#part of me wants to see the myth following its end in s2

[ducavalentinos]

Oh my god! we’re getting a second season! 😍😍😍

[anxiousstark]

S2 07 | Restraint

BIG MASTERLIST | TW REWRITE

Stiles Stilinski x Reader! Half-sibling!Mccall

Word count: 

Warnings: Mentions of injuries, murder, swearing (always).

A/N: This is more likely a filler chapter. I swear as chapters go on they get better! I’m so excited for those ones to come out!

↪ PLEASE RESPECT MY WORK. DON’T COPY, TRANSLATE OR CLAIM THEM AS YOURS. NOT ON THIS WEBSITE OR ANOTHER. ALL RIGHTS ARE RESERVED.

"You will not go within 50 feet of Jackson Whittemore. You will not speak to him. You will not approach him. You will not assault or harass him physically or psychologically." Noah Stilisnki glanced at us with deception. It broke my heart to see him feeling so ashamed of us. If only he knew everything that was going on.

Jackson had told his father about us, and now Scott, Stiles, and I had a restraint order.

The Hazel-eyed boy gazed around. "What about school?"

"You can attend classes while attempting to maintain a 50 - foot distance."

"Bu-. Okay, what if we both have to use the bathroom at the same time and there's only two stalls available and they're only right next to each other?" Mr. Stilisnki, Melissa, and Jackson's dad sighed, crossing their arms over their chest. "I'll just hold it."

Stiles was bickering with his dad. "Move," Melissa pushed Scott and me slightly. She focused her gaze on her son. "It's not just this. Although, a restraining order is a new low that I didn't think that you would reach quite this soon. It's everything on top of it. The completely behaviour, the late nights coming home, having to beg Mr. Harris for you to make up that chemistry test that you missed." She now looked at me. "I truly didn't expect you to follow whatever these two had in mind while preparing such a stupid joke to Jackson." I felt a pang on my chest, biting my lower lip, deciding that it was better to remain silent.

"I missed a chemistry test?"

"Really, Scott? Really? I have to ground you. I am grounding you. You are grounded." Her eyes again on me. "That goes for you too, young lady. I have to ground you too." I nodded.

"What about work?"

"Fine.Other than work. And no TV."

"My TV's broken." And I didn't watch TV.

"Then no computer."

"I need the computer for school." True.

"Then no, uh, no Stiles."

"What?!" Stiles and I snapped at the same time.

"No Stiles?!" Said boy came closer to us.

"No Stiles!" She shouted, making me and the boy back up. Damn, Melissa was quite scary when she yelled. "And no more car privileges. Give me your keys. Give 'em to me!" Her hands shook a little as she tried to take the car key. "Oh, for the love of God."

"Mom, you want me to-"

"No."

"Mom, come on, let me just, mom. Mom!" He grabbed her trembling hands.

"What is going on with you? Is this about Allison?"

"Do you really wanna know?

"Yeah. Is this about your father?" Stiles nodded in the back, telling Scott to lie. I was too distracted by the mention of our sperm donor. "It is, isn't it? Okay, you know what, um-. We'll talk about this at home. I'm gonna go get the car." It made me think. Why did he leave Scott and Melissa?

"So did you guys get into much trouble?" Allison asked me, her right hand tightly clutching her bag. "Melissa seems like a woman who has a strong attitude."

"She does." I nodded. "She took Scott's car keys, TV, my radio, and no Stiles." I pouted. I opened the door of the library, motioning for her to go first. She grinned at me.

"Woah, no Stiles." She winked while I looked at her confused. "Must be hard for you."

"Uh? What do you mean?" She didn't answer, gazing at the camera that was installed on the top of the wall, walking directly to a determined place. I wanted to ask her again, but if the Argents knew that she was talking to me, hell would break. That is why when we entered the library, I walked away from her, finding Scott and Stiles.

I smiled at both boys, Allison separated from us by a big shelf. From one of the spaces between the books, she slid a tablet. "It's everything Lydia can translate. And trust me, she was very confused."

"Yeah, what'd you tell her?"

"That we were part of an online gaming community that battles mythical creatures." She replied, making Scott chuckle.

"I am part of an online gaming community that battles mythical creatures." He gazed at both of them, feeling insulted.

"I-I do too." Stiles's head turned towards me as he heard my confession.

"You do?" I nodded. "Want to come to my house and play together? We could complete all the missions, I'm already on the second part of the new event that finishes on-"

"No way!" I interrupted him. "It started one month ago! How did you get so far?"

Scott grinned, interrupting our passionate talk about our online community. "Okay, does it say how to find out who's controlling him?"

"Not really. But Stiles was right about the murderers."

"Yes!" His aggressive gesture celebrating that he was right almost hit me on the face.

"It calls the Kanima a weapon of vengeance. There's a story in there about this South American priest who uses the Kanima to execute murderers in his village."

"All right, see? So maybe it's not all that bad." I nodded along.

"Until the bond grew strong enough that it killed whoever he wanted it to."

I groaned, punching Stiles's arm playfully. "Why did you have to talk so soon?"

"All bad, all very, very bad."

"Here's the thing, though. The Kanima's actually supposed to be a werewolf. But it can't be-" Allison couldn't finish her sentence as the person in charge of the library got closer to her, trying to organize some books.

"Until it resolves that in its past which manifested it." Scott finished fo her. A chill ran through my body, I knew what was in my past.

"Okay, if that means that Jackson could use a few thousand hours of therapy, I could've told you that myself." If I was the same as Jackson, a Kanima. Would I be a werewolf after discovering what manifested this all?

"What if- It has something to do with his parents? His real parents." That could be me too. Jackson and I could have ended up being this monster for similar reasons.

"Yeah, does anybody actually know what happened to them?"

"Lydia might."

"What if she doesn't know anything?"

"Well, he doesn't have a restraining order against me, so- I'll talk to him myself." That wasn't a good idea. Jackson wouldn't be able to control his instincts if he was mad. And yeah, Allison was a pretty great hunter, but she could still get killed.

"Okay, what do I do?"

"You have a make-up exam, remember?" She grabbed his hand. "Promise me."

"Are they going to have sex right now? Here?" Stiles chuckled after my comment, grabbing my hand, taking me away from them to give privacy.

Scott was trying to past the chemistry test that he didn't attend, and I hoped that he would pass it. Stiles had spent the night before it helping him as much as possible, without Melissa knowing, of course. Remember, no Stiles.

Allison went to talk with Jackson and Stiles with Lydia. Allison didn't let me go with her, saying that she could protect herself, but I felt like something was going to be wrong. Stiles decided that Lydia would shy away if we went in a group to talk to her, so I was resting my back against the lockers while he followed the strawberry blonde girl.

I heard the ticking of a clock inside my head, I groaned. "Y/N?" Scott? Was I hearing Scott inside my head? "Allison needs me. Go get Stiles, he is in trouble. Keep an eye on him?"

"What about your exam?"

"They need me. She needs me, please."

"Go get Allison," I whispered aloud. I started walking fastly, trying to find Stiles. I did, and he was following Erica.

"You can't tell Derek, okay? There's a lot more to this that you don't know about. And just because you got the Alpha bite makeover doesn't give you a license to go around destroying people."

"Why not? That's all anybody ever used to do to me. I used to have the worst crush in the world on you. Yeah, you, Stiles. And you never once even noticed me. Exactly how you're not noticing me right now." Her hand rested on his chest, and I could feel hot all over. I didn't think twice, walking fastly to them, grabbing her wrist.

"I told you," I growled. "Don't touch-"

I was interrupted when the boy's locker room opened, Scott flying in the air, falling brutally into the ground, groaning. Jackson jumped on him, not being able to control himself. I ended up jumping on top of Jackson, trying to free Scott from him. But Whittemore punched me on the chin. Still, I continued fighting until Erica grabbed Jackson, and Stiles grasped me, lifting me from the floor. His arms were tight around my waist, mouth near my ear, letting me know that my eyes were ice blue. "Close them. Close your eyes. Breathe with me." He whispered.

We all ended up getting detention, Jackson had gone out of the room. He was pale and crazily sweating. When he came back, he still looked like he was going to pass out. Mr. Harris had left us on our own, letting us know that we needed to organize the library. I hated that dude.

Erica had let us know that Jackon's parents died in a car accident. Her father was the insurance investigator. Every time he sees Jackson drive his Porsche, he makes some comment about the huge settlement he'll be getting when he's 18. During all this, Stiles was sitting next to her, and she tried to lowkey flirt with him.

Ugh.

"It means he was born after his mom died by c-section. They had to pull him out of her dead body."

"So was it an accident or not?" Allison and I were staring at Jackson while organizing some books. The sooner we finished, the sooner we could get the hell out here.

"The word all over the report is inconclusive."

"Then his parents could have been murdered?" My parents weren't killed. My mom was a murderer, and my dad was an asshole who didn't have the heart to take care of any of his kids.

"If they were, then it falls in line with the kanima myth. You know? It seeks out and kills murderers."

"Then what about me?" I whispered.

"You aren't a kanima," Hazel-eyes peered deep into mine. "I told you before. We would have known that you were the Kanima like we knew that Jackson was." His hand rested on my back. "Don't worry about that. We will continue investigating."

After comforting me, Scott decided that we had to talk to Jackson. They continued talking, but I decided to ignore them. I felt dizzy, so I continued grabbing books, placing them where they belonged. My eyes went to read the title of the book 'Close your eyes, Y/N'. I blinked, a couple of times until those words disappeared, and the real title of the book appeared.

I grabbed another book, glancing at it. 'Obey or they die.'

"Stiles," I grabbed his arm, but he was trying to talk to Allison and Scott, deciding what to do with Jackson. "Stiles," He finally looked at me, a questioning look on his face. "W-What is the title of this book?"

He grabbed the books from my arms, still confused. "To kill a mockingbird." I nodded after his reply, smiling and placing the book where it belonged. I walked around, trying to find Jackson. But I found Matt, laying on the floor, blood dripping from the back of his neck.

"What the heck?" I heard Scott behind me when I turned around to look at him, glass shattered from above us, books falling. Scott threw his body on me, trying to shield me from the glass. "You okay?" I nodded my head, then he called for Erica. We heard her scream, and then, a thud.

We both quickly got up from the floor. We had to check on Erica, Allison, and Stiles. Stiles, was he okay?

Scott ran to Allison, and Stiles asking both of them if they were alright. I took a step to go to them but was stopped by Jackson. Half of his face was squamous, yellow eyes. He pushed me with incredible strength, my back hitting something, making me groan in pain.

Stiles clutched my hand, moving me to them. "Hey, hey. You okay?" His worried eyes examined every part of my face.

"Hurts like a bitch." I answered, grinning to lower his anxiety. Jackson was now acting odd, he was acting like the kanima. He was being controlled. He began writing on a blackboard "STAY OUT OF MY WAY OR I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU." Then he flew out of the library, smashing his body against a window.

We got into our feet, Stiles and I running towards Erica while the other two were too focused on the board. "Whoa, hey, hey, hey, hey! I think she's having a seizure." Stiles took Erica into his arms.

"He's alive." Allison checked Matt's pulse.

"Hey, we need to get her to a hospital."

"Derek - only to Derek." Even if her body was shaking, she just wanted to go to Hale.

"When we get her to the hospital-"

"To Derek. To Derek."

"Go." Allison looked deeply into my- Scott's eyes.

"I'm staying here with you."

"He can't take her alone. Not like this. And Matt - I've got to call an ambulance for him, just go."

"Guys," I interrupted. "Take Erica to Derek, now. I will stay here with Allison," I gazed at Scott, who was utterly anxious. "We will be alright." I felt other eyes on me when I turned my head I was met with Stiles's eyes. "Taker her to Derek, okay? Then, come back to me." He nodded.

.

.

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[alamanyar]

[this has been sitting in my drafts since saturday. it’s super long lol but writing this all down helped me process the clip] i have to say that i liked the last clip (let’s say as a whole) of ‘This is why I don’t like you.’ and by that i mean the approach and most of its execution. maybe a few rewatches helped, and maybe a bit of distance helped, too. 

the beginning sequence is badass. love the girls acting cool and goofy at the same time. great music choice once again. eva doesn’t mess around, does she. i do hope they will tone down her jealousy. i’m a bit concerned. the way she reacts is realistic and i get her, i do, i just hope she’ll grow soon, cause being jealous 24/7 is draining and i want her to be happy. the dancing sequence is fantastic. there are all adorable goofballs. (i hope luchì gets a line soon. know that i’m waiting). i hope we see more of this in the next weeks. those are only snippets, but they are great, because they show us friends having fun together. edoardo with his friends (the villa boys are slowly growing on me and we don’t see them often. thank you ludos). also for giving chico the screentime he deserves. the myth, the legend, the chaotic energy. i hope we get to see more of him together with edo. and if it’s a snippet of them dancing (?) together. edoardo is loyal to his friends, we all know that i think, but we actually see him having fun with them in a very soft way. you can feel they go way back. you only geek out with your best friends like that, don’t you? while he dances, he keeps glancing at eleonora who is enjoying herself with her friends. she has a lovely smile, i hope we see more of that as well. i feel like we’ve seen her more restrained this season. sure, we get a closer look on her since it is indeed her season. not everyone smiles 24/7 even if said persons is a literal sunshine. but i felt like she let go of the visible tension she’s been feeling on the dance floor for a while. i liked that part. when we see eva already drunk at the bar i already had a bad feeling. then come the two guys. i tensed. it was hard watching her talk to those absolute douche-bags. to those homophobes. they took advantage of her. and i was scared. then ele comes in and tries to get her away from the men, but it’s not working. eva is so caught up in her insecurities and her hurt over giovanni being with sofi that she seeks validation. ele is not giving it to her, and so she asks the men who had just spend a drink on her. she didn’t see nothing wrong in that in the moment. i can’t blame her, she was wasted. i hope she wouldn’t have the need to learn from this, but let’s be relastic, i hope she does. girls/women shouldn’t stop enjoying theirselves on a night out, and yet, they have to be attentive if they don’t want to be exploited. there’s always a possibility that people will do exactly that. and it sucks. it’s a sad and cruel world we [sometimes] live in. that being said, i appreciate how it was handled. even ele going to marti for help. a teenage girl asking her male classmate/friend whom she trusts to help her with dragging away their mutual female friend from men who are prying. it’s realistic, it’s real. it’s tough to watch. it’s not something that was shown in order to be realistic for the sake of realism. this is how it could go down. this is how it went down too many times for too many people. (one time is one time too much). this is how it will go down in the future. so what do the viewers take away from it? they relate. cause it happened to them. it happened to some of us. to a lot of us actually. they’ll talk about how real this scene was and how much it hurt. women, nor any gender, should get treated this way. will there be people who will be shocked with this scene because it felt too real? yes. it makes me sad, it truly does. if there are people who have watched this scene or similar scenes to this and weren’t aware that this is part of the realism we are living in, i hope this scene gave them something to think about. people who behave like the men in this particular scene probably didn’t watch this scene nor equal ones. but if people who think this scene was over the top or unrealistic, i hope they realise now that this scene wasn’t all of that and i hope they will change their view on what is okay to say/to do to a person who is clearly drunk. (look for the friends if they are not close, order a glass of water, make the person sit down). it’s a sensitive topic, but skam is about sensitive topics. this scene wasn’t a wake-up call for me. i know that this stuff happens every day. i, too, have been hit on. both during a night out and walking down a bloody street during broad daylight. i was even sexually assaulted during work when i was only a couple of years older than the characters we follow on screen. i’m glad they choose to tackle this topic. yk one second you’re dancing and having fun with your friends, the next you’re being hit on. it’s a puddle of emotions, yes, but we all know skam is like that. this was very intense, but i’m thinking it only raises awareness and it gets us (back to) talking about this sensitive topic, and hopfeully, to each other. that is what i took away from this scene. other than being scared for eva. moving on. eva shouldn’t have taken the drink, but it’s not her fault. it’s been a while since i’ve went out ending up completely wasted, but i’m not unpruned to react/behave like that even if i have a couple of more years on my sleeve. sometimes you do stuff you regret when you’re drunk. i don’t want to think about the times i was this level of drunk and nothing happened to me, because i was just lucky to be in a room full of normal decent humans. or it was because i just got lucky none of the assholes in this world tried something with me. it can happen to anyone, anytime. i’m happy ele had an eye on eva. this is also so very realistic. those friends who watch you when you’re going out together. you watch each other, sometimes one watches the others more closely and vice versa. those friends that walk you home/want you to text them when you’re home. when you’re safe. okay. ele goes to marti and marti’s face changes in a milisecond. bless his soul. bless his heart. bless martino rametta and everone who is like him. simple as that. he grabs eva and eva follows him instantly. their friendship, boy, i’m glad we get these snippets. but then the atmosphere intensifies. the story with eva beforehand was a good build-up, it really was. all my senses were heightened. marti drags eva away, he knows how serious this situation is. and yet he manages to stay calm. everyone who reacts like him shouldn’t be praised, because it’s decent human behaviour. and yet. alas. the men come on to him and the situations gets scary again or even more scary idk. he gets called a slur. he’s shoked, hurt, scared. all of it. but he won’t give in to these men’s provocations and starts to walk off. they don’t let him though. giovanni appears out of nowhere? no. he was standing beside him when ele came to martino. maybe he followed his action. he’s fierce in his protectiveness. giovanni is one of the kindest and warmest and softest characters in the skamit universe, but he won’t have you insulting his best friend. not on his watch. we’ve known that, yeah, but these seconds of him jumping between martino and the men are an amazing continuation of what we’ve seen in s1 and s2. as sad as it was watching him do that. he shouldn’t have to. but he did, and i am glad. i’m also glad elia came to the rescue. these boys. oh man. i am enjoying eleonora’s season. despite the change in releasing the clips, despite the dragging storyline concerning ele x edo x silvia. i am. and i’m excited to see where the rest of the season goes. i would give anything though to follow martino through his eyes for, well, idk, many many seasons. his season just captivated me. martino captivated me. marti x nico captivated me. fede captivated me. i’m sorry if this is annoying. this short scene with him though- for a second i was back in his head. i was back in season 2. damn. anyway, the way we react to things comes in different ways. this is where nico comes in. i think he didn’t hear what’s been said. i don’t think he acted ooc. maybe he was even asked to take sofi to the side. maybe the boys pushed him away, because they know how vulnerable he is. tends to be. he’s allowed to. and if it was his choice, i still wouldn’t call it ooc. we’ve seen him through marti’s eyes. we know he’s utterly vulnerable. it’s one of his biggest character traits. i think it would have been a bad call to make him jump into the fight, too. it’s not him. he’s like marti. he’d try to leave the situation. yes, the men were the ones who started it. all of it. with words, with aggression. they were ready to throw fists. i’d try to push them away, too, had they attacked my friends. where was nico? it’s all speculation, isn’t it? we see him and sofi for a split second in the background when gio rushes to marti’s side. we don’t know if he heard what it was all about. i’m thinking that the directors made a choice here. especially in the snippets of the aftermatch. why don’t we see his ‘concerned’ face? why is he “just” standing there (calmly even. maybe) with sofi and why doesn’t he rush to marti when the latter one is worrying over gio after edoardo and his friends throw the men out? (coglione. btw bless you, edoardo). it makes me think he didn’t know what was being said at all. i think he either didn’t know what the situation was about or maybe he thought it was about giovanni (and eva) after all. marti dragging away eva because ele wouldn’t ask gio for help in this particular situation, because he’s with sofi now. but then gio goes anyway, because someone tried to hurt eva and he still cares about her. maybe that’s what nico thought. it could be a possibility. another one could be that nico froze because of the fright. i really think there lies a reason behind him standing with sofi. and i think it will be resolved. they have been handling marti x nico with care (we’ve seen them in the bg and they are happily in love. we’ve seen it on the dance floor, too. happy boys happily in love). now, there wasn’t any concern in the snippet we see of him going to marti and the boys. there has to be a reason to it. it was all blurry anyhow and like 0.0001 seconds so what. there was concern at one point though, i’m absolutely certain. we didn’t see it though. and if it was because of him freezing at the situation, then so be it. who are we to judge other people’s reaction? those snippets of him in the bg don’t make me love his character any less. i know he loves marti and i know he’ll shower him with love more than ever and i know he’d never not care about marti. i’m not even mad at the decision to not show his reaction. he’s not the focus. marti has a bit more to it all. he’s a main and the whole harresment/homophobia scene happened with the three mains involved. i’m not mad (yet. lol), because i think there’s something following up to all of this and i’m positive we get the soft epilogues for marti x nico in the bg at one point. my shipper heart wants a lot of scenes with my faves. but this is also skam. a show that’s fast paced- you have to read between the lines sometimes. that being said, i thought this scene was difficult to handle, but i wouldn’t say it took away one thing from the other. eleonora x edoardo’s story is just beginning and like i said, i think we’ll get another look on the homophobia mention. i’m also thinking that this was maybe an intentional creative decision. one main/one ship gets a scare and one gets together. sometimes life is like that. very often so, i believe. people don’t have to like this of course. it didn’t upset me. eva being harrassed scared me. marti being cornered scared me. i could enjoy ele x edo, i just needed a few rewatches to let it really get to me. the conversation they have before she tells him she doesn’t like him was very well done. edoardo is so soft omg, giancarlo, calm down. i adore his approach on his character, i really do. i think he’s a great actor. i think, deep down, edoardo’s even one of the most vulnerable characters. there’s a sensitiveness to him. when his mother is mentioned, when he looks at eleonora and when you see how far he’s gone for her, but still wants her to be alright, even if he doesn’t play a part in her life. it’s acted out subtly but it’s also very visible, you know? he longs for eleonora to like him. he’s been trying really hard. i think for the most part he’s been respective towards her and i really like the growth we’ve seen so far in him. i’m excited to see where this will go. eleonora is scared of admitting her feelings. she doesn’t want to give in, but she also does. she’s seen another side of him by now and she struggles to keep up with idealistic views on men/human beings in general. she’s been soft for him in s1 and s2 already. when he calls her beautiful, she isn’t appalled, because it’s the way he says it. the way he conveys it. it has charmed her. when they talk on the balcony in illegale, she’s even more soft for him. little glances here and there. he challenges her. she likes it. and yh the whole silvia storyline doesn’t want her to go into to it and she tells herself that she can’t betray her friend like that and so on. but what do you do when someone you’re actually not keen on, gets to you in a good way? that’s eleonora struggle, her conflict. short intermission: i’m glad they didn’t make eva x silvia kiss each other’s faces off. if they don’t make one of them a lesbian/bisexual/, what’s the point? exactly. the kiss scene: i like that ele’s speech was cut short. it’s repetitive and edo doesn’t want to hear it. he’s hurt. obviously. it makes sm sense to me that he stops her. it’s been talked about how edoardo has been waiting for her for over a year. what about eleonora? i think she’s been falling for him for a while now, too. that’s why she runs and that’s why they don’t need any more words. it fits. i liked the thunder thingy touch. or whatever you call it heh. i thought it was done very well. maybe the rest is hella dramatic. not that the thunder thingy is not dramatic, you know, but some things are dramatic and some things are dramatic. anyway. i think the blurry take of the scene was a creative decision in the sense of that it was done in order to portray a metaphor which is that we aren’t able to see everything yet, because this is just the start of their relationship. we are looking at them through frosted glass. we don’t have all the details yet, and neither do they. the way it was shot certainly is growing on me. i like their happy faces. their smiles. they matched each other and it was wonderful to see. i like neck kisses so him kissing her jaw(-line) was *whistle noise* kisses in the rain are often cheesy. they are supposed to, i think. sometimes i like them, sometimes i don’t. i didn’t mind the rain in this one, it wasn’t as if it started raining on cue. scenes with rain involved also bear a metaphor and when it’s done right, it takes away the cheesiness of it all, or let’s say some of it, at least for me. rain usually means clearity, right? rain is essential to all living things. if it doesn’t rain, nothing will grow. and when it pours, it means it washes away your troubles, your negativity etc pp the rain in this scene probably wasn’t there just for the aesthetic (some say it took away the aesthetic. i think that’s something you can argue about), it was used, because it washes away eleonora and edoardo’s previous sins. if you want a dramatic appeal to it. it made them clean (again) and now they are standing naked in front of each other, because the rain got rid of their baggage, their dirt. ele had an epiphany on the dance floor that was long called for and she found clearity in the kiss under the rain. edoardo was defeated, he truly believed eleonora did not like him and after one long year of waiting, he gave up, because he can’t and he won’t pursue someone anymore who doesn’t want him. the rain washes away his sins, because eleonora accepts them now. she let down her guard and she sort of came down from her high horse. for edoardo it’s clearity because eleonora coming after him means that he didn’t imagine their connection and their banter. her clearity is his clearity. the rain implies that everything (for now) is settled between them. the coast is clear, so to speak. it means the start of their journey together. i admit that i didn’t care too much about their kiss that much at first, because i was still taken aback by eva and marti being harrassed and not seeing nico react to marti being hurt. and it’s not that we all have to like the same scenes or creative choices anyway. i don’t think the clip was bad because two massive things were happening. i don’t even think it was rushed. maybe that’s just me. with some clips you experience a rollercoaster of emotions. this one clearly was one of those. of course it’s absolutely okay not to like it or any other one. (or aspects of it). there’s still a lot to come this season and time for side storylines to develop. time for clarity and time for resolve. that being said, i know it would have been unrealistic for filippo to come to this party, but boy, did i miss him in that clip.

[northbndtrain]

Hey I'm a late Reven8e watcher and I love your Jack and real Amanda posts. Especially the season by season tracker of their development. I think the slow progression of their relationship and the trust they build over the course is something you don't see a lot on TV nowadays. You mind if I ask what do you think about the couple Amanda and Aidan? At the top of my head they don't seem like a bad couple but he always felt forced into the series to me. And it seemed their bond was never as deep

Hi! Thank you for the compliment, and I am so glad you enjoy the posts! I’m doing a re-watch right now and would like to eventually finally get the S3 and S4 “moments” lists done, too.

You’re absolutely right that the slow burn isn’t often done on TV anymore…hard to believe that up until the end of S4 Jack and Emily hadn’t done anything more than kiss a couple of times.

As frustrating as that sometimes was to watch in real time (and it was so, so frustrating, especially in Season 2, when they had very little interaction), in retrospect I can appreciate the fact that the writers took their time and made their case instead of rushing through the entire romance in the first season and then moving both on to new partners.

Plus, in the end, it worked out – I watched several shows around that time period that didn’t end with my favorite couple getting together, so to have Revenge really follow through with the promise they set up in the pilot four years earlier…that was a real gift.

Ah…Aiden…let me see…obviously, I’m not a fan, but that’s not just because I love Jack and Jack/Amanda. There were other problems with his character that I couldn’t get past.

(This is getting long, so under the cut it goes…)

1. AIDEN’S INTRODUCTION: You mention in your post that he felt forced into the series; that’s how it felt watching in real time, too. All during S1, there was never any mention of Aiden or even a reference made to Emily having had a serious love interest in the past, which makes sense because as far as we’re aware he was never part of creator Mike Kelley’s original vision for the show, but rather an addition that came after the show was renewed.

In a way, Aiden’s introduction was a symptom of the larger problem with S2 – that is, the writers/producers, high on the success of S1, decided over the hiatus to take their original concept, which was so beautiful in its simplicity (woman assumes a false identity to take down the people who betrayed her father), and twist it up into a bunch of unnecessary knots with the introduction of the Initiative, so that suddenly the villains weren’t just the Graysons and their employees, but also previously-unseen members of a larger global conspiracy involving all these other pointless baddies like Trask and Helen Crowley (how pointless? I had to look up both of their names because I couldn’t even remember them, even though they were all over Season 2).

The whole thing felt like sloppy miscalculation, and Aiden was right in the middle, as his tragic backstory involving his sister was tied into the whole Initiative conspiracy.

But what was also annoying was the way his relationship displaced Emily’s relationships with the other men in her life. The big story in S1 was the Jack/Emily/Daniel triangle, with Emily/Nolan’s friendship playing a prominent role as he was the only real partner she had in her revenge plots.

Enter Aiden, who took over Daniel’s place as Emily’s current lover, Jack’s place as her long-lost love interest from the past, and Nolan’s place as her partner-in-crime. It was just too much.

2. AIDEN’S LACK OF DEPTH/CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT: However, even though S2 became, in large part, The Aiden Show, he somehow remained underdeveloped as a character with no real life outside of what was going on in Emily’s life.

And I guess one could make the argument that, well, “it’s Emily’s show; of course she would have more development.” Except EVERY other contract character on the show, including all of the other men in Emily’s life – Jack, Daniel, and Nolan – had more of a life outside of her than Aiden did:

Jack: relationships with multiple on-screen family members, two love interests besides Emily (Fauxmanda and Margaux), a job running the Stowaway, a job as a cop, friendships with Nolan and Charlotte

Daniel: relationships with multiple on-screen family members, three love interests besides Emily (Ashley, Sara, and Margaux), a job at Grayson, a job at Margaux’s magazine

Nolan: multiple on-screen love interests, a career as a successful tech wizard, a hacking hobby, friendships with Jack, Declan, and Louise

As a result of their various storylines and relationships, the Jack, Daniel, and Nolan we saw in their final episodes are not the same exact men we met in the pilot – they’ve grown, been damaged, healed, and discovered things about themselves.

But all Aiden ever had was a little backstory (solely to explain how he came to meet Emily at Takeda’s), and a fling with Niko (in S3) that was so brief and pointless that I can’t even remember if it was just a flirtation or if they actually slept together. And I think in one episode we met his mom, maybe?

But that’s it. Everything else about the character was Emily-related – he was involved with the Graysons and Grayson Global because Emily was, he hated Jack because he was jealous of Jack/Emily, he hated Daniel because Daniel mistreated Emily, the only reason he interacted with Nolan was because Nolan was Emily’s BFF…. So, for someone like me who didn’t care for Aiden/Emily, there was even less reason to like his character since he almost didn’t exist outside of her anyway.

3. AIDEN’S CHARACTER FLAWS (OR, “AIDEN SUCKS”): But, you know, even all that above wouldn’t be enough to get me to hate Aiden. Find him annoying, sure. Roll my eyes at him, yes. Fast-forward his scenes, of course. Forget major details about his storyline, all the time.

In the end, it was his behavior and his treatment of the characters I did love that bothered me most of all. He lied to Emily whenever he felt it was in her best interest, and when he lectured or berated her it grated – Jack and Nolan lectured her, too, but the show often had them on a moral high ground that Aiden, as a violent student of revenge himself, could never claim. He also often made bad decisions only to shift the blame onto someone else.

But I found really difficult to get past was his treatment of Jack and Emily in S3 after he found out that Emily had told Jack her real identity. Everything that followed – Aiden lying to Conrad that Jack was the one who tried to kill him (Conrad), which put the lives of both Jack and baby Carl in danger; Aiden breaking into Jack’s home and manipulatively painting himself as the savior who only took the job as Corad’s hitman to give Jack time to leave town and stay away from Emily forever; Aiden having the unmitigated gall to get mad at Emily afterward; and then Aiden threatening Jack again a few episodes later – just had me thinking, “Yeah, Aiden’s the worst. THE WORST.”

And all because he couldn’t stand that Emily told Jack the truth that was her truth to tell to anyone she wanted to tell.

I mean, in a way, as a Jack/Emily fan, I appreciated it on a story level as evidence that Aiden was desperately insecure and jealous when it came to Jack and Emily’s relationship.

But it also just cemented my belief that there was never going to be anything root-worthy or sympathetic about him no matter how much the show tried to hold him up as one of the “good guys.”

4. EMILY/AIDEN’S SHALLOW RELATIONSHIP: You pointed out in your post that Emily and Aiden’s bond never seemed as deep. I agree with you completely. For years, one of the big criticisms of Jack/Emily was from those who said that Jack was in love with a little girl who no longer existed (a myth I debunked here), and those same fans often said in the same breath that Aiden loved the whole/real woman.

Then Barry Sloane (Aiden) came along and did a “Pop on the Pop” interview in S3 where, when asked if he wanted Aiden and Emily to end up together, he said, 

I love working with Emily. I love the chemistry we have onscreen. I love those two characters together. I think Aiden understands her and he’s in love with one part of the woman she is. He doesn’t know Amanda Clarke. He fell in love with Emily Thorne. If she was to show up as that other part of herself, I don’t know if he’d love that other half of Emily.

(Unfortunately, I can’t link to the interview because the link I saved now directs to Amazon for some reason, so everyone reading this is going to have to take me at my word that I wouldn’t make up a quote about a show that was cancelled two years ago.)

I remember being kind of stunned by that quote when I read it, but only because it was so blunt – the sentiment didn’t surprise me because his words were backed up by what we’d seen on screen: there can be no depth to a relationship if one of the people involved only loves one part of the other person and has no interest in the rest, and Aiden clearly had no interest in Amanda Clarke (perhaps thinking, his mind warped by Takeda’s training, that Amanda didn’t exist anymore, or that she was never “real” the way Emily was “real”).

Ultimately, the most layered of Emily’s romances wasn’t her relationship with Aiden, because it wasn’t enough that they simply had a shared background in and driving need for revenge.

It was her relationship with Jack that was the most layered, and that was, interestingly enough, in large part because they spent so much of the series apart, so much of the series denying themselves the opportunity to be together. That time and that push and pull allowed them the space to see and accept ALL of each other. That slow-burn struggle made their eventual union feel earned, real, in a way that Emily/Aiden never did.

Thank you for the ask, and I am sorry it took so long to finish it!

[latishiante1001]

Revenge (Part 1)  (Will post this in 4 parts 4/4)

Rating: Mature Category: No Ship (Yet) Fandom: Supernatural Relationship: No Ship (Yet) Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Bobby Singer, Original Female Characters, Original Male Characters Warnings: Adult Language Additional Tags: Hunting, A Form of Vampire Summary: Reader is hunting the vampire that killed her husband and runs into the boys. Of course Dean being Dean, he wants her. Word Count: 1885

PLEASE READ AUTHOR’S NOTES!! INCLUDES INFORMATION ABOUT READER’S BACKSTORY!!

A/N: Reader is a hunter that is hunting the vampire that killed her husband, Anthony. She finds all the information she can on all the creatures that she thought were myths at the beginning of her hunt. That was 2 years ago. Every time she gets close, the vampire and its pack disappears off the radar. ••• Takes place between the finale of S2 and first episode of S3 •••

Whole Thing here.

Revenge Masterlist here.

Arriving at the nest, you find out that it's an abandoned warehouse. The three of you get out of your cars and open your trunks, causing you to wince. Dean whistles at your collection of weapons while you look at his. When Sam clears his throat, you two are jerked out of your admiration of each other's weapons and start to get your machetes out. "Ready?" Dean asks. "Ready." You and Sam reply. The three of you walk to the door, weapons ready and adrenaline flowing. Dean pushes the door open slowly and Sam walks in. You follow him and Dean is right behind you. The three of you spread out, ready to take out however many vampires there are. You soon notice that all of the vampires are young, blonde girls. You all look at each other and when Dean nods his head, all of you cut off the head of the closest vampire next to you. Once those vampires are dead, the rest wake up and charge at you guys. You three start chopping vampire heads off left and right. Suddenly, there's a vampire that you didn't see coming and it grips your hand hard and throws you, causing you to cry out. Your cry attracts the attention of Sam and Dean. Dean looks over and sees you on the ground with a vampire coming towards you. "Y/N!" Dean yells, trying to make his way over to you. He soon gets over to you and raises his blade. "Messed with the wrong person." Dean says, chopping off the head of the vampire that threw you. You get up and put your machete into your left hand, even though your left arm isn't as strong as your right. You still try and kill the vampires but you are slower now. Out of the corner of your eye, you see someone that looks familiar move towards the stairs. You start to make your way over to the stairs. "Y/N! What are you doing?!" Dean asks, confused on why you are going towards the stairs. You don't hear him as you continue towards the stairs. You finally get to the stairs and you start up them. When you get up the stairs, you see a figure looking out the window. "Who are you?" You ask. He turns around and the ankh on his forehead looks like it was burned on. "I'm the alpha. The one that turned all these girls. The one," He smirks. "that turned your husband." "No. My husband is dead. You killed him." You say, trying to keep it together even though there are tears in your eyes. "No, you see. When I sucked all of his blood out and used his own blood to draw this," He points at the ankh on his forehead. "on his forehead, he became mine. He became, a vampire." You couldn't believe this. You wouldn't believe this. "No. You're lying!" You say, trying not to cry. "Oh, am I?" He says before motioning for someone to come in. Who comes in, what comes in, shocks you. A vampire that looks just like Anthony comes in, the ankh a scar on his forehead. "You got two options. One, you die. Two, and I think you'll like this one, I turn you into a vampire. You can be with your husband again." The Alpha says. Without noticing, tears start rolling down your face. What were you going to do? You won't be turned into a vampire but you don't want to die. You wipe the tears away and look up. The darkness in you comes out. I won't die. You start walking towards the Alpha. You think that if you kill the Alpha, the humans-turned-vampires' souls might return to normal and go to heaven. "What's your decision?" The Alpha asks, smirking. "Three, I kill you and every soul goes to heaven." You say darkly. "Basically option one. Get her." The Alpha says and your once human husband snarls at you. He charges at you and you use his body weight against him and throw him over your shoulder. Your move doesn't buy you a lot of time as he gets up and goes at you from behind. He takes you down and holds you down, using his weight advantage against you. You look him in the eye. "Anthony. Don't do this. This isn't you. This isn't you. I know you. This isn't your soul. I know your soul. Please. I love you. Please." You beg, the tears falling down your face again. You think that he's about to rip your throat out when he leans down to your ear. "I love you too. Go get him." He whispers and gets off of you. You jump up and throw your machete at the Alpha vampire's throat, cutting its head off, Sam and Dean coming up the stairs to see you do it. You watch his head fall, loving the shocked look on his face. You look behind you, towards Sam and Dean before looking at your husband on the ground. You rush towards him and hold him against your body. "No, please. I can't lose you again. Tony, don't leave me again." You sob. "You aren't losing me again. You're just seeing me one last time. I love you, Y/N." He says quietly. You sob, "I love you too, Tony." His body starts to glow a bright white and he starts to float towards the window. You stand up, wiping the tears off of your face. Dean comes up behind you and places his hand on your shoulder. You turn around and hold onto him. You try not to cry again as he holds you back. You pull back and wipe at your eyes. "Thanks you guys for helping me do this. I doubt I would have been able to do this alone." You say, taking deep breaths. "We were glad to help." Sam says softly. "If you need anything, give us a call." Dean says. "Likewise. Alright, let's clean up." You say, going to get your machete out of the wall. "I got a question. How in the hell did you throw your machete that hard to get stuck in the cement wall?!" Dean asks. "I was angry." You say, shrugging. You yank your shoulder out of the wall and wipe the blood off on the vampire. Dean's mouth hangs open for a minute before he goes downstairs to help Sam. ~~~~ The three of you end up at Bobby's to have a few drinks to celebrate. "Alright, I'm gonna have to stop with the drinks 'cause I'm gonna have to celebrate with my family when I get back to California. I gotta go get packed. Night guys." You say, getting up and going towards the stairs. You get up to the room and you get halfway done when there's a knock on your door. "Come in." You say, not looking. Dean walks in and sits down on the bed. "Hey." You say. "Hey. So, you going back to regular life?" Dean asks. You sigh, "I'm gonna stay in my house for a while. Probably going to figure stuff out and wing it like I've always done." There's silence as you finish packing. When you're finished, you sit down next to him. "Y/N, I know that it is not the right time for this but I don't know when I'll see you again, if I'll see you again." Dean says and you look at him. He puts his hand on your face and presses his lips against yours. You are stunned but you soon relax into the kiss and start to kiss him back. After a few more minutes of kissing, you pull back, breathing hard. "Wow. You're right about it not being the right time but I don't regret it. This may be the only time I have the chance to kiss the one and only Dean Winchester." You finish smiling. Dean chuckles, "Yeah and this may be the only time I have to kiss the one and only Y/F/N. When are you heading out?" "First thing tomorrow at 8." You reply. "I'll be here to say goodbye." Dean says, standing up. You stand up with him. "You better." You say, opening the door. "Goodnight Y/N." Dean says, kissing you one more time. "Goodnight Dean." You say, watching him leave. You put your suitcase on the floor in front of the bed and lay down. A few minutes of remembering the feeling of Dean's lips on yours, you fall asleep. ~~~~ You are heading down the stairs with Bobby in tow, carrying your bag despite your protests. When you get to the bottom of the stairs and look in the living room, Sam and Dean are standing there. "I'm gonna put your bags in your car. Keys?" Bobby says. "Thanks, Bobby." You tell him, throwing him the keys. He nods and walks out of the door. "Hey guys. Come to see me off?" You say, smiling, going over to them. "Of course." Sam answers, giving you a hug. You then give Dean a hug and move back. "Alright. There's something you're not telling me." You say, pointing a finger at them. "Well, we said that we would do it." Dean says, reaching behind him and grabbing a gift bag. "Here." You reach out and grab it, "I swear if this is what I think it is..." You take the red and blue tissue paper out and start laughing at what you see inside. Sam and Dean start chuckling as you laugh. "Oh my god. You didn't. I am so done." You laugh, pulling out the contents of the bag. "We told you that we would! You aren't a real hunter without one." Sam laughs. In your hand were two plaid shirts, one red and one blue. You laugh even harder. You calm yourself a little to where you are just chuckling. "Thanks you guys. This is amazing. I will make sure to wear these." You tell them. "You better." Dean chuckles, pointing a finger at you. "Just so you know, I am now going to get a lot of weird looks from my friends because of these shirts." "Just say, 'I'm a hunter' and walk away." Sam suggests. You laugh, "I'll make sure to do that." You put the shirts back in the bag and walk over to them. You give Sam another hug. "Don't be a stranger. Keep in touch." Sam says into your ear. "I will if you will." You say back, pulling away. You go over to Dean and hug him. "Remember our deal." Dean says quietly. You huff a laugh, "You too." You pull back and start walking towards the door. You walk out and go over to Bobby, giving him a hug. "You're always welcome and call if you need anything." Bobby tells you. "You too, Bobby." You say, pulling back. "Thanks for the help you guys." "No problem." Dean tells you. "Glad we could help." Sam adds. You smile and get into your car. You start it and roll your window down. "Take care of yourself, rookie." Bobby teases you, smiling a little. You chuckle, "You too." You rev your engine and start the long drive home.

Hey guys, I hope that you guys liked this! This fic can also be found on my AO3 (Latishiante1001) so go check that out as well. Part 2 will take a while to come out because I have to do a bunch of episodes of season 4 and it takes about 1-1.5 hours for one episode (depending on how many important scenes there are). It will also come later because school for me is starting back up so that will slow my writing down as well. Thanks for reading!

Tags are OPEN!!

[maevelin]

I loved your Kc meta on how Caroline is the last vampire left standing and although i pretty much agree to everything you made a comparison of Caroline's situation the the Salvatore's, the OG's and Katherine's but it's really not the same. Caroline will lose her home and everyone she ever loved. Everyone. And this will happen gradually. But for the others the had the knowledge that their family was still alive. and as for katherine she had already lost her family before she was a vamp.

To which meta are you referring to because I have occasionally written many from one liners to gifs to dissertations lol

I am assuming you are referring to this one: (x)

And this part in particular?

Caroline Forbes ending up the only vampire in a show that is meant to be based on the vampire genre is an honor and a homage to everything this show once stood for. Every vampire of the show faced the same destiny you describe here. Damon, Stefan, Katherine, the Originals. And yet when their stories began and they were introduced to the audience everyone took in their story expecting to feel their age and get to know their ageless journey throughout the centuries. No one complained about their predicament. Everyone wanted to get more into it.

If so then I think you lost my point at the start a little. The point I was trying to make at the first part of my meta was how TVD was a vampire show that was not meant to revolve around human lives and be constricted to human morality and conventions and the idea of how a human life evolves through time. We as fans were meant to see through the darkness and the eternity and enjoy characters that were eternal creatures of the night that happened to suck blood and live throughout time. Yes every story can give messages and have parallelism between art and reality but in the end every fictional story is different. Every story uses different dynamics. TVD was based on vampire mythology with everything that came along with it. With the monster that lurks beneath the skin and eats people for lunch. With the promise of forever also. It was a show that was never meant to be about dreams of white fences and grandchildren and defanged vampires in its essence. It was meant to be a story based on the vampire lore with vampires that shared the same destiny of immortality and vampirism and so when Caroline became one she shared in the same sense the same nature and hardships every other vampire introduced in the show did. The good and the bad. The beautiful and the ugly including the prospect of forever with everything that came along with it. Not everyone would experience it the same way but it was a common theme of the species. And when the show began NO ONE complained about the vampires being...vampires. No one nagged about their predicament. Every tragic aspect of their nature along with every great one was highlighted and became a great story to be told. The weird mentality that vampires need to be humanized and should follow the ordinary lives of humans despite their nature became a thing in the minds of the fans when TVD stopped being a vampire sci-fi show and became a Dawson creek soap opera.

This was why Caroline as a character became a fan favorite to begin with. Because her best storyline that boosted her popularity was her transition to being a vampire in S2. Because she loved being a vampire. Because she excelled at being a vampire. Because she shined when she became a vampire character. Imagine that really... Fans that chose to watch a VAMPIRE show got to love the VAMPIRE characters and were intrigued by them. The most popular fan favorite characters with the biggest traction in the TVD universe had been vampires and were loved only as such. People got to rage about them in particular with violent obsession because they were serving the vampire genre and this was why people had originally tuned in with TVD. Damon Salvatore, Katherine Piece, Stefan Salvatore, Caroline Forbes, Klaus Mikaelson, Elijah Mikaelson, Rebekah Mikaelson, Kol Mikaelson. All awesome vampires that were great at being vampires in one way or another either as dark characters or tragic ones or something in the between.

So in a show like TVD that centers around the diaries of a VAMPIRE (from title, to theme, to genre, to presentation, to the basis and core of the show) having one character ending up the last vampire standing is a homage to the glory days of the show. To the very core of the show. To what the show should have been and what it once was. And that was Caroline. The one vampire that loved being a vampire. The one vampire that did not want the cure. The one vampire that persevered and relished at being ageless and strong and was better off with fangs and bloodshot eyes. And if the show’s quality had not deteriorated to the point where people were seeing a human-esque soap in the end no one would see the conclusion of Caroline’s story as something other than great.

Now as for the rest. For Katherine’s case for example, as you mention it in your ask, what does it matter if you lose your family before or after you turn? The end result is the same. The feelings are the same. The prospect of immortality under those circumstances is the same. In the TVD universe thousands of vampires exist. Not all of them have families. And for those that do it is not always unicorns and roses and they can get into very dark codependency paths. Sometimes family can break you and be abusive and promise you only misery and living with that burden for centuries and forever can be very tragic also. Having a family should not be glamorized by default. Sometimes you make your own family with friends and chosen ones. Sometimes you walk alone. Sometimes you do everything in different times.

Because in the end of it all every story is unique. Every person is unique. And family is not always blood. And feelings do not have a beginning and an end. You do not know what tragedy or what miracle each day will bring.

And let me turn this into a bigger rant because I get so mad when people create certain expectations and boxes for life. When people in this case pity Caroline because they have in their minds that life is a bleak place when certain things do not happen or when others do.

Yes life can be tough but no one can predict what will happen tomorrow. I have not watched TVD ever since season 4 but from the blogs I follow I am under the impression that Caroline fell in love with Stefan when he was still a vampire. Him becoming human and dying was not part of the plan. Neither Stefan or Caroline could have predicted their tomorrow. And that atrocious pregnancy of hers was also something unpredictable too in the narrative.

And this is life. Some may choose to see TVD as the end of Caroline’s story. Some like me choose to see it as her origins story. Just the beginning.

Even if Caroline was human how old would see be? 20? 24? So what would she do if she would lose everyone in her life at that age? Wouldn’t see move on? Wouldn’t see live? One day at a time. One tear. One smile. And you know that happens in real life too.

The same goes with Caroline’s life now. For every loss she will have a gain. Vampirism comes along as a blessing and a curse and this is why stories that include this myth are so popular. Vampirism gives eternal life and youth in Caroline’s case and beauty and powers and demands blood and even loneliness and greatness and wretchedness and dark and light. Time flows and cultures and societies rise and fall. An epic journey made for legends.

That is Caroline’s path. Some people chose to survive it, some others quit; and Caroline Forbes was not presented as a quitter. She was a survivor and no one can take that away from her. And pitying her like that is as if all her journey in TVD went unnoticed. Caroline Forbes can outlast and outlive torture and horror and terror and will do it with a smile. She is not weak. And she will get to live lifetimes with every lesson and hope and aspiration she has. You can try to put certain characters into archetypes but some are beyond them. Some can rise. Some don’t just survive. Some thrive while doing so.

And life does not end with heartbreak and it most certainly does not become a burden because of it or futile. I do not understand where this absurd notion is coming from. Life does not begin and end with a relationship that went wrong or with the death of a loved one or with pain and calamities. Or even with you ending up alone. You mourn. You grieve. You get up. You move on. You rebuild. You get to choose what makes you and what breaks you.

Caroline Forbes was presented as a strong optimistic character. She survived abuse and horrors and deaths. Where other fell she stood tall. She did not conform to what others expected from her. When someone told her that she could not do something she proved them wrong and she did it without losing her bubbly energetic personality. Her strength and her survival instincts have really deep roots. Either she has a family waiting for her or even when her own family planned to kill her (Liz in S2) or tortured her (Bill in S3) ...and even then she survived the pain and she was willing to live and retain her heart and she did it while she kept loving being a vampire (with or without family). This was never something Caroline negotiated. She kept fighting. And that is a great story to be told. And the fact that she remained the last vampire standing while everyone cried and broke was not a mistake or an accident.

And who can tell what her tomorrow will bring? Even when you get at your lowest there is always hope. Life is beautiful and a mystery. How more people Caroline will love? What kind of family she will be able to make in the future is she wishes it so? Just one? How many people she will meet? How many will touch her heart? What will she lose? What will she gain? Who will she become? What inventions will she see in their making? How many sunsets and stars will inspire her? How will she shape her life? What ties will she make with people and places? How many will break and which ones will remain unbreakable? What epic journey will come ahead?

We do not know. She does not know. And that is the beauty of it. Life is a journey. With its ups and downs and turns and twists. An unpredictable journey. Either it is for a few decades or more in such stories. And I honestly do not understand why people lament the unknown future in Caroline’s case when in reality it is just one more great story waiting to be told.

[chickeninthewoods]

2004 films

| The Bachelor | Tuesday, Dec. 28, 2004 (late-nite) | Pulled from the pile of purchased DVDs at the folks'... to great disappointment. This is a bad, bad film, and Chris O'Donnell truly sucks. Phoned-it-in sucks. This explains why he hasn't worked much in the last 5 years - which was a bit of a mystery up until now. Avoid this like the plague.

| Spanglish | Dec. 27, 2004 (afternoon) |

| Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban | Sunday, Dec. 26, 2004 (late-nite) | Dark and long. The kids are growing up, and the films are, as well. I think my mom is borrowing this from my sister. She has all three, unfortunately mostly in fullscreen.

| Snow Falling on Cedars | Sunday, Dec. 26, 2004 (late-nite) | Fantastic and incredibly sad. This was pulled from the stack of purchased DVDs at my parents' house over xmas vacation (who knows why they buy what they buy).

| Rivers and Tides | Saturday, Dec. 25, 2004 (afternoon, w/ the 'rents) | A gorgeous, nearly-meditative study of the work of Andrew Goldsworthy, who creates sculptural installations in and from nature.

| Seabiscuit | Saturday, Dec. 25, 2004 (w/ the 'rents) | Oddly-paced, but exciting. A book moved to the screen doesn't always work well, though, for the reasons well-illustrated here. The historical snippets might have worked well as chapter introductions, but they make for a confusing set of transitions on screen.

| De-Lovely | Friday, Dec. 24, 2004 (evening) | A mess of a film, though pretty and entertaining. But maybe that was intentional. Porter's life was a mess, albeit an entertaining one.

| Before Sunset | Wednesday, Dec. 22, 2004 (late-nite) | I had planned to watch this on the plane to Indy, but after watching the original last night, I couldn't help popping this one in today before my trip. I'm frustrated as hell by it, and the sudden ending, but I guess that's the reality part.

| Before Sunrise | Tuesday, Dec. 21, 2004 (late-nite) | Luminous, like Julie Delpy's skin.

| 24: Season 3 | Week of Dec. 17, 2004 | My current policy is to review television series all at once, rather than a disc at a time, but I wanted to begin by noting that this season does not start out well. The tech is particularly bad, and I don't really care about what happens next.

| The Door in the Floor | Saturday, Dec. 18, 2004 | A little less dark than I thought it might be, and more tangible. I haven't read any Roth, ever, and now I'm prompted to start. I'll have to rent it again to watch the commentary and featurettes -- I'm fascinated by writer/screenwriter collaborations, and the adaptation process (so long as the writers can also talk).

| The King of Comedy | Wednesday, Dec. 15, 2004 | I think it's not possible to watch a film on the recommendation of someone who says its their favorite. I just don't have much to say about it.

| Jersey Girl | Tuesday, Dec. 14, 2004 (afternoon) | Ooh, this was cute! 13 Going on 30 cute, 3 Men and a Baby cute. The kid was great, and the Sweeney Todd bit was cute even in its un-cute-ness. A definite recommendation for parents and families who want to see a decent movie.

| A Home at the End of the World | Thursday, Dec. 9, 2004 | I'll admit, I rented this for the much-anticipated kiss between Colin Farrell and Dallas Roberts. It wouldn't have been worth waiting for, if that's all there was to this film. But all the things I disliked about marginally similar films, I liked about this. Where Forrest Gump was nearly campy, this was understated and honest. Where the Myth of Fingerprints was sarcastic, this was lacking all irony. At the same time, where Big Eden was celebratory and fantastical, this was pretty raw. So I don't know exactly how I feel, but I'm glad I saw it.

| Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind | Saturday, Dec. 4, 2004 (afternoon) | Reviews were generally positive, but I had received a recommendation against watching it just a few days prior. I enjoyed it, and would certainly keep it out of the "never again" bin, though it probably won't end up on a best list. As other reviewers noted, its the emotional core that saves this film from a bad sort of quirky, and I did appreciate that. But I felt it didn't go far enough exploring the morality of doing such a bizarre and radical thing. I would have preferred a "what if" movie with a love/life story running through it, to a love/life story with lots of other stuff piled around it. Jim Carrey didn't annoy me, though, and that's a rarity. Kate Winslet is yummy.

| Capturing the Friedmans | Nov. 27, 2004 (afternoon) | Truly one of the most amazing films, ever. While working on a short film about children's pary clowns in NYC, the filmmaker happened upon an extraordinary story of a family caught in an avalanche of molestation charges and media frenzy in the mid-1980s. The film includes footage shot by family members during the time of the arrests and court proceedings, as well as present-day interviews with police and other persons involved. If netflixing, be sure to get Disc 2 as well, as there are hours of additional footage and follow-up interviews with the filmmakers.

| Maze | Nov. 1, 2004 (afternoon) | This scared me off initially, fearing it was a Rob Morrow vanity piece, but then I forged ahead on faith in Laura Linney. And I wasn't disappointed -- the film is quite lovely, surprisingly nuanced, and I forgive Rob Morrow his salary whining in the 90s (Janine Turner, however, is getting her just desserts in dry-eye commercials)

| Ghost World | October 25, 2004 | I held off on seeing this when it was playing at York Sq., but it was fun on dvd. Scarlett and Thora bring so much to the table.

| The Apprentice, Season 1 (all discs) | Oct. 20, 2004 | Addicted to S2, thought S1 might be good. Soapy fun.

| Seeing Other People | Oct. 20, 2004 | Julianne Nicholson is always great, but the movie wasn't my favorite. Vulgar and ultimately a little boring.

| Dopamine | Sunday, Oct. 10, 2004 | I like Sabrina Lloyd, and the story here was interesting, but I didn't ever really latch on to anything in this picture. There was so much unexpected darkness, maybe that pushed me away. | Normal | Friday, Oct. 1, 2004 | I was so skeptical... but this was handled with about as much grace and dignity as I could ever have imagined.

| Uptown Girls | Sunday, Sept. 19, 2004 | Decent fluffy entertainment.

| Dinner for Five: Season 1, Disc 1 | Sunday, Sept. 12, 2004 | Never as interesting as it promised.

| High Art | Saturday, Sept. 11, 2004 | Not as hot on the most recent viewing, but I'm sensing the ambition element more clearly each time I see it.

| Alias, Season 2 (all discs) | Week of Sept. 6, 2004 |

| Tuck Everlasting | Sunday, Sept. 5, 2004 |

Alexis is a wonder, and I'm so glad she has a spot on the WB for a while.

| Charlotte Sometimes | Sometime in September, 2004? |

| 13 Going on 30 | Wednesday, Aug. 11, 2004 | I watched this on the plane, BDL>>DTW, and finished in the wrap place in terminal B. Cute, cute, cute entertaining fluff.

| Mona Lisa Smile | Monday, Aug. 9, 2004 | I don't know why I haven't returned this yet; it was good, though not in the Wonder Boys-kind of way I had hoped. Not much new to say, though it was interesting to watch how the juxtaposition of super-smart-capable and wanna-be-housewifey played out

| Watching You | Friday, July 30, 2004 | This was a set of short films, all lesbian-themed in some way. I got it because I was looking for a short called "travelling companion," which had been on another set of shorts on VHS a few years ago. The quality of gay-themed cinema has come so far in the last few years, though. My favorite ("10 rules") was actually in the "extras" section, though I wasn't sure exactly why there was that division. The title short, "Watching You," was set in Israel (??), though that never was mentioned explicitly.

| The Cucumber Incident | Monday, July 27, 2004 | This was an indie (so indie it's not even in IMDB yet) documentary, viewed on the Sundance Channel's DOCday. It tells the story of a group of three women in a family who basically raped and beat the husband of one of the women, who had been molesting his daughters. It's complicated and awful -- the wife who let her husband back in the house after he'd been to prison for molesting her older daughter, the child protection system which didn't intervene after subsequent charges (and let him back in the house after his imprisonment), the complicated revenge / scare tactics they exacted, and the overwhelming weight of the justice system that fell on them as a result. Everything about this is awful, and though I never felt like we really got to the heart of the women's fury as they prepared to terrorize this guy, that may be as much a result of midwestern stoicism as it is a comment on the film's ability to draw out their story.

| A Mighty Wind | Saturday, July 24, 2004 | I've watched this more than once now - I don't know why, but it's silly and entertaining and even ok musically.

| Travelling Companion | Tuesday, July 20, 2004 | I watched this on an interminable train ride from New Haven to Boston, when the train literally broke down in the middle of rural Rhode Island. Nice.

| Casa de los Babys | Monday, July 12, 2004 | I may need to give this another look before I comment too much. I rented this while my sister was visiting, and I'm not sure we finished it.

| Along Came Polly | Sunday, July 11, 2004 | B+

| Girl With a Pearl Earring | Sunday, July 4, 2004 | Watched this at T's up in New Hampshire -- it was a lovely portrait, and a really creative and daring way to make a film about a painting.

| Dead Like Me (entire first season) | July, 2004 | So bummed I don't get Showtime anymore... rent the dvds if you get the chance, it's almost as good as Six Feet Under (the first year of SFU)SHO

| Things You Can Tell Just by Looking At Her | Wednesday, June 30, 2004 | I watched this in the car, driving from my parents' house in Michigan down to visit my sister in Indianapolis. It's not a bad car-movie (if such a category exists), except that I did get a tad claustrophobic at one intense point. I really thought I had seen this before, but I had only vague moments of deja vu as I watched it. The women were just amazing -- Glenn Close, Callista Flockhart, Amy Brenneman, Cameron Diaz (and more) -- but I was particularly amazed by Callista Flockhart. I don't think it's reasonable to question her talent after watching her work in this film -- something so far from Ally McBeal, so different and difficult. The movie is a set of one-acts, each focusing on a different character. The supporting characters in each act are extremely sparse, though there's a bit of connection woven throughout the film, between the characters. It's important to understand that they're living in the same time, the same world. Glenn Close is an Ob/Gyn with real emotional maturity and intimacy issues; Cameron Diaz is a relatively well-adjusted blind girl whose sister (Amy Brenneman) is taking a backseat; Holly Hunter is a successful, albeit lonely bank officer who reels at the pointed analysis of a homeless woman who buns her cigarettes; and Callista Flockhart is a woman tending to her dying lover (Valeria Golino). There's also a piece with Kathy Baker who infantilizes her new short-statured neighbor, but I found it really odd and jarring compared with the rest.

| Raising Victor Vargas | Tuesday, June 29, 2004 | Watched on the plane from Detroit to Hartford -- though I think I'll want to see it again when I can hear and concentrate better. This would make a great double-feature with "Real Women Have Curves", for the sheer heart of both

| The Banger Sisters | Sunday, June 27, 2004 | Watched mostly on the plane between Hartford and Detroit, and finished up at my parents' house in Michigan -- this was a fun little showcase for a variety of veteran and newcomer talent. Goldie Hawn's butt really is amazing, Susan Sarandon proves she can give up scenery-chewing for Lent, and Eva and Erika somehow manage to look like sisters (though moreso if their parents were Susan and Goldie...)

| Nobody's Baby | Monday, June 14, 2004 | Caught this one on Showtime, found by the Tivo's Radha Mitchell wishlist. I'm not sure what Radha's doing playing these desert waitresses (e.g., When Strangers Appear), but this one wasn't bad. A little anachronistic, maybe, but not awful.SHO

| All the Real Girls | Saturday, June 12, 2004 | Though I really like some of the actors, I just didn't find this movie that compelling. It was slow, and maybe would have been better if I had seen it on the right kind of day (e.g., long, slow, cold and weathery).

| Trembling Before G-d | Saturday, June 12, 2004 |

| Purity | Saturday, June 12, 2004 | I watched this nearly in a double-feature with Trembling Before G-d, and it was so stunning. Clearly bitter and biased, but stunning.

| Saved | Friday, June 11, 2004 | Saw this Heathers-in-a-Christian-High-School in the theatre, opening weekend. Not terribly crowded, which was surprising. The movie was just delightful; funny and interesting and terribly attentive to the details, which was important. It's fun to see someone like Mandy Moore play a character this deliciously saccharine, too. Go see.Orange

| Marathon | Thursday, June 10, 2004 | Caught on the Sundance channel -- and couldn't tear myself away. It's a faux-documentary of a girl who does an annual 24-hour crossword puzzle marathon in NYC -- mostly on noisy subways and buses. The dialogue is minimal, the plot is pretty much nonexistent, and yet its riveting to watch, for some reason. It's one of the few times watching a film where I felt like I was in that zone of a conversation where I was truly getting to know someone.

| Out of Season | Sunday, June 6, 2004 | A surprisingly ok new grrl movie, which is unusual. And since I wasn't expecting anything at all, I was a very thrilled little camper. This definitely goes on the recommendations list, maybe even above 'Go Fish' (though after 'Get Real').| Soldier's Girl | Friday, June 4, 2004 | A really wrenching look at the story of a particular casualty of 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell" (pre-"Don't Pursue," I think). I don't know how close to the truth this story was, but I'm not sure it matters. It was beautiful.

| The Company | Wednesday, June 3, 2004 | I've been dying to see this ever since it came out, but I was a bit disappointed. While the dancing was just out of this world, I had trouble adjusting to all the jumps between performance and slice-of-life/rehearsals and story. I think that was intentional, but it just didn't work for me. I love the Joffrey, though, and it was worth the time spent just to watch them dance. Neve included. While I'm usually the first to scrunch up my nose at something that appears to be a vanity piece, this is most certainly not one of those times. No one hires Altman to do a vanity piece, for starters. For an Altman-esque look inside the ballet, this is what you want. But I still prefer Center Stage for the energy of the dance world (as soapy as it can be).

| xx/xy | Tuesday, June 1, 2004 | I wasn't sure what to make of this -- it sounded too much like that other film with Kathleen Robertson in a menage a trois -- but with Mark Ruffalo, I wanted to give it a shot. It was interesting for the blurriness and for the look at a particular kind of person's behavior in a relationship, but I didn't love it.