#obikin angst club

[sith-obikin]

OFF WE GO ❤️‍🔥

We are thrilled with the submissions and we’ll be posting them anonymously in batches in the upcoming days!

Here’s the first round of AO3 works, together with our heartfelt THANK YOU 🙏🏻

Little reminder for all the artists: don’t forget to tag us so we can promote your work here as well!

• (✦థ ｪ థ) by Anonymous (comic screenplay)

Reverse Master Padawan AU

Darth Vader is in need of an apprentice. His former Master and the Emperor pressuring him to raise a new generation of powerful Sith. 
But it's not only him that seeks Vader's attention. An initiate, a young student, asks him to become his teacher. 
Obi-Wan Kenobi has great potential. He is cunning, strong, fine swordsman and a very talented little boy. Most of Sith are very eager to snatch him, but Obi-Wan refuses them all because he wants Vader.

DW: Obi-Wan being a model student, basically your Ferus Olin from the Jedi Quest, but also very star-struck by Vader, who he adores. Bonus points if you can write the impending doom of apprentice killing their Master at the end as something both Vader and Kenobi contemplate. 
Bonus bonus points if you can make it sort of Obi-Wan trying to seduce Vader in hopes that if they'll sleep together, Vader would be more receptive to taking him as an aprentice.

• Even if I Fall, I'll Protect You by Anonymous (comic art)

Qui-Gon dies but Obi-Wan doesn't get to train Anakin, he is given to another Master. Years pass and without the help of taking care of his young charge Obi-Wan is not dealing well with his grief and emotions.

So when during a mission to investigate Kamino he is approached by his grandmaster Dooku, there isn't much holding him in the Jedi Order.

What Obi-Wan doesn't know is that young Anakin harboured a massive crush for him and now will do anything to bring his beloved Obi back to him.

DW: Anakin being obsessed over Obi-Wan, finding ways to seek him out and confront him, getting angry and jealous when Kenobi fights or flirts with other Jedi. Obi-Wan secretly trying to protect the boy from Sidious grand plan.

DNW: Infidelity. Obi-Wan or Anakin openly engaging in any sexual or romantic activity with someone else (past mentions of flings are fine).

• will you give in to me? by Anonymous

Sith Suitless Vader and Jedi Padawan Obi-Wan in a fuck or die situation. Padawan Obi is reluctant, Vader is impatient. Things get heated. Obi starts enjoying it too

DW: Smut, Bottom Obi, Top Ani, Non-Con Elements, Angst, bittersweet or happy ending,

DNW: Top Obi-Wan, Bottom Anakin, Scat or waterworks, bad or ending, Obi or Ani hating each other, anidala

• Look of Ruined Desperation by Anonymous

Emperor Obi-Wan loves to attend meetings in his office, with his dear husband warming his cock.

Don't want: rape/non-con, others participating in the obikin sex, open relationship, unhappy ending, unhappy relationship, watersport, scat, emeto, pet play, age play

• by the fires of the sun by Anonymous

Jedi Anakin (any era is fine!) is in the clubs of Coruscant looking for a no-strings-attached one night stand to take the edge off before he leaves for a mission that could take months. It's in the clubs that he meets "Ben" and it's lust at first sight.

For Obi-Wan, what started as him luring a Jedi into his bed in order to try and sneak information out of him, quickly turns into a obsession with Anakin and a need to make him his forever.

Bonus points for infidelity where Anakin is sneaking around behind Padmé's back by seeking a one night stand with someone else.

DW: NSFW (prefer top!Obi for this, but either dynamic is fine), dominant!Obi, Anakin being enamored enough that he ignores/misses a ton of red flags about Obi-Wan being a Sith

DNW: Obianidala, piss, scat, vomit, mpreg, heavy pet play, major character death

• you'll never know, dear by Anonymous

Yoda doesn't send Obi-Wan to deal with Vader on Mustafar.

Instead he sends someone else and they return with the news that Skywalker is dead. Obi-Wan is inconsolable.

It feels like the half of him has perished, his heart withered and died. His soul darkened.

He falls into a deep depression, before slowly starting to blame everything and everyone for the death of his beloved boy, the light of his life.

He iz convinced that had he gone to Mustafar, he could've talked Anakin back to the light. Which causes him to Fall in the end, driven by desire for revenge.

He starts haunting down Inquisitors and occasional Jedi who cross his path in his attempts to get to Sidious and kill him for what he did to his boy.

DW: Obi-Wan being extremely distraught, almost catatonic before he spirals. It's up to you whether Vader lives or indeed dies at the end.

DNW: Palpatine killing Obi-Wan.

• They won't know Mustafar by Anonymous

-Do you remember this moment, Vader? Just 9 days before your discovery.

-How to forget it Darth Ben

Obi-Wan and Anakin find two people identical to them, apparently they are from another galaxy.

• Disintegration by Anonymous

ROTS AU where Obi-Wan Falls instead of Anakin

• i've done dark things (in these shadows) by Anonymous

Obi-Wan as a Sith apprentice of Dooku and is Dooku's chosen heir but seeing as Dooku is just from a part from an external branch from the Bane line of Sith, his line of Sith Lordship isn't well liked or favored by either the wide known Sith Empire or Sidious himself (the current Sith emperor).

Because of this, Dooku cautions his apprentice to hide his talent so others will not know their plan to overthrow Palpatine, so they can usurp the throne and establish Obi-Wan as the new Emperor.

Palpatine's chosen is Anakin and the moment Anakin and Obi-Wan meet, Anakin knew he wanted Obi-Wan for himself, cue dangerous flirting game and Obi-Wan trying to navigate having both Anakin and Palpatine's attention on his back.

DW: Bottom Obi-Wan Kenobi, Top Anakin Skywalker, Kinks of all kinds, Gore, dead Dove, it doesn't matter, anything goes.

DNW: Top Obi-Wan Kenobi, Bottom Anakin Skywalker, Major Character Death (Only Anakin and Obi-Wan, if others, it's fine idc)

• I would burn the stars to protect you by Anonymous

Whump with sith Obi-Wan + jedi anakin.

They haven't known each other for long but actually long enough for them both to develop feelings to each other despite their differences. The context on how they meet is up to you. It can be because of a mission the council assigned to Anakin, but yeah you decide.

One day Anakin gets seriously injured by one of Lord Kenobi's inquisitors. Obi-Wan goes feral and fully in protective boyfriend mode (The guilty inquisitor is immediately killed of course).

DW: The more angsty and whumpie the better!, Blood loss injury

DNW: major character's death (it can be temporary tho), smut

• A song to keep us warm by Anonymous

Dyad AU.

Obi-Wan Kenobi was renounced by Qui-Gon Jinn after the battle on Naboo and had chosen to leave the Order.

Anakin gets to be Qui-Gon's new padawan instead.

Years later, Obi-Wan resurfaces again, on the battle of Geonosis, as a Sith Lord.

Shortly after that Anakin begins to have visions of him, the Force somehow connecting them and Anakin is forced to confront the man who might have been his older brother his friend but now turned his enemy.

DW: Sort of Reylo Force connection vibes, with Anakin being angry and guarded, while Obi-Wan is curious and calm. Maybe they slowly learning about each other.

DNW: Major Character Death, Unhappy Ending, Anidala (could be in passing but ultimately obikin is the soulmate endgame)

• i'll help you fall down with me by Anonymous

Rako Hardeen Arc (or a similar style mission), but rather than faking his death, Obi-Wan fakes a fall to the Dark Side for the mission. In his distress, Anakin falls (for real) and follows after his Master to find and rejoin with him.

DWs: Angst, Established relationship for obikin, Dubcon or noncon when Vaderkin finds out Obi-Wan was faking his fall

DNWs: piss, scat, vomit, mpreg, heavy pet play, major character death

• 'eat your young' by Anonymous

Sith Lord Kenobi and his acolyte Skywalker have a grueling training session.

DW: sexual tension, sweaty bodies, bloody sparring relationship might be established or not.

DNW: go crazy! no limits

[demon----dean]

what would you say are the biggest fandoms you've been in besides star wars?

Let's see -- I think I can count Tolkien as fandom, but it was before a lot of internet spaces became what they are, or I had such abundant online access, so I was a member of our local Tolkien club. For it, we had our own online forum and events. (Gasp, actually meeting other nerds in real life!) I went to my first larp through them, participated in seminars (I still have the notes to the one about the history of the Middle-Earth) and wrote my end of high school research paper about The vision of death and afterlife for Elves and Men in Middle-Earth at the third age.

Then I was going through a really shit time in life and stumbled upon Supernatural and I hyperfixated hard. :D I still stand by the fact that the first three seasons are amazing. It had all I could want -- complicated relationships, pretty damaged boys, urban legends with a twist, a car to drool over and an exceptional soundtrack of classic rock. I also started writing fanfiction, and we had a really great community on livejournal for a while. (It was super painful when the later seasons dropped the ball and eventually plain out sucked. 😥)

Then the MCU became a thing and hello, Tony Stark in that cave scene is just 👀👀👀

My first bigger ship in MCU was Stucky (Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes) and I loved all the angst and whump, delicious, I say. Eventually Thor came around and when I saw those pseudo brothers with a fucked up relationship and hurting each other, while loving each other so, I just had to have them as my blorbos. (Do you see a theme here? :D) So Thorki (Thor/Loki) became my main pairing for a good chunk of time.

Then I had some smaller fandoms and was too busy with real life until I rewatched Star Wars prequels and was like -- First of all: Surely Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan fucked at some point? Second of all: Has nobody else noticed this insane sexual tension and romance between Anakin and Obi-Wan??!! And to answer my questions I opened the internet and found out that there was indeed an entire Obikin fandom, and I've been here ever since.

Thank you for the ask! 🖤

[ao3feed-obikin]

So Comes Love

read it on the AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/42442644 by myideaofbeautiful "Obi-Wan could almost convince himself he had forgotten about Anakin. That is until he pulled into the driveway of his house at the end of the work day and spotted Anakin on the front lawn tinkering with his go-kart. There was a grease smear on his forehead and an intense line of concentration drawing his brows together. Obi-Wan stared so intently he almost drove through his own garage doors." Obi-Wan is an English Literature professor and enjoys the quiet sanctity of his life. Between teaching and Book Club meetings he doesn't see the need for anything more. That is until Anakin Skywalker and his mother moves into the house next door. Words: 8326, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: M/M Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker, Shmi Skywalker, Qui-Gon Jinn, Satine Kryze, Quinlan Vos, Darth Maul, Yoda (Star Wars), Mace Windu, Luminara Unduli Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Satine Kryze Additional Tags: Obikin Bingo, Bingo Event, Getting Together, Age Difference, Professor Obi-Wan Kenobi, Teenage Anakin Skywalker, Kissing, Angst, Frottage, Blow Jobs, Book Club, go-kart, Racing, Jealousy, Possessive Behavior, First Time read it on the AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/42442644

[icsek]

Chapter 8 has been posted after a long hiatus. Sorry guys!!!

[gffa]

Sometimes I cannot believe how much I appreciate the Obikin fandom and how much it’s spoiled me for giving me ridiculously charming fic, incredibly funny and hilarious fic, fic that breaks my heart, fic that heals my heart, fic that makes me want to gnaw on my own arm because I’m in awe of how amazing the authors are, how much a fic can smack my id straight on, how I can roll around in the fluff or wallow in the angst, how the fic runs the gamut of Obi-Wan and Anakin’s lifetimes, whether set during the Clone Wars or during the time of the Rebellion, whether it’s something nice or whether it’s Anakin being all Vadery and awful, there’s always someone writing something that makes me want to barf up rainbows for how good it is. So here’s a bunch of STAR WARS fics I think everyone should read because the fandom is amazing and there’s very few things I enjoy more than the feeling of being sated on a bunch of good fic. Or lots of quality banging. Or crying about these two idiots having terrible lives. Or just crying about feelings in general because you guys are amazing at punching me right in them. WHAT KIND OF FIC YOU’LL FIND HERE:

CANON-COMPLIANT (-ISH, WHATEVER) AT LEAST UP UNTIL THE GALAXY GOES PEAR-SHAPED

FUCK THE NOISE OUT OF ANAKIN SKYWALKER'S HEAD

DARTH ASSHOLE CAT SHOULD BE GRABBED BY THE SCRUFF OF THE NECK AND SCOLDED BACK TO THE LIGHT

FUCK YOU, CANON, THINGS GO A LITTLE NICER IN THIS UNIVERSE

WORLD IS HARD AND COLD, OBIKIN FLUFF IS SOFT AND WARM

MODERN AUS CAN BE FUN AND CHARMING AS HELL AND A GREAT CHANCE TO MAP CANON DYNAMICS ONTO A WORLD WHERE THEY CAN HAVE A HAPPIER LIFE, IT'S A WIN ALL THE WAY AROUND

WHAT DID CANON EVER DO BUT BREAK OUR HEARTS ANYWAY? TIME TO TELL CANON TO FUCK OFF AND WRITE AN AU

OBIKIN RECS - CANON-COMPLIANT (-ISH, WHATEVER) AT LEAST UP UNTIL THE GALAXY GOES PEAR-SHAPED: ✦ Lonely Hearts Club by izazov, obi-wan/anakin, nsfw, 7.4k    There are some things not even Chosen One can fix. Anakin learns this the hard way after a mission goes wrong. ✦ To be remembered by ToolMusicLover, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 16.3k    Various moments in Obi-Wan’s life, from his time as Anakin’s Master to the first nine years he spent on Tatooine. ✦ Out of the Bag by RagnarLothcat, obi-wan/anakin, nsfw, 8.1k    Obi-Wan has made his peace with his inappropriate feelings for his former Padawan. He knows there’s no room in their relationship for romance, and he’s used to denying himself for the greater good. He has everything under control: until Anakin comes back from a mission looking and acting a little different, and suddenly the relationship between Master and Padawan becomes a little fuzzy. ✦ every kind of love by loosingletters, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka & qui-gon & cast, 2.7k wip    Thousands of years pass and change is inevitable, even for the Jedi Order. Different groups break off, form new traditions, but in the end, they are all Jedi. And when the war comes, they fight for peace. ✦ of talks and romantic gestures by izazov, obi-wan/anakin, 3.8k    Obi-Wan just wanted to arrive back to Coruscant on time. Anakin had other ideas. ✦ nor the suns fall by treescape, obi-wan/anakin, 1.4k    “Hey,” Anakin says sharply—too sharply, he knows, and with a restless edge of fear. Obi-Wan’s eyes are blown so wide they’re hardly recognizable, barely a shadow of blue. They’re sliding closed again, the arc of his lashes too slow to be just a blink. Anakin takes a firm hold on his own voice, pitches it just keen enough to anchor beneath the blazing, barren sky. “Hey, stay with me, Obi-Wan.” ✦ wanting was enough by y0u_idjits, anakin/padme (& obi-wan/anakin), 1k    A reporter asks another question but she doesn’t listen, too busy noticing how Anakin’s smile goes softer, sweeter, as Obi-Wan answers, and she becomes aware that he has never once smiled at her like that. No, this is a smile reserved only for Obi-Wan Kenobi. The realisation burns her to her core. ✦ illicit affairs by Urgirl415, obi-wan/anakin (& anakin/padme), NSFW, 2.2k    Anakin needs something that Obi-Wan is more than willing to provide. Even if it means having his doorbell rung in the middle of the night. Or, Anakin cheats on Padme with Obi-Wan. Regularly. OBIKIN RECS - FUCK THE NOISE OUT OF ANAKIN SKYWALKER’S HEAD: ✦ Satellite Mind by intermundia, septemberist, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 19.3k    Five times Obi-Wan heard Anakin’s thoughts, and one time Anakin heard Obi-Wan’s. ✦ He’s Bringing Sweet Salvation by Is0lde, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, some d/s, 5.1k    Anakin has been naughty and learns a little about patience, consideration and what we deserve ✦ eat, sleep, wake (nothing but you) by decideophobia, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 6.7k    Obi-Wan twists his fingers inside him, pressing, pressing, and Anakin jolts with pleasure the exact same moment when an entirely different kind of noise rips through the room. A stomach growling. His stomach growling. Aggressively. ✦ Pretty Please by Gwendolyn (storiesofchaos), obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, 8.7k    And with Obi-Wan’s words, Obi-Wan’s mouth on sensitive skin, and the way his hand presses Anakin possessively against his body, it’s all too easy for Anakin to slip up again. All too easy for him to throw his head back as his eyes fall shut and moan out, “Daddy.” ✦ coming quietly undone by MisanthropyMuse, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 7.6k    “So, now’s later?” asks Anakin softly, one corner of his lips curling in amusement at the incoherent sentence that can only make sense for the two of them. “Force, yes,” responds Obi-Wan in a heavy sigh of relief, before raising his head and crashing his lips onto Anakin’s. ✦ hands-on by treescape, 3.6k    Anakin’s been driving Obi-Wan mad. Obi-Wan does something about it. ✦ One’s Craze by ToolMusicLover, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 17k    As Obi-Wan learns the extent of Anakin’s greatest desires perhaps he’ll also learn his own. ✦ turn softness to rage, then tears to rain by starwarsyndrome (I_write_fanfiction_sometimes), obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 5k    Anakin Skywalker is the force made flesh, and sometimes that tears him apart at the seams. Obi-Wan has always been able to hold him together. How he does it changes as the years do ✦ Be Mindful of Your Thoughts (And Words) by des_nuages_de_paris, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 7k    On a routine ship voyage across the stars, Anakin starts to get a bit bratty. Obi-wan decides to entertain him - and put him in his place. ✦ Baby Teeth by stardies, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, a/b/o, 8.2k wip    During a mission, Anakin runs out of suppressants. Obi-wan Kenobi is called in to tend to his former padawan. ✦ hang it off my shoulders by transkenobi, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 7.4k    Obi-Wan looks at him a moment, a frown flickering over his features but his eyes are unbearably soft. “I could leave. Or…” he swallows, averting his gaze for just a moment before he meets Anakin’s eyes again with a quiet resolution that Anakin recognizes all too well. “Dance with me.” Every irritated thought and rebuke comes to a halt and Anakin opens his mouth, brows knitting, completely thrown off. Of everything he’d been expecting Obi-Wan to say, it wasn’t that. What? “What?” ✦ a lesson learned is a lesson earned by RexIsMyCopilot, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, 4k    Anakin refuses to talk and Obi-Wan coaxes it out of him. OR Anakin learns a lesson and Obi-Wan learns one too. ✦ PARK THAT BIG MAC TRUCK RIGHT IN THIS LIL GARAGE by badut, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 4k    Anakin Skywalker loves dick, but he loves big dicks even more. Specifically Obi-Wan’s. This has now become a problem, but it all works out, eventually. ✦ touch of heaven with a wild side by demi_fae, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 1.3k    “That was one of the things we were able to figure out while you were…” Anakin gestured to Obi-Wan who nodded for him to continue. “You would have to ask Kix about the specifics, but it’s some sort of combination reproductive and defense feature, and at this point it’s basically orgasm or…” Obi-Wan choked back a laugh. “Or death?” He asked, expecting Anakin to laugh with him. The silence that met him told him more than anything Anakin could have possibly said. “Oh.” “Yeah.” ✦ Pretty Kitty by GayCheerios, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, 2.2k    “Master, you always take such good care of me,” Anakin says, a little chirp coming after his sentence, as his thumb rests on Anakin’s plump bottom lip. ✦ to seek something is to believe in its possibility by RexIsMyCopilot, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, 2.6k    Anakin teases Obi-Wan to get what he wants. Spoiler alert: it works. ✦ Punished Hole by WhyIsBubbleGumBlue, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, 1k    Anakin gets smacks on his bottom hole, and then they fuck. ✦ Taking Care by RagnarLothcat, obi-wan/anakin & quinlan, NSFW, 8.5k wip    A night out with Quinlan should be just the thing to help Obi-Wan relax after the outbreak of the war and all that entails. Anakin, as always, is there to make things difficult. OBIKIN RECS - DARTH ASSHOLE CAT SHOULD BE GRABBED BY THE SCRUFF OF THE NECK AND SCOLDED BACK TO THE LIGHT: ✦ flash point by treescape, obi-wan/vader, nsfw, 2.8k    After capturing Obi-Wan on Mustafar, Vader does the only thing he can think of to keep his former Master close: he freezes Obi-Wan in carbonite. Every so often, he can’t resist the temptation of seeing Obi-Wan again and brings him out. ✦ this too shall pass by Himboskywalker, obi-wan/vader & cast, NSFW, time loop, read the warnings, 5k wip    Anakin falls to the dark side and takes up the mantle of Darth Vader,butchers Jedi,betrays all he knows and loves, and he is left to burn on Mustafar by the man he once called master.Anakin becomes Darth Vader-and then he wakes up and lives it again-and then he wakes up and lives it again-and again-and again-and again. ✦ game plan by treescape, obi-wan/vader, NSFW, raised a sith!anakin, 11.2k    Or, Vader keeps capturing Obi-Wan during the Wars. Obi-Wan keeps escaping. It’s kind of a thing. ✦ Coming back and going forward by Enthusiastic_Enthusiast, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, read the warnings, d/s, 5.5k    Lord Vader has finally found a way to send his mind back in time. He is young and healthy again, and can’t wait to get his revenge on Obi-Wan, to make him pay for his betrayl, to push him down and make him pay. This time when the republic falls, Obi-Wan will witness it first hand, on his knees by Vaders side. The only problem? Vader isn’t the only one to return. ✦ Electric Love by thedeadparrot, obi-wan/vader, nsfw, 3.4k    Vader stepped forward, deeper into the cell, and reached out one hand. It pressed against Obi-Wan’s tunic, clean metal meeting dirty fabric. Vader’s suit only had the most rudimentary of sensors – he preferred to use the Force over his physical hands. But this was Obi-Wan Kenobi offered up for him, and nothing less than physical touch would do. OBIKIN RECS - FUCK YOU, CANON, THINGS GO A LITTLE NICER IN THIS UNIVERSE: ✦ After everything, only us by ToolMusicLover, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 9.2k    Eight years after the Clone War came to an end and Sidious was captured, Anakin and Obi-Wan spend an evening together. Distance and circumstance have separated them for too long, but on this night, Anakin ends up with more than he could have hoped for. ✦ After the Storm by Ripki, obi-wan/anakin & luke & leia, 7.3k    If asked a year ago where he would be in the future, Obi-Wan would never have imagined himself in the middle of nowhere, mending socks and discussing latrine maintenance. ✦ The strongest stars… by Tomicaleto, obi-wan/anakin & beru & cast, 7.4k    The war’s end seems to be close, with everyone looking forward to it. And when Anakin is doubting himself the most, an unexpected visit arrives at the Temple. ✦ Homestead by JSwander, whohatessand, obi-wan/anakin & luke & leia & cast, NSFW, 46.2k    After their failed altercation on Mustafar, Obi-Wan Kenobi secretly stows away with his former Padawan now turned Sith Lord and traitor to the Republic. ✦ O Trespass Sweetly Urged by Artemis_Unbound, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 8.6k    Anakin and Obi-Wan witness a sex ritual while on a mission. Obi-Wan doesn’t understand why Anakin is so scandalized by this, until Anakin admits that he’s never had sex. Obi-Wan…might need a minute to process that. ✦ climb like peas and beans by septemberist, obi-wan/anakin, trans!anakin, 4.9k wip    Anakin Skywalker is different in a way that he can’t quite name, until he can. Obi-Wan Kenobi never fails to see his apprentice for who he is. And everything changes. ✦ sun of my right hand by loosingletters, obi-wan/anakin & luke, 4.3k wip    What remains, keep it close. Holding the newborn he had carried from one end of the galaxy to the other, Obi-Wan Kenobi could not bring himself to give up the last member of his family. Instead of giving Luke to the Lars, Obi-Wan decided to raise Luke himself. OBIKIN RECS - WORLD IS HARD AND COLD, OBIKIN FLUFF IS SOFT AND WARM: ✦ Rotten Work by secretsolarsystem, obi-wan/anakin, 2.8k    Obi-Wan: I’ll take care of you. Anakin, with bloodshot eyes and a broken back from hours of terrible posture: It’s rotten work. Obi-Wan, who needs to bathe this man for his own sanity and health: Not to me. Not if it’s you. ✦ darkness shared, darkness halved by ahandsomebabe, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, 8.2k    Or: the one where Obi-Wan manipulates their force bond to give his partner multiple orgasms. ✦ Languages by Crowgirl, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 6.5k    So Anakin pulls out a map and makes a list. ✦ deception: epilogue by RexIsMyCopilot, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 6.2k    Anakin and Obi-Wan renew the physical part of their relationship after Rako Hardeen ✦ Levels of Sincerity {cahshee, ankai'a} by loosingletters, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka, 1k    In which Ahsoka Tano has the most embarrassing Masters in at least two languages. ✦ who a person truly is cannot be seen with the eye by RexIsMyCopilot, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, spanking, 3.6k    Anakin purposely avoids doing what Obi-Wan tells him to do. ✦ watch the time go by loosingletters, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka, a/b/o, 5.9k    Obi-Wan has scheduled pack-bonding time. Obi-Wan also has a lot of work to do, not that Anakin and Ahsoka care. Or, pack bonding with the disaster lineage in the middle of a galactic war. ✦ small gestures and grand vows by loosingletters, obi-wan/anakin & cast, 6k    Or, five times Obi-Wan and Anakin show how devoted they are to each other, and one time somebody demands proof and they are insulted. ✦ quiet the mind and the soul will speak by RexIsMyCopilot, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, 2.8k    “You look tired,” Obi-Wan observed, his hand on his chin, after a particularly long strategy meeting. He matched Anakin’s pace as they walked through the halls. “Yeah, well,” Anakin yawned. “Someone woke me up early this morning,” he teased in a quiet voice. OBIKIN RECS - MODERN AUS CAN BE FUN AND CHARMING AS HELL AND A GREAT CHANCE TO MAP CANON DYNAMICS ONTO A WORLD WHERE THEY CAN HAVE A HAPPIER LIFE, IT’S A WIN ALL THE WAY AROUND: ✦ Prompted - Chapter 18: Brotherhood by intermundia, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, modern au, 7.1k    Obi-Wan was already looking at the jail roster online when his phone rang. ✦ Prompted - Chapter 19: Hard Racing by intermundia, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, modern AU, F1 racing au, 6.5k    He wished he was back in his car, where everything made sense. His brain sometimes felt like a computer during a race, processing so much information in fractions of a second. He felt like he blended with the machine around him until he was just the operating system of the car, not a person at all. ✦ à la carte by RagnarLothcat, obi-wan/anakin & padme & ahsoka & quinlan & mace & satine & cast, NSFW, modern au, 55.6k    Anakin Skywalker is a perfectly normal grad student. He spends his days at the robotics lab, his evenings working at an upscale restaurant and his weekends on inadvisable hookups. That is, until Obi-Wan Kenobi saunters into his workplace and sweeps him off his feet. ✦ turn back now (i’m haunted) by tennessoui, obi-wan/anakin & cast, modern au, supernatural au, 41.7k wip    Anakin Skywalker’s house is haunted. Luckily for him, Padmé knows a ghost hunter. Unluckily for him, it’s the hottest, most english-professor ghost hunter he’s ever seen. And extremely unluckily for him, he’s starting to get the feeling he understands maybe ten percent of what’s actually going on here, not to mention what’s at stake. ✦ short shallow gasps by mysticmjolnir, obi-wan/anakin, d/s, 4.9k    Obi-Wan gets surprised by Anakin when he comes home from work. ✦ does he make you laugh? by y0u_idjits, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka, modern au, 3.6k    “Tell me it’s not about screwing the guy who’s screwing your husband.” “Ex-husband, and they’re not screwing,” Obi-Wan snipes at her. “And it’s not about that.” There’s a long pause. “Okay, it’s not all about that.” An Ocean’s Eleven AU ✦ recipe for disaster by tennessoui, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka, modern au, 9.8k    When Ahsoka tells Anakin she doesn’t want to learn piano anymore, Anakin is heartbroken. He doesn’t care about the instrument, obviously, but he’s practically in love with her teacher. Obi-Wan offers up a solution to their impending separation, and it’s not dating like any normal person would suggest. Instead, he’s gonna teach Anakin how to cook. Except Anakin’s a pretty well-known chef, and Obi-Wan is absolutely awful in the kitchen. ✦ cute guy, fast car, i’m all yours by wanderlove, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, modern au, 7.3k    In which Anakin saves a rich lawyer from a low-level Hutt enforcer and gets himself railed as a reward. ✦ For Me, It’s You by edge_of_night, obi-wan/anakin & shmi & qui-gon & cast, modern au, 15.8k wip    Obi-Wan knew one day he’d have to return home. As long as his father still lived, a piece of him would always be there. No matter how much he wanted to forget—he was raised there, he learned and grew, and spent his most formative years there. It’s also where he first fell in love. ✦ Morning delights by Tomicaleto, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 1.1k    Obi-Wan woke up to the smell of Anakin cooking breakfast and decided to help. He swears those were his only intentions. ✦ Flashing Lights by des_nuages_de_paris, obi-wan/anakin & padme & satine & mace & cast, NSFW, modern au, 26.6k wip    “Trust me.” Obi-wan turned to him. “It’s better than photoshopping it out. It gives him an edge. The scar, the hair, the brows…” He looked back over at Anakin, feeling his stomach flip. “It makes him look tough. Not enough male models can be pretty and tough.” “So I’m pretty?” Anakin grinned. ✦ i saw you and i knew by TheSopherfly, obi-wan/anakin & cody & rex, modern au, ballet au, 12.9k wip    Anakin and Obi-Wan are dance partners at a contemporary dance company. They try to keep things professional. (It doesn’t work.) OBIKIN RECS - WHAT DID CANON EVER DO BUT BREAK OUR HEARTS ANYWAY? TIME TO TELL CANON TO FUCK OFF AND WRITE AN AU: ✦ the ageless dark by maragny, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka & cody & rex & cast, NSFW, sith!obi-wan, sith!anakin, 25.6k    Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jedi Master and General of the Grand Army of the Republic, does not know what to make of his opponent, Separatist General and Sith Lord Darth Lessus…especially when he dreams of Lessus’ eyes, his smile, his voice saying Master, you’ve gone where I can’t follow. ✦ I only want you near me by Tomicaleto, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, dragon!obi-wan, 5.2k    Anakin tries to get used to having a dragon as a mate. Hunting days seem to be part of the routine. ✦ A Price Like No Other by loosingletters, obi-wan/anakin & cast, nsfw, a/b/o, raised a sith!anakin, 3.6k    Never found by the Jedi, Anakin Skywalker at fourteen was pretty, and valuable. He was worth slightly more than the average slave, could count his worth in peggats, truguts, wupiupi, and Republic credits; water, too, if need be, and there always was on Tatooine. And then the heat came. ✦ you love him dearly by shatou, obi-wan/anakin & cast, raised a sith!anakin, 2.3k    Anakin wakes up, panting, alone in the dark. Obi-Wan suggests meditation. ✦ tactile orders by treescape, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, senator!obi-wan, 3.2k    Anakin is assigned to accompany Senator Kenobi on a mission. They’re stuck on a ship together for four days. ✦ In Pursuit of Cold Water by JSwander, obi-wan/anakin & cast, NSFW, merman!anakin, 41.4k wip    Obi-Wan resolves to rescue a very stubborn merman from captivity and back to the ocean. ✦ et si les étoiles sont cachées by shatou, obi-wan/anakin & ahsoka, raised a sith!anakin, 2.8k    “Master, what were you thinking?” Ahsoka hisses, eyes darting from him to the closed door of his bedroom, from where the sound of Anakin’s pacing is obvious. Her hand is still clutching one of her lightsabers, alert. ✦ always and forever by obikinn, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, dragon!obi-wan, 2k    “I think you should fuck me while you’re a dragon, tonight.” -Anakin Skywalker, known monsterfucker ✦ Fine Pearls & Bad Leather by SingManyFaces, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, bodyguard au, 1.6k    Lord Kenobi spends the night in with the captain of his personal guard while abroad in the Lake Country. ✦ use my body to break your fall by tennessoui, obi-wan/anakin & padme & ahsoka & mace & yoda & rex & palpatine & cast, NSFW, sith!obi-wan, 63.5k    Obi-Wan Kenobi is too good at being a Sith Lord general of the Separatist army. The Jedi Council approaches Anakin with an offer he can’t refuse. These things are, actually, related. ✦ together again by Anonymous, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, a/b/o, sith!obi-wan, 2.8k    Anakin has been in hiding for months when his Alpha finally finds him.

[tennessoui]

Cannot believe you are gracing us with pb amnesia au! My crops are watered, my fields are flourishing, thank you. Cannot wait for the delicious angst and classic obikin misunderstandings. As always the humour is in Cody, who agrees with amnesiac Obi-Wan that Anakin is just some guy, nothing particularly special there, yes I'd like to see less of him too boss. But he's still got to babysit Anakin rather than getting rid of him like he wants to because what is Obi-Wan then remembers???

lol you know i feel like cody at first is like 'aah yes a dream come true. amazing. finally obi-wan sees anakin skywalker for what he is: just some guy'.

but then he sees anakin's teary murder expression from across the club because obi-wan is getting ready to sleep with some club goer, and cody puts his big boy pants on and guides him away and tells him that he really only sleeps with anakin these days, careful not to make it sound like an exclusive relationship (heaven forbid!)

obi-wan is absolutely confused because as a general rule of thumb he doesn't sleep with the same person twice, let alone exclusively.

cody frames it as 'from what you've told me boss' (closing his eyes and grimacing and deciding to skim off the top of the next two years earnings in reward for how brave and kind he's being) 'no one's as good as skywalker in bed and why settle for anything less than mind-blowing when you know where to find a stellar lay.'

and obi-wan is like 'well, idk.....'

and cody (closing his eyes again and thinking this really does just make him pure and selfless enough for a good afterlife) is like 'well if you don't want him again, i'll take a test drive, boss. you made it sound really very good.'

and obi-wan, who hates to share under any circumstances but especially with his brothers, forbids him from doing so and stalks over to anakin in order to take him up to his rooms for a night of what better be amazing sex.

(it is, if a lil intense.)

[kenobiapologist]

Let it be known that I am continuously in love with the content this fandom produces. There never ceases to be great Clone Wars era stories that delve into the details of my favorite platonic and romantic relationships. I’ve been trying to be better at keeping up with newer additions instead of resorting to the ones with highest kudos that I’ve already read a million times (just to make me feel something). 

Here are some that I’ve enjoyed today. They’re all obikin but I swear that’s not the only thing I read. I just was in a mood this morning, you know?

People should reblog/reply with some of their own recs too, because I’m always looking for tcw content. More details are under the cut.

To Be Human by OhLothCat (7k, ongoing, obikin slow burn)

Lonely Hearts Club by izazov (7.4k, ongoing, obikin friends with benefits)

After the Storm by Ripki (4.8k, ongoing, obikin that is mostly platonic at this point) 

To Be Human by OhLothCat (7k, ongoing, obikin slow burn)

In the wake of Satine’s death, Obi-Wan and Anakin are assigned a scounting mission for a new base on Dantooine’s moon. Complications arise and it leaves the two of them stranded. The tension between everything they’ve left unsaid is only heightened by being trapped on a deserted moon with no way of calling for help.

All of the dialogue in this story is perfect. I hear each character’s voice in my head so clearly. There’s some Obi-Wan angsting over all of the people he has lost (a necessary addition to any tcw story, let’s be real, he’s mister “infinite sadness”), conversations between Obi-Wan and Ahsoka that sate my hunger for more interaction between them, and the beginnings of a mission that is sure to bring Anakin and Obi-Wan much closer. I see vulnerability and mutual understanding in their future, which is sure to be cathartic as hell.

Lonely Hearts Club by izazov (7.4k, ongoing, obikin friends with benefits)

Told in the present and the past, we learn of an arrangement between Obi-Wan and Anakin that was supposed to allow them to fuck without feelings, but now Anakin’s gone and ruined it by falling in love. Set after the Deception arc, Obi-Wan and Anakin are learning how to work together again, despite the vestiges of mistrust Anakin still holds in his heart. Ten days after their mission goes horribly wrong, Anakin is sat at Obi-Wan’s bedside, begging him to wake from a coma. No one knows how to fix it.

The emotion, the anger, the tension that is both bad and so good between them. Just wow! The first chapter is only from Anakin’s perspective and you really feel like you get inside his head and understand all of the complex feelings he has for Obi-Wan. And it’s so sad? Fuck. The next chapter will be from Obi-Wan’s perspective, so I expect lots of pain and mutual pining. It’s going to be great.

After the Storm by Ripki (4.8k, ongoing, obikin that is mostly platonic at this point)

Anakin, Obi-Wan, and the twins are living in a ramshackle house on a rainy planet, far away from civilization and the amenities of the Core Worlds. Padme is gone, which has left a palpable hole in their family. Life goes on, kids need to be loved, and socks need to be mended.

Ripki stomps on my heart every time they write anything, but this fic is so visceral, it’s insane. I felt like I was there. I wanted it to be real. The inclusion of the details of repairing a house after a storm, raising young children, and continuing on despite the grief inside just smack you in the face. It’s so good. There hasn’t really been any romantic obikin at this point yet and that’s totally okay. I’m here for Obi-Wan making porridge for the twins and cleaning the mud off their cheeks after playing outside. And all four of them cuddled up under the covers in the morning?? Consider me dead.

[apawcalypsemeow]

Asking for the get to know you meme, what are your biggest ships other than Reylo? :D

Omg I had this all typed out and then I accidentally closed the wrong tag >

Thanks so much for the ask! That’s a bit of a loaded question for me because I think I define shipping a little differently than most people. To me shipping is “wow I really liked the dynamic and/or potential dynamic between these two characters, I’d like to see that dynamic explored more in fanworks/fanart/meta/etc.” Because of that I pretty much end up shipping everyone with everyone else. I have some ships I like romantically, others platonically, others antagonistically, some for the smut, some for the angst, some for the sheer crack, some I desperately want to see canon, and others I hope never become canon. And I’ll consume pretty much any type of fanwork for any of my ships regardless of if they align with my own preferences just because I love those characters’ interactions and love seeing them explored in new ways. 

So with that background in mind, here are a few of my favorite ships from a few of my favorite fandoms (in no particular order): 

Star Wars: Reylo (duh), Kylux (sweet antagonistic sinful smut), Reylux, Finnrey (platonic), Finnrose, Finnpoe, Finnreylo, Reyrose (platonic), Roselo/Kylose??? (platonic, seriously I need to see them being buddies, just think of the height difference…), pretty much any combination of the new sequel trilogy characters really lol, Asajj Ventress/Quinlan Vos (seriously why isn’t there more of these two??? Dark Disciple was so good and I need moreeeeee), Obikin (platonic), Obitine, Amileia, Kalluzeb (love, love, love! you may notice a human/non-human pattern in here), Kanera, Thranto, Spiritassassin, MAURA (the crack ship that I love more everyday), Reydar (crack)

Lord of the Rings/Silmarillion: Faramir/Eowyn (otp), Beren/Luthien, Legolas/Gimli (platonic soulmates), Beleg/Turin, Maedhros/Fingon (platonic and angsty af), Angbang (Tolkien rolls over in his grave and I hang my head in shame but I can’t help what trash I am)

Harry Potter: Scorose (seriously can you imagine these two getting married? like Ron and Draco just sitting across the room glaring at each other? just the thought of it makes me break out in giggles), Neville/Luna, Dramione (ok this one needs an explanation. I never shipped it when I read the book, the thought never even crossed my mind, but then I watched A Very Potter Musical and it was portrayed SO. DAMN. CUTE. and then I started thinking, “huh what if he did have this secret crush on her which goes against all the prejudices he was raised with?” and I fell down the rabbit hole from there. this is one of those ships I would never want to see be canon, but I love exploring it in fanworks nonetheless.)

Homestuck: Oh no, I’m not even opening this can of shipping worms… Let’s just say Meowrails, Signless /

Avatar the Last Airbender: Tokka, Korrasami

Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood: Royai, Almei (when they’re older), Armstrong/Sig (muscle bros!) 

Animorphs: Jake/Cassie

Hunger Games: Katniss/Peeta (is their ship name really what I think it could be…)

Miraculous Ladybug: Any combination of Adrien/Cat Noir and Marinette/Ladybug (seriously these two will be the death of me. it gives me anxiety watching them dance around each other not knowing that THEY ARE ALREADY IN LOVE. I know that’s the whole point but still asldkfjalskdjflskd)

Ouran High School Host Club: Haruhi/Tamaki, Honey/Mori (platonic)

I’m sure I’m forgetting a bunch that I really love. I seriously have an armada here…

I hope I haven’t offended/scared anyone off with my choices. I’m really quite a chill multishipper I promise!

Thanks again for the ask!!!

[sith-obikin]

FIRST BATCH OF AUTHOR REVEALS ❤️‍🔥

Time to start putting a name to these beautifully dark works!

Stay tuned to the next one soon! Reveals will be divided in three rounds, followed by a last compilation of everyone who is still submitting their works 🔥

• (✦థ ｪ థ) by bereweillschmidt

Reverse Master Padawan AU

Darth Vader is in need of an apprentice. His former Master and the Emperor pressuring him to raise a new generation of powerful Sith. 
But it's not only him that seeks Vader's attention. An initiate, a young student, asks him to become his teacher. 
Obi-Wan Kenobi has great potential. He is cunning, strong, fine swordsman and a very talented little boy. Most of Sith are very eager to snatch him, but Obi-Wan refuses them all because he wants Vader.

DW: Obi-Wan being a model student, basically your Ferus Olin from the Jedi Quest, but also very star-struck by Vader, who he adores. Bonus points if you can write the impending doom of apprentice killing their Master at the end as something both Vader and Kenobi contemplate. 
Bonus bonus points if you can make it sort of Obi-Wan trying to seduce Vader in hopes that if they'll sleep together, Vader would be more receptive to taking him as an aprentice.

• Even if I Fall, I'll Protect You by bereweillschmidt

Qui-Gon dies but Obi-Wan doesn't get to train Anakin, he is given to another Master. Years pass and without the help of taking care of his young charge Obi-Wan is not dealing well with his grief and emotions.

So when during a mission to investigate Kamino he is approached by his grandmaster Dooku, there isn't much holding him in the Jedi Order.

What Obi-Wan doesn't know is that young Anakin harboured a massive crush for him and now will do anything to bring his beloved Obi back to him.

DW: Anakin being obsessed over Obi-Wan, finding ways to seek him out and confront him, getting angry and jealous when Kenobi fights or flirts with other Jedi. Obi-Wan secretly trying to protect the boy from Sidious grand plan.

DNW: Infidelity. Obi-Wan or Anakin openly engaging in any sexual or romantic activity with someone else (past mentions of flings are fine).

• will you give in to me? by amadwinter

Sith Suitless Vader and Jedi Padawan Obi-Wan in a fuck or die situation. Padawan Obi is reluctant, Vader is impatient. Things get heated. Obi starts enjoying it too

DW: Smut, Bottom Obi, Top Ani, Non-Con Elements, Angst, bittersweet or happy ending,

DNW: Top Obi-Wan, Bottom Anakin, Scat or waterworks, bad or ending, Obi or Ani hating each other, anidala

• Look of Ruined Desperation by Fandommember

Emperor Obi-Wan loves to attend meetings in his office, with his dear husband warming his cock.

Don't want: rape/non-con, others participating in the obikin sex, open relationship, unhappy ending, unhappy relationship, watersport, scat, emeto, pet play, age play

• by the fires of the sun by butchgoth (GremlinGirl)

Jedi Anakin (any era is fine!) is in the clubs of Coruscant looking for a no-strings-attached one night stand to take the edge off before he leaves for a mission that could take months. It's in the clubs that he meets "Ben" and it's lust at first sight.

For Obi-Wan, what started as him luring a Jedi into his bed in order to try and sneak information out of him, quickly turns into a obsession with Anakin and a need to make him his forever.

Bonus points for infidelity where Anakin is sneaking around behind Padmé's back by seeking a one night stand with someone else.

DW: NSFW (prefer top!Obi for this, but either dynamic is fine), dominant!Obi, Anakin being enamored enough that he ignores/misses a ton of red flags about Obi-Wan being a Sith

DNW: Obianidala, piss, scat, vomit, mpreg, heavy pet play, major character death

• you'll never know, dear by amadwinter

Yoda doesn't send Obi-Wan to deal with Vader on Mustafar.

Instead he sends someone else and they return with the news that Skywalker is dead. Obi-Wan is inconsolable.

It feels like the half of him has perished, his heart withered and died. His soul darkened.

He falls into a deep depression, before slowly starting to blame everything and everyone for the death of his beloved boy, the light of his life.

He iz convinced that had he gone to Mustafar, he could've talked Anakin back to the light. Which causes him to Fall in the end, driven by desire for revenge.

He starts haunting down Inquisitors and occasional Jedi who cross his path in his attempts to get to Sidious and kill him for what he did to his boy.

DW: Obi-Wan being extremely distraught, almost catatonic before he spirals. It's up to you whether Vader lives or indeed dies at the end.

DNW: Palpatine killing Obi-Wan.

• They won't know Mustafar by Goodbye_there

-Do you remember this moment, Vader? Just 9 days before your discovery.

-How to forget it Darth Ben

Obi-Wan and Anakin find two people identical to them, apparently they are from another galaxy.

[icsek]

It doesn't always have to be life or death for Obi-Wan to get over his emotional constipation. Sometimes he just has to feel that it's a sacrifice worth making. Inspired by this post.

[icsek]

Just a drabble

Was thinking about TFU’s Force Repulse and Anakin Skwalker which turned into this little drabble. Loaded with angst just because.

Anakin hovered over the injured Obi-wan, using his body as a shield. He could hear the sounds of booted feet nearing their location, but he was too wrapped up in trying to repair the damage to his Master’s body to feel out who it was. All he knew was that he was Obi-Wan’s only chance of survival.

Suddenly he was pulled from his concentration by a hand pulling him away from Obi-Wan. There were words too but they were muffled and still in his ears. He snarled and pulled away from the grip only to see another person trying to take Obi-Wan from him.

“Get away from him!!” His rage bubbled up within him, the force winding around him as he called it to him with all his might. He tried to control it but it was drowning him, pulling him in every which way even as he felt Obi-Wan continue to fade. Another person grabbed him and he lost it, the force rapidly lashing outward from him and pushing everyone and everything away from him and Obi-Wan.

The immediate threat gone, he sank back to his knees next to his Master and once again begged the force to use him to heal the one person he couldn’t lose.

[icsek]

Sorry for the delay guys! Real life and that whole job thing completely knocked me off my schedule. I’ll hopefully get everything else posted this week as well!

Time was hard to keep track of without the Force, a chrono, a window, or a night cycle for the lights. Distantly, Anakin recognized that he was under constant surveillance, though he wasn’t quite sure why. Other than the migraines that continued to plague him, he was healthy and whole.

Visitors were few and far between, mostly Master Che or Master Luminara, though Yoda had paid him a visit a few times. When he asked about a comm unit or datapad, he’d been denied both under the order of not straining his head too much. At least the suppression collar had been removed, giving him some limited access to the Force.

Boredom had been a nemesis of his since he’d been a small boy on Tatooine and had only gotten worse as he grew older. Even when on leave, he kept himself busy with any number of little projects. There was something else he usually did when he was on planet too, but he couldn’t remember and forcing it caused migraines. He really must’ve hit his head and suffered some serious psychic backlash for there to be this many holes.

Loneliness was starting to get to him now too. He’d not been this alone in… Ever. On Tatooine he was always with someone. Once he became a padawan, Obi-Wan’s presence was always there in the background. As a Knight and General, he was always surrounded by a number of clones or personnel if he wasn’t with Obi-Wan or Ahsoka.

A pang of hurt rang through him, echoing through the void. Ahsoka. Master Luminara had told him what happened before, one of the things he’d forgotten. Anakin wasn’t sure what he had felt when it actually happened or what the specific events leading up to it were, but now he felt a sense of sorrowful pride for her. He was sad that she had decided to leave, yet proud that she had done what she felt to be the right path for her, even if it wasn’t the path he would’ve chosen. If anyone understood the struggle of wanting to stay because of duty and leave because of heart…

Fingers pressed against his temples as a wave of agony filled his head. He’d never wanted to leave the Order. He was happy as a Jedi. He wanted nothing more than to eventually have a seat on the Council and retire from the field to teach youngling classes. His thoughts were so confusing, his, but not his, there, but not there.

He took a deep breath and held it, working through one of the first meditation exercises Obi-Wan had taught him as a padawan. Slowly, the pain receded and his thoughts untangled as he sunk deeper into the Force. He let himself drift with the gentle current surrounding him, wrapping its tranquility around him like a cloak.

Seeing Anakin looking truly at peace in meditation took Obi-Wan’s breath away. Gone were the stress lines that had started to mar his young face in the past few years. Gone was the heavy weight that had been set on his shoulders far too early. He was beautiful, everything Obi-Wan believed he would be if he found that inner peace.

Originally, he’d come with the intention of confessing his feelings and attachm-, love , for the man, but now he second guessed his decision. Maybe the Council had been right about Anakin. Stripped of his attachments he would no longer be pulled between duty and his devotion, free to be a Jedi in truth. Without grasping for balance from someone else, he’d be forced to find it within himself.

Obi-Wan had already fucked it up one time, nearly costing Anakin his life. Would he really risk his life or sanity again over some feelings?

When Anakin slowly returned to the present from his meditation and smiled so freely as his eyes met Obi-Wan’s, he knew he couldn’t. This was Anakin’s second chance far more than his own, his chance to be the Jedi he always wanted to be, but struggled to achieve.

“Master! I’ve been worried about you. They said you were fine, but then they’ve been keeping me here so I feared the worst.” Anakin’s rambling had always been endearing, but now he saw it in an entirely different light.

“I’m quite all right, Anakin. How are you feeling? We were all rather worried about you.” He smiled and laid a hand on Anakin’s shoulder, ignoring the feelings that coursed through him at the touch.

Anakin huffed in annoyance, “Other than being utterly bored and isolated, I’m fine. The migraines only come if I try to push for missing memories too hard. Do you think they’ll let me go soon? Master Luminara is being very tight-lipped, even more than Master Che.”

Chuckling, Obi-Wan felt relieved that this mind block was holding successfully. “You know the healer types, Anakin. And neither of us have a very stellar reputation when it comes to staying put in medbay when given the option.” Those blue eyes held warmth and an openness he’d not seen since Anakin had been young. It had been his worst fear to come back in only to see those hideous yellow eyes boring into him.

“I distinctly remember that reputation coming from you, I have always been an impeccable patient.” The pouting expression on Anakin’s face didn’t quite match the twinkle of humor in his eyes.

Oh how good it felt to be teasing and joking so openly with him again. He’d missed this without even realizing it had ever left. “You aren’t going to win this one, Anakin. The Mind Healers can confirm that your memory is faulty. It’s always me who’s been the stellar patient.”

The door slid open behind them, Master Che stepping into the room. “The only thing I will confirm is that the both of you are terrible patients. It’s something that seems to be common in your lineage.” She looked at Obi-Wan giving a subtle nod of her head, “Now Obi-Wan is going to escort you to the gardens for some fresh air. No more than half an hour and if either of your heads start to hurt, return immediately.”

Anakin scrambled to his feet, his excitement and joy radiating off him in waves, “Freedom! Come on, Master!” He nearly bolted out of the door, prancing lightly on his bare feet in his enthusiasm.

Master Che fixed Obi-Wan with a knowing stare and grabbed him by his arm, “You know him the best, Master Kenobi. His Force senses are still dulled down, but it’s always up in the air with him. If he shows signs of anything, bring him right back here. Otherwise he could bring the entire Temple down if he wanted to.” A hypospray was discretely pressed into his hand which he promptly hid in his robes.

Nodding, Obi-Wan offered her a brief smile, “Of course, Master Che. There are several Masters staged along our route to the gardens just in case. I assure you, we’ll be quite alright.”

Anakin’s whining in the hall made him hurry out after him, “It’s not a race, Anakin,” he teased gently.

“You don’t understand, Obi-Wan. There’s absolutely nothing to do and they haven’t allowed me access to a comm unit or datapad. I’ve taken to meditating if only to pass the time quicker.” Anakin could still be such a child, even as a young man of twenty-four.

“I was rather impressed by your sudden proficiency with meditation, Force knows I’ve tried to teach it to you. But I’ll drop by some of your projects and your toolkit later today if they’ll let me.” The blinding smile he received in return affirmed his decision to let this be Anakin’s second chance.

Obi-Wan’s daily visits continued, much to Anakin’s delight. In his continued isolation, it was the only thing he had to look forward to each day. Usually, they would stay in his room and meditate together or work through their forms together. Sometimes, like the first day, they would go for a stroll around the Temple. He’d forgotten just how nice it was to spend time with his former Master without the pressure of missions, battles, or exhaustion.

Within a few days of Obi-Wan’s first visit, the suppression shields had been lowered on his room and the Force sang around him once again. He’d celebrated the complete return by using only the Force to put together one of the little droid projects Obi-Wan had dropped off. It was like being able to take a full breath again after drowning and reveled in it.

Today, Master Luminara had joined Obi-Wan in his visit and they had walked the Temple together in a relative, peaceful silence. When they had arrived to one of the atrium gardens, Anakin had promptly kicked off his shoes and dug his toes into the grass and dirt before flopping down and sighing in contentment.

A chuckle made him look up to where Obi-Wan was smiling at him fondly, “Already tired of walking, Anakin?”

“I miss the grass and the dirt of the gardens. It’s so alive with the living Force, I had taken it for granted when I was able to come and go as I pleased.” He sat up, brushing his fingers over the soft blades of grass.

Master Luminara gave him one of her half smiles, “Then you’ll be pleased to know that you’ve been released from the healers today,” she stopped him with a mildly scolding look as he opened his mouth, “on a few conditions. One, you’ve been released for duty into Obi-Wan’s care. You go nowhere without him, including around the Temple. Two, you will report to either myself or Master Che daily for routine checks.”

Anakin smiled teasingly at Obi-Wan, “Sounds like my first year as a padawan all over again.”

Rolling his eyes, Obi-Wan sighed, “I’m beginning to think I’m being punished for training you.”

“Awwwwe, Master, don’t be like that. You’re being rewarded by getting to be in my glorious presence all the time again.” He teased, feeling light-hearted and excited.

“Skywalker, please take this seriously. As far as we can tell you’re healed, but with the mind it’s never a sure fact. If you start to feel off or the migraines return, you need to tell one of us immediately.” She fixed him with a stern gaze, “If you don’t and another episode happens, you’ll be pulled from duty and grounded again.”

He had enough practice acting chastised and appropriately sorry from his teenage years to pull it off without a hitch, “Yes, Master Luminara.”

She bowed politely, a gesture Obi-Wan returned in full and he with a nod of his head. As soon as she left his sight, Anakin burst out in laughter and rolled in the grass. Finally, he was free, mostly. Though he never found his Master’s presence much of a burden. There were certainly much worse people to be around.

“Are you alright, Anakin?” Obi-Wan was looking at him slightly concerned.

Anakin grinned, “More than alright, Master. Far more than alright.”

[icsek]

This just keeps getting longer. I’m sorry guys! I’ve just had a bad week of writer’s block in addition to a crazy long week of work. Hoping this week will let me get a few of these smaller things knocked out.

A month later saw them back to the front lines with the combined might of the 501st and 212th. During that time, Obi-Wan catalogued all the minor differences he noticed in Anakin’s behavior. The most noticeable was his sleep quality, gone was the tossing and turning through the night with recurring nightmares. Instead, he slept quietly and peacefully, his Force presence a steady lull of calm.

Other little things stood out to him, Anakin joining Obi-Wan in meditation and actually sitting still through it, the increased frequency in his real smiles, and his increased patience with the Council. Anakin was more detached from his feelings, he deferred to other’s judgement, he didn’t spar with his teeth bared and the dogged determination to win every time, he no longer argued endlessly about the outdatedness of the Code.

It was everything Obi-Wan had ever wanted for him. Everything he knew Anakin could be as a Jedi. And yet, it wasn’t Anakin.

If any of the clones noticed a difference, he couldn’t tell. Admiral Yularen had only given a few odd stares when Anakin had asked for his advice in several battle plans, but never said a work about it to Obi-Wan. Not even Captain Rex had made a comment when Anakin didn’t insist on leading Gold Squadron himself during a skirmish with the Separatists.

Maybe it was only in Obi-Wan’s mind, these differences. Maybe it was Obi-Wan’s attachment to Anakin that made him miss the deep burning flame of passion that had drove Anakin before. Or, most likely, it was Obi-Wan still grieving for forfeited second chance.

Their first engagement in the field was difficult. Anakin had known that his bond with Obi-Wan was what had made them work so seamlessly together, but he didn’t realize just how much he’d relied on it. Instead of their normal perfect synchronization, they were one beat behind each other or one beat ahead. Even dropping their mental shields and broadcasting their thoughts to one another wasn’t enough.

The entire time, Anakin felt restless and unnerved. Each slash of his lightsaber had him wishing for Obi-Wan’s presence in his mind to reassure him like he had as a padawan. It distracted him, nagged him, until he was no longer able to focus on the battle and had to rely on unconscious movement directed by the Force. Every time he tried to focus on the present once more, the ache in his head started again and blurred his vision. He knew he should be withdrawing and retreating back behind their lines, but they needed the press forward that, currently, only he could provide. The battle started to pass in a blur, no longer truly aware of his surroundings or that he was slowly drifting further and further behind enemy lines.

He felt the flash of warning a moment too late to react. One minute he had been slicing through another super battle droid, the next, his lightsaber was knocked from his hand and he was flying through the air. The impact into wall knocked the breath from his chest and left him stunned as Count Dooku advanced. Anakin was unable to do anything other than brace for the inevitable downswing of the red lightsaber.

It never came.

He was confused for a moment before the stun bolt caught him in the chest. Anakin fought the darkness, but another quickly followed and could fight it no more.

Groaning, he woke up strung by his arms in a position that had become far too familiar. “Obi-Wan is gonna kill me.”

“Come now, Skywalker, no need to be so melodramatic.” Dooku’s smooth voice came somewhere from behind him.

“Says the master of dramatic flair.” He just can’t keep his mouth.

“It is a common theme in our lineage.” Dooku sounded vaguely amused, much to Anakin’s relief.

“While we’re on the subject of  lineage, you think you can let your great-grandpadawan go before your grandpadawan decides to murder him?” He gave a cheeky grin, probably pushing Dooku’s amusement too far, but it was what he did best.

“I could protect you from him if you decided to become my apprentice.” Dooku shifted to finally stand in Anakin’s field of vision.

“Your record with apprentices and padawans doesn’t fill me with hope, Dooku.”

Dooku chuckled, stroking his beard as he stared at Anakin, “Yes, well, yours isn’t all that impressive either. All those years just for her to leave you and the Order entirely. At least she had sense to get out before it was too late.”

The mention of Ahsoka leaving had both his head and heart hurting as his thoughts turned toward her. He couldn’t recall their farewell, couldn’t remember what she had said to him or what he had told her. Gritting his teeth, he shook his head, trying to clear his mind and not let Dooku get to him.

“Did I hit a nerve, young Skywalker?” He shifted back out of Anakin’s field of vision, “You always were too attached for your own good. Always struggling with attachment and letting go, to keep your emotions in check, to be a proper Jedi. As my apprentice, you wouldn’t have to worry about such things.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Dooku.” The pain in his head was only intensifying, whites spots starting to appear in his vision. He had never been attached, he didn’t struggle to let go, he had let go of friends time and time again. His emotions were washed from him by the force time and time again, as he’d been taught during his first year of training. “I am a good Jedi!” Wasn’t he? He followed everything the Council-

Pain completely blinded him, Anakin knew from experience there was nothing he could do except let this episode pass. Distantly, he could hear Dooku saying something but the words weren’t coherent in his head. A copper taste flooded his mouth and he briefly realized he’d bitten through his lip again before taste and thought fled him again. He tried to shunt the pain directly through him and into the Force, but it was hard to do without someone guiding him on the outside.

Time passed, he wasn’t sure how long, minutes, hours, days? It was impossible for him to tell. He’d passed out at some point he was sure. The cramping and aching of his joints meant he’d had another seizure during this episode. The smell and taste of vomit lingered in his mouth and nose making his desperately wish for the fresher. Pain persisted in his temples, but it no longer overwhelmed all his senses.

“Good, you’re awake now.” Dooku was sitting directly in front of him in a meditation pose, much like the one Obi-Wan preferred.

Anakin didn’t respond, his throat too dry and sharp from vomiting. Instead, he surveyed the room to see if there was anything that would give him a clue to the time that had passed. The lights were lowered, but whether or not that was from the night cycle or Dooku’s preference he wasn’t sure. They could’ve been this low before and he just didn’t remember.

“Well, considering your lack of panic or blame, this type of thing must happen to you with some regularity. Interesting.” The irritating beard stroking was back, the motion too much like Obi-Wan’s to be a coincidence. “I decided to do some delving around your head while you were incapacitated and found the strangest thing.”

Alarm flooded through him, if Dooku had been successful then the entire Republic could be at risk with the information he held. Battle plans, strategies, fleet locations, technical information on their entire fleet, and so much more that he knew could damn them. He kept the panic off his face and strengthened his mental shields, ignoring the pain it caused.

“I’m surprised you were able to find anything. Obi-Wan always tells me how disorganized I am.” His voice was hoarse and rasped in his throat, making his desperately wish for a swig of fluid to wet his throat.

“Sadly, I was unable to gather any real information useful to my cause. Master Kenobi is right in that regard, there’s a disgusting lack organization in that head of yours. But I did discover you have a very strong mind block in place.” Dooku waved a hand and a serving droid he hadn’t noticed in the corner brought a container of water to his lips.

Good sense told him not to drink anything offered by Dooku, but the pain in his throat and the sharp aftertaste of vomit overwhelmed any sense he did have. He drank greedily, the water soothing the worst of his thirst and wetting his throat.

Dooku continued as he drank, “There are very few Jedi who are powerful enough to perform a mind block on another Jedi. Even fewer who are able to create one of that magnitude. I’d suspect the entire Council was involved in the process.”

Anakin couldn’t deny his own interest was piqued even if he refused to show it. He’d heard of a mind block, seen a few, but it was mostly done as something small or singular, much like a mind trick. Obi-Wan was rather gifted with mind tricks and had performed a few simple mind blocks on civilians when necessary. What Dooku was describing sounded much larger than what he had seen.

“Of course, I have assisted over the years in implementing some stronger mind blocks as part of a group effort when necessary. Usually in conjunction with a Mind Healer.”

“Whatever you think you saw, Dooku, is wrong. There’s no mind block, I’d be able to sense it.” Anakin was getting tired of the superior attitude, wishing he still had the bond with Obi-Wan so he would know if there was a rescue party coming for him. The more Dooku talked, the worse his migraine was getting and he couldn’t afford another episode.

Dooku chuckled, “As powerful as you are, Skywalker, you are far too naive. The reason you can’t sense the mind block is because an aversion has been built into your mind. When you start to think about the blocked memories, your head hurts. The harder you fight it, the worse the pain gets until you have one of those spells you exhibited earlier.”

He almost told Dooku about the psychic backlash he’d suffered that was the cause of all his episodes just to prove him wrong, but he knew he didn’t need to provide him with more ammo against him. Still, the temptation was there. Instead, he kept silent, not wanting to give Dooku the gratification.

“Still, there are ways to override even as strong of a mind block as the one in your head. It’s not… pleasant… but my Master wants to know what the Council doesn’t want you to know.” At another one of Dooku’s gestures, he heard the sound of multiple electrostaffs igniting. “I’ll be back to check on your progress later.” He left the room.

This wasn’t his first experience being tortured with an electrostaff by magna guards, he could endure it until Obi-Wan arrived. Obi-Wan would save him, he always did. The first staff touched his skin and he could no longer think beyond the pain.

The only reprieve from the torture was Dooku’s limited visits, usually with a med droid in attendance to administer the bare minimum to keep him conscious and alive. Occasionally he was allowed a reprieve as another seizure wracked his body. The remainder of the time was spent in unrelenting agony, the electricity doing its damage to his nervous system the med droid did nothing to correct.

Sounds of shouting, blaster fire, and the hum of a lightsaber echoed through the halls, filling Anakin with a dull sense of hope. The magna guards had stopped some time ago, but he was only just now aware of anything going on outside his room. He couldn’t find the energy to shout in answer to his name being called, slipping in and out of a stupor with his awareness.

At least the pain had stopped, or had it? He was confused because he could no longer feel his body yet he felt it all at once. His body hurt or tingled, the feelings were hard to decipher as his nerves were far too overstimulated. He couldn’t tell if his eyes were open or if it was simply dark in the room. Maybe he wasn’t even awake. Maybe they’d overloaded his heart for the last time and couldn’t revive him.

A hand brushed over his forehead and everything lit up. The contact was too much, the sheets he could now feel were too much. The noises, the smells, it was all too much. Panic set in when he realized he couldn’t move his limbs. Distantly, he heard someone saying his name, but he couldn’t answer, couldn’t twitch a finger, couldn’t do anything but suffer.

Blackness fell again and he blissfully drifted within his mind and the Force, free of the confines of his body. Memories that were his, but not his, drifted with him. Feelings, emotions, knowledge, it all flowed with him in the nothingness.

[icsek]

Ch. 2 Losing Balance

This time, when he woke he was no longer in the Hall of Healing, he actually didn’t know where he was, the room as bare as a cell but the walls a glaring white and covered with padding. It was much too bright for him, the sharp ache between his eyes and throbbing temple making him feel nauseous. He reached out with the force to help ease the pain only to find that he was unable to touch it. Now he felt the force suppressing collar around his neck and the panic only fueled his confusion. Last he remembered he’d-, the pain grew into agony the more he tried to remember. His mind was blank about the last place he’d been.

“Anakin, calm down, you’re just hurting yourself.” Master Luminara was there, pressing a cool hand to his forehead and helping to ease some of the pain while soothing the worst of the panic.

“Where? What?” He croaked, now able to feel just how parched and scratchy his throat was.

“You’re at the Temple, Skywalker, in one of the holding rooms in the Mind Healer’s ward. You experienced some mental trauma and memory loss when you returned from your latest mission. When we tried to help, you were delirious and incoherent. You kept trying to attack us so we were forced to bring you here and break your connection with the force.”

He vaguely remembered the anger and fear swelling within him, trying to lash out at something, but the memory was fuzzy and incomplete. At least he’d made it back from wherever he’d been, it wasn’t too surprising that he didn’t remember. After Ahsoka had left the Order, he’d thrown himself into mission after mission to keep his mind occupied. They’d all started to blur together even before whatever had happened, happened.

“Water?” Having anticipated his request, she helped him sit up before bringing the straw to his lips. The water felt soothing on his throat and helped rid the gross feeling in his mouth that came with being asleep for too long. He drank the entire glass before pulling away. “Can you take the collar off now?”

Master Luminara frowned and shook her head, “We’d prefer you keep it a few days to let your mind heal before we take it off. The trauma was rather severe and we need to perform some healing before you’re ready to cope with access to the force again.” She smiled sadly at him.

“There’s something you aren’t telling me, Luminara.” Even without the force, he could feel that she was leaving something out.

“They didn’t want me to tell you this so soon, but I feel not telling you will do more harm than good.” She sighed, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder before continuing, “Whatever happened to you, it severed your bond with Obi-Wan.”

Shock reeled through him, a memory of frayed ends and a gaping nothing flooding back to him with more pain. He winced, rubbing his temples in an attempt to ward off the phantom pain. “I… remember. Sort of, at least of the bond snapping. It hurt. Is Obi-Wan ok?” Whatever pain he’d felt, he knew his former Master would’ve felt as well.

“Master Kenobi is fine. He had a bad headache and he was dazed, but he was at the Temple and we were able to stave the worst of it off. A few days rest and he was fine.” She brushed the bangs from his forehead and he felt the soothing touch of healing in his head again.

“Can you have him come by?” He felt like he needed to apologize for something, though what exactly was apparently part of the memory loss.

“I’m sorry, Anakin, but with your bond being severed after so long, it was decided that you two should be kept separate just in case the bond tries to re-form on its own. Your mind can’t handle that right now and you’re no longer his Padawan so it’s not needed anyway. It’s why we’re keeping you here, the room, too, is shielded. Now get some sleep, someone will be by to check on you later.”

Exhaustion blanketed him, the effort of just the simple conversation having drained him of any remaining energy. He let himself drift back into the comfort of sleep.

The observation room was silent, each seemingly holding their breath as they watched Anakin drift back into sleep. Relief was evident on most of their faces as was exhaustion. Luminara joined them after performing a final check of Anakin’s vitals.

“Does it seem to be holding, Master Luminara?” Mace was the first to break the silence.

Luminara sighed, “For now, but he’s as cut off from the Force as possible right now. The real test will be when we start to reintroduce the connection. This is a good start compared to the others, though. And there’s still the other question of how much memory we’ve blocked, but the only one, other than Skywalker, who could really be a judge of that would be Obi-Wan.”

“Fragile, Skywalker’s balance is still. Centered around Obi-Wan, much of his balance is.” Yoda shook his head, “Allow them together, in a few days we could. A good test of the mind block, it will be.”

“And if it fails again?.” Plo asked.

Mace stroked his chin in thought, “We’ll do what we must.”

The Temple had always been a place of peace and relaxation for Obi-Wan. He’d never been able to understand Anakin’s claims of it being a stifling place until now. Everywhere he went there seemed to be someone or some issue needing his attention. While he was grounded from the front lines, the Council was keeping him busy with teaching youngling classes and performing official Council business that ‘only he could do.’ He knew what they were trying to do, but it was only helping so much.

At least no one bothered him in his new quarters, not that he was there for more than sleeping purposes. All those years he spent complaining about Anakin interrupting his sleep with his snoring or midnight tinkering or eating, he wish he could take them back. It was too quiet, too clean, both in the quarters and in his head. Especially in his head.

Obi-Wan sighed and stirred his tea, trying not to let this cup grow cold like the last two had. It had been weeks since their bo-, it, happened and he no longer suffered from migraines. He’d still not been allowed to see Anakin after the first time.

The Council made him sit out on any discussions of what would be Anakin’s fate. He only knew of their plan once they informed him of their decision.

Anakin’s fall had been confirmed by four different Jedi Masters, the dark side curled around him like a dog waiting his master’s orders. He stared them down with hate-filled yellow eyes and screamed at them that it was all their fault. That they had taken Obi-Wan away from him.

When Obi-Wan had went to visit, Master Plo had pulled him aside and tried to give him warning of what to expect. Even the warning didn’t prepare him for what he saw.

The room had been stripped of everything except the bed and bolted down table. There were sizeable dents in the durasteel walls where things had made hard impacts, more than likely with the Force. Anakin was bound to the bed with Force-proof cuffs. His eyes were closed, but quickly opened when Obi-Wan took a few steps in the room.

“Ma-Master?” Anakin looked so hopeful that Obi-Wan’s heart clenched. The yellow seemed to fade from his eyes, but it could easily his mind playing tricks on him.

All he wanted to do was run his fingers through dirty blonde curls, to hold him tight like he had when he was younger, but he knew he had to resist. He’d been sent here for a purpose, “Yes, Anakin.”

Tears started to flow, “Why did you let them, Master? Why don’t you want me anymore?”

Every ounce of discipline and willpower he had went into keep his Jedi Master facade up and to keep his voice steady. He was grateful for the room’s shielding as he knew his were faltering under the onslaught of his own emotions. “Anakin, you haven’t been my Padawan for five years. We were supposed to have done this years ago. I thought that it might fade on its own, many training bonds do, but you relied heavily on it.” He patted Anakin’s bound hand awkwardly, “Attachment is not the Jedi way and you weren’t able to let me go as you proved over the last few missions. It is past time for us part and go our separate ways.”

Fury battered Obi-Wan’s pitiful shields, fury and hate. He knew the feel and taste of Anakin’s emotions, knew just how powerful he could be, but the pain of a bond starting to forcibly reform drove him to his knees, unable to do anything about it. “Anakin, control yourself, please!”

“I HATE YOU!” The cuffs around Anakin’s wrists sparked and fizzled out. Lights overhead began to flicker and the table groaned as it shuddered under the uncontrolled fury.

Belatedly, Obi-Wan realized that someone was shouting his name or shouting for help. He wasn’t quite sure, the pain in his head overwhelming his senses until it all turned black.

The Council had forbid him access to Anakin after that episode, but the damage had been done. Anakin was considered too dangerous, too powerful to keep contained so the Council had made the decision to block and erase his memories around his attachments. He was needed for the war effort, they couldn’t afford to lose him, so this was their best solution. They would perform the mind block and forcibly drain the darkside energies from his body and aura.

Except the first one didn’t take. He’d nearly brought down the entire Healing Wing in his fit of rage when he broke down the mind block. The second one was much the same although it took hours instead of minutes. The third had seemed to hold until they had slowly allowed him access to the Force. Now they were on their fourth attempt, more than had been done on a person in over a millenia. It was a testament to Anakin’s mental fortitude that there was still some of him left.

Still, the reports from Master Luminara were promising. They’d made cover memories this time to explain the loss of bond and the distance between him and Obi-Wan. Master Yoda had pulled some of Obi-Wan’s own memories to help form the new ones and to make them familiar.

A part of him still whispered that it was his fault any of this had happened. He’d not been a good enough Master to Anakin, he’d not taught him the lessons he needed to learn, that he had encouraged the attachment because of his own feelings-

He cut off the rest of that line of thinking, it wouldn’t solve any of the issues at hand.

If this mind block didn’t take, Master Plo had informed him that Anakin would either be forced through another round of the mind block or sent to the Citadel. The Council hadn’t been able to make a decision one way or the other, the vote split evenly in half since Obi-Wan wasn’t allowed to vote. Either of the choices were a death sentence for Anakin. He’d be killed if he was sent to the Citadel considering he the majority of the residents there. If they tried a mind block again, he’d more than likely end up a hollow shell of who he was.

The beep of his comm startled Obi-Wan out of his thoughts, “Kenobi.” He didn’t bother to switch on the holo function, more than likely it was just another Council member with yet another task for him to perform.

“Good evening, Master Kenobi. I do hope I’m not disturbing you.”

The sound of Padme Amidala’s voice brought a brief smile to his face, “Not at all, Senator. It’s always a pleasure to hear from you. Is there something I can do for you?”

A brief hesitation in her response and he knew what she was calling about before she even responded, “I haven’t heard from Anakin in a few weeks since I saw the both of you after the Senate session. We were supposed to have dinner together one night while he was still planetside, but he hasn’t returned any of my comms. Was he redeployed?”

There was no way he could tell her exactly what had happened or Anakin’s current status. Which presented another issue, he had known they were involved for years and overlooked it as them simply finding comfort with each other. What he hadn’t known was exactly how involved they were. Their secret marriage had come to light when the Council had broken through Anakin’s tight shields and sifted through his memories.

Still, she was owed at least somewhat of an explanation, especially since Anakin would no longer remember their marriage or love. At least give her the opportunity to grieve and move on.

“Are you free right now? This isn’t a conversation I would like to have over the comm.” He might as well get it over with now.

“Yes, I’m at my apartment if you would like to come over. I’ll have Threepio prepare some tea for you.” It was a testament to her ability as a politician that she didn’t sound affected by his response.

“Thank you, I will be there shortly.”

All in all, his meeting with the Senator had went better than had expected. Obi-Wan had given her the vague cover story the Council had made up about his absence. He broke the news about Anakin’s memory loss from an attack while on mission in the lower levels as gently as he could. He assured her that Anakin was healing and with the best Mind Healers the Jedi had, but that the loss was permanent.

Padme had looked pained, but relieved and thanked him. It was then that he carefully explained that the Order knew about their marriage and that they would help her have it annulled quietly. He tried to be compassionate as he told her she could no longer contact Anakin and to treat this opportunity as a second chance. She had broken down at that point, crying and confessing that their relationship had been failing anyway with all the secrets.

It was her next words that had made him shatter too.

“He always loved you more than me, Obi-Wan. He loved the idea of me, and to some extent, he did love me, but it was as someone to protect and shelter. He always held back with me, scared to hurt me. You, he loves with everything, as equals. I was so jealous of you that I pushed the marriage in an effort to make him choose between you and me. It’s always been you, it always will be you. Just as it has always been him for you. Take this second chance, Obi-Wan, and don’t let him go.”

Everything clicked into place then. The strength of their bond, their ability to seamlessly fit together, their perfect balance together. Anakin wasn’t just his best friend, brother, and former padawan. Anakin was the other half to his soul and he’d willingly let them be ripped in half.

[tennessoui]

new chapter of like saints like monsters got me crying in the club !! obi-wan setting more alarms both as a sign that he TRUSTS anakin to return, he said he would come back after X number of sounds so clearly after enough sounds he'll be back !!!! but also :( not understanding that the sounds arent whats bringing his ani back... the angst and guilt of anakin wanting to be as close to obi as possible while also trying to get him back to where he used to be (but still !!! loving him as he is !!!) literally. screaming. crying. weeping. etc. was so excited for the chapter, ty and good job !!!!

thank you!!! and also absolutely you understand lslm perfectly

it's an interplay of faith and guilt on both their parts---"you'll come back to me but i love you while you're gone all the same even though: know i shouldn't love you the way i do"---with a touch of so much obsession that's like "if i could i would crawl inside your body to live inside you where it is safe and warm" that there's no way they could ever ever be normal about each other about anything

tbh i really don't think about the titles to my fics after i post them, but i think "like saints, like monsters" short for "we love like saints, like monsters: devoutly, devouring" is pretty on the nose for this obikin au

[tennessoui]

obikin and 35 👀

35. One of them is trying to get the other off of drugs

(all below the cut because cw: drugs, though it's framed as anakin's first time using and obi-wan is trying to help him with the come down) (mostly angst and a bit of miscommunication)

Anakin’s never in his entire life seen Obi-Wan this mad at him. Not even when he’d been arrested by the Coruscanti police for crashing his speeder into a public fountain. Not even when he’d been arrested for illegal pod-racing. Not even when he’d been arrested for illegal pod-racing again. Not even when he’d followed Obi-Wan to Utapau, completely ignoring his own orders because he couldn’t let his master fight Grievous alone. What would have happened if Anakin had not been there in the fight against Dooku when the Chancellor had been kidnapped? Obi-Wan would have died. Anakin made sure that didn’t happen. Only Dooku had died, which Obi-Wan hadn’t liked finding out about, but Anakin had been acting on orders.

Sure, a Sith’s orders, but Anakin hadn’t known that then. But it makes sense, looking back on it. Only a person made of pure evil would try to insist on Anakin leaving Obi-Wan behind to die without Anakin beside him. He should have known something was up then, and all the times the Chancellor had said something not nice about his master.

Obi-Wan is so nice! And so pretty. And so kind and brave and strong and smart and fit and handsome and perfect and good.

What was Anakin saying? It’s hard to think in straight lines right now. The room is kind of spinning, or maybe the floor is made of tiny little oceans. Anakin would hate that. Mostly because Obi-Wan can complain for hours when his socks get wet, and he’s already looking angry enough.

Oh! Obi-Wan is mad at him. Oh. Anakin hates when Obi-Wan’s mad at him, especially now that they kiss sometimes, because whenever Obi-Wan is even a little annoyed with him for doing stuff like leaving droid parts on the floor or not washing his dishes or putting his cold toes in between Obi-Wan’s very warm legs when they’re in bed, Obi-Wan holds his kisses hostage until Anakin’s corrected whatever behavior the older man doesn’t like. It’s awful, it’s agony to be denied kisses and cuddles now that he’s had them before.

In Anakin’s opinion, he should get an unlimited amount of kisses and cuddles from his master, whenever he wants them. Maybe that’s an established relationship privilege though. Anakin wants to establish their relationship, but whenever he tries to bring up his serious, very obvious attachment to his master, Obi-Wan changes the subject. Mostly by kissing him, which is very highly effective.

The reminder makes him pout even as Obi-Wan keys in the code to their quarters and the door slides open. Obi-Wan goes straight to the kitchen, doesn’t even check to see if Anakin’s following him in. He hasn’t looked at Anakin once since he found him in the club and got a good look at his eyes.

Anakin feels like crying, curling up into a little ball on the floor and letting the oceans swallow him whole. He’d rather die than live in a world where Obi-Wan hates him. And he definitely hates him. He definitely never wants to be in a relationship with him, probably wants to break their bond and move out, start training another Padawan just so he can forget all about the first one who failed him so terribly.

He doesn’t even realize he’s started crying until a sob breaks its way out of the tightness in his chest. Somehow he’s on the ground, although he doesn’t remember deciding to consciously relocate. He pulls his knees up to his chest and buries his face in them, clutching tightly to himself as he tries not to shake apart.

It had been a normal fight on a bad day, when Anakin already was not thinking clearly. And so he’d excused himself from the silence of their apartments and gone into Coruscant proper, which had led him down to the lower levels, which had led him into a seedy bar. And when someone had offered to sell him deathsticks, his first thought had been how much Obi-Wan would disapprove, followed closely by the thought that it would be rather nice to get out of his head for a bit. He hadn’t thought Obi-Wan would track him down a few hours later, hadn’t thought that Obi-Wan would be so furious at him, enough to snatch him out of the pile of strangers he’d been lying amongst and take him, tight-lipped and silent the entire time, back to the Temple.

There’s footsteps right in front of him and they’re so loud, even though logically Anakin knows it’s just Obi-Wan. He still flinches back. Obi-Wan’s always had the capacity to hurt Anakin the most, but it’s even worse now since they started doing whatever it is they’re doing. Obi-Wan could single-handedly destroy him now. He might be getting ready to do that now.

Anakin raises his head to look up at Obi-Wan, who’s kneeling just in front of him with a glass of water held tightly in one hand. He doesn’t look as mad anymore, but he definitely looks sad.

That’s even worse. Anakin made him sad. He reaches out with his hand to touch Obi-Wan’s frown, but the world gets too unfocused before he can quite get there. Everything had felt light and floaty at the club, like he and everyone else had been weightless entities. Now the same feeling makes him feel nauseous.

He just wants it to stop, just wants this over with. Can't they just get this over with? He never should have done it in the first place, never should have said yes, now everything is wrong and awful and Anakin knows it was a mistake from the beginning.

Obi-Wan flinches back as if he’s been struck. He stands abruptly and turns away, running a shaking hand over his face. “Ah. I understand, dear--Anakin. Anakin.”

Anakin blinks because he doesn’t understand anything anymore. Had he been speaking out loud?

“Would you allow me to…help you to bed?”

Anakin nods because Obi-Wan’s always allowed to help him to bed, especially if he’s going to be staying with him afterwards.

Obi-Wan sets down the cup of water and gently pulls Anakin to his feet. He immediately latches onto the man’s heat, just now realizing how cold he is. Obi-Wan is stiff in his arms, which makes Anakin want to cry again.

He gets deposited on the mattress, but a hand presses against his back before he can lie down.

“Drink this,” Obi-Wan says quietly from somewhere next to him. Or behind him. It’s hard for Anakin to tell right now. The water is pressed to his lips.

“Tastes funny,” he says between sips. Obi-Wan seems instinctively to know just how fast to give it to him. Obi-Wan’s perfect. Obi-Wan deserves so much better.

The thought makes his chest hurt in panic. He presses his face past the glass, into the familiar warmth of his master’s tunics. “Are we gonna stop now?” he slurs. He tries to find the words to articulate himself better, even tries to use the bond, but Obi-Wan’s shields are drawn tight around his mind. Anakin is shut out.

But Obi-Wan’s still here, taking care of him. It’s all very confusing.

“If that’s what you want,” his master says very softly, as if in a great deal of pain. “I would never force you to continue to...be with me in that way. I thought you wanted--but. No, dearest. I mean, no, Anakin. I’ll put in a request for a room transfer tomorrow. You don’t...need to poison yourself with deathsticks to get away from me.”

Tears well up in Anakin’s eyes and he flips around on the bed so he doesn’t have to look at the face of the man who’s breaking his heart. He isn’t strong enough for some things. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles. A hand falls onto his hair and gives it a few strokes. Anakin flinches away. There’s no love in the motion. He doesn’t want it.

“Leave, please,” Anakin demands, trying to find solace in his closed eyes and only finding a spinning sense of darkness.

Obi-Wan inhales sharply, but Anakin can feel him get up from the mattress slowly. “We can talk more about this in the morning when you are more yourself.”

Anakin remains stubbornly silent.

“I’ll be just outside if you need me.”

Anakin is trying to make himself believe that he’ll never need Obi-Wan or anyone else ever again. All it gets him is pain.

“Okay,” Obi-Wan breathes out, and then there are steps and then the sounds of the door opening and closing and then Anakin is alone.