#oh the incessant ramblings that happen each time a new chapter comes out

[wataksampingan]

Ch 87 is out on Webtoon Fast Pass and uh. Words.

(I need a spoiler warning banner gif or something. Anyway, spoilers galore)

As usual I have nothing that makes coherent sense or contains proper punctuation.

All I got is blubbering over how humble these two leads are and how much they doubt themselves in their pain and how much good they still do in spite of it and how many more chapters to go (even beyond That One Chapter I lost sleep over) before they fully realise how well they suit each other-

....okay before Perry realises how well they suit each other.

Also, I am dying to know her stepmother's deal. Clearly Count Zahardt wasn't perfect, but saying shit like "only the faint-hearted follow illusions"* is RICH coming from her when she attempted to achieve her goals (whatever those are) by poisoning her husband (an extremely untenable - thus illusory - method). In fact, all of Perry's childhood memories of her so far have been laced with some sort of strange edge, as if this woman has resented Perry from the beginning. I know money is a huge motive but is that the only driving force behind such hatred?

So what was it really? Jealousy over the previous Countess Zahardt? Resentment against Perry's father for his (according to her) overzealous charity and her greed for more? All of the above?

Perry sure got the brunt of it, considering this one single memory brings up doubts like:

1. If the countdom grew poorer because my father just kept helping others, then that means I could be the cause of the Lapileons' downfall too since they have been helping me constantly

2. Aren't I then also neglecting those around me, like my own countdom and my uncle? Also doesn't that mean just being here instantly brings more trouble to a place that already contends with so many other problems? Even Gloria doesn't live in the manor so as not to overburden their staff and supply run

3. Was my poor father such a fool as my stepmother said? Was the man I loved best in the world really so unworthy?

4. I'm also a fool to 'chase an illusion', to think that I could ever be capable enough to continue my parents' work and legacy when I can barely do anything on my own.

In Perry's mind, it doesn't matter how quickly she learned to help with the Lapileons' household paperwork, how much she's done to bring Celphi out from his shell and how well she manages herself in noble social circles, how she gave Saoirse reason to believe in others again, how she proved to Gloria that she was quick and justified at pointing out flaws in the staffing system of the family, how she essentially rescued Islette and probably countless others from Gen - how she constantly gives Theo reasons to live, rather than just exist.

All of that pales in comparison to watching Theo succeed at seemingly Everything, while she... doesn't. That perfectionist viewpoint that she arguably received from her stepmother makes her so vulnerable to this self doubt.

But now he's actually, and very rationally, putting things into perspective, not just to make her feel better but because it's all true. It's not his talent and discipline alone that sustains the Lapileon estate. He too has received much help, and crucially, while his grandfather was a complete monster, his grandmother, uncle and siblings weren't. Comparatively, Perry only has one trustworthy uncle and no such influence/power/wealth as the Lapileons. Implicitly, to have come this far on her own speaks volumes of her strength and courage (not that she would even notice it herself)

In any case, now not only is Theo capable and successful, he's proven himself humble (humble!), and clearly grateful for her by actually vocalising it.

I love this conversation so much because Theo is gentle without being patronising, and reasonable enough that Perry can't help but see the logic. He also seems to have learned from his previous fit of anger that this woman needs coaxing. She has trust issues as numerous as his own, so he can't brute force his way into her confidence.

But they are so similar, it's wonderful to see him immediately on the same page, immediately recognising her doubts because he's probably had similar thoughts growing up. He was made grand duke after his older brother died and sister incapacitated by grief. He too must live up to a legacy left behind by people he respects and loves. There are huge shoes to fill for him too.

Also:

You did this to yourself Pereshati LMAO

(forever laughing at how he was so focused on pouring out his true feelings to her that he went on auto pilot and won)

Oh oh, one more unrelated thing to yell fruitlessly into the ether:

ENGLISH BOOK PUBLICATION WHEN, WEBTOON?? KOREAN VOL. 3 IS ALREADY DUE ON THE 27TH!!

* I forgot this was a flashback to ep 31!!

...Lillian is still incredibly malicious and suspicious!!

[bakuhoes-dumbass]

Aberration - Chapter 3

MHA!Various x Fem!Reader

Thriller/Horror/Drama

Criminal!AU

Words: 2.8k

A/N: Third chap, here we go! It’ll start picking up soon. I know there isn’t much ‘horror’ rn, but it will get there, I promise. Also, I’m sorry Tamaki’s part is a bit longer than Hawks. I just adore Tamaki so much and he deserves the world and lots of hugs and kithes.

Warnings: Yandere Themes, Mentions of murder, blood, felonies, bullying, swearing. More to come.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of MHA, just this story. In no way does this reflect the characters, writers or VAs of the show/manga. MINORS DNI.

~~~

Aberration Masterlist

~~~

"Good afternoon Mr. Keigo, my name is Y/N and I'll-" You look up from your notes to see a half naked man with blonde hair and bright red bird wings lounging on his bed. Your jaw drops and you hold your clipboard up in front of your suddenly heated face.

Keigo looks over to you with his brows raised. "Well well, looks like we've got ourselves a new baby bird. How…" The handsome man's lips turn up into a cocky smirk.

"...interesting."

You peek over your clipboard to see his cocky smirk and hide your eyes again. "Keigo, would you please put on a shirt?"

He chuckles and wiggles his eyebrows. "What, too embarrassed to look at me, baby bird? I'll tell you what. You tell me who you are, and if you're single, and I'll cover myself."

"My name is Y/N. I'm the newest scientist in this facility, here to observe you, hoping it helps to find a cure. And there is no need for you to know my relationship status."

"Ah, ah, ah. If you don't tell me, you'll have to do this interview while gazing at my gorgeous body." You hear the cockiness in his voice.

"I swear to fu- fine, yes I'm currently happily single. Now, please put your shirt on." You mumble under your breath, "this is so inappropriate."

After a minute of rustling, Keigo leans back onto his bed. "Okay, my single baby bird. I'm all covered up for you."

You lower your clipboard just below your eyes to make sure, seeing the smirking bird man lounging on his bed with a shirt on. You finally lower your clipboard all the way before giving a curt nod. Making your way to the desk chair, you smile at the man.

"Thank you, Keigo. As I said before, my name is Y/N and I'm here to get to know you."

He snickers, "well, I'm here to answer any questions you have for me, baby bird. Fire away."

You sigh and open your notebook. "Must you call me such a name?"

"Awe, do you not like when I call you that?"

Sighing once more, you decide to just move on. You know you'll end up going in circles. "Please state your full name, age and date of birth for me."

"My name is Keigo Takami. I'm 28 years old. My birthday is December 28th." He paused to let you write that down before opening his mouth again. "Did you need my star sign and my relationship status? Well, I'm a Capricorn and I am definitely sin-"

"Nope, that's enough." You cut him off before he could ramble on even more. "Now, can you tell me what your quirk is exactly?"

Keigo blinks before turning around, the chains on his ankles clanking against the bed frame. Your eyes light up being able to actually see the giant, beautiful red bird wings coming from his back. You frowned slightly noticing they were pinned down, preventing him from being able to use them.

"Does that hurt? Having them pinned like that?" You tilt your head eyes following the edges of each feather.

Keigo lets out a quiet chuckle, eyeing you from over his shoulder. "A little. But nothing I can't handle. Why, is my baby bird worried about little ole me?"

Your frown turns into a glare and you clear your throat. "So, what exactly can you do with these wings of yours?"

Keigo's mouth twitches into a smirk as he turns back around to face you. "Well, I can fly. And I can also disconnect each feather from my wings and use them individually."

You nod, not wanting to show how impressed you were, knowing he'd make a crack at it. You finish writing down that information before asking your next question. "Now, can you tell me why you are here?"

"Getting down to the nitty-gritty, I see. Well, I was arrested and charged with Drug Trafficking, Forgery and Assault." You look at him, motioning him to continue. He shrugs. "There isn't much else to it. I'm a mafia leader. This shit happens on a daily basis, for years. Just so happened that I eventually got caught, on account of a leak in my group. Fortunately, for me, I use other people to do the killing for me. So that means they couldn't get me with murder." He cocks his head. "Unfortunately, though, trafficking and forgery are also felonies, so. That's why I'm here."

"So you spent your life moving copious amounts of drugs, forging money and assaulting clients who did you wrong?"

Keigo thinks about your words for a moment and nods. "Essentially, yes."

"Alright then." You stand up and bow your head to the mafia leader who was watching you carefully. "I will take my leave, as I have one more inmate to see before the end of my shift." You head towards the door, but pause for a moment. "Oh, and Keigo?" You turn your head to look at him over your shoulder. "Your wings are beautiful."

Keigo's eyes widen and his jaw drops slightly, watching you walk out that door. His face turns bright red after processing your words. He mutters under his breath, "oh, baby bird…"

After shutting the door behind you, you breathe out. Aizawa looks up from his phone. "How'd it go?"

You raise a brow, "what, you weren't watching me through the security cameras like before?"

"Oh, I was," he deadpanned. "But, visually, it didn't look as compromising as the last two visits. The cameras don't pick up audio."

"Well, besides the lack of clothing in the beginning and the incessant flirting, I was pleasantly surprised."

Aizawa looked at his watch. "Now, I think we have time for one more before we have to turn in paperwork and unchain the more dangerous inmates from their beds to give them some room to stretch out." Aizawa flips through the profiles before stopping on one. "How about Amajiki?"

You turn to his profile and scan the words in front of you. "A cannibal, huh. Well that's not something you see every day."

"I think he'd be good to end the day with. Despite him being, well, a cannibal, he's actually extremely reserved and quite timid. I don't think he'd try to hurt you or get close to you. He suffers from borderline personality disorder, as you see." Aizawa looks up from his notes and eyes you. "However, he is a level 10. He may come across as innocent and somewhat angelic, but remember, he is one of the most dangerous criminals in this facility. He has multiple murders under his belt. So just keep that in mind."

You nod your head, slightly bouncing with excitement. This one sounds quite interesting to you. You've never met a cannibal before and this one has a quirk that sounds intriguing. Aizawa sighs before turning away from Hawk's door and heading further down the long hallway. He stops in front of a heavy door and scans you in.

Once you step inside the white room, you furrow your brows, not really noticing anyone. That's when you hear a small whimper and a few muffled, stuttered words coming from the floor next to the bed.

"W-Who are you?"

You lean to the side to see an indigo-haired figure huddled against the wall between the desk and the bed. You notice his body is trembling, only his eyes visible through his bangs, his arms covering the rest of his face. Head tilted, you squat down from a distance and smile.

"Hi there, Amajiki. My name is Y/N. I'm the newest scientist at this facility. I'm here to talk to you and get to know you to help further our findings for a cure. I'd like to be friends, if that's possible." You reply gently. You can tell he's scared out of his mind.

He raises his head up, giving you a full view of his…

Muzzle?

"F-friends?"

Your eyes widen slightly. The bottom half of Amajiki's face, from his nose to under his chin, is completely covered by a silver muzzle. It's strapped around his head and locked in place by a padlock. Your eyes travel down to see his wrists chained together with quirk cancelling cuffs and, as you expected, both of his ankles are chained to the heavy duty bed frame.

"They have you muzzled like that?" You stare in disbelief, slightly angered at the treatment. You understand that he's a known cannibal, but to strap that heavy muzzle around his head on top of chains already weighing him down.

Amajiki nods shyly, "y-yeah. I guess it's because of the whole e-eating people… thing."

You sit yourself down on the floor across from him, your notes in your lap. "Is it uncomfortable?" He nods slowly, his eyes avoiding yours. You give him a small smile. "I'm sorry."

His eyes shoot to yours, confusion flashing through them. "Why are you sorry?"

"It...seems like a lot of you are possibly being mistreated here. I've noticed a few things here and there."

Amajiki's brows furrow. "And why should you care? W-We're criminals."

"True. However, this facility isn't supposed to be judge, jury and executioner. You're entitled to a fair trial, just like everyone else. That includes not being mistreated." Your smile never leaves your face as you look the man in the eyes. "I am not only here to research a cure, but make sure in doing so, it won't harm any of you. It'll be humane, I promise." Amajiki just stares at you with an unreadable expression. You sigh and click your pen. "Do you mind if I ask you some questions, Amajiki?" He shakes his head but stays quiet.

"Can you please state your full name, age and date of birth?"

"U-um. Tamaki Amajiki, 25, March 4th."

"Thank you. And what is your quirk?"

Amajiki hugs his knees tighter. "I-It's called Manifestation. Essentially, whatever I eat and digest, I can manifest as a body part."

Your leg bounces in excitement. "So, if you were to eat, let's say, Takoyaki, you can turn your hand into tentacles?" He nods his head. Your eyes light up. "That is incredible, Amajiki. That's such a powerful quirk!"

Amajiki's eyes widened, a blush spreading across his cheeks that were partially hidden under his muzzle. This is the first time he's ever been thankful to have this thing attached to his face. "U-um, t-thanks."

You let out a soft giggle and continue writing in your notes. "Here's a little bit more of a difficult question, Amajiki. Can you please tell me why you are incarcerated in this facility?"

Amajiki stays quiet, not looking at you. You notice his hesitation. You think for a moment before looking around the room. Amajiki sneaks a glance at you, watching you look around the room. His brows furrow. "W-What are you…"

You finally spot the locations of the camera and move your body so your back was facing it. Ignoring his question, you place your pen down directly in front of you so only Amajiki can see. You furrow your brows in concentration and stick your tongue out as you hover your hand over your pen. To Amajiki's utter shock, the pen starts floating in the air.

"Y-You have a quirk?!"

You nod your head and release the pen from your power. "Yeah, I do. It's nothing fancy like yours, but it is a mutation, nonetheless. Sometimes it's easier to talk to someone who understands more of your situation than you might think. So that's why I wanted to show you." You smile at the man, who is looking at you with pure adoration. "Please, keep this to yourself. I don't know what Aizawa would do if he found out about it." 

"I-I won't tell anyone, I promise."

You giggle and sit back down in your original spot. "Thank you. Now, can you please tell me why you're in this facility?"

He nods his head, still slightly dazed about this new-found information. "I was charged with multiple counts of 1st degree murder a-and…" his voice drops to a whisper, "s-serial cannibalism."

You couldn't help your interest in the subject and started rambling. "Would you be so kind as to explain how this came about? Did you grow up into a family of cannibals or-"

"NO!" He lashes out, causing you to flinch slightly. He winces as your reaction, not intending to scare you. "N-no. Nothing like that. It happened… against my will, so to say?" Amajiki sighs and rests his chin on his arms, not meeting your eyes. "I was one of the only kids in my small town to have been born with a mutation. My parents tried to hide it, tried to hide me. I don't know if it was from fear of people hurting me or fear of everyone judging them for having me."

He blinks a few times before continuing. "The town I lived in was small, a bad side to say the least. Lots of low-lifes and gangs running around. Well, long story short, someone found out about me and what my quirk was. They kidnapped me and…" He trails off. Suddenly, his eyes snapped to yours, an uncomfortable and intense feeling overwhelming you. "They forced me to eat another person, someone with a quirk. They wanted to see if I could turn their power into my own."

He cocks his head and lets out a cackle, still making eye contact with you. "Can you believe that?! It actually worked! So what did they do? They forced me to eat ANOTHER quirk user. They wanted to turn me into an ultimate weapon." Amajiki lets out a strange noise, sounding like a mixture between a guttural sob and a laugh. "Well, the joke was on them in the end. I ended up killing and eating them in the end and escaping. But after that point, something mutated further in my quirk. I couldn't stop craving human flesh." He shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath. "A-And that's why I'm here now."

Your eyes are wide and your breath is heavy. Something inside you feels a sense of panic, looking at the clearly broken man in front of you. It's so much information to take in, you stay quiet for awhile, your body on high alert. Amajiki notices how quiet you are and he opens his eyes. He notices a terrified look on your face and internally panics.

"W-Wait, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I-I'm not going to hurt you." He finally moves out from his huddled form and kneels instead, the sound of chains clinking together snapping you out of it. "I-I would n-never hurt you." He whispers the last part, hoping you wouldn't hear it.

You clear your throat after taking a few deep breaths. "T-Thank you for telling me this, Amajiki. It was really brave of you to relive those experiences." You look at him and notice the fear and concern in his face. Giving him a small smile, you close your notebook. "I'm fine, I promise." You stand up on shaky legs and bow your head. "I need to get going."

Amajiki quickly stands up, making you slightly flinch again, which doesn't go unnoticed by him. "Y-You're leaving already? Will I get to see you again?"

"You will. I'm an employee here now, so I'll be the one to check up on all the inmates and work on everyone's individual sessions." You turn your back and walk to the door. "I'll see you later, Amajiki."

The indigo-haired man watches you walk through his door, longing written across his face. The only thing running through his mind are thoughts of the pretty telekinesis that made his heart race.

Once out the door, Aizawa meets you in the hallway. "How'd it go with the man-eater?"

You scowl at the doctor. "Why do you say things like that? He has a name."

"He's a criminal, Y/N. They're all criminals. Shouldn't matter what we call them." He rolls his eyes. "Just come with me. We have to finish our paperwork before the end of the day."

You grumble under your breath but follow the tired-looking doctor to his office. "You also need to prepare yourself for tomorrow. You will be meeting Kaminari, Midoriya, Shinso, Bakugo, Todoroki, Dabi and Kai. And 5 out of the 7 are level 8 and above."

~~~

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[If your name is bolded, I wasn’t able to tag you]

[free-pancakes]

Kiss the Drummer

Summary: a LeviHan Jazz!AU

Levi, a talented trumpet player famous in the jazz clubs of New York, is struggling with his instrument and feels burnt out—he wonders if he chose the right path in life.

The bassist of his quintet, an old friend named Erwin, invites a quirky new drummer to play with them, who brings a new spark into Levi’s life.

Notes:  Drum "chops” describe a drummer's technical ability, including a large vocabulary of licks, and how freely they express themselves on the instrument. BPM = beats per minute Songs: Giant Steps - John Coltrane

sorry this AU fic is pure self-indulgence and has become much longer than originally intended lol

crossposted to AO3

CHAPTER 1

He licked his lips and pushed them readily against the smooth, silver mouthpiece, ready to hit the first note of the song, Giant Steps. He suppressed his desire to grumble at yet another fast swing tune.

He stared out into the audience, peering at the people sitting around the tables of the club. Their faces were slightly lit from the reflection of the stage lights, wearing expressions of both excitement and anticipation. “Just another night of the same old thing,” Levi thought to himself, letting out a soft, exasperated sigh, one only he could hear. His stance conveyed confidence, but his eyes spelled apathy.

He heard snaps on 2 and 4 marking their starting tempo at 289 bpm and Levi quickly puffed warm air into his trumpet.

“One… two… one two three four—“

——

Levi wiped down his trumpet, carefully cleaning the beautiful brass after yet another great performance. He gently placed it in his case, and looked up at himself in the dressing room mirror. He stared blankly at his reflection, noting the tinge of purple beneath his eyes—he knew his body was aching for sleep. It had been restless upon restless night for the past year or so, and he wasn’t completely sure why. He looked down at his trumpet case with both affection and disdain. Maybe... he just wasn’t meant to do this for this long.

He didn’t hate playing, but the truth was, he had simply been good at it all of his life. Quite gifted at it, one would say, and thus he passively let it lead him to success. It was just what it was. He was good at jazz, he was good at trumpet. Naturally he studied it at a top university for jazz performance and joined this famous quintet, and naturally he worked hard to improve his skills. But as any routine would, practice and rehearsals became monotonous, grunt work.

While lost in thought, his eyes trailed over to his small, neat pile of math textbooks at the edge of the dresser.

If anything, he did enjoy jazz theory. It was just math, anyway—circle of fifths, cadence patterns, fancy scales—it all just added up and broke down for any message or feeling you wanted to convey with a melody for your solo, and those tools were simply available in your brain to make it happen—tools to play some straight dirty solos that make you smirk satisfactorily when listening. To Levi, it just made sense, to a lot of other people, he was called “genius”. But after years and years of this, he was burning out and he was quite aware of that. He felt like he was losing his edge, and he was just a machine clunking out music most nights of the week. Again he thought, maybe he just wasn’t meant to do this forever. But what else would pay the bills?

Shaking his head, he let his jumbled thoughts fall away momentarily. He picked up a textbook, and leafed through the pages. He clicked open a ballpoint pen and began adding to his lesson plan for one of his students, a young girl named Sasha. Honestly, she seemed utterly hopeless with math at times, but he was determined to help her at least pass her algebra class. Her little friend Connie on the other hand…well that’s a story for another day, he thought, and chuckled softly to himself. If anything, he did enjoy his side job as a math tutor for the local school system. He didn’t really need the extra pocket money, but something compelled him to keep up with it.

As he jotted down notes, muffled noise of cheering and commotion rocked against the door. Tonight’s gig was Nile’s last performance with them, as he was moving out to the west coast to play with another group and accept a teaching position somewhere out there. Levi didn’t care much for his drumming or his personality for that matter, so he wasn’t particularly sad to see him go, nor was he keen on joining the celebration out in the bar. He yawned and continued finish up writing his lesson plan, as he knew he’d probably have to drive his drunk colleagues home.

——

“Levi! I’m gonna miss you buddy!” Nile exclaimed as he aggressively ruffled Levi’s hair, causing the cowlick he spent every morning trying to gel down to stick straight up embarrassingly at the top of his head. “Yeah, yeah, yeah… good luck Nile.” He shoved him and Mike into a cab, as they lived in the same apartment complex. He turned back into the bar to Erwin smiling drunkenly and Nanaba knocked out cold, sleeping soundly as she sat with her head down on a table. Levi grumbled and picked up Nanaba’s saxophone case to haul into the trunk of his car. He returned to pick up Nanaba and carried her on his back, and Erwin walked with them to Levi’s car.

“Hey Levi, Our new drummer is flying in tomorrow. I told her I’d come and pick her up from the airport at 7am.”

Levi looked Erwin up and down with a look of disgust. “In that sorry state, Eyebrows? Tch, go sleep off the hangover tonight, I can go to the airport. What’s her name and what does she look like?”

“Her name’s Hange. She has messy brown hair usually worn up in a ponytail, wears tortoise clubmaster glasses and well… honestly you can’t miss her, I’m sure you’ll find her right away.”

“Okay. So why’d we need to bring in a completely new drummer anyway? Couldn’t we have just brought in Moblit?”

“Ah you know his style doesn’t fit ours as well, plus he’s doing well with his band right now. Don’t worry, Hange and I played together all 4 years of college together, she’s got chops. Plus, I think Hange will probably bring in the change we need. Your playing’s gone a bit stale... hasn’t it, Levi?”

“Stale?! Pfft you’re just drunk,” Levi muttered, irritated as Erwin raised his eyebrows at him. They arrived at their apartment complex and Levi begrudgingly unlocked the car doors, gently woke Nanaba, and the three of them walked up to their floor. Erwin fumbled with his keys, and Levi snatched it out of his hands, frustrated at how long it was taking him. Erwin chuckled, and Levi scrunched up his nose at the stench of alcohol in his breath. As soon as the door opened, Nanaba immediately ran to the bathroom, retching into the toilet.

“I got her,” Erwin laughed. “Go to bed, Levi, you’re the one getting up early. Flight info’s next to the door.”

Levi nodded, turned into his room, and plopped down on the bed. He stared at the ceiling, and wondered how much longer he’d keep playing, or more like, how soon he’d quit. If this Hange person was as annoying as Nile, well… he probably wouldn’t hold out much longer.

——

Levi stood with his hands in his pockets, eyes peeled for this Hange person. He looked at his watch—“Maybe she was still waiting on her luggage,” he thought. He walked over to the small cafe to his left, and waited in line, squinting for any decent teas on the menu. Before he could decide, he suddenly heard a small yelp, and something shoved right into his chest, feeling piping hot coffee running down his white, longsleeve shirt. Before he could yell obscenities at the moron who just ruined one of his favorite shirts, he was met with frantic apologizes.

“I’m so so sorry! Oh my goodness it was a complete accident, can I get you a drink to make up for it? Man I am so clumsy...oh! Maybe you can wear one of my shirts I have here, free of charge! Or I could just—“

He looked up in the middle of incessant rambling to see the culprit—a tall brunette, hair messily tied up in a bun, wearing tortoise clubmaster glasses, and a bright yellow coat.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Levi thought to himself. He looked down to see a large black cymbal case and a stick bag with yarn mallets and drumsticks poking out of it.

—I could just buy you a new shirt! Oh, how bout—“

Levi was livid—this clown was potentially going to be playing gigs with them over the next year? The coffee stained fabric was sticking uncomfortably to his skin and he felt the biggest headache coming on—all this pain just from one person. He reached up and gently placed his hand over her mouth to physically stop her chattering.

“Is your name, Hange?”

She nodded, Levi’s hand still covering her mouth.

“You’re Erwin’s friend?”

She nodded again, her eyes lighting up at the name, Levi feeling her lips forming a smile under his palm.

“Okay, I’m taking you back to our apartment.”

Levi reached for her bags to carry them, but was interrupted.

“Wait—the least I can do is give you the extra shirt I have in my backpack so you can change out of your soiled one,” she said softly. She reached in her bag, and pulled out the shirt and Levi felt his eye twitch in annoyance at the words printed on its front. He sighed, and debated sitting in his wet shirt, but it seemed like he didn’t have much choice—he’d have to wear it.

——

Levi blinked his eyes open. He felt oddly rested, but one thing was strange—he was sitting up, and he felt something unusually heavy on his shoulder.

“What the—“

He looked to the side and saw a mess of brown hair immediately to his right, heard the soft sound of snoring, and felt… something wet on his arm? He looked down and grimaced. “Drool. She’s drooling. On my goddamn arm.”

He looked around for some kind of napkin. He didn’t remember falling asleep, let alone letting this absolute stranger curl up against him. How in the world did he let his guard down this far?

He stared blankly at Hange and thought, “What a mess—what was Erwin thinking? We’ve known each other for less than 5 hours, and she seems to have already made herself right at home. I haven’t even confirmed whether she was good enough to play with us, yet.” He tried to shift out from underneath Hange, but before he could wriggle is way out—

“Kiss the drummer?”

Erwin and Nanaba stood before Levi, both with hair in a complete mess, having just woken up from sleeping off their hangovers. Smirking and holding back laughter, they stared at the scene—Levi wearing an oversized t-shirt with the words “Kiss the Drummer” in bold letters plastered across his chest, along with Hange sleeping quite cozily on his shoulder, her glasses held gently between his fingers. Levi tried covering up the words and scowled at his two friends.

“Laugh it up,” he muttered. “What is this, Erwin? She’s clearly made herself at home already—and we haven’t even gotten to play together yet.”

“Relax, Levi, she’s a great musician. And look, she likes you!”

Levi grimaced at Hange draped over his shoulder.

“Hmph, I still have to hear her play and have my opinion considered. We all get a vote yknow…”

Over their hushed voices, Hange shifted groggily towards all of them and rubbed her eyes. “Erwin?”

Hange’s eyes lit up immediately in recognition, shoving Levi back further into the couch as she jumped up to wrap Erwin in her embrace, excited to finally be reunited with her friend after so many years.

After a few minutes of catching up, Erwin smiled brightly. “Yes, we can take you around the city a bit. Rehearsal’s not til this evening anyway—we did have a gig lined up last minute for the middle of this week if you were comfortable with that, Hange.”

“Of course I’d be down to do that! I—“

“Oi. Like I said, we still vote if you get to play with our group officially. Don’t be late to rehearsal tonight.” Levi then slowly stood up and walked quietly towards his room.

“Don’t mind him, he’s just being strict about our technical audition policy,’ Erwin reassured. He and Nanaba quickly darted for their rooms to ready themselves to take Hange sightseeing for a little while and introduce her to the city, leaving her standing alone in the middle of their living room. Her eyes trailed after Levi, curious about his calm yet sad energy. She felt that she saw through that aura, noticing every little kind gesture he made towards her from the time they met at the airport to the moment they fell asleep on the couch. Hange was determined to get him to show that side of himself a little more. As he turned to grab the door behind him, she smiled at him, and was quickly met with a scowl and the slam of his bedroom door in her face. Seemed it might take some more effort to get through to him than she originally thought.

[hermionemonica]

The Road to Us, and Everything in Between: Chapter 2

(This is a no magic AU. There is no existence of the Miraculous or the superheroes in this universe.)

AO3 | Chapter 1 | Chapter 3 

As time went on, Marinette felt distances creeping between her and Nathaniel. They still talked to each other over calls, texting and social media, and even met up with each other every once in a while. But all that grew more and more seldom. And for Marinette, this felt different. Of course, her affections for Nathaniel still remained unchanged, but it felt kind of liberating to not have his presence constantly looming over her life. And with the alone time Marinette now had away from Nathaniel, she found herself constantly rethinking her life and decisions. About what she chose, about what could have been.

Marinette had always had a habit of talking to herself. Now every time she felt herself falling into dejection, she would whisper to herself over and over, “I chose this. This is my life now. This is what my life will be from now.” That did wonders to push the fears and insecurities to the back of her mind.  

But as days passed, it started to get harder and harder. After all, it is an inexplicable pain to see the one you love right in front of you, be with them, all the time knowing that they'll never be yours. Being around him didn’t do anything to help her move on from him, even if she tried.  

Gradually, the secrets and the pretences began to take a toll on her. And with the new university and her fashion courses, it was all too much for her. She felt herself giving in to the pressure. Designing or baking did not work their therapy on her anymore. And the first thing she did when things started getting bad was slowly cut off Nathaniel. Not that she wanted to. It was just she couldn't trust herself to not explode in front of him. And after everything the boy had been through, the last thing he'd want was the only person he trusted to go off on her. So the only solution that she saw was to stay away from him. Only, she could not come up with an appropriate excuse. The poor boy kept asking her what was wrong, but Marinette would say she was fine. Until one day she snapped.  

Marinette was having a particularly rough day, after she had accidentally dropped her sketchbook, which held her designs that she had been working so hard on, right into the waters of the Seine. She had retrieved them, of course, but her work of weeks was ruined. She had shut herself in her room and decided to bury herself in her designs till she redrew them. It probably wouldn’t be as perfect as the originals, but she needed to submit something the next day to pass the class.

Unfortunately, Nathaniel chose that very evening to call her. Marinette ignored his calls and messages for a while, till the alert sounds were getting on her nerves. She finally picked up the phone and asked, “What is it, Nate?”  

If she sounded grumpy or bitter, Nathaniel obviously did not notice it as he went on a ramble about how a cute guy on the subway had complimented him on his blazer.  

“And this is what was so important that you called me for like, 17 times?” Marinette cut him off mid-rant.  

That was when it registered in Nathaniel's mind. “Uh, I thought you'd like to know,” Nathaniel spoke nervously.  

“Maybe I would, but not everyone necessarily has the time for this! Take the hint when I wasn't answering your calls or replying to your texts.” Marinette replied acidly.  

“What is wrong Mari?” Nathaniel sounded concerned.  

“Why does something have to be wrong?” Marinette was beginning to lose her temper. “It just happens that you don't seem to realise that some people might have more important stuff going on than just a random guy complimenting you on your clothes!”  

When there had come no reply from the other end, Marinette quickly disconnected the call and switched her phone off. She had too much on her hands at the moment.  

Marinette had fallen asleep at her table, sometime in the middle of the night. In the wee hours of the morning, she woke up to find a string of messages from Nathaniel, which he had sent right after the phone call the previous night.  

“So, this is it? I... I don't matter anymore? It’s okay, Marinette, I get it. I was just an unnecessary burden that you were carrying around although you didn't have to. This had to end sometime, right? After all, we both know very well that I'll never be able to give you what you want. I am only holding you back from everything that you could have, everything that you deserve. I'm sorry for everything Mari, I hope you can forgive me. Take care Marinette, and be happy. I promise I won't bother you anymore. Goodbye.”  

Marinette had not seen this coming. She couldn't deny that she had been a bit too harsh in her words the previous night, but was it that bad? Had she made it sound like she didn't want Nathaniel to be around her? She tried to remember what exactly she had said, but to her anguish, all of it was a blur. In exasperation, she kicked against the side of her desk, only to wince back in pain immediately afterwards. Surely, the voice in her head kept saying, this can't be happening. Nathaniel wouldn't just leave just because Marinette had said some harsh words, right? Their relationship was too above that, of course! After everything they had been through together, a little miscommunication couldn't possibly be what would break it! Over and over she read Nathaniel's texts, trying to make something out of it, something less painful. She tried to read between the lines, desperately trying to convince herself that it wasn't happening.  

The only reason she dragged herself out of her house an hour later was because she had to submit the designs that day. And the only reason she had left her phone without replying to Nathaniel was because she was scared that she might mess it up further.  

Three agonising hours later, Marinette sat in the cafeteria. Anger coursed through her. Anger at Nate, anger at herself, anger at the stupid deadline! As she desperately tried to reign in her temper, because that was what had caused the entire mess in the first place, she found herself regretting her decision to leave her phone at home. At least she could have called Alya and talked to her. At one point of time, Marinette had been glad that no one from her old school was in the same university as her, because then she could put everything behind her and start her life without the lies. It didn’t seem that convenient anymore. She wished she could talk to someone, anyone, right now. But since there was no way to do that, she went back to sipping on her iced tea to soothe her nerves.  

“Are you okay?” said a voice from behind Marinette, as a hand was laid on her shoulder.  

Before Marinette could turn around, the intruder came into her range of vision as he seated himself at her table.  

It was Adrien, and he was looking at her with concern in his emerald hands. Did she really look that terrible? Marinette asked herself. More importantly, what could she answer to Adrien, when he didn't even know anything about Nathaniel? But then again, she was stuck in the university for at least two more hours, without a phone and no one but Adrien to talk to. Adrien was the only friend she had for now, and Marinette felt she would combust from the stress if she didn't talk sometime soon. Sure, once she figured out how to begin.  

“It's umm... you know, about this boy,” she struggled through her words.  

Immediately, Adrien perked up. “Boy? Crush? Ex? Boyfriend?”  

Marinette felt a smile creep up onto her face in spite of herself. “Let's not use any labels, okay? It’s a bit too complicated for that,” she clarified.  

Adrien wiped the silly grin off his face and looked on with interest, silently urging her to continue.  

“So we had kind of an argument last night, and I may have been a bit rude to him. In my defence though, I was stressed beyond limits. And this morning, I woke up to a bunch of texts from him, saying that... that,” Marinette faltered. How do you put that into words?  

Luckily, Adrien seemed to have understood what she was trying to say. “That he’s leaving you for good,” Adrien offered.  

“Exactly,” explained Marinette. “Except that I meant nothing like that and he took it all the wrong way and he thinks I want to get rid of him and oh so I feel so angry at him right now because after all this time how could he misunderstand such a simple thing and I-”  

“Woah there,” Adrien interrupted. “Slow down. Maybe drink a bit more of that drink you've got there.”  

“Iced tea,” murmured Marinette, “soothes my nerves.”  

That was when she realised that her hands were shaking so badly that she could not even hold the glass in her hand. And on the top of that, a pounding began in her head.  

As she clutched her head in her hands, Adrien reached over. “Hey, are you okay? Do you need anything?” he asked.  

But Marinette could not hear him over the incessant buzzing in her ears. Breathing had never felt so difficult, it was as if something was blocking her trachea.  

Adrien could see Marinette gasping for breath, and shaking uncontrollably, and it scared him. What was happening to this girl? It took him a moment to snap out of his fixation, but then he got up and picked Marinette up in his arms, rushing to the nurse's office, ignoring all the odd looks he could feel on him in the corridors.  

The nurse injected a mild tranquillizer into Marinette's blood. It took effect pretty soon, and soon Marinette had drifted off into a dreamless slumber.  

“It looks like your friend over here has had an anxiety attack,” the nurse explained to Adrien. “Is she under medications for such attacks?”  

Adrien simply looked on with bewilderment.  

Either he is too stressed out to comprehend my words right now, thought the nurse, or he seriously has never heard of an anxiety attack. Deciding on the former, she went on, more gently, “Has she ever had spells like this before?”  

Adrien looked down, his expression guilty. “I-I don't know. I don't spend much time with her.”  

The nurse shook her head. “Well, I am guessing by how freaked out she was when you brought her in that she is as unacquainted with these attacks as you are, young man. Whatever be it, I need to contact her parents. Marinette Dupain-Cheng, you said?” The nurse asked as she scrolled through the student records on her computer.  

Adrien nodded.  

“I assure you that your friend will be okay, you may take your leave if you have classes you need to be at now.”  

Adrien took a glance at his watch. His class had started fifteen minutes ago. Since he was late anyway...  

“No,” he confidently lied to the nurse. “I don't have any classes for another hour.”  

“Fine,” obliged the nurse. “Do keep the young lady company while I go call up her parents.” Adrien silently sank down on the edge of the bed Marinette was asleep on. As he stared at her face, he noticed how ill she looked. The colour had faded from her cheeks, and dark bags hung under her eyes. What could have been so terrible that upset this amazing girl like this?  

Marinette's parents came in some time later. Adrien noticed the stark difference in their appearances. While Marinette's mother, who looked and dressed Chinese, was a small woman like her daughter, Marinette's father could aptly be called a giant of a man. They seemed like very nice people, by the way they talked to the nurse. Mrs Cheng assured the nurse that her daughter did not have any history of anxiety attacks. In that case, the nurse advised them, they should get their daughter a professional check-up at the earliest. They thanked the woman for her help and turned to leave.  

As Mrs Cheng left the room with her daughter leaning onto her, still not quite awake, Mr Dupain stopped at the door. He turned to look at Adrien standing there, and Adrien couldn't help but be intimidated. But Mr Dupain had the kindest of expressions on his face as he grabbed Adrien's hand and firmly shook it. “Thank you for taking care of my little girl,” he whispered gratefully.  

Adrien was surprised to know that the huge man could speak in so low a voice. “It was a pleasure,” he smiled in acknowledgement.  

After he left, Adrien wondered if he had even done anything that special to receive such warm gratitude. “Taking care of” Mr Dupain had said. Funny, thought Adrien, for anyone would probably have done the same if a friend went through something like that in front of them. Nevertheless, Adrien decided that the Dupain-Chengs were probably affectionate people by blood.  

[ablackmoonrises]

Hogwarts for troubled youth Chapter 1, in which Moony can’t keep a Secret

[Posting here while I’m working on it, I won’t post to Ao3 before I’ve written a couple more chapters and so on] Remus has his DID under control. As long as it’s just him and Moony, they’ll manage, and the Wolf can howl all he wants, it won’t get to Anna.

Sirius knows a thing or two about gaps in memory, but when he falls for the easy-going Moony he’s not sure if he’s prepared to deal with Moony’s moody twin Remus, much less a little girl or a violently self-injurious Wolf.

Meanwhile James just wants to start his transition already, but the autism diagnosis that helped him finally make sense of who he is, now seems to prevent the one thing he wants more than even Lily’s attention: To get on Testosterone.

“I’m not Remus.” The words leave Moony’s mouth before they have a chance to get a hold of them. They tumble out of them, spilling all over the pretty new boy with the long black hair.

“Okay?” Sirius says, a question hidden in the confirmation, and Moony wants to punch themself hard. Instead they flash a bright smile at Sirius.

Moony would have been lying if they said they weren’t interested in the new boy. He was not the typical candidate for Hogwarts, rumour had it his parents were loaded and very much still alive. The pale dark-haired boy seemed intent to blend into the shadows, a silent observer with large grey eyes, following the comings and goings of other children from dark corners.

Moony would catch themself staring, losing track of James’ incessant blabbering, as the new boy – Sirius, Moony would remind themself – made his way to a new corner.

“Well you know..” Moony says, pulling back a bit. “I just like to be called Moony. Sometimes.”

Moony had come into existence again the night prior, casually opening his phone to check his conversation with Remus.

“We got to walk the dog with the new boy tomorrow”, it read, and Moony’s heart had started to race. “If I’m not there.. please don’t fuck it up. He seems cute.”

“That’s cool,” Sirius responds, tilting his head slightly as if trying to figure out why Moony is telling him this. Moony isn’t so sure either. They walk in silence, the big black dog panting at the end of its leash. Sirius’ hand is surprisingly steady as he’s pulled along.

“So… what’s the deal with this place?” Sirius asks finally, after an extended period of silence. “What do they do?”

Moony looks at Sirius and grins, a wicked smile replacing their calm exterior for a moment. “Well – it’s mostly a place to fatten up children before feeding us to the Witch,” they explain.

Sirius looks doubtful. “a Witch?” he asks, as if that’s the part that doesn’t make sense. Moony nods enthusiastically. “Yep! Well.. I believe her official title is doctor of psychology, but I call her the Witchdoctor.”

“And she’s going to eat us?” Sirius is somehow managing to lift one eyebrow, which is impressive and infuriatingly attractive.

“Yeah – just – gobble gobble. It’s a whole thing.” Moony shrugs. “She’s gonna spit ya out again, no worries, but each time she chews out another piece of your soul.”

“Well in that case I guess I won’t stay long, it’s not like I have a soul to begin with,” Sirius says with downcast eyes.

“Well aren’t you the cheerful one..” Moony comments, turning around to walk backwards while talking. “…Anyways, I’m sure you know what this place is on paper?” they ask, and almost trip over a bush. Maybe walking backwards isn’t as elegant a manoeuvre as they had hoped.

“It’s like.. a correctional facility?” Sirius says it like a question. “Like a mix of a boarding school and an orphanage..?”

“Ding ding ding!” Moony says cheerfully. “Less correctional facility, more treatment facility, I suppose?” Moony plasters a wide grin on his face, making sure to edge it far enough to be at least mildly unnerving. “In other words.. It’s a place for crazy people!”

“But I’m not crazy,” Sirius says, sounding surprisingly calm. Most people were more adamant when defending their sanity.

“Well that’s too bad..” Moony sighs. “You know what they say? All the best people are.”

“I’m not crazy…” Sirius repeats, and there’s that delicious level of desperate insecurity that makes Moony feel better about themself. “My family’s crazy though,” he says after a while. “And they’re not exactly good people.”

Moony doesn’t have a good comeback to that, partially because Wolf starts howling in his head, and partially because… well. Dude has a point.

They take the last of the round in silence, and Moony expects that to be the end of it. There’s a weird tension building in the air all the while, and Moony isn’t sure what to make of it. They hand the fluffy therapy dog back to Hagrid, and stand in the cold January weather for a moment, as if sizing each other up.

“…You don’t speak much do you?” Moony says finally, breaking the silence. Sirius shrugs.

“I speak when I have things to say.”

Fuck, this dude’s one-liner game is on point. Moony needs to get their head in the game.

“So… Guess I’ll go back to my room.” Moony says, and something flashes through Sirius’ eyes. The boy looks almost lost for a moment.

“Are you…” Moony begins, but stops themself. Sirius shakes his head, and Moony isn’t sure what they were asking or what Sirius is responding to at this point. This’ll be fun to analyse in the wee hours..

“So if you’re bored, you can come up.” Moony says, surprising even themself. Sirius’ eyes open a tad too much, before he schools his expression back into something more neutral.

“Sure.”

Moony shares their room with a depressed gremlin, a little girl and a rampaging Wolf. Usually they would have taken this under consideration and not have invited a total stranger, but apparently it’s just one of those days. And hey! Remus did tell Moony to be nice, or something to that effect.

To his credit, Sirius does not comment on the crayons littering the floor, nor the general state of disarray in Moony and Company’s room. Moony shoves some school papers off the bed, and gestures for Sirius to take a seat.

“So uh,, are you a tea drinker?” Moony asks lamely, feeling suddenly incredibly awkward about the presence of the posh boy in his crappy room.

“Why not,” Sirius answers fluidly, and god damn it, why is this motherfucker being so smooth all of a sudden? Moony nods and turns to the small kitchen in the other end of the room. They’re quiet while the water comes to a boil, partially because Moony honestly thinks there’s a special place in hell reserved for people who try to have conversation over the sound of a kettle. Like, who even does that?

As a result the silence is long and sticky, and Moony’s brain is working on overdrive. They can feel Sirius’ eyes on their back as they pour the water into two teacups. Moony takes a deep breath before turning around. They place the two cups on the bedside table, and stand awkwardly hovering for a moment, before slamming their ass down into the bed.

-say something- flashes through Moony’s mind. -you invited him here – say something –

Moony regrets not offering Sirius something stronger than tea, to loosen the mood, but then, they don’t want to risk getting in trouble. And who knows if they can trust this new boy yet.

“Why do you prefer Moony?” Sirius asks, slicing through the silence with precision. Moony startles. Damn, that’s right, he told Sirius that.

“I just.. sometimes Moony feels more right.” They say, it’s not a lie, not exactly. “I mean.. Moony is like..” they stop. “It’s just a joke since Remus Lupin sounds pretty fucking lunar, and I am a lunatic, so..” Moony laughs, half-lies flowing easily from their tongue. Okay, so Moony doesn’t usually go around claiming their own name, since everyone hear knows them all as Remus, but so what? No harm, no foul.

Moony is desperate to not be Remus.

“You keep referencing being insane,” Sirius says. “What’s that all about?”

Direct. Moony can appreciate that. But then, most people don’t ask and for a moment Moony is struggling.

“Oh you know.. the usual. When I was in the loony bin they called me loony loopy lupin, if that tells you anything..” they laugh. “You know, just… I have….” They stop, biting their lip for a second, feeling suddenly unsure how to proceed. Only James and some staff knows about their DID, and Remus is going to kill them all if Moony lets it slip to this practical stranger.

Maybe it’s Sirius’ calm inquisitory gaze. Maybe it’s the joint Moony smoked before going on their walk. Maybe … Just maybe.. Moony is getting pretty fucking tired of living the life of someone else.

“Okay so.. I basically have. Or I am. Yeah. I’m like…” Moony is aware they’re rambling, but they can’t stop themself. They’re starting to feel distant as the world starts to fade around them.

They come back to themself, realizing with horror that they’re still talking. “….so yea that’s like I’m the keykeeper and the princess is in the castle and Remus is the gate but he can’t open without the key and..” Moony stops abruptly, staring ahead of themself. “What?”

Sirius is looking somewhere between concerned and confused. Fuck. Moony hates when this happens. Also if they’re starting to black out, chances are Remus will be back soon, or worse, someone else. Time to get the witness out of there.

“…Right.” Sirius says, tilting his head. Moony hopes his darker skin-color hides his blush.

“So you said this princess is guarded by the big bad wolf,” Sirius says and Moony inwardly flinches as the Wolf starts clawing at its prison.  “But if the princess is guarded by a wolf, why do you need to have a key?”

“Uh…” Moony says, desperately trying to remember and make sense of whatever conversation they must have been having. After a moment they give up and let out a big sigh.

“Look mate,” Moony says. “This is gonna sound pretty fucking stupid, but if you wanna spend any amount of time with me you gotta know that I have an… incredibly shit memory.” They shrug in what they hope is a nonchalant manner. “I kind of blanked out on that whole conversation.. So your guess is as good as mine.”

Sirius nods thoughtfully. “Ok Moony,” he says. Then, terrifyingly, he adds: “How will I know when I meet Remus?” Moony’s eyes widen, and they almost drop the teacup they hadn’t been aware they were holding.

“Re-Remus..?” they ask. Fuck. They’ve really done it now. Moony is starting to sweat with panic. “I-I’m Remus..” The wolf is going to kill me – the wolf is going to kill me – the wolf is – no one can know – no one can know – our secret – our secret – secret – you are the gatekeeper; act it!

“Moony – “ Sirius is way too close now, he’s practically crowding them, and Moony wants to push him away but instead they just flinch and crawl awkwardly back unto the bed. The last of the tea drips into the sheets from the discarded cup.

- Anna stares at the stranger with the black hair and apologetic look on his face. She’s in a bed, something warm has soaked through her pants and the stranger is backing away, but she’s no fool and she’s going to scream bloody murder and –

Remus tends to blink into existence at the most inopportune moments. This time he comes to with a deep-seated sense of dread, like something is seriously wrong. For a moment he thinks he might be wrong. He’s just in bed, but it doesn’t take long for the unease to settle completely over him, as he recognizes the teacup bleeding into the bed. He looks up, and there, by the door, hangs a dark blue scarf. He’s seen this scarf before. It belongs to the cute new guy, Sirius. Remus pushes himself out of bed, his body is hurting in a dull ache that tells him Moony hasn’t been as careful with it as he ought to be. Not like Remus minds too much, the pain is just another reminder of his broken fucked up life.

Moony hasn’t left any notes, and Remus’ only clue is the blue scarf that hangs on the bed, and a low growl in his inner ear.

Whatever happened… the Wolf is not pleased.

[reddie-fangirl24]

Eddie, The Patient Chapter 1     (A Reddie Fanfiction)

Note: Hi all, this is a story that is based on a chapter in one of Beverly Cleary’s books, Ramona. And it is also based on another fanfic I wrote for another fandom I am in. Because I am such a Reddie fanatic, I couldn’t get this scenario out of my head. I cannot wait for you guys to read it. More chapters are soon to come. Enjoy!

Waking up with the most horrible ache in his cranium, Eddie clutched at his stomach, groaning. Slowly sitting up from the pillows, Eddie turned off the incessant beeping from the alarm clock sitting on the table next to his side of the bed. That irritating noise made his head feel worse like a bowling ball was crushing it. And his stomach churned like a boat sailing through the sea.

He didn’t have the energy to get out of bed. There was no way he was going to be able to go to work like this today. It was best to stay home, rest and... no. A first-year teacher like himself calling out because of some little illness? That would look terrible on his report! 

Don’t overreact Eddie, you know it’s all in your head. And you know what happens to you when you think like that! Yes, Myra was right. But, his mother always thought the worse whenever Eddie sniffled or coughed.

Denying that he was sick and that this was something that would pass, Eddie dragged himself out of bed, getting out of his comfortable pajamas, and hardly cared about what he dressed in for the day. Seeing was a hard enough task, cringing from the bright sun shining through the windows. 

Walking into the kitchen felt as if he were carrying an elephant over his shoulders. Pouring himself a bowl of cheerios, Eddie turned his nose up at the bowl of cheerios, Eddie turned his nose up at the unappetizing meal floating in the milk. Only eating three unwanted spoonfuls, Eddie felt as if he wanted to heave. Even holding a spoon felt like too much of an effort.

Oh no. That student who was sick on Monday that he had to escort to the nurse. It was in the rule book that no student should ever walk to the nurse’s office alone. Luckily (Well, not for them) his student threw up right when he showed up. After work, Eddy went home and scrubbed his body until his skin was red that night. Apparently, it didn’t work. 

No, no! Don’t think like that! I’m not sick! It’s all in your head!

“What the hell is the matter with you, you piece of shit?!”

For a moment, Eddie believed that his husband was shouting at him. His mind was so muddled that he didn’t even notice that the other end of the bed was empty that morning. Due to Richie’s career he hardly ever had to work during the day. Today, however, he must have had rehearsals or a meet to attend to.

Turning his head ever so slightly, Eddie just glimpsed Richie’s head from out the kitchen window. Why was there a black sludge mark on his face? He was struggling to push something out of the driveway. Was it heard of cows? Making out thick black smoke, Eddie could only guess that it was the car.

Oh no. Eddie kept telling Richie that it was time for a new car, but he wouldn’t listen. Oh, just thinking about the situation worsened his stomach. Maybe if he stayed as stiff as a statue he’d feel better. The more he moved, he felt worse.

“Hey, Steve, It’s Richie.” He must have been talking on the phone to his manager. “Listen, I’m having car troubles. No, no, no I will be in, I just need to take my car into a shop so they can have a look... Yeah I know we’re rehearsing for tonight’s big show by eleven. I will be there! I’m just going to take my car in and then... wait, what? I thought we weren’t doing that segment. I haven’t even rehearsed that part of the show!”

Smacking his lips together to try and get rid of that fermenting taste, Eddie groaned. He couldn’t tell Richie about how he was feeling. He was under enough stress as it was. Due to the life-threatening injury that doctors called a miracle he even lived five years ago, Eddie’s immune system wasn’t as strong. He got sick easily. Not to mention, it took longer to recover compared to how others got better within a quicker timeframe.

Richie had canceled a good number of his events just to take care of him. While that was great, Eddie felt that he was getting in the way of Richie’s career. No, he could never do that. Richie had been talking about this event for weeks. And thinking back to his own job, his boss wouldn’t be happy with him calling out at the last minute. That happened enough times as it was.

Heaving his achy body up from the chair while holding the heavy bowl, walking to the sink felt like a longer walk than normal. Feeling his stomach lurch, Eddie grasped the sink counter breathing in and out of his nose.

“... Yeah, okay, as I said, I will be there! And I will bring my script of suggestions!”

Richie stormed into the house, grumbling to himself. Walking into the kitchen he only just glanced at Eddie standing over by the sink, struggling to keep himself up. He stuffed a banana in his mouth and drank some coffee. Due to the car and scheduling for events, the morning escaped him. 

“I’m not going to have the time to drive you to work, sorry. Steve booked like a zillion interview rehearsals and the fuckin’ car just decided that it didn’t want to back up! You don’t mind walking, do you?”

Oh, please drive me? I can barely stand. “No.” That was the first thing Eddie said all morning. It felt like such an effort to even talk. And it hurt.

“Great. I think I’m working late tonight. I’m going to leave now so I can get the car in and then get over to the studio. You never know how long it could take to hail a taxi in the morning rush,” Richie said. Then he laughed. “Hey, maybe I could get a taxi for free ‘cause I’m, you know, Richie ‘Trashmouth’ Tozier! Do you think that could happen?!”

Turning around, Richie just caught a glimpse of Eddie disappearing around the corner, opening the front door. “Maybe.” And Eddie was gone.

If it weren’t for his phone ringing, it was then that Richie noticed that there wasn’t a smell of toast in the air. And Eddie’s barely-eaten bowl of cheerios was left in the sink without so much of an effort of being cleaned nor being put in the dishwasher as Eddie insisted. Richie lost count on the number of times Eddie chewed him out for leaving dirty dishes in the sink.

Hurrying to catch up with Eddie who was already walking down the last step, Richie struggled to lock the front door trying to keep an eye on Eddie as he half-listened to his manager ramble on. “Yeah, ‘k, cool. No, not cool! Sorry, I was, uh... just hold on a sec... Eddie, are you okay?” he called out.

Hugging himself to keep warm despite the sun shining, Eddie stared back at Richie who was getting smaller the further distance his jello-like legs took him. No, please stop me from going through with this stupid decision. “Yes.”

Was it the smudges on his glasses or did Eddie look sickly pale? And now that he thought about it they didn’t even kiss each other goodbye like they did every morning! Was Eddie made at him for coming home late last night? He was already in bed. And it wasn’t even ten. “Um... okay, I lo- huh, yeah, Steve, I’m still here! Wait, what time? Shoot, I have to get my car in now! Can Barry or whatever that limo guy’s name is come pick me up?”

Trudging along, listening to his stomach making uncomfortable noises, and wanting so badly to go back to bed, Eddie tried to stay positive that he could somehow get through this day.

[1358456]

Review Response, May 19 - 25, 2019

Another week!

Heart #001

1) I love moon's character she seems so shy but will probably kill you if angry it's great!

I wouldn’t say that she’s shy, but more like... well, not overly social? And yes, if she’s mad... hehehe...

Heart #003

1) I had so many things going through my mind while reading is. The first thing was how I compared it with my writing. I can’t help but do that.

I love the way you describe things here and especially how you write Platinum. Go platinum go!

Pearl’s mental anguish is so amusing and this is a good way to use very detailed descriptions. Since Pearl is the one who hyper focuses on Platinum it gives the reader a great image of what Pearl sees, feels and how he views her.

Great reaction from our boy and from our ignorant Platinum. Hahaha Even if she catches him blushing. Shel thinks he caught a cold or something. XD

Wait so he and Dia are competing for Platinum’s affection?! I don’t want their amazing brotherly friendship to get ruined though.

I bet if they ask Platinum who of the two she prefers she will answer both of them are equally important to her.

Nicely done Nicole. If the King was every interested in the work of us mongrels he would agree.

Hehe. I sometimes do that too. Hehe...

I love my Platinum! I pay extra attention and put in extra effort in what she says and what she does. Ehe...

Oh, Pearl. He suffered SO badly in this chapter... But at least he had a very good time, even if he was teased so badly.

Poor oblivious Platinum... so smart, yet so inexperienced and clueless... It’s so cute, though. Max level friend-zoner, this one. “Oh? You appear to be flustered. Is something wrong?” Ah...

People wanted Diamond vs. Pearl. Then people kind of... vanished, so I don’t know what the readers want anymore.

If they ask her that question, she will pick both because she doesn’t understand what that question means. “You two are both my irreplaceable friends!” Double friend zone!

... All... hail... the glorious golden boy...

Heart #004

1) Pearl that's... very devious. But also very clever. But still very devious... Is this gonna be what's gonna tear Diamond and Pearl apart? Because I don't think my poor "heart" (heh) could take that...

Junior Quartet interactions are as cute as ever~ I remember some of this from your short story on tumblr. Poor Y, though I must admit it's pretty satisfying to see White get her revenge, given that she's usually the butt of the joke. Also Platinum dancing at the beginning was too cute...

Now, I wonder, will Diamond have the courage to initiate a conversation about romance with her, or will Platinum need a push from her friends to help figure it out...?

Diamond won’t be happy to see Pearl appearing in the villa all of a sudden. He will see that as sabotage. And poor Platinum will notice the tension, but not understand why.

Hehe. This was mostly in Short Story - The Feast. ... Or should I say, most of that is in this chapter. Hehe. Good old victim White. This time, she gets her revenge!

Diamond probably won’t be initiating such conversation. He seems more like the type to slowly ease his way into her heart, by simply being with her and making her happy. Pearl, on the other hand...

Legacy #002

1) Now that I finally have a day of free time, I'm back to reading this! And... I think this is my favourite chapter so far. I'm a huge sucker for fun interactions and stories involving camping together for some reason.

I really like how Red and Blue actually feel like seniors to their juniors in your stories. A lot of the other fics I've read have them act like they're the same age as the rest of the dexholders (how do you do, fellow kids?) which is just weird and kinda uncomfortable when you consider that they're like 30 in canon now. But in this, they both feel older and more responsible while still retaining their fun personalities and interactions with the others.

More foreshadowing(?) with Y's Zwelious... hmm. I loved the scene between her and Black (a rare duo!), and the rising conflict with her and Blue. Given how torn up Blue is about her feelings for Red, I can't imagine it'll be long until Platinum notices as well, given how smart she is. It makes a lot of sense that Blue would be unwilling to talk about her problems with anybody, given her life of solidarity. She's so used to being on her own that opening up must feel impossible for her, and I hope she gets the chance to learn that everybody needs support from time to time in the future.

... This review is kind of all over the place. I really, really enjoyed this chapter, is what I'm getting at.

It’s always fun to write about friendly camping that does not have any tragedy happening. Pure fun stuff!

Red and Blue are... I think I said 25 in Legacy. I crunched up the age gap between Emerald and the Sinnoh cast, so that puts Platinum at 18? But yeah, they should be behaving much more older than the juniors. Mental maturity and all that. They will have their old traits, but mellowed down a bit. So Red won’t be stupidly reckless, and be much more considerate towards the juniors.

More foreshadowing with Y’s potentially uber-aggressive Dragons. Yep. And Y hanging out with Black is definitely a new one, with more interaction options available. I should explore more of them. And oh, Blue... But this is the time for her to receive the warmth and care that she always longed for! Isn’t that sweeeet?? Hehe...

I really enjoy your reviews, Egg! Same for MelBar’s Destiny reviews, though those haven’t continued yet :( I look forward to seeing more!

Legacy #003

1) It's kind of funny seeing Platinum giving romance advice to Blue, given her own naivety towards Diamond's (and now Pearl's) feeling towards her. Still, it's really good advice, but I can't help but worry that this confession might not go exactly as planned... "Sorry Blue, I don't like you in that way."

I think I said this last chapter but damn the junior trio interactions are cute. I love the fact that they're clearly quite close, yet both Y and White are slightly terrified of Platinum when she's angry (cold Platinum is just the best~). Also White and Y's tendency to bug each other is super cute.

And Platinum appears to be the one in danger. I'm excited. But also nervous. Excited because this means cool action scenes are coming up (flash freeze 'em), but nervous because... Platinum's probably going to suffer quite a bit. The pain of being the author's favourite... And Moon's a target too, huh? Wonder how she'll fair. And if Sun will get every bone in his body broken as collateral damage.

This is an interesting set up. Will the villains use Moon's loyalty to Platinum against her in some way? Will Rotomdex manage to escape just by annoying the crap out of the villains? And I have a feeling that the Sinnoh trio isn't going to get to meet up...

Ah, this review is far too long and ramble-y. I think I also said this last chapter but Legacy is quickly becoming my favourite story of yours. Keep it up!

Yes, of all the people, it’s Platinum to do it. How ironic, isn’t it? Heh. Well, I think she’d be more oblivious about those in love with her, but she’d know how to offer advice to others? It’s... a bit weird, yeah. But still very sweet of her, isn’t it? ... Oh, if the confession fails... oh dear...

Hehe. Love the Junior Trio/Quartet! ... Soon going to be not called “Junior” Trio/Quartet, but hey. White and Y are definitely close to Platinum, but will still get intimidated when she’s angry. Because never anger the ice queen! Hehe. “She’ll turn you into a popsicle if you anger her!” But while White and Y are afraid of Platinum, they are not afraid of each other, and will try to one-up one another and sh*ttalk when possible. Heh. Like true buddies!

Oh, be on the lookout for real cool action scenes with Platinum in the future. Ah... yes. The balance of screentime vs. well-being. Favorites get more screentime and thus suffer more for it! :( And yes, Moon is also a target. But will Sun also suffer? ... Well, it’s Sun. He’ll suffer no matter what he’s doing.

Freaking Rotom Dex and its incessant rambling... At least the villains will have a way of muting that damn thing.

Ehehe... thanks! I look forward to seeing more from you!

Legacy #007

1) Dang. That research team was brutal. I wonder if they're the same people who kidnapped Platinum and Y earlier. More plot is revealed as they took the Rotom pokedex so I wonder what they need with it. Also, I wonder how on Earth that Sun, Moon, and Lillie will survive a burning building and already having their bodies be on fire. If they survive, they can sure take a beating. Then again, as I've seen in all your stories, ALL of the dex holders can take a massive beating and still live.

Hey, you’re back! I think you missed out on Heart so I thought... hm.

Nah, they’re not the same people who kidnapped Platinum and Y. Different teams! Behold the manpower of Team ... well... let’s leave that blank for now. Team Blank!

The Rotom Dex was taken to study the Rotom-to-device interface. It was stated in an earlier chapter. Now, what do they need this for? ... I think it’s possible to piece it together from the loose hints provided, but... let’s also leave that blank for now.

Oh, the boy that was burned was not Sun. Local boy with a box of malasada. Sun is not local to Alola, and doesn’t look like a local, thanks to skin color. Now then. Who would have a box of malasada of all things? Hehe...

And I have said at one point that in order to survive a beating that bad, you’d have to be in the top 5 of my Preference List. Moon is in the top 5. Lillie is not. And the “local boy” is also not. So... ... And I also said that Moon will be set on fire, which burns off her existing attire, thus she gets a new one to match the attire overhaul I gave her. So... the “prophecy” has come true!

Destiny #001

1) So, I started with Destiny like you suggested. And so far, it's been great! And ho boi, there are 45 chapters, but honestly with your work, the more the better. It seems like you put a lot of time and effort into this story, and for that alone I applaud you. Again, grammar is on point, and it is easy to understand what Blue is going through. When one looks, one realizes that all aspects of Blue's life right now is completely shitty. From the berries to the loneliness. You did really excellently with handling that in my opinion. It was just so that one really understood what was happening, but it wasn't forced onto the reader either. Well, I guess in some ways it was, but not in bad ways. It was in a good way, trust me. Onto the plot itself! I must say I am very curious about this newcomer. Peter was his name? Quite plain compared to the rest of the names in the series (tho then again you have names like Daisy and Bill so I guess that's not true). Could he be faking his persona? A plain name, a pleasing personality, randomly saves Blue, and has strong shiny pokémon? I'm not sure whether to trust this guy or not. But I'll set aside my suspicions for once and trust him for now. For now. In any case, I'm really hoping that the other dexholders reach out to Blue, I mean really hoping. I've started praying even. I mean, this poor girl is so lonely and she has such a good heart. In any case, it was a hoy to read and review your pieces! And I greatly appreciate you taking the time and effort (kek I already said that earlier) to write this. Thank youuuuuuuuu!

Hehehe. You certainly have a lot of Destiny chapters to read! I look forward to seeing your reviews! ... Do continue them, please?? :)

Yes, Blue starts off on a very, very low point in her life. Now it’s up to the other Dex Holders to try to lead her to a brighter life!

Ah, “Peter”... a name created from the real life friend who was the inspiration of that character. His ID at the time had “PT” in it, and the first name that came to mind with both “p” and “t” in it was “Peter”, so... there it is. Heh. And I like the simple normal sounding names. Not like... “Officer Bobemon” from the Battle Subway, I think? ... Sheesh. And strong shiny stuff. RNG! RNG!

I greatly look forward to seeing your Destiny progress~! :)

SR #020

1) You should make an alternative ending to sr #20 where they don’t succeed in tricking blue

What was SR #020... oh, Mass Revenge? Ah, that secret camera trick/prank thingy. But where they don’t succeed? Aww. Where’s the fun in that? Hehe...

[goldenbloodorange]

excerpt - The Windup and The Pitch

a sample from my NaNoWriMo project, completed December 2018 - it is currently being beta’d by a friend of mine, but here are two sample chapters introducing two main characters - if you read I am absolutely open to feedback!! 

JENKINS

“You’re one of those lady ballplayers, huh?” The Uber driver, Jed, says with a lower respiratory punctuation as Justina gets in the car.

“Uh, yeah, I am,” Justina says, nodding and smiling. 

She pulls out her phone and checks for any new messages. None yet. 

Fuck, she curses mentally, and looks out the window. The car is going over the Hoan Bridge on 794, heading towards Downtown Milwaukee and Justina sees the gray stretch of Lake Michigan reaching to her right. There are a few boats bobbing aimlessly in the distance and they make a temporary distraction from checking her phone incessantly,.

“What a season you all had this year, oh boy. Now, I wish I would have gone to one of the games!”

“Uh, heh, yeah.” Usually Justina would love to chat with anyone who just wanted to talk baseball, but she is admittedly preoccupied. 

She checks her phone a second time. Nothing.

Jed clears his throat and continues to externalize his thought process. “So uh….you’re...um...I know you, I know who you are. You’re...you’re…” Justina’s 25-foot tall Nike ad is pasted on the side of the building as they drive past; you see her name boldly emblazoned on her Belles uniform as she’s swinging, her side profile looking strong.

Jed means well. He is really trying. Justina doesn’t feel as bad about ignoring him as...he’s not an actual fan.

Justina’s phone finally buzzes. She’s waiting for a text from her agent (and teammate’s sister) Lenore Valenzuela, a lawyer turned sports agent who was almost scarily manipulative and good to have on your side, especially when it came to contract negotiations.

LV: Rumors of buyout are no longer rumors. Want to post for selection? Many MLB teams in the market for a spray hitting outfielder like you.

Justina’s heart stops. If she posts for selection, from the rumors she’s heard she could be drafted by any MLB team. Then what? Marinade in the minor leagues for a few years until the league decides she’s ready?

The pay bump, though. The pay bump.

The highest paid AAGPBL player wasn’t even making nearly what the league minimum in MLB was making - which, in Justina’s opinion, is both sad and to be expected. $535,000 was nothing to sneeze at - plus the luxury of being considered a pro ballplayer in a sport that had denied her participation all her life, and one of the first to finally make baseball a coed sport.

Minor leaguers in the MLB system were still paid like crap; not to mention the prospects of a player from this league posting were admittedly not great. Going from making not-so-great money...to not-so-great money...to possibly making the big bucks was not necessarily guaranteed.

“I played baseball as a kid,” Jed interjects. “They never let girls play with us.”

Justina nods politely at him through the rear view mirror. Though she always had a natural quick reflex when it came to fielding and hitting, Justina grew up being turned away from countless Little League teams. She eventually found a team that accepted her, but her family had to move from Mississippi to the Milwaukee suburbs as her father became unemployed and needed to move for work; he had a connection working in the food processing industry.

Jed rambles on. “My old man always said I’d get a college scholarship if I just practiced more.”

The more time Justina’s dad spent making sausage (he still works at the Klements factory off I-94), the less time he had to help Justina develop her swing. So she watched highlight reels and clinic videos on YouTube on the computers at the Milwaukee Public Library. Emulated the swings of some of her favorite hitters. Frank Thomas. Chipper Jones. Derek Jeter. 

And she’d visit the cages after school to put her theories into test.

She’d get weird looks since it was mostly packs of mostly white teenage boys trying to put in cage time for high school ball, but once they saw her hit, they’d ask who she was played for, and the answer was always the same:

Myself. 

It was the same deal in college; denied entry on the baseball team, Justina found herself at the cages, again with the same questions being asked. She found acceptance on the UW-Milwaukee intramural baseball team, which is where she met Quinn Braxton.

“But anyway, it’s awesome that you girls are playing ball. Always thought Milwaukee would get a WNBA team before a women’s baseball team, but hey, whatever.”

Justina’s phone buzzes again, and her head jerks from the polite smiling to her lap.

LV: You ready to make history??????

The Uber rounds the corner of Water Street. A couple of the girls are already on the corner, punching each other’s shoulders and acting like the inseparable group this team really was. Bridget McAfee. Quinn Braxton. CJ Willis. Maddie McCarthy.

Her sisters in arms, runs, hits, and errors. She’d miss them, yes, but there was a whole other frontier to explore, and she was just learning what exactly she was capable of.

Hell yes, Justina types, and immediately hits send.

BRAXTON

Last season’s Defensive Player of the Year, (with a 13-vote-margin) Quinn Braxton punches pitcher Maddie McCarthy in the arm for making the twelfth deez nuts joke in the course of ten minutes. Quinn messes with her equilibrium and Maddie nearly falls over.

“Fuck, Quinn, I’ll stop,” she says, laughing, grabbing onto a parking meter. It feels like they haven’t been apart for a month. It feels like no one’s ever left Milwaukee.

Before anything else can transpire, Justina Jenkins gets out of the backseat of what might be an Uber or Lyft Cadillac Escalade, dripping from head to toe as usual, sneaking a few salon appointments in between the last out of the Women’s World Series and this meeting. Her second or third Balenciaga bag rests on her right arm.

Willis snorts a bit. “We put the reservation in under your name, that okay? It’s $10 a minute for every minute you’re late.”

“Hi mom,” Quinn says, shoving her hands into her Nordstrom Rack camo jeans.

“Hello, darling,” Justina replies. She looks at her three teammates. “Well? I didn’t mean to interrupt what y’all were doing?”

“You’re never interrupting,” McAfee comes rushing towards Justina, crushing her in a giant hug. She smells distinctly like fabric softener and dry shampoo. McAfee is 6’1” barefoot and gives some of the best embraces in all of baseball. Willis and McCarthy follow suit, and before everyone knows it, the Belles superstar outfielder and team captain is wrapped in a crushing hug.

Quinn stands, pretending to be annoyed, arms folded and rolls her eyes. “Like y’all ain’t hug enough during the damn season.”

Justina pushes the other girls away and pulls Quinn into her own personal hug. “Bitch,” she says.

Quinn holds her at arm’s length away. “No Cabo for you, slugger? If it were up to me, my ass would be out of….here.”

It’s not that Quinn hates Milwaukee. She’s actually grown to love it. She grew up here, not far away in a modest home with her mom and twin brother Quincy, off National Avenue.

Quinn and Quincy both played on the high school baseball team, until he had a seizure and died right there in the gymnasium of their high school, in the middle of a warm up before practice. Heart failure, they said. Quinn had heart surgery as a child due to arrhythmia, only to see her brother’s own heart fail right in front of her.

It was too much for Quinn; even with the support from coaches and incessant counseling, she eventually resigned from the team. She didn’t dare pick up a baseball bat again until she met Justina Jenkins whom she met in an Early American Literature class at UW-Milwaukee, three years later.

Justina noticed the Ken Griffey Jr. Trapper Keeper Quinn must have found on eBay, because it was in perfect condition, and no one their age even knew what the hell a Trapper Keeper was. And she struck up a conversation, and their friendship blossomed over a mutual love of baseball. Justina grew up watching the Brewers and Quinn grew up watching the Braves, who used to be a Milwaukee team, and yeah yeah, Quinn was well aware of that and loved Hank Aaron and Chipper Jones and even Brandon McCarthy. Justina rued the year 2011 like no other but will recall it as one of the most enthralling in Brewers history, and was ambivalent when Craig Counsell took the helm as manager, but she’s grown to like him.

Quinn enjoyed her baseball chats with Justina, but never imagined playing by her side until she mentioned being thrown off a little league team and the inevitable “wait, you play too?” exchange happened.

You wanna toss a ball after class? Justina asked her one fateful day. I don’t have a glove, Quinn answered. They were all in storage or packed away where she could never reach them, not long after Quincy’s passing. Gotcha covered. I brought one for you, Justina replied. So we throwing or what?

“Nah, where else can I hang with ladies as fine as this?” Justina was always inclusive, inspiring, iridescent. 

If Justina ever had a bad day, Quinn didn’t know about it. Quinn did, however, know how quickly they both loved baseball and shared a commonality in that the sport they loved so much never seemed to love them back. When throwing the ball around after class wasn’t enough anymore, they were rejected from trying out for rec leagues, often told apologetically that they had no more open spots, met by the questioning glances of men who probably wore business suits in the daytime.

Then the Milwaukee Belles announced open tryouts, and nothing could have made Quinn happier when they both made the roster.

They also met a few other people who’d develop into the best friends and teammates she could ask for: Bridge, a young mom of three who was part Amazon part golden retriever; Valenzuela, a skittish, deceptively strong olive-skinned girl from Texas with a wicked left hand delivery; Robles, a fearless, rough round the edges pitcher drafted from the Mexican leagues who had experience pitching to men, and Muramoto, a deeply heralded Japanese baseball legend, who had an enthusiastic and ever growing fanbase at every game.

“What’s Mel up to today?” Justina asks. “She browsing the rumor mill?”

“Funny you should ask. She thinks this emergency meeting is news that we signed Hamasaki, who posted for draft last season but she didn’t like any of the offers she got. Must be nice being the top ranked female baseball player in the world.”

“Should be the top ranked baseball player in the world if we’re being honest,” CJ says. “I’d hold out for a nice contract, especially if it means I’d have to move outta Japan.”

Quinn remembers her hands shaking as she signed her contract with the team, and not seeing that much money before in her life. Not long ago she moved into a sunny converted-loft convo in Walker’s Point with her girlfriend, Melia, a lifelong baseball fan who especially loves Korean and Japanese ball.  

Melia’s job is painting watercolor portraits of people’s pets, but the paintings she does at home for fun are always Quinn playing baseball. Melia once used Quinn’s roster photo as a reference and the portrait hangs awkwardly in their bathroom, right above the toilet. Quinn doesn’t have the heart to tell Melia that it really doesn’t belong there. It’s what she has to look forward to after every road trip.

The neighborhood is vibrant and welcoming and fun and all full of enough life to sustain a professional athlete and an artist, and on game days, Mel and Quinn wake up early, but stay in bed, giggling and staying warm on those early April mornings and sharing whatever is on each other’s mind, until Quinn really has to leave for the ballpark.

Before signing with the Belles, Quinn had never been to any of the cities the Women’s League is in, not counting Chicago, where her mom decided to settle off with a boyfriend she met off some dating site. They still see each other and get lunch here and then; Quinn leaves tickets for her at every visiting game in Chicago but never sees her mom in the stands.

Valenzuela, bless her heart, would always try to distract Quinn when she’d notice her looking at the seats. “You know I might need to throw at you with runners on if you’re covering, right?” She’d say in the dugout between innings, followed by a gentle hug.

Chicago might be her least favorite city to play in, but she still looks at the seats before every at-bat, to see if someone may be in them.

On days when Quinn is especially bad, she expects to see Quincy, yelling at her to pay attention to who’s on second.

But the seats are always empty.

She knows her father lives in Atlanta and she has branches upon branches of cousins sprouting all through the South but she’s never thought about reaching out. She knows she probably shouldn’t for a few reasons.

Quinn is the kind of shortstop that does not know what hesitation is. She goes for what she wants without thinking, almost reflexively. She sees line drives and her glove raises instinctually.

There is no time better than now, and this has always been her motto. It’s gotten her this far in life.

Her future is already written. There will be empty seats in visiting stadiums and blowout games and maybe a defensive error or two, but this is all part of the plan.

The plan is to be the greatest there ever was.

It’s the most she can give Quincy. 

He is certainly worth it.

“So we going inside to meet, eat, or both?” It’s Valenzuela, late to the party as usual, wearing a slick black bomber jacket with a rose gold tiger embroidered on the chest.

The rest of the girls fall around her, and with the clouds and fog, they seem like a badass girl gang set on world domination, and once again, the Milwaukee Belles are together again.

[midnightartemis]

Chapters: 34/? Fandom: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo, Finn/Rose Tico, Poe Dameron/Rey, Poe Dameron/Finn, Poe Dameron/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren Characters: Rey (Star Wars), Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, Finn (Star Wars), Poe Dameron, Rose Tico, Leia Organa, Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, Maz Kanata, Amilyn Holdo, Snoke (Star Wars), Boba Fett, Armitage Hux, Chewbacca (Star Wars) Additional Tags: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Abuse, Suicide Attempt, Star-crossed, Dreams, High School, School Dances, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Foster Care, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Near Death Experiences, Multiverse, Reincarnation, Attempted Sexual Assault, Assault, Graphic Description, Teenage Drama, Horny Teenagers, Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Past Drug Use, Drug Dealing

Chapter Thirty-Two

The next morning, there’s a quiet stillness that wakes me. It takes a second before I realize that the wind has stopped its incessant howl through the woods. I can’t remember the last time I had been somewhere so quiet. There was no hum of electricity, no dogs barking, no sirens. Ben sleeps beside me, my fingers rising and falling with his chest as he breathes. As I drift in and out, I can see her.

Dream Rey hovers in the air of her own accord. Her eyes are closed and her legs crossed in a deeply meditative state. Her lips move in a quiet mantra only she could hear. At first, we share the silence. Then the sounds and the smells and the warm green foliage of the forest surrounding her fade into my mind and solidify.

Rey’s eyes snap open, and, in an instant, the air between us electrifies. A long metal tube flies to her hand and a humming beam of bright blue light shoots from the end like an electric sword. “Who are you? What do you want?”

I hold my hands up slowly, not wanting to alarm her again. There was an itching feeling in my gut that told me she might have the answers I was looking for. “My name is Rey. I just want to talk.”

The woman’s brows furrow. “You’re the darkness. From the cave!”

“No!” I keep my hands up and don’t move. I don’t want her to sever this strange connection again. “No, please, believe me. I’m just trying to understand what’s going on. I don’t understand what’s going on. I was in a cabin in the woods and now I’m here. And it doesn’t feel like a dream.”

Rey studies me for a moment, seemingly wrestling with this strange occurrence in her head as well. She lowers her weapon and the blue blade disengages. “Are you with the First Order?”

“No. I don’t even know what that is.” I lower my hands slowly. It was strange to look at her, like looking in a mirror almost. Was this how twins felt? Was this woman my twin? “Are you- Are we sisters?”

The woman’s eyes flash with pain. “No. I don’t think we are. My name is Rey as well. Do you know where you are? Can you see what’s around me?”

“Yes, a forest. A jungle, really. Are you somewhere in South America?” I gaze around at the luscious green foliage that surrounds us. Everything is so vivid. I can smell the dirt and the sweet scent of plants and flowers. I can feel the cool ground beneath my bare feet and the light breeze against my skin.

“South America?” Rey gives me a puzzled look. “That’s a strange name.”

“You’ve never heard of South America? Didn’t they teach you that in school?”

She shakes her head. “I never went to school.”

“Oh.” I guess that explains a lot, sort of. “Can you see my surroundings?”

Rey shakes her head again. Is that what I look like when I’m confused? Do I really knit my brow like that? I’m going to have the worst wrinkles if I keep doing that. I snap myself out of my thoughts when I realize that Rey has asked me where I’m from. “Oh, Jakku. Ah… Vermont. America.”

“What?”

“America. The United States. You sound British. Are you in New Zealand or India, may-”

“You are not from Jakku. I am from Jakku.”

We both stare at each other uneasily. Rey is the first to break our silence. “What planet are you from?”

“Uh… Earth. What other planets are there?”

At my answer Rey takes a step back, nearly stumbling over a root. “Earth? Is that in the outer rim? The unknown regions?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m from Earth. Like all humans. There are no other planets that we’ve found that are habitable unless NASA is doing something we don’t know about which, really, is likely, but as far as I know there are no other planets that have humans on them in the Milkyway Galaxy and if there were I feel like they would probably have gone to school.” I’m rambling; I realize that, but I can’t stop myself. She’s giving me a look like I’m insane when really it's me who should be looking at her like that. “This is all just a dream right?”

“I’m not sleeping,” Rey says quietly. “This is real. At least for me.”

“Maybe I am going crazy. I saw those men die. I watched Hux and Snoke die right in front of me. I almost killed Bobby Fett. And the concussion… I’m going crazy aren’t I?”

“You watch Snoke die?”

“You know Snoke?” It wasn’t a common name. “Weird old guy with a twisted face?”

“Yes. I was there when he died. Ben killed him.”

“You know Ben? Right. The mirror incident. And no, Hux killed Snoke. Are we talking about the same people?”

“Maybe what we need to be asking is are we the same person?”

“Like… Twins?”

Rey shakes her head. “A divergence in the Force. Ripples of reality throughout time and space.”

“Alternate Reality.” The suggestion sends my mind reeling though I had no idea what she meant by the Force . I really was going crazy. I was- The forest around me began to fade away. The warm humidity was replaced with bitter cold. My hands and feet painfully numb with it. The green around me turned to bright white. I was blind until my eyes adjusted to the dazzling sun-lit snow around me.

Tall trees whose branches are covered in thick layers of snow and ice surround me. I spun trying to see a glimpse of the cabin, but my eyes landed instead on the remnants of a giant hollow tree. The four broken tree bases jutted out from the center base and curved towards the sky. All five trunks were long dead, the tops broken off and long gone.

Though I was freezing in the snow, wearing nothing but the shorts and t-shirt I wore to bed, there is a warmth and a light to this place. Something old and ancient calls to the deepest parts of my soul. I have no choice but to answer. Shivering, I stepped forward, walking towards the dark opening in the side of the massive tree.

The inside of the tree was surprisingly warm and dry. Even just a few degrees difference already does wonders for my cold hands and feet. An ancient life radiated from the long-dead tree. Life and death. Balance.

Beams of hazy sunlight filtered through cracks in the wood. One such beam cascaded down and highlighted a small chest nestled into a natural shelf in the wood.

“Impossible.”

The voice was my own though it did not come from my lips. I didn’t want to turn, didn’t want to face the reality that I was no longer dreaming, but that Rey from my dreams was here with me. She wore her strange clothes still- a thick all-white fabric, a tunic with strips of cloth crossing her torso. She seemed to glow in the dim light like a golden specter. Perhaps I was still dreaming.

“Why? Does this mean something to you?”

Her eyes narrowed in distrust. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Why? What is this place?”

“It’s sacred. And you should go.”

“Well, I didn’t mean to come here. I just kinda showed up. I don’t even know how to get back to the cabin.” I crossed my arms and turned to her fully. “Whatever is connecting us brought me here. So, maybe I’m going crazy, but I think I’m supposed to see this.”

Rey sighed. “I’m starting to understand why Luke doesn’t want to train me. I’m stubborn aren’t I?”

“Yes, we are.”

The glow surrounding Rey grew brighter as her form began to fade away. “Kirff. I can’t keep this up. I don’t understand how you’ve been able to cross over here so easily. Just- Take…. The books.”

“What? Wait!”

Rey fades away before she can say more and I am left alone in the hollow tree once more. Cautiously, I pick up the small, surprisingly heavy wooden chest terrified that something would jump out or something still stranger would happen. But, this was a dream, right? I couldn’t die in a dream. Not really.

There’s no symbols on the outside, nothing to give any clue about the chest’s origins. Just simple, rough wood. Judging by the state of the rust on the hinges, very old as well. Taking a deep breath, I open the lid.

Books. Six of them. Four hand-bound in leather, two also leather, but newer. All perfectly preserved. There’s a heady, papery scent that wafts off of them. How did Rey know that there would be books?

More importantly, if this was a dream, shouldn’t I be waking up right now? Or am I supposed to read the books? Can I even read if I’m dreaming?

“Rey!” The call is distant, desperate.

My heart races.

“Rey!” Ben’s voice bellows through the forest, closer now.

I close the lid on the books. No. No, this had to be a dream. This had to be. Please let this all be a dream. I close my eyes.

Wake up wake up wake up wake up.

“Rey!”

I pinch myself and I feel it. I feel the weight of the chest in my arms. I feel the warmth of the soil beneath my bare feet. It’s all real. It’s all real and it can’t be.

“Rey!” Ben stumbles into the hollow tree and nearly crashes into me, grabbing my shoulders in his hands. His eyes are wild and dark and terrified. “Goddammit, Rey! What the hell?”

I’m frozen in place, unable to move, unable to process it all.

“It’s all real. It’s not a dream.”