"Down in the Dunkities" (RatMeat)
A/N: Second fic! I'm having trouble trying to write a prequel to Something Sweeter, so in the meantime, have this. Again, the characters may be out of character.
Also, quick note - please don't criticize me if my stories make no sense. My intention is to entertain, not to be logical.
Summary: Dexter's feeling down on life, and of course Bob won't have any of that.
Trigger warnings: Angst (maybe?)
Credit goes to @eunchancorner and their anonymous askers for the idea!
(fic below the cut)
Dexter had been staring at their hands for the last ten minutes, almost entranced by their own inner monologue. The aftereffect of their needs wasn’t nearly as intense as the actual anticipation itself, but it may have been worse - because now that they were in a relatively stable state of mind, they had all the time in the world to reflect on the horrible things they had done. God, they hated this feeling…
A low voice behind them snapped them out of their own thoughts. “Dex?”
Even if the person’s drawl wasn’t a dead giveaway, the pet name definitely was. With a heavy sigh, Dexter glanced over their shoulder to see Bob hovering over them. The large man was leaning on the couch, glancing down at his partner with clear concern. There was almost nothing that unsettled Dexter more than seeing Bob Velseb without a smile.
“Hey,” Dexter muttered, glancing away. The last thing they needed was to make Bob worry about them.
“Are ya havin’ those moods again?”
For a moment, Dexter considered lying. But that would be stupid - they were a terrible liar, and even if they were good at it, Bob seemed to have some kind of built-in lie detector. And even if they didn’t outright say what was wrong, Bob would fuss over them all day until they finally cracked from his kindness.
“Sort of,” they mumbled in defeat. There really was no point. They were damned if they did, damned if they didn’t. All they could really do was hope Bob wouldn’t be too up in arms about it, and not ask a lot of questions.
But of course, that was wishful thinking. “You look like ya haven’t slept. Is it that bad?”
Dexter sighed. They’d tried to explain the nature of their needs to Bob before, but the big guy never seemed to truly understand. But even so, he made up for it with his actions. Dexter used to say Bob had a big appetite and a bigger heart, and it really showed.
Next thing Dexter knew, Bob was seated next to them, with an arm around their waist. Bob wasn’t even that much bigger than Dexter, but he was definitely stronger by a long shot. Dexter soon found themself with their head on the larger man’s shoulder, and felt so tempted to fall asleep right there.
“There, there. You know I’m here for ya.”
While Dexter did feel better than they had before, they still felt awful. And clearly Bob could tell, too, because now he was pulling his flustered partner even closer. He shifted position, resting his chin on top of Dexter’s head. “Dex… you know this ain’t gonna fly. You know I’m gonna hafta’ do somethin’ about this.”
“Like what?” they mumbled bitterly.
“C’mon… don’tcha remember what happens to grumpy lil’ beans like you?”
Dexter tried to think. What did Bob do if they were down in the dunkities? Usually he’d spoil them, make their favorite food and whatnot. But for particularly bad days, Bob had this very… different way of handling things…
Wait.
Oh no.
He couldn’t possibly be thinking…?!
Dexter took a second to look upward, and catching a glimpse of Bob’s smirk confirmed their suspicions. “H-hey, listen… you don’t have to do this…”
“Oh, but I kinda do.”
“Y-you’re actually gonna-?!”
“Ya know the drill. Grumpy folks get the claws.”
Oh god. Not the claws. Anything but the claws!
Dexter didn’t even have a chance to retort before their larger partner viciously dug his claws into their ribs, eliciting a high pitched shriek. Then the shriek dissolved into giggles, often interrupted by loud snorting. One by one the claws unclenched, and each found their way to one particular spot on Dexter’s ribs.
“I know I’m doin’ this to cheer ya up,” Bob noted, “but I’d be lyin’ if I said I didn’t love that laugh of yours.”
Dexter buried their face into Bob’s sweater, not wanting him to see them blush from the flattery. But they knew it was probably too late - nothing escaped Bob Velseb, whether they were prey or details.
The claws were going to town, skittering and scribbling all over the flustered exterminator’s ribcage. It had only been a few minutes and they were already going insane. “NOOOO *snort* HAHAHAAH! NOHOT *snort* THE CLAWHAWHAWHAWS!!”
“Yes, the claws. Don’t tell me ya can’t handle the claws?~” He raised his other hand from Dexter’s back and playfully wiggled the digits over their head. “Well, the left claws are a bit lonely, so they got a new best friend - the right claws! And they’re just dyin’ to meetcha…”
Dexter dared to look up, and immediately hid again once they realized their mistake. One set of claws was bad enough, and only serious situations called for both pairs.
“…so make sure ya give them a warm welcome, hey?”
And both pairs of claws made contact with Dexter’s sides, wiggling and scribbling wherever they could reach - which was almost all of the poor exterminator’s torso, given how long the claws were. All Dexter could do was laugh and squeal their heart out, and they wouldn’t have it any other way.
Eventually Dexter slapped their hand against Bob’s sleeve, which was their designated sign for when it was time to stop. Bob immediately released them, relocating his hands to their back and allowing them to rest. Poor Dexter was practically breathless by this point, and very tired, but also quite euphoric. They’d never admit it aloud, but this was exactly what they’d needed.
“Ya feel better now?” they heard Bob say to them, very quietly and gently. They couldn’t respond verbally, but instead nodded, and Bob gently squeezed their back in return. “I could’ve wrecked ya for so much longer. Maybe some other time, when you’re feelin’ up to it.”
Dexter thought that sounded wonderful. They laid their head on Bob’s chest before starting to drift off, cradled by him and finally able to relax.
“Thank you…”
-END-
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