#sesame street clips have also been funny

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so i've been watching Muppet compilations-

[lesbian-choso]

Thanks for tagging me @swordfaery :3

Rules: shuffle your ‘on repeat’ playlist and post the first 10 tracks, then list 10 songs you really like, each by a different artist. then tag 10 people to do the same thing.

I know I don’t have to but don’t mind me I’m also going to be talking a bit about these songs

Ftp by MASTER BOOT RECORD -> I found this song by looking for music for my Faith: The Unholy Trilogy playlist, I don’t think I’ve come across synthesised heavy metal before so this was quite interesting. Their side project Keygen Church is also pretty good, if anything I’d recommend that over MASTER BOOT RECORD given their use of organ and sick ‘classical Baroque influence’.

White Noiz by Akira Yamaoka -> I recently was watching Gab Smolders’ playthrough of Silent Hill, so I decided to check out the franchise’s various soundtracks. It’s not my favourite song but I like the atmosphere.

Roygbiv by Boards of Canada -> I’ve been checking out IDM so obviously BoC were a staple to get into. I haven’t really connected with much of their music but this is one of the ones that I really like. I find it fascinating that the album is entirely instrumental save for some audio clips of old Sesame Street episodes sporadically scattered throughout. I’m not sure if there’s a reason why this song was titled Roygbiv, but I do think either way it fits with the aesthetic and atmosphere (as for those who don’t know Roygbiv is an acronym listing the colours of the rainbow: Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet).

Somebody Told Me by The Killers -> I just wanted to listen to all of Hot Fuss, but I do find it funny that I knew this song first from Måneskin’s cover of it.

Sonne by Rammstein -> Ah yes one of the songs I’ll put on while pacing for hours thinking about my blorbos and OCs. Certified vampire song.

Ladykillers by Lush -> towards the end of last year I was watching Gregg Araki’s filmography and checking out shoegaze bands which is how I got around to Lush. I wish i could look half as cool as Miki Berenyi does with bright red hair.

Little Girls by Oingo Boingo -> the JoJo brainrot is real so I decided to check out Oingo Boingo since they were referenced in the show, to be honest there’s no way I can describe their music other than it just being tasty. It’s great, I want to eat it. And it always feels very awkward having to explain how this (so far) is my favourite song by them and no it is not weird I prommy.

Halls of Illusions by Insane Clown Posse -> Nothing much to say, certified juggalo moment.

Theme of Laura by Akira Yamaoka -> once again Silent Hill brought me here, tho this is my favourite track so far from the soundtracks.

Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge -> I’m always on the look out for more goth music in whatever form it comes in, I’ll have to check the rest of their stuff out for more goth rock. That being said this probably just ended up on my ‘on repeat’ playlist due to it being on an OC’s playlists lol.

Now for the next 10 songs that I really like:

Tagging: @loverlesbian @sarenite @tigraine-mantear @femtopulsed @croissantcitysucks @deadrunin @mercymorncristabel @astridcookie @smarterthantheaverageloser @arofication (also no pressure if you don’t want to do this)

[solo1y]

My Favourite SNL Sketches

I thought I'd post about this because everyone says "SNL is terrible now" and "it was better ten years ago" but they have been saying this literally since 1986. I am old enough to rememember when everyone hated the cast you think are the best. Yes, you, foolish reader.

Anyway, here are some of my favourite SNL sketches. I hope you like them too.

Black Jeopardy (2016)

This was part of a series of Black Jeopardy sketches which was usually some light-hearted ribbing of the working-class African-American experience. This episode with Tom Hanks was the same, but he was playing a MAGA Republican "redneck".

Over the course of the sketch, the black people on the show slowly discover what Marx wrote about in 1848: that working class people have more in common with each other than they ever will with the people in charge. Except this time, it's funny.

White Like Me (1984)

In this sketch, Eddie Murphy "whites up" and discovers that being a white person in New York is like living in a different reality.

Meet Your Second Wife (2015)

In this gameshow, male contestants are confronted with their (future) second wives.

It was a little on the nose in my case but also very funny.

More Cowbell (2000)

For some reason, people outside the United States can't see this, but you're probably all familiar possibly the most famous SNL sketch in history. It's even got its own Wikipedia page.

What Up With That? (2009 - 2021)

This is a recurring sketch and they are all on YouTube, so I just picked this one at random. The central conceit is that a talk show host invites famous people on his show but they never get to say anything because everything devolves into a funk jam.

Also, Lyndsey Buckingham.

Papyrus (2017)

The story of one man's completely reasonable and understandable obsession. Everything he does in this clip is fair. The first time I saw this, I watched the whole thing again from beginning to end.

Recently, they made a rather lovely sequel called Papyrus 2.

First CityWide Change Bank (1988)

A rare on-screen appearance by Jim Downey, a writer on SNL for 30 years. This was the first sketch I ever saw on an episode of SNL, when they were being re-run on MTV Europe.

There's just something about the lines "usually on the same day" and "volume" that made me laugh. Here's Kevin Nealon in another one.

The Grouch (2019)

I used to think that putting "Joker Parody" in the title was overkill, but it's been a few years and people might not remember the trailer for the gritty, realistic take on The Joker that Todd Phillips made. See the original trailer here to get the joke. Also, it won't make any sense unless you've seen Sesame Street. Every frame has funny. And the soundtrack is amazing.

If they get David Harbour (or Lady Gaga I guess?) back on they might do one for The Joker 2.

That's enough for now, but I will post more when you least expect it.

[aion-rsa]

Steve from Blue’s Clues Reminds Us Why Children’s TV Matters

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

What makes a great children’s TV show? 

Is it the colorful aesthetic of the world on-screen? Is it the funny voices of the cartoons and the playful interactions they have with one another? It’s all that but it’s also more. Good children’s shows understand that young ones are intelligent enough to grapple with concepts like right and wrong, friendship, family, and what it means to be creative. Kids are far more shrewd than adults give them credit for, therefore making a program for an age group that we have been out of touch with for decades presents a myriad of challenges. 

Once in a while there is a show that understands all of the above and for kids who grew up in the late 1990s and early 2000s, there was nothing like Nick Jr.’s Blue’s Clues. Hosted by Steve Burns between 1996 and 2002, the program follows a rigid format in which the host and Blue (the canine namesake) help the audience figure out a puzzle presented at the onset of the episode with clues littered throughout the fictional world. Paw prints mark the objects that hint to what was trying to be figured out, and the tone is simultaneously lenient and encourages challenging thought-provocation that respects a child’s level of intellect and their desire to problem solve. 

Blue’s Clues wasn’t the first children’s show to attempt to merge what is happening on the screen with a prodding of viewer interaction; Sesame Street is the forever original in that category. Because the window of time the show ran in its first iteration was so short, the kids who watched it felt it belonged to them. Other similar outfits transcended many generations, but this one was inherently tied to Gen Z. 

When Burns left after six years, that version of fun was altered. The show continued with Donovan Patton playing Steve’s cousin, Joe, but his style didn’t connect with Steve’s generation nearly as much. Steve felt like a cool pseudo-parent, someone who we respected and listened to while knowing that we could turn him off after 30 minutes and take a break from any hindrance or concept that maybe hit a little too close to guardian-speak. 

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

What hurt was that Steve’s absence, while valid (he went off to college), confused the young audience and they were left to wonder whether we did something wrong. Now in their mid-20’s, the fans of the show got a major surprise answer earlier this week when Burns posted an update video on social media for the 25th anniversary of Blue’s Clues. 

So about that time Steve went off to college… #BluesClues25 pic.twitter.com/O8NOM2eRjy

— Nick Jr. (@nickjr) September 7, 2021

The brilliance of the clip is that Steve Burns is still in character as “Steve” and still speaking the way he did to us when we were kids, with his hallmark verbal traits like pausing after a statement to give time to respond and asking open-ended questions that make the person on the other end think and process. The topics being discussed are obviously much more mature though. He addresses how far we’ve all come in the last two decades and references jobs, school loans, and families. Twitter users appreciated his candor and awareness of us being grown-up, tying childhood to adulthood in a very raw and realistic manner. 

Wow we all needed this today pic.twitter.com/8ENN6TVH0F

— philip lewis (@Phil_Lewis_) September 7, 2021

And also Steve knows how hard it is … pic.twitter.com/O5EJJlx5mj

— 𝓐𝓹𝓪💬 (@trshafaa) September 8, 2021

That’s why Blue’s Clues was so special. It interacted with its audience knowing that the little tykes behind the glass are going to be adult men and women with a variety of joys and hardships in their futures. The show fully intended to form a lifelong relationship between the characters and the viewers, one that would endure and be remembered long after it had come to an end. 

It respected the mental capacity of the children watching as people who have fluid development tracks rather than concrete beings who are recycled as they age. No one group of kids is the same as the next one. It’s why the show is so niche and profound for this specific age group and was pushed into major viral territory by the zoomers with this acknowledgement from Steve. It should be noted that the show was rebooted as Blue’s Clues & You! in 2019, giving a chance for the current youth to experience the same feelings of fulfillment and joy as the previous ones.  

Original Blue’s Clues watchers are adults now but still have the ability to be transported right back to childhood in the blink of an eye. The innocence is gone, but we got to where we are because of shows like Blue’s Clues that prepared us to solve problems, make friends, and enjoy the nuances and humor in every situation. The human lifecycle is universal, but the further we get from childhood the more we unfortunately act as if we never had formative years. 

It was so heartwarming to see both Steve and the audience come together as one and recognize that this was a show that profoundly touched those involved, and we will still reminisce about it in another 20 years! 

The post Steve from Blue’s Clues Reminds Us Why Children’s TV Matters appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3zYc0YP

[transbutts]

I’m passively suicidal and don’t know what to do. I wanna transition again but I was forced off hormones and threatened with homelessness and I feel like something bad like that will happen to me again if I try to go back on it. I don’t want the rest of my family to hate/hurt me, but I can’t keep living my life pretending to be a woman when I’m not.

[TW: suicide/self harm mention][Disclaimer: I am not a doctor nor do I have the experience/credentials necessary to be one and everything below is just based off opinion and my own experiences]

Hello. First I just want to say I’m really glad you reached out to us. And secondly I’d like to say that I’m sorry all of that is happening I understand going through all of that must be extremely difficult… I know this sounds cheesy but just remember you aren’t alone. Even when it feels like you are you aren’t alone.

Something I can suggest to possibly help is contacting the Trevor Project. They have a crisis call line, a chat room type of deal, and even a texting number if you’d like to use that. The Trevor Project is an organization run to help youth (or anyone) who identifys anywhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum. They not only can help with issues regarding that, they also can help with family issues, school issues, anxiety, stress, anything really. They’re super great, and I have used them many times in the past (both texting and the chat) and they’ve been pretty amazing. The Trevor Project Website

Another thing that I use which REALLY helps to distract me and get my mind focused away from any bad thoughts is the app ”My Shiny Things” It’s a cute little app that when you open it it’ll ask how bad you want to hurt yourself on a scale of 1-10. After you choose your number video playlists pop up. These videos range anywhere from puppies playing, babies laughing, clips of Sesame Street, and many other cute/funny/simple videos. You can also add your own if you find a type of video or a channel or something that really helps to distract you and make you feel better (for instance through this app I’ve discovered that Cookie Monster from Sesame Street is a really big help at distracting me and making me laugh so I have a bunch of videos with him saved in the app for when I need them).

These are just some things that I use when I’m struggling with something like this so hopefully something here will really stick and help you too.

-Brett

[papermoonloveslucy]

BOB HOPE’S WORLD OF COMEDY

October 30, 1976

Produced and Directed by Jack Haley Jr.

Written by: Charles Lee with Gig Henry, Jeffrey Barron, Katherine Green, and Jack Haley Jr.

Bob Hope (Himself, Host) was born Lesley Townes Hope in England in 1903. During his extensive career in virtually all forms of media he received five honorary Academy Awards. In 1945 Desi Arnaz was the orchestra leader on Bob Hope’s radio show. Ball and Hope did four films together. He appeared as himself on the season 6 opener of “I Love Lucy.” He did a brief cameo in a 1964 episode of “The Lucy Show.”  When Lucille Ball moved to NBC in 1980, Hope appeared on her welcome special. He died in 2003 at age 100.

Lucille Ball (Herself) was born on August 6, 1911 in Jamestown, New York. She began her screen career in 1933 and was known in Hollywood as ‘Queen of the B’s’ due to her many appearances in ‘B’ movies. With Richard Denning, she starred in a radio program titled “My Favorite Husband” which eventually led to the creation of “I Love Lucy,” a television situation comedy in which she co-starred with her real-life husband, Latin bandleader Desi Arnaz. The program was phenomenally successful, allowing the couple to purchase what was once RKO Studios, re-naming it Desilu. When the show ended in 1960 (in an hour-long format known as “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour”) so did Lucy and Desi’s marriage. In 1962, hoping to keep Desilu financially solvent, Lucy returned to the sitcom format with “The Lucy Show,” which lasted six seasons. She followed that with a similar sitcom “Here’s Lucy” co-starring with her real-life children, Lucie and Desi Jr., as well as Gale Gordon, who had joined the cast of “The Lucy Show” during season two. Before her death in April 1989, Lucy made one more attempt at a sitcom with “Life With Lucy,” also with Gordon, which was not a success and was canceled after just 13 episodes.

Neil Simon (Himself) is a playwright and screenwriter responsible for more than 30 plays, most of which were seen on Broadway and adapted into films.  At the time, one of his most enduring plays The Odd Couple was being done on television. In 1983 became the only living playwright to have a New York theatre named in his honor. In 1960, when it was still called the Alvin Theatre, Lucille Ball appeared there in the musical Wildcat.

Don Rickles (Himself) worked as a stand-up comic in nightclubs for nearly 20 years before making his film debut in 1958. Rickles was known as an insult comic and became a staple of Hollywood roasts. In “Lucy the Fight Manager” (TLS S5;E20) he made his first and last acting appearance with Lucille Ball, but would be seen with her on variety shows and specials through 1988. Rickles was the voice of Mr. Potato Head in the animated Toy Story franchise. He died in April 2017 at age 90.

Norman Lear (Himself) is a television writer and producer responsible for such hits as “All in the Family,” “Maude,” “One Day at a Time,” “The Jeffersons,” and many others. He received three Emmy Awards for his work on “All in the Family.”  

Caroll Spinney (Big Bird) started playing Big Bird on “Sesame Street” in 1969. In 2000, Big Bird was named a Living Legend by the United States Library of Congress. Created by Jim Henson, Big Bird is one of two Muppets to have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Spinney has been honored with four Daytime Emmy Awards for his portrayals on the series and two Grammy Awards for his related recordings. Two recordings of Spinney's voice have earned Gold Record status.

As with many Bob Hope specials, the show is sponsored by Texaco.

Bob Hope's opening monologue talks mainly about the Presidential Election, which would take place in two weeks. Incumbent president Gerald Ford ran against Jimmy Carter. He also touches on the World Series, the Swine Flu epidemic, Zsa Zsa Gabor's multiple marriages, and the CB radio craze.

Bob's first guest is Big Bird from “Sesame Street” (Caroll Spinney). Big Bird does an ad-lib impersonation of Jack Benny that makes Hope laugh. This kicks off a montage of clips about animals.

A pet shop staffed by Bob Newhart 

Jackie Gleason playing golf with Mildred, a chimp in How To Commit Marriage (1969)

Roy Rogers and Trigger “the wonder horse”

Julie London with puppies who prove not to be housebroken

Dan Rowan with a horse and Dick Martin with a camel 

Hope with his dog in a vet's waiting room and Betty Grable there with a race horse

Hope and Greer Garson in divorce court fighting over their dog, Mr. Smith

Lassie as the subject of “This is Your Life” in a spoof from “The Bob Hope Show”

Next Hope introduces a montage of clips featuring international stars.  

Maurice Chevalier (France)

Eva Gabor (Hungary)

Zsa Zsa Gabor (Hungary) with Angie Dickinson

Ingrid Bergman (Sweden)

Anita Ekberg (Sweden) with William Holden and Robert Strauss

Olivia Newton John (Australia)

Rex Harrison (England) and Lilli Palmer (Poland) with Janis Paige

David Niven (England) with Marilyn Maxwell

After a Texaco commercial, Bob introduces Lucy Ricardo aka Lucy Carmichael aka “the bionic woman of comedy” - Lucille Ball. 

Lucy reminisces with Bob, which leads to a black and white clip of a sketch from “The Bob Hope Show” (September 24, 1962). In it, Lucy plays a District Attorney and Bob a gangster named Bugsy Hope.

Back on stage, Bob asks Lucy the secret to her show's endearing success. She says that it has to do with the realatable domestic situations created by the writers. Bob add that the physical comedy gives her comedy world-wide appeal. Lucy says that as of last count her shows were seen in 79 countries. Lucy says she's heard herself dubbed in Japanese, and that in South America it is HER who as the accent. Asked about being a legend, Lucy says it is “kind of like an obituary” but she's very grateful.

After another Texaco break, Bob talks about slapstick and introduces a montage of clips.

Ernie Kovacs trying to sell his house during an earthquake

Bob as Bobby Riggs playing against Billie Jean King (Ann-Margret)

Hope and Douglas Fairbanks Jr. as astronauts walking in space

Jack Benny using hidden cameras in his home to avoid paying Hope a guest-star fee

The second hour of the special kicks off with Hope introducing playwright Neil Simon. They talk about writing, the difference between drama and comedy, and ethnic humor, which is the cue for the next montage of clips about vaudeville.

Hope and Crosby do a routine

Hope, Crosby, Steve Allen, and Jack Paar are child actors competing for the same job

Danny Thomas as a candy seller interrupting Hope's act by stealing all his punchlines

Donald O'Connor as Wingo the Magnificent, a knife thrower, with Hope as Courageous Targo, his human target

Hope introduces Don Rickles, who promotes his new show “CPO Sharkey” which he compares to Phil Silvers in “Sergeant Bilko.”  Hope says he's been the victim of insult comedy, which begins a montage of clips where Bob is insulted by:

Milton Berle

Tony Randall

Redd Foxx

Glenn Campbell

Gina Lollobridgida

Jerry Colonna

Dorothy Lamour

Tony Bennett

Fred MacMurray

Joan Crawford

George Sanders

Frank Sinatra

Troy Donahue

Hedda Hopper

John Wayne

Dyan Cannon

Debbie Reynolds (with Jack Benny)

Juliet Prowse

Bob Hope introduces Norman Lear, who mentions he has no shows on NBC. They talk about “Mary Hartman Mary Hartman,” the 'Family Hour,' his flops like “Hot L Baltimore,” and Archie Bunker. The next batch of clips is about satire.  

Johnny Carson as a playboy movie star Rock Carson appearing on a talk show 

Hope, Burt Reynolds and Dyan Canon spoof the TV series “Paper Moon”  

A sketch called “Bananaz” (“Bonanza”) starring Bing Crosby, Bob Hope, and Juliet Prowse

A “Batman” spoof starring Martha Rae as Bat Girl and Bob Hope as the villain Lobsterman

Medical dramas are poked fun at by Hope, Barbara Eden, and Lee Marvin

After a commercial, the montages are about dancing. Some of Hope's choreographed clips: 

Dancing with Raquel Welch

Doing Eddie Foy's famous sand dance

Soft shoe with Pearl Bailey

A trio with Jeanne Crain and Betty Hutton

A challenge dance with George Burns

Rare footage of Dean Martin dancing alongside Hope

Polly Bergen, Jimmy Durante and Hope dance as babies while on their knees (above photo)

A partner dance with Ginger Rogers

Hoofing with Hope and Jimmy Cagney

Modern dance with Ann-Margret

Hat and cane steps with Sammy Davis Jr.

Hope wraps up the special with a look at some of the comedians of the past.  

Budd Abbott and Lou Costello (above photo)

Fred Allen

Gracie Allen

Cliff Arquette aka Charlie Weaver

Mischa Auer

Robert Benchley

Jack Benny

Willy Best

Fanny Brice, the original 'Funny Girl'

Joe E. Brown

Billy Burke

Eddie Cantor

Jack Carson

Charles Correll, Amos of “Amos 'n' Andy”

Wally Cox

Joan Davis

Marie Dressler

Leon Errol

W.C. Fields

Billy Gilbert, the greatest sneeze in show business

Ted Healy and the Three Stooges

Hugh Herbert

Judy Holliday

Edward Everett Horton

Buster Keaton

Edgar 'Slow Burn' Kennedy

Ernie Kovacs

Burt Lahr

Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy

Harold Lloyd

Carol Lombard

Harpo and Chico Marx

Donald Meek

Victor Moore

Jack Norton, the perennial drunk

Franklin Pangborn

Joe Penner

Will Rodgers

Irene Ryan, Granny of “The Beverly Hillbillies”

Charlie Ruggles

S.Z. 'Cuddles' Sakall

Max Sennett, king of the Keystone Cops

Arthur Treacher

Burt Wheeler and Robert Wolsey

Ed Wynn

This Day in Lucy History – October 29th

“The Diet” (ILL S1;E3) – October 29, 1951

"Visitor from Italy" (ILL S6;E5) – October 29, 1956

"Lucy Buys a Sheep" (TLS S1;E5) – October 29, 1961

"Lucy and Andy Griffith" (HL S6;E8) – October 29, 1973

[martywurst]

11/30/17

4 years 4 months later…

I drove home on the 405, singing to The Beach Boys "Barbara Ann" like an asshole, alternating on the harmonies. I’ve been singing along to this song since I graduated from Maui High School (Class of '98 brah!) and I always get swept up in the happiest of memories. The Beach Boys are laughing while they’re singing, totally unprofessional. Musicians trying to be funny...when will they ever learn? There's a time and place- when you're in the studio performing, you BE PROFESSIONAL!

So what do you guys think I should write about?

I’m happy now because I hit two mics and I had fun at both of them. I feel good about what I’m doing. I occasionally THINK that and then some miserable mic sets me back a thousand years and I don’t know shit all over again. Wait, I think I just figured this- SMACK! I’m starting to get comedy now-WOMP! Last year I didn’t know dick, this year, I finally found my voi-BLOPFUK!

I’m becoming more and more relaxed, putting hundreds of hours of bombing in. Keeping my expectations low, trying to have fun and BE GOOFIER. Trust myself to be more spontaneous and not just saying the words that are over-rehearsed, trying to find new words to paint the picture. Then occasionally phoning it in, but acknowledging it, like when you stray away from meditation with distracting thoughts. Now Marty, take a deep breath and just get back on track when you can...you dildo. You can look up that classic Sesame Street clip AFTER you’ve finished your meditation. You can try to tell your joke in a fresh way at the next mic. Now visualize your dick jokes slapping across the street like a game of Frogger…

Sometimes I’m so desperate for approval of a new bit I’ll ask Claire to watch me. It’s usually pretty painful, but she’s a good gauge of what’s godawful or she’ll see the potential in a bit and try to contribute. Then I’ll shut her down real quick because who’s the comedian here, right? I really think she believes in me (because she told me she believes in me, in those words) but sometimes I just want another comic to say "Hey good joke!" preferably someone with a Laughs on Fox credit.

Years have gone by and someone I’ve admired all this time is on the same show and we finally exchange pleasantries. No ego, just hey- we were on the same show! You’re pretty great. Love what you’re doing. Now you say it back to me. SAY IT BACK MOTHERFUCKER, I JUST SUPPORTED YOUUUUUU (falls into abyss, tongues of drunken audience members wagging and stabbing my mid-section)

I see those late night, sentimental “I love comedy” posts on Facebook every once in awhile and I can feel the cynical cesspool of backlash forming a giant tidal wave, but I totally get it. I had a night like that tonight. I have nights like this at many open mics. It’s friends, it’s the few people that are suddenly looking up at me, who were buried in their laptops a minute ago. It’s a hug from a comic that I love, or some rapid-fire joking going on outside in a semicircle of idiots. Being around funny people. Standing alone at an open mic that I’m dreading and suddenly finding that one person- a friend. They have my back with the perfect line that triggers a bark of laugh out of me, because it’s also relief. It’s gonna be okay because I can still hang with this fantastic funny person.

I got paid for some impossible bar show. I wasn’t told in advance and when I finished my mostly silent set I got a handful of bills. Mostly pesos and a farthing, but it’s amazing to get paid when you’re not expecting it. Now if only I could win some tickets to a Flappers show! (get yer jabs in ya cynical fuck, don’t get too sentimental Feelie Dan!) One comic offered me his hotel room for the night because he wasn't going to use it. Almost made me cry- the room was a shithole!

I think our cat is out of the woods. Tune is napping in front of the heater, thanks for asking. Claire is gently snoring in the bedroom, I assume. She doesn’t snore loud enough to penetrate two doors. Now the cat is lapping water from a jar- one of my favorite sounds in the world. Oh yeah, the Patreon thing is kind of funny. I have 6 subscribers, but I’m enjoying making the videos- kind of a video journal of some open mics I’ve been visiting for the first time. A video review of the mic and some random interviews, testimonials, etc. If you can’t get enough of the open mic bullshit and you’re curious it’s $2 a month to join.

My Patreon

We can’t end this journal entry on a plug though, that’s pathetic.

It’s nice to have a new family of friends in this strange world, but then I remember my friends from acting school or the people I knew through the Geffen or Arclight. Years are going by. Marriages, break-ups, babies, health scares and the occasional tragedy that affects us all. I’ll hear a song or see a clip from some project that brings those people swirling back in my head- oh yeah, there are other people you love too. Maybe I should give them a call. See one of their shows. Stop by for a visit. Finally introduce myself to their ten-year old baby.

I get asked,

“How’s the comedy going?

I usually ramble for a few minutes about the intense highs and lows, desperately trying to make sense of it all and it all sounds absurd saying it out loud, like I’m lying to their face!

You gotta bomb? You gotta do shit mics? You gotta write? Network? But what about the comedy special?

I always manage to squeeze in that one overly sincere declaration of,

I’m in this for the win.

I mean it. Sure I’ve FLIRTED with quitting in my head, but it’s because I’ve been on vacation and it can feel especially troubling going back to a mic after a week of no stage time. It rarely happens and when it does I feel sad. Yet it gets harder to go back for some reason. I never seriously considered quitting. I made a feature film in 2007 because I told myself I could do it. I never said My movie will get distribution. It kind of fizzled out after the completion thing.

But I can do this. I am a comedian. I do other stuff, but if you’re interested we can always talk about it.

Don’t forget the patreon thing. Come see a show- check my dates at Martywurst.com. I have Dvds of my short films, ask me and I’ll give you one. TheWurstTweet on Twitter. Search me on your podcast app. Find me on YouTube. Open Mic Reviews on Instagram or Marty Wurst for my regular pinups. I have old movie reviews on FirstShowing.net. My website has a Steve Buscemi voicemail. I’m in a shitty movie called Death Valley: The Revenge of Bloody Bill. I sang to Jennifer Connelly at a press junket for Blood Diamond. My Google search is pretty great. I made a movie called Salivate- you can’t find it anywhere. I have two audiobooks on Audible- Dark Sanity and Zombies in Love.

Oh and here's that Sesame Street clip.

[lolbtsaus]

First Day of School (Taehyung)

And now it is time for the second half of the Daegu line, the second half of Vmin, the love of my life who is shining so hard with this comeback and it’s making me so happy, he’s the center during the chorus for Not Today, he’s got lines in both of the songs, his whole headband look is some good shiT, I loved this comeback, Kim Taehyung aka V aka tae tae

All of the father related posts are here

For everyone that hasn’t read the original father!Taehyung post, he has four bbys, in order of age it’s his son, twin daughters and then another son

To avoid repetition and so this post doesn’t get too long, I will be lumping some of the things together since they’d be pretty similar anyways, like dropping them off at school, spending mornings together etc.

The bby Kims (aka the ducklings or bby bears) all look like teeny tiny Taes, bby #4 looks the most like him but they all have the same square smile, the bright eyes, the super kissable cheeks and they’re so bubbly and cuddly and cu te

They’re all su p e r excited for school bc they’re social lil bubs and they love the idea of going to school and learning and making new friends and just having lots of fun

But then they realize Tae doesn’t get to come and that’s just not fun at all, they’re s o attached to him he’s the person they run to whenever they’re excited, scared, sad, mad, happy, tired any emotions whatsoever, he’s their “bestest friend in the entire world”

They don’t even like it when he goes to the store without at least offering to take them, they have zero clue how they’re supposed to handle a school day without him there

Bby #3 gets especially upset bc she’s always been glued to his side and  she’s just a total daddy’s girl who doesn’t like being apart from him bc she loves him so so much and she loves sitting with him and cuddling and she’s always the first to wake him up and the last to say goodnight

Thankfully she has her twin to help her out so she’s not alone, plus bby boy #1 will be in a classroom not too far from hers so she can run to him for a hug as well

All of them take a second to get excited again and it only happens when Tae promises that it really isn’t as bad as it sounds, it’s just like when he has to go to a concert or they go to a friend’s house

Mornings with the Kim are always really sweet

All of the bbys l o v e their cuddles and it’s the first thing they do in the morning, they climb into your bed and just make themselves comfy, even though sometimes you and tae wake up to hands in your face, feet digging into your side and an elbow too close to your eye for comfort

Tae’s definitely accidentally elbowed himself with one of their elbows bc he won’t even have his eyes open yet and he goes to get into a comfier position bc something (bby #2′s hand) is squished against his cheek and he ends up bumping into bby #1′s elbow and nearly gives himself a black eye

He always finds the angles they get into so funny bc one of them’s face down on the back and their head is nearly hanging off the bed and he doesn’t understand how that can be comfy but they’re content so whatever works

They all pile onto him to give him his morning hugs and kisses and then they do the same for you bc everyone needs their kiss and if somehow, someone gets left out accidentally, they’re gonna be really really sad and pouty

They all wanna be carried down the stairs so you and Tae have to carry two each bc no one wants to be left plus leaving a bby alone downstairs/upstairs is not the best idea

Everyone loves helping with breakfast but having six people plus a dog in one kitchen is not the easiest way to cook something, especially when four of those people are trying to hug your legs so television is a great way to keep them entertained

Tae sits them at the table and sets up his laptop so that it plays Between the Lions bc that’s their favorite show ever to exist and then you and him make breakfast together and it’s a good opportunity to fully wake up, maybe drink some coffee or some tea

They all wanna help make it but you and Tae come up with the idea that they help make dinner instead, that way everyone’s wide awake, no one’s got a totally empty stomach and there’s more time to make it

On the first day, they’re all s o excited and they’re bouncing in their seats and squealing and they keep talking to the both of you and not really paying attention to the show bc they’re too excited to sit still and focus on one thing

Tae’s getting hyped up too bc they’re !! which makes them even more hyped up which just gets him more pumped and it’s an endless cycle until someone’s screaming out of excitement

Their first outfits are su pe r cute bc they have similar styles but then each one has their own twist, they all get to pick their own outfits of course but if they want help, Tae’s more than happy to give them some ideas

Bby boy #1′s first outfit is a gray shirt with a pineapple on it with some black comfy pants, they’re not too baggy but they’re not tight bc all of the Kim bbys love to run and play so they can’t have anything too restricting, he also has on some black and white sneakers and a black jacket and a necklace with “Kim” on it

Tae combs his hair back and makes sure his bangs aren’t gonna be getting into his eyes or anything like that and he combs everything out so his hair isn’t tangled and messy from being asleep

Bby #2′s first outfit is a long white shirt with lil frills at the bottom and a and some black leggings and some black flats with a white flower on it and her coat is more beige and then the “Kim” necklace bc all of the bbys have it

She wants her hair to be in a half up half down type of style so Tae gives her what she wants and ties half of her hair up and it looks really adorable

Bby #3′s first outfit is a white dress with a purple floral pattern, some black tights underneath it and her jacket of choice is a black hoodie bc it’s comfy and warm and she wears black flats and of course the necklace

She wants a ponytail so Tae braids her bangs back so they for sure won’t fall out of the ponytail and ties it all back for her and she also get a flower clip in her hair

Bby #4′s first outfit is an Dinosaur Train t-shirt with some black jeans and his coat is also beige and it matches bby #2′s, his shoes are sneakers and he’s of course rocking the necklace

He gets a beanie bc he just likes beanies they’re warm and comfy and soft and it keeps his hair out of his face

Bby #1 has a Phineas and Ferb lunchbox and a Spongebob backpack, bby #2 has a Scooby Doo lunchbox and a Rugrats backpack, bby #3 has a Powerpuff Girls backpack and a Sesame Street lunchbox, bby #4 has a Batman backpack and a Curious George lunchbox

Tae is so torn about what to feel about their first day bc he’s so beyond proud and happy that they’re finally starting their school lives and that they’re gonna learn so much and make so  many friends but then there’s also the side of him that just wants to turn the car around and drive back home and wait another year bc he just wants to cuddle his bbys they don’t gotta grow up yet they can stay small

He’s gotta hold back some tears on the drive but once he sees their classroom, they’re gathering up in his eyes and he’s gotta blink them back bc the bbys don’t like it when he cries and he knows they’ll get upset and start crying if he cries and he doesn’t wanna ruin their day for them

He gives them h u g e hugs that last for a few minutes and with the twins, he hugs them individually and then all together and he’s definitely stalling big time bc he keeps asking them if they have things he knows they do like their lunchboxes, their jackets, their necklaces

They can tell something’s wrong and Tae can see their eyes start to get teary bc they know he’s upset and he isn’t fooling them at all so he has to quickly cheer them up by tickling them and giving them lots of kisses bc if they cry, he’s sure as hell gonna start bawling he can’t help it

“I’ll miss you but you’re gonna have so much fun!!”

“I’m gonna miss you too daddy!! But we’ll see each other soon, right?? It’s only a few hours! Like a really long movie”

“That’s right bub, it’s just a long movie”

Hearing their giggles and seeing their eyes light up when they see the cousins (the boys’ kids) makes him feel so much better and he gives them one last hug before walking them into their class

“We did good Tae, they’ll do fine”

“Do you think they’ll forget about me”

“Pretty sure spending every day of their lives with them is gonna outweigh a few hours of being apart so no, they’re not gonna forget you”

“Let’s have another”

“Oh my g o d” 

[talhaghafoor2019-blog]

GOOD MUSIC IS GOOD MUSIC

ROCKER GONE SOFT?

I mean, LA Opera’s “Hansel & Gretel” for pete’s sake, the children’s tale, now a holiday staple? And all that other classical stuff?

Well, “H&G“ rocks, baby. The first opera based entirely on a fairy tale, German composer Engelbert Humperdinck picked a Grimm one, and the brothers were indeed grim, I learned at the pre-concert lecture from LA Opera conductor James Conlon. Two of nine Grimm children (three died in childhood), they knew quite well the pain of hunger, and that is an important opening and backdrop to this story. And at the LA Opera community outreach lecture that afternoon at our main library here, I learned and saw how different the H&G interpretations can be.

You can have a really ugly witch (like in the film we saw), or one like this production’s Susan Graham who brought great comedic skills with her superb voice. (All the singers were outstanding, especially H & G and their father, there are only five, plus two minor parts).

The sets and the forest characters were magical, and I was completely entertained, in an adult way. You shouldn’t miss this one. See below.

Also at our main library last week, I caught another performance of their outstanding, always provocative and high quality Soundwaves concert series, which, as usual, was a shorter preview of a later performance at Disney Hall’s Zipper Hall, next Tuesday (not free). Outstanding pianist Gloria Cheng presented “Garlands for Steven Stucky,” the LA Phil’s composer in residence for decades who was greatly skilled and loved as a mentor.

And Sunday morning I was treated to a marvelous Ted talk-like program upstairs at the Laemmle Theatre downtown, mixing data mining with music interpretation by a marvelous string quartet, in a most intriguing way. What a great town.

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED:

LA OPERA: Hansel & Gretel (Engelbert Humperdinck ain’t no Puccini, Verdi or Strauss but H&G is considered his greatest work and Strauss dug him so much he conducted the premier, a smashing success, and he also ain’t the schmaltzy crooner who stole his name in the ‘60s, but don’t get too distracted from the superb Wagnerian score by the 12-foot magical characters on stage, the fantastical sets and special effects of this production and it’s also got laughs, see above), Sun 2 p.m., Dorothy Chandler Pavilion, downtown LA, $16-$294.

RECOMMENDED:

TONIGHT! – LA PHILHARMONIC: Stanley Kubrick’s Sound Odyssey (Kubrick loved him some classical music scores for his films, Beethoven to Bartok, Ligeti to Penderecki, can’t imagine “2001” or “A Clockwork Orange” without those signatures, you will see a string of clips from his great ones, hosted by none other than “Clockwork’s” Alex, Malcolm McDowell, and hear the music live and fabulous from the LA Phil, seems like a good night’s entertainment), Thurs, Fri 8 p.m., Sun 2 p.m., Walt Disney Concert Hall, downtown LA, $20-$204.

TONIGHT! – PATTI LABELLE (would I send you all the way out to Temecula, yes I would to see the great Patti Labelle, sometimes not included in the pantheon of the greatest soul voices ever but she most definitely is, put her on your bucket list, you may not have seen her blow minds in the ‘70s on tour with her outrageous trio LaBelle, I did, straight from the New York Continental baths scene, glammed up in what I dubbed the Crustaceans from Outer Space silver outfits, it’s when I learned there were gay people in Albuquerque, what a party that was, you may not have seen her take the stage in LA as the Tina Turner “replacement” Acid Queen in the one-off all-star “Tommy,” I did, no one missed Tina I’ll tell ya, but you can always see my other sweetest performance by her, you know how people say so-and-so could sing the phone book, or the alphabet and it would be fabulous, well she did sing the ABCs song gospel-style on Sesame Street 2/19/99, 11+M views, and you should watch, I did, I do, pretty often, good for the soul, but call Pechanga if you really want to go because it may be sold out but it is her only show in the area, so, bucket list), 7 p.m., Pechanga Resort & Casino, Temecula, $69 up.

JACK SHELDON (great trumpeter-singer-actor who was part of the ‘50s West Coast jazz scene and has been performing ever since in so many fields, this is his birthday party for himself, turning 87, famous voices singing in “Schoolhouse Rock” including “I’m Just a Bill” and the guy who explained the electoral college — I think he needs a re-do now explaining how we can get rid of it — and if you see him live you will not only catch a legend with the best sidemen but you will wonder if he missed his calling at stand-up, he is sooo bawdy funny), Fri, Sat 8:30 p.m., Catalina Bar & Grill, Hollywood, $25-$30.

I SEE HAWKS IN LA, MEAT PUPPETS (two great bands with very different styles and right, another long journey for great music I’m sending you on, the Hawks do play locally somewhat regularly but not Phoenix’s legendary Meat Puppets so maybe you’re coming back from Thanksgiving anyway past Joshua Tree, do yourself a favor and dew drop inn), Sat 9 p.m., Pappy & Harriet’s Pioneertown Palace, Joshua Tree, $25.

GLORIA CHENG, “Garlands for Steven Stucky” (see above), Tues 8 p.m., the Colburn School of Music, Zipper Concert Hall.

THE SKATALITES (they’re still around? didn’t they invent ska in the mid-’60s? maybe, named it anyway, were really active only 1964-’65 but so influential, worked with all the best Jamaican producers and players, the 10 founders were a who’s who of JA music, Jackie Mitoo, Don Drummond, Tommy McCook, Rolando Alphonso et al, started playing together in ‘55, all gone now save Lester Sterling and Doreen Shaffer, reformed and touring the last 35 years so I believe you will get the real deal), Wed 9 p.m., the Echoplex, Echo Park, $20.

HOUSE OF VIBE ALL STARS (ordinarily I never recommend something I haven’t seen but the boys at Harvelle’s, with the perfect resume for taking over this nearly 90-year-old blues club in downtown Santa Monica from longtime mogul Seven, keep telling me this is a great show I must see so I am recommending it based on great sources and promise to go so I can give a personal assessment, meanwhile if you go and you hate it I will personally give you your 5 bucks back), Wed 9 p.m., Harvelle’s, Santa Monica, $5.

ELVIS COSTELLO (Elvis Costello!), next Thurs, 7 p.m., the Wiltern, Mid-Wilshire, $125-$240 (too much! but it’s your money).

A LYRIC SO GOOD I WISH I HAD THOUGHT OF IT: “I’d rather go blind, boy, than to see you walk away from me.”

— (Etta James, Ellington Jordan, Billy Foster  1967)

Sung with such palpable, heart-wrenching emotion by the late great Etta James, it became an instant blues classic, covered by Beyonce (playing her in “Cadillac Ranch”), Clarence Carter (blind from birth), Koko Taylor, Little Milton, B.B. King and currently on the airwaves — remember airwaves? — a very credible version by Grace Potter.

But what an image. For a sighted person, is there a much bleaker future than to suddenly go blind? Think of it. I think about it, probably you have too, at least once. Your whole world would change. A pitch black world filled achingly with color memories, fading each day a little more. What worse could happen? And yet, the love-struck singer tells us, I’d choose it, rather than have eyes to witness the unbearable sight of you walking away from me. Has that ever been portrayed more powerfully, 13 words, in written word anywhere?

Charles Andrews has listened to a lot of music of all kinds, including more than 2,000 live shows. He has lived in Santa Monica for 32 years and wouldn’t live anywhere else in the world. Really. Send love and/or rebuke to him at  therealmrmusic@gmail.com

[flauntpage]

Roger Clemens, Suzy Waldman, And The Freakout Heard 'Round The World

If you listened, then you have heard it. If you played it with the sound off, the words are probably seared smoking into the wall behind you in looping New York Yankees cursive. But, for the record, after Roger Clemens' brief and dorky 2007 speech announcing his return to the team,radio color commentator Suzy Waldman cannonballs into the moment and explains what has just happened.

"Roger Clemens is in George's box, and Roger Clemens is coming back! Oh my good"—and there's a pause, here, as Waldman covers her microphone and says something to the production staff, or perhaps to play-by-play partner John Sterling. Then she is back, throaty and ecstatic and, to be honest, about three quarters of a mile over the top. " Oh my goodness gracious! Of all the dramatic things, of all the dramatic things I've ever seen, Roger Clemens standing right in George Steinbrenner's box, announcing he is back. Roger Clemens is a New York Yankee. And there we go, John … Now we don't need to discuss who takes that spot in the rotation."

Was it a bit much? It was, if we are being honest, a bit much. History has not been especially kind to Waldman's hyperbole—of all the dramatic things she'd ever seen would have been difficult to support even if Clemens had made a brilliant and moving speech and the dugout and stadium had erupted in tearful gratitude. None of that quite came through, and then Clemens went 6-6 with a 4.15 ERA in 18 starts for a Yankees team that wound up getting bounced from the playoffs in the Wild Card round*; the Boston Red Sox, who were outworked and outbid in their free agent run at Clemens, cruised through the postseason and dispatched the Colorado Rockies in the World Series. But if history was unkind to Waldman's performance, her peers in radio were significantly more so.

The audio of Waldman floridly losing her shit at the stadium that day became a sort of proto-meme, a shared joke grounded both in Waldman's deliriously and undeniably over-the-top performance and some other, uglier elements. In the days after Waldman briefly left her body live on the radio, Mike Francesa and Chris "Mad Dog" Russo played the clip over and over again on their WFAN show; shows like Opie And Anthony put it in similarly heavy rotation, not just in the days immediately afterwards but for years, less for any pressing sports-related reason than because it is so luridly, lividly ridiculous.

Or, anyway, that was part of it. In one representative bit, Opie and Anthony and co-host Jim Norton try to figure out who or what or who Waldman sounds like in the heat of her Oh My Goodness Gracious moment, running through Pee Wee Herman, Louis Armstrong, a gutshot Tim Roth in Reservoir Dogs, Homer Simpson drinking buddy Barney Gumble, and Sesame Street's Grover. "You should be fired," Norton says, "when you're a woman and you sound like Bobcat Goldthwait." The Opie And Anthony riffs on Waldman are funny, but they are also astringent and gendered and sometimes cruel. Francesa and Russo are slower-moving and more riff-averse creatures, and their mockery would naturally be both less funny and less profane. But all of it existed on a strange continuum. The clip of Waldman's rhapsody is absurd and hilarious on its own bellowing merits; there are many funny responses to it. But there are also some less funny and more obviously outwardly sexist ones, and all of these responses are adjacent to one another. The laughter that Waldman's performance naturally evokes did not necessarily come from the same place or run in the same direction, although it did all end up in the same place.

"Well-embedded Yankee moles tell me that deviants, who get their kicks harassing women, have come out of the woodwork and landed on Waldman," Bob Raissman wrote in the New York Daily News, nearly a month after Waldman's on-air rhapsody. "These creeps are fueled each and every time they hear some sports talkie play the tape of Waldman going gaga over Clemens' arrival. Playing this tape has become the macho thing to do." Raissman reported that Waldman was receiving crank calls and "perverted emails," and had taken to checking into hotels under an assumed name.

Waldman was not any happier with this than you would be, and confronted Russo when she ran into him outside the radio box at Shea Stadium. "Russo, according to well-embedded moles, tried defusing the situation by telling Waldman, "We were just having some fun," Raissman reported. "Waldman wasn't buying Russo's damage control/jive. She said she hoped he had 'his two days of fun,' but had 'ruined her life' in the process." Raissman reports that when Russo followed Waldman and attempted to cool her down, she "dropped two fat F bombs on Russo before accusing him of 'talking behind my back' for '20 years.'"

Waldman interviews A-Rod, in another dramatic moment. Photo by Brad Penner-USA TODAY Sports

"I was very, very good," Waldman told the New York Times about her musical theater career, back in 1993. "I just wasn't an original, you know? People would say I had the heart of Judy Garland and I belted like Streisand and I had the range of Barbara Cook. But these people already exist." Waldman had a long and distinguished career on Broadway, and starred in Broadway revivals of No, No, Nanette and Man Of La Mancha, but realized in her thirties that her future lay elsewhere. "I stopped being cute and perky and 21," she told the Times in that 1993 story. "I look pretty good for 46, but I can't dance anymore with the 21-year-olds." She found her way into radio, and then sports radio; when WFAN launched in 1987, Waldman's was the first voice listeners heard.

"It was very different back then," Waldman told Adweek about her early days in sports radio. "I can't even go back in that timeframe because it was so confrontational. I'd get used condoms in the mail and death threats. Horrible things happened in those first few years." Denied the assignments she wanted, Waldman went ahead and made up her own, carving out beats covering the Knicks and the Yankees.

When Waldman was on the Yankees beat for WFAN in the station's early days, Steinbrenner refused to talk to her; she was not invited to the annual lunch that the team held for beat writers at Manhattan's 21 Club. "Waldman sent an overnight letter to Steinbrenner at his office in Tampa," John Solomon wrote in Sports Illustrated in 1997. "She pointed out that more people heard her daily reports on the highly rated Mike and the Mad Dog show than read the local sports pages, and she included a breakdown of the advertising rates the station received for her spots. 'I'm coming down to Tampa next Wednesday, and I expect an interview,' the missive concluded."

Steinbrenner gave Waldman the interview, against what he considered to be his better judgment. "I like my women to spend my money and look real pretty," Waldman recalled Steinbrenner saying to her. "I don't like them to be pilots, policemen or sports reporters." During her years covering the team, Waldman's relationship with Steinbrenner was as good as any relationship with Steinbrenner could be, which is to say that it whipsawed between sentimental largesse and wild roaring cruelty depending entirely upon the moods of one of the moodiest manchildren in sports history.

Steinbrenner bullied Waldman to tears, then receded to more acceptable levels of boorishness days later. In the peculiar ways in which Steinbrenner was loyal, though, he was loyal to Waldman, and if she was never quite safe from the blasting unmanned firehose of Steinbrenner's personal cruelty and sexism, he worked to protect her from the cruelty and sexism of others; when she received death threats from Yankee fans in 1989, Steinbrenner hired Waldman a plainclothes security detail. In 2012, Waldman told Adweek that Steinbrenner was "as important a human being in my life as anybody, except my family." The Yankees hired her as the color commentator for the team's WCBS radio broadcasts in 2005.

Waldman also admired the star in Steinbrenner's luxury box that mildly dramatic day in 2007. Waldman had been friends with Clemens for many years, before she began her radio career and when Clemens' Major League career was just beginning. "They shared an interest in baseball and soap operas," Raissman wrote in the Daily News, in 2012. "For Waldman, Clemens was always a stand-up guy. She liked his family and loved his mother." Given that Clemens had been accused by former teammate Jason Grimsley of using PEDs at the end of the 2006 season, and given his longstanding reputation as a high-handed redass, Waldman's affection for Clemens was not widely shared around the game. This did not make her any less inclined to stand up for her friend.

When Clemens was named in the Mitchell Report after the 2007 season, Waldman said she did not know whether he had or hadn't taken PEDs, but she vigorously defended him as a man, and a friend. "I can only judge people on what I observe and how they treat me," she told Newsday's Neil Best. "And since the mid-'80s, I've known him and all of his family and watched the kids being born and knew his mother and know his sisters … I never saw this stuff. I don't know if it's true. Does it change what I think of Roger Clemens? I don't think so." When a jury acquitted Clemens of six felony charges of lying to Congress in 2012, Waldman did not hide her happiness at the result, or her disdain for peers who continued to believe that Clemens was guilty as charged. "Waldman had some choice words about commentators with that particular opinion," Raissman wrote. "The only ones fit to print in a family newspaper are 'self-important.'"

The Yankees radio broadcast team is, in a way that is not always charming, a throwback to the ramshackle monomania of George Steinbrenner's years, when the Yankees were defined by both their swinging-dick grandiosity and incessant petty internecine office bullshit. The people that lasted, in that organization, were not necessarily the best or the brightest. They were the ones who truly believed—who saw Steinbrenner not as a world-historic butthead but a passionate man of vision, and who put up with his shit because the mystique and majesty of the franchise made it worth it. Caring about any team is a matter of faith, but the people that rose and stuck in the Yankees culture had to believe in a way that canceled out the ugliness and stupidity roiling around them.

Waldman was and is one of those—a survivor, absolutely, but also a believer. That the Yankees would try to stage the announcement Clemens' return to the team as a sort of WWE-style MOMENT is a testament to the deep tackiness of their decision makers. That Waldman would sell it as such, and sell it twice as hard as necessary because of how lame it was, was just her doing her job. The confluence of the team and its bellowing herald and this surly pink brick of a pitcher are what made this the dippy and hilarious and absurd moment that it was. But for all the things that are memorable and funny about this moment, only one is truly essential—if Waldman didn't really somehow believe that she was witnessing one of the most dramatic moments she'd ever seen, it wouldn't have stuck. She really believed it, and there's nothing more absurd or more dramatic than that.

* This piece has been corrected to reflect that the Yankees made the playoffs in 2007.

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Roger Clemens, Suzy Waldman, And The Freakout Heard 'Round The World published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv