#okay so here's the deets on the leverage au

[words-writ-in-starlight]

prompt: modern MDZS, Wen Qing berating someone as she does DIY bullet removal

Leverage AU, huh?  Sounds like you want to talk about a Leverage AU.  For this H/C ask meme!

“Everything was under control, Wen Qing,” Wei Wuxian says, smiling through clenched teeth.  There’s drying blood gluing his slacks to his skin and sweat beading on his forehead and throat, but his hands don’t tremble as he lowers himself into a chair.  He at least has the good grace to sit at the table, so that she’ll have somewhere to put her supplies.  She’s going to murder him anyway, but it’ll be much more convenient to kill him in a kitchen chair than on the couch.  Wen Qing likes her couch.  She intends to keep it blood-free.

“Clearly it was not,” Wen Qing half-snarls, and she snaps a hairtie around her bun to keep her hair out of her face as she glares down at him.  A quick rummage in her pockets produces several purple exam gloves, liberated from the hospital during a shift and forgotten.  “A-Ning, get me a towel from the kitchen, one of the flour sack ones, and a bowl of warm water, and the shears kit from the junk drawer.  Everyone else, figure yourselves out, I’m not running a daycare.”

A-Ning, who’s always been a good boy even if Wen Qing is taking pains not to know what he does with his time these days, vanishes like a cat into the kitchen.  Mianmian, who has sense, promptly knocks her knuckles against Wei Wuxian’s head and says, “Be good, Yuandao,” before she flops down onto the couch without regard for her regal evening gown and apparently goes to sleep.  Nie Huaisang, who knows when he’s no longer needed, picks his way across the room to Wen Qing’s only armchair, and folds himself up like an origami figure that looks very unlikely in his suit.  

Lan Wangji, who has never done anything convenient in his life, remains standing beside Wei Wuxian’s chair and blinks at Wen Qing.

Wen Qing has no idea why everyone pretends Lan Wangji is completely unreadable.  He couldn’t be clearer if he printed make me move, I dare you on his forehead.  He’s smeared with blood, all down one side from half-carrying Wei Wuxian to her doorstep, and he’s bruising up blue on one cheekbone, and there’s a table knife tucked into the pocket of his suit jacket, bent out of shape into makeshift brass knuckles.  Wen Qing doesn’t really feel like fighting the point just now.

“Fine,” she snaps, “just stay out of my way.  And you,” she adds, pointing at Wei Wuxian.  He cringes a little, because he’s smart.  “We’re going to have a talk.”

“Jiejie,” A-Ning says, reappearing with towels and trauma shears in hand.  She doesn’t twitch when her brother pads up behind her and lays the lot on the table.  Wen Qing is used to her brother drifting around like a ghost, and to his wide-eyed expression of trying to get on her good side.  “Don’t be mad at him.”

“I am very mad at him,” Wen Qing says.  “Bring me the water or I’ll be mad at you too.”  Wei Wuxian snorts out a breathless laugh, and Wen Qing grabs the trauma shears from her tidy pack of tools to shut him up.  “So,” she says, crouching down and briskly cutting up the seam of his pants toward his knee.  “What the fuck happened?”

“Got shot,” Wei Wuxian says, helpfully.

“I can see that,” Wen Qing says, and only barely resists the urge to give his leg a shove and see if that makes him focus up.  She cuts the extra fabric away, straight across the knee crease, and gives a light tug on the rest, just to check if she might be able to get it off immediately.  Wei Wuxian makes a breathy noise, like a swallowed gasp, and she absently touches his calf, a soothing gesture until the trembling eases.  “Can I get a little more detail?  Was it a cop?”

“No!  I’m--I’m just a hacker, people don’t shoot hackers,” Wei Wuxian says with completely false confidence.  “People shoot, I don’t know, cat burglars and hitters.  Lan Zhan’s been shot, right, Lan Zhan?”

“Clearly, people shoot hackers too,” Lan Wangji says flatly.  But then, because he’s weak, he adds, conciliatory, “But yes.  Five times.  It is my job.”

“My brother’s never been shot, right?”  Wen Qing raises her voice at the end, over the rush of water in the other room, and hears a squeak of alarm.

“Uh--that’s right, A-jie!”

“Because I would kill him,” Wen Qing tells Wei Wuxian matter-of-factly.  “And then I would kill his entire team that got him shot.  You understand that, right?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Nie Huaisang confirms from the armchair, because he might be a ruthless son of a bitch when he feels like it, a mastermind whose best game is poker and has the mask to prove it, but he’s also a well-trained younger brother and he’s never once had the guts to fuck with Wen Qing.  “Wen Ning has never been shot.”

“Good,” Wen Qing says forbiddingly.  “Because I don’t ask questions about what you get my brother into,” she continues to Wei Wuxian.  “Just like I didn’t ask questions about how my brother paid for my degree.  But that doesn’t mean you get to show up on my doorstep at eleven on a Saturday night with a bullet hole in your leg, and answer no questions.”

“That’s fair,” Mianmian says, without opening her eyes.  “You have to give her that one, Yuandao.”

A-Ning slips back into the room and puts a metal bowl of warm water on the floor next to Wen Qing’s knee, and then walks into the bathroom, because he’s a good boy and he knows what she’ll need before she can even ask for it.

“This is going to hurt,” she tells Wei Wuxian, quiet and serious.  "Keep talking, it’ll keep you awake.”

“You’re so mean to me,” he complains as she wrings out a cloth until it’s only damp.  “You won’t even let me pass out?  I got shot!  I got shot taking down the CEO of an oil company, by the way, you should--fuck!”

Wen Qing’s free hand locks around Wei Wuxian’s lower leg, a practiced grip to hold him in place as he startles at the pressure on the wound.  “Hold still, and it’ll be quicker.  Tell me about your latest idiot crusade, Wuxian.”

She soaks the blood-stiff cloth until it can be cut away and lets Wei Wuxian’s shaking voice wash over her, barely listening.  Something about an oil spill, and a family whose entire town was crippled when the fishing industry went belly up.  It’s all very idealistic.  It’s all very Wei Wuxian.  They got the guy on camera shooting a civilian, though, which is apparently just icing on Mianmian’s grifter cake of very illegal bank transfers and a burgeoning RICO case.

“Okay,” Wen Qing says, when she’s cut away the rest of Wei Wuxian’s pant leg and exposed the bullet wound--halfway up his outer thigh, blessedly clear of the artery, but clearly a very small caliber, the kind of thing a CEO might be able to get into a benefit without looking excessively paranoid.  Which brings her to...  “Well, this is going to suck a lot,” she says.

“It already sucks a lot,” Wei Wuxian says, and his laugh is a little hysterical.  “What in particular are you thinking about?”

“Next time,” Wen Qing says, carefully dipping her tweezers in rubbing alcohol, “get shot with a bigger gun.”

“Absolutely not.  What?  I’m not getting shot again, and definitely not with a bigger gun, what is wrong with you?”

“This bullet didn’t go all the way through,” Wen Qing says.  “So I’m going to have to take it out.  A-Ning, come here and hold a light.  Lan Wangji, hold him down.”

Wei Wuxian lets out a breath and it trembles, but for all his dramatics, he’s never been a coward.  Once, when Wen Qing was in undergrad and she and her brother were surviving the fallout of the Wen mob going to prison in droves and Wei Wuxian had just been kicked out of the Jiangs, he cut open his palm with a broken glass.  He sat on the floor and let Wen Qing pick shards out of his skin for twenty-five minutes, and joked and teased the entire time.

“Okay,” Wei Wuxian says.  “I’m ready.”

It’s a bad hour, as Wen Qing pulls the bullet from his thigh and then puts two stitches in the hole.  Wei Wuxian doesn’t scream, doesn’t cry, just takes shallow, shuddering breaths and doesn’t move.  Sometimes he even laughs, a ragged sound of apparently genuine amusement when A-Ning wonders aloud if Jiang Yanli is going to kill them before Wen Qing gets the chance, and a bark of vicious humor when Nie Huaisang reports that their target’s been arrested on more fraud charges than you could shake a stick at.

“We’re not telling A-Li,” Wei Wuxian says when Wen Qing finally tapes down gauze and collects her bloodied tools into the emptied water bowl.  “She’ll come look sad at me.”

Wen Qing summarily ignores him.  Instead, she looks at Lan Wangji, who looks nearly as shaken as Wei Wuxian.  He’s not holding him down anymore, but his hands are still resting on those stiff shoulders, a thumb smoothing over the skin at the nape of Wei Wuxian’s neck just above his collar.  Wei Wuxian’s head tips a little toward that side, resting lightly on Lan Wangji’s forearm without apparent concern for the blood on the hitter’s wrist.  Maybe Wei Wuxian’s, maybe whoever got to experience the pleasure of being punched by one of the Twin Jades.  

“Don’t let him do anything stupid,” Wen Qing tells Lan Wangji firmly.  "I can get him antibiotics--you are taking them, Wei Wuxian--but I’m not getting him painkillers, because the second he feels okay he’s going to get A-Ning to teach him to free climb a building or something, and A-Ning is going to do it because I raised him terribly, I guess.”

“Hey,” A-Ning says.

“Tell me I’m wrong.”

“I will keep Wei Ying from doing anything stupid,” Lan Wangji recites obediently, and goes up a few notches in Wen Qing’s estimation.

“We’ll get out of your hair, Qing-jie,” Wei Wuxian says, stirring like he’s going to get up, and Wen Qing stands and sighs and scowls, and peels off her gloves to make a neat little ball of latex in one palm, all the blood concealed inside.

“You can stay here,” she says.  “You can take A-Ning’s room and he’ll sleep on the couch.  Everyone else, you have to get out unless you want to sleep on the floor, though,” she adds, pointing to the two in her living room.

“I will stay,” Lan Wangji says.

“Yeah,” Wen Qing says, already distracted by the odds of being able to find a pharmacy open at this hour.  “A-Ning has a full, you’ll fit.”  Wei Wuxian makes a choking noise, which she ignores.  “I’m going out to get ahold of some meds for you.  Don’t do anything stupid, and lock up if anyone leaves.  A-Ning, don’t let this idiot leave.”

“I won’t, A-jie,” A-Ning says obediently, and Wen Qing stomps into her bedroom to change into something not speckled with blood.

[kekepuaa]

Ladyblogging, part one

summary: in which marinette realizes that the internet is a lot smarter than she thought and that the only way to protect her identity is to join the ranks. identity reveal. adrienette. notes: this is gonna suck to format. irrelevant bit of info here: in this fic, the ladyblog uses wordpress. --

part one: damoiseau in distress [AO3]

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The Ladyblog Alya C., Paris, France.

Join Date:  2015-09-01

Keeping the world up to date on the latest and greatest news regarding Ladybug and Chat Noir.

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F.A.Q.

1.) How do I report Ladybug & Chat Noir sightings? Click this LINK HERE or tweet me @theladyblogger.

2.) How do I subscribe to your livestream? Subscribe to The Ladyblog and download our app! Once you do, push notifications should be activated.

3.) Are you a LadyNoir shipper? I’m an AlyaBug shipper. Yes.

3.) Do you know Ladybug or Chat Noir’s secret identities? No...not yet :)

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Alya C. @theladyblogger 3,421 Followers//1,094 Following

Alya C. @theladyblogger One of the students at my school says she’s friends with #Ladybug! Deets to come! (And possibly an interview!)

Adrien Agreste and 87 others liked your Tweet LadyNoirShipperxo and 46 others Retweeted your Tweet

N I N O @djxbubbler in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger D U D E. Like, real talk?

@theladyblogger in reply to N I N O @djxbubbler Take a gander at my blog, my dude :-)

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The Ladyblog Posted: 2016-04-16 

Subject: Could Collège Françoise Dupont’s Newest Arrival’s Be Close Friends With Our Own Ladybug?

[VIDEO]

Lila Rossi, Collège Françoise Dupont’s newest addition, is making quite an impression on her new classmates. A transfer student from Italy, Rossi arrived to our humble educational facility with a rather interesting piece of news: She’s friends with Ladybug. Amazing, right?  

She was kind enough to share a few words with the Ladyblog, mentioning that our beloved masked heroine has saved her on multiple and has even spoken to her on numerous occasions outside mask. Check out the video and drop a line telling us what you think!

I wonder if she knows Chat Noir too...maybe I’ll ask her later. 

But for now, this is Alya, signing off!

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Comments:

No comments have been posted.

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Marinette Dupain-Cheng would like to think of herself as a very patient girl. Probably a little too patient, given the fact that she had allowed Chloe Bourgeois to flounce around the classroom, running her big mouth and making her fellow classmates feel terrible enough for freaking Hawk Moth to exploit their vulnerabilities. However, for all of Marinette’s self-discipline, there were a grand total of three things that the young girl absolutely could not tolerate in any way, shape, or form.

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Marinette’s Journal Entry Date: 2016-04-16

FILE UNDER: THINGS I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT TOLERATE

I shouldn’t really be venting in my journal since Chloe and Sabrina tried to steal it last September, but whatever, I’m going to do it. (Hopefully it won’t stress Tikki out. Should I keep a separate journal for those events? Maybe...or should I just use codenames? Decisions, decisions...)

Anyway, in this world, there are some things that I can’t deal with. As in, I’m not going to exert energy trying to be compassionate or Hufflepuff-ish about.

1.) Girls who attempt to canoodle with the Love of My Life.

2.) L I A R S. 

3.) Thieves 

Unfortunately, the Liar is all of the above (btw: decided on codenames.) Not too sure what to do about it since it’s kind of dangerous for her to be offering false information liberally...and I can’t really ask Lady Wifi for help...otherwise, she’ll suspect me.

Hm. Updates to come.

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“Marinette, you coming?” 

Marinette snapped her journal shut and stuffed it into her backpack. If she wanted to expose Lila, she had to come up with an excuse and fast. As luck would have it, she had remembered that her mother requested she come to the house around lunch time, as her Uncle Cheng was stopping by for a brief visit and would be gone by the time school dismissed her.

She offered Alya an apologetic smile, “Sorry, Alya. Maman wants me to stop by the house to say hi to my uncle before he goes home.”

“No worries,” Alya shrugged, “I have some major analytics to be checking out with that last interview with Lila.” Marinette almost rolled her eyes at the dreamy sigh that escaped Alya’s lips. 

“You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you have a little crush on the girl,” Marinette commented, a dark brow raised at her best friend. 

Alya scoffed, tucking her cell into her pocket, “Oh God, don’t let Nino hear you say that. We’re supposed to go out to the zoo this weekend to see the panther,” she said, “And besides, he seems pretty taken with Lila too since she apparently knows Steven Spielberg and all these other Hollywood hotshots.” 

God, Marinette shook her head. 

Was it just her or was everyone in this school so incredibly gullible? A little voice in the back of Marinette’s head--a voice that almost suspiciously sounded like Tikki--reminded her that she would probably have believed Lila’s lies had she not been a liar, a thief, and a danger to the Love of Marinette’s Life, Adrien.

Speaking of which.

“Right,” Marinette said, shoving her arms through the loops of her backpack, “Well, I gotta book. Have fun measuring your Twitter analytics, or whatever...”

Alya laughed, “Will do. Oh, grab me pain au chocolat on your way back?”

“Alrighty, I’ll be back in an hour!” 

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Alya C. @theladyblogger  A new hero is on the scene and her name is #VOLPINA! Thoughts?

Simply the Best and 21 others liked your Tweet Nadia Chamack and 11 others Retweeted your Tweet

Chloe Bourgeois in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger Ladybug’s still better than she is.

Bitter Harpy in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger do we really need three heroes? 

Ladybug Trash in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger She’s awesome!! I hope her and LB get to work together more often.

Alya C. @theladyblogger Okay, scratch that, #AKUMAALERT.  [LINK FOR VIDEO STREAM]

Ladybugging TF OUT and 97 others liked your Tweet Nadia Chamack and 104 others Retweeted your Tweet

Chloe Bourgeois in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger Told ya so.

Chronogirl mentioned you in a Tweet @queenbee @theladyblogger shaddup chloe

Alya C. @theladyblogger #BREAKING #AKUMA ALERT: #VOLPINA has taken a hostage

Alya C. in reply to Alya C. #BREAKING #AKUMA ALERT: Adrien Agreste, son of fashion designer @GABRIEL, reported as #Volpina’s hostage

Alya C. in reply to Alya C. #BREAKING #AKUMA ALERT: #Volpina has Agreste hanging from the Eiffel Tower

Alya C. @theladyblogger #AKUMA ALERT: HERE’S THE LIVESTREAM LINK

Petit Papillon and 246 others liked your Tweet You’ve Got to be Kitten Me and 355 others Retweeted your Tweet

N I N O in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger WHERE ARE YOU IS ADRIEN OKAY? 

N I N O in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger ALYA WHY AREN’T YOU PICKING UP YOUR PHONE?

N I N O in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger ALYAAAAAAA

N I N O in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger ALYA. 

N I N O in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger THAT’S IT. I’M COMING OVER.

N I N O in reply to Alya C. @theladyblogger AKUMAS SERIOUSLY SUCK. HANG ON, ADRIEN.

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Chloe Bourgeois @queenbee 687 Followers//996 Following

Chloe Bourgeois @queenbee @adrienagreste ADRIKINS, ARE YOU OKAY??? DON’T BE SCARED, #LADYBUG WILL COME FOR YOU. 

Chloe Bourgeois @queenbee #Volpina’s the worst(tm)

mad max and 12 others liked your Tweet Sabrina Retweeted your Tweet

Sabrina in reply to Chloe Bourgeois  @queenbee Chloe? Should we go to the Eiffel Tower to wait for Adrien?

Chloe Bourgeois in reply to Sabrina @pastelprincess you do it! i forgot i had a hair appointment. tell adrikins to call me when ladybug saves him. 

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Alya C. @theladyblogger #BREAKING #AKUMA ALERT: #Volpina has been purified and Adrien Agreste has been rescued by #Ladybug and #ChatNoir

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The Ladyblog Posted: 2016-04-16

Subject: Saving a Damoiseau in Distress and Outfoxing Foxes

[VIDEO]

Couldn’t snag an interview with the Lady or Alley cat, but here’s some excellent footage from today’s maelstrom. Today’s victim: LB’s “friend” in question, Lila Rossi, who was akumatized into Volpina, a formidable opponent whose abilities are dependent on illusion and deception.

Where does teen model Adrien Agreste fall into all of this? Nobody knows! Yet. 

Luckily, your girl Alya has all the hookups in terms of info. (AKA, I’ll just ask Adrien when I see him in class LOL.) 

As usual, leave all your love (or your conspiracy theories) in the comments below.

This is Alya, signing off!

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Comments:

Response to Saving a Damoiseau in Distress and Outfoxing Foxes Posted: 2016-04-16 Subject: Love...triangle...?????

CatBug: OK OK JUST LISTEN FOR A SECOND...what if...WHAT IF!!!! There was a love triangle between LB, Volpina, and Adrien Agreste????? Judging by the video footage you took, I’d say that LB is digging some Adrien and so was Volpina, which is why she took him.

Remember Jackady? Look at the footage of LB and Adrien. They seem a little cozy, if you ask me :-) (That or I could be totally delusional.) 

ALSO Volpina used him as leverage against LB so she’d give up her Miraculous WHICH SHE ALMOST DID!!! aksljf;asldfjkas;lj.  

Response to Love...triangle...????? Posted: 2016-04-16 Subject: Bruh...

geek-baits: I’m down with that LOL. Poor Chat...

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Response to Love...triangle...????? Posted: 2016-04-16 Subject: (no subject)

chatblanc: You’re looking into it too much. Why would Ladybug concern herself with an ordinary citizen? The only way that’d make sense is if she knew him irl..............

...wait a minute.

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Response to (no subject) Posted: 2016-04-16 Subject: Duly noted The Ladyblog: WAIT A MINUTE! I think we got ourselves a lead here :D 

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Marinette froze upon reading Alya’s most recent reply to the damning conspirator at the bottom of the page. There was no way she’d believe a stranger on the internet, right?

Okay, yeah, no. This was Alya. She was going to search every lead she could get her hands on. And there was no way that Marinette’d be able to act normally around Adrien, regardless if she was in or out of costume. Luckily, her handsome classmate had always seemed to disappear at the sight of an akuma, but still.

The video now being circulated on the internet was enough to set her best friend on her trail. Marinette could see it now: a full-page spread dedicated to Ladybug’s unmasking, which would inevitably endanger herself, her family, and her friends, but she couldn’t exactly discourage Alya from snooping without coming under investigation herself.

Marinette threw herself back in her chair with a sigh, whirling away from her computer to face her wall, covered in photographs of Adrien. 

Could she act like her heart wasn’t running a marathon when he was close to her while she was Ladybug? No, she could hardly think straight around him when they were in class together.

Could she tell Alya to back off? No, because that would definitely encourage her friend to dig deeper. 

Marinette groaned.

“Why don’t you try to talk to her?” Tikki helpfully suggested. Marinette shook her head, her dark pigtails flying. 

“That’ll make it worse, I’m sure,” Marinette replied, “The only way Alya’d ignore this tip--” this very accurate tip that would absolutely ruin her, “--would be for someone to disprove it, with evidence. And the only way for me to do it without raising suspicion would be...”

Marinette stopped as a lightbulb went off in her head.

Of course, Marinette thought to herself, the idea washing over her like fresh air, why hadn’t I thought of this before? 

Marinette swiveled back to her computer, fingers flying furiously on the keyboard. 

“What are you doing, Marinette?” Tikki asked.

“Ladybug’s gonna be doing some damage control. Tikki! Spots on!”

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Ladybug Unknown, Paris, France. 

Join date: 2016-04-16

Ladybug’s Official blog. 

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Ladybug Posted: 2016-04-16

Subject: Obligatory ‘hey-how’s-it-going’ Post

[PHOTO]

Hey, it’s Ladybug. Blogging seemed to look like fun, so I figured I’d hang around you all for a bit. 

xo,

Ladybug

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