#or maybe I'll just be rbing stuff for a bit

[forgetful-river]

I love it when technology can sense you're having a tough time and then goes 'lets make it worse :-)'

[radellama]

Tagged by @sandushengshou thank youuuu!

~~

1. why did you choose your url?

It's an evolution of a suggestion @woogly-boogly made actually. We were probably 14~ish and I was saying I didn't really have any ideas for a name for my art account I was going to make, and he suggested adellama as a pun on my name and cause I like llamas. Made it radellama cause my nickname is Rads and it sounds cooler lolll

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

Yeas, I used to hoard a few urls for chrono related names but now I don't have any of them cause it got my account sniped for a time 😑

@chrono-the-babe - the chrono blog. It's bigger than my main lmao I love it. I've put effort into making it the best archive of fan shit for chrono that I can, I'm not always up to date with it but I have been going for years and I'm not stopping now

@radellama-art - my art archive, just a nicer place to look through all my art in one place cause sometimes I post on other blogs, but everything rbed to there is mine

@our-ends-will-shine-like-stars - made a blog for this au fic cause it's massive, and I have so much planning and art and stuff for it and don't wanna spam my ct blog too much, so here it goes!

@abe-and-orc - Abe and Orc. I'll post on there properly when I actually have more stuff to show and I start making the comic..... But they're my OCs, gotta nab the url here while I can haha

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

God idk. a little over a decade by this point probably

4. do you have a queue tag?

Used to but I don't really use the queue function anymore. I'm just rbing LMAO

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

I liked seeing the text posts on Pinterest, and when I got here it was so cool to see Loz fanart and stuff for the music I liked at the time!! It was fun making friends and sending each other fan mail on here lollll

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

THEY'RE MY GAY BOYS!! It's Magus (light blue hair, from chrono trigger) and Harland (dark blue hair, my OC I made specifically to be gay with him lmao) I like them!!!!!!

7. why did you choose your header?

It's a funny meme I redrew to be magland 😏😏

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

This one

9. how many mutuals do you have?

Don't count them, and there's no tracker lol

10. how many followers do you have?

149

11. how many people do you follow?

686

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

Yeah probably, idk

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

I usually check in once a day, maybe twice if I have time lol. Otherwise if I'm busy or something I just go on when waiting for public transport or during a lunch break type moment, or just wait until I go to bed and scroll for a bit. Sometimes I just take breaks and don't go on for most the day or skip a day or two just cause I'm not feeling it, or I'm too busy and don't really have the time. It's whatever

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

Yeah a few very brief responses but it's not a big deal lol, I try not to get wrapped up in that stuff too much. I'm pretty liberal with blocking if I'm not vibing

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts

Fuck off

16. do you like tag games?

Yeas

17. do you like ask games?

Yeas

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

Thog

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

No. The most would probably be infatuation cause they're cool

20. tags

@woogly-boogly @chemicalbrew @just-wublrful @lobotomy-maybe-bestie @controlvariable @future-dregs @fanimefreak @kanonavi @darksideofthemamon @aliciaevers and anyone else who would like to. No pressure as always!

[touhoutivations]

80% Reflowering

Hello everyone, giving an update that I'm hopefully going to be on track soon.

(Cw for ableism, abuse, suicidal thoughts, etc, maybe it's a bit too personal but if it helps someone?)

A lot has happened in the past month, ended up getting a kidney infection, realising (again......again again again......) that someone who was trying to "help" me was abusing me, and starting group dbt therapy.

For a while I felt like I had completely given up. Thinking about the future had given me complete static and paralysis. Whilst I wasn't actively thinking of ending things, I was tired and despite wanting to, my soul had just completely given up on trying, and I was just a husk that woke up and fell asleep because of biological processes. It messed with a lot of my relationships and I just. Couldn't care physically.

And now? Well, it seems gross and repulsive, I don't want to do it, but...there -is- a future for me. I really can't enjoy it, and it seems way too hard for my lazy self- but I'm being dragged, but I'm still here. It's begrudging, but it's something- which is infinitely more than I had previously.

I've been trying to do stuff I enjoy more, rhythm games and infodumping about stories- and it feels very...manufactured, I'm not sure if I'm enjoying these things or I'm getting "better" or adding more things on my plate, but...it does give me some things to keep going for at least. Allow yourself to sing silly little songs and make silly little doodles. I've been wasting time doing mediocre doodles, maybe I should post them? I haven't been doing the difficult things I actually need to do, but maybe that's okay- eating crackers is better than eating nothing.

I've been beating myself up for so long about how I "should" be, and how I feel and what I do, waiting for myself to become "normal". But it's not going to happen. I might become "okay" but ultimately, I've """wasted""" so much time these past 6 months waiting and shaming myself to get over things, and be normal because I shouldn't be taking this long. And maybe there's some truth in that last statement, but ultimately I was hurting myself and being my own worst enemy, running away from uncomfortable emotions into the arms of my abuser who tried to validate how I felt and then proceeded to use my struggles to out me to other people to isolate me so she could have me to herself and I would be programmed to how she wanted me.

I want more joy in my life. So I want to start this again. I love telling my thoughts and thinking about different characters from different angles and perspectives. I want to lower pressure on myself, but want to post maybe once every two days of varying quality- as opposed to big ol essays, and maybe rbing other things to keep it more active.

Thank you for your reassuring words, they do mean the world to me- I will bloom again, and I'll probably falter again- but that's okay.

[caramelmochacrow]

u can call me crow, i draw and write so u might see some posts abt my drawings and writings.

DNI if u just want to be an asshole or annoying. as long as ur chill we're chill. if i feel uncomfortable w u i might block u. sorry, no hard feelings. i just want to feel comfy here. i am a minor btw so keep that in mind when u interact w me.

if i say/do anything that is harmful to you or other people please tell me and explain to me what i did wrong i so wont repeat it, i want to learn from my mistakes.

i have a tendency to overreact and be super emotional abt stuff, especially when it comes to stuff i like, if u see me post in all caps, post a lot of mashed keyboard stuff, and maybe cursing a bit, that's just me being extremely emotional, sorry in advance.

i explain things really weird, so im sorry in advance, u can ask me to explain further to clear things up.

i might make vent posts from time to time, i wont be putting them in my talking tag and will add a cut before it so u may avoid it.

please dont repost my art, i'll allow you if you ask and tell me what you're going to do w it.

u can find me on ao3 as dat_toffee_crow, i got a ton of aa fics and im currently working on an au called Phoenix Wright: Ex Babysitter! (currently on hiatus tho, im not yet in the right mind to work on it yet ahaha....)

but! if u arent here for my aa stuff, i also write d4dj fics (and on the way to write bandori ones) and maybe a few king of fighter ones.

speaking of, my main interests at the moment are d4dj, bandori, and ace attorney. i also like a couple other stuff like revue starlight, revolutionary girl utena, major/major 2nd, haikyuu, blue period, kof, guilty gear, greek mythology, norse mythology, pokemon, and digimon. im also a fan of birds so u might see me rbing some posts abt them.

a couple of my comfort/favorite characters from my main interests are (comfort characters are bolded):

d4dj: all of rondo, all of merm4id, all of peaky p-key, sophia abyssmare, saki izumo, hayate tendo, kokoa shinomiya, noa fukushima, weronika abyssmare, and rei togetsu.

bandori: moca aoba, chu2 (chiyu tamade), all of hhw, all of roselia, tomoe udagawa, MASKING (masuki satou), LAYER (rei wakana), kasumi toyama, tae hanazono, hina hikawa.

ace attorney: ema skye, kay faraday, sebastian debeste, klavier gavin, apollo justice, trucy wright, and athena cykes.

[the-void-fiend-fan]

[They/it and any neopronouns for me] [I personally use it/its and they/them to refer to Void Fiend]

Hiiii I'm maybe the biggest Void Fiend ever. I am literally always open to discussion about them and will assume everything is good faith! This is my sideblog to compile Void Fiend stuff and scream about it at max volume because blorbo from my game is everything to me.

I also call Void Fiend "Viend" like a lot of the fandom, and especially if I'm tired or talking about my Viend-centric fanfiction Hollow Shell then I'll call it Vee! When I'm tired I'm more likely to forget I made that name up. Yknow how it is.

You'll see me rbing my main [ @irusanw4 ] a lot. That's just how it is. Also please please please @ me if you see a post even slightly related to Viend I am chomping at the bit for anything related to them at all

I'll also answer in-character asks if u guys want? It'd be Vee answering, just preface it with sth along the lines of "in-character ask" so I know what you intend! I might draw responses I dunno :P

[village-for-rambles]

Hey bestys I can't sleep I have stuff to do tomorrow and I finished an anime today that I have been rbing abouts soo I might as well give some context about what bofuri actually is huh.

The next season is coming out sometime this year and I highly encourage you guys to watch it if you're looking for something silly !! :] the full title is BOFURI: I Don't Want To Get Hurt So I'll Max Out My Defense. And it is long. And basically explains the entire concept of the anime <3

In short a girl (Kaede but she goes by maple in-game and that's the main focus of the whole thing) plays a vr game as requested by her friend (Risa but she goes by Sally in-game !! In the first few episodes she's grounded so she couldn't play with Kaede) and she has like never played a video game in her life so she's not familiar with mechanics . She is also very clumsy and a Nitwit (affectionate) so she decides to put literally all of her status points throughout the show into defense. So she is slow and weak but she's a tank for sure!!!! She's insanely overpowered because she finds a lot of special skills on accident by completely defying the game's normal logic (she eats a hydra and a demon and gains its powers <33)

However she has no idea how weird that actually is to other players and is confused and embarrassed when she zooms through the ranks in the first event she participates in as she's like level 6 by then but literally invincible <3 the admins nerf her abilities so it's not entirely impossible to beat her but with the power of Weird And Stupid And Encouraged (once again, affectionate) she earns even more skills that basically counter the admin efforts until they basically give up because she's attracting new players anyway and if everyone thinks it's fun then meh

It can get a little insane and maybe annoying how op she is but she's sweet to literally everyone even after going on a massacre rampage and her friends she makes in-game and their dynamics are wonderful :] there's no real danger and though the stakes can seem high from time to time a majority of it is just silly and fun. The voice acting is awesome and the character design is cute!! If you haven't noticed I particularly enjoy kanade because wtf. He fits my criteria!!!! Not my blorbo criteria but just. Like. Another one I have not named yet

I've rambled long enough about this but yeah if you're into video gamey animes (I'm not usually but I'll make an exception for this one) and you're lookin for something just a little bit ridiculous then I'd recommend bofuri :]] may or may not continue to ramble about this tomorrow

I am also finishing ANOTHER first season of an anime with my sister tomorrow so be prepared for a paragraph about that one too <3

[set-in-stardust]

heyyyyy guys so my health (mental and physical) has been kicking my ASS lately, so the chapter is probably gonna take forever, sorry!! i haven't even finished planning it out and I'm not gonna do anymore (unless i like, want to) until I feel better. we've had a rlly bad heat spell here for this week and ive missed so much school so I gotta catch up and I need to focus on that so I can end the year strong :)

chapter could take another month, who knows, but ty guys for sticking with me and just know that im taking a little break until I feel better and ready to go! ...which may not be for a while but I'll just be lurking on here for a bit instead, maybe writing the occasional one shot cuz I have a good idea, but mostly rbing stuff

[bunny-rambles]

sweet sweet buns!

i am glad i managed to at least bring a smile to your face, but i'm sorry you had to reply while your head hurt :( next time try to get a bit more rest :(( usually when i start getting a migraine while watching a screen i know it's time for tea and a couple hours of sleep

also! you're totally welcome to my teapot anytime and no matter what you say about it, i'd gladly see yours!! <3 problem is as you already stated there's so many cases of hacking that i'd rather not share my uid publicly ahah :: if i find a way to send it to you privately tho i'd gladly take you as a guest! :D

also the story behind the berry emoji is actually a bit different, but i'll save it for another time :) it's a funny one tho lmao

(also the ruby piece was really good! i never comment under your posts not to give my account away but i always like giving you a reminder that i am indeed reading all your works :))

((also, if it matters, i consider us to be close as well!! my friends now all know you as that good tumblr friend of mine but as i stared previously, it's always fun talking to you ahah :'))

with this i'll go finish prepping up the lunch even if i really cooked nothing and just have to plate stuff lol

buona giornata coniglietto, ti voglio bene! 💕

- 🍓

Well,

If you send your uid to me through ask then I don’t need to answer it, if you’re comfortable with that? Maybe not now but whenever you’d like to, and I’ll get to adding you when I can !! I’ll obviously give you a heads up before I do. As long as you promise not to share my uid, I won’t mind doing something like this :)

ah,,, thank you,,, it didn’t get nearly enough attention than the first one but I honestly don’t mind, the people rbing it seem to really enjoy it, and that matters more to me than numbers. Oh? What reminder? I’m going to have to keep my eye out and speculate hehe >:))

I’d love to hear the story behind your emoji, but I will wait patiently;;;

Of course it matters, that really made me smile, thank you dearest

I hope you have a wonderful day, ti voglio bene 💞

[touhoutivations]

80% Reflowering

Hello everyone, giving an update that I'm hopefully going to be on track soon.

(Cw for ableism, abuse, suicidal thoughts, etc, maybe it's a bit too personal but if it helps someone?)

A lot has happened in the past month, ended up getting a kidney infection, realising (again......again again again......) that someone who was trying to "help" me was abusing me, and starting group dbt therapy.

For a while I felt like I had completely given up. Thinking about the future had given me complete static and paralysis. Whilst I wasn't actively thinking of ending things, I was tired and despite wanting to, my soul had just completely given up on trying, and I was just a husk that woke up and fell asleep because of biological processes. It messed with a lot of my relationships and I just. Couldn't care physically.

And now? Well, it seems gross and repulsive, I don't want to do it, but...there -is- a future for me. I really can't enjoy it, and it seems way too hard for my lazy self- but I'm being dragged, but I'm still here. It's begrudging, but it's something- which is infinitely more than I had previously.

I've been trying to do stuff I enjoy more, rhythm games and infodumping about stories- and it feels very...manufactured, I'm not sure if I'm enjoying these things or I'm getting "better" or adding more things on my plate, but...it does give me some things to keep going for at least. Allow yourself to sing silly little songs and make silly little doodles. I've been wasting time doing mediocre doodles, maybe I should post them? I haven't been doing the difficult things I actually need to do, but maybe that's okay- eating crackers is better than eating nothing.

I've been beating myself up for so long about how I "should" be, and how I feel and what I do, waiting for myself to become "normal". But it's not going to happen. I might become "okay" but ultimately, I've """wasted""" so much time these past 6 months waiting and shaming myself to get over things, and be normal because I shouldn't be taking this long. And maybe there's some truth in that last statement, but ultimately I was hurting myself and being my own worst enemy, running away from uncomfortable emotions into the arms of my abuser who tried to validate how I felt and then proceeded to use my struggles to out me to other people to isolate me so she could have me to herself and I would be programmed to how she wanted me.

I want more joy in my life. So I want to start this again. I love telling my thoughts and thinking about different characters from different angles and perspectives. I want to lower pressure on myself, but want to post maybe once every two days of varying quality- as opposed to big ol essays, and maybe rbing other things to keep it more active.

Thank you for your reassuring words, they do mean the world to me- I will bloom again, and I'll probably falter again- but that's okay.