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thedeliverygod · 4 years

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Oh hey it’s the father/son feels that I promised

Promises Kept

AO3|ff.net

“Hey, Yukine.” Yato called to get his attention and then nodded towards the door, “Let’s go walk for a bit.”

The blonde boy stared at him blankly for a moment from the other side of the table before answering, “Uhhh, sure.”

Hiyori also shifted, starting to stand up as she announced, “I’ll come with you.”

“Actually, I kind of wanted it to just be us two.” Yato answered softly, immediately defending, “No offense to you or anything, Hiyori. It’s just work related and it’ll probably be boring for you and—”

She waved her hands for him to stop as she sat back down, though the disappointment was clear on her face, “I understand.”

“We can do something together while they’re gone.” Nora, recently re-named Hiroko by Kofuku, suggested from the other side of Yukine.

Hiyori smiled widely, “That sounds great, Hiiro-chan!”

Yato narrowed his eyes and looked between them, “Since when are you two all buddy buddy?”

“A lot happened while you were gone.” The older girl huffed in response as she crossed her arms and he merely let out a sigh.

Yukine shook his head, adding in a mumble, “You got that right…”

“Well if you two are going to go out,” Daikoku reached into his pocket and held out money to Hiroko, “Here’s some spending money.”

She tilted her head and stated, “I have some from working in the shop, that should be enough.”

Daikoku shook his head and continued holding it out, “I insist! Right, Kofuku?”

“Yes, yes! Please take the money Hiiro-chan, we want to spoil you and Hiyorin.” Kofuku cooed and latched onto Hiyori, who gave a soft laugh in response.

Hiroko shrugged and took the money, pocketing it as she answered, “Alright, I guess.”

“You never offer me any spending money!” Yato quickly whined in response and Daikoku glared back.

“You never do anything around here and you’re not my kid. If you weren’t taking care of Yukine, your ass would be back out on the streets.”

Yato ran a hand through his hair and shrugged, “Fine, fine.”

“Funny how I’ve only lived here for about a month now and yet I’m the favorite sibling once again.” Hiroko commented smugly as she looked back towards Yato.

“Shut up, Hiiro. You don’t have to rub it in.” He pouted at her which only made her grin grow wider. Groaning, he finally stood up and waved, “C’mon, Yukine. Let’s get going.”

“Okay.” He nodded and followed after him, stopping to wave behind him, “See you later everyone!”

“Bye, Yukine-kun!” “Bye, Yukki!” A chorus of goodbyes rang out as he continued to make his way towards the front door to put his shoes on.

By the time he had made it outside, Yato was already waiting outside of the front gate. “Are you in a hurry or something?” He did a small jog to catch up with him, swinging open the gate.

“Not really a hurry, but what I want to talk to you about… I can’t say around Daikoku. And Hiyori technically shouldn’t hear about it either, even though she knows about the subject.” Yato kept walking, his face turning serious and Yukine’s small smile dropped.

“Oh. That.” He put his hands in his pockets and bit his lip, walking after him in silence before more apologies start flooding out of him again, “Listen, Yato. I’m really sorry about everything—”

The god put his hand on Yukine’s shoulder and shook his head, “This isn’t about what happened with you, but it’s related. This is actually something that happened to me a long, long time ago; when I was just a kid. It’s something I haven’t told anyone.”

Yukine’s lips parted in surprise as he questioned back, “Really?”

“Why do you look so surprised? It’s not like this is the first secret I’ve trusted you with.” Yato tilted his head as he looked back at him.

“Yeah, I know.” Yukine shrugged, “But it still doesn’t make it any less surprising when you do. You’re kinda… touchy about your past, to put it lightly. Not that I don’t understand why.”

Yato let out a breath and admitted, “Yeah, well, what I’m about to tell you is probably a big reason of why I’m like that.”

“I’m guessing it’s about Fa—I mean, your dad…” The younger boy cringed and shook his head fiercely, “Sorry, I really hate that I ever called him that. And that it still somehow manages to slip out.”

“I mean, join the club.” He gave a small laugh in response and ruffled Yukine’s hair, “It’s not exactly like I’ve enjoyed calling him my dad, either. It’s okay.” He motioned towards one of the park benches, “Anyway, let’s sit down.”

“Okay.” Yukine followed suite, sitting on the other side of the bench and angling himself towards Yato as he waited patiently for him to start.

“So I don’t really have to explain my dad’s goals and wants since I’m sure you’re painfully aware of it yourself now,” He looked away as he began, eventually drifting back to Yukine, “So from the very beginning, Dad made sure no one got in his way or gave me any sort of ideas that contradicted what he was trying to teach me. I was only allowed to speak to him and Hiiro, absolutely no one else. And what I used to do to people, I… I was taught it was a game. Something that me and Hiiro played together. And the more people I killed, the happier he was. At the time, I didn’t really know or feel it was wrong, but I did it purely because I absolutely loved the praise that we got in return for it.”

He looked up to see Yukine watching him, frowning, but still intently listening so he continued. “Anyway, one day I was just sort of messing around and there was a girl who came up a little bit older than Hiyori who asked if I was a god and if I could name her. Since I wasn’t allowed to talk to other people, I just ignored her. But I was curious, so I asked dad that night if there were shinki with no names. I didn’t know it at the time, but doing that pretty much set her up for disaster from the beginning.”

“So I happened to run into her again the next day and noticed she had quite a bit of blight, so I took her to a spring. Once she realized I was trying to help, she asked for my name but I wasn’t supposed to talk to her so, I wrote it in the dirt and… Believe it or not, that’s how I got the name Yato. All because she misread it.” He rested his elbow against the top of the bench and put his chin in his palm, laughing.

“So that’s where it came from!” Yukine reacted in awe before realizing quietly, “So, this girl must be someone really important, huh?”

“She was.” Yato nodded, “After a bit of begging… I named her: Sakura. So as you know now, when a god names a shinki, they see memories of their past life. For some reason, that didn’t happen with Hiiro. So with Sakura, I freaked out. I ended up tossing her weapon form into that spring and I didn’t come back for three days.”

The younger boy jumped up and yelled in disbelief, “Three days!? Yato, you’re awful!”

“I was a kid and I didn’t know what the hell was happening, I’m sorry!” He immediately defended back, sighing, “The worst part is, I knew I couldn’t talk to Dad about it and because Sakura was afflicting me, it got Hiiro in trouble too. So I went back as soon as I realized I needed to fix things between us. From there, Sakura taught me a few hard lessons. I had always been told I could do whatever I want, so she quickly corrected a lot of my behaviors. But it wasn’t all serious; she spent a decent amount of time just playing with me too. And unfortunately… I translated that over to the other type of playing one night.”

“Oh…” Yukine sank back down onto the bench.

“She was horrified and naturally stung me right away. I tried to go after her but I was in agony and not long after I passed out and woke up back at home. As soon as I could I went looking for her and found her at one of Tenjin’s shrines. We made up and she started teaching me more and more about people. What they were really like, not the dark creatures Dad had always described them to be. Eventually I was starting to get conflicted feelings since I wanted to make my dad happy, but I didn’t want to hurt Sakura either.”

“One day, Hiiro came in full of blight so I took her to same spring where I met Sakura and they finally bumped into each other. It was pretty casual at first but Hiiro started asking questions that relate to the god’s greatest secret. It started effecting Sakura pretty quickly and I knew deep down that it was bad, but no one had ever told me about it before. Hiiro pressed me to say Sakura’s real name, saying father said to do it, and that was it…”

Yukine was gripping the side of the bench, horrified and angered at the same time.

“Before you go thinking any bad thoughts, Hiiro didn’t know any better back then. She was just as surprised as I was at what happened.” Yato waved a finger at him to get his attention.

The blonde sighed, “I figured as much…” Taking another moment, he asked quietly, “If you don’t mind me asking… what was her name?”

“Tamanone.” Yato answered just as quietly.

Not missing the familiar ‘ne’ at the end, Yukine asked, “Everything goes back to her, huh?”

A tear finally made its way down the gods cheek and he nodded, “Yeah. More than you know.”

“I’m really sorry that I put you through something like that again.” Yukine quickly started getting teary eyed as well and Yato motioned him forward.

Enveloping him into a tight hug which Yukine returned with a small one, Yato rested his chin on the younger boys head, “You’re safe now. That’s all I care about.”

After a minute or two of shared sniffling, Yukine asked in a muffled voice, “I do have one question though.”

Yato let go of him and slid backward, looking at him curiously, “What is it?”

“If Sakura-san already taught you all that, why were you such a pain in the ass when I first became your shinki?” He laughed through his tears and the god laughed as well.

“Old habits die hard, teenage rebellion that never ended, I don’t even know. But I swear I’ve got it down pact now, promise.” Yato grinned and leaned forward to ruffle his hair again.

“You better.” Yukine smiled and wiped at his eyes, “Though I expect you’ll always be somewhat of a pain in the ass.”

“And the same to you.” He nodded towards him, “But I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

#noragami #noragami fanfiction #father and son #yato and yukine #my writing

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floweryfandomnerd · 4 years

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Of Snow and Cherry Blossoms

Summary:

One night, Yato slips away and climbs a mountain, digging around in the snow, he finds what he’s looking for. He can’t help but think back to it when he looks at Yukine, trapped between three borderlines and halfway to being an ayakashi. Blight looks just like bruises.

— This has spoilers for chapter 86!! A character study of Yato during the flashback from that chapter and also during Yukine’s ablution since I liked the idea of exploring how it would influence Yato’s emotions and feelings during the ablution from chapter 11

word count: 1665

ao3

: : :

Yato stings, whether from the biting cold or the blight on the back of his neck where Yukine pricks him over and over doesn’t matter. Perhaps it is just the utter rage at what he knows he will find buried amongst the snow that stings - the same snow Yukine had fallen with, the snow he’d named him for just a few days ago. Yato drives the plank of wood into the ground with all the force he can muster, its jagged edges push splinters into his hands and his palms are blistered painfully. Yato can barely feel it. Again and again, he hacks at the ground, pulling up dirt with every action, his shoulders hurt and he feels sick to the stomach, sagging with fatigue and retching so much he can barely breathe, Yato keeps digging; how many times has he done this kind of thing now?

Then he strikes something hard, like metal.

For a moment, Yato pauses, he is tired and the blight that afflicts him seeps in heavy. He can’t blame Yukine for the blight - Yato’s memories of this place, memories that aren’t really his no matter how they haunt him, are far heavier. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, Yato steels his jaw as he properly unearths the object. He finds a fridge, it looks the same as in his stolen memories, only dirtier, and Yato swallows down the urge to puke. He’s found it, which means no one else ever did - did anyone even care to look? Maybe that’s a question he doesn’t really want to know the answer to, there probably isn’t even a police report.

It takes everything Yato has in him to force himself to open it, he sinks to his knees and grasps the edge of the door with shaking hands. Then he pulls it open, eyes closed to give himself one more moment to brace himself. The smell hits him anyway, old blood and decay. Yato tugs his scarf up over his mouth and nose to block it out. It does little to help. When Yato opens his eyes, he wishes he hadn’t. The cold of the mountaintop only ever briefly uncovered by snow and the protection from the elements the boy’s horrid coffin provides has preserved the body well despite the decades that have passed. Or well enough, at least, that Yato can still see the bruises that marr him all over. Yukine’s body looks as broken as Yato knows he feels inside, the image stings nastily like the blight on the back of his neck. Yato balls his fists, fingernails digging into his already ruined hands. He wants to scream and punch something, anything to destroy the site where he stands. His nature has always been a destructive one, it’s hard not to give in.

Instead, he gently picks up the child - just a child, Yukine was just a fourteen year old boy, just a child - and cradles his body in his arms. The tears are hot against Yato’s cheeks. He doesn’t attempt to wipe them away. With one last dreadful glare at the scene, Yato kicks the side of the old fridge as hard as he can, Yukine’s prison and coffin dents slightly, then he leaves that awful mountain behind. He’ll take Yukine’s body somewhere that he can be at peace, and then he’ll do his best to give his spirit peace too. As he carries him away, Yato doesn’t acknowledge the searing pain shooting up his leg from his right foot. It doesn’t hurt anywhere near as much as what he’s found anyway.

It feels like an eternity that Yato’s been walking, leaping and bounding unseen over building tops and countryside, taking precious care of the lifeless boy in his arms, but it is still the same night when he comes to a stop. He’s chosen an old abandoned cemetery with a pretty view of the lake, there are trees at the back of it that sway slowly in the wind and wild flowers growing nearby; it hasn’t been used for over a century - not by anyone but Yato. No one ever comes here but him anymore, the families of those laid to rest in this place have long since forgotten them. He never strays too far from here, hasn’t in a long time. There are too many days where he comes back to visit, and even if he did go far away, it wouldn’t help because he’s never forgotten a single one of them. Yato pushes open the gate.

He buries Yukine beneath the sakura tree where the petals from its blossoms will softly fall in the spring like they have every year since Yato planted it so long ago. Patting the dirt down neatly, Yato marks the grave with a wooden cross. He’d made it in advance, even so, having to use it is almost too much to bear. When Yato is done, the dawn is breaking.

He collapses against the sakura tree in exhaustion, watching the sun rise, Yato sings. It is a quiet melody that fills the air around him with melancholy, an old mourning song one of his shinki once taught him even though she never remembered how she knew it.

“You were supposed to have a long life Yukine, I’m sorry,” Yato says, his voice is thick to his own ears, then he looks upwards at the branches of the tree, “You too, I’m sorry. I’ll give him the chance I stole from you. Sleep well."

He pats the tree fondly, he likes to think that she’s there, and pushes himself up to stand. He leaves wild flowers on Yukine’s grave.

: : :

Yato can barely move. He curls in on himself, lying on the ground outside of Kofuku’s shrine and choking, struggling to find his voice whilst Yukine is frozen in place by Daikoku’s threat to kill him.

Not again, he won’t let it happen again, Yato thinks, he promised to give him a chance to be happy this time around. He hasn’t even seen the kid smile yet, not genuinely. Still, he cannot so much as reach out a hand to the boy, he can’t comfort him, even though he’s so scared. They’ll have to perform an ablution and Yato is scared too - if it goes wrong, Yukine’s last moments will once again be terrified and pained. Yato opens his mouth to tell them to stop, to beg Yukine not to cross that line, instead he coughs up more blood.

Then Hiyori comes back. Kazuma follows her and his face is grim but the three shinki get to work. Mayu, Daikoku and Kazuma each draw their borderlines. Yukine is trapped. He pounds on the walls, pleas to be let out turning to threats as the ayakashi begins to take hold of him. Blight spreads across his skin in splotches, a deep purple just like the bruises his father left on him, Yato can’t stand to look at it. He squeezes his eyes shut as tight as he can and clamps his hands over his ears but it does nothing. He can’t drown it out, he can still hear it, still see it in his mind, Yukine crying and screaming, he can still feel it. It hurts.

Yukine’s name begins to slip, fading away as the ayakashi wins over more and more of him, wings made of blight sprout from his back when he refuses to confess his wrongs. Daikoku winces, all three shinki straining to keep up their borderlines, to not be devoured the way Yukine is so close to being. Yato claws at the ground desperately, if he can just call his name then it’ll be okay, it won’t disappear, he tries to push himself up to face Yukine but can’t, Yato slumps pathetically to the ground. His voice is stuck in his throat, dying on his lips when he coughs up blood. He can’t do anything for Yukine in this life either then, just one horrible existence to another and then nothing, moving from a deadbeat shitty father to a useless master who could do nothing for him before becoming an ayakashi, how unfair. Yato still can’t find his voice, if only he could call his name, he’d do better for the kid than let him be covered in bruises. Do better than only hurting him. If he could just stop Yukine’s name from vanishing, he’d do better… for both their sakes.

“Yukine-kun,” Hiyori shouts, “You can’t go over there, don’t become an ayakashi!” She pushes against the borderlines, ignoring any warnings to get back even when it burns her fingertips, Yukine faces her and Yato can feel his name just slightly more, of course she wouldn’t give up on him either, “Yukine-kun, you have Yato don’t you? Yato even said that he was honing you himself, those words… were like those of a father!”

She pulls him back from the brink with her words, Yukine pauses, staring at her whilst tears run down his cheeks and listening despite the ayakashi.

Hiyori keeps talking, if she can just get through to him then maybe Yato can do something too, “If you keep betraying someone like that again,” Hiyori cries, desperation flooding her voice, ““Then he won’t be your friend anymore!”

It works, just enough. Just enough for Yato to regain a little strength and to breathe enough that he can speak, he lifts his head and pushes himself up to face Yukine, still gasping in breath, “Yukine!” Yato calls, finally finding his voice, “You were given a person’s name so live as a person!”

Yukine breaks, sobbing in regret and finally understanding. Yato can feel it like a weight being lifted off his chest that Yukine understands, to be a shinki is a second chance to live.

He has a second chance, so he’ll be better, Yato promises himself, he won’t ever abandon the poor kid, or hurt him, he’ll be a better father than either of them ever had - he promises.

#noragami #yato #yukine #hiyori iki #flings this into the abyss and hides

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hellanoragami-blog · 5 years

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Chapter 80 Thoughts

The next month is here. Honestly, reviewing this chapter kind of leaves my thoughts all over the place, particularly about both Father and Yukine. I’ll try to get this somewhat organized, though.

Starting from the first part, Yukine is woken up by Kofuku, who he temporarily confuses for Nora. Once the situation becomes apparent, however, Yukine is up almost immediately to check on Nora who has mysteriously vanished from the futon she’d made up.

Giving her the benefit of the doubt, it’s very likely that she woke up early and fled upon seeing Take and his crew there. Yukine did tell her before that the man would probably have her killed, so she’d know it’s unsafe.

At the worst, she is still playing Father’s game and went to meet him for a status report.

The scene changes over to Hiyori, who is still pretty troubled about where she left off with Yato. I believe she’s having doubts about her involvement with Yato, if only subtly. Life has her distracted and unable to go to him, and the confrontation with Kazuma before is obviously leaving her hesitant towards further confrontation.

Honestly not much to comment on here, save for my own worry over whether or not her belief will soon wane. Given the troubled and almost vacant expression she’s wearing for the cover of volume 20, it seems likely that we’ll see her attempt to hold onto Yato’s memory become increasingly difficult.

In fact, if we really want to stretch the possibility, we could say that this is Father’s intention, for Hiyori to forget. He knows very well that Yato’s busy, and with Yukine preoccupied with Nora, that means that there is a big chance that Yukine isn’t currently talking to Hiyori at all, or spending any time with her.

With no interaction between either of them, Hiyori’s memory really will rely on her willpower alone. Given that, it would make sense for this to be a part of Father’s plan, since he could use that against Yato. With Hiyori out of the picture, Yato won’t have anyone else to rely on besides his supposed lifeline. Making Hiyori forget obviously isn’t the Biggest Plan™, obviously, but it does seem to be a stepping stone in it. (I’m guessing he had to change plans when Nora became a sort of tracking device to hunt him down, lol.)

We’re next given a look at Yato and Kazuma’s situation, if only briefly. Their teamwork seems to be getting better, but it’s still wildly out of sync and messy. To be efficient, a shinki and their master practically need to be one body, one mind to know exactly what to do in battle.

It’s clear that Yato and Yukine both know each other’s mannerisms and are able to predict each other’s actions, and that’s what makes them an almost unshakable force. Yato and Kazuma simply don’t have this type of bond, but that isn’t to say that they wouldn’t be able to come close if they continue working on it.

I’m happy to see that Kazuma seems to be calming down and getting his head back on his shoulders, as well. He’s not making any wild, spontaneously solo actions, so Yato’s influence may actually be the medicine he needs to become stabilized, haha. His worry for Bishamon doesn’t seem to be getting in the way of his actual ability to perform, at least. With this, I believe that he and Yato have the potential to become a good team, even if it wouldn’t amount to what Yato has with Yukine.

Boy, speaking of Yukine! The scene is brought back to him, and it’s clear he’s gone looking for Nora. While overlooking the river, he notices a little girl stop to look at him. Upon asking her what’s wrong, she tells him that she’s looking for her uncle. Assuming she’s lost, Yukine follows her in attempts to help her find who she’s looking for. The girl soon gets sidetracked by a cat, and dashes into a tunnel after it. Although uneasy about entering it, Yukine bravely pushes past his fear to go make sure that she’s safe.

I’d kill for a light to see how exactly this tunnel is laid out, but that’s not really important for me to know, I guess. It goes from Yukine peering into another part of the tunnel, to suddenly seeing the bits of memory that was shown back in chapter 70. Yukine suddenly finds it incredibly hard to breathe, and is suddenly seeing more bits and pieces of the moments leading up to his death. The space he was in made it difficult to move, but the last thing he saw before that darkness was his father.

Saying... something to him.

I don’t know exactly what it was, but fast-moon did think it to be parting words like, ‘See ya’. I can’t decide if Adachitoka were trying to put emphasis on the mouth movements for pronunciation purposes, or if they were trying to convey some hot, hot anger. Personally, I think it could be both. They’ve done the pronunciation thing before back in chapter 36, when Nora was saying ‘Yaboku’.

Could he actually be saying part of Yukine’s name, then? It’s difficult to say, since the next piece of dialogue is silenced. But it’s inferred that two things are said, so ultimately it isn’t likely. (I did entertain the thought of his first and last name being said, but that’s a theoretical story for a different post all on it’s own.)

Anyway, Yukine is broken out of the spell by hearing Yato call his name. Most likely an illusion, since Yato isn’t actually there. It works well enough to pull him out of it though, and he manages to destroy the ayakashi on his own--and even collapses part of the tunnel in the process! It tends to happen when his nerves run high. Glorious light! Unfortunately, there’s a not-so-nice surprise waiting up top.

Papa! :D

Pffft, anyway, it’s confirmed that the girl is one of Fujisaki’s three nieces. Father is then sectioned off by one of Yukine’s border lines, and a question showdown happens that lead to more questions than answers.

He claims to be a human--one that chose not to live as a normal person. (Or, lead a normal life like the heavens intended.) That he ‘returned from the underworld, and because he was resurrected, he was called all sorts of things’. He goes on to say that heaven can’t categorize him.

He mentions that he lives and dies as someone outside of his control. The most interesting bit about this is that he possesses the soul; not the body. Characteristically, we have been shown that for a God to possess a person, they either need permission or a strong bond. But it’s implied that only the body is possessed. So what could it mean for a soul to be possessed? Does that mean that Father and Fujisaki’s souls combined into one? Or did Father simply become Fujisaki’s soul? Does he spend his whole life as someone else, or does he end up possessing someone who is already alive?

Perhaps he’s inferring reincarnation; I don’t know if Japan follows a different principle, but typically, when a person is reincarnated, the soul forgets their past lives. Could it be that Father simply is, and has always been Fujisaki Kouto in this life? Perhaps he’s simply carried an awareness of who he is and what he’s done with him, through various lives that he’s lived. For this to even be a thing, it would mean that Fujisaki never was a normal person from the moment he returned from the underworld. It would also mean that Father really is something that can’t be classified as ‘human’, or even ‘God’. To remember everything is possibly much worse than to remember nothing... Jeez. It’d be no wonder he’s so bitter.

He implies that he escaped from the underworld via a soul call, but says Amaterasu wouldn’t permit a human to return like that. Could it be that his punishment was for the heavens to take the life of the girl that he loved? I don’t doubt his information, but I do think he’s withholding a lot. Why, I don’t know.

And we won’t know! Because Yukine is angry and doesn’t want to hear it. :) His emotions ramp up again, causing his borderline to become stronger. He basically goes off on Father for not... being a good father? But then something just snaps inside of him, and he says something that he doesn’t seem to have full control over--or, at least he isn’t thinking before he speaks. In fact, that level of anger literally came out of nowhere. He even vocalizes this. Father seems pretty shocked by it, as well. Then Yukine calms down, and says that he doesn’t want to fight.

And Father, in the coy, evasive way that he does, says that he won’t do anything anymore. Yeah, he won’t. But who will? He still has a plan. You can see it on his face. He then thanks Yukine for being worried about Nora, and that it was probably the right call to let her go. But then he sets the ball into motion, so to speak, by telling Yukine that he’d rather not get her involved; that she died a terrible death. And what a sly expression he’s wearing. Even if he seems to wave him off cheerfully, he clearly has less-than-pure intentions.

It cuts to Yato, who’s being effected by the sudden feelings that Yukine is undergoing. Was it because of when he snapped? Or is it because of what Father told him? He makes the silent vow to be back soon.

Back to Yukine, the kids’ mom comes to get them, and Yukine wonders how Father knows how Nora died. Then, he begins to think: How did he die? Since it was just a choice of words, there’s no way to know how quickly things will progress from here. Will he be in and out like Tsuguha was? Or will it be immediately desperate to know, like how Sakura was? Either way, it seems as though this is the turning point for Yukine’s development.

Perhaps Nora will be the one who ends up having to deal with it. I’m partial to think it’ll happen a bit quickly, due to the fact that he’s already been seeing the same bits of his death. I think when it actually happens, it will be all kinds of messy and devastating--but he’ll survive it. He’s a tough kid. I just wish--or at least hope--that Yato would be there to help him when it happens.

#nana discusses noragami #i'll take a uuuuuhhhhhh healthy shinki plz #ugh ugh #anyway here it is!! finally written #noragami #noragami spoilers #I left in the middle of writing this so please let me know if i forgot to cover something dsgfjhgkf

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echodrops · 6 years

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Noragami 78 Notes

Okay, I put this off long enough (I was busy grading; life is hard).

Here are just a few brief ha ha almost fooled you into thinking I could be brief for a second there thoughts on Noragami chapter 78 under a cut to avoid spoilers.

95% of what I have to say boils down to:

Calm down.

Hey remember that time Yato went off a life-threatening journey and the only thing that saved him was us NOT sitting around waiting for him to come back?

...Yeah, me either. HE’S EVEN WEARING THE SAME OUTFIT AS BACK THEN.

I don’t want to say that Yukine has whatever is coming coming... But when this is how he responds to threats, he sort of has whatever is coming coming. Yukine knows for a fact that Yato’s life is constantly in danger, that he has dangerous enemies, that he gets into trouble at the damn drop of a hat... And he’s still being lax here. This is a prime example of not learning from past mistakes, and that classic Noragami karma is about to smack him hard as hell for it. The manga is literally sending glaring warning signs: You should be with Yato. WHY aren’t you with Yato? What happens after this is going to absolutely be a product of the failure on both sides--Yato’s failure to stay with those who are important to him, and Yukine’s failure for not fighting harder to stay with Yato. Hiyori got smacked already at the end of this chapter for forgetting Yukine and going off on her own to chase Yato, a selfish decision that she paid for with her happiness.

The manga is setting up a very purposeful parallel here, I think:

Just as Bishamon and Kazuma become lost the moment they are separated from each other, Yato’s sense goes out the window the moment he’s separated from Yukine and Hiyori. Noragami repeats this lesson over and over again: We need each other. We need to rely on others. We need to have guidance, and trust, and support.

And Yukine and Hiyori’s failure to do that over the last couple chapters--as well as Yato’s failure to accept their closeness--is going to send them all straight into another crisis. I’ll eat my own post if things aren’t about to go from bad to downright terrible again, with this issue of failing to rely on each other at the very heart.

How much of Nora’s “emotionlessness” is a result of this line of thinking? If she doesn’t think that she should behave like a living girl, does that allow her to think and act in ways that other shinki, who cling to their human lives, can not? Is her ability to transform potentially linked to her casting aside humanity? I am interested to see how far this dismissal of being alive impacts a shinki’s abilities.

Iwami and Kiun are other shinki who might share this mindset to a certain extent, and we certainly know that Kiun is powerful...

Is it just me, or doesn’t this scenery looks very similar to:

The scenery we saw on the page where Father was holding his dead lover/wife/whoever Freckle Girl was to him?

Is it possible that that’s her body? That he didn’t even bury her but went right on living right next to her corpse? JUST HOW MESSED UP IS FATHER? Veryyyy interesting.

Also, the fact that Mizuchi says there were only three people in the beginning implies that she never met the Freckle Girl and that Freckle Girl was not around at the time that she and Yato existed.

Father was only “playing house”--to replace the real home and happiness he lost?

The concept of “playing house” in Noragami is very interesting. It only comes up in the context of gods and humans; we’ve seen it three now in the context of (what is likely) a god playing house with a human: Kofuku hurt Daikoku by trying to “play house” and raise a child; Bishamon hurt her shinki (and was hurt by her shinki) for trying to foster a motherly relationship with them; and Father pretended at kindness and care for his “children” while they were all aware of the real truth.

You could argue that one of these things is not like the other--both Kofuku and Bishamon did what they did out of love, while Father is evil--but I wonder if the third case is really that much different than the first two. Why did Father raise Mizuchi and Yato like his children? Was this a one-sided endeavor in which he bought their loyalty with occasional moments of kindness? Is that all there is to it? Or is there something else going on here?

How much of Father’s “playing house” was pure cruelty... and how much of it might stem for a desire for the very thing Heaven denied him?

Let’s see where this goes, hmmm!

It might be too early to call it, but I’m going to put this out there right now: Mizuchi is a child who died without ever being named.

She’s not affected by god’s greatest secret because she has no human name to remember. Father never said that she knew her name, only that she knew her own last moments. This is why she acted so surprised when revealing Sakura’s name turned her into an ayakashi--Hiiro did not understand the power of names back then because she had no human name of her own for reference. Her power to inflict Liberation on others stems from the fact that she has nothing to tie herself to the Near Shore. She was an unwanted child in her human life and continues to feel like an unwanted child in her life as a shinki.

Holy shit Adachitoka, COULD YOU NOT??? I mean, I don’t know if this is right but it FEELS right and nnnnnnnnnnnhhhhhh I don’t want this; it hurts.

(By the way, the top two leaves fluttering in the wind appear to be gingko leaves, a powerful symbol of endurance and duality in Japan.)

An innocent symbol of child-like play with three people in the boat to represent the family she longs to have but never will? Just kill me now, okay? Just kill me now.

Although this is interesting because we see her first boat fall apart and the people tumble away as she’s talking about playing house. So either this is a second boat, or she put the first one back together sometime during her talk with Yukine. So perhaps this second boat represents a new bond, such as between she, Yukine, and Yato? Mmmmm, who knows???

I’m glad that I was right and Yato chose not to name Kazuma. It was the right choice, even though I’m sad we didn’t get to see what Kazuma would look like as Yato’s shinki. (Well, then again, there’s still time, isn’t there?) We got trolled hard by Scissors-kun, lol.

The line up there is very interesting, isn’t it--because it’s such a Father way of thinking! This is Father’s exact ideology, that humans have no reason for loving the gods and yet they do anyway, accepting the cruelty and abuse of Heaven without question. Kazuma is tripping over the same issue from a different perspective--instead of having something taken from him by Heaven, he’s suffering because of something Heaven is not capable (or perhaps willing) to give. It’s a dangerous line of thought that leads down a dark path. This is honestly the scariest thing Kazuma did all chapter to me!

Is he thinking of Hiyori when he says “people like me” here? Or is he implying that Yato has hurt him in ways similar to Bishamon? The ambiguity of the references here is worth noting. Also worth noting: Yato has no idea what Kazuma is talking about here. Yato doesn’t share his father’s mindset and he doesn’t share Kazuma’s either. I don’t think that Yato sees a huge divide between the love gods can give and the love humans long to receive. He knows they’re not the same (maybe they’re not the same), but I don’t think he would let the issues that Kazuma is dealing with separate him and Hiyori... Or perhaps I’m just too hopeful. XD

All right, all right, now to the thing everyone is freaking out about...

Why are y’all so anti-Kazuma??? He’s not attacking Hiyori out of cruelty--he’s trying to protect her.

He even says it himself--he recognizes the signs of Hiyori’s infatuation. He sees her inability to avoid getting tangled up in the calamity that surrounds Yato. Who the hell do you think he’s really talking about here? He’s not just talking about Hiyori--he’s talking about himself.

The suffering that he has felt from loving Bishamon and not having that love returned is a pain akin to a curse. It’s enough to drive him to want to die, to fill him with such deep despair that he is willing to forsake all of his morals, his name, his “life”‘s meaning, everything he stands for. Since falling in love with Bishamon, he’s faced catastrophe after catastrophe, seen and dealt with things no human should ever have to face--witnessed friends murdered and murdered a friend, betrayed Heaven, turned his power on literal gods... There is NO DEPTH Kazuma will not sink to out of love for Bishamon, and that’s agonizing. He’s in pain, guys.

And he sees the whole damn cycle about to start again. He sees Hiyori’s feelings. He sees her love... And he sees how much Yato is ruining her life. He sees her forgetting her human family, ignoring their concerns, ignoring day-to-day human activities, being exposed to all the risks that Yato brings along with him, actively suffering at Father’s hand because of her involvement with Yato...

Kazuma sees that Hiyori is going down the exact same path of suffering, of “playing house” that he’s been on for hundreds of years, and so he does the only thing he can do to try and dissuade her: he tells it exactly like he thinks it is. He’s not lying to her here. He genuinely thinks what he’s saying is the truth. He genuinely believes that gods cannot return human feelings in the way that he and Hiyori desire, and that her pursuing Yato will only end in sadness and pain for everyone involved. He’s not wrong to want to stop that by separating them from each other forever.

The problem is, Kazuma STILL thinks that he’s always in the right. He only confessed with “vague words” and yet seems perfectly certain that Bishamon--who has never exactly been a pro at picking up signals from others--totally understood him and rejected his feelings of amorous love.

It hasn’t occurred to him that perhaps his vague words just didn’t reach Bishamon the way he wanted them to, and that she doesn’t understand that he loves her in a way different from just a normal god and shinki loving comradeship. That perhaps all this time she did have more love she could have given, if only she’d known it was needed or wanted. He’s her guidepost, but in this he didn’t guide her.

Maybe Bishamon does know, and maybe she did reject his romantic feelings. Maybe he’s right and gods really can’t love humans. (Kofuku and Daikoku are over here in the corner waving frantically though.) OR... MAYBE Kazuma is being a giant freaking idiot like always and leaping to conclusions he should never have drawn based on incomplete information and “vague words,” and passing his pain and suffering on to others, mistakenly believing he’s doing the right thing while actually just screwing everyone else over hardcore.

One of these two things somehow seems more likely than the other...

Not sure why anyone is freaking out about Hiyori’s tail? He missed (he was only trying to scare her anyway, it seems pretty clear, because if Kazuma can hit lightning in the sky, I think he could hit a target five feet in front of him)--the white stuff around her tail is snow spraying off the roof.

ANDDDDD here we go!!

So Hiyori admits she’s in love with Yato, finally. AT WHAT COST. I hope this didn’t really take anyone by surprise, since it really has been in the works for some time now.

I actually discussed how I felt Hiyori’s feelings were changing and how she was slowly coming to accept her feelings for Yato more than a year ago, in this post: http://echodrops.tumblr.com/post/164900791646/ive-read-different-opinions-on-whether-yatos

Adachitoka did a fabulous job of building up to this moment, very slow, incremental changes in Yato and Hiyori’s relationship. From the moment that Hiyori flashes back to here, where she told Yato she wanted to spend more time with him, to the Capyperland crisis where she envisioned Yato beside her instead of Fujisaki, then actually going to Capyperland and telling Yato that she wanted to be with him longer, to the scene where she allows Yato into her room while she’s undressed, to calling Yato her family to Fujisaki’s face, to seeing her plaque tied to Yato’s--making them soulmates--and NOT rejecting that or demanding Kofuku untie them... I mean, especially that last one.

Like I mentioned last year, Hiyori has spent at least a couple in-series weeks now living under the impression that she and Yato are now soulmates, and the moment she didn’t freak out about that and demand to be set free from that just screamed it to me that, deep down, she was okay with the idea of being in a relationship with Yato, even if she wasn’t quite willing to express her feelings out loud yet.

But now she’s over it. And theoretically, things should get better from here.

EXCEPT LOL JK, IT’S NORAGAMI; NOTHING’S EASY.

Yato and Hiyori are gonna have to WORK for their happy ending.

But you know what? I think it’s coming. Now, more than ever, I think a happy ending is coming.

Calm down. Deep breaths. Have faith.

#Noragami 78 #yatori #Noragami meta #Noragami spoilers #Yato #Hiyori #Kazuma #WHO DID NOTHING WRONG EXCEPT BE AN IDIOT #Mizuchi #Nora #Noragami #I got spoiled like hell on this chapter from the flood of desperate asks #I was laughing pretty hard #I was like What bullshit happened now in Noragami???#I hope some of these theories end up true though #especially that one about Mizuchi

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skadventuretime · 5 years

Text

forever and a day

Happy New Year @starship--phoenix! I was your @noragamisecretsanta2018 Secret Santa, so here is your gift! You said soulmate and time travel aus were your jam, so given the otp, that just screamed reincarnation to me. I hope you enjoy, and had a warm and happy holiday!

She is lost in a sea of sterile white sheets.

Yato tucks in a corner of her comforter, snugs it against skin now puffy and wrinkled with age. The tightness in his throat has only gotten worse.

"Is that you, dear?" she whispers, breath whistling on each exhale.

He takes her hand and rubs gentle circles along the back of it, a hand he's held in grief and joy and the quiet moments that aren't notable at all until times like this. "Yes, it's me."

"Tell me again how we met,” she says, but is interrupted by a coughing fit that sends spasms through her body. Yato knows there is not much time, but he sets the thought aside.

He can feel Yukine’s tension from the other room where he’s keeping vigil with their Far Shore friends, face not a day over fourteen. They have all known this hour would come. No one is ready for it.

He waits for her coughing fit to pass, and then begins. “You saw me on the sidewalk when no human should have seen me...”

Yato tells the story until the very end, no matter that Hiyori’s breathing grows ragged and stills, no matter that tears obscure his vision. He’s still holding her hand and it takes Yukine, hours later, to get him to release it.

As a god, he knows this was all he could ever hope for; a human life’s worth of time in which to condense an eternity of devotion. It was never going to be enough.

Read the rest below the cut, or on AO3!

And so he spends the next two decades finding lost cats and reuniting lovers and doing all the things a former errand god turned god of fortune might do. Yukine remains by his side, and every year on the anniversary of Hiyori’s death they gather round Kofuku’s table to laugh and drink and cry to her memory.

He feels the first tug on the twenty-eighth anniversary of her death.

It’s a small thing at first, barely noticeable beneath the hafuri bond. Something more akin to a muscle twinge or a sour stomach. But as time goes on it becomes more insistent, a slow and steady pull that becomes impossible to ignore.

So one night once Yukine is asleep, Yato winks out of Tokyo and appears in the middle of a warm city where the sun has just set, boots set down on balmy pavement. The tug has a new urgency, like bloodhound who’s caught the scent.

Having come all this way for it, he follows the strange, gut-deep feeling across the usual city trappings, noting palm trees and a large, sluggish river as he bounded from building to building. The air is cloying and so, so hot; he must be somewhere tropical, or at least in summer.

He reaches a giant high rise in what looks to be the financial district. His gut is churning now, almost doubling him over in the pain of it, but it’s bittersweet, like the kind of pain you ask for.

From the feel of it, whatever he’s being led to is in this building. So up he goes, scanning the windows at each level and moving on when the pull contracts again, telling him no, no, not yet.

When he reaches the top floor, the pain vanishes. Inside is a lavish office, dark wood paneling with bright splashes of color. Two people are talking, one a stern looking man behind the desk, the other a young woman, no more than thirty, briefcase in hand and tailored suit like a sheath around her. A lawyer, perhaps. They are arguing; the woman’s gestures become more and more violent until she whirls around and begins to storm out of the room.

Past the window where he hovers, and improbably, impossibly, glances at him.

Deep brown eyes and bold cheekbones, skin black and shining like she houses the heavens themselves.

He has never met her. He could never forget her.

“Hiyori?” he whispers, and then remembers himself.

She scrubs at her eyes and he’s gone before she reopens them, hovering from a new vantage behind the stern man’s desk. A head shake or two and she’s off to the elevator, leaving Yato with a decision to make.

It was definitely Hiyori. Though her flesh may look different, the soul that burned inside was one that he had only just been getting to know, had loved for one precious human lifetime. But did that make it right for him to barge in on her a second time?

Part of him is tracking how long it would take the elevator to reach the bottom floor, where she’ll leave the building and become one of a teeming mass of city goers. It was never a decision at all. When he judges she should be walking onto the street, he teleports into the lobby to watch her go.

She moves differently, stops to talk to someone in a language he has never heard, but it’s really, truly her.

He follows before he can think.

She travels to a more modest part of town, where she enters a small and tidy apartment full of a life spent without him.

Yato wants to soak it all up, the pictures on her side table, the books on her shelf, but he knows he doesn’t have the time before she notices she’s not alone. He clears his throat.

She spins and is on him faster than a starving ayakashi. “Who are you and what do you want with me?” she says, terse but in control. His brain automatically translates the rich, rhythmic language into one he can understand, and allows him to respond in kind. Godhood has some perks.

“I wanted to see you again.” He can’t stop staring at her, drinking her in like a starving man.

She squints, and takes away her forearm from his neck. “Do I know you?”

“Yes,” Yato says, tears welling in his eyes. “You did.”

From there life becomes hectic, stressful, and so full of joy he’s fit to burst. At first Adaolisa, her name now, doesn’t believe him, but as time goes on and she meets Yukine and Kofuku and all their Far Shore friends, she does.

They spend decades together, and he gets another chance to worship the beauty of her skin and the fire of her soul.

And then, as all humans do, she dies, and it hurts more than the first time because now he has lost her twice. What a curse it is, to live forever.

But again, a few short decades later, that pull in his gut is back, and he rejoices. This time he follows it to a dingy part of a cold American city, and Yato finds Hiyori with close cropped bleached hair, slouched against a grimy alley wall with broken glass about her feet, inserting a needle into pockmarked skin.

Yato’s world begins and ends in that moment.

Hiyori’s name in this life is Paul, and he has been using for years after a rotten home life and a society that preaches meritocracy but operates more like a caste system. As in the last two lives, they come together suddenly, like a car crash, and Yato’s understanding of love expands. Her flesh is different yet again, but that determined spirit is the same, and he soon revels in the coarseness of Paul’s stubble against his lips and the assertive insistence of his affection, the night air and cigarette smoke scent of his skin. He does what he can to help her lead a better life, and gets to enjoy the company of her soul once more.

And so it goes. Yato finds her when her name is Marwa and her skin is like the desert at dusk, her voice sweeter than honey; when she’s called Pia and she bends like willow trees when she dances; when her name is Cheng and she only shaves her face once a week so he can feel the grit of her when they kiss. On and on, so many different outsides but always that same bright core, that same essence that he would recognize in any life.

Just as often, she doesn’t make it. He has held her broken body as a teenager, as an infant, body ravaged by men’s tools of war or their more insidious open palms of neglect. There are times he feels the tug too late, when she has a wife or a husband and a happy life, and he simply watches from the window, heart full to bursting; times he feels the tug too soon and must watch her, step by step, walk away from him, unable or unwilling to believe.

But each loss and each joy and each moment he has with her carves him deeper, expands the size of his heart until he understands why Bishamon has so many shinki and marvels at the gift of kindness. Is this what it is to be human? he wonders. So much feeling condensed into a few decades, a nuclear bomb squeezed into a form far too small to contain it.

The world changes around them, new troubles arise, new sorrows blossom, but always he finds her.

He could take a million human lifetimes, strung together until none are alive to believe in him or until the universe stretches so far as to disintegrate, to implode into a single speck of matter that will birth a new universe, and still never understand her the same way twice. Eternity is not long enough to know a human soul.

It is, however, long enough to keep learning. Every life they spend together augments his understanding of humanity and the fragile, defiant way they love. Yato no longer thinks of godhood as a curse; what is there to curse about loss, when it’s only ever temporary? The pain that had seized him the first handful of times she passed begins to lessen as he learns to find joy in endings, those heralds of beginnings. He begins to look forward to relearning her every time, what she’ll look like, what her mannerisms might be, how her laugh will sound; strong, deep, and rich like so many times before, or lighter, with a raucous snort, like her last one?

He lives his immortal life richly, sucking the marrow from the bones of his adopted humanity, humbled again and again at how many forms love takes, how different but ever the same it tastes on her (his, their) tongue. Not every life is easy, or happy, but such is the human way: they struggle, and fight, and cry, and when the dust settles and their needs are met, they love.

And love they do, until the heavens fall and the stars burn up, until all that ever is or was prepares to become something else entirely. In those moments before Time stills, their souls find each other and, like coming home, merge into the newness.

#noragami #yatori #noragami fanfiction #noragami secret santa 2018 #i chainsmoked the left hand of darkness and the lathe of heaven before finishing this so uh #sorry for all the existential angst #this is ur brain on uklg #madi tries words #life was nuts i'm so sorry this is at the 11th hour

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libraryscarf · 7 years

Text

incorruptible

| all chapters |

chapter 26 ~ zenith ( ao3 / ff.net ) + epilogue ( ao3 / ff.net )

zenith (noun) 1. the time at which something is most powerful or successful 2. the point in the sky or celestial sphere directly above an observer

zenith

They go back together, a trifle bruised and tear-stained, but Hiyori is smiling so hard her face hurts.

“I just…I don’t…” Yukine gives his head a quick shake, like a puppy drying its ears. “I just don’t get it, Hiyori. You came back as a—a what?”

“Um…” She pauses. This vein of conversation is starting to discomfort her. “I think…a god? That’s what everyone else seems to think.”

Yukine stares at her for a second. Then he shrugs.

“Well, as long as you’re back, then I don’t really care what you’ve turned into.”

He won’t let go of her left hand, gripping it so tightly her fingers begin to go numb. But neither he nor Yato have tried to touch her darkened right hand.

“I don’t know if everyone else is going to feel the same way,” Yato says from behind them. Hiyori turns her head to look at him over her shoulder. He smiles at her, and for a moment his face is full of joy. But she can see the worry hiding in the wrinkles of his forehead.

They arrive at home before long. Kofuku hauls them in through the door, before hugging each of them fiercely. Her face is urgent and anxious.

“We had some visitors,” she says, finally letting go of Yukine, who clutches his ribs, wincing.

“Yeah,” Daikoku interjects. “The subjugation force.”

Yato stiffens behind her, and Yukine blurts out: “Excuse me?”

“But—but, didn’t you say they wouldn’t want to come here?” Hiyori stutters.

Daikoku shakes his head. “They must really want to find you,” he says. “And it’s no secret you three haven’t had trouble fraternizing with a god of poverty.”

“They moved straight on from Bisha’s place to ours,” says Kofuku. Her eyes drift shut. “It wasn’t fun. Those gods are…not nice.”

Hiyori shivers. Kofuku’s eyes snap open again, and she points an accusatory finger at her. “You’ve scared the panties off a lot of very important people, Hiyoriin.”

Yukine shoots Hiyori a doubtful glance out of the corner of his eye.

“They were also very interested to learn if we’d heard where the two of you were,” says Daikoku. Kofuku suddenly rounds on Yato.

“Speaking of which—you never called us! Not once in all this time! Shame on you!”

She crosses her arms, pouting like a stormcloud. Yato ignores her. He takes a small step forward and his elbow brushes against Hiyori’s. Her entire body warms at the small touch.

“And what did you tell them?” he asks, a hint of coldness under his voice.

“The truth,” says Daikoku. “That the stupidest thing any of you could have done would be to come back here.”

Yato chuckles. “Fair point.”

“They were saying a lot of rude things,” Kofuku says. She still eyes Yato with a wounded expression. “Apparently the angle they’re taking is that the newest threat to their divine rule is a sort of…abomination, who steals the power of ayakashi for herself by using a cursed right arm.”

“Well, that didn’t take long,” Yato growls. Hiyori goes pale, and puts her right arm behind her back.

The five of them stand in silence for a long moment. Daikoku clears his throat.

“You should have enough time to get somewhere safe,” he says. Kofuku nods, her eyes misting over. Yukine looks between the two of them.

“You mean we can’t stay here?” he says. His eyes are wide, bewildered.

Kofuku’s head droops. Hiyori thinks Daikoku might be fighting back tears at the hurt look on the boy’s face.

“’It’s not…’s’not safe,” he grunts, swiping at his eyes with a sleeve. Kofuku pats his elbow. She smiles sadly at them.

“You’ll come back here soon, right?” she asks. “As soon as you can?”

Hiyori’s eyes blur. She takes a step forward, enfolding her friend in a tight embrace—escalating to near-suffocation once Daikoku wraps them both in his huge arms. Two more thumps indicate Yukine and Yato have been sucked into the group hug.

“As soon as we can,” Hiyori whispers, patting Kofuku’s messy pink head.

They change clothes, “borrowing” a pair of Kofuku’s elbow-length gloves for Hiyori to cover her right hand, which would likely induce more than a few questions. The rest of their packing is light. Before they can leave through the back door, a sharp knock echoes through the house.

Kofuku shoves the three of them into the stairwell. Daikoku, eyes narrowed, slides the door open.

“It’s just me,” says a low, measured voice, and a pair of footsteps enters the house. As soon as the door slides shut again, Kofuku waves Hiyori, Yato, and Yukine out of hiding. Kazuma stands in the middle of the living room, polishing his glasses on his sleeve.

“Hello, you two,” he says, nodding to them. His lips curve up. “It’s been a while.”

Yukine coughs, and Yato waves sheepishly. Kazuma’s smile disappears.

“I need to talk to you. It will only take a moment.”

Kazuma makes a discreet exit hardly ten minutes later. “I’ll need to go there first,” he tells them before leaving. “Just to make sure all is prepared.”

Once he has gone, Hiyori takes Yato’s sleeve, pulling him toward her. He looks down at her, questioning.

“I know it’s not the ideal time, but…can we make a stop?” she appeals. “Just one. It’ll be short.”

Yato turns fully toward her, his mouth already forming a refusal. But after a second of deliberation, he closes his mouth again. He nods once.

“Actually…there’s someone I’ve been wanting to visit as well,” he says, grimly. For a moment, his face is very dark. Hiyori looks up at him in apprehension, but he forces a smile again.

“Come on,” he says. “We should leave.”

Two figures slide in through the unlatched window with ease. She already knows her parents are away from the house—things could really hitch if anyone but her brother were here. As they walk down the upstairs hallway, Sekki gleams at Yato’s side. Just in case.

Hiyori sniffs the air. The odor is that of dry rot. There’s more than just one ayakashi around here.

The first one lives in her old bedroom. It’s shapeless, the color of mold, and hissing like a popped balloon. It mutters through sticky, tar-colored lips. She was so young. She was young, and healthy, and she shouldn’t have died.

She lays two fingers against its face and sends it away.

They go downstairs, where another one crouches on the kitchen counter. Even as her hand lifts, Hiyori hesitates. This one feels like it’s already shrinking. It’s about the size of a bullfrog, and croaking a single, unbroken moan.

In the next room over, they hear footsteps. Before Hiyori can react, Masaomi walks in. He stops short, one foot over the threshold, and makes a strangled noise.

“Huh…?”

The frog-ayakashi coughs, sputters, and collapses squishily onto the countertop. Hiyori looks at her brother.

“Hi,” she says.

Five minutes later, the ayakashi is gone, the only residue of its existence an oily stain on the countertop. Masaomi rubs his temples, wearing an expression of complete bafflement.

“So. You’re a god?” he asks. Hiyori nods.

“And you’re…not dead.” She nods again, emphatically.

“And you can…kill…things like that?” He points at the stain where the frog ayakashi had squatted.

“Well,” Hiyori corrects. “Not kill, so much as…send them away.”

Masaomi looks at Yato.

“She kills them,” he says. Hiyori shoots him a glare.

“What?!” Yato’s eyes widen innocently. “They make a little popping noise and disappear!”

“Anyway,” she grumbles. “I needed to see you first. Before we leave.”

Masaomi stops massaging his forehead. “You’re leaving?” he asks flatly. “Right after you came back from the dead?”

Hiyori swallows. “Not forever. Just…temporarily. Until it’s safe.”

“What does that mean?” Masaomi demands, but Yato shakes his head.

“We don’t have time for this,” he says. “Are you willing to help?”

“Yeah, sure, but—”

“Then leave prayers,” Yato interjects. “Tell anyone else to leave them, too. It doesn’t matter at which shrines—as long as they reach her.”

Masaomi looks from Hiyori, to Yato, back to Hiyori again.

“You died,” he says. His voice cracks. And suddenly Hiyori is hugging him, this brother who has been on the sidelines of her life for so long.

“Please don’t do that again,” he whispers. “I’ll help however I can. Just—please—stay safe. Okay?”

Hiyori nods. He squeezes her hard—oof—then gives her three awkward pats on the back. It’s how he always used to end their infrequent embraces. Over her head, Masaomi’s eyes meet Yato’s.

You have to do better, this time around.

Yato nods.

I will.

They walk through the shrine gate around the time the sun starts to sink behind the trees. Yato’s eyes narrow into icy slits when a tall figure walks out of the shrine toward them.

“I hear congratulations are in order,” Tenjin says as he approaches. He clasps his hands in Hiyori’s direction, giving her a slight bow.

“How about you cut the cute shit, and skip to the part where you told Hiyori to throw herself into hell,” Yato snarls. She hears a cracking noise and looks down to see his fists clenching and unclenching, as though they wanted to be holding invisible swords.

“I suggested no such thing,” Tenjin says innocently.

“He didn’t, actually,” Hiyori asserts.

“You gave her some manipulative spiel about the vents being her fault, didn’t you? You fed her just enough information to make her think that—that killing herself—”

“Yato,” Hiyori interrupts, sternly. “He didn’t.”

She takes a few steps forward, so she is between the two of them. She removes the glove on her right hand, and holds her arm out toward Tenjin. His gaze lowers to it, taking in the mottled, purple blight covering the skin, and she feels a twinge of satisfaction at his obvious surprise.

“You said you thought my death wasn’t the solution, and you were right,” she says. “The choice I made with the knowledge I asked of you was entirely my own. That’s the only reason I’m here—isn’t it?”

One corner of Tenjin’s mouth lifts.

“That’s an interesting way of seeing it,” he says. “Obviously, your connection to the ayakashi has something to do with your current form…but I suppose you could think of it that way. Your independence in taking on the form of a corrupted spirit actually resulted in quite the opposite. You were transformed into a purified vessel, ready to take on the role humans had already wished into existence for you.”

Yato snorts. “Yeah, it’s all very mystical and complex. I’m not through with you, old man.”

Hiyori turns to look at him again. Anger and frustration push ridges over his eyebrows, and her stomach twists in pained sympathy.

“I was hoping you’d see,” she says, quietly. “I hoped you’d see that this all started and ended with me. If you’re going to be angry, then be angry at me.”

Yato looks at her, and the rage on his face loosens into confusion.

Witnessing this exchange, Tenjin sniffs impatiently. Hiyori turns once again to face him, but takes a few steps backward so she stands next to Yato.

“And what about my being a god of calamity, or an ‘abomination,’ as Heaven likes to call me?”

Hiyori is surprised to hear how calm her voice is. However frightening the truth may be, she’s already survived worse. Yato scoots closer to her, so their shoulders brush, and she allows herself half a smile.

After all, even a god of calamity can change.

Tenjin taps his chin. “I think ‘abomination’ is taking it a bit far,” he says. “They tend to say that about anything that exposes their corruption or greed. And, as for the ‘calamity’ bit—it all depends on the wishes that woke your godhood. Were they disastrous and vengeful wishes? Or were they prayers for salvation, and righteous judgment?”

His eyes narrow, and he gives a small shrug. “As for me, I believe your new form is for you to decide—not Heaven.”

Hiyori lowers her eyes to her right hand. Hesitantly, she touches her fingertips together. She can feel Yato’s eyes on her.

“Well—now that everything’s said and done,” Tenjin says briskly, “I do still think it would have been simpler for you to just cut your ties with her, Yato. There was no telling whether the narrow path I pointed her toward would bear such successful results.”

Yato’s teeth grind together. Hiyori takes his sleeve with two of her fingers—just in case.

“So you decided to play a game of chance with her soul?” he growls.

Tenjin frowns distantly, turning his gaze back to Hiyori. He looks her over with that same appraisal he gave her when she came to him as a human, asking to know the gods’ secrets.

“It was a risk,” he admits. “But I had a feeling she would pass.”

His eyes meet Yato’s again. Despite being confronted with their cold, deadly blue, he gives a quizzical smile.

“There. Do you still wish to part my head from my shoulders?”

“I think it would feel really, really nice,” says Yato bitterly, though Hiyori notices with relief that the murderous aura around him is abating.

“Then perhaps you will have that pleasure at our next meeting,” Tenjin says. He turns away, signifying the end of the conversation.

“But for now, I have many requests to attend to. Excuse me.”

As the scholar god disappears back into his shrine, Hiyori looks at Yato. His jaw is still working, the muscles in his neck twitching under the stress. Reaching for his hand, she draws soothing circles over his knuckles. He looks down at their joined hands, and then at her face, and—slowly—his features relax.

She smiles at him.

“Let’s go home.”

epilogue

A nighttime breeze whispers through the forest of plaques that hang in disorderly rows around the small shrine, setting them clattering against each other like teeth. Inside the shrine burns a miniature camp lantern. Three dark figures are huddled around it on roll-up mats.

“There’s one left,” Hiyori says, pulling a cheesy bun out of a plastic bag. Yato snatches it out of her fingers before she can blink.

“Well, you’re back to normal,” grouches Yukine from his mat. He’s nose-deep in a comic they picked up at the convenience store along with the food, angling the pages toward the camp lantern as he thumbs through it.

Yato mumbles something around the cheesy bun and ruffles Yukine’s hair, earning himself a swat. Hiyori picks at her own food and watches them, a giggle stinging the corners of her lips.

Rebuffed by his shinki, Yato scoots backwards onto her mat. They sit there for a moment, cross-legged and avoiding eye contact. Hiyori clears her throat.

“How long can we stay here?” she asks, keeping her voice low enough so Yukine can’t overhear.

“A few days,” Yato answers. He licks the remains of the cheesy bun off his fingertips. “Then we’ll hop to the next one.”

“We’ll need to repay Bishamon somehow,” she muses, before Yato scoffs.

“She hardly needs these branch shrines.” He drags a finger through the thick layer of dust that still blankets the corners of the small room, despite Kazuma’s preparations. “If anything, we’re doing her a favor.”

Yukine’s nose droops into his comic, and he jerks awake again with a start. It’s cold in the little shrine, but Hiyori can feel the suggestion of heat from Yato’s body. She clears her throat.

“How…are you?” she asks hesitantly.

Yato turns his head to look down at her. Avoiding his eyes, Hiyori reaches for the blanket at the bottom of the mat and tugs it around her shoulders. The silence wraps around her like a noose.

“I’m happy,” he answers. Her heart drops in relief.

“Even though we’re here?” She nudges her chin outward, indicating their decrepit surroundings.

“Yes.”

“And Heaven wants us dead?”

“I’ve been there before.”

“And the world is still awful?”

“It’s survived this long.”

“And I have a weird, deadly hand that gets rid of ayakashi?”

Yato laughs. Yukine, asleep with his head on page 42, flinches at the noise and rolls over.

“I’m happy about your hand,” he says, honestly. “I’m happy about all of you.”

Hiyori still can’t look at him. Ever since their reunion, new memories have been getting clearer by the minute, but she’s having a hard time trusting them. Some seem too good to have been real.

“I wish…” she starts to say, then stops abruptly, chewing on her lower lip. So much has changed—so much has been complicated by absence and sorrow.

Yato makes a quiet noise in the back of his throat, and she finally looks at him. His eyes glow at her, reflecting and magnifying the light of the camp lantern. She is a moth, caught in them.

“I still take wishes, Hiyori,” he says. His breath ghosts over her eyelids, and she shivers.

“I don’t have five yen,” she whispers.

“We can work something out.”

He dips his head, kissing her right cheek, lingering there so the tip of his nose sweeps the top of her cheekbone. Hiyori closes her eyes.

“Okay.”

He kisses her again, this time between her eyebrows, and she inhales the wonderful scent of his neck.

“I wish…” she says.

He kisses, very lightly, her jaw beneath her ear. Her grip on the blanket loosens, and it falls down from her shoulders, crumpling around her.

“I wish I had told you again,” she murmurs. “Before…all that happened.”

Yato straightens a bit, but doesn’t move away. The tip of his nose brushes hers.

“Told me what?”

Hiyori’s cheeks warm.

“I just—I think I remember once, I said something to you that was really important. And I wish I had said it again. That’s all.”

With effort, she makes her eyes focus on the face so close in front of her. It gives her a small amount of relief to see he’s blushing too.

“That’s not really a wish I can help you with,” he says.

He takes her left hand where it rests on the mat, and kisses it twice: once on the knuckles, once on the palm. Hiyori’s chest burns when he takes her right hand, and after examining it for a moment—the bluish black in the deepest areas of blight, and the sick, ashy purple of her fingernails—he leans down to it, and does the same.

“I love you,” she says, before she can think about it too much and scare herself. Yato goes very still, his lips an inch above her hand.

“That was it, right?” she asks fearfully.

Yato sets her hand down. Before she can move, he cradles her face and kisses her full on the mouth. She clings to his shoulders, dizzy, until he lets her go enough to laugh breathlessly against her lips.

“I love you, too,” he says. A single tear slides down his cheek. She catches it with her thumb before it falls to the mat.

Then she smiles, and kisses him again, long, and smiling, and sweet.

/ in a year /

With her ayakashi-subduing ability, and the gradual slowing down of vent activity, phantoms no longer overrun the Near Shore. She hears it on the radio, and on the television: crime rates are dropping, along with suicide numbers, and the darkness that seemed to wrap itself around the whole country has loosened its hold.

The skies are clear again.

The sunshine is no longer a surprise.

She is still growing accustomed to the prayers and the wishes. It is strange to appear to someone, to hear and address their problem (usually by painlessly removing the phantom-shroud), and to understand that to them, the memory of her existence will last no longer than a bruise. It is disorienting to think of herself as a being of the Far Shore.

She wonders if her parents, her friends, or anyone who knew her will make a connection between the new god born from the cry of a dying city, and the girl whose death a year ago they mourned.

“You didn’t even have to wait ten years for your first shrine,” Yato wails. “I had to wait a thousand.”

“Quit whining,” Yukine gripes. “She deserves it way more than you.”

“Next thing I know, you’ll want to switch masters and serve Hiyori instead. You have no loyalty, Yukine!”

“Maybe I will switch.”

“Maybe I want you to!”

Hiyori sits across from the bickering pair and giggles. Nothing has changed.

It’s true, she still has no shinki of her own. She doesn’t need one—but she does often think about what it might be like to give a wandering soul a new name.

Later, when Yukine has fallen asleep, she and Yato leave the house to talk a walk in the coolness and quietness of the night. It’s a habit they picked up over the past year: a vestige of a nightly patrol that used to be necessary, but is now just part of the routine.

They talk quietly, mostly about trivial things—more glad than ever to have the chance to even discuss trivial things. The return of trivialities means danger is no longer at the forefront of their thoughts.

His left arm wanders behind her, around her waist, pulling her gently into his side with the rhythm of each step. If someone were to watch the road where they walk, they might see a lovestruck young couple. Or they might see an elderly man and woman, strolling in the cool night and enjoying each other’s company. They might see a pair of children, sneaking out after dark. They might see nothing but starlight and stirring grass.

In the faint luminosity, Hiyori’s eye catches a speck of brightness a little way off the path ahead.

“What’s that?” she asks, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen between them. She points to the soft glow, and Yato looks in the same direction. His arm drops from around her, and both of them break off the path, into the grass and toward the brightness.

They stop a few feet away from it.

“It’s a spirit,” Yato says. “An uncorrupted one.”

Hiyori stares down at it. It’s tiny: smaller even than Yukine before he was named.

Somehow, she knows things about it simply from looking. This is a girl: eleven years old. She floats above the grass like a petal from a cherry tree.

“She’s still untouched by ayakashi,” Hiyori notes, with a touch of pride. It’s been a very long time since such a tiny spirit could survive in the open like this. It means she’s doing her job right.

“She should be given a name, before something else gets to her,” Yato says. He looks at Hiyori.

She thought it would be a little while longer before this happened; she thought she’d have more time to prepare. But there is no chance she’s leaving this helpless spirit behind for an ayakashi to ravage. She smiles nervously, and glances at Yato.

“Are you sure?” she asks, failing to not sound panicky. “You could finally have a second shinki.”

Yato glances behind them, in the direction of the roof under which Yukine is fast asleep.

“Nah.” He smiles fondly. “I can barely make it taking care of just one whiny kid. Two would be pushing it.”

His casual tone masks the affection beneath. He and Yukine are a good team. Nothing has to change for them, not for a long while yet.

Hiyori turns back to the spirit, still floating like an iridescent bubble above the ground. Since her godhood, she has never needed a shinki—her right hand is all she’s ever used. Although, she thinks, there’s no telling when that could change.

As though waiting to offer itself to her, the shape with which she will bond this spirit to herself appears in her head. Her arm extends, and the light of the naming shimmers underneath her fingernails.

Before opening her mouth, she glances at Yato again. He’s standing a little off to the side, smiling at her.

She looks back at the hovering spirit, and speaks to it: words that seem to press on her tongue heavier than the rest of them, words older than the oldest god.

/ end /

Thank you so much, for the kind words and messages that pushed me through months of writer’s block. I truly hope you like the ending I gave this story. <3

#scarfwrites #incorruptible #yatori fanfiction #yatori #noragami fanfiction #noragami #*lifts my head slowly from the floor* it's..........d...one.......

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kurisus · 3 years

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Chapter 94-2 thoughts

Had stuff to do last night so here they are now, with a bonus of me speculating on other speculations. As always, spoilers under the cut.

I’m really glad we got that confirmation that Nora was a stillborn spirit/miscarriage/some other such thing. It’s been a fan theory foreeeeever and it does put a lot of things into perspective--why she wasn’t affected by GGS (she likely never had a name to begin with), why Yato saw no real memories when he named her, why she never thought of her and Yato murdering people as wrong, why she envies Hiyori, the list goes on. Yeah, it pretty much explains her entire character. And again, this was something that’s been guessed at for a long time, but having the verbal confirmation is nice.

So then, why does she look like a young teen instead of an infant? I think it’s because she was named with the koto no ha, which allowed her to take on a form closer to how she thought she might look, rather than her literal appearance at death. I don’t think a normal god could even name her, since if she died before being born she wouldn’t really have the will to live on that’s necessary for a shinki, right? But she became a mizuko, ayakashi got hold of her, and Father named her.

Her taking on an idealized appearance for herself is probably why she looks older now than in the Yato flashback chapters. She doesn’t look THAT much older, but I have a feeling she matched her visual appearance to his. Does that mean she could look like an adult if she wanted?

There’s also speculation that she’s trash dad’s biological child with his pockmarked gf, and said gf died while pregnant with her, which is certainly plausible. I don’t really have much of an opinion on this myself, though. If she’s someone else’s kid he could see himself as her savior and thus she’s indebted to him, whereas if she’s his own kid he harbors resentment toward her for her living on (in a way) while his gf did not.

That does raise the question of why Pockmarks didn’t become a spirit. I bet Father was looking for her spirit to name it, whether or not Nora is his daughter. But he never found it, and his hatred toward heaven only grew, so he created Yato instead.

I see a lot of people wondering about the panel of Sakura so here’s my guess. First off, glad to see her again since it’s been a while. Second, I think it’s just because they were discussing a shinki’s past, not that Hiyori is Sakura’s reincarnation or descendant or anything. Hiyori knows what happened to Sakura and the hand Nora had in that (however unintentionally), and how Nora wasn’t affected by the same curse. The panel didn’t strike me as odd while reading, so I just assumed it was because Hiyori was remembering her, and the price she paid for learning her former name.

Every month they don’t reveal Yukine’s final letter my fear grows. It’s gonna be a feelings bomb, I just know it. Whatever it was, it was something that got Nora thinking about her own unusual past.

Moving on to Father, he’s in some strong denial. This chapter was pretty similar to 92-2, in that Father gets his ass kicked by a very angry Yato. So why have a similar thing happen again so soon? I think it’s because now Yato is not only mad on Yukine’s behalf, but his own (this would also explain why Yukine didn’t say anything this chapter). Yato’s been through hell and back recently, trying his hardest to be the one to kill his dad, only for his dad to be like “haha sike tho right”

Kazuma’s slowed down, Yato’s sustained several injuries, but he’s still ready to kill. We truly see his conviction now, and him fighting with his own strength, not just Kazuma’s. Payback is sweet.

All this time, even after all this fighting, even after Yato told him he sold him out, trash dad never thought Yato was seriously out to kill him. Hence the shocked expression on the last page.

Just a couple more things I want to go over. Everyone’s (rightly, imo) assuming that Yato’s last line about “Yaboku” dying with Father as meaning his past self dying, not his present self. Yato has thought of himself as collateral damage this entire arc, but I don’t think he will die. You can all come into my inbox and clown me if I’m wrong, but nowhere in the manga’s future do I see him dying and reincarnating, or just dying. He’s been trying to avoid that his whole life, even though he’s said he’s okay with it if it means his dad goes down.

His past self dying could also be why they drew him in the same outfit he wore as a kid, even though his face was still that of an adult’s. The Yaboku that Father remembers is coming to kill him, and will then be no more.

...and everyone can live happily ever after, right? right???

So, what will happen next? Well, the sun is rising, so if Amaterasu is punctual she’ll get there right as Yato is about to behead Father. But will he be the one to do it? They’ve been building up her involvement, so it feels weird that she wouldn’t do anything against him.

Take and Ebisu still have to destroy his grave, so I think the first half of next chapter will cover their adventure. I wonder how they’ll coordinate the timing of it all, though. Do they have to destroy Father’s soul and his grave at the same time, or just roughly?

we popping the BIGGEST bottles when Father bites it next chapter

After Father dies, what I’m thinking (hoping) will happen is Ooharai will reveal how truly fucked heaven is, and Yato, Yukine, and Hiyori will be like “you know he kinda had a point” and work to fix it. But on the other hand, the mood of late does feel like it’s going to an ending, so my hope could be futile.

I just don’t want it to end anytime soon. this is my emotional trauma support manga and what am I even gonna do with my time if I’m not speculating about what little we know?

Anyway. Hoping for not the end yet, bottom line.

#Noragami #Noragami manga #Noragami spoilers #side note someone remind me to clean out my computer files they are a hot mess and I never have time #or when I do I never remember #live update

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hellanoragami-blog · 6 years

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Chapter 78 Thoughts

Holy moly. A short chapter doesn’t necessarily mean that there’s not much to talk about. In fact, there’s a lot to talk about. (Also, I apologize for the delay! I got mega distracted while writing this.)

We start out seeing Yukine helping Daikoku repair the roof from Take’s abrupt visit. Kofuku was nice enough to make them some lunch, which ends up being Russian roulette onigiri. The pair come down to talk, and Yukine admits that he has no idea where Yato is, and begins to admit that he’s feeling a little worried, despite the fact that he probably shouldn’t be.

He takes a handful of the rice balls and says that he has somewhere to be. Daikoku isn’t too far off the mark, saying that he must be going out to feed a stray cat, or something. The way he words it implies that a few days--at the very least--has passed since Yato’s been gone.

It’s revealed that Yukine’s been taking food to Nora. But Nora sees this as pointless, because she’s dead. She doesn’t need to eat. She even goes on to say that it’s silly for the dead to behave like the living. Nora explains that she doesn’t believe that what she had with father and Yato was family. She acknowledges that they were merely acting the part, but they’re not family, in reality. They were simply tools to spread depravity. She mentions how Yato started rebelling, and how she was not to get in the way of it. But secretly, she hated him for it.

Or... did she? Maybe it was possible that she envied him.

Yato was getting freedom, and he was probably the only good thing she had in their family dynamic. She didn’t want to lose that, but she probably felt helpless to stop it because she didn’t know how. So yes, she was probably angry about losing him as a brother, but envious because he was gaining more freedom to do as he pleased and she felt like she was not able to do the same. Instead, she kept vying for Father’s approval because it was what she had left.

Obviously, this is where she feels like she’s saying too much. I think she’s scared of facing her feelings in that moment. But Yukine steers the conversation to the obvious, that she just kept doing what Father told her to. It’s pretty obvious that Nora feels like she doesn’t have the right to think for herself. But she yearns for a ‘family’, hence the feeling that something is missing.

Maybe she was most happiest when they played house. Or when she got to play with Yato. Because she had purpose in that moment, and a feeling of belonging. It’s something that she wasn’t able to get, no matter how many names that she picked up. No one truly wanted her for her, or wanted to love her as their own. Except for Father, but even still, he uses her more than actually treating her like a daughter.

And there’s something interesting about Nora, as well; if you recall her past, she stopped wearing her kimono the way a living person would somewhere between Sakura’s undoing and Yato’s adolescence.

left over right (living)

right over left (dead)

Father said that Nora knew how she died, not that she knew what her real name was. But at the time of Sakura’s death, it looked like Nora knew what a God’s Greatest secret was; or, at least she had an idea. Yet she seemed shocked that telling a shinki their real name was all it took to destroy them. Up until Sakura, Nora just didn’t seem to think about her own mortality. So she had to have learned about it shortly before that.

(Maybe when Father ‘punished’ her? I’ve considered this. Maybe he hammered the fact that she was dead into her, and this was when they stopped playing that little game of house. Maybe it was after that, that she started wearing her kimono as a dead person, because she thought that it would keep Father from being upset with her. That, or something similar.)

Even Yukine realizes that she just wants to have that, though. She wants to have a real family, and to be loved without her usefulness being the first thing people looked at her for. Family doesn’t have to be by blood; so dead or not, Yato and Yukine aren’t just playing house. They are a family. They made it themselves, and are both content with this.

Nora just... wants that. And there’s no shame in it, contrary to what Father has put in her head. Yukine struggles with his feelings and cheers her up via his own embarrassment--even at the expense of biting into a toothpaste-filled onigiri--and even gets a smile from her. I feel like she genuinely enjoys Yukine’s company, in the end.

But this isn’t all good, from Yukine’s end. There’s no way to know if he’s continued looking for Yato or not, but from the sound of it, it seems like he’s been spending time with Nora instead. But he shouldn’t be giving up the search just yet.

Maybe he feels that Yato isn’t in immediate danger, because Nora is no longer being used as a weapon by Father. (In other words, the guy isn’t a threat if he doesn’t have a weapon.) This is kind of a flawed thinking, though.

Sooner or later, Father will show up to get him. And Nora will have the choice to defend him, or let it happen. It’s hard to say what she would do. On one hand, defending him would be the right thing; he doesn’t deserve it. But on the other hand, if Father named Yukine, then that would give her the opportunity to foster a bond with him. Something that she no longer has with Yato.

Still, I hope that when the time comes, Yukine would have shown her enough kindness to sway her decision.

Then the scene shifts to Yato, who is naming a shinki who suspiciously looks like Kazuma, at first glance. (I see what you played, Adachitoka. But also, thank you for not having Yato name him.) The shinki turns into a pair of scissors, which wouldn’t be useful in battle. So Yato turns him away.

This is interesting, to me. Given Yato’s history, it seems like he’s had a pattern of getting weapons as regalia. Even Sakura, who was a kind and gentle spirit, became a short sword. And Yato even says, every shinki he’s named has just been ‘dollar store junk’. This actually gives me the impression that maybe Yato’s spirit is the one that has changed; he’s become a God of fortune and happiness, one whose goal is to help people. Not much need for a weapon, in that case. It’s hard to say whether or not even Kazuma would become a weapon for him.

Speaking of Kazuma, though... oof. He shows up to once again hound Yato into naming him, which Yato refuses because he knows Kazuma. He’s fond of him, and he doesn’t want him to be touched by a God’s Greatest Secret. But come on, Yato, you’re on a mission to name innocent souls just to get them killed. You’re doing the same thing you’re shaming heaven for. I hope he comes to this realization, soon.

After parting, it is next revealed that Kazuma has a ‘premonition’ of sorts. He intercepts Hiyori, who is out searching for Yato and has no idea where Kazuma has been or what he has been doing up to this point. Naturally, she tells him that everyone is waiting for his return, and that Bishamon would want him there with her. But Kazuma is honestly too far gone to listen.

He recognizes Hiyori’s feelings for Yato, and tells her that Gods and Humans can never be together. That being in love with a God is considered a sin. Which, I just really don’t think is the case. Why would it be? Daikoku and Kofuku are very obviously in love, and there has been no sin to come of it.

Plus, Kazuma wasn’t direct about his feelings, at all. Even if he had been, though, I think he knows that Bishamon just doesn’t have those kinds of feelings towards him. She sees Kazuma as one of her children, and nothing more. She loves Kazuma, but she’s not in love with him. There is a big difference.

This isn’t to say that Kazuma isn’t special to her--because clearly, Bishamon holds him higher than the Ha clan. Kazuma is her last surviving child from her previous family, so of course she would hold him in a different light of appreciation than her other shinki. Maybe Kazuma just misinterpreted these affections.

But there is another thing that separates Bishamon from, say, Kofuku or even Yato, here: Bishamon is an Amatsu-kami, and Kofuku and Yato are both (probably) classified as Kunitsu-kami. Amatsu-kami are heaven-dwelling Gods. Kunitsu-kami, however, are earthly Gods. It seems to me that these two different types of Gods follow different principles in life and love. Kunitsu-kami tend to understand human empathy and emotion more, and they don’t lack the ability to connect with their shinki the same as heaven-dwelling Gods seem to.

I think Bishamon sits somewhere between the two, though, and that’s what makes it so difficult for her. She understands human empathy just enough to have different values than the Amatsu-kami.

I also just really think that Yato would get it, if Hiyori were to tell him that she loved him. But whether he would allow himself to return those feelings is another story. (He does love Hiyori, but he knows that she is technically still a child, at this point. He wouldn’t accept her feelings yet, in that case. People tend to equate love with sexual attraction, but the two are also very different.)

I just think that the way Kazuma’s feelings have been perceived is his own fault. Then Kazuma literally throws Hiyori off the roof with a borderline, just so she can’t get too far. He says that he is going to try transferring his feelings to her, and that he is cursing her to never be satisfied with just pretending to be a family with Yato, and telling her to never go near Yato again. (A bit weird wording, since the scenario had always been called ‘playing house’, not ‘pretending to be a family’.)

I first thought that maybe this curse was metaphorical, like a jinx or something. But one speculator has said that the words were pretty straight-forward and that it was probably an actual curse. (I also shot a question to fast-moon to confirm or deny this, but I haven’t gotten a response yet.) If it is in fact a real curse, what exactly will happen to Hiyori?

She finally confronts her feelings, and starts crying. I think this is because she knows that there really is no going back, now. She can’t just pretend that those feelings aren’t there, because--as Kazuma said--they will never be enough. She’ll either have to be rejected or accepted. (And, even after rejection, it takes a long time for those feelings to fade. And even yet, they may never unless she forgets Yato entirely; doomed to always feel like there is something missing.)

What’s worse is the fact that Kofuku tied their plaques; will they never be at peace with each other? Was Kofuku’s act what lead to this? It’s hard to say.

In the last panel, Hiyori’s tail appears to be missing. I formulated every conceivable way it would be positioned based on her posing, and unless it’s just curled into a spiral under her back or something, it would be shown, I think.

Obviously I don’t think she is dead, but I do think something happened. I don’t know what to think, at this point. I really hope that Hiyori will be fine. She’ll survive, one way or another. But will she actually be okay?

And as for Kazuma... I’m upset with him, but I want to understand. Maybe he got too close to Tsuguha when he killed her, and he’s being affected by the God’s Greatest Secret? (They did say that it had the capability of spreading.) Or maybe this was just something a long time coming.

Maybe he’s so erratic and desperate to keep Bishamon safe because someone he loved while alive died protecting him. I dunno, but something changed him and he’s been on a downward spiral for a long time with no sign of stopping.

Anyway, that’s my own take on things! I hope we get some more answers in the next chapter.

#nana discusses noragami #noragami spoilers #noragami

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thedeliverygod · 6 years

Text

Good Enough

a yatori college AU

Chapter 26/?

AO3|ff.net

“Hey, is everything okay? Your text kind of got me worried.”

Hearing Yato’s voice sent a wave of relief over her for a moment before she remembered the subject of the conversation. Frowning again and heaving a sigh, she answered bluntly, “Um… No, actually.”

“What is it?” His voice got a little bit quieter and she took a breath before starting her explanation.

“I guess my mom got a call from Fujisaki-san last night. She kept quiet about it until this morning when she basically woke me up by yelling. It turns out… he followed us from the train station Christmas night and saw that I didn’t leave your apartment. So she was freaking out about my life decisions and I just basically walked out. I’m at Yama-chan’s house but I’m meeting up with my older brother soon.”

The phone was silent, so Hiyori clarified, “I’m okay, I’m just… in disbelief that she will never listen to my side of things. But I’m also angry as well as scared that he followed us—not really for myself, but… I don’t want him anywhere near you or Yukine-kun.”

She finally heard his voice, though it sounded a bit muffled as if he were holding his face in his hands, “I’m so sorry, Hiyori.”

“For what? It was my idea to stay over at your apartment, plus it’s not like we knew—” She started but was interrupted.

“I should have been paying better attention when we were walking home. I was goofing off and being stupid; you could have been hurt.” He practically sounded on the verge of tears himself, the frustration clearly overbearing.

Hiyori was quick to correct him, “Yato, don’t think like that. It’s like you told me before, all the blame falls on him, you didn’t do anything wrong. We shouldn’t have to worry about him every time we step outside; that’s not living.”

“I know you’re right, but…” She heard a harsh sigh come through the speaker, “Fuck. I wonder what it will take for this guy to actually leave you alone.” After a pause, he questioned nervously, “You don’t have to see him for any of your family things, do you? Especially since he and your mom seem to be BFFs—”

“Actually…” She interrupted quietly, pulling nervously at the bottom of her shirt, “Fujisaki-san and his parents will be at the party for hospital staff—the day before New Year’s Eve.”

“I’m going.” Yato replied before she could get out the rest of her description.

Hiyori blinked in disbelief, “What?”

“You shouldn’t have to deal with this by yourself anymore. But also, he’s trying to intimidate you. He won’t be expecting me, so that’ll throw him off guard too.”

His voice was sincere and he wasn’t speaking out of anger, but she was at a loss for words. “B-but, don’t you have to work?”

“That’s the day I was supposed to be heading over to Kofuku and Daikoku’s. Look, don’t worry about it. Only thing that might be worrisome is what sort of clothes I need to scrounge up… but I can always bug Kazuma. He’s about the same size as me.” Yato continued to ramble, mostly to himself, as Hiyori still tried to gather her words.

Her throat dry, she asked quietly, “Are you sure?”

He finally paused, “Do you… not want me to?”

“It’s just that I—I appreciate the sentiment, but I’m worried for you too, you know. I don’t know what he’s going to do, and then there’s my parents—”

“I mean, you were going to let the cat out of the bag later this week anyway, right?” He questioned, adding, “Plus, uh… it’s sort of already half-way out of the bag, thanks to that asshole. But yeah.”

She finally swallowed, “I know, but me telling them as opposed to you actually having to talk to them are two different things entirely. And especially because of what Fujisaki-san told my mom… they’re probably going to be really harsh towards you and I don’t—”

Yato waved her off, “Look, Hiyori. Pretty much, no matter what, I’m honestly going to be terrified to talk to your parents, particularly your mom, so… It doesn’t really matter. It’s going to suck either way, so let’s just get it over with.”

“You’re right.” She admitted, letting out a breath of air. She placed her hand over her face, trying to ignore all the possible scenarios running through her head, “But… I still apologize in advance for anything they say.”

He gave a laugh in response, “In a way, I don’t really blame them. I probably threw some of the same insults at myself after you first asked me out to dinner and I realized you were actually interested too.”

“That doesn’t mean that any of it is true.” She chewed her bottom lip lightly out of annoyance.

“I know.” He answered softly, his tone still amused.

Hiyori smiled and stayed quiet for a moment before her phone vibrated against her ear. Pulling it back to look at it, she saw it was a text message from her brother.

“What’s up?” She heard Yato’s voice and pulled the phone back to her ear.

“My older brother is getting close. He said he stopped for gas but should be at Yama-chan’s in about fifteen minutes, so I need to start getting ready.” She dangled her legs over the side of the bed and let her feet touch the floor, “I’ll text you later and let you know how it goes with mom after trying again. Hopefully I can make it somewhat easier for you.”

He gave a half-hearted and forced laugh, “I doubt it, but thanks for trying.”

“If you end up not being able to come, that’s alright too.” She added quietly. She was excited at the thought of seeing him sooner than anticipated, but she knew the weight of the visit was definitely a heavy one.

“Short of something serious going on with Yukine, I’ll be there.” He answered confidently.

Hiyori closed her eyes and let out a breath, “Thank you. Bye for now.”

“See ya.”

Shortly after she put the phone down on Yama’s bed, she heard a knock on the door. “You can come in.” As the door slowly swung open and Yama peeked in, she added, “You really didn’t have to leave the room in the first place.”

Yama shrugged, “Eh, your relationship is getting serious so I figured I’d give your space.” Pausing, she tilted her head and asked, “But I did overhear something since you kinda raised your voice a bit. Is Yato coming here?”

“For the New Year’s party, yeah.” She nodded and twisted her hands in her lap, “I’m somewhat glad and relieved but… I know it’s going to be really hard for him, too.”

She took a seat next to Hiyori on the bed, humming, “I think it’ll be a good thing. I didn’t really want you going to that party by yourself. I mean, I know your brother would definitely keep a close eye on you since he knows what’s going on, but since other people at the party know him well I guess there’s more of a chance for him to get pulled away momentarily. Since you and Yato are a couple, anyone talking to you would probably talk to both of you at the same time; in theory.”

“Um, yeah, possibly.” She gave an unsure nod, “I went to a few family business dinners and such with Fujisaki-san when we were dating, but everyone knew him, so that was a bit different as well.”

“Well, my family dinners are a lot more casual, but anytime I brought a boyfriend along, we were almost always addressed together. Especially if they were just meeting them for the first time, if that helps at all.” Yama finished with a small grin.

“It does, thank you.” Hiyori slid the rest of the way off of the bed and stood up, “My older brother is almost here so I’m going to get changed. Thanks again for the clothes, Yama-chan.”

She waved her hand, “Not a problem! Anything for you, Hiyori.”

Giving another smile, she grabbed the shirt and jeans next to her and moved into the bathroom. It was a bit cramped compared to the one she had at home, as was much of Yama’s house, but she had always found it a lot more homey than her own. Her house was almost sterile at times; which made sense, considering she grew up in a family of doctors.

Yama was the tiniest bit taller than her, but they were relatively the same size, so her borrow clothes fit with ease. Looking in the mirror, Hiyori ran a hand through her slightly tangled hair and let out a small sigh. Exiting the bathroom and going back into Yama’s room, she held her dirty clothes in her arms awkwardly.

Yama blinked and waved to her hamper, “Just throw those in there. I’ll get them washed and put them in my suitcase for when we head back to the university.”

She gripped them uncertainly, “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, of course. Just send me a text to remind me to pack them, if you could.” She gave a sheepish laugh before she pointed at Hiyori, “Oh, and if you could do the same for me, please.”

“Oh, right.” Hiyori lightly pulled on the hem of the borrowed shirt, “Definitely.” Feeling her phone begin to vibrate in her pocket, she pulled it out and saw that it was her brother. Accepting the call, the held the phone up to her ear, “Hi, are you here?”

“Yep, I’m right out front.” He answered simply, “See you in a minute.”

After he had hung up, she slipped her phone back into her pocket and reached to grab her coat, “My big brother is outside waiting.”

“I’ll walk you out.” Yama reached for her coat as well as Hiyori grabbed the last of her things.

As they came out the front door, Masaomi stepped out of the car and onto the sidewalk, waving, “Hey.” They both waved back as they approached him, and he added, “Thanks for looking out for Hiyori, Yama-chan.”

“Of course!” She replied enthusiastically and grabbed her shoulders, “She’s always welcome here.”

“Thanks.” Hiyori murmured sheepishly.

Masaomi waved towards the car, “Well, you ready to go?”

She nodded and unlatched herself from Yama’s grasp, “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Good luck.” Her friend’s face faltered into a more serious expression before she flashed another quick smile and turned around.

Hiyori pulled the car door open and lowered herself into the seat. After she had closed the door and pulled the seat belt across her, her brother asked, “Do you have any specific requests for where you want to eat?”

She shook her head, “Not really. I guess somewhere more laid back like a diner.”

“Sounds good to both me and my wallet.” He answered with a small laugh as he started the car.

“More expensive doesn’t always mean better.” She answered automatically before making a sour face, “On top of that, the fancier of a place we go to, the more likely we run into someone who knows us and mom and overhears something.”

Masaomi clicked his tongue in agreement, “…Very true. A diner it is, then. And let’s stay on this side of town as an added measure of security.”

“Sounds like a plan to me.” She rested her hands in her lap and let out a little breath.

He glanced over to her, “Are you feeling any better than you were this morning?”

Hiyori nodded, still looking down at her lap, “I am. It’s just… a lot. But I definitely feel better after talking with both Yama-chan and Yato.”

“So you did get the chance to talk to him already.” He acknowledged and she caught that he had raised his eyebrow in interest.

“Yeah. He, um… He actually wants to come to the New Year’s party. Since Fujisaki-san will be there.” She began to fiddle with her fingers and he hummed in response.

“How do you feel about that?”

Hiyori took a breath, admitting, “I would feel more comfortable having him there, but… I know that the people there, especially our parents, are probably going to give him a hard time. So because of that, I kind of don’t want him to come because I don’t want him to go through that. But he said he’s going to be nervous and have a hard time no matter what so it’s better to just get it over with.” Looking out the window, she added, “I told him it was fine if he ended up not being able to come. He did originally have plans to be with his own family, after all. But he seems pretty intent on coming.”

Her brother let out a small, nervous laugh, “I’ll do my best to help, but you definitely know that crowd just as well as I do. Anyway, did he need clothes or anything? I mean, I don’t know what size he is compared to me, but I’ll do what I can.”

“He’s already going to ask his friend Kazuma-san since they’re about the same size. But if that falls through, I’ll let you know.” She nodded appreciatively, “Thank you.”

“Well, even if it’s a bit unexpected as well as complicated, I’m glad I’ll get the chance to meet him. Or get re-acquainted with him, I guess I should say, since the last time I saw him he was barely up to my knees.” He flashed a grin before looking back at the road, “Hard to believe it’s even the same person as back then.”

She gave a laugh, “Believe me, I know… It was very surreal when I just saw him on campus for the first time.”

“Imagine how it felt to get a phone call from your sister saying she’s dating him now.” He joked back and she flushed a bit.

“Yeah, I get it. It’s weird.” Hiyori mumbled in response, turning her head to hide her face.

He gave another laugh before they fell into a comfortable silence. After another turn, he pulled into a parking spot and announced, “Guess it’s time to come up with our game plan to handle Mom.”

“Right.” She agreed, but her hands were already starting to shake.

#noragami #norgami fanfiction #yatori #my writing #Good Enough

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