#roman x addy x dean x seth

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 41

Chapter 41

            “I still hate this,” I said as I walked down the stairs toward the cage in the center of the gym. “Why do I keep doing this?”

            Roman tugged me a little closer to his side and kissed the top of my head. “Because you love him,” he replied. He leaned down and whispered in my ear. “And you secretly like the blood.”

            “Don’t you dare,” I hissed, punching him in the ribs lightly. “You know I freak out every time he gets out of that cage.”

            “When was the last time he lost?” Seth asked from just behind us. It had been a week or so since we’d kissed and were still figuring out how we would manage our relationship. In public and in private. It seemed that we were going to take our time to find our groove and our place in this.

            Roman chuckled and looked over his shoulder. “He hasn’t lost since baby girl here started coming.”

            Heat rushed into my face. I reached up to tuck my hair behind my ear as my heart skipped a beat. “There was that one against… what’s his face…”

            “He didn’t lose that one, Addy,” he teased. “Almost, but he beat the count. Knocked Jones’ teeth down his throat afterward. Literally.”

            Seth led the way down the line of chairs toward our usual seats. We’d been to so many fights that they were practically reserved. “You’re his good luck charm.”

            “I wish I wasn’t,” I murmured. “I hate seeing him bloodied and bruised.”

            Before any of us could say another word, music blared through the room. My chest constricted as my heart pounded against my ribs. I knew that Dean’s fight would be later in the evening, but I still couldn’t get my anxiety under control. I bounced my leg and rubbed my palms back and forth on my jeans. My palms were sweaty. For a moment, I thought I was going to be sick.

            “Why didn’t you let me bring my bag?” I grumbled at Seth after the third fight. I’d wanted to bring my backpack to get some reading done before Dean was up. Anything to distract myself from the worry that something would happen.

            Seth reached out and curled his fingers around mine. He squeezed my hand and brought it up to his lips. His lips were soft against my knuckles. “Because you’re going to be fine.”

            Looking up into his chocolate eyes, I thought for a moment that he was right. For that brief second, my heart settled into a normal rhythm and my agitated movements slowed.

            Then they called Dean’s fight.

            I gulped hard against the bile threatening to climb up my throat. This was the moment that I dreaded the most. Watching him come into that cage with his fists taped up, his face clear of scrapes, scratches, bruises, and blood. Knowing exactly what was going to happen in the next few minutes was enough to send adrenaline rushing through my veins. I wanted to run, to get as far away as possible. I wanted to slap him with the hope of knocking some sense into him because talking just didn’t seem to work.

            Dean appeared from the locker room in his jeans and boots. I couldn’t understand how he could fight in them, or why they allowed him to, but he insisted. At the door to the cage, he toed off his boots and pushed them aside. Barefoot, he walked forward as he rocked his shoulders back and forth. The muscles in his arms and shoulders flexed beneath his skin. He looked toward us, cornflower eyes landing on me. A faint smile curled the corners of his mouth.

            Then his gaze drifted, and his smile faded. His lips twisted into a snarl as he slammed the cage door behind him.

            “Something’s pissed him off,” Seth said, leaning toward me. “Was he like that earlier?”

            I looked toward Dean and then back at Seth. “No. He was… grumpy. Not this.”

            “Fuck.” Roman’s voice drew my attention. I turned to him, a question on my lips as I followed the line of his gaze.

            Dean stood on the far side of the cage, brows drawn together and jaw set. My stomach turned upside down at the rage in his eyes.

            The bell rang and he launched himself at his opponent, right arm already cocked back. The moment he was within reach, Dean threw his body into the punch. It landed square on the other guy’s jaw, knocking his head sideways. He stumbled backward, and Dean followed, pressing him back toward the wall of the cage. Dean beat into his opponent, throwing a series of elbows against the side of his head and jabs into his kidneys.

            He backed up, putting space between them. He pivoted on his back foot and let go a kick against the other guy’s ribs. His opponent blocked the kick and swept his other leg out from under him. Dean landed hard on his back, his head bouncing against the mat. I screamed and nearly jumped out of my seat. The sound must have gotten Dean’s attention as he turned his head toward me. His blue eyes were unfocused for a moment before the rage returned to his face and he rolled back onto his shoulders. In the blink of an eye, he had pushed off with his shoulders and hands to kip up to his feet again.

            Dean took a deep breath, cracked his neck on each side, and then curled his fingers in a bring it on gesture. I felt sick watching his opponent run at him, throwing elbows against Dean’s jaw. He followed up with a series of body shots that looked like they knocked the wind out of him. A deep red mark started to bloom over Dean’s left kidney and another along his ribs.

            My stomach clenched. I gagged. I wanted to run.

            Blood oozed from a split in Dean’s lip from one of the elbow shots. He wiped his mouth with his hand, crimson streaking against the white tape. I saw him glance down at it, almost as if he were fascinated at the sight. The distraction was enough for his opponent to throw a cross that rocked Dean’s head up and to the side.

            “Dean!” I screamed and lunged toward the cage. My fingers laced through the steel wiring. I couldn’t stop myself, even though I knew that he didn’t need any other distractions. A pair of arms wrapped around my waist and dragged me backward, practically ripping my fingers from their hold on the cage. I kicked and fought. “Let me go!”

            The arms tightened and tried to turn me around. “Addy. Addy, calm down.” Seth’s voice whispered firmly in my ear. “Relax.”

            “He’s hurt. Dean’s hurt,” I whimpered, clawing at Seth’s hoodie covered forearms. “Let me go. He’s hurt!”

            “If you don’t calm down, we’re taking you out of here,” he threatened softly. “You’re going to get him knocked out running at the cage like that. Relax, sweets.”

            Adrenaline rushed through every cell in my body. I couldn’t breathe. I wanted to run. I wanted to break into the cage to get him out. Even though the rational part of my brain knew that Seth was right, I couldn’t get past the sight of Dean so bloodied and beat up. It hadn’t ever been like this before.

            The sound of the bell reverberated through my bones. It sucked the air out of my lungs and the fight from my limbs. I sank back against Seth, grey edging the sides of my vision. I gasped for breath as tears rushed down my cheeks. There was no looking away from Dean as he stood on the other side of the cage. Red marks were already darkening into deep purple bruises. There was a gash on his jaw and another on his cheekbone, both oozing blood as his chest rose and fell as he panted.

            Our eyes met. For a moment, I thought I saw Dean’s blue eyes soften behind the obvious pain that clearly ran through his body. He looked back at me. Yearning lanced along my nerves. I just wanted to be where he was. He blinked and glanced away. My heart fell into my stomach as he squared up for the next round. Rage colored his features as the bell rang once again, launching him toward his opponent.

            I turned in Seth’s arms and hid my face against his shoulder. “I can’t watch anymore.”

            “Come on,” he said soothingly. “We’ll go out to the truck for a minute. Get some fresh air. It might help, sweets.”

            It was so hard to turn my back on the cage with Dean still inside. Since that very first time, I hadn’t missed one of Dean’s fights. I’d done everything it took to get there, to see him before he walked up those steps and after he ripped off the tape in the locker room. But now I couldn’t bear to watch. I couldn’t bear to listen, even though the sound of fists on flesh echoed against the rafters. My mind’s eye conjured up the worst possible images as Seth led me toward the exits.

            The moment we got outside, I doubled over retching and gagging. Seth rubbed the middle of my back even as he held my hair back with the other. The world spun around me. I couldn’t explain why I felt this way. Why, after all the fights I’d been to and how I’d actually started to enjoy them, I couldn’t bear to watch this time.

            “Deep breaths, Addy,” Seth murmured. “You’re good. Deep breaths.”

            I reached up and wrapped my fingers around his wrist. “I can’t—”

            He shushed me gently. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Deep breaths, sweets.”

            Muffled noise erupted from the gym. I could just make out the sound of cheering and the loud dinging of the bell that indicated a fight was over. I practically collapsed onto the sidewalk when I realized what it meant.

            “Stay here, just a second. I’m gonna go see what happened.” Seth squeezed my fingers before he went back inside. A few minutes later, he reemerged with Roman in tow. “He won.”

            Momentary relief flooded my veins. But Seth’s next words opened the floodgates of worry once again. “He looks like he got run over by a Mack truck. But he won.”

            Roman sank into a crouch next to me. “He’s okay, Addy. Dean’s good.”

            “Comparatively,” Seth interjected. “Phil’s gonna need six weeks in the hospital and some massive rehab. Dean just broke at least twelve bones in that guy’s body.”

            “Seth?”

            “Yeah?”

            “Shut up. You’re not helping.” Roman gripped me by the elbows and pulled me gently to my feet. Everything went grey and hazy as the blood rushed from my head to my feet. If it weren’t for Roman, I would have fallen right back down onto the concrete. “Dean’s fine. He’s a big boy and can take care of himself.”

            “I… I-I need to see him,” I whimpered. Before either of them could say a word, I ran toward the doors. My feet carried me away from the gym and down the hallway to the locker rooms. I pounded on the door with the flat of my hand, screaming his name at the top of my lungs.

            After a few moments, the door yanked inward. “What?!”

            My eyes lifted, taking in each inch of Dean and cataloguing his injuries. There was a rip in the front of his jeans that revealed a raised red welt along his thigh. His torso was crisscrossed with bruises that were already turning purple. The one over his right kidney ran from the base of his ribs all the way down to his hipbone. Another spread down his breastbone, and I swore that it was the size and shape of someone’s foot. His knuckles were busted and bloody. He had a split chin, busted lip, a gash on his jaw and cheekbone, what looked like a black eye, and another cut through his left eyebrow.

            Tears filled my eyes, spilling down over my cheeks and dripping onto my shirt. His face blurred, but not before I saw the angry disconnection in his gaze. I reached my fingertips toward his chest. He took a step back.

            “Are you okay?” I brushed at the tears and tried to take a deep breath. My clearing vision brought his injuries back into sharp focus.

            Dean crossed his arms over his chest, showing off a few other welts on his forearms and biceps. “I’m fine. You can go now. I’m sure they’re waiting.”

            I felt myself recoil just as if he’d shoved me. “What…?”

            He leaned his shoulder against the door, wincing as it put pressure on the bruise along his side. “Go back to the apartment or the dorm. I’m good. It’s about time you and Seth had a little alone time, isn’t it? That’s your timeline, right? Don’t let me get in the way.”

            Before I could say a word, Dean backed away and slammed the door in my face.

__________________

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 40

Chapter 40

           I sat in the armchair while Seth sat on the couch a few feet away. Several quiet minutes had passed since I’d kissed him, and he was still staring at the faded rings on the coffee table. I tucked my feet beneath me and let him think or do whatever it was he needed. Whatever happened, we had to talk this out. Otherwise it was going to ruin the friendship between Roman, Dean, and Seth. And I wasn’t about to let that happen.

           While I waited, I thought about the first time I met Seth—and I wasn’t counting running into him in the hallway that night—in the line at the school coffee shop. The first thing I’d noticed was his smile with that little gap between his front teeth. His dark, melted chocolate eyes. As we got to know each other, I’d grown fond of his sarcasm and his absolutely insane laugh and his coffee addiction that rivaled my own.

           Seth finally looked over at me, eyes confused and concerned. “Is this supposed to feel normal?”

           I shrugged. “It’s gotten to where it feels normal for me. I don’t know how Roman and Dean would answer, but they haven’t broken up with me or stopped talking to each other.” I let out a sigh and propped my elbow against the arm of the chair. “People look at us funny sometimes, but it works for us.”

           “How does it… work?” He gestured into the air at nothing, and I wasn’t sure what he meant. I quirked a brow. “Dating both of them at the same time.”

           A smile curled my lips. “It’s like having three relationships in one. There’s me and Roman, then me and Dean, and then the three of us together.”

           It was odd to see Seth Rollins quiet. He might have been a little shy, but usually his entire demeanor was rambunctious and gregarious. It was wide eyed and funny and fueled by triple shot espresso. But now, he sat there on the arm of the sofa looking at me. 

         More like looking through me actually. His eyes were fixed on my stomach, but I could see that they were unfocused. Far away.

           “Seth?” I asked quietly. I wanted to reach for him, but I was afraid to. He blinked a few times. As if he were waking from some deep and thick dream. His head tipped back. I felt the heavy touch of his gaze over my face. It was heady and terrifying. 

         “Addison…” His voice sounded thick and low when he said my name. I couldn't remember the last time he'd called me by my full name. Of course, we'd only known each other for seven months or so. Not long in the grand scheme of things.

           Seth took a breath. I watched his shoulders square. My heart took off behind my ribs. I was certain he was about to quietly and gently break my heart to pieces. I braced, ready for the blow.

         “How is this supposed to work?” he asked after another moment if quiet. “I mean, the three of you already have this… thing together. I'll be the odd man out.”

         My heart thumped hard before settling into something resembling a normal rhythm. I'd been so terrified that he wouldn't want this. That he wouldn't want to at least try. But here he was, cocky Seth Rollins, unsure of himself and his place in this strange tangle that Dean, Roman, and I had. 

         “It's honestly not very different than what we are now, Seth. At least, what it was before you decided to be a massive jerk and try to leave,” I replied with a small smile. I stepped closer and settled my hand against his wrist. The one with the tattoo of a burning page and the word forever. Not for the first time, I wondered what had made him get it. 

         He looked away, a self-conscious tilt to his mouth. “It was weird… how I felt about you. You were so happy with Ro and Dean and I didn't want to mess that up.”

         “Do you know what happened when I found out you were transferring? How I found out?” Seth shook his head meekly. I hated how he looked so unsure of himself. “I heard you in the bookstore. I was behind you in line.”

         His shoulders sank. “Addy… I should have told you. I should have had the guts to tell you—to tell all of you—that I was thinking about leaving. To be out of the way of all this…”

         I tugged his arm gently and guided him to press his hand against my hip. My other hand settled on his cheek. “Dean found me on the way to my dorm–I'd been avoiding coming here for days after I heard you. I couldn't bear the thought of hurting you by being here. Of coming between this brotherhood the three of you have. I fell apart sobbing on the quad when I told him.”

         “That's how they found out.” His fingers squeezed the flesh of my hip as he carefully drew me closer. After a moment, he leaned forward and rested his forehead against my collarbone. “I'm so sorry, Addy. I wish I'd done all of this differently.”

           I settled my hand on the back of his head. His hair was soft and frizzy, and I couldn’t help but stroke my fingers against it. “You’re absolutely stupid, Seth. You know that, don’t you?”

           He wrapped his arms around my waist, locking his hands together at the base of my spine. “It would be hard not to at this point,” Seth laughed dryly. He sighed.

           “You’re just like Dean. He was stupid about it, too,” I replied, scratching my nails against his scalp. Some of the tension seemed to slip out of him. “Dragged me to that stupid cage fight and pulled that stunt in the locker room. When all he and Roman had to do was sit down and talk to me. Like… I don’t know… adults.”

           Seth snorted. “There’s nothing about the three of us that screams ‘adult,’ sweets.”

           My heart skipped behind my ribs. He’d called me that a few times, starting right after that day when I ate all of Roman’s carb load snacks from the fridge. Somehow it felt like it had a brand new meaning now.

           “You’ve got that right,” I teased. “Roman’s the only one who had the balls to actually ask me out like a normal guy. The other two of you… you’re idiots. But you’re my idiots. And I care about you, Seth. As a friend…”

           He stiffened. “You kiss all your friends like that, Addison?”

           I smacked him hard in the shoulder. “Don’t interrupt,” I snapped. “Jesus, the three of you are ridiculous.”

           “That doesn’t answer the question,” he said with a frown.

           Frustration bubbled up inside me. I was overcome with the urge to pop him across the face. I closed my eyes and forced myself to take a few breaths. The last thing I wanted just then was to mess up whatever fragile little thing that was happening between the two of us. “You’ve been my friend for months now, Seth Rollins. And no matter what happens between us, that’s important to me. But I care about you like this, too.”

           I took a few deep breaths and let my hands settle on the sides of Seth’s face. My fingers tilted his head up so that I could look into those chocolate eyes. I slid my thumbs over his cheekbones before leaning over to press my lips against his. Electricity crackled up my spine as his arms wrapped tighter around me. My whole body felt hot and light in a way that was completely different from how it felt when Roman or Dean kissed me.

           Seth stood, and pulled me hard against his chest. His hands were rough as they slipped down my back to curl around the back of my thighs. I let out a gasp against his lips as he lifted me from the ground without warning. My legs wrapped around his waist and I dug my fingers into his hair, tugging at the knot of his dark brown locks.

           A thousand thoughts burst through my mind. I’d never expected that trying to talk to Seth would end up like this. But my heart beating hard behind my ribs and the breath caught in my throat was enough to make me lose track of everything else. There was just quiet and the warm touch of his lips.

           He moved with a blind practice back to the sofa, where he sank down against the cushions. He let out a faint sigh as he leaned back. My body tingled from the way his thumbs kneaded into the flesh of my thighs.

           “Is this okay?” he asked quietly.

           I smiled and pressed my palms against his cheeks. His beard was soft beneath my fingers. I watched his eyes as they brushed over my face. His mouth curled up in a smile that showed off the little gap between his front teeth.

           “What do you mean?” I replied.

           Seth pressed a kiss beneath the curve of my jaw. He breathed against my neck, nuzzling the tip of his nose against the skin. I slipped my fingers through his long brown hair. It was soft. With every move, the scent of shampoo wafted up around me. It had a sharp, deep scent that was heady in a way. I sighed and thought of dark chocolate and coffee.

           “I never meant for this to happen, Addy,” he said quietly. “All I wanted was to be your friend. I promise.”

           I couldn’t help but laugh. “Seth, you don’t have to explain anything. There’s honestly nothing normal about this. It doesn’t matter how or why or when. I’ve stopped trying to make sense of it.”

           “Just because I feel this way…” His palms stroked the outside of my thighs, thumbs massaging circles into my hips on each pass. “It doesn’t mean you have to go along with it if you don’t feel the same.”

           His eyes went wide when I laughed again. I cradled his face in my hands and gave his head a little shake. “Stop being so stupid,” I said with a grin. “If I didn’t feel the same way, I don’t think I would have kissed you. Now would I?”

____

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 39

Chapter 39

           Roman was quiet as we rode up the mountain toward the overlook. I was squished in between him and Dean. Spring break had started two days ago, and I wasn’t exactly surprised that Roman and Dean had decided to stay in town.

           Dean reached over and took my hand, threading our fingers together and settling my hand in his lap. He looked at me with a faint smile before leaning down to kiss my temple. “Love you, princess.”

           I smiled back, soothed by their presence. I let my head rest on Roman’s shoulder. “Love you, too, Dean.”

           Gravel popped as Roman circled in the lot and backed into a spot. He put the truck in park and reached back into the second seat to grab a pile of blankets. “Come on you two,” he said indulgently.

           Spring was slowly starting to make its way into the mountains. The snow was melting away. The mornings were crisp and cold and faded into an afternoon that was warm and bright. Some of the trees were starting to bloom. We sat side-by-side on the tailgate, wrapped in blankets in the quiet.

           “So, we talked to that motherfucker,” Dean declared suddenly. On my other side, Roman let out a faint snort of a laugh.

           “Talk might be putting it nicely,” Roman added, bumping against me gently. “But yeah, we had a little… chat… with him.”

           I stayed quiet, not sure exactly what to say. I couldn’t get it out of my head at how Seth was leaving because of me. There was no forgetting the fact that I’d broken up a friendship that was so tight that it was almost like they were brothers. Roman and Dean wouldn’t hear of it, and they’d argued with me vehemently for the last week that it wasn’t my fault. That Seth was being an ass, and that was a condition he’d suffered from far longer than he’d known me.

           Dean tucked his arm around me and pulled me in against him. “He’s not leaving.”

           My heart thumped hard. “Okay.”

           “And he’s sorry about his attitude, too,” Roman added. “He’s in a bitchy mood lately. He’s been taking it out on us just as much as you.”

           The way he said it made me smile softly. Dean squeezed me tightly. “Remember when I was avoiding you at the end of last year?”

           I spoke before I could think about the words. “Yeah. And then Roman dragged me to your fight and you kissed me.”

           “Uh huh,” Roman said softly. I could feel his eyes on me. Both of them. It felt like they were waiting for something.

           “But what does that have to…” The whole thing clicked in a split second. “Oh…”

           Roman grinned as he leaned over and bumped me in the side of the head gently. “He’s too much of a coward to say it to your face.”

           “I mean, in his own asshole way he was trying to be a good guy,” Dean added. “He’s an ass, and he thought leaving might be the best way to do it.”

           “Tell us the truth,” Roman continued, leaning over toward me. “How do you feel about Seth? Honestly?

           My heart ached. For a moment, I thought back to when Roman asked me the exact same question in that locker room last semester. How just the thought of wanting someone else when I had such a wonderful guy like Roman was enough to make me hate myself. Now I had Dean, too. I wondered anew if there was something wrong with me. Why couldn’t I be satisfied with Roman? Why was I so selfish?

           “Hey, princess,” Dean said, taking my chin between his finger and thumb so that I had to look at him. “I know that look. Stop it right there.”

           “Guys, I—”

           Dean shook his head. “There’s nothing wrong with you. How many times do I have to tell you that? Do we have to?”

           Roman slipped his arm around my back and pressed a series of soft kisses against my temple. “You are who you are, baby girl, and we love you. It doesn’t bother me that you love Dean, too. Or that you might feel something for Seth. You’ve never been anything but honest with me. Be honest with yourself.”

           I closed my eyes and sighed. “I feel like… you should be enough. Ro, you should have been enough. Dean would have been enough. The two of you together should be more than enough. But I feel like… like there’s something off inside me. Something horribly selfish.”

           “Addy, some people love differently than others,” Roman soothed. His fingers swept up and down my back in calming strokes. “You love so much it isn’t enough for just one person. And being with you like this has made me better friends with Dean. We’re closer because of loving you.”

           I reached out and took their hands in mine, pulling them onto my lap. Quiet settled as we looked out over the valley below. I tried to make sense of how I felt about all of this. I loved Roman and Dean more than I could have imagined I’d love a single person. Not to mention two. I was eighteen, in a new place hours away from home, surrounded by new friends and honestly in love with two guys. And they didn’t seem to mind. If I were to believe Roman, even though they had to share my attention, they were better friends now than before. Could it really be that simple?

           “I don’t know if I love Seth, not like I love the two of you. But I feel something for him,” I said after a while. “What if what I feel for him isn’t the same? If it isn’t what he wants from me? I don’t want to be the reason that the three of you stop being friends if it doesn’t work out.”

           “We’ll figure that out when we get there, princess,” Dean assured me. “And we’ll talk about it rather than one of us not talking to the others, yeah?”

           I couldn’t help but grin and duck my head. “Yeah.”

***

           “Go on,” Roman said as we sat in the parking spot in front of their apartment. He squeezed my fingers and pulled them up to his lips. “He’s home, and we won’t be far away if you need us.”

           Dean nodded encouragingly, cradling the back of my head with his palm as he pressed a kiss to my forehead. “We’ll be at the Red Barn, okay?”

           I took a breath and climbed over Dean to get out of the truck. “I love you both. You know that, right?”

           “We know, princess.”

           Roman brushed his fingers down my spine as I crawled over Dean, who gave me a firm, playful smack on the ass. I grinned back at him at the distraction. The moment my feet hit the gravel, I squared my shoulders and walked up the steps toward the door. By the time I knocked on the door, Roman’s truck was already easing around the corner out of sight.

           Seth stood in front of the open door in a black band t-shirt and grey sweatpants with his hair in a knot hidden beneath a grey beanie. “Oh,” he said once he realized it was me, “hey, Addy. Ro and Dean are out. I actually thought they were with you.”

           I tried not to look away. My heart felt heavy. “I’m actually not here for them. I was hoping you and I could talk.”

           He looked uncomfortable as he stood out of the way to let me inside. The television was on and was paused on a screen for a videogame. I remembered just before New Year’s and sitting on the sofa watching him play as I teased him about Becky Lynch. Now he looked like he didn’t even want to talk to me.

           “Look, Addison…”

           I closed my eyes, suddenly afraid that I was going to cry at the sound of my full first name. “Addy,” I said slowly, my heart skipping a beat. “My name is Addy, and you know that.”

           Seth sank down on the arm of the couch and practically put his head between his knees. “Did they send you here to let me down easy or ask me to stay?”

           “I was under the impression that you were staying anyway,” I replied as I sat down on the chair. “Why didn’t you say anything, Seth?”

           He ran a hand over his face and scratched at his beard. “What was I supposed to say? ‘Hey Addy, can I join your stable of boyfriends?’”

           Part of me wanted to laugh, but I couldn’t. “You could have just told me the truth. What was the worst thing that could happen, Seth? I tell you that I didn’t feel the same? We stopped being friends? I stopped coming over? Honestly, why didn’t you say something?”

           “Because Dean and Ro are my best friends!” he shouted at me, pain twisting his expression. “How do you think I felt knowing that I wanted you the way you want them? That I was in love with you?”

           I tried my best not to flinch as he shouted. He wouldn’t look at me, and I let him get it out. I remembered how it felt being so confused and scared. I knew how it messed with your head, and Seth needed to get his thoughts together.

           “I had to look at the two of them every day and know how they felt about you and then know that I felt how I did. The whole time, I had to think about how I had to be around you all the time and I couldn’t ever really have you.”

           My heart skipped one beat and then another. “And you thought running away was going to fix it?”

           He stood up, hovering over me. “Leaving my two best friends was easier than having to stay here and see you!”

           I thought of Dean and Roman and their confidence in me. Of how much they loved me. Trusted me. “Do I get a say in this at all?”

           Seth opened his mouth, but immediately snapped it shut. He leaned back on his heels, watching me as if he couldn’t quite believe what I’d said. “What?”

           “If this involves me, Seth Rollins, I think I deserve a choice.”

           He sank back onto the arm of the couch, the fight gone out of him. “I didn’t think you’d want one.”

           Without a word, I closed the space between us and tipped his head up with my fingers under his chin. I leaned down and pressed my lips against his. Seth rested his hands on the curve of my hips, almost unsure of what he was supposed to do. “I want a choice,” I whispered after leaning back. “The question is do you want to be part of this.”      

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 37

Chapter 37

           March swept in quietly, sneaking in beneath the drifts of snow that continued to blanket the campus. Astronomy labs up in the observatory were cancelled as the roads—even with a jacked up four-wheel drive like Roman’s—were too dangerous. Grand Mountain ran shuttles outfitted with snow chains and a detachable plow every five minutes. They were packed to the brim every time as there was so much ice that several people had slipped and fallen on their way to classes.

           I pulled a Henley on over a tank top, then Roman’s Pirates hoodie, and one of Dean’s old jackets. Wool gloves, a scarf, and a pair of waterproof boots were the last things I needed before I grabbed up my backpack and trudged down the hallway of the dorm. My right hand was still in a brace after I’d fractured it punching Seth in the chest. It made it harder than expected to not only wear my gloves but to carry my bag, my coffee, or just about anything else.

           The weather and the fact that both football and cheer competition seasons were over made me more than a little depressed. I was surprised to find that I’d grown to like the early morning workouts at the Cove, practices three times a week, and travelling with the team. Being without them sent me headlong into a strange sort of depression. I missed the people who’d become my friends.

           Now, it felt like I was stuck alone within the four walls of my dorm room. I felt scared and alone. And so sad.

           “Come on, short stuff,” Drew said from out of nowhere. He stood by the front doors in a purple fleece that would barely protect me from an air conditioner. “We’re not waiting for the shuttle. I’ll give you a lit up the steps again.”

           I shrugged. I saw the worry slip into place in Drew’s blue eyes, but I couldn’t make myself care.

***

           “You’re freezing,” Drew said when he sat me on my feet at the top of the stairs that lead to the upper campus. “You need some coffee. My treat.”

           “No,” I murmured, feeling like I was going to be sick. “I’m fine. I just need to get to class.”

           Drew snorted, his breath sending out whisps of steam in the cold air. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and tucked me in against his side as we kept walking. “You and Seth haven’t patched things up yet?”

           “I don’t know what there is to patch up. He won’t even talk to me.” I sounded more forlorn than I wanted. If I were being honest with myself, I missed Seth. I missed him more than I thought I had a right to, even though Roman and Dean knew about everything. They knew about how I felt, Dean had figured Seth out quicker than I had.

           My feet stopped without me actually telling them to. There was this feeling like being punched in the stomach. Like I was looking down off the edge of an impossibly high building that just kept getting higher and higher. Blood rushed in my ears. And God… I couldn’t breathe.

           I gasped for air. I clawed at the neck of Roman’s hoodie, trying to break the relentless choking sensation caught up in my throat. Without thinking, I thumped myself hard in the chest with my injured hand. I might not have had the ability to breathe, but I had enough air to let out a wail of pain.

           Whether it was for the white hot agony in my hand or the dull, desperate ache in my chest, I couldn’t quite say.

           “Addy, lass…” Drew said as his bag slammed into the ground, kicking up ice and snow. “This has to stop. Look at you.”

           He reached for my hand gently. With careful motion, he drew me into his arms, tucking me against his chest and resting his chin against the top of my head. I gasped one lungful of air after another, each one tinged with the crisp smell of his body wash and the softer undertones of fabric softener. As soothing as it was, I wanted the dark, sweet scent of Roman’s sheets or the unnervingly fruity scent of Dean’s shampoo.

           I hated that I wanted to just go and crawl into Roman’s bed. Or Dean’s. All I wanted was to just hide from the world. From everything that reminded me of the fact that even though I had two wonderful guys who meant the world to me—more than I deserved in the first place—I couldn’t stop myself from being greedy and wanting more.

           With every hour that passed, the more I wondered how they kept choosing to love me. Why they made me part of their world, even though everyone looked at us funny when the three of us were out in public together. If something happened to their friendship because of me, I would never forgive myself.

           “What can I do?” Drew asked, drawing my attention from my self-loathing.

           I struggled to catch a full, deep breath. My chest still ached as if someone had stabbed an ice pick between my ribs. Vomit clawed up my throat. I shoved at his shoulders, struggling to get away.

           He barely got out of the way before I puked.

           Drew gathered my hair up in one hand while the other rubbed slow circles on my back. “Let’s stop by the student center. Grab you something to drink and get you cleaned up.”

           My whole body vibrated with an anxiety that I couldn’t quite name. I leaned up against Drew’s side and tried to catch my breath. The cold air burned as it filled my lungs and threatened to freeze the tears on my cheeks. I ached like I’d been run over by a tank, so much so that I wanted to just collapse onto the snowy sidewalk and stay there.

           “Come on, lass,” Drew said as he swung my bag up over his shoulder. Then he tucked his arm around my shoulders as he steered me toward the student center. “Let’s go.”

           I barely had enough focus is to follow Drew into the student center. The heat rolled over me as we stepped through the doors. Noise echoed from the high ceilings. On the second floor, I could see people milling around behind the glass walls of the café. Everything was so normal. So… calm. I couldn’t wrap my head around how so many people could have so much peace when I just wanted to crash and hide.

           Drew steered the way, and I was stepping through the doors of the bookstore before I knew where I was. The line for the coffee shop was shorter than I would have expected on such a cold day. We fell into the line, my heart still pounding in my chest so hard that I was certain it was going to crack my ribs wide open.

           “So is it true?” said someone a few people ahead of us in line. “Woods said you were thinking about leaving.”

           “Yeah… I’ve tossed around the idea of going back to Iowa.” The voice that responded was familiar. I’d heard it more times than I could count. “I’m just not feeling it here anymore.”

           “Uh huh,” came the response. “Getting a little crowded in your place, hmm?”

           I swallowed back the scream that threatened to tear through me. It took more strength than I thought I had to just turn around and walk back out of the student center. Drew still had my bag—and my wallet and my keys—but I couldn’t stay feet away from Seth with those words echoing in my ears.

           My shoulders slumped as I tried to push away the sadness that engulfed me. I’d worried since the day that Dean kissed me in the locker room at his fight that whatever this was would come between Dean and Roman. They were best friends. Even more, they were brothers. I’d worried about pulling those two apart.

           I’d never worried about Seth getting wedged out of their friendship because of me.

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 36

Chapter 36

           I sank down onto a stuffed sofa in the lobby of Felton Hall. Jimmy, Jey, and Xavier Woods had taken control of the television and were playing Super Smash Brothers. They shouted and cursed and laughed until the entire building rang with it. I wanted to smile, but I couldn’t quite get myself to. Something felt off. It had felt off for weeks now.

           Ember plopped down beside me, turning so that her head hung off the cushions and her legs were tossed over the back of the sofa. She tapped her feet against the wall in a faint, uneven pattern. “You look like shit, Holloway.”

           “Gee, thanks, Ember,” I spat back sarcastically. My temper had been on a hair trigger for the past few weeks. I couldn’t explain it. “I didn’t know that.”

           Her eyes went wide and she blew a raspberry in my direction. “Get the stick outta your ass. You’ve won Queen Bitch for the month already. Charlotte is very upset that you stole her crown.”

           I rolled my eyes and let my head fall back. “I’m sorry, Ember.”

           She reached out and took my hand. “It’s all good.” We sat quietly for a while, both watching the videogame on the television. After a moment, she spoke. “Hey, Addy? Can I ask you a question?”

           “Beyond the one you just asked, sure.”

           Ember pulled herself up and turned sideways, sitting cross legged. She pulled her braids over her shoulder as she cocked her head at me. “You’re around the dorm a lot lately.”

           I felt my brows quirk up. “That’s not a question.”

           She sighed and dropped her chin to her chest. “Some of us… okay a lot of us… we’re worried…” She sucked in a deep breath and finally just spit it out. “Did something happen with you and Dean and Roman?”

           My heart squeezed in my chest for a reason I couldn’t name. I picked at my thumbnail. “No,” I replied quickly. Maybe a little too quickly. “Yes? No, I don’t know.”

           Ember stood up, her fingers wrapped around mine. She tugged me to my feet and out of the lobby. The sound of Super Smash Brothers faded as she let out a piercing whistle. “Somebody get McIntyre, Dana, and Sonya. And for god’s sake, make sure Sonya has donuts. Addy’s room in five minutes.”

           “What is wrong with you?” I snapped as I stumbled after her. I turned bright red as she yanked me past the big glass doors, where Xavier’s friends E and Kofi stared at us. “Ember!”

           She ignored me, turning toward me with her hand out as we stopped in front of the door to my room. She arched a brow—I hated people who could do that—and huffed until I handed it over. Ember wasted no time pushing me through before turning back toward the hallway and shouting as loud as she could.

           “McIntyre! Brook! Deville! Get in here. Now!” She ducked through the door for a half a second before poking her head back out. “Donuts!”

           She perched on the edge of my desk as we waited. It didn’t take long before the sounds of stomping and running could be heard in the hall. There was no mistaking Drew’s big fist as he slammed on the door. I crawled up onto my bed and hugged my pillow against my chest as he fell into the room with Dana and Sonya hot on his heels. Sonya balanced a double sized box of donuts on her palm.

           “What’s up?” my roommate said as she plopped the box on the mattress in front of me. I flipped the top open and grabbed a chocolate iced.

           I took my time, thinking as I chewed. Drew pulled out a chair and dragged it across the room. He turned it backwards and sat down, draping his arms over the back. Dana sat on the floor at Ember’s feet. They all watched me with worried eyes, even as I tried to stay quiet.

           “Anyone else notice that she’s been around the dorm a lot more than usual lately?” Ember said as she looked around the room. “Like… a lot more?

           Drew looked at me sideways. His blue eyes were soft and worried. “What’s wrong, Addy? Whose ass do I need to kick?”

           “There’s nothing wrong, guys. Ember is just blowing everything out of proportion.” I rolled up into a sitting position and licked glaze from my fingers. “What’s wrong is that you guys think it’s weird that I’m not on Roman and Dean twenty-four-seven.”

           “We don’t think that,” Drew replied smoothly. “But you’ve looked sad for weeks now.”

           I sucked in a breath, trying to hold back tears that seemed to come out of nowhere. Sonya hopped up beside me and put her head on my shoulder. “I see you every day, Ads. And I see you in class. You don’t act like yourself.”

           “The boys don’t either,” Dana said quietly. “I’ve got philosophy with Dean. He’s fucking miserable.”

           My head fell back against the wall with a thump. “I don’t like being over there lately. It’s not that I don’t want to be with Ro and Dean, but…” Tears made my throat burn. “It’s weird over there now. Seth is mad at me or something. Every time I go over, he leaves. Like immediately.”

           Sonya pushed a tissue into my hands. I didn’t even know I’d started crying. My heart slipped in my chest. “I stayed the weekend and he bailed to stay with his friend Buddy. I don’t know what I did, but he doesn’t even want to look at me or talk to me. When I go into the coffee shop… if he’s working… he pushes someone else to help me and goes in the back.”

           I sighed and sank against my roommate. A moment later, Dana and Ember had joined us on my bed—one of them on my side and the other tucked in behind me. The three of them wrapped their arms around me, hugging me tight. Drew reached out and took my hands in his.

           “Rollins is a howlin’ doaty scrote,” Drew snarled, angrily. His face went red. At the moment, I was glad that Seth wasn’t around. I had the sense that Drew would have knocked Seth’s teeth down his throat.

           “I don’t even know if I want to know what that is,” I whispered. “Nothing good, I’m sure.”

           “Damn right,” he replied, clenching his fists. “Have you told Roman and Dean what’s going on when they aren’t around?”

           Dana pressed her cheek against mine as I shook my head. She wrapped her arms tight around my shoulders and hugged me firmly. “You should. You know how they feel about you, Addy. It’d probably kill them to know you were so upset.”

           I dabbed at the tears still streaming down my cheeks. The next thing I knew, Drew stood up, practically knocking the chair over as he did. He gathered me up in a strong hug that made me want to cry even harder.

           “You tell them or I will, Holloway. And I’m going to break Rollins in half the next time I see him.” He took a deep breath, and caught my face up in between his large hands. “Nobody hurts my friends. Not even boyfriends.”

           Sonya made a scoffing noise, causing Drew to grin sideways. “Or girlfriends.”

***

           I looked up from the steps of the boys’ apartment as the sound of Dean’s Camaro split the quiet. A second later, he had turned into the parking lot and slid to a halt on the icy surface. The moment he opened the door he ran toward where I sat, shivering in Roman’s hoodie. Dean didn’t even bother to cover the car before snatching me up in his arms and carrying me into the apartment.

           The warmth hit me like a blast, and yet it didn’t stop the violent shivers that were wracking my entire frame. Dean dashed into his room and came back with blankets and the comforter from his bed. He tucked them around me, scrubbing my body vigorously to burn warmth into my limbs.

           “What in the hell is wrong with you, Addy?” he asked, his voice halfway between worried and angry. “It’s freezing outside. And how the hell did you get here?”

           I rocked back and forth, my teeth chattering. “W—wa—walked.”

           “Jesus fuck,” Dean swore. He kicked off his boots and climbed onto the sofa with me, dragging me into his arms, still bundled up like a burrito. “You walked all the way from campus? In this weather?”

           All I could do was nod.

           Dean was quiet for a long while. He snuggled me close, letting his body heat bleed into me. I tucked my head beneath his chin and tried to work up my courage. If either of the boys would understand what was going on with me, it would be Dean. After all, we’d started this whole thing out pretty much the same way.

           “What’s going on in that pretty head of yours, princess?” he asked at last. His lips brushed against my temple. “You look so far away right now.”

           I took a deep breath, letting the scent of snow and Dean’s cologne calm my racing heart. “D’you remember just before Roman brought me to that first fight?”

           His voice was quiet, but I could feel his breath as it stirred the hair at my cheek. “I remember hating myself because Ro is like my brother, and I couldn’t imagine hurting him. And I couldn’t stand to be around you, because it made me hate myself even more.”

           I squeezed my eyes shut. And yet, tears spilled down my cheeks once again. I was so tired of crying, but I didn’t know what I could do to stop it.

           “Seth won’t speak to me anymore,” I confessed at last. “Not in class. Not at the bookstore coffee shop. He hasn’t said a word to me since Valentine’s Day.”

           “Princess…” Dean turned me in his arms. He smiled sadly, his fingers brushing my cheeks. “That isn’t your fault. None of this is because of you.”

           I scoffed. “Feels like it.”

           Dean kissed me softly. “Seth is doing his best to be a good guy—a good friend—to Ro and me. I know how he feels, Addy.” He pressed another kiss against the corners of my mouth. “Tell me something? The truth… how do you feel about Seth?”

           My heart dropped into my toes. I felt sick. What the fuck was wrong with me?

           “Just like I feel about Roman. And about you.”

           Dean’s lips tilted up in a knowing smile. “Then we’ll just have to bring him around, won’t we?”

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion-Ch. 34

Chapter 34

           “So,” Seth said as he popped up outside my Thursday morning class.

           I jumped and let out a soft scream, my textbook and notebook slamming to the ground as I jerked my hands up to cover my thudding heart. My back hit the doorframe, and I had a momentary worry that I’d broken my computer.

           “Fuck, sorry, Addy,” Seth said, reaching both hands out to me. “I thought you saw me.”

           Before I could stop myself, I felt my fist slam straight into his shoulder. Pain lanced up my arm from my middle finger. It felt so sharp that I gasped in a breath and clutched my hand to my chest. “Jesus fuck, Rollins!”

           “I’m sorry! Are you okay?” He dropped into a crouch to pick up my books, looking as if my blow had barely phased him. “You didn’t have to hit me.”

           “You scared the shit out of me! You just showed up outside of my class and jumped out at me!” I tried to lower my voice. Honestly, I didn’t know whether I was angry or embarrassed. Seth held out my books and I reached out automatically with my injured hand. I gasped as I tried to get my finger to straighten.

           “What did you do?” he exclaimed.

           “What did I do? You scared the crap outta me! How did you think I’d react?”

           Seth wrapped his fingers around my wrist. “Dear God, Addy, you didn’t have to try to punch me! Did you break your hand?”

           “I don’t know!” I squealed, trying to snatch my hand back. It throbbed, and I swore I could feel my heart pounding in the palm of my hand. Then I just flat out swore. “Holy fuck that hurts.”

           “Shit,” Seth swore under his breath. “They’re going to kill me. Both of them.”

           He snatched up my backpack and shoved my books into them, throwing it over his shoulder. Then he slipped his arm around my back and sighed. “Come on, Addy, let’s get you to the doctor.”

           Seth led me gently toward the door. The scent of coffee beans and warmth gathered around me, reminding me of all those afternoons and evenings spent sitting around that coffee table and studying for our political science exams. It was like home—the sound of Dean making breakfast sandwiches in the kitchen, Roman turning the pages of a novel while he stretched out on the sofa, Seth grumbling about not understanding and saying he was going to quit and just play videogames. My heart settled into a faint and happy rhythm.

           “Come on, sweets,” he said as he took my good hand, tugging me across the quad toward the commuter lot. “I’ve got to get you fixed up before tonight.”

           I stumbled along behind him. Tonight. Valentine’s Day.

           Shit.

           “Seth,” I murmured in a sickly sweet way. “You wouldn’t happen to know what they’re up to, do you?”

           He laughed, and I realized how much I liked the sound. He looked back over his shoulder, his dark eyes bright. The gap in his front teeth was evident as he smiled. “It’s more than my life is worth to tell you that. If they don’t kill me for breaking your hand, they will kill me for spilling the beans.”

           “See, you said it yourself. You broke my hand,” I wheedled. “I would think that you owed me . Especially on Valentine’s Day.”

           “That’s not fair,” he shot back as he unlocked the door of a black RAV-4. “And you know it. Now behave yourself and let me take your ass to the hospital.”

           Once he was sure I was in safely, he shut the door and rounded the front of the car. I could see him mumbling to himself, looking halfway between excited and terrified. When he slipped into the car, he grunted and growled almost as if he were angry with me.

           “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I know you wouldn’t tell me anything anyway. You three are thick as thieves. Like brothers, but more than that, you know?”

           Seth reached across the divide and squeezed my hand. “I’ll tell you one thing. Just one.”

           My pulse jumped in my throat. What did I want to know? What was enough information but not so much that it ruined the surprise? I sighed.

           “Don’t. They’ve worked to put this together for me. I should be surprised.”

           He laughed. “I’ll be surprised if it goes off right. They’ve only been working on it since yesterday.”

           “What? But Dean said…”

           Seth pulled out of the parking lot and onto the winding road that lead to town. He drove carefully, as if he were worried of causing me any kind of pain. “Dean talks a big game, Addy. I thought you’d figured that out by now.”

           I sighed and leaned my head back on the headrest. A stabbing ache shot through my wrist and I gasped, clutching my intured hand against my chest. Seth reached over, fingertips gently brushing my knee.

           “It’s okay, Addy. We’re almost to the clinic.” His voice broke with worry. The pain spiked and my entire body tensed. Seth’s grip tightened, fingertips digging hard into my flesh. “We’re almost there.”

***

           Seth was grey as he sat in a chair across the room from me. One of the doctors had my arm propped up on a flat padded surface as he looked at my X-rays. He’d spent the last few minute trying to determine whether he wanted to give me a temporary splint or a full cast. The pain had faded substantially after they gave me some pain medication. Honestly, I was surprised that I was still conscious. Usually I was a lightweight, knocked out by anything stronger than Advil.

           “They’re going to kill me,” Seth repeated again as he leaned his chin on his fist. “Dean is going to bust me in the mouth. And Roman is going to break me in half.”

           “Oh, they’re going to do worse,” I replied, feeling a grin curve my lips. “What are they going to do when I tell them you tried to kiss me?”

           In an instant, Seth’s face went from grey to red to green and back again. He sat straight up, the line of his mouth tight. It looked as if he tried to take a breath, but choked on the air. “I… Addy… I…”

           “Seth, relax,” I teased as the doctor started pulling out a variety of items from several drawers. “I’m just joking. They’re not going to do anything to you. And if they do, I’ll whack them with my cast.”

           “No, you won’t,” the doctor said sternly.

***

           The door of the apartment flew open just as Seth and I hit the top step. Dean’s ginger hair was mussed, color high on his cheeks, worry in his bright cornflower eyes. “What the fuck happened?” he breathed, practically snatching me up. His hands cupped the sides of my neck, thumbs stroking the line of my jaw. “Are you okay?”

           I reached for him with my good hand and sighed. “I’m fine, Dean.”

           He pulled me into the apartment, his arm slipping around my back. He settled his palm on the curve of my hip as he drew me to the sofa. “Are you sure?”

           “It’s my fault,” Seth said from the doorway. He watched me with worry etched in his brown eyes. “If it wasn’t for me…”

           “Oh shut up,” Dean said with a smirk. “You scared the shit out of her and she punched you. It’s not your fault nobody ever showed her how to do it right.”

           I couldn’t help but grin as the color rushed back into Seth’s face. He sank onto the sofa beside me, close enough to touch. After a minute, he grabbed the collar of his shirt and tugged it down and over. There, just beneath his collarbone was a blooming bruise the size of my fist.

           “I’m pretty sure she knows how,” Seth teased, grinning. “It actually hurts just a little bit.”

           “Seth! Did I really do that?’ I gasped, reaching for him with my good hand. “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!”

           “Look at that, princess,” Dean said proudly. “Looks like you do know how to throw one.”

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion-Ch. 31

Chapter 31

           Sonya looked me over as I rolled out of bed. The spring semester had started a week ago, and I was still getting back into the swing of a functional schedule. My roommate grinned and pushed her ever-present box of donuts toward me.

           “Morning, sleepy head,” she said as she pulled on her shoes. “You’ve got twenty minutes before your first class starts.”

           It took a moment for the words to sink in. Then, I sat bolt upright and scrubbed my hands over my face. “Shit,” I groaned, stumbling toward the bathroom. My first class was on the far side of campus. It took fifteen minutes to get there on a good day.

           “Oh,” Sonya added as she shrugged into a warm jacket. “It’s snowing.”

           In the next moment, she had her bag and had already slipped out of the room. I growled and shoved into the bathroom. Thank goodness Dana and Ember weren’t taking up counter space.

           “That’s it,” I said to my reflection. “I have to stop going over to the boys’ place during the week.”

           My thoughts raced as I ran a brush through my hair and brushed my teeth. They were a rush and jumble of the memories and moments that I’d lived during the break. The drive back to see my parents for Christmas. Slipping and sliding in the snow with Dean. Driving up the mountain in the warmth of Roman’s truck. Watching the ball drop on the sofa smushed between the two of them, Seth hovering in the background like a shadow.

           I tugged on some jeans and a warm grey thermal shirt. Thick socks and my best pair of boots. I slipped Roman’s worn Pirate’s hoodie on and snatched up my backpack. I only barely thought to check for my key before I slammed the door shut behind me.

           “There you are,” Drew called from the other end of the hallway. His accent seemed thicker since he’d come back from Scotland. I liked the way it sounded. For some reason, it made me think of home. “Where’ve you been hiding, lass?”

           I smiled, even though my heart was racing with anxiety. “New semester business, McIntyre. And I’m going to be late for class.”

           He fell into step beside me, his loping pace matching mine. “What class?”

           “Philosophy of Religion with Professor Michaels.”

           “Shit. In Hardy Hall?”

           I nodded. “Even if I ran, I’d never make it on time. This is a great way to start the semester.” We were at the steps that lead up the hill toward north campus. I rolled my eyes and grunted. “I’m blaming all of it on Ro and Dean.”

           Drew looked up the steep stairway and grinned. “Of course you wouldn’t make it. Your legs are too short. Come on.”

           He turned and snatched me up onto his back. I tried to protest, but he wouldn’t listen. He just rumbled with laughter and took the steps two at a time. “Drew! Put me down!”

           What felt like half a second later, he deposited me back on my feet at the top of the stairs. “Cut through the basement level of Andre Hall, make a left onto the skybridge into Piper Hall. Down the stairs on the right and you’ll come out right behind Hardy. Walk fast, lass.”

           Drew grinned and gave me a gentle push in the shoulder. I grinned back and took off across the icy sidewalk.

***

           The snow continued into the early afternoon, the flurries turning into fat flakes that drifted down and settled into piles and mounds along the ground. I picked my way along the sidewalk and slipped into the student center, shaking snow out of my hair. The ground floor was packed with people, practically every seat filled with students and staff desperate for some warmth and a refuge from the snow drifting down outside.

           I fell into the line in the coffee shop as I checked my watch. It was just after one in the afternoon, and I was free for a few hours before I had to tramp over to the Cove for practice. My knee ached faintly from the cold and the walking. I wondered what Coach Helmsley would say if I dropped out of practice for today. Football season was over. Competition season didn’t pick up until the end of February.

           Keeping one eye on the line, I dug my phone out of my pocket and opened my email. I tapped out a quick message to Coach Helmsley and sighed in relief that I would be able to go back to my room, take a hot shower, and then crash in my bed with a heat pack on my knee.

           “Hey, Addy,” said a familiar voice. I looked up to see Seth behind the counter. He grinned. “What’ll it be?”

           It took me a moment to realize that this was his job, working in the school coffee shop. Of course, it shouldn’t surprise me the way that he chugged caffeine as if it were oxygen. I looked up at the menu and frowned.

           “You know what, I’ve got just the thing,” he said with a wink. He grabbed a cup and started bustling around behind the hot bar, mixing up a coffee like it was a chemistry experiment. I watched, trying to keep track of everything he used. But it was so involved that it was nearly impossible to keep up.

           A few moments later, he slid the cup across the counter. “Give it a try,” he said, looking sheepish and innocently hopeful. I held the cup with both hands, letting the warmth sink into my skin. I blew across the top of the liquid before taking a small sip. Heat and sugar and caffeine spilled into me in the perfect mix. I grinned. “You like it?”

           I felt my whole body relax. “This is heaven in a cup, Rollins. You’ll have to teach me how to make it.”

           He grinned broader and I could have sworn that he blushed. “Can’t do that, Ads. If you know the secret, you’ll won’t come back again.”

           I leaned against the counter, oblivious to the line piling up behind me. “I doubt it. Seems like there’s more reasons for me to come by more often.” I felt the heat rush into my cheeks as I dug out my ID card. I cleared my throat. “How much?”

           Seth smiled, showing off a slight gap in his front teeth. His brown eyes were bright as he waved his hand dismissively. “It’s on me.”

           I smiled sheepishly and ducked my head. “Thanks, Seth,” I replied, stuffing the card back into my pocket. “Hey, tell Ro and Dean that I’ll be over Friday night. No more weeknights hanging out with you guys. I almost missed my first class this morning. Again.”

           He nodded, glancing sideways to check the line. He sighed and stepped back toward the register. “I’ll let them know. Dean’ll be crushed.”

           I backed away, holding the coffee as if it was a precious. “He’ll get over it. See you this weekend!”

           I climbed the stairs to the second floor. The cafeteria was packed with people and the scent of food drifted out every time someone opened the doors. I peered through the glass walls, trying to find Roman’s dark hair or Dean’s black beanie. When I couldn’t find either one of them, I took another flight of stairs up to the top floor of the student center. A row of tables lined the edge of the balcony—two tops that were cluttered with textbooks, laptops, lunch wrappers. I passed by, all of them taken. There were a few study rooms that overlooked the courtyard, and luckily one of them was open.

           It was one of the ones with one wall made of nothing but windows. I pulled the table as far from the window as I could, and tucked myself into the corner. It only took a moment to spread out my books and my laptop, the coffee Seth made sitting close by. Only a week into the semester, and I was already drowning in homework.

***

           “Hey,” Seth said from the doorway of the study room. “You found my hideaway.”

           I looked around, slightly bewildered. I’d lost track of time reading and working on a paper for English. “Sorry,” I replied, grabbing at my books and papers and starting to shove them into my backpack. “I’ll head out.”

           “Nah,” he said as he tossed his bag on the table and sank down in a chair right across from me. “Not many people use this room, so I come here after work. I can get more things done here than I can at home.”

           I grinned softly, thinking about Roman and Dean. My body filled with warmth at the thought of them. “Yeah, I can see how difficult it would be to focus with Dean around.”

           “Put the two of us together and we go nuts,” Seth added with a chuckle. “I’m surprised Roman’s put up with us as long as he has.”

           “You guys are his brothers,” I replied, pulling a stack of notes from my bag. “So… too bad we don’t have a class together this semester.”

           Seth’s brown eyes went slightly sad. “Yeah, I had to track my major. Business classes suck.”

           I laughed quietly. “Then why are you a business major?”

           “I want to open my own business someday. A coffee shop maybe.”

           “Well,” I picked up the now empty cup from earlier, “if it all tastes like this, you’ll make a killing.”

           “Thanks, Addy,” Seth whispered. “That means a lot.”

           He smiled and dipped his head toward his laptop.

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Welcome to Oblivion-Ch. 25

Chapter 25

           I sat on the floor, back propped against the sofa, books and laptop spread out on the coffee table at the apartment. Seth sat across from me with his own books, his head resting on his hands. Roman was stretched out on the sofa behind me, his fingers stroking idly against my shoulder as he thumbed through his sociology notes.

           “There is no fucking way I’m going to pass this test,” Seth lamented, practically bouncing his head against the table. “I will gladly take my cal physics exam a hundred times if I don’t have to take this one.”

           “Stop bitching,” I said with a smile. “You’re making it harder than it really is. Now, tell me the four categories of international relationships.”

           Seth reached for his textbook, but I swatted his hand away before he could grab it. I glared, lifting a brow. He tipped his head back and stared at the ceiling. He groaned. “Pure antagonistic, pure cooperative, moderated cooperative, and…”

           He scrubbed his hand over his jaw, thinking hard. I knew that he knew the answer, but Seth had no self-confidence when it came to this class. I had no idea why, and I’d made it my personal mission to ensure that he worked his ass off and passed the class.

           “Fuck,” he groaned. “I don’t remember.”

           “Intermediary affected antagonistic,” Roman said lazily from the sofa.

           I turned around, surprised that he had any idea of the answer. “How the hell?”

           He grinned at me, his dark eyes going playful. “Corbin took the class last year. He talked to himself during workouts to study. We were weight partners, so I basically learned everything he did.”

           “He still got his notes? Tests?” Seth said hopefully.

           Roman opened his mouth to answer, but snapped his jaw shut when he saw the look on my face. He cleared his throat and went back to his own studying. “Don’t think so. Corbin’s not the type to hang on to shit like that.”

           Across the table, Seth deflated. I gave him a sympathetic look. “Hey, you pass this test Rollins, and coffee’s on me for a week. You get an A, and I’ll buy it for a month.”

           He turned those brown eyes on me. “Are you bribing me with caffeine, Addy?”

           Grinning, I nodded.

           “Challenge accepted.”

***

           Dean opened the door almost as soon as Seth thumped his foot against it. He couldn’t open the door on his own, mostly because he held a Frappuccino in one hand and was using the other to keep me steady on his back. I’d jumped on his back as soon as we got back to the apartment, having found a hole in my shoe that let snow seep in onto my socks.

           “What the fuck?” Dean asked, standing to the side as Seth ducked in the door and squatted so I could slide off his back.

           I held up my foot, showing him the huge gap where my neon socks were visible. “Jesus shoe.” When Dean looked at me like I was insane, I laughed. “It’s holey, get it? Holy?”

           He rolled his eyes and threw his arm around my neck, drawing me close against him. I smiled and tilted my face up, meeting his lips with my own. Warmth spread through me. It was the feeling I always got with Dean. It was the sense of a perfect early summer night.

           “What am I going to do with you?” he asked with a smile.

           I kicked off my shoes and tugged him toward the kitchen. “Make me one of those sandwiches of yours. We’re celebrating.”

           Dean popped open the fridge, rummaging around. “Hmm? What are we celebrating?”

           Seth swept into the kitchen and hopped up on the counter, half finished frappe in his hand. He grinned. “Addy’s contribution to my caffeine addiction,” he said playfully. He held his cup out toward me in a salute. “Because of her, I got a ninety-three on my international politics test.”

           I grinned and tapped my cup against his. I leaned against the sink, feeling incredibly proud. “You put in the work,” I said firmly. “I just kicked you in the ass to get you started.”

           A gust of cold air swept in as Roman threw open the door. There was snow in his dark hair as he kicked off his shoes and threw his bag on the floor. When he saw me in the kitchen, his face lit up. “Hey, baby girl,” he boomed, crossing the room in a few strides and picked me up in a warm, steady hug. He kissed me soundly, smiling. “What are you doing here?”

           “Celebrating,” I replied, dusting the snow from his hair and his beard. “We both got A’s on our politics test.”

           Roman looked at Seth, who nodded and grinned. “No shit!” He crossed over and gave Seth one of those guy hugs. The ones that start as an odd high-five and end in that one-armed slap on the shoulder. “Congrats, uce.”

           Seth gestured toward me with his cup. “It’s Addy. Wouldn’t have passed without her.”

           The look Roman gave me made my heart light up with love. He smiled and it made his dark eyes sparkle and shine. A moment later, he pulled me against his chest, wrapping his arms around me, hands clasped at the base of my spine. I snuggled against his bulk, tucking my arms between us. When he spoke, his voice vibrated through me.

           “Yeah, Addy’s amazing.” His lips settled against my hair. “That’s why she’s la’u Fetu e Tasi.”

           I closed my eyes and tucked my head beneath his chin. He was warm and smelled like outdoors and mint.

           “Alright, out of my kitchen,” Dean ordered abruptly. “I can’t make breakfast sandwiches for dinner if you three are in the way.”

***

           Dean pulled right to the door of Felton Hall. He’d borrowed Roman’s truck to get me back to campus. Apparently, while he was comfortable driving his Charger in the snow, he didn’t like to do it. The salt fucked up the paint he said.

           The inside of the truck was warm and cozy. For some reason, I had the sudden thought that it smelled like fresh bread. One of Dean’s breakfast sandwiches was wrapped up in aluminum foil and tucked into the pocket of my hoodie. He’d made an extra for me to bring back home as a snack.

           “Hey,” I said quietly, tucking my hair behind my ears. My heart thumped in my chest. I had thoughts and words swirling around in my head, but I couldn’t figure out how to get them out. “Can I ask you a question?”

           He turned in the driver’s seat and looked at me with those denim eyes of his. His gentle fingers brushed against my cheek. “What’s up, princess?”

           I looked away, feeling my whole body start to overheat. I was embarrassed by the question… the request. What if they thought the worst? What if this ruined everything?

           “Are you okay?” he inquired, stroking his thumb along my jaw. He moved as close as he could. “What’s going on in that head of yours, Addy?”

           It was now or never. I couldn’t explain why, but it just felt easier to talk about this with Dean. My eyes squeezed shut, courage gathering in my chest. “Have you ever thought about you and me… and Ro? Together? At the same time?”

           Quiet, heavy and thick, settled in the enclosed cab. It felt like my heart was going to pound straight past my ribs. My stomach dropped. I felt sick, terrified of what might happen when he spoke.

           “Is it something you want?” he asked. Dean settled his hand on the side of my throat, thumb against my jaw, fingers in my hair at the nape of my neck.

           Tears burned my eyes. I wanted to sob, but I couldn’t make them come. Instead, all I could focus on was the gentleness in his touch and the soft understanding in his voice. His fingers steadied my pulse, the contact a promise that I wasn’t alone. That he was there. And that he loved me.

           “Yes,” I replied quietly. I could sense the hurt in my own voice. The fear and sadness. The ache at the possibility of losing either of them.

           His lips pressed against my forehead, lingering there as he cradled my head with his fingers. “Then the three of us need to talk about it together. If it’s something you want, we can figure it out.”

           My fingers twisted up in the front of his shirt. “You aren’t mad at me?”

           “Princess, there’s nothing wrong with what you want,” he said firmly. “I’d rather you tell us than be unhappy. And besides, why would I be mad at you? Anytime I get to see you naked and writhing is a good time.”

           I laughed, just enough that it broke the heaviness of the moment. “Even if it means seeing Ro naked, too?”

           Dean waved his hand in dismissal. “Wouldn’t be the first time. We all share a bathroom, remember?”

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 13

Chapter 13

           Roman’s hand skimmed over my ribs, his fingers curling around against my back, his thumbs brushing agonizingly beneath my breast. He pulled me in closer and settled his mouth against my throat. The mix of his soft, warm lips and the scratch of his beard was dizzying. I whimpered and dug my nails into his triceps, fighting to stop myself from begging him for more.

           He swept his thumb against my breast and I shuddered, bottom lip caught between my teeth. He nipped at the cord of muscle on the side of my throat and wrapped his arms around me, rolling onto his back. I splayed out on top of him, knees settling on both sides of his hips. The weight and strength of his hands gripped at my waist, sliding upward to cup my ribs… so close to the tender skin that I desperately wanted him to touch.

           My hair had come loose from its band and hung around my face in messy tangles. He watched me with dark eyes as I curled my fingers around his wrists, trying to tug his hands upward.

           “What do you want, baby girl?” Roman murmured softly, his voice pitched low and rough. He held me tight, enough to let me know he was in control but not enough to hurt. There was something beautiful in the sweet strength he used. “Tell me.”

           I looked down at him, whimpering softly, fighting the urge to roll my hips and grind against him. There was no hiding the hard on that pressed against my center. My whole body burned from the inside out.

           I couldn’t breathe. The force of my desire slammed into my chest. Roman sat up, keeping his hold firmly. A moment later, his mouth was on mine again. Slow and insistent… commanding and devastating. My heart was ready to burst out of my chest.

           “Use your words,” he directed, his hands sliding down and slipping underneath my shirt. They took up their previous position curled around my ribs. He scratched his thumbnails beneath the edge of my bra, pushing it up so that he could touch me skin-on-skin. Just that faint brush was enough to make me let out a whine. “Tell me what you want, Addy. I promise you, baby girl, you’ll get whatever you want.”

           My shaking fingers dug into his hair while I tried to work up my courage. I wanted more than I had a right to, but I couldn’t run away from the sheer strength of it. Roman watched me fight with myself, his hold firm, his fingers swiping teasingly at my flesh, waiting for my permission. This desire in me was greater than anything I’d felt before, but there was a deep-seated certainty in me that Roman could tame it with ease.

           I closed my eyes and opened my mouth to speak, to beg.

           Roman flexed his fingers, squeezing me enough to get my attention. My gaze snapped to his. It was clear without him saying it. I was going to look him in the eye and beg.

           “I… I don’t know… I want…” I took a breath, licked my lips. His pupils widened as he watched the path of my tongue. “I need you… I don’t care how. I just need you.”

           My hips rolled on their own, grinding me down against his cock. I blushed at the sound that came out of me. “Please, Ro,” I breathed, looking him straight in the eye. “Take me… however you want… just do it.”

           Roman gave me a long, slow smile that made his face light up. In an instant, he swept his hands upward, taking my shirt over my head. He groaned appreciatively as he hooked one arm around my waist, hand splayed over my ass, dragging my core against him. His other hand made quick work of unhooking my bra and tossing it over the edge of the bed.

           He kept our hips pressed tight together as he nuzzled the space between my breasts. I whimpered desperately as he nipped the flesh of my breasts gently, soothing the sting away with a flick of his tongue and the lingering touch of his lips. I dug my fingers in his hair, pulling him against my skin, beyond desperate to feel his skin on mine.

           As if he knew exactly what I needed, he leaned back and tugged his shirt off. I pressed my palms to his shoulders, trailed my fingers down the designs that covered the right side of his chest. He licked his lips and I lost myself.

           I kissed him with everything that was burning and yearning inside me. A rumble went through his chest as he dragged me against his chest, hands in my hair and on my back and gripping hard at my ass. I bucked against him, my whole body going white hot and out of control.

           Roman flipped me onto the mattress and sat up between my legs. He took his time undoing his belt and pulling it through the loops of his jeans. I watched every move, enthralled by how muscle rippled beneath his skin. He folded the belt in half in his fist and trailed the edge of it along my stomach before tossing it away. For a moment, I wondered what the snap of the leather would feel like.

           The idea was lost when his fingers worked nimbly to pop the button on my jeans and drag down the zipper. “Up,” he commanded, gripping my jeans and underwear in his fists. I lifted my hips and held my legs up so he could strip them off. There was a smirk on his lips as he looked down at me. “Now, put those pretty legs up on my shoulders, baby girl.”

           My skin tingled as I did as I was told. He pressed gentle kisses and gave playful nips to my calves, my knees, my thighs. He took his time stretching out on his stomach, my legs over his shoulders. Roman wrapped his arms around my thighs to hold my legs open and dipped his head. Fireworks burst along my skin as he swept his tongue up my core, lapping slowly and teasingly. I tried not to make a sound, but he seemed to know. He responded by wrapping his lips around my clit, sucking it into his mouth and flicking his tongue rapidly against it.

           I squealed, my thighs quivering as I tried to snap them closed. Roman’s hold was tight and solid. He growled against my core, sending vibrations cascading through every cell of my body. He devoured me completely, every move of his mouth and flick of his tongue pushing me toward the edge of desperation. I needed this moment more than I could fathom.

           His hand slithered around beneath my thigh. I shuddered as he worked one finger then two inside me. He curled them forward, fluttering against a spot that made my body go weak. My limbs tightened almost painfully and then… an explosion rattled through me. I writhed on the bed, the sensations never fading, only pushed higher and coiling tighter as Roman kept pumping his fingers into me, kept suckling on my clit until I didn’t remember my own name.

           A second orgasm followed fast on the heels of the first. I whimpered, whined, finally screamed his name, my fingers somehow tightly wound in his hair.

           He slipped away from me slowly. My eyes fluttered open in time to watch him lick the taste of me from his fingers. I panted, surprised at how exhaustion had settled in my limbs. And yet, that ache was still there, still pining, still desperate.

           He smiled slowly as he settled my legs back onto the bed. Roman was still slotted firmly between my thighs, the denim of his jeans almost too much for my overstimulated body. He smoothed his hands over my stomach, up and around my ribs, along the outside of my thighs. The touch was calming after the riot of sensation.

           Roman leaned over me, bearing his weight on his fist. “Good, but not enough, hmm?” His free hand skimmed over my cheek and down my jaw. His thumb ghosted along my collarbone. “Do you need more, Addy?”

           I blushed even as I nodded vigorously. He laughed, and the sound cut straight to the seat of this desire. In a smooth move, he rolled off the bed and dug through a drawer. I watched his back flex as he stripped out of his clothes. Something ripped, then the sound of foil being crumpled.

           He climbed back onto the bed and sat against the pillows. He trailed his fingers along my skin, up between my breasts, and turned my face toward him. “Come here,” he ordered, the strength in his voice turning me to jelly even as I did as he asked. I got up on my knees and crawled toward him. He drew me into a kiss that bruised my soul, picked me up, and sat me on his lap.

           I cried from frustration as I felt his cock push against me. Roman swiped his thumbs beneath my eyes, wiping the tears away. “Shh, baby girl,” he soothed, lifting me up with one arm as he positioned himself with the other. He let me down gently, his cock pushing into me agonizingly slow. “I promised you, Addy. You’ll get everything you want.”

           My hands settled on his shoulders as he bottomed out. I trembled in his arms, my forehead pressed against his, gaze locked with his dark black eyes. His arms were tight around me, holding me so that our skin touched everywhere possible. Roman kissed me slowly, his tongue exploring my mouth as my hips started to rock.

           “That’s it,” he praised, dragging his hand through my hair, gathering it up in his fist and soothing it down my back. He bucked up into me, meeting every move of my hips. “Ride me, baby girl. Just like that.”

           His head fell back, and I took the opportunity to press my mouth to his throat, licking the taste of sweat from his skin. Roman let a stream of praise and pleading spill past his lips, his body pressed to mine, his cock stretching and filling me, feeding the flame that sparked to life in my core. It bubbled up through my limbs, boiled my blood, sizzled along my nerves.

           “Come for me,” he growled against my ear. “Come on my cock. Let me see that beautiful face you make again.”

           I ran headlong over the edge of an abyss. My nails dug hard into his shoulders as I bucked and jerked, his hips still snapping against mine relentlessly, never losing his rhythm. The ache within me quieted, commanded into submission by Roman’s touch. I held onto him, arms wrapped around his neck as he thrust through my orgasm, his own following quickly after.

           He didn’t let go, even as the sweat dried on our skin and my thighs started to burn with strain. Roman curled me against him, my head pillowed on his shoulder, his fingers drifting softly through my hair. I felt his lips ghosting over my cheek, the corner of my mouth. A heavy haze settled over me, and all I wanted was to sleep wrapped up in his gentle power.

           “I promise you,” Roman whispered a while later as we lay curled beneath the blankets. I’d found my underwear, and he’d slipped me into one of his worn t-shirts. He had me wrapped up in his arms, half draped over him with my head on the center of his broad chest. “Whatever you want, you can have, Addy.”

           My heart squeezed tight in my chest. Words settled on the tip of my tongue.

           I didn’t have the courage to speak them.

           Not yet anyway.

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 23

Chapter 23

           “If it bothers you, we don’t have to,” Roman said as flopped down on the sofa beside me. Dean had his head in my lap as I stroked my fingers through his gingery hair. His blue eyes were closed, and there was something sweetly content in his smile. I felt my heart swell with happiness as I watched him in his almost sleep.

           My heart got even bigger when I looked at Roman, who was watching me with his dark eyes full of concern. He reached out and brushed my hair behind my ear, his thumb lingering against the skin just behind it.

           “Seriously, la’u Fetu e Tasi,” Roman continued, dipping his head to look me in the eyes. “If you don’t want to go public with this yet… we understand.”

           He smiled at me in that beautiful way of his. I felt heat slip under my skin at the sound of his voice and the lilting of his new Samoan nickname for me. My one and only star. It was beautiful and sweet, and I wasn’t sure whether I liked that or baby girl more.

           Dean cracked open his eyes and reached his hand up to tap his fingers against my chin. “We can change into our pajamas, order a pizza, and watch something on Netflix.”

           I looked between them. They wore equal expressions of understanding and love. I knew they would do whatever I asked them. Even if it meant hiding the new developments in our relationships a little bit longer.

           It wasn’t a secret that I was dating Roman. It seemed like my entire dorm knew, and so did the entire team and the Pirate Poms. But some of them—like Drew and Sonya—knew that I’d also been on a date with Dean. I’m sure that Drew at least had put two and two together and came up with three.

           “It isn’t that… I’m not ashamed of you… of us…” I said quietly. “Please don’t think that.”

           Dean sat up and turned his body until I was caught between him and Roman. They each took one of my hands and squeezed my fingers. After a moment, Dean brushed my hair behind my ear and settled his forehead against my shoulder.

           “We know that, princess. But we also know that we’re not the ones who are going to be getting the raw end of the deal from everybody else.” His voice was soft against my ear, and I turned to press a kiss against his hair.

           Roman slipped his free arm around my back, his thumb rubbing slow circles between my shoulder blades. It relaxed the tension that had collected in my chest. “Hey, go raid Dean’s clothes. I’ll order something to eat. Then we’ll figure out something to watch.”

           I looked between the two of them, feeling something warm burn through my body. Dean grinned sideways at me, showing off the dimples that always made my heart race. Roman slipped his hand into my hair, stroking his thumb down the back of my neck.

           “I love you,” I said softly. “I love you both so much.”

           “Love you, too, baby girl,” Roman replied, kissing my forehead. “Now go on and get changed.”

           I squeezed their hands as I stood up. Roman brushed his hand along my hip, the silky fabric of my top slipping against his fingers. I stepped over Dean’s legs and let out a yelp when he smacked me on the ass. He was grinning beautifully when I looked over my shoulder.

           Dean’s room was as messy as always—stacks of car magazines and the paraphernalia of an MMA fighter—but there was something different about it lately. The first time I’d been in this room, I’d been floundering under the confusing attraction I had to him. Now, weeks later, it felt like… home.

           I snatched a pair of his boxers and a t-shirt from the pile of fresh laundry on his bed. Even though I’d been nervous about it, I’d gotten dressed up—hair and makeup—at the mention of a date. I pulled the pins and the tie from my hair, letting it spill down over my shoulders. The blue underneath had faded since I’d arrived at Grand Mountain, leaving only the tint at the ends of the light brown strands.

           I’m getting a haircut this weekend, I thought as I slipped back into the open space that served as living room and dining space. Roman leaned against the counter that separated the kitchen from the living room, his phone in his hand. He’d somehow changed into sweatpants and a tank top that showed off the dark tattoos that snaked from his right pectoral all the way over his shoulder and down to his wrist. I remembered the first time I’d seen them, run my fingers over the inked designs.

           He glanced up at me absently. “You want pizza or Chinese or…” His voice trailed off as he took a good look at me. “Dean…”

           “What, Uce?” he said from his place stretched out on the sofa. He had the Playstation on, searching through the movie offerings on Netflix.

           I grinned at Roman and swept around the end of the couch. “I’m okay with whatever, Ro.”

           “Let’s get pizza then.” Denim blue eyes finally settled on me, standing near his feet. He sat up, a slow smile spreading over his face. “God damn, you look good in my clothes.”

           Strong, tanned arms wrapped around my middle, drawing me back against a solid chest. “When does she not look good?” He kissed the side of my neck playfully.

           “Point,” Dean said, grinning up at us. “Now stop manhandling Addy and order us some food. I’m starving.”

           I grinned and pushed Dean’s legs out of the way as I sat down. He did a quick 180 and put his head in my lap. I leaned down and kissed his forehead before looking up at Roman. “What are you waiting for? Go order us some pizza!”

           He laughed and winked before going back to grab his phone.

***

           Dean picked It. I loved scary movies, and I really loved Steven King movies. Butterflies took off in my belly when I realized he’d picked it on purpose. They took up places on either side of me, an extra-large pepperoni pizza open on the coffee table.  As much as I loved scary movies, there were always those times when I jumped and screamed. The first time was near the very beginning—when Georgie got his arm bitten off. Dean put his arm around me, squeezing me close.

           By the end, I was caught up by both of them, stretched over their laps. I squealed near the end and Roman put his hands over my eyes.

           The movie had just ended when the front door opened. Seth slipped inside, shaking snow off his black hoodie. He took a quick inventory of the three of us on the sofa and huffed. “I’m going, I’m going!”

           Dean chuckled. “Come get some pizza, Rollins. We’re going for the double feature.” He looked down at me and pressed a kiss to my lips. “Comedy this time. Adam Sandler anybody?”

           Seth rolled his eyes and kicked off his shoes. “If you want me to leave, just say so.”

           He passed by and smiled. For the first time, I noticed there was a slight gap between his front teeth. “What’s up, Addy?”

           “My grades and my bank account,” I replied, holding my hand up. He gave me a high five before disappearing into the hallway.

           A second later, his head reappeared around the corner. “The Hangover,” he ordered, tapping the wall.

           I threw a thumbs up over my head. “You heard the man,” I said, tapping Dean on the shoulder.

           Ten minutes later, Seth reappeared smelling of soap and shampoo. He wore a pair of dark grey sweatpants and a faded black band tee. His dark hair was damp and knotted up at the back of his head.

           “Did you bring me coffee?” I queried as he went to the fridge and grabbed a soda.

           He passed in front of the television and plopped down in the only remaining chair. He snatched up a slice of pizza and put his feet up. “It’s eleven thirty at night.”

           I felt my brows move toward my hairline. “And?”

           Roman laughed. “I swear, you’re more of a caffeine junky than he is, baby girl.”

           Seth chuckled and leaned his head back, bringing the greasy, cheesy pizza to his mouth. He spoke with his mouth half full. “Turn the movie on, dude.”

           Dean rolled his eyes and hit the remote. I snuggled down into the cushions while Roman handed me another slice. “Have I ever told you guys how much I absolutely love Bradley Cooper?”

           “Yes,” Roman laughed. “Last week when we watched The A-Team”

           “And the week before that when we watched Limitless,” Dean added.

           “And the week before that,” Seth garbled around another bite, “when we watched that one with Katniss. What’s her face?”

           “Jennifer Lawrence.”

           “That’s her,” he replied, grinning at me.

           I snatched a napkin from the table, balled it up, and threw it at him. “You’ve got grease in your beard.”

           He caught it one handed, his grin never moving. “Saving it for later.”

           “Ew,” I retorted. He laughed.  

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion-Ch. 21

Chapter 21

           Dean watched me for a long moment, his chest rising and falling as he sucked in steadying breaths. Something soft slipped into his gaze as he came closer. My heart skipped a beat as he ran a hand through his mussed hair and smiled. Dimples popped in his cheeks.

           “Are you sure about that?” he asked, his voice low and almost dangerous.

           I licked my lips and nodded, feeling braver than I ever had before. My pulse pounded in my ears as Dean stepped into my personal space. I felt the heat radiating from his body. The scent of his skin and cologne and soap burned itself into my memory. My hands went up, fingers settling on his wrists to tug him down toward me.

           “Dean…” His name dripped from my lips in a warm, deep syllable.

           Seriousness bled onto his face as he rested his forehead against mine. “Don’t… don’t say my name like that, princess.”

           I brushed my fingertips against his cheek then around the back of his neck. My nose bumped into his as I toyed with his hair. “Why not?”

           He sighed, one hand slipping into my hair and cradling my skull in his palm. “Because it makes me want to do wicked things to you.”

           Heat raced through my veins. I watched as his blue eyes darkened, his pupils going wide. He looked down at me with a faint smile on his lips. I tipped my chin upward, my mouth brushing lightly against his.

           Dean let out a sound that sounded like something between a groan and a whimper. His fingers flexed against my scalp as he pushed forward, his tongue sweeping the seam of my lips. My hands locked together around the back of his neck as he deepened the kiss. It was like he stole the breath straight from my lungs. Everything went fuzzy around the edges. I felt lightheaded and tingly all over.

           I felt him smile as he ended the kiss, panting against my cheek. I swallowed hard, trying to find my wits again. Dean walked his fingertips along the nape of my neck, dipped beneath the fabric of my shirt, and stroked the hollow of my throat where my collarbones met. My pulse pounded in my ears as I locked my eyes with his and tugged my shirt over my head.

           Goosebumps rose along my flesh—partly from a chill in the air, but mostly because of the way Dean looked at me like he would devour me. I felt the touch of his gaze as it slid along the slope of my shoulders, down my arms, over my stomach and back up to the curves of my breasts. His jaw was clenched tight, nostrils flared as he breathed.

           “Stand up,” he said, his voice deeper and darker than before. Something had shifted in his face; the softness had been replaced by an aura of… control. I shivered as I got to my feet.

           He reached out and ghosted his fingertips along the length of my arm. He circled them around my wrist and drew me forward, pressing my palm against his chest just over his heart. When he looked at me again, I felt every cell in my body ignite with desire.

           “Do you trust me, Addy?” he asked, his hand keeping mine pressed firmly against his flesh. I could count his heartbeats beneath my fingers.

           I didn’t have to think. My nod was immediate. “Yes.”

           He smiled, something altogether wicked and sensual. Dean took a step toward me, his free hand sliding up my back, snapping the clasp of my bra open as he went, then twisting in my hair, wrapping it around his fist. His nose bumped against mine as he looked me in the eye.

           “I’m taking more than twenty-nine minutes tonight, princess,” he purred. “If you ever want me to stop, all you gotta do is say so.”

           I nodded, drunk on the heat and scent of his skin. His eyes darkened. “You’re gonna have to use your words.”

           My breath caught in my chest. I licked my lips and nipped at the bottom one. “I understand.”

           Dean smiled again, and this one was softer and sweeter. He tugged gently on my hair, making me tip my head up toward his. When he kissed me, it was like the first time. His mouth fit against mine perfectly. The softness of his lips was a heady contrast to the rising desperation of his kiss. I whimpered and slipped my free hand around the back of his neck, tugging him tighter against me. He reached back and snatched my wrist, pulling my hand down and twisting my arm around my back.

           “Hands to yourself, princess,” he said, stepping back away from me. The corner of his lips tipped upward in a smirk. “Now… get rid of those clothes.”

           I hesitated, gasping for breath as I looked up into his desperately beautiful face. His smirk faded. “Don’t make me wait,” he growled, his hands going to his belt. My fear must have shown on my face because he reached out to settle his palm against my cheek. “I will never ever hurt you, princess. Never.”

           “I know,” I replied, my voice small. Even I couldn’t ignore the fear that still lingered. Dean brushed his thumb against my cheekbone. I tilted my head into his touch, closing my eyes and nuzzling against his palm. “I know.”

           He leaned in and kissed me again, this time tenderly and slowly. The fear ebbed away slowly as he tugged my bra down my arms. Warmth and desire burned into my blood as his fingers swept down my torso, popping the button on my jeans free.

           “Trust me,” he whispered as he pushed my jeans down over my hips. They fell to the floor and I kicked them away. His hands planted on my hips and pulled me tight against him. I whimpered when his skin pressed hot against mine. “Trust me.”

           “I do.”

           Dean smiled and settled his mouth against the side of my throat. He left a path of warm, gentle kisses along the slope of my neck, across my shoulders. He nuzzled and nipped at the flesh of my breasts. My fingers clenched at my sides as he took first one nipple and then the other in his mouth, rolling his tongue around each one, suckling until I was panting, scraping them gently with his teeth. He moved further, gently biting the skin around my navel. I shuddered as he licked a line along the band of my underwear.

           I felt my nails dig into my palms. I was so desperate to touch him, to drag my fingers through his hair, to touch him. He chuckled darkly as he pressed his nose against my mound, nuzzling against me until I whimpered, my hips writhing on their own.

           He grinned, hooked his fingers in the band of my underwear and swept them down my legs. Heat burned at the base of my spine when I saw him tuck them into his pocket. “Back against the wall, princess.”

           I trembled as I took a few steps backward and shivered when my back hit the cold wall. Dean cradled my neck in his hands, his thumbs settled in the soft place beneath my chin. He tilted my head up and brought his lips down. The kiss was demanding and commanding, making my knees go weak.

           A moment later, Dean was kneeling in front of me. He nudged my legs apart, wrapping one arm around my thigh. My palms flattened against the wall as he leaned forward and swept his tongue along the length of my core. I whimpered. He adjusted his position, propping my foot on his shoulder, and probed his tongue between my folds.

           “Dean,” I breathed, nails scratching against the wall as he curled his tongue against my clit and sucked it into his mouth. My back arched, pressing my hips down against his mouth.

           He growled at the sound of his name, and the vibrations ran through me. My heart was pounding in my ears, I could hardly catch my breath, and it felt like fire was pulsing through my veins. It was almost too much… in the most wonderful way.

           I smacked the wall hard when Dean slipped first one then two fingers inside me. He pumped them into me, curling them against an amazing spot that made fireworks pop behind my eyelids. He matched the pace of his fingers with the flicking and swirling of his tongue along my clit… hard and fast and unrelentingly commanding.

           The ache started low in my stomach, tensing and coiling deep inside me. My legs trembled. My nails curled against the wall almost painfully. I was desperate for relief, and I begged him for it.

           “Please,” I whined, my hips bucking against him, my hands curling into fists. “Please… please… please…”

           Dean doubled his efforts and I slammed my hand over my mouth to keep from screaming. My orgasm snapped through me, my muscles tightening until I couldn’t stand it any longer. Just as quickly, they throbbed with release and I nearly collapsed with it.

           I panted, my legs trembling, my heart racing. Dean sat back on his heels, and I could feel his eyes on me. My eyes opened, and I whimpered at the sight of Dean sucking the taste of me from his fingers. He smirked at me for a moment, then let it soften into a sweet smile.

           “Let go, princess,” he soothed, settling my foot back on the ground. “I’ve got you.”

           My legs gave way and I sank against him. He gathered me up in his arms, his nose nuzzling against my hair. I sighed against his chest and smiled. “Can I touch you now?”

           He smiled, leaving little kisses over my forehead as he nodded. I wrapped my arms around his neck. He lifted me up and, after a moment of weightlessness, sank onto his bed. He cradled me in his lap and stroked his fingers through my hair. My fingers stroked the line of his throat and the scruff along his jaw.

           “That was…”

           “… thirty-seven,” Dean said smugly.

Tag List

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[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion-Ch. 18

Chapter 18

           Sonya pulled a jacket out of her closet and held it out to me. “What about this?”

           I stepped out of the bathroom we shared with our suite mates; my hair still wrapped around the curling wand. The jacket was made of short, black leather with a silver buckled belt on the waist. “You don’t think it’s too much?”

           She draped it over the side of my bed. “Nah,” she replied looking over the rest of my outfit. “I’ve got some really nice boots that might look good, too.”

           “Sonya, I’m not…” I caught myself before I said something I would regret. “Are you sure I’m not trying to do too much?”

           “Addy, sweetheart,” she said, taking the curling wand from my hand. She swatted me out of the way as she took over my hair. “I’ve known Dean Ambrose practically as long as I’ve known Roman. Trust me.”

           While she finished curling and styling my hair, I put the finishing touches on my makeup. Things had been easy and natural with Roman. With Dean… I didn’t know how it was going to go. It felt like I was putting way too much effort into it.

           Twenty minutes later, I was standing in front of the mirror in a pair of strategically shredded straight legged jeans, a burgundy tank top, Sonya’s jacket and a pair of white wedged sneakers. My hair was curled and twisted into a high ponytail. My makeup was just dramatic enough o set off my eyes and cheekbones, but not so much that it made me look different.

           “I feel so weird,” I huffed to Sonya one last time. She stuffed my phone, my keys, my ID, and some cash into a wristlet purse and tucked it into my hand.

           She waved me into silence. “You look hot. And Dean is gonna die when he sees you.”

***

           I paced the lounge in the dorm, clutching Sonya’s loaned purse in my fingers. Dean was supposed to pick me up at eight and the clock was ticking fast toward it. I leaned against the wall near where Drew was sitting with Nya Jax, one of the girls who lived on the third floor. He let out a low whistle when he saw me.

           “Roman’s going to have fits,” the Scotsman said when he looked me up and down. “You look good, Addy.”

           “Thanks, Drew, but… um…” I tucked my hair behind my ears nervously. “I’m…”

           Nya chuckled and jerked her head toward the door. “I don’t think she’s dressed like that for Roman.”

           I looked up and caught sight of Dean waiting in the quad. He was in a pair of well-tailored jeans, a fitted black Henley, and a thick, warm looking leather jacket. There was a grey beanie tugged over his auburn hair. There was a grin on his face as I waved goodnight to Drew and Nya.

           The wind bit into me as I hurried out the door toward him. His grin got bigger as he crossed toward me with determination in his step. The moment I was within reach, he pulled me against his chest and slipped his fingers around the back of my neck, tilting my head to his liking as he kissed me as if was a perfectly normal thing to do.

           “Hey there, princess,” he said, his voice deep and gruff. Dean stroked his thumb against my jaw. His denim blue eyes searched my face. “Come on, let’s get you somewhere warm.”

           Dean tucked me against his side and walked quickly toward the parking lot beside Felton Hall. He walked straight to a matte grey Chevy and opened the door. I didn’t know anything about cars, but I could tell that it was old and in pretty good condition. Dean smiled nervously as I slid inside, careful not to touch anything.

           He slid into the driver’s side and started the engine. It roared to life as he pulled out of the lot. He drove slowly down the street that circled the outside of the campus, his fingers twitching on the gearshift as if he couldn’t wait to open it up.

           A moment later, he pulled out onto the main street. The engine growled as he hit the gas, tearing off town the mountain road toward town. We drove in silence for a while. I looked down at my clutched hands, thinking that maybe this whole thing was a bad idea. They were wrong about this. It wasn’t what they thought it was.

           Dean pulled his beanie off and ran his hand through his fluffed hair. I watched him from the corner of my eye, wondering what he was thinking. “You look nice tonight,” I said quietly, not sure if he cared.

           His lips tipped upward in a lopsided smile. In the dim light, I could see a faint blush run over his cheeks. “You’re beautiful,” he replied. “All the time.”

           I caught my bottom lip between my teeth and looked away, suddenly shy under his attention. He reached over and took my hand, his fingers warm and calloused against mine. Time ticked by slowly and bought with it a sense of calm and ease.

           “What kind of car is this?” I asked after a while. The sound of the engine purred against my eardrums, soothing me almost into a sleep-like stupor. I snuggled down into the leather seat and turned my head toward him.

           He flexed his hand on the steering wheel. “Camaro. 1967.” The words came out matter of fact, as if that was the end of the conversation.

           I sighed and looked out the windshield. “Where are we going?”

           Dean’s body visibly relaxed. “There’s a pub downtown. Thought you might like something different than a traditional jock style date.”

           I grinned as I turned toward him. “So you think Ro does jock dates?”

           He grinned broadly in response. “Let me guess… burgers on the tailgate at the lookout?” I nodded reluctantly. “Movies and the steakhouse? And… the pizza joint?”

           “Two for three, Ambrose,” I said, shaking my head sadly. “We’ve never been to the steakhouse.”

           “Ro’s slacking, then. That’s clear first date material for a jock.” His words were harsh, but teasing. I’d known him long enough to know that Roman was his best friend. Teasing and ragging on each other was their love language.

           I felt my mouth curve into a smirk. “And what kind are you?”

           We pulled up to a stoplight and he turned fully toward me. His eyes were a dark blue that bordered on gunmetal when he grinned. “The one your momma warned you about.”

           “Then why am I on a date with you?”

           He revved the engine, pulling out the moment the light turned green. “Because you’re the kinda girl who doesn’t listen to her momma.”

***

           The pub was a dimly lit hole in the wall sort of place that you would find somewhere in Europe. A long, well-polished bar stretched down one side, mismatched stools lining up along it. The other side of the room had a row of booths separated by antique looking stained glass dividers. A dart board hung on the back wall in the center of a green foam block to protect the wall from stray throws. There was a pool table in the center of the room beneath an old-fashioned style ceiling lamp. Dean led the way to one of the booths near the back, his hand tight on mine as we went.

           He stood aside and let me slide onto the bench. Then, instead of taking the seat on the opposite side of the table, he plopped into place next to me. I was clearly and desperately aware of how warm he was, how the stubble on his cheek was a mix of auburn and brown and blond, and how his cologne smelled like something spicy and sharp. He tucked an arm around my shoulders and pulled me into his side.

           “So… what’s your poison, princess?” he queried, pulling a menu in front of him. He flipped straight to the drink list. “They don’t have many of those fruity cocktail things here.”

           I let my eyes walk down the list. Alcohol had never really been my thing. My parents never really had a ban against it, and I’m sure they wouldn’t have gotten upset if I had gotten smashed at home, but I’d never had more than a mixed drink before. A margarita at best. A daiquiri or two.

           I tried to convince myself to try something. It seemed like the thing to do. Dean had brought me here for a reason. I’d known almost as long as I’d known him that Dean was one of those guys who drank every now and then. And it shouldn’t have surprised me that he’d get a drink on our date. But I couldn’t quite bring myself to order anything—truth be told, I wasn’t much inclined to it.

           A waitress stopped at our table. She looked vaguely familiar with long blonde hair died pink at the ends. I tried desperately to figure out where I knew her from. “Can I get y’all something to drink?”

           Dean looked at me first. I licked my lips and took a breath. “Coke… or Pepsi. Whichever you have.”

           He raised a brow and smirked. “You want anything in that?”

           I looked him in his teasing blue eyes, feeling the knot of nervousness release in my chest. “Ice. And a cherry.”

           The laugh that dropped out of him made me feel bright on the inside. His eyes crinkled as his smirk turned into a grin and then a smile. “I’ll have the same,” he said, not looking away from me. “But put some Jack in mine.”

           The waitress nodded her understanding and bobbed off to the bar. Dean nudged me gently with his forehead. “You’re one of those straight edge types, aren’t you? Like Seth.” My expression must have let him know I wasn’t familiar with the categorization. “You know, no alcohol, no drugs, that sort of thing.”

           I nodded in understanding. “Well, definitely on the no drugs side. But I’m not against alcohol. I just don’t drink it much. And definitely not on a first date, Dean Ambrose.”

***

           Dean grinned easily. It was something that I’d noticed about him early on. And when he smiled—actually smiled—it was breathtaking. He was easy to be around. But he was intense in a way that made me think thoughts that made my heart race.

           “Like this, look,” he said as we stood six or seven feet from the dart board. Dean stood behind me, holding a bundle of darts in one fist and settling the fingers of his other hand on my wrist. He pulled my hand up in near alignment with my eye line. “You’ve got to line it up. And don’t let go so late. They’re gonna make me pay for the gouges in the floor.”

           He’d convinced me to play darts and, when he’d quickly realized I had no idea what to do, had resolved to teach me. We’d been at it for half an hour, but I was no closer to hitting the bullseye than I had been at the beginning. But he seemed to like teaching. Or maybe he liked the fact that he was pressed up against me, his chest slotting firmly against my back.

           “I’m done,” I said breathily, slapping my free hand on his forearm. “I’m tapping out. If you’re so good at it, then you do it.”

           He smirked in a devilish sort of way. “What’s in it for me?”

           “What do you want?” The words were out before I could stop myself. The twinkle in his eyes was a clear indication that I’d made a very bad decision.

           Dean leaned close to my ear and dropped a teasing, lingering kiss on the side of my throat. “Five minutes of making out for every bullseye.”

           I watched him carefully for a moment, deciding whether I was willing to take that bet. He’d thrown a few shots earlier and had hit the target, but nowhere near the center. His last drink had been over an hour ago, so I couldn’t count on alcohol messing with his aim. And honestly, as much as I tried to convince myself that I was taking the bet because I was sure he’d lose it… I desperately wanted him to win it.

           “Done.”

           His brows lifted toward his hairline, clearly surprised that I’d taken the bait. “All right then.”

           He wriggled his shoulders, warming up exactly as I’d seen him do in the cage. He took a deep breath and let it out then, one by one, threw the darts in his fist.

           And one by one… two, three, four, five, six… they lodged in the bullseye. The first two shots fell out when the third landed, to which he was quick to shout, “Those still count!”

Tag List

@mox-made-me-do-it​ @vebner37​

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion-Ch. 17

Chapter 17

           I didn’t go back to the bleachers. Instead, I went straight to the bathroom and stayed there until I could get my racing heart under control. My thoughts were so jumbled that I couldn’t make sense of them. I’d been so terrified when I’d watched Dean fighting, and I was relieved beyond measure that he was okay at the end of it.

           But I couldn’t explain the way that Dean had looked at me and the way that it made my heart skip all the way to my toes. I stood at the sink, splashing cold water on my face, trying to clear my head. I couldn’t understand the way I suddenly couldn’t imagine the thought of not seeing Dean Ambrose again or how seeing him smile at me, even covered in blood and bruises, made me desperately happy.

           This can’t be happening, I cursed, staring at myself in the mirror. Not to Ro. And not with Dean.

           I stayed in the bathroom as long as I dared. When I finally came out, Roman was leaning against the wall, arms crossed over his chest.

           “Ro… I…” The words got stuck in my throat. I thought I was going to choke on them. Especially when Roman was looking at me with such openness in his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

           He gathered me up in his arms, enveloping me in the strength of them. He rested his cheek against the top of my head as he breathed in the scent of me. “It’s okay, Addy,” he murmured against my hair. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”

           Before I could speak again, he drew away and held me by the shoulders. Roman smiled and lifted one hand to wipe the tears from my cheeks. “Come with me.”

           He took me by the hand and led the way down a hallway that emptied out into what looked like a locker room. Roman looked around for a moment before finding what he was looking for. It didn’t take me long to realize he was looking for Dean.

           “Roman,” I whimpered, afraid of seeing Dean again with him so close. I knew that he’d seen what happened at the cage. That he could see the truth of it in my eyes.

           “Addy,” he said, stooping so that he could look me in the eye. He brushed his fingers against my cheek. “I know that you’ve got to be feeling confused. And I’m telling you… it’s okay.”

           The words slammed into me, shocking the breath out of my lungs. “It isn’t… it’s… it’s wrong…” I gripped the front of his shirt, feeling frantic. “I want you… I want to be with you…”

           He cupped my face in his palms, making me look up at him. “Baby girl, I know.” He dipped his head and kissed me softly. As if it was enough to calm the fears now burning in my heart. “Trust me with this, okay?”

           I nodded and let him pull me over to where Dean stood, leaning back against a wall of lockers and watching. Roman squeezed my fingers as we got closer.

           Dean smiled at Roman over my head, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes. And it faded entirely when he looked at me. “Hey, princess,” he said quietly. “Did you enjoy the fight?”

           “No!” I yelped, my gaze raking over his face, taking stock once again of the bumps and bruises. Before I could stop myself, I reached for him, my fingertips ghosting over the bruise on his jaw and his busted lip. My throat constricted, the tears starting again. “How could I enjoy watching you get hurt? Dean…”

           Even though my vision was blurry, I saw the way his blue eyes brightened just a little. “It’s nothing. I’ve had worse.”

           “Don’t say that, please.” I couldn’t stop crying. I looked back and forth between Dean and Roman, confused and feeling my heart break in my chest. “Ro, why are you doing this to me? It’s cruel.”

           “Because I asked him to,” Dean said quietly.

           I turned back to him, feeling my heart sink into my chest. “Why? Why the hell would you be so vindictive? I thought we were friends.”

           “I don’t want to be your friend, Addy.”

           The words cut to the bone. They stabbed straight into my heart and sliced it to ribbons. For a moment, I couldn’t breathe. In the next, anger boiled through my veins. I balled up my fist and pounded on his chest, no longer caring that it might hurt him. My heart was breaking, and I couldn’t understand why.

           Dean stood there, not flinching as I hit him as hard as I could. Instead, he put his arms around me and lifted me off my feet. A moment later, he kissed me. I could taste blood and sweat on his lips. That was all it took to bring me back to my senses. I shoved against his chest.

           When I was finally put back on my feet, I backed away, holding my fingers to my mouth in surprise. I looked back at Roman, only to find him watching the whole thing with a calm expression. I couldn’t understand it. Why did he just stand there? Why didn’t he say something? Why didn’t he look angry?

           “What’s wrong with you?” I hissed at Roman. “Why are you acting like… this… this is normal? I’m supposed to be your girlfriend and your best friend kissed me right in front of you!”

           Roman closed the space between us with slow, deliberate movements. “How do you feel about Dean?”

           “Excuse me?” Dizziness swept over me. I swayed on my feet, plopping down on a nearby bench.

           He crouched in front of me, his fingers coming to rest on my knee. His dark eyes were open and honest. There wasn’t anything malicious or afraid in his gaze as he looked at me. “I saw you today, Addy. I saw how terrified you were when Dean was in that fight. You begged me to get him out of there. Why did you do that?”

           “Because it’s Dean! I can’t… I don’t want…” I gasped a breath and nearly choked on realization. “I can’t stand the thought of him getting hurt.”

           “Why?” Dean asked softly, drawing my attention from Roman. “Why does it bother you?”

           My palm brushed against his cheek, trying not to press against the bruise. “I don’t know. Because it’s you… because I’m afraid that something will happen, that I’ll never see you again, or that you won’t call me princess anymore. I…” I cursed inwardly as I started crying again.

           Roman cradled the back of my head in his palm, thumb stroking my hair. “Because you love him, too.”

           I wanted to argue and tell him he was wrong. If there was anyone that I loved, it was him. He was the one I wanted. But I couldn’t. No matter how much I wanted to fight, I couldn’t. Because it was true.

           My heart sank into my stomach as I looked at Roman. “I’m sorry, Ro. I’m so sorry.”

           Whatever I expected, it wasn’t for him to smile and kiss me gently. It wasn’t for him to look me in the eye and say, “Don’t be. He’s easy to love.” The smile faded just a little. “If you need some time… to figure things out…”

           “Or… option number two,” Dean said smoothly. “You don’t have to pick.”

           Roman reached out and smacked him hard in the midsection. “I wasn’t going to lead with that.”

           “Look, princess,” Dean said, kneeling in front of me, “I don’t want to be your friend. I want from you what you and Ro have.”

           I looked between the two of them, not quiet comprehending what was happening. “You’re okay with this?”

           “If it’s what you want, I’m willing to give it a try,” Roman replied. “And I don’t care what people say about us. As long as you two are honest with me… as long as you’re happy…”

           “Are you going to be happy?” Dean asked.

           Roman’s smile was bright and genuine as he looked between the two of us. “Yeah. And if I’m not, we’ll talk about it.”

***

           I walked into the dorm in a daze, not sure what just happened. Sonya sat on her bed, her ever-present box of donuts on the mattress beside her. She grinned at me and held out the box. “Good break, Addy?”

           I plopped down in the chair at her bedside. “I don’t know how to explain it, Sonya.”

           “Oh, that sounds interesting.” She sat up straighter, dangling her feet over the edge of the bed. “Tell me everything.”

           Everything? Even I didn’t know everything.

           “I think I’m dating Roman and his roommate, Dean.”

Tag List

@mox-made-me-do-it​ @vebner37​

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Welcome to Oblivion--Ch. 12

Chapter 12

           Grand Mountain didn’t mess around when it came to football. The home side of the stadium was packed out with students, families, staff, and supporters from town. People had been tailgating in the parking lot for hours, and the scent of brats and burgers still wafted over the field.

           There was a section in the front, right at the 50-yard line, filled with students decked out in purple and gold. They had banners, pom poms, vibrant felt pirate hats, and plastic hooks for hands. They called it the Captain’s Quarters, where the best and loudest of the Pirates fans sat. It was mostly seniors, but there were some underclassmen there, too. I was pretty sure it was a raffle to get in and you had to sign up.

           But I didn’t need to worry about the Captain’s Quarters. No, I was tucked beneath the stands in the locker rooms in the Pirate’s Den. The football players were down the hall. It was impossible not to hear them yelling and roaring. I sat next to Peyton in the girl’s locker room with the rest of the Poms. They spent the last few minutes before the game adjusting their uniforms and making sure their hair was curled and bound with giant gold bows.

           I’d spent the last month with the team, training and practicing with them as if I was one of them. Coach Helmsley had put me through my paces early on. Only when I’d been able to go through an entire practice with the Poms and keep up did she agree to let me work as a choreographer. It wasn’t a bad deal, not really. Sure, it meant that I had to get up early and might have to travel for away games, but it also meant that I was getting work study. I actually had some money coming in.

           I could actually afford to buy food.

           “Let’s see how that choreography works out, Holloway,” Coach Helmsley said, her arms crossed over her chest. “Low key home game should be a great place to practice.”

           As she walked away, I looked over at Peyton, who was grinning. “This is low key?”

           She patted me on the thigh and stood up, tightening her pony. “Your moves are great. And you’ve trained us perfectly. It’s going to be great.”

***

           I’d missed sitting on the sidelines of a football game. I was in a folding chair against the concrete wall, settled several feet behind the Pirates bench. The team had run by me as they came out of the Den. Roman and Drew led the charge, both looking twice as big as normal with all their gear and padding. Jimmy, Jey, and Baron were deep in the throng of players.

           The last time I’d watched a football game from the sidelines, I had been on crutches with a braced knee and forced to watch my teammates perform my choreography without me.

           I’d forgotten how fantastic it was to be so close to the action. The sound of heavy bodies wrapped in protective gear was one that you never forgot. And truly, it was one of my favorite sounds in the world.

           Thirty minutes into the first half, I was out of my seat and standing just behind the bench, shouting and clapping as they set up for a difficult play. The Pirates were fourth and fifteen and already down by a touchdown and two-point conversion. They’d been pushing hard toward their opponent’s endzone, but the Cougars had a good defensive line.

           Drew was the first-string quarterback, and he’d been shouting plays at his teammates during the huddle. I could hear his angry Scottish tone from where I stood. I bounced up and down on my toes, clapping hard, cupping my hands around my mouth and shouting, “Come on, boys!”

           The play slammed to a halt when Jey, the left side running back, got tackled six yards from the fourth down. Cursing and yanking his helmet off, Drew led the offense back to the bench. Roman, the lead defensive tackle, grabbed his helmet and started toward the field. As he passed by Drew, he smacked his friend hard in the chest and shrugged. Well, as much as someone can shrug wearing football pads.

           Roman was a beautiful thing on the field. He was brutal and quick.

           The offense was back on the field in ten minutes, Roman and his line having shut down the Cougars’ push.

***

           Peyton and the Poms took the field for halftime, and I was a nervous wreck. I was terrified that it would fall flat—not because they weren’t amazing athletes, but because my choreography just wasn’t good enough. My hands were caught in a nervous knot as I watched them from the sidelines. Coach Helmsley stood a few feet away, her arms crossed over her chest, frowning as she watched the performance on the field.

           It was my make or break moment. If this didn’t work, I’d be off my work study and back to square one.

           When the performance was over, the Captain’s Quarters erupted with cheers and applause. The Pirates, having just come back out of the Den, whistled and called playfully as the Poms jogged off the field, bouncing their pompoms in the air and smiling. Peyton rushed over to me as soon as she could break the line, grinning from ear to ear.

           Her Australian accent was thick as she hugged me tightly and squealed, “It was so good, Addy! Seriously! It was amazing!”

           She squeezed me one more time before disappearing down the tunnel to the locker room.

           “She’s right, baby girl,” rumbled Roman’s voice nearby. I glanced over, feeling heat rush into my face, and saw him grinning lopsidedly from the bench. His hair was tied up in a knot, and sweat streaked down his neck. “You did a great job.”

           He stood up, looking taller than ever, bulky in his pads and gear. A few steps later, he was right there, towering in front of me, one arm slithering around my back to tug me in. The plastic of his protective gear dug into my flesh, and I could smell the sweat and heat coming off him. His black eyes were bright and teasing.

           Roman leaned down and, in front of God and everybody, kissed me soundly on the lips. He chuckled when he drew back, watching my face go beet red. “Let’s get some pizza after the game.”

           All I could do was nod, dumbstruck and dizzy with the realization that he’d just kissed me in front of an entire stadium of people. Sure, most of them probably hadn’t noticed. But he’d done it. He certainly couldn’t have staked his claim on me any more adamantly.

***

           We sat across from one another at the Mom and Pop pizza place in town, a basket of breadsticks in the middle of the table. He was surrounded by an overwhelming scent of clean. I didn’t know if it was body wash or deodorant or cologne, but it smelled wonderful. Sharp and sweet, with a bit of mint underneath.

           “Have fun at the game?” he asked a few moments after we sat down.

           I felt the smile as it spread slowly over my face. “Yeah. You were great. Just… you were amazing.”

           He chuckled and looked away, his cheeks turning red. Roman ran his hand over his goatee, trying to hide his smile. It was cute that I could make him blush. I wanted to do it more often.

***

           “Sorry,” Roman mumbled as he unlocked the door of his apartment. “I’ve been meaning to take this over to Drew for weeks. Just let me grab it real quick.”

           I nodded, following him in the door. He flicked on the light as he tucked his keys in his pocket. The apartment was small and sparse, though it was clearly lived in. To the right of the door was a wobbly-looking table with four mismatched chairs. Straight ahead was a kitchen, sectioned off from the rest of the room by a long, low counter. The left side of the room was taken up by a large TV on a black table, a Playstation on the shelf beneath, and a squishy looking couch and chair. A hallway went back deeper into the apartment. I could see one door from where I stood.

           Curiosity pulled me closer. I peeked around the wall and saw another three doors in the hall. One stood open, and I could see a mirror over a narrow sink. Another, the one at the far end, stood wide open, lights on. Roman appeared as he moved around, trying to find whatever he needed for Drew. He glanced up, and I tried to slip back into the living room, but he saw me.

           “Come on in, Addy,” he said, laughter in his voice. He stood at the door waving for me to join him.

           I tiptoed past both closed doors and stopped just on the threshold of Roman’s bedroom. It was roomy, the walls painted a soothing sort of blue. A queen-sized bed was shoved into one corner. A desk was tucked against the other wall with a lamp, a stack of textbooks, and a half-open laptop. Instead of a regular desk chair, he had a worn high-backed armchair.

           He stood at a battered wooden dresser, digging through the top drawer. On top was a framed photo of Roman with who I assumed were his parents and a few worn paperbacks. A pile of DVDs teetered on the ground beside it.

           “You can sit down if you want,” he said over his shoulder, still digging through one drawer after another. He muttered to himself, swearing that he’d just had whatever it was the day before.

           I slipped past him and sat gingerly on the edge of the bed. It gave beneath my weight and the scent of laundry soap and that sharp-sweet-mint that was wholly him wafted up. The urge to curl into the pillows and just breathe in the scent of him was almost more than I could manage.

           He turned around, his smile slipping a little when he saw me sitting on the edge of his bed. I was reminded again how tall and broad he was as he stepped closer. My fingers gripped the edge of the mattress, suddenly afraid to move.

           Roman brushed his fingers against my cheek, brushing my hair back behind my ear. I leaned into his touch, my eyes slipping closed. His thumb brushed along the curve of my cheek and the line of my jaw, soothingly warm with long, slow strokes. My heart jumped into my throat, and I suddenly was desperate to kiss him.

           “Addy.” He said my name like he couldn’t believe I was there. It made butterflies take off in my stomach.

           I skimmed one hand up his chest and over his shoulder, curling my fingers behind his neck. Before I could second-guess my courage, I tugged him down, meeting his mouth with my own. He let out a groan that rippled through his chest.

           The hand on my cheek slipped into my hair, fingers pressing firmly and sweetly against my skull. The other leaned into the mattress, bearing his weight as he kissed me like it would be the last time. I forgot everything except the feel of his hands and the taste of his lips.

           He broke away, forehead pressed against mine as he panted to catch his breath. I looked up at him and caught sight of his face, his eyes shut, cheeks flushed, brow furrowed as if he was concentrating very hard on something. Warmth spilled into my limbs, dragging me toward something I didn’t have the words to describe.

           “Ro,” I murmured, brushing my lips against his gently, barely. “Kiss me like that again. Please?”

           He groaned and squeezed his eyes shut tightly. His breath came in faint panting gasps. I let my nails scrape against the back of his neck as I tried to pull him closer. “Please?” I whispered again.

           Roman leaned into me, pressing me back against the mattress as he kissed me. His tongue swept across my lips, demanding entrance. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his neck as he settled over me. One arm tucked beneath me and lifted me fully up onto the bed. My sandals caught on the edge of the mattress and fell off, thumping to the floor. A moment later, two other muffled bumps followed.

           He gathered me against him. The heat that radiated from him made my head spin. I dug my fingers into his hair, working the knot loose and pulling the elastic free. His hair fell around us, tickling against my cheek.

           Something burned through my body. It was a want more than anything I’d ever known. I returned his kiss with wild abandon, wriggling until I was pressed firmly against him. He groaned and snatched at my waist until I could feel every muscle in his chest and every expansion of his ribs as he breathed.

           “Addy,” he mumbled, his mouth leaving mine and trailing down toward my ear. His beard scratched wonderfully against my throat as he kissed and nipped at the curve of my jaw. He panted against my skin, and his fingers dug into the flesh of my hip in a wonderful way.

           I ran my fingers through his hair, feeling the strands slip like silk along my skin. My body was suddenly too heavy, too warm. Every nerve ending was alive and singing with sensation.

           “Roman? Can I stay the night?”

           He pressed his forehead against my collarbone and groaned. “Please.”

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Okay so question for you : how the idea of a polyamorous story came into your mind ? (I love these kind of story) Still for you : did you plan on writing a Reader (or OC whatever you prefer) X Roman Reign ? And same with Drew McIntyre ? Question for Seth from Welcome to Oblivion : how did you fall in love with Addy ? Question for Seth from Waking up in Vegas : you twat, why did you let Mera go ????

(I’m going to break these up by doing one Seth, then author questions, and then the other Seth)

WUIV Seth: (Scrubbing his hands over his face) Look, I’m an ass. I’m the biggest ass in the entire universe. I get that. And I was a selfish ass. Mera gave up so much so that I could follow my dream of being a pro wrestler and main eventing Wrestlemania. But when I got there--the fame and all that shit just went to my head. (leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees and sighing) I’d always had Mera. That was a given. And now... all these women were just throwing themselves at me. I got antsy, I guess. I loved--love--Mera so much, but it wasn’t enough to stop me being selfish. So... yeah... I didn’t let her go so much as shoved her away. And she left. 

Q1: How did the idea of a polyamorous story come into your mind?

Me: Honestly, I’ve questioned before if I might be poly. I’m genuinely open to the idea of dating or being with more than one person at a time. And I think there aren’t enough stories that normalize poly relationships. Also, just in general, it’s really hard for me to pick my favorite Buck (but if I had to, Nick, all the way) or my favorite member of The Shield (that’s so hard... probably Ro). A poly story made it easy to not have to pick. 

Q2: Do you plan on writing a Reader/OC x Drew McIntyre or Roman Reigns story?

Me: Here’s the thing. I have so many plot bunnies running around in my head. And I’m pretty sure that there’s a request that got lost in the chaos of the last few years that was an OC/Roman story. Am I open to them, absolutely. Hell, I think I have an OC x Elias story in a file somewhere. So the real answer is I would, but they aren’t currently on the plan. Mostly because I’ve not been watching WWE that much, so I’ve kinda fallen away from them. Plus, Ro’s been out with the twins. 

WtO Seth: (looking thoroughly shocked) What? Me and Addy? Hell no. I get she’s with Ro and Dean--which was fucking weird to get used to at the beginning--but that doesn’t mean I’m into her. Not like that anyway. We’re friends. I’ve never met anyone who can put away coffee like me. She’s cool, but we’re just friends. That’s it.