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sillysnack · 2 years

Text

when he sees me

/ (romantic)

pairing: carlos madrigal / reader

prns used: they/them (told in 2nd person)

word count: 3384

request by an anon! hope u and anyone else reading enjoys < 3

part 1 of ldr w/ carlos lmao | masterlist

— — — — —

notes + the request: modern au ! ye HAHASHHA tl;dr the request is carlos ghosts the reader for quite some time but the reader doesn’t know why and carlos cant rlly talk to you so 🤷‍♀️

content warning for cursing

tagging @kissingharu nagpa-tag siya eh tnx sa su4t (su-four-t > support)

— — — — —

You don’t know what happened. A week ago, you two were perfectly fine! Carlos would message you a few minutes after he woke up, as usual; you two would fall asleep on call together, you’d talk to each other's families as if you all lived in one big house; typical stuff you two would do as a couple. For some reason though, Carlos hasn’t replied to you in a week; no updates or anything, not even on his other accounts.

Did Carlos ghost you? Surely, he wouldn’t, right? But why weren’t the two of you talking? He makes sure to send you messages if anything comes up, he always does. It’s okay if he sometimes forgets to update, though. Maybe this week’s just one of those times. Maybe he’s perfectly fine, but just doesn’t want to talk to you!

“Hang on, that’s literally what ghosting is.” You look at your phone. You’ve probably sent him more than a dozen text messages just within the day, but you get no response.

carlos, mi vida?

delivered.

i hope i’m not being too clingy but i miss you. i hope ur doing well :)

delivered.

i think i might come and visit you, if thats okay? i mean, we do trust each other long enough to give our addresses

delivered.

plus we deliver shit to each other almost every day LMAO

delivered.

we *do* talk a lot about meeting up soon… r u okay with that soon being today?

delivered.

taking that as a ‘yes’ btw! going to ask my parents if theyre ok with me going to your house

delivered.

amor, i hope you’re safe. i love u <3 see u later

delivered.

Lord knows you’ve sent too many messages to Carlos. Hell, you sent him around eight messages just that morning.

8:22 AM

gm carlos! hope you slept well 💟

delivered.

youre probably still sleeping, in which case, sleep well! dont forget your meals & to take care of yourself

delivered.

i love you!

delivered.

9:34 AM

HI CARLOSSS just finished eating breakfast!

(You sent a photo.)

delivered.

have you eaten breakfast alr ?? u better 😒

delivered.

I FEEL SO CLINGY FUCK SORRYYy i just💔💔 i miss youu 🥀🖤☠

delivered.

I WONT BOTHER U ANYMORE TODAYY

delivered.

jk lol We r literally in a relationship. pro is youre in love and its really fucking adorable, cons are youre in love with ME (manmade curse)

delivered.

You scroll through your messages last night. God, to say that you like Carlos was an understatement; you were absolutely smitten for a guy you met online. But hey, as long as you're happy!

carlosss

delivered.

im going to sleep alreadyyy ! ik its like 2am so you better be asleep rn 😒 although i wouldnt be surprised if you arent. take care of yourself though, amor </3

delivered.

okay i think its safe to assume to you’re asleep rn

delivered.

anyways, goodnight carlos! hope i could call you again,,.. i love uu

delivered.

a little selfie before i sleep so you dream of me <3 (i WILL hunt you mwahaha)

(You sent a photo.)

delivered.

alright love ya!

delivered.

What the hell was I thinking? You shut your eyes, maybe the clingy-sounding messages I sent will go away. Obviously, they did not.

I wonder what he’s doing right now. Maybe Carlos is grounded, or something. Wouldn’t be surprised. Love him to death but God would be laughing if I said he wasn’t a menace.

— — —

“I dropped my phone once, so what? Now I don’t get to talk to the light of my life?” Camilo frowns. “See, it’s stuff like that that makes me want to punch you in the face. Don’t forget you lost a bet! A true man keeps his word.” Carlos rolls his eyes.

“Camilo, don’t say things like that! Say it like this,” Mirabel turns to her cousin with a gentle smile, “I am happy for you and your relationship, but you’ve become a bit more unbearable to be around.”

Carlos sticks his tongue out. “You say that like I don’t know that already? Not my fault you two aren’t in relationships that are as great as mine– let alone the fact you two don’t have a partner at all.” Mirabel and Camilo glare at Carlos.

Dolores approaches the trio. “Keep your phones away from Carlos. If he does, he’ll get another day of not talking to his amor.” She laughs as she pulls out Carlos’s phone. One notification after another. “This is payback, for all the times you’ve made fun of us.”

Isabela nods. Carlos furrows his eyebrows. She wasn’t here a minute ago? “For all the times you’ve yelled out ‘¡Señorita, mi prima piensa que es bonita!’ (Miss, my cousin thinks you’re pretty!) to a pretty woman in public while I’m around.” She crushes a flower that Carlos didn’t even notice she was holding.

“I was right, though. You– almost 100% of the time– do think the person is pretty.” Isabela narrows her eyes at Carlos. “I could’ve told them myself, thank you very much.” Carlos just smiles. “I was doing you a favor, you’re very much welcome. I’m going to go get myself a glass of water now.”

Carlos stands up and turns to Dolores, “Can you at least just let me read some of their messages?” Dolores shakes her head. “Why would you just read their messages and not reply to them? That’s just hurtful.” Carlos shrugs, his sister has a point.

Bzzt. A new notification. Carlos tries to snatch his phone from Dolores, but fails as she passes it to Isabela; then to Mirabel, Camilo, Antonio, Luisa, then back to Dolores. “What did I ever do to you guys?”

Apparently it was a lot, considering they were all in Carlos’s room for more than 30 minutes.

— — —

“Ma, you know Carlos, right?” Your mama nods. “Of course! Your boyfriend! He’s very sweet, how is he?” You smile for a second. My boyfriend. “Ma! He isn’t my boyfriend yet, we’re making it official once we meet up in person. But Carlos has been… inactive. But I’m planning to visit him soon. You know how I’ve always talked about meeting Carlos in person? And how I’ve been a great child to you all and therefore feel like I should have a reward of some sorts?”

Your mama looks at you playfully, “Are you trying to ask me if you can visit Carlos in his house? Do you even know where he lives?” You nod and proudly say, “If he knows where I live, I should know where he lives too.”

“I don’t know what to say to that… but… I’ll accompany you on your way to your boyfriend’s house? When are you going to go?” You shrug. “Maybe today, mama. I’ll ask him first.”

CARLOS MADRIGAL the love of my life my other half my little scrumbo my soon-to-be boyfriend my– [train passes by] HELLO

delivered.

U DONT HAVE TO REPLY TO THIS IMMEIDATELY BTWW

delivered.

immediately* lmao

delivered.

uhhhhh we talked abt meeting up A LOT and tbh i dont know when and where that wld be but AAHHhh i think. i think today is that day. ?????!@?#? at your house ??? if thats okay ?? !

delivered.

“So? Did he say yes?” You shake your head. “He hasn’t seen the message, mama. I’ll let you know if he replies!”

— — —

“Carlos, hijo,” Félix knocks on the door to Carlos and Camilo’s shared room, “Are you busy? I wanted to talk to you about something.” Carlos answers him, “Nope, papa. Come in! Camilo’s out making cup noodles.”

Félix approaches his son. “You talk as if your mellizo is making the same gourmet meals your tia Julieta makes.” The two laugh. “Si, si. My bad! Por cierto (by the way), what did you want to talk about?”

“Ah, I just wanted to ask how things are going with your partner. Y/N, right?” Carlos looks away from his dad. “Great! Haven’t talked to them in a week, though. I lost some bet to mis primas y hermanas.”

Félix takes a deep breath. “Carlos, I say this with love, but why would you let that happen?” Carlos just smiles. “I don’t know..? I kind of forgot why I had a bet with them in the first place.” He gets a light smack on the back of his head.

“¡Lo siento, papá! Originally, the bet was that I don't talk to Y/N for a day but if they catch me texting them with someone else’s phone– say, Camilo’s– I wouldn't talk to them for another day.” Félix laughs at his son. “You let yourself get caught? Hijo, I can’t back you up.”

Carlos just shrugs. “Can’t argue with that.”

Félix softens his voice, so Carlos could be the only one to hear him. “I can, however, help you talk to your amor– in person.” Carlos replies to his father in an equally hushed voice, “Papa, why are you whispering? Also, tell me more.” Félix just shrugs. “I’ll just drive you to their house, surprise them! Your first of many grand romantic gestures in the relationship.”

Carlos grins. “I like that! I’ll get dressed.”

“Be ready in 20 minutes. I’ll talk to your mami.”

Camilo enters and watches as their father walks out of the room with a smile on his face, he turns to Carlos. “What did you two talk about? Why are you going through your closet?”

Carlos scowls at Camilo. “I live here? Also, we just talked about eating out. Father-son bonding.”

“Without me? I doubt that.” Camilo places his cup noodles on a nearby table. Carlos replies, “Well, you’re eating right now.” Camilo shrugs. “I could eat it on the way. Come on, I’ll get ready too.”

“I’m meeting Y/N today.”

“Holy shit. You’re kidding?” Carlos stares at his brother. “Why would I lie?” Camilo grins and walks out of the room, running back to get his food. “Cool. Cool. ¡Felicidades!” He slowly walks out of the room.

“CARLOS MADRIGAL, NO LONGER BITCHLESS! LET’S GO! Hola, abuela y tia…” Carlos breaks out into laughter before picking an outfit to wear. He changes his clothes before looking for his primas and hermana. Can’t go to my soon-to-be-partner’s home without my phone.

“Dolores. Tienes mi teléfono, ¿verdad? (You have my phone, right?)” Dolores nods at Carlos. “Why are you dressed all fancy?” Carlos looks at his outfit, just a maroon T-shirt tucked into black pants. “I’m not? Wait, I guess this is better than my usual outfits–”

“There is nothing different with this outfit.” Mirabel interrupts.

“–Cállate (Shut up.) Papa’s taking me to meet up with Y/N.” Luisa visibly chokes on her drink for a split second. “Is that why Camilo yelled something about you not being ‘bitchless’ anymore?”

Carlos sighs. “Yeah. Where is he, though?” His cousins and sister shrug. “‘Kay.” Félix walks toward them with a smile on his face, he makes eye contact with Carlos and puts his thumbs up.

“Ah, papá está aquí (papa’s here.) Hasta luego, losers.” Mirabel rolls her eyes. “Hope it goes terribly. Tell Y/N I said hello, though!” Carlos flips off Mirabel, quickly putting his middle finger down so he doesn’t get scolded by any of the adults in their home.

“Can I have my phone now?” Dolores whispers to her cousins while Carlos just stands there.

“Carlos! ¡Darse prisa! (Hurry up!)” Carlos yells out to his father, “¡Sí papá! Solo espera un minuto.” (Yes, papa! Just wait one minute.) He approaches them. “Where’s my phone?”

“With Camilo…” Carlos groans. “Okay, gracias.”

— — —

Carlos held his phone tightly on the way to your house. What if you gave him the wrong address? Or you and your family had moved homes but he didn’t know since you two haven’t talked in a week?

Holy shit. You two haven’t talked in a week– did you break up with him? Without even being in a relationship? Could that happen? It probably could. So many things could have possibly gone wrong before Carlos even met you in person. Is this why people don’t like online relationships?

“...Carlos! We’re almost there. Have you texted them yet?” Carlos shakes his head. Apparently in the week that his phone was being passed around his cousins and siblings, it was only charged on the first two days.

— — —

You purse your lips together. You felt like prettying yourself up today. Lord knows why– you don’t– but he does! You look at yourself in the mirror, you look good.

Although this gut feeling that you have to prepare for something won’t go away, so you put together an outfit that you’re pretty sure can be worn inside and outside your house.

“Looking good!” You take out your phone and hope for any new notifications, specifically from one particular Madrigal.

“None.” You sigh. He didn’t even acknowledge any of your messages for the past few days. Maybe it was the end?

heyyy carlos

delivered.

probably not a good start to that lol

delivered.

uhm. is this ur way of saying you dont like me anymore ? hshdjhs i’d be sad if you dont like me anymore obviously but i’d understand. people change ! but u could have just told me straight to the point yk????? didnt have to go ghost me like that lmao

delivered.

god. tbh i’d be an annoying ex so maybe reconsider breaking up with me? jk

delivered.

why cant i unsend messages here fuck!!

delivered.

okay i’ll actually stop spamming you this time 💔 watch me not reply for a week too. PAYBACK!

delivered.

me sending this as if i wouldnt reply to your messages in a heartbeat. dumb bitch behavior!

delivered.

You look at the mirror as if you were in a reality show, and some other person with you did some dumb shit– except you’re the person who did the dumb thing. “I could go for some (favorite beverage) right now. Huh, maybe that’s why I wanted to dress up today.”

“¡Oye, Y/N, hay alguien en la puerta! ¿Puedes conseguirlo? (Hey, Y/N, someone's at the door! Can you get it?)” You answer your dad, “Si, papa! Tell them to wait just a minute!” You grab your wallet and phones, checking it once again for a reply from Carlos.

from: camilo madrigal

Y/N IS HE THERE YET? IS MY LOSER TWIN BROTHER THERE

read.

“Huh?” You make small steps out of your room, eyes glued to your phone.

wdym

read.

what??????? R U ALL PRANKING ME OR SMTH??

read.

NOT NOWW SOMEONES AT THE DOOR

read.

WELL I DONT..?????

read.

DONT LEAVE ME ON SEEN WHY R U AND UR TWIN BROTHER LIKE THISSS 💔💔💔💔

delivered.

just got deja vu 🤗😒

read.

oh hey. BYE opening the door RNN

read.

You roll your eyes as you turn off your phone. What’s got Camilo so excited about? His brother ghosting you? Fun! You open the door, just to get whatever situation that was about to unfold over with.

Nothing. Absolutely nothing got you prepared for who was at the other side of the door.

“Am I dreaming? You don’t talk to me for a week and suddenly you’re at the door of my own home. What the hell? Are you kidding me?”

You didn’t know what to feel; you two have been talking about meeting each other for months and now it’s… real. He’s in front of you.

You finally meet the guy you’ve been talking to for months in person, and you just stand there like a statue.

“Hola… bad time?”

You shake your head. “Absolutely not! Uhm, I was just heading out to buy a drink.”

Ask him why he hasn’t been replying to any of your messages.

“Come in!” You make way for Carlos, who awkwardly walks in. “Pa, Carlos is here.” Your father rolls his eyes. “Not again! I told you, I won’t be weird around your boyfrie– ay, he’s actually here.”

“Papa!”

Carlos smiles at your dad. “Hola, senor.”

The silence is dreadful.

— — —

“I’m glad your papa allowed us to go out.” You shrug as you take a sip of your drink. “Pretty cool, right? Anyways, I have a question! Nothing too serious, although it kind of is…”

You take a deep breath. Here goes nothing.

“Why didn’t you respond to me? For, like, a week? Is everything okay at home?” Carlos cuts you off, laughing, before you spiral any further. “Yeah, everything’s okay. Just lost a bet to my cousins and siblings.”

A bet?! Why am I surprised? He’s always got bad luck when betting with his family.

“Not another bet… what were you all doing?”

Carlos chuckles. “This is a long story, do you want me to summarize it?” You shrug. “Surprise me.”

So that’s what Carlos did. Apparently the Madrigals betted on who could last a day without stealing any of each other’s stuff– the grandkid that’s caught by an adult loses– “It’s a silly thing, I know.”

Carlos got caught stealing one of Camilo’s clothes by his Tia Julieta. Why was he stealing them?

“I was going to make it look like he was sneaking in the kitchen that night, lo cual no es del todo falso (which isn't entirely untrue).”

You start laughing. “Every time you tell me a story about your family, they get wilder and wilder yet they’re all true? Are you sure you’re not lying to me?”

Carlos shakes his head. “No! Sorry if the way I say stuff feels like a lie. But it’s true, I lost a bet and they were all, like, ‘don’t talk to Y/N for a day. If any of us catches you with someone’s phone, another day gets added.’ Apparently there was a limit to that.

“I’m sorry I didn’t reply to any of your messages, I really am.”

You smile at him. “Can’t stay mad at you.” Carlos types something on his phone and you hear a buzz coming from yours.

Carlos replied to your photo: wow you are absolutely stunning

read.

(carlos) icb ur real. insane how god lets angels walk among us

read.

STOP WE’RE LITERALLY RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER

read.

(carlos) i love u

read.

You abruptly close your phone and turn away from Carlos. “I love you too.”

Carlos smiles. “You said the L-word.”

“I know.”

You and Carlos are quiet for a while. It isn’t awkward, it isn’t unbearable. It was cute. Like in coming-of-age movies where the main character and their love interest go on a date as a couple for the first time.

“Do you remember when I asked you to be my partner for the first time?” You nod, “I said I’d give you an answer when we met up in person.” Carlos nods. “Do you have an answer already?”

You nod. “Ah, considering the past week, it’s quite difficult to answer you– who am I kidding? Of course I’ll be your partner!” Carlos lets out a sigh he didn’t even know he was holding. “Thank God! I was worried you’d say no; which is totally okay, it’s your choice! I’d make a good boyfriend, though. Mirabel and I made a powerpoint.”

You raise your eyebrows. “I know you’re my boyfriend already but I need to see that.” Carlos checks his phone. “I think I have the file here, I’m not sure.”

You pull your phone out and open your previous conversation with Camilo. “Right, your brother was asking me if I saw you already and if I did, asked for selfies.”

Carlos reads the conversation. “Okay, we’re definitely taking photos. Don’t send any of them to Cami, though.” You wink at him. “No promises!”

— — —

Carlos looks at his phone. A new message from Camilo.

(c) just saw your photos on y/n’s posts 🤗 u look like shit 🤗 tell y/n i said hi though and congrats to you two stay strong or whatever

go to hell

read.

you are literally the only one to call me bitchless

read.

closing the phone rn GOODBYE.

read.

#carlos madrigal #carlos madrigal x reader #camilo madrigal #yeah that's all

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oversimplify-it · 3 years

Text

Story Process Tag by @herpixels

I was tagged by @dynastiasimss - Thank you so much for tagging me!! 😊💖💗 This will most definitely get a bit wordy because I’m terrible at explaining things concisely! 😂 Also, I’ll mostly be talking about my process for 2.B.A Grandmaster but I’ll touch on my process for Erin in San Myshuno too!

I’m also going to get tags out of the way up here so that no one has to scroll all the way through this ... absolute novel that is under the cut LMAO so I tag: @cyansimblr @x-simss @matchacake and any other simblrs who wanna do this!! and feel free to skip if you want!

1. Your writing process My writing process is very, very chaotic, and changes with the wind... Erin in San Myshuno doesn’t really have a process, I just play the game and then put in some dialogue based on the events. None of it is guided by my hand at all though! 2.B.A Grandmaster on the other hand is written in part based on what happens in game and in part by my own creative vision. Most of the time, I let stuff happen, and then fill in the blanks in between events. I go in game, play Sims as I normally would (skill build, take care of needs, go out to venues, etc.) and then watch what weird and interesting things happen. For example, Augusta’s meeting with Xavier in the beginning was completely the game’s doing! He was the only one to show up for the Welcome Wagon event, so I rolled with that. Scenes like Kaitlin’s meeting with Maverick and those sort of things are planned by me, as they’re necessary to create a more full narrative! It’s like collaborative storytelling, but my “partner” is a game that is weird and random and crazy. 😂 After stuff happens in game and I get screenshots, I then actually write for it. I chose to write novel style for the series because - as some of my long-term followers may remember - I had another story that was just screenshots with dialogue on them? And it was very hard, LOL, it didn’t suit my workflow very well and I ended up dropping it after a month or so. I wanted 2.B.A Grandmaster to be something I could post consistently, and so I opted for a style that I was more familiar and experienced with!

2. Scene building For the most part, I just work with what sims gives me, but as I mentioned above, some scenes I actually go to the trouble of setting up. For those, I still use the sims animations mostly (I’ve used poses about 3 times in 2.B.A Grandmaster so far) but I do usher my sims around the "set” as I see fit. I build a lot of my own lots and locations for 2.B.A GM because I tend to get a vision in my mind of what I want and refuse to settle for less. 😂 One such case is the scene where Maverick meets up with Octavia--

I made the alleyway we see here - it’s two entirely empty buildings sandwiched side by side on an otherwise empty lot in Oasis Springs. The only part I bothered to decorate was the alley itself because I knew I wasn’t going to use the rest of the area, but maybe we’ll revisit it sometime and I’ll finish the two buildings! I actually loved making this set and like how it turned out, LOL~

Then I just have whatever sims are involved in a scene interact with each other for ages until I feel like I have enough screenshots to make a scene. I usually have a vague idea of what’s going to be said in any given scene - especially the ones I actually planned out beforehand - but I get some excess screenshots to be safe. I try lots of different interactions and pause like every few frames to get interesting expressions and stuff, LOL. Lots of “Complain about Cold Weather” and “Give fake bad news” ...

3. CC/Pose making I don’t actually make my own CC for 2.B.A GM specifically (I’ve made a couple eyeshadows but I don’t use them super frequently) but there is a scene coming up in the future that I plan to make poses for. I have a very clear image in my mind that includes a lot of subtle expressions and very specific things that I doubt I could find poses for, so I’m gonna have to brave the terrifying landscape of blender in order to make it a reality. 😧

4. Getting in the zone I don’t have any sort of “ok, show time” ritual like some people do but I wish I did, because my motivation waxes and wanes so unpredictably. Some days I just don’t feel like doing anything, and other days I edit and write for 5 posts in a row! I am always listening to something though, usually music, every once in a blue moon a video with lots of talking. 5. Screenshot folder

UGH...

6. Captions I don’t do captions on 2.B.A GM posts, but for my city living gameplay I do! I keep them simple, because I don’t want to make it too much work for myself. Erin in San Myshuno’s style of editing is 100% based around ease, because I wanted something to post often that didn’t put too much of a strain on me. Verdana in white, typically 35-40 px, with a gradient border. Each sim we encounter has a different gradient color, usually based on their outfit or just the ~vibe~ I get from them. Erin’s gradient is Hot pink to ... gee, what would you call it. Sonic the Hedgehog Blue LMAO-- I chose that gradient because that’s the color of the overlay, which I’ll talk more about in the next section!

7. Editing My two ‘series’ - and I use that term loosely LMAO - have different editing processes, so I’ll try to summarize them both. Basically, for 2.B.A Grandmaster, I touch up the saturation and brightness depending on the scene. If it’s evening in the shots, I usually won’t touch brightness, and if it’s night, I might even lower it a bit for more accurate lighting! Once that’s done, I blur everything but relevant elements of a scene, usually the character we’re following or who is speaking. I have to select the character from the background manually which takes a bit, but other than that it’s very minimal.

My shots aren’t super glamorous, but I prefer simple screenshots and actually being able to keep up with a story schedule as opposed to what happened with my last story. 😬 As for Erin in San Myshuno, barring captions which I only do when I feel it’s necessary, it’s literally just an overlay on otherwise untouched screenshots. 😭 I would do more, but again, it’s supposed to be an easy downtime sort of series for me so~

This goes over top all screenshots on the “Add” setting at 20% opacity. It brightens things up and softens them, as well as making the colors slightly more harmonious! If anyone wants me to go more in depth on editing, or maybe captions, please let me know! I’m happy to talk about it if it’ll help anyone, and I know that a lot of tutorials cover how to do stuff in Photoshop, whereas I use FireAlpaca (which is 100% free btw! It’s more of an art program, but not bad for editing) 8. Throwback!

Oh boy, so this is one of my first posts on simblr. For starters, I didn’t know about camera mode at the time, so that’s the first thing I would change obviously LOL. 😬 The framing I did at the time was ... cute, but it makes the pictures feel kind of cramped and small in my opinion, so I did away with that for all of my later stories. Also, Amy and Gemma aren’t very well centered in this picture! Other than that, this isn’t actually terrible I don’t think, so aside from maybe blurring the background as I do on 2.B.A GM now, I wouldn’t change too much! Thankfully, I had observed other people’s stories before making my own on here for a little bit, so I wasn’t starting with absolutely no idea what to do, but I still think I’ve improved since I made these. 😊

This was a ton of fun!! If anyone has questions or wants more info on anything I covered in here, absolutely feel free to ask, and thank you so much if you actually read through all of this - I know I rambled for quite a while!! 🙏

#tag #extras: 2.B.A Grandmaster

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botwstoriesandsuch · 4 years

Note

P-please talk about your Rito OC, please... ramble without any context, please... I have one too... please make me feel less alone...

Ok ok let me just *unloads all of Illeka’s super angsty self-indulgent backstory*

I technically have two backstories, one for botw that I’m gonna use for my fic Where Time Takes Us, and another I use for my dnd campaign. My dnd one is more fleshed out (thanks to my amazing GM) so I’ll probably just share that one.

Warning for super duper long post that is barely coherent and I haven’t checked for typos and also rip to ADHD folks because I have no pictures to ease your brain with. Anyhow prepare for like thousands of words worth of rambles this is not edited at all

This is just a copy paste of the random incoherent shit I sent to my poor DM. Anyhow, I technically have 3 ocs here, but Illeka is the one I play

A weird Rito, that one is. I hear they’ve only cried at birth...

- Illeka was born on the Day of Living Fire, its a celebration of the dead essentially, where you mourn and remember your loved ones and ancestors and all that. It’s superstition to be *born* on this day, because your life/creation takes away from the day that’s supposed to honor the dead, and some people on birb island believe these things, that if you let the kid live it’s a curse. But most people are like no wtf you boomers it’s fine there’s no such thing you crazy old people are weird, which to be fair is kinda true.

- When Talako is around 6, his single mom dies. He’s adopted by a new family, Kala (also around 6 years old) and her parents.

- Illeka meets Talako after he kinda follows her around, because he’s an innocent cinnamon bun that admires Illeka’s calm and stoic demeanor after they help him with some bullies. Through this, Talako, Illeka, and Kala all become best friends.

- The events in Illeka’s life aren’t really helping their whole curse case. Every bad event, from their dad getting injured and having the slightest limp, to their brother, Zekk nearly setting himself on fire— it’s all a supposed punishment for not killing them when they were bored. But at this point most people brush it off as coincidence, besides, nothing THAT bad has happened yet.

- the trio of friends grow strong, becoming some of the best in their arts on the island. And their relationship is seemingly adorable. The serious ~~cursed~~ one, the optimistic sunshine one, and the sarcastic firey one. Prides of their village, set to protect their people from harm.

- Illeka is the best in the village when it comes to physical fights. Trusty halberd, and a keen shot with a bow, they’ve never lost a sparring match on that front. Their personality is offputting to some, there’s a rumour that they’ve never cried. The easiest of jokes, and the vilest of insults don’t spark much reaction from them— except in the presence and topic of their family, Kala, and Talako. But otherwise, the story goes that the cursed kid doesn’t have a soul, and hence, no morality or emotions.

- When they train with Talako and Kala, they never back down, if only out of respect, Illeka wouldn’t want to embarrass them with pity. Talako always laughs at his inevitable defeat, though he tries nonetheless. He promises that one day he’ll be strong enough to beat them.

- Talako is a pleasant soul, but has an nack for adventure and a hint of chaos. He prefers to dual wield daggers, and on occasion a short sword or two. He’s great with the blade, loves the thrill of the fight, but is more skilled with cooking and physical healing and remedies. He’s always the one encouraging fun celebratory hang outs at the tavern, with his two closest friends after a day of guarding the village. Kala always sides with him, and Illeka typical gives in after at least putting on a show of reluctance. He humble and happy and loved by most of the village, if only things would last

- Kala is of wit and cunning, she’s typically the first to speak. She’s headstrong and not afraid to insult whoever she displeases, and a bit too arrogant in her abilities. She laughs at all of Talako’s jokes, if perhaps only to spite Illeka’s groans. She’s also the most strategic of her friends, being the “one with a plan” in battle. While she’s a decent wield of two khopesh, Kala’s mostly gifted with magic. She’s got a knack for conjuring, though is well researched in other types as well. Illeka and her are an even match, with decent win ratios on either end. Illeka doesn’t take it that personally, they suck/hate magic after all. Kala’s a bit more competitive tho.. While her power in magic is certainly the best on all of the island, she can’t help but feel salty/jealous for always being overshadowed by Illeka’s feats, since the people prefer/understand the physical over the magic.

- Oh, and she was born on day after the Day of Living Fire, according to her parents. How lucky.

- In a sense, they’re all a bit of an outcast. Kala the fiery independent one, a bit sidecasted for prefering magic over steel. Talako the weird orphan, for being a chirpy, happy boi, which is a bit annoying for some. And Illeka…well lets just say their situation isn’t going to be improving

- One year, Illeka’s family is expecting more kids, twin sisters at that! It’s the most excited anyone’s ever seen Illeka, thought perhaps that’s not the right word… They’ve still got their usual demeanor, but they did spend nearly a week crocheting little baby hats and tunics and scarves. They threatened to kill their brother if they told anyone, although Zekk was allowed to let it slip to Tal and Kala

- [They are absurdly good at crochet btw. They never do it anymore to try and maintain their “reputation,” but their family will never forget the time they crafted matching blankets and hats to win a little competition in their home town.]

- Then the Day of Living Fire arrives for that year. Theres a little celebration for Illeka’s birthday, before moving on to other activities.

- The twins die that night.

- The village was in a bit of shock…and rumours grow considering the timing of it. The mysterious circumstance of it…well it does turn the heads of even some of the less-superstitious. The rumours, the death, the silent thought that perhaps that cursed bird caused some babies’ death, Illeka endured it.

- Years later would it get worse.

- Illeka is still publically respected at this point, weird rumours sure, but try telling that to the edge of her halberd. Their mother had made the twin’s shrine, but they say Illeka didn’t visit that often. Talako was always by their side, trying to help them, which was always appreciated, even when they tried to hide it.

- Kala was busy in the library these days.

- Zekk had started a family by now, a little baby birb named Mili hatched into the world. Illeka would often steal her away for little cuddles when they (thought) no one was looking. Zekk would jest that they had to fight for the right to hold his own kid. Kala would also occasionally tease them about it, though Tal was mostly happy to see them in better spirits

- Then, another Day of Living Fire.

- Talako and Illeka were usually on guard duty together, the northern patrol by the village edge. But tal was still a bit worried about his friend’s state of mind, he’s not sure he’d even seen them mourn. He pushes for Illeka to take the day off, it’s technically their birthday after all, plus they can pay their respected at the shrines and attend the festivities and do the ceremonies and all that. Illeka denies it, brushing it off like they always do.

- Soon, their nightly patrol begins, and Illeka is about to set off to met up with Talako, but Kala intercepts. She has a talk with them, similar to that of Talako’s, but with…more well crafted and laced words. It’s nearly the same message that Talako tried to tell them, “It’ll be healthy for you, visit the shrines, be with your family, maybe brush off some rumours in the process.” Illeka nearly denies again, joking that Talako would get afraid of the dark if they didn’t show up. But Kala interjects, stating that she’s already made plans to take the patrol that nigth with Tal. Trusting their friends to be safe in each others care, Illeka relents and takes the day off.

- …yeah. so

- perhaps you can see where this is going.

- Kala’s jealousy had been growing over the years. Not only was she being shadowed by Illeka and their non magic ways, but it was irritating even more that all the talk about magic in the town was not of her exceptional abilties, but of stupid rumours and non-existent evil curses. If the people wanted show, she’d give them a show

- This mindset made her spars with Illeka a bit more personal as of late, getting it in her head that she needed to get stronger, strong enough to best Illeka with ease. Strong enough so that there would be no question who was the best warrior on the island, magic, bows, halberds, or no.

- The library had many forgotten books that she had been studying. Conjuring, rituals, illusions, necromancy. It was all…beautiful. Kala soaked in every word, sometimes berating the bookkeeper offhandedly for not keeping them in the best condition

- In her research she eventually found a beast. A..thing, a demon? A monster, the specifics weren’t there, but the gist of it was, if you had the courage to summon it, it would grant you the knowledge for attaining anything you desired. All it asked in return was…to eat some people.

- But not just any people mind you! Supposedly the ritual only worked for the people with the greatest of ambitions, willing to sacrifice the lives of people they might care about. The sacrifices had to be of someone with great trust and bond with the person.

- Kala’s parents disappeared that day, a few feathers laid about, but there was no blood.

- Near the northern border, by a open field, a weird circle dripped the grass red

- Talako waited by the village edge, ready to fly off with their patrol partner when they arrived. When Kala greeted him, he was a bit surprised, but happy when she explained that Illeka had gone off back to town.

- Indeed Illeka was with their family now, as the sun started to set. Occasionally, a passerby would give them a weird glance before walking swiftly away.

- Somewhere in the northern border, a warrior is knocked unconcious, and dragged upon a blood red pattern

- Illeka is by her sisters’ shrine. For the sliver of a moment, they contemplate crying.

- Then an explosion is heard off in the distance

- Talako was wide awake at this point, although his wings being pinned to his sides wasn’t that helpful considering there was a giant, *giant* dark monster in front of him.

- Kala lets off a final remark, saying it was for his own good. The death would be swifter if he didn’t squirm.

- He whipped back at her, glaring with a fire she hasn’t seen before. He calls her a coward for tricking Illeka, a coward for kill their parents, a coward for not even giving him the decency to fight for his life.

- She nearly smiles at the last remark. “Fine.” She tosses him his blades. “You were never much of a warrior anyway.”

- Illeka was flying towards the booming sound at full speed, nearly knocking over their family and other mourning, people in the process. A few others had tried to slow them down, claiming they should suit of better first, before confronting whatever had been the source of the explosion. Illeka didn’t listen.

- They barely had time to grab a weapon, before approaching the northern border. After gracing the crests of the hill tops, they finally saw it. A giant demonic beast, snapping it’s jaws against a flying dash of black feathers, Talako.

- Illeka called out to him, nearly dashing off into the air again, but they stopped when they spotted Kala, standing idlely by next to her.

- Before they could even speak, before they could even question why she was acting so nonchalantly while their best friend was fighting for their life against an evil monstrosity, Kala shook her head and spoke. “You always have to ruin my fun, don’t you?” She struck a magic blow and Illeka, square in the chest.

- It knocked them to the ground, but they got up, setting their halberd and pointing it at them.

- Then insert some dramatic scene where Kala is like “you’re so selfish, hogging all the attention, thinking you’re better than me, but today I’m gonna finally best you mwahaha” and Illeka is like “wtf why did you do this? I thought we were friends? I trusted you?? the fuck? also talako is our friend!!?” and then its “yeah thats right I manipulated your stupid feelings to gain the upperhand. you’re super pathetic honestly for falling for it. anyhow yeah talako will probably die, i tried to give him the luxary of a swift death but he wouldn’t listen, so now he’s probably gonna get brutally slayed lol” and illeka is all “I’ll kill you” and kala is “no u. This whole thing is gonna give me so much power no ones gonna question me again” and then they fight each other

- The duel is nearly a draw, Kala’s magical ability is certainly is certainly stronger, but she’s not as all powerful without that knowledge from the demon monster guy that needs to eat his meal. Illeka is fighting with all theyve got, but all they brought was a halberd, but they are very fueled by rage and spite so it’s still an even match. Illeka eventually lands a blow that’s got Kala bleeding severely, but Kala pretty much almost kills them with a direct attack. Kala’s too weak to finish the job, plus those other guards have finally started to fly and approach in the distance, so she flys off. Illeka finally slips into unconsciousness.

- When they wake up, it’s almost sunrise. Their mom is shaking them awake, part of the party that was investigating the explosion that summoned the beast. Illeka bolts up, they’re still in the field were they had fought Kala, but she and the beast are no where to be seen.

- They run off, trying to find Talako, and ho boy do they find him alright. His body is crumpled by some rocks, his wing nearly ripped clean off, theres so much blood, even a warrior like Illeka can hardly bare it. Some small bit of hope in their head thinks that he might still be alive, and they listen to his chest to see if he’s still breathing.

- His eyes flicker once at Illeka, his chest rises, then falls for the last time.

- Illeka cries.

- Then, still pretty wounded and tired, they collapse again

- The days following are living hell. Kala hasn’t been found, and their her parent’s [bodies]. The rumours are creeping as ever, at the coincidence of Illeka and this disaster. They spend nearly a weak in bed at home, recovering physically, thought probably not mentally.

- As soon as they’ve fully recovered, Illeka’s mind is set. They are going to leave, no more warrior/village protection for them. They’re going to travel far off, train and hone their skills in combat, and find and kill Kala.

- Their family is opposed to this at first, but in the end nothing they say changes Illeka’s mind.

- In a sense, there was another, unspoken reason Illeka was leaving the islands. They didn’t want to hurt anyone else.

- Hell, the rhetoric is even stronger down the line, concerning the fate of poor Mili. Illeka has given in and accepted it, they are cursed to cause pain to the people they care about. [It’s basically that trope of the character isn’t actually cursed but they believe they’re cursed] Illeka will stay away, and go it alone for as long as they can. Then once the deed is done, once they draw Kala’s corpse across the mud, they’ll probably fly off somewhere far to die, before anyone else gets hurt. It’s probably best for their family never to see them again.

- - - - - -

Wow you did it, you made it through the super angsty self-indulgent backstory congrats. Illeka is my lil baby and I love them and I’ve gonna send them on a revenge quest and then they were gonna have a cool character arc probably about learning to grieve and have self worth and all that and to actually allow themselves to show emotions for once in their lives. That’s the general plan I had in my head anyhow

But you know what my dm thought?

They were like how about mORE ANGSt

Fucking shit you not, session three of the campaign, I’m heading back to birb island because of circumstances, and I’m getting supplies from my blacksmith dad and showing off this sword that says “fuck” a lot that I got from a dungeon that took a selkie’s soul which they gave up willingly in exchange for fire hair...long story

but THEN I meet up with my bro Zekk and it’s like “wassup bro just passing through” but then I find out that Talako’s shrine thing was DESTORYED by some unknown entity and that’s very not good because spirituality and all that

and also I find Mili and they’re a cute lil toddler birb now aww it’s so great hope nothing happens to them because I sure do have enough emotional traume to burden right now. anyhow due to CIRCUMSTANCES our only lead to the thing that destroyed Talako’s shrine is 1) a delinquent named Chesio [that our party nicknamed cherrio because the GM misspelled it the first time i think] who apparently was Talako’s shitty cousin and his only living relative who could build his shrine and 2) the destruction of the shrine lines up with a period of time where Mili went missing but its ok she came back so her parents were like “chill we gucci”

Our party decides we should go down the Mili lead [because I accidentally knocked Cherrio i mean Chesio to near death with a crit roll with my halberd so they’re in the infirmary now but it’s really not my fault that they triggered my emotional trauma by mentioning how I keep running away from grief and never staying around to confront it it’s fiiiiiiiiiiiiine] so we stop by Zekk’s house and we’re like “hey so remember when you disappeared for like a week where did you go, and then mili was like “oh it’s in this cavern that no one knows about and I can’t really give you the directions but I can lead you there if you take me with you” in which I then glare at the GM for this obvious attempt to force us to take Mili with us to put her in danger and apparently I was the ONLY one who cared about this because everyone else in the party was ready to adopt this birb child, and Zekk was like “sure take the kiddy harness” so here I am, watching my niece run around in a kiddy harness that’s also attached to me, while my Chaotic neutral party someone gets grilled cheese sandwiches in the background

Badabing, badaboom, we come to some crystal caverns. while I, being one of the only members of the party with morals other than one chaotic good dragonborn, am watching the selkie, halfoot, and elf girl steal a bunch of crystals, Mili fucking DISAPPEARS the fucking KIDDY HARNESS fucking NOT GOOD she FCUKING SLIPPED OUT AND SHES GONE AND IM FREAKING OUT

after about an hour or two of searching through the deeper parts of the cavern and tunnel and also fighting a minotaur and discovering an abandoned arena and a cleric, long story. We find Mili fucking laying on A NECROMANCER’S RITUAL CIRCLE WHAT THE FU-

I pull a “I don’t hesitate bitch” on the hooded dude that’s hovering and chanting shit. He’s dead, it’s all swell. Saved the day, the evil’s dead. Mili’s fine she can go back to being a cute lil baby who loves shiny rocks and-

oh wAIT actually Mili is still transformed into a demonic monster and the necromancer dude was actually in the middle of completing a ritual to bring her back to life after he killed her a few times

So turns out, necromancer dead dude was hired by a mysterious someone, to steal something from Talako’s shrine, and to destroy any evidence. Turns out, his methodology for doing so was to kidnap some birb kid who had the misfortune of wander too close, killing them, turning them into some demonic monster that does their bidding, using that monster to steal and ruin some shit, and then when the day’s done he turns them back like nothing happened. Sure do wish he was alive to redo that last part

I’m freaking out, the party’s freaking out, that sword from earlier is cursing to high heaven for no apparent reason. Cleric unhelpfully remarks how it was a bad idea that we impulsively killed the evil dude bro, yes wow thank you for the help

Eventually everything’s fine. After a few round of shouting “NO ONE TOUCH MY FUCKING NIECE OR YOU DIE” after said demonic niece is kinda mindlessly attacking everyone, we eventually do some good ol blunt force trauma and a bit of magic and BOOM. Mili’s back. Although they do have permanent black ritual markings on them but its fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinee (its not)

We find a note on necromancer dude bro that his employer was from another island, so that’s a lead yay Find Out Next SessionTM but at this point I really don’t care as I’ve already started tying Mili to my chest and walking back to the village

I go back to Zekk’s house, hand off Mili, explain everything that happened, give a super heart feel apology about how I pretty much killed Mili (even though I really didn’t but also as we all know Illeka is an angsty birb who’s steadfast in the idea that their existence hurts everyone they love so yay <3) and then I leave as fast as I can before anyone can protest sure was nice visiting my family after i’ve been away for a few months sure am glad that my inner thoughts about staying away weren’t justified whatsoever hmmmmmm

A session or two passes. We try to assassinate and elf’s evil parents and fail, we get into a Fake Dating Being Someone’s Children Au with a dragon. The selkie keeps trying to date everyone, even thought they’re already married to a necromancer princess and a boat (long story) and inbetween we head to that island that note i got was talking about and turns out it was to a place where all your inner demons and anxieties manifest into reality and taunt you, until youre slowly broken down to the point where the evil dictator on the island can “magic” away your problems with puppet strings. fun for the whole family!

Anyways, after our party fights out evil neon-blue clones, I get a lead from dictator dude that the employer I’m looking for is a Rito that’s good with magic, and was last seen headed east, in the same direction we just came from. fun.a

So I’m kinda low on leads, other than the fact that theres a magic school in the east, but in between we have to deal with the fact that husboat (again, the boat that is married to the selkie who is also our entire party’s form of transportation across the ocean. wait a sec did I mention that we weren’t in Hyrule? We’re not in Hyrule, this is a flooded land with a bunch of islands. Think wind waker) was being chased by pirates. also these pirates were the ones that raised the selkie, and also they kinda also slaughtered an entire island of halffoots in their time with the pirates, and also that island was the one that the halffoot in our party grew up in. So basically that’s some cool tension and drama. Anyhow, back to moi

One talk about how “no we cannot kidnap aNOTHER priest” to the selkie and elf later... magic school! Magic school is pretentious and I hate it. Everythings glowy, they don’t allow you to fly over the gates. There’s puffy noble middle aged men and children in bedazzled cloaks. There’s magic in the air and I swear I would choke and die on the glitter and rainbows of it all.

Half the party is off getting into cloak fashion, I head off with my dragonborn friend Ness because highfive! We’re the only one’s with morals in this party! Morality pals! (This is saying something considering I am true neutral and she’s chaotic good but we might as well be clerics in this party...)

My morality pal and I and hanging around, then we catch word that there’s this transfer student that no one has seen in a while and “oh I wonder where she could be” and all that jazz from other students. Mortality pals are like “ok let’s go look for her” so we drag the rest of the party off of their larceny spree and look around.

Eventually, after I spot a tattered cloak roaming the halls that matches the description of the gossip, we find the transfer student.

TURNS OUT (unsurprisingly honestly given the way the dm framed stuff) this transfer student is someone I know. She’s standing there, in the middle of the room, preparing to do some ritual or something. She’s standing there, my life purpose, my one and only goal, literally the only reason I’m still going in life, my arch nemesis, my target, my mortal fucking enemy. It’s Kala.

Ness sees a demon dog in the background and says hi, ruining our element of surprise, but to be fair, she doesn’t know it’s Kala.

Kala whips around from her table thing. We make eye contact. Her face suddenly shift from confusion to surprise to bewilderment to shock to happiness.

Happiness.

“Illeka I thought you were dead!” Kala runs towards me, but I’m too shocked to move.

She’s smiling. It’s not sadistic, it’s not...harmful, it’s just genuine joy. For a moment I thought I saw a tear in her eye.

Kala hugs me for a long moment, before letting go. “So how did you survive?”

...

In my head I’m thinking, “oh you fuck face”

THE. AUDACITY. OF. THIS. BITCH.

“HOWD I SURVIVE” UH NO THANKS TO YOU FOR ALMOST KILLING ME FOR YOUR STUPID RITUAL WHATEVER THAT KILLED TALAKO WTFFF

ARE YOU REALLY TRYING TO PULL THE SAME TRICK AGAIN??? GONNA PRETEND TO BE ALL SENTIMENTAL AND NICE JUST TO TRY AND KILL ME LATER ON? HA OK OK

how about instead, I do the one good thing, the one worthwhile thing I can do in my entire life...just one simple course of action that might hope to make up for the mountain of regret that is my entire existence.

I am finally going to kill you.

Kala’s staring at me, eyes curious, head tilted as if all she ever did was ask what I had for brunch.

I blink once, and my neutral expression, faintly coated with shock morphs into determination.

I roll for initiative.

- - - - - -

It’s 1am.

So have a cliffhanger, kinda.

If anyone bothers to read this far, congrats! Your reward is me being lazy. I’ll tell you what happened sometime tomorrow if anyone really wants to know :P Long story short, it doesn’t end how I, and therefore probably you, would except.

#haha brain go- shamelessly talk about Illeka for 3 thousand words #i actually dont know the word count i didnt check i think it's 4k??#the thing i copy pasted is like 2k and the campaign stuff i added is....idk #not botw kinda #rito oc #kinda #dnd #kip talks for too long #i'd write this better but its 1am #good luck if you can actually read this

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newleafover · 4 years

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OK my top 10 niche interests

I forget who all tagged me in this but I think it was @alienfuckeronmain and maybe @progmetallesbian who started this thing? Sorry it has taken me so long that I forgot who tagged me! If you see this and would like to do it too, consider yourself tagged! And feel free to send me/tag me in yours; I love knowing fun things like this about people! For “niche” here I went with “I have never or very rarely talked to someone who can keep up with me on these subjects”

1. Saturns. The cars. The perfect little 90s cars that are pretty much the only American-made early 90s sedans that you still see running on the road today. They’re such good cars. I get excited every time I see one. I am NOT a car guy but I can talk shop about Saturns exclusively.

2. Gerard Manley Hopkins-- like, yes, his poetry, for sure, I am obsessed. I may have his handwritten poetry tattooed on my body. But also his repressed gay SELF. I went through a phase of reading every biography (all two of them) written about him. I had the British Library send me the unpublished poems of the boy (Digby Dolben) who GM Hopkins had a crush on in his youth. He was largely my inspiration for writing Constant Debauchery, actually. I love his sad gay ass very much.

3. Whistle Down the Wind-- because @alienfuckeronmain and I can have hers and little-hers matching obscure Andrew Lloyd Weber musicals. I was so deeply into this musical (which never made it to Broadway btw) when I was 15 and I still know it STUPIDLY well and know the casts and everything. It’s basically Phantom of the Opera but the teenage girl is even younger and there’s SO MUCH JESUS IMAGERY and James Dean references, and there’s really bad race politics going on because it’s supposed to take place in the south but the London cast recording has so few American actors so it’s full of small children doing horrible Louisiana accents, which is amazing. The lyrics were done by Jim Steinman which is EXCELLENT because he’s the genius behind Meat Loaf’s good records and also the classic hits “Making Love out of Nothing at All,” “Total Eclipse of the Heart” and “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” and most importantly the often forgotten amazing 80s girl group Pandora’s Box. He’s amazing because if some lyric or melody (or entire song!) he wrote didn’t get enough attention, he just REUSES IT and puts it in another project. So there are entire verses in WDTW that are just straight up lifted from Pandora’s Box’s album. I just love it all so much, it’s so bad.

4. Lar Lubovitch’s Othello-- this is the gayest ballet I’ve personally ever seen done by a major ballet company. I know there are probably gayer ones. But god do I love Iago/Othello on ANY given day, let alone when these amazing dancers are doing an incredible intense homoerotic m/m ballet pas de deus about it. I can hardly find ANY pictures or videos of it online, but the whole ballet is on Youtube (and features Yuan Yuan Tan, who is a treasure.)

5. Celia Johnson-- Maybe she’s not really obscure or anything but the level to which I think she’s the most beautiful actress and went out of my way to track down all her movies is probably unusual. I have a big problem about Sagitarrians with beautiful brown eyes.

6. I don’t know what to call this one and it’s definitely weird and appropriative, but it’s like, creepy sounding choral music? Usually some kind of Christian? and very old/traditional? Preferably with single-gendered choirs? Let’s just say the Russian Patriarchate Choir is in my top 10 most listened to artists on Spotify and I am NOT proud of it lmao.

7. The Puzzle Place-- I don’t think enough people watched this show in the 90s. It had great songs that still get stuck in my head. It was also so much about the one white guy in this friend group of POC (puppets of color) learning about privilege and sensitivity, but without him becoming the main character or the center of the show (like at all).

8. 1980s Washington DC hardcore-- If Dischord released it in the 80s, I listened to it at some point. And I especially listened to the early projects of Guy Picciotto from Fugzai. I don’t love how much I know about these white suburban boys, but I do know a lot, so there we are.

9. Early Elton John-- his first albums, BEFORE Goodbye Yellow Brick Road. Maybe this isn’t niche after that movie came out last year, but I can talk about different demo recordings of songs and stuff, and when Skyline Pigeon started at the credits of The Favourite I flatlined a little.

10. Psychobiddy movies-- I do have a blog dedicated to them that I never get around to actually doing anything about. So mostly we just watch them and collect the DVDs. But if anyone wants to chat about the lesbianism in What’s the Matter with Helen? or Who Slew Auntie Roo?, I’m down!

I can’t believe I didn’t even talk about Banjo Kazooie...

#the puzzle place #psychobiddy #dischord #Celia johnson #lar lubovitch's othello #sf ballet #saturns #gm hopkins #Gerard Manley hopkins #whistle down the wind #wdtw #jim steinman

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kataracy · 5 years

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My job just does not care that rent is like 400+ huh cool cool im about to go awf under this read more if yall dont mind

FREGIURGTTKJLKKSAKDSFKAFSLJL GOD FUCKING FUCK?WHAT IS THE DEAL FFFFFFF ok story time:

So I work at corner bakery cafe its a weird fusion fast casual place where i make $9/hr, less than what i’ve made from my last jobs but incredibly close to where i live like deadass across the street. So I have a manager that I steadily don’t get along with, he’s a blowhard. He picks a person to be mad at for the day, he hovers, he treats the girls there like his personal punching bags and I noticed all of that and started to dislike him to the point where I just couldn’t work with him.

I would go in on days where he would close, because i work the night shift (my job favors the day shift btw. They only care about having people work in the day shift the dont give a fuck about night crew is ridiculous how much the dont clean up after their shifts and we have to pick up behind these grown ass women) and i would noticeably make little o no effort to converse with him, I just went in, did my job and went home.

He would write me up for not saying hi to him. He would constantly start telling the GM I was being insubordinate when i was literally doing everything good at my job except talking to his sensitive ass. So I complained to the GM. I begged him to not put me on any more shifts with this manager because i was Tired of getting written u for nothing and I was tired of not having fun at my job. I was getting anxiety attacks while working with this dude it was so bad because again, he HOVERS. HE STANDS IN THE FRONT WHEN THERE IS OTHER STUFF TO DO AND JUST FUCKING HOVERS LIKE CAN YOU GO FIND SOMETHING TO DO and my GM said ok its fine we know (BECAUSE THE DONT LIKE HIM EITHER WE LITERALLY WOULD TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH WE DID NOT LIKE THIS DUDE OK NONE OF THE MANAGERS LIKE HIM) we will try not to put you on the same shift, we’ll let Z (the scheduling manager) know and if u do have to be scheduled with him make sure you find a cover and we’ll tell him to leave you alone because we know you know how to do your job.

So. That was a fucking lie.

They keep scheduling him with me. I tell another manager I don’t like him and why and he says I get it I’ll let B (GM) know.

So I keep getting scheduled with him. And how the hell am I supposed to know when because, the managers have an entirely different schedule thats just their shifts and its fucking private. They end up scheduling me with him again and again and I just don’t show up one day I let the night manager know hey im not coming in on these 2 days, i found someone for this day but not this one so i hope yall find someone.

And then the next day, im getting called by a coworker like hey where are you are you coming in and i say no. no im not. i gave the managers plenty of time ( a whole fucking day) to find someone else bc they know i dont like working with this man. i said im not coming in repeatedly. im not coming in. but the coworker keeps fucking picking at me and saying hey they dont have anyone can you please come and then i get so pissed off i say im on my way and when i get there the fucking manager says you can go home i found someone.

I get so pissed. Why did you keep calling me then?

I didn;t call you they called you.

and the coworker that kept calling me and making me feel guilty for not wanting to work with this man who makes me uncomfortable and pissed and anxious, is my boyfriend. My fucking boyfriend decided this job was more important than my feelings that day and it was beyond hurtful dude im tearing up just talking about it because god it hurt, it was like a dramatic ass betrayal (AND THAT JOB IS SO DRAMATIC BY THE WAY THEY WILL GET SO FUCKING UNCOORDINATED OVER A SMALL RUSH ITS THE STUPIDEST SHIT)

So I go back there and im so angry now. Why have you been blowing up my phone to tell me to come in and being so dramatic. There arent even any customers in here. Why did you keep calling me asking me to come in when they already found somebody.

They just found somebody.

So you could call me and even come back home to fucking say they asked you to come get me> But you cant find the time to pick up the phone again and send a quick nvm?

The next day im scheduled. Another write up from the manager who loves writing me up. because he couldn’t be a fucking manager and just find a replacement no, he had to call and tattle-tell on me to the GM for nothing. I get called in to office by the scheduling manager.

So GM asked me to have you read this, its a warning. I heard you have problems with B and I din’t know that.

I find out they never fucking told the scheduling manager. they lied to me to just keep me coming in.

And... listen. look. I get that everyone in that place must have a complaint. I get that the managers must hear complaints all the time but. just because they do, does not mean my complaint matters less. Im a young woman who is uncomfortable working with an older male manager, how about yall give a shit about that at least. This job didnt care about me the entire time and that hurts even fucking more.

So now, im only getting two days. Because instead of the other managers just stepping up and working the easy night shift, instead of being accommodating and considerate, they decide to just shit on my feelings like this.

The last time I went in. the manager is fucking talking to me because thats what fucking happens. The more you work with someone like that, the more they get use to you not liking them and being uncomfortable with them and they decide they dont fucking care, that they dont have o be accountable. that they can just keep messing with you. My last shift was so anxiety riddled I had to excuse myself 5 times (I counted the tissues) to go fucking cry because of how awful it felt to just, be surrounded by so many people who have the power to do something and yet, decide they just dont feel like it.

He keeps his shifts and i have to deal with having 2.

He works on salary, I have 9 dollars an hour.

my bf and i had to move out of our 1 bedroom that we share with his dad because we needed the space and rent is an extra $100. I broke my glasses last month and cant afford to get replacements so i have been straining my eyes faily. I have to pay a full internet bill from my account and my bf gives me half of that. the dog wont stop fucking barking and giving the cat fleas. My mother and I dont speak, we have no relationship. I dont want to ask my aunts for money any more than i already do, i have no family out here, i only have like 3 friends that are close enough to visit and even then, i dont have a car and “close” equals driving distance and... i’m just

I am so exhausted haha. its been such a long few months. The ups and downs are there but, the downs have been so much more amplified lately its hard to see a silver lining so i just, idk, I dont know. I do not know.

I got our new schedule today. Only two days. This ko-fi stuff and this commission stuff guys its what i have right now. Its what i need to work because nothing else is. lol im not a begging person, im not like... this. Im not so open but, i could really use any help right now, please. Just share the links, if u dont see something u like maybe someone else will, and that hope is the only thing i can look forward to right now. thanks for reading this far if u did. thanks for listening to me yell about avatar for all these years thanks for following me and giving me notes and making me laugh and making me smile and im burned out after all of this so, take care guys.

#this is more a main blog topic but i consider this my main blog since i interact with this one more than my other even though im trying #to leave tumblr #it is so hard to type without glasses im like putting my face on the keyboard to be able to see the screen pft #after this post goes up i will reblog my com sheet again if i havemt already #i need to lay down my cramps are killing my back and in hindsight thats probably why im so openly emotional rn

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dilfian · 2 years

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i am going into work 😶 so brave. .

#xoxo #just have 4 hrs left. . .ahhhh. . .#i hope gci isnt there LOL b said he wasnt yesterday but idk if he came in later or not #if he does a 2p onwards i'll be long gone whoo #if he does come in. . .oh well. . .guess he'll just have to put up with me doing my job with help #im so over the managers saying ppl cant help. oh yeah? then die.#its going up to 86° but theyre predicting rain. . oh shoot at like. 8a too. yeah i'll get ready and then go in as soon as i can.#ok gm btw<3

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onepiexe · 2 years

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sitting in the passenger side for the first time in. months. maybe all year? except once.

#logbook #god it feels so weird. i hate not driving lol.#i have this built in self coping whatever i guess abt driving and i never want to delve into it.#and its just always understood that im driving if i'm going too. and since they wont let me drive on interstates it'll take longer.#my mother always runs behind and she made us behind this morning and shes like i will have to drive bc the interstate is faster #and also your car is a mess and im like. great. wonderful. love that.#i dont have anything to fill my mind with so it just drives me nuts. thats all.#and. . other things. anyways. im not having a good time.#i sort of feel like taking a nap lol im so exhausted from this week. and i went to bed late. and woke up a few times. again.#i hope everyones doing ok<3 gm btw<3 #mother mention

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rickygoldman34 · 2 years

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Hello everyone Ricky Goldman here.

Its BTW:Gold Rush. Lucas Jackson the GM comes out and introduces the ring announcer The Jock who brings out the commentary team Jim Bailey and Drill.

First match is Helena Razor vs Jack Roberts in a date match. If Jack wins he can take Helena on a date but if Helena wins Jack must leave BTW forever. This is definitely my 1st time seeing a date match. Ground game starts out Helena quickly takes control here even hitting a suicide dive to Jack on the outside but back in and Jack takes over. Helena tries to fight back but to no avail. The referee is just awful at being in position at the right time. Jack got quickly back in to this no matter how much Helena fought she got close here but a low blow and a roll up gives Jack Roberts the win.

Next up it's the gold rush rumble featuring BTW guys James Reid,Nishiki,Axel Strife, Chris Stone and Davey Getski GTM guys Andrew Jepson,MC2,Joel Cobra,Dave Douglas and Gung-Ho Mutley. Drill complains James gets eliminated and him and Drill brawl. Many more eliminations happen. It's down to 3 men or so we think. Andrew Jepson gets eliminated its down to the wrecking Crew they hug but here comes Strife he eliminates Chris but Chris then helps his tag partner get his biggest win ever. Davey Getski with the win here.

James and Drill come brawling from the back Lucas makes it a match. My 1st look at James here this was a very hard hitting power move after power move match. Drill heel here for this one. I enjoyed this one very much so. James is good and one to watch Drill ofcourse controlled the action here this was a fairly quick match that had Drill getting his 1st win in BTW.

Well it was meant to be Bentley one on one with Stoxx but Bentley stood on the 2nd rope and the turn buckle broke so interval time. After the interval the match happens it's no holds barred. Both guys pull out wrestling moves mostly ground game but Stoxx has had enough and brought out monster engery drinks,changed his boots and the fight was on. They brawled everywhere and all over. A steel chair,kendo stick even a sledgehammer was introduced into the match. A ladder and lego was brought into the match also. What a match,what a brawl and what a war. I loved this match. This certainly went the distance with both men pulling out all the stops but it was Bentley coming out on top of this one here.

Next up its Maverick Matt Williams vs Aston Steen. My very 1st look at Aston here he who seems to have a creepy vibe about him. Another good match here Aston impressed me it was mainly ground game Matt seemed very conscious of the broken turn buckle but still this was great back and forth action between both men here lots of pin fall attempts and submission attempts here. The match ends with the home town boy the man himself Maverick Matt Williams tapping out Aston.

Next we got triple threat action Alfie vs Hasley Rose vs Harley Hudson in women's action. My 1st look at both Alfie and Hasley here. This was a very quick,rushed fast paced match. Plenty of pin fall attempts and not much time to actually see Alfie or Hasley work. This was an Ok match with not much else to add except Harley Hudson took the dub.

Tag team action is next Alex Boylin and Jack Johnson vs Kenimen and Dynamite Lee Dawson. This was another fast paced match I reckon they were limited on time all 4 men looked great with many pin falls from all 4 men. Keimen and Lee looking on point but not for long as their opponents took over. Keimen and Lee were a great here so good infact they got the win.

Now its MAIN EVENT time!! Its Davey Getski vs Gareth Angel vs The Rarebit 2 out of 3 falls match for both the undisputed BTW title and the GTM world title. This is certainly a big match for Davey here. Alot of fast paced action with all 3men looking good especially Davey well that was until Gareth pinned him to retain his title. Davey,Chris and Gareth do the shield triple power bomb on Rarebit but it doesn't keep the big man down for long as he destroys,stacks and pins both men to hold onto the undisputed BTW title. After the match out comes new Number one Contender Bentley.

It was another good show and I give it 6 stars out of 10.

Dont forget to add me on Facebook Ricky J Pate,follow me on Twitter @ricktherock30,go and check out WWA on Facebook and go and like and SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube channel the people's wrestling channel.

Ricky Goldman out.

#wrestling #youtube

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fuck-customers · 7 years

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One day half the pool was closed for cleaning but it would open after a few hours. As cashier, I told every customer this before I touched their money. Only a few people left. A young kid, about 10 comes to pay. I let him know, he says it’s alright, pays, and enters. Five minutes pass, and a slew of kids and an Angry Suburban White Mom come to the cash box. She asks for a refund for the one kid (the rest had season passes) and starts ranting about how “it’s awful that we have to pay for a pool that isn’t technically open.” I tell her we don’t offer refunds (it’s posted on the big admission signs), and that makes her more mad, “oh yes you do.” I get my GM, GM asks if they were told about the closing before they paid. The ASWM says “well I don’t know I wasn’t there” and turns to the kid. Obviously, kid says yes. ASWM is in shock for a moment. GM says we can’t offer refunds, and if she leaves they’ll have to repay admission at another pool (we’re 1 of 3 pools). She asks to talk to GM’s boss. GM says ok, prepare for the same answer. She eventually leaves in a huff over that kid’s $4.

If she didn’t want the kid to repay for another pool, she could’ve asked for a stamp that would grant entrance to any other pool that day, instead of immediately asking for a refund btw. Worst thing about this is the example it set for those kids in how to treat city employees.

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andrewuttaro · 5 years

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New Look Sabres: Preseason GM 3 - TOR

I was foolish to believe that the Ristolainen drama would ever end wasn’t I? Here I was being all cute coming up with Sabres Avengers after a boring preseason game thinking this countdown to disappointment wasn’t going to march on relentlessly in the city that never sleeps on sports disappointment. Three games into the preseason and we’re yet to see Rasmus Ristolainen play a second of competitive hockey. The rumors are the same, they haven’t really changed meaningfully in a couple months. But with every passing game the closer to Opening Night you got to think a Trade becomes more likely just because of the relationship falling apart. I don’t know. Ristolainen or not I was already angsty something fierce. It’s preseason hockey, yes; but in the words of my favorite Leafs blogger: IT’S PRESEASON HOCKEY! You look to see if players are bad because they suck or just rust. Everyone not named Ristolainen or otherwise injured has now gotten a whack at preseason ice time, so nobody is particularly rusty. The Leafs brought the majority of their A-Team while the Sabres didn’t quite bring the Amerks as much as they brought the Amerks plus the shit that doesn’t work on the Sabres. Vladimir Sobotka and Remi Elie were on the top line against… John Tavares. Ok, sure whatever. Preseason promise! Oh… it’s real hard for me to not care about the result of these games when the Bills were undefeated in the Preseason and are yet to be beaten in the games that matter. I was going to rage into this game one way or another and I got to say: I actually wasn’t that pissed off at what I saw from the team from Buffalo.

So first things first: the goals against Linus Ullmark were not on him. Linus played his 40 minutes in this game like a dynamo: seeing pucks through traffic, sprawling out to make second and third rebounds (Rebounds he shouldn’t have to stop btw). He made a wicked toe save at one point! While this defensive group had Jake McCabe, Henri Jokiharju and dark horse John Gilmour, there wasn’t a lot of great defensive play from the Sabres. When there was there was too much diving around for my taste in a preseason game. Seeing Andrew Hammond in a Sabres jersey is still something to behold for me. This game was fun in spite of the lopsided result. The credit for that goes to our three stars of the game: Dylan Cozens, Casey Mittelstadt and Henri Jokiharju. All of them played very well in the O-Zone, particularly in the middle frame where I really think they tested Fredrik Anderson at times. Those three plus Conor Sheary, Arttu Ruotsalainen and… dare I say it: Vladimir Sobotka, were all good on the attack. I mean Sobotka occasionally transforms into a giant cement median but when he was in human form he looked somewhat serviceable. Cozens was fast and transitioned zones with possession like he’s been in the NHL a while. That kid is likely going back to Junior, but he looked NHL-ready in this game. I’m not saying he’s actually NHL-ready, but he looked the part in this game. Casey Mittelstadt on the other hand did a lot of the things we need him to do to eventually shore up that 2C role. He was winning puck battles and forcing guys off him. Noted numbernerd Chad DeDominicis had some fancy corsi for and against stats in the second intermission that showed Mittelstadt not only holding his own but doing pretty good creating chances 5 on 5 against the Matthews line! He kept the puck in the zone on several occasions and I thought I was seeing Jack Eichel out there. Of course, Jean-Sebastian Dea has Eichel’s old 15, so I was confused about that in general. Jokiharju NEEDS to make this roster. He looks like such an upgrade in terms of possession and passing; those categories have been painfully lacking for the Sabres in recent years, particularly from defenseman. And while we’re talking about guys that probably get sent down but are making a strong case they shouldn’t: Arttu Ruotsalainen was getting more scoring chances than not and was a +4 in scoring chances. This is not to mention he was dragging Kyle Okposo and the bad version of CJ Smith down the ice. This is all to say once again that this game was more enjoyable than I excepted.

I’ll repeat my unpopular opinion: I didn’t mind the Sportsnet broadcast. I like seeing things from someone else’s perspective. It may require us to listen to Leafs stuff that isn’t particularly relevant to us, but I prefer it to the College Hockey quality streams we got from Sabres.com earlier in the week. As the third period touched off with the home team up 2-0 you wouldn’t be wrong to think maybe a goal or some more fun was in order from the visitors. Unfortunately a lot of the good stuff I just described more or less evaporated in the third period. This one ended 3-0 Leafs. I mentioned I felt compelled to rage going into this game preseason or not, but it turns out the rage I was expecting to have was…opposite. I’ve been struggling to stay optimistic. I like to think of this blog as Buffalo’s premier optimist outlet. I wrote a page of angry dribble before this game started and ended up putting it all on the chopping block. This game had enough good stuff going on that I found myself upset at the folks seeing nothing good in it. Look: if you’re seeing an A on Sobotka’s chest and thinking nothing has changed with this club it’s hard to argue when the biggest offseason acquisition was Colin Miller. But if preseason means anything than in this case it means encouragement: the Sabres B Team just played to the Leafs A Team level for at least forty minutes out there. Who knows what happens tomorrow! Add a Jeff Skinner here and a Rasmus Dahlin here and I think this matchup will be fun again this year and maybe, just maybe, we can see some progress toward a sweet, sweet spring clinch next year. Just let yourself be happy with them for a minute. I did and it completely turned around my evening.

While cuts were fully expected after the Columbus game and only came in the form of Matej Pekar getting sent to the Barrie Colts, the Rochester Americans Training Camp starts on Monday so if there aren’t cuts tomorrow morning there will definitely be cuts on Sunday. You may have also noticed through three preseason games New Look Sabres postgame has seen some cuts. I’m writing a little bit slimmer and not just because it’s preseason. Perhaps meandering around for two beefy paragraphs isn’t as good as quicker topical ones. That’s what I’m trying; and it would be helpful to get your input while you’re liking, sharing and yes, commenting on this blog. I know you’re reading; I can tell by the other engagement metrics. I just don’t know why it would kill you so much to let me know what you think. I know there are some reply guys lurking out there. Let me hear that opinion burning a hole in your head. Look for New Look Sabres on tomorrow’s game on Sunday. I got a busy weekend ahead and decided it would be a good time to let one of these games breathe a little bit before I write. In the meantime, a hardy and heartfelt Let’s Go Buffalo!

Thanks for Reading.

P.S. I sincerely do like Auston Matthew’s mustache. If you know my look you know I have an unhealthy appreciation for facial hair so this opinion may not be surprising.

#buffalo sabres #hockey #blog #nhl #Toronto Maple Leafs

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