#ofmdskeletoncrew

[onlylostphysics]

never gave a damn about the weather (6296 words)

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Additional Tags: Post-Episode: s01e07 This Is Happening, Horror, Storms, Ghosts, Hurt/Comfort, Memory Issues, one brief and magically-induced murder attempt, First Kiss, Flirting, Happy Ending

"I'd hate for this coat to get wet," Stede admits, taking a step backwards. It's not like he's scared of storms – he finds them quite thrilling, actually. As long as he's in his cabin. With everything lashed down. And not a hint of rain anywhere near him. "You could, er, join me, if you like? Ride out the storm together?" he asks, with a grey kind of hope. Ed grins, bright and dazzling even under the beard. "And miss this?" he says, his gaze darting up to the sky. "Mate, I fuckin' love storms." "Ye won't like this one," Buttons says, dark and quiet.

The Revenge hits a spot of bad weather.

Written for the prompt storm as part of the OFMD Skeleton Crew fest!

[livelydiver]

Over here, child!

Skeleton Season [AO3]

Rating: Explicit | Words: 8531 | Chapters: 1/1

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV) Relationship: Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet Additional Tags: Fluff and Smut, Established Relationship, Decorative Gourd Season, Skeletons, Aztec Curse (Pirates of the Caribbean), Blackbeard | Edward Teach Loves Stede Bonnet, Stede Bonnet Loves Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Foreplay, Rimming, Anal, Bottom Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Service Top Stede Bonnet

That’s how Ed learns that Stede doesn’t just like autumn for the spiced drinks and splashy pumpkin-themed decor and gold-toned sweaters. Stede Bonnet likes things that are spooky.

Ed sets out to give Stede the decorative gourd season of his dreams and gets a bit more than he bargained for.

Fresh fic! Fluff, romance and freaky, spooky-season smut. For the OFMD Skeleton Crew fest [@ofmdskeletoncrew], prompts: 👻 [2] CURSE 🌕 [13] MOONLIGHT and of course 🦴 [28] SKELETON. Thanks for reading!

[phantom-ellie]

The Man who has Never Felt Anything Chapter 3: A Hair’s Breadth from Life

Click here for CW/Full Chapter List

Sometimes my mouth is so dry, it's like I am on a baking pan, I am dough rising in the oven, I am the flour dusting the pan, turning brown and crispy, but it's extra seasoning, I suppose. Sometimes I am sand, on a sandy beach, fuck all I'd wanted was a vacation. Vacations are stressful. Who has ever had a proper, relaxing vacation?

I don't think I've ever been relaxed in my life. At least not sober.

Sometimes I feel like my head is made of smoke, and I keep my eyes closed because what if they glow? What if it's me, after all? What if I'm the monster?

But I think that's giving myself too much credit. Monsters go out with a bang, me with a whimper.

Sometimes I'm just staring out into the cabin from my bed, watching him watching me. Blackbeard, and he's the one with the head of smoke, spear pointed at my heart. What did I ever do to him? Probably nothing. That's probably why he wants me dead, because I've done nothing, not one thing my whole life. Except that one time, when I ran away. Blackbeard doesn't like cowards. Rich people. People who fall into traps. People who get stabbed.

And that's why he's glaring at me there, and yes, a head of smoke can look angry, thank you very much. Try making a head of smoke look gentle, kind, soft, like the hand I feel resting on my side. It's been caressing me up and down, like a mother for a sick child, and this I know must be the nightmare, the hallucination, because who would do that? To me?

Not Blackbeard. Because that's not what we do to pirates.

And, of course, even at running away I was useless. Didn't run very far at all. Because Mary has found me. And all she can talk about is the letter I left, as if it wasn't everything I could possibly give. I couldn't give her love, affection, a conversation. It was impossible, it was insurmountable. The letter was enough, should have been enough, and everything else I had. But she wanted my heart.

But deep down I've always known that I have no heart to give away. Not the love kind. I don't think I've ever felt it, not even once. Or if I did, it wasn't enough, it wasn't good. Maybe I'm allergic. Maybe there's a problem with digestion, maybe love enters me and slides right through and out like a thief in the night, and I've never noticed it. Not even once. That could be it. It would check out, I guess. If I were immune to love. If it's real, which I'm not sure about, I've never seen it.

And I'm really sorry to be ruining the overall vibe of this nightmare, you're scary Blackbeard, really, you are, terrifying, it's just that I've never really felt much. I'm good at panicking, that's a skill I've picked up, but fear is different. Fear is a reaction to potential loss. Losing something important, something valued.

I've never really been worried about losing something I value, because I've never had that in the first place.

And maybe admitting that is why Alma is here, and is angry with me, too. Because if I valued my children, I wouldn't have left. But I did.

Goodbye, children, you'll never see papa again.

I left them behind for my new family here, on the sea. But they didn't take to me either. I should have anticipated that.

Blackbeard is ready now. He's coming for me, here's here to grant me the liberty of death and justice for all I've hurt. And I'm scared, a little. I am. I think I feel some fear. Just a bit. I think I'm afraid of losing the future, the potential to fix what is wrong with me one day, the chance to find out if there's anyone who could love me after all. There are so many people I've never met. It could have been them. I don't want to lose it.

So that's why I scream when Blackbeard raises the spear and impales me in the stomach.

Chapter 4

[veeagainsttheday]

I wrote something for the #ofmdskeletoncrew challenge. A spOOOooooKY story!

[ofmdskeletoncrew]

Skeleton Crew: a low-stress horror & spooky fanworks fest for Our Flag Means Death!

💀 It will run throughout October on tumblr and AO3. To take part, just pick a prompt and start creating! Works tagged #ofmdskeletoncrew will be reblogged here.

💀 Check out the FAQs on our page to find out more.

Prompts in plain text after the jump:

1. Storm 2. Curse 3. Burning 4. Nightmare 5. Eldritch 6. Blood 7. Haunting 8. Monster 9. Shipwreck 10. Cold 11. Ritual 12. Graveyard 13. Moonlight 14. Shark 15. Superstition 16. Hungry 17. Nature 18. Underwater 19. Hunted 20. Forget 21. Ghosts 22. Fog 23. Demon 24. Marooned 25. Witch 26. Stolen 27. Becalmed 28. Skeleton 29. Escape 30. Silence 31. Trick or Treat

[phantom-ellie]

The Man who Forgot: Chapter 1

Click Here for CW Warnings/Full Chapter List

Our Flag Means Death fic for Whumptober 2022. Day 5: Hyperthermia.

Sometimes when I start a sentence I think of a brand new thing to say in the middle and start that

Sometimes, listen, sometimes, sometimes the words don't quite come the fuck out right but it's all there, right there, right in my head, if you could only see it instead of me having to

Sometimes I have to share a thought, and I have a lot of fucking thoughts, long thoughts, so many ideas, and sometimes I need to share them there, now, I can't wait for anyone else to finish

Sometimes I forget things. I turn around and they're gone. I can't put things in drawers, they might as well be in the fucking sea, man, in drawers things don't exist. It needs to be spread out before me. That's why I'm so fucking great at what I do. The world, the whole world is spread out before me. I can sail to and fro, I can pillage or take, I can go away, come back, I can forget.

Sometimes forgetting is the best thing about being me.

But not today.

Because I fucking forgot.

I had a lot on my mind, and a mind like mine always has a lot on top of it, you know. Overflowing with stuff, real brilliant shit. Everyone is very impressed by the shit that comes out of my mind. Except Izzy, Izzy is never impressed. Izzy doesn't want to hear about it. Izzy is so fucking boring.

Izzy had to go, he chose to go, he was going to hurt- he was going. I had to say goodbye. Izzy is my friend, after all. He helps me concentrate, helps me decide what needs to be done and what can be put aside. What skills I need to use and which ones are useless, but they're all equal in my head, you see. Everything has one voice, the same pitch. Everything I feel courses through me, fighting for attention. I've always felt too much, but I've never been enough.

Only recently I've been thinking, I've been thinking a lot more than usual. I've been thinking that maybe Izzy picks the wrong things to focus on. Maybe those things don't make me happy. Maybe there are other ways to be happy. Maybe I can just be who I am, maybe I'm just fucking fine like this, the way I am. Maybe I'm enough without pretending. It's just a thought, an experiment I'm doing. The experiment was going pretty damn well, before tonight. Or maybe even after the night started. I made a friend, after all. Someone who saw past the noise and didn't mind the focused me, the violent me, the successful me, and wanted to know the inner-me that I don't even know yet. But I wanted to find out.

Izzy fucked it all up, as usual. So he had to go. He was going. Those were the terms, and fuck, he set the terms, so he shouldn't be pissed, right? They were his damn terms.

So he went, and I just had a lot to think about. I had a lot to think about, and I could have talked to Stede but lately I've been a little afraid to talk to Stede, because I'm worried the wrong things will fall out of my mouth at the wrong time. I have a lot of thoughts about Stede. He overflows my fucking brain, sometimes, and I can't control it. Better to think alone.

Except. Except, I forgot. I forgot that his crew was useless. I forgot they wouldn't think to get him down. I forgot that they would wait for me. I forgot to supervise it myself. I forgot that he was even fucking there, because I didn't see him, I was facing away. And when I don't see, I forget.

Sometimes I forget to stay out of the sun. I don't burn too much, but when the sun is too bright for too long it can still be bad for you. You can get dehydrated, you can make mistakes. But I can handle that, I'm seasoned, I'm skilled.

So the sun is blazing in the day time, and I'm still thinking, still parsing through what I need to know, what I need to accept, when I remember that it's hot. And I decide to go inside. I haven't seen Stede in a while, I didn't join him for breakfast. He probably didn't want any, was what I was thinking, because he'd been gut stabbed. By my friend, Izzy. But Izzy wasn't really my friend after all. Luckily there's Stede.

So I turn around to head into the galley and fuck me, there's Stede. Still pinned to the mass. Sword sticking out of him and everything. Nobody got him down. I sure didn't get him down. I forgot. How could everyone else forget, too? How could we all forget Stede?

So I run down, I'm yelling at everyone, and fuck it's hot, it shouldn't be this hot this time of year. And Stede is wearing this black jumper, these black trousers, and he's just gone, completely out, held up by this sword sticking into the mast. And I'm yelling, I'm grabbing Stede by the shoulders, and he's fucking hot, and not in that way that creeps into my mind unbidden that I choose to forget about, but hot as in, holy fuck the sun is shining on him and he's pinned through the gut to the fucking mast! Fuck!

And I'm grabbing his shoulders and shaking him, and he doesn't open his eyes, not even once, which is bad. And I'm trying to tug out the sword, but it broke off at the end because Izzy's a moron, and that is bad. And the rest of the crew has no idea what to do about this or any fucking other thing, and that's very bad.

So I'm calling for the cook to bring his shit, his people-sewing shit or whatever, because Stede can't die. He's my friend. I don't have any others, everyone else is a dick. I'm feeling like a dick, because Stede needed me and I forgot. But Roach is coming up with his shit and I'm wrapping my arms around Stede and pulling him off the end of the fucking sword like taking a cooked rat off a fucking skewer, and he's just limp in my arms, and there is blood everywhere. All over me, all over the deck, all over Roach. And probably all over Stede, but you can't see it because of the black he's wearing, and fucking shit that doesn't help because he's hot and dying and this is the second fucking time I've almost lost him this way. It isn't cool.

I need to get my shit together.

Chapter 2

[veeagainsttheday]

I have a problem with brevity. Here's the end of my OFMD Skeleton Crew fic.

[phantom-ellie]

The Man who has Never Felt Anything Chapter 2

Click here for CW/Full Chapter List

This is all certainly a mess. I must apologize ahead of time. For the burning. I didn’t mean to set it on fire.

Okay, so that’s a lie. I started the fire. I left. I just hoped they wouldn’t notice. They never noticed before.

It’s just everywhere now, a fire started in the belly, spreading up, up, and up to my neck, and my neck is a ring of fire that pushes and swirls and scorches everyone who comes near me. That’s what they get for trying. That’s what I get for wanting them to try.

I huddle down in the corner. And it’s him, Edward Bonnet. Father. Parent. Guardian. Jailor. You don’t need to raise your hand, you know. You don’t need to bring it down either, I can comply. I will stay inside. I will be good. I will obey. Obedience leads to a fruitful life. Obedience skirts the pain. The burning.

But it didn’t, he was always awful, whether he cornered me or not. Cornered with his fatherly love. So I said, if this is love, then love is a cage. So I took to the sea. Wasn’t the sea supposed to be cold?

Burning now, down the arms, a burning wrapped around the emptiness on my left hand, that empty finger. Funny, there was no burning before, in that state. Only discomfort.

Who’s this Mary, then?

Talk of being cornered. Trapped in duties, in a cold house with a cold wife. Trapped in her arms as I move upon her, disgusted and horrified. So I said, if this is love, then love is a cage. So I took to the sea. Wasn’t the sea supposed to be cold?

Cornered in the cabin. Mutiny, burning terror. Continued fire, continued scorn, they look at me. They do not respect me, and that’s ok. I wasn’t expecting respect, not from anyone. I don’t think I could ever have respect, not really. But a part of me hoped for love. The bedtime stories might be love. The flags might mean love.

But they didn’t, in the end. They meant burning. Mutiny. So I am thinking... if this is love, then love is a cage. So I'll take to the sea. Isn't the sea supposed to be cold?

It rushes over me again, burning love, burning terror, and there is no difference between the two. Fear of love, fear to love, fear that this is love, fear that love equals indifference. I suppose I will never know the truth of it. My body must be almost ash soon.

I close my eyes and I’m cornered, cornered in this bed. There is a presence nearby, blocking me in. It won’t let me leave. It is tender, it is curious, and suddenly I can’t tell the difference between the terror and the love. Is this what love feels like? Does it leave you breathless, wanting and fearing more? The scariest thing about love is the hope it brings.

I would still like to believe, even after everything, that if love is a cage, it’s still worth the burning.

Chapter 3

[phantom-ellie]

Spirit of Discernment Chapter 3: Many Bones at Cumorah

Billy the Kidd was just a skeleton, now. Sam's first love, though in hindsight it wasn't love at all, not compared to what he felt for the golden god at the community center.

Sam had never had the heart to dispose of Billy like the others. You never forget your first. Sam kept him in a duffel bag, moving him to and fro from his apartment to the bunker below his shed. Everyone had a food storage bunker, for the end times, when Jesus or Joseph Smith or whoever would return and take all the pious hypocrites to the Celestial Kingdom and leave all the debauched gays in the telestial kingdom together where they belong (and probably be much happier for it).

But Billy had been in the closet for a while, not the proverbial closet but the literal one in Sam's trailer. Sometimes Sam would remove one of his skeletal arms and wave it around like a magic wand. Sometimes he'd pill out Billy Kidd's skull and have a conversation.

Stede Bonnet taught English, Sam had learned on the community center website. Stede Bonnet taught about Shakespeare. Would Stede Bonnet like a skull as a gift? To enhance his lessons, or be dramatic? Would he enjoy his time spent with Billy as much as Sam had?

Sam had so many questions for Stede, but he knew not to come on too strong. He knew to be patient with his love, to give him time. They hadn't spoken yet, Sam fixed to his ladder pretending to work, daydreaming, mentally projecting his love towards the classroom where Stede Bonnet was wasting his life helping people who didn't love him or respect him get their GED. They didn't know the gift they had. Or maybe they did? Maybe they were there for none other than Stede, his inspiring golden aura attracting them like moths to a flame.

And they were adults, weren't they? They could make a move any time, waves the skeleton hand in Sam's face.

Sam knew he had to make his move first.

[phantom-ellie]

List of Works/Links

Hi all! Here is any information you might want to know such as links to other social media and a list of works. All works are also available on ao3. If any links don't work, please check out my ao3 instead. Fics there are organized into the same series they are here.

Links:

My Linktree

Note: Chapter fics have a special tag that goes with each one so you can find them that way if you don't want to click through here.

This fanfiction is tagged with the assumption that you have watched the show Our Flag Means Death and are okay with the canon content. All fics are tagged for triggers beyond what is shown in the original show. For example, I will not be tagging fics for swearing and alcohol use because the original show has plenty of it.

Golden Age of Piracy Series:

These are stand-alone fics that take place in the OFMD canon universe.

Temet Nosce (#ellie tn): Summary: A Stede Bonnet character study/reunion fic that explores the frequent references in the show to Stede being someone less than human. Stream of consciousness writing with a surrealist bent. 7 chapters, 14k words, complete. Content Warnings: The same kind/level of language and violence as seen on the show, no more or less.

The Man who has Never Felt Anything (#ellie mwnfa): Summary: Stream of consciousness Stede POV of being stabbed in episode 3 and episode 4. Created for #Whumptober2022 and #ofmdskeletoncrew. 4 chapters, 2.5k words. Content Warnings: The same kind/level of language and violence as seen on the show, no more or less.

The Man who Forgot (#ellie mwf): Summary: Ed POV Stream of Consciousness about forgetting to get Stede down from the mast, and the aftermath. A close to a portrayal about thinking with ADHD as I can get. Content Warnings: The same kind/level of language and violence as seen on the show, no more or less.

The Full Experience: Summary: Based on a post by @snake-snack-stede,​ Black Pete learns what Blackbeard did to Lucius and does not react as expected. Content Warnings: The same kind/level of language and violence as seen on the show, no more or less.

To Wit: Macarena!: Summary: Crack one-shot. Ed teaches Stede the Macarena. Things go exactly as planned. 1.6k words. Content Warnings: The same kind/level of language and violence as seen on the show, no more or less.

Modern AU Series:

These are my stand-alone fics that take place in a Modern AU.

Apologetics: Summary: Based on the pina coladas SMAU by @faeeebaeee. Takes place in 1987 after Stede chose Mary. Stede POV. 1k words. Content Warnings: None

The Art of (Smashing) Crockery (#ellie aosc): Summary: Modern AU where Ed owns a rage room and Stede has a lot to rage about. 30 chapters, 58k words, complete. Content Warnings: Homophobia/Bullying/Slurs (from Badmintons/Stede's father), Depression, Suicidal Ideation, Alcohol Abuse, Hospitalisation, Mental Illness

Slowvember 2022: Black Pandather: WaPandas Forever: Pandas (The Art of Smashing Crockery) Voicemail Fail: Lazy River (Doubt Thou the Stars) Stede's Friends Make Better Floral Choices Challenge: Flowers (a little louder) Room People: Lazy Sunday (The Vacation) Pick your Own Fruit (As long as it's Stede): Pick Your Own Fruit (Mismatched) the tastiest of nuts: Farmer’s Market (The Camera Loves You, Baby) If the Kraken aint happy, aint Nobody’s Happy - Beach Day (The Legend of Blackbeard) Emergency Contact: Sickfic/Nursing a Boo-Boo (like ghosts to trouble heaven)

Let Me Solo Him!

An adaptation of the Scott Pilgrim comics. Stede returns to the Revenge and discovers that he must defeat each of Ed's pirate ex-boyfriends in order to be with him forever. 6 parts.

Full Series List Volume 1: Stede Bonnet's Precious Little Life Volume 2: Stede Bonnet vs the World Volume 3: Stede Bonnet & the Infinite Sadness Volume 4: Stede Bonnet Gets it Together Volume 5: Stede Bonnet vs the Universe Volume 6: Stede Bonnet's Finest Hour Tag: ellie lmsh

Our Flag Means Stupid Bad Sex:

This series of ficlets take kinks from prompt lists and makes them as unsexy/stupid as possible.

Our Flag Means Stupid Bad Sex - Thread with list of all chapters, kinks, and pairings. Tag: #ellie stupid bad sex

OFMD Poetry:

I like to experiment with poetry. Here are all of my poems:

Poetry Work List Tag: #ellie ofmd poetry

[ofmdskeletoncrew]

What is this? A fest to inspire people to create more horror and spooky fanworks for Our Flag Means Death.

When is it on? Throughout October, but the AO3 collection will remain open indefinitely and works can be submitted at any time.

How do I take part? Pick a prompt and start creating! There's no need to sign up.

How do the prompts work? Take them as literally or metaphorically as you like. Feel free to combine prompts, flip concepts around, do whatever inspires you.

Do I have to post my work on the same day as the prompt? Definitely not! Posting a work on the corresponding day is a little extra challenge, but is in no way required.

How do I submit a work? You can: 💀 Submit your work to the Skeleton Crew collection on AO3 💀 Post your work on tumblr and either mention @ofmdskeletoncrew in the post or tag ofmdskeletoncrew, and we'll reblog it.

What types of works are allowed? Any! Fic, art, vids, podfics, crafts... if it's OFMD and spooky, it's in.

What content is allowed? Anything! All characters, all pairings, any rating, any warning, any canon or alternate universe, it's all allowed. Crossovers are also welcome.

How horrifying does my fanwork have to be? As much or as little as you like! It can be a slight chill with a happy ending or a no-survivors bloodbath. Using the AO3 warning system would be appreciated, but using 'Choose Not To Warn' is perfectly acceptable.

What are the minimum/maximum requirements? None. Works can be any length, a sketch or a full painting, etc. Whatever you've been inspired to create is welcome.

How do I avoid seeing squicks or triggers? Check out our post on tags and blacklists.

Can I promote this on twitter/discord/elsewhere? Yes, please do!

I have another question. The ask box is open!

[phantom-ellie]

List of Works and Links

I’m reorganizing my works to be more accessible on Tumblr, I didn’t really realize how Tumblr worked when I first started posting here.

Stand-alone fics that are not part of a monthly challenge will be linked directly below. Monthly Prompt Challenges will be given their own threads linked below as well so I’m not spamming this post with tons of tiny ficlets.

But first, Links:

Ao3 (all fics posted there first): Filthy_Phantom_Ellie

Twitter: Phantom_Ellie

OFMD Decembverse Challenge

Fics below are grouped by series. They can also be found in identical series on ao3.

Golden Age of Piracy Series:

These are my stand-alone fics that take place in the show’s canon universe and are not part of a prompt challenge:

Temet Nosce: Surrealist stream-of-consciousness Stede character study. 7 chapters, 14k words.

The Man who has Never Felt Anything: Stream of consciousness Stede POV of being stabbed in episode 3 and episode 4. Created for #Whumptober2022 and #ofmdskeletoncrew. 4 chapters, 2.5k words.

The Man who Forgot: Ed POV Stream of Consciousness about forgetting to get Stede down from the mast, and the aftermath. A close to a portrayal about thinking with ADHD as I can get.

The Full Experience: Based on a post by @snake-snack-stede,​ Black Pete learns what Blackbeard did to Lucius and does not react as expected.

To Wit: Macarena!: Crack one-shot. Ed teaches Stede the Macarena. 1.6k words.

Modern AU Series:

These are my stand-alone fics that take place in a Modern AU.

Apologetics: Based on  piña coladas SMAU by @faeeebaeee. Takes place in 1987 after Stede chose Mary. Stede POV. 1k words.

The Art of (Smashing) Crockery: Modern AU where Ed owns a rage room and Stede has a lot to rage about.

The Lovers, the Dreamers, and Swede: Swede-centric Modern AU where Swede is part of an environmental group that dabbles in eco-terrorism. Unfinished, on hiatus until I finish a few other fics.

Our Flag Means Stupid Bad Sex:

Kinktober 2022 series where I make each prompt as unsexy as humanly possible. Crack.

Slowvember 2022:

Fluffy/silly prompts for Slowvember. All prompts use modern AU Stede/Ed from various universes/fan works.