#ptyy mag

[petertingle-yipyip]

WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE

one - deja vu

tags: n/a two // masterlist // MAD AT GOD (DD CANON)

welcome back to the MAG universe! this time around we are rolling through the Punisher series. i’m so excited to develop her friendship with Frank and see what happens between her and Billy!

Pairing: Billy x Reader (casual), Frank x Reader (platonic)

Word Count: 5, 728

Summary: Being back in the Kitchen almost immediately pulls her back into a fight. But without Matt, what has she become?

You moved over quickly, using Luke as footing to jump from after he knocked her into a short spin so she faced away from you. You moved in a fluid motion to connect the wires between your wrists as you hooked one leg over her shoulders and jammed the other against her spine. You leaned forward enough to get the wire across her throat before you dropped to land on your feet.

She was quick to flip her sai in her grip and slam it through your thigh. Your leg buckled and she used the chance to free herself, spinning to slam her foot against the side of your head. You fell to your back with a wet thump and you pushed to your elbows, craning your neck to see her weapon skewering your thigh. The red stained tip poked through and any movement sent a sharp pain through your body, eminating deep within your bone. She dared to move closer and you kicked the opposing foot against her chest.

Once that foot landed back on the ground, the pain on the other side made you cry out. You managed to drag yourself to your feet and stood unsteadily, hopping on your good leg to try and maintain balance. You reached awkwardly behind yourself for your staffs, having to connect them quickly and use them as a cane for the moment.

“You’ll die down here with us.” Elektra’s voice taunted you, though she was no where to be seen. “As you should.”

You hobbled in a small circle while you tried to find where the voice was coming from. But there was no one, not even the ghost of footsteps or shuffles to give her away. The rest of your group was gone, as if they never came down with you. Not even the elevator.

Hadn’t they just been there?

The tunnels around you stretched as far as you could see, dripping and collecting small puddles. Your labored breathing filled the silence between drips and you felt something eerily out of place about the whole thing.

“Come on then.” You challenged weakly. A deep breathe before you screamed into the wet darkness. “Come out and kill me!”

“Y/N.” He said calmly and you spun so fast you nearly slipped in the water. But when you glanced down to find your footing, you were in a puddle of blood. All of the water had turned to blood. You closed your eyes tightly and shook your head, assuming it was your own mania creeping in, but when you opened them the sight hadn’t changed.

“This is what you wanted.” He used the same eerily calm tone, even as the ground shook beneath your feet.

“You should’ve left.” You said angrily as the drips began to land on your forehead. “You shouldn’t be here, Matt.”

“Then why didn’t you keep him safe?” Elektra appeared at his side, walking around him like a predator taunting her prey. Her fingers trailed along the back of his shoulders.

But even in the dim light, neither of them looked like themselves. They were soaking wet and it looked it was water on their bodies, but it reflected red once it hit the ground. Their skins were tinted blue, cyanotic to match their puffy lips and swollen bodies. Their eyes were hollow, sunken in and hardly even there. Everytime their mouths open, blood spilled. They looked like corpses that had been left at the bottom of the river for months to decay in silence.

“I tried.” You answered but the sound barely registered.

Your eye suddenly stung and when you reached to wipe it, your hand came back with fresh red blood. The scar above your eye, the deep gash your mask left from your fight with Fisk, was now fresh and seeping into your eye. The scar on your cheekbone stained the lower half of your face. Your chest snapped and the cartilage fell loose and the old cracks in your ribs fell open. One by one, old injuries became fresh again and each one felt like a hit to your stamina, to your strength, until you fell back to your knees.

Elektra appeared in front of you now, reaching with a sadistic smile for her sai that still dripped with your blood. You tried to back away but landed against Matt, who moved quickly to pin you to the ground. You struggled against him, but he leaned more of his weight against you and left you flailing and kicking.

“Matt? Matt, what are you doing?” You said in a panic but your own blood filled your mouth.

Elektra twisted the weapon in your leg and you screamed out, a gurggled sound that nearly choked you. You kicked your other foot at her but it moved through her, as if she was never really there.

“You’ll die. Painfully.” She threatened before a second sai appeared in her hands.

She climbed over your body, knees on either side of your ribs as she lined her weapon with the center of your chest. By then you were crying, hair sticking to your face and thrashing your body under her weight. But she didn’t move. Matt didn’t move. Instead, they offered each other wicked smiles before both looking down at you.

“You could’ve saved me, Y/N/N… Why didn’t you?” Matt asked.

You opened your mouth to answer but before your voice could find you, Elektra’s weapon began to press into your chest.

Breaking the skin earned a whine.

Her jamming the heel of her hand against it to break through your sternum drew a groan.

Her slow, intentional pressure against your heart earned a plead.

“I can fix this.” You tried, barely a whisper above the shattering thuds of collapsing rock.

“If you could’ve…” She said lowly, leaning forward to meet your panicked eyes, dripping blood from her lips. “You would’ve already.”

Your eyes went wide at the wet sound of the sai piercing your heart.

———————————————————————————————————————

You shot up in your bed and a hand instantly moved to your cheek. The skin was clear of blood but covered in a layer of sweat. You felt above your brow and found the same. With a small noise of stress, you threw your comforter back and shuffled to the bathroom. A hand was rubbing the center of your chest, haunted by the tip of Elektra’s weapon.

You flipped the light, squinting through it for a minute until your eyes adjusted. You planted both hands against the countertop and leaned in to see the faint lines of scars around your eye. The subtle discolorations that followed the shape of your mask, permanent memories of your time as a vigilante, of that hole deep inside you that you couldn’t quite fill. Quantico had done very little towards that gaping feeling, that hole somewhere too deep for you reach that felt like it would swallow you everyday.

You thought that FBI training, getting away from the Kitchen, would maybe be good for you. It’d be time to breathe, maybe even grieve. But those words didn’t seem to mean anything to you anymore. It just felt like they were adding to that depth, sucking out any remnants of progress you had made.

Maybe coming home wasn’t going to be any better.

You blew out a sigh and splashed your face with cold water, a contrast to the heat that seemed to live in your blood now. You felt warm, everywhere you went. No matter the temperature outside, you were boiling inside. But if someone were to touch your skin, they’d never know.

That was who you were now. Not Y/N. Not even Exodus. You were someone else. Someone with Y/N’s memories and tendencies, with Exodus’ mania and skills, but other things were left unaccounted for. Who’s morals did you maintain? Who’s relationships were important?

Who’s heart beat in your chest? Who’s blood was in your veins?

But if you thought about it too long, Matt’s voice would creep into your thoughts. Random things he had told you throughout the time you knew him. Empty promises he made to Exodus. Honest sentiment he gave to Y/N. The last words you heard him say.

You shoved those thoughts to a deep corner of your mind as you headed back to the living room. The chest in the closet seemed to call out to you. The chest full of boxing memorabilia pertaining to Matt’s father, some of his own collection and some you were able to add for him, one of his bibles, and the false bottom that allowed him to hide his suit.

The suit that would never be there again.

You sighed and shook your head before heading to your bedroom to find clothes for the day. You might as well get ready since you knew your mind wasn’t going to let you sleep again anytime soon.

Wasting as much time as you could, you got ready and headed out into the city. You had been back from Quantico for about a week and you were trying to settle back into the Kitchen, but the nightmare of Midland haunted you every night. It was a little different everytime, sometimes the words they spoke to you changed and once it was Matt that killed you with your own blade, but it always the same premise. The three of you, everything coated in blood, and you died.

It was either your conscious gnawing at you and refusing to let you escape, even in sleep, or it was the universe telling you that death would find you. Either way, it never left your mind.

As you were out, you saw Matt in every face. Everywhere you went, you saw him. You almost called his name a few times until you got a better look and remembered he was dead. It felt like you were losing yourself in the grief, in the hopes that it was all a bad dream. Maybe you were still dreaming?

But then someone bumped your shoulder walking by and you knew you weren’t. Weeks had passed and you still couldn’t fully stomach the fact that he was gone. In your mind, you just wanted him there and he was everywhere but nowhere all at once.

You were wandering your usual streets, fighting through the relentless deja vu, stopping at one of the few lunch spots you missed, and ended up at the only building you thought could help. It was one of the few places you didn’t avoid prior to your time away, and now, maybe it was the only chance to cool the blaze under your skin. To fill the hole.

You walked in with a shaky breath and found Father Lantom outside the confessional, talking to one of the nuns with hushed urgency. But as you approached, he sent the nun away and turned to you with a small but welcoming smile. He gestured to the small, private conversation box and you simply nodded. He stepped inside first and you followed suit into your side about a minute later.

“Good to have you back.” Father Lantom said after a short silence. “How was your training?”

“Good, yeah, it was good.” You answered simply. “Dex said everything went really well so now it’s just waiting for approval or something, I don’t really remember…”

“It was quick.”

“Yeah, it was a specialty.. Accelerated… Accelerated program.” Your eyes fell and you noticed you were wringing your fingers. Since when did you do that? “Look, Father, I don’t know if there’s something I’m supposed to say to start this but…”

“Whatever you need to say, Y/N.” He offered genuinely. “Whenever you’re ready to say it.”

“I keep having this nightmare, Elektra and Matt and me. Under Midland and we all die together… Usually El does it but Matt’s done it too, killed me. And I thought being away would make it easier. But it feels worse… I can’t sleep. I hardly eat. I just feel empty.”

“Have you ever felt anything like this before?”

“When I was younger, when I realized what I was going to have to do in the Red Room. I didn’t feel like a person…”

“Hmm..”

“But then I got out and out of nowhere I meet Matt and suddenly… It was like my heart was beating in my chest for the first time.” You couldn’t fight the sad smile that stretched your lips. “Now, it’s like anytime I think about him, my heart can’t beat. It’s just there, weighing down my chest like a rock.”

“When Matt would first tell me about his night activities, he was so twisted up about some of the things he found.” He spoke carefully, treading a fine line between breaking the seal of confession and finding the details that he hoped would offer you comfort. “Some of the things he had seen, what some people in this town were capable of…”

“People like me?”

“No. He never spoke unkindly about you, even before he knew.”

That seemed to fill the hole a little but the blaze remained.

“Yeah, he wasn’t the type…” You sniffled. “Were you able to help him?”

“What I offered wasn’t the help he needed. I could offer bible verses and quotes to him every day, but he knew them all. He knew the stories and the psalms as easy as he knew his way here.”

“So what’d you say?”

“I told him to listen to his heart, because his had always been good. Angry and hurt, yes, but also good.”

“I’ve never felt this alone.” You spoke, a distance in your voice as you stared at the wood door in front of you. “I’ve been left before, by others and by my own choice. I’ve sabotaged my life to a point where I had to be alone and I’ve sacrificed my lifestyle to protect people around… I don’t want to feel this again.”

“Feeling these kinds of things is what makes us human.”

“Yeah..” You nodded, finding the familiar mental ledge that could take it all away. That could turn it all off so it didn’t matter, that would let Y/N rest. All you had to do… Was give her… A little push. “Maybe that humanity is the issue.”

“Guilt is a good thing.. It’s a soul’s call to action, the innate feeling that something is wrong. The only way to rid yourself of it is to correct your mistakes.”

“Correct my mistakes…” You repeated slowly. “I can’t correct this one… Not the way I’d need to. But I know how to get rid of these feelings.”

“Y/N?” He asked quickly and the concern was palpable in his voice.

“Thanks, Father… It’s been nice catching up.”

And with that, you left the church. You took a deep breathe when you stepped out, the crisp New York air hitting you as soon as you stepped out. There was something freeing in that breath. The heat still blazed with every beat of your stoned heart, leaving a trail of warmth through your veins. The hole still lived in your soul but now you fed it, all the sorrow and despair and loneliness was shoved into the hole. It didn’t fill it by any means, but it satisfied it enough that it wouldn’t swallow you whole. It allowed you to live, and for now that was enough.

The rest of your day was relatively uneventful. You went home for a while and did some reorganzing. You cleaned up some of Matt’s leftover belongings that you were unable to touch before. You even started a pile of things that you figured you should donate. Someone else in the Kitchen could probably use some of those suits.

You took down some photos and put them in the closet with his chest. You even took down that painting from the art gallery you bought. It was the red one Vanessa had showed you. You bought it because you had liked it. It made you think of the Man in the Mask and how turbulent your relationship was but now that he was gone, it was just another token of a dead life. So you shoved it away as well.

You cleaned some of the things you had been neglecting and began to feel like you were actually getting some sort of normalcy back. It wasn’t the normalcy that Matt would’ve wanted for you. You could recognize that, but you never expected to have that anyway. You never had the normalcy he wanted for you when he wasn’t around, so you felt no requirement to find it now that he was gone. And maybe you owed it to his memory to live a real life, live a life of peace, but that was never part of you.

It was later that night when you realized what day it was.

Curtis’ support group for veterans.

You were always welcomed there, ever since you started with Anvil. He never made you talk but the option was always there. And you did, occasionally, if only to shut down one of the other guys. There was a certain respect from Curtis that you didn’t find in other people. He knew you were from an ‘elite covert kill squad’ since childhood but he didn’t ask other questions. He didn’t need to know everything to know that you were lost. It was refreshing and you liked to stay after official sessions to talk about whatever you were thinking or feeling.

But glancing at the time, it was too late for that. So you shrugged it off and decided you’d go next time. At least to say hello to an old friend, the least judgemental one you had left. Instead, you decided you’d go to the bookstore and add to your to-be-read collection while continuing to ignore texts from everyone that knew you.

It wasn’t long until alleged vigilantism found it’s way to you. That next morning, stories of an assault at a construction zone hit your ears. Bodies found under fresh concrete with more blunt force injuries than they should’ve had. Then, estimated to be a few hours later, a hit against a prominent crime family.

It had a familiarity to it that you couldn’t quite place, but it gave you an odd sense of comfort. There was the haunt of concern in your bones, as if you worried that there was something left unanswered within you, but Matt took that part with him. When he died, so did that part of you that wanted to do something good. That wanted to help the neighborhood you loved. You liked the fact that someone else was handling it for you, but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t vaguely set off an old itch that liked to be scratched. An old manic, sadistic, worrisome itch that could easily spiral to a full blown bloodbath.

So instead, you carried on with your day. You went to the grocery store to refill your fridge and your pantry. You bought some new clothes, more fitting for an FBI agent, and got some plastic totes to put away some of Matt’s things. The things you didn’t want to look at but couldn’t quite bring yourself to get rid of.

While you were out, you decided to stop by an old warehouse. You weren’t even sure if he would be there, but it was the only starting point you had. You knocked lightly on the door before heading inside, watching the corners and dark shadows carefully.

“Melvin.” You called out when you saw the vague shape of a man sweeping in the corner. “I just wanna talk.”

“Whoever you are, I don’t talk.” He said sharply, coming into full view with a wrench gripped tightly in his hands. “Just go on back the way you came and this never happened.”

“We had a mutual friend.” You said simply, lifting your head a little. “Our Man in the Mask.”

“Shit.” He breathed, slowly dropping the wrench. “I uh, heard he’s gone… That true?”

“Yeah. Your suit protected him from a lot but couldn’t withstand a falling building.”

“Shit.” He said again.

“Mmm.” You agreed. “I came to ask you for something. A vest. Clean lines, simple build. Something I can wear daily, under my normal clothes.”

“Guess that makes you Exodus, huh?” He broke into a small smile that didn’t last. “Sorry but I don’t do that anymore.”

“Yeah, I figured… Neither do I, not really. Ever since Red went down, I…” You took a deep breath. “I got a good job lined up, just need a little something.”

He sighed heavily and turned to the ceiling before facing you again.

“I’ll do you a favor, just this once cause your friend always kept his word. But don’t expect anything else.” He said firmly, pointing a finger at you.

“One and done.” You nodded.

“Alright.. Ah jeez, okay. Your measurements the same? Red and black still?”

“Yeah, pretty much.” You looked at your arms and chest. “And uh, no. No red.”

“C’mon.” He guffawed. “You and Daredevil were partners. You don’t want anything to remember him?”

“Just do whatever.” You shrugged. “How much?”

“It’s on me. I never charged your buddy so… Just gimme a day or two. I’ll get you something nice.”

“I appreciate it.” You offered a smile, though you didn’t quite mean it. “Thanks, Melvin.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He waved you off. “Don’t ask me for nothing. Alright? I mean it.”

“I get it.” You insisted as you backed towards the door. “Looking forward to it.”

Later that day, not long after you had unloaded all of your groceries, a hard knock sounded at your door. You ignored it, assuming it was just your friends coming to see if you were home yet. Either that, some kids screwing around, or it was just someone from your past coming to kill you. Who exactly was out to get you at that point, you weren’t sure, but there were enough skeletons in your closet that hadn’t fallen out yet. So you went about your business until the door flew open and someone rushed in.

Calmly, you grabbed the gun you tucked between the fridge and wall and turned to face whoever was in your apartment. You gripped it comfortably and cleared your throat, seeing them turn with a sharp gasp. Your brows raised expectantly and Karen’s hands shot up instantly.

“God, Y/N, you scared me.” She breathed before covering a hand to her chest. “How long have you been back?”

“How often do you come into my apartment?” You asked instead, lowering the gun but not putting it down.

“I just-” She tried to explain but her eyes kept falling to the gun. “Can you put that down, please?”

“Don’t trust me anymore?” You raised your brows before tucking the gun into the back of your waistband. “Answer my question.”

“Has he reached out to you?” She asked instead.

“I’m not playing games, Karen. If you have something to tell me, then spit it out and get out of my apartment. If you only came here to fuck around…”

“Frank.” She said quickly. “Frank’s back.”

“Explains the news.” You tilted your head in acknowledgement. “What’d he come to you for?”

“Something about some Micro, a guy that came after him recently. Knows who he is, that he’s alive.”

“Micro… This guy have a real name?”

“David Lieberman, NSA analyst that is officially shot dead by Homeland Security a year ago.”

“Only he’s not.” You nodded. “Okay. Where’s Frank now?”

“I don’t know.”

“Is he going after Lieberman?” You closed your eyes and rubbed your forehead, weighing the pros and cons of you getting involved.

“Probably… But Frank said he’s a- He’s a spook. How would he find him?”

“Well, he wouldn’t go for him directly, but someone that knows him or is relevant to him just might work to draw him out. What other names did you work out?”

“Carson Wolf got the whole story cut, could be something there.”

“Probably.. Name sounds familiar.” You felt the scales tilting back and forth in your brain. “Why did you come and tell me about this?”

“Because I-” She hesitated, as if she had just noticed your reaction. “He doesn’t really seem like he wants me involved.”

“So you want me to go run into a fight I know nothing about?” You dropped your hand against your leg with a smack and opened your eyes. “Don’t you think if Frank wanted my help, he would’ve came to me himself?”

“Maybe he didn’t know where to find you.” She offered, clearly searching for anything to convince you.

“Or maybe he didn’t care enough to find me.” You countered with a shrug. But seeing the desperation in her eyes, feeling the plead in her bones, you sighed heavily. “I’ll think about it… I’ll look into Lieberman, maybe there’s a wife or siblings or something. And this Wolf guy, I think I heard his name around Quantico so I guess I can pull some strings in that direction.”

“Thank you.” She let out a sharp exhale, as if she had been holding her breath for your response. “Have you told Foggy you’re back?”

“No.” You turned away to busy yourself in your kitchen. “Haven’t told anyone.”

“I’m sure he’d love to see you.” She tried gently. You noticed the hesitation in her words and realized she was walking on eggshells, completely unsure of how stable you were. “Or at least hear from you.”

“The last conversation we had was an argument.” You admitted, though your voice lacked the remorse it should’ve had and it was too late to add it in now. “And he flinched away from me… He told me that if I wanted to get myself killed, I was more than welcome to as long as I didn’t try to blame anyone other than myself for it.”

Her mouth opened and closed in silence, like she was chomping at the air while she tried to find a response. Finally, her voice found her and it was the same response you expected.

“He had to have still been in shock.”

“He had more than enough time to get over it.”

“I know he wouldn’t say that to you and mean it.” She reasoned.

“Yeah, just like Matt never would’ve said half of what he said to me during the Castle trial, right?” Your brows raised in accusation and you saw her expression drop. “Yeah, sometimes pain or shock bring out what people really mean.”

“Y/N-”

“Doesn’t matter.” You cut in firmly. “Next time you see Frank, ask him if he wants my help. In the meantime, I’ll poke around and start building some intel.”

“Thanks.” She forced a tight smile. “And I’ll talk to Foggy, if you want me to.”

You simply shrugged.

“He’s one of your best friends, isn’t he?” She asked gently, scared for what your answer would be.

“Most of the people I’ve called friends have grown to hate me for one reason or another… I guess I always knew I’d add Foggy to that list one of these days.” You answered flatly.

“C’mon, Y/N.” She tried again.

“Better that than dead… You can go now.”

With a small gesture of defeat, she left. And you wondered if you were going to regret getting involved.

Some quick research into Lieberman showed he did leave a family behind, a wife and two kids. You had no intentions of hurting them but should there be a need, you had blackmail material. He was allegedly shot dead by Homeland after resisting arrest. There was nothing about why he was wanted by Homeland, nor was there anything about his career. But he was NSA, so there should’ve been something other than a passing mention.

That all just meant someone wanted it to go away, and that someone was likely this Carson Wolf character.

You thought about going over to the address you could find for Sarah Lieberman but you assumed Frank would’ve been there already. And two unfamiliar visitors in one day would’ve triggered some sort of concern in the wife, who you had to assume was helping hide her undead husband until you knew otherwise. Instead, you wrote down the address and looked into Carson Wolf. You found that he was one of the higher ups at Homeland Security. It was an interesting connection that you’d have to poke at later.

With a little digging, you also found some information on the construction site incident. There was a feature on the company’s webpage about a new employee, which was asterisked as inactive the day after the bodies were found. There was no picture on the page but you could only assume that Pete Castiglione was the one and only, Frank Castle.

You decided to get out of the house and headed out to get something to drink. You passed by Josie’s and thought about going in. But when you reached the door, you were hit with one of many memories of you and Matt in that place so you had to pass. You passed other bars as you wandered and none really seemed inviting. Eventually, your feet grew tired of aimlessly moving so you settled on a bar you had been to with Billy a few times. Low and behold, Billy was already there.

You felt his eyes following you as you passed by, taking a seat at the bar a few seats down. You ordered your drink and when it came out, you spun the liquid around the glass, listening vaguely to Billy talking about his service and Frank.

The woman kept asking questions pertaining to Frank and their conversation held your interest. Without making it obvious, you noted what she was asking.

Did he get dirty? Could he have been involved in drugs over there?

But why ask questions about a dead man? Who was she?

The gears in your brain were turning when you heard Billy’s question.

“So you’re single?” He asked, clear flirting in his tone. Your head cocked slightly and your brow raised, noticing he was already looking at you for a reaction. He laughed and tilted his bottle towards you but you simply smiled and shook your head.

He went back to his flirting and you rolled your eyes slightly at his next remark. But you did hear a name.

Special Agent Madani.

You could tell she was either going to be one hell of an obstacle or one hell of an ally.

You watched her leave and then decided to slide into her seat.

“Billy Russo, always the player.” You teased with a sly smile and he grinned. “How’ve you been? Lonely?”

“Y/N Y/L/N.” He said happily. “And here I thought I’d never see you again.”

“Well, Quantico was fun but I got bored.” You shrugged playfully. “Knew everything they wanted to teach me.”

“Yeah, I bet you did..” He nodded, never dropping that sly smile. “Bet you made one hell of an impression too.”

“Don’t I always?”

“Yes, you do… Y’know, I missed you.”

“You did not.” You scoffed lightly, gesturing to the bartender for a second drink. “Judging by your latest visitor.”

“Ah, I see what this is.” He chuckled. “You’re jealous.”

“In your dreams, Russo.” You rolled your eyes with an amused smile. “Who was that anyways? She was asking a lot of questions…”

“Dinah Madani.” He answered simply. “Homeland agent that brought a team through Anvil earlier.”

“Homeland, huh?” You turned towards the door even though she was long gone. “Interesting…”

“Why?”

When you didn’t answer, he reached for your chin and turned your face towards him.

“What’s goin’ on in that head of yours?” His eyes darted between yours as he tried to figure you out, but you knew he never would. Not in any way that would mean anything.

“Just curious why a Homeland agent is asking about a dead man is all…” You shrugged. “And it’s a pattern.”

“Oh, it’s a pattern.” He said with a nod, acting as if it explained everything. “What does the pattern tell you?”

“That you like women in power.” You answered plainly. “Me, now in the FBI and everything else I’ve done. Madani, in Homeland with what I would assume is solid standing. Next thing you know, you’re gonna bed a senator.”

“I’ll still come back to my best girl.” He smiled, tapping under your chin with a click of his tongue.

“Yeah, like there was any competition.” You chuckled.

“When’d you get back?” He nodded towards you, decidingly dropping your previous conversation topic.

“Week ago. I thought about coming by, decided not to.” A slight shrug of your shoulder.

“Why not?” He almost sounded hurt.

“Just tired. Needed sound time to settle in.”

“Yeah?” He leaned in slightly and raised his brows. “How about we spend some quality time tonight then, hmm? You got any other plans?”

“Hmm.” The corner of your mouth lifted to a small smile. “I’ll have to check my schedule, Mr. Russo.”

He clicked his tongue and leaned back, wagging his finger at you with an amused smirk of his own. “I missed hearing you say that, pretty lady.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You nodded and sipped your drink.

You spent a little while longer drinking with Billy, catching up and teasing each other playfully. It was almost enough for you to forget what you had been asked earlier that night, to involve yourself in Frank’s latest crusade that he likely expected to cover on his own. Finding Frank would’ve been easy enough if you had a general direction to go in, but where could be? Would he be going after Micro or would he be taunting Micro to go after him again?

If this guy was as much a spook as Karen’s been led to believe, it wouldn’t be easy to draw him out. But knowing Frank, he would find a way to pull him out of his hidey-hole. Which meant you could follow your own leads tonight and potentially meet him, or you could worry about it tomorrow and waste a night with an old fling.

Billy was tempting… And Frank would be fine for one more night, wherever he was.

[bfi-archive]

NEW LOOK AT EX’S VESTED LOOK, WITH WRIST BRACE AND HAND WRAPS

[petertingle-yipyip]

world class sinner - frank castle (masterlist)

season 2

pairings: billy russo x reader , frank castle x reader , punisher x exodus

summary: with daredevil dead, exodus returns from Quantico unsure of who she should be. fighting nightmares and deja vu, small sparks threaten to revive something saved for matt murdock before a shocking betrayal rattles New York’s two most dangerous vigilantes.

(1) - deja vu : Being back in the Kitchen almost immediately pulls her back into a fight. But without Matt, what has she become?

(2) if he had been with me: Further and further her humanity goes as Y/N commits herself to Frank Castle's crusade. Small moments threaten to bring her back, but how can she when there's nothing worth it... Or is there.

(3) haunted: Can’t breathe, can’t turn back. Y/N continues to walk the fragile line of her morality while finding an uneasy comfort in the presence of Billy Russo, despite being haunted by Matt Murdock’s memory. But reuniting with Frank Castle makes it little less miserable.

(4) aftermath: A quick run nearly turns disastrous when a bold move goes wrong. An attempted reconciliation between friends turns nasty, all because the aftermath of Midland Circle still lingers in Y/N’s actions.

(5) build god then we'll talk: Temporary alliances form on one side before fighting off an ambush from the other. All the while, dots are connecting for more than one player as the game grows more and more dangerous.

(6) so what now? : Limits are pushed and more secrets pile up as she continues to pretend on both sides. When they creep closer to one another, can she maintain all of her lies and save face or will she be forced to pick what relationship matters most?

(7) so it goes… : All eyes on her, a skilled illusionist. Playing the field for information gets what she needed but could threaten the relationship keeping her afloat.

(8) beautiful liar : A breaking point, new alliances, and seeds of mutual trust show Y/N who is and who isn’t on her side.

(9) bad omens: Lingering omens finally register and truths are revealed through blood, bullets, and betrayals.

(10) is it over now?: A long time coming, one fight comes to a bloody conclusion. Another lurks in the near future, and the connection between two friends and two lover is severed.

(11) sinner: It all comes down to one final night, where’s it all began. One who thinks he’s a god versus the one who once scared the Devil and the Punisher. The Devil wasn’t wrong after all to fear the evil she delivers.

(epilogue) i know it won’t work: After a couple weeks, Y/N decides to open Frank’s letter.

[petertingle-yipyip]

WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE

two - if he had been with me

tags: n/a // one // three // masterlist

Pairing: Billy x Reader (Casual) , Frank x Reader (Platonic)

Word Count: 7,195

Summary: Further and further her humanity goes as Y/N commits herself to Frank Castle's crusade. Small moments threaten to bring her back, but how can she when there's nothing worth it... Or is there.

The next morning, you woke in a start with the same dream. A hand flying to your chest while the other rubbed the nonexistent blood out of your eye. Glancing around while the room spun for moments, you recognized you weren’t in the rubble but in your bed. Although the weight against your chest would’ve argued otherwise. When you got back from washing your face, Billy was awake and sitting at the edge of the bed.

“You still dream about him?” He asked simply.

“Hmm?” Your brows raised innocently. “Dream about who?”

“C’mon, Y/N. I hear you talkin’ in your sleep. Mumblin’ about your precious Matt. It was like that before you left too.”

You shrugged and leaned on the doorframe. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“And you took down some of the pictures. And the painting.”

“You’re starting to sound like my friends, Billy.” You said with a slight edge to your tone.

“That’s a bad thing now?”

“It’s an annoying thing right now.” You countered. “There’s a reason I’m avoiding them.”

“Y/N.. If you need more time-” He tried and you groaned as you pushed yourself up. “Don’t do that!”

“You know where the door is once your pants are on!” You called over your shoulder, waving a hand goodbye while you headed to your kitchen. “Don’t embarrass yourself in front of Miss Fran across the hall. She’ll stop being nice to me.”

There was a quiet commotion while he shuffled around your bedroom, finding the sporadic trail of clothes before he made his way over to you. He leaned against the countertop while you busied your hands and attention on the stove.

“Y/N, I’m not trynna make you talk about somethin’ you don’t want to, alright? Bringing up your guy crossed a line. I’m sorry…” He offered gently. Honestly. And the sentiment made you roll your eyes to yourself. “I just wanna make sure you’re good.”

You sighed heavily and turned towards him. “I’m fine.” You offered a tight, meaningless smile. “Happy?”

He shook his head and sighed inwardly while you turned away.

“So.. How long do I still have you for?” He asked instead.

“What?” Your brows furrowed at the odd question.

“Your words. You can’t work Anvil and your hotshot FBI gig at the same time. When is it official?”

“Oh.. I don’t know. I got my badge before I left so Dex tells me we’re just waiting on the SAC to get the go-ahead. I can work as a freelancer if you need me in the meantime.”

“I always need you.”

“Yeah, okay.” You scoffed. “When’s your next recruitment?”

“I gotta check, b... I’ll let you know.. You wanna come with me later? I gotta go see Curtis.”

“No, I gotta take care of some other stuff.” You brushed him off, knowing you had to devote some time today to finding Frank and Micro. “But I’m going to Curtis’ meeting today so we should cross paths.”

“Then I will see you later.” He nodded before pushing off to get ready to leave.

Once he was gone, you got yourself ready. You took a quick shower and wore an outfit fitting for an FBI agent, given that was the guise you would use to get into her house, and clipped your badge to your belt. You dug through your collection to find one of the pocket devices that came in handy when it came to cameras and signals, for nothing more than your own hunch for an NSA agent’s house. You added your gun to the back of your belt - more to pull the persona together than any sort of threat - and headed out to Sarah Lieberman’s.

As you drove over to the house, Dex called. He asked if you wanted in on a potential investigation, something about Carson Wolf being murdered in his own home the night before. It was an interesting coincidence given the fact that Frank had returned and a separate agent was asking questions about him. You had no doubts that Frank was involved but it did leave a nice chance to find out just how dirty Wolf was to get himself killed. You agreed to throw your name into the pot.

“Hi, are you Sarah Lieberman?” You asked politely and she shifted uncomfortably in her doorway.

“Yes. Can I help you?” She asked tightly and you saw the blur of a child running around behind her.

“I’m Special Agent Y/L/N. May I come in?”

“What is this about?”

“Have you had any sort of odd interactions recently? A man who seemed to have appeared out of the blue.”

“This is about Pete.” She sighed with a nervous chuckle. “I just filed the insurance claim yesterday. I didn’t think it would… Wait, special agent?”

“Yes.” You nodded simply, shifting your jacket to show your badge. “May I come in?”

She nodded quietly and stepped aside, welcoming you in. Once you crossed the threshold, the sharp tone pinged in your ear. You winced inwardly and rubbed the area near your implant, glancing around to find something that would’ve interfered with the signal. There was a camera somewhere, the watchful eye of the ghost of a spouse, and it wasn’t likely to be alone. Your eyes were darting quickly, between corners and other wall decor for the small lens but you couldn’t find anything. Nothing obvious at least.

“Are you alright, Agent?” She asked from your side, offering you the worried eyes that often became the default for mothers.

“Yes, just a migraine.” You gestured vaguely to your head.

“Oh! I have Tylenol. Give me just a second.”

“No, I’d hate to put you out.” “Nonsense.” She smiled kindly and disappeared into her kitchen.

You made a small noise to yourself before pulling that pocket tech. You booted it up and wandered the living room, changing the height and angle as the screen flashed to track down the nearest camera. As you were searching, you noticed a small body on the stairs watching you.

“Who are you?” He asked with lips pursed in disgust as if to say how dare someone be in his home.

“FBI. Who are you?” You answered simply as your device pointed you to a family portrait. You smirked slightly and tapped some buttons, beginning to track the signal. Before you would leave,  you would know exactly where to go.

“I live here.” He stated as if it was obvious.

“It’s a nice house.” You nodded, finally turning to face the disgruntled young boy. “Can I ask you about the man from yesterday?”

“I didn’t see him.”

“Okay..”

“I didn’t!” He insisted.

“I believe you, kiddo.” You chuckled slightly.

“Can I hold your gun?” He asked suddenly.

“Absolutely not.” You shook your head and he frowned. “You get a little older and I can teach you how to use it.”

His eyes lit up before he scampered back up the stairs, and you wondered if that was something Sarah should be concerned about. She came back soon after and she profusely apologized, just in case her son said anything uncalled for. You brushed it off and accepted her offer of painkillers and water. You two spoke about the interaction from the day before between her and “Pete”.

“Mrs. Lieberman, I haven’t been entirely truthful with you.” You confessed, intending to build some sense of trust in case you needed her for information later on. “I’m not just looking for Pete out of coincidence. He’s family… I haven’t heard from him in a long time and the FBI gave me more resources to try and track him down. He’s refused to answer any of my messages across any platform but now I have a chance to reconnect with him.”

“Oh.” She smiled slightly. “Pete didn’t mention a sister.”

“Cousin, actually. All the family I have are just cousins..”

“We exchanged numbers and I can give that.”

“I doubt he’d answer.” You shook your head. “He always seems to know when I’m calling.”

“Okay... Well, my insurance is sending some paperwork that’ll need his signature so I’ll see him again. I can let him know you stopped by.” She offered honestly.

“That’d be great, thank you.” You nodded with a faux sentimental smile. Your tech buzzed in your pocket and you knew you had the source of the signal. “I’d better be going.”

She offered you something to eat, saying you’d be more than welcome to stay for lunch but you brushed off her invitation. You couldn’t waste any more time with socializing and pleasantries. The only thing that stopped you from heading straight over was your prior commitment to stop by Curtis’. The commitment was only made to get Billy out of your apartment without being completely blunt about it, given the fact that you two would still be interacting at Anvil and likely throughout the course of whatever crusade you were riding into. And despite your mild stalling, you ended up walking into Billy and Curtis’ conversation. So you hung back in the hall for a minute to allow yourself to be nosy.

“Mover and a shaker. A man of wealth and taste.” Curtis said and you could hear the smile in his words. “You always knew you were destined to do great things, I’ll give you that.”

The guys both chuckled slightly.

“I can’t tell if you think that’s a good thing or not.” Billy said with a small laugh.

“No, I’m proud of you man.”

“Y’know there’s always a job for you at Anvil... An instructor’s job.”

“Y/N finally make it official then and leave your ass?” Curtis asked and you could imagine the expression he wore. “She ever call you back?”

“No but…” Billy sighed and your brows furrowed. “When it comes to Y/N, I just…”

“Lose all sense in your head.” Curtis teased.

“I do not!” Billy laughed.

“Man, I have never seen you fawn over any woman like that! You’re like a lost little puppy whenever she comes around.”

“Kiss my ass.” He laughed and you waited a beat before walking in. “It’s not about Y/N, alright?”

“Topic of conversation even when I’m not in the room, huh?” You joked with a wide grin. “Nice to see you, Curtis.”

“I was wondering when you’d finally walk through that door.” Curtis grinned and stood to hug you. “How was training?”

“Boring.” You shrugged. “Knew it all.”

“Show off.”

“Yeah, a bit.”

“Y/N, don’t you think Curtis would be great as an instructor at Anvil?” Billy tried, coming to your side to use you in their prior conversation.

“Hell of a corpsman from what I heard.” You agreed. “I bet you would’ve sewn your own leg back on if you had the chance.”

“Hell yeah, you wanna go find it?” Curtis laughed. “You gonna stay? I know some of the guys have just been waiting to try and rile you up again.”

“Yeah, I’ve got some time to kill.” You said with a small nod. “Don’t expect me to come in later this week then.”

“Sounds good.. Wanna help get some of the snacks from the kitchen? Keep you outta trouble.” Curtis pointed a stern finger at you. “C’mon.” You laughed. “When have I ever gotten into trouble?”

“I’ve gotta take off but we still good for tomorrow night?” Billy asked Curtis and you had the itch to be nosy again.

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” Curtis nodded.

“You know making plans when someone else in the room isn’t invited makes people uncomfortable, right?” You said plainly, though it made the boys laugh.

“Tomorrow’s Frank’s birthday.” Curtis explained. “You were his lawyer, right?”

“Yeah, till he blew his top and kamikaze’d my case.” You rolled your eyes slightly as you thought about his outburst on the stand that day. “I do feel bad about the way it all went down though…”

“You wanna come?” Billy tapped your arm. “Just a little memorial thing, y’know, personal.”

“Yeah, I’d love to. Thanks.” You gave a tight, hopefully grateful smile. “I’ll be back with the snacks.”

“Thanks, Y/N.” Curtis nodded and when he thought you were out of earshot, you heard him ask Billy. “Let me guess. You still haven’t told her how you feel.”

That was going to make things awkward.

You stayed for the meeting but didn’t say much. Some of the members welcomed you back and hung around to catch up afterwards. Others hardly noticed but one man, some old white man who’s name you never cared to learn, continued to disregard you and say that you didn’t deserve the seat. You offered to go outside and show him exactly what you thought he deserved, but Curtis was quick to shut that down. Even though the man was practically cowering away from you by that point. Other than the cranky old man, it was nice to be back in that sort of routine.

The next day, you swung by Melvin’s workshop and hung around while he finished the vest. Despite your hesitations, he had utilized a dark red base fabric that was seen between the edges of the plates. There were devil horns that sat level with your collarbones at the center of the chest, matching the horn tattoo near your spine that you got your first night at Quantico as an alleged initiation ritual. There was white stitching along the hem of the collar and a faint stitched outline of an hourglass. When you asked about it, he said that it was a tribute to where you came from but it was white to show that you were better. You scolded him for sounding like Matt, left some money on his bench, and chucked it in your trunk before you decided it was time to find Frank.

You hopped back in your car and followed the route you were recommended. As you drew closer to the location, the scenery didn’t surprise you at all. It was remote, well out of the way of any city traffic. Everything around it seemed abandoned, or damn near it. There wasn’t another soul for blocks, maybe even miles.

Perfect spot for a ghost.

You ditched your car a few alleys over and kept your pocket device in hand, though you took a second to tuck your badge under your seat. As you got closer, you were able to track cameras and their field of view. You had to circle the building a couple times before you caught sight of a blind spot that led right up to an old, rusted out chain link gate. Behind the gate sat an old maintenance door that was practically falling off its hinges. Beside that, a ladder to the roof, where you assumed another point of access would be. If not a door, then the vents.

You hurried across the gap and squeezed between the fence. When you shifted the door, it creaked loudly and the sound echoed through the empty alleys. You cursed slightly and moved it out of the way enough for you to sneak in sideways. It fell back into place with a loud thud and you winced slightly as it echoed in your hollow chest, dense enough to mimic the Midland explosion. In a swift motion, you tucked away your tech and pulled your gun, keeping it aimed downwards but your muscles remained tense. You crept the dark halls, hearing vague voices from a distance.

You kept going, following the voices and the small glow of light, until you were a few feet from where the guys were. Low and behold, Frank Castle. Part of you wanted to scream at him, to curse him out and make him feel bad for never reaching out. You wanted to shame him for ignoring you, for not being there when your entire life fell apart and Matt’s life was taken. But you willed yourself to stay still, to stay quiet.

Screaming about it wouldn’t change the past, so why bring it up at all?

The heat that lived inside of you now made a friend in the Midland echoes and they both danced through your veins. They teetered around the edges of that hole, leaning and pulling away as if to tempt the darkness to swallow them too. But nothing would get rid of those. Nothing would rid your body of their influence. Instead, you kicked those feelings into the gaping chasm in your soul and kept your eyes forward.

There was another man in the room, sitting in a desk chair. Even though his body was angled away from you, you could tell the man was completely naked. Your brows furrowed as to why that would be what Frank chose to do but you shrugged it off as some form of power play, a means of embarrassment and belittlement maybe. Either way, it didn’t change what you came for.

You tucked your gun away and snuck deeper into the room, listening in on their conversation while you thought about when to announce yourself.

“Hey.” He spoke desperately from the chair, dripping water - or maybe sweat - while Frank was unamused. “I’m the only friend you have, Frank.”

At that you laughed and the entire room fell silent.

“What the hell was that?” Frank muttered, turning towards the direction of your sound.

You cursed quietly and crept back into the dark hall. You looked around for somewhere to hide and saw that there was a series of open rafters on the ceiling. With a satisfied smirk, you hauled yourself up and tucked your feet just as Frank had come into the hall.

“I’m the only friend you have, Frank!” Micro tried again and you turned to face him, though you also tracked Frank’s steps. “Hey!”

“Where are you?” Frank said to himself as he stood beneath you.

You focused on the man in the chair and found he wasn’t necessarily afraid, not at that moment at least. He was concerned that Frank wouldn’t believe him, that Frank would kill him. You wondered what he really expected when he chose to instigate the Punisher but you shrugged it off to the male ego. He also felt desperate, that he needed his help more than anything. And while you knew deep down that you shouldn’t get involved, that you needed to keep some distance from vigilantism and fights so you could heal, you felt no necessity to stay away. Plus it was interesting.

“What are you looking for?” Micro shouted, drawing Frank back into the main room. “If someone was coming, Frank, who would it be?”

“You’d be surprised the shit she can get into.” Frank answered vaguely and you tilted your head in agreement. 

“She? Who’s she?”

“You know all this shit about me but you don’t know her?” Frank chuckled. “C’mon man.”

“Like her her? Like Exodus her?”

“No, the Queen of England.”

“Holy shit..” Micro breathed and panicked in his chair. He jerked roughly to try and free himself from the restraints. “You’re joking, right? There’s- She can’t find you, right?”

“I’m thinking she already did.”

The sudden blaring of an alarm drew your attention. You looked over and saw a timer ticking down on the computer screen. You pulled your tech and tried to access it, to override it, but it was too complex for you to do within that time frame. You groaned inwardly while the boys went back and forth as to whether or not the threat that loomed after the timer was real or not. Frank finally turned the chair and Lieberman admitted - and showed - that it wasn’t explosives, but a video feed. If he didn’t enter the code, then that video would be broadcasted to various media outlets.

But that, you could block. You watched the man type in the code and utilize a retina scanner but then quickly got to work blocking any streaming opportunity from the cameras. They would still work and record, but the second someone tried to send that video out of the building, it would crash the whole system. You thought about sending something of your own, something just to toy with Lieberman and show him that he isn’t as smart or as sneaky as he thought, but their next argument caught your interest.

“How many times was Ahmad Zubair beaten?” Lieberman practically yelled.

“Shut your mouth.” Frank warned and the anger radiating off of him rivaled the heat in your own bones.

Could that have been what Madani was so interested in? What was her stake in Zubair’s life?

“How many times was this innocent man tortured? He was a good man! He was an honorable father. He was a cop.”

Frank’s hand wrapped around Lieberman’s throat and that’s when you decided to make yourself known.

“What are you gonna do, kill him?” You called with your familiar accent, stretching your legs to let your feet dangle over the edge. Your voice caught both of their attention and you offered a small smile and wave in return. “You owe me some answers.”

“How did you find me?” Lieberman asked in a panic, shifting in the chair.

“Your wife.” You shrugged. “Once I got inside, the cameras were easy enough to trace.”

“You were in my house?”

“Don’t kill him yet, Frank.” You tried, slipping out from your hiding place and moving to stand beside your friend. “He may prove useful.”

Frank turned to you without letting him go and his eyes darted back and forth between yours. The hard anger seemed to soften when he caught glimpse of whatever he was looking for and he slowly let him go. He backed away and you heard Lieberman muttering quiet thanks. You rolled your eyes slightly and patted Frank’s back before moving around the room.

“I knew you weren’t gonna kill me.” Lieberman announced, as if to provoke Frank some more.

“Does he ever stop talking?” You asked Frank.

“Not yet.” He muttered.

“I know people, alright? I’m an analyst. It’s my job.” Lieberman continued. “I knew you wouldn’t kill me because you’re a good man, Frank.”

“Knowing he’s a good man doesn’t mean you know him so I wouldn’t flaunt that as if it matters.” You commented simply. “And you definitely don’t know me.”

“No… No, I don’t.” He admitted. “But I will.”

“Ha! Daredevil didn’t even really know me so I wouldn’t get any hopes up…” You turned to Frank. “We should catch up.”

“Yeah, a lot goin’ on right now.” He gestured to the room around you. “She tell you?”

Without saying her name, you knew he meant Karen.

“Told me you were around.” You shrugged. “The rest was me.”

“Course it was.” He offered half a smile. “It’s good to see you, Princess.”

“Yeah, you too.” You returned the expression.

“How’s Red?”

You pressed your lips together and gave a small shake of your head, which only seemed to confirm whatever he saw in your face just a few moments before. You waved it off and ignored the pulse of heat at the back of your neck, tracing the outline of your tattoo. The memories of Midland began to flash, that deep opening threatening to swallow you alive, so you cleared your throat to try and clear the memories. You knew it would be obvious that something was wrong and it was directly related to Matt and Daredevil, but you’d never speak a word of it in front of David Lieberman.

“What does Homeland know about Zubair? Where did it happen?” You turned away from Frank, feeling that pound of emotions in your chest. It was bubbling from that hole, sending vibrations through your bones as it begged for release.

“Kandahar.” Frank answered instead. “Why?”

“Does Homeland have the video?” You asked.

“Yeah..”

“Son of a bitch…” You sighed and ran a hand down your face. “Explains that.”

“Explains what? What does Homeland have to do with anything?” Lieberman asked quickly.

“Frank.” You said instead. “Things are a lot bigger than you think. A lot of connecting pieces are falling in my lap… Let me help.”

Frank faced you for a moment and scanned your face again. He was looking for something, maybe the same thing and maybe something else. You didn’t care to ask. You let him look, let him find whatever it was he would find. He sighed and gestured you over. You moved across the room and he took your arm to pull you out of Lieberman’s eyesight.

“I see it in your eyes, Princess.. You’re not alright, are you?” Frank asked quietly.

“He’s dead.” You answered simply, but your voice felt drowned out by the explosions in your heart. “And I did nothing.”

He frowned slightly and pulled you in for a tight embrace.

That seemed to dull the heat as your eyes closed tightly and the tears threatened. You wrapped your arms around him and balled his shirt into your fists. You buried your face against him and he offered quiet, gentle consolations. All the running, the burying your pain and pretending it didn’t exist, all of it swelled into a pressure in your head that escaped as hot tears.

“I don’t wanna do this here.” You pulled away and wiped your sleeve across your eyes. “Not now.”

“Y/N..” He tried but you backed away slowly and he didn’t stop you.

“I don’t wanna talk about it right now.” You shook your head. “I’ve gotta go, alright? I’ll come back tomorrow.”

You had Billy pick you up from your apartment and you two drove to the cemetery together. You followed his lead to the headstone and you hadn’t expected to feel your heart sink. Knowing Frank was alive and in New York with a fake tombstone while Matt was dead under New York and no one was ever going to know, there was no tangible way to remember him other than whatever was left in your apartment, it felt like it could kick your heart down that bottomless pit.

The thought made you shiver and you felt Billy put an arm around your shoulders to pull you into his side.

“Happy birthday, Frank.” Curtis toasted.

“You alright?” He leaned down to ask and you simply nodded, your voice having been swallowed up. “It’s a good thing, getting a stone.”

“Yeah, figured he deserved a marker of some kind, right?” Curtis agreed, passing you the bottle of liquor.

You nodded in thanks and took a drink before passing it on to Billy.

“Frank would’ve hated this, this maudlin shit.” Billy said with a sad laugh. You stepped out from under his arm and took his hand instead, hooking the other one around his arm and leaning on his shoulder. “I wish he’d…”

Curtis leaned around you to see his friend’s face better but you couldn't take your eyes off the stone.

“Why didn’t he… Why didn’t he come to us, man?” Billy continued and you felt genuine regret through your conjoined hands. You wondered, if only for a moment, what would’ve been different had Billy been involved. Maybe it doesn’t go to trial, or maybe Billy’s the character witness rather than Schoonover. Maybe Nelson and Murdock doesn’t fall apart. Maybe you and Matt end up too busy with cases to investigate Midland. Or maybe you meet Billy at a time that you could’ve allowed yourself to feel something. You had to swallow the thoughts down, feeding them to the nagging emptiness.

“He didn’t have to be alone. We could’ve helped him.” Billy continued. 

“He didn’t want any help.” Curtis shrugged. “He wanted to kill every bastard who had a hand in it.”

“I miss him..”

“Me too.” You finally spoke.

“I could see it, before everything. He was finding it harder and harder to come back.”

“He said Kandahar was like nothing else.” Curtis agreed and your ears perked up, picking up your head from Billy’s shoulder. “He said the lines were blurred.”

“When did he say that?” Billy asked and his body language almost felt defensive.

Maybe he was there too.

“When he was over there.” Curtis answered after a short pause and you could tell he was lying. Frank had to have reached out to Curtis after the Kandahar incident, after Ahmad Zubair. “He called me, y’know, to shoot the shit. Said I was lucky not to be there.”

“Yeah..” Billy breathed but it was clear that he didn’t fully believe Curtis. At the same time, he had nothing to accuse his friend of. “You were.”

You all hung out at the gravesite a little while longer, sharing stories and memories of Frank. You told them about in the interrogation room, when you needed a witness and he alluded to Billy. The comment of “you’d like him too much” made Billy laugh. You even admitted that in the short time you knew him, Frank was one of your few real friends and you felt some guilt over his death. Both men assured you it wasn’t on you but that didn’t change anything in your own head.

On the ride back to your place, you decided to try and pry some information out of Billy.

“Can I ask you something?” You asked quietly, making it seem as if you were hesitant to ask.

“Yeah, what’s going on?” He answered simply. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah.. Yeah, I just wanted to ask about Kandahar.”

“Why you bringin’ it up?” He asked tightly, offering a sideways glance that practically screamed suspicion.

You gave half of a shrug and dropped your eyes to your lap, hoping to come off as nervous and uncertain.

“Hey.” He said gently, putting a hand on your leg as a silent apology.

“It’s just.. If Frank didn’t like it and you obviously didn’t like it all that much either, I feel like it was something bad.” You explained carefully, watching the inflections in your voice as you spoke. “Is there anything you can tell me about it?”

“We had orders.” Billy said simply, though his voice was gentle. Definitely one of the more gentler tones you’d heard from him, but he always spoke to you with a certain tenderness. Sometimes it made your stomach lurch, other times it felt safe. This time is was somewhere dangerously inbetween. “You know how that goes.. You don’t always like them or even agree with them but you can’t say shit in the moment.”

“Yeah, I get that.” You nodded, because you did. You knew that all too well. “It was that bad, huh?”

“I’d tell you more if I could but…”

“Classified.” You finished with a sigh. “I figured as much. I appreciate you telling me something though.”

“I think the later parts were the worst for Frankie.” Billy explained carefully, phrasing it as if it was his own assumption but you could tell there was something more knowing about it. “Some intel that didn’t exactly pan out, got us caught in an ambush, and it changed him. Changed the way he saw our unit. He ever mention that to you?”

You shook your head but you had to assume he was talking about the Zubair incident, maybe even the story his CO told on the stand. “All he told me was that it was usually off the books, or that was his impression at least, with all the secrets… But during the trial, Schoonover talked about a mission near the Hindu Kush. Frank didn’t agree, said it was an ambush, but he went anyway because orders are orders… Frank did what he did best and got every man out. I never got a chance to ask him about it but he wasn’t exactly all that talkative anyway.”

Billy gave a small chuckle and it broke up some of the tension in the car.

“He never was much of a chatter-box.” Billy smiled slightly.

“I guess that was your job, huh?” You teased and his smile grew a little wider. “Thank you, for being honest with me.”

“I’m not gonna lie to you if I don’t have to.”

“I appreciate that.” You nodded as he pulled up to your building. “It’d be nice if you could tell me a little more but I get it.”

“You are relentless.” He laughed, turning to face you with a soft expression. “With all your own secrets.”

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Your brows furrowed slightly and you felt the heat under your skin dampening and your stomach started to find its way into a small knot.

You hadn’t realized it until then but you had missed having someone look at you with admiration like that. Of course Matt had his own way of seeing you and he never hesitated to express just how much he loved you or wanted you, but something about seeing it in someone’s eyes felt different.

Maybe you were healing after all… The thought made you want to gag.

“Stop looking at me like that!” You laughed slightly and smacked his chest, which earned you nothing but a smile.

“How about this?” He offered, patting your leg before keeping his hand there. “There’s someone I may be able to introduce you to and if he likes you…”

“He’ll tell me anything I wanna know?” Your brows raised.

“I’ll tell you anything you wanna know.” He chuckled. “Deal?”

“Hmm… I’ll break you yet, Mr. Russo.”

“Looking forward to it.” He smirked before you got out.

You rolled your eyes in amusement as you entered the building. You headed up to your place, checking your phone to see a text from Dex saying Homeland was going to keep the investigation of Wolf’s murder. It didn’t surprise you that they’d want to be the ones to figure out what happened to their own man, but it did leave interesting possibilities. Was the ranking agent only doing it to keep something quiet or were they a good agent? Were they doing it out of loyalty to their bureau and to Wolf or were they doing it for their own interest? But what would knowing Wolf’s attacker serve anyone? It was a lot to consider, but unfortunately not enough to keep your usual nightmare at bay.

The next day, you wore the vest under your shirt - one of Matt’s old Columbia shirts because it fit better over the protection than your own. You had a gun at your back and a knife at the side of your waistband. You thought about just taking the retractable that Billy gave you a while ago but it was shoved in the closet, wrapped up in your suit and still coated in blood. You didn’t think you could take seeing it, expecting a red-tinted mania to accompany it. So instead, with your weapons of choice, you hopped in your car and headed back over to Lieberman’s hidey-hole.

The tension in the room made your skin tingle and sent a shiver down your spine. You rubbed your hands on your arms to disperse the feeling and walked in to find the boys in one of the side rooms, Lieberman untied and dressed and Frank tense.

“I don’t do partners.” Frank said angrily and you made a face to yourself.

You sat beside him and propped an elbow on his shoulder, which earned you a small scowl. 

“How do you keep sneaking in here?” Lieberman asked in annoyance.

“There’s a blind spot in your cameras.” You explained simply. “Leads right up to an old service entrance that isn’t locked and you two are too busy bickering to hear me coming.”

“Blind spot.” He scoffed. “Really?”

“Mhmm.” You nodded. “Anyway, did you turn off your little cameras?” You gestured vaguely to the ceiling.

“Yeah.. How did you know about them?”

You shrugged a shoulder and turned back to Frank.

“If you don’t do partners, what am I?” You asked with raised brows and he squinted his eyes as he looked at your face. “What?”

“You’re different today..” He said simply as he tried to piece together what changed.

“Okay?”

“What changed?”

“Nothing…”

“No, something’s different.”

“Nothing important.” You urged.

“Y/N.”

“Leave it alone, Frank.” You warned. “Now’s not the time.”

“Can we just-” Lieberman cut in and you looked at him with a slight glare. “Can we get back to what’s important?”

“And what exactly is that?” You humored him.

“We’ve all done things we would like to take back, but we can’t. We’re not the bad guys here, they are. Right?”

“Do we know who they are to begin with? Is that why Carson Wolf from Homeland is dead? Someone’s looking into Frank’s unit and I’m guessing it’s about the Kandahar incident. Wolf was part of the coverup for your death-” You pointed to Lieberman, who conceded with a small nod. “-and had to know about their off the books work. If you’re making Homeland your enemy, they’re not gonna back down. Not from a trio of ghost stories.”

“He means the guy who gave us the targets… Called him Agent Orange.” Frank explained carefully.

“That guy still around?” Your brows furrowed and Frank offered a shrug. Could that have been the person whose approval Billy needed before he told you anything?

“That night that my CO told you about during the case, that was the last one I ran with them. I should’ve killed Orange that night but.. Some of my guys pulled me off, said it was to protect me.”

“Who?”

Frank shook his head as if to say it wasn’t important.

“You could’ve ended it all that night.” Lieberman added. “You didn’t, and then they killed your family. You have to live with that.”

“Hey.” You said sharply and pointed a stern finger. “Watch your mouth or the next thing out of it is your tongue.”

He put his hands up in surrender. “This war you’re waging, Frank, it’s the U.S. government. It’s the CIA, and you just got rolled over by one spook zip-tied to an office chair.”

“Yeah, that’s a little embarrassing.” You muttered and Frank elbowed you in the ribs.

“I thought I needed you but you need me just as much.” Lieberman continued. “And now I’m starting to think we’ll need her too.”

“I think I have some connections that could be useful here.” You admitted. “I’ve made a few new friends since I last saw you, Frank. I already got in here twice without you guys knowing. You know I can hold my own.”

“Yeah, I get it.” Frank waved you off. “This isn’t gonna be like anything you’ve done before.”

“You don’t know any of the missions I ran before.” You shook your head. “You give me a team of three or four of my best, and we can take down an entire country’s government in twenty-four hours. I’m not afraid of this and I’m not afraid to die.”

“You’re only saying that cause Red di-”

“And you’re only doing this because your family.” You cut in firmly. “How is it different?”

“Just let her stay.” Lieberman offered. “She’s gonna do it anyway.”

“What about your friends?” Frank asked instead.

“Haven’t talked to them much since it happened...” You shrugged. “New job hasn’t put me on anything yet so it’s not like I’ll miss anything from there. Not leaving any kids or any family behind so..”

“Not even a boyfriend?” He tried, clearly trying to find anything to get you to reconsider.

You paused as you thought and Billy was the first thing that came to mind. But at the same time, Frank seemed to have already forgotten how stubborn you could be.

“No… Look, I didn’t leave you on that first rooftop. I didn’t leave you on that boat. I’m not leaving now.”

“I’m gonna regret this.” Frank groaned before nodding.

“Great.” Lieberman clapped his hands and stood. “I’ve spent months and months hacking every agency and their server.”

“How have they not caught you by now?” Your brows furrowed as you stood and followed him out of the room.

“I’m NSA. It’s my job.”

“Well I hacked into your stuff and you didn’t notice so..” You shrugged.

“You did what?”

“Nothing, continue.”

“Well… Okay, look, anything they can throw at us, right? Phone companies, police departments, it doesn’t matter, because I can throw it right back at them! I’ve been getting ready for you, Frank.”

“What does that mean?” Frank asked, though his worry for you was more pressing in his mind. You took a second to force it to the back of his mind and he shot you a glare as his focus suddenly changed, to which you shrugged innocently.

“What does that mean?” Lieberman repeated as if offended Frank would ask that, but it was a fair question. He hadn’t exactly said what he wanted Frank and got you for. “It means that every missile needs a guidance system. Without me, you’re just a blunt object.”

“You think pretty highly of yourself, don’t you?” You commented and Lieberman rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, go ahead. Blow me off. Go ahead!” He argued and the clatter drew your attention back.

You saw Frank doubled over, supporting himself against a nearby cabinet, so you hurried over to help him. His body language was tense like he wanted to push you off, but the concern in your eyes made him decide against it. Despite your cruelty, your growing neutrality, and overall lack of empathy in your day-to-day life, Frank Castle had a way of bringing back a more human nature. You scanned his body for injuries but saw nothing so it had to have been something systemic. He nodded slightly to say that he was okay but you didn’t leave his side.

Lieberman brought the desk chair over that he was tied to last you saw him but Frank waved him off. Lieberman tried insisting but you kicked the chair away, unintentionally hitting it against his knees but not apologizing for it. He put his hands up in surrender and gestured for you two to follow him back towards the computers. You sighed to yourself and began to lead Frank out.

“All that heroin was just financing for something else.” He explained when you two got closer. “Your operation Cerberus doesn’t exist. There’s no official record. There’s no congressional approval.”

“Yeah, it was off the books.” You answered simply. “We knew that already. Off the books usually equates to illegal so..”

“They turned you into a hitman, Frank.”

“There are worse things to be.” You shrugged.

“Look, I don’t care if we all trust each other. I don’t care to be blood brothers or any of that kids in a treehouse type shit. But right now, we want the same thing… So work with me.”

“One condition.” Frank said lowly, burning with his own anger. His own betrayal. It sparked something sadistically familiar in your chest.

“Yeah, anything.”

“They die.. Every single one of ‘em.” He turned up to you. “No trials.”

“I’m not the one that insists on the justice system.” You answered plainly.

“No bullshit.. They die.”

“Fine by me.” You shrugged.

After a moment’s thought, Lieberman answered.

“Yeah, I can live with that.”

[petertingle-yipyip]

mad at god (season 3) - matt murdock

season 1 // season 2 // season 2b // punisher spin-off

pairings: dex x reader, matt x reader, daredevil x exodus

summary: round and round she goes. just when she feels her life is on track and her emotions can occur without her own interference, her old enemy of Wilson Fisk begins to play games. Forced to choose between new friends and old, play the part or stand alone, life or death, things become as dangerous as they’ve ever been.

(1) house of memories: Times have changed since Midland Circle, so has Y/N. As she attempts to move forward, relationships are strained and circumstances are less than favorable. Can she cope on her own or will she fall back into old habits?

(2) all around me: Looped back in, Y/N has to make sure she holds on to what is starting to matter again. With rumors swirling of a copycat Mask, that grip gets desperately tighter.

(3) memories - Bridges burned and opportunity lost. Day by day the game against Fisk shifts more in his favor. How can Y/N fight back, protect her friends, and keep her career all at the same time?

(4) lavender haze - Betrayal and reunions. For Exodus, seems one can’t exist without the other. All relationships are tested when it all turns into something bigger.

(5) aimed to kill - Pages turn and bridges burn as Ex realizes the extent that she’s behind. When sentiment thrives amongst the chaos between her and her first love, question becomes whether they can fix their hearts with the lips that have left scars on each other.

(6) lover of mine - The constant circles and playing different parts grows more and more dizzying as events continue to unfold. Alliances tested and lives endangered, Ex and The Man in the Mask take a stand against the new Daredevil.

(7) as the world caves in - What feels like the final night alive, recovering from Dex’s latest attack feels almost impossible while trying to save everyone. The world continues to cave in around Ex while subconsciously adopting Matt’s old moral code, finding light in the dark.

(8) im not sorry -Moves and countermoves. The cat and mouse game nearly draws to a close as Nelson and Murdock reunite in a last ditch effort to finish things from the right side of the law.

(9) vigilante shit - Ladies always rise above but when one lady’s simply had enough, revenge takes human form in Hell’s Kitchen’s Exodus. With her rightful partner beside her, they take on the Kingpin and his former Bullseye.

Epilogue - all i wanted - Speaking from the heart, a good man is laid to rest and good friends are reunited. Plans for the future are scribbled on a new napkin and everything seems like it’ll be okay.

[petertingle-yipyip]

MAD AT GOD - MATT MURDOCK

Series Finale - Vigilante Shit

tags: @ironprincessstranger @americaarse @johnmurphys-sass @dusstory @astrobees @mayasaurus--rex @woowwwee // eight // epilogue // masterlist

Pairing: Matt X Reader

Word Count: 13,587 (and you wonder why it took me so long.)

Summary: Ladies always rise above but when one lady’s simply had enough, revenge takes human form in Hell’s Kitchen’s Exodus. With her rightful partner beside her, they take on the Kingpin and his former Bullseye.

“Do you affirm that the testimony you are about to give in the case now before the court will be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?” The bailiff asked simply as you took your seat on the stand. “This you affirm under the pains and penalties of perjury?”

“Yes.” You nodded calmly. “I do.”

“For the record, please state your name.” The judge said.

“I’m Special Agent Y/N Y/L/N, FBI SWAT. I’ve been with the bureau for a bit less than a year and all statements made here today are my own. My testimony does not reflect the beliefs or positions of the FBI and I accept any and all consequences my statements may bring.” You answered, keeping your eyes ahead as Tower stood and took his place in front of you. “In the short amount of time that I’ve been with the FBI, I’ve witnessed my bureau, specifically members of my team, fall victim to Fisk’s vicious manipulation.”

“Please explain in detail the crimes you’ve witnessed.” He said simply.

“I’ve witnessed slander and false accusations against one of the Nelson and Murdock attorneys responsible for his first arrest. I’ve witnessed a breach of his house arrest. I’ve witnessed his recruitment of agents and using those agents to kill people, both civilians and other agents. I’ve witnessed him coerce other crime syndicates into complying with a tax to ensure protection from federal prosecution.”

“What agents have you seen?”

“Special Agents Arinori and Poindexter, Special Agent in Charge Hattley. Special Agent Rahul Nadeem and myself witnessed but never participated past that and a few targeted raids. Neither of us pulled the trigger for Wilson Fisk, but we did nothing to stop it. There were others but I didn’t interact with them much.”

“The other agents that were mentioned by Agent Nadeem?”

“I believe so. I don’t remember their names but I could pick them out of a lineup.”

“And how many people were killed?”

“SAC Hattley killed Agent Winn. Special Agent Poindexter killed multiple people, I believe he killed the most. Given his unique skill set, he was a prime target for Fisk’s games. Innocent people died because of Wilson Fisk, good people like Father Lantom, because no one on my team was brave enough to come forward.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Who would believe a novice agent who helped put Fisk away in the first place? He knew no one would believe me if I spoke up sooner, given my very outspoken opinions against him. There was an instance, when he brought up the Nelson and Murdock attorney, that I had caused a scene. My words were driven by my sentimentality regarding the firm since I did have a small stint as an attorney there. From there, it didn’t matter what I knew and he recognized that. It didn’t matter how many times Poindexter brought me along without telling me what was really happening. It didn’t matter who I saw get killed or the fact that I was against him leaving the prison to begin with. He knew my credibility was low and I had no evidence so I wasn’t a threat to his plans… Not until someone else had enough. Agent Nadeem helped give me the courage to come forward with what I’ve seen.”

You glanced around at the jury and found them all - save for the one juror - interested in what you would say next. Tower offered a small, proud smile and Ray listened intently with his hands folded in front of him. He gave you a small nod of reassurance.

“It’s a scary thing, to feel like you have no choice but to do things you don’t agree with. Sometimes you go along for self preservation, sometimes for the people you care about. But at the end of it all, we have our limits. We can only take so much deceit before we have to do something…” You allowed your eyes to water, a shakiness to tint your voice and a slight hesitation between your sentences. “I let him convince me that my word wouldn’t matter, that I- I would just be some voice in the wind. I let him take my conviction. But I’m not going to stand down, not anymore. Wilson Fisk is afraid of what we came here to say because it’s true. The attack on our transport wasn’t a coincidence, nor was it an accident. He attempted to have us killed because of what we know and what we came here to say. If he was truly innocent, why is he trying to cover his tracks?”

“You mentioned repercussions before. Do you worry the FBI will punish you for this?”

“Not the FBI, but the agents Fisk controls. My SAC is in his pocket. My partner is in his pocket. Besides Agent Nadeem, in that hotel, I’m alone. No one protects me the way they protect him… If I lose my job, fine. If I lose my partner, okay. But I cannot stand to lose my loved ones.”

“Thank you, Agent.”

You and Ray were led out after that and you met with your friends in the hall. While Matt chatted with Ray, Foggy offered you a proud smile and moved to hug you but you simply pushed his hands away and began pacing a short distance. You pushed your fingers into your hair and tugged slightly on the ends.

Foggy looked over to Matt for help, but he was still in his conversation with Ray. Knowing that a win today would help ensure Matt stayed on the right track, Foggy decided not to cut in and talk to you on his own. He stepped in front of you and put his hands on your upper arms. You looked at him with your lips pressed together and your eyebrows up.

“Talk to me. What’s going on?” Your friend tried, ducking down to meet your eyes.

“It’s shot. The whole thing is shot.” You answered quietly, trying not to gain any more attention. “He didn’t just know about the trial.”

“What do you mean?”

“So what happens now?” Ray asked, drawing both Foggy’s and your attention. His brows furrowed but you stepped past him before he could speak.

You grabbed Matt’s arm and pulled him a couple steps away as Foggy answered Ray’s question.

You leaned in to speak quietly with your hand still gripping his arm and Matt’s hand landed on your elbow.

“What do you hear?” You asked softly.

His brows furrowed as he listened in, taking a step closer to the doors. As he focused, the grip he had on your arm tightened. You closed your eyes and cursed quietly.

“No, no, no.” Matt muttered and you nodded. “The jurors.”

“Fisk got to them.” You confirmed and opened your eyes, rolling your shoulders back and regaining your composure. “I felt it when we went in but I was hoping I was wrong.”

You glanced around the halls and felt a surge of emotions outside. Everyone still seemed entranced in Karen’s press conference. You had to give it to her, the woman was brave.

After a few anxiety ridden minutes, Tower came out of the courtroom with an apologetic expression as he passed your group. You opened your mouth to speak but he simply shook his head and headed to the cameras outside. You tapped your implant and listened in on the live broadcast from outside and you felt your stomach drop.

At this time, the grand jury had elected not to indict Wilson Fisk. But this office, under my leadership, will pursue every lead, every piece of evidence that leads us to uncovering the truth. The agents that testified today were incredibly brave and we encourage anyone with evidence regarding this case to come forward.

Everything outside continued to spike as you shut off your device and one familiar feeling stood out among the chaos.

“Karen.” You said to yourself as the boys began moving. You looked at them for a second before making a move to the doors. A hand closed around your arm and dragged you in the other direction.

“No, I have to-“ You groaned and tried to pull away but you were shoved forward instead. Looking over, you saw it was Matt who dragged you with him.

You took one last look over your shoulder before giving in and following the group. They hurried into the closest restroom and you locked the door behind you all. Ray pushed through and took a minute to himself while being quite literally sick to his stomach.

“It’s not gonna end like this, Ray. We’re not gonna let it.” Matt promised while leaning against the stalls.

Foggy stood by the sinks and you slid down with your back against the door until you were sitting up on your toes. You had elbows on your propped up knees and your chin resting behind your gently balled fists. Your eyes were trained on the floor, tracing the grout lines between the tiles.

Your brain was running through every scenario you could. You thought about whether or not he’d send Dex after you and Ray. It’d have to wait. There’s no way Dex could take you both out in a locked down courthouse. Would he go after Karen for her press conference? Or had he already wrecked her credibility? All you knew for sure was that it needed to end.

“The system will work.” Foggy ensured and you sighed to yourself. 

“You still believe that?” Matt scoffed and you looked up at him.

“Stop it.” You said quietly and he offered a sarcastic expression towards you.

“We’ve been here before. We can fix this.. Tower will impanel another grand jury and try again. We’re not done here. Right, Y/N?”

“What keeps Fisk away from them this time though?” You asked simply as you turned towards your friend. “I wanna do this the right way, Foggy, but it’s not looking too good for us.”

“I told you this would happen.” Matt cut in.

“Matt, stop.” You sighed and pushed yourself to stand. “Fighting each other isn’t gonna help.”

“I need to know where you’re going.” Foggy blocked Matt’s path.

“Guys.” You warned firmly as Matt said “I’m gonna find Tower. Make sure he tries again.”

“I’m going with you.” You offered and you saw him roll his eyes behind his glasses. “Unless there’s a problem?”

“No.” He said tightly. “No problem.”

“Good.” You nodded before leaning closer to Foggy. “Take care of him. Don’t let him lose his nerve.”

Your friend nodded and you grabbed Matt’s arm on the way out.

“God, y’know what, we should’ve just done it our way from the start.” Matt mumbled. 

“Our way?” You laughed. “This is our way. The other thing? That’s my way, Matthew. You’ll never be able to do it and it’s not a bad thing. You can’t force yourself to.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I almost wanna dare you to try because I know you won’t.”

“A lot has changed, Y/N.”

“Sure, but people don’t completely flip on their morals.” You scoffed.

“Maybe I did. You don’t know.”

“Actually I do, because you’re too strong to do it. You have a certain faith in people that you can’t learn. If you were capable of doing what I do, Dex wouldn’t be around anymore. You believe that people can do good. It’s not the worst ideology to hold on to.”

“Clearly not everyone can.”

You stopped walking and yanked his arm to stop him. He groaned and faced you, a tight grip on his cane and a clench to his jaw.

“This isn’t just about you!” You insisted. “You do understand that, right?”

“Of course I know that. You really think I don’t?”

“Why is it your responsibility then?”

“Because it is!”

“So why didn’t you work this hard to stop me?” You challenged quietly. “If not everyone can be better, why didn’t you try to kill me? I gave you every reason to give up on me, treat me this exact same way, but you never did.”

“You’re not the same, Y/N.” He sighed.

“Thankfully, neither are you and I. There’s always been someone taking people from me. Took my parents, Marc, Frank, Yelena and Nat, Billy, even you - twice - and Foggy, now Dex. I’m not gonna lose you a third time.”

“Y/N, I didn’t realize-“

“No, you never do. You never see beyond what you’re doing. You do this and there’s no coming back from it. Something in your heart is gonna change and you can’t change it back. You can’t undo it.”

“I’m sorry. I just want this to be over with.”

“I know but…” You sighed and looked around, shifting your weight between your feet.

You were hit with a sudden feeling of determination. You turned towards where it came from, the bathroom you left Foggy and Ray in. With a quiet curse, you hurried back, only to find Ray gone and Foggy knocked out.

You screamed out in frustration and slammed an angry fist into the mirror, watching it shatter and become stained with the bloody print of your knuckles. You pushed out of the room and back into the hall, scanning the crowds in an effort to find him. But you saw nothing.

Ray was gone. And the clock was ticking on what kind of countermove Fisk would make against him. Against all of you.

You practically ran out of the courthouse, pushing past various security and reporters. They shouted questions, mentioning your badge and asking what side you were testifying for, but ignored them all. Some yelled that you were working for Fisk, you were one of the corrupted agents, but all you offered them was the middle finger.

From there, you ran home. The sun was already setting and you were running out of time. You changed quickly and used your mask to scan as far as it could.

You had finally heard from Rick and you were talking to Seema while wandering the streets.

“Is he gonna be okay?” Seema asked towards the end of the conversation.

“I wish I could tell you for sure… But I can’t. What we’ve done has put a massive target on us and our loved ones. All I know is that yours and Sami’s safety is all he cares about.”

“Tell him I love him.”

“I will. When I find him, he’ll call for goodbyes and then you can send a pin to that number I gave you. After that, ditch the phone.”

It wasn’t until hours later did you find him.

He went home.

You practically sprinted through the neighborhood to get there. The front door was open, side gate cracked, and the police tape was stretched from someone pushing it aside. The house was empty but you could see two figures in the backyard.

“…I can help you cut a deal with the DA.” Ray tried. “We can take him down, us and Y/N.”

Dex gripped his gun tightly, though he hadn’t lifted it yet. His entire body was tense, practically vibrating with the anticipation of what he would do next. There was still a heavy apathy from Dex but there was an undercut of hesitation. Ray was still his friend, and that meant something to him. Not enough to change his mind, but something. Something you might be able to use against him.

“No.. That’s not gonna happen, Ray.” Dex shook his head with a small scoff.

“Dex.” You said carefully, pushing your mask up and lifting your hands in surrender. You walked slowly, putting yourself between the two former friends. “Think about this.”

“Move.” He answered tightly.

“I can help you, if you let me… Don’t make me your enemy, please.”

You tried to emphasize that hesitation but he would shove it back down as soon as it came up.

“I feel more myself than I have in my whole life. Fisk gave me that.”

“This isn’t you talking. This?” You gestured slightly between the two of you. “This is Fisk. He’s gotten in your head, Dex, and he’s turned us against each other. Don’t let him win! ”

“You don’t know me!” He shouted and you instinctively woke your Bite. “See?” He chuckled humorously. “You don’t really trust me.”

“What happened to the man that helped save my life?” You pressed gently with a pleading expression, taking a tentative step forward as you lowered your hands. Your devices still glowed at your wrists and Dex’s grip on his gun shifted. “At the carousel, remember? You rode with me in the ambulance, stayed at the hospital until I woke up. Where’s he?”

“That wasn’t me. It was you. It was your games.” He spat and your brows dropped and your jaw clenched.

“She cared about you, Dex.” Ray said from your side with a hand on your shoulder. “We both did. The only person that changed that was you.”

“Let me help you.” You tried that soft spot again. “I can’t do anything for you after this. I won’t.”

“I don’t care.” He shook his head and you nodded slightly, slowly moving a hand to reach one of the weapons at your belt. “I don’t need your help.”

“As long as I’m alive, my family’s at risk.” Ray admitted, though there was no hesitation.

Sadness, definitely, but it wasn’t any sudden revelation. Instead, it was acceptance. Understanding.

“Ray?” You asked over your shoulder.

“It’ll be alright.”

“Let’s go, Ray.” Dex said, lifting his gun. You sidestepped to put yourself in front of Ray again as you drew your own weapon. “Move, Y/N.”

There was a slight plea in his expression, though his body language didn’t falter.

Something human was left in Dex, some tiny flicker of light. Something like that used to be enough for Matt to believe in, to give them a chance to change. Without him honoring his own prior morals, you realized that was part of why you didn’t give up on Dex.

Not the sex or the friendship. But the hope, hope that months of running around with the altar boy vigilante attached to your hip pinned to your own conscience. The ability to see something good in someone so far off their path. You never understood that ideology until recently but now… Now it felt like that was your own code.

But clearly, the flicker wasn’t enough. And you couldn’t work by someone else’s morality.

“Thought you were good enough to shoot around me.” You taunted as you lined up your own gun.

“I’m not going anywhere with you, Dex.” Ray said and you felt that wave of acceptance again. “Whatever you need to do, you do it here.”

Ray had accepted his own death. And the only way you could stop it would be to kill Dex. You turned to face Ray, purposefully putting your body in front of his with the hopes that Dex wouldn’t shoot through.

“We can still get out of this.” You tried, feeling a deep regret settle in your stomach. “I can-“

“And do what, run? I can’t put my family through anything else, Y/N.”

“Ray, please. I can’t bring your family back to you if you’re in a body bag.”

“Hey.” He put a hand on your shoulder. “Just do this the right way, alright?”

“Seema wanted me to te-“

Before you could get the sentence out, the gun fired behind you. The bullet nicked your ear but hit its mark.

You backed away with unsteady legs while Ray fell to the ground with a bullet hole in his forehead. Your gun fell from your hands as you collapsed to your knees. Almost instantly your eyes watered as you stared at the now corpse of your friend. It was almost enough to make you scream as you sat beside the man that risked everything to stand up to Fisk, to stand up for what he believed in. To protect his family.

His family.

Your heart broke for Seema and Sami, and you thought about who would give them the news. The news that you had failed. You didn’t keep him safe.

“She loves you.” You said quietly as your entire body ran cold. “Seema wanted me to tell you she loves you.”

Your hand shook as you reached for your scar and pressed it, sliding along until you heard the dial tone.

“911, what is your emergency?”

“This is.. This is Exodus.” You spoke shakily with your accent, fighting to keep control as the tears fell down your cheeks. “I’m at.. Fisk had him killed. He’s- He’s dead. I need.. I need an ambulance or police or something. Just send someone!”

“Exodus? Okay um…” The line went quiet as the operator spoke to someone else on the side, probably asking advice with a vigilante on the line. “Where are you? Who’s dead?”

“Special-“ Your voice broke. “Special Agent Rahul Nadeem. He shot him in his own backyard.”

“Did you see who killed him?”

“No.. No, he was gone before I got here. I just heard the shot.”

“Okay. We have units en route. Can you stay with Mr.Nadeem until they arrive?”

“No, I- I have to go. They’ll arrest me. I- I have to- I have to go. I can’t be here when they arrive.”

“Wait.”

“He has a wife and a son. Just tell um, tell Detective Brett Mahoney to contact Nadeem’s legal team. Someone has to tell them.”

“Ma’am, please, just wait until-“

“I can’t… I can’t, I’m sorry.”

You ended the call and looked down at Ray.

“I’m sorry, Ray. I’m so sorry.”

You sat back for a moment to pull your knees to your chest. You wrapped your arms around them and rocked slightly as you let yourself cry. You tried to keep the noise down, but small wails left your throat. When you heard the sirens down the street, you had to pull yourself together and collect your gun. With one last look, you hopped the fence and made your way back to the apartment.

You tried to push the guilt away but it came back to gnaw at you. You should’ve just killed Dex. You shouldn’t have tried to reason with him. You should’ve taken him down when you got there. Why did you reveal yourself? Why didn’t you kill him? Why didn’t you do anything?

You had your own ways for a reason. Using Matt’s wouldn’t bring back the man you knew. And it wouldn’t save anyone.

Now Ray was dead and it was your fault.

All you could do was keep moving forward. But there was nothing more Y/N could do. The chance with the law and by the books was over. You wanted to stay on the path, to do things Foggy’s way - the right way - but you were at your wits end. Every time you tried to do things right, you lost. You wouldn’t lose again.

You wouldn’t dress yourself as Exodus to serve a villain. You wouldn’t dress as Exodus to serve the innocent. You would dress for revenge. You would dress to renew the sense of fear that your vigilante persona - just her name - used to invoke. To make Ben Poindexter pay for the lives he took. To make Wilson Fisk pay for the crimes he’d committed. And if they paid with their lives, so be it.

You wouldn’t be nice any longer. Both men had pushed you too far.

Killing people was easy. Making them suffer was an art, and you had spent years developing your craft. You would make them regret the moment you were made their enemy.

You ignored the phone calls from Foggy. His voicemails all said he needed to talk to you and he didn’t want to say it on a message, so you knew Brett told them what happened. Other numbers you didn’t recognize called but you ignored them too. Reporters, you figured.

On your way home, you were distracted by the distinct taste of fear. With a small noise of interest, you followed it. You weren’t necessarily shocked to see Matt was there at the source, but it was a surprise to see him with Felix Manning.

“Should’ve called.” You told him as you got to his side.

“Didn’t have time.” He shrugged with that smirk he always used to have back when you found him when you two didn’t know each other’s identities. When things were a lot simpler. “You hear what happened?“

“To Nadeem? How we fucked it up, again.”

“Yeah.” He answered in a whisper.

You nodded quietly and he frowned slightly. He reached for your arm but you crossed them over your chest and peered over the edge, looking at the knot that held Manning’s ankle. You gave the rope a small shake and the man screamed with a new wave of panic.

“What have you gotten so far?” You turned to Matt, though the mask did little to hide his expression. “Stop looking at me like that.”

He opened his mouth for a joke but you smacked his arm before he could get a word out. He laughed quietly and put his hands up in surrender.

“Fisk’s gathering a bunch of figureheads for a wedding.” Matt explained.

“Vanessa’s gonna marry him?” Your brows furrowed and Matt gave a nonchalant shrug. You leaned over the edge and yelled to Manning. “Do we get an invite?”

All he could do was scream.

“Sounds like a no.” Matt answered and you almost smiled, though Manning’s screams were rather distracting.

You groaned loudly before reaching forward. You made a small pulling motion and felt the fear draw out of him. The yellow smoke came to your hand and swirled up your arm and you felt the tingle down your spine as you absorbed it.

“I can give you something better.” Manning called from the end of the rope.

You hummed in interest and climbed to sit on the ledge, feet kicking idly as Matt sat beside you with his ankles crossed. If it hadn’t been for the man dangling just a few feet down, it would’ve been a nice moment together.

“We’re listening.” Matt said simply.

“I witnessed Ms. Marianna order the murder of Agent Nadeem. And Fisk ordered many!” He shouted and you felt a new wave of anger run down your spine. You ground your teeth and balled your hands into fists. Matt’s hand came up to your jaw and pressed gently on the joint to make you release the tension. You made a small noise and took his hand off your face, holding it between your own and dropping into your lap. “Agent Winn. Julie Barnes. I could testify!”

“Где был этот парень раньше?” You muttered and Matt nudged you with his shoulder. “Мог бы позволить ему умереть вместо Рэя.” (Where was this guy earlier? Could’ve let him die instead of Ray.)

“Будь милым.” Matt said with light amusement in his voice. He knew what happened to Ray upset you and he figured you would blame yourself. But at least your words were what he was used to. “Мы могли бы его использовать.” (Be nice. We could use him.)

“Hang on..” You realized and peered over the edge. “We know Winn and Nadeem. Did you say Julie Barnes?”

“Yes! Yes, he did!”

You let out a laugh in celebration and the sound seemed misplaced in the current situation. That was exactly what you had been waiting for. Confirmation. Confirmation of the one thing that could snap Dex, in every sense of the word. Confirmation that Julie Barnes, the woman that he had been obsessing over since before you met him, was dead and that Fisk was to blame.

“Help me get him up.” You told Matt quickly as you climbed back to the roof.

“Why?” Matt asked, though he followed suit.

“Ты хотел подтолкнуть Декса на грань? Вот как мы это делаем.” You answered quickly and he nodded quietly. (You wanted to push Dex to the brink? This is how we do it.)

You got Manning to tell you everything you needed to know about Julie. How she was killed. Where she was killed. Where her body currently was. Everything you needed to throw in Dex’s face and break whatever was left.

A day or two later, you were standing at a press conference at the bureau. It was an official statement regarding Ray and Agent Winn’s deaths. Hattley claimed Ray was mentally unstable, that Karen was a liar and the alleged 911 call from Exodus was fake. You almost laughed when Hattley had to redirect questions about Exodus finding the body, but she admitted it was an agent who killed him, under the guise of self-defense.

You tried to duck out of the office following the press conference but a hand wrapped around your arm tightly. You let out a small wince when you were yanked back before you were redirected and pushed towards one of the conference rooms. You were able to yank your arm free just outside the door, where you saw Seema sitting inside.

“What the hell is this?” You asked sharply as you spun on Dex. “You wanna rub salt in her wounds?”

“She came to us, said she wants to see Ray’s lawyers.” He explained simply.

“So what?”

“So call them.”

“Why? So you can put a bullet in them too?”

“If you don’t, I’ll put a bullet in you.”

“You should’ve done it last time. Too late now.”

“Really wanna do this here?” His brows raised. You glanced around, noting the mostly empty hall. The only other agents were ones you remembered seeing at that meeting. You were outnumbered and while you could likely handle the ordeal, a shoot out in the office wasn’t something you wanted to instigate with everything else you had going on. “You’re so paranoid, Y/N/N. I’ll call him myself. Not like anyone’s gonna hurt him.” Dex smirked and began to back away.

“Dex.” You called out and he paused, allowing you to move closer. “Are you happy now? Ray’s dead. Seema and Sami are alone. Fisk is getting married. Daredevil’s image is shot… Is that what you wanted?”

He chuckled weakly and nodded. “I thought all this empathy crap was done.”

You gave a weak shrug. It wasn’t even an attempt to change his mind. It was just you being an asshole. “One last shot, I guess… Maybe you were right after all. You don’t love me, not anymore at least. You’re incapable of loving anyone, of feeling anything.”

“Careful, Y/N. You’re getting predictable.” He tapped a finger under your chin and left.

You huffed a sigh and shot a quick text to Foggy, asking him to come to the bureau. You headed back to the main office and began busying yourself with some paperwork until your friend arrived.

A sharp whistle drew your attention and you looked up to see Dex waving you over. You got to his side as Foggy lifted his phone to take a picture, one you were just in time to smile for.

“Posted to my campaign webpage, and the tens of thousands of police officers that know that I’m here. With you. Helping.” Foggy said firmly and you tried to hide the proud smile.

“Relax, Mr. Nelson. You’re not in any danger.” Dex said lowly, a hand landing on your lower back that you almost jumped away from. “Agent Y/L/N even came to help put you at ease.”

You jammed an elbow into his ribs and he laughed slightly.

“Besides, you’ll be very useful when you’re the next district attorney.”

“Why am I here?” Foggy looked to you.

“Because you and Ray were friends.” Dex answered instead and you rolled your eyes.

“If you’re expecting him to answer questions, it’ll break privilege, even if the client’s dead.” You explained.

“I’m not asking him to.” It was Dex’s turn to roll his eyes. “Follow me.”

Dex led you and Foggy back to the room where you saw Seema waiting. You wanted to offer her a sincere apology, to comfort her and admit that it was your fault Ray was dead, but Hattley’s presence made you keep those thoughts to yourself.

“We’ll give you the room. Take all the time you need.” Hattley said after a brief exchange between Dex and Seema.

“I’m sorry for your loss.” You managed and she looked at you with slight tears in her eyes. “Ray was a good man.”

Dex’s hand fit tightly to your elbow and he dragged you away. You all left Foggy with Seema and stepped back into the hall.

“Suck it up.” Dex sneered.

“I’m only doing this because I have to.” Hattley snapped back before the two split ways. You let out a sigh and headed back to your desk.

You decided you were going to leave again at lunch, figuring your time at that job was limited anyway so why be a good agent anymore. You had just dropped into your chair, a small cloud of blue proofing out as you did, when Dex grabbed your arm and hauled you away again. You sucked in a breath between gritted teeth and you knew there’d be a bruise there by the end of the day. When you two got to a secluded area, he pushed you against the wall and put his call on speaker. He held a hand against your mouth and your brows furrowed, though you showed no other reaction. You decided against fighting back, knowing it would be more trouble than it was worth.

Plus, you were intrigued.

“I’ve got some free time now. Why don’t we meet up?” Dex said, keeping eye contact with you while pressing that forearm against your chest near your throat as a threat.

“I have a question.” Matt’s voice came from the other side and your eyes went a bit wider. Dex offered a slight smirk as he caught your expression. “Did you enjoy the feeling you got when you killed those birdies? Is that why you’re still killing?”

“Birdies?”

“The ones you killed with rocks. I bet it felt good at first, right?”

“Stop.” You tried, your voice muffled from behind Dex’s hand and he pushed your head to bang against the wall.

“Then it’s never the same after that.”

You put one hand on his chest and the other on his wrist and tried to push Dex off. He growled slightly and pressed harder, causing you to release a small noise when the pressure hit your chest and then a sharp sensation erupted from your still healing stab wound.

“Who was that?” Matt asked suddenly.

“Your little girlfriend.” Dex taunted and you struggled against him, but he leaned into you with more of his body weight. “She’s a pretty little thing, isn’t she? ‘Specially when she’s helpless.”

“What do you think Dr. Mercer would say if she could see you now?” Matt continued and you sighed. You wondered if he was purposefully not showing a reaction or if it just didn’t bother him.

You leaned back into the wall and Dex noticed your shift away from him. Dex’s eyes darted between yours but you knew yours were empty. There was no feeling behind your eyes when you looked at Dex, and he recognized that. He recognized that you no longer saw him the same.

Slowly he leaned away but held a finger to his lips to gesture for you to keep quiet. Maybe it actually hurt him for you to give up on him.

Good.

“Got a second?” He spoke finally. “I need a tissue for all the tears I’m crying over my shitty childhood.”

“Have you heard from your friend Julie lately?”

“Что ты делаешь?” You whispered as your brows furrowed, trying to figure out Matt’s plan. You two had talked about bringing it up to Dex together so you could guarantee neither of you were at risk. Why do it now? (What are you doing?)

“You wanna talk to Dr. Mercer, asshole? Keep talking. Or I could send your girlfriend instead.”

“What do you think she’d say if she knew about the innocent people you killed?” Matt continued. “I bet she’d be disappointed, Dex.”

“If she was still alive.” You mumbled.

Dex’s attention snapped to you and a hand was quick to come around your throat to force you back against the wall. The air left your lungs while his hand gripped you tighter and you cursed Matt for starting problems.

“If you hurt Julie-“ He threatened lowly and lifted so your feet could barely reach the ground.

“I never touched her.” You choked out. “She was innocent.”

“Did he?”

“Fisk had her killed. He knew what she meant to you so he killed her, gave himself a chance to replace her as your North Star.” You answered quickly.

He was quiet for a moment while he took in your expression. When he believed you weren’t lying, he eased off.

“When he realized he couldn’t kill me, he went after her… She was an easy mark. I'm sorry. There was nothing I could do.” You added while rubbing your tender throat and he gave a slow nod.

“Don’t tell me that’s sympathy in your voice, Ex.” Matt said.

“Shut up.” You snapped quickly.

“Don’t feel bad for a guy who’s tried to kill us both, multiple times.”

“Shut. Up. It’s not about him.”

“You should stick to beating on people in alleys, cause you’re not gonna get in my head.” Dex said tightly, though you could feel something underlying in his words. It almost felt like.. grief.

Maybe there was something more than a flicker left in Dex. But that wouldn’t change anything. It couldn’t.

“You don’t have to believe us.. Then again, you may wanna ask how I got Manning’s phone.”

“Don’t know, don’t care.” Dex answered sharply.

“Julie wouldn’t approve of your killing people, Dex.”

“Stop. Saying. Her name.” Dex practically growled. The familiar heart of his rage hit you. The soft spot he had for you may have faded away, but he’d always feel a certain way for Julie.

“You said you got some free time? You may wanna check out 16 Canal Place.”

“Why?”

The line cut out after that. Dex slowly turned to face you and your sidestepped carefully to ensure your back was no longer against the wall.

“What’s at Canal Place?” He asked tightly.

“Julie…” You answered quietly. Beneath the surface you were adding to the pressure of his anger, trying to break him. “I’m sorry, Dex. I know she was important to you.”

“What the hell is your deal?” He asked angrily and you took another step back. “What- What- What do you gain from all of this?”

“I had no part in this.” You countered firmly, forgetting about your game for a moment. “All of this-“ You gestured between you two. “-was done without me knowing.”

“Bullshit.” He scoffed.

“I wouldn’t taunt you with this. You know me better than that.”

“Do I?”

“Don’t believe me then.” You shrugged. “I don’t care anymore. I tried being nice, didn’t work. I tried being a bitch, kind of working. I tried empathy, didn’t work.” You pushed past him.

“Where are you going?” He called after you.

“Away from you.”

That night, you took a trip to Canal Place dressed in your latest, modified vigilante costume - compression shirt and vest. You still hadn’t patched your full suit and top. You arrived a few minutes ahead of Dex, but he wasn’t your point. You made your way to the roof and found Matt already there. You made sure to keep your distance, knowing you’d punch him in the teeth if you got too close.

“Wanna tell me what the hell that was on the phone?” You asked simply.

“I knew he wasn’t gonna hurt you.” Matt reasoned as he pulled the black mask off.

“That’s not the point. We were gonna do it together.”

“I needed to make sure.”

“Of what?”

“That you hadn’t gone soft.”

“So you play with my life?”

“C’mon, Y/N/N.” He scoffed. “He wasn’t gonna kill you.”

“The bruise around my neck says otherwise.” You countered angrily.

His body language shifted and you saw the flex of his hand. He ran a stressed hand over his mouth before he spoke again.

“You said it yourself. He loves you.”

“No, he doesn’t.”

“That’s not what-“

“Well I was wrong.” You cut in quickly.

“You’re never wrong about this stuff.”

“You think that excuses any of that?” You laughed and moved closer. “You think that excuses you pushing him when I’m the one that would’ve had to deal with the fallout?”

“You could’ve protected yourself if he tried anything.”

“So that’s it? You put me in the line of fire and taunt the most unstable man I’ve ever met, just because you can? Just because I can fight back.”

“Were you honestly afraid?” He asked carefully, head cocking in interest.

You thought about the interaction and didn’t remember feeling afraid. In fact, you felt completely in control without touching your abilities in that regard.

“He felt something.” You said instead. “When you talked about Julie… Grief.”

“So what?”

“So that means there might still be something worth saving in him. That used to be what you stood for, Matt. That chance used to be enough.”

“Oh come on.” He scoffed. “What happened to the woman that was ready to kill him?”

“And what happened to the man that didn’t wanna kill anyone? What happened to the altar boy that believed everyone could change, that just a small piece of goodness was enough for another chance? Where’s the man from that rooftop with Frank, who had a gun to his head, but still insisted on preaching about giving people a chance to change?”

“What do you want me to do, huh?” He asked loudly. “You want me to- to take the guy to therapy? Hold his hand and promise it’ll be okay? The guy’s psycho! And he’s dangerous.”

Your remark was cut off by a loud scream. A sound of pure agony that you almost swore was accompanied by the sharp sound of a snap and a shaky wave of heat. It was an uneven, broken feeling that had bits of cold air weaved in between. It was as if the anger was cracking and the sadness was patching the gaps.

You turned to face Matt again but he was already holding a ringing phone in front of him. You took a few steps closer.

“When I find you…” Dex threatened lowly.

“Like we said, Fisk killed her and we all know it.” Matt countered smoothly.

“Think about it, Dex.” You added on. “Who got Julie the job in the hotel, right after the detail starts? Who started following you? It’s all been Fisk.”

“You let him turn you into a murderer!” Matt kept going. You knew you should stop him, that he was pushing too hard. You started to feel a bit of regret for what you had to do to Dex, but you also knew you needed him to turn against Fisk.

Besides, you didn’t owe him anything anymore.

“He wasn’t gonna let someone like Julie get in the way of that.” You offered, gentler than the venom Matt spoke with. 

“Why are you telling me this?” Dex asked lamely, as if everything he had - everything that mattered - was gone. And for him, maybe it was.

“Aw, Dex..” You said quietly, more to yourself than either of the boys. Matt scoffed lightly and stepped away, adding a comment about Fisk and the wedding before ending the call.

“You can’t tell me that you really care about him still.” Matt said angrily. “After everything he’s done to us.”

“I’m allowed to feel bad for ruining a man’s entire mental state just to take down a different man.” You answered sarcastically. “Regardless if I care about him or not.”

“You didn’t ruin that guy. There was hardly anything to ruin.”

“There used to be..”

“Who’s side are you on, Y/N? Because you can’t have everything.”

“No, but I can remember the guy he was before. Matt, he helped save my life, kept me from bleeding out on the way to the hospital.”

“That makes up for everything. Why didn’t you mention it sooner?” He offered sarcastically.

“Why are you so bitter?” You shouted. “You have everyone back and it’s still not enough.”

He simply shook his head.

“Why are you so hell bent on destroying him?”

“He killed Father Lantom!” Matt screamed, new anger rolling off him. “But that doesn’t matter, right? Because he lost someone too.”

“That’s not what I’m saying! I cared about Lantom, too.”

“Not like I did.”

“Okay, I’ll give you that, but-“

“But nothing. Just because you slept with him doesn’t make him worth anything.”

“Say that again.” You said lowly, your head tilting with a slight challenge. Your muscles tightened and your hands flexed as you crossed your arms to wake the devices around your wrists. “I dare you.”

He sighed heavily and lifted his hands in surrender.

“Y’know, you’re making it so hard to want to help you. And at this point, I don’t know if you’re doing it on purpose or if you are just that pathetic now.”

“I’m pathetic… Okay.” He mumbled with a scoff before turning away from you.

“I may be a bitch and I may be a killer, but at least I don’t willingly treat people that love me like shit. At least I feel bad when I’ve hurt someone I used to care about… But I guess you just don’t care anymore, right? You left your conscience under Midland, right?”

“You know that’s not true.” He sighed, almost visibly deflating. “I’m doing this because I-“

“Don’t give me that shit.” You cut in firmly, taking quick strides to stand in front of him. “I’m so goddamn tired of that excuse from you, Matt.” Your finger jammed into his chest. “You’re not protecting anyone by being an asshole.. All you’re doing is becoming exactly what you want to protect this city from. You’re becoming what Exodus used to be. Now I look like the soft one. The weak one.”

“I never said that.”

“You didn’t have to! Jesus Christ, how many times do we have to have this same conversation before it gets through your head?” You tapped his temple quickly before pushing his head away.

“I understand that we’re different now. I never said we could go back to what we were. You’re the one who said you can’t have both.”

“I never said that.”

“In the van with Ray. You said that you had to give up certain people and you looked right at me.”

“For the love of..” You muttered before a disbelieving laugh. “I wasn’t saying that I wanted to give you up. I meant that you gave us up. You won’t let yourself have it both ways.”

“Right, because you’re not one to self-sabotage to try torture yourself? You- You don’t ruin anything good in your life to try and make up for all the bad shit you’ve done?”

You stood in silence for a moment, mouth opening to defend yourself but your voice keeping quiet. You wanted to talk back, to tell him that he was an idiot. You wanted to scold him for not truly understanding why you had done everything you had, why you had sabotaged so many relationships in the past. But that was what he wanted. He wanted to keep egging you on that way, maybe you’d be pissed off enough to be like the old you. The one who was so angry with the way the world was that you were going to kill anyone you thought would fix it. And as tempting as it was, as justified as you felt your anger would be, someone needed to keep a level head.

But also, it wasn’t for his sake. It was Ray’s voice lingering in the back of your mind, serving as the safety on your otherwise unrelenting trigger finger.

Just do this the right way, alright?

“Whatever. Think what you want about me.” You shrugged and your devices disarmed. He must’ve heard the current shut off because his brows raised with interest. “I’m gonna go patch my suit and head to the Presidential. If I see you, you better have your goddamn head on straight.”

“Держись подальше от меня сегодня вечером.” He said simply, causing a small scoff from your chest. (Stay out my way tonight.)

“Забавно. Я собирался сказать тебе то же самое.” (Funny. I was going to tell you the same thing.)

You headed home after that, ignoring whatever snarky comment he made when you turned your back. You got home quickly and pulled your suit from the closet. It was the first time you had seen it since the attack on the church. The blood was still soaked into the fabric, the gaping hole in the center. It brought you back to that night and the scar on your stomach burned.

You pushed through it and gave it a thorough wash before repairing the damage, not perfectly but enough to get through the night. You fit it in place and zipped the familiar top over it. As you were sliding your gloves on, you found the small insignias you had carved into the forearm plates. A small skull and two overlapping D’s.

Matt and Frank, Punisher and Daredevil. The two men that were able to sneak through your guards and understand who you were. The two men who knew what you stood for and stood beside you.

The two most important people left in your life.

You fit the rest of your equipment on; boots, Bites, belt, staff pack, and mask. You thought a lot on your way to the hotel. You thought about your relationships with Dex and Matt.

There was no way to repair the damage between you and Dex. You wouldn’t be friends or anything romantic when the night ended. The latter you could deal with, but losing the former was a bit of a bummer. Dex was damaged and your influence probably made it worse. You had a hand in breaking whatever structure and balance Dex had. You used him as a pawn in your game with Fisk and he was ultimately the one to suffer.

You and Matt had been back and forth since he came back. One night he’s begging you to stay and the next he tries to make you the bad guy for being human - for being exactly what he wanted you to be when you had first met. Despite that, despite his uncharacteristic bloodlust as of late, you couldn’t turn your back on him.

You still loved him, after all.

You moved through the parking garage with ease. You came across an abandoned SUV and when you went to check it, you instantly regretted it. In the passenger seat sat Julie’s frozen corpse.

“We really did it this time, didn’t we?” You mumbled to yourself before you heard the groans of the nearby agent on the ground. You moved to his side and grabbed his face to turn him towards you.

“Where’d he go?” You asked firmly, to which he continued his pained sounds. “Where is Poindexter?” You urged again.

He pointed weakly towards the door to the stairwell so you left him on the floor and began your climb. As you climbed, you called Matt.

But he didn’t answer.

You tapped your mask to track the microphone you had left him with and saw he was already a few levels ahead of you. You blew out a sigh and decided to call Foggy instead.

“Hey.” He said with a relieved sigh. “Please tell me-“

“He’s already here.. They both are.” You cut in as you leaned over the bar to angle a shot for your wire towards one of the higher railings. “I’m on my way to them.”

“You have to stop him, Ex.”

You smiled to yourself as your wire looped around the metal. You climbed over and began a quicker ascend.

“Well I’ve tried that, a lot, and it’s not working.” You said simply, mentally counting off floors as you passed. “We need to try something different.”

“Like what?”

“Like a bluff.”

“A bluff?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay… I’m not following.”

“Clearly.” You mumbled as you swung your feet over the final railing. “What I’m saying is what if I stay out of his way.”

“You wanna let him do it?”

“You really think he will?” You asked simply as you unwrapped and tucked away your wire.

“Right now, I don’t know what he’ll do.”

“The guy we know is still in there.. I know it sounds crazy but it’ll work. He wouldn’t know whether I mean it or not. He can’t read me the way he reads everyone else. I don’t let him.”

He was quiet for a moment, likely getting Karen’s opinion.

“But what if it doesn’t work? What if.. we lose him forever?” 

“You gotta trust me.”

“I do but… Is it worth the risk of losing him?”

“I get it. But I don’t see any other option. He has to see for himself that he’s too good to do it.”

“If he can’t, are you going to?”

“Not unless I have to.”

“Will you stop him?”

“I don’t know.”

You ended the call, not allowing any other argument from Foggy. Instead, you pushed into the hall and practically sprinted to the ceremony. As you were coming up on the doors, your implant picked up on Ray’s voice. You didn’t know what it was, some sort of deathbed confession maybe, but it made your chest tight.

As you moved, you passed agent after agent on the ground. Labored breathing or groans of pain came from the bodies and you were moderately relieved that they weren’t dead. At least he had some restraint left, whichever one did all of it.

“I’d like to make a toast.” Dex said shakily from the stage as you entered the ballroom. “Julie and I wish you the absolute best.”

Dex pulled back to throw the microphone so you sprung into action. A serving tray came flying in front of Fisk and the microphone bounced off as you were passing by. Dex looked between you and who you assumed was Matt. You noticed his attention on something behind you and you turned just in time to see the agents lift their guns.

You dropped to the floor and ducked behind one of the tables. When the shots faltered you came out and hopped the table. With both hands on the surface, you kicked out and sent one agent falling into the one behind him. You took a disc from your belt and tossed it, highly charged bolts shooting out of the small device at the two agents. They fell with tight convulsions before Dex threw silverware that landed in their necks.

Matt took off and you were quick to follow him, leaving Dex and the remaining agents in the ballroom. The gunshots echoed throughout the halls as you ran and it sent a chill down your spine.

You noticed the annoyed shake of Matt’s head but you said nothing. You followed him up to the room that covered Fisk’s control center.

He burst in first with you close behind. He acted quickly and threw one of the men towards you. You reacted instantly and pulled a staff. You had to duck his flailing arms so you swung the weapon to knock his legs from under him. Once the agent fell to his back, you slammed the weapon against his temple. You flicked out the blade and moved at the agent Matt threw to the sofa.

Acting quickly, you slammed the blade through his shoulder and pin him to the furniture while you woke your Bites. Aiming one at the man beside you and one over Matt’s shoulder, you fired both and the men fell limp.

As Matt spoke to the woman, you recollected your weapon and placed it back in the pack.

“Подо��ди.” You called as Matt was headed to the stairs. (Wait.)

“Don’t try to stop me either, Ex.” He said tightly.

“Я не собирался.” You offered but he turned away from you. You groaned and moved forward, grabbing his arm to force him to stay put. “Я просто хотел сказать, что я с тобой... Что бы ты ни решил сделать.” (I wasn’t going to. I just wanted to say that I’m with you… Whatever you decide to do.)

“Правда?” He asked carefully, a hand handing on your arm and his fingers landing between the plates. “И если я действительно убью его?” (Really? And if I actually kill him?)

You gave a small smile as your other hand landed on his chest, right over his heart. You heard the door close as the woman ran off.

“Whatever you decide.” You said honestly.

He offered a small smirk before taking his hand off your arm and moving it to your neck. Before you could voice a question, his opposite hand slid the zipper down a few inches so the fingers on your neck could move under the collar of your suit.

“Tell me one more time.” He said lowly and for just a second, it was like old times. “Just to be sure.”

With a small smile, you let your meticulous control drop. For the first time in months, you were completely vulnerable. Every emotion, every physiological reaction, every tell you could possibly have, it was all on the table for Matt to read. And he knew it.

“I’m on your side, Matty. No matter what.” You said truthfully. And you knew the night would end in a way that favored you and your friends.

He gave a small smile and let out a sigh of relief. His hand went to the back of your neck and he pulled you closer. The other arm looped around your waist and your arms came loosely around him.

You fixed your mental guards and allowed a moment to survey what Matt was feeling. There was tension in his muscles, likely anticipatory for what was to come once you entered that suite. He was determined but also worried. There was an underlying excitement, the subtle type he always seemed to get before a fight. There was also a hint of confusion.

That was what you were looking for. Something to pull to the surface that could interfere with his initial plans.

Slipping a mental hook into that feeling, you pulled away and tapped his arm to follow you. You moved up the stairs and zipped your shirt the rest of the way up. When you hit the door to the suite, you woke your Bites and gripped one of your blades tightly. Matt’s hand landed on your lower back and when you turned to him, he gave you a quick nod.

You took a steadying breath before opening the door and walking in, ensuring your head was high as Matt followed behind you. As you entered the hall, Fisk and Vanessa came from the other end.

The tension in the air grew thicker with every breath. Fisk’s eyes went wide for a minute, flicking to the gleaming blade in your hand and the ominous red glow of your favored devices. Vanessa swallowed hard and took a fearful step back to try and hide behind her new husband.

“It’s over.” Matt said lowly, the familiar gravelly voice of the Devil coming through.

“Run.” Fisk said to Vanessa, pushing her back the way they came.

“This ends.” You warned with words tinted in your accent.

Fisk snarled slightly before bracing himself. Matt shifted beside you and your stance widened while you shifted your weight to your toes. They screamed at each other before they charged, Matt slamming into Fisk with enough force for them both to crash into something in the bedroom. You hurried in the same direction and caught Vanessa trying to race down the stairs.

You wouldn’t kill her, only sparing her life to fulfill your promise to Ray, but you’d have some fun in the meantime.

You flung your knife and watched the tip bury itself in her dress and pin it to the floor. As you were coming around the ledge, Matt and Fisk crashed through the wall. You were going to intervene but Matt fought back so you turned back to Vanessa.

You gripped the railings on either side and kicked both feet into her side. The sharp rip of fabric sounded as she tumbled down the stairs with loud exclamations. You recollected your blade and hopped the railing to follow her just as Matt sent Fisk tumbling the same way.

You landed in time to see Vanessa backing away from the door, a familiar bitter taste settling in your tongue. You spit on the floor in an effort to clear it but it lingered as you saw Dex enter the room.

You groaned inwardly as your small crowd seemed to freeze at his appearance. When it seemed no one else would move, you did. You moved around the table to put yourself in front of the bride.

As you rounded the table, you placed a hand on the ledge to allow you room to spin your legs and connect both feet with Dex’s jaw. He reached angrily for you but you threw yourself backwards. From the far end of the table, you saw Matt land from the upper level and move in against Dex.

You slid off the table and dropped to a low crouch. You snuck beside Vanessa and kicked her legs from underneath her. You pinned a knee against her chest and aimed one of your devices. You angled for a well-placed shot that would hurt but not kill her, only to be thrown off by Matt’s off balance body.

You groaned in annoyance and shoved your partner off you. In your own lull of action, you heard Fisk and Dex going at it from the other end of the room. You paused for a second to watch, only to realize that your former partner had little to no defense against Fisk. The best he could do was evade and try to put distance and gain an advantage.

He was sloppy, uncaring even. He wasn’t just broken. He has completely fallen apart.

You looked between a still fallen Vanessa and the quick paced fight ahead and decided on something more exciting. When Fisk threw Dex against the stairs, you inserted yourself.

You grabbed both staffs before getting to the side of Fisk. You stepped up the railing and reached around his neck to cross both sticks. You quickly moved your feet to be on the back end of the plexiglass and extended the limbs, holding tight with your staffs to pull the man off Dex. His ragged coughs drew an old, sadistic smile from you and the manic daze you knew all too well began to cloud your mind.

From the corner of your eye, you saw Dex stand and attempt to charge at you and Fisk. With a quick move, you jumped the railing and dug an elbow into Fisk’s spine for stability. When Dex was close enough, you slammed both feet into his chest. The impact sent him stumbling through the glass behind him and you were pushed the other direction.

When you hit the ground, you released the cross of your staffs and snuck between Fisk’s legs. You hooked a stick around either ankle and pulled forward as you slid your other leg through so you would spin to face him as he fell to his back. One staff was returned to the pack as you flicked out the long blade of the other.

“Ты больше никому не обидишь” You said simply and you placed a foot on his stomach. (You’ll never hurt anyone else again.)

You gripped your weapon with both hands and lifted it high above your head, the tip of the blade on a direct path to his chest. You let out a loud scream, one born out of pent up rage and pain that seemed to add heat to the blade in your hand, while you began to drive the knife down.

As your blade was mere inches from penetrating, you were slammed into from your side. The collision sent you rolling and your staff clattered from your hands. You heard the commotion continue and you pushed yourself to your elbows to see Fisk and Matt back in a fight, Matt getting body slammed through the table.

For a second, you hoped it would knock some sense into him. But that thought was shortly entertained because you were yanked to your feet by your hair.

You were spun roughly and a hand fit your throat, backing you up until you hit the wall. You let out a manic laugh when you saw it was Dex.

“Was it worth it?” You sneered. “Killing Julie.”

“I didn’t kill her.” He nearly screamed in your face before slamming you back again.

“But you did.” You nodded fervently. “If you didn’t try to make her love you-“

His free hand collided with the brick near your head and you acted quickly.

You grabbed the wrist around your throat and braced a foot at the bend of his hip. Your thumb dug into the space between bones at his wrist and he winced as his grip faltered. You stepped up using his own leg as leverage and hooked the other leg around his shoulder. You balled one fist in the suit material of the base of his neck and pulled to reveal enough skin that you could wedge you let Bite against. You fired the device and he yelled loudly while his hands gripped the back of your knees.

He slammed your body into the hard brick wall and you coughed roughly as the impact sent a jolt through the old fracture in your ribs. He pulled back to slam you again but you pulled the foot you had against his leg to flatten against the wall and change the angle of your body.

You slid your hands to grip the suit before kicking off and throwing yourself to the floor while Dex landed beside you. You quickly knelt on top of Dex and landed heavy hits to his face, forcing head to bounce off the ground. One of his hands were flailing to find something to use as a weapon and before you could block, he found your other staff and swung it at your jaw. You fell off and got to your hands and knees before he threw your staff at the glass chandelier above where Matt and Fisk were fighting.

Matt was quick to get out of the way, which left Fisk vulnerable to Dex’s barrage of attacks. You hurried over to the wreckage and recollected your staff before you decided what to do next. Dex’s focus shifted to Matt, which allowed you to go after Fisk. You turned to find him and saw him give Vanessa his jacket, a product of Melvin’s handiwork you assumed.

She met your eyes in a panic as you jumped the couch and began your assault. You alternated your hits, switching hands and angles. You mixed in body shots and elbows and knees. Vanessa’s hand landed on your shoulder and you reacted almost instantly.

You grabbed her wrist and twisted her arm outwards. You hooked a foot behind her ankle and slammed your other arm against her chest to knock her to the floor. She coughed heavily from the impact and you reached down for your knife. You smiled as you pressed the tip against the underside of her chin.

“You had Ray killed.” You spoke lowly, a heavy venom dripping from your accented words. “I should kill you for it.”

“But you won’t?” She managed, jerking under your weight in a desperate attempt to get you off of her.

“I do enjoy revenge.” Your head tilted as you pierced the skin slightly and you watched the steady stream of blood across her skin. “But using you to torture him is much more fun.”

You heard Fisk’s heavy footsteps behind you so you moved quickly. You quickly jumped to your feet and dragged Vanessa up with you, locking an arm around her throat while other held the tip of the knife against her sternum,

“Let her go, Y/N.” Fisk said carefully, hands out in front as if to soothe a wild animal. “She’s done nothing.”

“You consider Rahul Nadeem nothing?” You spoke sharply, pressing the knife a bit harder to hear a sharp gasp from Vanessa. “What do you say, hmm? A life for a life.”

“You don’t trade lives!”

“Исход делает.” You shrugged. (Exodus does.)

The loud shatter of glass beside you stole your attention for a second, but it was all Fisk needed. He yanked your hand away from his wife’s chest and pushed her away. With a tight grip on your wrist, he bent it back to point your own knife back at you. He backed you against the wall and you had to use your other hand to keep your own weapon away. His fingers locked around your own, not allowing you to drop your blade.

With a sly smile, you allowed your powers to reach out to the boys that came crashing through the window moments ago. You found that soft spot they both had for you, one was much easier to find than the other, and you yanked it to the surface. You projected a fear, a helplessness, while refusing to break eye contact with Fisk,

“You have no power here.” You said quietly as you heard the glass shifting. “You’ll lose.”

“Not until I’ve buried you.” He spoke roughly, pushing the knife again and you felt the tip poking through your suit and into your shoulder.

“I’m not afraid to die.”

You let your other hand drop and the knife pierced your shoulder completely with a sharp cry of pain. At the same time, two glass shards came flying in and punctured his abdomen. You offered a salute to Dex as a way of thanking him before Matt began an offense against him again. You turned back to Fisk as he pulled the bloody glass out.

You made a small noise of interest as you moved in, momentarily forgetting about the knife in you. You threw a sharp kick at the open wound and he cried out. You laughed slightly and kicked again. And again.

You reached forward and pressed your knuckles against the wound and watched the blood spurt across your hand. You pulled back and grabbed the man by his face, the other grabbing his shirtfront, and slammed him to the ground.

“You’re pathetic.” You sneered. “You’re nothing without your toys.”

You saw Dex fall from the corner of your eye and when you glanced, you saw him already locked in on Vanessa. You groaned to yourself and pushed off Fisk, hurrying up the stairs to yank Vanessa out of the way. The ceramic ashtray flew by your heads and shattered against the wall. You gripped Vanessa by her throat and threw her back against the plexiglass, leaning a knee into her chest to pin her down.

You turned back to the fight in time to see Fisk slam Dex into the corner of the brick. Your pressure on Vanessa eased slightly as something dropped heavy into the pit of your stomach. You shifted the glow to your Bites to blue and slid your knee over to allow a clearer shot to her chest.

Once Matt and Fisk found each other again, you hopped down the stairs and knelt on Dex’s chest. Your other foot pressed on his shoulder as you drew your gun. You pressed the barrel under his chin and he gasped for air beneath you.

Something was wrong. You knew it immediately, before you even got close to Dex. As your weight was bearing down on him, you were tense as you waited for a response. You waited for him to try and throw you off, to pull a knife or a gun of his own. You expected him to toss you around like a rag doll, only for you to come back at him relentlessly. But he did nothing…

“Fight back.” You demanded softly, your voice seemingly gone.

“Y/- Y/N.” He choked out.

The cold seemed to radiate from his chest and stick to the fabric pressed against him. There was regret, likely stemming from whatever injury the impact caused, and sadness. He truly had nothing and he finally understood that, laying on the ground with his former partner pressing a gun to his head.

“Dammit, Poindexter. Fight. Back”. You pressed the gun harder.

“Can’t.” He managed weakly.

You stood slowly, keeping a foot on his wrist and your gun aimed while the other hand hit your mask’s side button. You glanced over his body and saw the complete shatter of his vertebrae.

“You owe whatever pathetic life you have left to Ray… I won't offer this mercy again.” You said simply.

“Stop it, please!” Vanessa shouted desperately.

You turned quickly and saw Matt had Fisk on his knees and was pounding on him. You turned the aim of your gun on Vanessa and moved to stand beside Matt. Despite looking away from the woman, your gun stayed up as you faced Matt and yanked your blade from your shoulder.

His hands were positioned to finish it, to snap Fisk’s neck. You found yourself frozen in place as you waited for what he would do next. Part of you, the part manufactured from the Red Room, wanted to see him do it. You wanted to corrupt the Devil, to bloody his hands in a way he’d never clear.

But the more important part, the part you thought you had lost a long time ago, knew you didn’t want to see him do it. Seeing him do it would make it too real and it would change the way he saw himself and the way you would see him. The things that made him Matt Murdock would break if he did it.

Yet you did nothing. Not until he screamed. A sound of pure rage and agony that was paired with a blast of searing heat. Matt fell to his knees at your feet, reaching for your hand. But before he could take it, Fisk’s words drew your action.

“I will never stop hunting Karen Page or Foggy Nelson.” He warned, though there was defeat in his words.

You moved to stand in front of him and placed the gun against his forehead. He simply glared up at you, covered in his own blood. “I will tell the world who both of you really are.”

“I don’t care about the world.” You spat back, pressing your knee against his chest to knock him into the wall. You leaned your weight down and he coughed as the bony part of your leg dug into his sternum. “It has taken enough from me… You don’t get to do that anymore.”

“Wilson.” Vanessa tried from the other end of the room.

“Vanessa, please go. Please!” He shouted around you.

You turned quickly and fired a shot at Vanessa’s feet, to which she jumped back and screamed. You pressed the now hot barrel back to its prior position as Matt got to his feet.

“You.. You want us to kill you.” Matt realized through heavy breaths. 

“No prison can keep me.” Fisk taunted and you had to grind your teeth. “You know that… Come on, kill me! Isn’t that what you always wanted, Exodus?”

Your trigger finger itched but Matt spoke before you could act.

“No!” Matt yelled in response. You made a face to yourself and knew you should pull the gun back you didn’t, not even when Matt came to your side to yell at Fisk. “God knows I want to, but you don’t get to destroy who I am.”

You almost smiled in relief, but the thump of worry lived in the back of your mind. You could feel Vanessa’s concern for Fisk, her worry that he would die in front of her. Her helplessness plagued you like a magnet to metal and for a moment, you remembered when you felt the same way.

When Luke dragged you to the elevator without Matt. When Fisk said Matt’s name in front of other agents.

“You will go back to prison and you will live the rest of your miserable life in a cage, knowing you’ll never have Vanessa. That this city rejected you, it beat you. We beat you!” Matt demanded and you were proud he found a way back to himself.

“You will keep our secrets.” You spoke simply, putting your gun away to yank the man to the ground. You flicked one of your shock discs at him and pressed a foot against his broad chest. You leaned into your foot and twisted to ensure the small circle engaged and he groaned loudly as you heard the electricity crackle while you leaned the entirety of your weight against him. Matt knelt beside you and lifted his mask before he spoke.

“And you won’t harm Karen Page or Foggy Nelson or anyone else.”

“If you try it, I will go after your wife. And I will prove that she ordered the murder of Agent Rahul Nadeem. And if she’s lucky, she’ll spend the rest of her life in a cell, same as her miserable excuse of a husband.”

You stepped off his chest and tapped Matt’s arm before taking a few steps away. Matt replaced his mask and came to your side as Vanessa inched closer, her uncertainty coming off in shaky waves.

“Thank you.” She said shakily, reaching for your hand.

“I didn’t do it for either of you.” You said sharply. “And I will not extend this mercy again, to any of you.”

She nodded quietly before moving away, leaving you to stand beside an unsteady Matt. His hands were on his head and he was radiating anger. He was mad at himself for not being able to go through with it, but he was also glad that he didn’t. He understood what the consequences would’ve been and he knew that keeping that part of himself was more important than revenge.

“You’re okay.” You said gently to your partner, a hand landing on his shoulder. “I knew you’d do the right thing.”

“What if I didn’t?” He said weakly.

“We’re still in it together, Devil.” You shrugged. “Anyone comes after you, they come after me.”

“If I agree to your demands, you leave my wife alone.” Fisk countered, now kneeling beside Vanessa.

“You misunderstood me.” You warned. “There is no agreement. You have no leverage.”

“You leave Vanessa free!”

“You didn’t care about taking a father from a ten year old boy!” You shouted angrily, the sound of the bullet firing on Ray replaying in your head. Your anger burned down your spine and across your skin until it swelled in your palms, searing through the wound on your shoulder. “You took a husband away from his wife! Why should yours be free?”

“I was protecting the man I love.” Vanessa countered with false confidence, despite the darting eyes and trembling hands. “Could you tell me you don’t do the same?” She nodded to Matt though her eyes remained on you.

“I owe you people nothing. If it were up to me, you’d both be a puddle of your own blood right now.” You spat. “But I promised Ray I would do this the right way, and I promised the Devil I’d let him decide.”

Matt stepped forward and held a hand out to Fisk.

“If you keep your word.” He said simply.

Reluctantly, Fisk shook Matt’s hand. 

“Then it’s a deal.” He spoke bitterly, moments before the heavy banging came from the door.

“We should go.” You grabbed Matt’s arm lightly.

He nodded quietly before taking your hand. You two hurried up the stairs to the upper level and paused to see Brett enter with his team. You watched as they unmasked Dex and you weren’t fully listening to the words they were saying. You were distracted by the pained look on Dex’s face, what looked like tears in his eyes.

“Я оплакываю своего друга, который умер, когда ты надел этот костюм…” You said quietly, more to yourself than anything but you knew Matt heard. “Человек, которого я вижу сейчас, ничто.” (I mourn my friend, who died when you put on that suit… The man I see now is nothing.)

Matt grabbed your hand without a word and led you out the same way you two came in, avoiding cops until you made it to the rooftop. Through your lenses, you saw Fisk being shoved into the car and Foggy and Karen out in the courtyard.

You let out a small chuckle of relief when you could finally accept that you had won.

You, with Matt and Ray’s help, beat Wilson Fisk.

Again.

[petertingle-yipyip]

WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE

eight - beautiful liar

tags: n/a // seven // nine // masterlist

Pairing: billy x reader, frank x reader

Word Count: 6,938

Summary: A breaking point, new alliances, and seeds of mutual trust show Y/N who is and who isn’t on her side.

You and Billy took Morty away after that. It was a quiet car ride for the most part. Morty hardly said anything and Billy kept his focus on the road. He had one hand on the steering wheel, the other resting on your leg and absently tapping to the music on the radio.

You were busy with the swirls dancing between your fingers. The familiar hazy red heat of anger, the chilling wispy blues of sadness, the shaky yellow mist of fear. They weaved between your digits and swirled at your palm, blending out across your skin before reforming into separate entities. They moved like snakes over your knuckles and traced the lines of your palm.

There was something oddly comforting in watching your power in your hand. It was a reminder that you weren’t numb to the world like you so often wanted or claimed. You were human, with human feelings. And you were allowed to have those, to acknowledge them and live with them.

Matt was the one who insisted.

————————————

You were in the library, the folder with the case study open at one end of the small table and your notebook on the other end with a collection of highlighters and colored pens filling the gaps. You were working on an assignment that wasn’t due for at least two more weeks, but you needed something to keep your hands and mind busy. As you were walking to the student center earlier that day, you saw two girls - girls you didn’t even know - who looked just like Nat and Yelena.

Your heart sank and a hefty lump settled in your throat. Ever since then, you’d been jittery. Shaky hands, panicked glances in every corner. There was no way they were there. But your mind kept coming back to the ‘what if’ of it all.

“Foggy said you’d be here.” Matt said, tapping his cane against your foot. His sudden appearance made you jump and knock your notebook over. “Sorry.” He smiled nervously.

“It’s not you.” You sighed and collected your notebook. You condensed your materials and took his hand to guide him to the open chair on the other side. “Just a weird day, I guess… Sometimes I wanna shut it all down and just exist in a bubble for a while.”

“What do you mean?” His brows furrowed with worry behind his glasses.

“I don’t know… I thought a new setting would help but I still feel out of place. It’d be easier if I could just feel nothing.”

And you could. You could block it all out. You didn’t know why you hadn’t done that yet, but the way Matt silently focused in your direction reminded you why. He understood the best in you, despite still being early in your friendship. He seemed to know the truth in you despite the lies you were cloaked in.

“It’s not a bad thing to feel that you’re not happy.” He said after some quiet contemplation. “No one’s happy all the time.”

“Honestly, Matt, I don’t remember the last time I was happy.”

“That’s okay, too… Y/N, feeling those things doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you or you’re never gonna be happy. If you keep people that make you feel better around, pretty soon you won’t remember what this felt like.”

“So I should let myself be sad?”

“Why not?” He shrugged. “Otherwise you’ll never know how to get through it.”

—————————————

You were pulled from your memory when you felt the car stop. You closed your fist quickly and the colors poofed away. Though you knew no one else could see the hazes you did, it still felt that you needed to hide them. Climbing out the car, you saw Billy had driven you all to a nondescript hotel building. You couldn’t even tell if it was in New York or a neighboring city.

“And what’s the deal with you two, huh?” Morty commented as Billy led him through the building, you at his side. You hadn’t even registered Billy had a loose hold on your hand at first. “You order her off a KGB website or what?”

“Он понимает, что я могу убить его сейчас, и никого в этом месте это не волнует, верно? Это сделало бы вам с Фрэнком одолжение.” You said simply, turning to give Morty a sarcastic expression while Billy chuckled. (He does realize I can kill him and no one in this place would care, right? It’d be doing you and Frank a favor.)

“Funny.” He sneered back.

“We used to work together at Anvil.” You said plainly. “I left for a better opportunity.”

“And William let you in on this?” His brows raised as Billy opened the door. “Sleep your way to the top, right?”

You made a move towards him but Billy stepped in front and put an arm around your waist. You glared up at him for a second until you felt it, that confirmation that he had something going. It was smooth confidence, a sense of being in control. You nodded slightly and let out a deep breath to show that you were fine so he backed away, guiding you into the room.

Morty commented on the wallpaper while Billy sat in the chair near the small dining table. He motioned you over and you went, finding yourself trusting whatever plan he had. Likely because you had no real options, unless you were to try to kill them both.

But you’d lose more than you’d gain.

You put your hand on his shoulder again, resting a knee over his leg and leaning into him slightly while his arm hung lazily at your hips.

Though as you were there, you felt something else, something far away. Hope was the best way to describe it.

It was familiar but not too much so. You knew the person, but they were relatively new to your life. But with it came closure, peace almost. And that source you’d know anywhere.

Frank. Which meant the other was Lieberman. Meaning they had something good, something that could end it all. Something you were missing because you were at Billy’s side.

“You never liked me much, did you, Morty?” He said with a certain amusement in his voice.

“Nope.” Morty answered simply. “You special forces types always pissed me off.”

“Probably why he doesn’t like me either.” You joked lowly and Billy chuckled.

“And you had him drinking off the floor like a dog.” Billy continued and you smiled.

Morty wandered the room making some other comment that you ignored.

“You ready?” He said lowly.

“For what?” You asked in the same low tone.

He gently moved your knee and stood, nodding for you to follow. As you two went into the next room with Morty, you saw the dead body on the bed. A woman in tight leather with her throat slashed. You didn’t need to ask to know that was likely the woman Morty had expected. The sight of the uninvolved woman lying dead on sheets stained with her own blood made your chest uncomfortably tight.

You weren’t able to comment on the body because when you turned back to the men, you saw Morty reaching for his gun. As soon as it was in full view, you kicked out at his hand and the gun clattered to the floor. You heard the sound of the blade at Billy’s wrist moments before the squelch of the knife piercing Morty’s abdomen. One. Two. Three times.

He fell to the floor with a thud while Billy collected the discarded gun and cleaned his blade. You moved around the man and put your foot on Morty’s back, flattening him to the floor. You watched the puddle of blood grow thicker and stepped on the man to get to the phone he was crawling to. You yanked the cable out the back and moved away, leaving the man as a bloodied pile on the floor.

As you were getting to Billy’s side, you felt something new. Despite being miles away, you could feel that spark of hope snuff itself out. It was replaced with anger but not a regular pissed-off type of anger. It burned, even from where you were. While Billy was on the phone, you focused in on it a little more and it was easy to understand that whatever Frank had tried had failed. And that felt like a punch to the gut.

The next day, you tried to call Billy so you could talk about the past day or so. You wanted to find out, as definitively as you could, where his loyalty truly was. Obviously, he had some tendency to side with Rawlins given there was some sort of power dynamic or reciprocal relationship between them. But you wondered if there was enough loyalty to Frank that you could wiggle in and separate Billy from Rawlins completely.

Except he didn’t answer.

You checked in with Dex and he said that there was nothing for you and him yet, but you were more than welcome to keep your eyes and ears open for something that he could bring to your SAC.

So with nothing else to do, you went to Lieberman’s.

You knew there would be an earful from Frank the second you walked in, but you opened your mouth and welcomed the argument almost immediately.

“…image from your scope.” Lieberman told Frank and he was the first to acknowledge your appearance. “Hey, Y/N.”

“Hi.” You nodded. “It’s William Rawlins.” You said, gesturing to the man on the screen that you weren’t looking at.

Instead, you were locked in with Frank.

“Uh, yeah… The third.” Lieberman added awkwardly. He must’ve picked up on the tension because he tried to keep the conversation moving forward. “He’s the director of covert operations at the CIA. Takes a guy like this to pull it all together and make it stick.”

“How’d you know that, huh?” Frank asked bitterly.

Sometimes his monotone made it hard to read but that faint red from him was obvious to you.

“I also know that you went after him yesterday and it didn’t work.” You said simply, working to keep your voice level. “It was a CIA safe house, meaning bulletproof glass. No one told you that?”

“I tried to.” Lieberman said from behind Frank.

“Why were you at Bennett’s place, Y/N?” Frank pressed.

“Rawlins hired the team to watch Bennett. One of the guys on the team called me and asked if I was busy. I went because you didn’t like my original idea so I had to improvise.”

“Improvise. Improvise.” Frank repeated and you found yourself feeling slightly intimidated, though you didn’t show it. “What the hell are you up to, hmm? What if Rawlins has you killed cause you did your own thing?”

“He won’t.” You challenged, knowing that Billy - for the moment, at least - wouldn’t let it happen.

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.”

“How? How do you know any of this?”

“Oh please.” You scoffed. “I’ve been doing this shit my whole life. At some point, it gets predictable.”

“Answer the goddamn question.”

“I did. Rawlins hired a team, I got an offer. What’s not connecting?”

“Who called you?”

“Someone I used to work with at Anvil.”

“Anvil? So Russo knew about the team?”

“Rawlins probably tried him, yeah.” You shrugged, ensuring to diminish those suspicions in him. “I guess he helped set up some of Anvil’s early contracts so he thinks Billy owes him something.”

“Jesus Christ.” Frank muttered. “Alright, well what else do you know? Since you wanna go rogue and do whatever the hell you want behind my back.”

“Hey, I had good intel.” You defended. “No one asked you to go take a shot at a goddamn safe house!”

“Okay!” Lieberman yelled suddenly, standing and pushing his way in between you and Frank.

You hadn’t even realized either of you had moved forward to be nearly toe to toe until Lieberman’s elbow was digging into your chest to push you away. The bony pressure snapped you from that suffocating mania and you saw the red at the edge of your vision fading back to the living heat on your skin.

“Frank, you’re the one who said we could trust her.” Lieberman reasoned. “We need her.. She’s good, y’know. She has your back. You need that out there.”

Frank said nothing, only stared at you.

“Y/N.” Lieberman turned towards you. “I know you’re used to doing things your way, but we really need to work together for this to work. Rawlins knows we’re coming for him, which means we need to be clean from here on out.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” You nodded.

“Okay.” He nodded. “No more going behind anyone’s backs. Everything out in the open.”

“Yeah.” Frank agreed.

“Morty Bennett’s dead.” You said flatly. “My guess is to protect you or to just Rawlins cashing in an I.O.U. because Billy did it.”

“Yeah, I saw the piece the Bulletin ran on that.” Lieberman agreed. “Stabbed to death.”

“Good.” Frank nodded.

“Shit.” Lieberman said suddenly, abandoning his post between you two to return to the computer. “What if- Oh, God. What if he’s been waiting for someone to look for him? By searching his file, I’ve just blown us. There could be a team on its way right now.”

“Relax a second.” You tried but the man’s frazzled state vibrated the air in the compound.

“You’ve been on that CIA site all day, right? You seen anything about us? Any chatter at all?” Frank added in a matter-of-fact tone.

“No..” Lieberman said awkwardly.

“No?” You repeated, now baffled by the panic. “CIA’s not coming after us. FBI doesn’t have anything to do with this either. My partner would’ve let me know if this hit my SAC’s desk. Homeland barely has anything on Kentucky and I’m guessing his appearance on base is being masked as a training exercise.”

“I took a shot at this guy and you didn’t read anything about it.” Frank continued. “You’re scared, David, and I get that. But think about how this Rawlins prick feels. I think the three of us, we’re sitting pretty right now.”

“He’s trusting his inner circle to take care of it.” You reasoned. “Whoever from Cerberus he can still get to and any new allies he’s made, he’s gonna send them our way first before anything legit comes at us.”

Within minutes of that conversation ending, Lieberman was sent into a new spiral of panic. The cameras within his home were no longer accessible so he urged you and Frank to go look into it. You two conceded and Frank stopped off to get flowers for Sarah.

When you two arrived, you expected there to be some sort of argument between you all about that missed dinner, but there was none. It wasn’t even mentioned. You shrugged it off as Frank having already made up for it. Instead, she offered you two a glass of wine and conversation.

You had your pocket tech out and came to find out that there was no damage to cameras or connection. It was just that the internet had been unplugged.

As you focused back on the conversation in front of you, you found a lightness in the air. More so than just friendly. You wondered if Sarah was flirting with Frank, at least a little bit.

You went under the end table and reconnected the internet so that buzzing panic gnawing at the back of your head would go away. In the meantime, Sarah poured you two another glass while talking about David.

“You never talk about your wife.” Sarah told Frank before glancing at you. “And you have been awfully quiet. Husband?”

“No, not anymore.” You gave a sad smile. “He is- Or was truly perfect… The kind of feeling that you’ll never get with anyone else. Other guys are different and you think that’s good, till you miss something specific he used to do. You said David would fill your tank, Matt would sit on the roof of our building with me. We’d just kinda exist, in our own space where almost no one could find us.”

Your fingers slipped under the collar of your shirt and you found the chain with the band.

“I’m so sorry.. Was it recent?” Her eyes softened and she placed a comforting hand over yours.

“It’s been a few months.” You nodded. “He was the type that I’ll be getting over for the rest of my life.”

Frank patted your back gently and you smiled slightly in thanks before he started talking about Maria. You realized that the explosions in your chest were less frequent, the heat in your blood less aggressive. The hole in your chest didn’t echo as deep. You were still angry and alone, but maybe it did get better if you let yourself feel it.

It wouldn’t go away on its own but everyday processes it and accepts it a little bit more.

Maybe you could figure out how to get through it after all.

Sarah tried to convince you two to stay longer but you both politely declined. You stated your FBI case and Frank simply said he had ‘things’ to do. She gave you two a small tupperware, leaning in to kiss Frank only moments after. You spun on your heel and hurried out the room while Frank let her down gently.

You laughed about it once you two were in the car and teased Frank the drive back, only to get a ‘yeah, yeah’ and a chuckle.

The next day, you got a call from Dinah. She asked if she could meet you for drinks somewhere you two could talk and you could feel her pride through the phone. She had something good. You agreed and asked her to meet you at Josie’s after she got out of the office.

Not much happened during the day, so around six she called again. You met her outside the building and she was hesitant to go inside. You, however, walked in with a smile on your face and all the regulars celebrated your arrival.

You ordered a drink for you both and told Josie to start you a tab. She joked that you'd better not have the same paying habits as your friends and you insisted you’d close at the end of the night.

“So, you have something good for me?” You asked with a smirk.

“You were right about the bug.” She said quietly, leaning in to keep secrecy.

“You don’t have to whisper.” You said, mocking her with the same tone - which earned you a scowl - before speaking plainly. “No one here gives a shit. One of the perks of doing business here.”

You remembered when you and your friends sat at one of the tables, talking to Grotto. It was the start of what would turn into a long road with Frank Castle and the Punisher.

“How did you know about it?” Her voice snapped you back.

“Doing business here?” You questioned. “The guys at Nelson and Murdock loved coming here, been doing it since college.”

“I meant the bug.”

“There was feedback.” You gestured vaguely to your head. “You figure out who’s on the other end?”

“No, but I have a plan. I’m setting up a fake meet, day after tomorrow, with Jack DeLeon and use Frank Castle’s name as bait.”

“Two names like that means a big risk. I assume you’ve got a solid team?”

“It’s… Standard.”

“So why’d you call me?”

“I was hoping for your freelance help.”

“Mmm.” You hummed with a new smirk. “I’d thought you’d never ask. You think we’re gonna catch whoever’s after Castle?”

“It’s the best chance we have.” She defended.

“And do what with them?”

“Expose them.” She said as if it was obvious. “Put them on trial.”

“Dinah, these men that were chasing, killed two kids and an innocent woman.” You said plainly, jabbing a finger against the tabletop to punctuate your words. “You’re not chasing one ghost, but two. Castle hears you have the guy responsible, he’s gonna come for him. Just like he came for Schoonover. And Bennett. Kitchen Irish, Mexican Cartel, Dogs of Hell. What makes you any different?”

“Once we expose what happened in Kandahar, Castle can have him.”

“I doubt it gets that far.”

“Do you know something? Is that your point?”

“What if I told you I had a theory as to who was at the top of the whole thing?”

“I’d say you’re full of shit.”

“Am I?” You laughed slightly. “Billy usually doesn’t think so.”

Her eyes were suddenly taken over by the green haze of jealousy.

“Don’t forget that he’s not all yours, Dinah.” You taunted.

“I never said he was.” She countered tightly while the haze faded.

“Right… When was the last time he woke up in your bed, then?”

“That’s… not relevant.”

“So this morning then.” You nodded. “Explains why he didn’t call me back last night.”

“What do you know, Y/N?” She said firmly. “Besides how to get on my nerves within twenty minutes.”

“I met this guy recently, CIA head of covert ops. Now he looks like every other run of the mill CIA department head, but the eye… Frank told me how he went in on Orange and his guys had to pull him off. This guy’s eye matches Frank’s story.”

“Who was it?”

“That’s the kicker. Rumor is this guy has old money. I’m talking his family’s been in everything throughout the generations. We can’t go after him without a direct line and solid confirmation.”

“Give me the name, Y/N.”

“Don’t know it.” You shrugged. “All I know is that he’s ’the third’. And I’m in on the sting, by the way. You have a tactical for me?”

She handed you a folder.

“We’ve uploaded a fake one to our servers.” She explained as you looked over the pages.

“Yeah, the bug in your office is probably in your computers too. Let me ask you this… You coming to me right now, is that for me as a federal agent or me as a ghost story? Because those have two completely different operating guidelines.”

“I need results.” She said firmly, though it seemed more to convince herself than you. “But I also believe in the law so… What’s the difference?”

“Blood. And equipment. The ghost story has better toys.”

“Just-“ She groaned. “The federal agent. I need these men alive, okay? One of them gotta talk.”

“Right…” You nodded. “You hear about Morty Bennett?”

“No?”

“Stabbed to death in a motel upstate.” You said. “After an alleged training exercise, but he also was in on the drugs in the KIAs.”

“You think your CIA guy had him killed?”

“It tracks… He had Henderson killed. He wants Castle killed. He has Bennett killed after Frank shows up.”

“It’s scary how fast you can connect dots.” She said with mild awe. “Maybe you were made for the FBI.”

“That is not what I was made for.” You looked to her, holding out your glass for a toast.

“What is it then?” She raised hers.

“You’ll see soon enough.”

You two didn’t talk for much longer. You paid your tab on the way out as promised before returning to Lieberman’s. You had to pause when you walked in to process to seemingly off the wall conversation they were having.

“Do you. Miss sex?” Lieberman said with a drunken slur, to which Frank laughed.

“What do you want me to say?” He said with a shrug and a smile.

Frank noticed you and gestured you over. You dropped on the seat beside him and he passed you the bottle. You glanced at the label before shrugging and taking a drink.

“Because for me, I miss sex.” Lieberman ranted and you made a face to yourself. “You wanna hear something funny?”

“What’s that?” Frank said.

“I’m hung like a moose.” He answered proudly.

“Ты, должно быть, шутишь.” You laughed and passed the bottle back to Frank. (You’ve got to be kidding.)

“Y/N!” Lieberman announced happily. “You miss sex?”

“No.” You shook your head.

“No?” His brows furrowed and he dramatically cocked his head. “A woman like you doesn’t miss sex?”

“Why would I miss it?”

“Wait, do you two…” He trailed off and gestured to you and Frank. You stared expectantly with raised brows while Frank cocked his head in question. “You two hook up?”

“Отвратительно!” You said and laughed. “He’s not exactly my type.” (Gross!)

“Not your type? He’s exactly your type!” Lieberman reasoned.

“No, he’s not.”

“Yeah… Angry, check. Murderous, check. Ruggedly handsome, check.” Lieberman threw his arms widely to the side. “What else do ya need, Y/N?”

“Sounds more like he’s your type.” You joked. “Besides, my last guy was more of an altar boy. Nowadays I tend to go for a man who’s a little more unstable.”

“Oh, what did- What do you guys call him?” He looked over his shoulder while he thought before spinning back to face you two. “Red! Red wasn’t any good then?”

“Red was plenty good.” You defended with a laugh. “But my sex life didn’t die with him.”

“Jesus Christ.” Frank muttered and made a face before drinking from the bottle.

“I can make it worse.” You laughed and shifted to face him.

“Please don’t.”

“Yeah, I usually call Bi-“ You began before Frank leaned forward and pushed you gently by your forehead, making you laugh. You looked over and saw Lieberman drop his pants so you laughed again before covering your eyes.

You dropped your head to Frank’s shoulder as a means to hide while Lieberman made jokes about Frank being an ass man, to which you were still laughing.

You hadn’t realized before, but you had almost forgotten what your honest laugh sounded like.

“It’s good to hear you laugh like that, Princess.” Frank said honestly when Lieberman took a few steps away. “Didn’t think I would till this was all over.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry I’ve been so horrible lately.” You admitted as you straightened. “I don’t know how to feel this or even what I should feel. I’m pretty lost right now.”

Before Frank could offer any other consolation, Lieberman staggered back in. 

“Madani is how we fix this! She wants the same things we do. We don’t need to hide from her. We give it to her and she arrests Rawlins. I go home, boom!” Lieberman ranted quickly and you instantly felt the light air of drunken jokes fall heavy.

“No.” You said flatly while Frank firmly said “Stop that shit.”

“Rawlins dies.” You continued. “You said it yourself, he has hands in everything. That kind of reach can surpass prison.”

“That’s right.” Lieberman said sarcastically. “Everybody dies with you two. Your family’s dead.” He pointed to Frank. “Your husband’s dead.” He pointed to you.

Why did everyone call Matt your husband?

“Anyone that ever look at you sideways, they’re dead.” He continued. “And you just keep on going. You two are psychopaths.”

“I let Wilson Fisk live that night and I’ve regretted it every since. If you want to see this thing to the end, I highly suggest you stop while you have your head..”

You stood quickly with tight fists but Frank reached out for your wrist. Lieberman stormed away in a huff and you felt your nails digging into your palm as your fist got impossibly tighter. Lieberman said something about calling Madani so you pulled yourself free and moved across the room.

You knocked the phone out of his hand and he took a swing at you. You ducked quickly and sidestepped before slamming an elbow against the pressure point of his chest. He wobbled into Frank, who knocked him unconscious.

“Madani has a plan she brought to me.” You said as Frank set up Lieberman on the cot. “She wants to go after Rawlins, but she doesn’t know it’s Rawlins.”

“How’s she gonna do that?” Frank asked, seemingly uninterested.

“Fake sting.” You explained. “She put out a tact plan that says you’re meeting with DeLeon, hopes it’ll draw out his team and she can get info.”

“You gonna do it?”

“Yeah, might as well.”

“Why?”

To find out what side Billy’s on.

“Keep tabs.” You said instead. “There’s rumors stirring that I don’t like.”

“Anything I should know?”

“Nothing you’d believe.” You said honestly.

“So, what, you’re just gonna stroll up with your goggles and little buzzers like nothing?”

At that you laughed.

“No, just me. No mask, no suit, no Bites. Just me and a bulletproof and a pistol.”

“Alright.” Frank nodded. “Don’t get killed, okay?”

“Haven’t failed you yet, right? I’ll be back in one piece.”

You went home to find your door cracked open. You instinctively reached for the gun at your hip but you came up empty. Instead, you checked under your cuff and found the blade. With a silent curse, you crept forward with a sudden feeling of being unwelcome in your own apartment. You went to release the blade but used the other hand to slow it to reduce the sound. The tip threatened to break the skin of your palm as you guided it out.

As you moved into your apartment, you saw a vaguely familiar shape kneeling at the closet under the stairs that led to the roof. You started a little harder and saw the familiar trail of long blonde hair.

“Dammit, Karen.” You said loudly, to which she jumped. “Why are you in my apartment?”

“Sorry, I just…” She said quickly as she pushed the case back and carefully shut the doors. “Still doesn’t feel real is all.”

You sighed slightly and gestured for her to sit while you went back to shut your door. You sat beside her on the couch and removed the blade from around your wrist. You tossed it into the coffee table with a loud clank before you stared at the empty bed that was almost   mocking you from your bedroom.

“Some days I wake up and I still think he’ll be next to me.” You said absently. “And then I realize he’s not and it feels like a knife in my chest.”

“Y/N..” She said gently and her hand came to your arm, snapping you from that heavy melancholy.

“I’m sure you’ve heard but we’re getting closer.” You said instead, pushing to your feet to get space as the tears began to burn your eyes. “We’ve got a name and a face. Just need an opening.”

“Oh.. That’s good, right? The sooner all this is done the better.” She tried and you scoffed.

“Karen, nothing about any of this will get better. Frank’s not gonna come out as an upstanding citizen once this guy is gone. Matt isn’t gonna come back. Nelson and Murdock won’t come back.”

“I didn’t mean-“

“We won’t come back either.”

“I don’t understand…”

“You and I.” You shrugged slightly. “After I told you about Exodus but before Grotto came to us, we were becoming pretty decent friends.”

“I’m still your friend, Y/N. Foggy is still your friend.” She said with gentle insistence as she stood to face you. “I know that nothing’s going to be the same. I’m not that naive, but you have to believe that you won’t be miserable forever.”

Maybe that’s what you were made for. Misery.

“Can you just…” You gestured to your door. “With Frank and Billy and Dinah and Lieberman and Sarah and Orange, worrying about you and Foggy is the last thing I need right now.”

She scoffed lightly before muttering to herself as she headed to the door. She was nearly out when you heard her footsteps coming back. You had to bite your tongue to keep your sharp comment back as you glared at her, waiting for her words.

“You know.” She said angrily, a slight snarl as she clicked her tongue. “You can’t sit here and blame Matt’s death for the shitty way you treat people that care about you.”

“Right. Thanks.” You nodded, slamming your shoulder against hers as you moved past her. You nearly slammed the bedroom door behind you.

The next morning you had a call from Billy, saying he wanted to pick you up for lunch to talk about a new project. You also had a text from an unknown number saying to be outside and you knew it had to be Frank or Lieberman. You got dressed quickly and grabbed a jacket before heading down, getting out just as  the car pulled up. Without much explanation, Frank drove to Sarah’s house.

You two stepped inside and the atmosphere of the house was noticeably thicker than the last time. The mention of her son sent panic through the air and it made you shiver. You turned your head up the stairs, feeling a young anger burning under the thick blanket of loneliness. A few feet away sat a vibrating bundle of mixed emotions. Sadness, stress, exhaustion.

“Is Leo upstairs too?” You asked simply.

“Yeah… Both the kids are.” Sarah nodded.

“Why don’t you take a walk while we talk to them, yeah?” You offered, adding a small smile while you took in some of her worry. “Pete’ll talk to Zach and I’ll chat with Leo.”

She sniffled before nodding. She led you upstairs to Leo’s room before she stopped at Zach’s and asked him to head down. Zach stopped and stared at you in silence for a second before glancing to either hip, likely looking for your gun.

“Can I hold the gun now?” He said and you frowned.

“Only got my badge today.” You shrugged and shifted your jacket to show the badge. “And you’re still not old enough, bud.”

You tapped on Leo’s door and she called for you to come in. She smiled widely at you and adjusted on her bed so you could sit beside her. You put hands in your pockets as you sat and found the small enamel emblem waiting for you. You pulled it out and were greeted with the vibrant red hourglass of the Red Room.

You realized you hadn’t worn that jacket since you and Matt revealed your identities to each other in the office.

“What that?” Leo asked, leaning over to see.

“This is a very complicated little symbol.” You said honestly. “Y’know, I was a very different person growing up. A lot angrier, lonelier, more hurt. And this-“ You lifted the shape for you both to see. “-is a symbol of the place that caused it all.”

“Was it a school?”

“Sort of, like a boarding school and an orphanage put together.” You offered her the emblem. “I learned a lot in that place, about myself and different skills. It made me who I am, or who I thought I had to be at least.”

You glanced over and saw she was fascinated with the little piece of enamel.

“You can keep it if you’d like.” You laughed slightly. “I may not love it but it does show that the things we go through don’t define us… You don’t have to be the one who holds everything together.”

“Did my mom ask you to say that?” She dropped her hands to her lap.

“No.” You shrugged. “Just thought you’d need to hear it.”

“One of us has to have their head on straight. If it’s not gonna be Zach, then it’s me.” She nodded, as if trying to convince herself more than you.

“Right, right. Did you ever hear about Daredevil and Exodus?”

“Yeah?”

“It was like that with them, too. Daredevil thought Exodus was crazy for wanting things her way. She wanted to hurt the people that did what was done to her. Yeah, she wasn’t hurting the people that hurt her, but if they did the same things to others, it was the same.”

“But it’s not.”

“Right, that’s what Daredevil said. He agreed that bad people needed to face consequences but right consequences. Arrests and charges and trials. They argued for a long time in the beginning.”

“So who gave in?”

“You ever hear about Daredevil killing anyone?” You raised your brows and she shook her head. “Me neither. Exodus pulled back, trusted Daredevil and Daredevil stopped trying so hard to control everything she did.”

“How do you know this?”

You leaned forward and back, looking around as if to make sure no one else was around, then you motioned her closer. She leaned in as did you, lifting a hand to cover your mouth.

“Because I’m Exodus.” You whispered and her mouth dropped. “Or I was, at least, before I got the FBI spot.”

“Ohmygod!” She whispered loudly. “Does Pete know?”

“Nah.” You shook your head.

“Wait. But you’re so nice?”

“It took a lot of violence to be so gentle.” You nodded. “And I’m not always like this… Growing up I was tired of being afraid, so I became something others would fear.”

“I’m not afraid of you.”

“Really?”

“Really.” She nodded. “I like you’re kinda cool.”

“Well in that case, I want you to keep that with you, okay?” You gestured to the hourglass. “It’s more than a symbol. So long as you have it, you'll know I have your back.”

“Thanks.” She smiled. “Could you…”

Your brows raised in question.

“Could you teach me some stuff?”

“Like fighting?”

“Yeah…”

“I'm not gonna teach you anything crazy.” You laughed. “But I can show you how to get out of stuff. C’mon.”

You offered her your hand and she took it excitedly, shoving the Red Room logo into her pocket. You two went downstairs and found Frank getting ready to take Zach outside. The guys began throwing a football in the street while you showed Leo how to break a few basic grapples and some common reversals.

You had just sat down after your shower when Billy called. You groaned as you pushed yourself to your feet and headed out again. As little as you wanted to be in your apartment, you wanted at least a few minutes to sit down. Regardless, you met Billy out front.

He was waiting outside the car and opened the door for you. You said nothing as you sat in the passenger seat and he said nothing when he drove you to some out of the way part of the waterfront.

“This isn’t lunch.” You said simply.

He gave a small chuckle in return before he got out. You muttered to yourself about what you had gotten yourself into while you shoved the door open. You slammed it behind yourself and took a few short steps to catch up to Billy. He looked over his shoulder and offered you a smirk that you furrowed your brows at.

What the hell was he up to?

After a few minutes of silence, you two standing tensely on opposite sides of the room, a small group of men entered. You stood taller almost instantly, one hand tightening into a fist while the other snuck behind your back for the blade at your belt.

But the men walked right past you.

They didn’t even acknowledge your presence in the far corner. They were completely focused on Billy, but you weren’t so sure that would be a good thing. Your body relaxed only a fraction of a percent when their conversation started. It took them out of the room and Billy’s eyes met yours, silently asking if you were going to follow.

Hesitantly, you did.

You placed yourself in the doorway Billy was previously waiting in and listening quietly. Both arms were crossed over your chest, hiding balled up fists as the men talked. You didn’t care all that much to listen, knowing whatever Billy was going to offer would be met with refusal.

You couldn’t play both sides forever. When you tried to do that with Fisk and Matt, it got complicated. It got messy. People got hurt that didn’t need to and it wasn’t like you had a ton of spare people as of late.

“So who’s the girl?” One of the men finally acknowledged you.

“Bystander.” You said flatly with a small shrug.

“A bystander that doesn’t flinch at open fire on civilians?” Another challenged. “I don’t buy it.”

“Good thing you don’t have to.” You hissed before pushing yourself up and looking to Billy. “Thanks for the invite, but I’m not interested. Have fun though.”

You offered a salute before turning in your heels and leaving. You left without responding to any of the comments in your wake, both from Billy and his friends. You contemplated waiting at his car but that defeated the whole point of your exit so you opted to walk. You didn’t get far before Billy was calling you back.

When you didn’t stop or turn around, you heard his rushed footsteps to catch you.

“So that’s it, huh?” He asked when he finally got to your side.

“Yeah, I’m not interested in being an errand boy for Rawlins. Been there, done that. No thanks.” You answered simply, keeping your eyes forward and your feet moving.

“C’mon, Y/N.” He groaned. “You really think-“

“Just stop.” You cut in firmly. “I’m not doing anything for Rawlins anymore. I need to focus on my own shit, not trying to take down Frank.”

“He’s not gonna let you just walk away.”

“Well then I hope you’ll give me a heads up when I become your next blacked out search and destroy op.”

[petertingle-yipyip]

WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE

seven - so it goes…

tags: n/a // six // eight // masterlist

Pairing: Frank x Reader, Billy x Reader

Word Count: 8,917

Summary: All eyes on her, a skilled illusionist. Playing the field for information gets what she needed but could threaten the relationship keeping her afloat.

You stayed late to help Curtis clean up after group. Lewis has pushed past you on your way in and ignored any sort of conversation you had offered. You could feel he was still angry, about something that was bigger than what had happened at Anvil though he clearly hadn’t forgiven you for that either. You shrugged it off initially, but it struck you as something interesting when you noticed O’Connor didn’t show up. That was a man that loved to attend group for the chance of pissing someone off, so for him to miss a session and to see Lewis - who was beginning to idolize the man - holding in more anger than necessary, it all had you wondering what you had missed while you were off tending to your wounded.

You tried to use that time alone to talk to Curtis about Lewis and O’Connor to find out what happened but before much could come from that conversation, Billy came in. You listened in on what he came to say but focused more on the task of putting things away when something caught your attention and you nearly dropped the chairs in your hands.

“You know, Frank Castle.” He continued and you stepped around Curtis and glared at the man. Billy gave you no reaction and just kept talking. “Our friend, our dead friend. You seen him recently?”

“Billy.” You hissed and lightly smacked his arm.

“No, its.. It’s alright, Y/N.” Curtis held a hand out to you and you turned to face him. He knew Billy was baiting him into some sort of a confession, though neither of you could’ve been sure if Billy had any sureness in his attempt. So Curtis remained calm, albeit confused, and you remained irritated. “What do you mean, man? Have I been back to the cemetery? Or am I seeing ghosts, having flashbacks? What are we talking about here?”

There was a staredown between the two men that seemed to span an eternity. Tension rose with every second until you subtly snapped your fingers at your side and it broke instantly. Billy looked away first but you felt the relief from Curtis as a shive across your own skin. 

“Frank’s alive, man.” Billy finally confessed and you lifted your head slightly in confusion. Clearly, Billy had a plan, but to hell if you knew what it was. “Sorry, I had to find out if you knew.”

“And why do you think that?” Curtis countered calmly but he was rightfully suspicious of his friend’s accusation.

“I can’t tell you how I found out, but I found out, and now I gotta find him.”

“I’ll tell you.” You cut in simply, speaking quickly before Billy could try to stop you. “Homeland Security, some agent is looking into an incident that Cereberus was allegedly involved in in the middle east. She said where but I don’t remember. She swears Frank is alive and hurt and gonna get himself killed on his little crusade… I’m not so sure.” You ended with a shrug when you saw the glare Billy was shooting you. You simply brushed him off and the heat from his look disappeared almost immediately.

“I was hoping you had been lying to me this whole time.” Billy continued, taking a subtle step closer in an attempt to gain control of the conversation. The attempted power move almost made you laugh. “At least then I’d have a lead on where to start. I’ve been putting out the old unit call on the radio.”

“Which I thought was risky as a first move.” You shot Billy a look that he ignored. “But hey, what do I know?”

“Has he answered?” Curtis asked and though his tone was level, there was concern laced in his words. You wanted to reassure him that Frank was fine, walking and talking and eating and arguing with you the same as he was before the arrow, but you couldn’t do that with wannabe Detective Russo in the same room.

Billy shook his head slightly and Curtis gave a shrug as if to say that was enough of an answer.

“If you could just give me an idea on where to start…” Billy tried and you had to look down to keep your eye roll to yourself.

Desperation was not a good look for Billy Russo.

“So what? You’re gonna help them?” Curtis asked with a slight challenge that almost went unnoticed.

“Imma help Frank.” He corrected and your ears perked up. Curtis noticed your focus shift over Billy’s shoulder and your eye contact only lasted less than a second. “I could get him out of here, man. Free and clear.”

“You do realize his lawyer and a federal agent is still in the room with you, right?” You pointed out with a sigh. “You need to tell me what you’re planning, Billy, now.”

“Now is my chance to make things right, Y/N.” Billy said instead of a real answer.

“That’s not an answer.”

“You lived how many lives before you decided to keep this one?” He spat over his shoulder before instantly regretting the words.

You closed the distance between you two and stood in front of him in silence for a few moments. You watched his eyes dart between yours and across your face to try and read your expression, but you knew you were blank. You gave him nothing. You owed him nothing. No explanation, no answer. When he opened his mouth to speak, you didn’t hesitate to bring an open palm across his cheek. The firm slap echoed throughout the empty room and the impact mimicked that familiar explosion.

“Не говори о годах, о которых ты ничего не знаешь, или я вырежу тебе язык и засуну его тебе в горло.” You warned lowly before storming out of the room. (Do not speak of years you know nothing about or I’ll cut out your tongue and shove it down your throat.)

You sat in your car for a few minutes in quiet anger. You had the AC running full blast and the doors locked while the car idled in the parking lot. You usually didn’t care when people had a snide comment on your past given the fact that they usually knew nothing and spoke from a place of ignorance. But it was the tone that Billy used, the entitlement he believed he had for you to look the other way. Just because you slept with Billy from time to time didn’t mean that you owed him any sort of favors, especially where your new job was concerned. If you so much as breathed in a sketchy direction, Hattley would have your badge faster than you could say ‘No’. Being on Frank’s side to begin with was risky enough, but for Billy to assume that you would side with him over your own wellbeing was selfish and juvenile.

You were quick to return to the compound when you noticed Billy and Curtis leaving the building. You kept the air on during the drive so by the time you got there, your skin felt a normal temperature despite the newest heat that had made a home in your heart and spread through your veins with every beat. You arrived not long before Curtis did. You felt his anger before you saw him, a dull heat that wasn’t necessarily directed at anyone specific but more at the entirety of the situation.

“I lied for you again.” Curtis said flatly, just as you had hopped up to sit at the edge of the counter.

“You did the right thing, Curt.” Frank answered and you nodded in agreement, just as the unit call came through the radio again.

“I’m going to break that damn thing if I have to hear it one more time.” You muttered as you looked around for something to throw.

“Every hour, on the hour.” Lieberman commented indifferently. He had said his peace when it started so he felt no need to argue anymore. “This guy’s determined.”

“He said he wanted to help you, that he could help you.” Curtis explained and you pressed your lips together in an effort to keep your thoughts in your head. “Whatever he’s offering, if you ask me, you should take it.”

You shook your head slightly and hopped off the counter to pace the small kitchen area. You rubbed a hand over your mouth while you tried to flesh out your thoughts, create a pinboard of ideas in your head and connect them with imaginary strings. You knew your expressions were shifting with your thoughts, brows furrowing and lifting while your eyes squinted or went wide when your head nodded or shook as things did or didn’t make sense. You glanced up to ensure your path was still clear and you noticed Frank was watching you with a questioning expression. You shook him off, hoping he would understand the gesture was meant as a ‘not now’ before he answered an expectant Curtis.

“Less people know I’m alive, safer it is for them.” Frank finally said.

“But what about you? You don’t look too safe. You look like a guy that nearly got his ass killed and you know it.” Curtis pressed. “And for what, huh?”

“The thing with Gunner was an ambush.” You explained quickly with the intent of scraping away some of Curtis’ frustration. “Not so much the arrow but the bullet wound… Someone knew where we were going. What I don’t get is who knew or how they knew because Gunner was off-grid for years. Someone put him on someone else’s radar but…”

You trailed off your question when the answer was so obvious it could’ve slapped you. It practically did. Dinah Madani must’ve been looking into the Cerberus crew, directly or indirectly, but that must’ve alerted a certain someone in Langley and Gunner was either the nearest or the most logical target to take out first. It was either Dinah’s research that popped up on someone’s radar or there was a bug in her office.

“If I could just add something here…” Lieberman tried.

“You don’t get an opinion, not in this conversation.” Curtis said without breaking eye contact with Frank. “Right now, she’s lucky she gets one.”

“I’m still his lawyer.” You defended quickly. “Taking anything from Billy should be carefully weighed out before anyone jumps on it… There’s still the potential for foul play.”

“You think it could be a set-up?” Curtis scoffed. “C’mon, Y/N/N. You were there when he was telling me everything.”

“And the person who told him is someone he’s sleeping with, which is the one looking into him.” You outed Billy with an indifferent shrug. “There’s still the potential of using Frank as an excuse to bed her a few more times. Y’know, gratitude sex.”

Curtis laughed in disbelief before turning back to Frank. You ground your teeth slightly and restrained both your hands and your tongue. Going up against Billy was one thing but standing opposite of him and Curtis would make your life harder than it already is.

“So what? I keep lying for you?” Curtis challenged.

“Look. Curt, you… You gotta do what you think is right. I’d never ask you to do anything else.” Frank said honestly and it proved something you had already knew.

Despite the reputation, despite the pain and trauma he had fought through, Frank Castle a good man who cared about people. A select few people, but those people would always be the safest in New York.

Curtis left after that without saying anything else. Frank and Lieberman talked shortly about Billy and Lieberman said Frank should. At that, Frank turned to you.

“You’ve been quiet.” He said and your eyebrows went up.

“I don’t think you’ll like what I have to say.” You said honesty.

“C’mon, Princess. It’s never stopped you before.”

“Like I said, Billy’s sleeping with Madani so this may be all for her… But there’s been other coincidences that I don’t trust.”

“Like what?”

“Like ones I can’t prove yet.”

“Anything that’d hold in court?”

“No.” You laughed slightly. “Everything is just circumstantial at best. I’m trying to get the proof but he’s careful. He covers his tracks, watches what he says.”

“But do you think-”

“No, okay?” You cut in sharply. “I don’t. I don’t think you should talk to him. I don’t think you should take anything he offers if you talk to him. Billy Russo has gotten too close. He needs to be taken off the board.”

“Off the board… How do you plan to do that then?”

“I’m not gonna kill him.” Yet. “He just needs to believe Dinah is wrong about you being alive. Maybe whatever she thought would’ve killed you actually did because something isn’t right about everything.”

“Go ahead then.” Frank gestured for you to keep going. “Lay it all out, Princess.”

“No, you wouldn’t believe me and I don’t even blame you.” You put your hands up in defeat as you turned away from him. “Do whatever you want, Frank, but don’t expect me to go along with it.”

Just hours later, both men tried to invite you to the waterfront. You ignored Billy’s call completely but listened to the voicemail almost immediately after it was left. Admittedly, you were surprised Billy had called given your last interaction was a solid slap and a threat. And your last interaction with Frank was you throwing accusations at Billy with no proof. So either man reaching out came slightly out of left field.

But you did what you had to do and you chose yourself, the way you were always meant to. You wanted to return to being alone, the way you had been so long to the point where you liked it. Where you longed for it. Then Matt and Foggy pulled you out of it, Marc and Steven kept you out of it. But to live a life without them, without any of them, you began to hide in that loneliness despite that yearning for someone to hold your hand and drag you out.

Meanwhile, Frank and Billy were sitting on the waterfront. At first, they spent a few minutes catching up but talking about Anvil led to Billy’s offer. And while Frank was listening to it, he was also watching for Y/N.

He didn’t think she’d show given the fact that she didn’t answer his call, but he still had hope. It wasn’t a decision he would take lightly, and Y/N doesn’t stand so firmly for nothing. She knew something, something she didn’t think he would believe without seeing. But if she was there, she probably could’ve used that fancy law degree and gotten Billy to admit to it. Or at least trip him up enough to prove something wasn’t right.

“You uh, you know Y/N, right?” Frank asked, looking back to his friend who he could’ve sworn was blushing at her name.

“Yeah, yeah I know her.” Billy smiled slightly. “Hell of a lady.”

“Yeah..” Frank smiled. “She really went to bat for me way back when. You tell her about this?”

“Started to.” He shrugged. “Then I said something stupid and she walked out. Slapped the shit outta me, too.”

“Eh, you probably deserved it.” Frank chuckled, but the comment sparked a question. Y/N wasn’t one to lose composure over nothing, so what did Billy say to her? “Was all this, the new life and everything… Any of this her idea?”

“I don’t think she wants to know for sure if you’re alive.” Billy answered. “She took your death pretty hard, man. Then she loses her boyfriend and… I don’t know, all that death changes you.”

“Yeah…” Frank nodded slightly.

He had noticed Y/N had been colder lately, more to the point, but knowing that even Billy noticed it meant she must’ve really lost it after Murdock. He knew she was still hurting, feeling guilty every second she was alive, but he also knew she was the strongest person he knew. She’d fight her way through this just like she fought through all the other shit in her life, but he couldn’t help but wonder what would change in the process.

“You spend a lot of time with her?” Frank asked, trying to lighten the mood between them where Y/N was concerned.

“Fair amount, yeah.” He nodded with a proud smile.

“You actually like her, don’t you? Aw shit, is Billy Russo actually interested in settling down?”

At that, Billy laughed. “She’d kick my ass to Jersey if I tried.”

You were headed out the next morning with the intent - again - of going to Dinah’s office. You had to get a lead for your leak theory, whether it be Billy Russo or Dinah Madani. Either way, you had no issues going after either. Despite your FBI position lurking in the back of your thoughts, which you were on standby for until something good came across someone’s desk, nothing would stop you.

You took advantage of the badge at your hip and flashed it at the confused looks. The familiar look of the badge was enough for them to nod and accept your presence but someone decided to step in front of you. He gently grabbed your arm, pulled you down a secluded hall, and stepped close enough to back you against the wall.

“What are you doing here?” He asked lowly and you met his expression with one of challenge.

“Visiting your girlfriend.” You mocked quickly. “You?”

“She’s not my-“

“I don’t care.” You cut in with a sigh. “Can I go now?”

“You didn’t answer my call yesterday.”

“Yeah, I figured the slap was enough. Besides, I was too busy with your girlfriend’s head between my legs.” You lied and his brows raised. “Jealous?”

“Yeah, actually.” The corner of his mouth tilted to a smile but dropped quickly at your glare.

“Gross.”

“I’m kidding, c’mon.” He chuckled nervously.

“Get out of my way.” You mumbled and nodded for him to move.

“No, Y/N, just-“

“No.” You said sharply and moved forward to force him a few steps back. “I don’t care, Billy. I don’t care what you do with Dinah. I don’t care what you do with Frank. What I do care about is my name and my reputation. Neither of you get to take those from me.”

“I’m not trying to.” His hands went up in surrender. “What I said the other day was outta line. I know that. I was stressed with this whole-“

“I have a litigation specialty. You can’t talk around me or play the victim. We all have our own shit going on but that doesn’t make it okay to try and pull punches you’ve already blindly thrown.” You rolled your eyes and pushed past him. Before you got very far, he caught your arm and spun you back to face him.

“I will break every bone in that hand.” You warned angrily. “Let go of me.”

“Let me make it up to you, huh?” He offered and you held back on rolling your eyes again. “Remember that guy I said that if he liked you, I’d be able to tell you more?”

“Yeah..” Now you were intrigued.

“Well I’m going to talk to him in a bit. Maybe you could come with me.”

“And if he doesn’t like me?”

“I got a feeling he will. Pick you up on my way?”

You took a minute to consider. Your gut was telling you that it was a direct path to Agent Orange. Maybe not a name, but a face and a potential location. It was a perfect chance, fallen into your lap. Could you really pass on it?

“Fine. But you’re not forgiven,” You said flatly. “Give me a few minutes to talk to Dinah.”

You knocked sharply on Dinah’s door before pushing in, the tense conversation between her and some other agent coming to a screeching halt. You looked awkwardly between them and the annoyance sat heavily in the air.

“Sorry, am I interrupting?” You asked carefully while subtly activating your implant and the man sighed but gestured for Dinah to answer.

“No, it’s fine.” She gave a tight smile. “Something I can help you with, Agent Y/L/N?”

“Agent?” The man’s head popped up. “Jesus, Dinah, who else are you bringing in?” He looked over to you and nodded slightly. “No offense.”

“None taken. And I’m from FBI SWAT, actually.” You corrected. “Agent Madani had reached out to collaborate on a case. Lotta things we need to catch up on… Got word of something down in Kentucky you might be interested in.” You glanced around her office to try and pinpoint where the feedback in your head was coming from. All you could figure out was a direction, somewhere on her bookshelf. 

“FBI? Dinah, you’ve gotta be kidding.” The man urged quietly.

“It’s not official.” You scanned the objects on the shelves but without your mask or even the pocket tech you used in Lieberman’s home, you wouldn’t find it. You cursed silently before facing the expectant stares. “Just a consultation from a friend but I can see this is a bad time. Should we get something on the books for later, an evening meeting maybe? My treat.”

“Yes, that’d be great.” She sighed in relief.

You smiled slightly and scribbled ‘bugged?’ with two sharp underlines. She shot you a questioning look but you simply raised your brows with a knowing smirk before you left.

You didn’t know what took you back to the compound. Pure curiosity to see if Frank was still around, maybe. Truthfully, if Frank did leave, then Lieberman’s situation was no longer your problem. Orange and Billy and the Lieberman family wouldn’t matter to you. You owed them nothing so why would you continue to figure anything out for them?

But when you walked in, a mix of relief and disappointment ran through you before disappearing down the crater. Frank was still around.

“Colonel Morty Bennett, Fort Byron.” Lieberman began, pausing when you quietly approached the countertop with the map spread across it.

Your eyes scanned it as Frank pointed to various points and talked out the plan. Your head tilted in thought as to how to insert yourself but you’d need a bit more intel on Bennett before you could find somewhere to slip in.

“…entertains at home, every Saturday night, like clockwork.” Lieberman explained and an idea clicked in your head. 

“What kind of entertaining? Like a dinner party?” You asked, already planning five personas for different scenarios.

“Not exactly, no.” He answered, now feeling awkward. “Female company.”

“Oh… Oh.” You nodded in understanding. “There’s my way in then.”

“No.” Frank cut in suddenly but you ignored him.

“Can you get me the name of the company he used and if he has a favorite date?”

“Yeah, I can do that.” Lieberman answered while Frank argued, “You’re not doing it.”

“I’ve done it a thousand times.” You said flatly. “Bat my eyes, laugh a little, wear a short skirt. Never even have to touch them.”

“Y/N.” He said firmly.

“That way it’s not two people sneaking onto an army base. I pass myself off as the expected guest, flash Bennett the big doe eyes and get the intel we’re looking for before I knock him out and get out of there. What is your issue?” You pressed but Frank scoffed and mumbled something under his breath. You rolled your eyes and turned back to Lieberman. “Send me the info, please. I have another string I’ve gotta pull on.”

“Are you listening to me?” Frank countered angrily before Lieberman could say anything. “You’re not gonna pass yourself off as a goddamn escort. You come in my way or you don’t come at all. Got it?”

You went back to your apartment after that and waited for Billy’s arrival. He knocked on your door after about a half hour of you being home and you said almost nothing to him on the drive. He tried to pry about what you wanted to talk to Dinah about, and all you said was that maybe he wasn’t the only one rolling around the sheets with her. You stared out the window for most of the drive, though almost nothing stood out. When you pulled up to the house, you were quick to open your phone and pin the location before Billy led you in.

He told you to wander the place while he talked to his friend and that he’d find you in a few minutes. You said nothing, just began strolling the halls. You managed to stay out of sight enough that Bily didn’t notice you knew exactly what room he went into. A few minutes after Billy went in, so did another man. You didn’t see his face, just the back of his head. You crept to the door and stayed just outside.

The outline of where your mask would sit burned and you wished you had the familiar device. You could record on your phone, sure, but the quality wouldn’t be half as good. You could miss something and by the time you got it out to begin with, who knows what would’ve come and gone. And to get it close enough for clear audio would’ve likely meant it would be seen.

“There’s no way she gets to Castle before we do.” Billy said calmly and your mouth hung open for a moment. “Trust me, I know him.”

We. That was all the confirmation you needed, but for Frank to believe you, you’d need more. But was the ‘she ‘ you or Dinah?

“Clearly not as well as you think you do.” The other man countered and you committed the voice to memory. The tone, the register, the dialect. You needed every detail you could. “You should’ve killed him when you had the chance. The country had too much to lose for Frank Castle to expose me… Unless the other one has gotten in your head.”

“You think this has something to do with Y/N?” Billy laughed.

“It doesn’t? Hard to argue with Columbia Law.”

Had Billy talked about you or had Orange done his own research? The thought that he knew you before you ever knew him sent a chill through your veins. You rationalized it as public knowledge after Frank’s case blew up but the discomfort settled in the pit of your stomach like a rock.

“You try to win an argument with her.” Billy muttered, likely into a glass. “I don’t think she wants to get too involved in any of this anyways. Far as she knows, I’m trynna help and she’s not trynna stop it.”

“You should know that if it comes to me getting exposed, you’ll be right there with me. No more government contracts, no more Anvil. No Mr. Billy Russo or dating Ms. Y/L/N. ”

“So I should’ve just… What? Killed him on the pier in broad daylight in front of a calzone truck?”

“That girl in the mask he used to work with...” Orange answered thoughtfully and your body tensed, only for a moment. “Former assassin likely operates like a sniper if you open up the checkbook. Maybe I should find her instead…”

“You know… I always thought of you as more of a hands-on kinda guy. Your face when you were working over those Afghans, they would talk and talk, scared shitless. Terrified and you’d just keep on hitting them and then there would come this moment…”

You wondered where the hell this reminiscing was going. You needed a good time to just ‘innocently stumble’ into the room and make an introduction. You needed to see the man’s face. You were so goddamned close. To be so close and unarmed made you feel like an idiot, but then again, you were nothing if not resourceful.

“Is that your thing, Rawlins?” Billy taunted and your head whipped up.

Rawlins. Agent Rawlins.

“ Достаточно просто.” You whispered and you nearly smiled. That was a huge victory for your side. (Easy enough.)

“Every man’s got a thing.” Billy continued.

“Stay on point, Lieutenant.” Rawlins commanded and there was a bubble of frustration from the man.

“Oh, I am right on point.” Billy responded quickly and your brows raised in interest. You focused in on what Billy was feeling, the deep feeling of being slighted, and you spun your finger like a dial and gradually raised it. “I remember seeing that look on your face once, that fear. When Frank gave you that milky eye, he was gonna keep right on going too. And you knew it too.”

As Billy spoke, the bitter taste of fear settled on your tongue and you could’ve sworn it came with the memory of the altercation. Being pinned under Frank, fearing it was all ending and there was nothing to be done otherwise. It was almost enough to make your head spin, though it did make you a tad nauseous.

“I made you.” Rawlins said in a matter-of-fact tone, though it didn’t hide what he truly felt. He was indebted to Billy for saving him from Frank, but due to some sick power dynamic, he convinced Billy that he was an inferior. Maybe it was rank, maybe it was manipulation.

“Are we gonna warn Morty Bennett that Frank Castle might be coming for him?” Billy asked, a new mocking tone in his voice. You watched his figure come into view from your hidden angle and his head turned in your direction. You held your breath and waited for a reaction, but there was no acknowledgment other than a slight smirk.

You assumed he had seen you, that you had lost your touch for espionage. But he said nothing, showed nothing, in regards to your presence. Maybe he was just assuming you’d show up at the doorframe to listen. 

“Morty has the instincts of a rat and the courage of a rabbit.” Rawlins reasoned. “We tell him Castle is still living, one of two things happen. He runs or he talks.”

“So why not just kill him too?”

Shit.

Hearing Billy say ‘too’ only affirmed your theory that Rawlins was looking for a way to kill Frank. Billy was intended to be his Trojan Horse to get close enough to Frank to get it done. The real question left was who would Billy choose when push came to shove.

“Not if we don’t have to. Too many questions. We want Morty alive and where we can find him. When Castle finally turns up, we’re gonna save his life anyway. So what can he complain about?”

“I’ll gather up my best.” Billy nodded and you heard his footsteps nearing the door. You hurried a few feet away before walking towards the room with your head turning as if distracted by something, leading you to bump into Billy.

“Every window is bulletproof.” You said simply.

“They’re double-paned.” Rawlins corrected, suddenly behind Billy.

“No, they’re not. They’re bulletproof.” You said again.

Rawlins offered a condescending smile that you nearly knocked off.

“See for yourself.” You gestured to the nearest window and the men followed you over. “If it were just double-paned like you said, you’d see the gap between the glass where it fits into the frame. But instead you can see the edges where the panels were melded together, making it classified as bulletproof.”

“Meet Y/N Y/L/N.” Billy said proudly as his hand came to your shoulder. “One of the best.”

“You didn’t say she was so… knowledgable.” Rawlins answered, staring at the glass for a few more minutes before looking to you.

“I consider myself a woman of many talents.” You lifted your chin slightly, daring him to say something.

“Pleasure to meet you.” He finally said with a slight bow of his head.

“Yes, I’m sure it is… And me being knowledgeable is a perk of coming from Columbia Law, but I’m sure you knew that already.”

“Yes, Billy has mentioned that you’re a lawyer.”

“You knew that beforehand.”

“Excuse me?”

“I was hard to miss.” You shrugged. “Being that I was Frank Castle’s lawyer.”

“Were you?” He feigned surprise.

“You’re a terrible bluff.” You said flatly. “And you’re what, CIA? I bet you tried to figure out my whole life story.”

“Not much of a story.” He shrugged slightly. “Overseas orphan turned law prodigy… Unless there is something more interesting about you, Ms. Y/L/N?”

“I’m sure Agent Madani would be more interesting… That’s why you bugged her office right? And why you have Billy keep in touch with her? Unless Billy’s pulling a fast one and gonna double cross her. She wouldn’t see it coming, I bet.”

“Double cross her how?” He shook his head slightly and the condescension in the gesture made your chest rumble.

“You can call yourself whatever you want, y’know. Rawlins. Orange. It doesn’t change that you’re a coward, hiding behind someone else and forcing them to act for you. You see, I know men like you, that pretend their power comes from the shadows they operate in, but what happens when the ones that gave you the shadow step? What would you have left? Ничего. “ (Nothing.)

His eyes narrowed and Billy was quick to end the conversation and steer you out.

Now the game was getting fun.

“What did he mean that he made you?” You asked during the drive back to your apartment.

“Nothing.” Billy shook his head. “He helped get a couple of contracts for Anvil but nothing much.”

“He wants Frank dead. Frank wants him dead. What do you want?”

He blew out a long sigh as he thought of an answer, as if he hadn’t been asked that during the endeavor.

“I want my friend.” He finally settled.

“Your friend will want the head of the man that pulled the strings of the man that had his family killed.”

“How’d you know that?” “Cause I felt that way.” You answered quickly and suddenly felt that your hands weres slick with blood again. But looking down, they were clean. “A while ago when a friend of mine from college came back, this cult was trying to recruit her. They swore she was their idol and she was meant for them. She refused and they killed her for it, said she would be reborn in a way that serves her true purpose… When I found the man above the one that killed her, I killed him. No hesitation. I don’t regret it and Frank wouldn’t either.”

“Like I said, Y/N, I wanna help Frank.” He said with enough insistence that you nearly believed it.

“Would you help him kill Orange?”

“I don’t think Frankie would need my help for that… You want in on this?”

“I’m not gonna go against Frank.” You said plainly. “We didn’t see eye to eye on everything but I know he wouldn’t pull a trigger on me.”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t ask you to.” He said honestly, and you believed he meant that.

“Would you back me up if I had to take down your team to keep him alive?”

“Long as it looks like we saved Bennett, I’m not gonna get in your way.” He shrugged. “You in?”

“I’m only doing this to find out if he’s really alive.” You agreed.

“If you had answered my call the other day, you could’ve come with me to meet with him.” He snorted a laugh.

You needed a way in that wasn’t Frank anyway.

It was the next night when you were walking through Fort Byron. It was a small team you were with, four men counting Billy. They wore the expected lightweight tactical gear but you wore a simple fitted outfit, enough to pass as Bennett’s company but nothing that would restrict your movement. You were practically unarmed, save for the retractable blade hidden under your sleeve and two shock disks and a smoke bomb in your front pocket.

You two were sitting at the table and the man was droning on about his week on post and how awful it was. While you were running your finger discreetly on your scar to find whatever channel Lieberman was using, you picked up the glass of wine and smelled it. Bennett attempted an apology but you simply stared at him while you poured the glass on the floor. You quirked a brow in light challenge before he gulped and got down on the floor, licking the spilled wine like a dog.

“Боже, это жалко.“ You said to yourself with a small eye roll. When the man tried to turn and look up at you, you put your foot on his back and forced him back to the ground. (God, that’s pathetic.)

After a few minutes, the sound of Bennett lapping at the puddle annoyed you so you got up and pulled the man to his feet. He opened his mouth to speak but you rolled up one of the napkins and shoved it in his mouth instead. He made a face of shock before you pushed him to lean on the table.

You took a few minutes to wander the dining room, looking for anything of interest but you found nothing. When you heard Bennett’s muffled voice, you returned to the table and picked up one of the tall burning candles. You tilted it so the dripping wax would land on his hand, causing a smothered shout before a gleeful laugh. You had to refrain from making a face of disgust at the sound.

“I expect you to be quiet unless I ask you to speak.” You said simply, holding in your gag at the man’s arousal due to the situation. “Nod.”

He nodded eagerly and you rolled your eyes. You moved closer to the window and saw figures crouching in the bushes. You leaned in slightly and saw what looked like Billy’s face between the branches. When your eyes adjusted the lower light, you noticed the shadowed figure hiding moving around to the other door. You smirked slightly before returning to the table.

The comms device fitted in your ear was relaying the mindless chatter from the men outside, waiting for your signal. You calculated how much time you could

give Frank before you had to alert them. If you didn’t, it would be obvious that you let Frank go. So you figured enough time for Frank to start whatever he was doing and for you to deploy your smoke would be sufficient.

You hauled Bennett up by the back of his coat and forced him against the wall in his office, which was just the next room over. You went back to the dining room and scanned the contents of the table, finding a clean napkin, an untouched glass of water, and one of the steak knives. You heard the front door opening and knew you only had a short window before Billy’s team crashed the building. You poured the water over the napkin while Frank found you in the dining room. You pointed towards Bennett without looking up and used the steak knife to cut two small holes in the napkin.

Frank muttered his complaints and confusion about your presence but he said nothing directly. You knew it would be a whole can of worms the next time you were at the compound, but that would be a problem for future Y/N. In the meantime, you focused on your makeshift gear.

You intended to use it like a filter over your nose and mouth. Seeing through the smoke might prove troublesome and it’d likely burn your eyes, but if you couldn’t breathe, then you wouldn’t be able to fight. You heard Lieberman give the time estimate and you knew you could buy them that.

“Smoke.” You held your comms in your ear as you spoke quickly, draping the wet cloth over your face before you moved into the office.

Lieberman’s voice echoed on the other side of your head.

What? How did- Y/N? What smoke?

“Castle.” You said as you entered, both getting Frank’s attention and alerting the team waiting outside. “Thirty seconds to breach.”

You’ve got four hostels headed your way. They’re moving fast.

Frank threw Bennett into the nearest closet but you stopped him before he closed the door. You knelt down to be eye to eye with the cowardly man - which you hated to admit lived right up to Rawlin’s description - and used the steak knife still in your hand to press it against the side of his neck.

“You make one sound…” You said lowly, watching the yellow haze spread across his pupils as the words fell. “I will slit you open and watch you drown in your own blood. Understand?”

He nodded feverently and shoved the napkin gag back in his mouth. You hummed in delight and patted his cheek before you stood and knocked the door shut.

You heard the clink of canisters before the sound of aerosol filled the silence. You looked to Frank, who pulled a ski mask over his face, and he offered you a sharp nod. You gripped the steak knife a little tighter before you moved carefully into the next room and pulled your own smoke bomb and slammed it to the floor.

You were quick to press yourself against the nearest wall when you saw the red beams through the smoke. It was already burning your eyes and you felt the tears welling but you blinked them away, listening for footsteps. The team was careful to tread lightly and you cursed not having your mask to see through it all. They stayed relatively close together and you tried to tell the vague figures apart.

In those minute vulnerable moments of simply

observing, you also found Billy’s determination in his mission. What his exact mission was, you couldn’t say, but at least you knew who to go after last.

When one of the men was within your range, you acted quickly. You kicked the barrel of the gun away and jammed your elbow against his spine. With one hand, you yanked his helmet off so the other could grab the side of his head. You slammed his head into the nearest stud of the wall and watched him drop to the floor. You moved to his gun and flicked off the light. When you looked back up to find the next, you saw a second red light turn off.

You breathed in a deep sigh of annoyance before you began creeping forward. You realized you had dropped your small blade as you stayed low to the ground, listening for steps and watching for their feet.

More than halfway, how we doin’ in there?

You weren’t going to answer. You heard the sounds of a nearby interaction and you assumed Frank had it covered. As you followed the last one, you recognized that it was Billy.

Of course it was.

Bennett’s fear continued to rise and you knew that once the door opened, it would spill out and fill the room as dense as the current smoke was. You saw a figure in your peripherals with their red beam shining so you abandoned your stalk of Billy and moved towards the other.

You caught up to him quickly and grabbed the strap of his rifle to pull him to his back. He tried to redirect his weapon in a panic, firing a few quick shots that echoed in your ear and triggered the explosions in your chest. You knelt on his chest and tried to wrestle the gun free while you heard the rushed steps coming closer.

You ditched the tug of war and began to spin it instead, watching the strap tangle itself and put more pressure across his chest. He coughed and tried to release the strap but you didn’t let him. You repositioned your knee to block the clip and quickly looked around for something to end it with. You saw a thick ceramic knick-knack on the nearest end table so you reached for it. You had to shift your weight off his chest to reach it and it was enough of a shift for him to be able to push you off completely. You landed with a groan before you got up and grabbed the trinket, the other hand slipping to your pocket for the disk. The red dot settled on your chest but you snapped the disk forward before he could fire. The small device landed against his forehead and you heard the crackle, but the man fell limp regardless.

When Billy got to the scene, you had barely gotten far enough that the smoke covered your frame. You nearly held your breath just in case while he looked carefully into the darkness.

You heard the Lieberman’s countdown in your head just before a pistol went off. You abandoned your hiding place quickly, pushing past Billy without a thought, and ran towards the sound of the gun. You had just missed the altercation but you heard the glass shattering down the hall. You followed the commotion again and saw one of the men from the team shooting at a fleeing figure across the lawn. You quickly yanked the other disk from your pocket and threw it against the man’s back.

He fell to his knees so you took a second to pull the wet cloth off your face but before you could make any other move, you were grabbed by your shoulder from behind. You reacted quickly and elbowed the person in the stomach. You turned on the man and flicked out the blade at your wrist instinctively. You swung it aggressively, though he batted your hand away. You threw your other hand wildly but he caught it with ease, bringing a new rage across your skin. His other hand went to the back of your head and pushed it down, simultaneously using the hold on your hand to throw you into a spin. You were slightly disoriented when you faced him again and he was quick to wrap his hand around your throat. He backed you against the wall, pinning your caught hand about your head.

You raised a knee quickly and managed to get it against his lower abdomen, you positioned your bladed hand at the base of his throat so the tip threatened to pierce under his chin. Staring at the man for a second, you realized it was Billy and you let yourself smile.

“Having fun?” You teased and he smirked back at you.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” The man you had thrown the disk at just moments before yelled from behind Billy.

“You gonna handle that or should I?” You nodded to the man without breaking eye contact with Billy.

“Go find everyone else.” Billy said simply, refusing to look away either.

The other man scoffed and mumbled something about how you got away with it cause you’re hot.

“They’re gonna think you’ve gone soft for me.” You said with a playful tone to your voice.

“For you?” His brows raised and he shook his head slightly. “No, I’m hard as ever.”

“Nothing like a knife to your throat to set the mood, right?” You continued and slid your knee lower, earning a small groan from him. “Don’t you have a job to finish?”

“Can’t do anything when you got me like this… What’re we gonna do about it?”

“Can’t do anything when you got me like this.” You nodded to the hand above your head.

“Well..” He chuckled and you bit your lip to keep the smile back.

“You got Morty and the team waiting in the other room.”

“Yeah, you’re not the quietest.” He joked and slowly stepped away and tapped his fingers under your chin with a wink.

You hummed slightly and looked down the hall to the broken window. You had to trust that Frank got away, pulled something out his sleeve and was on his way back to the compound. Until you knew otherwise, you had no reason to doubt him. When Billy finally had his blood flow back to his head, you followed him back to Morty’s office.

“That was a shit show.” He announced as he entered, you right behind him. 

“Yeah, cause this bitch wants to flip sides in the middle

of the job.” One of the men commented.

“The bitch can still break your jaw.” You warned sharply, your accent dancing on the edge of your tongue.

“The hell are you doing here?” Morty asked Billy, thankfully taking Billy’s and your attention back. “Oh Christ. She’s with you?”

“We’re saving your life, Morty.” Billy answered. “So why don’t you put your pants on and then you’re gonna say exactly what I tell you to say when I tell you to say it.”

You had to admit that despite Billy’s loyalty being seemingly based on coin flips, something about seeing him in that firm and commanding circumstance reminded you of why you liked him in the first place. You smirked slightly and you looked up at him, knowing your expression was one of clear admiration. And it wasn’t any sort of romantic or loving admiration. It was attraction. It was your own magnetism to and for power, to and for violence. Billy was both good for you and bad, good for business and bad.

When all was said and done, you realized you had no idea what Frank and Lieberman actually did. You didn’t know what the countdown was for. It was more than just testing the theory that Rawlins knew what was happening. But if anyone had asked what the hell happened on the other side of things, you’d have no real answer. But you knew that there was one thing that you could and would have to answer to Frank for.

And that was what the hell you were doing there.

Billy sent the other guys away, leaving you and him to deal with Bennett. You and him drove the man to the same place you two had been to meet with Rawlins. You and Billy both went off to change, though you simply exchanged your form fitting top for a sweater Billy brought for you. He joked about how it took you long enough to wear his clothes instead, and you knew it was a jab at your refusal to stay out of Matt’s drawers, but you ignored it.

You walked into the study and his hand was on your lower back. You two were instantly hit with an accusation from Morty. Billy sat on the back of the couch and hooked his fingers into your front pocket to pull you to stand between his legs so he could have his arm around your hips. You rested your arm on his shoulder while your fingers ran along the back of his neck and leaned into him slightly.

“And her!” He yelled and turned on you, throwing a pointed finger in your direction. “She put a knife to my neck!”

You offered a sarcastic expression and flipped him off, which made Billy chuckle slightly from beside you. He leaned away to pour two glasses of liquor and pressed one into your hand while Morty and Rawlins continued their little back and forth.

“Y’know, without us…” Billy began, looking up at you for a second before going back to the conversation. “Frank Castle would have your balls wired to a car battery by now.”

“Yeah, but he pays women to step on his balls so he probably wouldn’t even feel it.” You added on. “If he did, he’d probably finish right then and there.”

“Kiss my ass, Lieutenant Russo.” Morty spat back. “You too, you cheap skank.”

“You couldn’t afford me.” You retorted with a small step forward but Billy’s hand on your leg stopped you.

“What did you tell Frank Castle?” Rawlins asked calmly.

“Nothing.” Morty admitted.

“Did he take anything?” Billy asked.

“Did he take anything? He was trying to take me!”

“No he wasn’t.” You muttered into your glass.

“Excuse me?”

“He wasn’t gonna take you.” You repeated. “He knows about what you did, stuffing the drugs in the KIA’s that got sent back, but you aren’t the big ticket. He is.” You gestured to Rawlins, who was sat behind his desk with his hand folded like a cartoon villain.

“You give him any names?” Billy asked again.

“No.” Morty dragged out the syllable. “I told him to kiss my ass.”

“No you didn’t.” You laughed. “You begged him not to kill you. You didn’t say anything cause you didn’t have the time… Castle wasn’t looking for you to say the name to begin with.” You realized the last part as you said it.

He never needed Morty to give Orange’s identity because Lieberman has another way of getting it. Lieberman’s specialty was tech, survelliance, hacking. The more complicated version of what you could do. Frank was acting as a smokescreen while Lieberman worked behind the curtain.

You were so lost in putting the pieces together that when Billy tapped the back of your thigh, you jumped slightly. He stood up slowly and you backed away a few steps, but you caught the questioning look that only lasted for a second. Once he began to turn away from you, it was all business again.

[petertingle-yipyip]

WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE

ten - is it over now?

tags: n/a // nine // finale // masterlist

Pairing: frank x reader, billy x reader

Word Count: 11, 189

Summary: A long time coming, one fight comes to a bloody conclusion. Another lurks in the near future, and the connection between two friends and two lover is severed.

You weren’t supposed to be in the room, so you weren’t. You weren’t supposed to linger by the door and eavesdrop, so you didn’t. You were involved in the situation after all.

Highly involved.

And not just as FBI, protecting a civilian reporter from a terrorist during an active investigation, but as an agent that let Frank Castle get away.  That sided with Frank Castle.

You may not have been in the room, but you heard it all. You managed to get a surveillance piece onto Brett’s jacket so once you flipped your implant, it was as good as being in the room with them.

They talked about Lewis’ attempt at Anvil, Billy’s denial and your consultation. You almost cursed at the connection, but at least you weren’t on the payroll for Anvil anymore. It did show that you and Billy had a relationship outside of the company, but should he and Anvil go down for Sam Stein, you wouldn’t be connected to him. Only connected to Dinah.

The word negligence was thrown around and you almost laughed. It reminded you of how Billy shoved his own team into your line of fire to save himself. A pathetic excuse of a man, cloaked by his confidence and good looks. You were glad you saw who he truly was but that didn’t make it sting any less. Not hurt, per say, just sting.

Brett interviewed Ori and then Karen, and you pretty much knew how those interviews would go so you didn’t care to listen. Dinah next, and you last.

“Best for last, huh?” You joked as you sat on the couch, running hands over your pant leg. There was no blood beside the dried remnants from the prior chaos, but they still felt soaked. Dripping, ready to stain whatever you touched. 

“Who’s story you hoping I corroborate?”

“None.” He shrugged. “I just wanna know yours.”

“Castle wasn’t working with Lewis.” You said plainly. “Everyone’s throwing the allegation but it’s not true. Lewis was a guy who was misguided by a fraud to the point that he radicalized the Punsiher’s ideology.”

“Seemed pretty radical on its own.”

“Consequence?” You brows raised. “Castle didn’t hurt random people. It was intentful. It was specified. He killed drug dealers and rapists and murderers.”

“Guess after defending him in court you’re bound to take his side.”

“You’re saying I have a bias.” You pointed out. “I was here at my bureau’s direction. Nothing was about Castle from my end.”

“So the FBI doesn’t want Castle?”

“I wasn’t dispatched for Castle. My team and I were sent to apprehend Lewis.”

“So why do my officers tell me you and Billy Russo were pointing guns at each other?”

“He shot at me first.” You shrugged. The shot was meant for Frank in all actuality, but at that point, it was all the same. “Interfering with a federal investigation. Attempted assault of a federal agent. Aggravated assault against Castle. Should I go on?”

“You’re making me wish I was dealing with Murdock again.” He huffed. “Even Nelson and the cigars he would buy my mom.”

“Yeah, they’re a lot nicer.” You agreed.

“Not even that… Just less combative.”

You shrugged. It was all the same at that point.

“You fired your weapon, Y/N.” He sighed.

“Yeah.”

“Then took off with Castle.”

“Mhmm.”

“Why?”

“Cause he was helping me get to Karen.” You said honestly. “We saw Lewis take her and I knew Frank wasn’t going to hurt me. Wouldn’t let anyone else hurt me either.”

“Why are you so convinced he’s innocent? You want me to see a bigger picture here. Paint it for me.”

“You worked the Castle case first time around. You, on some level, know him. You don’t think he’s a terrorist anymore than I do, but the question now Brett, is whether anyone is going give someone a chance to prove that before they put a bullet in him?”

“You’re insane, you know that?”

“Yeah.” You laughed a little before you turned to leave. “So I’ve been told.”

“We’re not done.” He said, though there was no effort to stop you.

“I’ve got my own team to catch up with and an SAC to debrief. You know where to find me.”

You found Dinah and Karen talking down the hall so you walked up to them with a small smile for greeting.

“You two have a connection, I know that.” Dinah looked over at you. “So do you… If you know where he is or how to contact him, please.”

“Micro reached out to you, didn’t he?” You said quietly as you realized something. “You said a name in the stairwell.”

She nodded slightly before facing Karen again.

“I’m the best chance he’s got.” She urged.

“I’d beg to differ.” Karen looked at you and you gave a small nod before she took Dinah’s card. “He’s not what they say he is… Saved my life, again.”

You excused yourself at that point because Dex had made his way up, along with the other two from your team. They were in rough shape but definitely better than you. You could feel the bruises across your torso growing but EMS had removed the shrapnel. Your forehead was cleaned and bandaged, you having refused the stitches. 

Your SAC thoroughly chewed you out at debrief. She scolded you for abandoning your team, disabling comms, and ultimately going rogue. She said you should’ve eliminated Lewis at the beginning, before the hostage situation, then taken Castle into custody. She yelled that Billy Russo never should’ve been a player in the game. When you tried to reason that Billy had his fair part in it, she didn’t want to hear it.

You didn’t care enough to manipulate her either so you just let her talk.

Dex stepped in and backed you on siding with Castle. He said that since you knew Castle, you knew whether or not he was an asset or a threat in that situation. He even said that more people would’ve died if you tried to fight Castle.

“Wanna tell me what your plan is?” Dex asked once you two were out of your SAC’s office.

“Partner with Madani from Homeland.” You began. “Find Castle. Go after Russo.”

“What’s your deal with Russo anyway?”

“He killed a Homeland agent and a military colonel, both that I witnessed. He shot at me, obstructed a federal operation. I want to go after him, Dex.”

“So it’s personal. You’re gonna risk your career on a vendetta?”

“Exactly, my career.” You agreed. “You’re not gonna talk me out of it.”

“Alright.” He nodded. “How do we do it then?”

“We don’t do anything.” You shook your head. “Madani and I will build a case and I’ll let her bureau do the rest.”

“C’mon, Y/N/N. That’s it?”

“He killed one of theirs.” You shrugged. “What else am I supposed to do?”

“If you need my help with any of this, you call me. Got it?”

You nodded with a grateful smile before you hurried out the building. You practically ran to your car and sped across town to the compound, thanking Matt’s God for every green light.

When you got in, you found both men in the poorly lit bathroom. Shrapnel bits were littered in the sink and Frank’s shirt was torn in pieces on the floor. Lieberman moved to try and stitch the gunshot line on Frank’s temple but he jerked away. You went over and took the supplies from Lieberman’s hands, easily switching places. Lieberman wished you luck, said Frank won’t talk, and patted your back before he left.

You said nothing as you cleaned up the blood on the side of Frank’s head. A million questions lingered in the air yet neither of you dared to voice them. Saying it out loud made it real, and despite you both seeing it with your own eyes, some part wanted to deny it.

“I’m sorry.” You finally said, focusing on your stitching instead of Frank’s stare reflecting off the shattered mirror. “About Billy.”

“You knew he was dirty?” He said lowly, angrily. “That was you were trynna tell me, hmm?”

“I knew he was working with Rawlins, yeah. I wanted proof but I was holding out, hoping he was doing what I was doing. Playing both sides, looking out for you, y’know? … I was wrong.”

“How long have you known?”

“I never trusted his involvement to begin with. But I didn’t know until after he started airing the radio call. We went to that CIA safe house you found Rawlins at. I met the guy and pretty much called him out.”

You dared to look at his expression and saw a blank canvas.

“It was just before Bennett. He was there, part of my way in was being on his team, and he didn’t stop me from helping you so I guess I figured…” You shrugged, sighing heavily before you broke the thread. “It’s my fault this happened.”

“What?” He turned to you. “What are you talking about?”

“This.” You gestured to the gunshot. “I let my feelings intervene again and someone else got hurt.”

“Feelings? Y/N, what do you mean, feelings? You think you having a crush on Russo changed anything?”

You were quiet.

“You said he was dirty the whole time, so you sleeping with him or going out with him, it wouldn’t have changed anything! No, Bill… He made his choice, okay? And it’s got nothing, nothing, to do with you.”

“I should’ve led him away.” You said instead. “I should’ve smokescreened and left him in the dark like Dinah was.”

He scoffed at her name.

“I know he went behind your back going to Dinah, but he just wants to get back to his family.” You tried to defend. “Cut him some slack… I was probably gonna slip Dinah some information to get her on Rawlins’ tail soon anyway.”

“What are you gonna do now?” He asked instead.

“After cleaning you up?” You tried to joke while you moved his arm to see the gashes left from the shrapnel. “Partner with Dinah. Pretend to look for you. Go after Russo.” You rattled off the items on your mental list.

“What about the FBI?”

You shrugged. “My partner knows what I want. He’s got my back if I need him.”

“Sure you can trust this one?”

“Nope… But I’ve taken bigger gambles before. No one believed I should’ve defended the Punisher in court and he turned out to be a good guy.”

He snorted slightly.

“Madani’s gonna wanna do it the right way.” He commented, an off-handed remark that was meant as a question.

“I know.” You answered honestly.

“Do you?”

“I'm not looking for revenge. I’m looking to win. As long as he goes down, for now I don’t care how.”

You two didn’t talk about it after that. You cleaned and dressed the rest of his wounds. He offered to return the favor for your forehead but you assured him your body was already taking care of it, utilizing the heat that lived under your skin to weld yourself back together. You didn’t stay much longer either.

After you got home. Dinah called and asked for you to come to her office the next day. She assured you she had a plan and she would explain in person. Since you had no ideas on where to start, you agreed.

“Did you see the news?” She asked when you shut her office door behind yourself.

“About the hotel?”

“Billy’s interview.” She clarified.

“Oh… Not much.”

“He doesn’t get to pretend he’s a hero here.”

“Okay. So what’s the plan?”

“Well, you and I both know he killed Stein.” She began, a haunted look in her eyes.

“During a blacked-out sting attempt.” You specified. “Aren’t you worried about that at all?”

“Rafi already knows.”

You made a face at the name since you weren’t exactly sure who that was but said nothing as she continued.

“What you and I need is to get him to admit it. Or even admit just being there.”

“How do we do that? Billy’s gonna be expecting both of us to come after him.”

“Not together.”

“Probably together. He knew I’ve been talking to you about everything lately. Both of us had guns on him at the hotel. It’d be more surprising if we didn’t team up.”

“It doesn’t matter.” She said tightly, a controlled outburst. “Are you going to help me or not?”

“That’s why I’m here.” You nodded. “Even if he admits it, how do we-“

Your question was cut short when another agent stepped in and said “He’s on his way up.”

“Who’s he, Dinah?” You asked, moderately annoyed since you already knew the answer.

She simply gathered her paperwork and gestured for you to follow her. You let out a long, silent sigh as you obliged. As you went down the hall, you could feel it coming up the elevator.

Confidence, bordering on arrogance.

Billy.

“When this inevitably goes sideways, step aside and let me handle it.” You said once you two were alone in the conference room, seconds ticking down till Billy’s arrival.

“Listen, just because you have some undisclosed skills doesn’t give you any authority here. You are in my department.”

“I know.” You nodded.

“This is my investigation. You don’t get to tell me how it’ll go.”

“That’s not what that was.” You shrugged. “But this is. He’s gonna come in here and it’ll seem like you’re in control until he flips it on you and suddenly, you’re playing his game. At that point, there’s three choices. One, you walk away with your tail between your legs and he thinks he’s won, which he would have. Two, you miraculously keep your composure and work your way through it. Or three, the most likely, I take over and worst case scenario, it’s a stalemate.”

“You don’t ge-“

“You came to me for help.” You cut in as light knocks sounded. “Remember that.”

Billy was ushered in and his eyes met yours first. It was as if he was looking for you. You simply gestured to the other side of the table while Dinah opened with pleasantries and moved to the camera.

“Lawyers are for the guilty.” Billy said, a pointed glance at you.

You rolled your eyes and reached behind Dinah to press the record button.

“Special Agent Y/L/N with the FBI, assisting with today’s interview.” You continued to rattle off the date and time before Dinah did her introduction. “State your name for the record, last name first.”

“Russo, William.” Billy said flatly, not making any effort to hide his annoyance.

“Mr. Russo, laid out before you are several photos from a recent crime scene.” You began as Dinah laid out the pictures. “Please examine them carefully and let us know if anything looks familiar.”

“Are you gonna Mirandaize me, Agent Y/L/N?” He deflected instead, using your name mockingly.

“No need.” Dinah answered. “Unless I decide to arrest you. We’re just talking.”

You didn’t miss the emphasis she put on it being her choice.

“Why am I here, Dinah?”

Dinah placed a photo of Stein on the table. Covered in his own blood, blood that was also on your hands. You rubbed your hands in the side of your legs when they suddenly felt warm and wet.

“Because you’re a murderer who’s gonna pay for the lives you took.”

A faint blue trail followed her fingers, hovered over the photo.

“Agent.” You said in quiet warning to which she shrugged you off.

“The only reason I was there that day was you.” Billy answered after a few seconds of him silently looking at the picture. Whether he was fabricating his story or simply digesting the empty look in Stein’s eyes - eyes you had watched the light fade out of - you couldn’t tell. “I was there to take you home. I remember going back to your place, cleaning you up, holding you all night in the same bed that you and I had repeated sexual encounters.”

“Did you and Frank Castle conduct illegal covert operations in Kandahar?” She asked instead.

“What the hell?” You muttered and dropped your forehead to your hand.

“I’m sure you’ve perused my service record. Does it indicate that I was in Kandahar?” He countered. “Here’s what I think happened. I think you’re pissed that Frank Castle got away from you. Agent Y/L/N made sure of that, didn’t she?”

The mention of your name made you lift your head and he offered your a quick smirk, leaving as fast as it came on.

“But you’re looking to blame me so you sent your guys to come down to pick me up. But now you’re realizing that maybe that wasn’t such a smart move.”

“Make your choice.” You told her quietly, nodding slightly towards Billy to say that it was the moment you had predicted.

“Now if this was official,” Billy continued and you could

practically see the gears turning in Dinah’s head. “You wouldn’t be sitting there alone.”

“She’s not alone, Mr. Russo.” You spoke up, making the decision for her. “I’d like to circle back to something if you don’t mind.”

Billy turned to you with an amused expression and gestured for you to continue.

“You mentioned sexual encounters with Agent Madani.” You began.

“What are you doing?” She asked tightly but you ignored her, refusing to break eye contact with Billy.

There was a challenge in his expression as well as yours. Neither of you would back down.

“Yes. Don’t worry, I was getting to you and I as well.” Billy replied. “And this whole thing.” He made a vague gesture to the table and between you two. “Calling you agent, kinda hot.”

“Do you have some proof of you recently being at either of our residences for any extended periods of time?”

“Meaning?”

“Cell tower pings, location tags, GPS directions. Anything like that.”

“Most likely.”

“Great, and can you provide any specific dates?”

He scoffed lightly.

“Along with that, do you have proof of what occurred during these alleged encounters?”

“Proof?” His brows raised.

“Photos, videos, explicit text messages, audio recordings.”

“You wanna know if I made a tape?” He chuckled in disbelief.

“I want to know if you can back your allegations with evidence, should anything escalate.” You countered firmly. “Can you?”

“I don’t have pictures or videos.” He spat back in annoyance.

“Audio?”

“No.”

“Texts?”

“Doubtful. You’re very careful.”

You hummed slightly and he rolled his eyes, knowing you had beat him on that.

“Then your allegations are baseless and therefore irrelevant.” You smirked with a shrug.

Dinah pushed yourself up and shut off the camera. You sat back in your seat and folded your hands over your stomach, swiveling slightly side to side. Billy was still looking at you, an almost proud expression on his face that you didn’t acknowledge.

“You’re gonna tell me this room isn’t bugged?” Billy asked after a small stint of silence. “Can never be too careful.”

“Funny you mention that.” You offered a sarcastic expression. 

“I’ve got an offer for you, best and final.” Dinah said quickly and you spun in your chair to face her. Your brows were raised with an expectant expression. “I’ll guarantee leniency if you give me the executioners, the tortures, everything. And when I say everything, I need William Rawlins.”

You turned enough to see Billy’s reaction.

“You didn’t know I had Rawlins’ name.” Dinah bragged and again, Billy looked to you.

“Wasn’t me.” You shrugged. “Some NSA ghost story came around.”

“You killed Sam Stein.” Dinah continued. Her rage was filling the room, pushing out the air and threatening

to choke you. It was more than justice for her, though she’d never admit it. 

It was revenge. It was consequence. It was right up your alley, everything Exodus was built off of.

Maybe this was more her fight than Y/N’s. She could do more for Dinah than Y/N could. Avoid the red tape and bring a real conclusion.

“…life won’t be worth the termination-of-parental-rights form your mother scribbled her signature on.” Dinah spat and even you were taken back.

You almost said something about it but then remembered you weren’t with Billy. It was a sharp blow, even for you, but the woman was angry. And hell has no wrath like a woman scorned. You focused back in on the conversation as Dinah’s as vaguely threatening Billy before she left, leaving you and Billy alone in the room.

“Your head’s healing nice. Almost forgot you got hurt in the first place.” He commented instead of the question in his eyes. He didn’t trust the room wasn’t bugged so he didn’t dare to say what he really wanted.

“Yeah, cuts and bruises heal pretty okay for me.” You nodded. “The rib still hurts on deep breaths but that’s never gonna go away.”

“What are you doing, Y/N?” He asked quietly. “Getting mixed up in all this.”

“I’ve always been part of this, just not the way you expected. Started long before I met you, Bill… See you soon.”

You were barely out of the room when his hand was around your arm. You let out a quiet sigh while he pulled you down one of the nearby halls.

“I never wanted to hurt you, Y/N.” He said softly, the grip on your arm loosening while his thumb began to move against the fabric of your shirt. You made sure to put a hand on his chest to keep a fair distance between you two. “If there was another way…”

“Bill, all of this is your choice.” You insisted gently. “You could change it at any point if you let it.”

“I can’t…”

“I tried giving you the benefit of the doubt but you kept

proving me wrong time and time again. You put me in a position where I have to defend you time and time again. I have to bend my conviction again. I have to choose between you and him.”

“Then stop fighting!” He urged as a loud whisper.

“I can’t!” You answered in the same hushed tone. “As much as I like you, I can’t be on your side. You’ve proved that you’re not loyal to me and you’re not loyal to Frank… That man saw you as his brother, his family. How could you do this to him?”

“You like me?” He asked in genuine amazement.

“That’s what you heard?”

You scoffed to yourself and left after that, making your way to Dinah’s office. You walked in on her arguing with someone else that she introduced as Rafi, the man above her. They were yelling about the conflict of interest and you offered they watch the rest of the video but Rafi didn’t want to hear anything from you. You listened to the rest in silence but were told to find Castle and Micro.

You didn’t need to work very hard to do that.

Leaving Dinah’s office, you went straight to Frank and Lieberman. You walked in in a hurry to update them on what was going on. Dinah had gained nothing by bringing in Billy other than pissing the man off, but there was still some underlying desire to have you in his life. He didn’t want to lose you for good and you could manipulate that  but before you could say anything about the spray painted vest you caught a glimpse of, Frank had grabbed your arm.

You opened your mouth for a question but he pulled you against his chest and had his arms around you before you could find your voice. You froze for a second before returning the embrace. Maybe it was an apology for being a jerk the last time you two spoke or maybe it was just his way of saying he was glad you were okay since he hadn’t said anything about it before. Maybe even his way of saying he felt bad you lost someone else you had trusted, that he understood you were betrayed too. In all likelihood, it was all three,

“Love you, Frank.” You muttered against him. “Figured I should say it before whatever happens next.”

“Yeah, love you too, Princess.” He answered and stepped back, patting your cheek before stepping away.

There was tension in the air lingering from an argument that just finished between him and Lieberman. You looked at the former NSA agent and he gave you a look that said he wasn’t going to talk about it. Frank was rushing around, collecting gear and throwing it into the back of the van. You had moved to follow him when something on Lieberman’s monitors caught your attention.

“Guys?” You called as you moved closer to the screens. “What happened here?”

Frank was by your side first. “Go back.”

Lieberman reversed the footage and found a quick scene of two alleged cops taking Sarah and Zach. But you noticed Leo was nowhere to be seen. Lieberman and Frank were going back and forth about what to do, who would be coming, and whether Sarah would give up ‘Pete’. You were more worried about why Leo wasn’t in any of the footage.

You pushed past the bickering men and ran out to your car. You rummaged through the backseat and under your passenger seat, throwing everything out of your way until you found it. The cracked, blood-stained mask. You didn’t care if anyone saw you with it as you ran back into the compound and then began rummaging through Lieberman’s cluttered desktop. You examined different cables and adapters before finding one that matched close enough to the shape of port your mask had.

You were moving to plug both ends in, one to your mask and one to a computer, when you saw a new angle of footage. It showed the driveway and Leo jumping from one of the windows.

“Atta girl.” You said to yourself with a small smile before resuming your task, ignoring Lieberman trying to get you to stop.

“Call her.” You said, simply stating his hands away when he reached for yours.

You were furiously typing, overriding your own security protocols and verifying the use of the new device. You scrolled through the various connections and tracking devices until you found it. It was old, probably had terrible range and reception, but it was usable. With Lieberman’s interconnected network, it just might do it.

SUIT - Y/L/N

The emblem you gave Leo was one of the original trackers before they were embedded in your bodies.

You laughed in slight relief when the screen showed a mask with a small blip of the familiar hourglass shape. You were piecing together where exactly she went when Frank put the call on speaker and leaned over your shoulder to see what you were doing. You pointed to the blinking logo and looked back at him, knowing both hope and worry were reflecting in your eyes.

“Hello?” Her voice came through, panic evident.

“Hey, kiddo.” You said softly. “It’s me and Pete. We’re gonna help you but you can’t talk to anyone about it, okay? Not the cops, not anyone. You remember who I told you I was? I’m gonna handle this.”

“They took Mom and Zach.” She sniffled and your heart broke for her. “I don’t know what to do.”

“I know what they did.” Frank answered. “You have no reason to trust me but I’m right here and we’re the only hope you and your family have.”

“After this call, I need you to take the battery out of the phone.” You instructed calmly. “Throw it as far as you can. Then the SIM card, you do the same thing in the other direction. If those people try to find you, they’re gonna come up empty, okay?”

“You know where the pool in that park is, sweetheart?” Frank said after a whispered exchange between him and Lieberman. “I want you to go there, okay? You wait for us and we will come for you. Okay?”

“Okay… Okay.” 

The call ended after that and you turned to Lieberman.

“You need to go to her.” You said pointedly, pushing past him.

“You just said you two were going.” He reasoned. “She thinks I’m dead. Am I supposed to just go up to her and say ‘Hey, baby. I’ve been living in a basement for a year. I’m not dead. Come let’s-“

“Goddammit, David!” You shouted in frustration. “Your daughter is scared and on her own!”

“Hey..” Frank said quietly, putting his hand on your shoulder. You took a deep breath and nodded, collecting yourself before talking again.

“Go to your little girl, David.” You said in a calmer tone. “I’ve been where she is and when I tell you all I wanted was my dad…”

“Meet us at the Greenpoint Terminal. If we’re not there by midnight, you go to Madani.” Frank instructed.

“Only to Madani.”

“What are you two gonna do?” David asked hesitantly.

“I’ve gotta change.” You shrugged, looking down at your dress shirt. “Then wait for these sons of bitches to show up.”

“Make ‘em tell us where Sarah is. Then we’re gonna kill them all.” Frank finished.

You ran to your car and drove home quickly. You practically ran up the stairs and slammed into the locked closet. You kicked a small box that was left outside your door and figured you’d look at it later. You changed your clothes quickly, the familiar tight fitting material of your suit on your body. Instead of your specialized top from Matt, you wore your newest vest. You fit your Bites into place at your wrists, knives at your thigh and back of your belt, a gun on your hip, shock disks at the front of your belt, retractable at your wrist as well. You threw on a loose pair of sweats and a hoodie for the drive back and sped back to Frank.

You ditched your covers at your car and kept your head down as you went inside. You announced your arrival with a whistle, two quick notes that usually would’ve been answered by a second pair of notes. You arrived just as Frank was finishing his prep, hiding rifles and other gear while you made your way to the bloodied mask. You unplugged it, deleted any trace off David’s computers, and put it over your eyes.

You hauled yourself up into the rafters, tucking your feet to conceal your presence. You and Frank said nothing to each other, only exchanging looks from time to time. It wasn’t until you saw the lights coming from down the hall that you focused up. You tapped your mask and counted the bodies, noting the thermal imaging device your mask detected with one of them. Your presence wouldn’t be secret for long, but it was never intended to be. 

One of the men strayed from the group so you moved carefully from above. You timed your steps to his, careful to shift your weight evenly to avoid any sounds. Once he was completely isolated, you dropped down and landed behind him. You covered his mouth and nose with one hand while flicking out the retractable blade. You dragged the knife along his throat and felt the warm blood spill across your hand.

The familiar metallic smell lingered in the air as his body went limp in your arms. His blood was dripping from your hand and your blade as you tucked it and moved to the next one. A man a few dozen feet away. You clipped the wire between your Bites as you crept up behind him.

In a swift motion, you got the wire around his neck and yanked backwards to throw him to his face and put a knee between his shoulder blades. You pulled the wire tighter and he gasped for breath, clawed at the wire and reached behind to try to grab you. Your hand took hold of either side of his head and twisted, a sick snap echoing in the empty hall.

You met with Frank a few minutes later and made your way into the main room. There was a small team spread out so you and Frank split. You watched one of them begin a phone call so you crept closer and turned your implant to listen in. Your body grew tense when you heard the voice on the other end.

“Конечно.” You muttered in annoyance. (Of course.)

Billy warned that it was a trap but it was too late. A decapitated head came rolling in with an explosive strapped to it and when it went off, you began your next assault. Gunfire rang out on the other side of the room while you took on your targets. The three closest to you.

Panic rose in the trio as you armed your Bites and a threatening red glow emanated from the devices. You quickly fired at one before moving to a second. He raised his rifle but you ducked it and knocked it aside, causing him to fire into one of his teammates’ leg. You grabbed the knife from the back of your belt and dropped to a knee, swiping it along the inside of his knee. He cried out and buckled before you flipped the blade in your hand and drove it down through his foot.

You yanked the other leg out from under him and he fell to his back. You rolled over him and took control of the rifle to fire a quick burst at the first man you had hit with your Bite. You then pressed your device against the second one’s temple and fired, the smell of burnt flesh filling your nostrils quickly. At that point, one target remained.

You grabbed the helmet of the closest body and threw it, slamming the nose of the man limping towards you. You ran at him and took hold of the front of his shirt before flipping over him, pulling him backwards over the desk. You yanked him to the side to get him to face you before slamming your fist against his face. Bloodied punch after bloodied punch until his face was a mangled mess of blood and swollen lumps. At that point, you pulled your pistol and came around to the other side of the table. You held the man by his hair and placed your gun under his chin. He coughed up blood before you fired and he fell limp.

You made your way to Frank again as he was getting hit with heavy fire from three men. You ducked by his side and pulled the discs from your belt. Using the reflection off the blade of your knife, you ricocheted your discs to hit the furthest two. They cried out and doubled over, providing enough of a gap for you to move one way and Frank to go in another.

You went for the two you electrocuted, kicking out at the closest one’s chest to slam him into the wall behind him. You jabbed the heel of your hand into the other one’s throat before he could gather his rifle and he stumbled back, holding the tender flesh. The man behind you grabbed your arm but you quickly breaking free of his hold. You grabbed his forearm instead and forced his arm to extend. You threw your other elbow against the joint and heard the rip tendons. Without releasing his arm, you grabbed his shirtfront and threw him into his teammate.

You pulled a blade and jammed it into the closest one’s stomach, dragging it across until it came out the other side and even more blood spilled over your hands. Using the same knife, you buried it in the last man’s neck. Watching the blood spill from his lips as he choked on it.

You found Frank again in the kitchen, yelling for Russo.

“He’s not here.” You said simply, you accent in your voice as you wiped the blood splatter off your cheek. It wasn’t until then, when the adrenaline was fading out, did you feel the sharp sting on a bullet graze on the outside of your arm.

You heard groaning and turned to see one man crawling away. Or at least trying to. You walked over and pressed a foot against the slices at the back of his legs and he cried out, going limp under your weight.

“Where’s Russo?” Frank asked when he got to your side.

“I… I don’t know, man.” He said through labored, pained breaths.

“The woman. The kid. Where’s they take ‘em?”

“I don’t know, man! That was…” He tried but you shifted your weight to bring a new wave of pain. “That was need to know. I don’t know anything.”

“Fair enough.” Frank said lowly before a quick shot ended the man’s life.

“One of them called Bill when they got here and told him about that.” You stepped off the body and nodded towards the desks that still replayed Zubair’s torture and the countdown. “Check him for the phone.”

Frank patted through the pockets and found it, sitting against one of the pillars before dialing. He put it

on speaker and you sat beside him, rubbing your bloodied hands with a towel.

Sam’s blood.

Elektra’s blood.

“Frank?” Billy said after a short silence.

“The Billy Russo I knew… Oh, he’d have the balls

to come himself, y’know.” Frank said, more to you than Billy.

“The Billy Russo I knew wouldn’t be on the wrong side of this fight.” You added, letting your accent tint your words.

“I’ve got staff for that these days.” He answered calmly. “You know the saying about having a dog and barking yourself?”

“Someday, sometime, this is gonna come down to you and me.”

“What about your little friend? Sounds like she’s pretty involved too.”

“Little friend?” You repeated with a small laugh. “You haven’t figured out who I am yet?”

“You’re a wanted man, Franky Boy.” He chose to ignore you, or at least not admit that you were still a wild card. “They’ll catch up to you eventually, just like last time.”

“Guess we’re both running out of time then, huh, Bill?” Frank answered flatly.

“What’s in those computers, Frank?”

“Woman and the kid. Where are they?”

“They’re with me. Right here. Safe and sound.”

You tapped your mask and gave it a second to find the phone call. It lagged due to the cracked lens but you were able to catch on and begin tracking the call. You needed Billy on the line as long as possible to give your broken mask a chance to do its job.

“It’s everything on you, Billy.” You explained, watching the progress bar fill itself at an agonizingly slow speed. “Listen to me carefully. If anything happens to that family, the whole world will see it. They’ll see you, Bill. After that, you’re done.”

“And Zach and Sarah will be dead.” He countered sharply. “You want that family back? I want Lieberman, and I want you, Frank.”

“Sounds about right… And what about my friend in the mask?”

“The girl?” He paused, thinking it over.

“Not just some girl.” You said plainly, dropping your accent for your next sentence. “I’m surprised you haven’t figured it out, Billy.”

“Y/N…”

“Exodus.” Your accent found you again. You looked to Frank and he gave you a small nod. You sighed to yourself and pushed your mask up. “Set up the exchange.”

“You’re giving up that easy?”

“I’ve got a bigger picture.” You shrugged though it was more trust in whatever plan Frank had. “Last chance.”

“We’ll be in touch.”

You and Frank cleaned yourselves up and headed to meet with David. You called Dinah on the way and gave her the meeting point. You had thrown your sweats and hoodie back on, your mask hanging at your neck under the fabric and Bites hiding under your cuffs.

“How about it, Madani? You gonna pull your weapon on me again?” Frank joked and you smacked his arm.

“Do I have to?” She answered, making you and Frank chuckle.

“Surprised you called her.” David said, nervously looking between you two and Dinah. You looked past him and offered Leo a small wave that she returned.

“You and the princess trust her.” Frank answered and you glared at his use of your nickname. “I guess I do, too.”

“Princess?” She looked at you with a pointed expression.

“Not like that.” You shook your head and began to step away “He says it in a jackass kinda way.”

“No, it’s a ‘she gets everything she wants’ kinda way.”

“Exactly. Jackass.” You laughed.

You went around the van and opened Leo’s door. She was looking at you until Frank had joined you, then her eyes dropped to her lap.

“You did good, kid.” You said honestly. “I’m glad you had it.”

“Had what?” Her brows furrowed and she met your eyes.

“The symbol.” You smiled slightly. “Told you I’d have your back when you got it, didn’t I?”

“You guys knew he was alive this whole time?”

“Sorry about that.” You nodded. “It wasn’t safe.”

“I don’t know what to call you.” She glanced at Frank before dropping her eyes again. “Seems stupid to call you Pete.”

“I’m Frank, Frank Castle.”

“He’s a lot scarier than Pete.”

“Nah, he’s the same.” You offered and nudged Frank with your elbow before leaning closer to Leo to loudly whisper. “Honestly, I like Frank better anyway.”

Next thing you knew, you all went back to Dinah’s office. David and Leo waited in the hall while Dinah interrogated Frank. You hung out in the room, behind the camera. Initially, Dinah was against it but it didn’t take much of your power to change her mind. You knew you didn’t need to be in there but you felt protective of Frank, as both his lawyer and his friend. You simply wanted to make sure Dinah’s questioning didn’t cross a line.

Next was David’s interview, which you also hung around for. He spoke about wanting his family back, about that being his priority.

She tried to convince you to sit in front of the camera but you adamantly denied, saying your word wouldn’t change anything. You were too biased. As Frank’s lawyer and partner, you couldn’t speak on his actions without a conflict of interest. As Billy’s ex, you couldn’t speak on his actions either. As David’s associate, same thing. As Dinah’s freelance partner, nothing you said would be credible. So you erased any confidence in the idea and moved forward, getting ready to meet with Billy for the exchange.

You and the guys arrived just before the meeting time. You had no idea what would happen but you had to trust Frank had a plan, more of a plan than just killing Billy. But just in case, you gave him a hug before you got into position. You ditched your covers again and slid your mask to your face before disappearing into the shadows.

You watched the red van pull up and you pulled your gun from your belt. You felt a rush of relief when Sarah and Zach were revealed unharmed. You gripped your gun tighter when you saw the lit flare and your eyes shot to Frank. He lifted the phone to his ear so you tapped the scar in your hair and listened in, hearing Billy’s voice in your head.

Your mask was already tracing the call so you quietly began to follow the path you were given. You moved carefully, testing out ladders and walkways before putting your full weight onto them. You used the sound of the incoming DHS vehicles to cover your rapid footsteps. You came up behind Billy and grabbed the back of his jacket, pressing the other Bite against his temple.

“Miss me?” You asked, your accent dripping off your words.

“I can still pull the trigger.” He warned before you pressed your device harder.

“On who?” You looked over the scene.

Frank was nowhere to be seen and David was being grabbed. Sarah and Zach were safe behind Dinah but the firefight continued. Moments later, David went down and the scream that left Sarah froze you to your bones. It reminded you of your own scream outside Midland, watching the building go down and take Matt with it.

Billy took advantage of your distraction and as your hand gripped the railing in front of you in an attempt to jump it, he grabbed your arm and yanked to the ground. He pinned an elbow against your back and had your face pressed against one of the poles. You quickly looked down his barrel and saw he was aiming at Dinah.

“Go ahead then.” You spat, struggling under the pressure he was applying. “Kill her, then me. Make your life easier.”

Instead he shot out the front tires of both DHS vehicles and you let out a sigh of relief. You heard the clatter beside you when Billy dropped his rifle and grabbed both of your arms to haul you up with him. You struggled in his grip until he let go of an arm in favor of putting his hand on the side of your head. You had just armed your Bite when he slammed your head down to the railing.

One, two, three times till you fell unconscious.

You woke up on the cold concrete floor. Your head pounded and as you lifted it, you felt the slick feeling of drying blood. Looking over, you were in a small puddle of it. It had soaked into the band of your mask, which miraculously was still in place. Your hands were pinned tightly behind your back with zipties, practically tucked under the Bites still locked around your wrists. Your ankles were secured the same way and as you rolled yourself to your back, you felt nothing at your hip or back.

Your gun and knives were gone.

You managed to sit yourself up and began to glance around, looking for something to break the plastic restraints with.

“…geek friend is no longer with us.” You heard Billy’s voice from across the room.

“You killed him?” Frank asked quietly.

You looked around, craning your neck to see where they were. Across the room, you could only see Billy’s back and the arm of someone in the chair. That had to be Frank. The men continued their back and forth, unaware that you were awake on the other side.

“Did you pull the trigger on my wife?” Frank asked angrily and you felt a surge through your own veins, anticipation for Billy’s answer.

“On my son?”

The ultimate betrayal, more than simply siding with Rawlins. Killing Maria and the kids.

“My baby girl?”

“No.” Billy finally said and you felt some sense of relief. “No, I wasn’t there. If I was, you’d be in the ground because I wouldn’t have missed. But I told them I’d have no part in it.”

Your relief was short lived as you rolled your eyes and scooted down so your fingertips could reach the floor. You began to sweep your hands along, looking for anything. A rock, a loose screw, some debris from the previous fight. As you searched you wondered why Billy would have a part in it now. If he could so easily tell Rawlins and Schoonover no before, why not do it again? Especially when it was just Rawlins.

They continued their conversation as your search came up empty. You realized there was no other option and you closed your eyes and tilted your head against the wall. You clenched your jaw as you wrapped a hand around one of your thumbs. You pulled on the joint, moderating your breathing through your nose until it finally popped. You swallowed the groan as you released the limp digit. You flexed your hand up and got your nails under the edge of the zip tie and began to shimmy it down, over your dislocated thumb. You were silently grateful for your seemingly permanent blood soaked gloves, just as Frank was yelling towards someone else.

Your head snapped up and you tried to see again, but you knew your position was too hidden for him to see. You shrugged it off as your hands were able to separate. You pulled them in front of you and stretched out the ache in your shoulders before you looked at your ankles while popping your thumb back into place with another muffled sound.

You tried to get a finger under but those were done tightly as well. You sighed slightly and looked again, just in case your fingers missed something but you couldn’t miss what was never there. You rested the heels of your hands on your forehead and felt the edge of your mask.

The mask.

You pushed it off your head and turned it over in your hands, looking at the already cracked lens. You didn’t have the means to break it quietly but there was enough chipped off the edge that it was sharp. You tried it on the zip tie around your hand first and with a good tug, you got it to break through. At that point you brought it down to your ankles and began to saw through until it finally popped apart.

You smiled to yourself before you fixed the mask back over your eyes and crept closer to the scene, though you had to ignore the ache in your arms from your escape. Rawlins had come and gone but there was someone typing away at the computer screens, trying to get through to stop the countdown. Your first instinct was to go and help Frank, untie him before drawing Billy away, but the persistent tapping on the keyboards beside you kept plucking the strings of your nerves.

You’d deal with her first.

You crept into the area with the computers and woke one of your Bites. It hummed gently around your wrist while you stayed low to the ground to ensure no one in the next room could see you. You took one steadying breath, calculating the time you’d have between first contact and one of the men coming into the room.

Less than a minute was your best guess.

You kicked out her chair and the wheels scraped aggressively across the floor. She hit the ground with a loud groan so you reached across and covered her mouth with your hand. You aimed the other Bite and fired on her quickly, a sharp yelp coming from her before she fell limp. Small convulsions raked through her body though her eyes were closed. You stayed in your kneeling position and peeked over at the screen, finding comfort in the countdown that was still ticking. Cursor blinking in the box asking for a password

“Who are you protecting, hmm?” Billy asked and you dared to stand fully, relieved to see just him and Frank in the room and neither were looking at you. “Maria? Y/N?”

Your heart jumped at your name, triggering the set of explosions in your chest that you thought would betray you. You watched in quiet interest while Billy wiped some of the blood dripping from Frank’s mouth and nose.

“She’s probably the one person in this city you don’t need to protect.” He chuckled and you saw the faintest of pinks falling from his words. The thought of him loving you, it really made his firm stance against you so confusing, but for all you knew Billy was just as confused.

“Doing all this for Y/N/N isn’t gonna change anything. They’re dead. They’re dead because of you. And I get it. It’s a heavy, heavy burden… Time to put it down.”

“Don’t die on me, Frank.” You said to yourself. “I need a little more time.”

You ignored the words Billy was saying while you went back to the desk, finding the cable you had used when you first connected your mask to find Leo. You tried to move things quietly, given your rummaging was the only sound in the place. After what felt like an eternity, you found it. You pulled your mask around your neck and connected it. You typed carefully, gently pressing the keys to work through the security. When it came to the ocular scan, you were able to use a zoomed image saved in your mask. You had just gotten in when you felt slapped with the despair, the submission, and it left a cold feeling across your skin. You collected whatever would be dispersed when the timer ended and slid them over to be copied to your mask before picking up your head.

“It’s gotta be you.” Frank said and your heart sank immediately. “It’s gotta be clean. Just don’t let him take me, Bill. Don’t let him hurt her.”

“Who?”

“The… The princess. You gotta promise me that.”

How could he be worried about you in a time like that?

“Frank…” You tried to speak but you had no voice. Just a strained whisper of your friend’s name.

No, not your friend.

Your family. Your brother.

You understood then, the reasons you expected Billy to be loyal to Frank were the exact reasons you were, and that’s why it twisted your stomach so tightly. You fought beside Frank by chance, same as Billy. You risked your life at Frank’s side, same as Billy. You stood beside Frank in a storm of blood and bullets, same as Billy. Parched him up, trusted him with your life even when everyone told you not to. But on the other side, you stayed at his side without doubt. Billy left.

“He’s not gonna touch her.” Billy said honestly. “I promise.”

You weren’t exactly sure if you found comfort in that or not. What you did know from that was you had leverage, and you’d need as much of that as you could get.

There was a subtle pinging from your mask so you held it up enough to see that the files were copied. You disconnected the device and fit it back to your face as Billy summoned two men - who you hadn’t noticed and miraculously didn’t notice you either - to bring Frank to the computers.

Billy got into the room first as you were finding a hiding spot. Under the back corner of the desk, behind the leg among the mess of cables underneath. They stepped over the woman’s body and you saw Billy’s steps falter. Your hand hovered at your hip but remembered your gun was gone. You sighed to yourself and rested your hand over your bent knee, forced to depend on your own strength and your Bites. He said nothing and a bit later, the men slammed Frank’s chair down. You watched him draw closer, blocking your hiding spot from view as he spoke. Rawlins had entered as well while Frank was typing.

Soon after, a small alert popped up in the corner of your mask. You carefully tapped your mask and it displayed the live camera feed from David’s systems on the roof above you. You realized quickly that Frank was potentially going to push Rawlins, that way if he died that day, at least it’d be on tape.

That crazy son of a bitch.

The screaming was next, sending a jolt of adrenaline through you. Billy had moved out of your way so you reacted quickly. You kicked out his knees so he fell to the ground and you climbed out of your hiding spot. 

You moved to stand but Billy grabbed your ankle, causing you to stumble and give him enough time to get up. You spun quickly when his grip released, a small growl at the base of your throat as you faced him. He looked at you with slightly widened eyes before you moved at him. You threw sharp combos of punches, alternating hands and targets, switching your feet and ducking his attempts to hit you back. On one swing, he pushed your hand away but the movement was enough to flick out the knife at your wrist. You chuckled in disbelief, having completely forgotten about the discreet weapon, before yanking your arm back and slicing the tip of Billy’s shoulder.

You shoved your shoulder into his chest to knock him back before you hurried to kneel at Frank’s side. He looked at you in complete shock and you ignored the look while you wiggled the tip of the blade under the ziptie. Before you could break it, a heavy boot slammed your side. It knocked the air from your lungs as you fell to the ground. Looking back and clutching your side, Rawlins stood over you with blood dripping down his chest and neck. He was breathing heavily before he slammed his foot into the side of Frank’s head and your friend went limp.

He came closer to you and you saw Billy coming up behind him. You quickly decided you didn’t need or want that man to save you so you helped yourself. You waited until Rawlins was within your reach and you swiped your blade in a wide arc and sliced both of his legs. You then kicked out at the new wounds and the man fell into Billy. You ran after that, just far enough away that you could get into the rafters, though neither man had the audacity to chase you.

You waited a few minutes and just as you were going to sneak back in, your implant was pinging with a phone call. You denied it but it came again. With a silent groan, you climbed down and snuck out the back entrance you usually crept in through.

“What?” You said sharply.

“What did you do to my cameras?” David asked quickly on the other end.

“Your cameras?”

“I’m trying to access them but it says they can’t broadcast. You said you messed with them. What did you do?”

“What are you…” You began before you remembered. “Right, shit. When I first got here and I didn’t know or trust you, I blocked any and all broadcast. Only connected devices can get to the feed.”

“Well unblock it!”

“I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t?” Dinah asked, her voice further away than David’s.

“I don’t have that tech with me.” You said honestly. “I might be able to do it through my mask but there’s no guarantee… What do you need the cameras for anyway?”

“These men need to be arrested!” She urged. “We need to see what’s happening.”

“There are no arrests to be made here!” You argued. “Madani, I worked with you because I needed to know what you knew. But this talk of- of trials and arrests, you sound like Daredevil and look where that got him. It ends the way Frank decides it ends…. Жизнь за жизнь.” (A life for a life.)

“Can I undo it from here?” He asked instead.

“Maybe.” You shrugged, not caring to argue. “Can you read Russian?”

“What?”

“It’s a Russian program. If you can read it, the override key is Daredevil, Отчаянный. And the confirmation is Romanoff, Романофф.”

“Why would you do it in Russian?”

“It’s my first language, dude. Look, I gotta go.” You hung up quickly.

You took a deep breath of fresh air and looked back at the door.

You could leave. You didn’t have to stay, didn’t have to fight. You could go home, lick your wounds and take on Billy on your own if Frank didn’t finish it.

But what kind of friend would that make you? What kind of person would that make you?

You’ve gotta see it through, sweetheart.

You could hear Matt’s voice in your head.

You’ll be alright. Save Frank to save yourself.

You weren’t even worried about yourself.

So you went back inside. You snuck in quietly and stayed low, hiding in shadows and behind the clutter David left behind. You watched the scene unfold with a sick feeling in your stomach, enough to make you want to puke. But you swallowed it down, forced it to the bottom of the chasm in your chest.

Every punch Rawlins landed on Frank was paired with an echoing explosion. You were still there, in front of Midland as it went down. And the Matt in your head might’ve been right. To get yourself out of there, to save yourself, you had to save Frank.

“I made him a promise.” You recognized Billy’s voice as you got into the room, shimmying behind some pile

of crates.

“I don’t care about your promise.” Rawlins spat and the anger was hot, even in your hiding spot. “Why don’t you make yourself useful and go find the girl?”

“The girl?” Billy nearly laughed. “You do realize that was Exodus, right? She wiped the Russian syndicate off the map by herself. She cleared Yakuza from the city. Took on Wilson Fisk. She don’t wanna be found, no one’s gonna find her.”

“Oh… I see.” Rawlins nodded and you clicked your mask to watch from the camera. “You’ve gone soft for her.” He mocked. “You think she cares about you, Russo? If she’s so dangerous, then you're only alive to serve her purpose. Once she’s done, she’ll put a bullet in you unless you get to her first.”

“She’s not gonna kill me.” Billy shrugged and your brow quirked at the confidence. “And I’m not gonna kill her. But I am gonna kill him.”

“He does not get to die easy!” Rawlins yelled.

“He’s taken too much from me.”

“Like what?” Billy challenged and in any other scenario, you would’ve thought it to be sort of hot.

You stopped paying attention after that, wondering how you were going to get the men out of the room. You considered going after their hacker again, but you’d already shocked the girl once. Doing it again might just kill her. You could head back into the rafters, call them and lure them away. Throw something down the hall and watch them panic, but that might only get one. You were calculating different options when Frank’s agonizing scream sounded and you nearly exposed yourself.

“This doesn’t serve me!” Billy yelled and you saw two sets of feet moving away. Looking at the small camera image at the corner of your vision, Billy had pulled Rawlins off.

Rawlins calling Billy a gutter rat seemed to strike a chord with you that you didn’t understand, nor did you try to. You stepped out carefully, gently guiding the blade out of its position hidden under your Bite, and crept behind Rawlins. Billy’s eyes darted over and saw you coming but instead of saying anything, he moved to be behind Frank and put his gun to his head.

You reacted quickly in turn, putting an arm around Rawlins’ neck and kicking out his knees to force him to the ground. You pulled back the arm around his throat and pressed the tip of the blade under the man’s chin.

“Nice to know you’ve got good things left to say, Bill” You said simply, your familiar accent rolling off your tongue with ease. “But if you hurt him, I will kill you.”

“Stand down, Lieutenant!” Rawlins shouted, a strained sound.

You heard a faint click, not one of the handgun Billy held but something else. Like plastic breaking. After a second, Billy stood and held his gun up in surrender.

“And you.” You said to Rawlins, pushing the tip enough to break skin. “Beating on a man who cannot fight back. That’s low, even for me. Is it because you’re afraid?”

“I’ll kill you.” He breathed. “After Castle, you’re dead.”

You looked up and saw Billy moving closer, a hand out to you in question. You clenched your jaw and yanked your blade, cutting a long line across the bottom of his chin before you threw him to his face. You reached down and took the gun from his holster, tucking it into yours instead.

“No, I don’t think I am.” You answered. “I took out Russians and Yakuza, remember?”

You let Billy grab both of your arms and put them behind your back. Rawlins had gotten to his feet and reached for something off the table, a blue rod in either hand. You tried to see it better but he shoved the object against your stomach, between the armored plates and you felt a needle pierce your skin.

You gasped in shock and Billy pulled you backwards as Rawlins turned to Frank and laughed. You sudden felt a tingling sensation across your body, as if all of your limbs had fallen asleep and were waking back up. You could feel your heart steadily picking up in your chest, a strange stutter in its rhythm. It made you dizzy, uneasy on your feet and falling into Billy. You watched him stick Frank with the other and he sat upright in his chair.

“Adrenaline…” You muttered, shaking your head to clear the symptoms. You could feel them fading, the heat under your skin burning through the excess hormone, but that didn’t make the physical effects any less.

“Frank…” You tried but got no reaction, not even when Rawlins leaned in with what looked like an ice pick in his hand.

“Frank!” You yelled, using every square inch of air in your lungs as Billy dragged you towards the computers.

You watched as Frank got his revenge, beating on Rawlins before shoving his thumbs into the man’s eye sockets. It was a grotesque scene but well warranted, all things considered.

You fought out of Billy’s hold and stumbled down the short stairs, making your way to Frank’s side. The two exchanged comments as you fell to your hands and knees beside your friend. You were reaching for the gauze at your belt when you heard the Homeland announcement. Your intent shifted to the borrowed gun and you lifted it as Billy aimed his gun at Frank.

You fired without hesitation and grazed his hand. You didn’t pay attention to where he went. Instead you dropped the gun and focused on Frank. David was quick to get to the ground beside you and Dinah stood a few feet away in quiet shock.

“Dammit, Dinah.” You said sharply. “Help me. Help him!” You began shouting. “He did all of this for your goddamn justice and all you can do is stand there!”

“Put your hands up!” An agent yelled but you ignored him, staring daggers at Dinah while you were holding Frank’s hand. You knew you were projecting your desperation, the need for him to survive, but you didn’t know how it came across to him.

“Hands up, now!” He yelled again and you felt the rifle at the base of your skull.

“Jesus Christ, Madani, do something!” David shouted.

“Если нет, ваши люди снова умрут.” You warned lowly. (If not, your men will die, again.)

[petertingle-yipyip]

MAD AT GOD - MATT MURDOCK

Season Three - Aimed To Kill

tags: @mayasaurus--rex @americaarse @dusstory @johnmurphys-sass @ironprincessstranger @astrobees @woowwwee // four // six // masterlist

Pairing: Matt x Reader

Word Count: 10,424

Summary: Pages turn and bridges burn as Ex realizes the extent that she’s behind. When sentiment thrives amongst the chaos between her and her first love, question becomes whether they can fix their hearts with the lips that have left scars on each other.

Ray sent you home after your conversation. A team remained for cleanup and analysis, and you offered to help, but you were told to go home. He said for you to take care of yourself, write down whatever important things you didn’t want to forget, and he’d see you in the office for a debrief tomorrow. You tried to wait for Karen or Foggy, but Ray said if you wouldn’t leave on your own, he would walk to your car himself.

You thought about going home, about sleeping off the whole ordeal. But your mindless driving took you to the church. Once you pulled up, your feet guided you through the rod-iron gate out front without hesitation and through the heavy wood doors with your chest growingly inexplicably tighter with each step.

Your feet seemed to know where to go more than your head because before you knew it, you were just around the corner from the gate. You took a deep breath and built the pressure in your chest to a pinnacle. You let it out as a controlled exhale and felt the thrumming of your pulse slow to its usual pace.

“You’re missing the point! He didn’t just find someone to wear my suit.” Matt argued so you stayed around the corner to listen in, hiding your presence behind a bubble of indifference. “He’s as fast and skilled as I’ve ever seen, and I couldn’t take him. He found someone to kill me.”

“Matthew.” Sister Maggie tried.

“I was stupid enough to think that I had Fisk cornered. He knew I’d find the witness and I just brought the sheep to the slaughter.”

You shook your head slightly, feeling that slap of guilt.

“Jasper Evans is dead. He’s dead and he leaves a son behind and that’s on me! … I was so sure that I was finally out in front of this bastard. God, and I was stupid enough to put Y/N in the middle of it.”

You stepped inside quietly and stood beside Maggie. Her head snapped towards your sudden presence, but she offered a small, thankful smile. You gently took the cloth from her hand and moved towards Matt. He jerked away from your touch but you grabbed his sleeve and pulled him back. He huffed in annoyance and you quietly rolled your eyes.

“Fisk knew I thought that I had him. He was waiting for me.” Matt’s rant continued, though his anger was now wavering between that heat - a heat that so familiarly blasted from him - and suffocating guilt. “Of course he was waiting for me.”

You worked calmly and quietly as you began undoing the buttons of his shirt. 

“Foggy and Karen could’ve been killed.” Matt tried.

Your movements paused at the last button when you realized he was right. But your head cocked in thought when you also realized that they weren’t killed. He hardly touched them… Why kill everyone else but them? “And there would’ve been nothing I could’ve done to stop it. Nothing.”

“You’re losing blood. Let me stitch you up!” Maggie insisted and Matt’s brows furrowed slightly, clearly having assumed the person touching him was the familiar nun.

“I listened to you. I listened to you and they almost died.” Matt continued, though one bloodied hand reached forward and found your face.

You couldn’t hide the smile as his thumb traced your features. He closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh, his mouth threatening to reveal a smile. That prior tightness in your chest dissipated almost instantly when you saw that you still meant something special to him. While their conversation continued, you were thinking of an old memory from college.

————————————

“Does that even work?” You giggled and dropped on the bed beside Matt. He turned his head in your direction with a content smile. “They do it on TV but is it actually a thing?”

“It helps, yeah.” He nodded. “You don’t have to though.”

“Do you want to?”

He gave a small shrug. “Foggy’s pretty much told me what you look like. The guy couldn’t stop talking about you for a week after we first met. It was always ‘how did we not know she was in our classes?’ and ‘how is a girl like that trynna be a lawyer?’.”

“Huh.” You propped yourself up on your elbows. “I’m gonna kick Franklin’s ass.” You laughed before sitting up fully and patting Matt’s chest. “C’mon, get up.”

“Why?” He asked, though he did as he was told.

“So we can do this.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

You could tell he was trying to keep down his smile as his hand hovered near your cheek. You felt a twisting in your stomach and realized for the first time in a long time, you had butterflies. Your skin was buzzing with excitement as you waited for Matt’s gentle touch. He giggled quietly and pulled his hands away.

“What’s wrong?” You laughed.

“Nothing.” He insisted with a grin. “Nothing, I swear.”

Your brows raised expectantly and he licked his lips with a smile as he raised his hands again. You laughed to yourself and grabbed his wrists to guide his hands. You slid his fingers into your hair at your temples and his thumbs ran along your forehead, following the path of your hairline.

You watched his expression shift, though there was always a smile on his face. His brows raised and furrowed as his thumbs continued to travel your face, skimming over your eyebrows as his fingers traced the curve of your ears. You giggled slightly when he got your eyes and the touch against your lashes made your eyes close.

“Can you smile?” He asked softly when both palms slid to your cheeks.

Your eyes opened and you saw the soft expression he wore. That look alone was enough to bring out an honest smile, thinking about how sweet and honest Matt was. He gave you a chance to be soft in a way you never had before. You had always thought yourself synonymous with bloody knuckles and gun powder. You wanted to be something to fear, to make people afraid to hurt you. But when Matt was around, all your jagged edges seemed to be rounded out.

His thumbs traced your cheeks to the bridge of your nose. You bit down the smile as his pointer fingers made their way to your lips, gingerly tracing the shape. One hand fell away while the other gave your cheeks a gentle squeeze, making you laugh.

“What was that for?” You asked and he laughed with you as he pulled both hands back to his lap.

“Nothing.” He answered innocently. “You’re beautiful, Y/N.”

“Thanks, Matt.. So are you.”

“Yeah?” His brows raised as a slight pink tinted his cheeks.

“Yeah…” You smiled softly. “Y’know, I’m really glad we met.”

“Me too.”

————————————

Maggie tapped your shoulder and you pulled back into the present moment. You turned to see her handing you a bowl with the supplies to stitch him up. She offered a quick nod before disappearing and you blinked the pink tint from your vision.

“I don’t know if I can beat the man he sent to kill me, Y/N/N.” Matt confessed softly as you moved across the room to wash your hands.

“Have you forgotten everything I taught you?” You asked simply.

“I’ve thought about everything between us a lot lately.” He said softly, all anger fading to the back for a moment as he appeared at your side. “Good and bad.”

“And there’s been a lot of both.”

“Mostly my fault.”

You turned to him with a clean wet cloth in hand. You gently grabbed his jaw and turned his head down towards you. He snorted a quiet chuckle while you gently cleared the blood from his nose and mouth.

“Well I’m not exactly a cake walk to have around… Just ask Marc. Or Billy. Or Frank. Or either of my cousins.. Hell, you could ask Karen.” You laughed slightly.

“I’m serious, Y/N/N.” He offered a small, lopsided smile.

“Y’know, I thought you might've turned off your heart, cause that just wasn’t you last time I saw you, when we were at Jasper’s.. But this guilt makes more sense.”

“You don’t seem very fazed that our friends could’ve died.” He commented as your hands returned to their place in his chest and began stitching him up.

“Yeah...” Your brows furrowed as you thought back to your realization from just moments ago. “They could’ve. But they didn’t.”

“He knew from the start, since I went to the prison. He knew I’d find Jasper.”

“Shut up for a second.” You shook your head, pausing your hands to let your brain work through your thoughts. You slowly began tapping your finger against his chest and he looked down at you with raised brows. “So why didn’t he kill them?”

“What?”

“The imposter could've killed them both. You were down and I had barely gotten to my feet, which was after he had already pulled a trigger on Jasper.” You stopped and turned your head up to face Matt again. “He doesn't seem like the kind of guy to give chances. So why not kill them too? Why not kill all of us?”

“Cause that wasn’t the plan.” Matt finished.

“No… He wasn’t sent to clear the place. The journalists and whatever damage he did from that was his own idea, probably only killing people that fought back. He was sent to send a message. To me and you, to the public, and every crime syndicate in New York. If he can wreck your public image, it shows that the people can’t trust you anymore. And by making it look like you’ve snapped and you work for him now, criminal groups across the city will see him as untouchable.”

“FBI protects him inside. Daredevil protects him outside. Makes it look like not even Exodus can’t touch him.”

“Untouchable. Like she’s fighting a losing battle…” Your fingers continued the steady movements to stitch him up. “We’ve gotta find this guy sooner rather than later.”

“I couldn’t stop him, but you could.” His brows furrowed but you ignored the look he gave you and focused on finishing the stitches. “How’d you know how to beat him?”

“His first instinct was to throw the club, which told me pretty much everything I needed to know.” You explained, though it was partially a lie. “He was strong, sure. But it was easy to tell his advantage was with distance and projectiles. When you two were going at it, he had trouble blocking everything which showed a lack in hand to hand experience. I saw a fighter that relied on brute strength or distance. The way he carried himself reminded me of the military, and in my experience, military men can’t defend against me very well. He couldn’t get me until I let up or got distracted.”

“Your experience.” He chuckled. “How many military men do you have experience with?”

“I don’t owe you that answer.” You said simply.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that’s not a very discreet way to ask who I’ve been sleeping with.”

“What?” He feigned innocence.

“I know you were at the apartment. What gave it away?”

“I could smell the colognes in the bedroom.” He admitted.

You let the silence settle for a moment until he began fiddling with his fingers.

“Four.” You finally answered and his brows raised in mild shock. “Two of them would’ve been recent enough that you could tell but they were just to pass the time. Well that’s kind of a lie. I was starting to like one of them until he turned around and shot me. The other two of them actually mattered, but one of them’s like my family. They’ve never been in the bedroom like that.”

“Hmm… Couch?” He tried to joke.

You smacked his arm.

“Neither of them have been in the apartment.” You specified.

“Your math is wrong, by the way. That was five.”

“No, it’s four.. There’s some overlap.”

“Would I uh… Would I know any of them?”

“Names, yes. Actual people, some. And to answer that other burning question that’s stamped on your forehead, no. I never slept with Frank.”

“I didn’t-“

“You assumed the only military guy we had in common… You were dead. What else was I supposed to do?” You gave a small shrug and dropped the supplies to the sink.

“I know.”

“Y’know, I really thought we could make it..”

“We still can.” He said softly, as if the words would break him. As if admitting those words in your presence was the last crumble of his resolve to stay away in the name of your protection.

And maybe they did. All you knew for sure was that whatever hard casing had shattered in your chest earlier that night, it would never fully solidify again. You were each other’s greatest weakness. The clearest vulnerability, but your greatest strength came from each other. Your best feats came when you two were together. Fisk knew that, and that’s why he wanted to separate you two.

Matt waited for you to turn back towards him and when you did, he took your hand and guided you to the small bed tucked in the corner.

“The suit he was wearing...” You remembered, hoping to redirect the conversation to the fight.

“Yeah, it was perfect.” Matt agreed.

“I think we’ll need to see Melvin.” You sighed and turned to him.

His brows furrowed as his head tilted, listening in on something. Your head cocked as you watched and waited for him to talk about it.

“Are your ribs bothering you again?” He asked suddenly. “It sounds like the bones are rubbing together.”

“Probably. He slammed me a few times and I took a tumble down the stairs earlier but it doesn’t hurt.” You sat up taller to prod the area but Matt’s hand was already pressing against the bones while the other was against your back for stability. You winced sharply and grabbed his wrist. “Yeah, they’re busted. I’ll deal with it later.”

“I can’t really feel it. Can I…” He gestured to your shirt.

You shook your head softly but stripped off your jacket and button-up. You gave Matt a side eye as you undid the velcro straps on your vest but he held a look of innocent concern. You pulled the vest over your head with a wince, leaving you in the black compression top that was underneath.

“Don’t think you're gonna get me out my clothes that easy anymore, Murdock.” You teased and he smiled as you guided his hands back.

“Guess I still got it.” He answered lowly as he pressed against your rib cage. You let a sound between a whine and a groan, which made Matt quickly turn to face you. “Never heard you make that sound before.”

“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes in amusement.

“What about your hip? Where the knife went in?” His fingers slid down and pressed the joint of your hip.

“It’s fine, should be just a scar by now.” You looked down at his hand and saw the dark purple shapes on the back of your forearms from where you blocked the baton earlier that night. You hummed in acknowledgment and lifted your arms to better see the bruises.

Matt was quick to reach up and run his fingers along your skin, feeling the slight swelling of the discolored area. He sighed slightly and leaned forward, sliding his hands to have a better grip on your hips. He offered a quiet, pleading expression and gave your body a slight pull. You hesitantly scooted closer, lifting a leg to rest on his lap.

“My last fight was a lot worse. Still got out better than you did.” You said softly, brushing your fingers across his forehead to move his hair back. “You feeling okay?”

“Careful, Y/N.” His eyes closed and a small smile crossed his lips. “I might start to think you still love me.”

“I wouldn’t be down here if I didn’t.” You confessed quietly. “I had to make sure we didn’t lose you again.”

He shifted back on the bed slightly and pulled your hips again, this time pulling you over his lap. He draped your arms over his shoulders before his hands ran up and down the sides of your thighs. You leaned your forehead to rest on his and he tilted his head back so his lips brushed yours.

“You know there are some things we need to talk about.” You said quietly.

“I know..”

“And I can’t stay down here forever.”

“Yeah, just… Just let me hold you for a little longer.”

You nodded slightly and his arms snaked around your waist, allowing you to wrap yours around his shoulders.  You leaned forward to drop your head against his shoulder and his chin rested on top of your head. He took a deep breath and his arm held you a little closer. In turn, you felt a rattling in your chest. The sensation was true for what you and Matt felt about your current relationship. Uncertain, shaky at best with a cracked foundation. But there was a familiar tug as well, like a string tied from his heart to yours.

“I don’t want you to get hurt because of me anymore.” He mumbled against your shoulder before he pulled back. “I can’t keep you with me.”

“I can protect myself.” You answered with a small smile. “And I can feel that you want me here, Matty. You can say whatever you want but you can’t hide that longing in your chest.”

He hesitated to go any further, though his hands held you a bit tighter. You let your own hands run up the back of his neck and your fingers pushed into his hair. He let out a chuckle in relief and pressed his lips fully against yours.

Your lips moved together as if no time had passed. You let out a soft moan when he gently pulled you closer and you let all your guards crumble away.

Suddenly, Matt could feel her pulse against his skin with the small noise she made. He could hear more than just the bones rubbing together in her chest. He heard the way her heart was pounding and her breath was growing shallow. He slid his hands up to the exposed skin of her sides and he loved how he heard her heart pick up and the gasp that fell from her lips. He continued to push his hands under her shirt until his fingers found the hem of her bra.

His head was screaming for him to let her go, to force her to leave and keep her safe. He was yelling at himself to say something hurtful, to break her heart and send her off hating him. He knew she’d be safer that way, as far away from as she could get. But Matt recognized that she wouldn’t go for that. She’d never leave his side if she had a choice, and she wouldn’t let Matt take that choice from her.

She pulled her lips away just enough to offer a small, silent nod. She helped him remove her shirt and to stifle the groan. Once the fabric was gone, Matt gently switched positions so she could lay on her back. He carefully climbed on top of her and felt her hands trail down his chest. His eyes closed as her fingertips ghosted over the various scars across his abdomen, as if she wanted to see if they were still there. Maybe that was how she could convince herself it was real, that he was real. He felt her hands falter on one that she wouldn’t know, one that came from Midland Circle. But he knew she wasn’t feeling it in a bad way. She was feeling it to remember it, to add it to the memory she kept of his body.

He had added a few new scars of hers to his memory as well. The tattoos at the back of her neck. Deep lines around her wrist that were interrupted by a shallow circle on either side, a short but raised mark near her belly button. The newest one at her hip that he had yet to feel. He felt the slight divot along her jaw earlier that night. Whatever she had gone through in his absence, she’d never be able to forget it. He still wondered what happened, but in those moments where he had her hands and lips on him, he couldn't bring himself to stop and ask. He decided it would be a story for another time.

The moment only broke when Y/N gently pushed his chest away.

“Maybe this isn’t a great idea..” You said gently.

“Yeah..” He answered simply, as if that was the reaction he expected from you. “You’re probably right.”

“I still wanna stay.” You offered as he moved to lay beside you.

“I thought you couldn’t.”

“Tell me to go and I will.”

“And if I want you to stay”?

“Tell me and I will.”

You woke later that night - or maybe it was early morning - when your phone was ringing on the floor. You freed yourself from Matt’s arms and slid from the small bed to the floor. You found your phone in your jacket and leaned your back against the bed while you answered.

“Yeah?” You mumbled, eyes still closed and sleep dripping from your voice.

“Hey.” Dex’s voice answered and it felt like you were slapped awake. Every muscle in your body tensed as you expected an accusation of your alter ego. “Just callin’ to see if you’re home. I wanted to come by.”

“Isn’t it kinda late for that?”

“I was just hoping we could talk.. I heard about what happened at the Bulletin.”

“They’re talking about it already?” Your brows furrowed. 

“No, not really.” He said carefully and it was clear he was fabricating his lie as he went. “Ray told me you got a little banged up and I should check on you.”

You knew you had to redirect the conversation quickly or else he might realize that he didn’t see you there, if he hadn’t realized already.

“You don’t have to. I’ve gotten worse than a few bumps and bruises. But hey, while I got you, I wanted to ask if there was any word on your leave? I didn’t get a chance to see if Ray knew anything.”

“Uh… No. No, I haven’t heard anything. No.”

“That’s too bad.” You feigned disappointment. “Tonight probably would’ve been different if you were with me.”

“Yeah…” He paused on the other line and you knew you still had some hooks in him you could pull. “Well, I guess I’ll let you go. Sorry to wake you.”

“Don’t worry about it. Hopefully I get you back with me soon, yeah?”

“Yeah… Yeah, soon. Back with.. with you.”

When you walked into work that morning, you were immediately blasted with familiar feelings from Karen. You followed that calling and ended up in the conference room with Foggy and Karen on one side and Ray on the other. Karen let out a tense sigh and jumped to meet you in a tight embrace, so tight you had to swallow the groan when she squeezed your ribs. Foggy was next, a short embrace followed by a tap on your arm.

“Y/L/N. Glad you’re here. How do you feel?” Ray asked when you stood beside him.

“Little banged up.” You gestured to the still red cut on your forehead. “But I’m not sitting this out. I get you had to pull me from the Murdock investigation but you’re letting me stay on this thing.”

“Yeah.” He gave a small smile. “Wouldn’t do it without you.”

“Great.” You nodded and took a seat beside Ray. “Fill me in.”

“We were addressing that, according to her own paper, Ms. Page has met Daredevil at least twice.” He explained and slid a paper across the table, citing the articles Karen had written.

“That psycho’s not Daredevil.” She countered and shoved the paper back.

“I got a pretty good look at him, too. Could’ve fooled me.” Ray countered, not acknowledging that you had told him something similar the night before.

“Do you think every fat guy with a white beard and red suit is Santa Claus?” Foggy countered and you had to smile.

“If he comes down my chimney and leaves presents under the tree.”

“Devil’s in the details there, Ray.” You added carefully. “That guy would’ve acted like Santa. If he did all of that, this guy didn’t act like Daredevil.”

“Based on how many encounters?” Ray turned to you.

“Couple.” You shrugged.

“He doesn’t kill people, ever. It’s not Daredevil.” Karen insisted. “Did you ever look into Felix Manning? Red Lion Bank?”

“They’re on my to-do list.”

“This is bullshit.”

“Look, Karen, he dropped your name.” You added but you weren’t speaking to her an FBI agent. You were speaking to her as her friend, as her vigilante friend, and she knew that. “He had a chance to kill you, but he didn’t. You were the one person left untouched. I know this seems like bullshit but we need to get these pieces to line up somehow.”

“It won’t.” Foggy cut in. “Not until you two start asking the right questions.”

“And what are those, Mr. Nelson?”

“How about this? Where’s Matt Murdock?” Ray interjected, looking at Foggy and then you.

You simply shrugged.

“Yet another fine example of a question that’s besides the friggin’ point!”

“You were supposed to deliver him to us-“ He gestured between the two of you. “-but there are zero Matt Murdocks in my custody.”

“And zero Jasper Evans left alive.” Karen added. “He killed the one person who had dirt on Fisk, but you knew that already. Is that why you don’t wanna go there?”

“Ms. Page.” You warned.

“What? That nut job did Agent Nadeem a huge favor. Now there’s no one left to tell the world what a fool Fisk is making of the FBI.” Karen continued.

“Did you know Daredevil was-“ Ray began.

“Daredevil imposter.” You cut in, earning a look of disbelief from Ray. “I’ll show you later.”

“Regardless.” He turned back to Karen. “Did you know he was gonna attack the Bulletin? Is that why you brought your gun?”

“Oh, come on.” You groaned as Foggy announced “We’re done here.”

Your friends were quick to leave the room, leaving you and Ray.

“What are you doing? I thought you didn’t get a good look at him.” Ray said lowly, almost angrily.

“No but you know who did, other than Karen?” You reached into your pocket and pulled an old thumb drive. “Outside my door this morning. I already checked it and it’s clean. No malware, no viruses, no tracking. Just a comparison of this Daredevil and the real Daredevil.”

After you left Matt the morning before work, you downloaded the footage from your mask. You found a few shots of Dex in the suit and downloaded those frames as pictures. You found a few old shots of Matt in the suit that matched the same framing and downloaded those as well.

“Do I wanna know who gave this to you?” He asked as he carefully took it.

“I wouldn’t be able to tell you.” You shrugged. “Could be an amateur photographer. I know Jameson at the Bugle is always looking for freelancers. Just give me a chance to explain it all, okay? I’ll be right back.”

You hurried out of the room and found Karen and Foggy not too far across the office.

“Evans wouldn’t have come to Bulletin if I hadn’t threatened his son.” Karen said sadly.

“His son will be alright.” You said honestly as you joined them. “My cousin is gonna get in touch and let him know, give him some money and help him start over. It’s not ideal but he’ll be okay.”

“We need to find Matt and-“ Foggy tried.

“No, I’m gonna head to the hospital.” Karen cut in, her voice weak with regret and guilt.

“Call me if you need anything.” You offered on her way out and she nodded. You sighed softly before facing Foggy again and speaking quietly, pulling him a few steps to the side. “Matt’s okay. I checked on him last night.”

“You know where he is?” His brows furrowed.

“Yeah, I guess I always had a feeling. I took a chance and it worked out.. Anyway, he’s a little worse off than me but he’ll be fine.”

“You guys have anything?”

“Sort of.” Your head tilted back and forth. “I’ve got some ideas and a basic construct, but we’ve gotta go to the guy that made the suit in the first place.”

“Think he’ll talk?”

“Yeah, he’s a good enough guy. Fisk had to have twisted his arm to get him to go along with it.” You nodded. “I’m gonna look into it on my lunch, assuming he doesn’t go rogue and do it without me.”

“I’m glad you two are working together again. What does it mean for you two?.”

“I don’t know yet, but my priority is keeping you three safe. I don’t care what I have to do.”

“Y/N.” He sighed.

“Y/L/N!” Ray called from down the hall. “Back to work. Let’s go.”

You patted Foggy’s arm and headed back into the office, following Ray towards a meeting with the warden. Ray filled you in quickly on the walk that you two were going to figure out how Jasper got out in the first place.

Apparently fake books wasn’t the most obvious solution.

You sat on the edge of the desk while Ray handled most of the conversation.

“How did some just check the wrong box?” You chuckled. “If you can’t give me a legitimate path to investigate, it’s gonna fall on your head. Forging federal documents is a crime and you will be serving time if you don’t give us answers. And something tells me those prisoners would love to spend some time with you.”

He stared at you and Ray and you felt the panic. He knew he was cornered, but he was also a coward. Whatever Fisk held over him, it was worth a jail sentence.

“I want my lawyer.” He said finally.

You two were then sitting in the SAC’s office and running over what had just happened. You were quiet while Ray went over everything. He told her what happened with Karen, what Jasper was supposed to say, what happened with the warden. 

“You believe Evans?” She looked to you.

“Why would he risk his life for a lie?” You shrugged. “And if the warden had nothing to hide, why bother with lawyers?”

“Alright. We gotta kick this up the chain. I’m calling the ADIC.”

“And tell him we don’t know all the facts?” Ray questioned quickly.

“There’s a damn good chance Fisk is manipulating us.”

“I warned you guys this would happen.” You muttered and crossed your arms.

“Shut it.” She pointed firmly to you.

“We need two days. Let us get all the facts.” Ray tried and you had to admit, you admired his determination. “When we can prove Fisk had been playing us, we can bury that son of a bitch together.”

“Leave him to fend for himself against all the people he’s burned.” You agreed. 

She shooed you two away and said that you had forty eight hours. You and Ray went back to his office and were comparing the images from your thumb drive.

You pointed out the height differences. Dex had at least two inches on Matt. You showed the difference in jaw shape. Dex’s was more square compared to Matt’s rounded chin. The facial hair difference was clear. Dex stayed clean shaven while Matt opted for light scruff. Their builds were different too, slightly broader shoulders and a narrower waist on Matt. With the photos in front of him, Ray couldn’t deny that they were two different men.

Throughout the day, you learned that the FBI had raided a workshop where Melvin Potter was working, a man who had helped make suits and protection for Fisk. But that was the same man that made yours, Matt’s and now Dex’s suits. You heard talk of a second man there, but only Melvin was in custody. You felt terrible, knowing that when you went to Melvin on your own for help he was more than willing. Now, there was nothing you could do for him because Matt went without you.

You skipped going with Ray to talk to Fisk that night. You told him you didn’t want to see or hear anything from him. You didn’t feel like dealing with more lies so you just headed home. Ray asked if you wanted to come to a small promotion party, just so you didn’t have to be alone, but you politely declined.

You were just getting to your building when you got a call from Maggie asking if you knew where Matt had gone. You answered honestly, that you had no idea but you’d find him. You opened yourself to his emotions and found him, still on his way to wherever he was going. You hurried across town, stopping a few houses down from here you thought you tracked him to. You stripped off your jacket and button-up, threw on your long-sleeve top, and grabbed the mask and Bites from your glove box before hurrying to the right house.

“I’m Daredevil.. The real one.” Matt said when you got into the room. You hurried across and pulled him back by his shoulders to get him off Ray.

“Are you insane?” You asked quietly.

“You don’t look like-“ Ray began.

“I buried the red suit.” Matt cut in. “The man who attacked the Bulletin, he resurrected it.”

“You do, however, match the description of a guy who’s been tuning up FBI agents. Does Agent Y/N Y/L/N ring a bell?” Your head snapped to Ray as he continued. “Heard she kicked your ass so bad you ran off. Maybe I should call her.”

You smirked slightly and Matt threw a discreet elbow into your arm.

“It was the last thing I wanted, but you people-“ He pointed a finger in Ray’s face. You reached over and pulled his hand down, bending his finger back slightly to earn a groan. “-didn’t leave me any choice. If you’d just wake the hell up instead of playing into Fisk’s hands. He’s using you, and I think you know it.”

“You went after the guy at the Bulletin.” Ray turned to you. “You didn’t hesitate. Didn’t even look at the other agents in that stairwell. Why?”

“Because I know who my partner is.” You put a hand on Matt’s shoulder. “And I know who my enemies are. He would’ve killed you too, Agent Nadeem.”

“Who do you think the real danger is here?” Matt added. “Me or him?”

The conversation paused for a minute while Ray had to redirect his son back upstairs.

“Let’s say I believe the two that just broke into my house.” Ray said tightly. “What do you got?”

“The man who attacked the Bulletin dressed as Daredevil… He’s in the FBI.” Matt answered and you felt your blood rush down to your feet.

“What?” You asked quietly. “How do you know?” Matt looked over at you. “How do you know?”

“I found the man that made the suit. He told me that he didn’t know his name, but he knew he was in the FBI. So tell me, which of your agents has Fisk been especially interested in?”

You zoned out for the rest of the conversation. When you got a chance, you snuck out the door. You were quick to change and get back in your car. Instead of going home and ignoring it, you drove to the church. You headed downstairs and waited on the small bed until Matt got there.

“You already knew, didn’t you?” Matt challenged as he stepped inside, tossing his mask across the room while he went to wash his hands.

“You were supposed to wait for me.” You countered.

“Who is he?”

“Why would you think I know?” You stood.

“Who is he, Y/N?”

“I don’t know.”

“You’re lying.” He turned to face you.

“Am I?” You tilted your head with a slight squint. “Or is it that you can’t tell so you’re trying to trap me?”

“Why are you protecting him?” He shouted and your jaw clenched. The worst part was that you didn’t know how to answer that.

You didn’t know if you were or if it was to protect Matt. If you took down Fisk, Dex would go down too. Start at the top and the bottom crumbles. Matt couldn’t face Dex on his own. He’d already proven that. He needed your help, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

“I’m trying to protect you but you won’t listen to me!”

“Listen to you? Listen to you? Y/N, you’ve been lying to me! Why should I listen?”

“Cause you already know you can’t beat him without me.” You said simply, trying to gain some composure. “Whether or not you know his name, he will beat you every time. Next time, he will probably kill you.”

“Why didn’t you stop it?”

“How was I supposed to do that?” You scoffed. 

“You know how. It gets you everything you want, doesn’t it?”

“What, this?” You raised your brows and pulled fear to Matt’s surface, watching him cough and choke slightly before clearing it away. “I can’t control everyone.”

“That’s how you knew how to beat him.” He continued and you didn’t bother arguing. “Because you know exactly who he is.”

“I have an idea.” You said carefully.

“Don’t bullshit me, Y/N. You know.”

You didn’t know why you were protecting Dex, but you couldn’t bring yourself to throw his name out there. Maybe it was your own pride. You wanted to take him down yourself. Maybe it was just some loyalty to him as a partner or some pathetic hope that some sliver of a redeemable man was left.

“I don’t have any proof.” You said, which wasn’t a lie. But you did know how to get it.

“Y’know, I knew you were a good liar, but I didn’t think you’d lie to me.”

“Are you seriously talking to me about lying?” You laughed in disbelief. “You lied for how long about being dead?”

“That’s not the same!”

“No, you’re right. It’s worse!”

“My lie didn’t kill anyone!”

“It almost killed me.” You admitted. His brows furrowed as he faced you, trying to figure out what you meant. “The night after Midland, I thought about drowning myself in the tub. Almost did it, too. And the scar on my wrist that you were so interested in last night? Gunshot, nearly bled out from it. I almost died at the carousel because I didn’t care what happened to me.”

“I didn’t make you do that.” He said quietly.

“You didn't make me… You’re right. You didn’t. But you weren’t here to stop me either. And that was your choice. You always knew where to find me, Matt. But you hid out down here.”

“I’m not the one that can make people feel what she wants. You could’ve stopped them from trying to kill you. You could’ve stopped all of this!”

“You aren’t listening to me! You never listen to me!” You shouted and pushed him by his chest. “I only let my powers go so far, because if I don’t, then nothing‘s real.”

“How far did they go with me?” He asked suddenly, and the question seemed to shock him as much as it did you.

Matt realized it immediately after he said it. That was what he was looking for the night before. When he was thinking of what to say that’d be hurtful enough to break her, to push her away for good. It was the idea of challenging the validity of the relationship they had. He let out a small sigh when he realized that what he said had done more than hurt her. It shattered whatever was left of her heart, whatever had just been putting itself back together.

“What?” You asked softly.

“Was it ever real? My feelings for you.” He didn’t know why he kept going, but he did.

“Did you love me when I wasn’t around?” Your eyes fell to the floor as you backed away, a sharp pain stemming from your chest. “Did you still care about me before I came back?”

“Yeah…”

You swallowed the stinging sensation that was climbing your throat and lifted your eyes to Matt, taking careful steps forward. “Did you ever question it before you knew what I could do?”

He shook his head.

“There’s your answer… The worst part of my powers is not really knowing if I’m messing with someone or if it’s real. But I guess I know what it is with you. And I really wanted everything with us to be real. I was as honest as I knew how to be when it came to you, but you still can’t trust me.”

“Y/N, wait.” Matt realized he couldn’t go through with it. He couldn’t let her leave with that kind of hurt, not when it was his fault.

“No. No, you don’t get to try and pull a punch you’ve already thrown. You can’t backtrack this time..” You shook your head and turned to leave. 

“I didn’t mean it, Y/N, please.”

“You always say what you mean, Matt. After everything I’ve done, I thought you would’ve trusted me by now. But y’know what, fine. You wanna be alone? Be alone.”

You turned on your heels and were storming towards the stairs to leave when you felt his hand on your wrist. You reached over with your free hand and twisted his arm over as you stepped underneath and behind him. You kicked out his front knee and forced him down, quickly moving one hand to press at the base of his shoulder. You pulled your knee back and as you drove it forward, his other hand came up to block it. You pulled your foot back again but threw it for a kick this time, only to have Matt catch it by your ankle.

He yanked your forward and you went stumbling, releasing his arm so your hands could catch yourself on the nearest marble statue.

“Would you just listen to me?” He tried as he got to his feet.

“Like you’ve been listening to me?” You laughed. “Like you listened when I begged you not to stay under Midland?”

“How many times do I have to apologize for that?” He asked loudly, throwing his hands to the side.

“I don’t want your apology. I want you to admit you were wrong.”

“I did what I thought would be better for you.”

You let out a loud sound of frustration and moved at him. You threw a roundhouse that he leaned away from but your momentum carried you around so you spun and shot a back kick that landed against his chest. As he stumbled, you did a quick shuffle to replace your feet and reset yourself to face him. Left jab that he knocked away. Right hook that he ducked. A small growl sounded from deep in your throat as you walked in a small circle around him. He kept his hands up in anticipation as he spun with you, trying to keep you in front of him.

“You think all of this is easy for me?” You asked plainly, feeling every inch of your skin burning with your newly soaked anger. “Easy having you alive. Easy having to go against someone I work with, someone who helped save my life. Karen and Foggy and Lantom and Maggie, all of them wanted me to build bonds and create relationships with people so I wasn’t alone anymore. Well, look where it got me!”

“This is why I stayed away, Y/N.” He tried.

“Bullshit.” You scoffed. “You were being selfish.”

“I knew you had a good life. I knew I would only mess it up.”

“You didn’t mess up my life by coming back. You messed it up when you left, when you betrayed me.”

His hands faltered and you used it to your advantage. You moved quickly and slammed a knee against his chest. It forced him back and he grabbed both of your upper arms to keep you close.

“I couldn’t have betrayed you.” He spoke with a gentle firmness, an honest plea for you to believe him. “I never meant to-“

“What we do isn’t an accident! You don’t accidentally stay under a falling building for your ex-girlfriend. You don’t accidentally stay away from your actual girlfriend for months. You don’t accidentally tell someone that you never really trusted them!”

“You think I ever wanted to hurt you?” He countered. “After knowing where you came from, what you were supposed to be and what your mission was, I thought it was only a matter of time before you hurt me.”

“You think I never sat there and wondered if you were pretending? I never thought I was worth anything more than a bullet.”

“I’ve cared about you since we met, Y/N. You were always worth that.”

“I wasn’t!” You placed the other foot against the wall and kicked off , turning you two so you could slam him to the ground. “I loved you!”

“And I still love you! It was real. I know it was. I know it because you brought something to my life that I can’t stand the thought of losing.”

“Then why would you ask if it was real?” You asked softly, heart twisting in your chest.

“I don’t know.” He admitted with a sigh.

“Liar!” You shouted and slammed a fist down.

He moved his head so your fist hit the ground and the impact jolted up your arm. You threw the punch again and again, hitting the same spot in the concrete until Matt rolled you two up to a sitting position. He put his hands on either side of your face in an effort to force your attention to him. He made a small noise of discomfort when his palms met your skin, likely due to the heat still radiating off you.

One hand was shaking, knuckles bruised and bloody from assaulting the hard ground, while the other gingerly held your injury. Reluctantly, your eyes met Matt’s and even though it seemed like he was looking through you, you knew he was focused on you.

“I was convinced…” He began softly and the gentle tone made the heat slowly dissipate. “I thought that I had to hurt you so you would leave. But I… I couldn’t do it, Y/N. I just couldn’t.”

“But you did.” You answered, your voice small and distant. You leaned away and got to your feet, ignoring the disappointment that you could feel coming from him.

Without another word, you left him on the floor.

The next day went about as expected. Ray was looking into a few agents, but he wouldn’t tell you much. You watched from the media room as he flipped through files before pulling the camera log from the wall behind him. You knew he had to have found the time when Dex had turned the cameras off, likely finding a time when you went in after him. You waited until Ray hurried out of the room before you followed. You claimed you were feeling dizzy from the head injury you had gotten at the Bulletin incident so no one tried to stop you. Instead, you grabbed your duffle from the trunk and took off.

You changed your work shirt for your vigilante top in the closest alleyway after following Ray’s car, waiting to watch him for a minute while you fitted your mask into place. He stood in the alley by himself for a minute, but you and Matt joined him at the same time.

“What’s his name?” Matt asked simply, turning his head towards your presence but saying nothing.

“I need to be sure about you two. You guys have a history of hurting people.” Ray said firmly, looking between you both.

“I want Fisk in prison.” You said honestly. “I don’t want to kill your agent, but if he insists on being in my way, I will go through him.”

“I’m not handing you a federal agent if you’re gonna kill him.”

“I’ll get to him whether you give him to me or not.” You stepped closer to Ray but Matt grabbed your wrist. You turned to face him as your skin grew warm. “Get your hand off me.”

“What happened to partners?” Matt asked quietly.

“That would mean you trust me.”

“C’mon, Ex. If this is about last night-”

“If you’re right about him, taking Fisk down is our job.” Ray cut in.

“Oh really?” Matt said flatly so you yanked your arm back. “Because we all know where he’s sleeping these days. But I understand.. If there’s one thing we agree on, Nadeem, it’s the greater good. Like house incarceration in exchange for good intel.”

“Not everyone will like the choices we make.” You added, keeping your voice level. “But it’s up to us to make those choices.”

Matt turned to you. “Sometimes you have to hurt one person to save them, and others.”

“Oh please.” You scoffed. “Just tell us the name, Agent.”

“I need your word that you won’t touch him.” Ray tried and you felt bad.

Dex was someone that Ray had trusted, someone Ray had worked with for a long time. Dex knew Ray’s family and they were friends. They were supposed to look out for each other. But now they found themselves on opposite sides of the law with vigilantes going after them. You wished there was a better way but you had to get Dex away from Fisk, otherwise you’d never lock the bastard back up.

“Our word can’t mean anything to you.” Matt reasoned.

“But I need to hear you give it.” Ray insisted. 

“I need him to testify against Fisk, so you got it.” Matt said simply. “Her, too.”

“You don’t speak for me.” You countered. “But you won’t convince him to switch sides. Fisk has played too many games with him. One more switch and he snaps.”

“You know who he is?” Ray asked you and you gave a small shrug.

“It’s not hard to connect dots if you pay attention.”

“We’ll slip into his place, look for any evidence that ties him to the attack on the Bulletin and to Fisk.” Ray offered, clearly looking for a way to save Dex. “If we find any, we leave it where it is.”

“You can get around a search warrant if we set off the fire alarm.”

“Exactly. But if we don't find anything, the guy goes on with his life.”

“Spit it out.” Matt said plainly. “Who is he?”

You wondered if this attitude was due to your most recent conversation or if that was just who he was, and the softer night you two had was just a lapse in judgment. His accusations from the night before made you wonder if, subconsciously, you had manipulated Matt into that tender moment. Maybe the man you met in college truly was gone.

Maybe only the Devil remained.

“Special Agent Ben Poindexter.” Ray said tightly and you let out a small sigh.

Matt turned towards you and you knew there was accusation in his expression. He had to have remembered the name from when you talked about Dex before Midland Circle, when you were at Anvil and waiting to hear from the FBI. It had to have clicked in his head why you hid his identity. 

Dex was your partner, your friend. He was there for you while Matt was gone. He wanted to fault you for it, and while he didn’t appreciate you hiding that from him, he wasn’t going to bring it up then.

Later that night, you were waiting for Matt on Dex’s fire escape.

You slid open the window when he got there and he moved to let Ray in the front door. You let them wander the apartment while you moved towards the safe in the closet. If he was keeping the suit in his place, that’s where it’d be.

“I can’t call a crew to crack that.” Ray sighed.

Matt moved forward and got to work on it.

“I know the combination. You don’t have to-” You spoke loudly, but Matt ignored you. “And you’re doing it anyway, Great.”

“Wait, he can do that?” Ray asked with wide eyes.

“Not if you two keep talking.” He answered tightly.

You mocked him quietly and tapped your mask. You let it load up before leaning closer to the safe. Your eyes searched each shelf but found nothing out of the ordinary.

“It’s not there.” You said quietly as Matt got the door unlocked.

The boys looked through the safe and found nothing they could use. You were turning to leave when you heard the click of a tape player. Turning back, you saw Matt with Dex’s cassette player in hand as one of his old therapy tapes played.

You sighed slightly and felt a sudden spike of panic.

“What did you leave Poindexter doing?” You asked Ray when you realized it was coming from the direction of the bureau. Your implant pinged in your head and you had a feeling it was Dex. But you couldn’t answer it in front of Ray, so you had to leave it alone.

“Talking to an attorney about a wrongful termination suit. Why?” Ray answered as Matt went through more tapes.

“Because something is going very wrong. He’s about to break.”

As they listened to more and more tapes, you paced the apartment anxiously. The longer you were there, the closer that panic and instability got. When Matt looked towards the door, you tapped your mask and saw Dex coming down the hall.

“Убирайся.” You told them, giving Matt a shove. “Both of you. Out, now. He’s here.”(Get out.)

“You should go.” Matt told Ray.

“No, we had a deal. No evidence means you two don’t touch him!” He insisted.

“I found evidence.” Matt tried.

You groaned slightly as the two argued back and forth. You cracked the door slightly and saw Dex pulling glass adornments off the nearest light fixture. You cursed yourself quietly and shut the door again before grabbing both men by the collars and shoving them out the window.

“Go, now.” You said firmly. “I’ve got the best chance if we’ve gotta fight him.”

“What- Fight him? You said-“ Ray tried but you raised a hand and forced fear to the surface to get him to run.

“Make sure he gets out of here.” You told Matt when he hesitated. “Don’t make me make you.”

“Ex, don’t.” He tried but you did the same to him. But instead of fear, you pulled his betrayal to the surface.

Matt knew it was you. He knew what he was feeling wasn’t that serious. It wasn’t enough to make him abandon you, to leave you to stand against Poindexter on your own. But that didn’t make the urge any easier to fight. So he ran.

When you heard the door sneaking open, you moved the fire escape and pressed your back against the wall. You pulled a knife from your belt and angled it so you could watch his movements. He crept through his apartment carefully, noting the misplaced items and tapes scattered across the table.

“Show yourself.” He called out and you glanced above to find Matt and Ray, but you found no one. It made you wish you had stuck Matt with another comms piece, but blind faith would have to do for the moment. “I know you’re out there.”

One of the glass sticks came flying out and bounced off the railing in front of to knock into your blade. You gasped slightly and stuck your foot out so it landed against you rather than the metal of the fire escape.

“I can see you.” He called as you knelt to pick it up.

“How can you see me from over there?” You answered as you stood carefully. With a blade in one hand, you pulled your gun with the other.

“I was lying. Did you really fall for that?” He replied and you made a face to yourself before stepping out. 

Your gun was raised and the hand with the knife braced your wrist. He stood tense with another piece in hand and ready to throw.

“Well done. Not many people are bold enough to lie to me. What’s your name?” You asked.

“You first, then maybe I’ll do the same.” He nodded towards you.

“Nice try.” You smiled. “But two can play this game, and I have a feeling that I’m better at it than you are.”

“Don’t be so modest. I know you’re that vigilante. Let’s be honest here. You’re Exodus.” His body language relaxed a little as you stared him down, picturing the tension fall away like melted snow. “Badass out in Hell’s Kitchen. Unmatched so far, witty, and brains behind some of the best strategies he’s seen.”

“If you’re looking for a mentor, Dex, I can make sure your time is well spent. I can put you to better use than Fisk can. I’ve never been to prison so it’s not like I’ve gotten caught.”

“That’s your plan?” He chuckled in disbelief. “You and me, best friends?”

“We’ll see how it ends.” You shrugged.

“Okay.” He scoffed. “Wait.. How’d you know my name?”

“I’ve done my research. Ever since you attacked the Bulletin a few nights ago but didn’t kill me and you bragged like you knew me. Like you knew my story with the real Daredevil. I wanted to know who I would be up against. You’re good, I’ll admit it. Fisk made a good choice in picking you, an elite FBI SWAT sniper. And your partner, Y/N. She had some nice words to say, but she’s worried about you.”

“Y/N?” His brows furrowed and the tension rose again. “What did you do to her?”

“We just talked. She wants to save you from yourself.”

“That why she didn’t answer her phone? Did you hurt her?”

“No. But she is a pretty little thing, isn’t she?” You offered a wicked smile and his anger grew sharply.

“Leave her out of this.”

“Should I leave Julie out of it, too?” You mocked.

“What did you do to her?” He shouted.

“Nothing.” You answered innocently. “Yet.”

His head cocked as he silently questioned if you were serious. You took the chance to fire a bullet just over his shoulder, close enough to graze the material of his jacket. When he dropped to the floor, you rushed up the fire escape and slipped into the apartment above. You found Matt and Ray and were able to get them to the ground just as the bullets came in.

“The shot came from across the alley.” Ray said through heavy breathing. Looking over, you saw he was hit.

You were quick to kneel beside him and pull off a glove. You looked to Matt and took in his anger so you could push it to the palm of your hand. You pressed the palm against Ray’s side and he groaned loudly as the faint smell of burnt skin permeated the apartment. It wouldn’t heal the wound but it would at least slow the bleeding.

“I think it came from downstairs.” Matt countered.

“He’s ricocheting the bullets.” You confirmed, ignoring the look Ray gave you. “I’ve seen him do it a hundred times. If he can see you, he can hit you.”

Matt threw a newspaper and rolled to the other side, hiding behind a bookcase. He was talking to you about how many shots Dex had left and the fact that the cops were called when you looked around and realized something. Even from your angle behind the sofa, you could see Matt in the mirror on the door.

“The mirror.” You said to yourself and Ray noticed it at the same time.

You looked around and found a book on the coffee table. You pulled your arm back and threw it as hard as you could against the mirror, watching the reflective surface shatter when the next round of bullets came in. When Matt said to run, you helped Ray out the door before sliding to sit under the window sill. Using your mask to see the floor below, you saw Dex moving to the fire escape.

You pushed Matt out first and as you were climbing out, you saw Dex coming up the steps. You grabbed both railings and kicked both feet against his chest to send your partner tumbling back down. Matt turned around but you pushed for him to keep going. You heard the climbing stop below you just before Matt grabbed your arms and switched positions so he could block the glass sticks being thrown with a trash can lid. 

You two were reaching the roof when one piece came up and cut the strap of your mask, nicking your ear in the process. You grabbed the railing and leaned over to catch it, only to make eye contact with Dex. His arm was already drawn back to throw another one but he froze, eyes wide as he saw you.

You could see him mouth your name but you were too far away to hear it. But you weren’t far enough to miss the heavy hit of betrayal against your chest. You didn’t know what to do but when you saw Dex’s features illuminated by the police flashlights, you snapped from your daze and hurried onto the roof. You paced the area in a panic with your mask tightly in your fist.

“Hey.” Matt said when he realized what was happening. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

“He knows.” You said quickly. “He knows who I am.”

[petertingle-yipyip]

MAD AT GOD - MATT MURDOCK

season 2b - friends to lovers

tags: @astrobees @mayasaurus--rex @americaarse @dusstory @johnmurphys-sass @ironprincessstranger // season two // two // masterlist

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Word Count: 5,660

Summary: Months after Elektra, the Kitchen is down two vigilantes. Believing they could have a normal life, Matt and Y/N try domesticity. Though something still lingers within them both.

Packing up Exodus was probably the hardest decision you had to make.

Well, not the decision part of it exactly. That was done almost immediately after Elektra’s funeral. Actually following through and keeping that part of you away was the hard part.

You and Matt talked about it and decided putting away both of your alter egos was the better choice. The double lives had taken so much from you two that it just wasn’t worth it anymore. You both came to the conclusion that the Kitchen could survive without you two. It took you away from your friends too many times and most recently, it took Elektra - one of the few people who didn’t see you as a simple murderer- from you. However, packing up Exodus also meant putting your powers on the back burner.

You still absorbed a lot in your day to day activities. You used it to stop couples’ arguments from getting too angry or to raise someone’s courage so they finally ask someone on a date. But you didn’t use it to manipulate or hurt anyone anymore. You also tried not to shut everything out as much.

You were emotionally open and vulnerable. But you were also normal. Something you never really had before and it scared you. You did, however, use your powers for one thing. You made sure Matt - or anyone for that matter - couldn’t tell if you told a lie. As small a thing as it seemed, you couldn’t let yourself be completely vulnerable, even with Matt. You had seen too many people die that way.

But you still needed something to use as an outlet for everything you were getting back and late night boxing at Fogwell’s or training with Matt wasn’t always enough. There was still the darker impulses that thumped in your chest, the red haze that lingered around the edges of your vision and the siren call of mania that accompanied it.

Everything was constantly building up inside you from the moment you woke up, sometimes being so heavy that you couldn’t sleep through the night. More often than not, you ended up sitting on the roof until Matt came out to wrap you in a blanket and coax you back to bed.You felt like you could snap at any moment and that thought scared you more than anything, considering the last time you went postal you left covered in blood.

There were some good changes, too. You had moved in with Matt. Together, you two were trying to build a normal life and a normal relationship. He was starting back as a lawyer, mainly taking pro bono cases while you found something a bit more hands-on.

You heard about a security company called Anvil. When you looked into it and asked around, you found that it hired pretty much all former military. And some of the stories you heard gave you answers you were partially surprised to find but not turned away from. It was practically mercenary work, and that you were good at.

—

“Y/N, is it? Can I talk to you?” He waved you over from among the crowd.

“Hi.” You smiled as you stood in front of him. “Is there a problem, Mr. Russo?”

“I don’t know yet.” He shrugged and your brows furrowed as you rested your hands on your hips. “You’re out here making this entire group look like amateurs without breaking a sweat.”

“I don’t know. That doesn’t necessarily seem like it’s my problem.” You chuckled nervously. You didn’t like the way he seemed to be seeing right through you without your usual guards, though you could tell he was still struggling to truly figure you out.

That security felt like it was being dangled in front of you, taunting you and practically begging for you to give in. But you made a promise to Matt to be more open, and you had nothing if not the value of your word. And unfortunately, he made you promise to be open with everyone.

“It is when you don’t have a service record.” He answered coolly.

“It wasn’t stated anywhere that a service record was a job requirement. So I hope you’re not gonna send me away because of it.”

“No? Why’s that?”

“It’d be a pretty hefty discrimination lawsuit.”

“You’re a lawyer too?” His brows raised as he crossed arms over his chest.

“I am.” You smirked. “And I know two other really good ones that can win this with their eyes closed. Can you say the same?”

“Look, all I’m saying is that you don’t learn to fight like that for some back alley boxing league. Where’d you learn all that?”

“I was part of a highly elite covert kill squad.” You carefully explained and truthfully, you liked the way that omission of truth sounded. “We operated without loyalty to any nation or borders, just to each other and the man at the top.”

“Right, right… So what was it called?”

“All due respect, Mr. Russo, the name doesn’t matter. You won’t find any information about it in any headlines or database. We were the most covert operation to exist, more so than any off the books military op. We were a ghost story, a boogeyman throughout intelligence communities. No one came across us and survived.”

“So it was illegal?”

“I was part of that operation from childhood. I don’t exactly think there’s an orphanage that raises girls that way in the public eye.”

“So you were an orphan?”

“Does it make a difference, Sir?” You sighed.

“Why are you here, Y/N?”

“For the first time, I don’t have a fight.”

“But you need one?”

You couldn’t stop the laugh that tumbled out. “What is this? A psych eval? If you’re just looking for a reason to cut me than-”

“I like to know who wants to work for me. I check in on everyone that walks through those doors looking for a job and you, Ms. Y/L/N, seem to be the only ghost story around here. No record or history.”

“And that scares you.”

“It worries me.”

“How about this?” You offered with a slight smirk as you backed away a few steps and the conversation seemed to keep his interest as he followed you to the training mat. You momentarily wondered if you were doing it but you brushed the thought away quickly. “Three out of five, you and me. You win, you can send me out that door and no lawsuit.”

“Hmm.” He nodded with an amused half smile. “And if you beat me?”

“I get a job. You wanna decide points by take downs or tap outs?”

“I will let my friend, Curtis, decide points.” He pointed to one of the men that had come in with him. Though the man groaned and dropped his head, he came over and offered you a short wave. “Just not the face, alright?”

“Too pretty for that?” You mocked and you felt a spark of anger. “Ooooh… You don't like that..”

“How would you know that?” He asked tightly as he removed his jacket.

“Your eyes.” You shrugged. “There was the slightest movement of your eyebrows. They dropped enough to shadow your eyes and your grip on your jacket got tighter.”

“She’s good.” Curtis chuckled. “I’m tempted to give her a point just for that.”

“No, she doesn’t get a point for that.” He groaned but his friend only grinned, which resulted in Curtis getting the jacket thrown at his face.

“Seems you’ve drawn a crowd, Mr. Russo.” You smirked as you gestured to the gathering around the two of you as you moved to the center of the mat. “Or these guys just wanna see me get my ass kicked.”

“Call me Billy.” He smiled as he lifted his loose fists. “And yeah, I’d say the second one.”

Your attention caught on the way he set his feet, initially leading with the left before switching to lead with the right.

He swung first but you easily smacked his hand away. He threw the other hand but you knocked it away again. You ducked the next swing and spun around him, earning small exclamations from the crowd.

“You’re taking it easy on me.” You announced as Billy turned to face you.

“What makes you say that?” He teased with a cocky smirk.

“You didn’t learn to fight as a kickboxer, I’m guessing.”

“You don’t think so?”

“Kickboxers typically don’t have dominant sides. They’re light on their feet, able to switch sides with one little hop.”

You threw a sharp uppercut with your right hand that hit his stomach before you quickly changed your feet and aimed a high roundhouse that you knew would miss.

“Just like that?” Billy smirked slightly.

“Besides you’re clearly right handed.” You gestured to him vaguely and his head cocked in interest. “The gun at the back of your belt, it favors the right hand.. There’s the slightest dishevelment at the cuff of your right sleeve and a faint discoloration, too. My guess is a retractable blade, easy to conceal and almost unnoticeable. Your initial footing had your left foot forward which gives your drive off your right side, which I’m guessing is your stronger side.. Every step you take leads with the right foot. Oh, and your watch is on your left hand so it doesn’t get in the way when you write.”

“She’s getting a point for that.” Curtis announced with a wide grin.

“You’re good.” Billy nodded, now standing with his left foot forward as if to confirm your observations.

“Looking over my shoulder and figuring people out in an instant is second nature.” You shrugged as you lifted your own fists. “One misstep could’ve cost my life.”

You moved first this time, throwing a body shot that was sure to go wide. As he stepped to the side, you slammed your elbow back and connected with his ribs. He coughed roughly and you grabbed his arm. You twisted it backwards and pressed at the base of his shoulder while forcing your foot against the back of his knee to bring him to the ground.

“Lot of flexibility in your shoulder.” You leaned down to comment and rub in how easy he was to read. “You dislocate it before?”

“Torn rotator cuff as a kid.”

“Middle school baseball?”

He reached back with his free hand and grabbed the back of the arm he could reach. He dropped through a roll, causing a quick yelp to leave you as he flipped you to your back. You landed with a small smack and a groan, but you didn’t miss the celebrations from the crowd when you flattened out and you hit the ground with an annoyed groan.

“From a fight, actually.” He smiled as he knelt beside you, leaning onto his upraised knee to peer down at you.

“Why am I not surprised?” You sighed and turned your head to see his position.

You slipped your arm under his leg to grab his belt - sneaking your fingers between the belt and his pants unnoticed was the tricky part - while the other crept around the back of his neck. At the same time, you were planting your feet against the floor and leaned into the side Billy was on.

Once your hands were in positions, you pushed off and rolled to the side. Your grip on Billy allowed you to flip him over you and to his back. Once he landed, you continued your roll until you were straddling his chest, pinning his arms with your knees. You habitually raised your arm as if your Bite was around your wrist but covered the action by faking a gunshot.

“You’re getting your ass handed to you, Billy,” Curits laughed, showing a two to zero score with his hands.

“Thank you, Curtis.” Billy answered in playful annoyance as you climbed off. “Wasn’t a bad view, actually.” He said lowly as you helped him to his feet.

“Easy there.” You warned and wagged a finger at him. “Already got a man waiting for me back home.”

“Lucky guy.”

“And he knows it.” You grinned. “If I were you, I’d focus more on the fact that I’m about to win and I’m barely even trying.”

“We’ll see.” He shrugged.

He came at you fast, quickly alternating shots and keeping a tight defense. You were able to block or counter most of his offense, but a few slipped through. When you got a moment to breathe, you undid the velcro on one of your wraps and unraveled most of it.

When he threw a shot to your face, you sidestepped and wrapped the extra around his wrist. You yanked him closer and spun to the side so his own arm wrapped around his throat. You knocked his free arm out of your way and stood behind him.

You were quick to drop to your knees and pull him down with you. You let go of the wrap and released his arm, only to replace it with your own. When you saw his hands coming over to grab you, you loosened your hold enough so you could come around the side to be in front. You leaned into him slightly and tucked your knees between your bodies. His hands landed on your sides to push you over but you threw your weight back and flipped him again instead, kicking out your legs to push him all the way over.

“Okay! Okay, you made your point!” Billy called out, now on his back with his hands up in surrender. “I yield.”

You had forgotten there was a crowd until you heard the disappointed exclamations and tongue clicks before they scattered. You scoffed and sat back, hanging your arms on your raised knees.

“Welcome to Anvil.” Billy said kindly and when you looked over, you saw him standing in front of you with an outstretched hand.

“You hear that?” Curtis asked with a grin as he handed Billy back his jacket. “Sounds like wedding bells.”

“In his dreams.”

—

After working at Anvil for a few months, Billy named you Talent Assessment and Training Specialist. But that was a corporate way of saying that you weeded through the various recruit groups and sent a more refined group to Billy for final selections. And once he made his choices, you trained them and kept them sharp.

It was easy work, for the most part. Sometimes Billy had you run point on security details, but only ones that he thought were worth it for you or ones that he was going to be at himself. He liked to call you his right hand or his eyes and ears with the newbies and while it wasn’t your preferred title, you knew it wasn’t worth the argument.

It was easy to recognize that something wasn’t completely wired right in Billy’s head. Working with him sometimes felt like working with a ticking time bomb, just waiting for the right spark to set him off. It made you uneasy at times, given you had all but sworn off your powers so you felt like you were at fate’s mercy if he would have a meltdown. But after about six months of working with him, you figured out his ticks pretty quickly but in the process, you admittedly had to use your powers to calm him down.

But you were glad to finally take a full day off.

You were coming out of the bedroom when you heard Matt’s sentence abruptly stop. You saw his head turn towards the window and the grip on his papers tighten. You felt a surge of anger from the streets below and heard the faint sound of cars honking.

“Matt.” You said gently as you stepped closer. His head quickly turned to you and he smiled. “Remember, it’s for the best.”

“Yeah.” He nodded before dropping his papers into his briefcase so his hands were free to grab your hips and pull you against him. “Were you gonna be able to come by the courthouse today?”

“I am.” You smiled and wrapped your arms around his neck. “I told Russo I needed today so I’m not answering if he calls.”

“I don’t know… From what you’ve told me, I don’t think your boss likes being ignored. Especially by you.” He teased with a smile.

“Oh, Matty.. Your kinda cute when you’re jealous.”

“Nah.” He shrugged. “I’m the one you’re coming home to every night.”

“And I couldn’t be happier.” You said softly before he leaned down and kissed you gently. “Now go. Or you’re gonna be late.”

“Okay.. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

He kissed your forehead quickly before gathering his things and hurrying out the door. You stood still for a moment after you watched him go, silently thanking the universe for letting you have something good before heading to get ready for the day.

You were able to sneak into the gallery just before Matt began his questioning. You saw his head tilt towards you and a small smirk crept across his features before he focused back in on his case. You took a seat in the back and watched as Matt worked the man over, gracefully and powerfully tripping him up.

You had almost forgotten how great Matt was in a courtroom.

Once the case was dismissed, you snuck out and hung back while Matt talked to his client. You waited patiently and let him say whatever he was going to say. While you waited, you felt a gentle hand on your arm that made you jump. You turned quickly and saw Karen standing beside you.

“Hi!” You grinned and hugged her quickly.

“Hey.” She smiled back. “You see the trial?”

“He was great, wasn’t he?” You nodded. “That’s the Matt we needed way back when, huh?”

“Oh yeah.” She agreed. “But at least he’s here now. I don’t know how you did it but I’m glad you were able to get him back.”

“Yeah, I think he brought part of me back too.”

You turned and saw Matt’s head tilt towards your conversation. Tapping Karen’s arm, you nodded for her to follow you over to him. His arm lifted as you got closer and he wrapped it over your shoulders to pull you into his side.

“Congratulations, Mr. Murdock.” Karen smiled.

“Thank you, Ms. Page.” He nodded back with a humble smile.

“Y’know, you can be proud of yourself, Matt. No one’s gonna tell.” You teased and he smiled a little wider, placing a kiss to the top of your head.

“Were you here for a statement?” Matt asked Karen.

“Uh, yeah, actually.. Yeah.” She nodded.

“Why don’t we do that over lunch?” You offered as more reporters and news casters crowded the halls and yelled for Matt’s attention. “My treat.”

“That security gig pays that well, huh?” She joked and you flipped her off, earning a laugh from them both.

“Hey, give me five minutes. Okay?” Matt said quickly before taking his arm away and slowly backing towards the reporters.

“Sure.”

After a brief time of Matt answering other press questions, you three headed down to a diner not too far away. It was relatively empty, save for a few older couples that were so clearly still in love.

You wondered if you and Matt would be together that long.

“Do you wish you kept your secret to yourself?” Karen asked, looking back and forth between you and Matt.

You took a deep breath as you thought about it. You gave Matt the chance to answer first but he still seemed to be thinking.

“Sometimes, yeah.” You nodded. “It would’ve made things easier with me and you, yeah?” You gestured between you and Karen and she gave a small chuckle. “I’m glad that it’s mostly out in the open. It’s like a weight off my shoulders, y’know?”

“Mostly?”

You pressed your lips together and tapped a finger against the table, wondering if you could talk around the question. You felt Matt’s hand on your leg and when you looked over, you found him already focused on you. You had to guess that he enjoyed finally being able to fully read you after being so closed off for so long, but that didn’t mean you necessarily enjoyed it.

You were supposed to read everyone else, not the other way around.

It made you feel like you were made out of windows rather than skin and bone. You were clear, transparent. You could hide nothing, protect nothing. And you had seen that kind of vulnerability get girls killed before. Even so long into your new way of life, it was scary to think about.

But about two months prior, you felt a crushing wave of pain and fear. It crashed into you like a tsunami and overtook your entire body. You felt like you were trapped in a dark room, with walls closing in and only the faintest echo of a voice calling to you. You felt cold, hollow and alone to the point where you wanted to scream with all your might just to see if anyone could hear you. To see if you could hear yourself.

That cold lingered in your bones for days. It was noticed by Matt and even by Billy, but neither really said anything. You could feel their attention lingering on you when you were in the room as they intently watched your actions, an honest concern directed your way until suddenly that cold vanished.

No warmth replaced it. No sense of normalcy stepped in either. It was either there or it wasn’t. And then it just wasn’t.

And not being able to do anything about, to find where it came from, it made you feel like you were letting people down by not doing something. But you couldn’t afford to think about that.

“Not everyone that’s important knows about it…” You explained carefully as you realized they were still waiting for your answer. “I feel like at this point it’s not necessary to say anything cause as far as this city knows, she’s gone. But I guess it still feels like I’m lying to him.”

“Who doesn’t know?” Matt asked gently.

“I don’t think it matters.”

“Y/N.” Karen tried.

“Foggy.” You recognized they weren’t going to leave the topic alone. “I never told him.”

“What? Why?”

“Cause I know he’d be devastated… C’mon, he was pissed at you for how long?” You turned towards Matt. “If I told him what she was doing, he would never talk to me again!”

“But you told your boss?” Karen asked with furrowed brows.

“God, no.” You laughed. “I told him a very vague, basic version but he doesn’t know about her.”

“Yeah, maybe it’s for the best you don’t tell him. Foggy, I mean.” Matt nodded but you wondered if he understood your concern or just wanted to be supportive of your choice. “I’m personally glad I don’t have that secret anymore. I needed you two to know.”

“When I first figured it out, I used to wonder if it’d be easier if I didn’t know… I still wonder how it would’ve been different.” You shrugged slightly.

But you had to admit, it was nice to go through your day without wincing with every breath or hiding a new cut or avoiding touching a bruise.

“I don’t know what I expected but I..” Matt to a deep breath. “I knew I couldn’t lie to you anymore.”

“I appreciate that.” Karen nodded with a small smile.

You smiled widely as you saw the gentle purple surrounding her, swirling around her like a halo. Karen was truly happy, comfortable in her life at the Bulletin. Despite how complicated everything had gotten, how far away you all seemed at times, she had love for you two still. She still cared.

“It helps having her around.” Matt said, giving your leg a gentle squeeze and drawing your attention back to the conversation which caused the purple to fade away.

“What about you, Y/N? Do you miss it? Have you figured everything out?” Karen asked you gently.

“I did… For a while, actually.” You admitted slowly. “But then I got this new life, yknow? It’s not something I can just ignore or pretend never happened. I mean, I see these scars and sometimes it’s like I’m in that moment all over again. I’m feeling all of that pain all over again. She was a huge part of who I am and that version of myself got me to where I am today, y’know? I’d be lying if I said I don’t owe her at least a little. And she’s not going to just… disappear because I put the suit away.”

She nodded along as you spoke but you could sense she was hoping for a certain answer, a certain confirmation that you were able to move on from Exodus.

“But it’s been really nice. Having Matt and the job at Anvil. I finally feel peace, I guess… It’s nice. But it’d be wrong if I said that I don’t get that itch I need to scratch sometimes. I know she’s still in here.” You tapped your chest. “And I’m kinda glad for it.”

“Listen, as complicated as I feel about all this stuff, I just… I have to tell you guys.” She smiled softly. “The NYPD is prevailing.. Crime rate’s down and I report on it every day. I really think Daredevil and Exodus made this city a safer place.”

Matt nodded beside you and you nudged him with your elbow. He chuckled slightly and laced his fingers through yours.

“This city’s better off without them right now.” Matt said with a content smile. But you felt something beneath it, something uncertain. It made your brows furrow, only for a moment but you said nothing.

“Yeah, well, it’s better with Matt Murdock and Y/N Y/L/N.” Karen agreed.

“Speaking of your reporting, Ms. Page.” You smiled. “I’ve read some of your recent stuff. Being at the Bulletin suits you.”

“Yeah.” She grinned. “It’s been really great. But that does remind me. What happened to that big time FBI gig you were bragging about before?”

“I put everything in.” You nodded. “I just haven’t heard anything back. Dex said he would talk to the SAC and try to nudge it along a little but it’s still a process, yknow.. I’m guessing when they run their backgrounds and find absolutely nothing, it’s a little concerning.”

“It’ll work out the way it’s supposed to.” Matt offered gently.

“Yeah.” You smiled casually. “I’m not too worried about it. As long as I have you guys and Foggy, I have everything I need. Figuring out money or a job never worried me.”

“That reminds me!” Karen said and pulled her notepad from her bag.

She dove into her interview with Matt about his most recent case. You zoned in and out, not really caring what he said since you could just read her story about it later. It was a quick interview, followed by a nice and comfortable reminder of lunch. You all laughed and joked and it all felt so familiar. After lunch, you went with Matt to the church.

While he sat in the confessional with Father Lantom, you sat in a pew not far away. You were greeted with polite smiles as the older women knelt down at various places. In a pew a few rows up. In front of an altar of candles. In front of the tabernacle at the front of the church.

The idea of blind faith was never something you had. Religion as a whole was something you abandoned long ago but being there, in a place that so many regarded as holy, you felt something warm. Maybe it was the people. Maybe it was the belief that they left behind that soaked so deeply into every fiber of the building. The entire building, it was warm and faintly smelt of cinnamon though clearly nothing could’ve left the smell behind.

That place meant nothing to you, but it meant a great deal to Matt, which was the only reason you ever cared to go inside. You wanted to see what he felt so drawn to about the church and Catholicism. While you still felt no appeal, you did feel like you could find something in that place to mean something. If not the religion or the symbols or the belief within those walls, the importance to Matt was enough to give the whole thing a little bookmark in your own heart.

“What about you?” Father Lantom asked as he and Matt came back to where you were seated. “Care for a turn?”

“I don’t think even religion can absolve me now.” You said simply with a small smile, accepting what you were. “But I appreciate the offer.”

“Not even a conversation, um…?”

“Y/N.” Matt answered. “Her name’s Y/N.”

“Y/N.” Lantom smiled softly, knowingly. “The door’s always open.”

“Give it a chance.” Matt tried, nodding in the direction of the confessional. “Might help.”

“You really think I need it?” Your brows furrowed as you stood.

“I think it couldn’t hurt.” He shrugged with a lazy smile.

“I’ll pass this time around… Maybe another time.”

“Whenever you’re ready.” Lantom smiled before a short bow and left.

Your walk home was quiet. Neither you or Matt brought up the mild insinuation from the church. You didn’t think you needed any help, needed to talk anything through. You knew things had shifted since Elektra died and maybe Matt thought your conversation with Karen about your former alter egos meant something more. Maybe it sparked something in him and he assumed it sparked the same in you. The only thing about that was that it didn’t spark anything new. Those feelings had existed within you since you put her away, since you turned off your implant for what was intended to be the final time.

You were finally going to say something to Matt as he headed into the kitchen when the entire building began to shake. You reached for the countertop for support as you wobbled on your feet. Matt’s arm came around your waist and he pulled you down, covering you with his body as everything continued to shake and the sounds echoed through the city.

You found yourself gripping his jacket tightly as you heard things falling from shelves and breaking. And after what seemed like an eternity, everything quieted.

The world went still, if only for one single second.

You two stood carefully and you kicked away the shards of broken glass as you and Matt moved across the room. It was clear to you that Matt was listening to things outside, likely hearing the panic and confusion that was burrowing into your chest like a drill. The pressure of it welled up in your chest until you felt you would burst so you grabbed Matt’s hand and ran up the stairs leading to the roof.

Once you hit the fresh air, you let go of his hand and hurried to the ledge. You braced your hands against the edge and leaned over slightly with your eyes closed tight. Taking a deep breath, you tried to gather all the emotions building inside of you and released them with a slow, steady exhale.

You sighed as you felt the pressure dissipate from your chest and glanced over at Matt. He was near the corner, head turning and attention shifting quickly as he seemed to listen to everything in the city. To protect yourself from anything else overwhelming, you blocked out everything from the city below and let yourself exist in a bubble.

“Matt?” You tried when you knew you were in control. “We can’t fix this. Let’s just check on the nei-“

“C’mon.” He said quickly, grabbing your hand and sprinting across the rooftop.

You let out a small noise of surprise as he tugged you behind him but you made no effort to stop him. The feeling of running across buildings, sprinting and tumbling and jumping the alleys felt so natural that you couldn’t help but grin to yourself.

You hadn’t even realized how much you still missed it.

When you and Matt finally stopped, you could hear the voices. Kids, clearly in a panic. You wondered if they were running from the cops but the sound of a shotgun answered that question.

As you were dropping down, Matt knocked out the closest light in the alley before he joined you. You grabbed the girl and spun her out of the way as the next gunshot went off and whizzed past you two. She squealed but didn’t try to fight you as you pushed her on her way.

“They’re just kids.” Matt tried but when you turned, you saw him at the wrong end of a shotgun.

He knocked the gun away as the man pulled the trigger so you hurried in. You took the gun and jammed it against his chest, pushing him back until he hit the wall. You threw two sharp right hooks before grabbing his shirt front and throwing him towards Matt.

After a quick barrage of hits from Matt, the man wobbled towards you. You met him with a hard left cross and he fell to the floor. Looking at your knuckles, you saw them red and split in a few places.

You smiled slightly before grabbing Matt’s hand and quietly walking back home.

You knew you shouldn’t have done it.

You knew you should’ve stayed home.

Getting involved only brought Exodus that much closer to the surface.

But they were just kids… And there was so much going on, the cops wouldn’t have gotten there in time… It was just the one time.

It didn’t change anything.

Exodus was still gone.

She was retired….

Right?

[petertingle-yipyip]

WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE

finale - sinner

tags: n/a // ten // epilogue // masterlist

Pairing: frank x reader, billy x reader

Word Count: 10,008

Summary: It all comes down to one final night, where it all began. One who thinks he’s a god versus the one who once scared the Devil and the Punisher. The Devil wasn’t wrong after all to fear the evil she delivers.

David helped you get Frank into Dinah’s car. You were so out of it by then that you didn’t even know when the gun at the back of your head disappeared or what Dinah told her team for them to leave you all alone.

You sat with him in the backseat, letting yourself absorb his pain to keep him calm and give him a better chance. The drive seemed to go by in a blur given the fact that your body was still reeling with the effects the adrenaline shot. You three managed to get Frank into Dinah’s parents’ apartment and her dad helped to take care of Frank.

Your head was still pounding even though the gash had long since stopped bleeding. Your chest ached and your hand was clutching that familiarly cracked rib while your heart pounded viciously. Every breath felt ragged and your balance was uneven. Before you could say anything or catch yourself, you collapsed to the floor.

You were unconscious for hours. You woke up with your mask and suit off. Your torso was wrapped tightly and your head was carefully bandaged. You sat up and felt the uncomfortable shift of your ribs, though the pain was significantly less. You looked around and saw your bloodied mask and Bites on the nightstand. Your suit was tossed over a nearby chair and you were wearing the hoodie and sweats you had been wearing before the meeting with Billy.

Billy…

You rubbed a hand across your eyes and when you pulled it back, you noticed there were thin red lines around your wrist. Looking at it fully, you noticed the other wrist had the same marks. From the zip ties, you figured.

Dinah came in soon after and was the first to notice you were awake. She gave a tight smile and placed a folded outfit at the edge of the bed before she turned to Frank.

“Hey, Princess.” Frank said softy, reaching over to take your hand.

“Hey.” You replied and your voice was raspier than you anticipated. “It done?”

“Not yet.” Dinah answered with a sigh. “You should take Lieberman’s little gift and disappear, fast.”

“Gift?” Your brows furrowed before an envelope landed beside you on the bed. You looked at the source and David gave you a small nod. You opened it carefully and saw it was packed with hundred dollar bills while Dinah kept talking.

“I’d say the same goes for you, Y/L/N, but given the fact that no one there knows it was you, your secret’s safe for now.”

“My secret…” You repeated. “Funny you say that when my mask is across the room.”

“The only people that have seen your face are the people in this room. And my parents but they don’t know your name.”

“If I ever see you again after you walk out of this door, then all bets are off.” Dinah warned as Frank stood to leave. “I will take you in or I will shoot you down.”

“Wait.” You threw the covers back and jumped to your feet. As soon as you landed, your knees buckled and you nearly collapsed. Pushing through it, you chased after Frank and ignored the voices calling you back. “You can’t leave me.”

“You’re gonna be alright.” He said gently. “You don’t need me around, Y/N/N.”

“I don’t wanna be alone again.” Your eyes burned with the threatening tears. “I can’t take being alone again.”

“You’re not alone, okay? Call your friends, yeah? I’ll see you around.”

“Frank...”

“I know.” He practically whispered. “But you gotta trust me. Just… Please, trust me. I'm gonna take care of it.”

“I don’t need you to protect me from this.” You countered firmly.

“Alright.” He scoffed. “Look at yourself, Y/N. That rib’s been busted almost as long as I’ve known you. Your head gets split open once a month. You’re probably living with a concussion, God knows what else. You keep going like this, this thing is gonna crush you.”

“I don’t care. I need to see this to the end.”

“It’s not your fight, Princess. You steer clear of this and I know that even if he kills me, he’ll leave you alone.”

“I can fight for myself. And you wanna talk about what’s happened to me, you’re no better off.”

“Doesn’t matter.” He shrugged.  “You’re one of the few things left worth fighting for, alright? So that’s what I’m gonna do.”

“And I’m not helpless. I can go through this and not die.”

“Yeah? I bet Red thought the same thing and look where he ended up.”

Without hesitation, you brought your hand up and slapped him across the face. You hadn’t even realized you had done it until the sound seemed to echo throughout the room. Your eyes went wide in mild shock at your own action, but at the same time, it didn’t surprise you to react that way.

No one got to talk about Matt and his death, especially someone who wasn’t there.

He pushed past you after that, upset that you had hit him but also relieved that you were passed at him. Using your powers for a brief moment, you understood he wanted you to be mad at him so you’d stay away. So you’d leave him to die if it came to it.

He didn’t seem to realize just how stubborn you could be.

You went back into the bedroom and collected your gear. You tucked it under your sweatshirt and thanked Dinah for her help again. You asked her to thank her dad and wished David best of luck with his family before you left. Dinah was saying something about her seeing it through and that you or Frank didn’t have a monopoly on payback. Truthfully, you let it go in one ear and out the other.

Billy Russo was going to pay. You spared him too many times. In turn, he spared you but the tit-for-tat system was getting you nothing. Nothing but physical pain and injury and for what? For him to win?

You got into your apartment and once again found Karen inside, the chest that hid Daredevil open at her feet. She apologized and said she tried to call. Her explanation shifted to questions when she saw the bandages on your forehead while you pulled your bloodied alias from under your hoodie. You simply threw the pile into the closet and kept moving past her, towards your bedroom. You paused at the small box you had kicked out of your way before so you picked it up and brought it with you.

You sat on the edge of your bed and unfolded the small piece of paper that was tucked under the edge of the lid.

-sorry about everything, billy-

You made a face to yourself before tossing the paper and opening the box.

It wasn’t until you heard your front door close did you pull your phone. You called the familiar number, knowing it’d be the last time. It had to be.

“And here I was thinking you didn’t want anything to do with me. To what do I owe the pleasure?” He said when he answered and to your surprise, there was no malice in his words.

“Can’t I just call to check in?” You answered.

“I didn’t think you’d want to, given the fact that you, yknow, shot me.”

“And you slammed my head into a pole till I went unconscious so I’d say it balances out.”

“Why are you calling, Y/N?”

“Why’d you answer, Billy?”

“General curiosity.” He said simply. “Your turn.”

“The watch.” You spun it in your hand and your fingers felt a difference in texture. Glancing down, you almost laughed. “Was it one of yours?”

“No, picked it out just for you.”

“So what’s with the BR on the inside of the strap?”

He chuckled as if he was caught and the mundaneness of the conversation felt so out of place.

“I saw that ring your Matt got you, the one with his name in it. Thought if we could smooth things over, you’d have something with mine but…”

“At least it’ll get a good chunk from the pawn shop.” You shrugged.

“Ouch. I know it doesn’t match your little costume, which I gotta say, makes you look great.”

“C’mon, Billy. You’re gonna tell me you don’t understand that all this is on you? Your choices led us here.”

“You made a choice too. But you don’t see me throwing that back at you.”

“Difference is I made a good one. You’ve done yourself no favors.”

“I still don’t get what’s so special about Frank.”

“That man was damn near dead and he was worried about me. He’s always taken my side and looked out for me. You say that you’d never hurt me but I know he wouldn’t. He’s the closest to family that I have in New York. You don’t get to take that from me.”

“As much as I love our little chats, Beautiful, I’ve got things to take care of.”

“If you manage to get through Frank and it comes down to you and me, you’re dead.” You warned.

“Can’t wait.”

The line went dead and you dropped the phone in your lap. You rubbed your aching eyes and took a few deep breaths, as deep as the tight bandages would allow.

You were running through scenarios as to what Billy would be up to. Hiding at Anvil was an option, but unlikely. You figured Homeland would’ve raided the place by now, or at the very least be in the process of raiding. Same could be said about his place. His bridge with you and Dinah was burned so he wouldn’t be on his way to either place.

All that really could leave would be Curtis.

Curtis.

You jumped up quickly and hurried to change. You dressed in a hurry before practically running to the closet. You shoved a gun into the waistband of your pants and snatched your bag before you left. You were nearly

sprinting to your car to get to Curtis’ place.

You thought to call Frank but how could you? You doubted he had any sort of burner, not one you had the number of at least. Besides, he was more than willing to do it without you. Dinah wouldn’t be the help you needed. So you were on your own.

You banged on the door and waited for an answer, though you were met with silence. You banged on it again, harder than before, and still got no response. You muttered to yourself about Curtis sleeping like the dead before you knelt and reached under your shirt for one of the metal fasteners on the bandages. You bent it back and forth until it snapped into two pieces and you used the pieces to pick the lock.

You drew your gun and carefully opened the door, seeing a phone slide across the floor. You moved in slowly and saw Billy on the other end of the room, ducked below the windowsill. Your eyes scanned the room and it was easy to see the bullet holes. You nodded towards the window in question and Billy gave you a small nod before he lifted the phone to his ear.

You saw Curtis peak around from the floor of the kitchen and your focus immediately changed. You hurried over and dropped the gun at your side before examining the wound. You gently pulled the collar of his shirt aside to see the bloodied injury. You clicked your tongue, knowing there wasn’t much you could do at the moment, and applied pressure.

“Finish this where it all started.” You heard Billy say.

You gave no outward reaction but you knew what he meant.

Midnight at the carousel.

He left after that but you stayed at Curtis’ for a while longer. You two talked about what Billy was doing there while you waited for the ambulance. You were glad it was only the one gunshot and the shot itself wasn’t lethal. Whatever Billy’s plan there was, it wasn’t about killing Curtis, and you were thankful for that.

You went back home once the ambulance took him away. You had washed your hands at his place, but they still felt wet. Dripping with the blood of everyone you’d met. Everyone you’d hurt. Everyone you’d killed.

You had to shake the thought as you got to your apartment. You knew what you had to do, only it wasn’t a job for Y/N. It was set up for Exodus to finish.

Kill Billy Russo. Save Frank, save yourself.

It seemed so simple when you thought of it that way and maybe it was that easy. You were in the closet under the stairs gathering your equipment in a duffel bag. A clean suit, your new vest, Bites, gloves, mask with intact lenses, staffs, and a fully loaded belt. You fit the retractable blade to your wrist and tossed two handguns on your couch before going to your bedroom to change.

Dark fitted pants, dark red fitted long sleeve, your usual vigilante boots. You fit your FBI issued vest over it for the time being and threw a loose zip up over it. You sent a quick text to Dex before you threw your phone to your bed.

central park carousel 1230

Your phone landed beside the watch and you found yourself wanting to break it, stomp your heel on it and hear the glass break. Pull the straps apart and drive a knife through the rest. But you didn’t. You’d bury it with him. Dead, just like your feelings for him.

You pulled your hair back and looked at the long gash on your forehead, opposite the side of your mask scars. It buried itself in your hairline and was nearly healed, the slightest discoloration in your skin. You blew out a sigh and stared at your face as a whole.

She looked like you, close enough at least. Half alive compared to what you looked like when you first came to town. Twice as weak. More vulnerable than you ever intended, more willing to let people in. For that, you blamed Matt. It was easier to decide it was his fault

but you still looked for him in any other man.

But it seemed like every person you let in was another scar, another injury, more blood loss. You were always the loser, but as you stared into your ghosted eyes, you decided you’d get through the fight.

And if it killed you, then at least you tried. You had lived a life worth more than anything you would’ve had in the Red Room.

Despite all the sentiment, you couldn’t afford the vulnerability. The weakness. So you watched as the light Frank saw not too long ago fade from your eyes, locking away the weakness behind Exodus’ strength. What filled the light’s absence was almost as hollow, almost as empty. It was the look of a killer, of someone who has courted death.

It was the look of someone who truly was half alive. Someone that once brought out fear in the Devil of Hell’s kitchen, that decimated the Russians, uprooted Fisk’s empire, crushed the Yakuza. A trained killer, raised on the bitter taste of blood and changing the history of man. Someone who you tried to get away from but what’s good was that?

She was your shadow, and to be rid of that would be to lose a piece of yourself.

So be it.

You went back into your living room and placed your guns at your back, tucked into your belt. You stopped in at the closet one more time to add a knife inside your boot before you grabbed your bag. You slung it over your shoulder and bounded down the stairs to your car, throwing the bag into your backseat.

You drove over to the park, leaving your car a block away. You were going to survey the area and see if you could get a better vantage point, somewhere you could see it all but Billy wouldn’t see you. Before you left your car, you grabbed your Bites and shoved them in your jacket pockets.

You were wandering the emptying area, offering polite smiles to the kids who made eye contact with you while they laughed wildly. Their parents apologized but you assured them it was fine as you kept going. You had circled the small novelty feature and found nothing interesting until there was a small clatter inside the snack bar. You thought nothing of it at first but you moved closer to make sure.

Their voices were muffled, deeper into the room than you initially anticipated. You fitted your Bites into place and tugged your sleeve down to cover as you snuck into the room. You didn't need your mask to see that it was Billy, especially when their fear began to burn your tongue.

Your hand flexed and your Bite activated as you gave yourself a clear shot.

“Let them go, Bill.” You said flatly and you noticed your accent tinting your words. The girl yelped from the other room and Billy turned to face you calmly. You lifted your hand and aimed your weapon with the same sense of control. “They don’t have anything to do with this.”

“You wanna take their place?” His brows raised.

“Sure.” You shrugged. “If it’s to get to Frank, he’s gonna care more about me anyway.”

He tilted his head in acknowledgement before gesturing for the kids to leave. They squeezed past him and practically ran out, stammering a rushed ‘thank you’ as they passed, but you didn’t take your eyes off Billy.

“No suit this time?” He asked, leaning against the wall behind him. He crossed his arms and you noticed his gun was still in play, poking out from between his forearm and bicep. “But the accent’s kinda hot. Where’s that been this whole time?”

“Funny.” You rolled your eyes.

“Lighten up.” He tried with a smile but your expression didn’t change. “Jesus, Y/N, will you put that down?”

“No.”

“Alright, well then.” He sighed and moved quickly.

He fired his gun, hardly even moving it. The bullet hit the inside of your raised wrist and you cried out, arm falling down almost immediately. You examined the joint and were thankful it didn’t get through the Bite. However, your relief was short lived when the sharp electricity shot through your arm. Looking closer, the bullet cracked your weapon and now it was shorting out, releasing unregulated bursts.

You were reaching to take the device off when Billy’s touch stole your attention. Your head snapped up and as soon as your eyes met, he backhanded you with his pistol and you fell to the floor.

The sudden lights and movement pulled you back. Your eyes fluttered open and your arm still twitched from the electricity. Your arms were above your head, bound to the pole of the carousel horse that you could feel along the length of your spine.

You blinked through the lights and pulled on your restraints, which only sent another shock through your arm and you felt the zipties dig deeper into the tender skin. Why he didn’t take the Bites off, you didn’t know. Maybe the faulty one shocked him when he touched it. You shifted your body and felt both guns still against your back and shaking your foot, you felt the knife handle in your boot. Yet your jacket was gone.

You figured he left them because if you were restrained, it didn’t matter what weapons you had on your person.

“Billy?” You tried but opening your mouth allowed for a new pain to begin thumping at your jaw.

You rolled your eyes to yourself when you realized it was from when he hit you. You were going to get him back for that.

You had a feeling you were alone, or at least that he wanted to feel that way. As you spun on the stupid horse, you scanned the area. You knew he had to be somewhere. You felt the pride bouncing off the mirrors around you but the source wasn’t visible.

“Billy!” You yelled and pulled the restraints again, this time breaking skin on one side. “Goddammit…”

Your implant pinged in your head so you adjusted your head to bump your shoulder until it answered.

“The hell you doing here, Princess?” Frank asked tightly. Anger was in his voice but it didn’t feel directed at you, not completely at least. The concern between the syllables was.

“Not much at the moment.” You answered, shifting in the horse to sit sideways and get a better view of the restraints. You winced loudly as another shock ran up your arm and it made you wonder how much more juice was in that damn thing. “Could use some help.”

“Didn’t I tell you to stay out of it?” He argued instead and you had to roll your eyes.

“Sorry, I missed the part where I was supposed to listen to you.” You answered sarcastically. “Besides, it’s not like I planned to be stuck to a stupid horse.”

“You think you’ll be alright for a few minutes till I can get to you?”

“Sure.” You said before pulling on your wrists to get them further down the pole. “If my arm doesn’t lock up.. Dying would be one hell of an adventure, don’t you think?”

“What?”

“Nothing, nevermind.”

“You see him?”

“No.”

“Alright. I’m coming.”

You nudged your shoulder to shut it off and turned your focus back to your restraints. You tried twisting your wrists in opposite directions but it just dug the plastic deeper until the other side broke skin. Your next thought was the knife in your boot, but you’d fall off the horse trying to get it out. Next thought was the knife at your wrist. You were adjusting your hands to ensure the blade didn’t knick you when the explosions sounded.

Three loud, bright collisions that made you jump and nearly fall off the stupid animal. You craned your neck to look but that ridiculous spin put you on the other side while the gunfire sounded.

You slammed your foot against the closet horse in annoyance and Billy came into your field of vision, keeping low to likely keep visual on Frank.

“C’mon, Billy.” You commented, taking a deep breath and readjusting to sit back up on the horse. “Here I was thinking you were gonna play fair.”

“Shut up.” He sneered, still not looking at you.

“I’m just saying.” You shrugged, looking up at your hands again. You tried to flick the blade out but the tight constricts kept you from being able to fully move it. You groaned in annoyance and turned your attention back to Billy.

Manipulation it was.

“Billy, baby, c’mon.” You tried instead, drawing on that need he had to be wanted. “You don’t wanna do this. Not to me.”

“Shut. Up.”

“Let me outta these, yeah?” You kept pushing and found the slightest piece of admiration for you. He tried to hide it, to ignore it so killing you wouldn’t hurt him. But you found it. The slightest hint of an attachment. “We can… We can fix us. That’s what you want, right? You and me, clean slate.”

At that, he turned his head. The colored neon showed just enough of his expression that you saw the wide eyes he gave you. Disbelief, but want so clear on his face. If you had seen that expression hours before, maybe it would’ve changed your mind.

“C’mon, Bill. You don’t wanna hurt me, right?” You urged, nearing your own desperation as your arm was hit again and the jolt made your whole body react. “Please.”

The skin beneath the damaged Bite was burning, likely being worn through by the constant assault. The muscles in your arm were victim to constant spasms, soaked through with the remnants of electricity. It was almost enough to make you scream.

Billy drew closer but didn’t put his rifle down. He kept looking between you and the scene behind you, keeping an eye out for Frank no doubt. If Frank got close enough, you knew you could count on him to get you out, but at the time, that wasn’t an option.

So instead of screaming, you let yourself cry. You would’ve used some old pain or trauma of your own, but there was enough coming from Frank that you didn’t need to.

“Billy..” You said in a small voice, hoping to appear helpless and pathetic as the tears fell down your cheeks. “Please, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry, just…”

He had just taken a hand of his gun to reach for a knife when he must’ve seen Frank. He was quick to raise his gun again as shots came in from the other side. You tried to duck and a bullet hit the center of the zipties wrapped around the pole. Your arms fell quickly and you reached to grab Billy’s rifle.

Once your hands were on it, you spun your legs and went off the opposite side of the house to force his gunfire towards the middle of the carousel. He released the trigger after a bullet bounced back and caught him in the cheek, causing him to fall to the ground yelling in pain.

You smiled slightly as he spit out the bullet. You knelt down, ensuring your foot was on the rifle, and grabbed Billy by his face. Your fingertip pressed on the new wound and fresh blood bubbled out and over your fingers. The sight drew another sadistic smile.

“What happens when you’re dead, hmm?” You asked, an innocent tone in your voice that didn’t match the scene at all. “Who’ll mourn you?… Look at you now, pretty boy. Какая пустая трата этого красивого лица.” (What a waste of this pretty face.)

He shoved your hand off and grabbed you by your throat. You let him back you against the center of the carousel and laughed to yourself when he pulled a handgun. You snuck your hand behind your back and grabbed one of your own, carefully wrapping your fingers around the cold metal as his came to your forehead.

“Count of three?” You asked with a smile.

He added more pressure to his grip and you coughed slightly at the restriction of air.

“You come out where I can see you, Frank, or I kill her right now!” Billy yelled, looking in either direction for Frank before looking back at you. “You beg.”

“No.” You said flatly.

“You beg Frank to come out and save your life, right now!”

“Fuck you!”

“Beg!”

“You know I’d never hurt you right?” You mocked him loudly, though it wasn’t much of a yell with his hand around your throat. “I never loved you, y’know.”

“What?”

“I was just passing the time.” You shrugged, a sadistically out of place smirk finding your lips. “I bet you loved me though. Cause I knew how to lie.”

“I’m gonna enjoy this.” He sneered but the venom in his tone did nothing to hide the blue fog that seemed to shape his words.

“I doubt it. And as far as Frankie’s concerned, yeah, he doesn’t care about me either.” You laughed. “Go ahead and pull the trigger. I dare you.”

“Let her go, Bill.” Frank said from a few feet away but your eyes didn’t leave Billy.

“Doesn’t care, huh?” Billy taunted before turning back to Frank, instructing him to ditch his gun.

You heard the clatter of his gun and soon after, his knife.

“Идиот.” You said to yourself, which caused Billy to pull you a few inches forward and slam you back. The impact triggered another shock from your busted device and you cried out sharply. (Idiot.)

“Shut up or I put a bullet in you right now!” He screamed in your face.

“Давай.” You sneered through gritted teeth. (Go ahead.)

“Bill, let her go.” Frank tried, desperation spewing from him like a busted pipe. “Let her go.”

“Attachments are a weakness, Frank.” Billy said, his voice dripping with condescension. He let you go to take a few steps closer to Frank and you collapsed, one side of your body still tingling with the electricity of your Bite. “I never had anybody.”

“Don’t.” You tried to get to your feet but Billy ignored you.

“You had us, Bill.” Frank answered and Billy shot him.

You flinched at the sound and looked up, surprised to see Dinah kneeling in front of you. Suddenly, you were the one starting to panic.

“What are you doing here?” You asked quietly as she helped you to your feet. “How did you know where we would be?”

“You okay?” She asked in the same hushed tone instead.

“I’ve got cuts around both wrists and I’m pretty sure I’ve burnt some of the nerves in my wrist and hand. What do you think?” You gave a sarcastic expression. “Listen, he’s lost it, alright? You need to-“

Before you could finish your sentence, a gunshot sounded and Dinah went down. Her finger on the trigger went off as she did and the bullet from her gun nicked the underside of your jaw, skirting along the bone. You teetered back against the mirrored center and the commotion started between the boys. You opened and closed your mouth to break up the burn from the bullet and peered down at the fallen agent, blood pooling from the new hole in her skull.

Your previous panic was burned out, replaced by a familiar heat of anger. A heat you used to curse but were thankful for. Your anger came with the red tint, the manic bloodlust that had come to worry you. Only now you reveled in it, welcomed it. You counted on it. You would thrive with it.

Billy was too focused on fighting Frank to realize you were coming up behind him. You ran up and used the pole closest to him as leverage. You gripped it with both hands and threw your feet forward to hit his back and send him to the floor.

He spun to his back as you were landing and he kicked one of your feet out, dropping you to your knees. You began to reach behind you when a bullet hit your wrist. It went in through the bottom and came out the other side. You cried out and clutched the bleeding joint. You yanked the broken Bite off and the shattered device left chunks of material behind in the opening. Blood bubbled and filled the now empty space and your hand trembled while a thick stream leaked down your arm.

You reached into your boot for your knife to cut your sleeve off. Using your teeth, you pulled some of the fabric away from your arm and pierced it with the knife. You yanked it down your arm before trying it haphazardly around your wrist. You tried to flex that hand, ensure there was enough blood getting to your digits, but the muscles were already tight from the electricity.

You had no idea if you’d bleed out by the time the night ended. It was a sharp slap in the face to realize that you really could die that night, to something as stupid as blood loss.

Matt’s voice came into your head at that point.

C’mon, Sweetheart. You’re not giving up yet.

You shook the thought and focused back on the scene in front of you. Billy had just thrown Frank to the ground so you grabbed your knife again and went after him.

You reached around from behind and out the blade to his neck. Before you could pull it and slice him open, he grabbed your arm and flipped you over his shoulder. Your back hit hard and he began turning the blade to point at you.

One of his hands wrapped around yours to keep the knife in your hand and the other pushed on your arm. You threw your free arm up to block it and flicked out the short blade at your wrist. You swung it quickly and blindly, but you felt it connect. Where it hit, you didn’t know but it was enough for him to let you go.

Frank got to your side and helped get you to your feet. You gripped your knife tighter and it shifted against your bloody palm before you put it away.

You wanted to do it with your bare hands.

Billy’s foot connected Frank’s chest and he fell back against one of the horses. 

You waited until you saw Frank up on his hands and knees before you moved. You vaulted over Frank, planting your hands on his back for stability as you kicked your feet forward. Your legs wrapped around Billy’s waist and you hauled yourself upright. The momentum of your upper body was enough to throw him into the nearest pole. One hand locked around the strap of his bulletproof vest from the underside while the other threw sharp punches.

You felt his hands on your waist and before you could react, he was driving forward with the intent of slamming you into something. You released his vest and pulled your hand back quickly, slicing a shallow gash from the middle of his jaw to his temple. You brought both arms up and slammed your elbows down against his spine, just as the middle of your back hit hard against the carriage-shaped seat and knocked the air out of you before you collapsed to your knees, wheezing in a poor effort to refill your lungs.

Again, Matt’s voice but this time he said a phrase you had never said around him. Something you learned from your aunt.

You can’t breathe, you can’t fight.

That was when you knew you were losing it. He shouldn’t have known that saying, yet you heard his voice as clear as the music around you. If you went down, you truly understood, you wouldn’t get back up. And for once in your life, that actually scared you.

You moved back at him quickly, swinging your blade at Billy. He ducked it easily and you wondered for a moment if it was due to the blood you lost. You buried the thought and moved in again, aiming a sharp jab at the bottom of his bulletproof. He jumped away from your attack and you dropped to your knees to knock his feet from under him.

As he fell, you pulled your blade back out. You flipped it over the back of your hand and tried to slam it down, aimed right at the soft spot at the base of his throat. His hand shot up and caught your hand, desperately trying to keep the tip of your knife away.

You threw your leg over him so you were straddling his chest with hopes of leaning enough of your weight forward to get the knife to pierce. After a few more seconds of no progress, you groaned loudly and pulled your hand back. You lifted the knife high and held it in both hands.

You screamed loudly in frustration as you drove it down again. Billy was quick to throw you off, your knife getting lost in the process. You two kept rolling until he was able to get on top of you and pinned your arms above your head.

You thrashed under his weight but to no avail. Every movement seemed to drain more strength than usual so out of desperation, you slammed your forehead against his. He fell off you and you were quick to shift and kick your feet hard, one heel catching him in the cheek in the same spot your knife slashed earlier.

You got to your feet and took a deep breath as Billy got up, only a few feet away from you. You two locked eyes a moment and from the taste in your mouth, you knew you weren’t the woman he was used to seeing. Now bloodied, chest heaving with heavy breaths, eyes empty save for the thought of murder. You were what the rumors said Exodus to be, especially when you smiled.

You rushed him again and threw an acrobatic kick that made him stagger backwards. When you landed, you swung the blade at your wrist. You made sure to keep your bloodied wrist out of the way for the most part, relying on the short knife on your wrist. You managed to catch him with small gashes, just able to slice his shoulder or his arm.

The tip of Billy’s wrist blade came at you and caused you to change your stance, resulting in a shallow stab to your stomach and exposure of your injury as you swung a heavy hook to counter. He caught your wrist and held tightly but you refused to make a sound. Instead, you used the other hand to grab his shirt and hooked a foot around his. You threw your body weight and flipped you two over again so you slammed into the ground. You landed on your side, aggravating your long standing rib injury, and you groaned to yourself as you uneasily got up to your feet.

Before you even register Billy’s location, he grabbed the back of your neck instead and you shot a foot out to keep him from slamming your head again. You added the other foot and kicked off, throwing your body against his.

He hit the horse behind him and you hit him, but both of you went down.

Frank took over at that point, pinning him down and beating on him while you used one of the horses to haul yourself up. Your hands slipped from the blood and your own legs threatened to go out from under you. You glanced down and saw the makeshift dressing was already soaked through and dripping. You groaned to yourself and wondered how much longer until it was half past midnight and Dex would show up.

Matt’s voice came again.

If you can’t stand, you can’t fight… Get up and fight. Back. Don’t let him win.

You wobbled on your feet and you were turning back at the fight when Frank slammed into your side. Your ribs knocked into the horse and felt the crack echo through. You groaned loudly before pushing yourself up, just in time for Billy to grab you by your hair.

Before he could do anything, you jumped over the horse and heard the thud of him hitting it behind you. You spun to face him before you pulled his arm over the top of the horse and you slammed your elbow down. The snap was loud and he cried out, signaling it broke. You smiled viciously before you fired from your Bite, a shot that caught him on the shoulder. He reeled away and you fired again, hitting almost the same spot. You followed after him and slammed the blade at your wrist into his shoulder before you grabbed his shirtfront. You yanked hard while throwing yourself back, pulling you both to the ground.

Your bloodied hand reached behind you and pulled one of the guns. You leaned back and the blade pulled back with you while you aimed. Before you could fire, he knocked the gun out of your hand. He changed your positions and you were on your back with his knee on your bulleted wrist.

As if on cue, Frank tackled Billy off.

“Никогда не заканчивается, не так ли…” You said to yourself, holding your fragile hand to your chest. (Never ends, does it…)

You had practically no feeling left in it and your fingertips were growing cold to the touch. You could move the digits but just barely. For a second, you thought they’d have to amputate your hand.

You forced the thought away and made your way back to Frank who had Billy against the mirrors. As you got closer, you saw the blood dripping from Billy’s stomach. You got there just in time for Frank to drag Billy’s face down the shattered mirror and you smiled genuinely. Frank backed off for a second to check on you and Billy tried to use the moment to his advantage.

You caught the punch he threw and shoved your short blade through his forearm, seeing the tip of the blade come out the other side. He screamed out and you forced him arm down, pressing your other at the base of his shoulder before you dragged him in a circle and shoved him face first into the jagged mirror. The action pulled the blade off your wrist but the blade was still lodged in his arm.

Frank held Billy by his hair and put a piece of the broken mirror against his throat. You stood beside your friend and pulled out your other gun, pressing it to Billy’s temple.

“Everyone I know will know your name.” You said lowly. “И все они будут презирать тебя за то, что ты сделал.” (And they’ll despise you for what you’ve done.)

You two met eyes in the shattered mirror while Billy mumbled something you weren’t listening to.

Your hearing had muffled itself by then. The edges of your vision were blurring and you felt unsteady on your feet but you pushed as the adrenaline faded from your blood. You persisted because you needed to see it through.

You came too far.

The two boys exchanged words before Frank put his weapon away. You hesitantly did the same but before you could attempt to speak, Frank kicked Billy into the glass again.

He slammed Billy into it a few more times while saying something you didn’t register. He offered you a turn and instead of slamming his head, you kicked your foot forward and your heel hit his face. You heard the crunch as the shards dug in deeper and while Frank finished his monologue, you remembered Dinah.

You made your way over and practically collapsed at her side. She was alive, at least. By the time Frank got to you, you were on the brink of passing out. Frank tried talking to you but you hardly processed any of it.  Instead, you forced the other Bite off and shoved it into his hand.

He practically threw the device before he sat beside you and carefully dragged you into his lap. One arm was behind you to keep you upright while the other reached for the bullet wound. You were fighting to keep your eyes open when you felt a sudden cold.

You weren’t sure if it was your own body temperature or Frank but when you got your eyes to focus, if only for a second, you couldn’t miss the blue haze across Frank’s eyes.

“I’m sorry.” You managed weakly. 

“You’re okay…” You couldn’t hear his words but you could read his lips. “It’s gonna be- gonna be okay. Just stay with me.”

Your head fell to the side and you saw a figure running up to you. He practically fell to his knees in front of you and his hands carefully cupped your cheeks.

————————————

You were no longer cold or in pain. You were no longer dripping blood and in agony. Everything was calm, quiet. Everything felt peaceful.

You felt at peace for the first time.

The scene around you had changed from the carousel to a vast, empty space. There seemed to be a spotlight on you and Matt, while everything else was drowned out in a heavy darkness.

“You’re safe, baby.” Matt promised. “You can stay here, with me.”

“I love you.” You said quietly.

“I love you, too.” He smiled.

—“C’mon, Princess. Not here.”—

“Did you hear that?” You asked, glancing around the shadows before Matt pulled you against him.

“Hear what?” His brows furrowed as he led you in a small box step. “It’s okay, Y/N/N. They can’t hurt you anymore.”

—“Y/L/N? Can you hear me?”—

“No, someone else is…” You shook your head as you understood something. Looking at Matt, you realized he was looking at you in return.

Looking at you, meaning he could see you.

—“I can’t find a pulse. We’re losing her!”

If Matt could see you, if Matt was there with you, then you weren’t at the carousel. Not consciously, at least. You were on the true brink of death.

“I’m dying.” You realized.

“Stay with me.” Matt tried, holding you a bit tighter as if he knew you had to choose.

“I can’t…” You whispered. “I can’t die like this, Matty.”

“Please.”

“My beautiful baby.” A female voice said.

Your attention turned quickly and you saw a woman standing a few feet away. She had tears in her eyes and her hands covered her mouth, but the crinkle at her eyes showed you she was smiling. You dared to take a step closer and you realized the woman had the same eyes you did.

“Mom?” You asked quietly, your stomach sinking.

“Hi, sweet girl.” She answered sweetly. “You grew up so beautiful.”

“Mom…”

“Hi, Y/N.”

Y/N… No, that wasn’t right. Your mother should’ve used the name she had given you. The name Dreykov took away.

“This isn’t right.” You said to yourself.

—“Goddamit, Y/N. You don’t get to die here, too… I told you to stay outta this.”—

“It’s okay.” Matt offered. “You don’t have to fight anymore. Isn’t that what you wanted? Peace.”

“Yeah… But not like this. Not if it hurts them.”

“It’s not about them.” Your mother’s voice - what you imagined her voice to be at least - came again. “It’s about you and your peace. Why should you go back for them?”

—“Dammit, Y/L/N, come on!”—

“I can’t leave them.” You understood. “Not like this.”

“Sweetheart?” Matt tried.

“I love you, Matt, so much. Every beat of my heart will be yours until it stops. I'm just not ready to die.”

“I love you too, Y/N/N.” He smiled softly, a sight that was nearly enough for you to stay with him.

“I will never love another, not like I loved you. I just don't have the love for it again… And I’m sorry I let you down.”

“You never let me down.” He gave you a small smile. “You’re exactly who you’re supposed to be.”

————————————

Your eyes opened to a hospital setting. You felt the throb of your pulse at your tightly wrapped wrists. Your entire body was stiff, taped and wrapped and bandaged in various places. You tried moving to adjust on the bed but the pain in your ribs reignited and you froze.

But the explosions were gone. The heat in your veins extinguished. The eternal hole swallowing whatever was left of your soul was erased. Being that close to death seemed to reset your emotional alignment.

“Just relax.” A familiar voice said from your side. Looking over, you saw Dex beside you and you felt some relief in the familiar face.

“How long has it been?” You asked, though you could barely hear your own voice.

“Four days.”

“You’ve been here the whole time?”

“Yeah.” He breathed in relief. “Pretty much, yeah. I had to make sure you pulled through, y’know”

“Guess that’s why you look like shit.” You joked.

“You’re one to talk.” He laughed lightly.

“Four days…” You repeated thoughtfully. “Does that mean Russo’s dead?”

“Uh, no. No, he’s not. Eleven hours under the knife and they’re still not sure if he’ll regain any significant brain function. Some of the nurses were saying he may not even remember the name if he ever wakes up.”

“What about Castle? Madani?” The incessant beeping from the corner of the room, likely the machine tracking your vitals, began to sound quicker. “Dex, don’t tell me this was all for nothing.”

“They’re alright.” He spoke quickly but his eyes stayed on the beeping machine. “They’re fine. Madani woke up earlier from what I hear. Looks like you took the real brunt of it.”

“Okay, good.” You sighed in relief and you lifted your more heavily bandaged hand to examine the wrapping. “Speaking of, just how bad?”

As if on cue, the doctor came in and gave you a quick rundown. Burned nerves in your hand. Shattered bones in your wrist. Deep cuts around both wrists. Severely broken rib. Concussion. Various bruises and cuts, including a stab wound near your belly button and a bullet nick under your jaw.

She suggested pins to repair the rib and said you’d need some physical therapy for your hand, along with a brace to absorb impacts from work even though they weren’t sure if the pain would ever go away. Some dexterity would be lost but you had expected that. She also explained that they utilized the bullet’s entry and exit to do most of the bone repair so there wouldn’t be additional scarring, as if that small cosmetic detail would make you feel better.

It didn’t.

You denied the pins and before she could try to convince you, your SAC walked in.

“You’re insane, you know that?” She said flatly once the doctor left.

“Yeah, so I’ve been told.” You agreed. “I’m guessing I’m fired?”

“No… Agent Madani explained why Russo was such a target for you two and it’s enough to piss off and interest both bureaus. Together, the bureaus will provide you two with all the legal resources we can to get Russo behind bars.”

“Behind bars…” You repeated slowly. “Attempted murder on two feds and manslaughter of another?”

“It’s my understanding that he won’t stand trial for Agent Stein since the operation was falsified.”

“You’re kidding.” You groaned. “Alright, well what about Castle?”

“What about him?” She shrugged. “Officially, he was never there.”

“He saved my life.” You argued firmly.

“The narrative has been… redirected. Lewis Wilson and William Russo are the only suspects anyone needs. Your statement and Agent Madani’s statement will corroborate that. Homeland had worked very hard to give your ‘friend’ his life back. Do you really want to take that from him?”

“Did Madani agree to this?”

“She’s the one who wanted to help Castle.”

“I want to see him.”

“No, we need to take your statement first. Interactions outside of this may influence your memory.”

“Well as of now, my statement includes Frank Castle going toe to toe with Russo to give me every chance to go home.” You said sharply. “It includes every hit he took that was meant for me and how I was used as bait to lure him out while you are trying to influence my memory.”

“Traumatic events can impact your memory of the event in its entirety.” Your SAC countered calmly. “Frank Castle was never there.”

“Your statement needs to match the official report, Y/N/N.” Dex tried, a more gentle tone than Hattley.

“Then maybe I should wait till it comes out for it to jog my memory.” You sneered.

“You’ve lost a lot of blood, agent.” Hattley said instead. “Get some rest and we’ll try again later.”

Once she left, you turned to Dex.

“I wanna talk to Frank.” You said quietly.

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea right now.” He answered. There was an attempt at sincerity in his voice.

“If I don’t, then he’s gonna be sent away and he won’t know that I’m okay… Please, Dex. He’s my friend.”

“Alright.” He sighed. “I’ll see what I can do.”

Once he left, the bedside phone rang.

“Hello?” You answered cautiously.

“Hey there, sugar cube.” A familiar voice said on the other side, one that drew an almost immediate smile.

“That’s a nickname from a children’s show.” You laughed.

“A fantastic children’s show that you just refuse to watch.”

“If you say so, Wade.” You shrugged with a laugh. “How’d you know I was here?”

“Oh, I know everything about you.” He reasoned. “But what I don’t know is what the hell are you out here dying for?”

“Nothing.” You said innocently.

“Right, and I’m a fluffy pink unicorn that can crap diamonds and barf glitter… Come on. Spill. What made you go rogue?”

“The guy lied and wanted to kill my friend.”

“And where was Ye Olde Devil Friend?”

“Dead.”

He gasped dramatically and you chuckled a bit. “I’m sososososo sorry! You okay?”

“I’m working through it.” You said honestly. “In between caring too much and not caring at all.”

“I’ve gotta run because your guy friend’s coming back - which you need to explain that. I can see what you’re into but he also seems like he’s a chicken nugget short of a happy meal if you know what I’m saying… But call me if you need anything, alright? To talk, to cry, to run around town and stab some sickos, make friendship bracelets, vandalize someone’s car. Whatever it is, I’m there for you. Okay, pookie bear?”

“Never call me that again.” You laughed. “Thanks, Wade.. Hang on. How do you knew Dex is-“

“Okay, byyyyeeee!!”

The phone call ended and you sat in quiet shock for a moment. You shrugged it off as part of Wade’s usual antics and replaced the phone. You shifted to get comfortable on the bed when your rib reignited, sending a fresh burn of pain through your side.

“Может быть, булавки были бы хорошей идеей.” You muttered to yourself. (Maybe the pins would’ve been a good idea.)

“Hey, Princess.” Frank’s voice stole your attention.

You smiled widely as he came and sat on the edge of the bed. The action pulled on your busted lip and scraped jaw but you ignored the openings. “Look like hell.”

“Yeah.” You agreed with a small laugh. “Yeah, he sure didn’t take it easy on me.”

“Bet you wish you had listened to me now, huh?” He gently lifted your shot wrist. “How bad’s this?”

“Permanent nerve damage and shattered small bones. Doctor says I’ll need a brace and it could hurt for the rest of my life.”

He set your hand down carefully and kept a gentle hold on your fingers instead. You returned the hold as best you could, despite the pain that shot ups from the small movement.

“Just like that rib, huh?” He tried to joke.

“Had to make it a pair, y’know?” You joked in return.

“They fill you in on Russo yet?”

“Yeah, that he’s basically a vegetable right now and may or may not be worth anything ever again... I want him to remember. I want him to see me and now that I helped do that to him. And I want him to know he deserved it.”

“You really do got a mean streak.” He chuckled.

“They also told me about your help being omitted from the final narrative.”

He hummed in agreement.

“You know where you’re gonna go?”

“Anywhere, I guess.” He shrugged. “But I didn’t wanna go anywhere till I knew you’d be alright.”

“Honestly, Frank, I don’t think I’ll ever really be alright again… Not even physically but mentally. Losing Matt messed with my head and when I was right on that cusp of dying, I saw him. He practically begged me to go with him.”

“Y/N, you did die for about a minute.” Frank said gently.

“I did?”

“Yeah, your heart stopped. Blood loss, they said. Your partner was able to get you started again but it was one of the worst minutes of my life, y’know. You’re family, like a sister. And if I… If I had lost you at that carousel, Jesus, I would’ve…”

“I’m sorry.” You said honestly. “I didn’t think about it that way until it was almost too late.”

“Yeah, I could hear it in your voice that you weren’t thinking or caring.”

“I just couldn’t take it anymore. I didn’t want to live with that anymore.”

“So why’d you decide you wanted to live?”

“I heard you.” You shrugged. “You and Dex, begging me to stay… Reminded me I’ve still got something here, I guess.”

“Good thing is that part of your heart that Murdock got to is still there.”

“Yeah, I guess.” You nodded. “Doesn’t make anything easier, though.”

“Nah. You and me don’t get easy. Easy gets boring.”

At that you laughed, which made your side hurt, but you didn’t quite care at the moment.

“I’ll get you when you’re released and take you home, alright? Get some rest. You need it.” Frank said kindly.

“Yeah, I feel like I got hit by a bus.” You agreed as he stood.

He reached forward and gently put a hand on top of your head. You smiled slightly as you understood what the gesture meant. He was grateful you were alive. He was grateful you were in his life to begin with, on his side and willing to fight right next to him. But there was also a hint of regret, like he wished you didn’t have to.

Three days later, you were able to go home. During those last few days, you gave your official statement to your bureau and your deposition regarding David’s involvement.

You went with Frank to bring David home. He asked you both to come in but you politely declined. Though as you two were pulling away, Leo came running out. She came straight to your window and knocked on it till you rolled it down. She put the familiar hourglass back in your hand, insisting you keep it for the next person you need to help. She then lifted the cuff of her sleeve to show the red drawing on the top of her wrist while she proudly said she had her own now.

You encouraged her strength and she smiled brightly, waving vigorously as you two left. It was a good thing you did, because you were tearing up at that point as you thought of how you had actually helped her.

Frank stuck around with you at Curtis’ meeting that night. He spoke about the uncertainty of what comes after war and how the silence after the gunfire was hard to live in. You understood that. Fighting beside Daredevil was your own war and once he was gone, it was quiet. Too quiet.

Frank drove you home that night and opened your car door. When you got out, you hugged him tightly. He returned the gesture, though he was more careful of your still lingering injuries.

“You’re gonna be alright, Y/N/N.” He said gently.

“I know.” You sniffled. “I’m just not looking forward to doing it alone.”

“You’re not alone. You got Karen, Nelson, Curtis, that church Murdock went to. People out here, they care about you, right? And you still got me. Anytime you need me, you call me, okay? And I will get my ass over here. I don’t give a damn what Madani or Homeland have to say about it. You got it?”

“Yeah.” You smiled slightly and stepped back. “Thanks, Frank. I know we probably won’t talk much while you’re gone but if you get yourself in trouble, you can call me, too.”

“I know.” He returned the smile. “And here.”

He handed you an envelope.

“You’re giving me money, too?” You joked and he scoffed slightly.

“Cause you need it, right?”

“I do. Rent’s not cheap, even with the billboard… Really, what is it?”

“It’s a letter, smartass. I know it’s hard, losing that one person who meant everything. And it’s not the same but for when you’re down in the dumps and are gonna go off the rails again, read it first.”

“Aw.” You gave a teasing pout. “Punisher’s gone soft.” You poked his stomach a few times while he chuckled.

“Yeah, run of the mill teddy bear over here.” He snorted a laugh. “Take care of yourself, alright? You promise me that?”

“Yeah.” You nodded. “I’ll do my best.”

[petertingle-yipyip]

WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE

five - build god then we'll talk

tags: n/a // four // six // masterlist

Pairing: Billy x Reader ; Frank x Reader

Word Count: 7,008

Summary: Temporary alliances form on one side before fighting off an ambush from the other. All the while, dots are connecting for more than one player as the game grows more and more dangerous.

“Ms. Y/L/N.” She smiled as she came into the conference room. You stood from your chair and shook her hand, noticing a slight wince as she sat across from you. “I’m sorry to have kept you waiting. I’m acting SAC Dinah Madani.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” You nodded. “I heard about the crash at the docks. I commend you for coming into the office so soon but I guess it’s no surprise as you’re the acting SAC.”

“You heard?” Her brows raised.

“Word travels fast between bureaus.”

“Ah.” She nodded. “Of course, you recently completed FBI training at Quantico. How was that?”

“It was good. I’m excited to start and get to work with my partner.”

“You have a partner already?”

“He recommended me. I wouldn’t have pursued the FBI if I hadn’t met him.”

“Sounds like a good foundation for a partnership.”

“I’m sure it will be, but I don’t think that’s what you called me in for, is it?”

“No.” She shook her head with a small smile as if she had been caught. “It’s about your previous employment.”

“Oh, Anvil!” You nodded, feigning understanding. “Of course. Billy told me about the Homeland group that came through a few days ago. He said you really stuck out.”

“Um-“

“If this is about Billy-“ You leaned your elbows on the table as if you two were high schoolers gossiping at the lunch tables. “-I say you should go for it.” You continued when you noticed she was taken by surprise. “I don’t blame you, he’s real good-looking and you’re beautiful. And, between us, the sex is good too if you’re interested in that.”

“Ms. Y/L/N.”

“You guys had good banter the other night so you should go out with him again, on a real date.”

“I’m sorry, the other night? He told you about that?”

“No, I saw you two.” Your brows furrowed as you played dumb and leaned back in your seat. “I walked right past you? …. This isn’t about Billy, is it?”

“Your employment at Nelson and Murdock, actually.”

“Oh… That feels like a lifetime ago.”

“Wasn’t too long ago.”

“A lot has changed since then.”

“Since college too, I assume.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, naturally, I looked into your academics, and may I say, you’re brilliant. Columbia Law, summa cum laude, alongside the two partners at the firm you’d later work at. Only you took some time between your senior semesters. Completed your degree online and you were able to skip internship. A near-perfect Bar score as well. Looking at it all together, it’s truly impressive.”

“Thank you.” You nodded. “Although I’m not sure why the firm is relevant. It’s disbanded. Franklin Nelson is thriving at HC&B and Matthew Murdock is on a Catholic Retreat at the Vatican.”

“Are you religious?”

“You go ahead and build God yourself then we’ll talk religion.” You scoffed. “Any God isn’t relevant here anyway, right? Considering the whole Church and State separation.”

“Hmm.” She nodded before coming around to your side of the table. “Before Columbia, there’s practically nothing. Like you didn’t exist.”

“Yes, well, my father dumped me at an orphanage overseas.”

“Your mother didn’t protect you?”

“Died when I was an infant, may she rest in peace. Hence the whole orphan thing”

“You were a ghost before law school, Ms. Y/L/N. Forgive me, Agent Y/L/N. And yet you have made quite a life for yourself.”

“What are you implying?”

“Someone intentionally wanted to keep your existence a secret… Leaves room to speculate on what you were before, but no one ever seemed to.” You saw her focus stay on your eye for a moment and you mentally cursed yourself for not having dealt with it that morning. “Yet you’ve still gotten everything you wanted out of life, didn’t you?”

“You can ask Mr. Russo about that. He can give you the gist, off the record of course. Just as I assume this entire conversation is.”

“Anvil hires ex-military.” She challenged rather than acknowledging your last comment.

“Yes.”

“You were never a soldier.”

“Correct, I never served in the US Military or any nation’s traditional military.”

“But you have some training?”

“Enough to get in at Anvil and be one of his most trusted/most consistent and earn his respect from the first time I met him. But with all due respect, Agent Madani, what does this have to do with Nelson and Murdock?”

“You’re an interesting woman, Agent Y/L/N.”

“Yes, you’ve said that.” You said sharply. “Please make your point, Madani, or I’m leaving.”

“I just wonder why you’d throw away such a promising career on the Castle case.”

“And this conversation makes me wonder why you’d want to disturb a dead man.”

“I’ve read through the transcripts and you were a real powerhouse in that courtroom. You were a fierce advocate for the man. Your work ethic is rather admirable.”

“It was my idea to take the case in the first place. It was only right to give it my best.”

“Why take it at all? I’m sure the partners didn’t agree.”

“Not at first.” You agreed. “But it wasn’t supposed to go to trial. Our plan was to negotiate a better plea deal but Frank had other plans. Why is any of this relevant?”

“What interested me the most was the testimony of the medical examiner that got thrown out.” She flipped open her folder and trailed her finger down the page as if she was searching for something before tapping the page a few times.

“And how do you know about that?”

“Transcripts.”

“The testimony was stricken from official record.”

“Public record, maybe. A case that major would’ve had everything available to departments like mine or yours, if you talk to the right people.  What stood out to me was the woman he mentioned, wearing a mask with an accent. The woman Mr. Tepper said coerced him into his confession.”

Elektra. Even in death, she haunted you. Same way Matt did.

“Yes.” You nodded as the Midland explosion rumbled deep in your chest when she shut the folder. “But the defense had nothing to do with that. To this day we have no idea who that woman was nor do any of us care at this point. We’ve moved on.”

“Would it be fair to assume it was a local vigilante? I’ve heard there’s one who fits that description, worked alongside Daredevil - who you know well - and even did a short stint with the Punisher.”

“Excalibur. No wait, that’s the sword.. Was it Extremis?”

“Exodus.” She corrected.

“Right! I don’t know, I heard she died.”

“Did you know her?”

“Allegedly.” You shrugged.

“And how exactly does that work?”

“The last time I saw either of them alive, they came to me and said there was some organization targeting their loved ones. They made it seem like they knew me without their suits but never said their names. Then they fought their fight and everyone else that was hiding out with me had their friends come back but those two never did… Nothing was ever uncovered from the rubble either.”

“Rubble?” Her head tilted slightly.

“Some building went down a few months ago. I’m sorry, but I’m still lost. I don’t understand what you’re asking me.”

“Why advocate for Frank Castle at all? And if Exodus was your friend, why throw her to the wolves in the trial?”

“Are we still off the record?”

“Of course.” She gestured to the lack of cameras in the room.

“Frank Castle was the victim of a sting operation gone back. When DA Reyes was in office, she planned to catch the Blacksmith, who turned out to be his old C.O., at Central Park. Only she neglected to - Actually, she opted to not clear civilians, which ended with Lisa, Maria, and Frankie Castle being shot dead on what was supposed to be a celebratory outing. Frank Castle endured a tragedy, Agent Madani. Now it’s not justification for a full-blown killing spree across my neighborhood but it’s some sort of explanation as to why he was so goddamned angry.”

“And are you angry, Agent Y/L/N?” She asked carefully.

“Yeah, I am.” You said after a minute of contemplation. “I’m angry that he’s gone. I’m angry that my firm fell apart. And I’m angry that I’m here, digging up stories on a dead man that I let down.”

The heat that lived in your veins rose and you felt it burning through your skin. You had to take a few steadying breaths to force it back where it belonged.

“I’m sorry to have upset you.” She offered, and there was an attempt at sincerity, but you could tell it was learned. Forced, even. “I didn’t know it was so important to you.”

“At Columbia and Quantico - They probably talk about it at the FLETC too, body language. Facial expressions. Inflections in people’s voices. Helps to figure out if someone’s lying and whether you can trust the words they’re saying. Almost everybody has a tell and I see one from you when you talk about Frank Castle. Like a kid in a candy store, just waiting to hear the right words from her parents…  What words are you hoping to hear, Agent Madani?”

“Did he ever tell you about his time in Afghanistan? Specifically Kandahar.” She asked finally and you had to keep your smirk to yourself. For an acting SAC, she was easy enough to work. “I was in Kandahar myself before this. Turns out Frank Castle might’ve been the man I needed to talk to.”

“What’s important about Kandahar?”

“Do you know anything?”

“Depends on what you’re looking for.”

“Ahmed Zubhair, a man I worked with. Tortured and executed by his unit. Tell me, what kind of man was Frank Castle?”

“Decent. Angry, but honest. I had nothing to fear from him. He treated me with respect and I did the same. And I regret how I let him down… If Kandahar is something that could’ve had something to do with what happened to Frank’s family, I’ll see what I can find.”

“I can’t ask you to do that.” She shook her head slightly. “I doubt your SAC at the FBI will let you open a case based on intuition and a personal stake.”

“You’re not asking.” You said simply. “When you talk to Billy about me, which I know you will, I’m sure he can fill you in on some of my capabilities outside of my bureau… If his old C.O. was behind Central Park because of Kandahar, I owe it to him and his family to find out why and find out who pulled Schoonover’s strings.”

“You think there was someone above him?” Her eyes lit up.

“Operation Cerberus wasn’t forgotten in the records.” You clarified. “It had to be on purpose. Someone kept it off. And that leaves room to speculate, remember?”

“Do you have any leads?”

“I will. I was a ghost before Columbia for good reason. Oh, and feel free to call if you need any sort of freelance in your investigation.”

“Off the record?”

“It’s how I do my best work. Enjoy your speculation in the meantime.” You shrugged with a small smile as you stood and she gave you a slight smirk and a nod.

You and Madani would likely not find yourselves being friends by the end of your endeavors. Her mission ran counter to your own, though slight parallels existed. By seemingly agreeing to get her information about Kandahar, it allowed you a certain leeway regarding your own business. She wouldn’t be keeping a watchful eye over you so long as she believed you were on her side. And by planting the ideas of Billy’s knowledge of your past, you knew that it would create a direct line as to what she was asking and what she was being told.

The only way you would’ve crafted the situation any better would be if she was running solely on speculation and didn’t know Frank was alive. But you saw it in her eyes, that spark of a reignited passion project. Just days before she, like the rest of the world, knew Frank Castle to be dead. But now having seen his face, heard his voice, she couldn’t believe that ruse any longer. And that knowledge just might be the bump in your otherwise unobstructed path.

Before heading back to Lieberman’s hideout, you stopped back at your apartment. You pulled your gym bag from your room and dumped the contents across your bed. You took it over to the locked closet and took a deep breath, noticing your hand was shaking as you reached for the lock. You forced the hesitation to that familiar gap in your chest and opened it to reveal your bloodied clump of material, your case, and Matt’s case - kicked into the back corner.

You went straight for yours and dug through until you found what you were looking for, one of your very first suits. One before the alterations and additional protections. One that had the bright red emblem of the Red Room still embedded at the neck. It was a suit designed from a time before you were a vigilante before Exodus was ever created. It was born before Y/N had her own identity, before she met Matt and Foggy. The suit was created for the nameless, faceless Widow. The spy, the child raised to be an assassin. One that was good at it and hated herself for it. The suit was what your father traded his daughter for. The suit killed the little girl your mother gave birth to, erased her name, just to put a knife in one hand and a gun in the other. The suit, what it truly stood for, might’ve been all that was left for you.

You shoved it into the bag with a set of Bites, your other mask last used at Midland, boots, belt packed with all your usual tricks, and two handguns with an additional clip for each. You paused at your two torso protections, the recent vest newly adorned with scratches or the original long-sleeve top that was a gift from Matt before your first fight with Fisk. Neither felt right so you threw them both to the side. You tossed it on the table before rummaging around the kitchen to put together a few sets of to-go meals. Whether or not Frank had pissed you off, it was going to be a long drive so you made quick burritos and wrapped them up before placing them in the bag, along with your car charger for your phone. You grabbed a couple of waters and sodas, even threw in a couple of energy drinks for good measure, before heading over.

“Oh.” Lieberman said as you approached the two stocking the van. “I didn’t think you were coming.”

“I started something. I need to see it through.” You answered. “So are we doing this or what?”

Frank made a small noise in agreement and nodded for you to get in. He moved over to the driver's side and Lieberman offered you the passenger. You shook your head and dropped your bag into the back before you climbed up, yanking the doors shut behind you.

You were quiet for most of the drive, trying to drown out Lieberman’s blabbering about anything and everything. You laid out on your back and saw a message from Billy asking you to call him. You sat up quickly and turned to see the guys were now talking about the root of the word Cerberus. You scooted to the far corner and dialed the number, taking one more glance to ensure no one was paying attention to you.

“Hey, Pretty Lady. How you feeling today?” He asked when he answered and you noticed you almost smiled.

“Uh, yeah, I’m doing fine.” You answered quietly, though your voice earned a questioning look from Frank in the rearview. You just waved him off and he rolled his eyes. “What’s going on?”

“I wanted to see how you were feeling cause I just had something come across my desk that I thought you might wanna head up.”

“Okay, shoot.”

“Thing is, it’s an out-of-town job.”

“Since when do you take those on?”

“Since it’s an old friend.” You knew he would’ve shrugged with a little head tilt. “He’s got some property in Kentucky he needs to clear out.”

“Sounds like a job for the Sheriff’s department out there, not you.”

“Look, he came to me so I’m assuming he tried all that.”

“Assuming…” You nodded to yourself. “So you didn’t bother to ask?”

He sighed slightly and you pictured the face he was making. Things with Billy were getting too familiar, too predictable. That small patch of vulnerability on your heart liked it and wanted to keep it, but the hardened reality urged you to push away.

“I guess it doesn’t matter. If it was a little closer, I’d do it but I’m not trying to go that far right now.” You said simply, which was true. You didn’t want to go to Kentucky but that’s where the job took you.

“Hey, not a problem.” He answered, no doubt with a smile. “I just had to offer it to my best girl.”

“As if there was anyone else. You gonna take it instead?”

“No, I’ll just let the guys run it themselves. I can’t get away right now.”

You nodded to yourself in slight relief, knowing you wouldn’t have to worry about him showing up out of the blue and being a problem. It did interest you a bit more as to who would be able to pull Schoonover’s strings and get to Billy. You knew it had to be Agent Orange but it did nothing to answer who the hell that man was.

“You still there?” He asked and you realized you had been quiet for too long.

“Yeah, sorry. Just thinking.” You admitted. “I gotta go, alright? I got some work I gotta get started on.”

“No worries. Take care of yourself for me, yeah?”

“Mhmm.. Bye.”

“The hell was all that?” Frank asked as soon as you had set your phone in your lap. You pulled your knees up and blew out a sigh, pushing your hands through your hair. You glanced over and saw him looking between the road and you from the rearview. You simply shrugged and scooted to be closer to them.

You leaned between the seats and saw Lieberman pass Frank a packet of tuna, at which you made a face. You were wildly confused as to why he would bring something so cheap and seeing Lieberman pull out a full sub made it worse for you. The meal choice confused Frank as well, and you had to laugh at the response from them both.

“Where’d you get that?” Frank asked in bewilderment, almost jealous as well.

“I made it.” He answered honestly.

“What do you mean, you made it?”

“Yeah... This stuff was in the fridge.”

“You make me one?”

“No... No, I thought you liked that stuff.”

You reached between them and grabbed the tuna out of Frank’s hand. Before he could complain, you replaced it with one of the burritos from your bag. He looked between the new food and you before he nodded in thanks. You offered a small smile and then dropped a water bottle into the cup holder. Lieberman looked between you and Frank with a clear question in his eyes, though if you had to guess what he was wondering, you’d have a list a mile long.

You knew how odd your dynamic with Frank would seem from the outside, both within and outside the law. As vigilantes, you two were partners who held each other in a certain respect. It was similar to you and Daredevil but with more aligned viewpoints. As regular people, you two were allegedly just a lawyer and her client, hardly friends or even acquaintances. So when looking at the way you two would interact, ensuring the other was alive and taking care of each other, it was something to question. How did you two get so close? Why were you two the seemingly only exception for the other? And realistically, there was no real answer other than you were too stubborn to let Frank, or the Punisher for that matter, do something stupid in your neighborhood alone.

Maybe it started as damage control or a way to piss off Matt and Daredevil, but it grew into a real friendship. A real partnership. It grew to be equivalent to family.

Lieberman talked some more during the drive, most of which you tuned out. Instead, you ate your food and rubbed the temple of your red eye with the intent of clearing it away. You almost felt the repair and you pictured it like using a squeegee on a window or using a magnet to play with flecks of iron. As your fingers moved in small circles, the redness would follow like a little trail until it diluted away.

You took a short nap on the drive as well before you all arrived. You ensured to kick the guys out before you changed into your suit. As you unfolded the material, your retractable fell into your lap. You hadn’t even realized you had grabbed it but there it was, tangled in the fabric of your suit and still caked in the blood of the Hand. You thought for a moment if you had done it on purpose but at that point, you didn’t think it mattered so you slipped it onto your wrist. Fitting all of your equipment into place felt like you were fixing the puzzle pieces of your life, replacing what seemingly always should’ve been. As you were finishing, you wondered absently if your bones had reshaped to allow the perfect little niches for your Bites and mask.

“I don’t wanna hear from you unless you hear from me, got it?” Frank warned as he took the walkie from Lieberman and you came around the van.

“Turn it on.” You nodded as your finger slid to your scar. The device beeped in your ear and you kept a light pressure as you shifted along until the static died and you were in the loop. “Got it, thanks.”

“Stay in the van.” He pointed to Lieberman before he began climbing the fence. “No getting your hands dirty this time.”

“Or trying to get someone killed.” You muttered as you hauled yourself over. You tapped your mask upon landing and followed behind Frank.

You were thinking about telling him that you had a theory an Anvil team would be sent in, but there was no good way to explain it. Explaining how you knew meant you had to explain your relationship with Billy, which meant he would connect the dots that you were sleeping with one of his closest friends, and that may or may not go over well. So you kept your mouth shut about it but your head remained on a swivel. You listened for anything that would cut into your communications with Lieberman or anything unusual through your lenses.

Your walk to the cabin was mostly clear - and unsettlingly quiet - save for the lone trip wire. When you two got to the small cabin, Frank began to rid himself of his backpack and gun. He gestured for you to do the same but you hesitated. You didn’t like the idea of being defenseless against whatever team Billy was sending your way. You knew you would have to kill them first, and the team likely would’ve expected to die or at least fight, so you didn’t necessarily feel bad about what was going to happen. But you did feel a little guilty for keeping it to yourself, for no other reason than to keep Billy your little secret.

With a small sigh, you untucked your guns and set them with Frank’s. You took the blade out of your belt as well, but you slipped a finger around your wrist and found the retractable blade was in its position. With your Bites and that, you should be fine to get back to your gun. You turned to Frank and put your hands up in slight surrender, to which he gestured to your wrists. You simply shook your head and moved back to his side.

You were adjusting your lens to see further when it picked up the faint outline of a figure far off. You tried to make it clearer and you could see the shape of a weapon. Your brows furrowed as you stared when you realized it was a bow and arrow. You grabbed Frank’s sleeve to move him but the arrow pierced him before you could. A secondary arrow zipped by and dragged across your chest, slicing a shallow gash from one collarbone to the other, taking a chunk of your shoulder with it.

You shoved him behind one of the bigger trees before you gripped the arrow with one hand and braced his shoulder with the other. He groaned in pain but ultimately nodded for you to do it. You yanked hard and the arrow snapped. He yelled loudly and you looked over your shoulder to see the figure was aiming at you two again. You cursed to yourself, grabbed the front of Frank’s jacket, and yanked him to the side. As you two were moving, the arrow came whizzing past your shoulder and buried itself at what you assumed would’ve been the center of your back.

“Gunner, goddamit, it’s Frank Castle.” Frank tried again after ducking behind another tree. You peeked around and saw Gunner coming closer, setting sights on you two again. You looked at Frank for confirmation but he held steady. You would just have to trust him.

“Come on. I’m not a part of it, brother. I never have been.” He continued.

You watched carefully and felt his slight hesitation. Despite it all, he still trusted Frank. And you could use that. You pulled that to the forefront, allowing that trust to be his focus. You also projected Frank’s trust in you and the two began to meld easily enough. You couldn’t completely beat the suspicion so you didn’t try to. You just had to make sure he didn’t fire another arrow because you weren’t gonna be able to dodge it.

“Сукин сын.” You said to yourself before stepping around the tree with your hands up in surrender. (Son of a bitch.)

“I know you don’t know me and you have no reason to trust me.” You said simply as you dropped to your knees, hands still raised as his arrow set a course to the center of your chest. If you said one wrong thing, you’d be dead. “A woman in a black suit and a mask shows up out of the blue, I wouldn’t trust me either if I were you.”

“The hell are you doing?” Frank asked in a hushed tone as he got to your side, falling into the same position you were in.

“Trying something.” You answered before returning your focus to Gunner. “You don’t have to trust me, but I’m willing to bet you trust him… And he wouldn’t bring me if I wasn’t on his side. That’s gotta be worth something.”

Gunner looked between you and Frank, an uncertainty in his eyes but his hands never faltered as Frank gave a quick explanation of what brought you two there. The arrow was still on course for your chest and you could picture how quick it would come, if it would be the same as feeling Elektra’s weapon in your dream. But the piercing never came. Instead, you heard the sound of the arrow relaxing and footsteps coming closer.

You helped Gunner get Frank to lean against one of the trees.

“I’m sorry about your family.” Gunner said honestly and you kept glancing around, anxiously awaiting for the figures to reveal themselves in your lenses.

“Agent Orange.” You said simply. “You know anything about who he is? Maybe a name.”

“No.” Gunner answered.

“So why’d you do it, man? Why’d you… Why’d you make the tape?” Frank asked and while Gunner explained it, you focused on your belt. You found the gauze you kept and unrolled some to pack his wound. You gently reached under his jacket and carefully stuffed the hole with the tissue when Gunner’s words stole your attention and your hands froze.

“They were putting bags of drugs in his body.” He explained.

“That’s why he was never caught.” You realized. “When she was first trying to catch him, the DA at the time didn’t know how he was getting that much product into the country… I never would’ve guessed.”

“Treated him like an empty carcass.” Gunner continued and he was both disgusted and heartbroken over it. “Jim and all the rest of them in there.”

“Who was it?” You continued when you noticed Frank was growing tense. “Who was in the room, Gunner?”

“The colonel, Bennett - the guy who ran the mortuary - and Orange… I didn’t know who was in on it. I didn’t know who I could trust.”

You heard the feedback before you saw them. When the high-pitched sound rang in your ears, you spun behind you to see the incoming helicopter.

“We gotta go.” You said quickly, adjusting your lens to try and see further. “Now.”

“They with you?” Gunner asked as he hauled Frank to his feet.

“Shit, no.” He answered. “Y/N, who are they?”

“A problem.” You muttered and saw the row of soldiers coming your way. “They’ve got body cams, live feedback but I can’t figure out where it’s going.”

“Time to go to work.” Frank told you, offering a small nod to you. You returned the gesture and peeled away from the group, habitually reaching for a gun, only to come up empty.

You cursed quietly when you remembered that you had ditched them back near the cabin as a show of allegiance. You sighed quietly and armed your Bites while you ducked behind a fallen tree trunk. While remaining hidden, you scanned the area to see a trio coming your way. You noted the rifles in each of their hands as they stayed on alert as they crept forward. You had to acknowledge that they had the weaponry advantage but you had the element of surprise. And you were rather resourceful.

When the first one landed in front of you, you hooked one foot around his ankle and slammed the other into the side of his knee. There was a sick ripping sound as he collapsed with a loud scream. You moved quickly to cover his mouth with your knee and the more weight you leaned onto him, you began to hear a crunch and you weren’t sure if it was the branches beneath you or his jaw.

You saw the knife handle at the soldier’s belt so you snatched it quickly. First, you slammed the butt end against the body cam and the lens shattered, but your mask told you it was still functioning. You shrugged it off and raised your arm in anticipation of the next soldier. When he finally showed, you flicked the blade quickly and it buried itself at the base of his throat and a deep red stream of blood shot out. Instincively you closed your eyes and the warm liquid splattered across your cheek and mask. You wiped it away quickly and noticed the soldier beneath you had stopped squirming.

You climbed off and removed his rifle, slinging the weapon over your own shoulder before leaning closer to the body cam.

“Наслаждаетесь шоу?” You said lowly, seeing the red light blink to show that it was currently being watched from the other end. “Не волнуйся.” You smiled slightly as that thick stream of blood trailed down. “Мы тоже придем за тобой.” (Enjoying the show? Don’t worry. We’ll come for you, too.)

You heard the crunch of footsteps against the leaves and lifted the gun quickly. You lined your shot and as soon as the third soldier faced you, you fired straight through his eyeball and he fell limp immediately. You pushed yourself up, nudging the first soldier with your foot and getting no response. You gave a small, indifferent shrug before you began searching for Frank and Gunner. There was a sharp whistle and you saw the man waving you over.

You took your position next to Frank, Gunner stationed on the opposite side, and you three began firing against the next wave from the team. You and Frank alternated shots, popping out from your covers for seconds at a time to take someone down. Gunner leaned over to fire an arrow and you heard the shout. You glanced over and saw a second shot pierce his chest.

“I got it.” You said quickly, drawing Frank’s attention. You nodded towards Gunner before you two switched positions, allowing Frank to go to his friend. Though Frank was stubborn and refused to stay down, which got him shot in the side. “Get some cover. I’ll find you.”

You nudged him aside with your shoulder and jumped over the fallen tree, landing in a low crouch as the shots hit the tree. You kept your head down until the bullets paused and you fired back, hearing two different voices shouting. You surveyed the area quickly and saw two more coming at you, hopping over a log not too far away from you.

You hurried to your feet and got behind a tree, lining the weapon with your body to keep it hidden. You flicked out the blade at your wrist and looked over to see neither soldier had noted your position. Either that or they didn’t care. Regardless, it worked in your favor. You crept behind the one closest to you and jammed the knife through the side of his neck, the other hand covering his mouth to hide his gurgled shout. 

You lowered him carefully to the ground and yanked your blade out, freeing your bloodied hand. Looking down at it, you saw the stream of blood coming from your own shoulder. You glanced at your chest and saw the long line across it. The sight made you groan slightly but you made a mental note to deal with it later.

You moved after the other from the pair, careful to match your steps to his. When you were close enough, you jammed the short blade through his back and heard the squelching sound of his now severed spine. You twisted and pulled out, letting his body fall unceremoniously to the ground. You knelt to take the knife from his belt and heard Lieberman giving Frank directions.

You heard small shouts as Frank and Gunner dealt with the pair that was closest, and you used your lens to see the secondary pair that Lieberman was referring to. You made your way to your friend quickly and Frank’s hand closed around your arm to bring you with him. Despite your mild pulling away, Frank dragged you along.

Once there was enough space, Frank gestured for you to try and help Gunner. Gunner leaned against a fallen tree and Frank took position with the rifle. You knelt beside his friend and inspected the wound, though you weren’t sure if you would’ve rather found an exit wound or not. Two quick shots sounded, followed by the thud of limp bodies. Given what you had already taken out, there should be only one pair left.

Frank helped you get Gunner to his feet and you moved ahead of them. Gunner muttered something about you and where Frank found you but you kept your focus forward. Your mask picked up the drone above, which showed the same origination as the comms channel, so you trusted it. You led your trio around the last pair until you were able to watch them pass you. Once they did, you felt their anxiety.

They must’ve known their team was being picked off, one by one. They had walked into a slaughter, though they expected to be the ones ambushing. Their small team, likely even friends, were being left in pools of their own blood, by three figures in the shadows. They didn’t know who they were facing, but they knew their opposition was better. You, Frank, and Gunner were better than them, despite their likely elite or at least high-ranking status. But something about them, their vibrating hesitation and drumline for heartbeats, led you to wonder if it was actually an Anvil team.

But if it wasn’t, why would Billy bring it up to you?

You realized quickly that something wasn’t adding up the way it should and it led you to some tricky speculations that Billy was still in contact with Agent Orange. While it would be an overall useful connection, it did seem to disappoint you a bit. You made a small noise of disgust to yourself before raising your Bite, the bright red glow momentarily illuminating your vision.

You fired on one of the last pair before disappearing out of sight, just before the bullets came in. The man fired aimlessly, shouting his plan to kill you. You scoffed quietly and threw the borrowed knife, watching it bury itself into the man’s leg. He cried out before Frank grabbed him and slammed his own blade into the man’s throat.

Once he fell limp, you two retrieved Gunner and attempted to get him back to his cabin.

The walk felt like an eternity and you knew - Gunner knew it too - that Frank’s friend wouldn’t make it. The two collapsed against one of the trunks and you knelt on Gunner’s other side. You felt awkward, out of place beside a dying man you didn’t know. While they exchanged last words, Gunner reached out and took one of your hands. Your brows furrowed and your first thought was to pull away, but you decided quickly that you could offer comfort to a man who was now dying after fighting beside you.

Maybe you really were a curse.

“Promise me you’ll bury me, okay?” Gunner managed and the words were as desperate as they could be.

“Okay.” Frank answered, looking over at you for the same commitment.

“Yeah.” You nodded. “Just stay here, okay? We’ll be back.”

“We’ll be back.” Frank repeated.

You two stood and you were quick to recognize that Frank wouldn’t make it very far. You cursed quietly as you caught him just before he fell over. 

“Goddammit, Frank.” You complained as he leaned more of his weight on you. “You don’t get to die on me in the middle of fucking Kentucky.”

You reached up and pressed on your scar.

“I can’t get him back on my own.” You said quickly, carefully lowering him to the ground. “Get your ass over here, now.”

You yanked your mask down to hang around your neck and reached under Frank’s jacket. The gentle pressure you applied caused fresh blood to bubble out and coat your hand. Your other hand patted your belt and the gauze you kept wasn’t enough. It wouldn’t be able to pack the wound enough to be of real help. It was too dark to fully see the extent of the damage and the leaves and branches around were going to do you no favors.

You had two choices. Wait for Lieberman to show up - assuming he would be able to find you two - or leave Frank to find Lieberman and bring him back. The second option was contingent on you being able to find your own way back in the dark so you decided you wouldn’t move. You wouldn’t abandon the one friend you hadn’t been able to push away.

Using your teeth, you pulled off a glove and allowed your exposed hand to cover the wound instead. You shoved your glove into your belt and leaned more weight into Frank, feeling the thump steady against your hand. You weren’t entirely convinced it was a good thing, to feel less of his pulse, but you had to keep faith in the resiliency of Frank Castle.

If a bullet to the head wasn’t going to kill him, neither would a bullet to his side.

After you didn’t know how long, you saw Lieberman’s flashlight. He helped you load Frank into the van and offered you a small collection of items to help. He drove quickly as you worked in the back, though you had to straddle Frank in an effort to allow some stability during the trip. You carefully dressed the wound on his side and managed to insert the IV for fluids and antibiotics without problems.

“You’ll need to get Curtis Hoyle.” You explained as LIeberman drove frantically and you climbed off, reaching for your sweater from your bag.

“What? Wha- Why? What’s wrong with him?” He answered quickly, the anxiety in his words bouncing off the empty walls of the van which made you shiver as you undid the zipper down the front of your suit. You peeled the bloody material down your arms and rubbed some of the excess off with a cleaner area before pulling your sweater over your head, letting out a sharp hiss as you stretched the cut across your chest.

“I don’t know.” You answered honestly before yanking your boots off. “I’m not a doctor but could be from blood loss. Could be the beginning of an infection. Could be something bloodborne that got passed during the fight. That’s why you need to get Curtis when we get back.”

“You can’t help him?”

“I’ve done all I can, Spook.” You groaned and shimmied out of the rest of the suit to change for your regular pants.

“Is he gonna die?”

“No… He’s too stubborn.”

[petertingle-yipyip]

MAD AT GOD - MATT MURDOCK

Season Three - I’m Not Sorry

tags: @ironprincessstranger @johnmurphys-sass @dusstory @americaarse @astrobees @mayasaurus--rex @woowwwee // seven // finale // masterlist

Pairing: Matt x Reader

Word Count: 7,735

Summary: Moves and countermoves. The cat and mouse game nearly draws to a close as Nelson and Murdock reunite in a last ditch effort to finish things from the right side of the law.

Truthfully, the reveal went better than you had expected. After a few questions and a bit of yelling, Ray was willing to hear you two out. You explained about getting his wife and son out of the line of fire. Ray suggested they leave New York all together but you knew Fisk would be watching all airports and seaports. You were going to offer to call Natasha, see if her billionaire buddy could spare some space but Matt said he knew someone to ask.

While Matt made his call, you asked Ray to go and get Seema and Sami.

Next thing you knew, you were driving Ray and his frazzled family to your apartment. From there, Brett took them in his car while you and Matt headed upstairs. You were both quick to change into something that would catch little to no attention before rushing back into the streets.

You and Matt walked together, his cane in one hand and the other arm linked through yours. Your body was growing heavy with every step and it almost felt as Matt had to hold you up as the weight of your latest string of endeavors began settling on your shoulders, making your latest collection of wounds thump with a heavy pulse. As if he knew that - which he probably did - he gave you a gentle nudge with his elbow.

“Can I ask you something?” He said suddenly, the rhythmic glide of his cane the only other noise on the street.

“Sure.” You nodded.

“Sister Ma- My mother told me that you look at me like I hung the stars.” He began carefully, measuring your reaction. “Is that true?”

“I mean… Did you?” You tried and he chuckled. “I know you didn’t hang the stars but…” You looked up at the night sky, only able to see pinpricks of light past the yellow glow of street lamps but that was more than what you had seen in months. “They’ve always been brighter when you’re around.” You turned back to the path you were walking. “Even now… Days are warmer. Flowers smell sweeter. It’s like everything quiets down and life isn’t so bad. You know what I mean?”

“Yeah.. I think I do.” He answered softly.

“Alright, alright. Don’t get all mushy on me now.” You joked as you nudged him with your shoulder, earning another small laugh. “I thought you were this whole super dark, brooding vigilante right now.”

“I guess you bring out a better side.” He said honestly. “You bring back Matt Murdock.”

“I thought you were leaving him behind.”

“I thought so, too.”

You two met up with Foggy just as Brett was pulling up with Ray and his family. You thanked Brett’s mom as she welcomed you in and she was as kind as you could’ve expected. Brett helped the family get settled while the rest of you waited in the living room.

There was tension brewing in the bedroom as Ray and Seema talked and you felt bad. You wanted to go and help Ray explain, maybe take some of the blame so their marriage didn’t implode, but that felt like a massive overstep. It was clear that Ray loved Seema and she loved him, but that betrayal would be hard to move past. Instead, you pulled some of that tension into your chest in hopes of them having a rational conversation.

You cleared your throat once it hit you and gave Mrs. Mahoney another thanks before heading outside, claiming to need air. Matt was quick to follow but Foggy stayed behind to talk to her.

“You okay?” Matt asked, putting a hand on your back as you leaned against the bars.

“Huh? Yeah, just… Sometimes it’s harder to block stuff out, especially when I’m tired.” You explained, rubbing your eyes. “I could feel the pain and everything from Ray’s wife. I feel like some of this is my fault..”

“How could it be your fault?”

“I didn’t stop this.” You sighed and turned to lean your back against the railing so you could cross your arms. “You were right. I should’ve just made sure this didn’t happen. Now a perfectly happy marriage is gonna be destroyed because Fisk used Ray.”

“You can’t control everything, sweetheart.”

“What about Sami? That little boy looks up to his father like he lifts the sun every morning. And now, what? He loses that because of a jackass like Fisk? That’s not fair, to either of them.”

“I know.” Matt agreed softly. “But if this works, and we get Fisk put away, Ray’s family will be safe.”

“But Seema won’t trust him again.”

“You trust me?”

“What?”

“After all the lies and the stuff I’ve put you through, everything I’ve said to you recently, do you trust me?”

“With my life.”

He gave a small smile and put a hand on your elbow. “Then I think they can get through this.”

Foggy came out soon after and talked to Matt for a minute. You were glad that you two were able to convince Matt to at least try the legal route. If that fell through, you weren’t exactly sure what would happen next. But that was a bridge you would cross if you got to it.

“So what now?” Ray sighed as he met you guys outside.

“You’re gonna testify against Fisk, after you hire them to represent you.” You answered.

“Represent me?” Ray questioned at the same time Foggy said “Them?”

“Rahul Nadeem, meet the brilliant minds behind Nelson and Murdock, attorneys at law.” You gestured to the boys.

“I thought your old firm packed it up.”

“Everyone loves a comeback story.”

“I don’t know about this, Y/L/N.”

“These two are the best attorneys I know. You’re in good hands.”

“What about you? How do you fit into everything?”

“I can serve as an additional testimony or a character witness, but I’m pretty sure there’s a conflict of interest card to be pulled if I help represent you while still at the bureau. Even for me, there’s limits to what I can get away with.”

“You’re not leaving?”

“Not yet, at least. With Dex still after us, I need to keep an eye on him. There’s no need for guessing what he does or doesn’t know if I can stay close enough.”

“Smart.” He nodded.

“She’s always been the brains of this trio.” Foggy threw an arm over your shoulders. “We won't let you down, Ray.”

“You, Seema, Sami.” You agreed. “We’re gonna do everything we can to help your family.”

“I know… Thank you, Y/N.”

Early the next morning, you and Matt brought Ray to Fogwell’s.

“This is where you went?” You asked him as you walked in, already seeing Karen in there. She gave you a small smile and you waved slightly.

“Nobody knows about this place. We’ll be safe here.” Matt shrugged and headed to the back room.

You patted Ray on the shoulder and gestured to the table Karen was set up at before following Matt down the short hall.

“You alright?” He asked without turning to face you.

“Yeah, just tired.” You leaned back against the wall.  “And those two don’t like each other very much so..” You gave a small smile.

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t wanna.” He offered, putting his hands on your arms. 

“Yeah I do.” You sighed and grabbed onto the material of his shirt. “For a second, can we just… take a moment? Forget about everything out there and between us and just…”

He smiled softly and stepped closer, moving one hand to the side of your head. He leaned down and pressed his forehead gently against yours. You took a deep breath and let go of his shirt so you could wrap your arms around his waist. Your head dropped to his shoulder and he chuckled slightly as he put a hand to the back of your head. His other hand was on your lower back as he pressed a gentle kiss to the side of your head.

As Matt held her close, very few things plagued his mind. Most of them were what he noticed about her. The tension in her muscles. The thrum of her pulse. The rise and fall of her chest. The way her arms were locked together, as if to keep him with her. He wondered how he could ever be so stupid as to walk away from her.

The other thoughts that he could put to words were small, selfish prayers. He prayed that there’d be more to their story, that it was a new first page rather than where it would end. He knew his thoughts echoed her name since he realized he was alive, every day until he saw her again. And then even more after. He left her too soon. He always knew that, whether he’d admit it or not. And now, as she was clinging to him like she was drowning and he was her lifeboat, he prayed that she wasn’t truly in love with someone else. That no one else was waiting for her. 

After taking a minute to enjoy each other’s company and take a breath, you two headed back into the main room. Karen and Ray were wrapping up their previous conversation, punctuating the tension in the room as Matt began talking about getting Ray’s family out of town.

“We were thinking overseas, maybe a friend or a distant relative.” Karen offered tightly, almost instantly snapping into focus.

“My brother’s wife has a cousin in Bihar.” Ray nodded. “I never liked him.”

“I can get them on a flight as early as tonight.” You said plainly. “But I’m guessing Fisk is watching the airports for exactly this so they’d have to fly outta Montreal, but a car is just as easy to get.”

“They’ll be watching my bank accounts.” Ray tried.

“We’ll cover it.” Matt promised and you nodded with a gentle, reassuring smile. You pulled your phone and messaged your old friend Rick, telling him you needed some help.

“Thanks.. But it might be more than I deserve.”

“Look, you… you hurt people.” Karen answered. “But it doesn’t define you.” She took a glance towards you.

“I’ve done worse than you have, believe me.” You offered honestly. “If I can have my life, so can you, Ray.”

Your phone rang in your hands as Matt sent Ray off. You stepped to the far corner and answered, turning your back to your friends as the conversation started.

“Long time, Y/N.” Rick said happily.

“Hasn’t been that long.. I had you help get someone out not too long ago.”

“No, Natasha called me for that.”

“Yeah, but it was for me so potato tomato.”

“I don’t think that’s how it goes.”

“But you knew what I meant.”

“Yeah, yeah. So what do you need this time?”

“Trip to Bihar for a mom and her son.”

He let out a long sigh. “Bihar, huh?”

“But they can’t fly out from New York, so I’ll need a car to Montreal.”

“And a car out of the country? Y/N, this one’ll probably clear out your tab and then some.”

“Yeah, well, if it doesn’t, can you cash out the rest and give it to them?”

“Why are these people important to you?”

“Since when do you ask questions?”

He chuckled slightly. “Tell you what, I still have that little buried airstrip outside New York. They can fly with a friend of mine from there so it’s cheaper and I’ll cover the car.”

“Look at you, going soft.” You teased. “How much does that leave for them?”

“Somewhere around $600.”

“Can you make it $850 and I'll send a check for the rest?”

“I can give them $800 and call it even.”

“You’re the best, Rick. Thank you.”

“I’ll call you when it’s ready. Where am I getting them from?”

“I’ll get you the address when you need it.”

“Seriously?”

“With what I’m getting them away from, I can’t take any chances. It’s nothing personal.”

“Still all business, eh?” He joked and you frowned to yourself. “No worries, Y/N.  We’ll talk soon. And hey?”

“Yeah?”

“Call your cousin.”

“Goodbye, Rick.”

“I’m serious!”

“I know.” You laughed before ending the call and heading back to the table.

You sat beside Matt as Karen stepped out and he turned towards you. He put a hand on your leg and you leaned your head against his shoulder. He huffed a small chuckle before giving your leg a pat. He stood to go change, leaving you in the small room alone. You let out a deep sigh and wondered how you had gotten to that point.

How were you pitted against Fisk again? How had he swooped your partner right out from under you? How had your vigilante persona been dangled over your head as leverage? How was your career at the FBI suddenly dirtier than any work you did for Dreykov?

Maybe your life was going exactly as it was supposed to. Or maybe something diverted it so far off track that it would be nothing but chaos from here on out.

Maybe you should’ve just taken Homeland’s offers to disappear after the carousel.

Ray came back in during your quiet contemplation and paced the small room. Your eyes glanced up, only for a moment, before reverting your soft gaze to the table.

“Can I ask you something?” Ray said tentatively.

“Is it about Exodus?” Your brows raised as you faced him again. You saw the man had stopped walking and was now facing you, fidgeting with his fingers. The uncertainty radiated off him so you gave a small, reassuring smile and waved for him to go ahead.

“How did Dex know? About you?”

“When we got into his apartment, after you left, Matt and I were heading to the roof. Dex threw a piece of glass and it cut the band for my mask. When I grabbed it, he saw me.”

“Did he tell Fisk?”

You chuckled slightly before letting out a loud sigh of amusement. “No.. Fisk already knew. He was trying to intimidate me into working for him by using that secret against me, but Dex was easier to manipulate.”

“Is it true that you can get into peoples heads?”

“I’m not a telepath.” You shook your head. “I’m tele-empathetic. I can read and manipulate emotions.”

“Oh…”

“Speaking of which.” You said as you pulled yourself to sit straighter as Matt came back in and sat at the edge of the boxing ring. “You need to relax a little.” You waved a hand to clear Ray’s nervousness. “Tower’s gonna eat you alive if you don’t get it together.”

“I loved my job.” He reasoned “And I loved being the good guy. I want to be on the right side of the line again.”

“You didn’t love it enough to stop Fisk.” Matt laughed.

“Matt.” You warned as he hopped down and nodded towards Ray.

“Fisk knows how to make people vulnerable. He got my sister-in-law’s health insurance canceled, left my family with bills to pay. Bills that I had to-“

“So you take out a loan, you sell your house, you figure it out. You don’t allow yourself to become an accessory.”

“It wasn’t that easy-“ Ray tried as you argued, “He can’t just sell his house when he has his son to think about!”

“You backed his play, Ray. You moved him into his hotel. You even gave him his toys back, gave him a new one too.”

“He was giving us information that saved lives.”

“Yeah, while he was taking lives. While he was taking over the city.”

“What the hell are you doing?” You grabbed Matt’s arm to turn his focus on you but he yanked his arm away.

“I thought you were my lawyer.” Ray pressed.

“I am your lawyer but I can’t do anything to help you if you can’t answer this one simple question. Why didn’t you blow the whistle when you watched your boss murder an agent?”

“I don’t know.” Ray said quietly.

“Or when you saw Dex walk into that church?”

“Matt.” You tried but he shrugged you off.

“You didn’t say a goddamn word when he murdered a priest.”

“Matt!” You said firmly and turned on him.

“I don’t know.”

“Then why are we here?” Matt yelled.

“Because I took the damn bait!” Ray answered with the same tone. There was a pause while your hand twisted at your side to bring everything back to a calmer level. “Because I didn’t want my son to see me as just an average federal employee… I messed up. I destroyed my life, my family’s life. And I would do anything to take it all back again.”

“Good.” Matt nodded. “You tell that to the DA, and I can help you.”

You smacked his arm as he turned back to the table. You faced Ray and gave an apologetic smile. He gave a small nod before you stepped closer and put an arm over his shoulders. He hesitantly embraced you back and you felt a heavy shudder as that regret toppled against you.

“I know he’s a dick right now-“ You explained as you pulled away. “-but he’s a good lawyer. He’s gonna help you.”

“Thanks, Y/N.” He nodded. “And thank you for helping my family. I don’t know how I can repay you.”

“Consider it my apology.” You shrugged. “It never should’ve got to this point.”

“Yeah..”

“I’ve gotta get to work. Call me if you need anything.” You said quickly. “Oh, and Matt? Fisk nearly had me when he showed me that prison fight. If you hadn’t come back that night, it probably would’ve been me instead of Dex.. I would’ve done whatever I had to so I could protect you and your secret, even in death... Think about that.”

“I never would’ve asked you to do that.” He reasoned.

“You wouldn’t have had to and you know it. I didn’t ask you to stay at Midland but you did because you thought it was right. You thought I’d be safe, right?”

He nodded silently.

“Ray didn’t ask to be stuck in the middle of this bullshit either. Just help him do right by Sami, alright?”

As you were turning to leave, you nearly ran into Tower and Foggy. Foggy gave you a quick hug and you greeted Tower in a hurry before rushing out and to the hotel for

work. 

When you got in, you greeted the few agents that were left. All people you could no longer trust, even though most were nice enough. People that you knew would try to kill you if they were told to, whether they wanted to or not. People that weren’t on your side and may end up paying with their own lives. You set your shoulders as you walked down the hall and followed behind Dex as he entered the suite with the lunch tray.

“Can I get you anything else, Sir?” Dex asked, to which he was ignored.

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry about Karen Page. She would be dead if Agents Nadeem and Y/L/N hadn’t interfered.”

Again, he was met with silence and you almost felt bad for him. Dex needed reassurance, needed confirmation that he was doing right by someone. And to deprive him of that was what would truly break whatever was left in him. Whether or not that break would work in your favor was still up in the air so you couldn’t afford it. Not yet, at least.

“After everything you’ve done for me, I… I just wanted

to tell you that I’ll keep my word. I will find her and when I do, I am going-“

“No.” Fisk said simply and even you were surprised. “The matter will be handled but not by you.”

“I can handle Nadeem and Y/N.”

“Do nothing… It’s clear that I have put too great a burden on your shoulders. Your relationship with Agent Y/L/N, it was too sentimental for you to finish the job. You let her beat you.”

“I don’t care about Y/N, alright? I don’t. I can make this right.”

“I see it, the way you look at her.” Fisk nodded slightly as he caught sight of you. “It’s admirable that you want to protect her but it needs to end. She wouldn’t do the same for you.”

“That’s enough.” You spoke finally, earning a quick turnaround from Dex. “Let’s go, Dex.”

You could see the heavy movements of his chest as he breathed deeply. You offered a small nod and held a hand out for him to take. He looked between you and Fisk before taking your hand and letting you guide him out.

The small action was in no way a show of solidarity. It was nowhere near you two being on the same side again. All it was, to you, was a stand against Fisk. You very clearly had already chosen Matt’s side since Dex attacked the Bulletin, and even before that. You wouldn’t turn on the man you loved - and the man who still loved you - for a man who was dead set on killing your friend.

For the time being, you would use that soft spot to your advantage for as long as you had it.

And it showed Fisk that you could still take Dex away.

“You can’t protect them both.” Fisk called as you began to leave. “You’ll have to choose.”

“So will you.” You glanced up and saw Vanessa standing near the top of the stairs. “Who will you protect?”

Back at Fogwell’s, Matt and Foggy were well into their conversation with DA Tower about what Ray knew. The back and forth finally settled on five years jail time for Ray, on all felony accounts. Tower promised to have a grand jury together by 4pm, so all that was left was securing immunity for Y/N.

“We have another agent who’s willing to testify alongside Ray, a character witness in his favor but also a witness to some of these crimes.” Matt began calmly, though if Y/N was there, she’d tell him he was practically vibrating.

“So where are they?” Tower shrugged.

“We’re not bringing her in until she’s guaranteed full immunity.” Foggy continued and Matt knew his friend was feeling that same surge, given how his heart was steadily beating faster.

No matter how many times they’d defended someone, how many times they went tit for tat against their oppositions in court. It was different when their friends were on the line. It always meant that much more.

“She…” Tower repeated with a nod. “It’s Y/L/N, isn’t it?”

“Immunity.” Foggy repeated calmly.

“If she’s as involved and knowledgeable as you say, then she’d be in deep shit. She’d lose her position at the FBI and there’d have to be jail time… What about an anonymous witness?”

“That’s hardly ever used in the US.” Foggy replied with furrowed brows.

“I’m sure I can make it work..”

“If you can’t….” Matt tried, waving his hand expectantly.

“How about… No jail time if she just peacefully retires from the FBI.” Tower shrugged.

“She won’t go for that.” Matt countered. “She loves that job.”

“I don’t care. I mean, don’t you guys see that she is just as much to blame as he is?” Tower insisted, pointing to Ray. “She didn’t stop anything either.”

“No, but she warned you from the start, didn’t she?” Matt answered smoothly, to which Tower sighed heavily. “She told you it was a bad idea but you all went along with it anyway.”

The DA cursed quietly before running a frustrated hand down his face. “If she can’t testify anonymously, then I guess she just has to deal with repercussions from the bureau.”

“Thank you. I’m sure we can get her to agree to that.” Foggy nodded with a proud smile before Tower left. He then turned to Matt and patted his friend on the shoulder. “You’re calling her.”

“What?” Matt’s jaw dropped. “She’s not gonna answer me!”

“She’s not gonna answer me!” Foggy reasoned. “And I thought you guys were patching things up. What happened to that?”

“C’mon, man.”

“When has she ever not answered when you called?” Foggy mumbled as he pulled out his phone and dialed Y/N, putting it on speaker. “But hey, feels good, right?” He grinned.

“What? Letting Ray serve five years?”

“Any other lawyers, he would’ve gone away a lot longer. But I meant working together, you and me.”

Foggy was so caught up in his own words that he didn’t realize Y/N had answered. Even Matt barely heard the shift from dial tone to active call.

“Doing what we’re supposed to be doing the way we’re supposed to be doing it.”

“Yeah..” Matt gave a small chuckle. “It felt good.”

“Right? I miss this. Working together, giving a shit about my clients.”

Y/N laughed quietly on the other end of the call.

“Not just billing midtown jackholes in six minute increments.”

“Bet those jackholes pay well though, huh?” Y/N laughed through the phone. “Matt make fun of the new shoes yet?”

“No, I was getting to it though.” Matt continued the joke and Foggy mocked the laughter. “I don’t know, Y/N/N. He might’ve gotten used to the money.”

“It suits him.” She agreed, and Matt knew there was a smile on her face.

“So I’ll get un-used to it.” Foggy countered happily. “We should do this again. All of us.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself. We’re not there yet.”

“But we’re getting there.”

Matt let out a small sigh but nodded, begrudgingly agreeing.

“Guys.. As much as I love this reconciliation, did you call me just so I’d be included?” Y/N asked with a light chuckle.

“No, actually, we have an update.” Foggy answered. “When do you get off?”

“I can probably leave around three for lunch or just take a half day if I need it. Why?”

“Tower can get the grand jury at four and you can get added to testify.”

There was a brief silence in the conversation, filled with the sounds of shuffling feet as Y/N was likely moving further away from her colleagues.

“Okay… What’s at stake for me?”

“You should be able to testify anonymously.” Matt explained. “And then you only have to take whatever backlash comes from the bureau.”

“You mean from Fisk through the bureau.” She scoffed.

“It was either that or an early retirement.” Foggy added. “I think it’s a solid plan, Y/N. And I’m pretty sure we’re gonna need you to sell this thing.”

She sighed and allowed a small silence to pass. Matt could only imagine the thoughts running through her head. She had to be worried about repercussions from Fisk. She’d been taunting him, challenging him since she’d met him, and now she’d be taking yet another stand against him. She had to know that every stand was potentially another nail in her coffin.

But how many times had she cheated death? Matt had started to think she was immortal, though not invulnerable. And they both knew Fisk knew what cards to play to expose her vulnerabilities.

Matt hated and loved that he was one of them.

“Okay.” Was all she said. “I’ll meet you guys where I left you and we can head together.”

“No, we should split.” Matt argued.

“No, we just go unmarked. Maybe a couple switches if it gets tense. I’m not losing this like we lost Jasper.”

“I really think-“

“And I think you need to stop questioning me.” She said firmly. “I’ve done stuff like this more than either of you. I think I should- Oh, shit. I gotta go.”

“Wait, Y/N.” Foggy tried but she was already gone.

“There you are.” Dex said as he approached you with an unusually welcoming smile. “Who you talking to?”

“Friend from college.” You shrugged and shoved your phone away. “Why are you in such a good mood?”

“You’ll see.” He nodded towards the door and began backing away, turning to walk straight once you began following him.

When you two walked in, you were met with two other agents attempting to maneuver a large white painting with a wooden frame.

Rabbit in a snowstorm.

“I thought she wouldn’t sell…” You spoke softly, in mild disbelief that Fisk’s most sentimental possession that he was denied had found its way back to him. “Something about the Nazis and her family being the rightful owners.”

“Just took some extra persuasion.” He shrugged.

That sentence didn’t sit right in your stomach as Vanessa joined you.

“This is from Wilson.” Dex told her and you stepped aside to let her stand between you two.

“I was wondering where it had gone.” Vanessa said, looking at the painting she too adored.

“It was home.” You mumbled and wiped a hand down your face to cover it.

“Y/N, wasn’t it?” She smiled at you. “Y/N Vostokoff.”

“Well, no. Y/L/N, actually.” You admitted.

Her brows raised slightly and she nodded. “Wilson has spoken very highly of you. He respects you a great deal.”

You saw in her eyes a knowing spark. Fisk told her who you were and she was letting you know. She was using her words from the last conversation you had with her as Exodus as a lure to flaunt her knowledge of your truth in front of you.

“The feelings aren’t mutual.” You lifted your chin slightly.

“Tell me, do you still have the painting?”

“Vibrant and loud, but also gentle and vulnerable… Yeah, I do. But it’s not hung anymore. Too many painful memories. The guy I was with when I bought it? We didn’t work out.”

“I see.” She nodded slightly. “Art is wonderful that way, isn’t it? Something so simple-“ She turned to face the large, seemingly blank canvas. “-can be so influential.”

“A bit unnerving as well.”

“As all powerful things are.” She looked over her shoulder to you again. “On either end of the spectrum.”

You looked at the simple painting again and while you remained unimpressed by the creation, your eyes snagged on the new pop of color on the side. A brief splatter of blood that almost no one would notice, but it stood out like neon to you. You then realized that the woman didn’t change her mind. Of course she didn’t. Of course Dex went off and did something terrible to an innocent woman who had suffered her fair share.

“We haven’t formally met yet.” Dex said and took a step to be more in front of Vanessa. Your brows raised slightly but you said nothing. “I’m Agent Poindexter.. Dex. And if you need anything at all, just think of me as the new James Wesley.”

You sucked in a breath between your teeth and tilted your head, earning the attention of both Vanessa and Dex.

“It’s a shame what happened to old Wesley, isn’t it? A whole clip on his chest… And an unrecognizable burn through his sternum. Now, I’d hate to see something like that happen to you.” You said with fake concern lacing your words. It earned you a confused expression that quickly shifted to a glare from your partner.

Vanessa offered you a slight smirk before returning to the previous conversation. “It’s a pleasure to meet you… Vanessa Marianna.” She moved to sit on one of the sofas and Dex shot you a warning look, to which you shrugged.

“I’ve always told Wilson that he has great taste in art.” Dex continued and you rolled your eyes.

“He does love to put beautiful things on display.” She agreed, but there seemed to be something else she was hinting at. “Where’d you find it?”

“Some lady had it. Wilson couldn’t get her to sell it.”

“Well, that must’ve been very disappointing for him. It’s the painting in his collection that means the most to us.”

“I figured as much, so I thought I’d ask her one last time.”

Vanessa scanned the painting again and you saw her attention catch on the slightly bloodied corner as well. You felt a brief uncertainty from her but it shifted to a strange sense of comfort. You wondered if she found peace in violence, in chaos, and maybe that’s why she liked Fisk.

If that was her, a seemingly innocent and unsuspecting woman, what did that mean for you? But when you thought about the violent men you attracted, you were genuinely thankful you were still alive.

The rest of your day was uneventful and you left for lunch right on time. Dex tried to get you to stay, to go with him and “get things back to normal” but you refused. He tried to reason that he was just off from Julie ghosting him and you had half a mind to scream that she was probably dead. Only reasons you didn’t were because you didn’t want to cause a scene when you were drastically outnumbered and if someone threw Matt’s death at you like that, you would’ve gone on a massacre that rivaled your escape from the Red Room.

“Courthouse. No stops.” Matt told the van driver before ushering Ray to the back. You hurried over and watched the relief cross Ray’s face as you got to them. “Nice of you to join us.” Matt smiled gently.

“Yeah, well.” You shrugged with a smile. “It’s not like I have a reason not to.”

“None of this bothers you, does it?” Ray asked a nervous chuckle as you climbed into the back of the van.

“Y’know, with the company of my esteemed attorney here, I have to tell you.” You began dramatically, watching Matt try to hold back a smile. “Rahul Nadeem, I’ve been through so much worse.. Fisk doesn’t scare me.”

“You ever think maybe he should?” He tried as the van took off, just trying to keep his mind distracted so as to not lose his nerve.

You cleared your throat slightly to break up the tension between you all. With a small flick of your fingers, you cleared his uncertainty and let trust fill its place. Trust in you and in Matt. He looked at you and then to Matt, who offered an interested head tilt in return, before he nodded to himself.

“I thought about it… But then who would do this?” You gestured to the van and he broke a small smile.

“You’re nuts, yknow that?” He laughed.

“So I’ve been told.” You nodded with a grin.

After a bit of silence, Ray turned to Matt.

“I’ve gotta ask you something.” He said simply.

“You wanna know about Daredevil.” Matt sighed and you tilted your head, quietly acknowledging that it was a fair thing to wonder.

“I stepped off the path for a few weeks and it destroyed my life… But your life, both of you, you step on and off all the time.”

“It complicates our life, too.” Matt said, seemingly thinking of just how that lifestyle affected him. “Trying to have it both ways.”

“Does it?” Ray scoffed slightly. “I mean, your friends know who you are, what you do. Your girl-“ He gestured to you. “-is right there with you.”

“My life almost got them killed.” Matt countered. “And not for the first time.”

“Not to mention what I drag them into.” You confessed and gave a small lift of your hand. “Everything he puts at risk, so do I. Problem is that I tend to make more rash decisions because I’m the one who’s stepped off the path… He talks about what he’s done and all this but he’s never gone far from the path, y’know? He’s always just walking next to it and finds his way back. Every time, I still try to do the right thing and stay on the straight and narrow but… There’s blood on my hands, Ray. A lot. And there’s always going to be blood on my hands. But if it keeps my friends safe and it helps someone else sleep at night, if a little girl can go home to her parents instead of becoming something like me, I’ll do it again.. We don’t get it both ways. We each sacrifice a lot because we continue to choose this. We give up certain things and..” Your eyes turned to Matt. “Even certain people.”

“Yeah, I don’t see how we could.” Matt sighed, his head turning to the floor as if disappointed. That feeling flashed, only for a moment, before disappearing and being replaced. You felt bad as you understood it was what you said.

Ray insinuated that you could have the people you loved and the lifestyle you continued to choose. And your words implied that you didn’t believe that or didn’t want it. But it wasn’t that you didn’t want it. It was that, at every opportunity, life seemed to not let you. You didn’t believe you were meant to have everything you wanted, so you sacrificed your relationship with Matt because just having him as a friend was better than him dead.

“You guys already do.” Ray said gently, meeting your eyes and offering a small nod towards Matt to which you frowned slightly. “I messed up, and no matter what happens today, I don’t know if my wife’s ever coming back.”

“She loves you, Ray.” You offered honestly, earning a small smile from him. “You’re the father of her child, for crying out loud. It might take time but you’re not gonna lose her. You won’t lose your family.”

“And your friends, they keep coming back.. How do you hold on to them?”

You turned to Matt and he sighed to himself. You leaned back and crossed your arms with slightly raised brows, interested in what Matt would say.

“It’s not me.. It’s them.” He nodded towards you. “They hold on to me.”

You noticed Matt’s attention shift, but all you could hear was the honking. You pushed yourself up quickly and climbed to a kneel as you ditched your blazer. You reached for your gun as Matt motioned for you to get down. Seconds later, he grabbed Ray and your trio dropped to your stomachs. When the bullets finally stopped, you got up quickly and gripped your weapon. You turned over your shoulder and felt a fading sensation from the front seat.

“Driver’s dead.” You said quickly before waving a hand to Ray’s attention “Get your gun out. Matt?”

“Uh..” Matt said before grabbing your hands and showing where to shoot. “There’s a guy right here.”

“Y/L/N, we can’t shoot blind.” Ray tried.

“They’re reloading. Fire your weapon!” Matt insisted.

You groaned in mild annoyance and fired two quick shots. Matt gave you a new target and you fired again. Ray took the third so you hopped out of the van.

You felt a hand trying to close around your arm as you landed but you were quick to move out of reach. You kept your gun raised as you crept around the stopped vehicles. You came across a man on the floor, gripping his bleeding leg, so you came up and pressed your foot against the wound. He yelled in pain so you fired a shot through his forehead. A loud shatter drew your attention and you saw Matt diving through the windshield.

You rolled your eyes slightly at his dramatics before meeting with him and Ray.

“We need to stick together.” Matt scolded as he repositioned his glasses.

“If we did what I said, we wouldn’t be here.” You mumbled as you took position in front of them. “Just follow me.”

“Y/N, just stop and listen.” He grabbed your arm and yanked your back. You pulled out of his grip and used your other hand to press him back against the nearest car. “Trust me, alright? You two pretend to lead me and do what I say.”

“Мне не нужна твоя помощь.” You sneered, pushing off him and moving forward again. (I don’t need your help.)

You moved to the other side of the cars and got to the side of the next two. While they were distracted firing at Ray, you moved quickly. You ran at them and let yourself collide with the first man, hooking an arm around his shoulders. Using the first man as leverage, you slammed your feet against the second one. The impact made him fall back and hit the back of his head against the car.

As your momentum shifted to push you backwards, you moved your leg until you felt your foot against the car. You hooked the toe of your shoe into the wheel well. That allowed you somewhere to steady yourself and pull, which forced the first man to slam back against the hood. You climbed up so one knee was against his chest as you slammed your gun against his temple.

You watched as Matt and Ray made their way forward but you were distracted by a heavy hit of fear. You quickly looked around the cars before seeing the familiar yellow fog leaking from a sedan a few feet away. At the same time you were making your way to her, one of Fisk’s gunmen was heading that way.

You acted fast, firing a shot into the man’s leg. He buckled almost instantly, which allowed Matt time to pick him up and slam him into the vehicle. You opened her door and got her attention while Matt fell into his helpless blind man routine. Flashing your badge was enough to get her to trust you and run as fast as she could in the other direction.

When you found the guys again, they were stuck in a fistfight on a bus. You climbed to the hood of the closet car, knelt as you lined your shot at the man that had Ray, and fired. The bullet landed in the side of the man’s head, causing him to fall limp. You slid down and hurried across as Matt kicked a man out of the bus. When he tried to get up, you slammed your heel down to finish it.

“Oh shit.” Matt groaned.

“What?” Your brows furrowed.

“It’s a cab.”

“Who cares? Just get in. Ray, you drive.”

You climbed into the backseat and shoved your gun back into place. You wiped the blood splatters from your hands and face but could do nothing about the splotches on your clothes.

At least you had evidence of the attack.

Ray made it a quick drive to the courthouse and the three of you were quickly ushered into the building. You met with Foggy and Karen, who didn’t bother to hide their concerned expressions. You offered a small smile for reassurance but that seemed to only deepen Foggy’s frown. Tower rushed your group through the halls, which allowed for Foggy to give a rundown on what would happen next.

“What about my family?” Ray asked, turning to you.

“My guy is taking care of it. They should be out by tonight, early morning at the latest. Karen, can you get the details to Seema?” You leaned around the group to see her on the far end.

“Yeah, yeah I can.” She nodded quickly. 

You pulled a folded envelope from your back pocket and passed it over, with all the details of where they were going and what you were able to give them, along with the number to text her address to once you said it was good. You explained that you’d tell them once you heard back.

“Right after I do this.” She gestured outside.

“Well, wait.” You stepped behind the guys to move closer. “What are you trying to do?”

“Press conference.”

“Are you insane?”

“Look, it’ll keep the majority of eyes off you guys for a minute. I’m pretty sure he’s gonna be pretty interested in what I’m gonna have to say.”

“Karen…”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Be careful.” You sighed and she patted your arm before hurrying off.

Tower led you and Ray into the courtroom and the small room had an entirely different atmosphere. It was suffocatingly tense and the fear hung heavy in the room. You cleared your throat slightly to try and break it up, but it seemed to swell right back together. You tilted your head slightly with a quick brow raise to admit to yourself that it wouldn’t change.

“Before we begin, I should make it known that your petition for an anonymous witness has been declined. Given the severity of this case, any and all federal agents need to be identified and held responsible. Will both witnesses proceed?” The judge explained as you all approached the bench.

Ray’s hand found yours and you shivered slightly. It was no different, to testify anonymously or not. You stood against Fisk before and survived. You took on Dex multiple times and survived. The Hand. Yakuza. Red Room. Billy Russo. You wouldn’t turn and cower because your name was going to be attached to your words.

You would stand against Fisk, mask or no mask and taunt his retaliations yet again.

Let him come. Let him try.

“Yes, I will.” You nodded.

They took Ray’s testimony first while you sat beside Tower. It seemed to drag on, every word raking across your nerves. Your own body felt electric, thrumming heavily with every second that ticked by. At first, you assumed it was your own jitters but you had gone through worse. You were raised to withstand worse, so why were you so rattled?

You realized then it was coming from somewhere else. You turned the jury and saw the faintest buzzing around them. Understandably, it was a huge case to be a part of so it made sense they’ll have some anxiety. But one juror in particular stood out. One seemed to be vibrating in his seat.

Something else was weighing on him.

He looked quickly between you and Ray, fidgeting with his hands as his leg bounced hard enough to rock him in his seat.

Your eyes closed and you sighed to yourself as you understood. Fisk had a man on the grand jury. Nothing you said would matter.

You’d already lost.

[petertingle-yipyip]

mad at god - Matt Murdock (Masterlist)

Pairing: Daredevil x Exodus (Matt Murdock x Reader)

Summary: (enemies to lovers) Y/N and Matt were friends since college, though they both have a secret from one another. When the sunsets and the Devil roams Hell’s Kitchen, there’s one person who seems to get in the way, Exodus.

(1) God Complex - Y/N is back in Hell’s Kitchen and is on a mission to protect girls from her same fate. But when the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen gets in her way, a rivalry blossoms. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(2) If Walls Could Talk - Matt Murdock and Foggy Nelson weren’t always a duo. Back at Columbia, they were a trio that included Y/N Y/L/N. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(3) Traitor - The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen had become some sort of unofficial partners with Exodus, but Fisk’s games nearly tears them apart. Does she have any loyalty to the Devil or is she willing to throw him to the wolves? (MINI-PREVIEW)

(4) Crisis - Inch by inch, Exodus creeps her way into Y/N’s everyday life. When an unexpected project throws her friends into the fire, she has to make a decision to pack up the suit or keep this secondary life alive. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(5) Till It Doesn’t Hurt - Matt tries to figure out the best way to go about the Fisk situation. But in the process, Matt realizes that it’s not as simple as he thought it was. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(6) Not Friendly - Things are revealed, but not exactly in the way Y/N expected... Now she has some serious explaining to do. (very brief SA reference. blink and you’ll miss it) (MINI-PREVIEW)

(7) What If It Doesnt End Well - Sudden changes can be oh so dangerous for the life of a vigilante. How can Y/N possibly cope when her entire world shifts beneath her feet? (MINI-PREVIEW)

(8) Mad At God - One can only take so much pressure until they pop. Exodus finally snaps and takes a chance, but what does that mean for her and The Devil Daredevil? (MINI-PREVIEW) (SUIT EXTRA)

SEASON TWO

[petertingle-yipyip]

devil on my shoulder - matt murdock (masterlist)

Pairing: Daredevil x Vigilante!Reader (Matt x reader)

Summary: With the Fisk situation behind her, Exodus tries to move forward without Daredevil. But as fate would have it, that shift changes Y/N’s relationship with Matt. The two start to wonder if maybe those lives are more interconnected than they first believed.

SUMMARY VIDEO // SEASON ONE // DEFENDERS // SEASON THREE

(1) Criminal: With Wilson Fisk in the past, Exodus tries to move forward without Daredevil. But a strange meeting leads to potentially another threat… Or maybe an ally. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(2) Glimpse of Us: Earning trust in Hell’s Kitchen is surprisingly easy when it comes to your newest ally. But one long night reveals more about all of you than you had expected (MINI-PREVIEW)

(3) Thank Me Later: Working with the Punisher was supposed to be simple. But Daredevil finds a way into the mix yet again and one long night brings some unexpected yet very welcome advice and insight into a new friend, along with an implosion of what was left standing. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(4) New Girl in Town: Helping an old friend leads to more trouble than it’s worth, especially when it interferes with the fate of a new friend. Dots are finally connected but is the outcome really worth it? (MINI-PREVIEW)

(5) Why Am I Like This?: The case of a lifetime. Frank Castle V The People. Benefits of working with the Punisher meant you knew who he really was and you were ready to go to war to prove it. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(6) Not My Job Anymore: The People v. Frank Castle hits the pinnacle and it seems to take down everything else in her life, too. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(7) Only Love Can Hurt Like This: Nelson and Murdock finally falls, leaving a cracked friendship in its wake. With a new development from Frank Castle, Y/N and Matt go to visit an old… adversary. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(8) I’ve Had Enough: The magnetism that is Matt Murdock is hard to ignore, especially in tender moments that seemed to be few and even further between. But maybe - just maybe - there’s enough spark to rekindle a flame. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(9) Devil Doesn’t Bargain: Comfort comes with the familiar as Y/N and Matt find a way to something softer than bickering. But even then, a new revelation shakes their relationship with an old mutual friend. (MINI-PREVIEW)

(10) Devil On My Shoulder: Daredevil, Exodus, and Elektra v. The Hand. Three go in, two go out and nothing is quite the same between the ones who remain. (MINI-PREVIEW) (Bonus Matt POV)