#plussizepregnany

[ilive2worshipyou]

Thoughts

Every time I get on here I say its been a minute since I have wrote on here, & that’s just because life has been so busy & crazy lately!  I am currently a little over 21 weeks pregnant & my Husband & I are over the moon excited that in about 4 ish months, our sweet baby Ethan will be here in our arms!  Having a baby is something that we have prayed & prayed about!  My nerves are always so on edge right now just worrying that I am not doing something right or that the littlest thing I do could harm our baby.  These last 2 weeks or so I have had a couple scares!  Mainly with the amniotic fluid around the baby.  First it was low, then the next day it was fine.  I went for an ultrasound a week later & they said it was low so my OB sent me to a high risk OB, where they said it looked fine.  It’s been such a roller coaster.  Then the next day after going to the high risk OB, I leaked (only one time) a clear fluid down my leg & got all worried.  Went to get checked, which everything turned out to be okay.  It’s just been crazy!  I just want to give birth to our perfect baby boy without any complications.  

I feel like I need to be doing more to prepare for the baby.  We aren’t turning my Husband’s office into the nursery until late August.  The baby will be in our room anyways for the first few months in his bassinet, & since my Husband uses his office literally all the time, we don’t want to take it away just yet!  We aren’t really even taking it away!  We are splitting the room 60/40 & giving Ethan the bigger half!  Still, we may start on it a little sooner than August because I feel like I need to be doing more to prepare.

Fast forward 2 days

I am really bad about finishing a post!  Sometimes it takes a few days.  So I logged onto Instagram last night & seen a celebrity that I follow lost her baby at 20 weeks.  Her & her Husband went in at her 20 week appointment for her anatomy scan & to find out the gender of their precious baby, & there was no heartbeat!  This absolutely breaks my heart.  No matter if someone is 5 weeks pregnant or 20 weeks pregnant, it hurts just as much!  I feel like just by reading this, my anxiety goes up tremendously.  I am about to be 22 weeks pregnant in 2 days & I know that anything can happen at anytime to my sweet baby boy!  I pray to God every single day that he keep him safe inside my womb & that I can continue to have a safe pregnancy & delivery a healthy baby boy!  My Husband & I have wanted this for so very long & we over halfway there.  November is not too far away, yet it seems like forever!  I am just ready to have my sweet boy in my arms!  He is so loved already.  I am just taking it one day at a time & trying to make sure I do everything I possibly can do to remain healthy & do more to stay healthy.  

Now, I am off to spend time with our family for Independence Day.  Family is the most important thing to me!  

<3

[half-deity]

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november 1st // 27 weeks.

-

hi my little el,

my pregnancy app says you’re

the size of a fennec fox today.

but your constant, strong

movements make it feel as

though you are much bigger.

you’re supposed to arrive in

just 13 weeks.. my birthday.

but we know you’re going to

want to arrive much sooner.

i’ve become so impatient at

times with having to wait for you.

i just want you here.

to see your beautiful face.

to see how much you look like

your big brother and sister.

i can’t wait to hold you in my

arms and tell you how much

i love you.

to kiss your cheeks, and hold

your tiny hands in mine.

i just can’t wait to meet you. 🖤

@maxsyn666 ⚰️🖤⚰️