy and frantic for him. He rocks forwards, working his hips fast, amplifying your orgasm and pushing him closer and closer to his release.

He pulls out of you suddenly, and he holds himself up above you with one hand on the mattress by your head, his other hand leaving your hip so that he can finish himself off, pumping his slick cock into his fist. Your hand slips out of his hair, and you watch as he lets the head of his cock catch against your clit, holding steady here as he works himself.

The bump of him against your swollen, sensitive bud has you moaning again and you nod frantically, “Please, please come,”

“Ah, fuck,” He shudders, his hips shifting so that his cock drags over your clit and he releases hot across your belly.

His head hangs, and he braces himself over you, his chest heaving as he catches his breath. He doesn’t look up yet, but you feel his hand find your hip and give you a squeeze.

“Jjong,” You sigh, “baby,”

“Hmm?” He finally looks up, his eyes dragging over your body.

“Come down here,” You smile up at him.

He nods, “Let me,” he sighs, “I’ll get a towel,”

You nod against the pillows, and you watch him gather himself with a steadying exhale. He slides off you, finding his boxers on the floor and pulling them on, giving you a shy smile before quietly slipping out of your room. There’s nowhere to move, not with your body feeling boneless and sticky. You let your legs fall closed and you wait.

It only takes him a few moments, and when he gets back he’s equipped with a warm washcloth and a pack of wipes. He’s recovered a little, and he grins at you, climbing back into bed without hesitation and dropping the warm cloth over your stomach.

“That was,” You take the cloth from him, cleaning yourself up and blushing a little at the sudden familiarity between the two of you, “really, really good,”

He squeezes your thigh and passes you the pack of wipes when you reach for them, before he fluffs up your comforter and locates your discarded panties. You slide them back on and then push your sweatshirt down before falling back into the bedding and running your hands through your hair.

“You’re so beautiful,” Jongho smiles, easing down next to you and propping his head up on his hand, “I must be insane for not kissing you sooner,”

“I kissed you though,” You tease him.

“Mm,” He nods, “true,”

You hold his gaze for a minute and then shake your head, “So, kiss me already,”

He brushes your hair back, cupping your face softly in his hands, looking down at you with a smile, “You want to be kissed?”

“Jongho,” You sigh.

“Cute,” He comments, and then he drops towards you, kissing you with such tenderness you think you might melt right here in his hands.

“We really should have done this sooner,” You murmur against his mouth.

“I’m sorry we waited,” He kisses across your cheek, “and I’m sorry it took In Su for me to do something about it,”

“Don’t be sorry,” You snuggle close to him, “you’re making me feel better,”

“Good,” he kisses your lips again, flicking your tongue with his, “if you give me ten minutes I’ll make you feel better again,”

Heat pools in your belly, and you don’t even remember being tired anymore. “Oh my god,” You murmur against him.

“We can take our time,” He smiles down at you, “we have a lot of catching up to do,”

“Mhm,” You drag him back down to your lips, “we really, really do,”

next chapter will be posted on sunday, november 13th

#into the aurora taglist

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