#playing in college................. first person to do that we will kiss probably

[luvbug724]

while i am here i stayed up til 8am rereading icebreaker by a. l. graziadei yesterday for the first time since it came out & ive been offline because theres no fandom for it but i cant stop thinking abt mickey so ive been devouring any mindless book i can get my hands on. if u want a cute little YA romance abt sports & mental health it is probably up ur alley :) you :) read it :)

[amentomensmut]

first time for everything pt2

Drug Dealer! Mike Schmidt x fem!reader wc: 5k

this is part 2 to my fic first time for everything! read the first part here.

Summary: After an unforgettable hookup with your friend Sara’s drug dealer, Mike Schmidt, you go to a college party to try and put a stop to your constant stream of thoughts about it, and more specifically, him. However, when you wind up bumping into the man you had been thinking about non-stop at the party, you can’t help but give in to the one person who started it all. 

Warnings: 18+ content, so much banter. Like, so much. Mike is a smug bastard, alcohol consumption, swearing, kissing, dirty talk, use of pet names, fingering, cunnilingus, finger sucking, unprotected sex 

Note: we are so back. also i really hope you guys like this omg. (p.s. sorry that this part has no cannabis use in it. I know that’s like kinda the whole point, but with the story i wanted to tell i couldn’t find a place to put it and i didn’t just want to shove it in randomly so i sorta just left it out.)

Like smoke filling up your lungs, Mike Schmidt has infiltrated your mind in every way possible. 

Thoughts of him invading every corner and crevice of your brain, making them impossible to shake. To say the least, ever since you had the pleasure of meeting him, your mind has been rather occupied. 

His lips on yours, the smoke from his mouth permeating your own, his hands on your body, your skin on his skin—it's all too much, you think. In fact, if you could go back and erase the entire interaction, you would. It’s the only thing you’ve been able to think about, and it’s all Mike Schmidt’s fault. 

You wonder if he thinks about you too. You know it’s probably unlikely, but you can’t help but feel like he might. Like he also dreams about it. Like he also yearns for you again. Maybe he gets off thinking about it, like you do. You shake those thoughts away, however, when you come to the conclusion that it probably wasn’t as special to him as it was to you. 

"Okay, Y/n, what the fuck?” Sara's voice cuts through your thoughts, startling you.

You whip your head around to see Sara standing behind you. Her arms are crossed against her chest, and her face is painted with a worried expression. 

“What?” you respond, confusion evident in your voice.

“You’ve been staring at that wall for 20 minutes.” Sara says it with an accusatory tone, like she caught you doing something you shouldn’t be. 

“I’m just thinking.” You shrug, trying to play it cool. I mean, you’re not lying. You were trying to do your homework, and then you started…daydreaming. Thinking. Whatever you want to call it. 

“Yeah, I know. Thinking is all you’ve been doing this week. What’s going on?” Sara sighs, and you can see the genuine concern in her face. She sits on your bed next to your desk, trying to meet your eyes. You have a hard time lying to her, and catching her gaze will only make you more vulnerable, so instead, you choose to stare down at your homework. 

“This isn’t like you. You’re the most studious person I know, and you can’t even focus enough to finish a couple questions. Tell me what’s going on.” She continues. You weigh your options. You could tell her you fucked her drug dealer. She couldn’t be that mad, right? Or, you could keep it a secret, but continuing to lie to her is the last thing you want to do. You let out a deep breath and just decide to bite the bullet.

“Okay, um, remember when I went to your drug dealer's house last week?” You wearily start. Sara nods her head, signalling for you to continue.

“Well, one thing led to another, and we kinda, sorta had…sex?” The room is silent after your confession, the weight of your words hanging in the air. When you look over at Sara, you expect to see disappointment or anger on her face, but instead, she's looking at you with one of the biggest smiles you've ever seen.

“I knew it!” Sara exclaims, jumping up in a rush of excitement. 

“I knew there was a reason that you were practically glowing when you got back from his house!” You groan at her loudness, putting your hands over your face to hide your embarrassment. You should’ve known she wouldn’t have been upset with you; she practically shoves you at any man who gives you some sort of attention in the hopes that you’ll break your introverted habits. “Wait,” she excitedly adds. “Does this mean you can get me a discount?”

“No, Sara, I can’t fucking get you a discount. I haven’t seen him since it happened.” You say, and you try your best to mask the disappointment in your tone. I mean, what did you expect? That he’d come running to you the next day, get down on one knee, and propose? You knew it would most likely be a one time thing, so why were you so upset about it?

“So that’s why you’ve been so out of it this week. Plagued by the thoughts of a good fuck. Trust me, I've been there. ” Sara sighs dramatically, shaking her head like she knows this feeling all too well. 

“I don’t know... as cheesy as it sounds, I sort of can’t stop thinking about him? It was so good, and now it’s all I think about.” You admit, and Sara takes her place back on the end of your bed. She takes one of your hands in hers, and she nods her head in an understanding manner.

“You know what you need?” She says, and you shake your head, "No.".

“To get your head out of your chemistry books and go to a goddam party! No wonder you’ve been thinking about him; all you’ve been doing is thinking.” She says, motioning to the copious amounts of school-related papers on your desk. 

“Trust me, Y/n. The best sort of remedy for this kind of thing is to just let loose and forget about all your shit for a little while, you know?” As much as you’ve tried to avoid parties and distractions during your college experience, you can’t imagine there’d be much harm in going to one party. Besides, if you can get your mind off of Mike for a few hours and just have some fun, it’ll be worth it. 

“Alright. Yeah, I think you’re right.” You say, and Sara jumps up excitedly as she begins to talk about one of her good friends that is throwing a party that night, and that it’ll be the perfect excuse to get away from all stress of exams. You nod along, a smile plastered on your face as you try to match Saras excitement. You’re not quite sure if this “remedy” will work or not; however, you’d just about try anything at this point. And like Sara always says, you’re a hermit, so this will be a good way to break you out of your shell. I mean, the last time Sara told you to do something, it ended up going better than expected, so what’s the worst that could happen?

----------------------------------

“Sara, I feel like I’m going to flash someone.” You say as you pull on the hem of your very mini skirt. The walk to the party wasn’t long, but your bare legs are cold and you’re itching to get warm. You’ve never really worn something as revealing as this, but Sara insisted you wear something from her wardrobe. 

“Your skirt isn’t that short; don’t be dramatic.” Sara teases as she leads you towards a house that's booming with both music and people. You would be lying if you said you weren’t nervous. You haven’t been to a party during your time at college, and to be honest, you weren’t ever planning to. Focusing on getting your degree without any distractions was always your goal. An unrealistic goal? Maybe, but it had been working well for you up until a week ago. However, things don’t always go as planned, and now you’re stepping into a house full of sweaty, inebriated bodies and music so loud it makes the entire house shake. The air is thick and humid, and you’d get lost in the house’s dim lighting if it weren’t for Sara’s hand in yours guiding you through the sea of bodies. Your shoes stick to the floor as you walk through the house, and you know alcohol drunkenly spilled from overflowing, cheap solo cups is the culprit. Sara drags you to the kitchen, where all the alcohol is stashed. 

“We should do a shot! To commemorate the first party of your college career!” Sara yells over the music, already pouring each of you a shot of tequila. You give a little laugh at Sara’s enthusiasm, and you nod your head in agreement. As you wait for Sara to hand you your drink, you notice just how many people there are. You watch through the kitchen window as someone throws up on the lawn. You wince a little at the sight and at the thought of how much alcohol they probably drank. You briefly wonder if going to this party was even a good idea, but you try to shake away any negative thoughts. 

“Babe, you’re thinking too much again.” Sara says, waving her hand in front of your face as she passes you the shot. 

“Sorry!” You half-yell, but Sara dismisses your apology with a wave of her hand.

“Don’t be sorry, just have fun!” Sara replies as she effortlessly downs her shot. You also attempt down your tequila; however, it’s not as effortless, and you grimace at the sharp taste of the tequila on your tongue. It takes everything in you to swallow it without gagging, and you wish you had something to chase it with. 

“Fuck, that’s awful.” You groan as you pull a face. You don’t typically drink alcohol, and when you do, tequila is certainly not your first choice. Sara laughs and places a hand on your shoulder. 

“That’s what makes it good!”

The next hour or so goes by pretty smoothly. You’ve essentially been following Sara around like a lost puppy, accompanying her as she greets her friends, which feels like just about everyone at this party. You watch as Sara effortlessly navigates the room, her laughter ringing out above the chatter and deafening music. As you stand alongside Sara, watching as she converses with a group of people you recognise as being on the school's soccer team, you feel a wave of insecurity wash over you, like an invisible barrier separating you from everyone else. You feel out of place at this party, and in a way you are. You haven’t been to a party in your three years at school, and now you've realised that you barely know anyone around here. You haven’t seen one familiar face, other than Sara, in the past hour and a half since you arrived here. You begin to wonder how different your college experience would be if you just got over your fear of people and parties, and went out like Sara had. You try to dismiss your destructive thoughts, but it’s no use. You feel like somehow everyone knows that you’re not really supposed to be here, and it makes your throat feel dry with anxiety.

“Hey, Sara, I’m going to get something to drink. Do you want anything?” You loudly whisper in her ear, trying not to interrupt the conversation she was currently in. You’re anxiously wanting to get away from the crowd, and your body language shamelessly shows it as you bounce your leg and bite the skin off your lips.  

“No, I’m okay,” Sara says, and you watch as her eyes survey your body, her eyebrows knitting together. “Do you need me to come with you?” She bends down to speak in your ear, although her words are slightly slurred, and you softly giggle at the way her alcohol intake has affected her speech.

“No, I’ll be okay.” You assure her as you walk away from the group, giving Sara a little wave as you make your way to the kitchen. 

You had intended on getting a drink, but when you got to the kitchen and saw the door to the backyard, your desire to escape the muggy, stale air landed you on the back patio instead. Your lungs thank you for the fresh air as soon as you step outside, and the cool winter breeze feels refreshing on your sweaty skin. There’s still plenty of partygoers outside, but it’s certainly not as packed as it was inside. You watch as people play beer pong on a ping pong table on the lawn, and the sight only solidifies your fear of missing out. The sound of hearty laughter and the smell of weed only make you want to go home more, and you sigh as you push off the patio railing to leave. You turn around to make your way back inside when you see him.

At first, you thought it was your eyes playing tricks on you. Like you had been thinking about him so much that an apparition of him was here to taunt you. Like your thoughts of him for the past week had now turned you delusional. However, his eyes lock with yours, and now you so badly want it to be a hallucination, or your mind playing tricks on you. Dread washes over you and you wish you had never come to this party. You want the ground to swallow you whole when you see him beginning to walk towards you, and for a split second, you consider running away. 

You mean for your words to come out nicely; you truly do. However, they don’t come out that way, and instead you say this:

“What the fuck are you doing here?” If your words shock or hurt Mike, he doesn’t show it as he now stands in front of you with that goddamn smirk on his face.

“I have a business to run, Y/n. But you’d know a thing or two about that, wouldn’t you?” You’re not sure if you want to kiss or slap him, but you roll your eyes anyway at his smug tone. He gives an unbothered laugh at your attitude and actually, you’d definitely rather slap him right now.

“Your business is selling weed to intoxicated college students?” You retort with a scoff, crossing your arms against your chest like it’s a defence mechanism. You hate that his presence is making you jittery, but you hold your ground, your eyes never veering away from his.

“Funnily enough, they’re my top customers.” Mike smugly says, and you don’t even try to hide the scowl on your face. You squint your eyes at him, trying to read his intentions. He smells like weed and spicy cologne, and it immediately brings you back to his house, and more specifically, his living room. There's a pregnant pause between the two of you, and before you can work up the courage to say something, he speaks again. 

“Cute outfit, by the way. Have you dropped the innocent act yet?” He asks, obviously satisfied with his words. He's clearly trying to get under your skin, and you won't let him.  

“I don't know what you’re talking about.” You fib, shrugging your shoulders like the question is irrelevant. If he's going to try to tease you about your hookup, you won't feed into it. 

“You know, after that night, I don’t think you can really call yourself a good girl. You’d be lying to everyone. You're lying to me right now.” 

“Fuck you, Mike.”

“You should come by my house tomorrow. You're probably all out of the weed I sold to you last time you were around, right?” He says nonchalantly, changing the subject. You furrow your eyebrows at the change of conversation, and your stubbornness to let Mike have any satisfaction during this conversation doesn’t falter.

“I don't smoke weed.” You quip.

“Lie all you’d like, Y/n. It doesn’t change the truth.” He says, brushing a stray hair out of your face before walking back into the house without giving you another look.

----------------------------------

Usually people use the phrase “walk of shame” when you’re walking home from a hookup, however, that phrase pretty much sums up how you feel as you walk up Mike Schmidt's driveway.

You’re not sure how you’ve ended up back on Mike Schmidtd’s doorstep again. Maybe it was the satisfying sting of weed going down your throat and into your lungs, or the insatiable hunger for the man who supplied it to you. Either way, the front door is being opened and the man who you’ve been thinking about non stop for the past week is behind it. 

“Had a feeling you’d be back.” He says with a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, and you’re high before any weed has even entered your system. 

“Don’t cream your pants.” You mutter as you push past him and walk inside. You would be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t know why you were here, you both knew. After Mike left you at the party, you knew you were completely and utterly fucked. That any other attempts of trying to forget him would be worthless. That like a bee to a flower, you’d be back here, in Mike’s house, searching for the one thing you had been denying yourself for the past week. 

“So I was right then, you’re all out of weed.” He says as he closes the front door. You take your jacket and scarf off, hanging them on the coat hanger at the door. You face Mike, who's currently leaning against the front door, watching you. 

“Can I have a soda?” You ask, and Mike cracks a smile at the familiarity of the situation. 

“I would’ve offered, but I wasn’t sure how long you’d be here.” He says, trying to bite back his smile. You follow him to the kitchen, watching as he grabs two cans of soda. Your fingers brush as he hands you the cold can, and you look up at him as he clears his throat.

“So…an eighth again?” He inquires, looking at you over his can of soda as he takes a sip.

“Mike, I’m not here for your goddamn weed.” You laugh. Mike laughs as well, and the exuberant sound is like music to your ears. 

“So you came for my soda instead?” Mike teases, and you shake your head with a smile.

“I think you know why I’m here.” You say, and your cheeks heat up at the thought of what happened last time you were in his house. Your fingers tighten around the soda can at the thought of touching Mike again, and you so badly want to reach out for him.

“I’m not sure if you deserve it. You weren’t very nice to me last night at the party.” He smirks, crossing his arms against his chest and leaning against the kitchen counter. He places his soda can on the kitchen counter and tilts his head at you, waiting for your rebuttal. 

“I was nice enough.” You simper, shrugging your shoulders. If he’s going to make you work for it, you’ll play along. 

“Say please. I can’t believe I have to teach you how to use your manners.” He coos, and you huff when you realise you won’t get what you want right away.

“I'm very polite.” You stubbornly stand your ground, but you can feel your resolve weakening with every word that comes out of Mike's mouth.

“You might be polite, but apparently you forgot how to ask for things.”

“Please, Mike.”

His lips are on yours as soon as the words leave your mouth. All the build up from the past week, all the sexual tension between you and Mike is released into the kiss. The kiss is frantic and needy, like even being this close isn’t enough. His want for you shows in the way his rough hands grab any part of your body they can reach. You blindly slide your soda can on the kitchen counter before threading your fingers through his hair, softly pulling at the root making him moan into your mouth. He tastes like cream soda and weed and his hands caressing your body send a shiver up your spine, and you haven’t felt this way since the last time he touched you. 

“You have no idea how much I've been thinking about you.” He says in a gruff voice as he walks you backwards and lifts you up onto the kitchen counter. You spread your legs so he can slot himself between them, and he presses soft kisses into your neck. His hands are on your waist, stabilising you as he kneads the soft skin there. 

“I thought you might’ve forgotten about me.” You shyly admit, and he softly bites your neck, almost scolding you for your words. 

“Are you serious?” He asks incredulously, removing his head from your neck to look at you. His heavy lidded gaze makes you feel nervous, and his reaction makes you feel like you said something you shouldn’t have. Your silence serves as an answer to his question and he shakes his head at you disapprovingly as he slowly gets on his knees in front of you, never breaking eye contact. You suck in a quick breath at the sight of Mike in between your legs, and an involuntary whine escapes from your lips when he begins to undo the button of your pants. 

“Y/n, the only thing i’ve been able to think about is you.” He groans, and you lift your hips off the counter to help Mike as he pulls your pants down over your ass. Your pants hit the floor and Mike is pressing open mouthed kisses into the insides of your plush thighs. He takes his time, kissing and sucking on the expanse of your thighs, and you think you might go crazy if he continues to tease you. Your thighs slightly close around Mike’s head, looking for any friction you can get. Mike lets out a laugh and you throw your head back in frustration.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Is there something you’d like?” Mike innocently asks, looking up at you as his mouth gets dangerously close to your pantie clad pussy. A sadistic smile paints his face and you put your hands in Mike's hair, trying to pull him closer to the place you need him the most.

“Mike, stop fucking teasing.” You pant, and a dissatisfied sigh leaves Mike's lips.

“I thought we talked about using your manners.” He mocks, and although he's the one on his knees in front of you, that doesn’t change the fact that he’s certainly still in control. 

“Please, Mike. Please, I need you.” You beg, and not long after, Mike is licking a hot stripe up your covered cunt. You bite your bottom lip, your chest heaving as Mike continues to press messy, open mouthed kisses to the wet spot on your panties. His grip on your thighs is strong, and the feeling of his blunt nails digging into the soft skin makes your head spin. Soon enough, his thick fingers are hooking into your underwear and pulling it down your legs. He wastes no time, quickly latching his lips to your swollen clit and making out with your pussy like a man starved. Your jaw drops in pleasure, and your hand tugging at his hair makes him moan into you. 

“Mike, h-holy shit.” You cry out, as he enters one of his long fingers into you. His tongue swirls around your clit as he pumps his finger in and out of you, and the sounds of him eating your pussy are absolutely sinful. Mike replaces his tongue with his thumb, rubbing your clit in slow circles as he slowly enters another finger into you.

“You’re so tight.” He mutters, and his eyes are glued on your soaked cunt and the way it sucks his fingers in. He begins pumping his fingers in and out of you at a fast pace, curling them upwards, hitting a spot that makes you jerk your hips upward. 

“M-Mike, I’m gonna-” You start, but cut yourself off with a moan as Mike reattaches hip lips to your clit. With his fingers rapidly moving in and out of you, and his mouth doing god's work on your clit, you swear you’re starting to hear colours. Your thighs begin to shake as you start to grind yourself on Mike's face as you near your orgasm. You let out a loud moan as you finally release, the only thing you can feel is the pure pleasure surging through your body as you cum, and Mike coaxing you through it. Your breathing is heavy as you come down from your high. Mike removes his fingers and mouth from your pussy, pressing a final kiss to your clit before he stands back up in front of you. 

“Open your mouth.” He softly demands, and you do, letting Mike shove his cum covered fingers into your mouth. You swirl your tongue around the digits, humming as he lets his fingers travel to the back of your throat, making you gag. “That's it.” He praises, caressing your cheek as you suck his fingers. He removes his hand from your mouth and places them on your hips, helping you off the counter. He turns you around so you’re facing away from him, and he presses a hand to the centre of your back, bending you over the counter. He presses himself into you, and pushes your ass back against his covered erection. Mike leans over you, wrapping a hand around your throat to pull you up against his chest as he brings his lips to your ear.

“How could I forget about you when you look like a fucking angel when you cum.” He confesses in your ear, bucking his hips against you as he releases you, letting you fall back over the counter. The sound of him undoing his belt and pants makes you involuntarily clench your legs together, and you turn your head, watching as Mike spits in his hand and strokes himself a couple times before lining himself up with your pussy. 

“Have you been thinking about this?” Mike taunts, teasing the head of his cock up and down your slit. 

“You have no idea.” You whine, pushing your hips back in an attempt to just get Mike to fuck you. However, Mike holds your hips steady, restraining you from grinding back on him.

“Enlighten me, then.” Mike responds, like he has all the time in the world. But to you, it feels like the end of the world with the way your pussy is throbbing and in need of stimulation. A defeated sob leaves your lips at Mike’s teasing, 

“All the fucking time, Mike. I felt like I was going crazy.” You babble, and your words seem to be good enough for Mike, because he’s filling you up with his thick cock. All your thoughts, any worries you’ve had over the past week are gone. The only thing you can focus on is the way he fits perfectly inside you, and the way the grunts and groans leaving his lips sound like perfect melodies to your ears. His hips snap into yours roughly, and you know you’ll be sore tomorrow.

“I couldn’t get high without thinking about you. You fucking ruined weed for me.” Mike admits with a laugh, like the whole thing is preposterous. His fingers work quick circles on your clit and you shiver as Mike places a hand under your jaw, lifting you so he can press kisses into your neck.

“Good. Maybe you’ll smoke it less. It’s bad for your lungs.” You breathily tease, and Mike sucks a particularly dark spot into your neck in response to your words. Mike continues his rough pace, and you clench hard around him.

“Gonna cum.” You whine and Mike only continues to fuck you, wanting to get you there. You cum for the second time, your body jerking as the overwhelming sensation hits you. Mike holds your shaky body up as he cums inside of you, letting out a strained “fuck” as his own orgasm washes over him. You both stand there afterwards, catching your breath as Mike release slowly begins to leak out of you and down your thighs. 

“Did I seriously ruin weed for you?” You hoarsely ask in a disbelieving voice. You feel Mike’s chest rumble as he laughs, and actually, you think his laugh is the most perfect sounding melody.  

“Trust me, It’s embarrassing to admit.” He says, and you let out a quick breath as he pulls out of you. He grabs a cloth out of a kitchen drawer and runs it under warm water in the sink before cleaning up the cum between your legs. He tucks himself back into his boxers before pulling his pants up, and you follow suit. 

“Maybe I’m rubbing off on you.” You jest as you button your pants. 

“Maybe.” Mike says with a smile, and when you look at him, you think you wouldn’t even need weed to get high. You’d just need this feeling.

taglist: @slutf0rmilfs, @angie-likes-to-art, @spenciesprincess, @janitorhutcherson, @leahdhopkins4321, @pickingchoosinglovinghope, @esebabe, @under-sedationnn, @celestbarnes, @brechdan-ham, @souldzaboj, @t0byisher3, @rottingpeache, @joshs-big-toe, @p3talll

[luvj4key]

── to all the boys i've loved before

you write a letter when you get a feeling so intense that you can’t hold it in anymore. these letters are your most inner, personal thoughts that were kept safe in a little blue box that you stored in the top of the shelf. so how is it that heeseung convinced you to fake date him, jaeyun wrote your letter back, sunoo came out to you, and jungwon stop talking to you?

the blue box is missing and so are the four letters that you stamped and wrote their addresses on. 

casting: reader as lara jean, heeseung as peter kavinsky, jake as john ambrose, sunghoon as reader's older brother, jungwon as josh sanderson, jay as greg, sunoo as lucas, ni-ki as kitty | ft... yunjin as chris, chaewon as gen

directors' note: hello everyone! we are proud to announce that @j4keluver and i are doing a collab!! we will be making a series based on netflix's "to all the boys i've loved before" series. disclaimer: this is not an accurate representation of the series, we try to incorporate many details from them. this is our version of the series :) so we hope that you enjoy reading this as much enjoyed writing it <3

if you would like to be added to the taglist, click here !

₊˚⊹♡ 𝘁𝗼 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝘀 𝗶'𝘃𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲; ; 𝘁𝗼 𝘄𝗵𝗼𝗺 𝗶𝘁 𝗺𝗮𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗿𝗻, 𝗶 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 | wc: tbd

when you were a little girl, your mom would tell you the classic old tale bed time story of “princess and prince happy ever after.” she would talk about how lovely it is once you find “your prince,” the one who truly loves you for who you are. ever since then, you were hooked on romance novels - and finding the picture perfect boyfriend.

your older brother sunghoon, would roll his eyes at you, stating that “all men are disgusting shits and the only boy you can talk to is me.”  you would just wave him off and stick your tongue out that him, saying how he’s just mad that he hasn’t gotten a girlfriend and he mumbles a “whatever.”

the only issue with trying to find a boyfriend was that you DID NOT know how to express your intense feelings. so that’s when you started to write letter. these letters were the most intimate things you’ve probably ever written in your life besides smut on tumblr. there were four of them in total.

lee heeseung, your 7th grade crush and first kiss

sim jaeyun, your partner in model UN

kim sunoo, from homecoming

and

yang jungwon, your next door neighbor

teaser

play...

₊˚⊹♡ 𝘁𝗼 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝘀: 𝗽.𝘀. 𝗶 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 | wc: tbd

after the whole fake dating fiasco, you and heeseung seem to be doing perfect until it wasn’t.  a new problem snakes its way into you and heeseung’s relationship; jaeyun wrote back. yeah, remember the letter you wrote years ago but was sent out by your little brother who thought was doing you a massive favor? yes, that one. you had no idea THE jaeyun would write back. you really did not need this right now especially since you and heeseung are in a good place.

there was two ways you could deal with this; respond to the letter or ignore it and pretend that it doesn’t exist. the two options lead to one option for your relationship; don’t tell heeseung. it’s not that you didn’t want to but everything was so good right now. why ruin it with a letter that probably only talks about jaeyun’s acceptance into NASA as a quantum physicist… right?

play...

₊˚⊹♡ 𝘁𝗼 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝘀: 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 | wc: tbd

your recent trip to korea made you realize two major things; you have go to start learning more korean besides duolingo and you can’t be away from heeseung too long. the countdown till graduation has started and with college decisions coming around the corner, life was falling into the perfect book ending.you knew heeseung’s dream school was stanford;  it’s always been stanford. with his good GPA, athletic abilities, and extracurricular, it’s not shock that he gets accepted. you get ready to open your letter. this was it. you guys were going to be high school sweethearts that turn into college sweethearts that turn into husband and wife.

that whole image comes crashing down when you see that you’ve been rejected and the only thing on your mind is how are you going to tell heeseung? heeseung keeps pestering you about your status until you do what you do best when nervous : lie. he’s bouncing off the walls when you tell him, it’s all he can talk about. he starts to plan how much to deposit for your shared apartment on your senior class trip to new york city !

whoopsie, how are you gonna tell him that you DIDN’T get accepted into stanford and that nyu, a college almost 3,000 miles away, is becoming your dream school?

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this is a work of fiction. it does not depict any of the artists in any way, shape. or form. ©luvj4key and j4keluver, all work is written by us. do not copy or repost

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Imagines: Kindergarten

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summary: after your daughters 4th birthday, her first day of kindergarten hits your husband joe like a brick wall. you seem to be the only person that can make him feel remotely any better about his first born growing up.

warnings: none, fluff

pairing: joe burrow x reader

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shortly after savanna’s 4th birthday the realization that she'd be off to kindergarten soon hit joe like a brick.

joe was so nervous about the whole thing, even though he was gone a lot because of football he always knew that his little girl was safe with his wife or other family members. the thought of his first born being in a building with complete strangers freaked him out. y/n tried her best to calm her husband down, reassuring him that sav would do great because of her social personality.

"what is she misses us?" - joe

"listen, she's going to be too distracted with making friends and learning to even think about us joe." - you

y/n hoped that attending the open house would ease some of joes worries because he'd be able to meet the woman that would be sav's teacher along with being able to explore the place his daughter would be 4 hours a day and 4 days a week.

while there, sav was shown her cubby, her assigned seat, and she met her teacher Mrs. Martin. after sav talked to her teacher for a little bit, you suggested she go play with some of her classmates while you and joe talked to Mrs. Martin.

you asked questions, and observed that Mrs. Martin had a passion for teaching by how she talked about it.

due to the fact it was a private school, sav had to take tests to get in. there were just a couple things that they had as requirements for the kids to know before hand. joe was the one that taught her everything, there were many nights that you two would be sitting in bed and joe would be making flashcards to test sav on the next morning. you found it cute. joes nerdy side had been one of your favorite things about him since you were introduced to it in the beginning of your relationship.

Mrs. Martin quickly noticed how joe kept nervously looking at sav playing with the other kids instead of intently listening to what she was saying like you were.

"she's going to do great Mr. Burrow, her test scores have been astounding and she has exceptional social skills for her age. you've prepared her well." - Mrs. Martin

"i know she will. it's just hard, she's my first born and she's growing up so fast.." - joe

Mrs. Martin nodded before she moved on to talk to other parents.

that night after tucking sav in, joe cuddled up to you in bed.

"you okay?" - you laced your fingers into his hair, knowing it comforted him

"no." - joe sniffled

"she's gonna do great joey.." - you kissed his forehead

"i just can't believe she's old enough to be in school. i know it's just kindergarten but then comes 8th grade graduation.. and the next thing you know she's off to college." - joe cried

"baby..." - you held joe in your chest

"i know you're probably thinking i'm just being overdramatic.." - joe

"no, not at all joe. how about we get some sleep though, okay?" - you

"okay. can you hold me?" - joe

"of course" - you wrapped your arms around him and entangled your legs with his

(y/n's pov)

the next morning was even more rough. joe tried to busy himself by getting up super early and making pancakes for sav, along with checking her backpack three times to make sure she had everything and packing her lunch.

when i woke sav up to start getting her ready for her first day, she seemed excited to go to school.

after i got her in her first day dress, she told me about everything she was looking forward to as i curled her bleach blonde hair.

once she was completely ready i told her that breakfast was waiting for her downstairs.

"morning dada!!" - savanna yelled when she saw joe sitting at the kitchen counter

"mornin princess! you excited for school?" - joe

"yup! i like school." - savanna

"you need to eat your pancakes real quick so we can get going." - joe

in the time span of sav eating her pancakes, joe and i had gotten dressed and were ready to go.

as i was getting all of sav’s extra stuff put in the backseat, along with a gift basket for her teacher, in the corner of my eye i saw the sweetest sight. sav had her backpack on, lunchbox in hand and joe had her posed in front of the front door as he took pictures of her.

when joe told her that he was done she ran over to the car and climbed in, leaving joe and i alone for a second.

"i wish we would've picked the homeschooling option." - joe

"well with how much you're away because of football it would be more me then we.” - you

"exactly why we didn't pick the homeschooling option." - joe kissed your cheek

"i love you." - you smiled

"love you too, babe." - joe

you held joes hand the entire way to the school and you felt his grip get tighter as you guys pulled into the parking lot.

"i'm gonna stay in the car, you okay to walk her up there?" - you

"yeah, i'd prefer it actually. i’ll be right back, momma." - joe kissed you before he got out of the car

"bye savvy! have a good day!" - you watched joe get her out of her car seat

"bye momma!" - savanna replied before joe shut the door

joe held sav tightly as he walked up to the door.

"good morning miss savanna! morning Mr. Burrow!" - Mrs. Martin

"mornin!" - savanna

joe put sav down and crouched down. he had to grab her hands before she could run away.

"you're gonna do great sweetheart. remember everything i taught you?" - joe

"yup!" - savanna

"you're so smart princess, just like your momma." - joe smiled

"can i go? i wanna play!" - savanna

"yup, here give me a hug before you go." - joe

sav wrapped her small arms around joes neck as he hugged her tight. he really didn't want to let go.

"have a good day okay? you can tell me all about it when i pick you up." - joe

"i will daddy!" - savanna

joe hugged her one last time and placed a kiss on her cheek.

once he stood up, sav was ready to take off into the school.

"bye, sweetie." - joe attempted to smile

"bye dada!" - savanna turned around and ran into the building

joe stood there for a few seconds and watched her walk up to a couple other girls her age and then put her backpack in her cubby that was in the hallway in front of the classroom.

"you need a tissue?" - Mrs. Martin

joe didn't even realize he was crying till she said that.

"nah i'm good... i'm gonna get going." - joe

your heart broke when you saw joe slowly walking back to the car. he was visibly upset. that was a rare case when it came to joe.

once you guys got to the house and the twins were occupied in their room, you attempted to console joe.

"you need to relax a bit baby.." - you hugged him

"i know.. i really don't know why this is so hard for me." - joe

"your first born starting school is a big deal, most parents have the same reaction." - you

"mhm. i cant wait to pick her up." - joe laid his head on your shoulder as you rubbed his back

"you need to distract yourself. don't you have some film to watch?" - you

"yeah, i do actually. i'll be in the office if you need me, okay?" - joe

"okay." - you smiled and pecked his lips

the remainder of the day at home, joe tried to distract himself by watching film and occasionally playing around with the you.

but, with all the time you'd spent being with joe you could easily read him. you could tell he was counting down the hours till it would be time to pick sav up from school.

you were washing dishes with your airpods in when all of a sudden joe rushed into the kitchen and grabbed his car keys off the key hanger.

you paused your music and stopped your husband before he ran out of the kitchen and into the garage.

"joe.. baby where are you going?" - you

"the school." - joe

"school doesn't end for another 45 minutes.. we live 15 minutes away." - you

"i know. i want to go early and wait in the parking lot." - joe

you couldn't help but smile; this overprotective dad side of joe was so lovable.

joe still stood there, waiting to hear what you were going to reply with. almost as if he was asking for approval.

"okay, i'll see you in a bit then?" - you

"yeah. bye, i love you!" - joe turned and walked into the garage

"bye, love you!" - you

joe sat in the parking lot of the school for over 30 minutes. he sat scrolling on his phone, kid cudi playing lowly through the cars speakers.

as soon as the clock hit 1:30, joe got out of the car and hurried up to the door. he was the first person in line.

his anxiety levels shot up when a minute had passed and the doors hadn't opened yet.

at 1:32 there was still no sign of the doors opening so he texted you to verify the time sav was dismissed.

hubby💕 - school ends at 1:30 right? it's almost been three minutes and the doors haven't opened  yet

before you could even answer, the doors opened and Mrs. Martin wasn't at all surprised to see that joe was the first parent in line.

"savanna burrow!" - Mrs. Martin called out

sav ran outside and up to her dad, joes face lit up as he reached down to grab her hand before walking back to the car.

"how was your day?" - joe

"awesome! i love school. i made a friend! her name is summer!" - sam

"thats greet sweetie. so you're excited to go back tomorrow?" - joe

"yup!" - sam

“i’m so glad you had fun, princess. wanna go to the store with me to get momma some flowers? she needs something after putting up with me today.” - joe mumbled the last part

“sure, daddy!” - sam giggled

god, joe loved his girls.

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authors note: fluffy dad joe is my favorite ❤️

hope you enjoyed! ❤️

[mvybanks]

illicit affairs

a/n: first of all this fic is inspired by so many songs i’ve lost count but illicit affairs by taylor swift is my fav. i’ve never written such a long fic so give me some feedback if you want. hope you like it!

warnings: ANGST, mentions of sex and descriptions of intimacy but there’s nothing explicit, alcohol

word count: 8.0k

pairing: jj x routledge!reader

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no one has ever said that a friends with benefits arrangement is a good decision, especially when it’s made between two friends who are already secretly in love with each other, but hey, if it had been the smart thing to do then you and jj wouldn’t have done it in the first place.

stupid things have good outcomes all the time.

that was his motto and you trusted him, so that was how he started finding himself in your bed on the weekends and how you found yourself in his during the week. it wasn’t something new, you two had been fighting the sexual tension between you for too long, and you had given in during alcohol filled nights way too many times. therefore, the agreement worked well for the two of you. you had only two rules: ‘1. stay friends, no matter what; 2. no strings attached.’

“no feelings involved,” you had told him, “i mean i know we care about each other or we wouldn’t be friends, but we can’t have real feelings”

“and what happens if we do?” he had asked you, as if you weren’t already hopelessly in love with each other.

“then we break it off, but we gotta talk to each other.”

it didn’t have to last long either. this new type of relationship started in june and you were supposed to leave for college in september. after highschool, you had decided to take a very needed gap year. you had fun with your friends and worked to help your brother, john b, with the bills and to save your money. when you got accepted, it didn’t feel real; you didn’t know that things like this could happen to you.

but that also meant leaving the island. no more friends. no more living with your brother. no more jj. that was why you decided you were going to spend as much time with him as you could. sure, at first you didn’t mean under the sheets, but you weren’t complaining.

john b couldn’t know about this, though. the amount of times he had told his best friend to not fool around with his sister should’ve scared jj, instead, like a moth to a flame, it only brought you two closer. maybe a little bit too close. you both knew you were playing with fire, yet you never realized you were playing yourselves all along, sticking to a relationship that was bound to end in a heartache.

every look. every touch. every kiss. they all meant more than what you told yourselves, but the only thing you knew how to do was bask in the comforting feeling of each other’s skin as you filled the room with empty words and pleasure filled cries of the other’s name. the important words, the ones that held so much power over the two of you, were hidden in the way he held you each night as he tried to engrave in his memory every single inch of you.

it was almost embarrassing how all it took for him to come running was one text from you. just one, and he dropped whatever he was doing to feel you again. it didn’t matter if the last time he had touched you was only a couple of hours prior, he always wanted you. he wished sex wasn’t the one thing you called him for but if that was the only way to be with you, then he knew he was lucky enough to have you in his life at all.

little routledge: hey, john b’s working tonight. you want to come over?

one text. he lied to his boss and told him he was probably coming down with something and then ran to his bike to get to you. clothes ripped apart as you both couldn’t wait to get your hands on each other. his eager kisses on your exposed skin sent you on another planet as he made you feel like you were the only person in the whole world for him, and, unbeknownst to you, you were.

“shit - i missed you so much, baby,” he said with his hands groping your body as he hovered above you.

“we had sex this morning, j,” you giggled, but you couldn’t deny your need for him.

“it’s never enough. i’ll never get tired of this.”

everything worked perfectly. then why was there always that impending sense of doom at the pit of your stomach? you knew the answer to that, but you tried to push it away as long as you could. you just wanted to savor those last moments with him, because you didn’t know when you were going to be able to come back home once you started college; and even if you did have the chance to go home, you would never be able to be alone with him, not like that.

“you’re so beautiful. how can you be so beautiful?” he mumbled against your skin, one night, as he peppered your neck and collarbone with kisses.

you ran your fingers through his hair and closed your eyes, enjoying every little bit of attention he was giving to you and your body, although you knew that none of it was real.

“you still with me, baby?” he asked as he looked at you with a worried expression. you hadn’t said anything in a long time and he was scared that you were feeling uncomfortable.

“yeah. just - don’t say things you don’t mean, please.”

his eyes bored into yours as he tried to find the right words. jj got off your body and lied next to you, then he took the white sheet of his bedding and laid it on you, covering your exposed self. his arm went around your shoulders before he whispered, “c’mere,” in that sweet tone of his you loved. you obliged and got closer to him, although you still couldn’t understand what he was doing.

“i’ve never told you things i don’t mean, you know? when i tell you that you’re beautiful, i mean it. when i say that i want you, i mean it. so now i’m going to hold you all night and let you sleep in my arms because i mean it, and tomorrow morning i’ll fuck you like you deserve and i’ll mean it.”

you were left speechless and weren’t even given the time to react at his words as he continued, “goodnight, baby,” he said before hugging you tighter to his chest as you let his words sink in.

the words ‘what are we?’ were always on the tip of your tongue. do friends talk to each other the way you did? do they know what makes the other moan in pleasure? is it possible that friends crave each other’s touch like they crave oxygen? is that what friends do?

all your questions were answered in one night. you were at a party, letting loose and drinking with your friends, not even worrying about looking for someone you could be interested in because you already knew in whose bed you were supposed to end up in at the end of the night. you could feel his hungry gaze on your figure as you let your hips move to the music and you were only waiting for him to come up to you and drag you to his house.

but he never did. jj wanted you, more than he ever wanted anyone else in his life, and that scared him. he couldn’t have you and he wasn’t even sure you wanted the same things as he did from you. when another woman approached him, he didn’t deny her advances and let her hands touch his exposed arm, as he tried to forget what your touch would feel like instead of hers.

you saw everything. it shouldn’t have fazed you, he wasn’t yours, then why was your heart clenching at the sight? why could you feel even your ears turn red from the jealousy? and then you thought to yourself that two could play at that game. maybe it was just sex to him, you believed, but you knew that he was the most possessive guy you’ve ever met and he’d go mad over someone else touching you.

when you noticed a man’s eyes on you, watching you from afar as he sipped on the drink in his hand, you smiled at him, giving him the green light. he walked over to you and introduced himself.

“you wanna get out of here?” he asked after you had been flirting for a while.

you thought about your answer. did you really want to do this? he was handsome, you couldn’t deny that, and he also seemed like a good guy, but you weren’t sure you wanted to leave the party with him.

“sorry, i don’t think so,” you said apologetically.

he nodded, “hey, no need to apologize, i get it. can i ask you out though? i’d like to see you again.”

“yes,” you replied without thinking.

shit.

you couldn’t take it back at that point. you exchanged numbers before you saw jj walking towards you, an angry expression on his face.

“i’ll see you around, okay?” you wanted to get rid of him before jj would have the chance to ruin everything.

“yeah. i’ll call you.”

you met the blond halfway and waited for the rage fit he was about to have.

“who the hell was that?” he asked, pointing at the other man.

you shrugged, “just a guy who asked me out.”

he was seeing red. how could you even think about letting someone else touch you the way only he was allowed to?

“didn’t look like you were rejecting him.”

“‘cause i didn’t.”

he grabbed your arm and dragged you away from the rest of the party. that wasn’t a scene for everyone to see.

“you can’t go out with him,” he ordered once you were far away enough from everyone.

“and who are you to say that? it’s not like we’re together, is it?”

he swallowed thickly while his eyes were focused on yours, saying a thousand words, “i don’t want you to go out with other people.”

“you’re drunk, jj. go home.”

as you tried to leave, he stopped you by reaching for your forearm again.

“we need to talk,” he said through gritted teeth.

“we’ll talk in the morning, when you’re be sober and are thinking clearly. go home.”

the thing was that jj had never thought more clearly than he was in that moment. he wanted you and he knew he couldn’t see anyone else in his place. you were his. that was how much he knew.

the next morning, he came over to the chateau. when he opened the door, you were in the kitchen, making coffee and trying to look awake after the restless night you had just had. yet, you were still perfect in his eyes. the way your messy hair was held together in a bun, your pyjama shorts gave him the perfect sight of your exposed thighs and he couldn’t help but notice that the shirt you were wearing was his and how it hung loose on your body. his hands itched to touch you.

“good morning,” he mumbled, catching your attention.

“morning.”

“how did you sleep?”

you rolled your eyes at him, “i’m tired, jj. let’s just cut to the chase. what happened last night?”

he sighed and decided to sit on a stool, “i don’t know. listen, i know you didn’t mean what you said-“

“what?” you interrupted him immediately.

“well, you were pretty mad. i thought you wanted to apologize for what you said,” he admitted as he looked at you with a confused expression.

you laughed incredulously at him, “jj, i told you to come here so that you’d have the chance to apologize to me!”

“why would i do that? i did nothing wrong!”

“you told me you don’t want me to go out with other people as if you were going out with me and then you didn’t give me an explanation!” you tried to keep your voice as low as you could since your brother was sleeping in his room but the man in front of you was making it very hard to keep your composure.

“what explanation do you need? i don’t want another man touching you the way i should! i thought that was pretty clear,” he said as he stood up from his seat.

“why? why don’t you want another man touching me?”

you wanted him - no, you needed him to admit how he felt about you.

“because i’m the only one who’s allowed to touch you,” and his voice was stern, no turning back.

“and who says that? we’re friends, aren’t we? what if i want to go out with someone else? you’re a friend. that’s what you want,” you punctuated your words by pointing at his chest.

“if you want to go out with him, then do it. but don’t come cry to me when he doesn’t make you feel the way i do.”

you shook your head and looked at the ground, “what the hell are we doing, jj? what is this?”

when he didn’t give you an answer, you lifted your head and stared at his conflicted look, “do you want us to be friends?”

“it doesn’t matter what i want,” he said bitterly.

“yes, it does!”

“it doesn’t! what do you want, y/n?”

the question left you speechless. what did you want? “i - i…” you were going to leave in a two weeks, did you really want to make him suffer by telling him that you wanted much more than just sex? “i don’t know.”

he shook his head as a humorless laugh left his lips, “you know what? i’m done,” jj snapped, hurt written across his features.

“done? with what?”

he gestured between the two of you, “with this. with us. with the whole friends with benefits thing. i-i can’t do it, i can’t pretend anymore! let’s stop before one of us gets hurt,” although he already was.

“jj-“ you began as you started to see the pain in his eyes.

“no,” he interrupted you immediately, “we said no strings attached, so that’s what i’m doing. i’m giving you an out.”

he didn’t want you to stay away from him, he craved your touch more often than he would’ve liked to admit but if you didn’t feel the same he couldn’t put himself through that heartache.

a moment passed before you had the courage to speak again, “are we still friends?”

a simple question. you had always been sure of the answer but in that moment everything changed and you two became suddenly strangers. he thought about what to say to you, the word ‘yes’ would’ve left such a bitter taste in his mouth, the realization that he was just your friend again hurt.

“i don’t know,” and he was honest as he didn’t want to lose you but he couldn’t see you with anyone else either.

your eyes were welling up with tears, you didn’t want this to end, “we said that whatever happened between us, it didn’t have to ruin our friendship. you can’t break the rule”

‘1. stay friends; 2. no strings attached’

“that’s not the only rule i’ve broken”

the pounding of your heart was the only sound you were able to hear, “what?” you swallowed thickly, “listen, i just want us to be friends again. i don’t wanna lose you”

jj stood there, shaking his head and running his hands through his hair in frustration, and he couldn’t take it anymore, “how can i be your friend? how can i do that when i know what your body feels like underneath mine? how can i just be your friend when i know what you sound like when you moan my name? those are not things friends should know. that’s not what friends do. friends don’t kiss like we do and you know it!”

you were looking at him with teary eyes, your instinct screaming at you to run to him. he rubbed his hands on his face, clearly shocked of what he just said to you.

“j, please-“ you tried to say as you began to get closer to him.

“no, listen just go out on that date. you’re free, you don’t have to worry about me anymore. i have to go.”

he turned around and slammed the front door behind him, leaving you a mess and your heart broken for him.

you. i want you.

that was what you wanted to scream at him. but as you tried to protect the both of you, you ended up hurting yourself and ruining your friendship with jj.

you didn’t see much of him the following week. he came over to the chateau but barely talked to you. your friends noticed the shift between you two but never mentioned it, they all knew something was going on but none of them wanted to be part of it because it was obvious that whatever it was, it would’ve upset your brother.

on saturday, exactly one week before your departure, he was hanging around at yours, playing cards with john b and pope on the porch as you tried to take a nap. everything had been so crazy lately as you were getting ready to leave your childhood home.

when you got out of your room to get some water, you were taken aback by jj’s presence. apparently, he had had the same idea as you, standing in front of the fridge with a water bottle in his hand.

“hi,” you said as you found yourself in front of him.

he only nodded once at you before closing the fridge and walking past you.

“right,” you whispered to yourself. you knew he was mad but you didn’t expect him to just ignore you completely.

regret was eating him inside. you didn’t deserve to be treated like that. jj turned around and let himself have a look at you. he had missed you so much in that week and he didn’t know how he was supposed to go on with his life without you for months.

“i made a mistake,” he said, although you were still facing the refrigerator, “when i asked you to be friends with benefits, i made a mistake.”

you finally turned to him and almost gulped at the sight of his intense gaze, “i don’t wanna hear this, jj.”

“i think you want to,” he walked closer to you and caged you between his body and the kitchen counter with his arms on either side of you, “because my mistake was assuming that we were ever friends in the first place.”

you inhaled sharply, the smell of his cheap cologne making your insides twist with desire as you had missed the feeling of his perfume surrounding you, “my brother is outside, j,” you whispered.

he only pressed his body further against yours while your lips were now dangerously close to his, “did you go out with that guy?”

the question caught you completely off guard, but it was obvious that he was ruining himself just to get you to answer to him, “no.”

“why?” his head lowered to your neck as you closed your eyes and instinctively threw your head back to give him more access while your hands flew in his hair.

“i didn’t want him.”

at your words he nipped the exposed skin of your neck and your breath got heavier. he started leaving wet kisses down to your collarbone, “i miss you, baby.”

you sighed, “i miss you, too, j, but we can’t-“

he raised his head again and rested his forehead against yours, “look me in the eyes and tell me we were friends,” he was pleading you to finally admit what you both knew very well.

“j-“

“please.”

you only stared into his eyes, a look you had never seen in them and that you couldn’t really decipher. your hands were still on the nape of his neck as you let your eyes flicker to his lips for a second, but he noticed it. he leaned in, brushing his lips against yours for a moment as you both closed your eyes, savoring the feeling you had missed so much.

however, the moment didn’t last long as you heard the sound of the door opening, “jj, did you fall or s-“ pope stopped in his tracks when he saw the both of you jumping away from each other.

“i - i’ll be right out,” he stuttered while you were trying to regain your breath, although you hadn’t even realized you were holding it until everything stopped, and you avoided pope’s eyes.

he stood there, his mouth agape as he couldn’t believe you two were kissing when john b was literally on the other side of the door, “pope, get out, please,” jj said.

“no, jj. i think it’s best if you get out right now,” his friend added as he lowered his voice.

you looked at jj and nodded at him, “go.”

he ran his hands through his hair and released a puff of air before following his friend’s order. pope stayed inside and looked at you, “pope-“ you started, but he interrupted you, “i won’t say anything.”

“thank you.”

“y/n, you’re leaving in a week,” he reminded you, as if it wasn’t the only thing on your mind.

“i know.”

as you started walking back to your room, his words stopped you again, “listen, i love you both, you’re my friends. i don’t want you two to hurt each other.”

“huh,” you said with a sad smile, “too late for that.”

jj didn’t talk to you for the rest of the week, completely avoiding you and everything that included you this time. he was running away from his feelings, confusing you with every action, or lack thereof, he made.

one day. that was all you had left in the outer banks before leaving and he still refused to talk to you. when john b told you that he was throwing you an away party with the pogues you thought jj was going to be there, but when he didn’t show up you knew it was time to make things clear.

after the party, you sneaked out and drove the twinkie to his house. he had to give you an explanation. he couldn’t just go around, kissing you and telling you that he misses you and then start avoiding you the next day; it wasn’t fair.

when you found yourself outside the front door of his small home, you knocked on the door, gently at first and then it progressively began to be more demanding and insistent as no answer came. you saw his bike on the lawn so you knew he was in there.

“jj! open this fucking door right now!” you all but yelled.

he finally got the courage to get up from the couch he was lying on and face you, “what?” he said as soon as he opened the door.

“what?” you echoed, conflicted between crying or laughing at the coldness of his tone, “i’m leaving tomorrow and you’ve been avoiding me for a week! what the hell, jj?”

he avoided your eyes and shrugged, “just starting to get used to you being away.”

you chuckled humorlessly, knowing full well that wasn’t the real reason, “really? is that why you won’t even look me in the eyes? talk to me, for god’s sake!”

“what do you want me to say? i think i’ve said enough to you,” he snapped.

as he tried to close the door, you stopped him and quickly entered the house, “you’ve said nothing! stop being a coward! were you planning on saying goodbye to me?”

“leave,” he said sternly. he couldn’t even be in the same room as you without having the urge to wrap you in his arms.

“no. answer me. were you planning on saying goodbye to me?”

“no! i won’t say goodbye!”

you almost flinched, “why?”

“because it hurts! is that what you wanted to hear? you wanted to hear that the thought of you leaving this island for good is tearing me apart? that looking at you is hurting me? is that what you wanted to hear? huh?” he paced around the room and grabbed his hair with his hands.

“jj, it’s tearing me apart, too,” you said more calmly this time.

“no, you don’t understand!” he stopped his movements and walked closer to you, “after everything we’ve been through, this is how it ends. do you have any idea how much i care about you? how much i’m gonna miss you? god, y/n, i’m - i - shit.”

you closed the gap between you two and rested your hands on his chest, looking up at the blue eyes you’ve known since you were a kid, “what? you what, j?”

jj sighed and shook his head, “i - i can’t say it.”

“then show it to me.”

he didn’t waste a second before his mouth was on yours, kissing you hungrily as you hadn’t touched each other in one long, agonizing week. you didn’t know how you were supposed to survive months without him.

he held your body close to his, but he needed more. he needed to engrave in his memory the feeling of your skin, the softness of your lips, the scent of your sweet perfume. he craved the sight of you falling apart in his hands, unraveling just for him.

his hands grabbed your exposed skin wherever it was possible, feeling the need to have you, while your hands tugged at his hair and his shirt, pulling him impossibly closer to you. jj pinned you against the wall as the kiss turned even more heated. he didn’t know how to put into words his feelings without hurting but he knew how to show them, so that’s exactly what he did.

if that was going to be the last time then he would’ve made it worthy of your time. the way he grabbed you, threw you on his bed and worshiped your body showed you exactly how much he needed you. he made you come undone under him over and over again, until you could barely breathe, but you weren’t going to stop him. you let him do to you whatever he wanted because, for one last night, you wanted to feel his, completely giving yourself to him. both yours and his actions said more than a thousand words would have as you held each other close.

you managed to fall asleep for only a couple of hours, before the alarm you had set for that morning started ringing from your phone. jj’s arms tightened around your naked body as you turned the alarm off and then rested your head back on his chest. you lied on his body completely, your arms wrapped around his torso as you were scared to get up and face the real world.

“j, i have to go,” you whispered as you tried not to cry.

he shut his eyes tightly and kissed your head, “that was the perfect last night. right?” he asked, although he wasn’t able to hide the breaking of his voice.

“it didn’t have to be the last, j. we could-“

“no.”

he swore he had never felt so much pain inside in whole life; even the tip of his fingertips hurt. he couldn’t bear the ‘maybe’s and the ‘what if’s, he needed to see the truth in front of him: you were leaving. that was all he knew.

you raised your head and cradled his face in one hand, “i don’t want this to end,” you mumbled.

jj looked away from you, “you should go. you’re gonna be late.”

you knew that it had to end but you didn’t want it to end like that. your heart broke in a thousand of pieces when he didn’t spare you one look as you got up from his warm body and began gathering your clothes. your hands were shaking when you put your clothes on, the heartbreak was ruining you.

he only sat up in his bed but still refused to glance at you. your hand touched the door handle before you turned around and decided that it was then or never.

“just give me one reason; one reason why I should come back,” you pleaded, tears welling up in your eyes, “that’s all i’m asking, j. please”

he finally looked up at you, bloodshot eyes staring into yours, “i can’t. there are no reasons.”

“then i hope you’re happy, i hope that never seeing me again is what you want,” you can’t stop your tears anymore as they stream down your face freely, “i know you won’t but don’t call me, don’t make this harder than it already is for me.”

as your hand goes to open the door, he stops you. his fingers tightly wrapped around your arm while you took a shaky breath at the sudden closeness. your heavy breaths mixed together and you waited for him to talk, to tell you to stay, to kiss you, to just do something, but he didn’t.

“are you going to let me go?” you both knew what your question meant; you weren’t only referring to his hand around your arm, but to yourself, to the relationship, to everything that you two shared together: was he going to let that go?

that was when the conversation he had with pope a couple of days prior flashed in front of his eyes. his friend had advised him to be careful and to not ruin a lifelong friendship if he wasn’t serious. but the words that were echoing in his mind in that moment were the ones he said after:

“if you really love her, let her go, jj. if it’s meant to be, you’ll find each other again.”

he closed his eyes and swallowed, “i’m sorry,” was all he said before taking his hand off and watching you leave, and for all he knew that was going to be the last time.

his heart ached for you, his whole chest felt like it was on fire while he couldn’t stop his tears. everything felt like it was out of his hands but it was his fault.

he’s the one that made you cry, the one that broke both his and your heart, he started that stupid arrangement and put an end to it, he pushed you away, he let you go. it was his fault because he got greedy, wanting more from you, and he fell in love with you even though he shouldn’t have. now, he had to deal with the consequences

he never even showed up at the airport. he never said goodbye properly, too busy blaming himself for breaking the best thing that ever happened to him.

he hurt you and he promised himself he’d never do it again, but he did by not being there for you that morning.

“he’s not coming, is he?” you asked when you finished saying your goodbyes. pope looked at you and shook his head.

“i’m sorry, i tried calling him but it keeps going to voicemail.”

“it’s not your fault,” you smiled sadly at him.

a part of you wished he would have come running through the door and apologize for everything he said, but he never did.

three weeks later

jj lied limp on his bed, the sweatshirt you left at his place still smelled like you and it was the only thing that still brought him comfort. bottles of beers and cheap whiskey littered the room as a reminder of everything he wanted to forget about but couldn’t.

he missed you.

he reached for his phone countless of times, looking at your contact and wishing he could call you and hear your sweet voice, yet he knew you would never even pick up. he was certain you hated him and he admitted that you had every right to do so.

but waking up without you was so hard, falling asleep without you in his arms was impossible, so he thought that alcohol was the only way to cope with your absence. getting drunk by noon, avoiding his friends and trying to forget, forget, forget.

how could he ever forget you?

his friends were worried about him, but none of them really knew what he was going through, because whatever was going on between you two was a dirty little secret, something to hide, a love that no one was supposed to know about.

however, pope had always been the smartest one. he already knew about your agreement, but it was easy to figure out that the blond had fallen hopelessly in love with you.

when he saw his friend at the boneyard, he knew it was time to talk. he had had enough. pope dragged jj back to the chateau, a beer bottle hanging from his friend’s hand as he threw him on the couch of the porch.

he snatched the bottle from his fingers, “jj, stop. you’ve been drinking like a damn alcoholic, what the hell is going on with you?”

jj only shrugged, a look pope had never seen before adorning his features. he was empty.

“i need to forget,” he slurred.

“what?”

“i drink, i forget. that’s how it’s supposed to be right? it’s always worked. but this time, i can’t. i forgot my address last night, literally couldn’t remember where i live and she was still on my damn mind. i could still remember her face, her name, her perfume, her touch. everything. and if you would’ve asked me my name i’m not sure i would’ve guessed right,” he chuckled humorlessly at his last sentence.

pope sighed and sat next to his friend.

“jj, she left. you told me what happened between you two but you never told me why you didn’t say goodbye at the airport. what’s going on?”

jj looked away, almost disgusted and ashamed of himself, “she hates me.”

“you know she doesn’t.”

“she’s gone, pope. she’s gone and she hates me. you didn’t see the way she looked at me when she left; i hurt her and i hate myself for it too. but i miss her - god if i miss her. i can’t breathe when i think about her, it’s like everything around me is fake and she was the only real part of my life and now she doesn’t want to see me anymore. she told me not to call her, did you know that? i can’t stop thinking about her, i need her. everyday of my miserable life, i need her. living without her is not living, i’m in pain all the time and i don’t know how to make it stop. please, make it stop, help me, man.”

he was pleading, the alcohol already cursing through his system and making him spill everything, because he couldn’t keep it in anymore.

“jj-“ he started, but jj didn’t know he wanted to warn him about the presence of someone else.

“i know i fucked it up. it’s my fault, but i didn’t want to lose her. she’s - fuck, she’s everything. she ripped my heart out of my chest and took it with her, and you wanna know something else? i don’t fucking care because i want her to keep my heart. i don’t want anyone else to have it, it’s hers, it’s never been mine. i’m in fucking pieces without her. you wanted to know why i’ve been drinking, now you got your answer.”

“then why are you still here, you moron?!” that was when he finally noticed john b, standing behind him with a shocked and angry expression.

“i - i can explain-“ to say he was shitting himself is an understatement, but john b wasn’t there to yell at him, or at least not for sleeping with his sister.

“yeah, you better explain. you gotta explain why you’re here, crying like a fucking baby about how in love you are with my sister instead of running after her. i heard you, i heard everything. you gotta talk to her.”

jj didn’t know if it was his inebriated state but was john b really telling him to be with you?

“she doesn’t want to talk to me, john b, and i don’t blame her,” he put his head in his hands as he sighed.

“then make her listen to you. when was the last time you felt like this about someone?”

“never. it’s always been her.”

john b could only nod his head, still incredulous that his best friend finally realized his feelings for you. he had always suspected something but he hadn’t understood how real his feelings were until he heard him talk about you. he couldn’t let jj throw everything way.

“you owe it to yourself, jj. you owe it to my sister. so run to her and tell her how you feel.”

he shook his head, “she’s thousand of miles away from here. how can i run to her?”

“uhh, i don’t know, jj. take a fricking plane? ask me for the address of her dorm?” he humored him.

“oh right, i forgot about all the money i have lying around that i can use to buy a ticket.”

“jj, are you willing to do this?” he finally asked.

“i’d do anything for her, i just need her to know that i love her.”

john b went inside the chateau, leaving the two confused boys outside on the porch.

“what just happened?” pope asked.

“i’m not sure…” jj trailed off.

when the brunette came back, he was playing with the stack of money he had in his hands, held together by a rubber band.

“i was saving this money to surprise her and fly to her but…i think you need this more than i do. she needs to see you and listen to you in person.”

the blond was speechless, “ i - i can’t let you do this, jb. why are you doing this?”

“because i care about her and i know now you’re supposed to be together.”

jj stood up and hugged his friend, grateful that he was giving him the green light.

“thank you, jb.”

“c’mon,” he said patting his back, “i’ll drive you.”

the pair drove to the airport in silence, although jj’s mind was going crazy. what was he supposed to tell you? he broke your heart, he couldn’t just expect you to forgive him because he was in love with you.

meanwhile, hours later, you were sitting on your bed, trying to reach your brother, when your roommate sat next to you.

“are you sure you don’t want to go out with us tonight?” she asked, worried about her new friend.

“i’m okay. i usually call my brother on fridays and i’m kinda freaking out because he’s not answering.”

“maybe he’s busy. listen, if you want to be with us, you know where to find us, okay?”

you nodded and watched as she got out of the room, leaving you with your thoughts. john b never forgot about your weekly calls, sometimes he was the one to call you first, so what was the problem? why wasn’t he answering?

when you called sarah and she also told you she didn’t know where he was, you were stumped. there was only one person who would know where your brother was but you refused to call him. he ended it.

and there he was, on your mind again, despite all your efforts to forget about him, he was always there. you knew these things take time but it hurt. your heart ached just thinking about him.

you were suddenly distracted by the gentle knock on your door, which made you furrow your eyebrows in confusion.

“emma, did you forget your keys a-“

you never knew it was possible to actually feel your heart skipping a beat and then thump out of your chest at the same time, but apparently everything is possible.

everything. even seeing your childhood best friend, the guy that broke your heart, the same one that you couldn’t stop thinking about, outside your dorm room. your breath was knocked out of your lungs.

“hi,” he said with his hands in his front pockets, as if he didn’t just travel thousands of miles to see you.

“jj…” you didn’t know what to say, completely taken aback from the sight of him outside your room, “what are you doing here? did something happen? is john b okay?”

“no, no,” he shook his head, reassuring you that no one was hurt, “john b’s okay. actually he told me to say hi”

“he-what? why are you here?”

you hated yourself because just looking at him hurt you, knowing that you couldn’t touch him, you couldn’t run into his arms and finally feel safe, it was causing you too much pain.

“do you remember the day we met?”

had he come all the way over there to say that?

“what are you talking about?”

“john b and i spent the whole day on the playground, being stupid and shit, you know the usual,” he smiled and your whole chest ached, “so we got back to the chateau and you were there, playing with your dolls. john b introduced us and then, while he was talking to your dad, you noticed i was hurt. i think i fell or something and my knee was scraped and it burned, but i didn’t say anything, yet you noticed, because…you always did. you told me to sit down and you patched me up, and god you were what? six years old? and you were already taking care of me. you said you always helped your brother when he got hurt so you knew what to do. i was eight, i didn’t even know what love was, i’m not sure i know what it is now either… but i know that i fell in love with you that same day and i haven’t been able to stop since,” he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, “i’m not perfect, i don’t know how to show my feelings, i don’t know what my feelings are most of the time, but i do know that for the last thirteen years whenever i hear someone talk about love, i think of you.”

you didn’t know when the tears had started streaming down your face but at that point they were reaching your neck and you couldn’t stop them. his arms were itching to take you and hold you against his chest, but he knew he had to wait for you, he had waited thirteen years, he could wait a little bit more.

“you came all the way here to tell me that?” you tried to keep your voice steady, but how would anyone be calm after listening to someone pour their whole heart out for them?

“i came here because i miss you. i can’t stop thinking about you, you’re on my mind all day and all night and it hurts, because i know it’s my fault. i could never get over you, i could spend the rest of my life trying to forget you and i know that it’d never work. you’re in everything i do, everything i say, everything is about you, it’s always you. i can’t keep pretending that i’m okay or that i will be, i know i was okay when you were in my arms, when you kissed me, when you let me hold you until you fell asleep. i was okay when i could pretend, even for a night, that you were mine and i was yours. i’m sorry i acted like a jerk, i am; you didn’t deserve that. i should’ve said goodbye to you at the airport, i know, but i couldn’t. it was selfish but the more i thought about it, the more it hurt and i couldn’t watch you leave again. i should’ve begged you to stay, to give us a chance, but i was scared and i’ll regret that for the rest of my life,” he chuckled drily, looking up at the ceiling and then back at you, “i don’t know how i ever thought i would be able to forget about us, about you. i’m nothing without you. you’re in my heart, in my bones, in my soul.”

only in that moment of weakness you let yourself take a real look at him. you didn’t notice the dark eye bags he was wearing when you first opened the door or the way his whole face was different, the light that once adorned his beautiful features was completely gone.

“baby,” your heart clenched at the nickname you had missed so much, “i’m here because this time i’m not letting you go that easily. if you want to scream at me, calling me the worst names possible, if you want to break my heart again and again, by all means do it. i’m ready and i’m not scared, because i’m going to fight for us this time, even if you don’t believe it anymore.”

and after weeks of painful heartaches, you finally saw the man you fell in love with. the one who would do anything for you, that would protect you with everything he has, the man that owns your heart.

“say something, please,” he said, voice breaking, when you still refused to open your mouth and react at his words.

“you know when in movies people say that they can’t live without the person they love? how life is impossible without them?” you asked and he could only nod, confused at what you were trying to say.

“i can live without you, jj,” his heart dropped in his stomach, “i can do everything i used to do when you were in my life. i can still laugh and have fun, i can go out with my new friends and pretend like everything’s okay,” you inhaled shakily, “the thing is: i don’t want to live without you.”

he swore his whole body stopped for a second.

“every single inch of me misses you, jj. i look at you and i miss you. i know my life would go on without you but my heart would ache for you until my last breath, because i was stupid enough to fall in love with you and i know i could never fall out of it.”

at this point you were both crying your eyes out. jj got closer to you as your whole body all but shook at the thought of having him so near to you after weeks of separation.

“you hurt me, j,” you said looking up at him.

“i know. i’m so sorry, that was the last thing i wanted to do,” he whispered, his raspy voice making your stomach flutter.

“i know,” you mumbled as his face was so close to yours you could feel his breath mixing with yours, “you’re an idiot, maybank.”

he chuckled, “that i am.”

you shakily put your hands on his shoulders, then slowly brought them to his neck and finally on the back of his head. he closed his eyes and inhaled sharply at your touch. when you felt his hands on your waist, you smiled up at him and he could hear his heart beating fast at the sight.

“are you gonna let me fight for us?” he asked.

“on one condition.”

his lips turned up into a smile, you and your damn rules.

“whatever you want,” he pressed his forehead to yours and you closed your eyes.

“kiss me.”

and he did. he kissed you until he couldn’t breathe anymore and then he kissed you some more. this time, the room was filled with real words, they weren’t hidden behind your actions anymore as you weren’t scared of the consequences.

“i love you,” he repeated against your skin and your lips like a broken record that you can’t stop listening to.

“i love you,” you replied each time, because you weren’t broken, not anymore. you were both finally whole again.

[sanyu-thewitch05]

Yandere Jock X F! Bookworm reader pt 2

Graduation

Tw: manipulation, degrading language, possessive behavior, bondage, dubcon, spankings, bribery

A/N: Sorry this took a long time. Finals are coming up next week.

Kofi: Wanna buy me a coffee?

🍒🍒🍒🍒🍒🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓

@azoart

Brad, the jock who took your virginity in a library, has surprisingly been a good boyfriend. He cuddles you every night, gives you all the clothes you can want, and gives you attention every day. Though, you practically live at his house now. Luckily, your parents didn't know a thing since they've been overseas since you started dating him.

"Honey, I can't believe we're graduating tomorrow," He coos, spooning you from behind. "Do you have any plans for afterward?"

He hopes you'll say no. The university should've rejected you, especially with all the money he offered them if they did.

"I am going to start getting ready for college. I got accepted into my dream college! Can you believe it?" You cheer, turning towards him with loving eyes.

"Oh, I sure can," Brad replies, barely hiding the discontent in his voice.

You've been dating him for six months. You knew every little cue and behavior when it came to him. You know when he's upset about something.

"Babe, what's wrong?" You ask, placing your hands on his bare chest.

"It's nothing, sweetie. We should probably get dressed. Graduation is in two hours," Brad replies, getting up from the bed.

As much as he is possessive and obsessive, he could never hurt you. He knew how much you looked forward to going to your dream college. Even though it pains him to let you go to college around all those other drunk, handsy, aggressive frat boys.

"Ok, I call the shower first," You say, getting up and walking into the bathroom.

You turn on the shower and look at your products next to his. You are practically his wife now. In fact, you two even share everything. Although, you would like a bit of personal space from time to time. Luckily, the distance between you and Brad should give you that.

"Babe, mind if I join you?" Brad asks, knocking on the bathroom door.

Of course, he can't stay away from you for long in the morning. He always liked his morning cuddles. Though, most of the time, cuddles turn into something more sexual.

"Come on in, Brad. The water always seems a bit warmer when you're near," You say, opening the shower door.

Brad steps into the shower and goes behind you, arms wrapping your waist. He presses your butt against his crotch and keeps the position. You can feel his dick press against your entrance begging to be let in.

"Brad, can you grab the shower head? I wanna wash my hair for graduation," You tease, bending over to show your pussy more.

Brad's dick jumps excitedly, and you can feel his precum dripping onto your sex.

"S-Sure thing, Y/N!" Brad stutters, taking the shower head down and placing it between your legs.

You stand up as a jolt of pleasure goes through your spine. Brad forces you back down and masturbates as you moan.

"That's right, babe. Let me get you off."

"Brad, I'm close!"

Brad switches the pressure settings, and you go over the edge. You release and practically have to have Brad's arms keep you from falling to the floor. Brad holds both sides of your ass and places his face onto your pussy. He laps up your cum and juices, making you twitch again. You see his dick and wrap your legs around his upper body to keep you in place. He stands up, and that's when you take the opportunity to give him an upside-down blowjob. You wrap your soft lips around his tip and lightly kiss and suck it. Brad's legs buckle a bit, then you decide to play dangerously and put his whole dick in his mouth. Your hands play with his balls, stimulating the boy whose semen you wanted oh so much.

Brad makes you cum again, and you moan, his dick still in your mouth. He cums shortly after, his hot cum shooting into your mouth. You let go of his upper body and dick, letting Brad sink to the tub floor.

"You ok, babe? Was my mouth that good?" You ask, giggling as Brad's eyes begin to become unfocused.

"Yes, yes, it was. That was one of your best blowjobs. I guess playing with my balls made the difference," Brad says, using the shower head to clean you. "We should probably wash ourselves so we don't smell like shower sex at graduation."

"I guess you're right," You say, grabbing a shower gel.

~~~~~

Graduation was an exciting moment. Once you have a diploma, you begin to think about your relationship with Brad.

He's a great guy. He treats me well and knows to pleasure me. But it is very unnerving how Brad gets jealous. My pre-calc teacher still won't look into my eyes anymore. Besides, we're both going to college. Maybe we should break up?

"Y/N? Y/N! You were spacing out on me. I asked if you wanted takeout," Brad says as he unlocks his car.

"Um...takeout's fine. Your choice," You respond, getting inside and taking off your graduation cap.

"What's wrong, honeybun? Feeling hangry?" Brad asks, slipping a hand around your ass.

"It's just that we won't be able to see each other often in college-"

"I know, but we can make this relationship work."

"Brad, we should break up."

Brad slams on the brakes, and you hold onto your seatbelt.

"You want to what?"

Brad's face twisted with anger, his face flushing with blood. You've never seen him like this. He drives the car straight to his house and barely avoids the mailbox.

"Get out," Brad says, parking and unlocking his car.

You shakily unbuckle yourself and step out of the car. Brad grabs your arm and pulls you inside.

"Brad, you're hurting me!" You squeal, trying to remove his hand.

"Shut up, slut!" Brad yells,  throwing you on the couch and locking the front door.

Hearing Brad call you a slut pierced your heart. He completely shattered your feelings.

"You're so stupid sometimes. I thought I made it clear that we'll be together forever. There is no breaking up," Brad growls, walking around the living room. "Looks like I have to show you my feelings again. Take your gown off."

"No. I'm not your little sex doll to use whenever you're horny or frustrated. This relationship isn't good for either of us!" You rebuttal, closing the distance between you and Brad. "I love you, Brad. But I can't take the jealousy around everyone in my life anymore. I need distance. We need distance."

"We need intimacy. We need love. You've been pulling away from me as school started to end. We're both adults. Let's talk or work this through."

Brad wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you to his chest.

"I love you, Y/N. Please don't leave me," Brad pleads, hugging you tighter. "You won't slip away from me."

You feel the air slip out of your mouth, and your eyes begin to get tunnel vision. You pass out in Brad's arms.

"I'll love you forever and forever," Brad coos, taking you into his arms.

~~~~~~

When you wake up, you're in front of a table and strapped to a chair. You feel something soft underneath you.

"Brad, where are you?" You groggily ask, lifting your head.

"You're sitting on me, honeybun. I wanted us to be close for dinner. I hope you like the spaghetti and wine!" Brad coos, using his free hand to twirl a fork. "I hope you like the outfit I provided."

You look down and see yourself wearing red lingerie over a see-through robe.

"Now say 'ah'!" Brad commands, putting the fork near your mouth.

You turn your head, but Brad grabs your chin and forces it open. You feel the fork go into your mouth. After nearly choking on the noodles, you cough.

"Brad, I'm sorry. I'm your stupid, attention-seeking, slutty girlfriend! Just please let me go!" You cry, shaking in your restraints.

Brad undoes the restraints, and you fall onto the table when you try to stand up.

"Baby, why would you describe yourself with such vile words?" Brad asks, taking you into his arms.

"That's what I am, right? You said it yourself," You begin to cry as you remember Brad yelling at you.

"Oh baby, what have I done? I didn't mean any of that. I'm the slut. I fucked other girls to get your attention before we started dating. You've done nothing but share the same loyalty I have for you in this relationship," Brad consoles, letting you cry on him. "I promise I'll make this right."

You don't know if it's the lack of oxygen or the dehydration from all the crying, but you ask Brad for the unthinkable.

"Brad, have sex with me," You say, looking at your boyfriend with teary eyes.

"What?"

"Have sex with me. I've always had sex with you because you wanted it. It's time for you to do something for me, for once."

"Y/N, I'd kill for you. You know that, right?"

"I know, and that's part of why I love you and want to break up. You can't focus your entire life around me."

"Honeybun, tonight-no this whole summer, is going to be about you!"

Brad throws you over his shoulder and carries you to his bedroom. He turns on the light and puts you on the covers. You back up until you feel the bedframe. Brad strips till he's naked, and watch Brad crawl towards you like a predator about to pounce on its prey. His eyes are full of love and lust, and there are practically hearts in his eyes.

"You better get ready because I'm going to make all of your body feel loved tonight," Brad flirts, closing the distance and spreading your legs. "Maybe a bit of nostalgic foreplay before the main event?"

Brad's hand goes to your butt and gently rubs it.

"Brad, maybe we should think about this?" You suggest, trying to hold him off as you start to regret what you asked of him.

Brad kisses your neck and cheek.

"Sorry, babe. I'm giving you all of my love tonight," Brad replies, gently turning you onto your stomach. "God, I'm-you're going to enjoy this."

Brad peels off your panties and begins to spank and kiss your ass.

"Brad!" You accidentally moan, putting your face into his cologne-smelling pillow.

"Yes, honey! Feel the pleasure!" Brad moans, spanking your ass harder and faster.

"Ooh, I can't take it anymore!" You whimpered, feeling the pleasure build-up and release.

Brad sticks three fingers in your sex and pulls them out to taste your cum. He sticks his cum covered fingers in his mouth like a hungry animal and practically shivers with pleasure from the taste.

"Brad, I-I think I'm ready," You stammer, nervous about how rough Brad is going to be.

"Don't worry, I won't get rough unless you want me to," Brad reassures, lovingly squeezing your butt.

You flip onto your back and spread your legs for him. Brad positions his hips so it lines up with your vagina. Brad sees how nervous you are and kisses you as a distraction. He manages to put half of his dick inside before you notice.

"Brad!" You squeal, feeling his arms wrap around you. Preparing to begin thrusting.

"It's ok. It's ok. Brad isn't going to hurt you again," Brad coos, kissing down your neck.

You wrap your arms around his upper body and look into his eyes.

"Do it," You say.

Brad kisses you on the lips and puts his whole dick inside you. You both moan from the feeling, and that's when Brad begins to lose himself. Brad's thrusts start to become fast and erratic. However, you feel euphoric and want this moment to last forever.

"Oh fuck, baby! Keep going!" You encourage, moving your hands down to Brad's ass. You spank and grope his ass. "Keep going! Keep going!"

"I'm going to fill you up with my love! All of it!" Brad moans, starting to drool like a dog. "OH SHIT! I'm cumming! Fuck!"

Brad cums in you while thrusting and eventually slows to a stop to orgasm. He cums inside you two more times and crashes on top of your body.

"Brad, that was wonderful," You compliment, stroking Brad's hair.

Brad kisses your boobs and lets one hand playfully rub a nipple.

"I'm glad I made you happy," Brad says, kissing your forehead. "And don't you worry your little head about getting pregnant. I bought multiple packs of the morning-after pill. I remember how worried you were about getting pregnant after your first time in the library."

"Great, hand me one," You say, lovingly looking into Brad's green eyes.

"Sweetie, that's for in the morning. In case you haven't noticed, I haven't pulled out of you yet. I'm not going to let any of my love go to waste, even if it's a wet dream."

"Brad, I love you," You say.

You feel Brad's dick harden inside you after you say the words.

"I love you too, honeybun!" Brad exclaims, excitedly kissing you on the lips.

[quinnylouhughesx43]

ɪᴛ’ꜱ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏꜱ ᴀ ʀɪꜱᴋ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴡᴀʀᴅ - ɴɪᴄᴏ ʜɪꜱᴄʜɪᴇʀ ❤︎︎

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: Nico is playing in IIHF Men’s World Championship and takes a nasty cut to the face. You are apart of the medical training staff for the Swiss Hockey team and end up treating Nico. But not before you nearly pass out from seeing him with all the blood.

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: second person pov, discussion of injury, heavily unedited, probably has terrible grammar, I wrote this while really really sick and it sucks im sorry ill fix it when im better

ʀᴇQᴜᴇꜱᴛ: ʏᴇꜱ/ɴᴏ

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀꜱ ɴᴏᴛᴇ: Below the cut there is a picture of Nico from when he first got cut and there is visible blood. If you cannot handle seeing blood for whatever reason. I advise to skip right by the top section of the post below the cut.

Watching Nico glide up and down the ice with the puck at his stick or him being ready to receive the puck from a pass is one of the best things to watch. He is the happiest when he’s on the ice. It is even better when he scores or gets the assist. His passion for the game is immeasurable, just the same as his love and care for his teammates, friends, and family.

You first met Nico two years ago when you first started working with the New Jersey Devils as apart of their medical training staff. Having worked in the realm of sports while in school and being surrounded by athletes it was very easy to connect with the team. Quickly connecting with quite a few of the players it was only a matter of time before friendships developed, some closer than others. Nico happened to become your best friend in the program. The two of you entirely inseparable.

When Nico found out he would be playing for the Swiss National Hockey team for the Men’s World Championship, he did some work and got you on as a trainer. He didn’t want to travel Czechia and leave you back in the states. “Neeks, you really didn’t have to do that, I could go work at the college for the summer and be okay.” Nico shook his head and tsked. “Nope. You’re coming with me. Who else is going to tape my wrists just right?” He was scraping the bucket for an excuse. Nico didn’t even tape his wrists. Rolling your eyes you didn’t argue you back. You just nodded and accepted his decision.

ミ★☆彡

“Nico? How are you feeling about today?” You ask sitting on the edge of the bed while he’s pulling his shirt over his head. You have no lie to tell, you’re a little upset he has covered his toned upper body. “It’s just another game sweets. Nothing to be concerned with.” Nico answers as if he is still playing peewee hockey. “I don’t know neeks, I watched highlights from their last game, they play pretty rough.” You retort twisting your hands. Showing your anxiety.

Nico turned around from where he had been looking at you in the mirror to face you directly. “It will be okay. I promise you.” He walked up to you, grabbing ahold of your face softly. He was hoping to calm your nerves. Since arriving in Czechia your friendship had become more hands on, flirtatious, and a tad possessive. “If i felt an ounce of worry about this game, you would be the first to know. My little trainer.” He assures you and places a kiss on your forehead. “Let’s get going, shall we? You’ve got got ankles to tape and I’ve got ankles to break” Nico grins and holds his hand out for you.

You laugh a little at Nico’s attempt at a sports joke and follow him out the door holding on to his hand.

ミ★☆彡

It was deep into the second period when Nico and a defender clashed on the ice.

As an athletic trainer you’re supposed to be able to take on anything that’s thrown at you. But they don’t prepare you for when your best friend is down on the ice bleeding profusely. They don’t prepare you for when your mind reverts to all the other hockey players who had injuries from skates in the facial and neck region and just how badly they turned out.

It wasn’t until the entire bench of Swiss players are screaming your name that you realize Nico is off the ice and heading down the tunnel.

Reaching for your kit and quickly following after the officials that are escorting Nico down the tunnel to catch back up to them so the Slovakian team trainers are not the ones treating him. “I..I got it from here.” You tell the officials. They nod and head back the other way.

“Is it your face? Is it your neck?” You begin to ask him, but that entices him to move the towel. “OH! No you don’t. Keep that there until I have my stuff ready.” “It’s my cheek” he gruffed out.

It is like a million tons just came off your chest with just those few words. The feeling that your heart may stop at any moment has fled. A cut to the cheek, that’s an easy feat. A cut to the throat not so easy. Upon reaching the medical room, you sit him down on the first treatment table available and immediately get to work.

“You scared me neeks.” Taking a moment while getting his cut disinfected and ready for the sutures you tried to tell him but it only came out barely above a whisper. “I know, you didn’t move. You always move. You’re always out there with in seconds. That’s when I knew it was bad.” He gave an awkward chuckle and reached up to touch your forearm. “But it’s okay sweets. Sometimes we get scared. Like right now I’m scared because, this is going to hurt isn’t it?” He asked honestly giving his staple smirk that your swear he learned from Jack . “Well it isn’t going to feel good Neeks, but if you’re good I’ll give you a reward.” You say returning his a smirk.

“Hey Nico, why do you always play so hard?” You ask finishing up his last stitch. “It’s always a risk, but think about the reward i get after.” “A reward? You don’t always get a reward.”

“Oh yeah i do. I play as hard as i do because if im sore i can convince my trainer best friend to treat me. Which means i have her all to myself for just a few moment, I have happy teammates, happy fans.” He flashes a smile before licking his lips and then biting his lower lips. “And if I’m really lucky, one day my reward will be getting my best friend as my girlfriend. I’ve been dropping not so subtle hints this trip but I’m not so sure they’re working.” He’s standing now at the edge of the treatment table, he’s taken ahold of the waist holding you close to him. “Is that a possibility?” He asks dropping his forehead to touch yours. “I think if you asked her she’d say yes.” You blurt out so fast it’s almost embarrassing.

“Sweets, would you reward me by being my girlfriend?” Nico asks never breaking eye contact, his ton of voice so sincere.

“Yes, Neeks.”

ミ★☆彡

I’m sorry this is very rough, very unedited. I’ve been so sick this week. I’m hoping soon I can rework it and make it much better. Writing for Nico has proven to be extremely hard for me. 😩

[spacecowboyhotch]

Apple Pie

summary: you and hotch spend the first of many christmases together.

pairing: fem!reader x college!aaron hotchner

contents: explicit language, best friends to lovers, mention of a deceased parent, internal angst/sadness, food mention, fluff, kissing

wc: 1,756

A/N: me writing a hotch fic? more likely than you think! merry christmas to my hotchgirls (and everyone else of course) who celebrates ❤️

cm masterlist

He doesn’t understand why he misses it. There was never anything special about his home on Christmas. No expected pile of presents under the tiny tree that was always falling apart– is probably falling apart in his mother’s living room right now. No extended family gathering together around a table. No Sunday mass, or other family tradition.

His father was never there and for that he was grateful. The haul was always modest, a few present for him, a few for Sean. Sometimes there would be a can of cinnamon rolls popped open, filling the house with spiced warmth, eaten with chocolate milk. Other times he would just scavenge, always making sure to share whatever he found with Sean. Oatmeal or some cereal with raisins in it, sprinkled with sugar.

It was never much but it was home. It was Hotchner Christmas.

He makes the decision early to not go home. There’s nothing there for him— Sean is in juvie, his mom is working herself to the bone to keep up with bills. His father is dead. So he stays on campus.

And for once in his life, Aaron feels lucky because you stay in town too.

“Why aren’t you going home again?” He asks a couple days before the break starts. The two of you are sitting on the couch in your apartment after dinner, one of the classic Christmas claymations playing on the tv.

You shrug, taking a sip from the warm mug of hot chocolate in your hands, “Christmas is their anniversary, they’re taking a trip and we’ll do all the family stuff when they get back.”

He hums in response, turning his eyes back to the screen though his mind drifts elsewhere.

Aaron can’t think about how different your experiences with the holiday are. How much love filled your home when the season rolled around. Jealousy would bubble up inside of him if he didn’t care for you so much. You’ve become the most important person on the planet to him in the short time that you’ve known one another and he only wishes good things for you.

As if you can hear his thoughts you lean your head on his shoulder and ask, “What’s Christmas like at your house?”

“Even when my father was alive he wouldn’t be there…he was off…doesn’t matter. My mom tried. She did the best that she could with what we had, what my father gave her,” His voice is somber, and you can’t tell if its because he misses it or never wants it to happen again.

Regardless you nod, deciding to leave any of the other questions that popped up in your head from that description alone to fade away. Aaron always has this melancholy that surrounds him and you’d never want to contribute to it. In fact, you do everything you can to always make him smile, an expression that is almost reserved just for you.

“Since we’re both staying here, what do you think about me coming over for Christmas?”

“What could we possibly do in my miniscule dorm room for Christmas?”

“Alright, then you come over to mine,” You suggest easily.

—

He’s standing in the parking lot of your apartment building near his car like a nervous idiot and he’s not quite sure why. That’s not entirely true, any time he’s alone with you he’s nervous because you’re…well you’re you. Bright and sweet, always reminding him that there are things and people worth enduring this life for. But, this is different– you don’t share Christmas with anyone, especially not you. With how you’ve talked about your Christmas traditions, this is a big deal.

You’re sharing a piece of your home with him, something he’d never do because his home for as long as he can remember has been broken.

When you open the door, you’re in Christmas in pajamas, green with a Christmas lights pattern all over it just like the tree. He couldn’t keep a straight face if he tried, not with the way your eyes light up when they drop to the plain green sweater he has on.

“You’re here and you’re festive!”

He looks down at the sweater skeptically, “I tried.”

“It’s perfect,” You insist, pulling him inside.

Your apartment is cozy— all the main lights are off because you’ve covered the space in soft white Christmas lights. There’s Christmas music playing low in the background, a tree much too large for the space nestled in the corner of the living room. There are trinkets and knick knacks everywhere. Christmas has effectively exploded in your apartment.

He raises an eyebrow at you as he sheds his coat, “You’ve gone all out I see.”

“It’s your first Christmas away from home, it should be special.”

“Trust me, I didn’t expect all of this,” He gestures around loosely.

“Well, its the first Christmas that we’ve ever spent together. So it’s extra special. C’mon.”

You grab his hand leading him into the kitchen and his heart jumps in his chest. The warmth of your hand is gone quickly as you reach for two martini glasses rimmed with sugar and filled with a deep burgundy liquid. That smile is still on your face as you hold them up near your cheeks, looking proud of yourself.

“What’s this?”

“A cranberry spritz.” You hold it out to him and when he eyes it cautiously you add, “Non-alcoholic just how you like. I also have eggnog if you’d prefer it.”

That furrow between his eyebrows smooths out, a small smile on his lips as he takes it, “This is good, thanks.”

Your returning smile is bright as always as you gesture to the stool at the island, “Sit, dinner’s almost ready.”

Dinner is intricate by his standards; a roast chicken with a sauce that’s light and garlicky, mashed potatoes, and a mixed vegetable dish that he could easily eat every day for the rest of life. Ignoring his protests and grumbles, you plate dinner not only for yourself and him, turning on The Grinch before sliding into the island stool next to him.

“Didn’t know you could cook this well, you’ve been feeding us grilled cheeses all semester.”

“Cooking like this is expensive, Aaron,” You remind him teasingly.

“I know, I appreciate it— really, you didn’t have to do all of this.”

“Should we take a shot of eggnog every time you say something like that tonight?”

He gives you a scolding look that makes you giggle. You stand, bumping his shoulder playfully and he tries to join you, reaching for his plate but you quickly snatch it, hand coming down on his shoulder.

“Stay put, I’ll take that. There’s dessert too.”

“Dessert?”

“You expected Christmas dinner without dessert? What’s next, you don’t think I got you anything?”

“I knew you’d be stubborn and not listen so I didn’t waste my breath.”

“Good,” You say with a smile on your face, happy that he’ll accept the gifts you got him, but also because it feels good to be known by him.

With your hands tucked safely into bright red oven mitts, you retrieve the apple pie from the oven, steam escaping from the intricate design you carved into the crust.

Aaron blinks, something soft stirring deep in his chest, “Apple pie.”

“It’s your favorite,” You simply, not noticing the way his voice changes as you continue to examine the pie.

“You know you didn’t have to do all this for me.”

“We’re at two shots of eggnog now. Who said I did it just for you?” You tease softly, before turning towards him, your expression growing serious. “You deserve it, Aaron. Thorough holidays, your favorite dessert, every reason to smile. You deserve it all.”

That feeling that’s been sitting in his chest, bubbling softly turns into a rolling boil, one he can no longer ignore. He reaches for your hand and pulls you close, a soft sound of surprise leaving you as he presses his lips to yours. You melt immediately, clutching at his shoulders as he licks into your mouth. While the kiss is overall gentle, there’s an undercurrent of hunger that’s obvious in the strength of his grip and insistence of his tongue. I’m the desperate whimper that slips from his throat and echoes into yours. He breaks the kiss eventually, resting his forehead against your own as your breaths mingle.

“The mistletoe is actually over there,” You whisper against his lips stupidly.

He looks at you with disbelief, mouth agape before determination materializes in his eyes. Moving you both to the mistletoe, he kisses you again, this time it’s softer and less heated.

“Better?”

“Honestly, I think I liked the one over there a—“

He cuts you off with another kiss, cupping your face in his hands. He kisses you. Kisses you and kisses you and kisses you, like it’s his job. Like it’s his dying wish and the grim reaper has come for you.

“As much as I love losing air in the name of sucking face, the pie’s gonna get cold and I made it just for you,” You mumble, running your hands up and down his chest.

“Don’t call it sucking face,” He grumbles, cheeks going pink as he lets you go.

You move towards your baked masterpiece, inhaling its sweet, cinnamon-y scent. “Snogging?”

He gives you an exasperated look, but you can see the way his lips twitch, the fondness in his gaze as he moves towards you.

“Kiss-a-rama? Lip Olympics? Lip-lock-a-doodle?” You muse, cutting a piece of pie for him and sliding him the plate.

“You’re unbelievable.”

“And all yours,” You murmur with a smug smile, cutting a piece of pie for yourself.

Aaron’s flush deepens as he takes his place at the counter again. When you join him, he pulls your stool closer to his, wrapping his arm around you as the two of you eat and talk and kiss. The warm domesticity and soft excitement in the air has him feeling like this could be home. You could be home. A tradition he could look forward to.

Further into the night, the two of you are curled up on your couch as always— yet another Christmas movie playing— instead this time you’re firmly planted in Aaron’s lap with his arms wrapped tightly around you.

“Aaron?”

“Hmm?” He hums, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“Let’s spend every Christmas together,” You suggest, as if you’d been reading his mind earlier.

He grins, raising his hand to your chin to pull you into a gentle kiss. “Yeah, let’s.”

cm taglist: @ssamorganhotchner, @hotchsdoormat, @lefthandedhotch, @heliotropehotch, @zetasaturno99, @ssa-montgomery, @moonshine-evelyn, @emlynblack, @wheelsupkels, @jaspxr, @gspenc, @sadgirlml, @hotchs-bitch, @wilbur-rabbit, @hotched, @greg-montgomery, @reidselle, @fightingdragonswithwho , @rousethemouse, @eternal-silvertongued-prince, @lesbianhotch

[radkindoffeminist]

I am 13 years old. I have boobs bigger than any other girl in my year and I stopped growing in height a year ago. People tell me I could pass for 16-18 easily. Girls ask what size I am. Boys mock me for having tits. Men hit on me. Most people think I am a lot older than I actually am. I am confused by everything.

I am 14 years old. I begin turning to online chatrooms and camsex for attention because I am so lonely and horny. I don't speak about them to anyone in my life because it's never spoken about. Women and girls don't have sexual desires. I start speaking to a guy, Glenn. He's 28-years-old and knows how old I am. I speak to him for years and he's the first guy I camsex with. He speaks to me like a person and not a child and I love him for that. One day, he doesn't respond and I never hear from him again, but spend weeks hoping that I will see another message from him (he had a habit of disappearing for weeks only to come back). He doesn't message again. My heart is broken.

I am 15 years old, just about. I continue using these online chatrooms because I am such a lonely teenager and need some sort of attention and this is the only place I can find it. I meet a guy, David, who I ask to be my boyfriend. He was 21 years old. We speak every day for a month and have camsex all the time. He is sweet and mature and has his own car! Our plans to meet fall through and then he suddenly stops talking to me one day. Two months after that day, he messaged me again. His grandmother died so he couldn't deal with life. I feel empathic towards him but feel forced to take him back. When I realise that he won't take responsibility for the fact that cutting me off for months hurt me because he says that he was hurt, I break up with him. He insists on staying friends. I agree because I still feel bad for him.

I am 16 years old. I start college and I'm still speaking to my ex David, but then I see how possessive he is of me. He wants to meet up with me but will only do so on his terms, when he can kiss me all he wants because he still sees me as his. I try and speak to him about the guys at my college and he gets jealous. I stop speaking to him. I begin to realise just how toxic him and these chatrooms and camsex all is. I make a vow to stop it for my mental health, but it is hard to stop something when what draws you there is the fact that you're incredibly lonely.

I am 17 years old. It has been three years since I first opened a chatroom and had camsex and I actively try to stop. I have spoken to dozens, if not hundreds, of men by this point and they are all the same: they want to use me and will put on a little play to ensure they can get me. Some are just nice and upfront with me, using me and then never speaking to me again. Some put on a show, pretending that they like/love me so I become wrapped around their finger. Some are kind and caring, but then threaten me when they realise that they won't get what they want. Too many of them are angry when they hear the word no and if they aren't straight up agressive towards me, then they're making me feel guilty for having boundaries or trying to convince me to break them because they're different from the rest. I've met dozens of men who've claimed that they're different from the rest but they never are. They're all the same. After so many times of promising myself to stop, what really gets me to stop was someone threatening to share naked photos of me he'd taken while we were on a video call on my Facebook. I block him. I realise just how manipulated I'd been over the years and come to accept the fact that most, if not all, of these men had taken photos without my permission and some probably still have them saved somewhere.

I am 18 years old. I have managed to mostly stay away from the chatrooms and camsex, but I ended up speaking to one more guy. He seems so lovely and kind and caring. He is 26-years-old. We live far apart but he promises that he'll come and visit me sometime, even though he dodges the question every time I ask and never seems to be around or available when I'm available. We talked on and off for months. One day I tell him that I've decided to completely give up on camsex. It is too toxic and traumatic for me. I never want to do it again. He stops talking to me. I slowly realised how he was just nice to me because he wanted camsex and nudes. He never loved me but I loved him.

I am 19 years old. I start dating my ex-boyfriend. He is a genuinely wonderful and kind person. He does not disrespect my boundaries regarding camsex and nudes. He used to do a similar thing and understands how toxic and horrible these spaces can be. He's a good person, other than the fact that he mocks my interest in feminism and occasionally breaks some boundaries. We stay together for a year before we end up drifting apart.

I am 20 years old. I have severe depression. For the first time in my life, while I am incredibly drunk, I talk about my ex David and all the camsex stuff. I feel a weight lift off my shoulders knowing that other people agree that I was groomed. I had convinced myself for years that I was not groomed because I asked him out so everything that happened to me was my own fault. But I realise that while I was a stupid teenager, it still wasn't right for men to take advantage of me. I learn to accept that camsex and nudes will always be a point of trauma for me and something that I can never do again. I am so proud of myself for not doing it for two years.

I am 21 years old. I am the same age my ex David was when I dated him. I look at the freshers at my university and I couldn't imagine dating someone who is just out of college (high school). I had realised some years earlier that my relationship was toxic and pedophilic but it took me getting to the same age he was to realise just how horrible it was. I wish I could warn so many other women but I know I have to live with it because I was that teenage girl who dated that older man so I know that every single one thinks that they're the exception to the rule. They think that there's no way they're getting groomed by and older man because they really are that mature. I wish I could tell them but they'll just run into their groomer's arms even more.

I am 22 years old. I am off anti-depressants and glad that my sex drive is back. I decide that now, post COVID, would be the perfect time to have some fun. I sleep around, but the sex is so unsatifying for me most of the time. The women are good but the men spent five minutes inside of me and are then done. Half of them don't do anything to make me cum and never ask if I have. One of them complains that I take ages to cum after spending two minutes rubbing me off (badly). After feeling guilty for cancelling something last minute, I end up hooking up with someone who I shouldn't have. I cannot remember the last time I felt so repulsed by someone's touch. I stop hooking up with people. For the first time in years, I broke my no nudes, no camsex rule. I feel awful about myself.

I am 23 years old. I realise that my hooking-up with people phase was just a copy of my camsex stage. I realise that the men I hooked up with used the exact same tactics as the men I had camsex with: seemed like nice people so they could use me; got angry at me when I said no to them because they felt entitled to whatever they wanted for being nice to me; and thought that they could drop me for weeks at a time because I will always come running back to them. Sometimes I feel so assured in myself because I have spent years learning about all the maipulation tactics that they all use and because I can say no to them when they try to guilt me; sometimes I feel like that same 14 year old girl who ignored every red flag that she ever saw because she was so deperate for love and attention from anyone.

I am 24 years old. I am 2 years younger than my ex Sam was when I dated him and 4 years younger than Glenn was when I started talking to him. I look at the 18-20 year olds in our office and they are basically children to me. If I feel this way now, how much creepier will it feel when I actually hit 26 or 28? I tell people I have no interest in men and for the first time in my life I truly mean it. I stopped dating them years ago but all interest in them is gone now. Sometimes people tell me that I just haven't met the right man yet. I shrug it off but I want to scream at them. I have met dozens of men who have told me that they're different to the rest but they are all the same in the end. The right man doesn't exist.

[hanbinstar]

hihi can I be 🐰 anon anyways can I request asking zb1 for cuddles

Of course 🥰 tbh I am so happy to be getting requests I usually don’t do full group because its more time and I have school but im gonna try to do this as much as I can, rn i have had a lot of testing so I might be late sorry

Jiwoong - Jiwoong is so fine omg he would probably come up to you while you’re doing homework (let’s pretend we are in college) and would wrap his arms around you and lightly kiss your neck (in a cute sweet way) “baby please, you look stressed how about you take a break with me” he would then proceed to cuddle up with you on the couch and watch your favorite movies

Matthew - i feel like Matthew would probably not even need to ask, he’d just start back hugging you or if you are on the couch he would hold you in his arms and give so many forehead kisses

Zhanghao - he would definitely pout or whine until you ask him what’s wrong “these days you’ve been so busy and i know we live together but i need your attention desperately” you would give in and hug this man

Taerae - he’d probably not even ask he’d just take you to the couch and lay his head in your lap so you could cuddle him and play with his hair

Hanbin - he would probably be very careful at first when asking because he wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable despite you being his partner so when he did ask he felt so relieved when you said yes, ever since then he has been a complete cuddle bug

Gyuvin - he probably jokingly pulled you onto his lap and you didn’t say no so he took it as a sign that you were cool with it, he’s really tall so when y’all cuddle in bed he sometimes wraps his arms and legs around you “haha youre trapped”

Ricky - Ricky Is a confident man who probably wouldn’t even hesitate when asking you “YN come here let’s cuddle” he’s very gentle with you and he probably plays with your hair while your face is buried in his chest

Gunwook - hed be smiling so hard and keep checking if you were alive “Gunwook I already told you,Im asleep I’m not dead, a dead person would not be snoring as loud as I do”

Yujin - he would probably be so shy, omg imagine him coming home from futball (soccer) and he just asks you for cuddles as a reward for him winning, he would try to be confident and chill but his heart would beating so fast and when you fall asleep on him he would probably try so hard not to move (the thing you do when your cat is ontop if you asleep so you make sure to stay as still as possible) he would eventually fall asleep as well

[heartsofminds]

Blooming (II)

So instead he settles for an affectionate squeeze to the right side of her face with his palm. “I wish you weren’t so young.” or Bradley Bradshaw is emotionally immature and he knows it, but she just wants to kiss him. 

Warning: Contains curse words, a failed age-gapped relationship, and sexual connotations. 18+ readers, only. 

A/N: Welcome to part two of my new series, Blooming. Here we learn about Rooster and Hangman’s past and his lack of emotional stability. Stay awhile, and enjoy 9.1k words in honor of our favorite aviator’s birthday.

Read Blooming and Blooming III here. 

i. 

Bradley knows he has a temper. 

One that makes his face hot and his chest flush a deep pink. His ears are always scarlet and the vein in the side of his neck attempts to become four-dimensional. The voices of everyone around him become muffled and he breathes deeply through his nose. His view of his immediate surroundings becomes blurred; almost as if he’s underwater and opening his eyes without goggles. 

And although Bradley knows he has a horrible temper, he also knows that he desperately needs to work on keeping it in check. It’s been a long time since he’s blown up. It’s been an even longer time since he’s felt so angry that he couldn’t breathe; his lungs feeling crushed and like he’s up in the air with no oxygen. 

He doesn’t know who he inherited his short fuse from. His mother was the most patient and kindhearted woman on Earth and his father, from what he had been told, was an oddball who was so obnoxiously goofy that nothing would ever be taken seriously enough by him to set him off in such a volatile way. 

And then there was Bradley. 

Bradley Bradshaw, who already had a chip on his shoulder from his father’s reputation, his mother’s death, and the fact that his beloved godfather didn’t believe in him enough to hold his own that he pulled his papers from the Academy the first time he applied and refused to acknowledge why Bradley was so pissed at what he had done.  

So that’s how he found himself in a class with people younger than him, literal infants in his humble opinion, and was embarrassed knowing that he stuck out the minute someone asked him how old he is. 

He made friends there, of course. He even had himself something sort of a girlfriend too. Her name was Tanner, and she was a knockout; tan skin and curly red hair with freckles that dotted her skin like how craters kiss the moon. But she was only nineteen and here he was at twenty-four; hopelessly in love with her and treading in the dangerous waters of knowing that their relationship was going to inevitably end. Mostly because they lived in such different worlds. 

Venus always looks close to Mercury until you realize that they orbit at different speeds. 

And despite it all, he was ready to bite the bullet for her. He was ready to settle down the minute she said: “Go.” He was ready to do any and everything she wanted if she just as much as felt the need to ask him. She was his everything because he had nothing and he knew it was a dangerous game to be playing; putting all that trust and responsibility in a person, let alone a nineteen-year-old girl. But Bradley pushed this fear aside and realized that this was his new normal. With his mom dead and Maverick out of the picture, she was the sole proprietor of his grounding and he assumed that he would be her’s as well. 

Bradley knew that he liked being comfortable and because he loved this girl so much, he was willing to swim in a sea of unknowns and discomfort. It was uncharted territory but it couldn’t be so bad. And boy, how that came back to bite him in the ass. 

While he did trust her fully (well, three-quarters of the way if you were to be exact), Rooster knew that they probably were not on the same page. Reading the same book? Yes. On the same page? Maybe sometimes, but definitely not reading the same paragraph and he’s for certain they’re not comprehending any of the words the same way.  

He knew she was young and still in college, a breeding ground for meaningless hookups and boozy frat parties, but he never wanted to be too controlling. He had seen enough of that bullshit in his fellow midshipmen. He had witnessed the kicking of walls when their significant others pissed them off or even the disgusting “locker room talk” that he assumed all guys grew out of after they graduated high school. But with each “Her tits are huge!” and “God damn I’d do anything to fuck her!”’s he hears when getting dressed after an intense training session, he realizes that a lot of the people he’s around are still boys and teenaged ones, at that. 

And then the realization clicks again that man, sometimes it fucking sucks being so old. 

But despite it all, Bradley knew that he wasn’t in control of her and couldn’t make himself have the heart to if he tried. So he didn’t loom over her the way that he would’ve liked to sometimes and understandably, he did get rather jealous every now and then. And he was working on being more open and communicating what he’s feeling when he’s feeling it or whatever his friend Phoenix was always on about when he came to her with relationship troubles. 

While Phoenix’s advice did work and he had admitted to himself that the female pilot is more emotionally intelligent and sensitive than she ever let on, the fights and disagreements still happened despite him using her tactics. Sometimes he would find himself shouting hurtful things at her or refusing to speak whenever she was attempting to rile him up so he would yell at Tanner. She had told him once during a late night pillow talking session that she picked fights with him so she would have some reason to actually be mad at him. 

But whenever he felt his cheeks get hot and his ears turn red while arguing with her about spending too much time with one of her male friends (for what feels like the eightieth time in the nine months they had been dating), Rooster remembered that he was yelling at a nineteen-year-old girl, with turquoise bedsheets and fairy lights all around him in a shitty dorm room with a nosy roommate on the other side of the door.  

So while Bradley does have a temper, he learned rather quickly when to pick his battles. He took deep breaths in through his nose and out through his mouth. He clenched his fists at his sides and closed his eyes. His thumb rubbed circular motions over his pointer fingers and he would picture his mom’s face, bleach blonde hair, and ocean blue eyes giving him a soft smile and saying, “You’re alright! Just calm down, babycakes.” 

When he would get like that he would always think of what his mom would do and he knew that his mother was the kindest woman in history and that she raised him well. He would always see women as an extension of themselves and not an extension of him. 

Girls have their own brains and own consciousnesses and own sets of morals. Bradley recognized that keeping his unwarranted thoughts to himself was easier than letting them out and causing an F6 tornado of problems that were just a poor projection of his own unhealed trauma and insecurities.

And while this along with Phoenix’s pep talks helped him be the best man and boyfriend he thought he could manage to be at the ripe age of twenty-four, Rooster realized that he had some shortcomings and that he kept failing to realize one thing: That not every girl he’s with is meant to be his. 

One thing that routinely had Rooster seeing red regardless of how much self-soothing or how much he tried to focus on his mother’s voice in the back of his head is whenever Tanner would visit him on base. 

Jake Seresin was not shy in the slightest and Bradley was (and still definitely is) convinced that God put him on this Earth to see if he had a hidden brain aneurysm because he’s sure one will erupt from how much stress the blond regularly puts him through. And yeah, Hangman’s annoying, and yes, Rooster is definitely not one of his biggest fans, but his girlfriend’s wandering eyes on the younger pilot wasn’t Jake’s fault in the slightest. But since he can’t force himself to be angry with Tanner, he settled for directing his anger towards Hangman and God, did that make his blood boil.

He had already brought it up to her numerous times before; telling her that he wasn’t trying to be a dick or prove that he was an Alpha male. Just that the idea that she always seemed more intrigued in what Jake had to say or was doing whenever she comes around bothers him like no other. Of course, that started a screaming match with her face as red as a tomato and his breathing resembling that of a woman experiencing contractions, but he had thought they worked it out. 

Well, shit, the make-up sex they had after was enough of an agreement, he had thought, but obviously not because it was happened again and this time, it was enough to make Bradley lose it entirely. 

Bradley knew that their relationship was probably coming to a close soon. He had a sixth sense for these kinds of things and he didn’t know if his intuition was really strong or if he just had a propensity to worry himself to death, but he felt like he could always tell when people’s feelings about him had shifted. 

Well that, and it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that Tanner was losing interest. She didn’t remember the small things he had told her in passing like she used to and she never divulged much into her daily life with him over the phone anymore. She always sounded tired. Bored, even, and he couldn’t tell if she was bored of the conversation or bored of him. 

He chose to ignore it. He chose to ignore the sounds of unfamiliar voices in the back of their phone calls. He chose to ignore the fake interest she had while giving him the little reactions people usually have when you’re talking to them. He had caught her a few times laughing at morbid things he would say, which proved his theory that she was hearing him but never really listening. He chose to ignore the fact that she never told him she missed him anymore or that all the letters she would send would be signed with her name neatly at the bottom. 

She clearly had surpassed the need to declare her love for him with a comma following her signature on a piece of stationery paper.

Bradley chose to ignore all of this because living in denial is always better than having the burden of proof thrown in your face for you to forcefully accept it. 

So as a last-ditch effort to mend the relationship before biting the bullet and calling it quits with her, he invited her to the base to visit him. He made a deal with himself; if it went well, he would leave it alone but if she seemed like she’d rather be strangled with barbed wire than be there with him, he would let her go. 

When Tanner arrived, it was all butterflies and rainbows. She engulfed him in a hug and kissed his face like crazy. He didn’t remember her being such a fan of lipgloss when he had seen her two months prior, but he figures a lot can change about someone when you very rarely see them. So when she laid sticky cherry flavored kisses on his cheeks and neck, he didn’t question her on it and relished in the fact that she was there with him and that maybe, quite possibly, she was still in love and that this was it for him. 

She’s eager to hold his hand and to listen to his stories about whatever bullshit he has going on at the moment. She even gives him a rundown of her current friend group at college and what drama is brewing between whichever group of people and how she found out about it and what she intends to do to prevent things from getting so insanely messy. 

She’s basically glued to his hip the entire weekend. Her hand is always twisting their fingers together and the band of her purity ring (which has definitely been rendered useless since she’s been dating Bradley) rubs against the junction between Bradley’s thumb and pointer finger and fits like a cog in a wheel; as if it had always belonged there. She smiles sweetly at him, and he has her full attention whenever he speaks or walks into a room. 

When Tanner asks to use the bathroom and insists that she can find it herself without his help, Bradley doesn't think anything of it. She’s a big girl and as much as he wanted to go with her so he could soak up every second of the limited time they had together, he had to be laissez-faire. He couldn’t control her and he knew that lurking around every corner would make her feel like a child. 

So Bradley settled on passing the time by sitting down and relaxing. He leaned forward slightly, his elbows rested on his knees and his legs were spread enough to be proportionate with his torso. He tapped his feet, drummed his fingers on his legs, and fiddled with his watch. He knew that she was a slow walker with zero sense of urgency to her. There were some exceptions to that; those only being if she was running late for class and she had an exam that specific period or if she was horny beyond belief and was begging him to “fuck the shit” out of her on a shitty ass college dorm mattress. 

It didn’t seem weird that fifteen minutes had passed and there was still no sign of her. As a means to prevent himself from worrying to death or pacing around the base like a fucking lunatic, Bradley decided to busy his mind by going over his ever-growing “to-do” list that he kept in the back of his head. 

Despite all the mundane tasks and intrusive and borderline obnoxious thoughts he had going a mile a minute in his brain, Bradley was surprisingly an organized thinker when it came to remembering all the things that he had to do. He carefully sifted through his responsibilities and assigned them blocks of time and where they would fit in his day before he checked his watch again and realized that an entire forty minutes had passed since he had last seen his girlfriend. 

Something was off, and the familiar impending pit of doom that often plagued his stomach made a reappearance as he sped walked up and down the hallways of the base. 

She’s fine, right? The base is huge and she’s terrible with directions so she may have just gotten lost, right? And figured that he would come looking for her, right? She’s fine. She had to be. 

And when Bradley rounded a corner and was met with a supply closet at a dead end, he paused at a loud thump that followed a high-pitched moan. 

“Oh God!” he heard a breathy squeak from a female voice, “Harder, daddy. Please, I’ve been so good!” 

The pit in Rooster’s stomach turned into a ball of fire. He recognized that wheezy gasp anywhere. Hell, he had heard it two nights ago when he had her face down in the backseat of her 2002 Ford Focus. 

He should be the only person eliciting those kinds of sounds from her. He had a death wish for whoever was on the other side of that metal door, because one thing about Bradley Bradshaw was that you never messed with anything that was his. 

Rooster kicked open the door with his fists clenched to his side. He knew his ears were bright red and he felt himself starting to sweat bullets through his uniform shirt. The anger was hot as hell, and if he was in a better mood, he would make the joke that hell was right in front of him.  

Her blouse was unbuttoned and it's been shifted over to one side of her chest, her nipple poking out through the gaped hole the button was supposed to secure. Her bra had long been taken off of her and the denim shorts she had worn to the base are hanging off of a random filing cabinet that was stored in there; showing that they were taken off in a frenzy. 

And low and behold, the man of his disdain (even more so now than ever before) was in front of her, hoisting her up around his waist and fucking into her relentlessly. His uniform top was unbuttoned and his slacks were limp around his hips. 

The sudden kick of the door opening did little to interrupt them, but Jake noticed Bradley standing in front of them; a damn near homicidal gleam in his eye and his entire body flushed pink with red hot anger. And like the asshole that Hangman is, he sent him a smirk and a wink before leaning forward to suck a hickey behind the redhead's ear. 

“You son of a bitch!” Bradley screeched, “I’ll fucking kill you!” 

He barreled his way into the small and rather dingy supply closet. Bradley grabbed Jake by the collar of his shirt and pushed him into the wall. Jake sputtered a cough; the wind knocked completely out of him. 

His girlfriend (or soon-to-be ex-girlfriend, really) shrieked and gawked her eyes in horror at the scene taking place in front of her. Bradley wasn’t supposed to find them, and he wasn’t supposed to know that the reason for their break up was because she was unfaithfully faithfully fucking another man. 

Tanner buttoned her blouse as fast as she could and pushed her denim shorts up her legs speedily. She had been embarrassed and ashamed before, but this was a whole new level. Not only had she been caught red-handed, but caught doing something dirty and quite possibly something illegal. 

Hangman had finally caught his breath. His blue eyes gazed up at Rooster with a gleam of mischief. He knew that there was no way for him to charm himself out of this one, and if he was gonna get his ass beat, the least he could do was have some fun with it. 

Jake sits up, tightening his belt his head, a smirk still on his face as he pulls up his pants and tightens his belt. “Oh look, it’s Chicken,” he scoffs, “I mean Rooster. How are you, man?” 

Bradley seethed with rage. His fist went straight to Jake’s eye, the impact making the blond pilot stumble back a bit. Jake had to admit, Bradley was one strong mother fucker and his eye swelling shut definitely proved his realization right. 

Bradley paused, trying to calm his breathing a bit before speaking. He knew that if he didn’t get himself under control, he may actually fucking murder Jake Seresin and although that wouldn’t be half bad, he worked too goddamn hard to get kicked out of the Navy and face criminal charges on the base. 

His ears were still glowing red and his breathing even heavier than before. Tanner stood in the doorway of the supply closet in shock and utter panic. 

“Ooh, you’re lucky you didn’t get my good side, Bradshaw,” Jake taunted, “But I’m sure Tan over there thinks every side is my good side. Don’t ya, baby?” 

And oh shit, Jacob Michael Seresin did have a fucking death wish and in that moment, it was evident that he really didn’t give a fuck what Bradley could do to him. Any opportunity to get underneath Bradshaw’s skin was a golden one, and Jake just couldn’t bring himself to not be an asshole. 

And oh, how Bradley fucking hated that. He grabbed the blond pilot by the collar and yanks him up to stand. He was too angry to speak. Shit, his brain was so fried from all the heat his body was exuding that he couldn’t even begin to think of words to put into sentences that would even make any fucking sense. 

“Bradley, stop! Let him go!” Tanner yelled, and all of his senses in his body are turned off except for his tunnel vision sight and his sense of touch. That was made unmistakably apparent as each blow delivered to Hangman’s face and torso kept coming and coming and coming. 

Jake’s face was black and blue and he’s sure he has baseball sized bruises all up and down his upper body, but he didn’t care. He finally had another missile to add to his arsenal of things to fuck with Bradley’s head. The result of that alone outweighed the healing time he would need. 

Eventually, a commander walks by and pulls Rooster off of Hangman, and that was how he and Jake and Tanner all found themselves outside of Admiral Gadson’s office to tell their accounts of why Tanner’s bra was in the hallway and why Bradley’s face was beet red and why Jake’s right eye was swollen beyond belief. 

Rooster sat straight up and looked ahead, choosing to ignore the sounds of Tanner and Jake’s hushed conversation beside him. 

So that’s how Rooster found himself on garbage duty (”indefinitely”, Admiral Gadson had said, but he liked the kid and felt bad for him, so really, he said it meaning two weeks) and with no girlfriend. 

And yeah, Bradley Bradshaw definitely had a temper and was definitely naive. And as he’s picking up orange peels and scrubbing dried piss off of toilet bowls, he made note of two things: One, he desperately needed to keep his temper in check and two, he would never make the same mistake to trust a young girl like that ever again. 

Man, does it fucking suck being so fucking old. 

ii. 

(Y/N)’s body is on fire. 

She’s not particularly hot, per se, but she most certainly is flustered. And for once, the source of her panic isn’t from a deadline or an application or some bill she had to have transferred over from her college apartment to the new one she would be living in come fall semester for law school. 

No, (Y/N) is on fire because of the sandy-haired pilot beneath her right now. 

Bradley Bradshaw’s old Bronco was a lot roomier than she ever anticipated it being, but then again, she wasn’t that great with dimensions (Damn you, astigmatisms.) and she wasn’t big on cars or motorcycles or boats or planes or anything that supplied humans with transportation, really. 

She had just been responsible for closing the Hard Deck by herself again and like clockwork, the handsome aviator wandered his way inside to tell her about how he had misplaced his sunglasses and despite the fact that they were closed, he just had to find them tonight. 

(Y/N) knew it was a ploy for him to get to talk to her alone. The mischievous glint in his eye when the words came out of his mouth told her so and besides, his beloved aviator shades were practically glued to his face. So how the hell did he manage to lose them? 

“Crazy how they’re basically glued to your damn head and you managed to lose them,” (Y/N) teases, rounding out from behind the bar to help Bradley search for the glasses, ”How the hell are you a pilot? Get lost often, too?” 

Rooster shakes his head, his gaze falling on the floor and his hands finding the sanctuary of his front pockets. The smile on his face gives his true intentions away, but he’s unaware that (Y/N) notices this. 

“Directions are different than placement,” he jokes, “I do happen to be smarter than a fifth-grader, you know.” 

The joke sits in the air for a few seconds before (Y/N) realizes that she has a stupid grin on her face and that damn, he looks really good in the lighting of Hard Deck. 

“Obviously not because you can’t do simple math,” she chides, “I’m twenty-one. Not ten, jackass.” 

“Hmm,” he leans on the side of the bar top with a smug look on his face, “Couldn’t tell. That baby face of yours says otherwise. I think it’s the dimples.” 

She scoffs and puts her hand to her chest. “Jesus, Bradshaw. Weren’t you just trying to take me out on a date last week? Now I’m in fifth grade?” she starts looking around the bar floor for his sunglasses, “Seems pretty fucked up for a Navy man, don’t you think?” 

“Pretty fucked up that you know I’m in the Navy and have a rank but refuse to use it when you address me,” Rooster quips. He starts to look on the floor of the booths near the area (Y/N) is searching. 

(Y/N) stands up straight and crosses her arms. She takes a deep breath before approaching Bradley, putting a hand on his chest and giving him her doe eyes. 

“I’m so sorry, Lieutenant Bradshaw,” she adds extra thirst to her tone, ” How could I ever can I make it up to you? I’m just so young that I don’t know any better.” 

Bradley grins and takes (Y/N)’s hand on his chest in his and entangles their fingers. He looks down at their conjoined hands, his pointer finger running across her newly obtained class ring. 

His tongue comes out to lick at his bottom lip before his gaze shifts from their hands to (Y/N)’s face. 

“I can think of a few things.” 

He reaches up to grab the side of her face and pulls her in for a kiss. It’s soft, sweet even. It reminds her of how grooms kiss their brides during their wedding ceremonies. His lips are soft and plush, she thinks, and that was the best goddamn kiss she’s ever had in her entire life. 

(Y/N) detaches their lips and reaches up, taking both of her arms and looping them around Bradley’s neck. His hands move to her waist and he leans down to kiss her once more. This time he deepens it. The kisses are still soft and on target, never leaving her lips once at all. He’s not messy or miscalculated. It’s almost eerie, how his kisses are deep and starting to get rough but yet he was still thoughtful and delicate with her. 

His tongue swipes against (Y/N)’s top lip, and she opens her mouth to let it enter. (Y/N)’s not super experienced. She’s only ever kissed her college ex-boyfriend like this and they had broken up the summer going into her Junior year so it’s safe to say that it’s been a while. 

The sparkle in both of their eyes says the same thing, and she’s taking his hand in hers and leading him out of the front door of Hard Deck. He hugs her from behind as she struggles to lock the door, the kisses he’s planting on her neck making her giggle and lose focus. 

“Stop it, Bradshaw,” she says between laughs, ‘Penny’ll kill me if this door doesn’t get locked which means you can’t keep coming back to get me alone because I won’t be allowed to close by myself again.” 

Rooster giggles into her neck, his chuckle and the hairs from his mustache tickling her neck. 

“I bet I could sweet talk her,” he says, landing another kiss on the dip of skin just behind her earlobe, “She doesn’t call me sweet pea, for nothin’.” 

(Y/N) turns around and kisses him on the lips. “You stole my nickname, you fucker, so matter of fact, maybe I won’t lock the door because you can’t be trusted anymore.” 

Rooster brings her face closer to his again. His teeth tug on her bottom lip, not hard enough to draw blood but hard enough to make her wince. 

“She was my aunt before she was yours,” he says, lips grazing over hers, “Remember to respect your elders, chick.” 

“Well if you’re going off of that guise, I’m not sure how Penny would feel watching us make out in front of the door when she watches the cameras back tomorrow morning.” 

(Y/N)’s statement makes Rooster back up and embarrassment washes over his face. (Y/N) had only ever seen the pilot with a smirk on his face; confidence and glee the primary emotions energizing his expression. To see him embarrassed was a sight for sore eyes. 

“Let’s move our transaction to my car, hmm?” he asks, hands finding her hips. (Y/N) nods eagerly and Bradley takes her to the beloved 1977 baby blue Ford Bronco that he had inherited from his father when he had turned sixteen many moons ago. 

He opens the passenger door for her before walking to the driver’s side. (Y/N) climbs in and shuts it, and the soft sound of metal falling on the floor of the car can be heard. She cranes her neck and moves her knees to the side to retrieve whatever had fallen from the force of the door closing.

And fuck, Bradley Bradshaw was either blind or a liar because low and behold, his “lost” sunglasses are in her hand. 

He shuts the door to his side of the vehicle and a small smile is on his face. He doesn’t turn to face her just yet. He knows that she’s found them and if he’s starting to figure her out as well as he thinks he is, he knows that her voice will be pipping up from the right side of his car in three, two, one- 

“You know, if you wanted to make out with me, Bradshaw you could’ve just asked,” she says, placing the aviators in his cupholder, “I’m not a floozy, but I wouldn’t have said no to you.” 

“Where’s the fun in that?” he asks, turning to face her head-on, “And I don’t think you’re a floozy, baby. If so, only for me, right?” 

He gives her a smile and the inky blue of the California night sky paints a mural for her eyes. She never thought she would be into pilots, let alone older men, but yet, here she is in the passenger seat of a Ford Bronco, trying to debate if she should leave him hanging and only make out with him, or go all the way. 

He’s so damn fit and such a good kisser. The way he looks at her makes her mouth water and the way he teases her makes her so fucking wet. The ball is in her court and the hard part isn’t playing, but deciding when to start. 

(Y/N) leans over to kiss him again and this time, she grabs his face with both hands. There’s a warmth in the pit of her stomach and a hunger in her eyes. Bradley reclines his seat with one hand and guides her over to straddle his lap with the other. 

He thought he was way past the need for messy sex in the driver’s seat of his car, but you can never set expectations without some minor setback now, can you? 

(Y/N) is so goddamn horny and ready for him. She can’t remember being this desperate for anyone, really, and of course, she’s had sex before but she never remembers it being exceptionally good. It was just okay enough to get by and she always figured that she had enough time to have all the mind-blowing sex in the world the older she got. She was only twenty-one now, for fucks sake. 

Bradley’s as hard as a fucking rock and he doesn’t know if it’s the adrenaline pumping through his veins at fucking in the parking lot of such a popular place or if it’s exciting because he has a knockout sitting in his lap, her clothed cunt (that he knows has to be absolutely soaked for him) grinding like hell over his growing erection. 

He’s not been this horny since high school and if he was in a clearer state of mind (and maybe a better man too, he thinks) he would’ve opted to have taken her to dinner and then back to his place. At least there he had a bed and a couch they could fuck like rabbits on. Both pieces of furniture are government property technically, but then again, so is he until his service duty is up, so what even is the big deal? 

“Fuck, chick,” he breathes, grabbing her hips to push her down on his hardened clothed cock even more, “You’re such a good kisser.” 

She giggles into his mouth and fuck, he’s a goner. 

‘Yeah?” she asks, grinding herself even more onto his erection. She lets out a small moan (one that she thought Bradley couldn’t hear but his slight chuckle of amusement lets her know that she’s been caught) as the layers separating her bare pussy from his denim-clad package catches on her clit just right. 

“Yeah, baby. You’re a fucking knockout.” 

This makes her smile even more. Their kisses are sloppy now, the constant grinding crafting a veil of ecstasy around them both. 

“(Y/N)?” he asks. His fingers unbutton her shorts and starts to slide them down her legs.

“Yeah?” she answers. Her cut-offs are completely off her legs and on the floor near Bradley’s feet. The lilac-colored panties she had on were completely soaked where her weepy hole sat. 

If it was under any other circumstance or with any other person, she would find herself flushing pink and attempting to hide her face in her hands. But her arousal and also the fact that she feels so secure in what Bradley is doing with her prevents that. 

“Are you awake?” he asks. 

She doesn’t answer him, just continues to move her hips in circles in his lap. Her head is thrown back and the pressure and slight burn his jeans are providing her hardened clit feels like a slice of heaven. 

“Sweet pea? Are you awake?” he asks again, but this time, his voice doesn’t sound like his. 

It’s too high pitched; too womanly. 

“What the fuck?” she questions and then she hears it again, and the view of her surroundings starts to blur and everything starts to fade.

She’s completely pantless standing in a sea of black and then she hears it again. 

“(Y/N )? I’m headed out. Text me if you need anything!” and she recognizes it as her godmother’s voice. And then it clicks, and holy hell, the idea of Penny finding her like this terrifies her. 

(Y/N) shoots up in her bed, the sleep shirt she had worn completely soaked through with sweat. 

“Jesus Christ,” she sighs to herself, palms rubbing at her eyes to help process what the actual fuck just happened. 

And as she stands in the shower with the cold water running and the sunlight shining through the stained glass window Penny had in her guest bathroom, she feels ashamed. 

She just had a wet dream about Bradley Bradshaw like a fucking teenager and shit, maybe he was right. She was too young for him to take her out. 

iii.

Bradley was always surprisingly nervous. 

As a pilot, he was a total adrenaline junkie and small things that make his heart race satiate him enough to get through the day. He was naturally inclined to panic but every time his stomach dropped or he felt like his heart would stop from how hard the muscle was pumping, it filled him with a sense of euphoria. 

Pilots can’t be nervous wrecks. Especially naval pilots, and that was a lesson he had learned rather early. He picked this up through recounts of his Uncle Mav and Uncle Ice’s stories when they would be in charge of watching him while his mom worked the night shift. The mission impossible-like stories replaced his bedtime stories when his mom wasn’t home and Bradley never had the heart to tell her, but he would rather listen to Maverick and Iceman before he ever heard her rendition of “Goodnight, Moon” ever again.

But one thing was sure and that one thing stuck with him forever. Pilots can’t be nervous. Getting nervous would get you killed; whether that be shot down, captured, or ejected from your aircraft was up to the pilot and the cockpit was already small enough as is. There is absolutely no room for such a large feeling like nervousness. 

So his entire life up to this point at thirty-five years old, he always found a way to dodge his nervousness. Is it healthy? Not really. Does it help? Well, not really either but he doesn’t really have much of a choice now. 

Wanting to ask a girl he liked out on a date? Oh, the fast beating of his heart when he approached her wasn’t nerves, it was just because he liked her so much. She thought that him saying his heart “Beats louder for you because it wants you to hear how much you mean to me,” was endearing and Bradley knew he was lying and he was literally about to shit himself from the anxiety looming in his chest. 

He was the starting pitcher for the boy’s high school state game? He wasn’t nervous, just excited, he would say even though the blown look of his pupils and the gnarly sweat stains near his armpits told everyone else otherwise. 

He was getting ready for his promotion to Junior Lieutenant and had to be absolutely perfect and could not afford to fuck up under any circumstances? Bradley wasn’t nervous. He was just so undeniably ready to work his way up the ranks. But really, his palms were so goddamn sweaty he’s sure that he grossed out two Captains and one Admiral when he went to shake their hands. 

And there are so many other instances that he could name and correct his nervousness for another feeling, perhaps. 

Unbeknownst to him, Rooster Bradshaw never really knew that thinking about his feelings this way was unhealthy and was probably (well definitely, really) preventing him from being a fully emotionally intelligent man the way his mother would have liked him to be. 

So no, Bradley Bradshaw didn’t get nervous per se but when the dark-haired pilot walks into a room filled with twelve of the best naval fighter pilots in the nation, he’s alarmed. Bradley is competitive, no doubt about that, but at the end of the day he can’t help but remain the team player his parents had raised him to be. 

His “no man left behind” mentality had gotten him caught up numerous times before and his need to ensure that everything was fair made him known to be a stickler. 

But is he nervous? Hell no. Just slightly worried; scared, even because when the nation’s best is sitting in a squad room with their flight suits on and no information about what was going on, whatever was to come had to be huge; even bigger than all their egos totaled together. 

Hangman makes some shitty joke about Bob’s glasses; something along the lines of “four eyes” and how the Navy doesn’t need satellite cameras to spy on people. They could just look through Bob’s glasses and see all that they need to see. 

It earns a few chuckles from the other pilots sitting around and even if Rooster was itching to talk or do something to occupy his mind, he absolutely refused to acknowledge Jake Seresin more than what was necessary. 

Phoenix walks to her seat and “trips” on Hangman’s chair, tugging the leg back not enough to pull him out from under completely, but enough to startle him and make him choke on the words he was fixing to leave his mouth. 

Everyone chuckles a bit before they’re made aware of Admirals Simpson and Bates coming to speak to them. Bradley straightens up in his seat. He was always so painfully self-aware and he didn’t need something else to pick apart about the interactions he had had today while he lays in bed at night.

They’re given the run down of why they’re all there which, in Rooster’s mind, is always the same. 

They get told how talented they are and how well they perform in their roles. It’s always one big confidence boost before getting pushed off the cliff to the reality of the situation. Because they’re so good they’re going to be shipped off to play mission impossible, and because it’s mission impossible, there’s an even larger chance that they won’t make it back alive. 

Rooster’s had at least twelve of these talks in the last ten years he’s been flying and before, the thought of being up in the air, unaware if clouds and a blue sky were the last things he would ever see scared him. 

But then he kept making it back and he kept getting “invited” (more like ordered) to carry out more prestigious and dangerous missions. So no, Rooster isn’t nervous at all. There’s nothing new to the expectations he and his fellow pilots are under. The word “curveball” ceases to exist in the Navy’s vocabulary, anyway. 

And as much as he tries to be respectful and attentive, his mind starts to wander and the evasive thoughts that he usually has take precedence over what’s currently unfolding in front of him. 

He looks the Admirals in the eye, but little did they know that his mind was far from the pupils of the respected Navy men in front of him. 

It’s not until he hears the word that he freezes. His heart stops. His blood runs cold. His ears start to glow red and he has to flex his fingers on both hands repeatedly to keep it together. He’s not felt like this since high school when he had to give his Valedictorian speech. 

“Maverick.” 

He didn’t know that the word alone would make his blood run cold, but it does. 

It’s then when he realizes that fuck, he should’ve allowed himself to feel nervous every once in a while because he’s not even sure what feeling he’s feeling right now is even called. 

He’s scared. He’s angry. He’s hurt. He’s saddened. He’s resentful, and he guesses that all of this can be added up and made to equal out to simply being nervous. 

Bradley figures that Maverick feels the same way too because it’s obvious that his gaze refuses to catch his the entire time he’s speaking. He hadn’t seen his Uncle Mav in years, and he certainly wasn’t planning on the first time he saw him being today of all days. 

It’s hard to believe that he was his stand in dad for so much of his life. He was the guy that attended his Kindergarten graduation. The guy who taught him how to shave his face and how to talk to girls. He was the guy who came to as many baseball games that he was able to fit into his busy military schedule and the guy who he practiced his Valedictorian speech in front of for weeks. He was the same guy who held him when his mother finally passed away and the same guy who let him sleep in his bed while he slept on the floor when he had nightmares after her death.

Maverick encapsulates what Bradley’s childhood was and even though he can’t help it and wants to hate him, he can’t stop himself from looking at his godfather with child-like wonder. 

But then Bradley shuts that down as soon as it enters his mind. 

Fuck that. 

He was Bradley then. He’s Rooster now, and Maverick had his chance and blew it. 

Pilots don’t get nervous because it can get you killed. But what they don’t clarify is that you can be killed physically or emotionally and Bradley is too damn prideful to figure out which one they really meant. 

iv. 

It’s been two days since (Y/N) found herself closing the Hard Deck by herself with the unwarranted help of Bradley Bradshaw. 

It’s been forty-eight hours since he flirted with her and offered to take her out on a date. It’s been two-thousand eight-hundred and eighty minutes since he smiled at her and asked her how old she was. And it’s been one-hundred seventy-two thousand eight hundred seconds since he laughed at her and told her that she was too young. 

And although two days isn’t a long time (unless you’re five years old and your perception of one minute is a literal fucking second) it feels like a lifetime and God, the counting and the flashbacks and the remembering has been eating her alive; even more so than her being bored. 

The embarrassment of her recent wet dream is all consuming too, but she knows she’s too shy to ever utter that admission out loud. It’s one less thing she has to worry about, but five new insecurities and emotions she has to face now. 

(Y/N)’s kept her eye out for Bradley the entire night. 

She had seen the familiar gang of Navy pilots come in. Hangman had come in and sat with her at the bar for a little bit, telling her about his day and throwing in some cheap flirtatious remarks here and there. She has half the mind to ask him where his friend is, but from the interactions between the two she had clocked from the corner of her eye two days prior, she knows better than to do so.

Jake would probably laugh in her face and accuse her of having some school girl crush on Bradley. The blond was relentless with his teasing, and if he had come across a weak spot, he would use it until the river of discomfort it caused the other person ran dry. 

“Don’t look so sad, pretty girl. I’m here now,” he had said, and all (Y/N) could offer him was a free beer and a soft smile. 

But that was two hours ago and the fleet of Navy pilots had long since left Hard Deck. Jake had mentioned something about early training tomorrow morning and how he had to leave so it left no surprise that once he headed out, everyone else who was in Miramar for the same mission followed. 

(Y/N) is slightly relieved that she didn’t have to face Bradley tonight. She knows that she has a tendency to ramble when she gets extremely nervous and the fact that she dreamt about dry humping him in the driver’s seat of his car definitely adds fuel to the fire of embarrassment that burns deep in the pit of her stomach. 

It’s a Monday night and the bar closes at midnight rather than its usual 1 AM. Aunt Penny had let (Y/N) close the bar by herself for the past two nights so when she had slipped out with some excuse about Amelia (which (Y/N) knows is bullshit and that her godmother was really going to visit Maverick, but nevertheless she doesn’t call her out on it) it was decided that (Y/N) was responsible and ready enough to close on her own. 

Even though the bar has been closed since midnight, (Y/N) can’t help but take her time shutting down for the night with hopes that the brunette pilot would show face before she turned the lights off and locked the door. 

The jukebox had been unplugged and the glasses had been washed and set out to dry. The bar top had been scrubbed clean and all the napkin dispensers were full. (Y/N) even went the extra mile and made sure all the bathrooms had soap and paper towel because she was that desperate for stupid Bradley Bradshaw to come in and kiss her breathless. 

She doesn’t think of herself to be a hopeless romantic, but she does have a tendency to hope for the best and sometimes the best isn’t realistic in the slightest. She would probably never see him again and he probably was turned off by how young she was. He was probably ready to settle down soon and get married and be a homeowner and have kids and the thought of something so permanent made (Y/N) a little nauseous. 

Sure, she wanted to be a wife and a mom and a homeowner but that’s some day and not any day soon. She hadn’t even gotten a chance to live by herself with no roommates yet, so how could she possibly be ready for marriage or kids? 

(Y/N) then realizes that she’s being extremely theoretical and that she should just turn her brain off and stop being delusional. Bradley Bradshaw was not walking through those doors tonight and Bradley Bradshaw was definitely not thinking about her the same way she was thinking about him. 

So as she scrubs the bar top counter one last time before she gets ready to leave, she hears the bell above the front door go off. She has half the mind to look up and to yell out that they’re closed, but she stays quiet. She figures the person who walked in would take the hint and see the bar basically abandoned and would turn on their heel and walk right back out. 

But when (Y/N) doesn’t hear the bell ding again signaling that the person had left, she puts the rag down and looks up. 

And holy shit, it’s Bradley standing right in front of her with his arms outstretched and leaning on the bar. 

He’s wearing a gray t-shirt with “NAVY” written in the middle and black running shorts. He has on Birkenstocks and his sunglasses are pushed up to rest on the top of his head. 

“Penny here?” he asks, “It’s kinda urgent.” His eyes look around, taking in the surroundings of the bar and fuck, he may be too late. Matter of fact, he knows that he’s too late. 

(Y/N) shakes her head. “We close at midnight during the week and it’s,” she looks at her watch, “Nearing one-thirty. You missed her by like two hours, Bradley. Sorry.” 

Bradley shakes his head and locks eyes with her. His eyes are filed with so much emotion and she can almost see his subconscious drowning in whatever sorrows he was battling with internally. He looks hurt, scared even. It was totally opposite the fire and childish twinkle they held two days prior as he mindlessly flirted with her when searching for his wallet. 

(Y/N) knows something had happened but she figures that it’s not her right to pry. She’s quite a private person herself and knows how annoying it is when people try and get into her head. 

Some things just aren’t for other people to know. 

“Hey, why don’t we go for a walk or something as soon as I close this place up?” she offers. 

She only does because she knows that he needs someone to talk to and something to take his mind off of whatever was troubling him, but she also does it selfishly; knowing that this was also an opportunity for her to get him alone and actually get to know who Bradley Bradshaw is. 

He offers her a soft smile. “Yeah. Yeah,” he says, wiping the corners of his mouth with his pointer finger and thumb, “I would like that. A lot.” 

(Y/N) offers a grin and a light laugh before exiting the bar and turning off the lights. He opens the door for her and she locks it, putting the keys in her car before they head out to the beach near the strip of buildings where the Hard Deck is located. 

The inky blue sky takes (Y/N) back to her rather embarrassing but hot dream about the Lieutenant and she feels her cheeks getting pink. She thanks God that they’re outside and that it’s dark and that he’s not really looking at her because her sudden flush would be hard to explain. 

While they walk down the beach they talk about any and everything. 

She tells him how she choked on a Lifesaver once in first grade and cried so hard that she threw it up. He tells her about how he sliced the back of his ear open in third grade from climbing on top of his kitchen counter and banging his head on the door to his mom’s spice cabinet. She talks about how she had totaled her first car when she was sixteen because she was riding an old lady’s ass and didn’t have enough time to brake before a turn. He tells her about the time he concussed himself from hitting his head on the glass of his aircraft because he wasn’t strapped in tight enough. 

The silences in between stories is comfortable and his voice soothes her. Her heart isn’t beating out of her chest like she thought it would be doing. She’s not anxious or panicked. She’s relaxed and she realizes then that that’s what Bradley Bradshaw’s aura does to her. 

They walk back to the parking lot of Hard Deck and he walks her back to her car. 

He opens her car door for her and she teasingly gasps, “Oh, what a gentleman, Bradshaw.” 

Bradley gives her a grin, “Can say my momma raised me right. Nothing but the best for you, chick.” 

Chick. 

It makes her tingly inside that he calls her that. It’s her nickname for him and although it’s kind of funky, it’s sweet, in a way. Well, she relishes in the fact that Penny calls her sweet pea still so chick can’t be so bad in comparison to that. Besides, what else did she expect from a guy who goes by “Rooster” casually? 

“Told you I wasn’t cheap, Bradley. None of this should be a surprise to you.” She smiles at him and he steps closer to her. 

He looks down into her eyes and his hands go up to cup the side of her face and for a second, (Y/N)’s heart stops. Is this really happening, or is this some plot to another one of her embarrassing wet dreams again? 

Bradley wants to kiss her. He wants to kiss her so fucking bad but it’s almost like there’s some invisible force preventing him from moving. He knows that that’s not true and that the force is himself because he tends to be his own worst enemy in situations like this. 

So instead he settles for an affectionate squeeze to the right side of her face with his palm. “I wish you weren’t so young.” 

And with that, he walks to his car and shuts the door, starting his car and sitting in it until (Y/N)  decides to pull out of the Hard Deck parking lot. 

He wishes she wasn’t so young and that he wasn’t so old as he drives back to his government supplied housing and little does he know is that (Y/N) lays in bed with a frown on her face thinking the opposite. 

[spadesolace]

childish antics: wil! minji x fem!reader

they say, you know they’re the one if they support your childish antics. minji just so happens to be the same person who wants to stay at home and build legos with you.

warning/s: none, established relationship, not proofread

spade speaks: you can read this as stand alone, no need to read what is love first

as childish as it may seem, you managed to persuade minji into buying lego sets.

college life has been hectic, within the first three months at Korea University, the amount of papers and experiments you and minji have done just led to burnout. providing a solution to it was playing with legos, at first minji was hesitant because shouldn’t you two be saving money to pay for your necessities?

“well… yeah but i have enough money saved up to at least buy two lego sets.”

“save it, yn. who knows when we might need those funds.”

hanni was right, you two do act like an old married couple. considering you now both live together, do weekly hangouts with your friends and treat them as your children, and discuss things that only married couples do. that’s probably due to the fact you’ve been friends since elementary.

“please, we can just get those small ones and not those big sets.” minji was already planning on buying a set for your 8th month anniversary but then again, this is one of the rare occurrences of your professors being chill.

“fine, we’ll just buy the small ones.”

“this is why i love you.”

looking around the big lego store that was near their place, minji slowly regretted agreeing to buying the small sets. the small ones were something you could finish on your own right away, while the big sets, specifically the one you’re eyeing, is perfect for the budget and an activity of you two. those puppy dog eyes that usually don’t work easily on minji suddenly paid off as she saw you holding the starry night set. she deeply regrets saying yes to the small sets, now that she sees the way you’re jumping up and down after paying.

before you could actually leave the store, you noticed the make your own character, pulling minji back in and telling her your genius plan of making one for the both of you and the last one being a complete mess of a character.

“I’ll pay for it, i promise.” you’ve always been true to your words and minji could only nod but explained she wanted to build you as a lego, while you make her character. simple, but not a lot of pieces have that specific wow factor that made you think of minji. 

after 10 minutes of making your own minifigure, deciding to surprise each other, only ended up with the two of you laughing.

“WHY’D YOU GIVE ME A RAT AS AN ACCESSORY?!”

“DON’T ACT ALL INNOCENT, YOU GAVE ME A COKE ZERO!”

you continued teasing her about that one song she wrote on the whim about coke zero, it was catchy but it felt out of place at the same time. the way minji just laughs at your antics catches you off guard on how you manage to be her girlfriend. you spent years pining for her and finally you’re together still acting like best friends who kiss each other and are staying under the same roof. as minji’s laugh died down, she could only stare back at you with confusion, a small smile on your face and seeing as your minifigures are holding each other’s hand.

“what?”

“nothing, i’m just- in awe.” you kissed minji on the cheek, pulling away you started looking for pieces for the last minifigure.

“don’t give it an afro.” as childish it may seem, when you’re with minji, you don’t care anymore. she’s definitely the one you want to spend the rest of your life with, someone who supports your childish antics and lets you have fun when things get rough.

“the last one surely looks like it got my style and your looks, darling.”

“maybe that’s something we’ll see in the near future.”

gosh, you really love kim minji.

[seungified]

let the light in ౨ৎ lee heeseung + fem reader genre best friends to lovers wc 1.02k warnings kissing , mention of food.

heeseung drove up to your house at exactly 7:30 pm, smile plastered on his face as he honked the horn. his smile somehow grew even bigger as he watched you stumble out of your house and into the passenger seat of his car.

“in a rush?” he giggles as he hands you the coffee he bought for you. you roll your eyes and take the coffee.

“shut the hell up, i hate you,” you take a sip of the coffee, it was your exact order, of course heeseung would remember.

“you love me.” heeseung smiles as he pulls out of your driveway, reminding you of the internal conflict that you were facing. heeseung was absolutely right, you do love him, but will you ever admit to it? hell no.

when you had problems, heeseung was the first person you’d run to ever since becoming friends with him back in 9th grade, but you couldn’t ever bring this one up to him.

it was right after you left for college that you realized your feelings for heeseung. you were sitting with your roommate, minjeong in a starbucks and you somehow got onto the topic of high school friends.

“i had a few close friends,” you say, taking a sip of your coffee. “but i was probably closest with my friend heeseung.”

“you talk about him a lot,” the other girl says, giggling and raising her brows. “you sure he’s just a friend?”

“what?” you say furrowing your brows. “me and hee are just friends.” you laugh.

minjeong keeps talking about her high school friends, but you aren’t really listening. you keep thinking about what she said, replaying your memories with heeseung. all those times those old people mistook him as your boyfriend, all the times you’d be upset when he would mention another girl, the way heeseung made you feel was never just friendly.

a week later you laid awake in your bed, still thinking about your new realization.

“minjeong,” you whisper. “are you up?”

“yeah, i cant sleep.” she says, rolling over to look at you.

“i think i’m in love with heeseung.” minjeong just smiles and turns back over.

“i fucking knew it.”

you giggle at the memory. minjeong is still your roommate back at your university and reminds you to confess your feelings almost every single time you mention visiting your hometown.

“what’s so funny?” heeseung asks, snapping you back into reality.

“nothing, i was just thinking about my roommate.” you say, finishing off your cup of coffee.

“i always miss you so much when you leave.” heeseung says, catching you slightly off guard, heat rises too your face.

“i-i miss you too.” you stutter out, smiling nervously.

“i kinda hate that you go to collage so far away, i miss sneaking over to your house at night.” heeseung says, you start laughing. “what? i miss our movie nights!” you both are laughing now.

“well then why don’t we do a movie night tonight? just like when we were in high school?” you suggest, heeseungs face lights up.

after driving around for a little over twenty minutes, you stop at a convenience store for snacks and then head to heeseungs place.

you walk into the apartment that you had become pretty familiar with all the times you’ve visited in the past year. you loved heeseungs apartment because it’s always so comfortable and warm when it starts to get cold. you flop on the couch in the spacious living room.

“hee, i missed your couch so much! it’s so comfortable.” heeseung smiles and sits next to you on the couch, putting his arm around you, your cheeks flush pink. you guys eventually decide on watching train to busan, getting comfortable beside each other.

in the middle of the movie you start to get tired. “hee, can i lay on your lap?” you nervously ask, looking at him.

“yeah of course, get comfortable.” heeseung says, lightly pushing your shoulder into him a little more, you lay down on his lap. soon enough, heeseung’s hands are playing with your hair, and you fall asleep.

when you wake up, heeseung is smiling down at you. “hey sleepyhead,” he says, you groan in response. “i wanna show you something, get up.”

you both get up and heeseung leads you out of his apartment and eventually out onto the roof. he takes you to the edge and tells you to look out. off into the distance, you can see the now small lights of seoul from heeseung’s apartment.

“wow hee, this is beautiful.” you smile. your mind screams at you, tonight is the night!! tell him!!

“everytime i miss you a little too much, i just come up here and look at seoul to try and remind myself that you aren’t that far away.” your mind can’t take this anymore, you turn to heeseung,

“hee, i really need to tell you something.” you say, the wind blowing your hair perfectly and the light of the moon shining on you making you look dreamlike to heeseung.

“me too honestly.”

“you can go first.” you say, smiling.

“y/n… you’re my best friend,” you nod. “but i cant help but feel like we both want to be more than best friends.” you don’t know what to say, is heeseung saying he feels the same? “what i’m trying to say is that i am in love with you y/n, and i have been since the day we met in 9th grade.” you can’t help the tears that flow from your eyes as you take in what he told you. “it’s ok if you don’t-”

you quickly cut him off by pulling him in for a kiss, a kiss you didn’t even know you’ve been waiting for 8 years. you smile as you pull away from him.

“i’m in love with you too heeseung.” you both smile and heeseung pulls you into a tight hug.

“i’m so glad you feel the same,” he says. “you trying to watch another movie?”

“always.”

[feelmyskinonyourskin]

Not a thot but a question, do you have any headcanons for Frank/Matt/Bucky?

Ohhh yeah I have a few. Thanks for your patience, I wanted to respond to this when I could sit and think and type everything out on my computer, not on my phone. Normal HCs at the top, spicy stuff below the cut.

Matt

Okay so I had this friend in highschool who was beyond disgusted by peanut butter, no allergy just totally hated the stuff. Like wouldn't kiss his girlfriend if she'd eaten it recently. I feel like Matt has an extreme food ick like this. Def not peanut butter but something like olive oil maybe? With his sensitive senses he gags when he even gets a whiff of whatever it is.

Speaking of peanut butter, I think it's a food staple of Matt's. The man can't take care of himself, so cooking full meals is just not a thing for him. So 2AM, back from patrol and he needs something to eat. Matt just eats PB straight out of the jar with a spoon like I did for meals in college.

Frank

Loves karaoke. Well, used to when he lived a more normal life. I don't think he sings amazingly well, but he doesn't care. He plays guitar obviously and Col. Shoonover mentioned his impressions skills, so that all concludes me to the fact the Frank likes to sing. He sings to himself/along with the radio when he's driving by himself between jobs. A lot of John Denver and Elton John.

For a holiday/birthday/anniversary gift one year he absolutely recorded Maria a CD of him playing and singing a few of her favorite songs. He'd probably do the same for you too if you were dating.

Bucky

Has a bit of a video game addiction. He was so fascinated by Stark tech at the fair, that I imagine he loves learning about everything that has come along since, but really got hooked on video games. I'm thinking your standard XBOX, Nintendo or Playstation games like the MLB/Baseball game and the Mario collection. Not big on first person shooter games like Call of Duty cause he's lived it obviously. But he can literally spend hours playing like FIFA or something. Absolutely gets on live to play with Sam, AJ, and Cass all the time.

Spicy Thots under the cut, 18+ please, I tried to keep it gender neutral in terms of x reader

Matt

Is really touchy during sex and also not during sex. Since the visual stimulation of sex obviously isn't there for him, he makes up for it by always having to be pressed against you fully or by having hands roaming and groping everywhere.

But also not during sex he's always grounding himself to you by being pressed as close to you as possible. Only time he isn't is when he's in a Matty Mood™ and feels like he doesn't deserve you or you deserve better or whatever Catholic guilt BS he tells himself. He gets over it eventually.

I feel like he likes really intimate sex but also is really playful during it as well. We saw a glimpse of this in She Hulk but I also think his just generally flirty demeanor hints at this. I'm talking like does things to make you giggle in the middle of sex.

Man also has a bit of a breeding kink. He's absolutely not ready to be a parent because his life is in shambles and as much as he loved his dad, he did not have good parental examples in his life, but regardless of his partner's gender or bodily anatomy, he likes the idea of filling you up, knocking you up and having that claim on you. I'm again blaming the Catholicism somehow.

Frank

The eye contact during sex!!!! Dude lost his whole family so anything good in his life he is afraid is going to slip away so he treasures it and takes it all in. We saw this during S2 with Beth but yeah, big guy just loves to watch every facial expression you make during sex.

He's also just really tender in bed. He's not big on kink stuff but will try it if you want but just wants to feel really connected during sex. He's mostly serious in bed but in a really beautiful and intimate way.

Mostly groans and grunts but loves to thrown in a "c'mon baby girl/boy" and begs for "just one more for me"

Bucky

I wrote a whole spiel about my Bucky bedroom hcs, but here's some more.

Of the three, I feel like Bucky is most playful and open to new things in bed. I don't think any of them are open to a full on Daddy kink, dom-sub kind of play but Bucky is the most likely to lean into elements and try things. After his time being under someone else's control I think he likes to feel a little in control, especially of his own body and sex life. But again, not fully into that type of dynamic. Like he might like to boss you around a little or call you dirty names in bed. Afterall, 1940s Bucky was a total flirt and very smooth with the ladies, so it stands to reason in bed he'd still bring some of that out.

[starry-hughes]

"Why do we keep pretending we don't want to kiss each other?"

jack

star’s 1 year celly!

-

the amount of times you and jack almost kissed was a lot. you’d known jack since he moved to michigan. when you got accepted to a college in nyc he asked if you wanted to live with him, even offered to pay for your metro card so you could commute from jersey.

but it was always just jack and (y/n) best friends. jack and (y/n) best friends who everyone mistakes as lovers. jack and (y/n) best friends who probably almost kiss way too much.

the first time was the night after his first goal. he had been so excited. you were waiting in the hall after the game. standing with his parents and brothers as you all waited for jack. his parents asking about your studies when jack came bolting out of the locker room. only he would score his first goal against his brother. he skipped his parents and his brothers, immediately rushing to you as he hugged you. “congratulations,” you mumbled in his ear as he slipped a game puck into your jacket pocket. when he pulled away from the hug, for that brief second, you were both thinking you were going to kiss. jack pulled away, remembering his family next to the two of you.

the second time was a while later, almost two years later, when the devils were on a hot streak. celebrating with drinks after a particularly good game. you were drunk. jack normally had girls surrounding him but tonight, he had you. he had an arm around you, keeping you steady as you drank more. “you doing okay?” he asked laughing a little watching you struggle to find your cup on the table. “peachy!” your face was warm and eyes glassy as you looked at jack. he thought for a second, if he kissed you now would he taste the vodka crans or your lipgloss? you cleared your throat, looking away and pretending you didn’t want to kiss him. at least drunk you had some morals.

jack was home more when he wasn’t playing due to his injury. which was a blessing and a curse. you loved having him around. it was a bit hard though, being around the person you wanted to kiss all the time. luke was at an away game and it was just the two of you. you had shared a bottle of wine. then two. “what happened to that one girl you were seeing? what was her name?” you giggled. “oh, she broke it off because she didn’t like my relationship with you.”

you frowned, suddenly remembering you were in fact, just his best friend. “i hope i don’t cause problems like that all the time for you.” he panicked. “no! it’s not like that, you’re my best friend.” he cringed at his own words. the wine in your glass swirled. “i think i’m going to bed jack.” you stood quickly from the couch, the wine getting to you as you had to steady yourself.

“(y/n) wait.” jack stood.

“why do we keep pretending like we don’t want to kiss each other?” you finally asked. your cheeks were red and you were finally letting out emotions your held back for years. “we act like we don’t almost kiss one a week jack! o-or that we aren’t upset when one of us starts dating someone. i’m sick and tired of it. and if you don’t reciprocate anything then just stop making me hold out hope every time you almost kiss me.”

he looked at you, comprehending all your words. “i can’t live in the same space as you anymore if i’m just going to be waiting on something that never comes. i’ll just move to-”

jack kissed you. he kissed you so hard that it made up for all the times he didn’t kiss you before. he was done pretending. he let his hands run along the sides of your torso before he pulled you in. you subconsciously let your arms wrap around his shoulders and his neck. when jack finally pulled away, he breathed heavily, forehead resting on yours. “i’m done pretending,” he whispered.

[chxnsaphrodite]

Message in a Bottle (minho x reader)

minho x reader fake dating college au!

a/n: i'm a lil bit too proud of this piece so if you hate it keep it to yourself, this is also the first full-length fic i've written so. inspired by the love hypothesis! came up with the idea originally a year ago after finishing the book.

words: 11.2k

warnings: smut with plot, reader is a virgin, reader uses she/her pronouns, typos, slight corruption kink, protection IS USED FOR ONCE. minho calls the reader a whore like once...maybe twice, lmk if i missed any.

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to say lee minho was boyfriend material would be a mere understatement. to be honest, you saw him as nothing better than just some guy who plays with girls around campus, yet here you were, sealing the deal with him. “it would be for like two months, tops,” minho said. you bit the inside of your cheek.

“and what are you getting out of it? what would you gain?” you asked him.

“lia getting off of my back,” he replied snarkily. lia and minho were exes you could say, but lia was the most consistent girl minho has ever been with. they were known to show up to campus parties and then mysteriously disappear, probably jerking each other off in the host’s room. you were pretty sure minho had every possible std there was out there considering his reputation. but yet here he was, asking you to fake date him for two months. “listen if you’re uncomfortable we don’t have to, but i’m just saying you’d have a reason for the board to believe that you’re gonna still attend miroh college for the rest of the school year and you could get the funds-”

“okay okay i’ll do it just, lets make up rules,” you said, cutting him off. minho smirked.

“lay it on me,” he replied.

“first of all, no kissing, like ever,” you said.

“how are people gonna think we are dating if you wont kiss me?” minho asked.

“well there’s other ways  to show affection-”

“you really think someone would believe i wouldnt kiss my girlfriend in public?” minho pointed out. 

“okay um, but i- i dont know-”

“have you ever kissed someone y/n?” minho questioned you. you felt your face burnt up slightly.

“i uh well this boy in my 6th grade-”

“no i mean really kissed,” minho added.

“it was pretty real to me,” you commented. minho chuckled.

“okay, so no kissing, but pda?” he asked. you nodded.

“yeah like, hand-holding and stuff,” you stated.

“got it, could i add my own rule?” minho asked.

“sure,” you said.

“dont fall for me, i mean the whole point of this is so i can get a girl off my back, not get another one on,” he said. you nodded confidently.

“will do, won’t catch me slipping,”you replied. minho stuck his hand out to you.

“so its a deal then?”

“deal.”

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you desperately needed this grant from your school, and rumors of you and minho dating would be the perfect way to convince them. this was the first time your school had ever declined your request when it came to your films. your short films had gained multiple awards and praise for miroh college, but it’s because of these awards that other colleges had offered to give you a full-ride scholarship to their schools. to be honest, you had played with the idea of transferring to a film-based college, but you were waiting for one in particular. stray film college had been your dream school since you were 15, and they finally reached out to you. they promised a full-ride scholarship if you could produce one more film, a film that needed to be a personal film. you had no idea what to do for it, but you knew you would need funds for the mic set and to possibly pay actors. you don’t know how or why, but somehow the school caught wind of this, and now suddenly they refused to help you with production altogether. you hate to admit it, but minho’s plan could very likely be the key to your dream school.

you were typing yet another email to your department’s head when someone tapped on the top of your laptop. you looked up and met eyes with your friend, hyunjin. hyunjin ran his fingers through his currently, long blonde hair. “blonde again jinnie?” you asked. 

“i needed a change, plus i haven’t tried blonde with my long hair yet so i figured now was the time,” he replied. you chuckled as he took a sit across from you. the two of you met up in the school cafeteria often, ever since you guys met as freshmen. hyunjin was actually the only actor that would always act in your films for free. that’s how the two of you became friends in the first place. “what are you working on now, y/n?” hyunjin asked.

“typing another email, i need to get the funds,” you replied.

“you think they’ll give it to you?” he asked again. you sighed.

“no, but they might soon,” you replied.

“whats the plan? do i need to beat up mr. park?” he questioned. he said the last part with a smirk.

“no hyunjin, this plan does not require anyone being beat up,” you said, you looked around, “it’s a secret for now, i’m sure you’ll hear within the next few days or so.”. hyunjin turned his head to the right.

“what’re you up to?” he asked.

“so many questions! just dont worry about it. you just have to know i have it figured out,” you told him. that was when the messages started.

[minho: hey we need to go to this party tonight

[minho: lia is bringing her entire group there

[you: um ive never been to a party before…

[minho: ur shitting me right?

[you: nope.

[minho: ill pick you up, just be ready in like an hour or two.

[you: hour?

[minho: 2 max, you need to meet some of my friends before hand

[you: i know your friends.

[minho: you know the rumors about my friends, but you dont know my friends

[minho: plus how exactly do you plan on getting home if i end up black out drunk?

[you: 2 and half hours.

[minho: deal.

you closed your laptop. “looks like part of my plan is taking place, ive got to go get ready,” you said, standing up.

“call me later?” hyunjin asked. you shrugged.

“ill be out pretty late,” you commented.

“y/n…you’re not prostituting are you?!” hyunjin asked.

“no! just dont worry ill explain later.”

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you stood in front of the mirror looking at your outfit. you had picked a slightly skimpy outfit, but felt it was appropriate for the occasion, it was a baby pink pleated skirt with a black t shirt. that was when you heard a knock at your dorm’s door. you sighed, knowing it was probably minho already picking you up. you opened the door, and was greeted by a well dressed minho. “you ready?” he asked. you nodded.

the car ride to wherever minho was taking you was uncomfortably silent. to be honest, up to this point you and minho had rarely ever spoken, let alone crossed paths. “so uh…who’s hosting the party?” you asked.

“chris bang,” minho answered flatly.

“i thought you guys hated each other?” you questioned.

“listen, he comes to my friends’ parties all the time, its more of a rivalry if anything,” he stated. you looked out of the window. chris bang was another infamous man around campus. he was the head of the double knot frat, and had a similar reputation to minho. chris’ rep was totally different, where minho was known to be a complete heart breaker, chris was more of the never the same girl twice kind of guy. he never really talked to girls long enough for them to think he liked them, but long enough to be intimate. unbeknownst to you, minho really did hate him. he just didnt make a big deal about it, besides there were more important things to be focusing on, such as making lia go away. minho pulled into an apartment complex. “attention passenger, we have reached destination jisung and changbin’s apartment,” minho announced. minho walked over to your side and opened the door for you. “m’lady” he said, motioning his other arm towards the apartment entrance. you laughed a bit before standing up.

“thank you, sir,” you told him. you closed the car door behind you, after which minho put an arm around your shoulder. you jumped at first being shocked by his action.

“remember, im just your lovely new boyfriend,” he whispered into your ear. you nodded. minho walked you to the door. minho knocked on the door, and surprisingly neither jisung or changbin answered. “seungmin! you’re coming along?” minho asked the man who opened the door.

“why not, haven’t gone out with you guys in a while,” seungmin answered. seungmin met eyes with you and raised his eyebrows. “who’s the chick?” he asked. 

“shes-”

“the chick is me. i’m y/n, minho’s girlfriend,” you introduced. seungmin looked over at minho in slight disbelief.

“seungmin the airconditioning is on, close the door!” changbin called. changbin walked over towards the door to see what seungmin was doing, and once again you were looked at with wide eyes. “who-”

“this is y/n, my girlfriend, i was going to tell you guys once i got inside but seungmin felt the need to question us before hand,” minho explained.

“y/n? as in film major y/n?” changbin asked you. you smiled at the recognition for films, and nodded.

“the one and only,” you replied. changbin stuck his hand out.

“your films are awesome, it amazes me that someone that’s my age could produce something like that,” he told you. you shook his hand.

“wow , uh thank you, i didnt take you to be the film type?” you stated. changbin nodded. 

“come in come in!” changbin said excitedly. 

“is it just me or does changbin look more excited to talk to your girlfriend than us,” seungmin mumbled to minho as the two of you walked in. minho shrugged.

“as long as the lady is happy,” he replied. seungmin looked at minho again. 

“since when did you care this much about your girlfriends?” seungmin asked.

“since her,” minho replied, pointing to you and changbin happily chatting. jisung bursted into the room form his bedroom. 

“alright let’s get the show on the road, wooyoung is saying chris has some free alcohol and i do not want to miss it,” jisung announce, car keys in hand. jisung looked over at you, “hello there, and who might you be?”. minho protectively put his arm around your shoulders.

“y/n, is my plus one tonight,” minho grinned. you nodded.

“also minho’s latest girlfriend,” seungmin commented. jisung looked at you and minho and shrugged.

“okay, whatever, we need to leave, like now,” he told everyone in the room.

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the moment the 5 of you arrived at the party it was complete chaos. there were girls completely topless dancing on tables, people trying to down as many shots as possible, and pda in every corner. minho grabbed your hand. “follow my lead,” he whispered to you. for some reason, minho holding your hand made your heart skip a tad. you nodded. minho led you to the porch in the back, where there were many familar faces, but particularly lia and her posse. lia had 4 other friends, yeji, ryujin, chaeryeong, and a freshman yuna. as far as you knew, they were all daddy’s money and felt some sort of entitlement at miroh college. other faces you recognized on this porch was of course, chris bang and his close friends, felix and another freshman jeongin. “lee, nice of you to show,” chris commented. minho looked back up.

“wouldn’t miss it, bang,” he replied. it wasnt until you noticed lia practically glaring at you that you remembered you were still holding minho’s hand.

“y/n? right?” chris asked you. you nodded. chris looked back between you and minho. “you two an item or something?” chris asked minho

“my girlfriend actually,” minho answered. 

“you ever been to a party before director?” chris interrogated. you hesitated before nodding.

“no she hasn’t,” lia said.

“yes i have, maybe you just haven’t seen me before,” you shot back.

“really? well then maybe you wouldn’t mind playing a few drinking games, you know, with the girls,” lia added. you nodded, more confidently this time.

“totally,” you replied. lia looked back at her girls, and at the same time minho whispered to you,

“y/n are you sure about this? i could easily think of a way out of this-”

“let’s go then,” you stated confidently to lia. lia smirked. 

“sounds fun, you boys won’t mind if we disappear for an hour or two,” she asked. minho glared at lia, knowing she was up to something. “oh c’mon minho, let the girl have some girl time, besides who knows, maybe by the time we’re back you’ll have found someone else to play with,” lia replied snarkely. minho clenched his teeth, but you put your hand on his shoulder as a way to tell him it was alright. yeji got up form her chair.

“let’s go,” she told her friend. you followed the 5 girls back into the frat house, where you ended up in some unknown person’s room. there were many other girls you recognized from around the campus in the room. yeji picked up a random bottle on the floor and read the name. “here, “y/n, you’ve surely had this before,” yeji picked up a bottle that had the name ‘jagermeister’ printed on it, and handed it to you. truth be told, you knew next to nothing about alcohol, let alone had you drunk more than the champagne you drank at new years.

“of course,” you lied. yeji looked back up at lia. 

“why don’t you take a drink or two?” lia said, handing you the bottle. you opened the bottle, and got a whiff of a black licorice that made you want to throw up an entire lung. “go on,” lia told you. you gulped before you started chugging it. the other girls looked at you in shock.

“y/n are you okay?” chaeryeong asked you. you squeezed your eyes and nose before nodding.

“yeah, totally, like i said, i’ve drank before..” you trailed off, “maybe not as intense as that.”. lia let out a scoff. you stood up. “either way, im gonna find minho,” you said. you walked away from the room, and as you closed the door you sighed. 

“girls giving you a hard time?” a familiar voice called. you turned to see jisung. 

“uh yeah sure,” you answered. 

“y’know its only because lia believes you and minho’s ruse,” he replied. 

“yeah i- wait what?” you asked surprisingly.

“i can read right through you two, minho may be able to fool the others but he still can’t fool me,” jisung explained. you looked at him, and started to open your mouth when jisung said, “don’t worry i wont tell anyone, i’m not sure why you two decided to do this, but i won’t tell,”.

“thank you, jisung,” you said. jisung moved to the side.

“welp, i’ve gotta go do what i was doing before i met up with you,” jisung told you.

“yeah, of course,” you replied. jisung walked passed you, and you watched as he left. you walked down the stairs to the first floor of the frat house. as you stood and watched chaos, you could suddenly feel the rush of the drink from earlier sinking in. it was then you felt a tap on your shoulder. 

“y/n are you okay?” minho asked. you stared at him for a second before feeling a sudden rush to your gut. you shook your head before you threw up all over minho and yourself. 

it was like the world stopped in that moment and your first instinct was to run away.

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you ran down the street, with no real destination in mind other than far away from the doubleknot frat. suddenly your fuzzy mind was interrupted by a voice.

“y/n?”

“y/n??”

“y/n!!”

and suddenly you were blacked out.

you groaned as you awoke in an unfamiliar bed room, but a quick sniff of the bed sheets you recognized it was hyunjin’s. you sat up and felt your head pounding. “goodmorning, sleeping beauty,” hyunjin said, standing in the door way. 

“what happened?” you asked.

“i should be asking you the same thing,” hyunjin replied. you thought for a moment on the events of last night.

“i know i was at chris bang’s party,” you said, “oh my god minho!”.you reached for your phone, which hyunjin had (thankfully) taken the liberty to plug in for you. just a glance at the messages you suddenly remembered a key moment from last night.

[minho: hey where are you?

[minho: y/n this isnt funny, answer your phone

[minho: im sorry.

“whats got you so worked up, and whats up with you and minho?” hyunjin asked.

“have rumors already spread?” you said. hyunjin let out a sigh.

“unfortunately a bit more than just some rumors spread,” he told you, showing you a video someone had taken of you throwing up on minho. you closed your eyes and lifted your head back.

“of course,” you let out. hyunjin wrapped and arm around your shouldand rubbed your arm.

“hey on the brightside i brought you some hang over food!” hyunjin announced. hyunjin got out of the bed and walked to the kitchen. you sent a quick message to minho.

[y/n: im so sorry a million times over, could we meet up today?

[minho: yeah, campus research center?

[y/n: sounds good.

hyunjin walked in with a breakfast bagel sandwich and a smoothie concoction. “what;s the drink?” you asked.

“hangover juice,” he answered. you took the drink from his hands and took a big gulp of it. you squeezed your eyes and nose.

“that is so gross why would you even give me that!” you exclaimed.

“i never said it was good,” hyunjin mumbled.

the school’s research center was surprisingly empty, with just a few students surrounding you. you waited until minho finally showed up. 

“minho,” you called. 

“you ever heard of answering your phone?” he asked aggresively.

“i know, im sorry, i can pay for dry cleaning-”

“thats  not what i was worried about, you rand out of the party with no one, drunk and alone, do you know how scary that sounds?” minho asked you.

“i- uh, yeah,” you replied. there was an awkward pause.

“i’m sorry, y/n, i was just, i was really worried,” he stated. you nodded. “so you got home safe?” minho asked. 

“yeah, my friend hyunjin found me, luckily,” you asnwered.

“good,” minho said. 

“did lia believe it?” you asked. minho smirked.

“totally,” he told you, “according to changbin she wouldn’t shut up about it, but then the whole throwing up thing happened..”. you smacked your face with your hand.

“what am i going to do that video is so embarrassing,” you said.

“oh that's nothing, last year a video of jisung stripping completely naked surfaced,” minho told you. you shivered at the thought of a video of yourself stripping being spread without your consent. “besides its only spreading because i mean, who would expect you to be at bang’s party,” minho said.

“was it really that big of a deal?” you asked. minho nodded.

“look, this crowd of typical college kids know when theres someone new, let alone someone who’s already known around campus for films,” minho answered. there was an uncomfortable silence between the two of you.

“so uh, what now?” you asked.

“well i guess we have to make some more exclusive meetings now that the words out,” minho replied. 

“so dinner?” you suggested. 

“sure,” minho said.

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unsurprisingly, you arrived first to the local restaurant on campus. though it wasnt uncommon, minho was slightly late, but it had already been 15 minutes. you sighed as you checked your phone, expecting a text message saying he was caught up in something, but to no avail, nothing. suddenly you heard someone knock on the table. “minho- oh, uh chris,” you said, looking up at the bleach blonded man.

“fancy seeing you here, y/n, lee leaving you waiting?” he asked you.

“well not really, im actually here early,” you lied. 

“mind if i take a seat?” he asked, motioning to the booth seat in front of you. 

“i- uh- yeah sure?” you replied. he chuckled.

“you sound scared, i’m just taking a seat until your boyfriend gets here, someone’s got to look over the pretty ladies,” chris said flirtatiously. you let out an awkward chuckle. “so, you and minho, how did you two meet?” he asked you. you quickly tried to think of a lie.

“uh, highschool,” you answered. chris looked at you suspiciously.

“lee didn’t go to our highschool,” he stated. 

“okay well- wait what? our school?” you questioned.  he turned his head slightly.

“do you not remember me?” he started, “we were in the same home economics class.”. you sat there and thought about it. suddenly you gasped.

“bang chan?!” you exclaimed. he giggled.

“yeah, i don't go by chan anymore, just chris,” chris told you, “i actually was wondering if you’d do me a favor and keep it between us?”. you nodded.

“of course, im just embarrassed i didn’t recognize you earlier,” you told him.

“no it's okay, most people didn’t or don’t, but i was more shocked when i heard your name spring around,” he explained.

“yeah well, that makes two of us, i never expected my films to get much praise,” you replied.

“i could, i still remember that jackson guy having you edit is student president video,” he said.

“you remember that?! don't speak of my dark past,” you said. you both laughed and smiled at each other.

“could i maybe have your number? maybe we could do some good old high school reminiscing together?” chris asked. you nodded. 

“yeah of course,here hand me your phone,” you said. you took chris’ phone and typed your number when someone cleared their throat. you both looked up to minho. you handed chris back his phone. 

“bang, would you mind telling me why you’re talking to my girlfriend?” minho questioned chris.

“i was just leaving actually,” chris said, standing up from the booth. chris walked away, and minho watched as he left. minho sighed before taking a seat where chris once sat.

“he didnt do anything right?” he asked. you shook your head.

“no uh, he was just asking some basic questions about us,” you answered. minho sort of looked off for a moment, you felt like he wanted to know more, but knew he wasn’t going to ask. “anyway, you’re late, like way late,” you stated.

“i know im sorry,” he replied. you sighed.

“it’s fine i guess,” you said. minho reached for your hands across the table and lightly squeezed. something about it, despite you knowing it was an act, felt so nice. it felt, right, to be with minho at that moment, and undoubtedly minho really wasn’t that bad of a guy. he seemed to care deeply about whether or not you were comfortable with specific things or whether you were safe. but part of you just thought that it was minho being a decent human being, and you curse yourself for setting your standards in men so low. “chris seems, nice enough, why do you guys hate each other so much?” you asked. minho didnt answer.

“its not important, really,” minho began, “we just don’t mesh i guess.”. you decided not to push more. you looked up from minho, and spotted some girls a few tables down looking at you and minho. “are they looking?” he asked. you nodded. he smirked. “great, surely they’ll tell all their little friends,” he responded.

“hopefully,” you responded. 

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“you’re dating who?!” hyunjin exclaimed. you quickly shushed him. 

“not so loud jinnie, it’s still a library,” you replied, “plus i thought the rumor would have spread by now.”. 

“i mean yeah, but i just assumed it was fake, y’know never took you as minho’s type,” he stated. you sighed.

“well, uh, i am so,” you said. hyunjin wrinkled his eye brows and leaned in. 

“you’re totally fibbing,” hyunjin wh 

“pshh what?” you stated loudly. you flushed at your sudden burst before clearing your throat, “i mean, what? why would i lie about that,” you said. hyunjin chuckled and crossed his arms.

“i don’t know maybe to convince the board you have a reason to stay at miroh,” hyunjin said flatly. you sighed.

“okay,” you admitted.

“seriously?” he asked. you nodded in shame.

“but look, it’s just until stay college can view my film,” you told him. 

“now everything makes sense, the secrecy, the parties,” he started listing.

“look, but you can’t tell anyone, not even his friends know,” you explained. hyunjin zipped his lips.

“your secret is safe with me,” he stated. someone cleared their throat behind you and hyunjin, startling you both. you turned around and to your horror met eye contact with chaeryeong. 

“woah! chaer! didn’t- uh, see you there!” you said nervously.

“i heard everything,” she said softly. you looked at hyunjin terrified. 

“well, uh, y/n and i were just talking about a film she’s making right?” hyunjin lied. you nodded.

“and the film includes y/n fake dating minho?” she asked. you looked at her pleadingly.

“chaer look i can explain-”

“im not going to say anything, even if the other girls knew, we all know lia needs to get over him,” she stated.

“thank you thank you thank you!” you exclaimed.

“i actually came over to talk to you, like a friend maybe?” she asked. hyunjin looked at you warningly.

“why?” you asked.

“someone has to make sure lia doesn’t make your life a living hell, and you’re gonna need someone besides minho to have your back,” she said.

“i have her back!” hyunjin exclaimed.

“okay, but you’re a guy, she needs some girl advice,” chaeryeong said, “and you don’t exactly run with our crowd.”. hyunjin sighed.

“i suppose,” he replied dramatically.

“hyunjin you can’t ‘suppose’ things for me! but either way, what would you get out of this chaer?” you asked.

“nothing other than lia getting over minho and a cool new film friend,” she said. you thought about it, chaeryeong is a super nice girl. out of all of the girls she had the friendliest aura. 

“alright,” you said.

before you knew it, you were back in jisung’s car with minho and his other friends. chaeryeong had given you a warning about this party earlier, so it was no surprise when you received the text from minho. this party seemed even crazier just from the outside. minho gripped your hand. “promise you won’t go drinking by yourself again,” minho said. you nodded.

“i won���t,” you replied.

“love birds come on!” changbin called. the house was trashed, and there were plenty of people dry humping and making out in clear sight. you don’t know when but at some point you stood there and stared at your surroundings, and it was then you realized you had lost minho. not only minho, but changbin, jisung, nor seungmin were nowhere to be found. you quickly took out your phone to text one of the four, but a familiar voice called to you.

“y/n? lee brought you along again?” chris said. you looked up at the familiar man. you nodded.

“yeah but haven’t the slightest clue where he went this time,” you said. 

“he left a lady like you unattended?” he asked you.

“oh no! i uh, i actually left on accident and i-”

“relax, y/n, i was just messing with you,” chris told you. you chuckled nervously.

“right,” you said. chris gave you an endearing smile, which sent slight butterflies to your stomach. 

“so, you know who hosting this party?” he asked you. you shook your head. “you’d be shocked to know this is mark lee’s place,” he said. 

“mark lee still lives around here?” you asked.

“apparently, he invited me actually,” he added. 

“he was probably shocked to see bang chan with an amazing build to,” you said. you then realized what you said. “oh my god did i just say that im so sorry-” chris laughed at your mess up.

“its alright, besides, nice to know you think i have a nice build,” chris flirted. okay so maybe you knew you shouldn’t be flirting with bang chan, or chris bang or whatever everyone called him. but it couldn’t hurt right? it’s not like you and minho were actually dating. but something about him was so…relaxing. he felt like someone you could spend time with and have meaningful conversations with you. 

“y/n! there you are! we’re playing truth or dare in- oh, hello there bang,” minho said, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“truth or dare? what is this middle school?” you asked minho.

“pretty common at these parties, lee, you didn’t tell y/n about one of the traditions at mark lee’s parties?” chris asked minho. 

“well i didn’t think it was that important, some of us have other priorities than just partying, bang,” minho replied.

“ouch you really think that lowly of me, lee?” chris said, putting his hand over his heart.

“actually, bang, i would like to know why you are talking to my girlfriend,” minho stated snarkely.

“okay so truth or dare why dont we just go babe!” you told minho, calming him down before he started something. minho wrapped an arm around you, before he turned the two of you away from chris. minho leaned into your ear.

“i wouldn’t hang around him much, y/n, not unless you’re with one of us,” minho told you.

“why he seems alright?” you replied confused.

“just take my word for it,” minho said. you sighed. soon you found yourself ina room surrounded by a mixture of people you’d met and not met, and of course lia and her friends were there. you made eye contact with chaeryeong and grinned. “alright why dont we get started,” minho announced to the room. you and minho took a seat next to each other on a couch. 

“minho you didn’t tell me your lady was y/n,” mark lee said.

“hello to you again mark,” you replied.

“you know mark lee?” minho asked you. you nodded.

“don’t worry about it,” you stated. for once minho didn’t push for more info, and the game began. it was a typical drinking game with the occasional sexual request. honestly, it seemed everyone in the room had forgotten you’d existed until it got to mark.

“so y/n and minho, you two are an item, right?” mark asked. 

“yes,” minho answered.

“but yet i’ve yet to see you two have any action like you and lia,” mark told minho.

“why should we have to?” minho asked.

“i’m just saying maybe you don’t like y/n that much,” mark stated. ouch. okay maybe you weren’t actually dating but that did tang your feelings a bit.

“mark, me and y/n are none of your business,” minho said.

“besides we don’t need to flaunt that we like each other to everyone,” you retorted. 

“then why don’t you prove it?” mark asked.

“what? lee this is obviously ridiculous,” minho said. 

“no i don’t think so,” lia added, “you and i had our fun didnt we?”. lia looked at you after saying this.

“y/n i dare you to get on minho’s lap and make out with him,” mark told you.

“mark why are you so obs-”

“alright,” you replied confidently. you got up from your seat before draping yourself on top of minho. you leaned your head in and touched his forehead. minho looked at you with shocked eyes.

“are you sure?” he wh you nodded, and as soon as you gave him permission, minho wrapped his arms around your shoulders and leaned in to kiss you. everyone in the roomed seemed to ‘ooh’ and ‘ahh’ but honestly you drowned it out. minho took the lead, and even wrapped his arms around your waist. minho dominated you completely. unconsciously, you grinded against minho’s abdomen, feeling a surge of excitement down below. minho slowly pulled his face back. without realizing it you whispered softly:

“wow,”. suddenly you stood up and took your seat next to minho.

♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ・。゜♥｡ﾟ♡ﾟ

finally the night seemed over, and minho was driving you home. “y/n, have you ever done that before?” he asked you.

“done what?” you asked back.

“you know…making out,” he stated. you blushed a little bit.

“um, no,” you replied. minho inhaled sharply.

“y/n…have you ever kissed anyone before?” he implored. you paused before answering. 

“i uh well i-”

“don’t tell me i was your first kiss,” minho said.

“i won’t then,” you replied.

“y/n,” he said, “you could have said no.”.

“its okay! it was just a kiss right? i mean im not 15 anymore minho,” you told him. minho bit the inside of his cheek. you could tell something about this had bothered him. you weren’t so sure why, it’s not like minho had that much of a conscience anyway. 

“well you also said at the begining of this no kissing,” he sreplied.

“we were in a circumstance where it was needed,” you said. honestly, you had forgotten there were rules to this arrangement. you didnt want to say it out loud, but you’d grown used to the arrangement. used to people calling you minho’s girlfriend, or vise versa depending on the person. 

there was one rule that was bothering you. you’d never had sex. like period. masturbation, maybe, but you never really tried it. once you got home that night you tossed and turned, possibly trying to sleep, but you could only think about minho’s lips. you feel slightly ashamed to be having this naughty thoughts, secretly wishing minho would trace his hands down your body. and as you started to imagine, you found yourself copying these actions. minho using his lips to gentle kiss down your body until finally reaching your aching core and then- you heard a knock at your door. you got up, flushed a little from what you were about to do, and left your bedroom. you opened the door to see minho. “minho what are you doing here?” you asked him.

“i don’t think we should do this anymore,” he told you. 

“wait what? why?” you asked.

“it’s gone too far,” he said, “you’re breaking the rules you set for my own gain, plus we’ve yet to do anything that will benefit you.”. you thought for a moment about what minho was saying.

“you promised me two months, the board hasn’t even changed their mind about my funds,”  you stated, “plus if you want to do something for me, we can go to the film fair tomorrow, our school is hosting it.”.

“are you serious?!” he exclaimed excitedly. 

“yeah it’s whatever, i can just uninvite hyunjin,” you said, “plus the head of the film department will be there, surely seeing us will make some sort of change.”. minho grinned.

“great,” he said.

you waiting for minho’s text saying he was outside the next day. the film fair was one of your favorite events of the year, before the whole holding back your funds thing. it was a great time to get feedback and other techniques from fellow directors. originally you were going to take hyunjin, you guys typically went every year, but you figured taking minho with you this one time would not be too big of a deal.

[minnie: im outside

you smiled at the message before stepping out and getting into his car. “is this outfit okay?” he asked you. you chuckled. “what?” he asked.

“it’s just here you are asking me if what you’re wearing is appropriate for a film fair,” you repleid.

“i’ve - uh, i’ve never been to one,” he admitted. 

“obviously, stop being so nervous it’s just like going to a festival,” you assured him. 

“hey don’t make fun of me!” he pouted.

“okay mr. popular, let’s get to the fair,” you said. the fair was as busy as ever, and a part of you was excited to just show minho around. you led him to the screening theatre, where you watched many films, but one in particular played that seemed to change the vibe between you two. film was art, and often directors and script writers include things from personal lives, what you weren’t expecting was for a sex scene to begin playing. minho glanced over at you, biting his lip slightly before turning back. you were incredibly focused on the camera angles and how the director was able to get a cinematic look at the scene, but minho could only be reminded of last night. he assumed you just didn’t noticed how much making out with you affected him, he fought back a lot of impulses to just pin you down right then and there. the thought of you unconsciously grinding against him desperately turned him on in a way he’d never been before. the thought of how unknowing you were when it came to relationships was attractive to minho in a way, it was almost like he could corrupt you by himself. “minho?” you called. minho shook his head from his thoughts.

“yeah?” he asked.

“i’m sorry, is this boring?” you replied.

“no! no! i was just spacing out, you know,” he answered. you got up and grabbed his hand.

“let’s go see other things! plus i need to make sure we’re seen by the other professors!” you exclaimed. minho nodded and gripped your hand back, following you. the two of you were walking around the festival until you were stopped by another student holding a camera. 

“could i snap a photo of you two? it’s for the school’s newspaper,” the student requested. you turned your head towards minho who nodded that it was alright. 

“sure!” you answered. 

“alright now pose!” he told you and minho. you leaned your head towards minho as the picture was taken. “hmm, i'm not sure if this is the shot i’m looking for, could we maybe be a bit more romantic, like maybe a kiss or something?” he asked. you looked at minho nervously.  minho saw your worried look.

“uh, maybe not,” he answered.

“c’mon! just a peck on the cheek?” the photographer asked. 

“okay,” you answered, without really asking minho beforehand.

“alright now 3-” you closed your eyes, getting ready to give minho a peck on the cheek. “2-” you leaned in, “1!” expecting to feel minho’s cheek against your lips, instead you met minho’s lips. the two of you looked at each other with wide eyes before quickly pulling away from each other. “aww, now that’s a cute one! thanks you two!” the photographer said, quickly walking away from the two of you, probably so you couldn’t deny the picture being used. 

“y/n- i’m so sor-”

“miss l/n!” a professor called. not just any professor, but your film super visor. dr. han was the main person in charge of whether or not you could get funds for your big film. 

“oh hi there dr. han! fancy seeing you, the film advisor, at our local college film festival,” you said awkwardly, knowing he just witnessed you and minho’s accidental kiss a second ago.

“yes, fancy it is miss l/n..i was rather surprised you didn’t submit a film this time around,” dr. han commented. bullshit. he knows exactly why. 

“oh i’m just saving up for film equipment!” you said. minho looked at dr. han and back at you. minho had only really heard rumors about dr. han and how strict and intimidating he is. he also could see through dr. han’s bullshit as well as you could. it was pretty obvious there was a hint of tension between you and the professor. and not the good, sexual, kind. the kind that was between him and chris kind of tension. 

“and who’s this that you’re with?” dr. han asked.

“oh this is-”

“lee minho, y/n’s boyfriend! so night to meet you dr. han, y/n has told me so much about how you’ve helped her and her films!” minho interjected. dr. han looked at minho suspiciously.

“ah yes, mr. lee, i believe i’ve heard some students mention you two are new item,” the professor said to minho. minho didn’t like dr. han. he decided this right there. why would  a professor be so invested in rumors around the college? minho put his arm around you and laughed awkwardly.

“yeah, i guess we have been pretty open about our relationship, right y/n?” minho asked you.

“yeah, sorry you had to see me in such a casual way professor,” you apologized.

“oh its no problem, students should be free to…express however they want,” dr. han said. there was an awkward silence that followed his sentence.

“well, minho and i have other film festival things to see, it was nice seeing you dr. han!” you said, taking minho’s arm off your shoulder, and grabbing it to walk away. 

“that’s the ass that’s withholding your funds?” minho asked. you sighed.

“yeah, but he’s probably the one guy i have to get through to get my funds. so it’s priority that he knows we’re dating. thank you for the save,” you told him, “either way is there anything else you’d like to see, i come to this festival like every year so.”. 

“what’s your favorite thing at this festival?” minho asked you. you thought about your answer for a bit.

“okay, its boring though,” you answered.

“i don’t care,” he said. you smiled, you realized you were still holding minho’s arm, and let go. 

“okay follow me!” you exclaimed

♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ・。゜♥｡ﾟ♡ﾟ

you took your id out of your bag, and used it against the photo lab’s door. “this isn’t apart of the festival,” minho commented.

“no, but since everyone is at the festival no one is gonna come in here, also it’s so much quieter in here,” you replied, opening the door to the dark room. the two of you walked in and minho let out a quiet ‘wow’. you looked at the slight red rays against minho’s face with a smile while he stood astonished at the room.

“what is this place?” he asked. 

“dark room, it’s used to process film,” you answered. minho looked at all the processing images around him, before turning back to you. you walked over to a clear empty table, typically used to set your things down before doing anything else in the room. you pushed your self up before taking a seat. “i love this place, i mean i don’t think i’ve used it since freshman year, and since the first award winning film i made,” you said, “i’m sorry i’m talking too much aren’t i, i’ll just-”

“no no! i-,” minho started, “i like hearing what you like.”. minho stood in front of you, the two of you staring into each other's eyes. you hadn’t noticed it before, but his eyes were this almost black tone, which made the lights reflecting off of them look like mini stars. there was a silence between you two, it was comfortable though. minho brought a hand up to your cheek and rubbed his thumb against it. 

“minho,” you called. he hummed, removing his hand, but you quickly reach for it to go back. his skin was incredibly soft for a college man, let alone one like minho who you assumed couldn’t have a skin routine. you rubbed your thumb across his hand before he put his forehead against yours.

“can i kiss you?” he whispered.

“please,” you answered. and for the first time, minho kissed you. not like for show, but really kissed you. this kiss felt different, it was definitely real, but it was also heavy. eventually this one kiss turned into another, and then another, until finally the two of you were making out. you spread your legs, allowing minho to stand between them as he continued kissing you. minho eventually moved from your lips to your neck, and the sudden contact made you let out a mewl. he pulled back.

“is this okay, y/n?” he asked. 

“more than okay, please just- don’t stop,” you begged. minho smirked, hearing your request turned minho on more than he’d like to admit. his demeanor changed from an intimate one to a much darker, and sexier one. he began to suck on different parts of your neck, above your collarbone, under your jaw, your jaw line, really anywhere he could. “min please,” you said. he stopped kissing, and looked directly into your eyes. the once star filled eyes were full of determination and want.

“please what baby?” he asked. the low tone of his voice when he said the pet name sent electricity immediately down to your core.

“please more,” you said. minho chuckled as he reached for the hem of your shirt. you lifted our arms up, allowing him to easily take it off. he placed a kiss on your forehead. 

“aww pretty baby, has anyone ever seen you like this?” he questioned. you shook your head. he pressed his lips on your chest, just above your breasts. 

“no one, just you minnie,” you told him. he pampered your chest and collarbone area in kisses. 

“you’re so innocent baby,” minho commented. you groaned at what he said. “what? am i wrong?” he joked with you. he then started kissing your stomach and lower abdomen. you could feel yourself getting hotter. 

“minho please touch me,” you requested.

“touch you where?” he asked. you whined.

“you know where please,” you continued. he smirked, and grabbed your cheek.

“here?”, you shook your head, he moved his hand to your chest, “maybe here?”, you once again shook your head, and in response minho for once moved his hands to your inner thighs, “here baby?” but before you could answer, minho moved your skirt up and made contact with your clothed core, “is this where you want minnie to touch you?” he asked. you nodded. he chuckled again, and started rubbing gentle circles around your panties. “i bet you’ve thought about this,” he started, “you’ve touched yourself wishing it was my hand haven’t you, y/n.”. you nodded to minho’s statement. you subconsciously began to grind against his hand and minho brought his other hand to your shoulders. “patience baby, minnie will make you feel all sorts of good, you just need to wait,” he told you. you whined. he then moved his hands to the sides of your hip and gently pulled down your panties. “you’re so wet for me y/n,” he said, suddenly bringing a finger between the lips of your pussy. he rubbed up and down before circling your clit. 

“min,” you moaned.

“what?” he asked. 

“please put those inside of me please,” you begged. minho smiled.

“so demanding for someone who's never done this before,” he said.

“minho i need you please,” you told him. minho gentle moved the same finger circling your clit into your pussy. you moaned at the contact immediately, this felt way better than your own fingers. minho set a steady pace before his thumb began rubbing you clit. “fuck-” you let out.

“does it feel good baby?” he asked you.

“yes-s-so good,” you answered him. 

“good girl, your hole is so tight, do you think it could take another finger?” he asked. you nodded urgently. minho added another finger, this time his movements speeding up. it was embarrassing to you, as you felt an oh too familiar knot form in your stomach. you instinctively began grinding against his hand. upon noticing this, he removed his hand from your pussy. he then put both fingers in his mouth and let them out with a pop. you whined at the sight.

“h-hey! why did you stop?” you asked. 

“because i want to taste your cum first hand,” he answered. the statement sent shivers down your entire body. just his fingers alone had you cumming after mere minutes, the idea of his tongue exploring your entire private had your heart beating at a million miles a minute. minho wrapped his arms around your back, and pulled you forward on the table. he then leaned in and kissed you passionately,even sucking on your bottom lip before letting go. “are you ready?” he asked you. you nodded eagerly. minho then got on his knees and used his hands on your inner thighs to spread you out some more.”stay still for me baby,” he told you. you nodded. minho then dived straight into it, lapping your lower lips.he sucked on your clit,causing you let out an embarrassingly loud moan from how good it felt. minho’s tongue then entered your entrance, and licked our walls surrounding it. once again, it wasn’t long before you came on minho’s tongue. 

“fuck minho oh my god i’m so sorry-”

“no don't apologize, that was so hot baby,” he assured you. he pulled your panties back up, and you grabbed his arm.

“minho please i want to make you feel good too,” you told him.

“y/n, you really don’t have to, i don’t want to take all your first time’s away from you,” he said. you used both your hands to grab his right hand.

“please minho, please let me suck your cock,” you begged. 

“fuck y/n, you’re so intoxicating,” minho admitted. minho gently picked you up off of the table and made you stand against the table. he then unbuttoned his pants, and unzipped his zipper. you easily sunk down to be at level with his member, and pulled his boxers down releasing his erected cock. you looked back up at minho as you wrapped your hand around his shaft. “don’t look at me like that,” minho said to you.

“like what?” you asked.

“like you’re waiting for my permission,” he answered. 

“no i’m not i just…i don’t really know what to do,” you admitted. minho brushed his hand through is hair.

“okay, i’ll teach you,” he told you, “first grab it with both your hands, but not too tight, okay baby?”. you nodded, and moved your hands accordingly. he hissed at the contact of your hands and his member. “now start moving back and forth,” he instructed. you then followed suit, starting at a slow but steady pace. minho let out a breathy moan. you movd you hands up and down minho’s shaft for a few moments before he lightly pushed you away. 

“what happened?” you asked him.

“y/n…i’m sorry i can’t do this to you, not now at least,” he told you. you putted lightly.

“why not?” you replied.

“you need to have your first time with someone you actually like, not just someone like me,” he explained. he got up, zipped his pants before holding your right hand gesturing you to get up from your knees. “c’mon, let me drop you off,” he said. you shook your head.

“nah i uh, i’ll stay here a little while, you can go, i’ll catch a ride from hyunjin or the bus,” you added. he nodded. 

“text me when you get home okay?” he asked. you nodded, and with that you watch minho leave you in the dark room, with all the processing photos there to watch minho walk away from you.

♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ・。゜♥｡ﾟ♡ﾟ

by all accounts,everything that happened the day before felt wrong, but minho couldn’t quite understand why. he’d messed around with girls since he started college and felt nothing. he messed around with lia for a while and honestly, he wished he could feel guilt. but you were different. the thing about sex to minho is that it has lost all meaning to him. with you, it almost felt better, like there was some true feelings behind it. it scared him in a way. he’d never really felt this way about anyone before. sure he’s had girlfriends, and sure he’s had sex, but with you, he secretly hoped this fake dating thing could possibly be a forever thing. the truth is though, that he knows it has to end eventually. and he’s terrified that if anything more happened yesterday you’d turn into all the other girls he’d fucked. he’d get what he wanted from your body, and then you’d be uninterested, or worse he’d be uninterested. he liked the way his stomach felt when he saw you. he liked the way you talked passionately about films and their directors. he liked that you showed him a secret room that you went to for tranquility. he liked you. maybe even more than that, but he’d never voice that. not when he knows you don’t feel the same way. you would never like someone like minho. aside from your reputation of being a film director, those who had spoken to you could attest that you weren’t just someone that casually dated. infact he can’t remember if you’d even mentioned dating someone before. oh god. you haven’t dated before. minho is all you’ve ever known. and he knows he’s not the greatest option-

“hello, earth to minho?” jisung said. minho shook his head free of his thoughts. 

“what were you talking about?” he asked his friend. jisung sighed.

“you’ve been like this all day, what’s going on?” jisung asked.

“oh nothing,” minho lied.

“is it something with y/n? i know you’re not used to these kinds of situations,” jisung told him. minho shook his head.

“no it’s nothing, really,” minho insisted, “just class work.”. jisung looked at minho, as if he knew minho was lying. jisung chose to move on from the topic knowing minho would  probably not tell him anything more.

“well anyway, lia is hosting a party tonight, it’s gonna be a big deal, and she wanted me to tell you you were free to go,” jisung repeated.

“cool, i’ll tell y/n, she’ll love to experience something other than bang’s parties,” minho said.

“i don’t know, lia didn’t mention if you could bring y/n,” jisung replied.

“well i’m bringing her anyway,” minho stated. he opened his phone to text you, but he suddenly remembered his thoughts from earlier. in the past sending you a text was simple but now he’s self-aware of every word he uses to send you a message. he would start typing, only to have to retype the message.

you jumped at the sound of your text notification going off. you hate to admit it, but you’d been waiting all day for minho to text you. after last night's events you’ve had a lot of thoughts. to be honest your main concern was whether or not minho would end your deal. but you couldn’t end the deal, you’ve yet to receive an email about your funds and i mean that was totally the only reason. not because you feared the two of you would never talk again after the deal.

[minho: there’s a party at lia’s…are you good with going?

[y/n: yeah totally! what time would you pick me up?

[minho: probably 8ish

you glanced at the clock. it was 1, which meant you had  7 hours. 7 hours was enough time to talk to chaeryeong before hand.

♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ・。゜♥｡ﾟ♡ﾟ

you were on your own. chaeryeong responded to your text saying she was cramming that night for a test tomorrow. minho and you entered together but he was quickly distracted by his friends and other party activities. “oh hey y/n,” a female voice called. you recognized the voice to be yeji’s, another one of lia’s friends that you’ve met before.

“uh, hi,” you answered.

“minho leave you lonely again?” she asked you.

“oh, no, i just prefer navigating these things on my own,” you lied. you couldn’t let these girls see that they were getting to you. you made a promise to yourself that you wouldn’t let that happen. 

“you should join us, lia is having some select people to play some drinking games in her guest room, you should join,” she told you. your initial reaction was to say no, but the thought of pissing lia off was very appealing. you smiled.

“yeah lead the way,” you replied. yeji led you upstairs to the room this drinking game was being played. once you reached the room you immediately noticed that minho was nowhere to be found. everyone sat in a circle, a beer bottle in the center. you’ve seen enough movies to know what this is. someone spins the bottle and the two on the ends end up doing something. yeji handed you a shot glass.

“it’s fireball, trust me, this game is a lot more fun when you’re drunk,” she told you. she also appeared to have a shot, but she was waiting for you to drink yours. you were a tiny bit hesitent, but a shot surely couldn’t hurt? you quickly then took the shot. it was probably the grossest and strongest thing you’ve tasted, but after the unnecessary anxiety the past couple of days, you culdn’t lie that the rush of alchohol felt nice. yeji and you sat in the circle before another friend of their’s, yuna, was in th center.

“let’s stat the game shall we?” yuna asked. the room cheered as she set her hand on the empty beer bottle. 

a couple rounds had passed, and by the grace of god, you had yet to go. you had learned that the punishment was for the two people on the ends of the bottle had to make out for at least a minute. you felt a little tipsy from the shot earlier, but nothing more. suddenly, lia appeared in the center and said, “seeing as it’s my party, i think i have a right to spin the bottle,”. you knew this could not be good. lia spun the bottle and as the bottle spun “mysteriously” her foot tapped the glass, leading you to be one of the players. “oops!” lia said. you looked up and met eyes with chris. oh thank god. you had made your way over to him, and boldly sat on his lap. it felt wrong. i mean it’s not like you and minho were really dating right? it’s not cheating right? but that didn’t matter. you were determined to prove lia wrong. about what, you didn’t know but this gme was now in your court. 

“y/n you-”

“shh,” you cut chris off, “it’s just a game right?”. you smashed your lips against his, not quite sure how to make out you sort of tried sucking on chris’ bottom lip as minho sucked on yours merely 24 hours ago. tons of squeals, and ooo’s and ahh’s were heard until they abruptly ended by a dead silence. you broke the kiss only to see minho was right beside you, and suddenly he threw a hard punch at chris, pushing chris backwards. 

“this is some stupid game, lia, grow the fuck up and get over it. i’m not leaving y/n. especially not for you. and bang, keep your hands to yourself and think twice before touching my girlfriend ever again.” minho stated coldly. minho grabbed your hand, sort of forcing you to stand up. “we’re leaving. let’s go, babe,” he said, leading you out of the room. 

♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ・。゜♥｡ﾟ♡ﾟ

the car ride back to your apartment was silent. you felt bad. you hadn’t thought it was personal, honestly, but you felt bad. minho put his car in park as he found a space at your apartments. “minho i-” you were quickly cut off by his lips pressed against yours. this kiss was very different from the warm and heavy from the day before, this one was needy and demanding. you kissed back, of course, and attempted to continue the kiss, but minho let go. 

“god you are so insatiable, do you know that?” he told you, “do you know how badly it’s taking everything in me not to just devour you right here, right now.”.

“then do it,” you stated. minho sighed.

“i can’t,” he said.

“why not?”

“becuase it’s you..”

“what’s that supposed to mean? is there something wrong with me?”

“no and thats the problem!”

“i’m not following,”

“do i need to spell it out for you, y/n?”

“maybe?”

“i like you. like like you. this isn’t fake to me anymore.” he admitted. a silence flooded the car. he sighed and leaned his head against the head rest. “i like you, y/n, and you don’t have to feel the same way, we can end this now if you want. i broke my own damn rule,” he said. you wereat a loss of words. maybe because a boy has never confessed to you like this, hell a boy has never confessed to you. “i’m sor-”

“i mean the rule was that i can’t fall for you, not that you couldn’t fall for me,” you said. minho laughed.

“okay whatever, can you please say something back to my confession that’s serious,” he asked.

“oh, oh, i like you too minho. i guess i broke your rule,” you replied. minho chuckled.

“i think this is the most awkward confession i’ve experienced, now can i please kiss you, as your boyfriend?” he asked.

“i mean you were already-” minho cut you off with a hushed kiss. this kiss was like the first, warm, sweet, genuine. he tried to pull away, but you wrapped your arms around his neck. he began to kiss somewhat harsher, demandingly. you could feel yourself become aroused just by his kiss. minho let go.

“i need to have you, baby,” he said. you nodded and the two of you got out of his car. as soon as you were inside your apartment, minho pressed you against the door, pressing his lips against yours harsher than before. he grabbed both of your wrists and held them above your head as he continued to kiss you, eventually kiss your shoulders and your neck and underneath your jaw. “i need you to tell me you’re okay with this, because once i start i will not stop unless you say a safe word,” he told you.

“safe word?” you asked.

“its a word you’ll say if you’re ever uncomfortable and we need to stop,” he answered.

“bunny?” you said.

“perfect,” he replied, before undoing your pant buttons. he rubbed your core through your panties, and you let out a whimper. “what’s wrong baby?” he asked.

“i need you,” you said.

“fuck, y/n, you cannot just be saying that or else i’ll need to fuck you right here,” he replied. you whined at his statement. “what? is something wrong?” he asked, genuinely.

“no, nothing is wrong it’s just, you’re so hot,” you told him.

“such a desperate little baby, getting turned on just by my words,” he said, “i’m going to make you my little baby, you’d like that wouldn’t you? would you like to be minnie’s little cum whore?”. he then put his hand down your panties, rubbing his pointer finger over your clit. 

“f-fuck,” you let out in a whisper. 

“i know you like my fingers more than that, be loud for me baby,” minho instructed. suddenly he inserted two of his fingers into your core. he moved at a steady pace, one that wasn’t too fast or too slow. “god you’re so tight,” he commented to himself. 

“m-min i-i’m-”

“don’t.” he told you, “trust me i can feel how tight you are, but tonight i want you cum on something else.”.

“wh-what?” you said. minho removed his fingers from your dripping cunt. minho picked you up and walked towards your bedroom. he sat you on the edge, took off your pants and panties, then, grabbing your  thighs he pushed your core to his face and immediately began lapping at your pussy. you brought your hands down to grip minho’s locks as he went down on you. “minnie oh shit– that feels so good,” you said. he huffed against you as a response. suddenly, you felt fingers entering you again, this time at a much faster rate. you felt like this was cloud 9. nothing could feel better than this moment. “min- i-i can’t hold it anymore please,” you begged. minho suddenly pushed away, and ou whined at the loss of contact. he pulled down his pants and you could see his length through his boxers. it was practically begging to be freed. minho ran his fingers through his hair. 

“do you have any condoms?” he asked you. you remembered you had a few in your drawer, some for safe keeping. minho walked towards your bed side drawer and took the condom out. he ripped it open and pulled down his boxers. his member sprung, and seemed to be slightly wet from his own pre-cum. he pumped himself a few times before he put on the condom. he then came back and leaned over you. “are you sure you’re okay with this?” he asked. you nodded your head. you took your right hand and gently held his cheek.

“more sure than i’ve ever been,” you answered. and with that, minho took your hand and held it, intertwining your hands.

“alright, now this may hurt a little baby, but i promise i’ll make you feel so good. please just say your safe word if you want to stop.”. you nodded. minho rubbed his member between your lips, using your wetness as lube. he then aligned himself to your opening, and slowly inserted himself in. you squeezed minho’s hand at the slightest pinch you felt from his cock entering you. minho slowly inserted himself inch by inch, until finally he bottomed out, causing him to let out a moan. “god your pussy is amazing, are you okay sweetheart?” he asked.

“yes minnie,” you started, you could feel yourself clench all of the sudden, “please move.”.

“of course, i’m gonna use this pussy as my personal pocket,” he answered you. he then brought himself out before entering again. minho began to thrust, each pump getting faster than the last. “g-god you’re tighter than i though, i could use your cunt all day,” he stated. you moaned at the thought causing minho to chuckle. “you like that huh? you want to be minnies little fuck toy?” he said. 

“y-yes please, just, don’t stop this feels so good,” you managed to let out. minho began a steady pace, similar to his fingers that was in between fast and slow. “min i feel it-”

“thats alright baby, cum on my cock. show minnie how good you feel, my sweet.” he said. you felt yourself unravel, letting out some curses and versions of minhos name. it wasn’t too long before minho came as well, cumming inside of his condom.

♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ・。゜♥｡ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡･ﾟ♡ﾟ･｡♥｡

when you woke up, you felt the warmth of minho’s arms around you. he smirked. “goodmorning sweetheart,” he said. you yawned.

“have you been watching me sleep?” you asked.

“don’t ruin the moment!” he said, “i just wanted to look at my perfect girlfriend.”. you loved hearing that come out of his mouth, genuinely. you snuggled yourself into his chest.

“i could just lay with you all day,” you said.

“is that so?” he replied. you nodded.

“i’m being so serious,” you repled. minho ran his fingers through your hair. 

“do you think you’ll get the funds to your film now?” he asked you.

“i’m not sure, not unless you released our sex tape publicly, but in that case it better not have been for free,” you answered. minho laughed, and you listened to the way his voice sounded with your ear pressed to his chest. 

a/n: i hoped you enjoyed it!! <3 thankss for reading.