#rhys header

[evacrstairs]

twisted games (rhysbridget) headers. like/reblog if you save or use. 🏰

[nghtcrwling]

Velvet Goldmine (1998)

★ like or reblog if u save

[ijustliketoedit]

IZZY SITTING IN WEE JOHN'S LAP IN THE LAST PICTURE????????

[djarin]

4 MERMAID STEDE HEADERS requested by @sherlockig

Find them all on my headers page! 

All headers (640x360) under the cut in 3 different colours

Credit is always appreciated!

LIKE/REBLOG if you save or use

Requests are open for other headers!

[spideyns]

ACOTAR HEADERS

like if save/use or credit @evrllarks on tt

[archeryicons]

our flag means death s2 twitter headers

without psd

© to @siriusunrise on twitter (click!)

or like/reblog this post if you use/save 

[adrianvokov]

rhysbridget headers, twisted games.

like or rt if u save

[rhys-xiv]

healer.

[daycourtofficial]

Falling in Love on the Fourth Floor - Part 13

Pairing: Azriel x reader | WC: 1.8k | Warnings: none | Masterlist

Summary: Out of an act of desperation, you move in with a guy you kind of know who happens to have a really hot brother who lives next door.

Author's note: everyone say thank you to @sarawritestories for bullying me to get me to write and to @milswrites for the NEW HEADER LOOK IT'S SO PRETTY

Ten minutes to the dot from getting to your door Azriel was walking into your apartment with a bowl of popcorn and several bags of candy. He brought chocolates, gummy worms, cookies, and several other sweets in the crook of his elbow, several being held by random fingers. You really weren’t sure how he was carrying it all. 

In your absence he also changed into some black sweatpants and a black tee, his arms flexed with all the snacks in his hold. He looked great at mini golf, but now he looked attractive in such a different way. 

“What are you doing?” He looked a bit ridiculous, as if he just raided a candy store. He looked even more ridiculous trying to toe his shoes off before making his way over to you.

“I know you don’t have food here.”

“Yes we do - Cassian was supposed to go grocery shopping yesterday!” You whip your head to the kitchen, as if you could see the inside of your pantry from where you sat. “Besides I ordered a pizza.”

He gives you a look, “Cassian’s version of grocery shopping is stopping at our apartment and taking what he wants.”

Your eyes widen, “no he does not! He said he goes to the store for food.”

He scoffs, setting down the candy and snacks on the table in front of you, lining them all up so you could see the label on each bag, “the store of Rhys and Az, maybe. A 24 hour convenience store Cassian has a lifetime membership to.”

You think back to all the times Cassian told you he was going grocery shopping, but you’re not sure if you ever did see him come back with bags of groceries. All the food and supplies just showed up. “Well, I’m sorry he does that. It does explain his luxurious tastes though…”

“It’s fine,” he says sitting next to you, your legs touching. “Rhys’s dad pays for the groceries, so..” 

His sentence lingers as he shrugs his shoulders. “It’s what’s worked for us for a long time. Rhys couldn't care less. Actually I think he prefers getting to spend money on us.”

“So things with Rhys’s dad are weird?”

“Uh, yeah, I suppose. His dad sucks. Gives Rhys a- basically an unlimited credit card. Rhys has played with the limits on it before. We all know he’s rich, we just don’t know how rich. He’s spent a ridiculous amount of money on that card with no response. Once he bought all of ours and Cassian’s furniture in one trip - bought ridiculously priced shit too. Didn’t even blink over it.”

He scoops up a handful of popcorn, popping some into his mouth. “Well, all the furniture except their ridiculously sized tvs.”

You giggle, grabbing the bag of sour candies he brought and opening them, popping some in your mouth. “Mm, you’re too good to fall victim to their childish antics?”

“I’m more evolved than them.”

“So it was a different Azriel that Cassian was talking about going racing with him on some backroads a few weeks ago?”

A beat passes and he refuses to look at you, his eyes straight forward. “I think Cassian has face blindness.”

“Oh yeah, mhm.” You pick up the remote, scrolling to look through potential movies to watch. “Maybe we should get a decal for your bike so he won’t get confused again. I’m thinking of something that makes you seem distinguished.”

“Oh?”

“Something that makes you seem intimidating.”

“something scary?” His eyes dance with amusement, crinkling in contained joy.

“Something terrifying. So they know you’re a menace.”

You scroll through the movie options, Azriel’s arm making its way across the back of the couch behind you. He spreads his legs a bit, and you nestle into his shoulder as you put on Jurassic Park, picking a movie you’d be okay with missing some parts to it.

The two of you had watched at least three quarters of Jurassic Park, several parts of the movie missed because the two of you couldn’t keep from making out on your couch. 

You watched the entire trilogy, staying up late with him. By the time the second movie came on, the two of you talked through most of it, until you’d reach the scenes with the pterodactyls in the third movie. Then you had forced your hands over his mouth, not letting him talk over your favorite scenes. Once you had pulled them away, he immediately dove on top of you, pushing you into the couch and nuzzling his face into your neck.

The two of you stayed up until somewhere around 3 AM, the third movie long forgotten as you asked him to stay the night. Nothing happened, except you did wake up the next morning with his arm slung around your waist, making it very tempting to completely ignore your alarm clock.

Unfortunately, Azriel had work to do, kissing your temple before he snuck back into his apartment to get dressed.

He had been gone for all of twenty seconds when your phone buzzed and he asked if you’d like to get coffee the next day before class. Your classes lined up at the same time each day, so you two would meet up at a local coffee shop in the morning. You’d park your car in the grocery store lot afterwards, Azriel holding out his spare helmet for you before helping put it on your head before he’d zip you two through campus, one of his hands always on your thigh. 

The two of you would separate once he’d walk you to your classes, and then you’d meet back up at the library. It was a bit concerning to you how quickly the two of you fell into a routine, most of your free time of the week either spent with him or texting him.

“I got you something.”

You rummage through your bag when Azriel walks up to the table, his jacket being thrown onto one of the extra chairs. He sets down his helmet as you continue your search. You slide the envelope across the table, his scarred fingers touching yours as he grabs it from you. He opens the envelope, pulling out the note.

‘To be more menacing’ is written on pink stationary, a sticker falling from the paper. He picks it up, a smile on his face as he turns the sticker in his fingers, the cartoon goose with a knife in his mouth looking back at you.

His smile is captivating in the harsh lighting of the library, the LEDs making his skin several shades too light.

But it made his smile all the more blinding. 

“Thank you,” he slips the sticker into his jacket pocket, sliding into the seat across from you.

He pulled out his laptop, his bag neat and tidy, a far cry from Cassian’s paper cluttered bag. You go back to reviewing your notes, as Azriel begins typing on his computer. The silence is comfortable between you two, and as you feel it start to settle, Azriel’s foot grazes your own, sticking itself between your crossed ankles. 

You peer at him across the table, but his tortoiseshell glasses don’t move towards you, his computer screen reflecting through them to show he was working on some form of coding you had no desire to understand. You smile back down to your books, trying to get all your work finished before Friday, the six of you spending the weekend at Rhys’s dad’s lake house. 

Cassian had been moaning and groaning for several weeks about wanting to go to the lake, but Rhys’s dad was having renovations done on the house and on the private dock until roughly two weeks ago. Since its completion, Cassian has been relentless, worming the word ‘lake’ into every conversation he’s had, not being very subtle about what he wanted.

Every morning he texted your group chat about his ‘cornfLAKEs’ or about how he just loves ‘snowfLAKEs’. He had just run out of words two days ago and now resorted to making up words that had ‘lake’ in them. Rhys immediately texted everyone to ‘please for the love of my sanity, be available this weekend or else I’m petitioning we murder Cassian’. 

None of you wanted to be stuck doing any kind of work this weekend - Cassian and Azriel already had the weekend off, Mor and Feyre were free, and your plans revolved around the work and the man in front of you. All of you were desperate to finish any work that was due on Monday before the six of you left.

“So this weekend.”

He holds up a finger, typing furiously before he stops, looking up at you. He closes his laptop slightly, pushing it away from himself. 

“This weekend.”

You put your chin in your hands, looking at his tan face. You loved seeing him wear his glasses - they made him look so endearing and soft. “Are we um going to tell anyone before we go? Besides Mor, obviously.”

You had texted Mor at some point during the second or third movie, asking her if she had mentioned your date to anyone. She had said no and that she’d be willing to keep it that way if you remembered to thank her profusely for ‘setting you up on the best date of your life’. 

You had agreed, but now this left you with a bit of a dilemma - when do you tell everyone? Does he want to tell everyone?

“You don’t understand how annoying they can get when it comes to my love life.”

You giggled, certain you could figure it out based on how nosey and meddling Cassian was. 

He clears his throat, “besides I’d like to figure things out with you before they know. I don’t want them to scare you off.”

You laughed, “I walked in on Cassian trimming his toenails the other night. I think anything worse than that violates the Geneva convention.”

His smile is bright as he watches you giggle at your own joke. “How about this,” his hands move across the table, laying them palm up so you can sit yours into them. Your fingers lightly trace the lines on his palms as his voice picks up again. “I’ll take you out for lunch tomorrow, and it will be the official end of things… until we get back.”

You raise your brows, but he’s not finished. “Obviously, not really the end of things. But just.. We’ll come back from lunch as the people we were last week. Before mini golf.”

Your voice is a bit unsteady as you ask, “do you want to stay those people? The before mini golf versions of ourselves?”

“No.” His reply is fast, voice full of conviction.

“You’re not just saying this because Rhys’s lake house has a hot housekeeper, are you?”

He blows out his lips, laughing at your waggling eyebrows, “Sonya’s been about eighty years old for the past fifteen years.” His fingers quickly snatch yours, holding them tightly. “So she’s perfect for me.”

You throw your head back, about to laugh, but he pulls your fingers forward, bringing you in for a soft kiss you can’t help but giggle through.

Series taglist: @anotherbook-obsessedhoe @impossibelle @hayrunnwr @just-a-social-casualty-1 @thisisew @brieflyclassymortal @glitterypirateduck @marshmummy @bookishbroadwaybish @azsteris @doriansgf @footyandformula @mybestfriendmademe @od-anon @judig92 @luvmoo @marina468 @buckyandgeraltsupremacy @acotarobsessed @maryssong23 @acourtofbatboydreams @azrielover

Permanent taglist: @vanilla-seabass @cyrygher @lees-chaotic-brain @topaz125 @chessebookgirl @fides25 @lady-of-tearshed @ashbatz @fxckmiup @lilah-asteria @justvibbinghere @daughterofthemoons-stuff @mybestfriendmademe @heartless-tate @tsunami-of-tears @idrkwhatthisisimsorry @olive-main @azrielsmate3 @pit-and-the-pen @durgenyx @dee-writes-smut @chairofchaos @thelov3lybookworm @berryzxx @throneofsmut @kennedy-brooke

Azriel taglist: @brieflyclassymortal @thisiskaylin

Thanks for reading <3

[garcargofarfar]

MID Boys Headers

Asch, Pierce, Rhys, Leif, Noi

[ninthcircleofprythian]

🔥- Smut 💕- Fluff 🙈- Angst 🩹- Hurt/Comfort

Masterlist Header by @saradika-graphics

Please read all warnings on fics - some fics contain heavy emotional topics and explicit descriptions. All fics will be appropriately tagged at the time of posting. Please read them carefully before diving in. Your mental health matters.

Azriel

🔥 Winner Takes All - After returning from a girls retreat weekend at the cabin, Nesta and Celeste find out the Bat Boy husbands have made a bet they are sure to lose. (Azriel x OC Celeste)

🔥Here Comes The Sun - When the Spymaster of the Night Court discovers your little crush, you end up crossing a lot of firsts off your list. (Azriel x You/Reader)

🔥💕Dinner and Dessert - As his mate's due date approaches, Az can't handle the sight of her pregnant body in a sundress without going a bit feral. (Azriel x OC Mira)

Continuing Series

Unbound - Not having a mating bond didn't stop the love Azriel and Celeste have for each other or their commitment. When an unknown magic lingering from Celeste's past causes her to lose all memories of the last century, will they be able to rebuild their life without a bond tethering them together? (Azriel x OC Celeste)

💕🙈 Part 1 - They Don't Know About Us

🙈 Part 2 - Don't Pull Away

💕Part 3 - We're Going to Solstice Dinner -- and We're Gunna Get Married

🙈🩹 Part 4 - Dancing With Your Ghost

🙈 Part 5 - As The World Caves In

🙈 Part 6 - Numb, But I Still Feel It

🙈 Part 7 - Putting on a Brave Face

🙈 Part 8 - Take Me To Church

Cassian

🔥 Kiss - Don't Tell - Cassian/Azriel - M/M - after a wild threesome months ago - Cas and Az get a little curious what things would be like without a third party involved

Eris

🔥 Make It Hurt - After a truly terrible day you come home only to be surprised by the one and only Eris Vanserra and he knows how to make it all better. (Eris x You/Reader)

💕 Stuck in the Middle with You - Eris relents to participate in a throuples Halloween costume contest at your insistence. (Halloween modern AU) (Eris Week 2024 - AU day) (Azris/Reader)

Continuing Series

The Bird and The Badger - a series of interconnect one shots told in non-linear order detailing the life of Eris x OC (Bryn) --- eventual Azris x OC (Parts will be listed here in chronological order)

💕A Matter of Trust - Eris needs to find someone he can trust to help with part of his secretive plan against Beron.

🙈Keeping Up Appearances - Eris and Bryn travel to Night Court to enact the bargain with Rhys.

Azris

💕A Pocketful of -- Ragweed? - (Short little drabble for Azris week) Eris might be snide and snarky with his words, but he sure knows how to surprise his mate with his actions.

🙈 May Her Memory Be a Blessing - no summary. please read the authors notes. this will hurt. emotional damage.

💕 When You Wish Upon a Star - just a little slice of life and domesticity for dad!Az and dad!Eris.

Elucien

💕 Scrabble Drabble - Family game night after weekly dinners tended to get a little contentious. It wasn’t unusual for someone to quit midway through or to accuse another of cheating. It was no different now that Lucien had joined in the weekly tradition with his mate, Elain.

💕Icing Is The Spice Of Life - Elain may have slightly over-commited her famous holiday cookies to friends and family. But her mate Lucien comes to the rescue. Cuteness abounds.

Headcanons

💕 In which the fae of Prythian discover bubble gum - (Feysand, Nessian, Elucien, Azris, Mor)

Corner Productions

(Collaborations with Chaos)

🔥 Gold Star for You - silly NSFW smut headcanons of everyone and reader - Reader introduces gold star reward system in the bedroom.

💕 With This Ring - Headcanons about Eris Vanserra and his affinity for jewelry - especially after a certain Shadowsinger enters his life.

[bats2102]

ACOWAR set up an Elain+Lucien Book

ACOWAR is Elucien coded. This book lays out all the major plot points, characters, and powers that will shape the relationship between Elain and Lucien. As I revisited ACOWAR, I couldn't help but notice a ton of textual evidence hinting at a final pairing between them.

For those who disagree that Lucien demonstrates any traits that correlate to a mating bond, I encourage you to actually look at Lucien’s behavior and actions through the ACOWAR novel. And if you are not interested in re-reading the novel, that’s okay I brought receipts. 

This analysis will provide compelling evidence of the Elucien connection and illuminate how ACOWAR lays the groundwork for their future storyline. Below are the main areas that will be explored, each accompanied by corresponding headers.

Early Mate Behavior 

Lucien’s introspection and selflessness

Primal mate behavior and the BOND BONDING

Parallels between their “souls” and characters

Lucien’s Devotion to Elain

The Internal conflict regarding bond

Future plot/story

And for good measure: Amren thinking Lucien is also Hot AF (ACOWAR edition)

Early Mate Behavior 

Lucien demonstrates mate behavior early as page 10 in ACOWAR by showing concern and determination to find Elain, whom he believes is being kept by Rhysand. Feyre, however, counters Lucien's determination by dismissing the significance of the mating bond between him and Elain. She argues that the mating bond is merely a physical reaction and implies that Lucien's actions are driven by instinct rather than genuine emotional connection to Elain. Feyre tries to undermine the legitimacy of Lucien's feelings by suggesting that he's being controlled by the bond and doesn't truly know Elain.

In response, Lucien challenges Feyre's perspective by drawing a parallel to her own situation with Rhysand. Countering that if that were the case it would apply to her bond to Rhys as well. He questions whether her relationship with Rhysand a physical reaction is also just, implying that their bond might be more than Feyre is willing to acknowledge.

“Despite what Jurian implied regarding how my sisters will be treated by Rhysand, I had told him, despite what the Night Court is like, they won’t hurt Elain or Nesta like that—not yet. Rhysand has more creative ways to harm them. Lucien still seemed to doubt it (ACOWAR pp.10)”

Lucien breathed, “Where is he keeping her?” I knew who he meant. I shook my head. “I don’t know. Rhysand has a hundred places where they could be, but I doubt he’d use any of them to hide Elain, knowing that I’m aware of them.” “Tell me anyway. List all of them.” “You’ll die the moment you set foot in his territory.” “I survived well enough when I found you.” “You couldn’t see that he had me in thrall. You let him take me back.” Lie, lie, lie. But the hurt and guilt I expected weren’t there. Lucien slowly released his grip. “I need to find her.” “You don’t even know Elain. The mating bond is just a physical reaction overriding your good sense.” “Is that what it did to you and Rhys?” A quiet, dangerous question. But I made fear enter my eyes, let myself drag up memories of the Weaver, the Carver, the Middengard Wyrm so that old terror drenched my scent. “I don’t want to talk about that,” I said, my voice a rasping wobble. (ACOWAR pp. 12-13)

Lucien's strong commitment to Elain's safety, is not solely driven by their bond it is also powered by his past experiences and concerns about Rhys's reputation. Unable to confirm Elain's well-being, he fears she may be subjected to the Night Court's dark reputation, intensifying his urgency to locate her. We know as readers that elain is not being harmed in her stay in NC, however Lucien has only known NC to be a place of horror thus the inability to confirm Elain's safety leads Lucien to contemplate the possibility that the Night Court's notorious reputation is being imposed upon her, adding an extra layer of concern and urgency. 

“She is my mate and in my enemy’s hands—” “I’ve made no secret from the start that Elain is safe and cared for.” “And I’m supposed to believe you.” “Yes,” I hissed. “You are. Because if I believed for one moment that my sisters were in danger, no High Lord or king would have kept me from going to save them.” He just shook his head, the candlelight dancing over his hair. “You have the gall to question my priorities regarding Elain—yet what was your motive where I was concerned? Did you plan to spare me from your path of destruction because of any genuine friendship, or simply for fear of what it might do to her?” I didn’t answer. 

If you are going to re-read a portion of the novel, I implore you to read pages 145-150 (Kindle edition) of ACOWAR. This portion of the novel really provides a look at character dynamics, Lucien’s loyalty, themes of trust and betrayal, and foreshadows future conflicts. Lucien argues that he NEEDS TO SEE elain safe, and he was willing to stand up against his perceived enemy the NC to ensure that is achieved. From his perspective, he likely sees parallels between the Night Court's actions and Tamlin's treatment of Feyre. Rather than escalating tensions or reacting rashly to the complexities of the mating bond, Lucien opts for a measured response: "There is a longer story to be told, it seems (ACOWAR pp.146-147). This response defuses the immediate tension and allows for further discussion without further antagonizing Rhysand. Lucien's choice to stand down and patiently await the chance to see Elain underscores his unwavering commitment to her well-being and his understanding of the delicate circumstances at hand, showcasing his loyalty and depth of character.

Lucien’s introspection and selflessness 

And you know what Lucien does next, he listens to Feyre’s story. He actively listens to her story, willing to acknowledge and understand her expirences while reflecting on his own role, he doesn’t dismiss her words or react indifferently: 

“So, I told him. All of it—the story that perhaps would help him understand. And realize how truly safe Elain was—he now was (p.149)

“I hadn’t realized I was a villain in your narrative,” Lucien breathed. “You weren’t.” Not entirely. (P.150)”

This shows a level of introspection and self-awareness on Lucien's part, as he acknowledges the possibility that his actions may have been seen in a negative light by others. (Which I could argue almost all characters in the series do not reflect on the consequences of their actions and their effect on others. So pro self-reflective Lucien!)

When Lucien request Feyre to tell him about elain. He takes Feyre’s assessment of her sister in this passage “Elain would put on a hat and gloves and kneel in the dirt, weeding. She acted like a purebred lady in every regard but that (ACOWAR pp.13)” and runs with it. He LISTENED to Feyre’s description of elain so closely that he knew she would wear gloves when she gardened and considered in the next book (ACOSAF) that it would be a suitable gift to give her gloves, that is thoughtful, and I will not argue otherwise. 

Furthermore, when this man is telling Feyre how he was SA during calanmai, rather than focusing on himself in regard to this traumatic expirences, he is worried of what elain will think of this situation. Lucien was SA and his thoughts were still centered to the care of elain.

But Lucien … “You took Ianthe into that cave on Calanmai?” He wouldn’t meet my gaze. “She insisted. Tamlin was … Things were bad, Feyre. I went in his stead, and I did my duty to the court. I went of my own free will. And we completed the Rite.” No wonder she’d backed off him. She’d gotten what she wanted. “Please don’t tell Elain,” he said. “When we—when we find her again,” he amended. (ACOWAR pp 33)

Primal mate behavior and the BOND BONDING (just evidence of their bond, for those who want to invalidate it)

“But Lucien’s attention went right to the hallway toward the back, his nostrils flaring as he scented Elain’s direction. And who she’d gone with. A low snarl slipped out of him— “Relax,” Rhys said. “Azriel isn’t the ravishing type.” Lucien cut him a glare. (p.254)

“It felt … strange,” Elain breathed. “Like you pulled on a thread tied to a rib.” Lucien exposed his palms to her. “I’m sorry.” Elain only stared at him for a long moment. (pp.301)

“There’s a bond—it’s a real thread,” he said, more to himself than us. “And?” Mor asked. Lucien ran both hands through his long red hair. His skin was darker—a deep golden-brown, compared to the paleness of Eris’s coloring. “And I got to Elain’s end of it when she ran off.” “Did you sense anything?” “No—I didn’t have time. I felt her, but …” A blush stained his cheek. Whatever he’d felt, it wasn’t what we were looking for. Even if we had no idea what, precisely, that was. “We can try again—another day,” I offered. Lucien nodded but looked unconvinced. (p.302)

Being the one to trust elain’s visions and act upon them. Also, everyone else being concerned about their bond if something happened to him.

He only glanced at Elain, whose face was again a calm void while she traced a finger over the embroidery on the couch cushions. “Yes. Let me help in whatever way I can.” Even Nesta seemed relatively concerned. Not for him, no doubt, but the fact that if he were hurt, or killed … What would it do to Elain? The severing of the mating bond … I shut out the thought of what it’d do to me.

Lucien is the one to ask for a healer to see elain, he recognizes that elain went through trauma, LUCIEN WAS the one who verbally acknowledge elain went through trauma. 

“It wouldn’t hurt to have a healer look her over. Externally and internally.” I was tired enough that I could barely summon the breath to ask, “Do you think the Cauldron made her insane?” “I think she went through something terrible,” Lucien countered carefully. “And it wouldn’t hurt to have your best healer do a thorough examination.” (pp. 288-289)

And you know who thinks Elain’s mate will help her??? MADJA, Why? Because their souls connected

“Does she need further help?” Nesta said through her teeth. The ancient healer jerked her chin toward Lucien. “See what he can do. If anyone can sense if something is amiss, it’s a mate.” “How.” The word was barely more than a barked command. I braced myself to warn Nesta to be polite, but Madja said to my sister, as if she were a small child, “The mating bond. It is a bridge between souls.” 

What if Lucien was a gift from the cauldron?? 

“But what if the Cauldron gave something to Elain?” Nesta’s face drained of color. “What?” Equally ashen, Lucien seemed inclined to echo Nesta’s hoarse question. (p.336)”.

Parallels between their souls and characters

Elain and Lucien’s characters parallel one another and complement each other so splendidly. Lucien being the son of the high lord of day, and elain character first appearing in ACOWAR in a “suite filled with sunlight” in a “chair before the sunniest window (p. 154).” 

Elain is further associated with LIGHT and SUNSHINE, through the novel:

“Even wasted away by grief and despair, Elain’s beauty was remarkable. Hers was a face that could bring kings to their knees. And yet there was no joy in it. No light. No life. (p.246)”

The frustration. “What can I get you, Elain?” Only with Elain did she use that voice. But Elain shook her head once more. “Sunshine.” (p.302)

Well would you look at that, elain HERSELF thinks she needs sunshine.

They are both social beings who require light to feel alive: 

“Weeks of cloistering Elain had done nothing to improve her state (p.248)”

They both have eyes that allow them to see things that are hidden to others: 

“What makes you think you could find her?” Rhys asked. Not rudely, but—from a commander’s perspective. Sizing up the skills Lucien offered against the risks, the potential benefits. “This eye …” Lucien gestured to the metal contraption. “It can see things that others … can’t. Spells, glamours … Perhaps it can help” (p.339)

In the following passage Elain displays agency by taking control of the situation and proposing a plan of action to address a potential threat. She actively engages in decision-making and asserts her autonomy by insisting on speaking to the individual herself, despite objections from others. Similar to Lucien, who just left to find the individuals from elain’s visions and serves as an emissary and prioritizes the protection of his people. Elain steps forward with a plan to negotiate with a potential threat to ensure the safety of those seeking sanctuary.

Elain considered. “I can speak to him.” “No,” I said—at the same moment Nesta did. But Elain cut us off. “If—if you and … they”—a glance at Rhys, my friends—“come with me, your Fae scents might distract the dogs.” “You’re Fae, too,” Nesta reminded her. “Glamour me,” Elain said—to Rhys. “Make me look human. Just long enough to convince him to open his gates to those seeking sanctuary. Perhaps even let you set those wards around the estate.”

Elain also remembers that Lucien was the one to seek out the individual from her vision: “And even with the truth laid bare … none of us told him that Lucien had gone after her. Elain seemed to remember, though. Who was hunting for that missing queen.”

Both characters' aversion to violence highlights their compassionate and empathetic personalities, as well as their desire for peace and harmony. While they may find themselves involved in conflicts due to external circumstances, they both harbor a deep-seated discomfort with the inherent violence of such situations, reflecting their shared values of empathy, kindness, and a preference for peaceful resolutions. The repetition of this in the interaction where Elain reveals she only stabbed the enemy, not made the killing blow, underscores her aversion to violence and her reluctance to engage in battle, mirroring Lucien's own distaste for violence.

“Will—will many of these soldiers die?” I cringed, but Nesta said, “Yes.” I could almost see the unspoken words Nesta reined in. Your mate might die sooner than them, though” (p.485)

The sound as both armies collided … I didn’t have words for it. Elain covered her ears, cringing.

“Well, I never want to fight in another battle as long as I live, but … yes, I’m in one piece.” A faint smile bloomed on Elain’s lips (p. 675)”

Devotion to Elain

This man is devastated by Elain's mental state. Since the bond is a profound connection between two souls, and based on the text, Elain currently doesn't know how to block the bond, it's crucial to consider that every emotion Elain experiences is could also be felt by Lucien. Given her current unwellness, imagine the agony of being told she's fine and safe, only to witness her as a mere "hollow" version of the person described to him, likely feeling every ounce of the despair she's currently enduring.

Lucien was standing in the doorway. And from the devastation on his face, I knew he’d heard every word. Seen and heard and felt the hollowness and despair radiating from her. Elain had always been gentle and sweet—and I had considered it a different sort of strength. A better strength. To look at the of the world and choose, over and over, to love, to be kind. She had been always so full of light. (ACOWAR p. 156)

(Side note: elain being described as light again when at her best)

He saw her in this state than decided that he would be willing to subject himself to Rhysands control and the NC in order to be near her. 

“This house is warded against winnowing, both from outside and within. There’s one way out—the stairs to the city. It, too, is warded—and guarded. Please don’t do anything stupid.” “So, am I a prisoner?” I could feel the response simmering in Rhys, but I shook my head. “No. But understand while you may be her mate, Elain is my sister. I’ll do what I must to protect her from further harm.” “I would never hurt her.” A bleak sort of honesty in his words. I simply nodded, loosening a breath, and met Rhysands stare in silent urging. 

Lucien is acutely aware that Rhysand intends to exploit Elain's presence in the Night Court to manipulate him. And we know that this is indeed true as evident from Rhysand's own admission, "I trust in the fact that we currently have possession of the one thing he wants above all else (p. 195)," which underscores Rhyland’s strategic mindset. Recognizing Lucien's unwavering commitment to Elain's safety, Rhysand leverages this vulnerability to exert control over Lucien's actions. Moreover, Rhysand manipulates Feyre's perception of Lucien, exploiting her concerns and emphasizing his own ability to sway Lucien's decisions. This manipulation is evident in Rhysand's question to Feyre, "If he got Elain away, back to Spring or wherever … do you believe, deep down, that he wouldn’t sell what he knows? (p.195)." This inquiry serves to sow doubt and uncertainty, further solidifying his hold over Lucien and Feyre's perception of him.

Now from pages p.675-68 there are many important points between elain and Lucien but given how long this already is I will focus on a few. Following the battle, Lucien’s concerns regarding elain’s wellbeing are immediately demonstrated by ensuring her condition. Lucien acknowledges her contribution and shows understanding, indicating a supportive and encouraging dynamic between them. This is shown through Lucien acknowledging that elains visions were correct, the loss of her father, and her contribution to the killing of hyburn. During this elain invites Lucien to velaris (with encouragement of Feyre, she is still the one who said it), and are later seen in close proximity of one another. They are seen walking side by side or falling into step with each other, and there’s an unspoken understanding between them where they seem to intuitively know how to support each other without needing to verbalize their feelings. So, no I do not agree that they are ill suited or do not like being in each other presence, I believe it to be more complicated than that. 

Internal conflict regarding bond

To be honest, I'm just going to ask you to read pages 248-254. If you can read this, look into Lucien's thoughts, and believe that Lucien does not demonstrate mate behaviour and that Azriel is the character who understands and has undying devotion to Elain, then you're missing important components illustrated of Lucien's feelings. 

Lucien's concern for Elain is palpable as he observes her deteriorating mental and physical state. He feels her pain and suffering deeply, evidenced by his internal turmoil and desire to alleviate her suffering. Despite the risk of facing Rhysand's wrath, Lucien ventures out to seek a moment of respite, yet his primary focus remains on Elain's well-being. In the context of Lucien's guilt regarding Elain and his past relationship with Jesminda, there's a significant emotional burden that he carries. Lucien's guilt could be manifesting in his interactions with Elain, leading to moments of hesitation or emotional distance as he grapples with conflicting emotions. He may struggle with feelings of inadequacy or unworthiness, believing that he's not deserving of a mating bond with elain due to his unresolved feelings regarding Jesminda death, for which he holds himself responsible. Lucien's guilt regarding his mating bond with Elain and his past relationship with Jesminda adds layers of complexity to his character and relationships.

The highlighted passages below offer a crucial moment in the narrative, revealing the complex dynamics between Lucien and Elain and hinting at future storylines. His unwavering belief in Elain's abilities and the importance of her visions is evident as he volunteers to pursue the truth behind her latest revelation. 

As they are left alone together, the potential for significant developments in their relationship becomes apparent, as the deliberate departure of the other characters to create a space for Lucien and Elain to engage in a private conversation, the contents of which remain unknown. The deliberate departure of other characters creates a private space for Lucien and Elain, foreshadowing what could happen if provided the space to properly explore their mating bond. 

Before departing, Lucien shares a silent exchange with Elain, their gazes locking in a moment with Lucien’s filled with unspoken longing and sadness. Despite the palpable connection between them, neither Lucien nor Elain vocalizes their emotions, leaving the true nature of their bond ambiguous. Lucien's failure to glance back at Elain and Rhys's departure symbolize the unspoken barriers and uncertainties surrounding their relationship. This poignant moment highlights the intricate dance of emotions between Lucien and Elain, setting the stage for deeper exploration in future narratives.

“There is a reason why Elain is seeing these things. She was right about the other queen turning old, about the Ravens’ attack—why is she being sent this image? Why is she hearing this queen? It must be vital. If we ignore it, perhaps we’ll deserve to fail.” Silence. I surveyed them all. Vital. Each of them was vital here. But me … I sucked in a breath. “I’ll go.” Lucien was staring at Elain as he spoke. We all looked at him. Lucien shifted his focus to Rhys, to me. “I’ll go,” he repeated, rising to his feet. “To find this sixth queen.”

“And for once, my sister rose to her feet and came toward us, the three of us not so subtly heading upstairs. Leaving Lucien and Elain alone. It was an effort not to linger atop the landing, to listen to what was said. If anything was said at all.

Before that dark wind swept in, Lucien looked back. Not to me, I realized—to someone behind me. Pale and thin, Elain stood atop the stairs. Their gazes locked and held. But Elain said nothing. Did not so much as take one step downward. Lucien inclined his head in a bow, the movement hiding the gleam in his eye—the longing and sadness.”

“And when Lucien turned to signal to Rhys to go … He did not glance back at Elain. Did not see the half step she took toward the stairs—as if she’d speak to him. Stop him. Then Rhys was gone, and Lucien with him. When I turned to offer Elain breakfast, she’d already walked away.” (p.345)

Elain's conversation with her fiancé Greyson reveals the complications of her feelings regarding Lucien and the mating bond. Initially, Elain expresses uncertainty and confusion about her desires, admitting that she doesn't know what she wanted when she returned to Greyson. This passage with her literal fiancé illustrates her internal conflict (There is no evidence that elain wants to reject Lucien in the text of ACOWAR). Greyson's refusal to accept Elain's bond with Lucien further exacerbates her emotional turmoil, as she struggles to reconcile her mating bond with her desire for a conventional human male. 

Elain’s internal struggle to assert her agency and autonomy in the face of external expectations and societal norms will be important in her character development. Elain's initial denial and resistance pave the way for a journey of self-discovery and growth, where she must confront her fears and insecurities before embracing her true identity and forging a deeper connection with Lucien.

Graysen swallowed. “Did you think you could come back here—live with me as this … lie?” “No. Yes. I—I don’t know what I wanted—” “And you are bound to some … Fae male. A High Lord’s son.” A different High Lord’s heir, likely, I wanted to say. “His name is Lucien.” I wasn’t certain if I’d ever heard his name from her lips. “I don’t care what his name is.” The first sharp words from Graysen. “You are his mate. Do you even know what that means?” “It means nothing,” Elain said, her voice breaking. “It means nothing. I don’t care who decided it or why they did—” “You belong to him.” “I belong to no one. But my heart belongs to you.” Graysen’s face hardened. “I don’t want it.” (pp. 499-500)

The following moment marks a significant turning point in Elain's life as she realizes that her connection with Lucien has severed her ties to her previous human existence. Foreshadow the complexities and conflicts that may arise in Elain and Lucien's relationship, as well as the internal struggles Elain will face in reconciling her human past with her fae future. 

“So, Elain silently cried, the tears so unending that I wondered if it was some sign of her heart bleeding out. Some sliver of hope that had shattered today. That Graysen would still love her, still marry her—and that love would trump even a mating bond. A final tether had been snapped—to her life in the human lands. Only our father, wherever he was, remained as any sort of connection.” (p. 503).

Future plot:

Anyways ACOWAR set up elain and Lucien’s future plot lines. Through introducing koschei, elain’s vision, vassas curse (Lucien=spell cleaver, elain=discovered vassa), Tamlin and spring court (after all elain does think the WORLD needs more garden (p.693)) Eris and Lucien’s dynamic, discovering Helion is Lucien’s father, elain mourning her father (Lucien and him knew each other), elain and Lucien discovering their magic (their eyes) ... ect... 

And if you want to argue that Azriel has any major role in these plot lines I encourage you to read ACOSF and HOFAS as there is ample evidence that the characters and plots introduced in those novels are more centre to his and Gwyn’s character (I can bring more receipts... as essentially ACOWAR set up nessian and Elucien, and ACOSF set up gwynriel and Mor+em). It is crucial to analyze the plot lines beyond the lens of mere smut and romance, as this narrow focus undermines the depth of storytelling Sarah J. Maas has woven into the narrative. By broadening our perspective, we can fully appreciate the intricacies of the plot and explore the multifaceted dynamics that extend beyond the relationship between the MMC+MFC. 

And finally, while I can acknowledge that all these points are directed to an elain and Elucien book. SJM will still and will always have the final say.... 

Amren thinking Lucien being Hot AF (ACOWAR edition)

Even fucking Amren thinks Lucien is hot af.

But it was Amren who said from the floor, “You should kill Beron and his sons and set up the handsome one as High Lord of Autumn, self-imposed exile, or no. It will make life easier.” “I’ll take that into consideration,” Rhys said, striding toward her while I remained with the others. (p.159)

[iamqueenpotato]

I Hate That I Love You- Part Four

Azriel x Reader

A/N- Hi beautiful people! Here is part four! I hope you all had a wonderful Easter yesterday if you celebrate it. If not, I hope you had a wonderful Sunday :) This part was surprisingly longer than I thought it was going to be. Also, I made a header for this fic. I thought it may be easier than finding random photos of nature for each part haha okay I'm done rambling, enjoy!!

⚠️: None(I think)

Word Count: 3.5k

Part One

You absolutely despised this place. Two days in, and you were over it. You hoped there was something of importance to report to Rhys, but there was absolutely nothing different about this camp. The fact of not finding anything started getting on your nerves. And of course, Azriel was as well.

You knew sharing that cabin would be an interesting venture, but he was everywhere. Always waiting in the sitting room or in the kitchen. He lingered and yet never said a word to you, but then again, you left the rooms so quick you never gave him the chance to speak. But after being cooped up in your room for hours, you decided to leave the cabin, wearing your leathers. You walked out the door, and there he was, chopping up wood off to the side. Shirtless.

Your eyes lingered for far too long, the way his arms flexed as he chopped each piece of wood, the sweat that gathered on his abdomen even though it was freezing outside, you knew he was stunning but in this moment you were reminded of it. You stared long enough that his shadows alerted him of your presence. You quickly moved your gaze away, a blush creeping up your cheeks. But you knew he caught you staring. He placed the axe down before walking towards you. You met him halfway.

“Shouldn’t you put a shirt on?” You asked, not moving your eyes from the tree behind him.

“Does it distract you?” He cocked an eyebrow, a small grin on his face.

“Don’t see why it would.” You then looked at him. The second your eyes locked, it was as if he lost all confidence. You brushed past him, not wanting to waste anymore time around him.

“Where are you going?” He caught your arm, pulling you back to face him.

“To do our job.” You pulled his hand off you. Letting it fall back to his side. And to be far from you. “I will be back by dinner.” You moved past him again. Leaving him and the cabin far in the distance.

It was the same thing as the last time you walked around this camp. No one seemed out of place or acted like they were doing something they weren’t supposed to. But you weren’t ready to go back yet. Perhaps if you waited a couple more hours, Azriel would have left.

You sat down on a nearby bench, attempting to control your breathing. You couldn’t stop replaying the hurt look on his face when you told him the two of you shouldn't be acquainted anymore. Why did it have to be so frustrating? Why did your heart and mind have to betray you so? Why couldn’t you just move on.

You closed your eyes, focusing on the rapid beats of your heart and not the way his entire being took over your mind. To say you were annoyed was an understatement. It was as though the universe only wanted to remind you of the torment your heart had been through.

“You dont belong here. Females don’t serve a purpose unless they are in the kitchen or the bed.” A male spoke up, causing an eruption of laughter to echo throughout the camp. You opened your eyes, finding a group of males around you.

You stood from your seated position on the bench, straightening your leathers. “So what I’m hearing is the only thing in your miserable life that has purpose is your hand?”

The males fell silent. The one that spoke bared his teeth at you. “Let’s see what sort of warrior you are.”

“I dont want to hurt your manhood.” Your tone was stoic, unbothered.

“You truly think you can beat me?”

You looked at your challenger, he was twice your size, muscles filling each inch of his leathers. Scars decorating his face.

It's too easy. “Don’t go crying to your comrades when you get beat by a female.” You teased, stretching as the other warriors moved in tandem to form a circle around the two of you.

Widening your stance, you brought your closed fists up your face, watching as he did the same.

The male advanced first, throwing hits left and right, but with simple slips to each side, you easily dodged them.

He left his chest open instead of guarding his body the moment after attempting to knock you down. So you threw your fist, colliding it with his diaphragm, sending him flying backward, unable to catch his breath. He attempted to stand from his kneeled position, but you were on him in an instant. Landing a solid right hook to his jaw. You threw yourself behind him, holding him within a chokehold. There was a part of you that wished he put up more of a fight. The mother knows you had more anger to spare.

He tried to break free, but you held your stance firmly, pulling tighter on your hold. Until you felt those taps on your forearm, did you let go.

The circle of Illyrians around you gasped and snickered as you pushed the male off of you. Not sparing a single glance towards any of them as you walked out the circle, wiping the small bit of sweat from your brow.

You found your seat back on the same bench, watching as two males helped your opponent off the ground. You gave him a slight wave, smiling as he kept his gaze to the ground.

“That was quite intriguing to watch, quick and efficient. Good.” An unfamiliar voice spoke up from behind you.

You turned to face him. He was an older male. Dark brown eyes and gray hair. He wore Illyrian leathers but you had never seen him before. His wings had plenty of marks and scars from battles, but his demeanor was off, like he was hiding something, being somewhere he wasn’t allowed. Secrecy loomed over his entire being. He held his hands behind his back, staring down at you with curious eyes.

Overall, he made you uncomfortable.

“Thanks.” You turned away from him, hoping he would take the hint. But instead, he walked around, standing right in front of you. “Can I help you?”

“I dont believe we’ve met. What is your name?” The man questioned, kneeling down in front of you.

“Why does it matter?” You stood from your seat, avoiding stepping any closer to him. There was something about this man that had put your nerves completely on edge. Maybe it was the tone in his voice or how he looked at you.

You sensed his movements, the arm that was outstretched to grab you. Pivoting, you snatched his wrist. He smiled. “Such talent. And heightened senses. Is each member of the inner circle as talented?” His smile grew wider, and you dropped his wrist.

“Who are you?” You placed your hand on your dagger that you had strapped to your thigh. Moving backward a few steps.

But the sound of footsteps behind you made you turn, your dagger held firmly in your grip toward whoever approached. You found an Illyrian warrior, his hands raised in surrender. You lowered your blade, and when you turned back around, the other male had disappeared as if he wasn’t even there in the first place. “Did you see that man?”

The other male shook his head, looking around the area with you as you spun in all different directions. You re-sheathed your dagger, mentally noting each feature of the strange male. You would have to talk to Rhys about it when you returned.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m Surin.” He held out his hand, you took it warily. “I wanted to offer you a drink.”

“For what?” You responded, eyeing the Illyrian for any tells of something peculiar.

“For kicking Besian’s ass.” Surin smiled, his wings relaxing behind him. “That brute has been giving me hell for the last month, it was quite satisfying to see him laying on the ground so defeated,” You smiled this time, you could tell this male meant no harm. “So that drink?” He asked once more. You nodded, letting him lead the way.

Surin was an attractive male, though he didn’t look like most Illyrians. He had blonde curly hair and soft green eyes. His tan skin was painted with the few scars he had, but his features didn’t give off that war scorned look. You didn’t know exactly what he did or what battles he faced but the torment of death and suffering hadn’t taken over his soul yet or perhaps he didn’t let it get to him as the others did.

The two of you sat close around a fire he put together on the outskirts of the camp, drinking some liquor that he had in his tent. The sun had fallen far behind the mountains. The bottle you shared was halfway gone. You were dressed down to just your undershirt and pants. Surin brought out a light jacket for you to wear, but you enjoyed the cool air that hit your skin. The two of you talked about whatever. You found out he never wanted to fight. Secretly, he wanted to be a baker, but his family sent him to train anyway. “So your boyfriend is okay with you fighting random Illyrian soldiers?” Surin changed the subject, and you only looked at him with a puzzled expression.

“What do you mean, boyfriend?” You questioned, but you choked on your drink as soon as you realized. “Azriel?!”

Surin laughed, filling your cup with more amber liquid. “We all thought the two of you were together.”

“What in the world made you think that?”

Surin took another long sip from his cup. “He was constantly around you. The two of you seemed connected at the hip. He was like this overprotective guard dog to you. Anytime one of us stared at you for too long, he stared us down with such anger. It terrified everyone.”

You laughed in disbelief. “We used to be best friends. But we were never together.” It hurt to speak the truth, but it needed to be said. “And never will be.”

“Well good to know.”

You looked over the rim of your glass at Surin. His cheeks were slightly red from the alcohol. “Why is that?”

Surin leaned closer. “I know this is very forward of me, but,” He stilled inches away from your face. “Can I kiss you?”

Maybe it was the liquor or the stress of being back and the desperate need for some sort of relief, but you nodded. Surin moved the glass away from your lips, his hand reaching up to hold your jaw as he moved in to kiss you.

His lips were soft, and he moved with purpose. You moved your hands around his neck, his other hand resting on your hip. He moaned softly against your mouth when you combed your fingers through his hair.

Surin closed the remaining space between you two, pressing his body against you, lowering you softly onto the ground below, his hands explored your body, lightly trailing underneath your shirt as he deepened the kiss, it had been awhile since you had been with someone, the way he touched you felt new, exciting.

“Y/N.” Azriel’s voice broke through the silence. Fantastic. Surin started kissing down your throat. Placing soft kisses across your collar bone. You were shocked that the male on top of you was unphased by the sudden interruption.

“What do you want, Azriel?” You groaned. And Surin froze.

“Shit.” Surin whispered against your skin. You could feel his entire body stiffen against yours. You rubbed your hand up and down his arm to let him know he had nothing to worry about. You turned your head to look at Azriel.

“You told me you would be back for dinner.” His voice was emotionless as the two of you stared at each other.

“My plans changed.” You felt Surin snicker on top of you. Causing you to smile. Azriel scoffed, not saying a word before disappearing into his shadows.

You turned back to Surin, kissing him quickly. “Let’s go somewhere else.”

He nodded, moving off of you to stand, helping you afterward. He leaned down, placing a kiss on the spot underneath your ear, his hands sliding across your waist. Sending shivers down your spine. “Lead the way Y/N” He whispered. You grabbed the bottle of liquor, walking him back to the cabin.

The morning after your head ached. The sunlight agitating your eyes. You vaguely remember Surin leaving, kissing you goodbye before he slipped through the door. To be honest, you didn’t know why you slept with him. Maybe it was just a distraction, but however you saw it, there was no going back. But you felt no regret.

You slipped into something more appropriate before heading to the kitchen. Only to find Azriel leaning against the counter, a scornful look pointed towards your direction. “What are you looking at?”

“Who left this morning?” He asked. His hardened glare never ceased.

“Oh you don’t remember? You rudely interrupted us last night by the fire. After that, I decided him and I needed somewhere more private.” You stated, and something flickered over Azriels eyes, anger possibly? No that’s not right. Your head was pounding too much to determine anything. His silence didn’t help either. You pulled a mug from the cabinet, looking back at Azriel. “Do you want the details or something?” You teased, noticing how bothered he was by the fact you had brought someone to bed, he seemed to show it clearly across his features, yet he could only stare at you, so you thought why not see how far you could get with this conversation.

You moved closer to him, never losing eye contact. “Do you want to know how he bent me over? How I screamed his name as I rode him to our climaxes? Is that what you want to hear?” Your voice grew louder, and yet he still remained silent, his shadows slowly creeping up and around his shoulders. He wasn't allowed to be bothered by this. He has no right to be this way toward you. “What changed Azriel? You would never care about such frivolous things. In fact, you ignored everything about me, and now you feel you have the right to judge me for everything I do. How the hell is that fair?” The anger had broke free. You couldn’t tell if you were screaming or the room surrounding the two of you got eerily quiet.

“You can’t trust those males.” He seethed, fists clenched at his side.

“Stay out of my sex life, Azriel. I don’t question your choices in females.” You bit back, leaning back against the counter. “How about you fly back to Velaris, fuck- Oh, sorry. Make love to your pretty little fiance. Maybe then you’ll be easier to deal with.” Azriel flinched. You struck a nerve within the shadowsinger. You knew you shouldn’t add fuel to the fire, but you weren’t going to hold back anymore. He deserved this. At least that is what you thought. “Perhaps then I can enjoy the company of more males while you’re gone.”

Without any warning, Azriel was on you in two strides. He caged you against the counter, his firm body pressed against yours. He grabbed your hair at the base of your skull, yanking it backward, forcing you to look up at him. Your heart pounded within your chest, your eyes wide as you gaped at him. There was no movement between the two of you, only the feeling of your chests rising and falling together. His face was too close to yours, your lips just a small movement away from his. His scent surrounded you like a fog. His eyes darkened, and there was no tell to what his motives were. It felt right but so wrong at the same time to be pressed against him like this. You knew you needed to push him off, but your limbs felt numb. “Get off of me.” You seethed, but your voice sounded breathless. You could only hope he didn’t notice what he did to you. The air between the two of you was blatantly tense. It was like each of you had a knife to the others back, unsure who would stab first. Yet it confused you only more. Why is there even tension at all? If you could even call it that. Maybe you had been too close to him for too long.

His hazel eyes shifted back and forth as if they were studying each and every one of your features. Deciding what his next move was going to be. He looked down at your lips, but you twisted your head to the side as much as you could against his grip. His eyes shifted back to yours. “We have training in an hour, go take a shower.” His voice was hoarse as he released his hold on your hair, backing far away from you. “You reek of sex.”

You watched as he stormed out the door. You looked around the cabin, trying to distract yourself in any way possible. Your eyes drifted towards the sink, filled with dirty dishes and an empty plate. Next to the sink sat a plate still filled with food. Did he cook last night? A sudden rush of guilt fell over you, your head spun, nothing made sense. You wanted to scream, to cry, but his touch had left your body frozen. You needed to calm your thoughts. Your only hope was that the shower would help. “I will not falter. I will stand tall.” You whispered over and over to yourself before heading toward the bathroom.

When you walked outside, Azriel didn’t look at you. “Lets get this over with, I have an engagement party to attend in a day.” Azriel began walking, never once glancing over his shoulder at you.

“Sorry Mr. Shadowsinger. Don’t let me impede on your happiness.” You snapped, his shoulders tensed. You slowed your steps, creating a decent distance between the two of you.

A small group of new young warriors waited for you and Azriel at one of the training rings. They stared at him in fear but threw hateful looks your way.

“How is she supposed to train us?” Guess the events of yesterday didn’t reach everyone’s ears.

“She is highly capable of training incompetent males like you.” Azriel snapped. “We are going to show you basic moves of how to fight with a dagger as well as defending against someone wielding one. Afterward, you will spar with one another until you get it perfect. I’m sure you all are capable of that.”

You swore the Cauldron was cursing you. Couldn’t it have been swords. Something that would keep Azriel at a further distance. You sighed loudly before preparing yourself.

The two of you took your stance. Pulling out your dagger, you charged first, swinging downward at him before cutting upwards, Azriel dodged each strike beautifully, and it only pissed you off. You advanced with more aggression, and with each move of your knife, you added a punch, he blocked each of them until his steps faltered slightly, and you twisted the knife in your hand, hitting him square in the nose with the hilt.

You smirked at him, but his face showed he was anything but thrilled. He advanced this time, leaving you to block his throws. He was throwing various combinations at you, and it was your turn to slip up. Apparently, he wasn’t holding back anymore either, because with the hit to your stomach you had let through had sent you flying, your back colliding with the mud. You inhaled sharply, groaning as the pain grew over your body.

You saw him run up to you, an apologetic look across his face. But you were determined to show that he could not beat you. So, you swept your legs against his, knocking him down. You slid across the mud over to him, sitting on his chest, pinning his arms down with your legs.

You held the dagger to his throat, the two of you covered in mud, breaths winded and lost. And as he tried to break free from your hold, you felt it. The one thing you dreaded wouldn’t happen.

The damn mating bond snapped within your chest. It felt so strong that you thought everyone around you felt it, too. It filled your body with a light that was unwelcome. It consumed you like a wildfire, suffocating the air from your lungs. In any other situation, this was your dream. All that you had ever wanted. But damn the mother. Why now. Why him.

“Fuck.” You cursed. It was all you could manage to get out, the only word that replayed in a loop within your mind and Azriel could only look at you with confusion.

You stumbled backward off of him, dropping the dagger into the mud. Azriel’s lips were moving, concern filling his gaze. But you couldn’t hear a thing. It was as if your head was stuck underwater. You blinked a few tears that threatened to fall away as Azriel reached for you, but you ran.

Far away from what the Cauldron damned upon you.

Taglist: @honestlywtfisgoingon @fanfictioniseverything @marina468 @positivewitch @maviee @blurredlamplight @bookslut420 @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @elle10 @dragonstoneprincess @holywolfsstuff @reiincarnatiion @valeridarkness @feiwelinchen @sv0430 @kennedy-brooke @emturtles @nightcourtwritings @zephyg-06 @chantalleke91 @katherinereid @shadowsingersmate24 @shadowsinger-654 @nobody00sthings @lucyysthings @turkishgirlslife @tcris2020

(Tumblr is being weird. It won't let me tag certain people .-.)

[ijustliketoedit]

[violetasteracademic]

Master list here if you'd like to read the entire fic Golden Doe in a Valley of Shadow, or just enjoy this spicy scene that is perfect for this week's @elriel-month prompt! (there will be some spoilers and missing build up/context for the fic but live your life babes)

Thank you to @fauxdette a fellow Virgo who is unmatched at creating aesthetic vibes for graciously offering some guidance on how to make a stunning header!

If You Won't Touch Me

Chapter 4: Golden Doe in a Valley of Shadow

Word Count: 3,625

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Orgasm control, orgasm edging, light bondage

Elain

Elain knew Azriel was watching her the entire way home. The winged hound trotted alongside her, and it only made her even angrier how positively precious it was. His tail wiggled as he walked, adorably over-sized eyes peering up at her every so often. Jagged little shadow teeth ready to snap at so much as a bug that dared to fly too close to her. She half wanted to pet him.

I’m not going to touch you, Elain. Not with my hands. Not with my mouth. Not with my tongue or my teeth. Not until you decide that I am the only one who will have the privilege of doing so.

She began to shiver again, and it had nothing to do with the cold. Azriel knew exactly what he was doing. How he affected her. He had to know she was bluffing about calling for Lucien… He had to know he was the only one she wanted. And still he refused her until she could admit it. Until she could promise he’d be the last male to ever touch her. Prick. What an absolute prick.

She’d almost told him that was already the plan, that she could never think twice about another male after him. But he decided to play games, and she didn’t want to let him win. To give him the satisfaction of knowing she came running after him, ready to offer whatever he asked for. Once again, she had exposed herself. Presented her body to him like a damn cake platter and he still turned away.

She almost went down that dark road again, nearly losing herself to the madness of questioning her own sanity when it came to Azriel, but… he had exposed himself tonight too, hadn’t he? Even if you are not my mate, Elain Archeron, somehow I am yours. She tilted her head up to the stars and took a deep breath. Reminding herself of the things he said, and how she felt the truth of them deep in her bones. It was real. It was always real.

She was here. In Velaris. Walking home under the starlight with Azriel’s shadowhound at her feet. She had very little doubt that Azriel himself was trailing nearby, keeping to the shadows.

He thought he was her mate, even if she was someone else’s. She didn’t care about any of that. The mating bond meant nothing to her, less than nothing. She didn’t need such a bond to know she could want him forever. But… it seemed to mean something to him. It seemed to mean a great deal to everyone except her. She had been Fae for well over a year now, but she still struggled to make sense of how archaic it all was. The human lands weren’t that much better in how they valued women. It was clear to her now that Grayson likely only wanted her for her dowry. But if she wanted to say no to him, she could have. He’d have had no grounds to go to war or kill over it. It was always her choice.

She made it back to the townhouse and saw Nuala and Cerridwen waiting quietly in the shadows. Azriel must have sent for them. They each gave a slight tilt of their heads in question. Elain only shook her head and extended her arms, letting them shadow-walk her into her room undetected. Rhys and Feyre were blessedly only here for one more night before they were to return to the river house and resume their High Lord and High Lady duties full time after a long Solstice break. Longer than usual, due to Feyre’s pregnancy.

“We’ll be here if you need us,” Nuala offered before giving her arms a gentle squeeze. Elain nodded graciously, but did not request that they stay. She needed to be alone.

Her skin was still flushed after she removed her coat. In fact, she was burning up. Gods, had she come down with a fever from walking around in the cold? She didn’t feel sick, just… hot. Hot all over. Rage and frustration and need sunk so deep beneath her skin she thought she might lose her mind.

I won’t touch you.

Fine. That was just fine. He wanted to play games? Maybe it was time for Azriel to learn what it felt like for her to take back control. To make him putty in her hands for once. She walked over to the window and pulled the curtains open. She could see where Azriel’s cluster of shadows hid in the dark corners of the garden. Watching. Listening. There was no doubt in her mind he was there. That he’d stay until he saw the lights go out, and a long while after that to make sure she was safe. She unlatched the window and pushed it open. The shadows perked up at the motion and began slithering up the walls.

He had no idea what he was in for.

She kept the dim faelights glowing and waited until she could sense the presence of Azriel and his shadows at the window. She twisted her hair around her wrist, pinning it atop her head to expose her neck. She slowly pulled her nightgown over her head and dropped it to the floor, leaving nothing but sheer underthings and her thigh high stockings behind. She went to unclasp her bra when she felt hands made of shadow wrap around her wrists.

Elain. She heard the shadows whisper into her mind. Azriel. Talking to her in the way only she could hear. Not the daemati powers that Feyre and Rhys shared with each other. But… something else.

What? She sent back, shrugging innocently as the shadows swarmed around her.

Is there a reason you flung your window open to the freezing cold and started undressing for all to see?

My room is feeling a little too warm. I needed fresh air. And not everyone can see me, Azriel. She reached for the back of her bra again. She wasn’t stopped this time. Only you.

In an instant, her window slid closed and the curtains drew shut. Azriel, or the outline of his form wreathed in shadow, kept to the corner of the room.

“What are you doing,” Azriel asked. No amusement in his voice.

She lost no confidence. He had already shown his hand, coming into her room in the blink of an eye just knowing she was undressing. He could have stayed at the apartment. Kept his shadows quiet in the garden. But he was here.

“You won’t touch me. So I have to take care of it myself.” She dropped her bra to the floor. Azriel’s shadows guttered. “Is there a problem? I don’t recall that being against your rules.” She slid her panties down to her ankles and gingerly stepped out of them. She had to stop herself from grinning as Azriel finally stepped out of the shadows, his hands white knuckled at his side.

She reached to start rolling down her stockings when shadows shot for her hands again.

“Wait,” Azriel whispered, his voice thick and dark. “Don’t take those off.”

She looked down at herself, stripped completely naked save for the stockings. Clarity set her skin on fire.

“You like the way these look, shadowsinger?” She asked sweetly.

Azriel didn’t speak. He only nodded.

“Very well, then.” Elain turned her back to him, taking a slow stride to the bed and swishing her hips more generously than was entirely necessary.

She crawled onto the bed, exposing her entire backside to him. She heard him mutter a low stream of curses and she bit her lip before propping herself up against the pillows and letting her legs fall open.

She was already slick between her thighs. The sheer sight of Azriel hardening through his pants and clenching his fists so hard he was shaking nearly sent her over the edge. She had spent her entire life being made to feel like the only thing about her that was worth anything was her beauty. But no one, no one had ever looked at her the way Azriel looked at her. From that very first moment, she felt as if he saw past her skin and into her soul. And while Lucien occasionally looked at her like he wanted her, falling prey to the call of the mating bond, Azriel looked at her like he would die if he couldn’t have her. It scared her, how mutual that feeling was. But it also made her brave.

“Where would you start, shadowsinger? If touching me wasn’t against your rules.” She smiled coyly.

Her smugness evaporated when Azriel sent out a wisp of shadow to clasp around her wrist. Her mouth fell open, and he guided her bound hand up to her lips, pushing her fingers inside.

“Suck,” Azriel ordered.

Elain gushed as she obeyed.

One point to Azriel. Oh gods. That fast, she was going to lose this game tonight.

Her chest was already heaving as he used his shadows to slide her wet fingers down to her peaked nipples.

“I’d start here,” Azriel said. Calm. He was too calm. And Elain was already writhing as she flicked her fingers over the sensitive spot Azriel had guided her to, drawing tight circles around her nipples until they were sharp as cut diamonds.

“You’re breaking the rules,” she panted, but there was very little fight in it.

His expression didn’t change at all as he led her fingers down her sternum, her stomach.

“Am I?” His eyes glittered, full of filthy menace as he said, “I believe I said I wouldn’t touch you with my hands, my mouth, tongue, or teeth.” That damn half grin began to grace his wicked lips. “I don’t recall saying anything about my shadows.”

Elain nearly arced clean off the bed as he sent another tendril out for her free hand and pinned it over her head. He slid the hand on her stomach a little farther down, but not far enough. Elain’s hips bucked, and she desperately tried to push through the shadows. To press her fingers exactly where she needed them.

“Is this okay?” He asked quietly, flicking his gaze to where he had her wrist pinned.

“Yes,” she whispered. She watched his cock almost rip the front seam of his pants when she said, “Harder.”

She loved the feeling of being restrained. Of him controlling every inch of her body. Her touch. It helped her to focus and simultaneously lose herself entirely. She didn’t want to be treated like a glass vase.

She had no idea how to express that a little pain sometimes felt so good, but she didn’t have to explain herself to Azriel. There was no judgment in his hungry gaze, only understanding. His eyes lit with unrestrained desire as the grip on her tightened, and her hips lifted in response. He dragged her fingers lower, right where she needed them. He only let her manage a few strokes before he pulled her hand away. Elain whined in frustration.

“Azriel,” she breathed. She tried to lower the hand he had pressed just above the apex of her thighs, but she couldn’t budge. “Please.”

He pushed himself off the wall and stalked to the edge of the bed.

“Please what?” Another tendril slid across her, this one pinning her hips down and stopping her writhing and thrusting. She tried to rub her thighs together, desperate for friction, only to feel her ankles yank apart. Her legs spread to each corner of the bed and held firm. Oh, she was gong to absolutely ruin him when she had the chance. He wasn’t the only one who had restraints at their disposal.

“Please, Azriel. I need to, I need…” she babbled, but couldn’t finish as more shadows swarmed, sliding over every inch of her. They ghosted over her nipples, swept along the curve of her nape. They slid into her hair and gave a sharp tug. Elain bit her lip to keep from crying out. “Please let me touch myself,” she begged.

“Can you be quiet?” Azriel’s eyes were roving over her. At the black threads keeping her restrained. It only made her wetter. His eyes glazed over as they traveled, drinking in the sight of her bare skin wreathed in his shadows. His gaze snagged at the swollen bud between her spread open legs. She was aching and throbbing and soaking the sheets. She couldn’t withstand it much longer.

“I’ll be quiet,” Elain nodded furiously.

As if he saw straight through the lie, he enveloped them in a brilliant cobalt shield. She felt the quiet settle over her, the blue glow casting her skin in a radiant hue and the world outside of their little bubble completely cut off. She loosed a sigh of relief.

Azriel got down on his knees at the edge of the bed, nostrils flaring as he came eye level with Elain’s slick and pulsing center. She pushed and pushed against her bonds, but he held her down tightly. Watching him drink in the sight and the scent of her only made her more needy. She was going to burst out of her skin.

He moved her fingers lower again, letting her just brush over her clit. So light and teasing she wanted to scream from the lack of friction.

“Please,” she cried. She was moments away from tears pricking her eyes, that’s how desperate she was for release.

“Since you asked so politely,” he slowly snaked a shadow clean up her center. She gasped as it continued a slow, torturous trail up her body. Over her breasts. Lightly gripping around her neck. With one final cool grin, Azriel released his hold on her. She didn’t even bother to consider what she looked like or if her body was displayed in a beautiful way as she plunged her fingers down between her thighs. She lost herself completely, riding harder than she ever had before and grabbing at her breasts with her free hand.

“Azriel,” she panted, too lost in the sensation to feel ashamed or embarrassed by him watching her. She dragged her fingers in and out, pressing her palm hard against her clit as she pumped. She had done this so many times. Had thought of no one but Azriel for over a year. But to feel the phantom touch of his shadows lingering on her skin, to breathe in his cedar and night chilled mist scent while she touched herself… it was beyond any fantasy she could have imagined.

She was close. She wasn’t sure how such a thing could be possible, but she felt as though she could have come just from the grip of Azriel’s shadows, the sight of him watching her, controlling where she could touch. She had never teased herself like that. Had never pushed herself to the limits of sanity, riding the edge of need and being denied what she wanted. She hated it. And she loved it. Her mouth fell open and she moaned, thrusting her hips harder into her hand. She cried out, panting as Azriel sent his shadows roving back over her, skating across every inch of her skin. Tracing the sensitive inside of her thigh, swirling around her nipples that were so hard now they could cut glass. They threaded through her hair, gently tugging at her scalp, and she shattered.

Stars blinked across her vision as her climax crashed over her in wave after wave. She kept riding, kept moving and losing herself to the feel of her orgasm and Azriel’s shadows until it hurt, until she she was too sensitive, and collapsed on the bed.

Sweat beaded across her skin. Her mind buzzed and her vision was foggy.

Azriel’s shadows began to massage her scalp in soothing strokes. Her eyes blinked open.

He was standing at the foot of the bed again, his pupils blown and chest visibly heaving. His cock was absolutely enormous in the outline of his pants, and Elain’s mouth went dry as she pushed herself onto her knees and took in how large he was. She reached for him.

“No,” Azriel stopped her with both hands on her wrists. “Not tonight.”

“Why?” She asked. They were still shielded. He had kept her screaming completely contained. If she knew he could do that, she might not have waited so long to strip naked in front of him.

“I won’t be able to cover my scent. I’ve already been here too long.” His face looked truly pained as his gaze slid down her body one last time. He shook his head, attempting to clear the fog of lust.

“Come here,” he said. His voice was gentle now. All signs of that commanding male holding her completely at his mercy disappeared. She crawled to the edge of the bed, suddenly feeling self conscious about her nakedness. As if he could sense her worry, his shadows whisked her nightgown off the floor.

“Arms up,” he said. She did as she was asked. “Good girl.”

She trembled as he replaced his shadows with his hands to tug the cool silk down her skin. Then, he pulled her in close for a tight hug. He enveloped her so completely, and she nuzzled into him. Into the strength of his body. His delicious scent.

It was so calming, so tender it left her breathless.

“I wish I could stay,” he said into her hair.

“I wish you could too.” she buried her face in his neck and he tightened his grip on her.

"Elain?" Azriel asked, softly gliding his mouth over her skin.

"Yes?" She breathed in reply.

“Don’t forget what happens when you try to tease me,” he whispered against the shell of her ear. She shuddered, her arousal stirring once again.

And then he was gone.

Elain waited for shame to wash over her, but it never did. That moment he had offered, brief as it was, to hold her afterwards… he hadn’t touched her apart from that. And somehow it was more caring and intimate than anything she had ever experienced with Grayson. Grayson had a tendency to focus on himself in bed. To grunt and heave over her until he was finished, then roll over and fall asleep. More often than not leaving her unsatisfied and sneaking quietly into the bathing chamber to tend to her own needs.

Yet Azriel…Azriel had kept his eyes on her, as if simply watching her find her pleasure was a dream. A gift. He had dragged it out, pushed her to the edge of near insanity. And he had wanted nothing in return but to hold her.

She trembled once again as she replayed those last words whispered into her ear.

Don’t forget what happens when you try to tease me.

She certainly wouldn’t. She didn’t think she would ever forget a single detail of this night. She wanted more of Azriel. She wanted to kiss him. To feel is skin. She wanted him inside her. But she also knew he crossed some boundaries tonight. For her. And it was enough. For now, it was more than enough.

She went to peek out through the curtains and saw the shadowhound keeping watch in the garden. He waggled his wispy tail and fluttered his wings at the sight of her. Elain brought her hand to her mouth to hold in her laug, and waved. He puffed out a breath of shadow in the shape of a heart, and Elain’s own heart clenched in her chest.

For the first night in such a long, long time, she slept deeply and without interruption. The nightmares never came.

She dreamed of a golden doe dancing through a valley of shadows. She had never seen anything so beautiful.

[spideyns]

Feyre Archeron

like if u save/use or credit @evrllarks on twitter