#salute to 50 years of hiphop

[dippedanddripped]

To Warren G & E-40, Hip-Hop Is A Revolution Charged By Love | A GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop

[cyarskaren52]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by BET Networks (@bet)

bet Congrats are in order for OUR #RockAndRollHallOfFame inductees:

🎵 Missy Elliot — She's SUPA DUPA FLY! Salute, Missy Elliot, the first woman in hip hop to be a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee. The way Missy has impacted culture and music is undeniable.

🎧 Dj Kool Herc — Salute, 'The Father of #HipHop,' he threw the party of a lifetime and now we're celebrating 50 years of the greatest genre of music.

🎤 Chaka Khan — Alexa play, 'I'm Every Woman.' She's the 'Queen of Funk,' the 10-time GRAMMY Award-winning superstar has defined pop, soul, jazz, and funk music.

💖 Don Cornelius — ❤️, ✌🏾, and Soul. World renowned television host and producer. There would not be a @soultrain without the amazing Don Cornelius.

Other inductees include Willie Nelson, Sheryl crow and Rage Against the Machine

[electrickkarma]

My Kpop opinions that no one asked for but like, what’s the internet without unasked opinions.

1) CLC deserves much more recognition. I still can’t believe their first win was with Black Dress.

2) Every GFriend song sounds like an anime intro and tbh they all sound almost the same for me (I’m not saying their songs are bad).

3) Twice isn’t overly cute and they slay all the time.

4) Give Mina more lines.

5) I really dislike shippings. Whether it’s between different idols or idols of the same group. Idk, I feel like most of the time is over-analysing everything and i’ve seen it get borderline unhealthy. But if you enjoy it, you do you sis.

6) Wendy is the most talented member in Red Velvet (they’re all talented but at least for me, Wendy stands out).

7) Namjoon is underrated af.

8) SNSD are the queens of KPop and will always be.

9) I’m sick of armys and exo-l’s being rivals. If BTS and EXO can get along and be respectful, why can’t we?

10) Shine by Pentagon is one of the best songs of the year.

11) The unit was better than both editions of Produce 101.

12) But the groups that came from The Unit are average next to IOI and Wanna One.

13) I love Jackson with all my heart but his solo songs were kinda disappointing.

14) IU is the best soloist in Kpop.

15) I personally think that neither BTS, EXO or Big Bang are the kings of Kpop. For me Super Junior takes that title. They changed the industry and they are still together releasing bops. Legends.

16) Blackpink’s comeback was kinda disappointing. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not bad at all! Dududududududu (idk) and Really are bops but i was expecting another sound.

17) BTS deserves all the success they have and they aren’t overrated at all. They’re the most influential Kpop group in the world and even if you don’t like them, it’s easy to agree on that.

18) I can’t fully stan EXO and it’s kinda because so many of their songs aren’t written by them. I know that there are a lot of groups that I stan that have their songs not written by them but I think they have so much potential to do something huge and that kinda najasbdhwnzkehd me (but tbh, SM is the one at fault there).

19) I hated NCT 2018’s song (but they were HILARIOUS in variety shows). Still, NCT 127, U and Dream are fire.

20) In every group, there is this one member that i can picture quitting or like, they don’t continue their contract. Even if it never happens, i know (or at least i feel it) who would be.

21) As sad as Jonghyun’s death was (I miss you and I love you😭), I think it was in some sort if way a good thing (DON’T COME FOR ME) in a way that it’s a turning point in how companies should put more interest in idols mental health. Like, I wish it didn’t happen and i cried so much but it helped to set that point straight (to like, management).

22) Mamamoo has the best “salute” ever.

23) YG’s idols rules are the most stupid things ever. That driving license thing sucks ass.

24) Seungri from Big Bang is one of the smartest idols out there. He has an empire of clubs, restaurants, even academies. He has a raw talent in business.

25) Henry needs more attention. He’s a musical genius, he can act, he’s funny so he does really well in variety and he’s so handsome. SM lost a really talented guy and i hope he gets all the recognition he deserves.

26) I sadly think SNSD is over. I love them so much but I think that with Tiffany, Seohyun and Sooyoung out (and Jessica ofc but that was years ago), the group will never be the same.

27) I have mixed feelings about Wanna One. I want them to stay together forever but at the same time some of them are in groups that i stan really hard and I want them to go back to their og band.

28) Red by Hyuna makes me angry. Idk why, I just hate that song. It doesn’t make sense to me.

29) Jessi is a freaking queen that breaks all the korean standards and i love her.

30) BTOB has the best vocalists, there is no doubt about it.

31) The BTS fandom isn’t as toxic as it seems. Of course there are some toxic fans but the non toxic ones are more than the toxics and we all get along (international and korean armys) and it’s pretty nice to be a part of this fandom.

32) I’m sick of people bashing Momoland and saying like they’re not talented and saying that without Bboom Bboom they wouldn’t be famous, and i’m like, every group has a song that made them really famous. Shut up, they’re talented, cute and aren’t hurting anyone so get over it.

33) D.O scares me so much. I think he’s a great vocalist and an amazing actor, but he scares me ahahaha. Maybe it’s because he’s kinda quiet (from what I’ve seen at least, I might be wrong since i haven’t seen a lot of videos of EXO), maybe his glare... I don’t know.

34) Leave Taehyung’s mullet alone. He looks amazing.

35) I hate when people stan only a few members of a group. I’ve seen cases where people are like, I love this group but i hate this or this member. YOU DON’T LOVE THE GROUP IF YOU HATE SOME MEMBERS. Get tf out of here.

36) Red Velvet is one of the most (if not the most) versatile groups ever. They fit every concept and they slay in all of them.

37) Don’t call Black Pink the queens of Kpop. They have like 8 songs. They’re still kinda rookies. Stop. They are so talented but it’s too much to call them the queens of Kpop. They have a long way to go.

38) Give F(X) a comeback.

39) Replay by Shinee is one of the best songs ever and the live version brings tears to my eyes.

40) ROCK N HIPHOP is BTOB’s best song. Go listen to it. You’re welcome.

41) If NU’EST doesn’t get enough attention when their comeback as a whole group happens, I’ll be so disappointed at life.

42) The Eve by EXO has the sexiest dance ever.

43) ONF is such a good group, keep an eye on them because their music is so good.

44) People should stop over sexualising (if not just sexualising as a whole) idols bodies.

45) People should stop sleeping on Monsta X.

46) A collab between BTS and EXO is something that I need and i’m sure it would break the internet.

47) The latest Winner comeback was disappointing. Their other songs are so good and i was expecting so much for that comeback but tbh? I almost hated their songs. Still love them as a group tho.

48) People that listen to kpop should stop talking all the time about kpop. It’s not everybody, but i know quite a few persons that listen to kpop and it’s the only thing they talk about. If for me, a person that listens to kpop (and western and latin music), it’s tiring, I can’t even imagine how it feels for people that don’t listen to kpop. I feel like I can’t actually get to know those persons because they only talk about that and they don’t have other things to talk about.

49) Somi should just go solo. I saw this in a video on YouTube and I agree completely. She’s really talented and her looks correspond to the korean beauty standards, so she ends up taking all the attention a lot of the times. I feel that like, in a group she would be the center of attention and a solo career would be the best for her. It reminds me a little bit of 4minute with Hyuna. She was basically 4minute in terms of recognition, the one with the most fans... they disbanded, she went solo (without counting triple h wich i adore) and she’s doing really well.

50) SM has some of the best stylists in the industry. Every single person under that label looks bomb af in every comeback, award show, mv... I want every single outfit they wear.

51) It’s crazy how happy Kpop makes you feel.

Tell me your opinions if you want! I’d love to hear them. I’m thinking about making a YouTube video out of this but i suck at editing😂.

[puertoricanflagsup]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Puerto Rican Flags Up (@puertoricanflagsup)

Happy 49th Bornday to Hip Hop and remember the NuyoRican Boricuas were right there creating it too next year will be 50 years ! Reposted from @mysonnenygeneral #Salute to my brother @icet for dropping this #SuperDope video announcing the 50th Anniversary of Hip Hop! We are only 1 year away from our Golden Anniversary family and we’ve got some major announcements coming! So #follow @50thAnniversaryOfHipHop now to stay plugged in ✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿 . . #prflagsup #puertoricanflagsup #hiphop #boricuasinhiphop #bboy #breaking #Mc https://www.instagram.com/p/ChJDHIqj7-W/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[influencegetem]

This man is amazing and will live forever.. Happy birthday General Lo❗AyAK 2👆🏿👆🏿⤴️ Reposted from @shine19xx #repost @koerodriguez ・・・ Please help me wish Fashion Connoisseur, Hip-Hop Trailblazer, Proud Puerto Rican, Creative Dynamo and one of Brooklyn's Finest, a very Happy & Blessed "BIG 50!" A lot of us 1970 babies -- myself included -- are turning half a century this year. Given all of the inner-city trappings and challenges of the 1970s & '80s, including Gangs, Poverty, Police Brutality, Reganomics, Crack Cocaine and Aids, a lot of us were happy (not to mention lucky) to reach 18. “50” is a milestone! I salute our good Brother Thirstin on his 50th rotation for turning a notorious gang into a productive, global movement; for honoring, uplifting and steering Hip-Hop, Fashion and Hispanic culture in a positive direction; and for taking your credo of "Love & Loyalty" and showing us to make those two “L’s” a way of life. Enjoy your born day to the fullest, my mellow, and may you see 50 more! Bendiciones, Koe ✊🏼 “Happy 50” Graphic: @koerodriguez x @atw_brand #polorican #thirstinhowlthe3rd #lolifes #lolifesorlando #brownsville #brooklyn #happy50 #puertorock #boricua #hiphop #hiphopculture #trailblazers #hiphopfashion #fortydeuce #photography #streetphotography #polostyle #ralphlauren #dowhatyoulove #livinglegend - #regrann https://www.instagram.com/p/B7duWMFHuyG/?igshid=z5nkyhs10314

[savetopnow]

2018-03-28 13 MUSIC now

MUSIC

Brooklyn Vegan

Jarvis Cocker's tour kicked off in Brighton, UK (pics, setlist, video)

Traveller (Robert Ellis, Cory Chisel & Jonny Fritz) prep debut LP, touring

Mike Birbiglia playing NYC shows before "The New One" tour continues

tours announced: Phoenix, Posies, Nils Frahm, H.E.R., 6LACK, Anna Burch, more

Nashville's TWEN on tour, playing NYC tonight (listen)

Consquence of Sound

Ranking: Every Steven Spielberg Movie from Worst to Best

Phoenix announce Los Angeles residency

Afropunk reveals 2018 lineups for Atlanta and Brooklyn festivals

Future shares video for new song “Absolutely Going Brazy”: Watch

The Top 10 Musical Moments on The Americans

Fact Magazine

Visual artist Jesse Draxler announces Misophonia art book on Sacred Bones

Singles Club: Lil Yachty taps Bhad Bhabie for collab, how about that?

Physical music outsold digital downloads in the US last year

FACT mix 645: μ-Ziq

Moog turns its iconic Minimoog Model D synth into a fully-featured iOS app

Fluxblog

Late Night Games

The Middle Of A Cold Premonition

The Moon Right Behind Me

Make Me Feel Right

I Loved And I Lost

Idolator

Anitta Is A Red-Hot Disco Diva In Her “Indecente” Video

Sam Smith’s New Single Is A Remix Of “Pray” Featuring Logic

Kylie Minogue Debuts “Golden,” Covers “Islands In The Stream” On Australian TV

Louisa Makes A Move For Pop Superstardom With Her Rowdy “YES” Video

Sigrid Switches It Up With Piano Ballad “I Don’t Want To Know”

Listen to This

CL Brooks - Aloe Vera [Lofi Rap] (2018)

Arawak -- Accadde a Bahia [Jazz] (1970)

WARD -- Nobody Else [Indie / Dreamy Pop] (2018)

Still Woozy - Goodie Bag (2017) - [Pop/Trippy]

MYRNE -- Another Night (featuring Nevve) [Electronic / Indie] (2018)

Popjustice

NONONO’s new one is v excellent and here’s the video

New Music Friday: all hail Let’s Eat Grandma’s miniature pop symphony

Paloma Faith’s branded content is better than your branded content

Saluting the artwork for PRETTYMUCH’s Healthy

Louisa Johnson interview: “We went, ‘oh, fuck it, let’s just get drunk’”

Reddit Music

R Kelly accused of grooming 14-year-old girl as sex 'pet'

Need help with a musical April Fools joke...

Joy Division - Atrocity Exhibition [Post-Punk]

Rainbow - Man on the Silver Mountain [Hard Rock]

Marty Robbins -- El Paso [Country/Western]

Rolling Stone

Watch Joan Baez Honor Obama in 'The President Sang Amazing Grace'

Bettye LaVette on Interpreting Bob Dylan: 'I Had to Go to Bed With These Songs'

Usher, Common, Roots to Play Memorial Concert for Lynching Victims

Erykah Badu, Miguel, Janelle Monae Top Afropunk Brooklyn Lineup

Watch Soccer Mommy Channel Nineties Teen Movies in 'Cool' Video

Slipped Disc

German churches are hit by new music tax

Boston has a new principal cello

John Neumeier will see out 50 years in Hamburg

Maestro splits: Andris Nelsons’s marriage is over

Frank Gehry gets to build again in LA

Spotify Blog

Spotify Celebrates Black History Year-Round with Launch of Black History Is Happening Now

Spotify Launches Integration with New and Existing Cadillac Models

Spotify Launches ‘Louder Together’ with First Multi-Artist Spotify Single Collaboration from Independent Stars Sasha Sloan, Nina Nesbitt and Charlotte Lawrence

Spotify Launches Self-Serve Advertising Platform in the UK and Canada

Spotify Announces Launch of Line-In

We Are the Music Makers

Me, 20 minutes after finding out Soundtoys has a sale

What do you guys think is the next style of drumming? (Jazz->R&B->Rock->Hiphop->The Future?)

Music Theory: relation between major and minor scales, and what are modes? (5 minutes quick video)

Question how how to pay for using samples in beats

I still don't like my own music

[jezfletcher]

1000 Albums, 2019: The Top Tracks

As always, I’m going to present my list of top tracks here without commentary. I find there’s less to talk about in individual tracks, and also I’ve run out of energy after writing up my top albums. But the order is well thought out here—in fact, I probably put more effort into ordering these correctly than I did my albums.

I’m really just cataloguing these here for my own purposes, and so that Sam and I can compare lists, but there’s a playlist at the bottom if you want to check these out.

Anyway, here we go: the countdown from #10 to #1 of the year:

150. Polkadot Stingray - Ichidaiji (Japanese pop rock)

149. Perry Farrell - Let’s All Pray For This World (post punk)

148. Jesse Palter - TMI (Wouldn’t You Like To Know) (soul)

147. 3 One Oh - Eyes On You (pop rock)

146. Emily Reo - Phosphenes (dreampop)

145. Sigrid - Don't Feel Like Crying (dance pop)

144. Plastic Mermaid - Floating in a Vacuum (dreampop)

143. Big Data - See Through (electro industrial)

142. MIYAVI - No Sleep Til Tokyo (dance punk)

141. The East Pointers - Wintergreen (trad folk)

140. Palehound - Urban Drip (indie rock)

139. Ronnie Tibbs - Sunlight (electropop)

138. Lindsey Stirling feat. Elle King  - The Upside (classical crossover)

137. Montaigne - CHANGE (pop)

136. Friendly Fires - Can’t Wait Forever (nu disco)

135. Black Violin - A Way Home (RnB)

134. harumakigohan - Aster (Japanese vocaloid chip pop)

133. Cassadee Pope - One More Red Light (pop country)

132. Calliope Musicals - Cosmic Poison Arrow (circus carnival psychedelia)

131. Kyle Craft & Showboat Honey - Buzzkill Caterwaul (glam rock)

130. The Infamous Stringdusters - Planets (bluegrass)

129. Mika - The Sound of an Orchestra (pop)

128. Flor - White Noise (indie pop)

127. Versengold - Der Tag, an dem die Götter sich betranken (Pagan folk)

126. The Head and the Heart - Brenda (indie folk rock)

125. Ra Ra Riot - Bitter Conversation (pop rock)

124. Mindy Gledhill - Boo Hoo! (folk pop)

123. Mika - Stay High (pop)

122. I Know Leopard - Evergreen (dreampop)

121. Tredici Bacci - Felicity Grows (Bacharach-channelling art pop)

120. !!! - Serbia Drums (dance punk)

119. Small Talks - Honeydew (indie rock)

118. Royal Teeth - Rivalry (indie pop)

117. Sound of Ceres - Fire Lily (dreampop)

116. Robert Ellis - When You’re Away (trad rock)

115. Sleepwalkers - I Can’t Wait (indie pop)

114. Bleached - Hard To Kill (garage rock)

113. Keane - Stupid Things (soft rock)

112. LukHash - Cassette (chip pop)

111. Stealing Sheep - Girl (experimental pop)

110. PinocchioP - Mei Mei (Japanese vocaloid chip pop)

109. Nolan Potter’s Nightmare Band - Caberfae Peaks (jazz fusion)

108. Overcoats - The Fool (indie pop)

107. Rvby My Dear - 10:17 (dreampop)

106. BABYMETAL - Shanti Shanti Shanti (J-pop metal)

105. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Fishing For Fishies (boogie rock)

104. Slayyyter - E-Boy (experimental pop)

103. Holy Ghost! - Slow Burn (nu disco)

102. AURORA - Animal (dreampop)

101. MM9 - When It Kills You (electro industrial)

100. CHAI - THIS IS CHAI (Japanese psych punk)

99. Mono Mind - Sugar Rush (indie pop)

98. The Rocket Summer - Peace Signs (indie rock)

97. MisterWives - Find My Way Home (indie pop)

96. Bruce Hornsby - Take You There (Misty) (orchestral rock)

95. Lana Del Rey - Doin’ Time (psychedelic pop)

94. The Soft Cavalry - The Ever Turning Wheel (dreampop)

93. Andy Black - Westwood Road (pop rock)

92. The Cat Empire - Adelphia (Latin rock)

91. Maps - New Star (dreampop)

90. Kim Petras feat. SOPHIE - 1,2,3 Dayz Up (experimental pop)

89. The Avett Brothers - New Woman’s World (alt country)

88. Of Monsters And Men - Róróró (folk pop)

87. Jade Bird - I Get No Joy (pop rock)

86. Big Wreck - Give Us A Smile (alt rock)

85. Caravan Palace - Supersonics (electroswing)

84. The Western Den - Company (experimental folk)

83. Marika Hackman - Come Undone (alt folk-rock)

82. Kyle Craft & Showboat Honey - She’s Lily Riptide (glam rock)

81. Galactic feat. Boyfriend - Dance At My Funeral (jam rock)

80. BAILEN - Bottle It Up (pop rock)

79. Joyero - Steepest Stairs (experimental pop)

78. Runaway June - The Trouble With This Town (pop country)

77. Vesper Wood - Descend (dark folk)

76. Jadu Heart - Forgotten Ghosts (dreampop)

75. Attaboy - Giving Up The Fight (electropop)

74. AURORA - The Seed (dreampop)

73. AJR - Birthday Party (indie pop)

72. Lady Antebellum - Alright (pop country)

71. Bossy Love - Up All Over Me (bouncestep)

70. The Twang - Went Walking (alt rock)

69. Vampire Weekend - Stranger (indie rock)

68. Biffy Clyro - The Modern Leper (A Celebration of Frightened Rabbit) (indie rock)

67. Blanck Mass - Hush Money (electro industrial)

66. ヨルシカ - だから僕は音楽を辞めた (日本オの インディーロック)

65. Chris Farren - Domain Lapse (indie pop)

64. Polkadot Stingray - Uchoten (Japanese jazz rock)

63. Jade Bird - Love Has All Been Done Before (pop rock)

62. The Faint - Life’s A Joke (electropop)

61. The New Pornographers - The Surprise Knock (indie rock)

60. Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds - This Is The Place (pop rock)

59. Boy & Bear - Suck On Light (indie folk rock)

58. Warmland - Sweet & Sour (indie pop)

57. Salvatore Ganacci - Cake (electro house)

56. Bang Bang Romeo - Over My Dead Body (rock and/or roll)

55. Mr. B The Gentleman Rhymer - Looking Forward To Leaving (chap hop)

54. Bleached - Somebody Dial 911 (garage rock)

53. Telekinesis - Suburban Streetlight Drunk (power pop)

52. Gaby Moreno & Van Dyke Parks - The Immigrants (baroque pop)

51. The LaFontaines - Anything At All (Scottish hiphop)

50. La Casa Azul - Podría Ser Peor (Spanish nu disco)

49. Geowulf - Lonely (pop rock)

48. IDER - Mirror (folk pop)

47. Cold Water Company - Brothers (trad folk)

46. Kishi Bashi - Summer of ‘42 (psychedelic pop)

45. Little Big - I’m OK (funeral rave)

44. Keane - Love Too Much (pop rock)

43. Cage The Elephant - Skin & Bone (indie rock)

42. Biffy Clyro - All Singing And All Dancing (indie pop rock)

41. Holly Herndon - Eternal (experimental electronica)

40. MISSIO - Rad Drugz (electro rock)

39. Royal Republic - Can’t Fight The Disco (dance rock)

38. Thomas Rhett - Up (pop country)

37. dodie - She (indie folk)

36. Bang Bang Romeo - Cemetery (rock and/or roll)

35. New Found Glory - This Is Me (pop punk cover of yes that song from The Greatest Showman, trust me it works)

34. Charlotte Gainsbourg - Such a Remarkable Day (electro chanson)

33. Liam Gallagher - One of Us (alt rock)

32. Broods - Peach (indie pop)

31. NEEDSHES - Truth Power (Uzbek art rock)

30. Vampire Weekend - This Life (indie rock)

29. Marshmello feat. Chvrches - Here With Me (EDM pop)

28. The Magpie Salute - In Here (blues rock)

27. AURORA - The River (dreampop)

26. Lana Del Rey - Venice Bitch (psychedelic pop)

25. White Reaper - Real Long Time (post punk)

24. Altın Gün - Leyla (Turkish psychedelic rock)

23. Wylder - Ready To Break (folk pop)

22. Joseph - Revolving Door (indie folk)

21. Montaigne - Losing My Mind (indie pop)

20. Dear Boy - Anything At All (shoegaze)

19. Denzel Curry & slowthai - Psycho (experimental hiphop)

18. ViVii - Siv (You & I) (dreampop)

17. Weezer - High As A Kite (indie rock)

16. Sundara Karma - Little Smart Houses (art pop)

15. Sleepwalkers - American Nights (pop rock)

14. Walk Off The Earth - Under A Tree (indie pop)

13. The Pernice Brothers - The Devil & The Jinn (indie folk rock)

12. White Lies - Tokyo (post punk)

11. GIRLI - Friday Night Big Screen (electropop)

10. Warren Dunes - Crosstown Villain (psychedelic pop)

9. Dave - Lesley (UK rap)

8. Barrie - Chinatown (dreampop)

7. whenyoung - In My Dreams (shoegaze)

6. Andrew Bird - Sisyphus (indie folk rock)

5. Moon Taxi - Now’s The Time (indie pop)

4. Half Moon Run - Favourite Boy (indie rock)

3. Vampire Weekend - Harmony Hall (indie pop)

2. ViVii - Suckerpunch (dreampop)

1. Dear Boy - Limelight (new wave)

And there we have it. Sam and my combined #1 of the year would be Harmony Hall from Vampire Weekend (my #3, his #2 of the year). Go see what other crossover we have if you want.

If you want to check them out, and have GPM available to you (e.g. you have a GPM account, or YouTube premium), you can take a look at the playlist here.

Until next year, then, for you. For me, the 2020 music project starts again in 5 days’ time. This is the fifth year in a row of 1000 Albums. I feel confident now that we’ll make it.

[oceangl1tter]

sum thoughts on dim thoughts,,

i always hit a point of the night after a mind-draining day in which i reconsider several points of my lifetrack:

1) 

that I would be infinitely attracted to the arts and creating rather than falling asleep in a lecture hall of 400 to the lovely sounds of numbers being raked with chalk. i'm falling behind in one and falling asleep in the other. in another timeline i apply to artschool instead of misleading myself with profits of a CS degree; in another timeline maybe my technique is better and i've finally given all my OCs the descriptions they deserve. i thought this would be a good compromise though it would be a lie to say that both my desires can be achieved without one suffering. maybe down the road when i'm 50 i'll drop everything and go back to my roots of making stick figure heroines fight off dragons to save the (middle-aged?) princess. sappy phiction.

i mean, do i value the concept of filial obligations and my family's opinions enough to stave off internal grievances? or do i just place my family as the obstacle to these wants when really it could just be my personal fear of committing to what i sincerely enjoy, failing because i can't do it and i don't know how, fears i verbalize quite often even without full commitment, and affirming what i was told would happen? and not being able to return what had been done for me? do i even owe them anything? does this keep them up at night too? does what had been done for me outweigh what had been done to me?

2)

i do not think i will ever come out to my mother, if anything she'd probably know already by the third thanksgiving when i don't bring back a boyfriend to introduce. what i do know is that this is something that i will have to confront soon. maybe 4+ years ago it was a problem for future amanda to take care of, but now the future is here and present amanda cannot postpone it anymore. something has to radically change, in appearance or attitude.  something has to compensate. i will have to be exceptional if i want to be accepted. i tell her that kai has left his cap and mom replies that cousin doesn't let her sons wear anything pink. i think of kai in our living room with a playful grin smothered on his face, pink baseball cap on that he proudly wears and later leaves on my couch. i also think of jay, the first child, strong-headed older brother who tells him that he can't wear that because it's not for boys. i buy $8 cvs balloons for them both. mom says on the phone that she's heard on the radio that the medication makes you think like a man, a euphemism i can only slightly catch in cantonese. i can't remember a time in which not feeling sad meant suddenly having men-specific thoughts, i'm assuming ones related to desire, and I should argue that it's the exact opposite! didn't you know? sad is basically spelled gay backwards. there are an astounding amount of  cases of The Gays always being either a disaster, depressed, or romantically-delusional (or all of the above). instead, if we could reverse these negative feelings from people and straighten them out maybe we could rid of these perverse people from an otherwise perfectly fine and happy, happy, straight world!!!!

3) 

my sister's fortune-reading co-worker reads the dynamic between us three. as the first, my first sister is restrained and restricted because of responsibilities as the oldest, acting as the closest, dangerously co-dependent bind to the family, and will be dissatisfied until she is old. as the youngest, i have the most space to roam free and change, as she shoulders the weight. my 2nd sister, being the middle child, has the choice to lean towards the youngest or oldest depending on the situation. i'm not sure if she really did a personal reading but she's not wrong. if we were all to write a personal account about our family, you would think you'd be reading about different parents. in our house there are gaps in all of the photographs. too many years have been blurred together and i know i need to start documenting before it's too late and we've gone too far in burying it all. 

4)

our insecurities may just be how we judge others. if i judge others this way, then i must expect that others would view me this way as well. then it turns into this cycle of obsessively alienating ourselves amongst people that are really no different from us. i feel like i'm getting into the "we're only one race—the human race" bullshit but we're all in glass  rooms, the door's bloody open but we don't step out for once. maybe that's why poop and farting jokes are universally funny. it's a shared experience and yet we hide it? don't hide, shit in public is what i'm trying to say. (not actually) where was i going with this? a point of the lifetrack: how do i reconcile the parts of myself i've scattered to different people? is it necessary? or can i just keep shapeshifting until i realize i can't bounce with the boys AND be a lonely cat lady?  though if i do pull these fragments together and succeed at it, how many people would i lose? i was a people pleaser so much so that i'd rather live for others than live alone at home. i'm a goddamn DIMSUM LOBSTER!! IN THOSE SEA TANKS!!! sea tanks seem like an oxymoron.

SALUTATIONS EARTH-SPECIMEN. I AM PICKLEHEAD & THIS IS MY SPACE.://

My first scrawls were when I was 10 years-old in a yellow notebook I titled,”The Book of Knowledge (Part 1)”. Little did I know at that time, my mind at age 10 definitely did not hold all of the possible corners of the universe, but the Book of Knowledge (Part 1), provided a gateway for me to possess writing superpowers to explore and engage in the unknown. Now five years later, I enjoy drawing, playing video games, and jamming to music while orbiting around Earth. The book of Knowledge (Part 2) is also in the making.

Alien Adventures first manifested through 15 years of awkwardly worded sentences from my awkwardly constructed thoughts and has now been compressed in this blog with a million presses of the Backspace button. Designed to capture my (2016) year-long writing endeavors, Alien Adventures holds pieces of my version of the universe and hopefully resonates with some shards of yours.

May '16: schoolbl0g: parting the passion sea://

Perhaps these were just “Asian Mom” things but as a child I was enrolled in almost everything I did NOT want to be enrolled in. From tapdancing to ballet to hiphop, my mother did not realize that my joints just could not seem to coordinate together..regardless of which music was playing. It’s also worth mentioning that she would enroll me to the less expensive lower-level classes, meaning that I was the top of the pack…being almost 3 years older than the other toddlers in their tutus. Years after those dance lessons  it’s safe for me to say that I sincerely cannot touch my toes, cannot move  my hips in rhythmic manner, nor pitter patter with my feet, but I came to the realization that: Art has never come easy. Especially when you’re five years-old plopped in front of a wall (that’s supposed to the canvas) trying to mix green crayola and black crayola to somehow get yellow. Expression through crayola was just as complicated as expression through the movement of the body and although coloring never became my forte (and neither did dance) art morphed into a love-hate relationship full of my crayon tears. I wasn’t that great at it, given that my wall-canvas was scribbled with green and black smears,but I imagined. And what I imagined I wanted to draw-and unfortunately what I drew was not what I imagined. So I continued.

If I can picture it in my head, how could it be so hard to translate it onto paper?

[dippedanddripped]

Roxanne Shanté Discusses Hip-Hop's Impact On American Culture | GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop

[dippedanddripped]

J.J. Fad Shout Out Their Fans For Giving Them Life At "A GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop"

[dippedanddripped]

Kool DJ Red Alert Reflects On The Progression Of Rap At "A GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop"

[dippedanddripped]

KRS-One Has A Problem With Grammys Hip Hop 50 Show For This Reason

[dippedanddripped]

Questlove Describes The Rap Song That Began His Journey | "A GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop"

[dippedanddripped]

Yo-Yo & The Lady Of Rage Explain Why "A GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop" Is For Everybody

[dippedanddripped]

Akon & Styles P On Rap's Evolution As A Global Phenomenon | A GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop

[dippedanddripped]

T.I. Explains Why He's Humbled To Take The Stage At "A GRAMMY Salute To 50 Years Of Hip-Hop"