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#she's about twelve and a half hours away!
everyangel · 1 year
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over 20k words I’m UPPPPPP ‼️ the way this happens almost every chapter and the world thanks and applauds you for it 🫡 I am so excited 😭😭😭 wishing you the best of luck for editing today !! 🫶
🥹 I am beaming love at you!!! thank you so much, friend. I really hope you enjoy the chapter 🫶🏻
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alchemistc · 9 days
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"Any plans for your days off, Buck?"
Buck knows his grin is a little feral, but he's kind of hoping that'll throw them off the trail. It's barely been a year, and in that time they've had three natural disasters, one copter crash, a boss intent on making Buck's life a living hell, and two almost break-ups.
It's too soon, to know for sure, except Athena and Bobby had known, and Hen and Karen had known even if they were too scared to admit it at first, and Chim and Maddie may have taken a little longer to get there but they'd known.
And Buck knows. He knows he's never felt like this about anyone before. Knows no one has ever had the ability to infuriate him and calm his fears quite like Tommy Kinard can. Knows they could have done this like they joked about six months ago and they wouldn't have regretted it.
Hen is making a face like she's trying to decide if she wants to know whatever head-tilt-cheek-bite sexual innuendo Buck's got in the barrel, because she only appreciates that about half of the time and Buck's praying she decides on no because he's a terrible fucking liar and he doesn't like keeping things from people. But it's sort of a secret, for the next 48 hours, and Buck also wants to bask in it, wants to enjoy keeping it to himself for just a little while.
"Our Buckaroo is all grown up and refusing to over share about his sex life, praise be," Chim chips in, and Buck tucks his chin to his chest and hopes his pink cheeks read as embarrassed.
His phone buzzes in his pocket, and around him lockers slam and voices drift over him. He's only got eyes for the text that just came through.
Bird's ready, suits are pressed, room is paid up. You wanna go to Adele, after? I think I know one of her people.
You know everyone, stop bragging, I'm already impressed
I'm always gonna try to impress you. You still at the station?
Yeah but not for long. I'll see you in like forty
"--right Buck?"
Buck blinks, hums, stares across at Chim.
"Please tell me you're not sexting at work right now."
"Technically, we are off the clock."
"I'll remind Clipboard Buck of that next time he shows up."
He's zipping up his bag when his phone buzzes again.
See you soon, baby.
He's pretty sure he's gonna get away with it - Hen and Chim are arguing about some reality show as they all trudge toward the open bay doors, and though he can hear their voices further back, Eddie and Bobby still seem to be deep in conversation.
Ravi comes out of left field, because of course he does, just finished inventory still clutched in his hand as he rounds the engine closest to Buck. "Hey, Buck, you and Tommy wanna catch that movie tomorrow night? I picked up a shift but I've got like twelve off in between."
Buck winces. Damn, so close. "Sorry, bud, we actually won't be in town."
Which he's realizing now is pretty uncharacteristic of the both of them, and Hen and Chim have clocked it, so he's gonna have to make a run for it, but he catches sight of raised brows and questioning expressions and he can't give them nothing.
"Tommy's taking me to Vegas, we might see Adele, okay bye!"
They absolutely let him make a break for it, let him scramble into the Jeep, let him send them all a quick wave before he peels out of his parking spot, and Buck spends the drive to Harbor viscously ignoring the steady buzzing from his phone.
---
Tommy snags the backpack from his shoulder before he's fully out the door, and tugs a belt loop to pull him close. Buck is pretty sure he'll never get over how much he likes being manhandled, just a bit.
"You wanna tell me why Chim and Hen both wished us a good flight?"
"Ravi ambushed me on my way out the door. Technically, they don't know anything about anything, except maybe Adele."
Tommy's fond smile makes Buck feel all warm and tingly inside, and he basks in the glow as Tommy nudges a knee between the open bow of Buck's legs.
Tommy's expression morphs, a bit, lips dropping as he tilts his head. "You having second thoughts? We don't have to-."
"No. No second thoughts."
"Evan, I know how close you are to your family. If you want to wait, make this something you can share with them, we can hold off."
He's so goddamn charmed by this man - by how he cares, by how well he knows Buck, by a million and one tiny things that Buck gleefully hoards his knowledge of like a dragon over his caverns of treasure.
"I kinda don't want to share you, for this." It's the first time since Tommy's brought it back up that Buck's been able to express exactly why the prospect makes him so giddy, but there it is. Possessive jealous Buck rears his ugly head again, only Tommy has always been a little charmed by that. At least when Buck expressed it in a healthy way.
"The moment they know, it's gonna be a spectacle," Tommy agrees, fingers curling over Buck's side.
"Exactly. So. Take me to Vegas and wife me up before one of them shows up trying to tag along."
He expects the dramatic eye roll, and Tommy's fingers digging into his sides. He doesn't expect the ear-ringing whistle echoing through the bay door to their left, or the smirk on Lucy Donato's face when she lets her looped thumb and pointer finger drop from her lips.
"We should definitely go before any of them remembers to hit her up for more details."
"Why would she -."
"Yeah she caught a look at the manifest and snooped until she found the rings."
"So you're actually worse at keeping a secret than I am."
"They're all gonna know before we land back home."
"Hen's gonna break like thirty bylaws trying to decorate a county owned chopper."
"Evan, seriously, we can still -."
Buck only knows one sure-fire way of stopping Tommy from spiraling too much - he uses the little bit of leverage he has plastered to the open door of his Jeep to catch Tommy's lips, and the resulting pleased hum shivers down his spine. Evan takes a moment to be pleased that Tommy hadn't shaved this morning like he'd threatened, and then he's tilting his head for a better angle and losing himself in it long enough that a few more wolf-whistles make their way across the tarmac -- Wendell and York, most likely, but when Buck finally breaks the kiss to dart a look over Tommy's shoulder, everyone has made themselves scarce.
"You gonna marry me or not, Kinard?"
It's a rare thing, but sometimes, when Buck makes him a little extra wild, Tommy does this growling thing that Buck always feels down to his toes. Tommy kisses him breathless again when Buck responds to this growl with a satisfied smirk.
---
"How much you wanna bet Hen convinces you to do a vow renewal within six months."
Buck's busy nipping at a spot of flesh just above Tommy's transverse abdominis, so it takes a second for his brain to catch up with the words.
"It's gonna be Maddie, and she's gonna rope you into it before you realize what's happening."
Tommy hums, pleased, not denying it, and runs a hand through Buck's hair, palm curling over his crown. It takes Buck a moment to figure out why it doesn't feel quite as familiar as it always does, and then he's reaching for it with a hand of his own, the tips of two fingers sliding along the smooth metal surface of Tommy's ring.
The smile he shoots up from the general area of Tommy's groin is all puppy-dog grin, and he basks in the soft, warm grin Tommy sends back. Buck tracks the crinkle of Tommy's eyes like a lifeline.
"I'm gonna lord it over everyone's head that we didn't get married because of, during, or after a health scare or a natural disaster."
"You asked me two days after we made up because of a flash flood we both thought we were gonna lose each other to, but okay."
Tommy's smile is soft. The fingers that slide around his scalp to brush reverently over his birthmark are even softer. "That time doesn't count, because we didn't follow through. You thought I was joking."
He had, honestly, at first, because they'd technically still been broken up at the time and the adrenaline and the terror at nearly losing one another had still been close. It'd taken him three days and Tommy angrily re-ringing his house key back onto Buck's keychain to realize Tommy maybe hadn't actually been joking about hopping in the chopper the next time they both had 24 off.
He's glad they'd taken the extra time, though. Glad they'd had time to drive halfway across the state in search of a ring shop they could be sure they wouldn't run into anyone at, glad they'd had the time to get new suits tailored, glad he'd had time to fuss over vows he'd still cried about while he was saying them, glad they'd done it without an Elvis impersonator standing just off to the side.
"You're stuck with me now," Buck tells him, and Buck knows Tommy's delighted bark of laughter will keep him warm for years.
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luveline · 2 months
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May I pretty please request an emergency medicine doctor!reader x Hotch blurb? I’d love to see both of them in careers that are difficult, yet despite that they still manage to be together because they understand each other so much. Maybe something with the rest of the team as well if it’s possible 🫶🏼🥹
Emily used to think Hotch would never be happy again. She’d drive him home after work, pick him up in the mornings, and she’d think about how miserable he was, the kind of misery that hooks you in its grip, has you turning to wine or whiskey just to keep breathing. 
She thought for sure he’d buckle. When Hayley died, he’d have to. How could you not? But he kept going and proved she should’ve had more faith in him, becoming the father Jack deserves, and, surprisingly, your partner. 
“You’re squeezing me too tight,” you mumble, just loud enough for Emily and the others to hear you where Hotch hugs you a few feet from the dinner table. “Why are you trying to break my back?” 
“I haven’t seen you in three weeks.” 
“Eighteen days is not three weeks.” 
“It might as well be.” Hotch peels away from you to give you a once over. Emily’s half jealousy and half fondness, seeing him love someone so obviously. “Are you hungry? I ordered for you.” 
“Super hungry. Do I smell like antiseptic?” 
“No, just soap.” 
“Well, that’s not much better.” 
Hotch puts his arm behind your back and guides you to the table. The team squeeze out hellos between mouthfuls and you take your place at Hotch’s side behind a steaming plate. You’re as ravenous as the rest of them after your long shift; Morgan can hardly get a word out of you for the first ten minutes, though he tries, and you attempt to be polite. Emily nudges him until he gets the hint to stop. 
“Here,” Hotch says, putting a heaping of his food onto your plate with a large spoon. 
“Stop.” You attack his spoon with a fork. 
“It’s fine, you like it more than I do.” 
“Don’t care. You need your energy. I’m going to make you carry me up the stairs home.” 
He’s unintimidated. “Ah.” 
“Ah,” you echo. “You sound so doubtful.” 
Hotch looks like he might try to keep flirting with you, but he gives in quickly, betraying how much he’s missed you with a hand slipping under the table. Emily sees his fingers curl over your knee, averting her gaze with a feigned sip of coke. 
She can deduce the silent question you ask one another about anyways. 
“We’ll have dessert,” you say. We won’t skip out early. “What are you having, Dr. Reid?” 
Hotch orders you three different things, which you eat fast. 
“They’re not feeding you at the hospital?” Rossi asks. 
“Three emergency transfers in twelve hours,” you explain, slouching now into Hotch’s side, one slow inch at a time. “I didn’t have time for much.” 
“That’s not healthy,” Hotch murmurs in concern. 
“I’m sure I can ask any of your friends about your eating habits and find a similar schedule,” you brush him off, raising your gaze to Emily, then Morgan, then Rossi and Reid. Everyone smiles the same way. Hotch is caught, and his laugh jostles your shoulder. 
“Have you ever heard the saying, ‘do as I say, and not as I do?’” he asks. 
God, Emily thinks with a huff of a laugh she can’t contain, get a room. 
“He likes that one,” Spencer says. 
“I don’t doubt it.” You lift your lips to his jaw and press a peck to the line of it. One, then two. “Maybe that’s why we've lasted as long as we have. Mutual disregard for our wellbeing.” 
“And a great deal of care for each other,” Rossi says, nodding sagely. “This is why my marriages never last.” 
“Is that why?” Spencer asks. 
“You’ve gotten to be quite the lark.”
“Lark,” Hotch whispers to you. Emily, sitting at his other side, might be the only one who hears, the others distracted by Spencer and Rossi’s ensuing squabble.
“Scoundrel,” you agree. 
“How’s your head now?” 
“It’s gonna be a hundred percent better if you give me that,” you say, pointing hopefully at his full drink. 
He doesn’t hesitate to press it into your hand. Emily would never suspect you hadn’t seen one another for weeks; you move and he follows. You rub your cheek against his shoulder. He touches his nose to your hair, his eyes shuttering closed for one stolen, blissful second. “Missed you,” he says under his breath. 
Emily looks away with a smile. Hotch isn’t hopelessly miserable anymore. 
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wongyuuu · 2 months
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https://www.instagram.com/reel/C4skP1tuO6F/?igsh=MTNtamg3ZmM1aDgxbw==
Can u plssss make a husband mingyu fic of his daughter absolutely hating his haircut go from long to extremely short causing him to sulk and hate his own hair then y/n having to comfort him😭😭 this video legit reminded me of this instantly idek how
i'm not supposed to be taking requests but this was just something that stuck to my mind ever since i read it. so here it is! i hope you like it! i'm also just in time for his birthday
when he cuts his hair
pairing: mingyu x fem!reader genre: fluff word count: 769 warnings: slightly suggestive not proofread
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You did your best to contain your smile, or at least tried to hide it, as your daughter cried into your shoulder, her small tears soaking your shirt and her hands balled into tiny fists in your hair. Under normal circumstances, you’d have taken her hand away but in that moment, it seemed like the only option to have her calm down. 
Your husband sat on the couch, the blanket you kept on the back of it wrapped around his head and shoulder, as his eyes were two full moons in his face. Mingyu was a mixture of laughter and unwashed tears as he watched your daughter cry into you. 
“I didn’t know” his voice came out in a whine, his hold on the blanket tightening “I thought it would be okay”
Mingyu had left the house that morning saying “I’m going to cut hair, I’ll be right back”. He had kept his hair longer for almost a year and it was probably one of your daughter’s favorite things about him — that and also the fact that Mingyu even existed. “Not only does she look like you the most but she also loves you the most” you’d half-heartily complain sometimes. 
It became some sort of routine, if she fell asleep with Mingyu around, she’d most definitely have her hand in his hair. Logically and rationally you knew that Hanna wouldn't like the new haircut, but you also didn’t think that it would be that much of a big deal. What you also didn’t expect was for Mingyu to come back with the shortest hair you have ever seen on him. 
You had known Mingyu for roughly twelve years and he always kept his hair on the longer side. While the sight was a fantastic one, Hanna didn’t seem to share the same idea. 
She ran to the door excitedly the second she heard the sound of keys on the lock to greet her dad. She had the biggest smile on her face and then it just disappeared as she took in her dad’s new look. Her small features contorted and her eyes filled with tears and she ran back to you, hiding behind your legs.
Like he usually did, Mingyu kneeled to welcome the hug that always came but this time there was none. 
You wished you had recorded the whole thing, the way Hanna started to scream her lungs out because “not daddy” and Mingyu was a few seconds away from crying. 
“Hanna” you cooed “you don’t want to say hi to daddy? He missed while he was away”
She shook her head.
“Not daddy,” she said again, the new tears coming down her face.
It took you a good hour to get her to settle down and sleep. Her body still shook with sobs when you put her in bed. 
Mingyu was in the living room, in the same exact position as before, the blanket still wrapped around his head. His eyes were sort of lost until he finally seemed to notice you were back. Once again his eyes were filled with tears. 
“Babe, no, it’s fine,” you said, approaching him. 
When you were close enough he pulled you to him, hands around your waist and his head resting on your stomach. Slowly you pulled the blanket away from him and ran your hand over his hair. There wasn't a lot to hold onto, there was barely any hair in between your fingers, just a little more at the top for a quiff.
“She hates me now,” he complained.
There were these moments when it was hard to tell who was actually the 2 year old and who was the grown man.
“She doesn't, she just needs to get used to it. You're her favorite person” you assure him “She's just surprised. When you left there was hair in your head”
Mingyu groaned at your laugh.
“I just wanted to try something different”
You held his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you. Mingyu rested his chin on your stomach, beautiful dark eyes looking back at you.
“Do you like it, at least?”
You bit your lips, trying to keep yourself from saying that maybe you didn’t like it as much, that your favorite hair was that middle ground between short and longer. 
“You look younger” your words were slow, a little careful.
He groaned, pretending to cry, his arms getting even tighter around you. 
“Both of you hate it”
You bent forward and placed a kiss on his nose and then his lips until his pout was replaced by a smile. 
“At least there’s a little bit to hold on to”
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supernovafics · 4 months
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𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐃𝐋𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓
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"i'll be there for you" universe masterlist
pairing: bestfriend!roommate!steve harrington x fem!reader
word count: 5.7k words
warnings: explicit language, so so much angst (but with a happy ending), some fluff at the end, just a whole lot of emotions in this one!
summary: in which during steve’s birthday ski trip to colorado everything he’s been keeping from you finally comes out 
author's note: i had the idea for this specific one probably since the beginning of this series and now here we finally are many many months later<333 also this one is very much that one episode of friends coded where they were supposed to go skiing but never did. not once do i actually write them skiing in this but i promise the thought was there lol
general note: everything in this universe/series can be read as standalone oneshots but to understand the full “lore” it would prob be best to read the other stuff too<333
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Winter 1986
When you first suggested the idea a month before Steve’s birthday, Robin and Eddie thought that a seventeen hour car ride to Denver sounded like hell. But, it luckily didn’t take a lot to convince them to agree and come along for the weekend trip. Because aside from gas and food, it was essentially a free trip to Colorado. 
You’d all be staying at the cabin that your parents and Steve’s went to during Thanksgiving; which, after enduring an hour-long phone call with your mom when they came back from the trip because she wanted to tell you all about it, you learned that the place was really nice and they all were happy about buying it as a timeshare before even seeing it in person. She also told you that if you and Steve and some friends ever wanted to use it, you could, and you only responded with a half-hearted, “Sure, that would be nice,” because you just wanted to get off the phone, but months later you thought it could be a cool thing to do for Steve’s birthday.
You mentioned it to him first and he liked it, saying that it sounded fun and it would be hilarious to see you finally attempt skiing. You only rolled your eyes and playfully hit his arm in response, and then you mentioned the trip idea that night to Robin and Eddie when you all were on your way to the movies. And once they agreed, the plan became set. 
It was barely four in the morning on Friday, the day before Steve’s birthday, when you all bunched into your car instead of Eddie’s van because he didn’t think it would be able to sustain that long of a road trip. Which, after spending many, many times in the old van, you completely agreed with him. 
The drive surprisingly wasn’t that unbearable— Steve drove a lot of the time because he didn’t really mind it, you forced everyone to play dumb car ride games to help pass the time, Eddie controlled the music for most of the drive, and Robin had to go to the bathroom every hour until she fell asleep for most of the afternoon and evening. When the four of you made it to Denver around ten, you simply picked your rooms and then went to bed because of how tired you all were. 
You woke up at some random time in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, and the loud creakiness of the wooden floors annoyed you and washed away most of your tiredness. When you noticed that it was a little after twelve, you went to Steve’s room, which was right across from yours. You gave his door a quick knock before walking in, the bright moonlight shining through the open curtain of one of the windows did enough to let you see him in bed. He was fast asleep, buried beneath the covers and softly snoring. 
You lightly tapped his back to stir him awake and pulled the blanket off of his head a bit, which revealed his messy bedhead that you forced yourself not to laugh at.
Steve turned his head and looked up at you for a brief moment before letting out a soft, “Hey.”
You smiled at him. “Happy birthday, Stevie.” 
You could tell that he was too tired to playfully roll his eyes at the nickname you had for him that usually only came out during moments like these or whenever you were drunk. 
“Thanks,” He said instead, smiling back at you and letting out a small yawn. 
You walked around to the other side of the bed and got in, pulling the blanket over your legs. “Also, I’m sorry, but I’m an idiot and forgot to pack your present, so you’ll get it when we get back home Monday night.” 
He turned on his side to face you and rubbed his eyes. “Can I know what it is?” 
You nodded. “It’s that denim jacket that you saw a few weeks ago at our usual thrift store. I convinced you not to buy it because I wanted to get it for you. I went back and bought it the next day, and I also put some pins on it that I thought you’d like.”
Steve gave you a small tired smile. “Nice, I knew that you actually liked the jacket.”   
You laughed a bit. “I was honestly surprised that you didn’t immediately see through my lie.”
Steve didn’t say anything in response to that, and instead, you noticed his eyes slipping shut for a brief moment before he was looking at you in the darkness again. You smiled as you pulled the blanket off of you and got out of the bed.
“Okay, I’m gonna go. I’ll see you in the morning when we all go out for breakfast,” You told him, referring to the diner about ten minutes away that you had passed when you all were driving to the cabin and it looked fairly nice.   
“You can stay if you want,” Steve said as he turned and watched you head toward the door, and you shook your head at his words. 
“I know it’s only been a couple of hours, but I really like my bed,” You told him. It actually surprised you how easily you had found comfort in the full-sized bed. “So, goodnight and happy birthday again, Steven.”
You noticed his amused smile as he spoke. “No ‘Stevie’ this time around?”
“I wanted to spare you for a second.”
“That’s very considerate of you.”
“You’re welcome, Stevie,” You said with a nod and playful smile before you opened the door. 
You closed it behind you and then headed across the hall to the room that was designated as yours for the weekend. 
“Wait,” Hearing Steve’s voice at that moment surprised you; you hadn’t heard his door open again or the annoying creak of the floor. 
You turned to look at him, dropping your hand from your doorknob, and even in the darkness of the hallway you could tell that he looked much more awake than when you had left him just moments ago. 
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What’s wrong?” 
“I need to tell you something,” He said softly, and those words immediately made your mind travel back to that conversation you two had after playing basketball in the park. 
“Is it what you’ve been holding out on talking to me about for the past few weeks?” 
He gave you a small nod. “Yeah…”
During that conversation in his car all those weeks ago, he had said that what was going on with him was too hard to explain right then and you decided not to push him further on it because you knew that he’d tell you eventually. 
You weren’t entirely sure why you suddenly felt worried about it all and what he was going to say to you in this moment; maybe it was because of the look on his face that was a solid mix between serious and nervous. “Okay. What is it?” 
“I love you.”
The breath you let out was a mix between a laugh and sigh of relief because you were completely unfazed by his words. “Jesus, don’t scare me like that again. I love you too, Stevie.” 
Was that all he had to tell you? That didn’t entirely make sense to you because it wasn’t like you two hadn’t said those words to each other a million times before. You expected him to laugh and smile along with you, but he only shook his head at first, which made you confused all over again. 
“No,” He said, pushing a nervous hand through his messy hair. “I don’t mean it like how we’ve always meant it anymore. I’m… I’m in love with you.” 
There were only a handful of times that you could say that your best friend had ever rendered you speechless; it was hard to completely stun you into silence when it came to him. Not much that Steve did could ever truly surprise you or throw you for a complete loop because you felt like you knew him well enough that most of his actions just made sense. The last time it happened was when he suggested that you two get Harold, he had never been a huge pet person so it genuinely surprised you when he was the one to come up with the idea. 
And now you had another moment to add to the list; a moment that entirely topped all of the others. 
“Oh.” It was the only word that came to your mind at that moment, and it was barely even a word, it was more so a sound. But, it was the only thing you could say. You didn’t understand how it was possible for your mind to be simultaneously empty and running a thousand miles a minute. “Oh.” 
You could feel Steve’s eyes on you, but yours were fixed on the ground; your sock-covered feet and the dark wooden floors.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything,” He said, breaking the prevailing silence. And when you still couldn’t find any words to say in response to fill the quiet again, he started rambling. “This entire time, these past few weeks, I’ve been waiting for some sort of “perfect” moment to tell you, but nothing ever felt completely right. And then as you were leaving my room just now I realized that I don’t think that I was actually waiting for it to feel right to tell you— because, honestly, there were a bunch of moments where it did feel “right” enough. I was really just holding back because I was worried about what your reaction would be. And I don’t think there’d ever be a moment where I wasn’t at least a little scared or nervous to say it, so I finally decided to just do it now and tell you. But now, fuck, maybe I shouldn’t have said it.” 
“No,” You told him, suddenly somehow finding your voice and finally allowing yourself to meet his eyes. “No, um, honesty is good. You should be, uh— You should be honest about everything. We’re always honest about everything, y’know? It’s good that you said it, I think? Right?” 
You were certain that what you were saying didn’t make any sense; your mouth was moving much faster than your brain. 
A confused look crossed his face. “Okay? Yeah?” 
You dropped your gaze from his and turned around. “I’ll, uh, be right back. I just… I think I just need a second. I don’t know.”
You opened the door to your room and then stepped in, softly closing it behind you and leaving Steve on the other side. You let out a quick breath and leaned back against the door, shutting your eyes in the process, before sliding down it and sitting on the floor. It was cold and you could feel the goosebumps starting to rise on your legs that were only barely covered by your thin pajama shorts. But, the cold was surprisingly soothing, and focusing on that feeling helped clear your mind a bit. Slowly, your thoughts finally started making sense and your brain began moving somewhat normally again. 
The sound of the floor creaking on the other side of the door let you know that Steve was sitting down and leaning back against it too. You wanted to say something to him, but it still felt impossible to find any words right then. 
“I’m sorry,” You could hear his slightly muffled voice through the door. “I really didn’t want this to fuck things up between us, and now it has. And I’m sorry.”
“Things aren’t fucked up,” was what you immediately thought to say— it was actually the first coherent thought that came to your mind in the past few minutes— but, for some reason, it wouldn’t form on your lips. 
Steve’s past words started playing on what seemed like a constant loop in your head. 
I’m in love with you. I’m in love with you. 
The only way you could view this situation, the only way you would allow yourself to view it, was logically. You weren’t considering your own feelings in this moment— whatever they were; you weren’t sure how you were feeling, and you actually refused to think about it right then. 
“It’s not true, though,” You told him, making your voice loud enough so that he could hear you, even though it was hard to speak above a whisper.
“What?” 
“It’s not true,” You said again and then let out a small sigh as you leaned your head back against the door. “You’re not in love with me.” The words felt so weird falling from your lips, so foreign. “You can’t be. Whatever you think you’re feeling now, it’ll blow over in a couple days or whatever.” 
It was a thousand times easier having this conversation without having to look at him right then. You waited for him to agree with you, to maybe even let out a breath of a laugh as he said that you were right. Everything that happened in the past five minutes could become a moment that you two laughed at in a couple of weeks if he simply took it all back.
Remember when you told me that you were in love with me on your birthday? Yeah, that was kinda insane, right?
You actually couldn’t imagine playfully joking about this anytime soon. It would probably be the one thing between you two that would feel weird and awkward for a while— even more awkward than the moment when he accidentally walked in on you naked, and you accidentally did the same thing to him a few months later. But, just like those now unspoken of moments, this would blow over eventually too. 
“No, it is true,” Steve said instead and the absolute certainty in his tone surprised you a bit. “That morning after you picked me up from the bar, it just hit me like a ton of bricks, and it hasn’t changed since. That day at the park when we played basketball, I was jealous that you liked that guy and wanted to get his number, and that’s why I was being kind of an asshole.” He let out a small sigh. “And I did think that maybe all of this would go away and ‘blow over’ too, but it hasn’t. Honestly, it’s only felt more real.” 
You were quiet for a second, not knowing exactly how to respond to that at first. He was being a thousand percent honest— at this point, you knew that— but it was still just so hard to accept it all, to fully let yourself believe it. The thought of him wanting something more changed everything that you had been so sure of for the past almost ten years of friendship. 
“Okay, very dumb question incoming, but you remember us meeting, right?” 
“Yeah, of course,” Steve’s answer was immediate. “That cruise when we were ten. Our parents bumping into each other and meeting and then kind of forcing us to be friends, but we were both glad to hang out with each other instead of them, anyway.”
You nodded at his words even though he couldn’t see you, and felt yourself smiling as you started talking. 
“That trip was our first memory together, and it’s definitely still one of my favorites. We went to the arcade onboard like every day— I beat you a bunch of times at air hockey, but you were way too good at pretty much everything else. And we snuck into that stupid “club” meant for teens almost every night and never got caught, but we were still nervous about getting caught the entire time we were there. From the beginning, it was so clear what we were to each other, y’know? I think by the end of that trip I knew that you were my best friend. I knew that I wanted you in my life forever,” You said, slightly rambling and mindlessly starting to play with the hem of the t-shirt you were wearing, picking at one of the loose strings. “Basically, I guess what I’m trying to say is, the lines were clearly drawn pretty much the first day we met, and they’re not supposed to change.” 
Steve didn’t say anything, and it was then that you wished that you two were standing, or sitting, right in front of each other because you wanted to see his face and attempt to gauge whatever was going on in his mind right then.
“But, it did change,” Was his response after what felt like an hour’s worth of silence, and somehow it was hearing him say those four simple words that made you finally accept everything he had said in the past ten minutes. You finally found yourself believing him entirely. 
“At least, for me, it has,” He added, and there was something about the softness of the statement that managed to break you. A wave of tears hit you so abruptly that you didn’t even get a chance to process why it was happening before your vision became blurry. 
You sniffled and then sighed, haphazardly pushing away some of the stray tears that managed to slip out and attempting to swallow the apple-sized lump that now sat heavy in your throat. “Shit. I’m sorry. I don’t even know why I’m crying right now.”
“Can I come in?” 
Instead of verbally answering Steve’s question, you stood up and opened the door and he didn’t waste a second to pull you into his arms; he had seen you cry enough times to know exactly what to do at this moment. You wrapped your arms around him and buried your face in his chest, letting your tears soak his dark gray t-shirt, unable to hold them back anymore.
“It’s okay. I promise it’s okay,” He said softly as one of his hands lightly stroked your back. “Let’s just forget this ever happened; forget I said anything. I’ll get over all of it. We can just add this to the list of things to take to the grave, okay?” 
He took your crying as a rejection, your way of saying that you didn’t feel the same way without actually saying it to him. 
You didn’t see it that way, though. You honestly didn’t know how you felt— during this entire conversation, you hadn’t considered yourself. It just felt like second nature to immediately try and protect what you two had and not let it change in the slightest. 
When you pulled back and looked up at him, you didn’t really know what you were expecting to see, but he didn’t look sad or upset, he just looked concerned about you. 
You weren’t even entirely sure why you were crying at that moment. Everything that had happened in the past barely ten minutes just felt so overwhelming and confusing. 
You sniffled again and then found yourself nodding at Steve’s previous words. “Okay.” 
“Okay,” He gave you a small nod back. 
You glanced down at his t-shirt, quickly taking notice of the wet spot on it even in the near complete darkness you two were in. “Sorry about your shirt.”
He shook his head. “Doesn’t matter.” 
You hugged him again, pushing up on your toes and letting your arms circle around his neck. He didn’t hesitate to hug you back and that only made you hold him tighter.
“Can you stay in here, please?” You asked, voice quiet but Steve still heard you. 
You felt his nod in response and then moments later you and him were in your bed, not even bothering to get under the covers, and instead simply settling in a position that was completely familiar; your back against his chest, one of his arms wrapped around you and keeping you close, and heads against the pillow. You took hold of his hand and gave it a light squeeze, not completely knowing what you meant with the gesture. 
Neither of you said anything. Not for one minute, and then not for five according to the clock you took notice of on the nightstand.
There was a lot more that you knew the two of you needed to talk about. What just happened couldn’t be something that was forgotten and simply “taken to the grave.” It didn’t feel right to do that. 
However, you were falling asleep with your hand still intertwined with Steve’s before you could even try and think of something to say to him. 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
When your eyes opened again, the first thing that you noticed was that it was still dark outside. You glanced at the nightstand, taking a look at the clock, and it surprised you to see that only two hours had passed; it felt like so much longer.  
You could feel Steve’s steady breathing behind you and that let you know that he was still sleeping. You shifted around to face him, surprisingly not waking him in the process. Your eyes were adjusted to the darkness that surrounded you both so you could see him pretty clearly; eyes shut and lips slightly parted and hair still a messy pile of bedhead.
For the first time probably ever you became so acutely aware of the close proximity between you two. You were only a few breaths away from each other, his arm was still around your waist, and your legs became a tangle of limbs. None of this had ever fazed you before, but it felt a little different now. 
But, it did change. 
It actually physically hurt realizing how right Steve was, and you had to close your eyes as you let the words swallow you whole for a second. 
There was still a part of you that wanted to not think about everything Steve had said— the I love you that meant so much more now— but it felt impossible to do that. It completely took over your thoughts; consumed them, really. 
You thought about how it was damn near effortless to picture something more with him; a something more that now felt so obvious, and in a way, so inevitable. You could see it all so easily.
You thought about past moments that had been shoved away for the sake of protecting your friendship. Late night drunk and high conversations shared between you and Steve that were always supposed to be long forgotten. Moments where the line between friendship and something more was playfully toed but never fully crossed, moments where you two would almost talk about actually crossing that line, moments where the smallest part of you would think about it.
Those moments, and the feelings that came along with them, were never supposed to be remembered when morning rolled around, but you always remembered them. And instead of doing anything about it or entertaining those thoughts in the slightest, you simply buried it all down and pushed it away. You placed all of those feelings in a box deep down inside of you that was never supposed to be opened. 
However, now with Steve’s burst of honesty, it was opened; and you honestly didn’t feel the urge to bury it and push it back down anymore. Instead, you let the feelings that would lead to completely uncharted territories between you and him wrap around you like a warm blanket and find a home in your heart. 
You opened your eyes again and let your gaze fall on Steve. You slowly pushed one of your hands through his hair, knowing that that would gradually stir him awake.
His eyes opened and he only blinked at you for a second before mumbling out a quiet, “Hi.” 
“Hi,” You said, matching his soft tone.
He gave you a curious look, and you knew that he was probably wondering why you woke him up. You simply stayed quiet for a moment, pulling your hand out of his hair and letting it find his cheek instead. 
“I love you too,” You whispered, not breaking his gaze. “I’m in love with you too.” 
Just for a second, there was a part of him that looked surprised hearing your words, but then he was smiling at you, the softest and sweetest smile that actually made your heart ache. 
Before he could say anything, you kept going. “And I’m sorry. I wish this could’ve been my reaction from the moment you said it first. I wish it would’ve hit me the second you said it. Books and movies make this thing look so much easier, but it’s actually really fucking hard.” 
“I know. That’s why it took me almost a month to tell you.” 
“I can’t believe I didn’t see it.”
“I’ve become a really good actor. Might make it my career now,” Steve joked and you laughed at that. 
He kept smiling at you and you smiled back. A comfortable silence took over as the two of you simply looked at each other, admiring one another in the darkness that you’d still be surrounded by for the next few hours. Your eyes flickered down to his lips for a brief moment and then met his gaze again. Out of all of the things that could’ve been said or done right then, it only felt right to close that last breath of distance between you two and finally do one of the few things that you had never done with one another. 
You let your nose brush against his for a brief second before you tilted your head upward a little and let your lips meet his. 
The kiss was chaste at first, Kindergarten-sweet, not much more than just a simple peck. But then Steve was quickly kissing you back, his hand squeezing your waist and pulling you impossibly closer to him, and your hand went from cupping his cheek to tangling within the hair at the nape of his neck. He deepened the kiss with a graze of his tongue against your bottom lip, which elicited the softest sound from you, and you were hit with the sudden thought that you never wanted this moment to end. You wanted to savor this first kiss, revel in it, pretend as if nothing else existed except for you and Steve and this moment that you wished you could drag out for minutes, hours, years.
In a way, it was a little confusing how even though this was completely new, it didn’t at all feel like it. Maybe there should’ve been at least a tiny bit of awkwardness laced within this moment, but the soft feel of Steve’s lips against yours felt familiar, like home, like it was something that should’ve happened a thousand years ago. It was so fucking right. 
You slowly pulled away when you needed to catch your breath and softly dropped your forehead against his, eyes still shut. “Shit. Fuck.”
Steve let out a breath of a laugh that fanned right against your cheek. “I agree.” 
You lifted your head and pressed a quick kiss against his nose before pulling back a bit, meeting his eyes, and giving him a small smile. “Hi.”
“Hi,” He said, smiling back and giving your waist a light squeeze. The warmth radiating from his touch made you wish that his hand was slipping past the hem of your t-shirt and actually touching your skin instead. 
A part of you wanted to let out a small happy laugh at how things had so easily shifted. You were finally kissing the guy that you’d known since you were ten and since an irreplaceable friendship was forged on that weeklong cruise trip. Steve was still your best friend, that didn’t feel like it had changed at all, but that didn’t mean that things weren’t different now; better, in so many unexpected ways. 
However, it also abruptly became a little scary— the thought of potentially losing everything you had with him if things ended badly.
That thought was why you had pushed all of your feelings away and never acknowledged them in the first place. There would always be that part of you that wanted to protect the friendship you two had. 
“Promise,” You held out your pinky for him to take. “Promise that whatever happens, if this doesn’t work out somehow, we will not make it weird or grow distant or leave each other. I can’t lose you in my life. I need you, no matter what.”
He didn’t hesitate to link his pinky with yours as he nodded. “Promise.” 
“And we should just keep all of this between us for now, maybe,” You said, the idea coming to you randomly but it made sense in your head; it felt like the logical thing to do. “Just in case.”
“Just in case?”
“Just in case we end up imploding immediately or something, I don’t know.”
You could tell that Steve couldn’t really see that happening— and in a way, neither could you— but at that moment he let himself agree with you, anyway. “Okay.”
Your lips found his again for a second before you shifted around and settled back in the position you two had fallen asleep in. Steve pulled you back against him, arm circling your waist, and you let out a sigh in contentment as he pressed the softest kiss against your neck.
A comforting silence began to linger and you broke it after a few minutes, hoping that Steve hadn't fallen asleep just yet.
“I’m really glad this is happening right now. Like, really, really glad. I love everything about this moment. And I love you. Like, a lot. And, yes, I know exactly how cheesy I sound right now."
His mouth brushed right against your ear and you could practically hear the smile in his voice as he spoke. “Yes, that was very cheesy. I loved it. And I love you too.”
You only grabbed his hand and pressed a soft kiss against it in response. 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
“Okay, dingus, I know that you’re probably gonna hate me for saying this,” Robin started as she set her mug back on the table of the booth the four of you had been sitting in for the past twenty minutes. The cup looked way too close to the edge of the table, so you reached out and moved it over a bit. “But, I really need you to get a picture of you and your smiley face pancake.” 
Eddie immediately laughed and nodded. “That’s a great idea.”
You turned and looked at Steve, smiling at him. “Please do it. It would be such a missed opportunity if that didn’t happen right now.”
He only rolled his eyes. “I hate all of you for telling the waitress that it’s my birthday.” 
The moment you mentioned it to Carol after she asked the reason why you all were in Denver for the weekend, she smiled and said a “Happy Birthday” to Steve before taking your orders. And then when everything came out, she also handed him a pancake that had a whipped cream smiley face, two cherries for the eyes, and a candle in the middle as the nose. 
Robin pulled the Polaroid camera out of her bag and pointed it at Steve. “Okay, hold up the plate and smile, birthday boy. God, I wish we had party hats right now.” 
“I’m glad we don’t,” He said with another eye roll but still proceeded to hold up the plate and give her a quick annoyed smile. 
When he put the plate back down, you stole one of the cherry eyes and then started on your waffle. The conversation shifted away from Steve and his adorable birthday pancake and went to talking about hitting the slopes in the afternoon. You had been in the middle of mentioning that the drive would only take about thirty minutes when you felt Steve’s hand find yours underneath the table and link it with his. The booth was small and you were already sitting shoulder to shoulder, so the action went completely unnoticed by your friends sitting across from you. 
You and Steve had held hands countless times before, but it felt so much more significant in this moment because now the meaning behind it was so different— this was no longer just a friendly handhold. It was hard to fight how much you wanted to immediately smile at the subtle action, but you kept your face straight and managed to finish out your thought. 
You fought the sudden urge you had to lean your head against his shoulder or kiss his cheek, and instead grabbed your mug with your free hand and took a sip of your coffee. You tried your hardest to pay attention to the conversation taking place at the table— Robin talking about how she was nervous about skiing for the first time, and Eddie saying that yes she probably would be bad at it. However, all you could really focus on was Steve; his hand intertwined with yours and the warmth radiating from the subtle touch. 
You felt equivalent to a lovesick teenager with a crush that actually wasn’t a crush at all because that word wasn’t enough to fully describe how you felt about him. It would be hard keeping this a secret for the time being, and the smallest part of you questioned why you even proposed that idea. But, for the most part, you still agreed with your “just in case” reasoning. If exploring this uncharted territory with Steve somehow ended up becoming the worst idea ever, it would be good that you didn’t tell anyone about it because you two could go back to being just friends without anyone else in the group knowing what happened. 
You hated thinking like that— that it all would or could end, that one or both of you would come to realize that this actually wasn’t a good idea. But, it felt too hard not to think about it for at least a split second. 
Steve gave your hand a light squeeze, it felt both comforting and questioning; maybe he could tell you were getting so deep into your head about something.  
“Feel free to steal the other cherry,” He told you. Your eyes met his and he gave you a look that said everything he really wanted to tell you at that moment but couldn’t, and you let your nonsensical worries wash away for the time being with that reassuring look. 
You placed your coffee mug down and then grabbed the second cherry from his plate, smiling at him as you did so. “Thanks.” 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
let me know ur thoughts<333
(requests are open for stuff you wanna see in the universe/series!🫶🏾)
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ginnsbaker · 5 months
Text
Fic: Right Here, Right Now
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Summary: Marrying the love of your life a second time around is definitely sweeter // An ILGOSS Oneshot.
Pairing: Wanda x Fem!Reader | Word count: 1.4k+ | Warnings: None...? does cheese count? | A/N: Did you miss me? Thank you to the anon who suggested this one-shot. This is set in the ILGOSS universe, but can be treated as an independent story about two divorced wives marrying each other again. This functions more like a drabble, think of it like a missing scene in the epilogue. Enjoy!
Masterlist
-
It's been a grueling twelve hours since you last saw Wanda, and you're practically climbing the walls. Your heart's doing this annoying jittery thing, and the more you try to calm down, the more agitated you become. This whole ‘not seeing the bride before the wedding’ tradition is driving you nuts.
Desperate, you send a text to Natasha. I need to see her, you say, barely keeping it together to type a full sentence. I can't wait till the aisle.
Your phone buzzes almost immediately with Natasha’s reply. On it!, she texts back, and you know she's cooking up some scheme. Relying on your best friend to create the perfect diversion feels like your only lifeline.
It only takes a few minutes when suddenly, an ear-splitting sound erupts from outside, jerking everyone's attention away from the primping and preening. Your eyes shoot wide—trust Natasha to choose something as dramatic as a fire or emergency hazard for a diversion. Part of you frets Wanda might be one of the first out there. Nevertheless, the plan works like a charm. Like clockwork, the room empties out, everyone drawn out by the allure of drama and a juicy story.
You’re half-curious about what kind of ruckus Natasha managed to come up with, but that thought vanishes instantly when you hear the other bedroom door open with a soft creak. A second later, a smile gradually spreads across your lips when you hear a set of footsteps, familiar to you as your own heartbeat. Rising carefully from your chair to avoid stepping on the hem of your pristine white dress, you make your way to the door as quickly as decorum allows.
As you reach the stairs, you spot your bride already making her way down. Seeing her, even with her back turned to you, takes your breath away and seals your fate of forever having your heart in Wanda’s captivity. It's hard to believe you managed to be with her the first time. Harder to think about how you almost lost her in your life for good, but here you are, feeling like the luckiest person in the world to have her back again for a second chance.
“Hey.”
Wanda turns at the sound of your voice, and her smile illuminates the space around her, outshining the sun's rays filtering through the windows. A gentle sea breeze teases her hair, softly framing her face. You stand frozen at the top of the stairs, unable to comprehend how everything you’ve both been through, led to this miraculous moment.
“Hi,” she greets in return, nodding towards the commotion outside. “Everybody rushed out. Could be an emergency.”
You shake your head and smile widely, teeth digging at your bottom lip, helpless as a blush taints both of your cheeks. Wanda looks absolutely stunning, and it's like you're suddenly back in college again, seeing her for the first time. You miss a step, almost causing you to fall flat on your face, just like you did back then.
“I…might have asked Nat’s help to get you alone,” you say with a sheepish grin. “I, uh, I wanted to do something. I-If you’re up for it.”
“Sounds serious,” Wanda teases, perching herself on the handrail. She arches an eyebrow, her eyes reflecting a desire that mirrors your own. It takes every ounce of your self-control, and then some, not to sweep Wanda into your arms and forget about the ceremony altogether. For several seconds, you're silent, prompting Wanda to reach out. Her fingers lightly brush against your arm, and that simple touch sends a pleasant shiver down your spine.
“What’s the plan?” she whispers, as if guarding a precious secret.
Without hesitation, as if the idea has been burning inside you your whole life, you blurt out, “Let’s get married.”
“You do remember we're getting married today, right?” Wanda says, barely hiding her amusement.
You nod, stepping closer to her. “Yeah, I know. But right here, right now, I want to marry you. Just us, committing to each other without anyone else around.”
Wanda's smile softens, and she steps closer. “Just us?” Her voice is soft, almost disbelieving.
You almost back out, feeling a bit silly. “Sounds a bit selfish, huh? Forget I said it—”
“No, don't,” she quickly says, grabbing your hand. “It's not selfish. It's actually really sweet, considering everything.”
You bite back the admission that this impromptu plan was born just minutes ago. Maybe the real reason couples are advised against seeing each other several hours before the ceremony is due to moments like this. Seeing Wanda in her dress, so beautiful, it's hard not to just marry her on the spot, forget the past, forget the plans. Moreso, there's something different about this second time. You're both older, wiser, each with a richer history that stretches far and beyond. It feels more layered, as if you've both fought harder for this moment than for anything else in your lives.
Taking another step down, you move closer to Wanda, holding her gaze. Your own dress trails behind you, its fabric whispering softly with each movement.
“We’re really doing this?” you ask.
“Getting a second shot at being your wife, especially after how badly I messed up… I never thought I’d get that chance again,” Wanda confesses, standing so close you can feel her breath. You tower a few inches over her, yet you feel utterly helpless under her spell.
“If it were up to me, I’d have dragged you to city hall the moment you said yes,” she adds. “But I wanted this moment to be perfect for you.”
And it is, you think to yourself. You almost take her face in your hands, but at the last minute, you decide against it, not wanting to ruin the meticulous work of those who spent hours making her look so stunning–efforts you deeply appreciate. Instead, you guide her hand to your chest, right over your heart, feeling its steady beat under her palm. A small, fragile thing, but it's filled with everything you feel for her.
“Wanda Maximoff, I take you to be my wife,” you swallow thickly, trying your best not to ruin your own make-up. “I am wholly and undeniably yours, and I promise to keep choosing you, every single day.”
You look into her eyes, and there's a whole universe in that gaze. “You're my love, my heart, my home. In this life, or the next. Today, I recommit my life to you, with all that I am and all that I have.”
For a few beats, everything goes quiet, allowing your words to truly sink in between the two of you. Then, you let out a breath you didn't realize you'd been holding, just as Wanda tries to catch hers.
“And I promise to be true to us, to what we have now,” she replies, her slender frame trembling slightly under the weight of her emotions. You swipe away a rogue tear that slips down her cheek, then kiss her forehead tenderly. Her promise clearly reflects on her past mistakes. Though you've forgiven her countless times, you understand the importance of her saying it out loud.
Taking both of your hands, Wanda looks up at you, her eyes shimmering and full of hope. “I promise to love you, to stay faithful to you, to be yours through and through. You're my heart, my soul, my everything—and I'm going to spend every day proving that to you.”
And with that, you feel every part of you intertwining with hers. You lean in and kiss her, soft and delicate. It's as natural as it's always been with Wanda, as if your lips remember what your minds might sometimes forget.
-
Later, just outside your childhood home, surrounded by your closest friends and family, you still cry when Wanda reads you her vows. She does the same when you call her “My wife”, and then again when you address her using your last name.
The reception, following immediately after the ceremony, officially concludes with the remainder of the fireworks that Natasha had launched prematurely earlier as part of her plan to create a distraction, allowing you to sneak in and have a moment alone with Wanda. You and Wanda spend the rest of the night barely taking your eyes off each other, basking in the presence of everyone you’ve ever loved.
If life has taught you one enduring lesson, it's that the most precious things are never easily won. And you and Wanda, you've proven time and again that you're cut out for exactly that— fighting against all odds, for the love that's worth every bit of the struggle.
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tkingfisher · 1 year
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I have had a WEEK.
First Hound got into some chocolate. Ok, this happens to dogs all the time, it’s not baking chocolate, and I know perfectly well that it is not INSTADEATH. Online calculators by weight are like “Yeah, that’s nothin’.” This dog has eaten rotten toads, hardback books, cigarettes…she is a canine garbage disposal. She has also never been sick a day in her life.
Then she starts eating grass. Except Hound does not know what grass is, so she is just in the garden tearing off Random Leaves. I end up chasing her around going “That’s an elm! That’s sticky germander! That’s a rare Himalayan salvia! What are you DOING?!”
Obviously this happens at one AM. Because of course it does.
Then finally she makes a noise like a murloc having an orgasm and all the plants come back up.
Fine, I think. That’s that. Nature takes its course.
Which just proves that I am, in fact, staggeringly naive. The next morning, Hound is breathing shallowly and lethargic. We drive her to the vet school ER an hour away. We explain about the plants and the chocolate and the murloc noises to a nice young vet with a manbun who looks about fifteen years old. They take Hound back, and discover Hound is having severe arrhythmia. Which is a chocolate toxicity symptom. Except we all agree that the quantity she got hold of absolute should not have done that, but hey, maybe she has developed an unexpected sensitivity. They keep her overnight. I leave a large deposit on my credit card. We drive an hour home.
The next day I come pick her up. A nice vet who actually looks old enough to drink gives me a list of symptoms to watch out for, including extreme lethargy. They give me back some of the deposit. Hound comes home.
The next morning, she is extremely lethargic and furthermore, Not Eating.
In a hound, loss of appetite generally happens several hours after all clinical signs of life are extinguished. I drive her an hour to the ER. A nice vet who appears twelve says her heart is working perfectly fine, and suggests pancreatitis. Let’s do an ultrasound. Err…in a few hours, they’re kind of slammed. I go to a coffee shop and attempt to work.
The ultrasound fails because they can’t see around Hound’s stomach, which is enormously swollen. They do an X-ray. There is something weird in there. Foreign body, it looks like. Not blocking anything, just sitting there. “Foamy mass” is the term being used. It has air bubbles. Chocolate wrapper? Weird mass of leaves? (Oh god, was she eating frog eggs out of the pond again?) The vet decides to induce vomiting to get the prize out of this particular canine Kinder Egg. I sit in the waiting room and attempt to work.
An hour and a half later, the vet comes out and says, in awestruck tones, that they have given Hound two doses of their strongest emetic and she will not vomit. “This dog has an iron stomach!” she says. I explain about the toad and the cigarettes. She asks if they were at the same time. (They were not.) Hound stays overnight. I leave a second, larger deposit on my credit card. I drive an hour home.
The next day, the vet calls me, says “So I wanted to give you an update—oh crap! STAT TRIAGE! I’ll call you back!” and hangs up. Some hours later, she calls me back. No, the foamy thing is still there. Stomach is less swollen, though. They’re still hoping she passes it. By the way, did I know Hound has erhlichiosis? I did not, but at this point, nothing surprises me. Hound stays overnight again.
The next day, Hound is transferred to Internal Medicine. Her protein levels are weird, but she is not retaining fluid. (Yay?) If the weird foamy mass is not gone, they will have to perform surgery tomorrow. I leave a third, even larger deposit over the phone. Hound stays overnight again.
The next day, a new vet, of indeterminate age, but with a strong desire to make sure that I understand every single aspect of every single test begins explaining to me about blood protein levels and that they need to do a targeted ultrasound to make sure she doesn’t have a GI bleed. I am so deep in the hole at this point that I’m just like “Yeah, whatever, do it.” Hound stays overnight again.
He calls the next day to say that she has no bleed and no pancreatitis. What about the foamy mass?
What foamy mass?
The…the one that was…I saw the X-rays…?
Well, there’s nothing there now. Maybe she passed whatever it was. No blockages anywhere. They went over her innards with a fine toothed comb. She’s eating like a horse, incidentally. Would I like to take her home tomorrow?
I drive an hour. I get Hound. The vet’s working theory is an erhlichiosis flare-up brought on by chocolate shock. She gets antibiotics, anti-nausea meds, and special bland food in case her appetite decreases. I receive a tiny amount back on my deposit. We drive an hour home.
Hound, cognizant of her delicate digestive state, immediately attempts to break into the litterbox and eat cat poop. I deliver a lengthy lecture on the evils of dumpster diving. Hound gazes at me with great earnestness, then belches gently in my face. Learning happens to other people, not Hound.
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The face of a canine garbage disposal who cost me more than my first car
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calmcoldevening · 6 months
Note
I’m begging you for a part 2 of the knowing the slashers when they were younger fic where they meet when they’re older if you’re up for it ofc🙏
You knew slashers when you were a child and now you grow up and met them
Characters: Thomas Hewitt, Brahms Heelshire, brothers Sinclair
TW: mention of blood, violence, stockholm syndrome.
Ps: english is not my native language, so sorry for misspells. And also i really didn't know what I needed to write about Sinclair, because i need to rewatch the movie to remember their characters, so i didn't write about them. I hope you'll enjoy our sweet Tommy and baby boy Brahms
Part one ˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗
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Thomas Hewitt
You just recently graduated from college and decided to celebrate it with a trip with your friends to one of the US states. The choice fell on Texas. You still had pleasant memories of your school life in this place in your heart, and your heart ached at the thought of how soon you left your hometown. Not that you would call these people friends, but you were good acquaintances and helped each other with tasks. And so you packed your bags and within half an hour you were all driving together in a small SUV. The boyfriend of one of your 'friends' (Jessica) was driving. He was a good man, although he joked about unpleasant topics from time to time. But you turned a blind eye to it. In the end, you will finally find yourself back in the good old Texas.
The road was long, so you had a lot of time to think. You were sitting in the farthest seat, staring into space and slowly stroking an old, slightly battered fox toy with your hand. Your thoughts revolved around one person. That shy little boy you had such a happy conversation with years ago. It was your first memorable friend. You no longer had friends who could surpass sweet Tommy.
Finally, the car turned at a sign with the inscription of a city you know. Your heart started beating faster and you couldn't suppress a smile in anticipation. Soon you will see him again, a sweet shy boy. Although now it will probably be a guy, after all, it's been almost twelve years. This figure was almost painful.
The Texas landscape flowed like a soft canvas on the other side of the window, the sun mercilessly burned his eyes, refracting through the glass. It was hot and stuffy. You're lucky to get into one of the hottest periods in Texas. This place has changed somewhat, although it remains the same as you remembered it. The once small plantings have now turned into real tall trees, although they did not save much from the sultry sun. The wheels of the car turned quickly on turns with an unpleasant sound, raising a cloud of dust behind them. Jessica's boyfriend, Tim, apparently loved playing racer very much, even on the main state road.
By all the laws of luck, Tim abruptly informed you that you were running out of gas. There was a gas station nearby. You entered a small diner next to the gas station, and your heart instantly warmed up. It was that sweet woman, Thomas's mom. Luda-May, isn't that right?
"Hello, Luda," you say with a slight smile, approaching the cash register. The woman looks up at you with a frown, peering at your appearance for a few seconds. Finally, recognition seemed to flash across her face.
"Y/N?" She asks dryly, her voice a little rougher than what you remember from childhood. You nod in response. A warm smile appears on Mrs. Hewitt's face and she hurries out from behind the counter, wrapping you in a gentle, almost maternal embrace. "God, girl.. I never thought I'd see you again. You've grown up so much."
"I'm so sorry that I left so quickly. It was my parents' idea, not mine."
"I understand, honey, don't worry. We've all missed you. Especially Tommy."
The mere mention of his name makes your heart ache. Tommy... You haven't seen him for so long. Your heart yearned for those beloved cornflower blue eyes. You reluctantly pull away from the cozy embrace of Luda, your hand reflexively reaches for your hair, removing a stray strand from your face when you understand the look at a woman.
"You still live there, don't you? Can I see him?"
"Of course, my girl. I've just finished. Hoyt should be arriving soon."
Hoyt? Your brain was carefully trying to find at least one mention of that name in your memory, but nothing came to mind. Strange. Although it may be one of their relatives or friends, after all, you haven't been here for too long, it couldn't have stayed the same, could it?
What was your surprise when that Hoyt turned out to be old Charlie. Although his appearance was now quite pretentious: sheriff's clothes, hat and badge. Something was wrong. This man has been lazy all his life, he could not suddenly decide to go to work in a place related to healthcare. But you chose to remain silent. Hoyt didn't seem to recognize you. When he saw your friends, he invited them to go with them, saying that he had a can of gasoline at home.
"Take the guys, and then you'll come for us. I don't think the sheriff's car can hold that many people," Luda intervened, grabbing your arm protectively. It's got you a little stressed out. Although there was some truth in her words. Five former students came with you, all of them obviously wouldn't have gotten into Charlie's car. The man wanted to say something, but gave up, nodding to the woman.
And so they left. All that time, Luda was asking about your life, enjoying listening to stories from college. She was more interested in this than your own parents. And now Hoyt is back. He was in high spirits. You got to the Hewitt house safely. As a child, as now, the building was still huge for you. Luda carefully led you into the kitchen, offering you tea. God, you've missed this place.
"Tommy! Come here, we have guests," Luda shouted and you heard hurried rustles and heavy footsteps from the basement.
It made you tense up a little bit. Finally, a couple of minutes later, a tall man, the size of an entire closet, entered the kitchen. Your blood turned cold. You slowly looked up. A long, tall body, wavy dark hair and a leather mask on his face. He frowns down at you, seeming to evaluate you with his cold blue eyes.
"Tommy?" As if nothing had happened, Luda-Mae asks in a cheerful voice, "Do you remember Y/N?"
It seemed that at that moment the gears were turning in his head. You needed time to think about it too. Was this huge man Thomas? No, of course, Tommy was a bit of a big kid as a kid, but he was still quite small. The only thing that attracted attention was his bandage on his face. Now it has been replaced by a strange leather mask.
You didn't even have time to think, as careful footsteps were heard from the basement. It seemed, but Tommy and none of the People were found at first. And Tim appeared behind Thomas. God, he was covered in blood and his back was bleeding. Your face is filled with pure horror. And that gave Tim away. Thomas notices your fear and turns around, immediately grabbing Tim roughly and dragging him back to the basement. Your brain screamed like a hunted animal that you needed to get out of here and urgently. Something has happened to this family, something bad, since they communicate with other people like that. But as soon as you tried to run to the exit, at that moment you were hit by something heavy on the back of the head.
His heart ached for you. You were the first person who ever showed him kindness in your life, and now you will surely be afraid of him. God, he wouldn't want to see fear in your beautiful eyes when you're afraid of him. His body was filled with an unpleasant feeling of disappointment and pain. He didn't want that, really. But he wanted to keep you by his side, he didn't want to let you go again. And he didn't want you to hurt the family. So now he was gently wiping the remnants of blood from your beautiful face, tucking stray strands of hair behind your ear. You were still as beautiful, his heart began to beat faster, as it did when he was a child. He saw that toy in your friends' car, you kept it all these years. Thomas couldn't help but smile. Maybe you loved him too? Not now, not after what he did.
The following days were a blur. Your head ached, and an unpleasant heaviness tightened your neck. They put you on a chain. Thomas or Luda would check on you from time to time, Luda would just leave food, and Thomas would just sit on the bed next to you and just look at you. Sometimes he would try to touch you, but you would instantly jump aside like a wounded animal. Thomas's heart ached painfully in his chest. Although.. He deserved it, didn't he? All his life he was looked at with disgust or fear. But he didn't care about those people. All these simple passers-by or victims were just empty meat. But you were afraid of him now. He couldn't stand your gaze, full of fear for your life, so he left the room every time, unable to look in your eyes.
The days slowly followed each other. You were still afraid. But there was something else. Whenever Thomas enters the room, your eyes involuntarily glided over his big strong body. You wanted to snuggle up to him, find comfort in his arms. But there was a part of you that knew it was wrong. They killed people, they killed your friends. They chained you up and kept you here like some kind of dog. And yet your body was begging for his warmth, just like when you were a child.
What was Thomas's surprise when the next time he came into the room, you crawled closer to him, asking for a hug. Your arms clumsily wrapped around his body. Thomas blushed instantly. His heart felt so good. He gently grabbed you by the hips, putting you on his lap, and hugging your fragile body with his strong arms. He buried his nose in your hair. How he missed that feeling. His brain was filled with the scent of your skin. Thomas let out a relieved whimper as you began to gently run your fingers through his tangled hair.
He never left you, he won't let you go into this cruel world again. He will protect you with all his heart. His sweet girl.
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Brahms Heelshire
"Now I've won," the man says in a hoarse voice through his cracked porcelain mask with a doll's face.
He was breathing heavily, hanging over you, his left hand pressed against the wall behind you, while the other reached out to your face, gently stroking.
"Still beautiful," he whispers, caressing your chin with his thumb, tracing your lower lip with his fingernail. Your heart was pounding wildly, you shrank under the man's gaze like a frightened animal. His movements were rough, but his touch seemed almost gentle, as if he didn't want to disrupt this moment or harm your fragile being. His breathing was loud and heavy because of the mask, and the skin under his eyes was slightly reddened. And those eyes. Those warm eyes are the color of pure amber under the bright sun. They looked at you with extraordinary affection and humility. You could recognize those eyes out of a thousand. Like back then, fifteen years ago.
You nervously clutched the steering wheel rim with your right hand, counting the turns. Not so long ago, you managed to get a new job, and who would have thought that this job would be in your childhood home. Or rather, your friend. They always treated you like their own child, so they gave you this job without any problems.
The weather was clear, it was only the beginning of autumn. Some of the trees have already turned golden, their leaves rustling unobtrusively. The sky was clear, without a single cloud, so the sun shone brightly through the windshield of your car. It seemed that nothing could spoil your return to your childhood home.
Your heart was beating fast in your chest. The mind was filled with thousands of pleasant memories of your past together and children's laughter. You missed Brahms so much. It's been a long time since you've seen him.
Finally, after a couple of long hours, you arrived at the Hilsher estate. It remained the same. Obviously, Mr. Heelshire was still carefully tending the garden, growing his wife's favorite flowers. You stopped right next to the driveway, the wheels moving pleasantly on the gravel. After getting out of the car, you went inside without thinking twice. The greenery of this place has always been striking in its beauty, it seemed that no seasons had power over this place, the forests of the estate still gave pleasure with their emerald color and the coolness of the dense grove.
You were met at the very door by Mrs. Heelshire. She has changed a lot since your last visit, of course, the years take their toll. Her eyes were a little red and tired, and there were small bruises under them. Her face was unusually pale and her hair was gray, but not as when it happens from age, but when a person goes through a lot of life difficulties and faces stress.
"Honey, I haven't seen you for so long," the woman said smiling, wrapping you in a warm embrace. Her hugs were pleasant, but strangely nervous, "We were surprised when we received your candidacy for this job."
"I just really wanted to come back. My parents wouldn't let me go just like that."
"And for good reason," the woman mutters to herself, immediately turning to face you with a warm smile, "We always want only the best for you, my girl, don't hold a grudge against us."
Her words strain you a little, but you attribute it to her slight excitement before the long-awaited vacation. After all, for as long as you can remember, Mrs. Heelshire has always been a caring and hardworking woman, she didn't know the word 'rest'.
After ten tedious minutes, Mrs. Heelshire explains to you the set of rules and your responsibilities. It seemed like she was trying in a hurry to tell you everything at once. Her eyes were constantly darting around the walls of the house.
And now you're alone. Taking care of the doll was not so difficult. Although you still didn't understand why the doll had the name of your childhood best friend. No one's parents told you what happened to Brahms, you just moved in a couple of days before his birthday. You didn't even have time to give him the gift you made with your own hands. Years later, you felt guilty about it. But now, that feeling seemed to be gone. It feels like you're finally in your place. You're home.
It happened two weeks after your arrival at the manor. As usual, you were sorting out the groceries that Malcolm brought while the man was standing next to you, leaning against the doorjamb. He was watching you carefully, talking about something. To be honest, you've noticed for a long time how ambiguously he looks at you. All those jokes, compliments, touches and glances. He was flirting with you. But you could definitely tell that he wasn't your type. Damn it, he was overconfident. But in a relationship, you wanted to 'be at the helm', you wanted a guy with character, but definitely obedient. And Malcolm definitely didn't fit that description.
"..hey, can you leave this doll after all? Let's go to my place. I'll show you a lot of interesting things," he says with a sly grin, taking a few steps closer.
"The Heelshirs left me here for a reason, I don't want to undermine their trust."
"Come on, do you really want to spend the rest of your life in a house with just this doll?" The guy purrs, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his nose in your neck. You are annoyed by his behavior and you step on Malcolm's foot with force. He hisses and quickly pulls away. "Fuck, are you stupid?"
"Watch your mouth, boy."
Malcolm tenses up. He hears rapid rustling in the walls, his eyes darting around the room.
"The hell with you," he finally gives up. Malcolm grabs the empty boxes and leaves the house, slamming the door behind him. You're relieved. He seems to be a man, but he behaves like a scared boy.
"Y/N.. Did he hurt you?" A small child's voice comes from somewhere in the hallway. You flinch a little. You knew that voice. Brahms. True, his voice was a little different in childhood, now it was quieter and plaintive. You quickly close the refrigerator and slowly walk towards the source of the sound.
"Who's here? Brahms?"
It all happened too fast. At first, you were driven by interest with a little bit of fear. In an instant, you saw a tall, broad figure towering over you by a good two heads. You were scared. You ran away, hoping to hide from a stranger. And one day you were pinned against the wall by a muscular figure.
"Y/N, don't be afraid... I didn't mean to scare you." A child's voice mumbles plaintively. You look into those hazel eyes and your heart sinks.
"Brahms?" In response, the man only reaches out to your face, gently caressing your cheek.
"Now I've won." His voice changes. Instead of a child's voice, a low, hoarse voice now caresses your ears. You feel electricity running down your spine, you instinctively squeeze your hips.
Your hands reach for the porcelain mask, but Brahms abruptly pulls away. He shakes his head negatively. He didn't want you to see his face. He doesn't want you to be scared. He doesn't want you to leave him like the others.
"Come on, Brahms. You're a good boy. Didn't you love kissing?" You speak with a slight smile. A long-drawn-out whine comes from under the mask. He nods briefly. You lift the edge of the mask, covering his hot lips with your own. Brahms's movements are fast and assertive, he bites your lips, squeezing your waist in his hands. He missed you so much.
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bornonthesavage · 11 months
Text
It was an undeniable fact that Steve was lucky. He had been told it more times than he could count, from all sorts of people, so it must be true. His friends at school told him he was lucky that he had no one at home to give him a bedtime or make him eat vegetables. The housekeeper that came to bring him groceries and to clean once a week told him he was so lucky to live in such a nice house. Ever since he could remember, his parents had told him that he was lucky to be born to an upper-class family. And when others were around, Steve kept up the façade. He could pretend that he agreed, with bright smiles and boastful words. But in the late hours of the night, when he was all alone in that big house, lucky wasn’t the word he thought about. No, what Steve really was, was lonely.
Even at twelve years old, Steve was pretty sure it wasn’t normal for his parents to leave him alone for up to a month at a time. When he was young, they had hired nannies to care for him while they were away. That hadn’t been great either, but at least there had been someone else in the house with him. Someone to talk to and watch TV with and to make dinner. Then, on Steve’s twelfth birthday, his parents had told him he was old enough to look after himself while they were away. They trusted him to not burn down the house, at least. That had been six months ago.
Now, six months later, Steve sat alone in his living room. His parents had left earlier in the week, promising to be home before the end of the month and told him to call if he needed anything. He never called. What would be the point? It wasn’t like they would come home. No, if he needed something, he would figure it out on his own.
Steve pulled his knees up to tuck against his chest as he sat on the couch, watching a rerun of Gilligan’s Island. A half-eaten bowl of popcorn sat on the coffee table along with an empty coke can. He had heated up a bowl of chicken noodle soup for dinner, which he’d eaten with crushed up saltine crackers, but he always found himself craving a snack before bed. It was almost ten o’clock, but he wasn’t yet tired.  
When the episode ended, Steve stood and began to make his way toward the kitchen. He could go for one more coke before bed. But before he even made it out of the living room, a loud clatter from the back yard made him freeze. He turned, creeping slowly toward the glass door that overlooked the pool. It had sounded like it came from the shed, which sat beyond the pool deck, nestled almost among the trees. His hand shook as he reached up to flip on the back light. A part of him was convinced he would see a horrible monster racing up his yard toward the house, ready to devour him. But that was ridiculous. There was no such thing as monsters.
The yard was completely empty, the pool glowing an eerie green in the night. Steve scanned the perimeter until his eyes landed on the shed. Though it was dark, it looked as if the door was slightly ajar. Now, Steve knew the sensible thing to do was to ignore it until morning. But then he remembered that Kasie Jones, the girl who sat in front of him in math class, had found an injured mother cat behind her house just one month earlier. It was Springtime, she had said, which meant lots of animals would be having babies. If she hadn’t found them, the mother cat and her babies could have died. Steve couldn’t live with being responsible for that.
So, with only a mild amount of fear, he grabbed a flashlight from the kitchen drawer and slid open the glass door. It was early April, so while the days had grown warm, the nights still held a bit of a chill. Steve slid on his outdoor sandals and began to make his way across the yard. Everything was quiet now, except for the crickets. He approached the shed, tilting his head to see if he could hear any meowing. There was nothing.
It wasn’t until he was directly outside the shed that real fear began to prickle at the back of his neck once more. He was far enough from the house that if anything burst out and took chase, he likely wouldn’t make it back without getting caught. Steve took a deep breath and remembered what his dad was always telling him.
“Be a man. Real men don’t shake like little babies.”
Right. Be a man. He stepped forward and grabbed the edge of the door, which had been swaying slightly in the wind, and yanked it open. There wasn’t much inside the shed, just pool equipment and a few yard tools. Steve leaned inside, casting his light around for any sign of an injured cat. He took a step inside, letting the door swing partially shut behind him. The light caught on random items as he scanned. An old broken truck from when he was little, the pool noodles he liked to use when the weather was warm enough, a leaf blower, a pair of human eyes.
Steve screamed, his heart slamming up into his throat as he stumbled backward and dropped the flashlight. His back hit the wall and he fell, his legs giving out with the sheer force of terror he felt in that moment. There was someone else in the shed with him, someone curled up beneath the work bench on the far wall. The flashlight had rolled away from him, its beam pointed in the wrong direction for him to see. Steve glanced at the door, wondering how quickly he’d be grabbed if he made any sudden movements. A quiet voice spoke from the shadows.
“H-hey. It’s alright. You don’t have to be afraid. I’m not going to hurt you.”
That made Steve pause. Whoever it was sounded young, probably close to his age, and they also sound afraid. But what was another kid doing in his shed at night? Steve took a moment to let his heart rate slow before speaking again.
“Who are you? What are you doing here?”
For a few seconds it was silent, but then he spoke again. “Eddie. My name is Eddie. I was… I was just looking for a safe place to sleep.”
“To sleep?” Steve asked, furrowing his brow. “Why would you want to sleep in this dingy old shed? There are like, a hundred spiders in here, I’m pretty sure.”
He heard the other boy shift around a bit. “It’s better than outside.”
Well, maybe that was true, but it still didn’t explain much. Slowly, Steve moved onto his knees and crawled forward to grab his flashlight. This put him closer to the other boy, with Steve knelt in the middle of the small room. He raised the light until it fell on the other’s face.
Steve had been right that he seemed to be around his age. With dark curls that fell around his ears and big, pretty brown eyes, Eddie didn’t look like much of a threat at all. In fact, he seemed to be in bad shape. There were dark circles beneath his eyes and his cheeks looked a bit sunken in, as if he hadn’t eaten in a while. His knees were tucked up against his chest, but Steve could tell the jeans he wore were dirty and tattered.  
“Are you homeless?” Which, okay, maybe that was a rude thing to ask, but Steve thought it was a fair question.
Eddie looked away, his brows lowering slightly. “I’m- I mean… Yeah, I guess so.”
Steve tilted his head. “Where are your parents?”
Something in Eddie’s expression became tight, before crumbling. “They’re dead. My mother died a year ago, my father just last month.”
“Shit,” Steve mumbled. That really sucked. He had never met someone who had lost both their parents. “Do you not have any other family?”
Eddie shook his head. “It’s just me.”
“Oh.” Steve shifted off his knees so he could cross his legs. “But, there are places you can go, aren’t there? Like, an orphanage or something? I could probably call the police and they could—”
“No!” Eddie snapped, his eyes darting up to Steve’s. “No, please, nobody can know about me.”
Steve frowned. That was definitely an odd reaction. “Why? Are you some sort of criminal?”
Eddie snorted, the corner of his lips twitching, as if he found that amusing. “No, not really.”
“Not really? Either you are or you aren’t.”
“I’m not,” Eddie insisted. “I’ve never hurt anybody that wasn’t trying to hurt me. But… There are people. Bad people, who would hurt me if they ever found me. So, I’ll leave if you want me to, but you can’t tell anyone about me.”
Steve stared at the other boy. His eyes were wide and serious, his mouth set into a hard line that told Steve he wasn’t joking. Whatever this kid was mixed up in was dangerous, he could tell that much. It would be smart for Steve to tell him to get lost, to find somewhere else to hide out. But, still. He didn’t want him to just leave.
“Where would you go? If I told you to leave, I mean.”
Eddie let out a breath, his shoulders dropping. “I don’t know. Maybe someone else’s shed. Maybe try and make my way to Indianapolis.”
Steve fiddled with his hands. “That sounds dangerous. You can’t go off to the city all by yourself. You’re just a kid, like me.”
A small smile tugged at the corner of Eddie’s lips. “Not just like you. I can take care of myself.”
That struck Steve somewhere in his chest, the sentiment all too familiar. “Yeah, so can I, but that doesn’t mean you should have to. You should have someone to look after you.”
Eddie tilted his head, his eyes searching Steve’s face. “Are you always alone?”
“What? How- how do you know that?”
“Oh, um,” Eddie averted his eyes, suddenly looking a little bit guilty. “I’ve been here for a few days. I wasn’t trying to spy on you, but I saw that it’s just you in the house. Nobody else ever came or went, but you must have parents, right?”
Steve huffed and rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I have parents. They just… they go out of town a lot for business. And I can’t go with them, because they don’t need a kid running around while they do work. But, it’s like, fine. I have the house all to myself, and I don’t have a bedtime, and I can eat whatever I want.”
Unlike all the other times Steve had told another kid this, Eddie didn’t look all that impressed. If anything, he looked sad. Which… was stupid. So stupid. Steve was lucky. He had everything he could ever want. He didn’t need some orphan, who clearly didn’t have anything this nice, feeling sorry for him.
Eddie rested his chin on his knees. “That sounds really lonely.”
A heavy pit settled in Steve stomach. Nobody else had ever acknowledged that before, and he didn’t really know what to do with it. His first instinct was to defend his parents, to tell Eddie that it was fine, and he didn’t know what he was talking about. But another part of Steve, a stronger part, felt an overwhelming sense of relief. It settled something inside Steve, hearing someone else say the words he’d been keeping locked inside for so long. It was validating.
Slowly, he nodded. “Yeah, it can be. But, that’s just the way it is.”
Eddie didn’t look convinced. He opened his mouth, as if to say something, but before he could, a violent shudder shook his whole body. Steve’s eyes wide at the look of pain that crossed Eddie’s face and he hesitantly reached out a hand. Only, that seemed to make it worse, as Eddie flinched away from his touch.
“No, don’t come closer!” Eddie warned. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
Steve furrowed his brow. “Hurt me? Why would you hurt me?”
“No, I don’t want to, but… I haven’t eaten in a week. I’m afraid I won’t be able to control myself.”
A week? What the hell? That was way too long for a person to go without food! No wonder Eddie looked so sickly. He was starving to death.
“Hey, if you’re hungry, come inside with me. I can get you something to eat, no problem!”
But Eddie only shook his head, his face still pained. “No, Steve, it’s not… It’s not that simple. There’s nothing in your house I can eat. Well, nothing that I’ll allow myself to have.”
“What are you talking about?”
A look of resignation came over Eddie’s face. “Steve… I’m not- I’m not normal. You should leave. You don’t want me to come into your house with you.”
He really wasn’t making any sense now. Did Eddie think that just because he was homeless and without parents, he was undeserving of kindness? That was ridiculous. If anything, it made Steve want to help him even more. “Uh, yeah, I do. That’s why I invited you.”
His arms tightened around his legs, as if he were protecting himself. “You shouldn’t do that.”
“Do what?”
Eddie’s eyes flashed up to meet Steve’s. “Invite random strangers into your home. It’s dangerous.”
Steve snorted. “I don’t think you’re dangerous, Eddie. You look one minute from keeling over.”
“Yeah,” he said, letting out a humorless laugh. “And that makes it even worse.”
Alright, Steve was starting to grow tired of arguing about this. “Dude, come on. You have to eat something.”
Eddie made a little sound, like a whimper in the back of his throat, and closed his eyes. “If you knew the truth about me, you wouldn’t say that. If you knew the truth, you would run away. Or maybe even try to hurt me.”
“Whoa, hey, no. Eddie, I promise I won’t hurt you. I’m just trying to help.”
Outside the shed, it sounded like the wind began to pick up as the structure creaked ominously. Steve pulled his jacket more firmly around himself and couldn’t help but think that Eddie’s thin hoodie didn’t seem warm enough. Maybe Steve could give him some of his clothes. It’s not like his parents would ever notice. The look Eddie gave him when he opened his eyes was filled with sorrow.
“Yeah, I know. You seem really nice, Steve. And I’m afraid that if I come with you, I’ll hurt you without meaning to, and then I’ll be a monster, which I don’t want to be.”
Steve was trying to understand, he really was. People called him stupid sometimes, which he didn’t really agree with, but now he was struggling to follow what Eddie was saying. How could Eddie hurt him without meaning to?
“Eddie, I don’t understand. Please, you can tell me the truth. I won’t run away, I promise.”
Eddie shook his head, casting his big eyes down. “You shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“Hey, look at me.” He waited until Eddie did, then scooted forward on his knees. Slowly, without making any sudden movement, he held up his pinky. “I pinky promise I won’t leave you. And I always keep my pinky promises.”
A hesitant smile grew on Eddie’s face, though he still seemed extremely uncertain. Finally, after what felt like forever, Eddie brought his pinky up and wrapped it around Steve’s. It was slightly shocking, just how cold Eddie was. Like his skin was just a thin layer of ice, molded around bones. That couldn’t be good. Steve really needed to get him inside. Before he could pull away, Eddie spoke.
“And I promise to do my very best not to hurt you.”
Steve grinned. “Well, there you go. So, go on then. Tell me what the problem is.”
Eddie sighed, tucking his bottom lip between his teeth. “Okay, I guess I might as well. I don’t have anything else to lose. Um, have you… have you heard of vampires?”
“Vampires?” Steve asked, scrunching up his nose. “What, like Dracula? Or The Count on Sesame Street?”
Eddie snorted and rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I mean sort of. But also, no. What if… what if vampires were real?”
Steve narrowed his eyes. “I don’t understand. Vampires aren’t real, so what does that have to do with anything?”
A look of frustration crossed Eddie’s face. “Steve. I’m trying to tell you. Vampires are real. I know, because I am one.”
For several seconds, Steve didn’t speak. The only sound to be heard was the shifting of trees outside and the quiet breathing of the two boys. Finally, Steve let out a laugh.
“Yeah, right, okay. Look, I don’t know why you don’t want to tell me—”
“Steve—”
“But it’s fine, I guess. You don’t have to trust me, I guess.”
“Steve, I am telling you the truth! See, this is another reason I didn’t want to tell you. Humans never believe in anything beyond what they see in the daylight.”
“Oh, come on,” Steve said, dropping back off his knees to sit on his butt. “I get it, you’re trying to prank me, for whatever reason. But I can’t help you unless I know the truth. Or at least until you tell me what the real problem is. You’re not a vampire.”
“I am!” Eddie insisted, the corners of his lips turning down in a frown. “Do you want me to prove it to you?”
At this point, Steve was getting a little bit annoyed. The joke wasn’t that funny. He was cold, and the dirt on the cement floor was digging into his backside, and he really just wanted to get back inside. So, with a jeering smirk, he leaned forward.
“Yeah, sure, go ahead. Prove that you’re a vampire.”
Eddie didn’t move at first, just continued to stare at Steve with his too big eyes. It was a little unnerving, to be honest, the way he didn’t seem to blink or even move. And then, in a flash of movement too fast to be humanly possible, Eddie shot forward. Steve flinched at the unexpected movement, falling back onto his elbows with a small shout of surprise. He half expected to be attacked, to maybe feel Eddie’s hand around his throat or a fist against his cheek. But it never came.
Slowly, Steve opened his eyes. Only, Eddie was nowhere to be seen. The spot beneath the bench was empty, and when Steve looked around, he didn’t see Eddie anywhere. Had he slipped out the door and run away? Why? Steve didn’t understand. But then, Eddie spoke.
“Steve. I’m up here.”
A chill ran down Steve’s back, some primal part of him that had been dormant waking up at hearing the voice from above. Slowly, Steve tilted his head back. What he saw defied all explanation. Eddie was on the ceiling. He was crouched upside down, his hands gripping the wood beam and his feet planted flat on the roof. Eddie blinked down at him, his hair dangling away from his face.
Steve opened his mouth to scream, a natural response he thought. But before he could utter a sound, Eddie was off the ceiling. He landed on top of Steve, his hand pressed firm to his mouth to stop any sound from escaping and his other hand holding Steve to the ground. For a wiry looking kid, he was sure strong.
“Please, Steve, don’t scream,” Eddie begged, his wide eyes earnest. “I promised not to hurt you, and I won’t. You’re safe with me, okay?”
For a few seconds, all Steve could do was stare up at him. He shouldn’t believe him, logically he knew that. Vampires drank blood, human blood, which Steve had. But if Eddie had wanted to hurt him, surely, he would have already. He could even do it right now. Steve was trapped beneath him, his movement completely restricted. So, slowly, Steve nodded. Eddie chewed his lip, before removing his hand. Steve took a few deep breaths, trying to calm his racing heart.
“Holy crap. You’re like, a real vampire?”
Eddie nodded, still looking concerned. “Yeah, pretty much.”
“Wow. How long have you been a vampire for?”
“Uh, my whole life?” Eddie said with a chuckle.
Steve frowned. “Wait, what? But I thought vampires were made by being bitten.”
Eddie finally climbed off Steve, sitting cross legged in front of him while Steve sat up and matched his position. “Yeah, some. Some vampires are humans who were turned. But others, like me, were born as vampires. Both of my parents were vampires, and they had me.”
Huh. Steve had never heard of anything like that before. “But what about, like, mirrors and blood drinking and stuff?”
“Eh, I mean, most of the stuff humans know about vampires was made up by them. Except for the blood drinking, that’s true.”
“What about sunlight?”
Eddie scrunched up his nose. “Well, I won’t burst into flames if I’m exposed to it. But it does sting my skin and hurt my eyes, so I avoid it if possible.”
Steve nodded, taking that it. “So, that’s why you’re hiding out here in my shed?”
Eddie nodded.
“Hmm, ok. Well, you know, you might be more comfortable inside the house.”
“You… would invite me into your house? Even knowing what I am?”
Steve shrugged. “Yeah, why not? I believe that you won’t hurt me, and it doesn’t sound like you have anywhere else to go. Plus, I’m getting pretty cold.”
He pushed himself to his feet and held his hand out for Eddie, who hesitated. He looked unsure, and maybe a little bit afraid, though Steve couldn’t imagine of what. It wasn’t like he was going to hurt Eddie. When Eddie didn’t immediately take his hand, Steve gave it a shake.
“Come on. It’s okay.”
Finally, Eddie reached up and took it. Steve hoisted him up, then still holding his hand, led him out of the shed. Eddie looked around as they crossed the yard, as if afraid someone was going to pop out and do a sneak attack. They got to the sliding glass door and Steve pushed it open, stepping into the wonderfully warm living room. He tried to pull Eddie in after him, but the other boy hesitated on the threshold.
“What’s wrong?”
“Are you sure? Are you sure you want to invite me in? Once you do, you can’t take it back.”
Steve sighed. “Eddie, I don’t understand. You promised you won’t hurt me, and I’m not going to hurt you, so what’s the problem?”
Eddie chewed on his bottom lip. “I’m afraid I won’t be able to help myself. It’s just… I’m so hungry. I haven’t eaten anything in almost a week, and you… you smell really good. And I don’t want to hurt you, I promise. But what if I lose control?”
Steve blinked a few times. Oh. He hadn’t really considered that. “And… you need to drink blood? That’s all you eat?”
Timidly, Eddie nodded.
“Right. Okay. Well, maybe I could give you a little bit of my blood, just to hold you over, and then—”
“No!” Eddie shouted, ripping his hand out of Steve’s. “No, Steve, please don’t offer me that. I’m too hungry, I know I won’t be able to stop once I’ve started. I’ll kill you, and then… then I really will be a monster.”
Steve chewed his lip, wavering in the doorway. “What do you normally do when you’re hungry?”
“I hunt animals, usually. But… I waited too long. I’m too weak to catch anything on my own now.”
Right. That made sense. Steve was a little relieved to hear that Eddie usually hunted animals. If he could only drink human blood, they would definitely be in a bit of a pickle.
“Okay, here’s the plan,” he said, “Tonight, you’ll come in and sleep somewhere cozy. You won’t kill me or try to drink my blood. Tomorrow I’ll skip school and go to the butcher in town. I know they stock cow blood, because my nana bought some a few years ago to make this really gross pudding.”
Eddie’s eyes went wide, his mouth falling open slightly. “You’d do that? You’d really go out of your way to help me?”
Steve grinned wide, taking his hand once more. “Of course! We’re both on our own right now, so we should look after each other, shouldn’t we? And my parents left me plenty of money for snacks and stuff, so they won’t even notice if I use it for something else.”
There was something warring in Eddie’s big brown eyes, a well of emotion that Steve couldn’t guess at. All he knew was that he wanted to help Eddie, and so he was going to. When Eddie still didn’t make any move to come inside, Steve tugged gently on his hand.
“Come on. I’m inviting you inside. You’ll be okay.”
Eddie took a deep breath, then nodded, as though coming to a decision. Hesitantly, he stepped forward, bringing one foot over the threshold. He stared down at his foot, as if half expecting it to burst into flames. Could that happen? Steve really hoped not. Finally, Eddie brought his other foot inside. Steve smiled, nodding encouragingly.
“See, that wasn’t so hard.”
He slid the glass door shut behind them and locked it before closing the curtains. Eddie had wandered a few more paces in, standing awkwardly in the middle of the living room. His baggy sweatshirt hung loosely from his limbs, and in the light, Steve could see smudges of dirt on the other boys face. It must have been a long time since he’d had a bath.
“Do you want to use my shower before bed?”
Eddie glanced at him over his shoulder, his brow furrowing. “Are you saying I stink?”
“What? No! No, I wouldn’t say that, I promise! It’s just—”
He stopped when he saw Eddie chuckling. “I’m only joking. I do smell. That’s what happens when you live in the woods for a couple weeks.”
Steve huffed and rolled his eyes. “Ha ha, very funny. Come on, follow me.”
He shut off the tv as they passed it by before switching off the lights and leading Eddie to the stairs. The other boy followed close behind, and when Steve turned to look at him, saw he was taking everything in.
“This place is like a castle,” Eddie murmured.
“Eh, not really. Castle’s have a lot more people in them. It’s just me here.”
“Why don’t your parents want to live here?”
“They do!” Steve said, defensive. “They do live here. They just… go on a lot of business trips. They’re super busy.”
Eddie hummed, not commenting on it any further, which Steve was grateful for. He didn’t want to talk about his parents. All that ever did was make him sad, and he wasn’t in the mood to feel sad. He had a vampire in his house. A vampire who might want to be his friend. He couldn’t entirely wrap his head around it.
They reached the second landing and Steve led Eddie down the hall to his room. He flicked on the light and moved to sit on the bed, watching Eddie as he looked around the room. For some reason, the corners of Eddie’s mouth turned down in a frown.
“What, you don’t like my room?”
Eddie shrugged, walking to stand beside his dresser with the ribbons he’d won at his school’s field day. “It’s not very… you, is it?”
“What do you mean.”
“I don’t know. Where are the pictures? The posters of your favorite bands and movies? Where’s the mess?”
Steve looked around, forcing himself to see his room from someone else’s perspective. “My mom doesn’t like messes. And I just, I don’t know, haven’t really thought about adding anything to the walls.
Eddie hummed again. “Well, you should. Give this checkered monstrosity a little life.”
“Hey, it’s not that bad.”
“It sort of is. Let me guess, your mom picked it out?”
Steve rolled his eyes. Eddie sure was a lot sassier now that he’d come inside. Hopefully that meant he felt comfortable. “Yeah, so? I don’t mind it, so why does it matter?”
Eddie held up his hands. “Hey, as long as you like it.”
“Right. Well, if you want to take a shower, it’s right through that door,” he said, motioning to his on-suite. “I’ll put a towel and some pajamas you can borrow on the counter for when you get out.”
“Yeah, ok, cool.”
Eddie stepped into the bathroom and closed the door behind him, leaving Steve alone to sit on his bed. Right, this was totally normal and okay. He had a vampire in his house, one that was apparently his age and who had nowhere else to go. If his parents found out, they’d flip. Luckily, they weren’t home, so there was no need to worry about that. Unless… well, unless Eddie decided he wanted to stay. Surely being here would be better than going to the city alone, to ask a bunch of creepy older vampires if he could live with them. That sounded pretty terrifying, if you asked Steve.
Because really, what could they have that Steve didn’t? Did they have a twenty-seven-inch screen tv? No, he doubted it. Would they have a pool, or a whole forest behind their house for privacy? In the city? Yeah, he didn’t think so. Which, okay, maybe he was getting ahead of himself. He had just met Eddie, he couldn’t ask him to stay with him. Even if he wanted to.
It would be pretty cool to have someone else his age who lived in his house, though. Someone who wouldn’t leave on trips for most of the month. Someone he could watch tv with and play games with and stay up talking to. It would be like having a live in friend. That sounded… that sounded really nice.
Steve was jolted from his thoughts at the sound of something clattering in the shower.
“Sorry!” Eddie shouted. “Dropped the shampoo.”
Ah, right, he needed to get Eddie a towel and some clothes. He grabbed one of his fluffiest towels from the cupboard and then took out his second favorite set of pajamas. He’d gotten them from his grandma last Christmas, and they had Snoopy on them. Trying to be as quiet as he could, he placed the items on the bathroom counter before scurrying out again.
The water turned off a few minutes later. Steve climbed into bed to wait, pulling the blankets up and leaving his bedside lamp on. The door opened and Eddie stepped out. Despite being a year older than Steve, the pajamas still hung a little loose on him. His dark curls dripped on his shoulders as he looked around.
When he spoke, he sounded unsure. “So, um, is there another bed I can take? Or I can lay on the floor if you want, I don’t mind.”
Steve scrunched up his nose. “What? I’m not going to make you sleep on the floor. My bed is plenty big, just sleep with me.”
Eddie hesitated, but after it became clear that Steve was serious, made his way to the other side of the bed. “You really don’t mind sleeping next to me? Even knowing what I am?”
“I already told you I don’t. But, I mean, if it’ll be a problem for you, you don’t have to.”
“No, it’s just, I probably won’t sleep. I usually sleep during the day, so I’ll probably sit here until I feel tired. Which, yeah, will probably be when you’re waking up.”
“Oh.” Steve hadn’t considered that. “Right. Well, you can go downstairs and watch tv if you want. I’ve got lots of movies.”
Eddie bit his lip, the unnatural sharpness to his fangs all the more obvious in the lowlight of the bedroom. “Actually, if you don’t mind, I think I’ll just lay here with you. I think I’ll feel too weird, sitting downstairs by myself.”
Steve wouldn’t admit it out loud, but that was secretly what he’d been hoping Eddie would do. He’d been to his fair share of sleepovers, and while he loved a lot of different aspects of them, his favorite was falling asleep next to another person. The feeling of closeness, of safety, that being close to another person brought… there wasn’t really anything else like it. So, Steve wasted no time in pulling back the blanket on Eddie’s side of the bed and urging him to climb in. Only once they were both laying down, with only a few inches between them, did Steve finally shut off the light.
It was late, way later that Steve normally went to bed on a school night. At least he’d already decided he wouldn’t be going into school tomorrow. He would still wake up early, so that he had enough time to bike down to the butcher and get back before Eddie woke up. Despite all the excitement of having a new vampire friend, Steve felt the unavoidable pull of sleep as he snuggled further into his blankets. Before he could drift off, however, Eddie’s voice came from right beside his ear.
“Steve?”
He blinked an eye open, unable to make out the shape of the other boy, having closed the curtains to protect Eddie from the early morning sun. “Hmm?”
For a few seconds, it was quiet. Steve almost wondered if he’d imagined Eddie’s voice, until the other boy spoke again. “Thank you.”
“For what?” he murmured.
“For helping me. For letting me into your house. For… for just being a good person. I don’t know very many off those.”
Steve hummed, smiling sleepily. “Me either. I guess we’ll just have to be good to each other.”
A puff of breath ghosted across Steve’s cheek, leading him to believe Eddie was even closer than he’d thought. He could probably see Steve perfectly, with his superior vampire vision. The thought should scare him. It didn’t.
“Yeah,” Eddie said quietly. “I guess we will.”
Steve wasn’t sure if he said anything else after that, as he drifted off. But when he dreamed of a creature hiding beneath his bed that night, it wasn’t a nightmare. Because he knew, despite what the movies told him, that this monster wouldn’t hurt him.
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First things first Happy New Year, dear 🫶🏻✨️✨️
Since you're writing for Spencer Reid, may I suggest something that goes along the festive date?
I was thinking of unfinished business between the reader and Spencer, and when the whole team (who is suspicious about you both) stays at someone's place to celebrate the new year, you two end up drinking a little too much (nothing that makes you incapable of giving consent nor forgetting what happened) and what's just a cuddle session ends up with both tangled in the bedsheets, trying your best to keep the noise down.
<3
hii bby!! happy new year to you too lovie <33 love love love it🫠 thank you for requesting, hope you like it💌
NEW YEAR’S KISS.
spencer reid x fem!reader
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word count. 531
warnings. 18+ only!! pinv, soft lovey dovey sex, readers roommate is home. mdni
For this New Year's Eve, you decided to keep it simple. 
Rather than celebrating at Rossi's like every year, you and Spencer opted for a quiet evening at yours - deciding that you wanted to drink cheap wine and cuddle on the couch as you see the New Year in. It was the only way you wanted to spend the occasion, with the only person you wanted to be with when the clock strikes twelve.
However, things don't always go as planned. 
Your roommate changed plans an hour before Spencer's arrival, and instead of going out to a bar, she decided to stay home - inviting a group of friends over for drinks and board games. 
You and your special friend were still figuring things out, everything new and foreign to the both of you, so you wanted to keep your situation private - at least, until you could put a name on it. Inevitably meaning, you and Spencer were cast away to your room for the night.
You were in your dimly lit room, candlelight flickering on your nightstand, warmth casting a green hue through the half-empty bottle of wine. Spencer was hovering atop - his thin frame slotted between your spread thighs, your ankles crossed over his lower back. One of his hands nestled on the side of your face, carefully holding your cheek in his palm, the other anchored beside your head - elbow resting by your shoulder. His lips merely shadow yours, soft murmurs falling past each of your lips as he slowly winds his hips into you - cock rubbing against your insides ever so perfectly.
You extend your hands up to his face, fingers grazing the sides of his ears as you reach for his hair. You carefully comb through his soft curls, raking the stray hairs back, keeping your eyes locked on his pretty hazels as he continues to knock the air out of your lungs.
"Spence," you coo, lips parting as your head falls back into the pillow behind. "Gotta be quieter— they're next door."
"I know," he murmurs, his voice hoarse. "You're just too beautiful."
You bashfully smile up at him, brows knitting and eyes softening, your features growing pliant under his attention. You brush over his lips, kissing him soft and sweet, letting your strangled whines slip - your faint moans muffling against his tongue.
His thrusts remain leisured, winding into you unrushed - working into you like he had all the time in the world. The curve of his cock hitting all the right spots, veins grazing the ridges of your walls so nicely. No one had ever made you feel as good as you did right now - no one had ever taken the time to ensure your pleasure. And whenever you were with Spencer, that was always his main priority. 
Spending the night with Spencer in your sheets is probably the best end to your year, and it just might be marked as your new favourite holiday. As the fireworks set off around your street, indicating the arrival of the New Year, you reach up to brush your lips over his, giving him the first kiss of 2024.
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thesunisatangerine · 9 months
Text
against all odds (to wait for you is all i can do) – part one
alexia putellas x photojournalist!reader
status: completed
(a/n in the tags) [parts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve]
word count: 1.1k
The thing was, you didn’t plan on getting laid tonight. 
After a couple of days trying to settle in at Barcelona and looking for your lost luggage, all you wanted to do was to finally start your vacation. You just wanted to relax and experiencing the night life in Barcelona was definitely a good way to officially kick it off. 
So there you were at the bar of an (apparently) exclusive night club in the city–the location was emailed to you by Derek with a VIP pass and a note that said, ‘have fun ;)’–nursing your second, half-empty glass of mojito, the speakers blasting rhythmic reggaeton music, when a woman slid into the space next to you, cool and confident with the way she leaned on her elbows against the counter as she gave the bartender her order in smooth spanish, “A gin rickey, please.”
The woman looked to be several years older than you–and taller, too, even with your heels on–and maybe it was the alcohol or the proximity but there was no stopping yourself from openly admiring her. Her black, cropped top and her tight, high-rise pants revealed perfectly broad shoulders and toned arms, as well as the taught lines of her stomach. When your eyes travelled back to her face, you found her looking at you with a raised brow and immediately, your cheeks warmed. The fact that you were gawking shamelessly and got caught doing so… just wow.
Words of apology were already on your tongue but the curves of her lips were mesmerising, the elegant slope of her brows distracting, and those eyes… the depth in them threatened to drown you that all coherent thought deserted you. 
“Wow,” you breathed out.
“Excuse me?” Came the bemused question, an instant slap to the face that sobered you up immediately. 
“I’m so–I’m sorry, that’s what I meant to say. I’m–” You palmed a hand over your face as you began but a small chuckle stopped you halfway. You risked a peek through your fingers and saw the woman with her lips to the glass, something akin to a teasing smirk on her face while she remained leaning on the counter by her hip. 
“You’re not from around here, are you?” The woman asked as she took a sip from her drink.
Not really the question you were expecting but you’d rather take a reprieve over a disaster. And at that, you smiled sheepishly at her. “Is it that obvious?”
“Hmm, no, not really. Your slight accent gave you away but your Spanish is impressive.”
“I’m still working on losing it but I’ll take that as a win. I’m assuming you’re from around here?”
“My home town is about an hour away outside of the city but I stay here most of the time for work.”
“That must be nice, being close to home.” Feeling more at ease now, you sipped at your drink. The woman did the same. Then you continued. “So, what do you do?”
For a moment there was nothing but music and chatter as the woman regarded you with an unreadable expression. Her eyes glinted–with what exactly? curiosity?–her head cocked slightly to the side. Then she sipped at her drink again. Did you say something offensive? you wondered.
“I work between the sport stadiums. And you? Where is home and what brings you to Barcelona?” 
It was clear from the vagueness of her answer that the stranger didn’t want to talk about her job and it didn’t help your growing interest for her. You wanted to ask her about further details but the dismissive tone with which she answered made you hold your tongue and her question, anyway, made you pause as you pondered to answer.
As an orphan who lived a few years in the system, the subject of where home was had always been a sore spot for you even if the stranger didn’t mean anything deeper by it. In some sense, your adoptive mom was home but there was always a part of you that longed for… something.  But, of course, you couldn’t bring that up right now especially to someone you just met. So you just told her where you were from, that you were on vacation, and that you work as a photojournalist for a press agency you helped establish. Something in your answer must had piqued the woman’s interest because her brows shot up.
“Which branch do you work in?”
“Spot news. But I’ve been meaning to expand my portfolio and get into another branch. Maybe try sports or portrait?”
The woman hummed in appreciation. “Any sports in particular? Wait, do you even like sports?”
“I honestly know close to nothing so I haven’t made a decision yet, but it will definitely be women’s sports,” you replied. She nodded and sipped at her drink again, never breaking her gaze from yours and you felt your cheeks warm again. Those eyes… they were dangerous; they lit up every nerve in your body and it felt good. You continued. “What about you? Are you much of a sports person?”
And to your total bafflement, the woman beamed at you, radiant and glowing, dimples in her cheeks as mirth shone in her eyes.
“What?” you asked, a bit nervous and at somewhat of a loss. 
The stranger let out a small chuckle, shook her head slightly as she rubbed the bridge of her nose, an attempt to hide her smile. “Nothing, nothing. And yeah, I’m a big sports fan. Then a beat passed before she continued, “you ever thought of covering women’s football? There are plenty of matches happening in the domestic leagues right now.”
“Maybe I will,” you hummed, mulling it over. It sounded good actually. And then you asked, “what else do you suggest for someone to do in Barcelona?”
The woman downed her remaining drink and placed the empty glass on the counter. Before you knew it, you could feel the warmth of her breath against your ear and you shivered when she purred. “Dance, of course.”And then she was holding your hand, pulling you off of the stool you were on, and began dragging you to the direction of the dance floor. 
All at once, warmth encompassed you: the crowd immediately swallowed you both, bodies pressed on you but the heat that emanated from the woman before you was the sole beacon for your attention. She had a loose arm around your waist and as the both of you danced to the music, you took that opportunity to wrap your arms around her neck and pulled her closer. She slowed down and she still had enough height on you that she had to lower her head.
“I never caught your name,” you spoke into her ear. 
“I’m Ale,” she replied. She pulled back to smile down at you. And then, she kissed you. 
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elliesbelle · 6 months
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nobody compares to you
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chapter 12
pairing: ellie x reader
synopsis: you're in your junior year of college and at a party, you run into the girl who broke your heart: ellie williams. despite the time it took to reset your life, will you risk a broken heart again for her?
content warnings: modern college au, cursing, angst, dealer!ellie, mentions of alcohol, descriptions of anxiety and anxiety attacks, allusions to toxic parents, description of murder (in a joking fashion), flashback scene, some descriptions from ellie's POV, descriptions of marijuana and marijuana usage, allusions to toxic ex-friends, slightly sexual behaviour, minors do not interact
word count: 9.2k
chapters: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen
series masterlist
my masterlist
i have a ko-if if you like my work so much that you feel compelled to tip me ♡︎
the "nobody compares to you" spotify playlist
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“Oh, I don’t know, Abs…” 
“Hey, like I said, no pressure at all.” 
You’re sprawled out on your bed with your homework spread out on your sheets which you’ve completely abandoned as you’d spent the last half hour chatting on the phone with Abby. 
It’s been exactly four days since your night out with her and her friends at the lesbian bar, Bow and Arrow. Exactly four days since unexpectedly you ran into your ex-fling from freshman year, Adriana. Exactly four days since you drunkenly rejected Abby’s sudden and attempted kiss. Exactly four days since you visited the same alleyway where you had your first kiss with Ellie Williams. 
Being the perfect gentlemanwoman that she always was, Abby had insisted on taking you home herself that night. You’d reassured her that you could easily order a rideshare service to take you home if needed, but she argued that it was her fault that you had tequila in your system in the first place and that she’d feel much more at ease if she definitively saw you enter the front door of your apartment with her own two eyes. Her thoughtfulness and persistence won out in the end, and at around 2 A.M., she respectfully greeted you good night as you tipsily crossed the threshold of your apartment. 
As you waved her goodbye, a sinking sense of shame settled at the seat of your stomach. Despite your brush-off to her advances, Abby remained completely sweet and amicable for the rest of the night. Her demeanour didn’t seem to change, though there were no more attempts to steal another kiss from you again. The feeling of remorse soberly persisted into the following day, and you’d remorsefully texted Abby the morning after to offer lengthy sorries for your rejection. Ever a well-mannered woman of honour, she easily accepted your many apologies and, in turn, apologized for attempting to kiss you while neither of you was completely sober. Your “friendship” with Abby remained untainted, much to your relief. 
But now, exactly four days later, you’ve been once again placed in yet another uncomfortable predicament.  Abby had just invited you out to dinner with her that following Friday night at a restaurant called Orchards. Though never having actually set foot in the place, you’d seen just in passing how extravagant and fancy the establishment was. It was never a restaurant you considered ever patronizing, and as Abby attempts to persuade you to accompany her for dinner, you feel your entire body begin to react in complete hysteria. You try to convince yourself that your rapidly beating heart and extreme nausea were merely nervous reactions to being suddenly asked out on an obvious date, not at all from the fact that Orchards is a mere block and corner away from the apartment that Jesse and Ellie shared. 
“It’s not that I don’t want to!” You insist. “It’s just that… I mean, are you sure?” 
“Sure about what?” 
“I don’t know… that you wanna be asking me out on a date.” 
“Doesn’t have to be an official date if you don’t want it to be,” She says. “It can just be two friends going out on a Friday night for a nice dinner together and having a fun time.” 
“At a super fancy restaurant?” 
“Hey, I’m a really good friend.” 
You can’t help but giggle at Abby’s cheekiness. 
From experience alone, you have a gut feeling somehow that if you were to decline Abby’s invitation, she wouldn’t hold it against you. You could choose to once again remain within the sanctuary of your platonic comfort zone, a sanctuary that you’d grown far too comfortable in for the past couple of years. But Abby was genuinely sweet and so thoughtful and incredibly handsome, and she’d been so very good to you so far. Suddenly, wise words from both Dina and Jesse come back to you and echo within your mind. 
“Don’t let her stop you from enjoying your life.” 
“I also think that you deserve to be happy. And unfortunately, that means putting yourself out there.” 
Trying to hold back from letting out an audible sigh, you finally give Abby a reply. 
“Alright.” 
“Oh?” 
“Alright.” You repeat, smiling slightly. 
“Is that a yes?” Abby asks. 
“It’s a yes,” You giggle. “Now whether it’s a friend date or a real date…” 
“Hey, I’ll take whatever I can get,” Abby laughs. “You don’t have to decide now. Hell, you can even decide during dessert while we’re actually at the restaurant.” 
“You’re cute.” You chuckle. 
“Oh, I know.” You swear you can hear Abby’s cocky smirk through the phone. 
“So, Friday at 7?” You confirm. 
“If that works for you. Do you want me to come pick you up from your place?” 
You seriously consider her generous offer. A small part of you knows that there is every chance that you would end up bailing in total anxiety if you weren’t essentially escorted to the date. Part of you also begins to worry that you’d immediately look out of place if you walked in alone without Abby and her usual charm & swagger by your side. But you then remember that Abby’s apartment is only five minutes away from the restaurant and yours was fifteen and in the complete opposite direction; your unrelenting unwillingness to inconvenience her ultimately makes the decision for you. 
“Oh, it’s okay! I can just meet you there.” You exclaim. 
“You sure? I totally don’t mind coming to get you.” 
“Abby.” You say in a playfully stern manner. 
“I know, I know,” Abby chuckles. “You’re a big girl.” 
“Yes, ma’am, I am.” 
Suppressing from loudly exhaling in both relief and tension, you finally remember and notice all of the unfinished homework still laid out right in front of you. 
“Anyway, just text me all the details later. I’ve got a shit ton of homework that I’ve been procrastinating on, and you’ve kind of been sidetracking me from completing any of  it.” 
“My apologies, it was not my intention to be so distracting.” 
“Yes, it was.” 
“Okay, maybe a little.” 
You both laugh. 
“Alright, alright,” Abby complies. “I’ll let you get to it. I’ll see you in the morning?” 
“Don’t you have class at like, 8?” 
“I can skip it so I can walk you to your 9 A.M.” 
“Abigail, go to your classes.” 
“Fine,” She chuckles. “I’ll be a good student, I guess. Always so eager to be rid of me.” 
“Abby Anderson, I swear to god—“ 
“Kidding, kidding!” 
“I’ll text you later, then.” You say. 
“Sounds good. Good luck with your homework.” 
“Thanks. Good night, Abs.” 
“Good night, pretty girl.” 
You tap the red button at the bottom of your screen, subsequently ending the call. 
Sighing, you flop onto your back and stare at your prickly white ceiling. Your eyes zoom in and out of focus as your mind recaps the conversation you just had with the blonde, blue-eyed woman. 
Did I just agree to go out with Abby? 
Do I really want to do this? 
This is gonna be so, so different from the other night. We were with her friends. She’s inviting me out to be with her and only her. 
It’s going to be a date, no matter what she says. 
I don’t even know what the hell I’m doing anymore. 
Am I doing this because I want to do it? Or is it because I feel like I should? 
She doesn’t even know what she’s taking on, trying to date me. She doesn’t know what she’s getting into. She’s way too nice, too sweet for me. 
Can I really do this? 
As your internal monologue quickly fatigues both your mind and your emotions, you nearly pass out before the panic of not finishing your schoolwork jolts you awake once again. 
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 “What about this one?” 
“No, it hugs my thighs really weird…” 
“First of all, it does not. Second, why do you even have it in the first place, then?!” 
“Sentimental value, D!” 
You had invited Dina over that Wednesday evening to help you settle on an outfit to wear for your date-not-a-date in two days. You’d finally relented to telling Dina about your situation with Abby and how on the fence you’ve been in regards to starting anything romantic and real with her. To your surprise, Dina was a lot less judgier than you had been anticipating and much more understanding. She was just as supportive as she was the day she came over with the cup of coffee and advice regarding your messy situation with Ellie. She even enthusiastically invited herself over, accurately predicting that you were already far too hesitant and anxious to properly plan for Friday night. 
You snatch the white dress Dina had been holding out for you from her hands and throw it onto your bed. 
“If we can’t find actually anything suitable for me to wear, maybe it’s a sign from the universe that I should cancel on Abby.” 
“The hell it is!” Dina scolds. “You are going on this date, even if I have to go out right now and buy you a whole new outfit myself!” 
“I just don’t think I actually have anything good enough for Orchards! I’m gonna go there and look like a freaking shabby peasant, and Abby will take one look at me and immediately collapse on the spot over how disgustingly and horrifically ugly I look.” You flop onto your bed next to the pile of rejects you’d adamantly denied earlier in the evening. 
“Did you really just say ‘peasant’? What are you, eighty?” Dina rolls her eyes at your dramatics. “And if Abby Anderson passes out on the spot for any reason, it’ll only be because you will be so stunning and gorgeous and ravishing and elegant that she just couldn’t consciously handle your natural beauty.” 
“Oh, shut the fuck up, D!” You laugh, picking up the white dress Dina was holding previously and lobbing it at her face. 
Dina laughs as she effortlessly catches it before placing it back on top of the reject pile. She then saunters back into your walk-in closet to continue examining its contents. 
“Maybe if we build your date outfit from—” 
“Not a date.” 
“—your date outfit from an accessory or a pair of shoes or something. Do you have a pair of heels that you were thinking of wearing?” 
You give her an apprehensive look.
“What do you think, D?” 
“Of course. Be helpful for two seconds, babe.” 
“Ugh!” 
You lift your head slightly to watch her venture further into your closet from the comfort of your bed. 
“I have a whole bunch of other shoes on the top shelf over there,” You say, pointing in the direction of a wall-mounted shelf above your clothes arranged on hangers. “Some of them are still in their shoe boxes, though, so you better put them back properly after and line them up exactly the way I had them.” 
“Anal.” Dina scoffs, smiling. “Why are they still in their boxes?” 
“Some of them were stupid, impulse purchases that I immediately regretted but was too lazy to return,” You explain, dropping your head back onto your bed. “Others are a bunch of ugly and uncomfortable shoes that my mother bought me and that I have to lie about wearing regularly and that I’m definitely not allowed to get rid of, lest she murders me in cold blood with her own two hands.” 
“So when are we going to finally end the miserable existence of that horrible woman again, exactly?” 
“When I figure out exactly how to get away with murder.” 
Dina smirks as she grabs a small step stool hidden in a corner of your closet. 
“Hey, if Barbie Bear had actually come to life when I asked her to all those years ago, you would have been free from that witch’s clutches by now.” Dina huffs as she begins to peek into the shoe boxes neatly arranged on the top shelf of your closet. 
“Speaking of Barbie Bear,” You suddenly segue, still staring up at the ceiling of your apartment. “I still want her back, by the way.” 
“I told you fifty million times already that I don’t have her!” 
“Bullshit,” You counter. “I know I left her at your house summer after freshman year I came home with you guys.” 
“Babe, it’s been like, well over a year now. I promise that I don’t have her, and I seriously haven’t seen her anywhere in my house back home.” 
“I’m planning on pressing charges against you for kidnapping my child and for causing such catastrophic emotional distress as a result of the trauma of many years of motherly separation from my daughter.” 
“Such a fucking drama queen.” Dina chuckles as she continues her footwear search. 
“Dinaaaa,” You whine. “You know that Raf gave her to me—” 
“Uhhh…” Dina abruptly interrupts. “What the hell is this?” 
“What?” 
“What is this box?” Dina asks, climbing down the step stool with something in one hand. 
“Hmm?” You finally rise from your position and prop yourself up on your elbows to get a better look at what she was referring to. 
Dina slowly emerges from your closet holding something heavy in her hands. It looks like a shoe box at first glance; but upon further inspection, it looks quite different from the other containers that it was previously organized with. Dina reveals a dark blue memory box adorned with intricately drawn vines and flowers. On one side was a tiny strip of paper with the word “El” written in small golden ink. 
Your fingers go cold, your jaw goes slack, and your eyes widen. The absolute panicked expression on your face complements Dina’s expression of complete astonishment. 
“Oh, shit.” You mutter involuntarily. 
“Sooo…” Dina begins. “You’ve got… an Ellie box.” 
Knowing Dina very well, you figure that, at the very least, she already snuck a quick peek at its contents. You sigh, aware that lying to her face would be pointless. 
“Y-yeah. I’ve got an Ellie box.” 
Dina’s mouth drops open even further, and you groan in total embarrassment at her elated squeals of your name laced with amusement and intrigue. 
“An Ellie box!!! Oh my god! Scandalous! Outrageous! Somebody call the Vatican!” Dina exclaims happily, a shit-eating grin wide all over her face. 
“Dinaaaa…” You gripe. “Put it back right now!” 
“Absolutely not, you slut!” She excitedly cries as she plops herself down next to you on the bed, carelessly pushing your pile of discarded clothes further to the side. “This is the best day of my whole life.” 
“Dina!” You smack her arm but make no real attempts to pull the box away from her, knowing you wouldn’t win that very brief fight. 
“You’re the one who still has it!” She points out smugly. “And after you swore to me the other week that you are definitely not in love with Ellie anymore.” 
“I’m not!” 
“Yeah, yeah, yeah” She simply waves you off as she removes the lid. “Keep telling yourself that, babe.” 
You fall back onto your sheets, shrouding your face behind your hands in shame as Dina giggles giddily to herself. 
You try in vain to convince yourself that you’d completely forgotten you even had the memory box in the first place, that it was something you’d meant to get rid of ages ago but merely never gotten around to. It was shoved, after all, in between all the pairs of shoes you never touch, always closed and completely neglected. But the brutally honest part of your conscience knows that its continued existence in your closet is a representation of something you desperately try to keep buried deep within the corners of your mind.  
Unable to help yourself, you cautiously peek behind your hands to observe Dina’s extensive inspection of your secret Ellie box. You watch as she picks up several pieces of paper: a faded ticket stub from a show Ellie once took you to of a local band whose music she wanted to introduce you to, a receipt from the time that you and Ellie attended a limited portrait exhibition at a nearby art museum, an unfinished charcoal picture Ellie had drawn of a small field of blooming daisies you’d spotted when you’d gone with her to the woods to freely smoke in secret. 
You try to block out the images the box’s contents were involuntarily eliciting from memories you’d hidden long ago as Dina places the papers back in lieu of a stack of envelopes wrapped together with a thin piece of twine. A gentle smile appears on Dina’s face as she tenderly turns the handwritten letters back and forth between her hands. 
“You know,” She says quietly. “Ellie used to really love whenever you wrote her these letters to her. Jesse and I used to catch her rereading them all the time, even super old ones you’d written her months before.” 
You quickly feel your entire body burn hot with a sweltering sensation that you hadn’t let yourself fully feel in years. 
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Fall of Freshman Year 
The university that you’d chosen to reside in for the next four years was chosen partially for its distance away from your hometown, from your parents in particular. Longing to be liberated from their tyrannical control, you applied exclusively to schools that were no less than a hundred miles away. Not a week into your freshman year, however, the guilt of choosing to be so far away from your favourite cousin ate at you every second you were apart. To give Rafael something tangible to consistently remind him of you, you’d send handwritten letters to him through the mail at least twice a month while you attended college. Though you’d chat with him regardless through texts and video on a regular basis, you enjoyed showering him with sisterly love in your own sweet and corny way.  
Ellie was sprawled out on your bed one night while you sat at your rickety, battered student desk. She was busying herself by rolling a few joints, all packed with lavender buds you’d previously provided, and placing them in her metal tin. As she placed the last one next to the others and put another in between her lips, she hopped off your bed and came to hover nosily behind you. 
“Are you really doing homework this late?” 
“Shut up and go finish rolling so we can smoke already.” 
“What are you doing?” 
“Not my homework.” 
“Then what?” 
Ellie curiously leaned over your shoulder and watched the way your hand smoothly and speedily glided over your favourite piece of floral stationary, writing legibly your own blend of print and cursive. To the right of your paper was a small white envelope with both your name and Rafael’s written on the front accompanied by your respective addresses. To the left was a golden stamp seal of a sunflower and a tiny mason jar full of multicoloured wax beads. 
“Are you writing a letter? With your hands?” 
“I mean, how else are you supposed to write a letter, El?” 
“What kind of nerdy ass nonsense—” 
“Go roll our shit, Ellie Williams!” You interrupted, taking a pencil within your reach and flicking it at her. 
She chuckled, blocking it in time before it hit her directly in the face. She placed it back on your desk before picking up the sunflower seal and examining it closely. 
“You’re writing an actual letter, for real?” She asked, her lips still tight with the joint in between her lips. 
“Mhmm.” You hummed. 
“To your cousin?” 
“Yup.” 
“Why?” 
“Because I feel like it.” 
“That’s some shit that only senile, lonely grandmas do on their grandkid’s birthday when they’re sending them fifty bucks in cash.” Ellie teased as she placed the sunflower stamp back on your desk. 
“So, what?” 
“So, you’re even more of a nerd than I thought.” 
“Shut up!” 
“Hey, not my fault that you’re an old lady.” 
“Can you go finish rolling our joints so we can smoke already?” 
“I’m already done, grandma!” 
“Then go away and hush!” 
Ellie chuckled as she leaned against your desk and took out a lighter from a front pocket of her jeans. She moved to ignite the tip of the joint, but you smacked her arm and pointed towards your bed. 
“Sploof, sploof, sploof!!!” You demanded. 
“What? Tara won’t care about the smell. She smells like weed half the time herself.” 
“My RA will notice, though! I don’t wanna get kicked out in my first year of college just ‘cause you’re lazy!” 
“Thought that the whole point of your lavender shit was to mask the weed smell.” 
You didn’t reply and settled for looking at her with a stern glare. She laughed and mockingly held up both her hands in defeat. 
“Alright, alright! Stick-in-the-mud.” 
She walked over to your bed, plopping back down and reaching for the paper towel roll that she’d wrapped securely with duct tape and stuffed with several dryer sheets. After lighting the joint and taking a deep hit, she exhaled deeply into the cylindrical piece of cardboard. Her ocean green eyes remained fixated on you, fixated on concluding your letter. 
“So why are you sending Rafael snail mail? Don’t you guys talk like, almost every day?” 
“We do. But it’s just something I really love doing. Makes me feel connected with him in more than one way, you know?” 
Ellie merely hummed in acknowledgement as you continued your explanation. 
“I used to do it a lot back in high school for the friends I had at the time. Or at least I did until my parents made me stop when they complained about me using up all their stamps.” 
“Dicks.” Ellie chuckled. “Did any of your friends ever write you back?” 
“No,” You said simply. “I totally get it though. We saw each other every single day at school. It makes sense for them not to send some handwritten reply through the mail.” 
Your expression looked completely and genuinely unbothered, but Ellie frowned. 
“That was pretty rude of them.” She pointed out. 
“Oh, it’s okay. I never thought it was. I didn’t do it to get anything back from them or anything. Just did it ‘cause I really cared about my friends and wanted to show that in my way. It was sort of like my own kind of love language.” 
Ellie continued to watch you in total awe as you folded up the stationary and stuffed it into the envelope. You thoughtfully picked out a couple of wax beads from the mason jar, two violet and one silver, and placed them on a tiny spoon that you placed on top of a mahogany wax warmer. You turned around to face her, one hand held out in her direction. 
“Can I borrow your lighter, El?” You asked. 
Ellie, still mesmerized by your routine, blinked in disorientation. 
“Wh-what?” 
“Your lighter, dummy. Can I use it for a sec?” 
“O-oh, y-yeah.” 
She’d completely forgotten about the lit joint still placed between her lips. After quickly inhaling from the cigarette and exhaling into the sploof, she shoved a hand into her jean pocket once again and handed you her lighter. She ignored the subtle electricity that sparked between you when her fingertips brushed against yours. 
She observed the way you carefully lit the white tealight candle inside the wax warmer and stared at the way the beads slowly melted inside the small spoon. Clearing her throat and finally handing you the joint, she leaned back onto your pillows and tried to lighten the mood. 
“So, you’re allowed to a candle in your dorm room, but I can’t even smoke?” 
“Asshole, I’m literally smoking with you right now.” You pointed out before bringing the joint to your lips and relighting the tip. 
“I’m just saying, double standard.” Ellie shrugged. 
“Wh—double standard? Does anything you say ever make any sense?” You asked with tight lips, hysterically flapping a hand in the direction of the sploof next to her on the bed. 
She laughed and quickly handed it to you, once again ignoring that flicker of electricity at your touch. 
“I love being an enigma to all human beings.” 
“Fucking weirdo.” You replied after exhaling into the wrapped paper towel roll. 
Ellie gave you a cocky wink, and you ignored the feverish burning of your cheeks. 
“So,” She began as you suck from the joint once more. “Am I ever going to receive one of these  fancy ass letters of yours?” 
“What? What for?” 
“I don’t know; just wanna see all the fuss is about.” 
“I see you every day, El. We literally live on the same campus.” 
“So, what? I still want one.” 
“You just said it was an old lady activity.” 
“It is.” 
“You’re not helping your case by being mean to me, you know.” 
You handed the joint and sploof back to Ellie and turned your uncomfortable desk chair around to lean back into it and face her directly. 
“You wouldn’t want one, anyway. It’s almost always all corny and sentimental.” 
“I mean, I expected as much. Have you met you?” Ellie gestured to you with the joint between her fingers. 
You playfully stick your tongue at her. 
“You are a rude and blunt asshole, El. Corny and sentimental aren’t really your thing.” 
“Fine!” Ellie jokingly conceded after taking a huge hit of the joint. “I didn’t really want one, anyway!” 
You rolled your eyes at her petulant and whiny expression. Ellie finished off the rest of the joint as you delicately poured the melted wax onto the envelope and sealed it with the sunflower stamp. 
Despite having just made lighthearted fun of you for it, the small smile on Ellie’s lips contradicted her prior teasing. She adored watching you perform such a personal ritual, and she felt special to be given your natural, instinctive trust by comfortably allowing her to witness such an intimate act. 
Out of sheer stubbornness and defiance on your part, you gave Ellie her very own handwritten letter the following day. You found some time during your day to slip it underneath her door in between your classes, and you quickly scampered off before either she or Jesse came home. You were still a bit huffy over her playful teasing the previous night, and you wanted to tease her back in your own way. 
To your slight surprise, Ellie was completely amused and ecstatic by your act of indignation. She eagerly opened the small, white envelope with her name written in golden cursive on the front, carefully avoiding ripping the fancy seal you’d closed the letter with: a forest green wax seal with hints of gold, embellished with a pair of ferns that notably matched that of her forearm tattoo. 
Inside the envelope was a simple, small piece of paper with only seven words written on it: “you are so, so mean to me,”  followed by a tiny sad face. 
You would have never guessed that her silly jabs at your sentimentality would establish a special ritual between you and Ellie. You were entertained by how truly thrilled Ellie had found her first letter that, on a frequent basis, you would sneakily slip formally sealed envelopes under her door or drop them inside her designated mail slot or hide them underneath her pillow with a short handwritten letter inside written in jest. But somewhere along the way, the little inside jokes eventually turned into genuine letters of you enthusiastically talking about innermost thoughts you’d be having at the time or words of loving encouragement when you knew she was having a particularly bad day. Your little confidences only for her eyes that were hidden by different wax seals, whether it be a bumblebee or a daisy or her token ferns, brought her a sense of comfort she could never quite comprehend. 
During that summer after your freshman year, you’d continued to regularly write her letters. But as she began to pull away from you, they never reached her as you became reluctant to actually present them. She sequentially stayed ignorant of their existence after you’d broken it all off with her.
But despite how horribly heart-wrenching the end of the whole affair was, you kept the letters anyway. You’d even composed several letters in the months following as a sorry means to ease your grief, confessing all the sentiments and feelings you wished you could have fully expressed to her but never got the chance to.
Some were furious and indignant over how she had been treating you that summer; others were wistful and nostalgic over the connection you’d believed you had with her but lost completely; each just as miserable as the next. Just as you were so unhealthily attached to the letters previously written to her, you couldn’t bear to throw out these melancholy ones. You settled instead on hiding them away, never meant to be seen by anyone else.
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You watch as Dina delicately runs her fingers over the different wax seals you’d used to close the envelopes, a kind but thoughtful look on her face. She sighs before speaking. 
“I really wished things worked out between the two of you, you know. Still do.” 
“I know, D.” 
She turns back to look at you, a sad smile still etched on her lips. 
“Still won’t tell me anything about what happened at the end of that summer? You still never told me and Jess. Hasn’t enough time passed?” 
“It doesn’t matter anymore, babe.” You sigh, shaking your head. 
“I guess not,” Dina says, turning back around to place the letters in the box. “Just wish you’d talk to me about it, even just a little bit.” 
Even now, you feel immense guilt over your unrelenting reluctance to reveal to Dina and Jesse what really transpired when Ellie dropped you off at home after your summer in Jackson. It had been consistently painful over the years not to confide in your closest friends, especially when you know just how badly they’ve always wanted to give you the comfort you so desired. But tarnishing the couple’s view of their childhood best friend after all this time feels pointless and immature, and you know you would never be able to forgive yourself if this subsequently caused a rift between the trio. 
 “I don’t want to have to bring it up again…” Dina asks quietly. “But I just feel like I need to ask you this once more.” 
“What is it, babe?” You reply, already aware of the question that looms obviously and ominously. 
“Do you really believe that you’re not still in love with Ellie?” She inquires. 
“I only have that box in my closet because I didn’t want to keep it at home for my parents to find and make a big fuss over. They barely know of Ellie’s existence in my life.” You respond quickly, making a deliberate attempt to avoid giving her an actual answer. 
“But why do you still even have it in the first place?” 
“Just forgot I even had it in there, you know.” You shrug, getting up from the bed to approach your walk-in closet. “Like I said, it’s stuffed in with all this other shit I never touch anyway. Literally forgot it still even existed until you brought it out just now.” 
Dina watches as you evade her probing gaze by getting up from your position on the bed to rifle through your hung clothes in the closet. She always had an uncanny way of reading people’s emotions, no matter how deeply others attempted to conceal them. Unwilling to let her delve deeper into whatever feelings you had in regards to Ellie, especially right before a date-not-a-date with Abby, you select several random articles of clothing from your closet and hold them up in front of Dina’s face to view. 
“Okay, I feel like these are good contenders for tonight. Which one do you think is classy and fancy enough for Orchards?” 
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You take a nervous step through the cherry wood entrance that leads into Orchards, wearing a light purple dress with strappy, silver heels to match. You cling tightly to the tiny handbag between your hands like your life depends on it. Exhaling deeply with your old therapy breathing techniques, you approach the wooden podium stationed several feet from the doorway. 
“Hi, umm,” You utter nervously. “I-I’m still waiting for the rest of my party, but the reservation should be under ‘Anderson’ for 7 o’clock?” 
The host scans the booklet before finding Abby’s name on the list. 
“I-I can definitely wait until she gets here, though! I can hang out in the vestibule. I totally don’t mind at all—” You stammer before the host interrupts. 
“Oh, reservation for Miss Abigail Anderson? I see it right here. Your companion has actually already arrived just a few minutes ago..” 
“O-oh, okay!” You say surprised. “I-I had no idea.” 
“Not a problem, ma’am. She came not too long ago. I can show you to your table if you would like to follow me.” The host replies graciously, grabbing a menu from underneath the podium before escorting you further into the restaurant. 
You tail after him, trying desperately to keep the sound of your heels clicking to a minimum but nearly tripping in the process. 
The interior of the restaurant surpasses the quick glances you’d stolen in passing from the adjoining street. If you had been born and raised to be an upper-class socialite who frequented such fine dining establishments, you’re sure you’d have felt quite at home upon stepping into the place. The tables are all neatly set with white tablecloths and golden napkins folded precisely and neatly at the top of the plates. The maroon Fleur-de-Lis seating is all dimly lit by the modern beaded chandeliers hanging over the patrons. Servers skillfully weave throughout the place, all coordinated in their white button-down shirts and black slacks. Your tiny handbag nearly slips out of your icy grip from how slippery your fingers had gotten with sweat. 
The restless intimidation that the establishment so easily oozed is slightly soothed when you catch sight of a familiar smiling blonde woman standing next to a table by the windows. The anxiety you have been feeling since entering Orchards is then replaced with a different type of tension as your eyes meet Abby’s piercing sky blue ones. 
She’s wearing a muted green shirt with a pair of grey slacks. Her dirty blonde hair is in its usual braid, but it appears looser than it usually is. You try not to stare at the way her muscular arms bulge from her shirt, trying to avert your eyes elsewhere. 
When you reach the table and whisper a “thank you” to the host as he places your menu next to your plate before he walks away, you return Abby’s winning smile with a flustered one of your own. She holds an arm out for you to give her a small, one-armed hug in greeting. 
“Hey, Abs,” You say as you briefly embrace her. “Have you been waiting long? I thought you said we were supposed to be meeting at 7.” 
“Well, I technically made the reservation for 6:45.” Abby replies, grinning at you unapologetically. 
“What the hell, Abby!” You scold, playfully smacking her left bicep before reaching for your seat. 
“I just like being prepared and being earlier than other people.” Abby shrugs, holding her hand out to help you into your chair as she pulls it out for you. 
“Jesus,” You chuckle as you roll your eyes. “Has anyone ever told you how that’s kind of lunatic behaviour, Abigail?” 
Abby merely smirks as she pushes your chair in for you, you murmuring a thanks in response. 
“So, what do you think of the place?” Abby asks as she walks around the table to take a seat in her own chair. 
“For a date-or-not-a-date, this is very extravagant.” You point out. 
“Like I told you before, I’m a really good friend.” Abby shrugs again. “Am I not allowed to treat a friend to a nice, well-deserved dinner?” 
“Abby.” You chide. “There’s no way that I’m letting you pay the whole bill by yourself. I know that this is a pretty pricey place.” 
“Yeah, and I have the money for it. Get whatever you want, pretty girl. What’s the point of having money if you’re not going to spend it on other people?” 
You don’t say anything, settling for merely pursing your lips as you take the neatly folded golden napkin off your plate and place it on top of your lap. 
Orchards being a “four dollar sign” type of restaurant is a partial reason why you remained silent. Not coming from money as Abby does, you’d firmly decided prior to the dinner that you were going to order the cheapest appetizer on the menu as an entrée and that you’d drink nothing else but water. But knowing Abby, she’d order every single dish for you until you actually eat a proper meal, especially after her casual yet firm declaration. 
But as you open up your menu and nervously bite the inside of your cheek, Abby’s last words begin to ring inside your ears. 
“What’s the point of having money if you’re not going to spend it on other people?” 
This was a sentence and philosophy that those around Ellie knew her quite well for. Every food delivery, every coffee order, every glass of vodka cranberry was paid for with Ellie’s hefty dealer income. You didn’t bother arguing with her when it came to it, not towards the end, because it was a pointless fight she would win every time. Despite every eye roll you’d throw her way, your heart would flutter every time you’d get a glimpse of the small, secret smile Ellie donned each time she’d spend her money on someone else. As long as those she cared about were happy, Ellie was happy. 
To see the same kind of propriety in someone else disoriented you, especially someone who has been making her romantic intentions with you quite clear. It’s a trait you so admire in Abby, but a reminder of the auburn-haired woman on a date-not-a-date with another person still pierces something deep within your guts. 
Adamant on keeping your mind off of Ellie for the rest of the night, you busy yourself going through Orchards’ lavish menu. 
“Have you been here before?” You ask Abby as you scan the list of soups and salads. 
“Once,” She replies as she goes through her own menu. “My aunt and uncle brought me here last year for my birthday, and I haven’t stopped thinking about their truffle parmesan tots since.” 
“Yeah? They that good?” 
“Oh, most definitely. I was ready to make love to it right there and then on the table.” 
“Eww! Abby!!” You giggle, squinting your eyes and scrunching up your nose in simultaneous disgust and laughter. 
You and Abby spend the next few minutes on small talk as you finish deciding on your order. Abby is in the middle of telling you about how she nearly elbowed a teammate right in the jaw during her last rugby practice earlier in the week when your phone begins to vibrate from inside your tiny handbag. 
You keep your eyes focused mostly on your companion, intent on being present in the conversation, while your fingers silently fish your phone out of your purse. Your gaze briefly diverts to the lit screen, and your eyebrows furrow when you see that it’s Jesse who’s calling you. 
Quickly pushing down your power button to reject the call for now while you make a mental note to call him back later, you shove your phone back into your handbag. You lean forward further and place your hands underneath your chin to make a show of being attentive, but only a few seconds pass before your phone starts to pulsate within your purse again. 
Suppressing an obvious groan of simultaneous annoyance and concern, you attempt to ignore Jesse’s second call and instead try to listen to the rest of Abby’s story. But when her sky blue eyes distractingly fall onto your purse, you sigh dejectedly and reluctantly pull your phone out once again. 
“Sorry, sorry,” You desperately utter as you reject the call again. “It’s Jesse. Not sure why he’s calling me right now.” 
“You sure you don’t wanna pick up? Might be something important.” Abby asks, eyes full of honest concern. 
“Oh, it’s okay. I’ll just call him back after—” You begin to say as your phone vibrates for a third time, violently begging for immediate recognition in your hand. 
“Don’t worry,” Abby chuckles. “Go ahead and answer it. He’s your friend and I know he’s important to you.” 
“I’m so, so sorry, Abby,” You say, awkwardly scrambling out of your seat with your phone in your hand. “He never, ever calls me like this, so I swear that I’m just gonna see what’s up, and then I’ll come right—” 
“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Abby interrupts, smiling. “I don’t mind at all, I promise. I’ll be right here. Take your time.” 
“You really are the best, Abs,” You sigh. “If the server comes around before I get back, could you get me the Caesar salad with Italian dressing?” 
Abby gives you another kind smile and nods. You give her a gracious look before dashing towards the direction of the restroom, purposely leaving your purse behind as an unspoken promise of your eventual return. 
You let out a heavy sigh after having swiftly glided through the restaurant and shut yourself in a unisex stall. Getting more nervous by the second, you immediately call the raven-haired man back. His delayed response begins to worry you further while you listen to seven agonizingly elongated rings before he eventually picks up. 
“Oh, hey, my dude! What’s up?” Jesse greets nonchalantly, slightly out of breath. 
“Wh-what—” You stutter, completely befuddled by his casual, unbothered tone. “Is everything all good? Are you okay? Why’d you call me?” 
“What? I didn’t call you.” 
“Jess, you called me like, fifty times just now.” 
“Wait, really? Hang on…” He mutters. “Oh, shit. Huh. I guess I did.” 
“Jesse!” 
“Sorry, dude! My fault for leaving my phone in my pocket while doing squats.” 
“Oh my g—I thought you were dying or something!” You gripe, sighing both in relief and annoyance. 
“Me? Die? Man, I’m indestructible,” Jesse proclaims. “No man can kill Jesse Chang.” 
“Jesus…” 
“Hey, I thought you were on a date, by the way?” 
“I am.” You point out, irritated. “Well, it’s not a date, but… whatever! I’m on it now!” 
“Then what are you doing calling me?” 
“You called me!” 
“Oh, yeah.” Jesse chuckles. 
“Dude!” You huff, clicking your tongue in indignation. 
“Hey, you’re listed as one of my favourite contacts. My phone was somehow compelled to communicate with you tonight for some mystical reason.” 
“I’m gonna kick your ass.” 
You suppress a chuckle at hearing Jesse’s genuine howls of laughter from his end of the line. 
“Alright, alright,” Jesse eventually says. “I’ll let you get back to it.” 
“Thanks.” 
“You’re doing alright, though?” Jesse suddenly asks, his lighthearted tone shifting to a more sincere one. “You feeling nervous?” 
“Always.” You admit. 
“You got this, man.” 
“I-I don’t know, Jess…” 
“Hey, you showed up, which means you’re halfway there already anyway.” 
“I know, I know. I just… I just can’t believe I’m on an actual date. I can’t believe that I’m actually doing this.” 
“I can. You are one foxy, amazing lady who deserves to be properly wined and dined.” 
“Okay, grandpa.” 
“There she is.” 
You allow yourself to chuckle this time, suddenly feeling grateful for Jesse’s accidental buttdials tonight. 
“Thanks, Jess. Needed that a bit, honestly.” 
“I know, bud. Call me or D afterwards? If Anderson isn’t too busy ploughing into you or whatever it is that you lesbians do in the LGBT community.” 
“Shut up!” 
Jesse cackles. 
“Yeah, I’ll call you guys right after.” You promise him. 
“Good. Now get back to your quote-unquote date and enjoy yourself.” 
“I’ll try.” 
“Do or do not. There is no—” 
“Don’t you fucking quote Star Wars to me, you nerd.” 
“Hey, but you recognized it. You’re the nerd.” 
“Whatever! I’ll call you after, grandpa!” 
“You better, young lady!” 
You and Jesse share a laugh. 
“Thanks, Jess. Have fun at movie night with D. Love you lots.” 
“Will do. Love you too, dude.” 
You murmur a farewell before ending the phone call. 
Leaning against the door of the stall and sliding down slightly, the comfort of hearing Jesse’s reassurances slowly dissipates as you think about Abby patiently awaiting your return at your table. You’d been so preoccupied with the anxiety of how the date-not-a-date itself would go that you hadn’t even spared a thought about the aftermath: how is the night going to end exactly? 
You gulp, suddenly aware of the way your silver heels are digging into your ankles. You feel guilty for even entertaining the thought of ending the night and running home to the embarrassing comfort of your bed.  
Why can’t I just fucking give in? Why am I stopping myself? Why am I so scared about how this night is going to end? 
The sound of someone else entering the restroom snaps you out of your thoughts and back into reality: the reality where you are on, what you need to admit to yourself, a date with an extremely handsome, charming woman who is willing to give you what you might just need from a romantic partner. 
A couple more minutes pass where you heavily abuse your breathing techniques before you finally find the courage to pry yourself off the door. You emerge from the stall just as your nameless powder room companion exits. 
You dare look at yourself in the mirror. Surprised to see a little bit of eyeliner smudged underneath your eyes, you quickly grab a paper towel to dab at it. 
Did I really just cry while I was on that phone call with Jesse? Christ, what the hell is wrong with me? 
You nearly poke yourself in the eye from frustration and stare at your tired reflection. The only thing that wills you to leave your restroom refuge is replaying Jesse’s supportive words of encouragement. 
He believes in me. Dina believes in me. 
With that and a heavy exhale, you finally depart the restroom. 
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As you finish off the last few crunchy croutons on your plate, you watch as Abby does the same with the French dish she’d ordered that you’d never heard of and had some weird-sounding name that you can’t pronounce. 
“You sure you don’t want dessert?” She asks you, setting down her spoon. 
“Abby,” You say sternly. “You already wore me down into getting an actual entrée and a glass of Moscato. You are not getting me dessert too.” 
“Dinner is just not complete without it!” 
“That is some rich people behaviour that I will not indulge in.” 
Abby laughs as you give her a half smile. In the back of your mind, you’re relieved that Abby’s evening wasn’t spoiled by your impromptu phone call and your slight shift in attitude that followed. She thankfully hadn’t noticed your fingers fiddling with your dress in your lap or your quiet but involuntary tapping of your right foot underneath the table. The more the evening progressed, the more anxious you became about the possibility of her eventually noticing your fidgeting. 
After the dessert flan she’d ordered is placed in front of her, Abby takes a small bite and lets out a moan of satisfaction. 
“I love me a good flan.” 
“That good, huh?” 
“Fucking amazing. Here, try some.” 
“Oh, no. You already tried to feed me your weird ass French dish from earlier. Besides, I’m way too stuffed already.” 
“All you ate was a Caesar salad!” 
“It was huge! It was Olive Garden-sized!” 
“Just have a bit of the flan!” 
“You ordered it! I don’t wanna eat something that you ordered for yourself!” 
“Come on, pretty girl. Just a bite!” 
You groan at her insistence. 
“You are absolutely ridiculous, Miss Anderson.” 
“Completely. Now open up.” 
You lean across the table as Abby meets you halfway with a piece of flan on a fork. She delicately places it on your tongue, her sky blue eyes meeting yours. 
Your throat swells up with nervousness and you feel short of breath as your chest tightens. You move to sit down from how dizzy you’re getting, but your eyes widen as Abby’s thumb suddenly brushes against your jaw. 
“Hang on. Some of it is dripping down.” 
Abby’s tongue involuntarily sticks out as she wipes away the syrupy caramel from your chin. Your eyes widen as your lips turn a shade paler than usual. 
Oh, god. Oh god oh god oh god. 
“U-uhh, um, th-thanks, Abs.” You stutter as you clumsily take your seat. 
“No problem,” Abby says, a corner of her lip cocking up in a half-smile. “Don’t need you all sticky.” 
 Your breath catches in your throat and you feel a tingle travel from the crown of your head all the way down to your heel-strapped ankles. Abby smirks slightly as she sips from her Old Fashioned, smugly leaning back into her chair. 
Oh, god. 
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Being the natural gentlemanwoman that she is, Abby holds the door open for you as you step out of Orchards and onto the street. 
“Ladies first.” She says playfully. 
“Oh, stop.” You chuckle. 
Abby grins as she gives the host by the podium a parting, thankful wave. 
Teetering back and forth on your feet and playing with the sound of clicking your heels were making, you nervously stare up at the night sky. When you had been making your way to Orchards earlier in the evening, the sun was still descending in the west and casting a beautiful, pink hue through clusters of cumulonimbus. Now, the sky is clear of any clouds, and the moon in its waning phase along with the constellations dimly light the quiet downtown area of this college town. 
Suddenly spotting a few celestial patterns that looked all too familiar from a face you’d been trying to put out of your mind all night, you tear your eyes away from the stars to meet Abby’s sky blue eyes. 
“H-hey,” You hesitatingly start. “Th-thank you for tonight. This honestly was really nice.” 
“Oh, yeah? I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.” 
“I really did, Abs,” You smile. “I haven’t had a nice, ritzy night like this in a while. Actually, I don’t know if I’ve ever had a really fancy night like this before.” 
“That so? Might have to take you out on dates like this more often, if that’s the case.” She pauses for a second, the usual confident expression on her face fading to be replaced with one of uncertainty. “Or… well, not a date exactly—” 
“Abby.” You giggle. “This was clearly a date.” 
“Yeah? So you finally decided?” Abby asks, her usual swagger back. 
“We got all dressed up and went to a very nice, swanky restaurant. You insisted on paying the entire bill and everything.” 
“Hey, that’s what friends do.” 
“Are we?” You ask, turning to completely face her. 
“What?” 
“Friends? Just friends?” 
“Hmm…” Abby hums. 
She takes you by surprise as she pulls you closer towards her by the hips. You stumble on your heels, catching yourself by your hands on her sturdy chest. You look up, meeting her bright, blue eyes that contradict that of the starry, shadowy sky. Fingers involuntarily clutching at her shirt, you gulp an anxious whimper down your tight throat. 
“What do you want, pretty girl?” Abby whispers. 
Your fingertips grow cold against her chest. 
“I-I-I’m— I don’t—” 
“Oh, hang on. Hold still.” Abby suddenly says. 
Her hand comes up to your face and her long fingers gingerly brush against your nose. She pulls her hand back, clutching something in between her fingers. 
“Got a loose eyelash.” She says, holding up for you to see. “Make a wish.” 
You entertain her and firmly close your eyes. You try racking your brain for a wish worth making to immediately come to you, but no desire materializes. 
So instead, you ask the universe for a vague, ubiquitous wish: for it to divinely and kindly lead you down the right path. 
You open your eyes and softly blow the eyelash out of Abby’s fingers. You lose sight of it instantly as Abby parts her pointer and thumb to release it into the open air. 
Abby brings her hand up once more, this time to caress her fingers across your cheek. Every inch of your body suddenly goes up in flames, and you’re almost surprised that Abby hasn’t retracted her hand from the pure heat of it. 
“Thank you for coming out with me tonight.” She says seriously. 
“O-of course, Abs.” You whisper. 
“I know you’ve been hesitant about things, and I won’t pry on why—” 
“It’s really gonna nothing to do with you, Abs, I promise—“ 
“No, no, it’s okay. You don’t have to explain anything to me if you don’t want to. I don’t want to push you on it.” 
You swallow. 
“But I just want you to know,” Abby continues. “I do like you, you know. A lot. I think you’re seriously so smart and silly and so, so stunning .” 
“Abs, be serious—” 
“I am.” 
“Y-yeah?” 
“Yeah. So if you ever wanna give me a chance, I’m right here. I’m ready for anything you want.” 
You gulp. 
“I-I’m not sure… not sure if you’re ready for all this. All of me and my baggage.” 
She takes your face between both her hands. 
“I’m ready for anything, pretty girl.” 
Before you know it, Abby’s mouth is suddenly on yours, enveloping you in a kiss. It’s soft and gentle, like she’s deliberately being mindful of how she touches you. 
You’d expected this the second her skin made contact with yours, but your body still reacts in complete surprise. You don’t kiss her back just yet, everything in you completely stuck in place. Your hands have an impulse to push her away, but a voice inside you begins to cry out. 
Kiss her! Kiss her the fuck back! Kiss her now! 
Fingers finally moving from their frozen state and grasping at her chest, you begin to kiss her back with hesitant fervour. 
The second your lips begin to move with hers, her delicateness turns into zeal. Her hands fall back down to your hips, wrapping her arms around your waist and pulling you even closer. You can feel her heartbeat pounding next to yours, drums sounding together unsynchronized but thundering. You let out a sudden and soft moan, and Abby deepens the kiss. 
She parts her mouth slowly and you feel her tongue against your teeth. You whimper when she starts to suck on your bottom lip as a hand comes up to clutch your hair. As you wrap your arms around her neck, you open your mouth slightly to invite her in further. 
After what feels like hours of you two intimately intertwined, you break the kiss to catch a much-needed breath. 
You open your eyes to meet Abby’s sky blue ones, even brighter than they were before. Her smile is wider than you’ve ever seen it, emanating a radiant glow. 
 “Th-that was…” She began. 
“Y-y…” You try to say, but you can’t seem to find your voice. 
Her hand brushes against your cheek once more as you feel your throat begin to close up once more. 
W-wait. My throat. It’s actually— 
Before you can muster any words, you feel your breathing stop completely and the entire world suddenly goes black. 
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author’s notes:
BELLE FINALLY POSTING AFTER MONTHS OF NO NCTY?! A MIRACLE
thank you for bearing with me during these past couple of months. i know many of y'all have been waiting very patiently, and i hope this chapter was worth the wait!
in true belle fashion, orchards is named after a restaurant that already exists in the games
reader's ellie box is totally not inspired exactly by the box i used to have for my ex-girlfriend, described exactly the same way and contained a whole bunch of stuff like the tickets from when we went to moma and the playbill when we went to see waitress on broadway....
mentions of daisies is because they symbolize innocence (also one of my fave students is named daisy)
ahhh sploofs. such flashbacks to when i lived with live-in ex at her dormitory in college. those were so annoying to make.
reader's love for writing handwritten letter is inspired by my own love for it. i write my friends letters all the time and seal them with cute wax seals. i have like, at least 15 different wax seals and i love them all. yes i do have a fern wax seal too. also reader has a sunflower seal bc it is my fave flower
reader's dress is purple for symbolism cause purple sometimes represents anxiety which... mood
the truffle tots are just a fun little reference to these truffle tots that my live-in ex and i get every time we go to this one gay bar, that shit is so fucking good
more of reader and ellie's relationship bc i love jesse but also i think a show of a healthy, platonic relationship between a lesbian and a straight man is important
jesse's line about never dying is a little heehee reference to the game obvi but also him saying that no man can kill him is like that lord of the rings line where eowyn says "i am no man" cause abby is obviously a woman lol
abby is eating flan bc i love flan (leche flan to be exact)
heehee leave some theories in the notes or in y'all's tags on what happened to reader at the end
love y'all so so much. chapter 13 is mostly written so stay tuned for an upcoming update very soon...
taglist: @lonelyfooryouonly, @elliesinterlude, @sawaagyapong, @peppesgirl, @iconsoft, @maybeidohaveadhd, @ellieswifee, @ valiantllamapersonpony-blog, @nil-eena, @echostinn, @uraesthete
@ softbunlvr, @cherriesxinthespring, @amitycat, @thefishymissy, @yevheniiaaaa, @machetegirl109, @bertandfearnie, @ximtiredx, @efam, @ elliesnumber1gf, @digit4lslut, @ tayyyystan, @emothurman
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joelsgreys · 1 year
Text
a safe haven l one
Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Female Reader
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series masterlist l next chapter
summary: After the events in Salt Lake City, Joel and Ellie are back in Jackson, Wyoming to start a brand new life in the safe haven; Ellie has a difficult time fitting in and adjusting in the community, but she finds a friend in you; Joel meets you for the very first time and strange new feelings instantly take root.
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. JACKSON ERA. AGE GAP (no specific age is mentioned, but reader’s in her late 20s/early 30s and Joel is 56). reader is basically an OFC but story is written in reader format and her physical descriptions are kept as vague as possible. i have my own face claim for her, but i will only ever share it under cuts and with disclaimers. reader is married, Ellie plays a very important role in the series, hints at her strained relationship with Joel but this will indeed be a fix it fic because he deserves it, okay?
word count: 8.1k
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Jackson, Wyoming | June, 2024
Joel’s deep, dark brown eyes linger on you from across the town mess hall with sheer, almost unabashed curiosity. Then again, he doesn’t even realize that he’s staring.
It’s about half past twelve, the designated lunch break hour in Jackson, and the larger scale eatery, which for the last couple of years has been run by an older man named Seth and his two surviving adult sons, is alive and well, buzzing loudly with obnoxious, overlapping chatter.
The hall is almost over maximum capacity, packed to the brim with several members of the steadily growing community who had stopped in for a quick bite to eat before having to resume their daily work duties around the settlement. Or at least, a majority of them had, anyway. Others shamelessly try to milk their lunch hour for all that it’s worth and more, dragging it out and extending their allotted free time for as long as they possibly can before having to return to their scheduled tasks around the commune. They float about the place, socializing as if the mess hall had suddenly turned into The Tipsy Bison, the bar right across the road that’s also owned by Seth.
Somehow, by a stroke of sheer good luck, you’d managed to find yourself a smaller, unoccupied table nestled against the wall, away from all the hustle and bustle. It’s tucked away over in the furthest corner of Jackson’s busy and bustling makeshift canteen, near where the aluminum double doors that lead back to the kitchens are propped wide open for the mess hall staff who were coming in and out to replenish the dishes at the buffet. 
You’re sitting at the table alone, your plastic lunch tray surrounded by an absurd amount of open books that Joel had very little choice but to assume came from the town’s modest, but decent sized library that he’d seen nestled between the schoolhouse and the old church, right behind Main Street. In between delicate bites of oven baked chicken and roasted vegetables harvested fresh from the gardens, you reach up and take the blunt, worn yellow pencil that’s tucked in the space behind your ear, using it to scribble on the notepad in your lap before putting the pencil back in its designated place. Although you’re clearly working through your lunch break today, that doesn’t stop you from being interrupted on several different occasions by numerous individuals—friends and familiar faces all approach you with hopeful expressions, eager to join you and keep you company. 
Sure, the hall is full, but there’s still a number of available seats still left at other partially occupied tables nearby, bigger tables that aren’t crowded with books like yours, tables whose occupants aren’t busy working, studying—doing whatever it is that you’re doing. It becomes apparent to Joel that you’re something of a hot commodity around here. He can’t quite put his finger on it, but there’s just something about you that reminds him of the sweet and popular small town girl his favorite country artists would sing about back in the day. The kind of girl with a magnetic presence and irresistible charm—the kind of girl that anyone can fall head over heels in love with in one way or another. 
There’s something almost too endearing about the gracious way you offer up just the most saccharine smile and apologetic doe eyes as you point to your books, politely declining every offer for companionship that comes your way, saying something he can imagine to be along the lines of, not today or maybe another time. Eventually, after a while, you’re finally left alone to bury yourself back into whatever it is that’s keeping you occupied that you can’t even have your midday meal in peace—you’re so engrossed in the task that you don’t even notice the older, salt and pepper haired newcomer who’s been blatantly staring at you from his table over on the opposite of the hall for the last several minutes. 
It’s not the first time Joel’s seen you around.
He still vividly remembers the moment when he’d first laid eyes on you several months ago during the winter season. 
It had been the morning after his fight with Ellie, after she’d confronted him and he had been forced to fess up about his plans to hand her off to his younger brother, Tommy—he’d asked him, pleaded with him, to get her to the Fireflies in Colorado. Joel’s mind had been in an all out raging war, his heart torn between doing what he’d felt was best for Ellie and what he truly wanted, which was to remain by her side and get her to where she needed to be himself. But how the fuck could he do that when all he’d managed to do in the few months prior to their arrival in Wyoming was fail to protect her over and over again? Sure, Ellie was a teenager, now closer to being an adult than anything else, but she was still a child, one who needed to be protected, kept safe. She needed somebody who could get to where she needed to be in one piece, and Joel had come to the conclusion that, as much as he wanted to be that person, he simply wasn’t capable. Slower, older, his hearing getting worse and worse as the days go by, he feared he’d only end up getting her killed if she continued on with him, a scenario he fucking refused to let happen at all costs. He wouldn’t hold another child’s dead body in his arms, not again.
Following a very long and sleepless night of tossing and turning, Joel had pulled himself out of bed just after sunrise that morning. After getting dressed, he’d quietly slipped out of the house and made his way down to the horse stables, hoping he could leave the commune as soon as possible and without notice from Tommy—and especially without notice from Ellie. It’s not that he had wanted to leave without saying goodbye to her, but Joel knew he wouldn’t have it in him to follow through with the decision he’d made about parting ways with her if he saw her face again, not a fucking chance. And so there he’d been, in one of the stalls at the stables, saddling up the horse he planned to steal and take off on when you’d walked by, flashing him a warm and friendly smile, probably assuming he was just another patrolman getting ready to head out for the morning shift. 
Joel had just stared at you, lips pressed together into a tight, thin line with an emotionless expression on his hard, stony face.
Of course, you were nothing more than a complete stranger who didn’t have the slightest clue as to what was going through his mind. You couldn’t have possibly imagined what was happening to the tortured older man you’d just encountered, the way his inner turmoil was a single thought away from tearing him apart from the inside out. You’d probably just thought he was rude for not smiling back, or at the very least, offering you a courteous good morning.
He’d almost forgotten about you since then.
Almost.
It’d been rather difficult for him to forget all about the prettiest goddamn fucking face he’d ever seen since the world ended two decades ago—not even after all of the events that followed that fateful morning.
The next time Joel had seen you was on his second day back in Wyoming. He and Ellie had made a trip down to the produce market on Main Street to pick up some vegetables and jarred preserves to stock up the kitchen pantry of their new, forever home. He’d caught sight of you as you made your way down one of the aisles towards the sweet potato bins with a brown, woven basket hanging from one arm and a reusable shopping bag draped over the other. Before Joel even realized that he’d been staring, your kind gaze met his own from across the market and you smiled at him again.
Still just as warm, still just as friendly. And you were still just as fucking beautiful as he remembered.
Much like that winter morning in the horse stables, Joel didn’t smile back at you. 
Two for fucking two—surely you must have thought he was a mannerless asshole at this point. He honestly wouldn’t blame you if you did. He’d think the same. 
Tommy, who had made it back from leading his morning patrol group just in time to join him for lunch, waves a hand in front of Joel’s face, looking thoroughly amused. “Maybe we should find you a goddamn camera,” he teases, letting out a small chuckle once he’d finally managed to break the older Miller’s trance, garnering his attention. “Y’know, so you can take a picture. It’ll last a hell of a lot longer.”
Joel scowls at his brother, though he says nothing.
He can’t very well deny that he’d been caught openly gawking. 
“Shut up, Tommy,” is all he can come up with before taking a large bite of seasoned carrots, heat flooding his face. The way Tommy’s looking at him, with that mischievous glimmer in his eyes, it reminds Joel of their younger years, when Tommy would make it his mission in life to do anything that would cause him discomfort just for his own kicks. 
“Hey, I don’t really blame you, y’know.” Tommy reaches over for his glass of sweet iced tea and picks it up, taking a long and refreshing sip. Smacking his lips together, he casually shrugs his shoulders, shooting Joel a knowing smirk over the top the glass as he comments, “She’s certainly a sight for sore eyes, ain’t she, big brother?”
“Watch it. Don’t think Maria would appreciate you sayin’ that kinda thing ’bout another woman who ain’t her,” Joel warns, cocking an eyebrow at him. His brother hadn’t always been the most faithful of partners in his first life, but Tommy truly seemed to be head over heels in love with his wife. Hearing him talk about another woman makes Joel wonder if perhaps remnants of his playboy ways still lingered behind even after twenty years. With Maria having just found out she was expecting his child, Joel certainly hopes that isn’t the case. “Eyes to yourself, asshole.”
Tommy shrugs again. “Ain’t no real harm in just takin’ a quick peek every once in a while,” he muses, although there’s a joking edge to his tone. Setting his glass of iced tea back down onto the table in front of him, he leans back into his chair and glances over at you. He lets out a long, low whistle, another smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. “Oh trust me, I get it, Joel—hell, every man around here gets it, fuckin’ single or not. She’s a real fuckin’ beauty, she is. But I should probably go ahead and warn you now that it’s best you don’t go gettin’ any ideas when it comes to that one.”
Before Joel can even stop himself, he finds himself asking, “Why’s that?
“Well for starters, that girl’s damn near half your fuckin’ age, you old fucker.”
Joel flips him off.
“Besides that, she’s already spoken for.” 
“She’s got a boyfriend.” It’s a statement, not a question.
“She’s got a husband,” Tommy corrects him. “She’s a married woman, Joel. And here’s the real fuckin’ kicker. She’s married to Jackson’s only doctor.”
Joel snorts, rolling his eyes. “A real doctor? Or just some fuckin’ clueless prick who claims to be a doctor?” he questions, shoving another forkful of his carrots into his mouth.
The younger man laughs at the bitter skepticism, knowing that it’d come from a place of envy more than anything. “Real, Joel. The guy’s around my age, give or take a couple years. He was finishin’ up his medical school residency when the outbreak first happened, at least that’s what Maria says,” he explains. He notices the confusion flash across Joel’s face and continues to elaborate. “Two of them go way back, went to the same college before she transferred out to another school for her law degree. Maria came across him and his group one day while out lookin’ for supplies. She said he still knew his stuff after all these years and decided to bring him in as the community’s physician. He looks after everyone around here. Delivers the babies, stitches up wounds. Hell, I broke my arm in a stupid ridin’ accident last summer and he set the bone right back into place, had me good as new within a few weeks. S’a miracle we’ve got someone like him around here.”
Joel glances down at his plate, twiddling his fork between his thumb and his index finger. He would have been a goddamn dirty liar if he’d said that finding out you were a married woman didn’t bother him. 
And to a fucking hero doctor nonetheless.
That only makes it sting a little harder.
Tommy immediately picks up on his brother’s disappointment in hearing the news about you being taken and softly kicks his shin with the toe of his boot underneath the table. “Y’know Joel, there’s plenty of other single women around here. Pretty ones, and real nice, too,” he informs him with a small smile. He pauses and then offers, “If you’re interested, I could introduce you around. Maria has this friend, her name is Esther and she’s a real cute blonde—”
“That’s the last thing on my fuckin’ mind,” Joel grumbles out in reply. He tightly shakes his head. “I just fuckin’ got here, Tommy. Besides, I’ve got Ellie that I need to take care of. We’re both tryin’ to get used to this place after bein’ out there on the road for so long. We’re still in the middle of gettin’ ourselves settled. The kid’s my priority right now—my only fuckin’ priority. Not meetin’ someone.”
Not wanting to push him too far, Tommy goes along with the subject change. “Speakin’ of Ellie, how’s she been doin’ by the way? Haven’t really seen much of her since you two got back.”
Joel hesitates, momentarily unable to meet Tommy’s eyes.
It’d been a couple of weeks now since the events that took place back in Salt Lake City. 
Since the hospital.
Since the Fireflies.
Joel had certainly thought once or twice about confiding in Tommy about what he had done. How he had ruthlessly and without a single ounce of mercy killed all of those people in the hospital, how he had shot Marlene dead at point blank range—how he had violently and single handedly stopped what had most likely been humanity’s only chance at potentially finding a cure for the cordyceps infection by preventing the Fireflies from operating on Ellie and performing a brain surgery that would have killed her. 
Joel doesn’t regret it, nor does he regret the choice he’d made on Ellie’s behalf.
He would do it all over again in a fucking heartbeat if it came down to it.
He doesn’t carry guilt over having done what he’d done, but he does carry the guilt of having lied to her about it after it was all said and done. He felt awful for looking her in the eye and swearing to her that everything he’d said about the Fireflies was true when it wasn’t. Ellie claimed to believe him, but he knew better than that. She was smart, too fucking smart for her own good. She might not have known the extent of it all, but she knew for certain that Joel wasn’t being entirely forthright about what had gone down in Salt Lake City while she’d been unconscious.
From that moment on the mountain, things had been quite tense between them. That conversation instantly caused a rift in their relationship, but Joel could tell she was doing her very best to force herself to fully believe that he was still a person she could trust, a person she could put her faith in. He took an odd sense of comfort in knowing that her forced efforts to keep believing in him had to have meant something good. 
She didn’t want to give up on him or on their relationship.
Joel exhales a heavy sigh, finally answering the question. “Not too great,” he admits, quietly. “I’m real worried ‘bout her, Tommy. It’s been a couple weeks now since we’ve been back and she still hasn’t made one single goddamn friend around here. She doesn’t fuckin’ talk to anyone, barely even talks to Maria.” He sighs again, tiredly rubbing the side of his face with his free hand. “She spends most of her time hidin’ out in the stables with the horses. She would rather be around them than other people. She can’t live the rest of her life like that. I try to tell her she needs to put in more effort on her part, but she won’t fuckin’ listen to me.”
“Just give her some more time, Joel. After everythin’ that poor kid’s been through in her life, it ain’t a big surprise that she’s strugglin’ a bit to fit in around here, y’know?” Tommy notices the way his older brother’s jaw clenches and he offers him a look of sympathy. “Look, I know Ellie means a whole lot to you and if I were you, I would be real worried ’bout her too. But just give her a little more time to adjust. She’ll get there, I know she fuckin’ will. She’s a real strong kid, big brother.”
“Yeah, I know she is,” Joel murmurs in agreement. “Hell of a lot stronger than someone her age should have to be.”
“She’ll be just fine,” Tommy reassures him. “She’ll find her place here, Joel. Just wait. You’ll see.”
“I sure as hell fuckin’ hope you’re right.”
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You relish the feeling of warm sunlight hitting your face.
Summer’s just beginning in Wyoming, and after a particularly long, cold and cruel winter that swept the western state this last year, you couldn’t have been more thrilled to see that warmer weather is well on its way.
At least, for now you’re thrilled.
Winters in Jackson were god awful, but summers could be just as brutal, if not worse.
Clutching the strap of your old, but sturdy brown leather satchel bag securely over your shoulder, you hurriedly make your way across the settlement from the mess hall and back towards the horse stables, the place you commonly referred to as your second home—it wasn’t all that much of a joke, seeing as you often spent more time there than you didn’t. It’s now after lunch hour, and there’s still plenty of work to be done before the end of the day rolls around, most of it which would undoubtedly trickle into the next day.
Being the only veterinarian in the community, there was always more than plenty of work to be done every day. Too much work to be done by one single person alone. Often, you find yourself feeling quite overwhelmed by it all. You feel like you’re completely in over your head, and it leaves you wondering if you’d made the right decision by taking such an enormous responsibility into your hands.
Then again, it’s not like you’d been given much of a choice. In a way, it had been expected of you.
Prior to passing away from illness two summers ago, your father had been the veterinarian who looked after the animals. Even though you hadn’t been trained professionally like he had, your father decided to spend the final years of his life teaching you to the best of his ability and with what little resources he had available. After all, Jackson was going to need someone to step up and take care of the animals when he was gone—particularly the hoses. Even as his physical health worsened, he used every last ounce of strength he had left in him to prepare you to take over for him when he died. Thanks to him and all he’d done for you, you certainly knew a thing or two, but the job was still daunting, even after all this time of being in practice on your own without him there to guide you like before.
Keeping the horses healthy to begin with made your job a hell of a lot easier, but when a horse became sick or injured, that was when your knowledge and your skills were truly put to the test. Horses were how everyone traveled when in search of needed supplies, how patrolmen and women moved around while they were out and about on watch keeping the community safe against the infected and against raiders. Horses were one of the most important, most precious resources the commune possessed. They kept everything going, everyone moving, and you’d be fucking lying if you said that being the sole person in charge of caring for them didn’t put a tremendous amount of pressure on your shoulders.
Sensing your doubt, Maria Miller often assured you that you were the best person for the role—the only person for the role. “The apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree,” she had complimented you over coffee at her place the morning after you had successfully removed a bullet lodged into the shoulder of one of the horses that had been injured while Tommy and his group were out on overnight patrol. They’d stumbled across violent and armed raiders, and luckily everyone had made it out unscathed with the exception of Tommy’s beloved black horse, Ranger. You recalled being pulled out of your bed in the middle of the night to tend to him, the first serious case you had to take care of without your father’s guidance. Thankfully, the stallion’s injury hadn’t been life threatening, and you were able to patch him up within the hour. After just a few weeks of working with Ranger and putting him through physical therapy, the horse made a full recovery and both Maria and Tommy couldn’t have been more thrilled with your work.
Still, you still continued questioning your own abilities, but it didn’t really matter in the end. Both Maria and Tommy decided to assign you as Jackson’s equine veterinarian, pulling you from your previous job, which had been helping Seth make sandwiches at The Tipsy Bison.
You rush into the stables, making a mental list with the names of all the horses that you still need to check over for the day, including the group of horses that had just arrived back from that morning’s patrol. You make your way down to the very last stall which is serving as home to a stunning, chestnut-brown pregnant mare.
“Hi there, Stella,” you coo sweetly, beaming at the beauty. “Hi, my gorgeous girl. How are you doing today, sweetie pie?”
“I would be doing a hell of a lot better if I could have one of those apples in your bag,” a voice answers, startling you slightly.
Peering around Stella’s body, you catch sight of Ellie laying down on a small bed of hay in the furthest corner of the stall. She’d made something of a pillow out of her backpack, kicking back as she flips through her favorite superhero comic book for what had to be the hundredth time. She offers you a silly, lopsided grin the minute she takes a glimpse at the baffled look on your face. “Howdy.”
“Ellie,” you sigh her name softly. “What in the world are you doing in here?”
“Living my best life,” she deadpans. “What else does it look like I’m doing?”
You try but mostly fail, in hiding your laughter at her quick witted sense of humor. “Ellie,” you say her name again. “You can’t just hide out in here with the horses every single day, you know,” you point out, dropping your heavy satchel bag onto the ground. Stella lowers her head and gives it a sniff, no doubt smelling those apples you always carried around with you.
“Wanna bet?” The teenager quips with a small joking smirk as she sits up, tossing her comic book to the side. Bits of hay stick out of her brown hair, which she always keeps tied back in a messy ponytail.
“Aren’t you supposed to be in school with the other kids?”
She rolls her eyes. “I already went to school. Back in the Boston QZ. FEDRA’s finest, dude.”
You don’t know all that much about Ellie Williams—nor about the brooding older man that she’s here with, Joel Miller. The only thing you do know is that Joel happened to be Tommy Miller’s older brother and he acted as Ellie’s guardian. Initially, you’d thought he was her father, but Maria had told you that he had no familial relation to the girl, a fact that took you by complete surprise.
Their arrival in Jackson back during the winter season had the entire town talking—but by the following morning, the pair were gone, not to be seen again for several months until their return towards the end of spring just a couple of weeks ago. Rumors flew once the word of their return had gone around, but in reality, no one had the slightest clue about where they had gone or why they had left the safety of the commune’s walls in the first place. Not even Maria, who had failed in getting her husband to talk. She swore up and down Tommy knew something she didn’t, but he refused to spill his brother’s secrets, even to his own wife.
Like everyone else in the tight knit community, you were curious about Ellie, and you were especially curious about Joel. You’d seen him around a couple of times before, but hadn’t had the chance to meet him yet. Still, even without having spoken a single word to him, you already knew he wasn’t anything like Tommy, or anyone else you’ve ever encountered, really. A man of very few words, he kept to himself, just like Ellie did. Still, Joel knew he needed to find his place and pull his weight in Jackson just like everyone else, and once he began working patrol alongside Tommy, he finally began engaging with other members of the town. 
Reluctantly so, but at the very least, he was trying.
Ellie, on the other hand, avoided everybody at all costs. Everybody, that is, except for you.
Since their arrival, Ellie chose to spend her days in the stables. She’d hang out with the horses while reading her comic books or listening to tapes on some old Walkman she had permanently borrowed from Tommy. Despite a hectic schedule that kept you busy, you eventually started taking the time out of your day to talk to her. It had started off with light chatter about the most trivial of things—how the day was going, whether or not the weather was nice outside, what had been served for lunch in the mess hall that afternoon. Ellie seemed almost annoyed with you at first, but after a couple of days, she’d quickly started warming up to you and by the end of the first week, she had started following you around the stables, joining you wherever you needed to be. The girl had taken a liking to you, but she was still quite guarded and careful, as if she were still testing the waters, figuring out whether or not you could be trusted.
You don’t mind that, though.
Little by little, simply by being kind to her and making the genuine effort to get to know her, you’re slowly beginning to chip away at her layers. There was still quite a long way to go if you ever wanted the teenager to completely open up to you, but you didn’t mind that either.
You’d be as patient with her as you needed to be.
You walk over to her. “Listen Ellie, as much as I really enjoy having you around me all the time, you really do need to make friends, you know.”
She blinks. “But you’re my friend.”
Even as you rephrase yourself, you can’t help but smile. “Friends your own age,” you remark, tucking the loose lock of your hair that had fallen loose from your dutch braid behind your ear. “You know, my husband, he has a niece named Dina. She’s about your age. I could introduce you to each other if you'd like?”
Ellie furiously shakes her head. “No.”
“Ellie—”
“Everyone around here looks at me like I’ve got two fucking heads or something. She probably fucking will too,” she mumbles. She pulls her knees up to her chest and wraps her arms around them. “I’d have an easier time fitting in around here if I was a fucking clicker.”
Chuckling, you gently shake your head at her.
By now, you’d pretty much gotten used to her rich and colorful vocabulary.
You crouch down in front of her. “Look Ellie, I know how hard it is not to fit in with others.”
“You?” Ellie blows a loud raspberry in complete disbelief. “No fucking way. I don’t believe that for one fucking second, sweet cheeks.”
“Hey, in case you didn’t know this, I haven’t always been this age,” you remind her, lightly swatting at the side of her knee with your hand. “I was fifteen once too.”
“Yeah, and you were probably little miss fucking perfect, just like you are now.” She rolls her brown eyes at you in a teasing manner. “I bet everyone just loved you.”
You swat at her knee again. “Oh, stop that. That couldn’t be any further from the truth,” you reply, wondering where this child had come up with the idea that you are, or had ever been perfect. “I was still living in one of the quarantine zones with my family when I was your age, Ellie. We were living in the Alburquerque QZ for quite a while before it got overrun by the infected. They had schools and everything, just like in Boston. My mother was a nurse, so she had the privilege of enrolling me in one of their better schools, a preparatory school—she had the hope that I’d become an officer so I could have a chance at a decent life.” You pause, noticing a strange glimmer flash in the girl’s eyes, but when she says nothing, you continue on, “So I got the absolute pleasure of going to school with a bunch of kids whose parents were officers and important higher ups in the zone. And let me tell you something, the world may have gone to complete shit, but teenagers can still be fucking assholes.”
Ellie throws her head back and laughs loudly. “Whoa! I never thought I’d hear you curse. I thought you were too fucking prim and proper for that.”
“I’m not all that prim and proper,” you counter, grinning at the way she continues to cackle. “Besides, spending all this time with you might just have me cursing like a fucking sailor by the end of the week.”
“Fuck yeah it will,” she agrees with a nod. 
You grin again, but when your eyes meet Ellie’s, it falters slightly.
Ellie hadn’t told you much of anything about her past, but one thing was for certain—the young girl had been through hell and back. You could see it written all over her face, even when she smiled and even when she laughed. The traces of terror, pain, and trauma were quite subtle, but they were very much present and in recent nights, you’d find yourself lying in bed, wide awake and wondering what all this poor child had gone through in her life. Thoughts about what Ellie had seen, what and who she had lost in this world haunted you.
She’s different. 
What she’d been through made her different.
It set her apart from the other children, especially those who don’t know what it’s like to live a life outside these four walls.
It pained you to know that she felt ostracized when you were willing to bet your life that whatever had happened to her, it hadn’t been her fault.
Ellie Williams wasn’t your responsibility—you hardly know her. But you already care about her. An inexplicable soft spot for her had found its way into your heart from your very first interaction with her. If there’s anything you can do to help her ease into this new way of life, you’ll gladly do so without hesitation.  
“So then,” Ellie finally says after a minute, looking up at you. “Is it, uh, is it alright if I keep coming to the stables to spend time with you and the horses?”
“Of course.” You rise to your feet and glance at Stella. “But only on one condition. You have to help me out with the grooming. I’ve been really short handed lately and could use the extra help. Deal?”
She jumps up to her feet, eagerly nodding her head. “Deal.”
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Joel dumps his plastic tray and used dishware into the designated dirty dish bin before shoving his way through the doors of the mess hall. The air outside is still relatively cool, it’s crisp and fresh—but the temperatures are sure to get a hell of a lot warmer now that summer has officially arrived. Not that he minded.
He keeps his sights set straight ahead of him, doing his best to avoid eye contact with anyone who so much as even throws a glimpse in his direction.
People seem to be getting to him, but oftentimes, he still feels like a pariah. It’s almost like he’s some fucking feral stray cat that Jackson had adopted and taken into it’s home, willing to tame him, but still afraid that he could start tearing shit up at any given moment if they didn’t keep a close enough eye on him. He could handle that, though. It’s his Ellie he’s worried about. Between the survivor’s guilt she’d been dealing with on a daily basis and the way she was looked at in the community by everyone, Joel feared for her well being. He could only hope that Tommy was right about her just needing time and that eventually, she’ll find her place and he’ll have the chance to give her the most normal life possible under the circumstances. 
It’s the very least Joel could do for her after all she’d been through in the last year—after what he’d done, how he had lied straight to her face. He fucking owed her that much.
Ellie deserved happiness, and he would do just about anything in his power to give it to her.
Joel arrives at the horse stables and makes his way inside. “Ellie?” He calls out her name. “Ellie? You in here?”
That’s when he hears her voice. 
“Wait, what? Stella’s pregnant? I didn’t fucking know that!”
Rounding the corner into the very last stall, Joel sees Ellie standing there, her tiny little hand on the muzzle of a brown horse. In her opposite hand, she’s holding a mane brush. She isn’t alone.
He’s surprised to see you standing there beside her, your hands planted on your hips. You’re wearing a pair of well worn light wash blue jeans, the legs tucked into a pair of weathered black riding boots whose soles are completely caked with muck. Joel remembers you wearing an oversized, long sleeved red flannel shirt back in the mess hall, but it’s now off and tied around your waist, leaving you in a thin, cotton white tank top—the material fits snug on your frame, and Joel tries his hardest not to stare at the patch of bare skin that peeks between the hem of your shirt and the waistband of your jeans.
Christ.
You’re even more beautiful up close.
Fuckin’ get a grip, Miller, he thinks silently to himself.
“She sure is,” you reply to her question with a wide grin. “We just found out about a week ago and believe she’s about a few weeks along. We’ll have a sweet new baby in a year.”
“What? No fucking way!” Ellie exclaims, looking thoroughly excited, but bewildered by the fact. “Horses are pregnant for a whole year? Holy shit man, that’s fucking nuts!”
“Well, for eleven months,” you clarify for her, giving Stella a gentle, but firm pat on her muscular neck. “This is Stella’s first one. We’re hoping for a smooth pregnancy that reaches full term, but sometimes babies decide to come a bit sooner than expected.”
Curiously, Joel’s lips part and his eyes widen slightly.
He can’t fucking believe it.
Ellie hadn’t spoken a single word to anyone in two weeks and yet here she is, engaging with you so easily and so effortlessly, cracking the first genuine smile he’d seen since they had fed that giraffe back in Salt Lake City. More than that, Ellie is being herself, cursing up a storm and all, and you don’t seem the slightest bit bothered by it, not like the other adults whose jaws would drop in utter horror at her use of such foul language.
Joel wills himself to move and steps inside of the stall. He lightly clears his throat. “Ellie.”
You and Ellie both turn around, glancing in his direction.
“Joel? What are you doing here?” she asks, her smile fading slightly.
“Lookin’ for you. It’s lunchtime. Y’need to go eat somethin’ kiddo.”
She holds up the brush in her hand. “But we were just about to—”
He stops her with a stern glare. “Lunch. Now. Go.”
“Fine,” Ellie huffs and rolls her eyes at him. Picking up her red and tan backpack from the ground, she hands you the mane brush and stomps out of the stall, roughly shoving into Joel’s shoulder as she pushes past him without another word.
Joel glances at you, a sudden wave of awkwardness washing over him. Just as he’s about to politely excuse himself and leave, you speak.
“You’re Tommy’s older brother, right? Joel?”
He nods. “Yeah. I am.”
Stepping away from Stella, you walk over to Joel and introduce yourself, extending a hand for him to shake.
Your name is as beautiful as you are and it sounds heavenly when he repeats it, rolling smoothly off his tongue. He takes your hand in his own and the contrast between the two is stark. Your hand is soft against his rough, small compared to his large, but somehow still an all too perfect fit.
“It’s nice to finally meet you, Joel.” Your eyes find his, meeting them in a way that makes something inside of him that had been sleeping for decades now stir itself awake—it’s a feeling that’s too foreign for him to pinpoint. 
Realizing he’s been holding onto your hand longer than necessary, he drops it and takes a step back, lightly bumping his back against the stall door. “I’m—uh, I’m real sorry ‘bout Ellie,” Joel apologizes to you after a minute. “I know she’s been spendin’ a lot of time in here. I hope she hasn’t been botherin’ you or gettin’ in the way of things. If she is, I’ll have a talk with her.”
“No, no. Of course not. She hasn’t been bothering me at all,” you quickly assure him without missing a beat. “I’m usually in here alone, so it’s actually been really nice having her around. I enjoy her company a lot.”
“You do?”
You toss him a puzzled, but amused look. “Is that so strange?”
Joel places his hands on his hips and leans back against the stall door. “Ellie’s been havin’ a little trouble,” he confesses. “Adjustin’ to life here and meetin’ people. She, uh—she ain’t like all the other kids around here, y’know?”
“I know.”
His eyebrows raise to his hairline—exactly how well had you and Ellie gotten to know each other already? What all had she told you? What did you know about her?
What did you know about him?
Joel tries to mask the concern on his face.
“I was just talking to her a little while ago. I told her I know how hard it is being a teenager and trying to fit it in with the crowd, even in a world like this one.” You let out a humorless laugh and shake your head, the ridiculousness of what you’d just said sounding sillier out loud than it had in your mind. “It’s even harder when you’re just so different.” You detect the way that your statement triggers something of a negative response from Joel—the way his eyes darken in a flash of anger and his nostrils flare slightly tell you he doesn’t take all too kindly to anyone talking negatively about his kid. Ellie being different is something that he already knows, of course, but hearing it from someone else isn’t easy for him, and it certainly isn’t welcome. It puts him right into protective mode and you don’t blame him, not in the slightest. You hold your hands up and reassure him, “There’s nothing wrong with being different, by the way.”
Joel sees the sincerity in your eyes that go hand in hand with your words and his defenses switch off almost as quickly as they’d switched on. “There isn’t,” he agrees with a careful nod of his head. “Nothin’ wrong with it at all.” He clears his throat. “M’sorry, I didn’t mean to—it’s just that I don’t really like it when people start runnin’ their mouths ‘bout my kid, that’s all.”
Waving a hand, you assure him, “No need to apologize at all, Joel.”
Little by little, he starts relaxing. Taut and tense muscles that have been wound up for years and years are suddenly beginning to loosen. All it’s taking is being in your presence and talking to you. Joel suddenly understands why Ellie’s taken such a quick liking to you. 
You’re unlike anyone that either of them had ever met before. You’re bright and you bring about this warmth—a different kind of warmth Joel hadn’t felt in so fucking long. It feels like seeing the sun for the very first time after spending years and years trapped in a cold, cold darkness.
He glances around the stall. “So, uh—what’s the deal? You one of the stable hands around here or somethin’ like that?”
“Something like that,” you repeat after him, a tiny grin tugging at the corners of your mouth at the way he speaks with a heavy, but still incredibly charming Southern drawl. “I’m the veterinarian here in Jackson.”
He chuckles. “Y’mean, those still exist?”
“Sort of. My father used to be the veterinarian here,” you explain to him. “That was what he did for a living before the outbreak happened. We lived in New Mexico on a horse ranch when I was growing up—he started off as a stable hand and then he went back to school to become an equine veterinarian. When we got here a few years ago from one of the quarantine zones, he told Maria what he had done for a living before this and he was asked to care for the horses in exchange for our place here.”
“And you?” Joel can’t help but wonder out loud. You seem quite young, can’t be older than your late twenties or early thirties at most, which would still have made you a child when the outbreak happened. “No offense darlin’ but you seem a little bit too young to have gone to vet school before shit hit the fan.”
Darlin’.
He doesn’t mean to call you that. But it’s too late—and you don’t appear bothered by it.
Instead, you laugh, and the sound is like a gorgeous melody he could listen to on repeat for the rest of his life if given the chance. “No, I definitely did not go to veterinary school. Actually, my dad taught me everything I know.” You speak fondly of him as you continue to say, “He educated me. Well, as best as he could considering the circumstances and all. He gave me a ton of books that I could read and study from, but most of it was hands-on training. He tried to teach me all that he could before he died a couple of years ago.”
Joel frowns. “Oh. Sorry to hear ‘bout your dad.”
“It’s alright. You don’t have to be sorry.”
He peers at you, wondering what had happened to him. 
“He died of illness,” you tell him, as if having read his mind. “Cancer, we think it was, but we obviously can’t know for sure without proper testing. And before you say it again, you don’t have to be sorry.” You cross your arms over your chest, tilting your head at him as you change the subject and ask, “So, how are you settling in?”
“S’been alright, I reckon. Real different from what I’m used to—from what we’re both used to,” Joel answers, referring to Ellie.
“I can imagine it is. It took me a while to get used to this place when I first got here too. It’s such a different way of life, especially when you lived under FEDRA control for so long,” you empathize with him, sighing as you drop your arms back down at your sides. “You stay just a couple of houses down from Tommy and Maria, right?”
“Yeah, we’re two doors down in the brown and greenish lookin’ unit.”
“I’m in the light blue and white cottage right across from them,” you inform him, your pretty eyes twinkling as you give him a smile. “I guess that kind of makes us neighbors, doesn’t it?”
Joel’s stomach somersaults.
If you didn’t stop smiling at him like that, there was going to be a problem.
“It does,” he manages to say. Remembering Tommy’s warning from earlier, he decides it would be best for him to leave—and the quicker, the better because he’s beginning to notice how fucking easy it is to fall under your spell. He pushes himself away from the stall door. “I should probably get goin’ now. Got evenin’ patrol,” he says. “Listen, uh, I really appreciate you spendin’ time with Ellie and bein’ so kind to her. Thank you for that.” He gives you a small grateful nod and turns on the heel of his boot to leave the stall.
“Joel?”
He stops dead in his tracks, his back stiffening slightly.
The sound of your soft voice saying his name is sweet like pure, raw honey.
If he isn’t careful, he’ll become addicted to it—he fears he already is.
Swallowing harshly, Joel turns back around to face you. “Yeah?”
“We’re having this big get together tomorrow night in the barn that’s right across the way,” you say, jabbing a thumb over your shoulder. Through the small round window in the stall, he can see the very barn you’re talking about. “We do it every single year on the first day of summer. We do it for the kids more than anything, but everyone comes out.” There’s a subtle hint of shyness to your tone. “I’m not sure if Tommy or Maria have mentioned it to you yet, but there’s going to be a big barbecue, drinks, and even dancing. The whole nine yards.”
Joel has to bite back a small scoff of disbelief. “You serious?”
“Hey, the world might have ended, but people still know how to get down and party,” you joke. You observe the genuinely perplexed look that crosses his face and giggle. “I know it must sound really bizarre. But it’s a lot of fun and it’s a great way to really get to know the folks around here. I think it would be great if you and Ellie both came.”
“Ain’t too sure if it’d be Ellie’s thing. Or mine,” he admits, raking a hand nervously through his hair at the thought.
“You won’t know unless you give it a shot, Joel.” You gift him with another brilliant smile that just about makes his heart stop inside his chest. “Please?”
Joel hardly knows you.
Hell, up until five minutes ago, he hadn’t even known your fucking name—how is it possible that he can’t say no to you? A complete fucking stranger?
He thinks about it. He doesn’t like the idea of having to interact with anyone outside of his patrol duties, but if going to the damn thing means seeing you again, then he’s willing to at the very least give it a shot. 
“Maybe we’ll both stop by for a bit and check it out,” he finally replies, exhaling a sigh of defeat.
“Great!” You beam happily. “I’ll see you tomorrow night, then!”
“I’ll see you tomorrow night,” Joel repeats, giving you one last nod before turning and leaving the stall.
As he leaves the stables and heads home, he can’t help the way the corners of his mouth threaten to turn upwards at the mere thought of seeing you tomorrow night. 
Shit.
Yeah, he’s in fucking trouble. 
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3K notes · View notes
seumyo · 2 months
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SAKUSA KIYOOMI ✰ 8:56
NOTE. I am now proposing Haikyuu boys with their Oldest (or Older) sister! Reader and how that dynamic goes . . inspired by this TikTok video.
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Sakusa Kiyoomi, when had too many drinks at the post-wedding reception of his oldest sister, is a whole different person when completely sober. And in the rare times that he does get drunk (to no one’s surprise, he’s actually lightweight), he gets a little (a little is an understatement) sentimental and vulnerable.
It just happens; it’s not like he has any control over his raw emotions.
“What was that?” Motoya asks his cousin.
Kiyoomi had been sobbing for half an hour now, his cheeks blooming with a slight rosy hue and his eyes brimming with tears as he wiped them away with his hands—like how a crying toddler would. “Onee-san got married,” he cried through muffled hiccups.
“She’s going to start her own family.”
“And what’s gonna happen?”
“We’re never going to see each other again.”
This side of Kiyoomi was definitely quality entertainment. He rarely ever held his heart and emotions on his sleeves, but tonight was a particular exception. But then again, it was a little surprising how attached he was to his oldest sister considering how big their age gap was.
It could be that, among his siblings, the oldest of the four practically raised Kiyoomi. His older sister and brother were always too busy to play with him because of the obvious difference in their ages as well as their different developmental stages. When Kiyoomi was four, his older sister was ten, his older brother was twelve, and you—his oldest sister—were sixteen at that time.
You were always the one to entertain him whenever you got home from school, spend time with him in the manor’s library, and encourage him to make new friends (before Motoya came along and visited more often) so he wouldn’t be as lonely as he used to. So it was natural that he was much closer to you than his own parents.
“Do you want to say bye again?” Motoya suggested.
“No,” Kiyoomi sniffled, shaking his head. “I already did, it would be too awkward...”
Back in the hotel room, Motoya and Kiyoomi’s older brother—Kino—made sure he didn’t randomly collapse on the way back. They didn’t have to worry about that because Kiyoomi was quite compliant and just kept on talking about how he was going to miss you.
And of course, Kino, being the teasing little shit he was at his grown age, decided to film Kiyoomi’s confessions.
“I’m going to miss Nee-san,” he murmured.
At this point, Motoya and Kino thought that Kiyoomi’s tears were almost at an end, but the whole dam broke when Kino asked, “What’s going to happen to Nee-san?”
“She got married.”
“But that’s how it is—“
“But she’s going to leave the house!” Kiyoomi added, unknowingly folding the freshly ironed blankets the hotel staff provided earlier when they asked for another one. “She was the one who got me to play volleyball,” he said. 
“I never listened to what she had to say because she was annoying sometimes, and now I’m going to miss it.”
“Aw, Kiyo!” Kino chuckled. “That’s how it is; she’s bound to start a family of her own eventually.”
But Kiyoomi couldn’t stomach the fact that he had a little too much to drink. He didn’t understand—he couldn't wrap his head around the fact that he would no longer see you when he went home during the weekends if he didn’t have practice; he wouldn’t have to argue with you anymore on who would wash the dishes after supper; he wouldn’t have you cook his favorite dishes anymore.
You wouldn’t come home anymore. You wouldn’t be visiting as often as he’d hoped you would. You wouldn’t visit his games as often as you could because of your job.
The thoughts he was having were antagonizing. They made him feel small and vulnerable, and that familiar feeling of loneliness from his childhood lingers around in the form of a throbbing headache the next morning. Kiyoomi struggles to get through his hangover, but he does his best.
He stares at the mirror in his hotel room’s bathroom, then gets eye drops on his obviously red and still puffy eyes. How much did he cry last night? He doesn’t even remember anything. Kiyoomi doesn’t want to remember if it’s embarrassing. He’d much rather crawl in a hole and never resurface.
Then he sees a message from you.
[video attachment]
Aww, sleep tight, Kiyo :((
Don’t forget that I’ll always be your sister even if we don’t share the same last name anymore or even if I’m not around as often as I wished I could! You could always visit us, ok? Just text me if you need anything!
And just like that, Kiyoomi’s in tears once again.
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SEUMYO © 2024, PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, PLAGIARIZE, MODIFY OR TRANSLATE.
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authorhjk1 · 9 months
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Interlude: Lonely
IU X Miyeon X Male Reader
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You have walked past her table a couple of times already. It's not unusual to drink while having dinner, she is an adult after all. But the amount she is consuming starts to concern you. One bottle of soju after another finds its place on her table.
When you walk past her once again, to greet someone whom you haven't talked to yet, you decide to sit down. In that moment, someone else enters your restaurant. You stand there for a moment, wondering what's going on.
Her black dress is slightly gleaming in the light. It's quite short and her rather big boots compliment it well. She isn't wearing a necklace. Only a couple pearl rings and a handbag. Her black hair completes that dark look she has going on.
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When your eyes meet, you remember you are in a public place. There is no official reason for the both of you to know each other. And yet Choi Miyeon has that look on her face already. That look that tells you what she wants you to do to her tonight.
Distracted, you don't realize that you have been standing next to the other idol, whom you were concerned about earlier.
"Why are you standing here? I didn't order anything."
Her drunk voice sounds kinda cute, although her outfit isn't. She is going for the same look as the vixen, who just sat down at a table nearby. Dark and sexy.
Her eyes are only half open as she stares at you.
"You know what? Bring me another bottle?"
She points with her finger at you, but it sways slightly and it looks like she wants to hypnotize you.
"Ms Lee. Why don't you go back to your hotel?"
You ask in a polite tone, but she waves you off.
"No no no. My room is empty. I don't want to be empty."
She scoffs before downing another glass of soju.
You weren't prepared for drunk talk tonight, but she is still your customer. When she appeared a few hours ago, you were surprised, but then you remember the brand, which you buy your soju from.
Lee Ji-eun, aka IU, decided to check out your restaurant, when she heard of its opening.
"Ms Lee. Can you tell me where your manager is?"
If you can't get her home, he probably can.
"Don't call me that."
She furrows her brows as she leans her head on her forearms, which are resting on the table. Her chef for her table left a while ago, so the two of you are alone.
"Just Ji. Or IU. I'm alone anyways."
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She murmurs into the sleeves of her jacket.
"Fine. IU then. It's late already, don't you want to have some sleep? I'm sure you are tired."
"No no no."
She raises her hand and waves to decline your idea.
"My bed is empty. I don't want to."
"It's empty since you aren't in it."
"I'm empty."
You sigh as you rub your face. The whole day has been hectic and stressful.
"How about I bring you home?"
IU focuses on you, at least she is trying to, and eyes you suspiciously.
"You-You wanna play?"
You raise your eyebrow.
"What?"
"You wanna play?"
She giggles before trying to one shot another glass. Most of the clear liquid falls onto the table, some stains her top.
"What kind of game?"
IU shakes her head, which obviously makes her feel dizzy afterwards.
"You don't know. No no no."
You sigh, before asking the inevitable.
"What don't I know?"
"What-What we play. I never have someone to play."
"Don't you have friends?"
You feel like you are talking to a twelve year old who just took some painkillers.
"They don't play with me."
She mumbles on and pouts cutely as she slightly lifts her head.
"They only play with each other. Or with guys."
The last part was definitely filled with bitterness and annoyance.
"Guys don't want to play with me either. Why not?"
She looks at you, her eyes still barely open.
"Why don't boys play with me?"
You are starting to realize what she is saying. And you also realize where this is heading.
"Am I not cute?"
She pushes the empty green bottles away from her and you realize IU is recreating one of her commercials. At least she is trying to.
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You do have to say so that drunk IU isn't as cute as her sober counterpart.
"Or am I not sexy enough?"
It takes her a moment to focus on you and open her eyes completely. But when she does, she looks stunning.
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The Korean singer is older than you. Quite a few years actually. You weren't really into older women before, but IU? You can see why guys would be tempted.
"You are one gorgeous woman."
You smile at her, hoping this will lift her mood.
"Then why don't you do it?"
She gives you a groggy smile and sways that finger of hers again.
"Why don't you play with me?"
"You are drunk, IU."
She shakes her head.
"No no no. Not drunk. T-Tipsy."
She nods as if she is trying to convince herself.
"Yes, yes. Tipsy."
You lean back in your seat, trying to come up with a plan to get this woman in a bed. It doesn't have to be yours, but if she would be to sober up on the way, you wouldn't be complaining.
"Excuse me, sir."
You close your eyes in disbelief as you recognize the voice. Turning around, you see Miyeon standing behind you.
"May I talk to you for a moment? It's-"
You can see her struggling to come up with some excuse. Luckily, almost all of the media is already gone.
"It's about the cucumbers."
She looks surprised at herself at that idiotic comment. One might think that she is hammered too.
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You glare at her, but she eventually convinces you with her suggestive glance towards your crotch. Cucumbers my ass.
About to stand up, you see IU lift her head, which dropped back onto her arms a couple of moments ago.
"You."
She looks at Miyeon.
"He wants to play with me. Why are you taking him?"
Miyeon ignores her and drags you a couple of steps away.
You don't know how Miyeon did it. But you find yourself walking down the sidewalk, IU holding onto your arm. She is less drunk already. The pill that Miyeon gave her, some water and the cool Paris night seem to sober her up.
"I apologize for making you bring me to my hotel."
You shake your head as you look down the empty street.
"It is closing time soon, anyways."
"Thank you, though."
She squeezes your arm gently.
"What did you mean earlier?"
IU looks at you with worry.
"What did I say?"
"You said you are lonely."
"Ah."
She nods as the two of you keep walking.
"I am. I sometimes have the feeling that no one is interested in me."
You stay silent as she keeps talking.
"I can never really have a boyfriend. Or girlfriend."
She whispered that last word, but you managed to hear it.
"It must be hard since you are a celebrity. But I'm sure you will find someone you love eventually."
To your surprise, IU shakes her head.
"That's not what I want right now."
She looks up into your eyes.
"Oh."
You look away and keep walking in silence.
"I just want to-"
She looks around the empty street, before getting on her tiptoes.
"-get fucked."
She stares at you once more.
You are about to say something, having Miyeon's plan still in the back of your head, but the Korean actress looks away.
"I'm jealous of all the girl groups, you know? They maybe don't have boyfriends, but at least each other."
She sighs and you realize she isn't completely sober yet.
"Imagine if you were in a nine member group. All of their hands on your body."
Her voice sounds dreamy and you stay quiet, but not because you are polite.
"Their fingers on your skin. All of them taking turns kissing you..."
She trails off and looks into the night.
You curse silently, glancing at your pants.
As if she has done this a million times, IU lets her hand slide down your arm and locks her fingers with yours.
"As much as I love younger girls eating me out, I love younger guys fucking my brains out more."
The two of you come to halt and you can't say a word. Until now, she was as subtle as possible. Now she is just saying out loud what she is thinking.
"Do you know how long it has been since I sucked cock?"
She takes a step closer, her eyes partially covered by her bangs.
"I would give anything for a nice dick in my pussy right now."
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As soon as the elevator doors close, IU pulls your head down. She captures your lips with hers and you can still taste some of the soju she drank earlier.
As the taste and her scent start to take over your senses, you realize she smells like strawberries. Her lips, which have a similar color, are soft and sweet as you invade her mouth with your tongue.
Your make out session is interrupted when the doors open again, but IU takes your hand and drags you after her. She almost runs to her room, before she uses the key card to open the door.
As she is about to step inside, you pin her against the doorframe. You feel her bite your lip as you push your tongue inside her mouth once more. Holding her hands in yours, you take the key card and let it fall to the ground, right outside the room.
The two of you stumble towards her bed as you kick the door shut behind you. Afraid you are gonna hurt her, you make sure she is on top as the two of you hit the sheets. IU is lying on top of you, her bangs slightly tickling your forehead as she keeps her lips on yours.
As you stroke her hair, you feel her hands running down your body with one particular goal. Making quick work of your belt, she doesn't stop kissing you. Your own hands run down her naked lower back and hold onto her butt, locking her in place.
"Let me go."
She smiles into the kiss as she tuggs at the waistband of your boxers.
"I can do more with these lips than kissing."
You let her cheeks go and you feel her glide down your body. Raising your hips, you see IU taking off your pants.
"This was worth the wait."
Her eyes sparkle with satisfaction as she sees your cock. She reaches out with both hands, before she starts to stroke you. One at the bottom, one at the top. You feel yourself harden immediately at her work. She does seem skilled, although she said she doesn't have much sex.
Opening her mouth, IU lets some spit fall off her tongue and onto your tip. She spreads it around your tip with her thumb.
"This looks delicious."
She gives you a big smile, before she leans down. Her upper hand is replaced by her warm mouth. Slowly, her lips glide along the length of your shaft.
You reach out to hold her hair as IU gives you one of the best blowjobs you ever had. Her skillful tongue does not miss a spot as she lets it roam all over your cock. Her lips are sealed tight around you, making her cheeks hollow. While her right hand is still holding the base of your cock, the left one is sliding upwards, underneath your shirt.
IU can feel your abs with her hand as she keeps taking your cock into her mouth. You almost think that she doesn't have a gag reflex at all. Your tip reaches the back of her throat. The black haired woman takes it with ease as she has almost all of your cock in her mouth.
Once she reaches your base with her lips, she does choke slightly. She looks up, before moving her head in a circular motion, which makes you groan. Your cock still deep inside her throat.
"Fuck, you are good."
IU slowly moves her head upwards, letting your dick out of her mouth.
"This is nothing."
She gives you a naughty smile.
"I could suck you off with my eyes closed."
"Is that so?"
She winks at you and resumes her blowjob. You have to close your eyes momentarily as she works wonders on your cock. A few moments later, you are able to untie your blue tie. Reaching forward, you place it on her eyes, before tying it at the back of her head.
"What is this?"
IU chuckles.
"You said you could do this with your eyes closed."
You glance at the door as you see it open quietly.
"You bet. As long as I have a cock in my throat, I don't care if I can see or not."
The woman who just entered the room bites her lip at the older woman's comment.
Afraid that IU would catch on, you guide her head back towards your dick. When her lips touch your tip, a smile plays around them, before she obediently opens her mouth. As your cock glides into her mouth, you see Miyeon staring.
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As if she forgot what she is here for. You point with your free hand towards her small sports bag she brought with her, which snaps Miyeon out of her trance.
She puts it down quietly, but all that can be heard in this room right now are IU's sucking sounds.
The younger woman opens her bag quickly, taking out a long, black object.
Unbeknownst to IU, Miyeon hooks her thumbs underneath the straps of her dress, before letting it fall to the ground. That she isn't wearing a bra was obvious before, but you can now see that she isn't wearing underwear either.
While IU still works on your cock, you watch Miyeon idly playing with her clit. She rubs it with two of her fingers as she watches the two of you.
"Miyeon!"
You mouth in her direction.
It takes her a couple of moments to tear her eyes away from your cock, which is currently resting inside IU's throat.
She winks at you, before reaching for the black object and something else inside the bag. When she said she brought some toys, you just shrugged it off. But it looks like Miyeon has a whole arsenal with her.
You watch her putting on the black strap on, while holding a bottle of lube.
"You are so quiet. Did you pass out already?"
IU chuckles at your attempt to keep quiet.
"You would need to work harder for that."
"Fine."
She sticks her tongue out mockingly, before letting more spit drop out of her mouth.
"Let's see who passes out first."
She wraps her lips around your cock once again.
As IU deep throats your dick, Miyeon is slowly walking towards the bed. She already opened the small glassy bottle in her hand. She is slowly stroking the long strap on with her slick hand. If you saw it correctly, the lower part of her toy is resting inside her own pussy, around four inches, while the rest is for her to use on her sunbae. It's around your own length, but yours is slightly bigger.
IU is still chocking on your cock. It looks like she is determined to make you pass out, or at least make you cum. Either way, she keeps you down her throat, not letting an inch miss any attention.
You have to hold onto a fistful of her dark hair, while your left hand is grabbing the sheets. IU is not joking around when it comes to blowjobs.
You watch Miyeon as she is now standing right behind the bed. In one swift motion she reaches forward and takes a hold of the older girl's pants' waistband.
"What?"
IU's surprised yelp is muffled by your cock down her throat. You force her head in place. Miyeon starts to take off her pants. IU struggles against the two of you.
"Stay put."
You force her lips to reach your base once more.
"You said you want attention."
Once IU has calmed down, Miyeon finally manages to rid her off her pants.
"Wow, unnie. Your pussy looks so pretty."
She purrs, before getting onto the bed herself.
You see IU relaxing as she realizes that the other girl is someone she knows. She just doesn't know who it is yet. In her blindfolded state, she is forced to only react to both of your touches. Miyeon holds onto her waist, making her rise her butt. She is now in this "demon pose" position. You can see the shape of her plump ass behind her head from your point of view.
"Fuck. Your body."
You see IU smile around your cock.
It's quickly replaced by a moan as you watch Miyeon spit on her hand, before reaching between the older girl's legs.
A couple of moans and seconds later, you can already see Miyeon aligning her strap on with IU's snatch.
You are kinda jealous, especially after Miyeon's comment.
The older girl's mouth forms an O shape as she gets penetrated by the plastic strap on. Your wet cock falls out of her mouth.
"Holy fuck."
"Do you like this, unnie?"
"I love it."
IU sighs as she holds onto the base of your dick once more. She guides your tip towards her mouth. Pushing her head down, you watch IU getting two of her wholes stuffed with cock. Although you can't see it, you can tell that her eyes are closed in bliss.
Miyeon moves her hips back and forth, letting the strap on slide in and out of IU's cunt. With every thrust forward, the older girl gets pushed forward, which forces your cock deeper down her throat.
Your head rests against the hotel room wall as you try to keep your composure. Even with a dildo in her pussy, IU is still sucking the life out of you. Her mouth trying it's best to make you cum. Your hand in her hair tugs at it occasionally, making her stop for just a moment. There are plenty of moments, where you think you are about to cum. But luckily, you manage to make her stop just at the right time.
"Your cock is so big now."
IU's words are interrupted by another one of her moans.
"I know you are going to cum."
She uses your tip to smear all your pre cum over her lips.
"Just give it to me already."
She takes you into her mouth again. Determined to make you cum now.
Looking behind her, you watch Miyeon slowly fucking IU from behind. Her own eyes are closed, the other end of the strap on obviously pleasuring her more than she would like to admit. Her hips roll back and forth, letting the plastic move in and out of IU's snatch.
"Come on, baby. Cum in my mouth."
The older girl makes you focus on her again. You have to hold onto her head with both hands, due to the pleasure she is sending through your system. You didn't plan on cuming so fast. But here you are.
As IU deep throats your cock, you hold her in place with both hands. Her lips almost reaching the end of your cock. You feel her gagging slightly. The muscles of her throat tighten around you. The slight shoves from Miyeon make her move around you. She humms slightly, when Miyeon hits the right spot.
"I'm gonna cum."
You groan as you feel IU's hands wander towards your abs once more. She isn't leaving room for her hands on your cock anyway.
Her gags become louder. As Miyeon gives her a big thrust from behind, you finally cum down IU's throat. You push her head further down as you feel her moan. Ropes of your cum coat her throat and mouth from the inside.
It takes you a couple of moments to recover from IU's blowjob. You just lie on the bed, enjoying the view of her getting softly pounded by Miyeon. You realize that she still doesn't know, who is fucking her.
The same thought runs through Ji-eun's head at the same time. She was surprised at first, to say the least. And although the strap on doesn't compare to a real cock, it's still a nice feeling to get filled in two holes at the same time. As you are now recovering, your cock resting in her hands, Ji-eun tries to guess who is fucking her. It's hard, since she sometimes loses her train of thought, whenever the girl behind her is hitting the right spot. She called her unnie, right? It can't be Yoo In-Na then, since she is older. Plus, she would have recognized her voice.
Lee Ahin maybe? But she would have called her "sunbaenim" respectfully. But it still could be her. Ji-eun remembers, that she was jealous the way Ahin looked at you occasionally from across the room.
You see Miyeon bite her lip, as a moan escapes her mouth. You never expected to be in this situation. And you never expected Miyeon to come up with this idea.
Watching her pleasuring herself and IU with her strap on makes your cock hard again. The older girl's hands aren't very innocent either though.
As she realizes that you are ready for round two, IU takes you into her mouth once more. You are still a little more sensitive than usual. You groan as she does her best to make your cock as hard as possible. Her body still being rocked back and forth by Miyeon.
"Daddy, you should try this pussy."
Miyeon sighs, her half opened eyes focused on you.
"I think this unnie is hungry for your cock in her little cunt."
The way IU moans at the younger girl's comment makes you slowly guide her head off your cock.
Her eyes are still covered, which means she still can't see what you are doing. You get off the bed and walk over to Miyeon. Capturing her lips with yours, you make the younger girl come to halt. The two of you enjoy each other's mouths.
Glancing downwards, you have a good view on IU's pussy. It's visibly stretched out by Miyeon's black dildo. Her lower lips are tightly wrapped around it. You can see some of her slick juices running down her inner thighs as she is still in the same position as before. You reach out to knead her left ass cheek.
"What are you waiting for? Give it to me."
She moans as she looks over her shoulder, eyes still covered by your tie.
You push against the left side of her hips, which makes her fall on her back on the bed. Miyeon left her pussy just a second earlier and now you are standing between her legs.
You admire IU's beautiful pussy. Her pink, plump lips glisten slightly. Her clit is slightly visible and her skin around it is as smooth as the rest of her body.
Unable to resist, you lean down to have a taste. You taste some of her juices as you lick her pussy lips.
"Oh, fuck."
IU moans. She expected your cock, not your tongue.
Standing straight again, you hold her waist with both hand. Nodding towards the bottle of lube, you instruct Miyeon to use it. A mischievous smile appears on her face. While she opens it and pours some of the liquid onto the strap on, you pick IU up. She instinctively wraps her legs around you, still not having a clue about what's about to happen. Her arms are reaching around your neck and her face is right in front of yours. You move a little, so that Miyeon can stand behind her.
You place your hand on one of her firm butt cheeks, while the other reaches for your cock. Slowly, you insert yourself into her pussy.
"Oh god."
IU sighs as your tip enters her. Since she is way smaller than you, you have to slide her up and down on your cock. Now holding both of her cheeks in your hand, you slowly lower her further.
With every inch, IU's mouth opens wider. When she finally reaches your base, a loud moan escapes her mouth.
"Fuck you are so big."
Her walls are tight around you. Looking down, you see one of the most beautiful things you have ever seen. IU's pink lips molding around your cock, keeping it in her snatch.
Her head drops back as you make her lean away from you by pulling her ass towards you. She is now on the perfect night for Miyeon. The younger girl runs her fingers over IU's waist, before aligning her strap on with her hole.
Once the wet plastic touches her rear entrance, IU knows what's going on.
"Oh fuck! I have never dones this before."
You can tell she is squeezing her eyes shut as Miyeon starts to push inside of her. You feel her strap on press against your cock through the thin wall of IU's body. With every inch, the older woman breaths heavier, until she is completely filled.
Her black hair covers Miyeon's face as she is just hanging there between the two of you. She is completely defenseless. IU can't do anything but moan as you start to lift her up.
She has never felt so full. Both of her holes are stuffed with cock as she slides upwards. Since Miyeon is shorter than you, you have to stop lifting IU when you reach your own tip, otherwise the strap on would slide out. And whenever you push IU down, she can only take a third of Miyeon's dildo inside of her.
Despite these little flaws, the older girl still feels like she is in heaven. All of her muscles relax except the ones in her pussy and ass. Over and over you slowly lift her up and pull her down. After just a couple of moments, the Korean actress has become a stuttering mess.
"Oh! Fu-! Yes! Please more!"
Her back is now completely arched, her head resting on Miyeon's shoulder. Because IU is still wearing that black top, you can only dive into her neck. You kiss her skin as you make her moan in tandem with your moves.
After having found a rhythm that works for all of you, you start to go a little faster. The effect it has on IU is evident as her moans turn louder and her hands on your back hold you tighter. You hear Miyeon moan occasionally as well, whenever IU is pushed onto her strap on. It pushes it a little further into her own pussy everytime, giving her pleasure as well.
The older woman has now lost her ability to form words. Her moans are deep and drawn out. Her pussy feels incredible tight, partially because of Miyeon's strap on in her ass, which slightly pushes against your cock.
You hear IU whine as she starts to cum. Her body tenses up a little as she feels a flame burn through her body. It has been building up since Miyeon pulled her pants off. Now, she is cuming on your cock, her juices dribbling down onto the carpet.
You hiss as you feel IU's pussy contracting around you. The way she feels pushed you closer as well. You are able to hold out, until she calms down, but you know that you might not survive another orgasm of hers.
You keep your rhythm nonetheless, making IU moan loudly once more. Her eyes are still covered as she sees nothing but darkness. After that orgasm, the flame in her body doesn't die down. Instead, it keeps building again. The darkness is replaced by bright colors. You are quite literally making her see stars as you make IU cum for a second time.
She whines once more, too lust drunk to speak. At the same time, Miyeon moans. You guess it's not really about the stimulation for her, but the act itself. A small orgasm rushes through the younger girl's body, making her knees buckle.
Seeing the two of them cum, makes you want to do the same. For a second you wonder if you want to trade holes with Miyeon, but IU's pussy is something you can't pass up on. There is no way in hell you pull out, until you cum.
Up until now, the two of you fucked her with a rather slow, steady pace. Fast enough to make her cum, but still not with your usual force. You can feel the lust building up inside of you.
Miyeon looks like that as well, although she probably has something else in mind. Although the dildo inside of her makes her feel good, it's hard for her to cum. The two of you exchange glances, before you come to a silent agreement.
You lift IU up one last time, higher than before. It makes Miyeon's strap on slide out of her ass, while your tip still remains inside of her. You see your cock is slick with her juices. The younger girl hurries to unbuckle the belt of her strap on, before letting it fall to the ground. She jumps onto the bed, her hand already near snatch as she is ready to watch the end of the show.
Ji-eun is still wondering what's going on as she obviously feels Miyeon's strap on leave her ass. You kiss her neck once more as she is too tired to complain about the lack of fullness.
Your arms start to get tired, so you place her on the wooden dresser, which is standing near the bed. Her back is pressed against the cold wall as you push fully inside of her once more.
"Right there."
She sighs as you hit a new spot in this position. Looking behind you, you see Miyeon is already knuckle deep in her own pussy, eyes only half open. She decided that it's more pleasurable for her if she doesn't have to move so much. The fucking tiring her out.
Knowing that IU can't look at Miyeon, since you are blocking the view, you pull down your tie. It hangs loosely around her neck as you see her eyes after a long time. Her lust makes her look like she is angry. Her brown eyes focused on you as her upper lip slightly twitches.
"Now fuck me hard."
She demands, not even bothering to try and find out, who fucked her ass.
You bottom out inside of her as you start to pound her onto the wall.
"Faster!"
She has become more vocal, now that she can see. Maybe she was a little shy earlier, but now, she is enjoying herself too much to care.
"Fuck yes! Make the whole hotel hear!"
She moans loudly as you keep your pace. The dresser doesn't seem very safe. It starts to rock back and forth with your thrusts, hitting the wall occasionally. It creaks as you fuck IU on its smooth surface.
"Make them know that I'm getting pounded hard! Make them touch themselves!"
You fuck her faster, almost scared she is going to hit the wall with her head. Now that she can see, IU keeps her eyes on yours, capturing your gaze.
"I'm gonna cum."
It's hard to bring that sentence over your lips, but you can't stop it. It's like IU's pussy was made for only one purpose. To make you cum.
"Yeah! Give it to me!"
She moans louder, holding onto the shirt you are still wearing.
"Cum all over my pussy! Paint me with your cum!"
Holding onto her waist, you pull IU further onto your cock with every thrust. You hear Miyeon in the background, moaning and whining as she cums on her finger. The dresser sounds like it's going to collapse any minute as you fuck one of the most beautiful women on earth on its surface.
IU's face is close to yours and her lips find yours. The two of you kiss, without slowing down your pace.
Pulling back one last time, you thrust into IU as you feel yourself cuming. You regretfully leave her tight pussy. But she told you where she wants it.
As you climax, your cum starts to paint her pussy. It coats her puffy lips and her clit, some drops hitting her flat midriff.
"Fuck yes."
IU sighs as she feels your warm cum on her pussy. It slowly dribbles down along her lips and onto the wooden surface underneath her.
You capture IU's pink lips with your own as that strawberry taste invades your taste buds once more. Out of the corner of your eye, you see that Miyeon is already putting her dress back on.
IU will never know, who of her juniors made her ever feel so full. And loved.
------------------
(Alternative Ending)
Hi, everyone!
I hope you guys enjoyed this one. From now on, I will try to occasionally mix in these shorter interludes. This way, I can write smaller chapters, which I get expired by in random situations, or you can request scenarios, which aren't exactly compatible with the story. I will try my best to somehow fit them into the story, for example as a dream. These short chapters aren't really relevant for the plot, which means you can read them without the story, or if you don't like the idols, you can just skip them.
Have a great day!
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laiiaaa · 1 year
Text
THE PART WHERE YOU KISS ME — JJ MAYBANK
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summary: You're stuck with the job of getting a very drunk, very lovesick JJ into bed.
length: 2.4k
contains: tooth-rotting fluff, obsessed boyfriend JJ, soooo touchy he can't keep his hands off of you (can you tell my love language is physical touch lmfao???), mentions of heavy drinking of course, zero plot, he's a flirty little freak and i hate him
note: Not the happiest with this but I haven't posted in a week and I'm in the middle of writing three other pieces right now...so take this as an apology gift for not having the GFAW chapter out yet <3
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Driving to the Chateau this late is never ideal, especially when you’re tired and ticked off from a busy shift. Your feet and back ache, your head could use a few Advil, and you would be perfectly happy to stay home and sleep for twelve hours. 
But when Kie calls you, groaning and saying Your boyfriend is wasted and won’t shut up about you and you need to come pull him to bed, you go. It’s as simple as that, really. Partially because JJ is already painfully stubborn when sober and only gets worse as the night goes on (code for: he won’t listen to anyone but you), and partly because you get a sweet kick out of his clinginess and extra loving.
So when you finally pull up and hop out of your car, the sound of Pope sighing Finally doesn’t surprise nor offend you.  Kie and Sarah scurry over, welcoming you with hugs and jokes about how sorry they are they had to call you while John B and Pope still tend to the drunken blonde.
“It’s alright,” you assure them, “I don’t mind.” And you really don’t, not at all, not when he acts all the more helplessly in love with you.
The bonfire still burns on, red-hot embers breaking off into the midnight sky. Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon plays from a speaker nearby, and beer bottles litter the ground as you approach. The fire’s warmth wraps around you, a handle of Tito’s—only half full—entering your field of vision as you find JJ reclined back on the ground, an arm thrown over his eyes while his other hand taps along to the song. You crouch down next to him and hear him hum in tune.
John B stands behind you, feeling a little helpless. “He’s been talking about you nonstop since he got, like, three shots deep.”
“And as much as we love you guys together,” Sarah adds, leaning into the boy’s side, “He doesn’t listen very well once he gets started.”
You shoot them a smile over your shoulder. “It’s okay, I get it. You guys can head in if you want, this might take a while.” The two lovebirds wave you goodnight as they walk back inside with Kie and Pope, and you turn your attention back to your exceptionally troublesome boy. “JJ? Time to go to bed.”
He grumbles without moving an inch. “I told you to fuck off, Sarah, I just wanna see my girl.”
Your heart flutters at the name—his girl. You’ve never heard him call you that. Does he seriously think you’re Sarah? “Your girl?”
“Yeah, you know the gorgeous one?”
“Might ring a bell.”
“Yeah, well, she’s the most…the most beautiful person in the history of…of forever, and she’s mine, so get outta here n’…go flirt with John B or somethin’.” He lazily waves you off, mumbling something you don’t quite hear.
A smile fights its way to the surface, and you gently place your hand on the smooth plane of his shoulder. “Oh, but I wanted to flirt with you instead. How’s that sound, hm?”
He quickly pushes your touch away. “It sounds like my girl’s gonna kill you any second now, so watch it, Blondie.” He slurs his words as he speaks, pulling giggles from your lips. You gently take his wrist in your hand to remove his arm from his eyes and press a kiss where your fingertips touch him. His eyes stay closed, and he juts his chin in the opposite direction in protest.
“Jay, baby, I’m not killing anyone anytime soon,” you coo, leaning over his chest and face while running a hand through his hair. 
He opens one eye, suspicious of your claims, but quickly realizes it’s you, and turns to look at you like he’ll never get the chance to do it again, his expression swallowed by a smile. “When did you get here, baby?”
“Oh, just now,” you answer, laughter lacing your words, “Kie called me over.” You press a kiss to his forehead before sitting back up, your hand quickly taken by his.
“You should’ve come sooner.” His other hand makes its way to your thigh, smoothing over your skin. “I was waiting for you, all by myself, and—” he abruptly sits up— “there’s something I have to tell you,” he whispers. He casts a glance to the Chateau. “It’s top secret.”
With him this close, you can smell the vodka on his breath. “Yeah? What is it?” You loop your arms around his neck and scratch at the nape of his neck, to which he instinctively responds by wrapping his arms around your waist and rubbing the palms of his hands along your back.
“This is top secret, classified information, princess, you can’t just get it for free. Everything comes with a price.” A sly little grin comes over him, tugging you a little closer.
Knowing JJ, you already know where this is headed. You decide to play along anyway: “Name it, then. I’m sure we can strike a deal somehow.”
He mulls over his words before saying, “Hear me out.”
“I’m listening.”
“You—” he points at your chest— “give me three—no, five kisses for the info up front.” When you raise your eyebrows in suspicion, he continues, “And every follow up question is worth another kiss.”
“This must be very important information.”
“Very.” His hands, still soaking in the feeling of you beneath them, start to play with the hem of your tank top, fingertips slipping beneath the fabric to feel skin. “Better pay up soon.”
You feign a look of shock and place a hand on his chest. “I didn’t even agree yet, don’t get too excited.” 
He pouts with furrowed brows, convinced his offer would be impossible to resist. “Why? Baby, come on,” he urges, holding you tighter, “This is the part where you kiss me.” His eyelids droop with drunkenness and fatigue as he presses his lips to your neck, but you quickly take his jaw in your hand and pull him away. 
“Ah ah ah,” you tease. “You come to bed first, then I’ll give you kisses for your secrets.”
“But I don’t wanna go to bed.” His hands work their way from your waist down to your hips again, soon grazing your thighs the way he knows erupts butterflies in your stomach. “I wanna stay here with you…have you boss me around. You’re very sexy when you do it.” He smirks while looking up at you, and you know for a fact he’s just trying to push your buttons.
You roll your eyes and push his face away as you start to stand up. “You’re a pain in the ass, I hope you know that.” As bitter as you try to sound, you’ll always have a soft spot for him the way he does for you, especially when your bitterness is met with that beautiful smile of his. You hold out both hands, towering over him and urging him to stand. “C’mon, Jay.”
He leans his weight onto his hands, stubborn as always. “Will you stay the night?”
“Not if you keep this up, I won’t.” You lend him a condescending smile. 
“But Baby,” he groans, finally complying now that the stakes have been raised. “I haven’t seen you all day, and I miss you.” He starts to shuffle where he sits, taking hold of your hands as you pull him up, dizziness causing him to stumble into your arms. “Can’t a boy just get some love from his girl?” 
There he goes again—his girl. 
You loop his arm over your shoulder and wrap yours around his waist as you lead him into the Chateau, surrounded by his warmth and the smell that’s so distinctly him: a bit of beachiness, mandarin and musky from his body wash, a hint of marijuana.
“You’re very kind,” he rambles on, “for coming here so late. I missed you.”
“I know, baby. You told me.”
He makes his way up the steps with you, following as you open the door. “Well, I’m making sure you’re sure.”
“I’m sure, love.” You smile to yourself, a little caught off guard with how open he’s become.
“I still have to tell you that top secret information,” he whispers, leaning down to your ear-level. His body wraps around you as you stand in front of him to open the door to his bedroom, his arms start to wrap around your waist again. “And you still owe me kisses for it.”
You usher him into his room, shutting the door behind you. “C’mon, let’s get into bed. That was the rule.”
He does as you wish without complaint for once, though when he does sit at the edge of his bed, he also pulls you to stand in between his legs. “I’m in bed now.”
“I can see that,” you giggle, hands massaging his neck and shoulders.
“Does this mean you’ll give me a kiss now?”
“Not yet.” You tug at the fabric of his shirt. “Take this off, please?” You don’t think much when you say it, but once the words slip out and you see JJ’s brows raise as a cocky smirk crosses his face, you realize you need to cover your tracks.
He bites his tongue to oblige, nabbing the back of his tee before pulling it over his head. Revealed to you are his broad shoulders, his chest, those toned arms that are, admittedly, to die for, though you’d never tell him that directly. 
“You’re trying to undress me, baby?” he asks, too quick for you to correct yourself. His hands take purchase of your hips before taking up your thighs, his hands molding to your curves and getting treacherously close to your inner thighs.
Your face goes hot—why is he so good at this?—but you keep a straight face and grab his face, one hand cupping his jaw while the other supports the back of his head. “Do you want your kiss or not?” 
“Yes ma’am,” he responds, almost immediately. His eyes glaze over, entranced by everything you are. A drunk smile is sent your way, and he can’t really tell whether the tingling all over his body is just from the vodka, or if it’s your hands on his body, your snippy tone that he knows is full of love. He’s sure that no matter how flustered he can make you, it’ll never compare to how you make him feel with even the slightest of touches.
Your grip goes soft, and you rake your hand through his hair, his eyes falling shut and his head gone slack into your hands. “You’re beyond wasted, aren't you?”
He laughs heartily now, eyes still shut as he nods his head. “I can’t keep my eyes open any longer, princess.” Giggles line his words and his face scrunches in a smile, dimple on display.
“How much did you drink?”
“A few beers.”
“And?” You tug lightly on his hair.
“Mm, some vodka, maybe. A few shots.” His hands drag from the backs of your thighs, to your hips, to your waist.
“JJ.” You stare down at his clearly vodka-dazed face. “How many is a few?”
He hums to himself, as deep in thought one can be when wasted. “Maybe seven…or nine…don’t remember,” he mumbles.
You sigh to yourself, not surprised by his recklessness but still not all too happy with it. 
But before you can formulate a single thought, a single articulated response, he starts to pout—eyes still closed of course, because your boy is nothing if not a truth-teller. “You sound mad.” Even when wasted he knows you so well.
“I’m not,” you fib a little, for his own sake. You kiss his forehead, then his cheek before letting go of him entirely to pull back the covers for him. “Come on, time to sleep, yeah?” You give a soft tug on his hand as his body goes pliant.
He slowly but surely crawls properly into bed, giving you a show of his back muscles flexing and relaxing before falling face-first into his pillow with a hmph. You lay down next to him as he lifts his arm with all his might, slowly turning onto his side to make space for you. Legs intertwine without words, the warmth of his body blankets your senses, his weight grounds you.
“You need to hurry, princess. I need to…need to give you the information.” The words are half-muffled by his pillow, and his eyes are still shut. 
“Oh. We’re still doing that?” You’re surprised he even remembers the information at this point—whatever it might be. 
He squeezes you tighter into his body, pulling a smile from you as he groans. “Yes, we’re still doing that…it’s important. You need three more…”
“Okay, okay,” you soothe, and you press a kiss to his shoulder. “Does that count?”
“Mhm, two more.” A stupid, drunk, terribly charming grin crosses his face, and it feels like you’re falling for him all over again, teetering at the edge of a cliff. His arm, still heavy on your waist, shifts a little, and his fingers dance along your back and light fires where they touch.
You curl your hand, gently, along the crook of his neck and kiss his jaw. “And that counts as well?”
With the way you’re whispering your words into his neck, JJ swears he could die happily. “Mm, sure does.”
For the fifth and final kiss, the corner of his mouth. It curls into your kiss like he knew it was coming, and you give him one more just for good measure—and, maybe, because seeing him smile is worth his weight in gold. You brush your hand through his hair before hugging him a little tighter towards your chest, all too aware now that you won’t be getting any information out of him the rest of the night. This minor inconvenience, however, doesn’t seem to compare to having him in your arms, his breath against your neck, his arm wrapped around you to tell you he’s there, and he’s there to stay, and he wants to be there more than anywhere else.
You think that you could play this game a million times over. The part where you kiss him—that is, when his lovely, sweet little smile peeks through that rough shell—will never get old enough to retire.
(But for tonight, you can live without more of his drunken teasing. Just for tonight.)
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