#pinootgu

[pinootgu]

i have a lot of incoherent game of thrones thoughts but most center around the importance of mad kings in the story.

we start begin the story with the death of a mad king, hearing about his reign of terror as opposed to seeing it. targaryen madness is mainly characterized as a product of their incestuous line, a burden/curse of their limited "blood" so thus their line is inbred to hell and gives them all sorts of issues.

however, what i find interesting are mad kings constructed outside of this targaryen line. in a way, stannis is his own mad king. he is a cultish, religious zealot that views his reign of terror as a means to an end. a normally nonreligious man, stannis' belief is gained through proof--no matter misidentified or attributed. to me, this characterizes his illness through the perspective of the mad. there is a perception of a disconnect from reality and psychosis as something without reason and cannot be explained---madness is disorder and disfunction made human. however, in the perspective of the mad, the experience of psychosis or disconnect from "rationality" is with personal logic. you believe what you believe for a reason. it doesn't need to be truthful or right or rational but you see this irrationality as rational. others see it as illogical but it is because they do not see your perspective; they are often times right but that is something you won't be able to reckon with in ur delusional state bc that's the whole thing. while the other mad kings are characterized as mad without reason, the perspective of stannis' story forces us to at least empathize and understand the steps he is making. we are holding his hand as he falls into "madness." of the 5 kings, stannis is thus the "mad king" of the lot.

we are left hanging with his madness. is it targaryen madness, his blood claim to the throne not visually apparent (he doesnt look targ) but characterized through his actions and beliefs ? is it simply that the concept of kings is madness ? all that power but also the burden of responsibility too much to consciously be given ?

or is it more simple ? more personal ? more individual ?

maybe it was a natural disposition---an outlier that kept diverging. the less favored middle child, in the dark shadow of his brothers. pressured too young and put in a terrible situation he bore no responsibility for getting into, simply was bound by familial ties. starved to the point of near cannibalism and then cast aside. barely second fiddle, more a forgotten double bass---keeping the rhythm but unsung and barely noticed. unhappy in his lot but also doomed by it. unliked to such a degree, maybe at times justifiably, bc of how he is. he pulls every short stick given.

"stannis is pure iron, black and hard and strong, yes, but brittle, the way iron gets. he'll break before he bends."

this observation sits with me. is this breaking something we witness throughout his arc ? he chips and cracks as things happen, as things go wrong. will he break when he has gone too far; unreachable in a deep-end; unforgeable and unrepairable? is it triggered by killing renly, does that drive him mad ? is it killing shireen that is the last straw ? or instead did he break before the events of the main story---best understood as mentally unwell from the beginning ? we are seeing him broken under the pressure of everything; even shards can be weapons and breaking isnt the end, he doesn't have to end by breaking, he can instead become something different.

maybe his actions simply symptoms but not the cause; these deaths just make his decline worse but the ball is already in motion.

tl;dr: something something modern aus stannis' character NEEDS to cut off davos' fingers to be stannis in the same way he NEEDS to kill (or try to kill) renly to truly be himself as well.

[f103sy]

Hi! I really love your art and I was wondering if it would be at all OK to get your Jean as volition art as a tattoo? I am willing to compensate you for your art. I just really have been obsessed with this piece of fanart and think it would be a dope tattoo.

I'm not good at English, so please use a translator to read it.↓

あなた(pinootgu)が自分自身にタトゥーを掘るだけなら、今回はjeanの絵を使っても大丈夫です。

ただし、TwitterかTumblrで自慢したいので、タトゥーを掘ったら写真をぜひ私に送ってください！

[zapooperfilm]

HEHE LOOK AT WHAT I MADE FOR THE GORILLA INTERRUPTED ZINE U SHOULD GO CHECK IT OUT IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY

[avntgardener]

hi friends i was tagged by @pinootgu love u bestie mwah <3

five songs you’ve been listening to on repeat recently:

cambia, cambia - los dug’s dugs

maybe your baby - stevie wonder

melting of the sun - st. vincent

mind reader - silverchair

uh huh- jade bird

last movie: minari, w/ my best friend. steven yuen and yeri han i am kissing you directly on the lips.

currently watching: survivor with my mama. if she went on it she would totally win sole survivor btw and then i would get to meet jeff probst and hopefully find out if he was grown in a lab

currently reading: the only good indians. modern classic. talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular. but fr genuinely one of my favorite books of all time. written by horror legend and all-around spectacular human being Stephen Graham Jones. if you can handle body horror u must must must read this

i tag uhhhhh @maraczeks @dykeryofficial @tauruz @dvkethomas @visionsmalewife

[downsteepy]

Rules: answer the questions and tag 9 people you want to get to know better/catch up with!

tagged by @pinootgu tysm 🥺

Five songs you’ve been listening to on repeat recently:

meet me at our spot - the anxiety

powder blue / cascine park - yumi zouma

akuma no jigoku nabe - zhao tianyou

judgement shinpan - nishikiyama akira

face fisted - dethklok

Last Movie: rewatched john carpenter’s the thing 😳 genuinely one of my favorite movies imaginable. also macreadys hot

Currently Watching: im watching dr pimple popper but its mainly just like a background noise thing. been real bad with actually properly Watching things for a while

Currently reading: i’ve been currently reading The Book of Yokai by michael dylan foster since like november. its good i just cannot focus enough to read </3

umm ok.. @raytaku @itsthegrimreaper @poisonbarbs @drix @valen-dreth @woaterbottle and anyone else that wants to do this 🥺

[wolftattoo]

Rules: answer the questions and tag 9 people you want to get to know better/catch up with!

tagged by @pinootgu tysm <33

Five songs you’ve been listening to on repeat recently:

desire by everything everything

ruler of everything by tally hall

fine by lemon demon

broken halo by phantoms ft nicholas braun

um uhh i dont really have a 5th just listen to people like us performed by john goodman in the movie true stories

Last Movie: i watched animal room 1995(?) last night and i think my letterboxd review sums it up perfectly:

matthew lilliard gets home to his winston-churchill-looking father (butler?) and strips down then goes upstairs to his room. matthew lilliard makes one of his goons to shit into a toilet then forces neil patrick harris' face into it. matthew lilliard kills a bald guy with a head tattoo and then it almost comically cuts to said bald guy's balding father holding a framed photo of him, drinking and crying. neil patrick harris does acid and screams at his (badly acted) alcoholic mother. i could keep listing things that happen in this movie and you'd just have to believe me.

Currently Watching: going thru youtube vids atm. just finished watching rlms review of the justice league snyder cut

Currently reading: lol lol lol i dont read

i tag uhh @surskip @digdug @beetlehands @devilhigh @bashirs @glamoid and any other mutuals that want to do it xx

[afishcalledwanda1988]

sola @mordredmanor tagged to to shuffle my playlist and share the first 10 songs!!!

1. homemade dynamite - lorde

2. night - the altogether

3. don't let's start - they might be giants

4. lent - autoheart

5. absentee - jack campbell

6. curses - the crane wives

7. let's get this over with - they might be giants

8. perfect places - lorde

9. dirty imbecile- the happy fits

10. dying alone - american pets

i tag uhhhh @mrtheinsatiable @pinootgu @avntgardener and you! whoever is reading this !!

[pinootgu]

the second zine i ever made is now on itch: HYSTERIA this zine was made in november 2022 after a period of obsession and delusion over ken russell's 1988 horror comedy lair of the white worm. what began as a nightly ritual screening became a dive down "hysteria" wikipedia, leading to a rant posted accidentally to public instead of close friends and now this zine. this zine is a piece of propaganda for this over-the-top and not-very-good movie. deeply influenced by my experience as a transmasc lesbian, I came into this movie for lesbianism but found that fulfilled in a different way than most. It interrogates constructions of the monstrous feminine, masculinity, and hysteria by using peter capaldi's character angus as the lens for my lesbian thrills. it is accompanied by a playlist i made in the heat of delusion:

a print version + digital format pdf are free but tips r appreciated

[pinootgu]

in the process of uploading my physical zines to itch.io. go check out my first upload: suburban cur. this zine was made and first printed in early may 2023 and is a rant about multiraciality, positionality and an introspection of how my identity as a mixed race person is a postcolonial construction. prompted by a class discussion gone awry, this zine gives no answers on issues of race. it is simply a ramble on experience and isolation. the phrase 'suburban cur' was one that i thought up in 2021 to describe my identity, paying homage to anti-miscegenationist slurs that are often times animalian in their dehumanization. a "cur" is a dog that is a mix of different breeds, typically synonymous with "mutt," but with more violent connotations. a print version + digital format pdf are free but tips r appreciated <333

[pinootgu]

very proud of my stannis playlist i will not lie. i see visions. i need to smoke w him. i need to milk his prostate. i need to introduce him to microsoft excel. he's my babygirl

[pinootgu]

PINOOTGU BIRTHDAY REAL

[pinootgu]

ok i posted this on twitter too but making self indulgent gay benrey art fuels my soul

[pinootgu]

i need to find a new hyperfixation bc i just keep drawing benrey and it is getting me nowhere

[pinootgu]

ok wig i never post art on here but uhhh 😳😳 i have been working on this benrey gay yearning comic for a hot minute and i want to share it !! the lyrics come from the song “just what i needed” by the cars

[pinootgu]

RHFHFHFHFHFF I LOVE DRAWING ALL FUCKED UP LOOKIN LIKE CURDLED MILK IT IS FUN

[pinootgu]

would,,,, would you like some wayne in these trying times