#only time its okay to talk abt someones appearance is if theyre talking to u abt it and need support + have expressed the need for support

[piplupod]

i neeeeeed people to think a little bit abt what theyre saying and do a bit of research on shit before they say things to ppl w mental illness and disorders and just general disabilities lol

seeing an uptick of ppl commenting on others bodies "out of concern" esp when those ppl have been open abt having an ED and it's driving me nuts. do not fucking comment on peoples bodies, idc if ur concerned, just say something like "i hope you're doing okay, sending love!" or whatever, no need to make any mention of weight or appearance dear god. i guarantee you that we all know that we look unhealthy. it's distressing esp if you are trying your best to recover. we can't fix how we look until we're at that point lol, it's just upsetting to hear ppl say "you look so skinny!" or "you're not looking very healthy!" when we cannot do anything about it more than we're already doing

[brw]

Tony Stark and Reed Richards for the character ask thing

TONY STARK

how i feel about this character: 😬 ngl i... don't care for him. at all. i don't vehemently hate him, there's definitely times where i appreciate him & his personality but it's few and far between and i... genuinely do not get the hype. i think its mostly mcu fans' fault for my dislike, its just he's fucking EVERYWHERE now, it's impossible to miss him? like he plays a big role in EVERY avengers comic now, he gets ongoing titles all the time, and it's just so frustrating especially when you consider characters who used to be more or less on the same level on them (like hank pym! who, by the way, has been dead for 6 consecutive years! that would never happen with tony!) or even more popular than him now get streamlined because of the mcu's popularity. by himself, i don't really mind him that much, but with how famous he is now and how large and frankly annoying his fan base is i just... now really do not like the character.

all the people i ship romantically with this character: short list here; reed, because i find their dymanic of reed as someone who does everything for his family and will do everything and anything he can to protect their interests above everyone else but also wants to keep his hands clean and believes, genuinely, in the good of the world, and tony as someone who will do horrendous things in the name of the greater good who always has the bigger picture in mind interesting. i also don't know a lot about it but he seems cute with rhodey? even if i think rhodey deserves a bigger chance to be his own character away from tony as is sometimes denied i can always appreciate a good best friends to lovers dymanic :)

my non romantic otp for this character: um? i honestly don't know 😭 i don't like him enough to say, i guess him n reed again? him n rhodey again? help 😭😭😭

my unpopular opinion of this character: he does not deserve the fame he has. like, i dont mean to sound jealous or whatever but pre 2007 movie he was not the most well liked character or even that popular. like obviously he had fans because he had solo series on and off for a very long time but it just feels SO ridiculous that tony stark has a bigger fandom than the fucking fantastic four. THE FANTASTIC FOUR. marvel's first superhero team, and yet??? like okay. he might have things to offer i don't see. he obviously does, i mean, he got three movies and multiple solo series. but he has most certainly not got enough as a character to overshadow the fantastic four, the x-men, etc and i will never forgive the mcu & mcu fans (and mark miller, he deserves blame too) for making it so. again, by himself he's fine but it is ridiculous to me that a one note white character that appeared in his third film (harley keener or... whatever) has 2000s more fics than THE PROTAGONIST OF INTO THE SPIDERVERSE, MILES MORALES. it is just... so vile and frustrating to me.

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: he didn't exist <3 jk jk um i'm not sure? i guess it would be funny if he was like... stick thin underneath the armour. like idk. he's in the armour 24/7 it makes sense to me for him to be a skinny little nerd under there. like completely fucking small. like you can't be a superhero AND be a billionaire and avoid all those taxes AND run the avengers AND run multiple massive corporations and still work out... even if you take away eating and sleeping there's just not enough time... it would be funny if he was just a tiny little boy underneath all that djndndbf

my otp: gonna say him and rhodey again. like i say, can never resist a good best friends to lovers dymanic.

my cross over ship: jdjshdhdh literally none i don't think about him enough to consider it <3

headcanon fact: 100% think he was the one to offer reed that money to star in a p*rno it's just so funny to me to imagine dhsnndnd

REED RICHARDS

how i feel about this character: HE'S MY BOY! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH! like i guess it's paradoxical considering how similar he is to tony in some ways but man i just love reed so much. i so genuinely think reed richards is what tony stark fans want him to be. like they (mcu fans) make up elaborate headcanons of him being a good dad and an ethical billionaire and its like no that's reed richards? canonically he's gone broke bc he refuses to get money off his inventions... u have the wrong man... anyway he's also an asexual LEGEND i do not take criticism and ofc. autistic icon. literally he's so autistic it makes me <3 i love him dearly.

all the people i ship romantically with this character: it would be easier to list the people i DON'T ship with him lol. sue, obviously, victor ofc, and ben are the big ones, but i just LOVE his dymanic with t'challa and i think they would rlly work it... i also love the idea of him with namor, idk with victor it's just so funny to imagine reed as like. bizarrely attractive to rulers of foreign countries. blackagar faces the same problem <3 i also do believe him n hank pym dated in college for a bit... all their weird little microaggressions towards each other just makes me feel that way... again i do like him w/ tony and i made this weird au where he and emma frost got together which if prompted i WILL talk about. probably. more but yeah <3

my non romantic otp for this character: while i do LOVE them together as lovers i just love. benreed generally <3 like they're LITERALLY besties they love each other sm and i'm tired of pretending they don't????? so many people ignore this relationship and it makes me so sad!!! they're best friends they love each other fight for each other fight with each other theyre literally besties... smh put some respect on the benreed name 😤

my unpopular opinion of this character: i don't think this is that unpopular but it is in certain circles so! i genuinely think reed is the best marvel dad! like you can talk abt others all u want but the fact is that reed is the only character i can think of who has always been there in his kid's lives and has consistently put their needs first. like not saying other characters are bad but even at his worst writing he's always done his best for his kids and certainly has been full of love for them. other characters at their worse have. murdered their own kids <3 genuinely he's the best marvel dad and sure there's not a lot of competition but. yeah <3

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character: I WANT A CANONICAL AUTISM DIAGNOSIS NOW. literally he is SO autistic & there are... no big autistic marvel characters! at all! literally none! the closest we have is legion (who was written in an incredible ableist way and autism hasnt been used to describe him in a solid 30 years) and monet (and it turned out it wasn't monet but one of her twin sisters impersonating her :/) so it would just mean so much to see a canonically autistic character like reed who is older & has a wife and kids who he loves and who they love in return on panel. like so much of the rep we DO have is like, young kids or teens and idk an autistic adult would just mean so much to me. especially one like reed who is as selfless & loving as he is.

my otp: tie between doomreed and reedsue! any option that gets this noodle nerd lots of love i'm good for tbh

my cross over ship: him and ralph dibney from dc should date... they have so much in common... stretchy autistic man who's very smart and kind of silly who loves his wife sue who pegs him 🥴 they'd have so much to talk about sjbdhdhd also imagining the look on ben's face realising there's TWO of them is. so funny.

headcanon fact: he's aromantic he's asexual and neither of these stop him from his very meaningful & passionate relationship with his wife :)

assorted character ask game!

[k-dokja]

"some men don't know theyre hungry until they eat" with akaashi pls (YES u prob know who i am bc i talk abt him a lot but shhhhhh im on anon anyway)

This quote fits Akaashi so well.

People often associate youth with years of high school romance and friendships, the blooms of love and the growth of inexperienced hearts. Akaashi had never categorized himself as someone who cares much for love, not for the lack of interest, but simply because he saw it as something that would come naturally with time. There is no need for rushing, when it comes, it comes, and Akaashi is not one to join the race to usher along something that he believes should come from the genuineness of the heart.

He never expected it to come in the form of the bright smiles he saw in passing during the opening ceremony. The smiles which weren’t even meant for him left a lasting impression that remained in his mind even until days later. Somehow, the image of the person with that beautiful smiles stuck with him even after friendly faces blurred into each other and new acquaintances was made. Old memories were replaced with new ones, but the one about who tugged his heartstrings stayed even while those around it moved on.

What he’d call the first official meeting between the two of you occurred in such an insignificant manner that he had doubts you’d remember it later on when the two of you finally got together. You passed him at the door of his class, he noticed you even before you bumped into him but failed to step aside on time because he was captivated by the sight of you, the surprise left him speechless and rendered his motor system useless.

“Oops, sorry!” 

“It’s—”

Your apology was quick and rushed, he didn’t even have the chance to say a word to you before you walked past him to reach his class president. 

“—Okay.”

To him, you were the girl that stirred up the butterflies he didn’t know they were residing in his stomach. 

To you, he was another unfamiliar face in the crowd, one to be left forgotten had it not for the second encounter. 

Akaashi thought at the time that his crush was silly, something he could ignore effectively without you around to remind him that he couldn’t take his eyes away from you if he wanted. It sounded superficial and out of character for him to be attracted to the appearance of someone, to be mesmerized by the surface level instead of what was underneath.

He should’ve known back then the crush didn’t simply come from his attraction to your pretty face, but also the friendly, approachable presence you exuded. Even from a distance, he had subconsciously known the person you were underneath. And one day, he would come to understand that he always loved everything about you, not just only what was available for the eyes to see.

It’d take a while until he saw it, 

Fate had a peculiar brand of humor and when he got roped into their wheels, Akaashi was left fumbling for navigation. It was strange and intoxicating at the same times, he couldn’t help but wanting more. And soon, the chance would be within his grasp.

“You know her, Akaashi?” 

Instinctively, his eyebrows twitched at long-drawn call of his name. However, upon seeing it was none other than Bokuto, an upperclassman from volleyball club, Akaashi smoothed his expression down to a passive neutrality. He would’ve thought his interest in you will get overlooked with the bustling atmosphere of sports festival and the hustle of participants running back of forth.

It would appear that he overestimated how occupied Bokuto would be.

“We only talked a few times.” Too few to define that there was anything between the two of you. It was the honest truth and he didn’t know if he wanted to do anything to change it, yet. He didn’t know enough about you to make a move, there were always other troubles that got his attention. 

He’d deal with that later, or if he was lucky, then his feeling would go away on its own. However, he never expected Bokuto would be the one to deal with that problem for him.

“Do you like her?”

“I—”

“Are you shy about it?”

“No, actua—”

“You probably don’t know how to approach her right? Let me help!”

“Wait—”

Before he could stop Bokuto, the older boy had already ran towards your direction and left Akaashi behind in the dust. The shock scarcely had a chance to wear off before Bokuto began to chat animatedly with you. Even with your surprise at Bokuto’s sudden approach, you fell into pace with him quick enough. Akaashi would’ve admired you for that had it not for how worried he was about digging a hole and jumping down there for good.

To his pleasant surprise, you actually smiled at him between Bokuto’s rapid chattering, not in his general direction but at him. Your eyes gleamed and his heart skipped a beat. Warmth dusted his cheeks, but the sensation was nice and he couldn’t say that he disliked the attention.

Within moments, Bokuto waved him over while you kept your eyes trained on him with one of your signature smiles. That was it then, the inevitable once Bokuto decided to join in without asking. Akaashi inhaled a lungful to steel himself for what coming next before finally making his ways over to you and Bokuto. 

“Akaashi! I was just asking her to join the three-legged race with you!”

The sentence alone gave Akaashi three types of migraines and a headache numbing at the back of his skull. He had to physically stop himself from sighing aloud before he forced half of a smile on his lips. 

“Bokuto-san, why don’t you go check on our teammates? I heard earlier that they’re planning to join the cavalry battle.” Akaashi suggested, not entirely a lie, but it would have the desired result. 

As expected, Bokuto light up at that, the grin on his face was blinding. “Really? Why didn’t you tell me earlier?! They would’ve needed my help!”

With Bokuto out of the way, Akaashi’s strained smile changed into a worried frown when he turned to you. “I hope he didn’t bother you too much. Bokuto-san meant well but he’s often overenthusiastic. I understand if his eccentricities have we—”

“It’s fine, Akaashi, isn’t it?” You smile at him brightly. “Shall we get to the race then?”

It took him a moment to fumble over his next words and whatever fluster he had when you accepted the invitation so casually. “Okay,” he mirrored your smile with his own, ignoring the growing affection bubbling underneath his chest.

Maybe it wasn’t a bad thing that Bokuto intervened after all.

[zontiky]

okay so i tried to save this ask as a draft and it got deleted because tumblr is just such a functional website like that <3 but the prompt was “the hargreeves as ghosts in the apocalypse with five” or something like that i’m going to scream

this is SUPER long so i’m putting it under the cut hfkjsd

pre-five: the hargreeves siblings are dead. wait i feel a drabble coming on ooh

The Hargreeves siblings are dead.

Ben isn’t very aware of this at first. He’s been dead since 2006 -- he’s quite used to it, by now. What he is aware of, first, is light. Blinding white light. And Vanya, in the middle of it. He doesn’t close his eyes because he can’t feel pain, but if he could he thinks she would have made him blind. There’s light, and heat, and power, and then he closes his eyes anyway because the ceiling is collapsing around him and it’s instinctual.

When he opens them again he sees ash. Ash -- and Klaus.

He’s gotten used to Klaus, too. Klaus has a memorable sort of face; even if he didn’t, Ben has seen it every single day for almost twenty years. He doesn’t know if it’s actually been twenty years, for him. He doesn’t know how time moves for ghosts. Klaus has assured him it moves the same as it does for the living. Ben isn’t sure Klaus, stoned out of his mind, bleeding sluggishly from his arm, knew what he was talking about.

Anyway.

Klaus.

He’s wearing the coat he’s been flaunting around for the past week. His shirt is see-through, with little stars on it, like a pale imitation of the sky. Ben remembers his pants had laces on them, he’s sure they did not a minute ago, before the brightness that threatened to wipe out his very soul -- his soul is all he has left, really. His gaze drifts down anyway, to check.

Yes. Klaus’ pants have laces up the sides.

“No,” Ben says. Klaus is laying in a heap on the ground, his fingers curled like his tendons have been cut.

His lips feel numb because they always feel numb. Because Ben can’t feel at all. He takes a step. “No,” he says again, louder, surer. “No!”

Klaus looks up at him. His makeup is smudged, like it tends to be. His lips are bitten raw, like they tend to be. His hair is a mess, like it tends to be, and like it will be, always, because Klaus isn’t breathing.

Klaus is lying in a heap on the ground. Klaus is standing above his own body. Klaus is reaching for Ben like he’s hoping to touch him for the first time in years. Just when Klaus’ cold, dead, fingers brush his face, a voice from behind says, so quietly, dripping with disbelief: “Ben?”

Ben shuts his eyes and wishes desperately he could cry.

He feels a hand on his shoulder, for the first time in so, so long, but he also doesn’t feel it at all. He feels-but-doesn’t-feel someone turn him around, until they are saying, “Ben? Ben!” and he has no choice but to open his eyes and face the music.

Diego is gripping his shoulders like he is a dying man and Ben is the answer. Behind him, Luther and Allison watch them, stunned silent. Allison’s hands are pressed to her mouth. She looks like she wants to cry. 

And Vanya. Little Vanya, painted white. Her head is hung as her shoulders shake with the weight of the destruction she has so inevitably caused. (Ben would say he always knew she was destined for great things -- but he can’t, because he didn’t.) (Nobody ever said great things had to be good.)

The Hargreeves siblings are dead. Their bodies are strewn across what is left of their childhood home, smouldering and burning, and Ben is very aware of that fact.

righto anyway. so they have an emotional reunion but its also kind of bitter? id have to actually write this for it to make sense so lets skip it for now lol

five shows up

he cannot see them obviously bc theyre all ghosts

god if i did write this it would be such a monster of a fic and would take me like 2 years to finish i already know fhkjdsk

somehow ?? they manage to influence the world around them maybe? idk maybe now that klaus is dead hes sober

or maybe hes high for all eternity?

for the purposes of this au lets say he died sober or in the late stages of withdrawal, and bc ghosts cant feel pain in action hes sober

so EVENTUALLY they figure out how to corporealize bc klaus is like blam wham ghost powers

asdlfk that sounds so stupid im sorry

he would say that tho imho,,, it sounds like something hed say,,,

if i DID write this it would be alternating povs also,,,

ok so out of all of them klaus and ben have the most experience homeless

and while being stuck in an apocalypse is not at all the same thing as being homeless it does help to have some knowledge

five doesnt eat the twinkie!! good for him

dammit okay. theres 2 options we can take here. in the comics five couldnt get back bc he fucked up his math and spent 15 years doing the wrong thing, but if u apply that here, with 6 other ppl checking his work this could be avoided and they end up skipping the whole assassin shtick and just hopping straight back to 2019, ready to prevent the apocalypse

OR five still gets hired for the commission but the sibs are tagging along

i think bc five isnt completely alone in this au unfortunately dolores doesnt exist :((

for each other the 2 paths tho theres also options?? bc they (ghosts) can go back in time and inhabit their past selves bodies? OR they could just,,, cease to exist

IM JUST NOW REALIZING HOW MANY PATHS THIS COULD TAKE,, AAH FUCK

okay gonna split this into parts. this is gonna be so long brace yourselves.

1) they go back in time because math checking and the ghosts swap out for their past selves

after multiple years of being stuck in an apocalypse together i think they would learn to get along with each other. like at least a little bit

which would make it easier for them to prevent the apocalypse

bc theyd:

trust each other more

already know abt the apocalypse and not have to wait for five to grace them all with his knowledge

are working as a team from the very beginning

have open lines of communication

yeah uh. so there

vanya is also already aware of her powers so the whole harold goading her into turning against her family and snapping to wipe out all life on earth thing? yeah that doesnt happen

oh and harold wouldn’t know how to do that in the first place because klaus wouldn’t throw out reggie’s journal! this solves so many problems wtf

there’s still commission issues bc they (and by they i mean five) are on the commission’s radar

so there’s still dope fight scenes sdlkfd pinky promise

okay idk. they stop the apocalypse and everything is okay the end hfkjd

2) they fix the math but only five can go back and the ghosts cease to exist

this is just sad! it would be sad okay! im sad! lets move on

subset of the past one: ben CAN go back with five because he was already dead and time travel affects them differently or something idk

aaaaaa

five & ben dynamic duo would be dope as shit BUT five would not be able to see him... so they use klaus as a middleman fjsdsfd

is there 2 bens? is one ben deleted in favor of the time-traveling ben? i dont know! i dont know my brain is melting

either way shit is happening yall!! obviously klaus is clued in, directly or indirectly it doesnt matter but he is on board the ‘don’t let the entire world end in flames’ train

3) they join the commission and then when five goes back in time they all go back

this is fun because now five is a highly trained assassin who is also lowkey a complete marshmallow for his siblings and once again TEAMWORK WOO

basically the first path but now five has a gun fhsdjk

4) they join the commission but five has to leave them behind and they cease to exist

five with a gun but hes sad now

i didnt go into how much losing his siblings would suck in the prev path but like. it would suck so much. he’s already lost them once if you think about it when he time traveled the first time and yeah he found the adult ghost versions but,, its different

and now suddenly hes stuck with these strange adult versions of the people he knows and he KNOWS them but also he doesnt? at all? they dont have all the years of shared experiences together? and theyre all grown up from the first ‘set’ of siblings he had which for five was like 40+ years ago??

SCREAMS

i have losing my mind disease (self-diagnosed)

subset: five has to leave them behind but they still exist because the commission is out-of-time kind of? idk but they’re still floating around somewhere and come back to impact the plot later or something

yeah idk. literally just wrote them down bc i didnt want them to die^2 hfkjwehd

subset: they still exist but instead of being just Somewhere they’re specifically at the assassination of JFK onwards because thats where five left them and they either go on ghosting and make an appearance in s2 OR they cease because them-wise they havent died yet but that doesnt make sense because ghosts can time travel so nevermind

i dont have the brain energy left to explore this one aaaa

okay jesus christ i think that’s all

I DON’T KNOW. i don’t know. i might write some more of this because honestly it is a very fine flavor of angst + hurt/comfort <3

[kingsofneon]

ayyy its me coming in here!!! i have no requests off the bat but uhhhh ok ok hear me out. acesabo but with like. a finger kink or something? like, long pretty fingers fingering the hell out of each other or just sensually sucking on it, idk, i'll let you decide. OR, more expansion on robinkoalasabo, blease?

look okay look im just. vibing with sabo/ace rn so i gotta talk abt them but real quick i love argumentative best friend/enemy / qpp koala/sabo and both of them liking robin, LMAO !!!!! bitch!!! that shit’s hilarious. robin i think would be uhh....unused to such honest attraction? yah sabo’s a lying liar but there’s a difference in his...sarcasm vs his “I’m telling a lie so you don’t know the truth I dont want to tell you”, is what i think. so idk in what i set up i guess we have ko/ro first and Kinda girlfriends (im.....ded for fro/bin tho soz so absoLUTE we have not-yet-together-kinda-feelings-but-complicated-bc-trauma robin/franky + bc theyre not together the...flattery + enjoyment of koala’s personality and company...) friends w/ benefits didn’t-really-date but like each other a lot. and koala so sunny and happy buuut also spending Lots of time with robin - just hanging out but also sexy fun times - and sabo’s like “no I’m not sulking shut the fuck up” (but he’s totally sulking because he Liked robin too, she was someone he respected highly and she! knows! luffy! he doesn’t say anything to her about it bc he’s guilty as fuck but. boii wants those strawhat stories and he can’t sneak them out of her with koala taking up all of her attention.) 

koala picks up on his grumpy mood but just figures he’s being a dick abt smth, but robin’s like nah look, pattern, and koala’s like oh. OH? 

idk what they do but w/e we be vibing with nsfw, which is sabo’s. sabo’s fucking fingers man. the tensile strength. BUT ALSO he’s not very delicate, not very good with flexibility, so robin,,ho fuck boi. when against koala the dichotomy of the roughness vs that clever stroking, but then also bRO im thinking about sabo viewing masturbation etc. pretty clinically and also Be Careful Of Strength, ain’t gotta lot of time to jerk off when you’re running the revolution u know.

so like the first time robin tops im fucking laughing. koala’s probably just as rough/efficient as he is but robin...robin can unlace him in like a minute flat and figures out real quick that sabo likes being edged. the first time robin touches his prostrate..........boi. 

anyway omfg that was longer than i thought so hand kink + sabo/ace

FIRST 

if you haven’t read.......second chances (https://archiveofourown.org/works/15495015?view_full_work=true).........what are you doing. look at this shit:

“You want to watch me jerk it like this?” The buckle rattled with Ace's gesturing, and Sabo's eyes immediately fixated darkly on the belt. “Then I uh, I get to make a weird request too.”

“If you must,” Sabo replied, sounding the exact opposite of beleaguered as he discretely wiped the spit off his palm. Ace cleared his throat.

“Put on your gloves.”

Ace refused, refused to look away from the devious delight spreading across Sabo's stupid face.

“Oh Ace,” he purred, those damn fucking gloves appearing in his hands out of nowhere (did he have them tucked in his pockets this entire time?). With deliberate motions, Sabo smoothed the leather over every finger, and flexed, like he was about to whip out one of his ryusoken moves. “Are you sure you just want me to jerk off in these?”

“Well if you've got any lube tucked away,” Ace shot back, “now's the time to pull it out, put on a good show.”

Sabo's consequent exhale was nowhere near the flippant-and-suave chuckle he had clearly been aiming for. Smugly, Ace counted a point in his own favor before dropping onto his back and finally—finally—undoing his pants. As his own belt fell with heavy thumps to both sides, Ace brushed aside all the pesky cloth, and applied pressure in earnest with a sigh of pleasure.

and this

And boy was it a view. The gloves were incredibly well-worn, molded so tightly to Sabo that Ace could see the full articulation of his fingers' every curve, every bend. The buttery leather, lighter in color at the fingertips, glided over Sabo with the barest whisper of friction. Ace could see his grip change, pressure shifting as he held himself tighter and tighter, grunting in frustration.

“Can I take these off?” Sabo finally requested with a hint of a whine. Ace suddenly thought of Marco, and how he might smirk at that tone, if he was here. “It's not working for me.”

“It's working fine for me,” Ace did his best to leer, thoroughly enjoying his own bare hand's capacity for friction. Sabo made another sound of protest, and Ace gave in with a snort. “Fine. Just one hand.”

“It's all I need.” The right glove disappeared as fast as it came, and Sabo arched high and satisfied into his own hand, now skin-to-skin. He obligingly let the gloved hand remain in play though, skimming teasingly up and down, grinning sharply at Ace's open mouth. “Hey,” he ordered, “go faster.”

AND THIS!

“Anything you want,” was Ace's breathless answer. He didn't stop, even sped up, gripping hard and fast and chasing that finale. “You can have it from me.”

“I would chain you down,” Sabo snarled, practically a threat, only the blade was turned wholly inward toward himself. Like he was daring Ace to give him absolution. “I would bend you 'til you're ready to break, and keep you there for hours. I would make you beg for release, but deny you anyways. I would see your skin dark with my bruises, I would, I would—”

Ace's hands twisted hard against his binds, wanting genuinely to be free of them for the first time since they started this—and Sabo's reaction was instantaneous. A flex of haki into his fingers, and Sabo was slicing through the leather of his belt, letting Ace loose with an expression of terror.

And Ace dragged himself across the bed until he could cup Sabo's cheek in his clean palm and pull Sabo into a biting, filthy kiss. He was still hard as sin, and thrust forward into Sabo's hands to let him know—

“Anything,” he panted into Sabo's mouth, meaning it with every fiber of his being. He didn't mean for Sabo to cut open the belt; he had just wanted, so badly, to feel Sabo's touch. “You have me.”

bitch. bitch. 

idk just gonna write some prompts bc this looks long

sabo + jerking ace off while wearing his gloves + barely washing them (to ace’s embarrassment) bc he claims he likes having evidence of ace. they’re usually kept for when he’s at home tho, sabo’s gross but not that gross ;p (and ace would probably die LMAO)

 SORRY BUT THE POST I JUST REBLOGGED ABT HOLDING YOUR THUMB DOWN TO HAVE NO GAG REFLEX UM. Ace says he wants to try it but it feels weird so sabo’s like. ;) okay and runs his fingers over ace’s mouth, tapping and instructing him to hold his thumb down. tracing his teeth and teasingly not dipping his fingers down low enough, till ace glares at tries to argue smth like “this is not testing the trick” but that’s when sabo presses on his tongue, down his throat, and ace half-chokes on it. sabo just like ‘not like you have much of a gag reflex anyway’

was thinking abt this the other day but ace doing sabo’s nails and then being like dont ruin them! no touching until they’re dry but sabo’s like but idk when they’ll be dry???? bc he’s never used nail polish before and ace is like :) better not touch then as he teases sabo

ace ofc painted them gold and red bc theyre His Colours and the next day when they’re dry and pretty sabo spends ages running his hands against ace’s skin, fascinated and worshipping of how pretty ace is

before they started dating and when they were bad at handling alcohol, sabo kissing ace’s knuckles made that boi CATATONIC, his wrist would also make ace bolt bc Horny, he’s fucked when sabo kisses his wrist it’s just too...intimate. 

 headcanons, headcanons, they’re both pretty calloused in different ways...ace is like rope burns and shit, longer across his palm and knuckles, sabo has palm base bc of his pipe, but they’re confined, and then on his fingertips bc of dragon claw. AGAIN thinking about mr fast fuck brutality here like the STRENGTH in that boy’s hands wtf

ace’s hands have more scars, sabo has more callouses/micro-deposits bc he knows hand to hand/doesn’t start with a DF. 

idk where im going with that last one guess it’s just headcanons abt hands.  

that’s all fox, i like the number eight and i have so many other asks to do lmao

[zhuhongs]

Here’s my long ass review of TGCF that literally no one asked for it i have opinions and I have no one to tell them too so i must write them out and post them. (also part of this is abt the mdzs novel bc i can’t not compare them and I have a lot of thoughts abt that too)

This is very very long so it’s going under a read more. Spoilers ahead!!

Okay so first off this book was a fucking behemoth i can’t believe i read all of that (minus the extras) in under a week.. what the fuck. I definetly got reading fatigue halfway thru book 3.

I’m gonna separate my thoughts into sections bc i  have a few points that don’t all relate

firstly, overall writing and organization:

I said it earlier but tgcf is a lot more structurally sound than mdzs imo. My biggest criticism of the MDZS novel (minus the bad sex scenes, homophobia, and general I hate mxtxness of it) was the way the flashbacks were presented. 

Like OH MY GOD they were presented so badly. I hated that the flashback was told intermittently and only when one of the characters invoked the past. For example, when WWX meets Jiang Cheng and a second time, Jin Ling distracts JC to release “Mo Xuanyu” bc he saved his life in the Nie Ancestral hall earlier. WWX then proceeds to be the self sacrificing dude he is and take away Jin Ling’s curse and put it on himself. When he escapes and returns to LWJ, LWJ offers to carry him.

 If you watched CQL, you know exactly what LWJ is referring to when he says smth to the effect of “You once offered to carry me too, remember.” HOWEVER in the novel you don’t know what he’s talking about. This is because the flashback wasn’t been revealed to you yet. The next chapter goes to tell the flashback. I think that this takes away all of the emotional depth away from the scene. But in CQL, having the flashback already be known, you make the connection on your own and are like “awww wangji remembers that.. even 16 years later.“ Its a lot sweeter bc you know what the two have gone thru. At this point in the MDZS novel its barely the 30th chapter or so and you have no real idea what wangxian have been thru together or what reasons wangji has for loving wwx. You just think, well obviously they like each other bc this is a danmei novel and they are the two leads, ofc they have to like each other. But in cql, you learn through watching them that they’re in love. It’s not just like”well they have to be!! its a bl!!”

Okay that was a rlly long side tangent but it makes me so angry. So what did any of that have to do with TGCF?? well tgcf doesn’t have this issue. In fact, i believe that it gains a lot from having the flashback withheld from the reader. 

I really liked how the flashbacks were contained to books 2 and 4 respectively because it adds a layer of mystery. Hua Cheng is a very secretive man so it makes sense for us to not know everything about him upfront. The way that the author teases and hints little things at you make you want to know more, making it all the more satisfying when the truth is revealed. Because in a way you Know that Hua Cheng meets Xie Lian before and you know that he’s the child XL saved during the God Pleasing Ceremony but you don’t know all the details. Like obviously since Hua Cheng is a ghost you know that he’s died and it was likely for Xie Lian or Xian le’s sake but you probably never expected that he actually died twice. Once on the battle field and second when he took the human face disease. I think the difference between these flashbacks and the flashbacks in MDZS result from the length. In TGCF you get two long concise flashbacks that make sense to be placed where they are. Book 2 because you already have a feel and hint at what the characters have been through and book 4 because the White No Face appears again so then you learn how he and Xie Lian met before. It wouldn’t make sense to place book 2 any earlier bc there is no emotional impact. And it doesn’t make sense to place book 4 earlier because you don’t know what the white no face’s deal is so it’d be confusing. In MDZS, you get numerous short flashbacks happening alongside the main story and it makes it hard to piece together the timeline in a way that feels satisfying. Ik a lot of ppl grill cql for having a confusing intro episode and having a rlly long flashback but its much better than the mdzs novel. However the mdzs donghua handles the flashback in the most concise way imo.

Overall i think the way the story is structured is very good and is a step up from mdzs. Also the horror aspects of tgcf are rlly enjoyable and honestly i think mxtx should just write short horror stories at this point. like enough long ass novels chock full of fetishization. just write some fun horror with no romance and call it a day.. pls

Side Characters:

okay so straight up, i think the side characters arent used as well as they were in mdzs bc mxtx wanted to focus on hualian and didn’t want to give the side characters as much focus. This is a weaker point of the novel.

I’ll get into it more below but i think hua cheng was done dirty as a character by having him rlly only care abt xie lian. Since he doesn;t have any real relationships with others outside of xie lian this takes away from having more depth in the side characters. They’re really only related as far as xie lian’s relationship with them. Though thankfully xie lian gets rather close with a few officials and the ones we get to see more of are rlly interesting. I especially loved the reconciliation of mu qing, feng xin, and xie lian at the end of book 5. honestly their relationship was one my favorites and i’m glad they finally said what they had to say to each other after 800 fucking years. Also Shi Qingxuan is a delight. we stan sqx in this house.

The characters i wish we had seen more of were yushi huang (although she didnt rlly want to be there, good for her), Quan Yizhen and Yin Yu. I very much wish yizhen and yin yus story happened earlier on and we had more time with them. It felt strange to have their subplot occur towards the end and it was sort of out of place but i liked them a lot!! i wish there was more to it. and that there was a reconcilation but mxtx hates happy shidi’s doesnt she, (glares at novel jc). Also man yin yu did NOT have to die like that i’m sad.

Also, honestly.. i don’t think qi rong added to the story whatsoever and i have no clue why he and guzi were there. qi rong just pissed me off the whole time and added literally nothing.

going back to yushi huang, i’d like to say for the millionth time that i hate how mxtx uses any of her female characters. like we get it.. u hate women being useful... im still pressed but what i want to say has been said many times before so ill leave it at that.

Hualian:

I really really did like hualian at the end. They had a truly epic love story and it was so beautiful, especially when hua cheng repeated his words as wuming to xie lian as he started to disappear. But, I said it once and i’ll say it again. I don’t think Hualian is a super healthy relationship. As fiction its fine (i firmly believe fiction impacts reality but let me finish), i guess bc literally nothing about their situation can be replicated irl and none of it ended up containing manipulation or abuse or anything bad but there was a potential for it to and i’m really glad it didnt go that route.

Hualian is a highly idealized and romanticized relationship full of some truly troubling feelings of self worth. While its “beautiful” in a way that hc really was xls most devoted believer, it wasnt healthy for him to live for xl like this. Nor was it healthy for xl to feel so unworthy of hua chengs love.  

Hua Cheng’s devotion to Xie Lian is a little too extreme and it bothers me. When the truth was revealed abt the Temple of 10,000 Gods I had the same reaction as Mu Qing and Feng Xin. I was like... HEY WHAT THE FUCKK that’s a little uh... thats NOT HEALTHY,, dianxia PLEASE say smth. But ofc Xie Lian didn’t say fucking anything and and i was so pissed. Like the whole thing of Hua Cheng living his life solely for XIe Lian is really kinda fucked up and not romantic. I was holding out hope that at some point XIe Lian would sit him down and be like “Hey! I love you and i’m really grateful that all these years you’ve still believed in me when no one else did. But you can’t just live your life for my sake. You deserve love from many other other people and deserve to have a life and happiness outside of me. I still want to spend the rest of my life with you, but you need to not only think of me.” or something to that effect

It bothers me that after Xie Lian learns the truth he doesn’t once reassure Hua Cheng that he didn’t have to make Xie Lian his reason for existence. Like.. idk i just think that’s rlly kinda unhealthy. Like I understand why Hua Cheng is so deeply devoted to Xie Lian-- he saved his life twice and was the only one to ever show him kindness and he’s seen xie lian suffer a fate worse than death multiple times. I get that he wants to protect him and make his life easier, but to not let anyone else into his life and spend 800 years looking for xie lian is just overkill. Like if the whole 10k statues thing never happened i’d be 100 percent fine with hualin but the whole devotion to that extent... uhhh yea.. no that put a bad taste in my mouth. Obsession should not be romanticised. I don’t think any reader of tgcf is going out and deciding to live like hua cheng obviously but still.

Also Side note, the whole 100 swords scene.. bro i felt for hua cheng, the way he screamed seeing that, i don’t blame him. I was so horrified reading that chapter. i don’t think i’ve been so horrified by a piece of media like that in a while. Poor fucking xie lian.. oh my god. I understand the intense reaction he had and how seeing that prompted such a degree of loyalty but still.. 10k statues?? the cave that mu qing and feng xin saw... thats a little too much obssession... like please.. dial it back.. im begging u.

I was talking to mary (liviahyes) and she said smth abt how Hua Cheng doesn’t have a character outside of xie lian. And she’s right, he kinda doesn’t. If Xie Lian didn’t exist neither would Hua Cheng. I get that that counds kinda romantic but in practice i don’t think its a good things. Especially because Xie Lian has a story outside of Hua Cheng, hehas goals, he has friends, he has something. Hua Cheng said it-- his only dream is Xie Lian. Which is romantic but very very unbalanced. 

THAT BEING SAID, i still rly liked their relationship and i think theyre cute they just have issues they need to work through. I mean they have time but yea. It wasn’t perfect but eh. overall i’m bitter bc they couldve been THAT COUPLE but theyre so many bad implications as mentioned above and i.. smh. They still have amazing moments. Like the lantern scene, the alter scene, the “what matters is you, not the state of you”, the end when hua cheng helps release the shackles on xie lian, the scene where hua cheng disappears, the way xie lian waited for him, like they were so close to being THAT COUPLE but then mxtx and her fujo ass just had to make it uncomfortable like that. i’m so bitter. Like the reason why i wrote out all of this is bc this novel could’ve been great but so many little things added up and made the experience far more sour than it shouldve been.

MXTX did hua cheng SO DIRTY by not giving him a character much outside of loving xie lian and being good at everything. Like when I first learned abt how Hua Cheng beat 33 heavenly officials at what they excel in best i was like WHO IS THIS LEGEND but honestly.. he rlly doesn’t have any motivations outside of helping xie lian and I wish he had more to him . Like if we had more situations like the one where hua cheng dug out his own eye to save the group of mortals on mount tong’lu then he’d have been a much more well rounded character. Honestly, that’s rlly the only instance where he seems to have taken xie lians ideals to heart. I wish we had more of that bc that scene was so cool. i wish it hadn’t been revealled so late and there was more than one occasion where he defends others (minus xie lian ofc) without anything for himself to gain that.

To contrast hualian with wangxian, i think wangxian work so well bc at their core, they have the same life goals and same ideas about people and the world. Where in hualian, xie lian has core principles and morals and hua cheng is just like, anything for xie lian. SMH they couldve been great but overall i think hualian falls flat for me because of my own fear of dating someone who doesn’t have a life outside of dating me. Moreso, my parents had this sort of unbalanced relationship towards the end of their marriage and it ended very badly and yea, i just can’t whole heartedly love relationships that in any way resemble this, even if it ends differently. that’s a personal thing tho.

I don’t think Hua Cheng has ANY bad intentions towards Xie Lian or ever will. I don’t think he’s ever manipulated xl or tried to force him to love him. But again, it’s my own personal feelings that makes me feel kinda.. ehh conflicted abt hualian. There was potential but again.. fujoshis ruin everything... smh. Overall i think the way it ended redeemed the issues it had but still there were issues and i really wish xie lian like,, reassured hua cheng about living his life freely at some point but whatever. 

IN CONCLUSION

TGCF had the potential to be better than mdzs, it rlly did but it was bogged down by the authors own toxic mentalities abt love, and mlm relationships, and treating women like ppl and it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I enjoyed this book, truly i did (otherwise i wouldn’t have stuck through and read 750k words of it) but there are some flaws that cannot be glossed over. I hope that tgcf when it does get adapted, goes through the same miracle that cql did and makes the characters more like ppl and less like tropes but i doubt it. Also i highly doubt that a live action tgcf is feasible given the supernatural aspects of the series but we shall see. I’m excited for the donghua when it eventual comes out but i will continue to be critical of the novel bc..well.. you see why. idk if i’d reccommend this book tbh bc like yes i would, no i would... well.. </3. yea. overall, it sure was something that i enjoyed in spades. especially the last 5 chapters. I generally liked it but had many issues with it at the same time, but honestly, yea thats the standard fair for a mxtx novel. 

[sanchoyo]

Mira, Aqua, Persimmon 🍄🍂 Also 🌼 for Cara

Aohhohoho thank you sm I’m so excited to talk abt my kids

🍄 What are your OCs favourite snacks? Their favourite comfort food which always cheers them up when they’re down? Favourite meal to make? Do they enjoy baking and cooking and are they any good in the kitchen?

mira: she loves sweets!! her fav snacks are any kind of tiny cakes or soft, creamy kinds of candies (she isnt rly huge on hard candy) her comfort food is def like, just cake. (since becoming a mew she has random grain/wheat cravings lol) I..think she’s okay in the kitchen? she def has experience bc she always hangs around the cafe, even pre-mew stuff, so a lot of that time is her loitering around in the kitchen with keiichiro jajksdfh

aqua: as a robot she doesn’t really..eat or anything... I think after a while she would ask ryou to make her taste buds and some kind of eating stuff tho? she’d be happy to try anything! I think she’d lean towards cold foods like ice cream bc not only are they yummy, but they keep her system cool x) also, she WOULD be good at cooking, she could just. download cookbooks to her memory banks. altho some of the more delicate stuff like cracking eggs might be hard..she strong

persimmon: her fav earth snack is like. hot chips. her comfort food would prob be an alien dish that would be impossible to recreate on earth which is :( she would not enjoy baking and would 100% be godawful at it, shes never cooked in her life. buuut working at the cafe, she has to stay in the kitchen so customers dont Freak Out abt Alien, so she ...gets better... (lot of dish washing to start...)

🍂 Does your OC enjoy hugs? What do they do as a show of affection for: their friends, their family, their significant other(s) or for strangers? Over all what are they like with recieving affection from others?

mira: huggy, yes hug. do hug. her love language is Making Stuff and verbal praising ppl, like. She will call you cool and make you lil crafts. if she RECEIVES the affection shes quick to get flustered, esp if its a cute girl. she prefers to make the first moves, and gets real red when anyone else does. expect her to hide her face and mumble a ‘thank you’ very quietly

aqua: YES VERY MUCH HUGGY.  her affection/love language is very much touch based or just. very affectionate and will do acts of service for ppl she loves and wants to help them as much as possible!! when someone else gives HER affection, shes way more chipper/happy/excitable all day and glowing, like u can see it on her face!! she’ll thank the person very genuinely and try to hug them uwu

persimmon: not really huggy unless shes In The Mood for one, or knows the person well enough. her love language is very much Buying Things and showering people with gifts. she ..isnt very verbal about it unless shes close to the person. or just Spending time tbh means she likes u (on the flip side, if she doesnt shes just very Avoidant) when she recieves affection shes very ‘of COURSE you love me ;)’ confident, borderline arrogant abt it, but secretly she super appreciates it and gets a lil embarrassed? she gets a lot of compliments on her appearance, but if you compliment smth else (like..personality, or smth she actually worked hard on) she’ll like that a lot but brush you off verbally and act a lil nonchalant. 

🌼 Who are this characters friends and found family? How did they meet, how long have they been friends for, could they ever be something more than just friends? What do they look for in a friend or a romantic partner?

*aggressively trying to answer this for cara without spoilers...*

okay SO her “”friends”” among the aliens would probably be Arilla (queen’s assistant) Saguaro and Pereskia (two of queen’s top brass) Sapote, and Sapote’s older sister. So, basically, half queen’s crew sort of hates or looks down on her for being The Human, but Pereskia finds that sort of thing irrelevant and is only interested in how strong Cara could potentially be, and happily trains with her (sometimes pushing her way too far :| ) But she considers her..someone to learn from, which is close enough as she’ll let anyone. 

Arilla is somewhat protective over Cara as she reminds him of someone and tries to keep her out of trouble (does not succeed) hes got those dad friend instincts tho. but being the extremely uptight professional he is, she takes a while to realize hes been lookin out for her. 

Sapote’s sister is actually in charge of the kid’s area on the ship and kinda functions as a babysitter for all the kids, and its kind of become a safe area for Cara to go and just. Decompress. Sapote’s sister is kind of a pushover and cries easily, so Cara more or less..just..demands to be allowed in and the kids do kinda. love her and shes like ‘??? why???’ but. puts up with them (secretly enjoys it)

 Sapote very much adores Cara, she sees her as a little sister figure and doesnt CARE if shes human, she wants to tease and protect her bc theyre Both the Mews on Queens side, treated as lab rats, and she wants to take the brunt of that. Cara doesnt really realize how much she and the other aliens who like her protect her until later :) 

Saguaro is..a special case. They are  pretty heavily indoctrinated into the Deep Blue Worship Cult, so they think humans are divine, being descended from db. So. you can imagine cara is like. hmm. can use this and take a lil advantage. not great but :/ she has a hard time seein any of these people as genuine friends at the start, and she has a really hard time letting people in in general...that wasn’t always the case.

for a romantic partner she has a Type. 

:-)

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 18

IN THIS EPISODE OF ROBLOX OOF NOISE:

“Yes.” Glynda couldn’t hang up, not without: “I’m—I’m sorry. About what I—”

“It’s alright. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Okay—” The feed cut. Softly, Glynda said again, “Okay.”

GLYNDA DISCOVERS WHY BEING CINDER FALL SUCKS

do u know how hard it is to wake up and play animal crossing whilst knowing this chapter looms over yr shoulder,

OKAY HERE WE GO

She was fidgety; even Cinder mentioned her pacing, shooting a critical eye her way. Glynda sat, intent on stillness; moments later, Cinder mentioned her bouncing leg.

i LOVE it when a chapter calls me out just right out of the gate hahaha who gave u the right

"Really?" How long had they been doing that? How long ago had Cinder noticed? "Should I stay?"

cinder: maybe i should tell glynda abt that /see glynda pacing a dent into the floor cinder: ooooooor i could. NOT give her an excuse to bully them for something to do,

On her way down the street, Glynda couldn't help but stare at the car, its tinted windows revealing nothing within. As she passed it, she kept glancing over her shoulder, expecting an attack or something. But nothing came of it.

HJGDFSGSDFHKGHJDF GLYNDA,,,,,,,,,,, can u imagine being in the white fang, and sittin in yr fuckin. TINTED WINDOWED like BULLETPROOF CAR and yr sat on yr ass watching out for cinder “dumbass” fall and suddenly glynda goodwitch, The Top Bitch, comes out and starts GLARING YR CAR DOWN,,, like ah. i think she knows we’re here. hrm. hm.

i would just like. drive to mcdonalds and get some nuggies at that point.

She had a clutch of flash-images and a wash of emotions and impressions, the raw materials of memory, stored as-is without refining. She was quite used to that—most of her missions were hazy and rough in her memory, mere sketches of events.

i cant wait for glynda to become a vlogger if only so she can actually have physical proof of whatever the fuck happens whenever she goes out and about. get her a go-pro.

It told her: despite her restlessness, despite the arduous journey here, and despite the way Vale seemed to call for her from somewhere beyond the horizon, she felt quite content to be where she was.

the difference having a gf has huh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, u got a whole ass home (being cased by the fang) a real nice city to live in (its floating and atlas wants yr number) a bunch of unread msgs (from a [redacted] who [redacted]) and its a nice day!!! its all coming together. but probably not for very long,

(i got very distracted at this point making a line graph for the animal crossing stalk market so here we go, x2 edition,)

That meant the nightlife would soon begin. She had never liked crowds; too many people, too much input at once. It was hard to focus, to be comfortable.

/chefs kiss

autistic glynda did u kno: id die for u,

Since she’d blocked Ozpin’s number, there was no chance of receiving anything directly from him—but there was still a moment of pause each time she checked her Scroll, as if expecting his smiling face to appear somehow.

OH YEAH LMAO SHE DID THAT SHIT HUH,,,,,,,,,, i still cannot BELIEVE that happened. GOD. cant wait for this to bite her entire ass right off her body,

By the time she reached the top landing, Winter had replied: “I wasn’t aware that you had additional support on this mission, Professor. I will need their full name and Hunter’s license number.”

To answer Cinder Fall and she doesn’t have a license, but she does have several warrants for her arrest felt like inviting Winter to question not only her integrity, but her sanity as well.

SDHGJFKSKGHDJFGJHDKF i cant say what makes this funnier because 👈😎👈 but HOHOHOHOOOOO could u imagine the fallout if she did just, say that shit. if we just went and fuckin said it like it was no biggie--

Finally, Glynda let her shoulders relax, exhaling deeply, like she would before rushing a Grimm. She wrote it plainly: “The clearance is for Cinder Fall.”

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

MA’AM WHAT THE F U C K

winter rn:

She’d just have to wriggle her way out of having to talk face-to-face, then return the game to a field she felt slightly more comfortable with: text.

okay this is so funny to me cause i just keep thinking of her sending ‘no reason’ to oz. a MASTER of textual conversion. un fucking PARALLELED in this field, UNRIVALLED,

Glynda tossed a look at the door as well, her mouth pulling into a line; what if Cinder came outside? What if—

Could Winter track her exact position using her Scroll signal? She minimized the projection of Winter’s face and hurried off in a random direction the instant she hit the bottom of the stairs.

i LOVE these two because this is the first time we’ve rly seen glynda like. Actively do smthng to defend cinder in this sort of way? she’s been pretty passivve abt letting cinder take the lead when theyre together but on her own shes thinking of all the contingencies to make sure winter cant find cinder and u know what. thats gay. what will u do for yr not-gf when yr talking to someone who would kick her ass in a hot second,

also im TAKING to grab choice lines here to comment upon but honestly this next section is SO GOOD that im rly struggling to find a line to encapsulate how much i am LOVING this convo. i cant say exactly WHY im loving it because again thats 👈😎👈 BUT KNOW THAT THIS IS VERY GOOD FOOD AND I AM ENJOYING IT. and im also enjoying this line a lot

Winter’s voice was decisive: “Professor, if you hang up on me, I am flying to your location—tonight.”

winter: if y’all dont shut the fuck up back there i am turning this car, city, and continent AROUND,

It was the same thing, over and over: people didn’t understand her and she didn’t understand them. It was an exercise in futility that only gave her grief. In the end, she gave up on trying to explain herself. She resigned to being wrong, to always being wrong, even when she knew she wasn’t.

OOF OKAY WHAT THE HELL IS UP W/ THIS FIC AND CALLOUTS. HUH??? ME BITCH!!! I FEEL THAT!! AND IT SUCKS,

/reads the next bit

oh are we donning our tinfoil hats? we’re donning our tinfoil hats.

It was so easy. Glynda didn’t stumble over her words even once; didn’t waver. She was built for doing harm. Her anger burned hot and clean; it excised all the hurt like a malignant tumor.

Maybe she really had learned something from Cinder—channeling her frustration, her guilt, her pain, all of it into anger like this was something Glynda was new to. But it felt good. She leaned into it, letting it take the reins; the distressing memories vanished like wisps of smoke, vaporized by the heat of her wrath.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS god this is. SO EXCITING. i also love it when ppl rub off one one another its my FAV thing in the WORLD and this anger is. WOO. this anger is. DANDY. its also a very short-term burst of pleasure glynda so enjoy that hollowed-out whoopsie feeling that i sure get when i Blow Up,

“She butchered my friend!” Winter snarled, the camera shaking as she slapped the desk. “She butchered my friend in the streets like he was cattle! And I have done everything in my power to help you! Everything! To keep her from doing the same to you, and you’ve blown me off or lied or—” Winter’s voice snagged. “And now you tell me—you accuse me—”

It was early evening in Umbraroot, but it must already be night in Atlas. The shadows revealed the unclean angles of Winter’s face: the bruises of exhaustion under her eyes, the lines of stress at the corners of her mouth.

im sorry im just copy-pasting wholesale at this point but OH this is GOOD. i cant rly explain. like. the difference-- because you’d think from the og version this is just a bit more flavouring right? its like getting a bit of hot sauce on yr chicken wings and yr like ‘okay it adds smthng but its not like a side meal’ BUT IT IS A SIDE MEAL this is like a whole basket of fuckin. cheese-baked fries. winter DESERVES this screentime she DESERVES to have presence in this fic and OH does she USE IT im LIVINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Glynda wanted anger. She wanted fire and brimstone. She wanted a fight.

What she got was the glisten of tears on pale lashes. A hand covering Winter’s trembling mouth.

The ashy taste of remorse in her throat.

THERES THAT HOLLOWED-OUT WHOOPSIE FEELING!!!!!!!!!!!!! THERE IT IS RIGHT ON TIME. its like CLOCKWORK,

She didn’t have anything. Nothing against that. The possibility that Winter might truly care what happened to her had been so insignificantly small and easy to trample. She had forgotten about the losses Winter shouldered the moment Cinder had whispered inheritance.

it’s just like clockwork,

also this chapter feels lengthy but maybe its just cause i got distracted with animal crossing so ill have to do a wordcount check at the end

/checks

no its lengthy this is a thicc one,

“I know,” Glynda said. “I know. I know how this sounds. But she’s the only person who makes me feel like—like I make sense.” In her mind, Glynda lay in the darkness of Cinder’s bedroom, watching the glaze of streetlights along her lips as she said you.

you,,,,,,,,, we,,,,,,,,,,,, our,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, its all that gay shit,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

“If I’ve learned anything, it’s that Cinder Fall is a tremendous liar. She could convince you it is raining in Vacuo, given enough time. Two years ago, I was working on the Argus base, where I met her as a client; she told me she was a merchant seeking entrance into Atlas—she had all her documents in order, her entire persona set up, and she sold it perfectly. She was flawless—and all of it was fake. She gave me no reason to doubt her. She was—”

Winter cut herself off, abruptly. Then: “Once I was comfortable and safe, she burned down my office and murdered my friend.”

YES,,, SLOWLY THE LORE PIECES TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! winter is once bitten twice shy, but mayhaps we mean,,, once burnt,,,, twice shy,,,,,,,,,, hrmmmm,

Glynda told Winter everything.

OH MAN,,,, we’re really getting this messy fucking trio up in this bitch i am SO excited. i am THRILLED. here! we! go!!!!!!!!!! also i said it before but again im so glad winter gets to Be Here for this. sure this has nothing to do w/ her destiny or w/e but shes here now. shes in the uber. she waiting outside.

The dying potted plant Glynda had spotted last time on the back wall’s shelf had been replaced with a new one; this one’s leaves were beginning to shrivel at the ends.

dsfjhhkljsdf side note: is this like that scene in finding nemo where all the new fish see the niece and go ‘oh no we’re gonna die’ but instead its plants getting taken into winters office? they go ‘im sorry, mate, but once you go into her office, you come out TOTALLY dead,’

okay so this whole convo happened and if i try to pick one section ill end up picking it all AAAAAAAAAAAAAA im dying out here. WINTER BLEASE,,, BELIEVE THAT SOMETIMES CINDER CAN TELL A HALF-LIE. A SORTA-TRUTH. A SEMI-HEMI-DEMI HONESTY,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

How different would that mission have gone? How different would her life have been?

She found herself saying, “He had so many chances to tell me. Instead, he let me think I was reckless. That I was a danger to other people. I stopped working in teams. I didn’t have many people in my life to begin with, but afterwards was worse. He saw to it that he was all I had, and he let me think it was my fault.”

ROBLOXOOFNOISEDISTORTEDWITHDELAY.MP4

OOF!!!!!!! O O F!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! honestly OOF that shit HURTS BITCH!!!!!!! thats BANANAS. WILD. im also loving (hating???) the increase of painful glynda lore and honestly everyone feels like they have So Much More that builds them up and im THRIVING off it. im also suffering for it.

With the video feed closed, Glynda could see she had new notifications. Missed calls. From Cinder.

Glynda’s stomach lurched. She stowed her Scroll before she could think about them.

At the mouth of the alley, she could see the shape of Cinder’s apartment in the distance. She stood there for a long time, staring, uncertain what to do with her hands, unsure what to do with her heart. Her jaw flexed. She remembered the tears on Winter’s lashes. The friend she’d lost.

Glynda took her first step toward the apartment.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA and so the soft domestic shit ends. but nowhere near as explosively as id thought???????? HUH. H U H. must b because we’re gearing up for smthng honk honk honk

ANYWAY!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. this chap was SO good its astonishing (despite the [several] times i got distracted by animal crossing rip me). WINTER!!!!!!!! BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant believe this disaster trio is coming together. also cant wait for glynda to tell cinder the shit she just pulled. oh no,

(also the wordcount was 5,931. just in case u were curious)

[hyunwoo-archive]

HELLO!!!!!!!!! it's me (failed) theory anon here again the rainbow one and !! can u talk abt how much u love shownu? bc i don't give him as much love as i do with the rest and i wanna hear u talk about him :_) feel free to talk as much as u like though!!!!

hello angel omg !!! its nice 2 see u again :-))))) (also dont worry i never get theories right ... the only time i got smth right w monsta x? guessing that minhyuk was gonna be yesterday) nd ofc !!!! i’m always up for talking abt shownu nd how much i love him fkajshfkjsa im rly honored u came to me ,,,,, me through tears ,,, god i dont deserve this fjhsakj

anyways !!!!!!! i’m just gonna link 2 some Previous shownu essays i’ve done b4 i delve into a New One,,, here’s one two three (someone else’s essay but god i lov this) four  nd i need to start tagging my lov essays bc i cant find the rest rip ....

anyways !!!!! lets begin !!! 

firstable i am so so so in love with his dedication to the group. there has never been a moment where shownu has not mentioned monsta x on broadcast whenever he has solo appearances on variety ?? a rly recent example is master key, where he was asked to choose a number nd he went with 7 bc there were 7 members in mx and its smth so subtle nd small but also it speaks Volumes about how much monsta x means to him!!! like he rly could’ve picked Any number but went w the one that has a strong tie to his group nd that really melted my heart like ?? hes really thinking abt monsta x nonstop ? mbb but like,,, the leader ? its really like !! i’ve never rly seen anyone mention their group as much as he does !!!

moving a lil further into his relationships w the members, u can tell he has a deep connection to every member ? ofc, we dont know what goes on off camera, but on camera (esp if he’s not the current focus nd he’s in the bg) u can see how he interacts with everyone !! hes very caring towards them nd obviously treasures them so so much, nd i get very familial vibes ? its like all of mx are his brothers nd he is someone who grew up as an only child so i feel like its ,,, incredible he has this rly close, sibling-like bond w mx ... like,,, showheon play fighting ? thats smth u usually see a lot w siblings .. i jus rly lov how he has such a deep connection w all the members, nd its smth thats been in the making for probably longer than just two years ? honestly gkjhds i lov watching fancams when theyre at fansigns bc shownu is rly ? interesting to watch ! he teases the members a lot ,,,

whICH is another i wanna focus on jhgkjds i love when he teases the members or like ,,, bullies them . honestly w how ppl stereotype shownu u wouldn’t expect it but he’s rly just as bad as the rest of them fsjakhfjka nd i mean this in a good way !!! an example is at a fansign, he drank all of hyungwon’s coffee nd put it back nd made sure he knew shownu was the one who finished it nd he looked so proud of himself .... plus he has a fixation w pushing everyone younger than him over nd out of the frame nd its really funniefejk

also another thing i lov abt shownu is his humor gahjkds i’ve touched on this a lot in past essays but hes actually ?? really funny ????? his humor is very deadpan nd not really Built on jokes so his unexpected comments are always smth i look forward to !! also !!! he likes to break into random dance nd like ,,,, noah fence but i lov it ... its so cute when he starts randomly dancing ...

nD LET ME TALK ABT HIS PASSION FOR DANCE OKAY OH BOY shownu is the embodiment of a good dancer to me like ??? he moves so fluidly, hes so in control of what hes doing but its so natural ??? nd if u wanna see his improvement i really recommend watching hit the stage bc his growth (esp w his expressions, its smth he struggled w) is incredible !!!!!! he goes from a good dancer to an even better one, nd watching it happen across the span of like 3-4 videos is just ??? wow ???? how u improve that fast ??? lmk ??????

also !!!! his vocals !!!!!!! my god !!!!!!!!!!!! honestly before i got into monsta x, i had some of their songs in my itunes nd i really already fell in love with his voice before i knew the group. its so soothing and soft and he has such an amazing range ??? he can hit low notes nd high notes nd notes in between nd his versatility really astounds me ,,,,, the best examples for this are definitely their title songs (shine forever nd all in nd a bonus to newton !!!!) as well as because of you and gravity (both of which i listen to like,,, Religiously .), nd i reaaaaaally recommend u listen to this video so u can get to hear his range nd gkahsdkj wow his voice is really beautiful :-( of all the voices i listen to, his is really my favorite. i rly hope starship lets him sing an ost one day ,,, i’d Nut

nd LAST POINT i wanna talk abt is his own growth in self confidence ??? honestly as someone who struggles w self love, watching shownu develop w his own self confidence is so so so inspiring !!!! i talk abt this a lot but in debut, he really was silent nd like ,,,, i hate 2 say this but ~robotic~ nd i think it has a lot to do with him not being confident ??? especially with variety, it was really always painfully awkward if he was given screen time but he has improved so steadily over the past two years. hes really like,, the variety king now . nd he’s mentioned a few times he wants to feel more confident doing solo vlives nd u can tell hes become more comfortable w it !!! im really really proud of shownu for always stepping out of his comfort zone nd doing what he doesnt normally do bc he always comes out of it as a more confident person nd its just !!! wow !!!! its really something i admire nd love him for :-(

anyways in conclusion i love shownu for so many things nd pinpointing them is always hard kfjhaj but !!!!! here is my lov essay .... im sorry its so Long ,

[everythingmustgo]

heyO i was wonderin if i could do a tarrot reading and an analysis? if not its fine! but my signs are cancer sun, libra moon, leo rising, mercury cancer, venus virgo, mars leo, jupiter cancer, n saturn gemini! thank u in advance!

hello hello ofc u can !!! my tarot readings r £2 per card used so if u wanna have a look at my tarot page nd pick the spread u want then go for it!!! ill do ya analysis just now !okay so cancer suns r honestly my FAVS like my gf is a cancer nd shes so sweet nd caring, cancer suns want to protect u, theyre very maternal in their loving? very nurturing, they show their love thru looking after u and making sure ur okay. sooooooo emotional, all u water signs r crybabies tbh, ur emotions rly do dictate ur life and ur not in control of them so much as they r in control of u. the kind of ppl that cry from every emotion cuz they feel so deeply. the thing abt cancers tho is even tho theyre loving and caring, theyre always looking out for no. 1. big on self preservation, if they had the option to save u or them, theyd save their damn self no question. if a cancer if upset, anyone elses feelings go out the window. if u nd a cancer r upset, u can bet ur ass the cancer’s feelings come first. this is bc of how strong their feelings r for sure, they just dont have room in them for negative feelings that arent. theres ukno. they need so much emotional support, as caring as they r they struggle a lot with insecurity and need constant reassurance. often the only constant thing in their life is their own emotional turmoil, and they have a tendency to wallow in it and expect others to make it better. this is honestly one of the only bad qualities in cancers imo like I love water signs nd they rly r the most sweet nd caring ppl, they just have Issues nd r fiercely protective of themselves. cancer/libra is a good combo imo!!! libra moons r very diplomatic, have an innate sense of justice and a deep need for peace and harmony. bc this is ur moon sign this would suggest that this is ur strongest desire, this is rly what drives all of ur actions. ur a peacekeeper, u settle arguments nd everyone immediately seems to like u bc of the knack u have to see all sides of an argument. bc of this ur not strongly opinionated, u have principles but ur always open to persuasion and generally look for a balance between two options. big on equality, ur middle ground attitude to arguments can sometimes b mistaken for weakness of opinion but ur driven more by the need for fairness which is v strong in u. bc this is ur moon sign this is the part of u that cannot b suppressed: ppl will always see ur moon sign, nd while u have a certain amount of choice over how much of ur sun sign self u express (ur core personality, often one u grow into nd recognise within urself as u get older), ur moon sign cannot b hidden. ppl will always recognise ur balanced and fair nature, nd honestly for a libra moon this is a great thing bc ppl generally Love libras bc of this !!! they r fair nd will never immediately write off anyones opinions as invalid, somehow finding a way to agree with everyone. plus as an air sign u have great communication skills nd ppl will feel v comfortable talking to u. they have a veeeeeery strong need to b liked tho, which often drives their agreement w everyone. they need a thriving social life and to be in a relationship, most libras feel v lost w/o a partner. theyre romantics at heart, ruled by venus, but also feel they need a strong person in their life to make their decisions for them. this is the libra downfall, they r. wishy washy ppl. sometimes u NEED strong opinions? like even if u desire fairness, nd r immediately uncomfortable when fairness in a situation becomes almost impossible to achieve, there r times when u need to have a strong opinions? the idea of holding an opinion that some people will object to is stressful for a libra. this means ur one of the most indecisive, vague and easily influenced signs and u need to think for urself more!!! libras r all too dependant on others and see the route to peace and inner balance as pleasing everyone, which isnt always the case. u need to take urself and ur own feelings into consideration, be independent. as this is ur moon sign, ur approach to emotions is heavily ruled by ur libra. u keep things to urself as u dont like to distress others w ur emotions or hav them think differently of u bc of it, u see the solution to ur problems as to deal w them urself and problem solve ur way out of it, and while this is a skill of urs and u will most likely come up w good solutions, its not healthy to take it all on urself. I do love libras tbh but. they can b fake as hell w their niceness. u need to let urself open up more nd realise theres more to life than being liked, nd peace can b achieved w/o pleasing everyone, and w doing things for urself. ok ok I rly went to town on ya moon there so ill try nd keep ya rising short, so ur a leo rising which is v different from ur sun nd moon !!! all of ur signs r different elements which suggests ur v well rounded nd have a lot of different aspects to ur personality!!! ur leo rising means that the way u express urself and how others perceive u is far more dramatic than ur sun and moon, honestly u like to b seen as Extra. v focused on ur appearance, sociable and outgoing, loooooves to b the centre of attention. this im thinking is the strongest of ur signs nd fits very well w ur libra and cancer, who hav more vulnerability when it comes to others. leos have a lot of charm and likeability from the confidence they exude, which can likely be a protection for your libra fears of being disliked, and your highly emotional cancer sun. leos are also incredibly loyal and generous, a leo friend will absolutely spoil u and think nothing of spending lots of money on u (theyre v materialistic so often buying things for u is how they express affection). however they do often keep others in their shadow bc they like the attention so much, so its possible that until others get to know u very well, they will feel intimidated by u. u like to express urself dramatically and perhaps as opinionated in an attempt to hide ur libra indecisiveness and dependence on others to make ur decisions, which ur cancer sun will make u feel v insecure abt !!! theres a lot of interlinking insecurity between the signs with u lmao they work well together but theres certainly a lot going on. when ppl meet u, theyll hear abt ur social status and ur charm, but then discover ur sense of fairness and need for peace and equality, as well as ur emotional, nurturing side as they get closer to u.im gonna do a v brief explanation of ur planets if thats okay but if u want more info u can 100% ask for it its okay!!!so bc ur mercury is the same as ur sun sign its likely ur thought process, mental abilities and communication skills r v close to ur core personality and the way u think is an important part of who u r. bc its in cancer its gonna b emotional: ur mentality r hiiiighly emotion driven, and its hard for u not to let ur feelings get in the way of ur thought process and capacity for ideas and planning. ur 100% an overthinker, nd even tho u care for others deeply, ur plans will always result in u reaping the most benefits. ur venus virgo means ur a lover of beauty and a big romantic imo, but also a perfectionist. ur attracted to people u can fix up, which is a big downfall of virgos. they like to fix things, esp ppl, ESP in venus wow. u may notice a pattern of friends nd partners who rely on u to Fix Them, u may notice u r drawn to ppl w Issues bc u want to help them get better. ur a big worrier when it comes to relationships. leo mars wow this is the realm of action and u GO for it. everything u do u do 110% nd u wanna make a big show of it. u wanna b seen as an achiever, someone whos doing great things in life nd lookin hot while doing it. u want appreciation and attention for doing it. p much all of ur actions r to b noticed nd appreciated for what u do, its a big motive. ur in it for u. jupiter jupiter realm o wisdom nd knowledge, cancer again so id reckon important to u. mercury nd jupiter often go hand in hand so its fitting they r the same. again, emotional, again, caring, again, selfish. u have a deep understanding of ur own and others feelings, ur v intuitive nd use ur feelings to help u understand the world around u. ur feelings influence how u learn, if u dont love smth ur not gon learn it. cancer is ruled by the moon, id say ur v wise and trustworthy. saturn is jupiters restrictive counterpart, all abt boundaries nd structure. as its in gemini I reckon ur a fast learner nd once u learn ur lesson u will never forget. u like to scheme and plan, ur intelligent nd sociable but the way u plan ur life may distress u. u may often b highly conflicted over how u structure ur life, part of u loving the control of routine and part of u loving the freedom of no structure whatsoever.hope this made sense !!! u got any more questions let me kno, hmu when uve decided what spread u want for ur reading 💕

[cfriday1304]

astricks r the ones i've said ok. btw this is like a rlly agressive @shitwesaid post ok

*Ya know what's peculiar abt me? I have superior reflexes. That's a good thing. Oh noo! My little flower got stuck under there!1! "It doesn't matter if ur standing, if this bus starts barrel rolling-" *weird noises* Can u pLEASE stOp being gAy???! Hipitty hopitty im about to do this. NOooo hipitty hopitty I'm abt to do this. YeASSSs hipitty hopitty y r u talking to me. It's very masculine to catch an Apple Hipitty hopitty whY ARE U ON OUR PROPERTY There's a ghost in Narnia Ms. Ma'am? No, that's wrong. Lemme snAtch ur wEAVE I seE u Mr. Sun. I harassed U but that's not important. *Get outa here ya fUckin idiOt. And it was just standing over my fucking bed. Watching me sleep. Wut r those hearts for? Oh it's definitely nOt an E-thot thing...! Ms. Fuckin. Netter. Bitch. Whatcha doin? *Tired. Sneaky sneaky sneaky. No. Oof. It's a car. *Got em. I DONT UNDERSTAND, WHY R U BLACK????1!?!1?!?!1!? Hold on. I just got a DM. *singing* I'm gonna get E Coli. I'm gonna get E Coli. GET OVER HERE RIGHT-- *Someone is stEaling my socks. Y do we keep switching? Y don't u shut ur mouth. I saw u harass that other one. I saw it ALL. Hi Susie, hi Zach!! I'm ZaCh. That one PokemEN GAME *excessive laughter* ITS POKEMOOONNN *smacks leg* Thighs. *spRINTS* Ohhhh! Wut? Burger King!!! No- Where is this person, I would like to VANQUISH THEM. GET OOFED. OH SHIT I JUST GOT RAPED BITCH BITCH BITCH WHAT THE FRICK THEYRE BISCUITS THEYRE CRACKERS THEYRE COOKIES *BIOLOGY PUNS R FUNNY GUYS omfg that's the nerdiest thing I have ever said wtf. Shoes r for bitches. Bitch y?? I'm your MOTHER And this cats name, is Bread. *Umm. That has been killed. By Satan. We don't eat ded apples here. Oh it's Friday we cAn be on our phones! *Anguished screaming* I think I'm ready to-FUCK *U don't have to be sexy to be emotional. *Wut the fffUCK DO U HAVE SOMETHING AGAINST BROWN THINGS And we played fUCKING KAHOOT U BETTER GET UR CHILD SELF BACK OVER HERE That's pretty broken. A ShEEP! That's a bull. *I have a giant glass bottle in my pocket. *looking @ cows* is that a...camel??? That. Was beautiful. ThIS IS OUR TREE. *looks @ a snake skin; discusted* ooh is that a turtle skin??! No. It's a snake skin. *Sssssuck it. I got u something betterrrr. Potato chips and baconnnnn. I'm not rlly an adidas guy, I try nOt to buy it. They ate it. They actually ate it. They actually put the paper in their mouth. It looked like u were snorting cocaine. Ya know wut else ain't real? *Ur mental stability. *appalled silence* It tastes like Fortnite!!! Y is that American talking. TAKE IT UR AMERICAN Martha is Gucci. MY LOCKET I just want to take my test. *Yes mAAM 'Yeas ma'am' wut tf is that. Did u find ur dad *solemn* no. *The devil is just Jesus on Opposite Day. Hold on, I'm getting inspiration. *Hipitty hoppity fuck off. *aggressively dies* I say too many random things in that class. *I love this class. I'm glad u can understand that. *T SERIES AND PEWDIEPIE HAVE BEEN FEUDING SINCE 2011????!1!?!?1!?!?! WUT THE FUCK. *God fucking dammit. Do u smELL wut the rock is cookin???? I smell victory. *Who is this cLOWN *HSU is basically that vine where he goes 'what the fuck. Is this aLLOWED??!' Like. Not gonna lie. *light laughter* *Skeet. Do u say that all the time *Yea Uh- *SKEET *Step one to tailgating. Don't do it. Bc. Ur a rookie. And u can't tailgate yet. This is how I fight. *face plants* Ur being rude. No ur being rude. *EVERYBODYS BEING NICE. Nobody's switching to chevy gUYS. The mACarana. *Hush ur mouth. *gaspppp* U SAID A BAD WORD Look at that man. we're gonna be here for soooooooooo long. *slams fist on table* I DEMAND A REFUND. *no. *well, now i'm mad. u facking idiot *hEy. that's kind of assault. *hey, that's kind of assault to children. *presses button* meEp *makeup is for dweebs *we're gonna be expelled from Europe i feel like a fleshling, a flesh bag, a bag of flesh i won by SEveral m & ms. yes, i am standing as well. watch it peck me bc i look like a snAck *looks at boat* that's a big bus. *excessive laughter* *abt to cry* someone just told me fourrrr *drops phone* oW WHAT THE FUNCTION *appalled silence* *says the pessimistic optimist. *ya know that feeling when u have too many memes on ur phone **screaming* where are all my memes @ there's some pretty thiccccc fish in this photo *imma go hide...in a trash can *hey guys guess wut i hate ppl *hey guys guess wut i hate meself i lack a banana like, u eat the whole human my eyes smell like sugar cake now i'm crying *so, ya know, that's cool *pockeeeetttssss dr pepper says--STOP DOING THAT ITS NOT GOOD FOR UR HEALTH y not just ask for nickels...on the dime some things in this world r hot. and some r cold. and some r both. the moment u realize...strawberries r not bananas *u guys r mOcking science and it's very annoying. science is numbers. lots and lots of numbers. oh wait that's math. i ate air it was pretty nice there's nothing wrong with me *drops everything* ur dumber that a fourth grader-a THIRD GRADER *i am most likely going to hate myself forever if i do anything. *i'm pRoUd to bE aN iDiOt *i need to start using my eyes. *u mustn't be rude. *mOVE oh my gOd wuts going On hEre??! *that feeling when-when ur phones @-@ only-12%...heh heh. i identify as a lima bean and i deMAND MY OWN BATHROOM team drinking. is. bad. i'M LoOkiNG aT MemES LeAvE Me aLoNe *i feel like drinking 2 cans of f•ing red bull i'm seeking refuge. *well i'm not giving u any so get out. wut if u jumped out of a plane and ur parachute didn't work? uh- i'd be alive and u would be ded. hitler is a cowboy i'll take over this whole town. KILL ALL THE COWS. stop being ded. okay, trees pee *hey guess wut i pretend i'm better than everyone to boost my self esteem *i'm an ABsolute disAster u can see for MINUTES *im allergic to bear pollen. purple strawberries. strawberries that r purple. that's like saying hitler was chinese. americans in europe *gasps* my sprAy wAtEr U BROKE MY CANNED WATER *drops into chair dramatically* i'm better than ALL of u. don't stand on statues. that's gay. then how much is a sip?????¿ *screams into water bottle* where's mom i need batteries i'm telling mom My CoNtRoLeRs ArEnT wOrKiNg *stares at wells fargo* i think i was born there. *tHATS WELLS FARGO *laughs* *THATS A BANK i identify as a baked potato. **laughs hysterically* i dunno it just came into my head. i sWEar this guy just walked in here with a cart full of buc-ees ice. how do u like ur classes yeah *hand gel bubbles r sO cool My new motto is: if you can't be ridiculously amazing, just be ridiculous this is my school bus and i'm driving this people. my watch is a banana *looks @ empty wrist* it's half past freckle! i'm not a dufus i'm an Evan. U STOLE MY PENCIL SHARPENER sHUT UP there's so much spaghetti on the floor--SOMEBODY TOUCHED MY SPAGET *ayyyeee y'all know it's meeeE y'all need to fUCKIN MOVE i can't fuckin walk *ur a disgrace. no i'm an evan david ricardo feels sexy what r u a nerd 9? ooOh thAts gonna take a minute. yee honk a doodle doo! u frickin dweeb u nub Hello *extreme uncomfortableness* *i'm rlly bad @ swallowing justice. *look @ all those DiSrAcTiOnS *at least i wasn't weird and licked them or sm *idek where that came from i evaporated butter i can evaporate butter what's UR superpower i'm t posing ur sandwich ima god. how can u hate a decade. yo imma bout to get full out naked rn. *ANOTHER FIRE that's when it started--oh my jEEZ cLAP NOISES *skeety yeety *ooh i appeared here what is that. **sneezes* woO idk wUt that was but it felt goOd. *thats surprisingly smooth for a circle. wtf.