#seeing it all animated has made it 10 times worse like how tf am i supposed to recover

[crystu-cii]

XDD

I f e e l that pain in my soul-- my older sister uses cologne sometimes and it is sO STRONG AND WILL NOT STAY CONFINED TO HER ROOM-- AMD SOMETIMES SHED DO IT IN THE DOORWAY LIKE HELLO-- XDD

YEAH WH GET SOME SLEEP LEAVE THE STAYING UP TO US-- XDD

YES BABY JAIL, INTO THE UPSIDE DOWN LAUNDRY BASKET YOU KNIFE-WIELDING HEATHEN-- XDD oms XDD well I don't know them but I love them- YESSS THEYRE SO FLUFFY-- I'm actually curious what images pop up first imma check-- FLUFFY PUPPIES-- we've actually never owned ones that fluffy(those actually look more similar to shetland sheepdogs than the shelties we've had so far?? Very similar/similar enough where if someone doesn't know a sheltie we mention shetland sheepdogs), our current one is a purebred that we got for free(she was being given away bc her family never came back for her and the lady taking care of her couldn't afford the time to take care of a second dog long-term think) and she's got pretty short fur in comparison- still fluffy enough, but not quite so long of fur-- she's a blue merle(absolutely gorgeous fur, she's like 8 now with a lot of health problems but she's super loving still 💕💞) anyways about the fur, so long as you brush regularly you should mitigate most of that, and it mostly collects in corners- but like.. be prepared to eat and wear dog fur for the rest of your life-- (actually there's a thing called a fur zapper we bought recent that you put in with your clothes when you wash/dry them(I think it's dry but idk??) that's supposed to get a lot of hair off your clothes in that process? Also lint rollers are your best friend--) AND roombas are really helpful(we bought a knockoff one and rarely have to sweep ever so 👀) XDD WHEEZE I can't even imagine what you did-- but like you could ask for a budgie/parakeet /hj I mean, they aren't very expensive (actually they're pretty cheap) but they're very loud, need a lot of attention(especially if you want them to bond to you!) and you need to research into them a lot to make sure you're doing things right-- loads of vids online!! Loads of websites too!!! I'd know I have one- JUST A WARNING, FEATHERS AND SEED HULLS GET ALL OVER YOUR FLOOR XD p l u s like you have a friend who knows stuff about birbs :3 anyways ENOUGH RAMBLING FROM ME WOW THAT GOT LONG--

💕💕 I feel that XD OMS-- I WISH-- WHAT A D R E A M - s n a k - Awww but what a mood XD

XDDD oms YES-- EXACTLY-- XDDDD another good thing you should try eventually is SWEET POTATO CASSEROLE WHICH IS APPARENTLY DELICIOUS??? I TRIED IT FOR THE FIRST TIME(AT LEAST IN A WHILE) TODAY AND IT WAS SO FUCKIN TASTY????

H E A THEN-- XDD how cool of them to try tho :3 whEEZE Y 'A LL-- XDD

WHEEZE I SUCK WITH INSTRUMENTS SOOOO-- DAMN THA'S SOME BAD LUCK MY DUDE-- MAYBE YOU'RE CURSED DAMN-- oms wOWW--

Yesss-- ooh I've never played 👀 seen some stuff but never played-- (see: my computer sucks XD) I h a v e played Portal 1 and it is SO GOOD and SO SHORT and I WISH I HAD GOTTEN PORTAL 2 INSTEAD BUT THATS OKAY CRIES-- YESSSS THE SONGS SLAP--- ALSO THERE ARE ACTUALLY TWO WHOLE MORE CANON(PROBABLY KINDA MAYBE NOT?? IDK) SONGS, ONE FROM A LEG DIMENSIONS GAME("You Wouldn't Know") AND ONE THAT WAS CUT FROM PORT TWO("Don't Say Goodbye"(Harry101UK made an edit to make it Glados' voice!!)) THERE ARE ALSO A BUNCH OF GOOD FAN SONGS SO YEAH-- ALSO NOT TO BE A SIMP BUT GLADOS' VOICE? PERFECTION. I LOVE HER. ALSO I COULD LITERALLY DETAIL THE PORTAL LORE I AM INCREDIBLY EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN THIS GAME-- ALSO THERES A CLIP THAT SOMEONE MADE USING A (VERY GOOD) GLADOS TTS TO HAVE GLADOS SAY TRANS RIGHTS AND ENBY RIGHTS AND IF I FIND IT AGAIN ILL SEND IT TO YOU-- YOU COULD PROBABLY FIND IT IF YOU LOOM UP GLADOS SAYS TRANS RIGHTS? IT HAS A VIDEO WITH TRANS FLAG COMPANION CUBES ACCOMPANYING IT-- ALSO YES THE PORT MODS(/ADD-ONS? MAYBE? THEY'RE COMMUNITY MADE I THINK BUT IDK ALL I KNOW IS THAT THEYRE COOL AF--) (also I apologize for all the screaming? XD it's like, four am and I was talking about portal so.. whoops?)

Right like wth???? I???? Okay but like December to February babies just fuckin DONT EXIST IN THIS GEN OR SOMETHIN-- CAUSE I FIND N O N E -- Maybe there are more December babies but there are definitely like NO January to February babies it is So Weird--

NEJFQOBGKW WOWW d an g like-p l e a se s t op over sp r aying-- xD and LEGITTTT LIKE- THAT WAS M Y ROLE TO STAY UP LATE- XDD

WHEHEHEZE- LAUNDRY BASKET TIME- G E T I N XDD anD YESS- any doggo is just such a cute doggo 😭💞💞 but for me- fLUFFY ONES ARE WHERE ITS A T- and ohhhh i see- FOR FREE?? W H A T A S T E A L XDD but awwww the poor doggg at least she's with you now ! ;0;; 💞💞😭 aaw such a lovable puppup 😭😭💞 and oHHH i see :00 but oh no- xD i also have a friend that has two dogs and whenever he would give me gifts- there would be dog hair on them no matter what- XDD and ooOhhh those sound really helpful! omg- i swear i dont have to have a pet for the need of a roomba- i already shed so much hair myself its so crazy-- xDD and oH MAN loud animals are really gon get my mom fired up- and OO birds just look so cuteee i always fantasize of having one- but then again- with the noise and all xD the more i think about it i dont think we are prepared to have a pet at all xD but i still dream of at least having one pet in my lifetime!

and OO that sounds awesome!! i have no clue if i even tried casserole before- man- sometimes i just eat food without even knowing wth it is XDDD but THAT SOUNDS so gooodddd :O

and LEGITT LIKE- TF IS HAPPENING WITH MY SCHOOL LIFE- XDD and oh my god- IT GETS WORSE- that year there was a FREAKINGG FIREEEEEEE- it wasnt that dangerous thank god- but it had to get a whole ass room renovated because of it- and guess what room it was- THE ORCHESTRA ROOM- AND GUESS WHAT M A D E I T W OR SE- that year- it was the first time the school replaced those 10+ year old instruments with new ones- NOW THEYRE B U R N T- and mind you that the school's budget isnt so- gr e a t- like oh my god i am still so bewildered over HOW MUCH chaos HAPPENED that year- and i thought that year was gon be the year- yknow? like UGH

and OHH MANN playing portal sounds awesome! but i just dont think the game would be worth my money cause i know the plot- and even with the mods and all my brain would be broken as i would possibly have no clue what to do- xDDD

and HOOOO MANNN game fan songs are just so AWESOMEEE- and those sound pretty cool! :OO and HOLY SHIT FUCK YEAH- GLADOS SAYS TRANS AND ENBY RIGHTS Y A LL- now im gonna look that up and let my ears be blessed by such words- XDDD and DONT WORRY BOUT SCREAMING ALOT- i scream a whole dam lot too XDD

and LEGITTT- finding someone's b-day in january and feb is so rare all of a sudden like wh a t - XDD

[bevendre]

I had a stray thought regarding gnolls last night that kind of spiraled out of control, as such things do.  Look below for a thing if you’re so inclined and not opposed to some TF and TG themes.

20 Diearanfohr, 809 P.S.

 My companions and I set out for Ahredel early in the day, our wagons full with curious mechanical trinkets, finely carved stonework and masterworks of wood and metal.  As always, it pains me to see the wagons so lightly stocked, but such is the way of trade along the Pathways.  We’ll unload without issue in Ahredel and be full to bursting with fresh goods again within a fortnight, though whether we turn back to Dehrvhat or around the Spine to Zephyrdel is up in the air still.

               With the word of danger on the roads and the trouble that rode into Dehrvhat not a week past I’m a little wary for the trip north. A couple swords and a bowman do not a proper guard make anymore.  I still say that we should have waited another day or two for the group who helped the captain from Ahredel.  I understand the need to move, but still, I’d rather miss our window and arrive safely than end up little more than a bleached skull among the sands.  Luckily there have been no sightings of any danger so far, and we’ve been riding for most of the day already.  With luck, we’ll see Ahredel’s walls within the week.

 21 Diearanfohr, 809 P.S.

                 The night came and went without issue, though one of the sellswords says he saw something or other nearby.  He didn’t get a clear look at whatever it was, and his companions are adamant that he has a history of seeing mirages and spirits. Still, I’m concerned.  With luck it was just some stray creature, or better yet nothing at all.  I offered a prayer to Vuriin early today, and may make an offering of part of my midday meal to Qatatan just in case.

               I take back any complaints I may have had about the wagons not being full of goods.  It’s much more comfortable stealing a short rest in the bed of a wagon than trying to sleep in the saddle, and it’s allowed most of the horses to remain at least partially rested through the day.  Even those drawing the wagons seem happy to not have as much weight behind them.  Midday approaches, and already we’re further than I had anticipated.  Should the weather hold we may reach Ahredel well ahead of schedule.  That in itself is a weight off my shoulders.

 23 Diearanfohr, 809 P.S.

                 I knew we should have waited.  I knew three men wouldn’t be enough.  One of them bolted at the first sign of trouble, and another turned coward as soon as he took an arrow.  They’re not worth the gold we spent on them.  I’m going to miss the horses more though, they were the first to be targeted.  For savages the creatures that have taken us are deceptively clever.  That they seem near as strong as the horses they slaughtered is concerning though.

               The goods from Dehrvhat are likely smashed and scattered to the winds by now, the savage beasts seemed unconcerned with even the finest of pieces after they’d slaughtered our escort.  They ran down the bowman and cut the coward’s throat, but they ate the other alive.  I don’t know if I should pity or envy the men we hired.  My companions and I have been piled into our wagons, most of us bound. The savage beast-men seem to have taken some interest in me though, and have left my hands free.  They seem particularly fascinated with my journal, and are watching me intently even now.  I don’t know if they can read, or even speak for that matter, I’ve not caught a one of them using a word.

               We’ve been moving almost nonstop since they took us yesterday.  It’s a wonder that these creatures are as tenacious as they seem to be.  I know one of them was injured rather badly during the battle, but seems to be managing without complaint.  I’ve seen it licking the wound, but otherwise it doesn’t seem phased by it.  They all seem content with eating while they walk, though I must say that their diet is appalling.  Those men did not deserve this.

25 Diearanfohr, 809 P.S.

                 We reached what I can only assume is their camp or home.  Whatever it is, there are many more of these creatures, and I think I’m starting to find some differences between the members.  The leader of the group that took us captive is certainly larger, and its fur is significantly thicker and more matted than most of the others.  One thing I’m certain about though, nearly all of them are male.  They’re filthy as well.  I’ve not seen any of the creatures bathing with water or sand, and the ones who have been with us are still caked with viscera.

               We’ve been left in some form of hide structure, I can’t in good faith call it leather.  We’ve all been tied to a central pole, and there are never fewer than two of the creatures watching us.  I can hear them yipping and yapping inanely while I’m writing now.  The entire camp is a cacophony of yips and barks, it’s almost maddening.  The grumbling in my stomach isn’t helping either, they’ve not fed us since they took us captive.

 26 Diearanfohr, 809 P.S.

                 I saw what I’m fairly certain is a female of the species last night shortly after drying my quill.  The seems to be the only one in the group, at least that I know of, and is surprisingly larger than even the leader of the group that took us. None of these creatures wear much, but she was clothed shockingly conservatively, though it did little to hide anything.  She looked over each of us one by one, and paid special attention to me.  She was pointed to my journal and skimmed through it with the closest thing to understanding that I’ve seen from these creatures, and was very animated in her yipping and growling.  She wouldn’t leave until I started writing again, just a few notes and some rough drawings were enough.

               She took Devin with her when she left.  I’ve not seen him since, but they’ve provided some food.  I fear what it most likely is, but I’m too hungry to care at this point.  Devin, if it is you, I’m so sorry.

 30 Diearanfohr, 809 P.S.

                 It’s festival day, I’m almost positive of it. I might be off by a day or two. It’s hard to tell.  The creatures have been starving us again, though Cedric and Iden have both been taken. I can only assume they’ve been killed or eaten, and I desperately hope it was quick.  They were good men.

               I’ve busied myself with taking notes on the creatures.  They are crude, but clever and seem to worship something, though I’m not sure what. I’ve seen the shadows of them dancing outside the tent at night.  The smallest among them is easily taller than I am, and wiry, but strong.  I don’t doubt that he could break me with ease if he was given the order.  The female looks to be the head of the tribe, all the others defer to her, even the large male.

               At last, it looks like it’s time for another meal. I pray that my friends had peaceful ends, and I pray that the meat these creatures are offering us isn’t them, but I’m almost dizzy with hunger.  Cedric, Iden, forgive me.

 7 Shemhein, 809 P.S.

                 Meals are coming more often, thankfully, though our numbers are beginning to dwindle more quickly now. It’s just me and a couple others.  They’ve been looking at me strangely the past couple days, though I don’t know if it’s from concern or jealousy.  I’m the first one fed, and my portions are larger.  This diet is the last thing that I would have asked for in any other circumstance, but strangely I don’t mind it anymore.  It keeps hunger from gnawing at my belly, that’s the important part.

               I fear it’s having some side effects, however. I’ve had trouble sleeping the last couple of nights, bad dreams, though I can’t recall them once I’ve woken. I’ve noticed some swelling in my hands as well which has made writing marginally more difficult.  I wish I could have some form of looking glass as well, it’s been some time since I last shaved, and my face is beginning to itch.

 10 Shemhein, 809 P.S.

                 There’s definitely something happening to me.  I fear I’m beginning to lose my mind.  The dreams are starting to bleed into day, and there’s always this low snarl in the back of my mind.  I feel like I’m starving too, though it can’t have been more than a couple hours since I last ate.  I find myself craving food, meat, more and more.  The last meal I had I could hardly get through without demanding more, and they’d hardly cooked it!  This seemed to please the guards who were there, and the female.  She’s taken to watching me eat as avidly as she’s watched me write.

               There’s definite swelling in my hands and feet, and I’ve noticed some strange bruising on my fingertips and palms.  I’m stiff too, and there’s a constant ache low in my back.  Strangely, there’s been a disturbing swelling in my crotch, but there’s little sensation. I’m ill, without question, though the creatures seem almost excited about it.

               I’d almost forgotten, I’m the last one left. Tiernay looked half dead when they took him away.  Poor bastard. Hopefully it means the next meal will be soon.

 18 Shemhein, 809 P.S.

                 Good news, I’m not ill it seems. Unfortunately the bad news is far far worse than any sickness I could have.  I’m changing.  These creatures know, they have known, they must have known.  My clothes have been taken away and I’ve had a little time to be reacquainted with my body.  There’s a lot more hair on my chest and arms than I remember and it’s mostly lighter than my usual hair, though I can’t help but notice spots.  Spots like them.  There are a couple of welts on my chest that almost look like bug bites, but I can feel them, and they’re sensitive.  There’s been a growing tightness in my crotch, and I’m a little concerned by how often I’m erect.  The pain in my back makes sense now, I’ve got a tail.  It’s only about an inch long and mostly bare still, but it’s a tail!

               The female seems very excited by the changes I’m experiencing, and is very forward with inspecting them.  I think her fascination is the only reason why I’m still allowed to write like this.  It hurts to move.  Not significantly, but it does.  I ache all over now.

 30 Shemhein, 809

                 My face is in agony.  It’s been pressing out for days.  It hurts to open my mouth, but I’m so hungry!  The female has been feeding me herself, and she’s always smiling. She unbound me and let me stand for the first time in weeks?  Balance is weird, my feet are different.  The tail helps some.  Writing’s difficult since my fingers are thicker now.  More like paws.  The claws make gripping a meal easier though.  Something disturbing happened this morning.  I lost one of my balls.  My scrotum’s been painfully tight against my crotch for days, but there’s only one ball in there now.  There’s been swelling in my chest too.  I’m scared, but the female doesn’t seem concerned.

               I’m starting to figure out their language, or at least meaning.  The snarls in the dreams have been teaching me.  It sounds weird, I know, but they have.

   16 Nurlheig, 809

                 Ulra says I’m ready to leave the tent.  My coat is filling out, and my nose is tingly. Jaw still aches sometimes, but feeding helps.  Ulra helped my other ball migrate inside.  There are so many smells outside the tent, and It’s strange feeling wet there now.  I hadn’t realized how big I’d gotten.  Ulra’s still taller, but now I’m bigger than most of the males.

               The dream voice speaks to me all the time now. He has made things easier.  I feel like I’m forgetting things more easily, but I’m strangely calm about it.

 1 Eirnir, 810

               Ulra says I’m home.  I feel home.  I shouldn’t feel home.  Ulra and males make it easier.  Males bring food whenever I ask.  I’m big. Big as Ulra.  Strong.

               Master’s voice fills my dreams.  Ulra asks if I can hear him.  She was happy when I said yes

 23, 810

                 Words fading.  Hard to think straight.  Males keep calling in night.  They smell me.  I smell them. So warm.  Cock is hard all times, no hole.  Only wet hole now.  Breasts tender.  Hungry. Both holes hungry.

               Master’s voice proud.  Ulra proud.  Says soon be bride for Master. Makes warm worse.

[jejublr]

boyfriend!wonwoo

A/N: I’m back~ (but will be away again shortly on a vacaycay lmao soz) Basically, I didn’t realize how soft I am for Wonwoo until I finished this one. Like, seriously, I had to stop myself because this got so long. I hope this is something @honeywonu would love bc that girl loves Wonwoo (But also Mingyu? Girl, I’m confused. You like him or nah?). Anyways, I have something else popping out by the end of this week so I hope you’ll be looking forward to it, friends!

at first you weren’t even sure if he likes you?

like, he avoided you at all cost like you had the plague or something

always had this weird look on his face whenever you’re around

you know which face I’m talking about

it wasn’t until you started getting these cute poems out of the blue

and you don’t know that many people who would go out of their way to confess to someone like this

fine, you only know one but he kinda, don’t like you, right?

lmao wrong bc the boy asked you out when he realized you’re not gonna make a move soon

“wonwoo, are you asking me out?”

“I–I.. no! I mean, yeah?? yes..”

didn’t expect you to say yes and he then he has the cutest grin on his face and his nose was all scrunched up

you weren’t even sure if the guy liked you at first because he seemed so distant

and it did take it you a long time for him to warm up to you but it’s totally worth it

him opening up and getting super comfortable around you reminds you how flowers bloom

 AND HIS CUTE EXPRESSIONS!

whenever he’s confused or get excited over the smallest things his face just scrunches

and it’s,,, cute UGH

you guys would become the ultimate geek couple

nerding out about recent anime/video games with him

speaking of video games

bOI, is he hardcore

so freaking loud

you can be doing your chores quietly in the room next door and you’d jump every 10 minutes bc this guy is so into it

“wonwoo, istg I will pull out the cable if you don’t tone it down.”

quite but very loving in public

I don’t think he’s the type to show a lot of skinship in public so he’ll probably settle with hand holding

although~ he’s very down for cuddles when you’re at home~

CAT CAFÉ DATES!!!

the cats love him!!!

seeing him surrounded by cats and going soft because he looks so cute running his hands through their soft fur in child-like amazement

you secretly took so many pictures of him and made one your home screen shh

BUT ALSO STARGAZING DATES!!!

bc he reads so much romance?? he’s definitely a romantic under all that emo

can you imagine tho?

you guys would probably take a weekend trip to the countryside to watch the stars

you and him lying down on a picnic rug, trying to name all the constellations

him telling you random space facts

“did you know that hundreds of years from now, our galaxy the milky way is going to merge with andromeda? the stars will literally litter the sky.”

halfway through it, he’d just end up watching you admiring the sky instead

bc he’s watching the stars with someone with stars in their eyes themselves??

RANDOM AEGYO

“aing~!”

“tf? did you just..? who are you and what did you do to wonwoo?”

will stop in the middle of the street just to pet every cat he sees

but will shove you into the dirt he sees a dog lmaoo

also I would like to remind you how huge of a bookworm wonwoo is

takes care of his collection of books very meticulously

dusts them and makes sure there isn’t any folded pages or anything

“babe, not that I don’t love you but if there’s a fire, I’d save these books first. you have legs, right? you can get out by yourself.”

loves to hear you read out to him while he rests his head on your lap, with one of your hand brushing through his hair while you read to him

you have to beg him hard enough to hear that smooth-ass deep voice read to you

but he’ll sing to you if you ask him nicely enough

him singing you to sleep with his deep voice and the gentle rumble of his chest lulling you to sleep

calm mornings and tangled feet

he lives for neck kisses tbh

him telling you random facts he’s read somewhere

“did you know that water came from magma?”

“no way.”

“yes way.”

s*** when it comes to taking selfies

“babe, how about this angle?”

“no, wonwoo that’s bad.”

“how about this?”

“that’s even wORsE, oh my god.”

“yOU take it then.”

him being playful at the most random moments

like, one moment he’d be quietly reading a book but then he’d peck you out of the blue

“wtf, won?”

“...I love you.”

sloth-woo

like you’ll be vacuuming the room while he lies down singing Mr. Simple off-key

“hEy Mr. sImplE.”

“won, get your lazy bum off the couch and help me, godangit.”

holds your hand in crowded places

he’d blush whenever you compliment him and tell him that he’s cute

also he’ll probably die if you wear one of his sweaters???

“is that.. my sweater??”

“ye, why?”

“...nothing.”

but it’s not nothing bc you can see the tips of his ears getting red but you didn’t say anything bc his sweaters are comfy and it smells like him and you kinda like seeing him get flustered like this so shhh

BUT HE LOVES IT BC SWEATER PAWS UGH

also, he’ll let you borrow his glasses if you ask nicely

him being the practical and pragmatic one whenever you go out shopping with him

“wonwoo, look!!! a marshmallow shooter!!!”

“y/n, we came here for a dish rack and shower curtains, we don’t need a marshmallow shooter.”

you: :(((

proceeded to buy that dang marshmallow shooter bc he couldn’t stand you looking sad

but it’s worth it after seeing you smile

he has a hard time saying “no” to you and you use it to your advantage most of the time lol

PILLOW TALKS!!!

you guys would just face each other and talk about whatever

he gets super talkative at night

also super deep wow

it can go either way:

1) “y/n, where is the line between art and not art?” “oh my god, wonwoo, go to sleep.” “what is art?” “istg wonwoo-”

or 2) you guys go on a lengthy discussion about life and philosophy and everything in between

sends you beautiful poetry

he would send it in a beautiful hand-written letter or text messages and honestly anything as long as it gets to you

you getting texts of his random bursts of inspirations 

a strong, deep bond and unspoken understanding between the two of you

you don’t need big words to show that you care around him

he knows and you know and that’s all that matter

Other Boyfriend!Seventeen

S.Coups | Jeonghan | Joshua | Jun | Hoshi | Wonwoo | Woozi | DK | Mingyu | The8 | Seungkwan | Vernon | Dino 

[kittencaboodleextraordinaire]

“Ok, but I had a Johnny first, and mine is better”: Adventures in Cyberpunk with a snarky headmate

Warning: this post contains considerable discussion of a major plot point in Cyberpunk 2077 which is discussed in the promotional materials (trailers etc) but which is not revealed in-game until after the first segment of the main story (the heist). Those who wish to remain unspoiled may instead view this lovely picture I edited of four raccoons in a trenchcoat (inspired by Critical Role’s playthrough of the absolutely delightful ttrpg Crash Pandas, which I highly encourage everybody in existence to go check out).

This phenomenal piece of art is surely the high point of this post. It can only go downhill from here.

Anyway.

So as we all know, Cyberpunk 2077 was finally released a few days ago to the expected amount of drama and fanfare, and my partner and I have been playing it together, by which I mean he’s been playing and I’ve been providing helpful advice like “We should totally buy the awesome purple car what do you mean you want a motorcycle THE MOTORCYCLE ISN’T PURPLE”. It’s not, y’know, an amazing game, but it’s pretty fun and I have already found multiple characters to ship V with, which I’m sure we can all agree is the truly important thing here. Plus of course there is abundant opportunity to make innuendo at my partner so I am a happy kitten. Mostly. There is one aspect of the story that is proving to be a continual source of awkwardness and general highly disconcerting aura. Namely, Johnny Silverhands.

At some point (I fell asleep for this part so I don’t know exactly what happened), you end up fused with a chip containing the personality of Johnny Silverhands, some kind of sort of famous dude who died a long time ago or something like that. awards self 10/10 stars for that eloquent and informative summary of important plot elements I was totally paying attention to and wasn’t asleep for at all anyway the important thing is there’s a dude hanging out in your brain with you. This is kind of weird and awkward for me, since I also have a dude hanging out in my brain with me. His name is Jonas. Jonas, say hi. J: I’m not a zoo animal and I don’t do tricks, also I reject the idea that this adds to the post in any real way. However you are very lucky because I am bored and complaining at you sounds more fun than going back to sleep. Now I’m tired and it’s 3:30 am go to bed or write the rest of this by your own damn self. That’s basically the same thing I guess.

Jonas is a bit weird. I don’t really have any idea what he is, and it’s not really within the scope of this blog post to discuss it in depth. He is some flavor of alternate personality, he is one of my closest friends, and he is a pain in the ass, much like most of my other friends. Having Jonas around is uncannily like V’s experience sharing their brain with Johnny Silverhands. Now I have a few other friends who have multiple personalities, one of whom is watching playthroughs of Cyberpunk and has appropriately described the experience as “pretty fucky”, which about sums it up. However it’s made even worse for me personally by the sheer number of similarities between Jonas and Johnny and their interactions with the people they share heads with, for (the most obvious) example, their names are really fucking similar. Jonas has matured a lot since he started appearing about 6-7 years ago but Johnny’s snark, unhelpfulness, complete disinterest in being nice, and even his body language all scream of Jonas’s original behavior, which, let’s be honest here, he still does all that anyway, he’s just nicer about it because he likes me. When Jonas and I talk, we tend to picture him as standing (or sitting or leaning against the wall or whatever) somewhere in the room with me, much as Johnny appears to V. He’s not active all the time and until very very recently was almost never “in charge”, so to speak, much like Johnny. So what we have here is somebody who acts a fuck of a lot like Jonas, has a similar name to Jonas, and interacts with their host in a manner that is almost a perfect match to how Jonas interacts with me. Somehow all of this went over my head. Then something even more uncanny happened.

Now, Jonas was originally an extremely minor character in a vast series of stories that I have made up in my head and never actually written down. He somehow evolved, without any conscious effort on my part, from a bit character who was never meant to do anything besides show up, get scolded by the authorities, and leave, to an increasingly major character, to living in my brain with me. Consequently, while he generally shares my tastes and preferences in terms of food and etc etc etc, there is an extremely major way in which we diverge: Jonas, like Johnny, and unlike me, smokes. All the time. It is Very Important to him. As such, the fact that I do not smoke and have exactly negative one billion interest in ever doing so is a source of intense frustration to him. We have had m a n y arguments about this. He knows not to push it too much and respects that it is my decision but that is not about to stop him from complaining about it loudly and with great passion. So when we encountered a scene of V and Johnny having the exact same fucking argument, ending with the incredibly blatantly Jonasesque lamentation from Johnny “Nonsmokers are the fucking worst”, it was like getting hit in the head with a brick. Actually forget the brick, it was like being hit with an entire building, and then having Jonas stick his head out the window and go “Missed me? ;)”, and then yelling back “WELL IDK BUT MAYBE NEXT TIME YOU’RE PILOTING AN ENTIRE FUCKING BUILDING IF YOU COULD TRY A LITTLE HARDER TO MISS ME THAT’D BE REALLY NICE THANKS” and then having him wink at me and assure me that head trauma builds character. It fucking doesn’t and he knows it.

After that, it was impossible to not see Jonas every time Johnny came onscreen. I still enjoy the game a lot. The setting and story are both really really cool and the loot is A+, and I really love being able to hang out in voice chat with my partner, who currently lives pretty far away, and do something fun together and experience something new. But having my relationship with Jonas, which I still have a lot of conflicting feelings about no matter how much I genuinely believe he’s a positive force in my life, reflected back at me at every turn, is bizarre, surreal, and a constant reminder of issues that have been nagging at me for a while, many of which are explicitly being brought up by the game itself. Last night we were doing a mission where V and Johnny at some point start talking and V mentions how they seem to be getting along better and Johnny suggests that maybe it’s because he’s rubbing off on V. V responds with something to the effect of “Am I becoming more like you, or are you becoming more like me?”. Jonas and I have been asking ourselves the same question for years. The only answer we were ever able to come up with is “probably both”, but the question of how much and to what extent, and if you start blending together with somebody else that much, are you really the same person anymore, and on down the rabbit hole we go, can really eat at you if you’re the kind of person who cares about that sort of thing. Which I guess we both are. And frankly we are probably not even half done with the main storyline and I doubt it’s going to stop posing these questions. 

J: so I said I wasn’t going to have any more of this and went off in a huff but actually I changed my mind I have some stuff to say. 

this is obviously weird for kitsie, and I guess it might be obviously weird for me too but it’s weird in an entirely different kinda way. it’s certainly surreal, and a lot of the questions it keeps bringing up are a lot to think about. Johnny is a program on a computer chip designed to be a copy of the original Johnny’s brain. this raises the question, and this may or may not be addressed later, how real is he? and is he the original Johnny, just on a computer chip now, or is he a different entity who happens to be identical to Johnny? and how is a person on a computer chip embedded on somebody’s brain really different from a person who’s a subroutine in somebody else’s brain? am I real? am I a part of Kitsie that just thinks differently for some reason? are we two facets of a whole being that’s kind of both of us and kind of neither of us? am I just a hitchhiker? I really don’t know. I have a lot of memories and backstory. things I did in the past, before I knew Kitsie. are those memories real? they feel real to me but on the other hand they didn’t actually happen. are Johnny’s memories real? they did happen but he’s a brain scan so did they actually happen to him? it’s a lot to think about, but hard to stop thinking.

and then there’s the other concern, which is that this is a game for kitsie to enjoy with her partner, and whenever this shit happens it wakes me up and I end up feeling really weird, like I’m intruding. which I am.  and as wonderful and understanding as he is, I’m still very much something he is getting used to and having problems adjusting to and I really understand because fuck I’m having a problem adjusting to me too. and maybe it’s stupid but I feel bad for being the disconcerting aura of uncomfortable thoughts wafting through something that’s supposed to be a pleasant and fun evening without me in it. which frankly sums up my entire existence. fuck this I’m tired I’m out of here again go tf to sleep kit.

I had more to say but “what he said” pretty much sums it up.

In conclusion, I don’t really have any objection to the story itself. It’s an interesting concept carried out fairly well that under normal circumstances I would think was really cool, and certainly it’s been a unique experience anyway. And I guess if anything the fact that it’s so unnervingly on the nose is a sign they did a good job? I’m still having a huge amount of fun with the game and the massive backlog of sidequests combined with our minimal ability to focus means that the main quest only takes up a small portion of our playtime in any case. I just needed to get all this shit off my chest.

This has been tonight’s episode of the Kitty Rambles Podcast, I am too tired to think of any good way to end this so goodnight and thank you for tuning in!

[sawyersick]

fuck you all of them

at first I was very confused but then I remembered the ask game thingey

anyways I’m sorry for assaulting you with words lets go

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

I did a lot when I was little, when I was like 4ish I had a theory that everyone around me was actually just the same 50 actors constantly switching outfits to make me think the world was larger than it is

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

I'm afraid of bugs and ghosts so like... 2.25

3. The person you would never want to meet?

idk??? hitler??? Mike Pence??????

4. What is your favorite word?

phalanges, trivial, cordyceps

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

eucalyptus?

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

damn I actually look good without makeup tf

7. What shirt are you wearing?

a purple Hawaii t shirt with surfboards on it

8. What do you label yourself as?

gay???????????????????? punk? tired???? idk

9. Bright room or dark room?

bright

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

trying to fall asleep

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?

8 or 14

12. Who told you they loved you last?

my parents after I started crying after they threatened (again) to kick me out

13. Your worst enemy?

myself I guess

14. What is your current desktop picture?

a flying turtle sharting a rainbow

15. Do you like someone?

I like a lot of people!! but romantically, nobody right now

16. The last song you listened to?

Aderall, by Livewater https://livewater.bandcamp.com/track/adderall

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

Mike Pence???? idk

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

this chick who fucked over all my friends or my ex

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

nobody that's fuckin weird and also a little kinky

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)

my hair always looks pretty good and rarely requires styling/upkeep and my natural colour is actually pretty nice

not showing a pic because I'm lazyyyy

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

I would be a fucking HOT short king and I guess I would try to jack off even though I don't even masturbate and then like....... call men out on their misogyny and privilege

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

I think I'm a good singer!! But I don't sing for anyone because I'm afraid of being judged

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

snails

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

UHHHH burger

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

save it or donate or spend on lolita

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

Japan because I am a WEEB

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? 

I don't drink so I just googled "best brand of alcohol for cooking" and then "best brand of red wine for cooking" and apparently downton abbey has their own brand of wine because that was the first result so yeah that I guess

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? 

don't be a little bitch

29. What is your favorite expletive?

fuck

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

Squid Vicious, the giant me-sized squid plush my friend made for me

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

none of them because they made me who I am today even though that’s cheesy sounding, so maybe something embarrassing rather than abusive/traumatic

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

see #26..... Japan because I'm a WEEEEB

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

luckily nobody close to me has passed yet, so I guess Freddie Mercury because I don't think Kurt Cobain would want to be brought back

34. What was your last dream about?

an awful nightmare about genetically-engineered rabid penis-dogs (i am afraid of sex so it was worse than it sounds)

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

artist? ehhh I guess

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

(gore tw)

yeah I tried to sew my prom dress in a day and the needle stabbed me and broke off inside my finger and they had to surgically remove it from the other side

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

NO AND I REALLY WANT TO

38. What is the color of your socks?

they're a mossy/slate green with little pixel illustrations of totoro characters!!

39. What type of music do you like?

anything rock.............. alt, punk, grunge, etc but I also like a lot of alt/indie stuff too

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

sunsets are prettier I think!

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

chocolate!!!!!

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)

ew sportz

43. Do you have any scars?

a LOT, mostly from weird accidents/self harm

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

i don't even know anymore..................... hopefully a healthcare professional I guess

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I wish I could concentrate better

46. Are you reliable?

online? no im a shitty texter. but when it comes to hanging out? yes absolutely I HATE cancelling plans

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

will I be okay?

48. Do you hold grudges?

yeah I take a lot of shit without saying much so when I get angwy I fuckin lose it

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

cat dolphins!

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

whether or not consensual cannibalism is technically vegan (I say yes and you can fucking fight me)

51. Are you a good liar?

yes.......... unfortunately

52. How long could you go without talking?

I once went without talking for a month and a half

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

growing out my bangs while having this weird noncommittal side part

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

I do all the time!! I also bake birthday cakes for foster children's birthdays

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

not really? I kinda suck at accents..... I can only partially do asian, british, and southern accents

56. What do you like on your toast?

butter usually! Sometimes lemon curd or blueberry jam

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

a house on a hill at night

58. What would be you dream car?

idk I'm not really into cars.... probably a sporty lil vintage sedan

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

I sing in the shower a lot!! and like do little dance moves with my hips

60. Do you believe in aliens?

yeah bro!

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

only if it shows up on social media/in a magazine, I won't seek it out

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

Q! Z! X!

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

DRAGONS

64. What do you think about babies?

they're alright!! They scare me a little tho because I don't want to hurt them...... I prefer kids that are like 6+

[comicteaparty]

May 18th-May 24th, 2020 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from May 18th, 2020 to May 24th, 2020.  The chat focused on Hans Vogel is Dead by Sierra Barnes.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Hans Vogel is Dead by Sierra Barnes~! (https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/hans-vogel-is-dead/list?title_no=62633) You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace until May 24th, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Discussions are freeform, but we do offer discussion prompts in the pins for those who’d like to have them. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic! Whether you finish the comic or can only read a few pages, everyone is welcome to join and chat with us!

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 1

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic?

2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)?

3. Who is your favorite character?

4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most?

5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it!

6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores?

7. What do you like about the comic’s story or overall related content?

8. Overall, what do you think the comic’s strengths are?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

I like the dark tone of this comic. It really reminds you of the more horror-esque side of classic fairy tales that you don't see in modern interpretations (well, ok, you see it in SOME modern interpretations, but not many). Though, I didn't realize what sort of comic this would be going in (I figured it would be something more akin to "the five people you meet in heaven"). So when people started calling Hans "Hansel" and he came across an old cottage I was face-palming a bit lol. I really like the interactions between Hans and Reineke. It feels like this is probably the first time Hans has actually followed through with taking care of someone like he always wanted to do as a kid, and as the story progresses we see the beginnings of Hans unlearning the lessons taught by his father and his country thanks to the interactions with Reineke. Every action and inaction you take has a consequence, and every life has purpose and deserves love (even if nobody else believes they do).

Ed-Money

Agree on the tone. I think the art really contributes to that. I had some trepidations going in as dark fairytale has been played out so many times that you wonder if this will bring something new to the table. But making the setting WWII and a turn to more of the Germanic fairy tales made it work really well. I haven't gotten very far in it but I am really interested in seeing if Hans continues this sort of upward development or if it becomes rockier and there's some relapses. What do you think?

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

Well Not gonna spoil the rest of the reading for you But there is a pretty solid answer to that question lol

RebelVampire

What I like about the beginning of the comic was just how I didn't really know what to expect. Without reading the synopsis before hand, I was presented with a historical fiction setting, yet the art gave it this super eerie tone that made me on edge. So when the fantasy stuff started entering the picture, I was doubly intrigued because it was just not something I was expecting to happen. My favorite moment in the comic so far was actually probably the air battle because of the illustrations surrounding it. Just this beautiful mix of reality and fantasy that really catches your eye, and just overall the emotions felt so high and onpoint for the scene it's really stuck with me. My favorite character so far is definitely Hans. I just love how Hans is this really kind of vulnerable person. And while he has clear flaws, this vulnerability makes him so likeable. It really captures that quick nice niche of horror where the character isn't so helpless it's just a stealth nothing you can do scenario, but the character is also up against stuff beyond their skills so you're frightened for them. The characters I liked seeing interact the most were Hans and the Valkyrie. Cause I could not figure out where tf the Valkyrie stands on Hans, and there were so many hints dropped in that moment that I just want them to meet again so there can be even more context given.

Regarding the art, I just love the overall dark tone and constant changes to match the atmosphere. Like even though theres a cohesive style, the art can change very drastically to emphasize just the right points for each scene that really pulls me in. As for a theme the comic explores, I just gotta say it - I am a sucker for stories that humanize two sides of a war. Cause at the end, most soldiers are just people who are getting screwed over because people in charge couldn't be not jackasses. And while I wouldn't say this is a big theme, I do still like it's there. As for the what I like about the comic's story, honestly, just kind of everything. This is one of those comic's where I went in thinking, "Hmm I don't think this will be my cup of tea." and then I come out of it going "That was amazing." I love the dark fairy tale aspects, the realism aspects, the strange world, etc. It is all just wonderful. As for the comic's strengths, I think it's the art. The art for me is really what sells the dark fairy tale aspects and puts in that extra oomph of horror for each scene.

sssfrs (JOE IS DEAD)

I like the fox animal

That one is my favorite so far & its all very cool

I liked the pigeon picture with all the realistic pigeons

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 2

9. Is Hans Vogel actually dead? Regardless of yes or no, why do you think he is where he is? Additionally, if Hans is “dead”, is it possible for him to die again? If so, what do you think would happen to him at that point?

10. Over the course of the story, how do you think the events will change how Hans views his own life, his country, and the war he was fighting? Overall, what do you think the story has to say about war?

11. Do you think Reineke is just a fox, or is there something more to Reineke? Additionally, do you think being with Hans will help Reineke recover from previous mistreatment? If yes, how so? If not, why not?

12. How might Hans change the world of Märchenwald, especially given the war that is said to be going on in the world? Will this change be for the better, worse, or ultimately have no affect?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

RebelVampire

To answer the next set of questions then- I think Hans is "dead," but I also think the comic is asking us to reconsider what being "dead" is. And in this case, I think death is basically going to another world or a form of purgatory. I do believe the valkyrie implied Hans could die again, so perhaps he'd go to even different world. Maybe death is just this endless world traveling where each world is progressively worse in the comic's setting. Although I really do lean towards more this is purgatory. I think over the course of the story, I do kind of feel like Hans is going to come to think war is bad because it means lots of people die, many for no good reason and many who aren't even combatants. And I think overall he'll look back on his accomplishments with much more shame, not even just based on the side he was on, but just on the true horrors he did in the name of war. Basically, war sucks, people die, and while sometimes it's a necessity, war leaves scars that can't be healed. So I kind of think the entire world is composed of people who, like Hans, died. So while Reineke might be a fox in that world, perhaps Reineke was a human like Hans back on Earth - hence why Reineke is so insistent about the mix up. I do think Hans will help Reineke grow though, as I think Hans will just show decent kindness and respect that screams "hey sometimes you can trust people." I think Hans will stop whatever war has been going on in the world while overcoming his personal demons. And it will surely be a change for the better, though I don't think we're gonna get sparkles and rainbows.

sssfrs (JOE IS DEAD)

I think he's dead because it says so in the name

sierrabravo (Hans Vogel is Dead)

I'll admit, I love it when the "is he dead" question comes up...

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 3

13. What are you most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic?

14. Any final words of encouragement for the comic?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

RebelVampire

I'm most looking forward to finding out more about the war shenanigans that are going on in Märchenwald. Cause no only will I think this give the story some unique changes in focus, but itll be interesting to see how the parallels might affect Hans. My final words are just that this is a wonderful comic. As I said earlier, going in I didn't think this comic would be my cup of tea, but then it just pulled me in with the dark atmosphere, the mystery, the characters, and so forth.

sierrabravo (Hans Vogel is Dead)

I'm not sure when this ends/if there's going to be any other comments, but I wanted to thank everyone who left a comment in here and for the wonderful questions!

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Hans Vogel is Dead this week! Please also give a special thank you to Sierra Barnes for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Hans Vogel is Dead, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/hans-vogel-is-dead/list?title_no=62633

Sierra’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/sierrabravo

Sierra’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/chjorniy_voron?lang=en

[melananin]

4/30/27

lets get personal. 1: 6 of the songs you listen to most? Protection by movements, lets talk about your hair by have mercy, summer sickness by safe to say, how does it feel? By citizen, follow you by bring me the horizon, constant conversations by passion pit 2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? I would like to meet kaya scodelario. She's purty 3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17. I cannot do that rn 4: What do you think about most? How this works would react if I was gone 5: What does your latest text message from someone else say? "Tru" 6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on? Pjs 7: What’s your strangest talent? Make a clover shape with my tongue 8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence) Girls suck; boys suck 9: Ever had a poem or song written about you? Kinda 10: When is the last time you played the air guitar? Not too long ago actually 11: Do you have any strange phobias? I really don't like touching veins. I dunno if that's a phobia though 12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? Hair 13: What’s your religion? My parents would like me to say catholic 14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? Walking or looking at the sky 15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? Behind for sure 16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band? Movements 17: What was the last lie you told? I'm alright :) 18: Do you believe in karma? Depends 19: What does your URL mean? Unlimited reliable links 20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength? Weakness: I care. Strengths: I care. 21: Who is your celebrity crush? Kaya scods or Cole sprouse. I know basic. I'll update if I can think of another, I haven't watched so much tv recently kinda 22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping? No I am a child 23: How do you vent your anger? Rant. But if people get annoyed with me by talking to myself. 24: Do you have a collection of anything? I've had a rock collection and a snow globe collection. I don't think I collect anything right now 25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? Video chatting. Mostly depends with who but video is best. 26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become? I'm not so happy yet so I don't think so. Working for it. 27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love? I hate the sound of people eating. I like the sound or pebbles kinda under water crunchiness. 28: What’s your biggest “what if”? What if I'm not capable? 29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Dunno about ghosts. Aliens most likely. There has got to be something else out there. 30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm. The air :o 31: Smell the air. What do you smell? Vanilla Can't we just love each other