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iamknicole · 2 months

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4Ever

SVU Fic

Diedra and Serafina walked Sunny into the room with the bridal party, each holding one of her hands. They had taken her for a walk around the venue after they dressed her to keep her from boredom. Sunny had surprised both of her parents by taking her first steps the week prior so instead of riding in a wagon she would be walking down the aisle alongside Sasha as a flower girl. Monica was finishing Peach's hair while Kat and Bella helped Mia and Kaci with their dresses.

"Mama!" Sunny yelled going over to her. "Up!"

Peach laughed, carefully picking her daughter up. She kissed her face. "Look at my Sunshine. You look so pretty."

Sunny smiled wide showing off her new teeth and touched her hair.

"Yeah, Auntie Monica did your hair? It's pretty too." Peach glanced over at her mother and mother in law. "I know you two are not crying already."

Diedra waved her off. "Our babies are getting married, we earned the right to cry. I just can't believe this day has finally come."

"And such a beautiful bride she is," Serafina gushed wiping her eyes, "All of you ladies look beautiful. My son is so lucky to have you, Peach."

Peach smiled looking down at her daughter. "Your grandma and Nana are tryna make me cry. Tell them no no."

Sunny giggled looking to the older women. "No no no!"

On the other side of the venue, the men were in their own room getting ready for the wedding. Carisi sat off to the side his shirt unbuttoned at the top and tie hanging around his neck watching the men interact and get ready. Quincy and Nick noticed, going to sit with him.

"Big day is finally here. You get to marry my poison in the ass," Quincy joked making him chuckle. "So now she's your pain in the ass. Forever. No refund."

"I don't think she'd let me return her anyway." Carisi laughed.

"You're right to think that," Nick added. "You look like you're thinking hard. You okay?"

"Yeah yeah," he said quickly, rubbing a hand over his hair, "Just thinking about how far we've come. Feels like a dream."

"I can assure you it's not a dream. You and Peach are getting married in," Nick paused to look at his watch, "30 minutes. Get that tie tied and your vest and jacket on."

Nick and Quincy left him to finish getting ready. As he was buttoning his cuffs, he realized he didn't have his cuff links. He dug into his pockets to find nothing, checked his suit jacket to find nothing as well then went to his bag starting to worry. While he didn't need cuff links, he wanted to wear them. They were the ones Peach had gotten him the first birthday they spent together and he always wore them for special occasions. He hoped he just left them at home and hasn't lost them.

"Looking for something, son?" Carisi Sr. asked with an amused smile.

Carisi glanced at his father and father in law momentarily then went back to looking in his bag.

"Yeah, my cuff links. Could've sworn I packed them last night."

Nate chuckled. "They're not in there. Don't bother looking."

"They've gotta be, I know I packed them." He assured them softly still looking.

Nate tapped his shoulder then spun him around. He held out a velour box to Carisi, urging him to take it which he did slowly.

"What's this?" Carisi asked starting at the box

Carisi Sr. Laughed. "Just open it. You act like something is gonna jump out and kill you."

Laughing to himself, Carisi opened the small box sic smiled seeing cuff links. One side had their initials and the other their wedding date engraved.

"Wow. Thank you guys. I still need to find the others but I love these."

Again the men laughed.

"Those are not from us," Nate said. "Babygirl took those other ones out of your bag last night and gave me those to give to you. Stop worrying."

Carisi smiled wide, looking back down at the cuff links. "Oh thank God. Thought I lost them."

The groomsmen and bridesmaids had all joined Carisi and the priest at the altar while their guests looked on. Noah came down the aisle carrying a black velvet pillow with their rings snuggly nestled on it. Olivia and Elliot smiled widely at him. Eli gave a thumbs up to him and Carisi high fived him as he made it to the altar. Sasha and Sunshine came next, Sasha would give the toddler flowers to throw them throw her own doing this all the way down the aisle. When they got near the altar Sunshine finally noticed Carisi, she squealed and ran to him making everyone laugh.

"Dada!" She giggled.

He kissed her cheek and gave her fruit snacks from his pocket. "Good job, Sunny. Good job."

Carisi gave his babygirl to his mother then went back to his spot, making silly faces at her. Once everyone was calm again, Zara came running out.

"Everybody get up!" She yelled standing at the end of the aisle. "The bride is coming! The bride is coming!"

She continued to yell it out as she skipped down the isle. Nick winked at her from his spot with the groomsmen. The large double doors opened revealing Peach and Nate just as music started to play.

Behind her veil tears slowly roll down her face as she walks arm and arm with Nate. Her eyes remain in Carisi, his on her. He mouths that he loves her wiping his own fallen tears. Getting to the altar, Nate relinquished her to Carisi when asked who gives this woman to this man. Carisi waited until she was standing across from him to lift her veil, he took in a big breath coming face to face with the love of his life as did she.

"Mama!"

Sunshine's squealed broke the couples stare and made them laugh. Peach turned to quickly blow a kiss at her daughter then gave her bouquet to Monica.

The ceremony had been a blur for the couple as they were lost in each other's eyes until it was time for their own vows. They both agreed to keep them short for the sake of their daughter having to sit too long. The two of them held hands.

"When I walked into the precinct that night, I had no idea that the new detective I met would be my wife and the mother of my child one day. You brought everything I needed and everything I thought I would never have into my life." Carisi spoke, staring into her eyes letting his tears fall. "BiBi, you mean the everything to me and I plan on spending our life giving you the world. I love you."

"You are my other half that I had been missing my whole life. My better half, really. You never let me win an argument," she paused to chuckle, "But I would rather lose arguments to you than not have you at all. Sonny, you are my dream come true. I could get forever with you and it still would not be enough. I love you more."

The couple went through the traditional vows as well and exchanged rings.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I now present to you Mr. and Mrs. Dominick Carisi Jr." The priest announced as the couple kissed.

Kat and Nick placed the broom in front of them. Carisi linked arms with Peach's and she used her free hand to gather her dress. They counted to three and jumped over the broom together. Their family and guests cheering in response as they walked down the aisle.

#svu fic #law and order svu fic #sonny carisi #dominick carisi #carisi & peach #Spotify

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sanversandfriends · 1 year

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This writer needs no introduction. She's been keeping eyeballs glued to AO3 since the Halcyon days when the show was still good and Alex was still Alex. Behold the origin story of the Sanvers fandom's very own @performativezippers!

Tell us a little about yourself. How did you get started writing fic? Have you written for other fandoms? What are your favorite tropes? I've talked about this before, but I found fic because of research I was doing in grad school. I was studying a fan advocacy group about queer representation on Glee (bleak times!) but the group folded before I had everything I needed. I had to produce a publishable paper by the end of the semester, and fanfic was the closest pivot I could make to use the research I'd already done. So I started studying Glee fanfic, and went down a rabbit hole of canon vs noncanon representation in fanfic and what that means for queer imaginations, basically (one of my papers was called "Faberry is Love, Pass it On," and another was "Write Your Own God Damned Stories," good fucking times). And then later I was like...you know what, there's a formula to successful fanfics, and now that I know it, could I do it? What if I wrote something as a test? And oops that was in like 2013!

I originally wrote for Rizzoli and Isles, then for Sanvers, now also for Kacy (ncis hawaii).

In terms of tropes, I'm a sucker for a good friends-to-lovers slow burn arc. That's *chef's kiss* when it's done just right. What were your inspirations for this particular story? What was it about this/these ships that grabbed you?

Not to remind people of The Wars, but if you don't mind remembering, back when Sanvers was broken up (I'M SORRY), they said it was because Alex wanted a kid. Now, I thought that was stupid, because lord knows I fucking love Alexandra Danvers with all my heart but she was definitely not a parent of the year candidate in any way. I don't remember how it happened, but to get through our pain, some of us were joking about like, "just give her a dog and dress it up like a baby" and then I was thinking, "hmm, Alex would probably want like, a big ass predator for a child" and then somehow, probably in a fever dream, it became Make Alex's Child a Velociraptor. So it's actually a direct response to canon, which is weird because it's about a dinosaur and also Kara isn't in it, but there you have it.

This ship (Sanvers) grabbed me in a chokehold from day one. I had started watching Supergirl in season one because I like superhero stuff and I like ladies, and I crushed on Alex hard from the beginning. And then Maggie showed up for season two, and it was...fucking magic. I didn't know what was going to happen, I wasn't on the spoiler internet yet, so I watched it with baited breath. So often when you see two women characters with that kind of chemistry, you're screaming at the TV "YOU GUYS, THAT'S GAY" but it never happens. And this time it did. I yelled, "Alex, that's gay," and Maggie said, "Damn Alex, that's pretty gay," and then Alex said, "Fuck, you guys, I'm gay" and then THEY KISSED. I couldn't believe it.

And Alex's coming out speech was the most me-like thing I had ever seen on television, hands down. Has the time spent away from your story changed your outlook or approach to any of the storylines or themes? Have you had any new inspirations or breakthroughs/revelations in the meantime?

I'm a much better writer than I was when I started this fic. I've learned so much, from line-level work to how to write a plot and everything between. I still really love the worldbuilding I did originally, and the character of Gertrude the Dinosaur, and most of the large-scale choices I made for the ship and the tension. What's interesting about this fic is that it's the only thing I ever outlined, and it's the only thing I never finished. Not a coincidence! If I know what's happening, I get both bored and confined, and it doesn't work for me. The trick was to wait so long that I straight up forgot what was in the outline. I literally haven't reopened that word document, and I won't until my draft is finished. Maybe I'll find some gems in there that I want to work in, but I learned my lesson! No outlines! No thinking too far ahead!! That way lies madness (and unfinished fics). Any advice for new or aspiring fic writers?

Write what you want to read. Honestly, that's it. When I'm sad, I read my own stuff. When I want to be delighted, I read my own stuff. It's really easy to get hung up on what other people say or want to see, how many comments or kudos you get (I'm very guilty of this!) but ultimately, write something that, when you want comfort, you can read and go, "oh yeah, that's the good shit right there." Maybe that's fluff, maybe smut, maybe 100k of bloody torture--doesn't matter. Write what you want to read.

(But please, for the love of lesbian jesus, my actual advice is to put the dialogue tag on the same line as the dialogue. Please!) If you were going to promote this fic with a single line, what would it be?

Alex's child doesn't like Maggie, which is difficult because Alex is in love with Maggie and also the child is a velociraptor. If you’ve already posted some of your work, please provide a link.

You can find the fic here, but I haven't posted the edited versions of the existing chapters yet, so I honestly recommend not diving in until I've posted the first of the new chapters (chapter 10): https://archiveofourown.org/works/13799136/chapters/31724760

"Thanks, Zipps!"

she said.

#Supergirl #Sanvers #Finish the Fic #Velociraptor chow

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ao3feed-ncishawaii · 1 month

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warm love softly

by echoes_of_realities If pushed to pick a love language that she embodies, Lucy truly doesn’t think she could choose just one. She’s always had so much love to give, but not always somewhere to put it. And then she met Kate Whistler, who soaks up every piece of affection directed at her like a flower starving for sunlight, and suddenly Lucy has a place for all of her love. Or, five times Lucy takes care of Kate and one time she lets herself be taken care of. Words: 4130, Chapters: 1/6, Language: English Fandoms: NCIS: Hawai'i Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: F/F Characters: Lucy Tara, Kate Whistler Relationships: Lucy Tara/Kate Whistler Additional Tags: Fluff, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Fluff, set in some ambiguous time post Lucy’s return from agent afloat, 5+1 Fic, I don’t know how I never realized how perfectly love languages fit into a 5+1 format earlier, but we’re here now so that’s all that matters lol, Injured Kate, nothing serious though like completely on par with the show, very Soft Kacy because I am nothing if not predictable, will potentially add more tags as they come up but will probably forget to lol via https://ift.tt/Ft2yCxE

#ncis hawaii

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tigertofu · 10 months

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ooh!! I love Kacie! For the OC ask thingy would you wanna do these?

✨- How did you come up with the OC’s name?

🍀 - What originally inspired the OC?

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC?

YES I WOULD LOVE TO TY SM FOR ASKING..... im gonna ramble now :))

✨: sooo i actually didnt come up with her name lol. i was actually 🤏this close to naming her Danny/Dani when i first created her but then i showed my partner a sketch of her and asked them what name would suit her. they said "she looks like a Casey" and i was like "!!! u know what she totally does" and went with that but changed it to a spelling that i liked more

🍀: when i first got into gtav and started looking up fics on ao3 (forever ago.... b4 i even had this account) i discovered the bountiful wealth of trevor/oc fics.... i ended up devouring all the ones that interested me and was like "ugh now what am i gonna stare at until 3 in the morning??? i need more" and eventually figured "wait....... I could MAKE more 🫨" so that was the main inspiration for making her in the first place. i'll admit that in her Fetal Stage Kacie was WAY more of a self insert than she ended up being..... my very first draft of my first fic (which is COMPLETELY different from what i ended up posting) was literally just Me In GTA-World. i quickly found out that was boring af tho cuz im not exactly an exciting person so i stopped making my oc only do things i would do and act the way i would act and started over. remnants of that Self-Insert Kacie still exist in the Current Kacie tho.... mainly just in her being a bisexual filipino-american who has an anxiety disorder and a fondness for middle-aged white men

🧠: not to like suck my own dick or anything but,, def her characterization. making her feel real and flawed has always been my MO. like from the get-go i wanted this bitch to have Layers and Complicated Psychology and a Character Arc etc etc. have i succeeded?? objectively, idk ! but i sure do feel rlly content with what i've done so far

#ty againnn💕💕#ask #kacie ocampo

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beatbot8 · 2 years

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Hi. I love your Kacy fic 'can't feel my face' with ticklish Kate. So funny. Would the newest episode inspire you to write a ticklish Lucy fic ?

The new episode has inspired all sorts of ideas! ❤️.

I will definitely think about this one though. Maybe Kate shows up at work with a bruised face and the team asks about it, she refuses to answer, Lucy blurts out that she’s ticklish behind her knee, and everyone realizes all at once how Kate managed to get a bruise on her face while discovering that tickle spot?

And, as usual in my universe of NCIS Hawaii fics, Jane Tennant will look sorry she ever allowed herself to get involved in her teams’ shenanigans.

#ncis hawaii #kacy #kate whistler #lucy tara #kate x lucy

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100hearteyes · 2 years

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Did you see the extended promo? It really was just a snippet, but it seved its purpose... Kate Whistler's neck + the Netflix show First Kill has me fantasizing about a Kacy vampire fic lol. Imagine the enemies to lovers, Whistler the vampire hunter avenging her brother and vampire Lucy, who's from a very powerful family. Generally I am lukewarm about vampires (but loved Buffy). Though, all I really want is (not so) sneaky vampire Lucy stepping on a stool to sink her teeth into Kate 😂

Look at those two little dots 👀 look at 'em.

Imagine Lucy as the heiress of a powerful family of vampires with a rebellious streak. She's torn about her loyalty; feels the need to please her family, because she feels some sort of duty to them, but is starting to crumble under the crushing weight of expectation and the growing awareness of their not-so-righteous activities.

Enter human vampire hunter Kate Whistler, whose brother Noah was killed. She's convinced it was Lucy's family who did it, therefore she starts hunting them down. Something happens that leads to an initial confrontation in the woods, somewhere remote, and Kate somehow manages to render Lucy powerless for a few days – her way of killing vampires. They fight, Lucy wins anyway, and right as she's about to kill Kate-- she hesitates and decides to let Kate live after all, because Lucy is not ruthless like her family, as Kate will later start to realize.

That's the beginning of a tacit truce between them. Lucy is stripped of her powers, whereas Kate is injured, so they can't really escape each other as they trek through the woods, lost and looking for a way out, and bicker the whole way.

It takes them days.

Lucy doesn't want to believe her family would have killed Noah, but the evidence is all there. And how can she not believe this weird human who seems intent on risking her own life to bring down the one of the most powerful families in the world and avenge her brother? And whose eyes shine when she talks about her brother, whose lips twitch when she's trying not to smile or cry, whose jaw clenches when she's frustrated, whose hands speak the truths her voice can't put words to? How can Lucy not give Kate at least the benefit of the doubt?

And maybe somewhere along the way something happens that makes Lucy feel extra week and she has to step onto a log or something to sink her teeth into Kate's neck and drink her (voluntarily offered) blood 😂 maybe it's actually Kate who insists she do it 👀

At some point Lucy finally gets her powers back and decides to take them both home. Once there, she tells Kate something like, "I can't take it at face value; they're my family. But I can promise to look into it". And that means so much for Kate - even more than if Lucy had accepted it right out of the gate - because Lucy is willing to shake the very foundations of her life and beliefs just to see if something pops up. Lucy is willing to question things - things she never dared question before - for her.

And she finds that maybe she's starting to feel something for someone who represents everything she hates. She's starting to feel something - sympathy, friendship, whatever – for a vampire, the monsters she loathes and hunts and has sworn to kill the very last one of.

Anyway, Lucy eventually confirms Kate's suspicions and decides to help her take down her family, which is... It's big. It's the first - and maybe last - time she goes against her family.

And the rest is up to your imaginations 😌

#kacy #ask #anon #spoilers #kacy headcanons #kate x lucy #kacy spoilers #ncis hawaii spoilers #ncis hawaii #whistara

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i-like-turkey · 2 years

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NCIS Hawai’i 1x20 Thoughts under cut

“Feelings are like waves. You can’t stop them from coming, but you can choose which ones to surf.”

I absolutely love the choice to have Lucy say this to Kate because she’s completely missing the point. Her feelings for Kate are THE big massive wave that she should want to ride. It’s going to be scary, she might almost get pulled under at some points, but if she keeps her balance it will be the most exhilarating ride of her life.

The feelings she’s choosing to ride right now: anger at Kate and avoidance with Skylar, those are shit waves. The ones where she gets swept under and tossed around for a while until her bruised and beaten body makes it to shore.

The Skylar Dates

I’m standing firm on my assessment that the first date was awkward and uncomfortable.

I hate that Lucy chose to follow through with a second date because she clearly does not want to be there. It’s a dating ethics thing. If you’re hung up on someone else, you need to be careful about how you approach dating again because you can very easily hurt someone else in an attempt to make yourself feel better. If Lucy was smiling the entire way up that elevator. Fine. Cool. But she had to psych herself up and it almost looked like she was about to bail. I don’t like that. She’s probably better off having a one night stand. But her current choice involves another person who I’m not sure knows the history and that makes me queasy. (I have many stories about being in Skylar’s position 😂)

The Beach Scene

Perfection. I want to see every take of it. I don’t know how Tori kept a straight face.

The Future of Kacy

The reaction I’ve seen on this is split. Twitter is having a meltdown. Folks here seem to think we’re headed in a positive direction. I’m unsure. Lucy is so angry and refuses to let Kate talk. What is going to change over the course of two episodes to make her let go of some of that anger? Is the next episode where they face the possibility of losing each other? And that makes Lucy more amenable to Kate’s grand gesture?

If I had to guess right now, I’m saying we end with a cliffhanger. Either Kate says her thing and we fade to black or Kate says her thing, Lucy starts to answer, and then the party is interrupted by some dangerous thing and all hell breaks loose and then we fade to black.

If that doesn’t happen, I’m more inclined to think Skylar will stick around and we get the scenario that I’m dreading: a season 2 where Lucy is with someone who gets screen time while Kate pines.

I’m putting a Kacy reunion as the least likely scenario and I hope to god I’m wrong. Caveat here: I’m always pessimistic because I’m used to getting fucked over by my shows.

Other stuff

I have some fic thoughts after this. Ones that you will probably hate me for. But I’m also not feeling motivated to write. That episode hurt. In a good way. I absolutely loved every second. My quibble with the movie date is not with how they wrote it; rather it’s with the character of Lucy being a dumbass and doing something I don’t like.

#kate x lucy #kacy #ncis hawai'i #Lucy tara #kate whistler

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hatchetation · 2 years

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Thanks for the space you give people to talk about Kacy!! I’m pretty sure the fandom will just get bigger and bigger and that’s awesome, they deserve the recognition!!

I saw a post talking about Whistler with kids or Lucy with kids and now I really want a fic about that, so please, talented people out there, make it happens!!!!

It could be, like, their children or just a family member staying for a weekend, it would be very cute and different from the fic options we have nowadays!

What kind of moms do you think they would be? IMO Kate would be the strict one, but funny and Lucy would be all protective and always willing to play with them, even making up games to keep them entertained lol

Aww thanks for saying that! :) The fandom is already so much bigger than when the show started so...that's pretty cool!

For the fic writers--#kacy with kids!! I would 100% enjoy it too. Lucy has now mentioned knowing Jesse's kids a couple of times and she def knows Tennant's kids as well, so I'd love to see her and Kate babysitting them. And like, I'm imagining that Kate would love seeing Lucy discussing Pokemon in depth with Jake and that Lucy would be utterly charmed by Kate talking with the kids. Like maybe Kate would be a lil awk at first but she'd warm up and by the end the kids would LOVE her...

As for what kind of moms they'd be, I feel like Kate would secretly be a HUGE softy and that Lucy might actually be the one who has to hold the line on consequences and things like that...I'd be interested to know what others think?

#this is so cute to imagine #kacy #lucy tara #kate whistler #lucy x kate #ncis hawaii #whistara

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acrazylesbianscientist · 2 years

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Brain over Brawn

This is one of the Kacy fics I'm working on and thought I would share already the first chapter for this one. Please let me know what you think. All feedback is welcome. Still getting (back) into writing.

Kate is trying and reaching out. Lucy has fears but has to meet her halfway. It’s video games that get them moving forward.

Songs that go with this chapter (fit the mood/listened to while writing this chapter):

Make it right – The George Twins

Between Twilight – Lindsey Stirling

Shutting her laptop down Kate is glad this long week and even longer day is finally over. With the brief send to her bosses, she can finally enjoy her weekend, or how much there is still left of it as it’s already 4 PM. She knew she didn’t have to send the brief today, could have easily done it on Monday, but she didn’t have anything better to do anyway.

Normally she would spend her Saturdays with Lucy, but then they broke up, and her Saturdays were free again. So, naturally, she fell back into her old habit of working the day away instead of enjoying her weekend. Only, what was there to enjoy if your heart is broken. When you can’t spend time and relax with the one person that ever made you want to let work be. The only one that could break through your need to work and strive to perfection.

Warming up yesterday’s leftovers, Kate takes her dinner to her balcony. It’s her favorite part of her apartment. The view of the ocean, the ocean breeze she can feel if the wind is just right, and not least the amazing sunsets she gets to witness. Sunsets have always been calming to her, and often she finds herself enjoying the view after work with a glass of wine. Letting the stress of the day fall away with the sun as it goes under. When she started seeing Lucy, it became something they enjoyed together. A moment in time, where no words were spoken, just them and the fading sunlight.

Laughing to herself, she remembers the time Lucy came barging into her apartment with the food she had picked up. Tripping over her feet to get her shoes off, she actually landed sprawled out in her hallway like a starfish, in such a haste to get to the balcony. Afraid she was missing the sunset after not being able to enjoy it together for a week. She had laughed so hard she had bent over crying, before helping Lucy up and reassuring her it was still half an hour until sunset but that she loves the enthusiasm. Hopefully one day soon she can spend these moments of tranquility with Lucy again.

Her hope was for today to be that day. Things between her and Lucy have been getting better after she got a chance to explain the whole Cara incident. Yes, she technically didn’t break up with her, but they hadn’t even spoken in the three months before she left for Hawai’i. They had a big fight about how Kate was working too much and never had time for her or to hang out with her friends. And that she wasn’t sure whether she wanted to continue their relationship. To which she had replied that it didn’t seem to be bothering her that much as she was making out with another girl just yesterday. After that, no more words were spoken. She had only left Cara a text saying she was moving to Hawai’i for work and to say goodbye, which didn’t even get a reply, and didn’t hear anything until that morning when she just showed up. Saying that she wanted to try again. After explaining, she had apologized to Lucy for hurting her feelings and not telling her about Cara. She also apologized for not seeing how much the secrecy was affecting her. Lucy had said she could understand that Kate thought it was over, but she was still hurt. She needs to know she can trust Kate again and doesn’t want to go back to being secretive.

Ever since that talk, Kate has been making an effort to show Lucy she can be trusted and she’s done hiding. It had started with actually looking at Lucy when she was liaising with the NCIS team and touching her elbow in comfort or goodbye when appropriate. Hoping that it would show to Lucy she is serious about winning her trust back and willing to be open about them. It slowly evolved in sharing little bits about herself when she went with the team for drinks. Nothing she shared was new for Lucy, but sharing it with the rest was a big step for her. Though it still makes her uncomfortable at times, it is worth it to show Lucy she’s trying to be more open. She had also tried to spend time with Lucy outside of work, but so far she got shot down every time. It worries her a little bit because she doesn’t know what more she can do if Lucy doesn’t want to spend time with her. However, she holds on to the fact that the efforts she has been making so far have resulted in Lucy going for lunch with her a few times now. Even it was always on base and the topics stayed mostly work-related. It’s progress and she vows to herself to keep trying.

When she asked Lucy yesterday to have dinner together today, she hoped that Lucy would finally say yes. Since this time, when Lucy was leaving to follow up on a lead after her debrief, she had squeezed her elbow in goodbye. So when she headed over later that day when the case was finished to pick up the necessary forms, she decided to give it another try. Her hope was quickly diminished, however, when Lucy resolutely said no. Her face must have fallen because Lucy was quick to explain she already had plans with Kai to grab a bite to eat before watching this new movie that was out. Even though she was appreciative of the explanation, It didn’t stop the hurt she felt at the rejection.

Finishing her dinner, Kate is suddenly hit by the thought of how proud Noah would be of her for making the effort. To get out of her so-called comfort zone. As soon as it hits her, the grief hits her as well and how much she misses him. By now she’s used to the strange way grief works. Things that she would expect to trigger her are at times no problem. While other completely irrelevant things have her at moments collapsing on the floor in tears. That she misses him so much right now is probably related to the stress of the week and the case she worked on with Tennant and the team about a missing brother.

Reliving some of her happy childhood moments with her brother, she’s unaware she has cleaned up and found her way to her bedroom. Hands reaching for the box with some of Noah’s belongings. A sudden urge to feel close to her brother takes hold of her. Pulling the box from the shelf her eyes land on her gaming console. Most people wouldn’t guess that Kate Whistler likes playing video games and would laugh at the very notion. But it is true. It was something her brother forced her to play with him as he was bored and ‘playing alone is only so much fun Kate, I need someone to beat’. When she realized she actually enjoyed it, she would start challenging her brother. In the end, it became a fixed Sunday afternoon ritual for them to play and compete to determine who the better player is. This often meant playing a plethora of different games multiple times as both would not accept defeat. Nowadays, she doesn’t play that often anymore. Only taking it out when she needs a break from work and reality or when frustration and stress get too much and running or swimming isn’t helping.

Opening the box, her hands caress the clothes Noah would wear while gaming. This is the only proper outfit to play video games in Kate. Everyone knows that. Get with the program. Taking the clothes out she knows exactly how she can feel close to her brother.

-----------

Across town Lucy is sitting in a bar with Kai, grabbing a bite to eat before the movie while talking about. Well, Lucy is not really sure what they are talking about. She’s not paying much attention. Her mind had drifted off to Kate when Kai had brought up the case they just finished. Wondering whether the case had maybe hit a bit too close to home for her. She had wanted to ask but didn’t know how to bring it up. From there, her thoughts had spiraled until she lost all focus.

“How are things with you and Whistler?”

That had her immediately snapping back to attention. Wondering how they came to this particular topic and if Kai was reading her mind. Although he probably just read her face. She has been told to be an open book and has to agree with that. She was never good at hiding what she feels and to her, that is a good thing. Emotions and feelings aren’t meant to be hidden. They are there to be felt and there is nothing wrong with showing how you feel.

“It’s okay. Why?” And that right there was her problem. It was okay, but she wanted more than okay. Wants more than this kind of friendship she has right now. It’s why she had lost all focus in the first place. When she realized she would much rather be with Kate right now. Not just to see if the case didn’t bring up any painful memories but to just be with her. As her girlfriend. And if she’s completely honest with herself she has wanted that for a while now. The bitter irony of it all is not lost on her as she is the one that is preventing things from moving forward.

“I know it isn’t my place, but you were kind of harsh yesterday declining her invitation Lucy. And now you seem distracted. You know she’s trying, right? Everyone can see it” Kai says tactful. Giving her a look that tells her she can talk about it if she wants but is also happy to drop the subject.

Taking a deep breath, Lucy grabs on to Kai’s willingness to listen. It might do her some good to talk about what she’s feeling

‘’I know she’s trying. And I don’t know why I reacted so harshly, to be honest. I’ve already forgiven her for what’s she’s done and I’m ready to try again. But part of me is scared and I guess that part reacted yesterday”

“Scared of what?”

“That things haven’t really changed, and it goes back to how it was. Or that it will be different now, but I can’t be open with her. The same thing I accused her of” There she said it. It felt good to finally let out what has been bothering her for a while now.

“I won’t pretend to know how things were before, but I’m pretty certain things won’t go back to that again. First of all, I know you. And you won’t allow it” Kai says pointedly while pointing a fry at her for extra measure.

Lucy nodded at that as Kai had a point there. She will never go back to keeping things secret and made that very clear to Kate. That if they will ever try again it had to be out in the open for everyone to see. Especially her team who is basically her family.

“And second, Whistler is different now. I don’t mean just that she’s trying now. It seems she also changed personally, but I’m not sure. She’s hard to read and I don’t know her that well or that long” Kai says with a shrug.

“No, you’re right” Lucy finds herself agreeing now that she thinks about it. Yes, Kate has been trying, but she has also seen the subtle shift in Kate. How she seems more relaxed and comfortable with herself. How she would reach over to touch her elbow or back in goodbye. Not caring that the rest of the team can see it. And also less worried about who could see them when having lunch together and if people passed by not acting like it is a professional meeting.

“As for you being scared” Kai continues but is cut off when his phone starts to ring.

“Hey dad”

“…”

“I’m actually going to see that movie in an hour with Lucy”

“…”

“You don’t even like those types of movies”

“He can have my ticket” Lucy blurts out before they can start arguing. Receiving a surprised look from Kai.

“Your dad. He can have my ticket” Lucy says again answering Kai’s unspoken question.

“Let me call you back dad” Kai says before hanging up the phone.

“That’s not necessary Lucy. I know you were excited to see this movie as well”

“I know I don’t. But your dad is making an effort here. To go watch a movie that you like. If you want things to change and get better between you two, you have to meet him halfway. Besides, I can go see the movie another time” It’s true. She did want to see this movie, badly. But this was more important. She has seen how much Kai has been struggling to improve his relationship with his dad. Even if he’s not very vocal about it, it was pretty clear to her as she’s been in this position as well. Trying to repair the relationship with her parents after she enrolled in FLETC to become a federal agent. Lucky for her, she had siblings helping her out. It still is not the best, but they can manage civil phone conversations every once in a while as long as they don’t take too long. But it’s slowly getting better. Kai doesn’t have any siblings, so she sees it as her duty to help him.

“Yeah, you’re right” Kai says with a sigh. And is that surprise she hears as well?

“I know I am” Lucy says with a smug grin. Because of course she is. She’s the best at giving this type of advice. He should know that by now and not be so surprised.

“But you should also take your own advice”

Lucy is sure she looked as confused as she felt at that statement since Kai is quick to explain.

“You have to meet Whistler halfway as well if you want to try again. If you keep holding back you might never get past your fears”

Mulling it over, she concludes that Kai, well she, is right. She needs to meet Kate in the middle. If they want to move forward it has to come from both of them and right now Kate is the only one trying. True, it was up to her to make the first steps. But by now Lucy should have made an effort as well. If only to let Kate now she has started to trust her again.

“Okay. Next time I will say yes when asks to have dinner together if you go and pick up your dad to watch this movie together. Deal?”

“Deal”

With that Lucy gives Kai her ticket and moves to pay the bill. Stopping any complaints by saying family pays for each other and he can always get the next one. After a quick hug, Kai goes to get his dad and Lucy goes home. Or at least that was her intention until she sat in her car and drove away. She replayed the conversation she had with Kai. Feeling grateful for his willingness to listen and his advice. It also brought back the feeling that she had which caused her to lose focus and start the whole conversation in the first place. She still wants to see Kate, to just be with her. Suddenly it seems too long to wait for the next time Kate has gathered the courage again to reach out to her. Maybe, in this case, meeting her halfway means that she does the reaching out the next time she sees her. Parking her car Lucy sees that she subconsciously has driven to Kate’s apartment. She debates for only a second before getting out.

And maybe meeting halfway is showing up even after saying no.

#Kacy #Kate x Lucy #Kate Whistler #Lucy Tara #I thought I wait with posting until I got my AO3 account #But that is taking forever #Hope you guys enjoy

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englishstrawbie · 2 months

Text

NCIS Hawai'i 3x05

How can we be half way through the season already? ☹️

Firstly, whoever chose to put Lucy in that suit is owed a pay rise 👌🏻

I love that they gifted us a Lucy-centric episode and I love that they gave us a little more insight into Lucy's family. I feel like it must be leading somewhere, if not this season but perhaps next season. Lucy's parents showing up in Hawai'i? A road trip to Texas? At least, I hope so, because it left me wanting to know more about that family dynamic.

It felt intentional that Lucy said she has nothing to do with the family business - not her family. We heard her talking about the fact that her parents aren't going to give her a big family wedding because of her sexuality, but I've always got the impression that she has some sort of relationship with them, even if they're not close.

It's interesting to me that we've seen Lucy push Kate to be more open about her brother, when she herself is a closed book when it comes to talking about her family. She wants more than she can give herself.

Another thing I'm curious about is Lucy's brothers and the comment that her eldest brother is having personal problems, which is why Michael is taking over the family business. Ever since 2x20 and the way Lucy knew how to talk to Joe, I've wondered if she has someone in her family or past who struggles with their mental health and I wonder if that person is her eldest brother?

I needed way more worried!Kate in this episode. I love that all three guys text her (no call???) and I felt it when she snapped at them, but I feel like we saw more tension from her in 1x11 when Lucy's undercover mission went wrong than in this episode. Less Sam, more Kate please.

And oh, that Kacy scene at the end was so lovely.

"I waited as long as I could" "I didn't realise I missed you so much - or how strong you are" "It was only twelve hours" ... "It felt longer"

I love how much they love each other. 🥰

Also...

Give me Lucy and Kate curled up on the couch watching crappy television please.

Lucy's reaction to Camille was so good, I love her teasing relationship with Kai. Also, Ernie and Jesse watching the CCTV footage of them at the hotel. 😂

That said, I'm suspicious of Camille. I don't really have a good reason why, except wondering why she's there and why we've met her so quickly. (Especially because we still haven't met Heather!) Maybe I'm being irrational but I'm staying suspicious for now.

"I know everything, Kai" ... Jane Tennant is the boss.

If anyone reads any good post-3x05 fics (when AO3 is back up and running 🥹) then feel free to rec them in the comments or my inbox please!

#ncis hawaii #ncis hawai'i #lucy tara #kate whistler #my rambles

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anotherbeingsworld · 4 years

Text

Trouvaille

Pairing: Bryce Lahela x F!MC (Casey Valentine)

Summary: An added scene from Chapter 18 of OH:SY where the gang were spending their night at the rooftop. They were revelations made between Bryce and Casey after questioning their decision on their future, something as simple as.. home.

A/N: This is apparently a late birthday gift for @kelseaaa and @fantasyoverreality98 on their birthdays last week! I wanted to write a fic for both of you since we have been in love with Bryce and, I hope all of you enjoy it! Love you both ! Thank you for being amazing people here in this world <333 Happy belated birthday!!!!

A/N: I also, may not be writing much for the next weeks since exams are coming for me! But, I will be back sooon afterwards! Thank you so much for reading and understanding! I have plans and I can’t wait to share more ! Thank you @jaxsmutsuo for reading it for me and assuring me about it, go check out her first fic guys HERE ! <3

Tags: @bitchloveskcbaseball , @storyofmychoices @jaxsmutsuo , @mvalentine , @princess-geek , @lahellacute , @kacie-0156-deactivated20200905 , @this-person-is-busy , @annekebbphotography , @brycelahel @mrsbhandari , @dcbbw , @choicessa , @choices-confessions , @aylamwrites-deactivated20201016 , @fantasyoverreality98 , @baltersome , @ofpixelsandscribbles , @thundergom @starrystarrytrouble, @kelseaaa , @rookie-ramsey , @bratzlahela , @ohvamsey , @choicesficwriterscreations , @soft-for-drake , @lalizah , @drethanramslay , @arcticlumineer , @choicesstan1 , @aveeiro , @eleanorbloom

MY MASTERLIST

Trouvaille - Something lovely discovered by chance.

Her smile was visible as they sat at the rooftop, the final hurrah between them. Casey stares at the view above them, as her friends can be seen taking some momento’s with Elijah’s new camera that he found while a day of thrifting.

She felt a presence besides her, as Bryce stood on the railing with her. Somehow, their silhouettes overlooking the whole city of Boston. It felt like a farewell, their final farewell to the small part of her life that has become a home to her in the last 48 months being there.

‘I’m glad you suggested this.’ Her hands were in his, as they held onto each other. Their eyes gazes onto the view, as the lights from the city view shines brighter tonight, reflecting her gold attire that made their night brighter in a sense.

‘It felt right for a last hurrah, a last goodbye…’ Her eyes trailed at their friends, who is enjoying their drinks as Rafael was found to be laughing from a joke, along with Sienna from a small reference of a tv-show from Elijah and Phoebe’s recommendation.

‘Hey, tomorrow is still here… It’s never goodbye.’ His voice echoed onto the night sky, a small comfort which unfortunately didn’t gave her the level of comfort that was needed. She smiled regardless, not wanting to ruin their night.

‘I know… have you thought of your next move after… Edenbrook?’ Casey felt her voice cut, as somehow a lump was form on her throat, a question that she wanted to avoid? The fear of the reality, the new future without Edenbrook somehow… is unimaginable? It was terrifying, yet… life was meant to be that way. A bit of terror, and a pinch of sweetness and a cup of bitterness.

‘…I have a few options in mind…you?’ His eyes didn’t felt brave enough to face hers, he sensed this conversation coming. Their futures had been hanged onto a thread, as Edenbrook faces its downfall.

‘I did some searching too, ever since Dr. Ramsey told us about it. I have been searching here and there, maybe somewhere far, somewhere new? But…’ she paused, as his breath stops for a moment.

‘But?’

‘It’s not home.’ Her eyes gazed into his, a small smile was seen on her face.

He remembers his and Keiki’s conversation in between moments, where he talked to her about the possibility on moving somewhere new due to Edenbrook’s fate. Those conversations live in his mind, even after he dropped her off at Connecticut. Their late-night talks brought his perspective. One of the silver linings of having Keiki at home. Somehow, it felt there is someone could understand his non-sense.

-------------------------------------

He recalls, their conversation.

‘I thought you are done with the new hospital talk?’ She stares upon Bryce who is currently stressed out from the amount of searching he has done during his day off.

‘I know, I guess… I still don’t know.’

Keiki took a seat on the couch, as Bryce lets out a sigh.

‘You have been saying that for a while Bryce, you should have made up your mind by now?’ Keiki questions him as a groan was escaped.

‘I am clueless, these hospitals are the ones I have wanted before; ever since I left college. There are openings for residencies, and … I should be thrilled.’

She raised a brow in question, she knew Bryce. He always knows what he wants, but… in this moment. It felt like he was someone new? Someone who has been influenced by a certain human being that she knows all too well.

‘Is it about Casey?’ Her voice is steady, as she didn’t hesitate. She saw their interactions, and she knew that look he gave her. It was the look of adoration and comfort. Somehow, she noticed how his lips curled into a smile as Casey made her way into their apartment for their daily dinner cook-outs. The way he would become a different person around her, the huge smiles as he finishes talking on the phone. The small moments where she saw him happy, and …. Its because of Casey. Casey Valentine.

‘…I don’t know.’ Somehow he wanted to say yes, somehow moving a new territory felt like the past. The past where he wanted to run away, a chance for him to start new. But, during this time… he loved life, he loves his job, he loves helping people, he loves his friends… and he loved her? He loves her.

‘You will figure it out Bryce, you will always do.’ Keiki said, giving him a hug before getting into bed leaving him there. Somehow, a moment for him to figure it out. The new future, or maybe the updated past? A conflict that has been running in his mind for the past weeks.

-------------------

Those countless nights of searching, and he knew where he wanted to go.

‘….I figure out where I wanted to go.’ He started to speak, as the uncertainty left him a smiled followed. In a split second, he saw the future ahead.

He wanted to go home, the one where he felt like where he is accepted and where he belongs. Looking at her, the hopeful look on her face says it all. She was his home, a cliché saying but… after all these months searching, calculating, struggling and living. The future was seen, a small silhouette of the future where it will end up in a good note.

---------------------

All of them are sitting together once again, talking about the possible futures. As the clock strucks midnight, and a million of memories made throughout the night. He was sober enough to make this decision, sending Keiki was a huge influence in this. The essence of change in life, and this is somehow a new change too.

‘…Bryce, where do you think you’ll be going?’ Sienna asked, as the stars above shining brightly on them.

Bryce took her hand in his, giving it a squeeze.

‘Home.’ Her eyes went wide at the sentence, as somehow… visible tears can be seen by them.

The four of them smiled at one another knowing what it meant, as the conversations followed them deep into the night with a rise of a toast, a new road and new destinations along the way.

The future is unknown, unthinkable. But, deep down. He knows;

He will always be her home, while she would always be his. Forever and always.

#playchoices #bryce x mc #casey valentine #bryce lahela #bryce x f!mc #open heart #open heart second year #fics #anotherbeingsworldwrites

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soheila-1996 · 4 years

Text

My story- part two

Hi! Thank you all so much for all the lovely comments and support I got on the first part! It made me wanna write a second!

My little disclaimer:

I have epilepsy. This details my seizures, I can’t speak for everyone, everyone’s seizures/ experiences are different. This is graphic. Seizures are messy. They aren’t fun and it felt wrong to make it out to be cute when they really aren’t. Pretty much all the things that happen in the plot have happened to me. Well, I’m not married to a king or live in a palace so…there’s that but everything else is accurate. There may be some jokes about it here because I do joke about it sometimes. It makes me more comfortable and I find it helps relax everyone around me. I’m also writing about it because there really aren’t that many fics written about it and I think it’s important to shine light on it.

Any feedback would be really appreciated! :)

Tagging people who shared the first part. You don’t have to read it! I just thought you might want to see what happens: @kacie-0156, @texaskitten30, @cordonianroyalty, @kingliam2019, @bebepac, @kingliam-rys, @cordonia-gothqueen, @kimmiedoo5, @bbrandy2002, @loveellamae, @bobasheebaby

This is also part of wacky drabbles hosted by @emceesynonymroll. The prompt this week is: #38: Please don’t leave.

Paring: Liam and Riley

Warnings: Blood, hospital setting.

Word count: 5261

(Riley’s POV)

I woke up the next morning sore. Everywhere was achy. My tongue felt like it had been speared, I hadn't really noticed it the night before. I was so tired and still a little ‘seizure drunk’ that I hadn't realised.

I’m in my bed but I can’t remember coming to bed the night before. The last thing I remember is coming back to the apartment and explaining to everyone about my epilepsy then we decided to put a movie on- I must have fallen asleep and Liam probably had carried me to bed.

I really don’t deserve him.

I turned over to be met with empty cold sheets. His side of the bed was unmade so he had slept here but he was nowhere in sight. He was probably still mad. I don’t blame him. I'd be a little pissed had I just found out he had a serious medical condition that he never told me about.

I hate talking about it. I don't understand why though. It’s not something I can control or should be ashamed of but in a way I am. I’ve always longed to be normal and before last night everyone thought that I was and I, if i'm being honest, loved it. I revelled in being like everyone else for once.

I turned back onto my back, throwing my head back against the pillow as I let out a drawn out sigh. I feel like I’ve messed everything up. It’s like I’m back when I messed everything up with Tom, my ex, he found out about my epilepsy and left. I had a seizure in front of Ben, another ex, my high school crush, and like Tom, he left after saying some pretty disgusting things to me. I know that my seizures aren't pretty, I know they're scary but I have no control over them. If I had it my way I wouldn't have them.

Jacob- my last boyfriend before Liam, he wasnt as ignorant as the last two. He tried to be there for me like a normal boyfriend but he just couldn't seem to let it go. He was constantly on edge that I'd have a fit. Eventually, it got too much for the both of us and so our relationship came to an end. Now, I’m scared of what’s going to happen with Liam. I don't want to lose him. I love him more than I've ever loved anyone.

I’m just hoping we can find a way to move forward. Together.

A few minutes went by before I decided to throw the comforter off of me and get out of the bed. I winced slightly as I stood. I had forgotten how much my muscles always ache after a seizure. It’s horrible. All of it is horrible.

I opened the bedroom door after taking down my robe off the back then padded toward the kitchen. I lingered outside of the half-closed door when I heard Liam’s voice coming from inside.

“...That’s not the point Drake. The point is what if she had a seizure and no one was there or knew about it? What if she does have one and she’s alone? What if her stubborn nature comes out and she doesn't tell anyone when she’s not feeling well?”

I felt my heart sink down into my stomach. Liam is stressed anyway and I've just added to it. I feel terrible, physically and mentally. He doesn't need to constantly worry about me. I don’t want him to constantly worry about me, he’s my husband not my carer.

I needed to face the music so to speak so I pushed the door fully open. The squeaking of the door opening got both men's attention. It wasn’t until I was fully in the room I realised, Hana and Maxwell were also here too.

Everyone looked at me expectantly, “Liam, all I can do is tell you that I’ll be honest. I’ll tell someone when I'm not feeling well. I know you have no reason to trust me after the stunt I pulled last night but...I’m still the same person I was before last night. Please, please don’t treat me differently,” I’m pleading with him and my friends now although I know I don't really have a right to ask for anything not after all the chaos I’ve caused.

Liam and I briefly locked eyes. Liam sighed and opened his arms. “Come here.”

I didn't hesitate to walk into his embrace. I clung tightly to him. I’m scared and he’s the only thing that ever makes me feel safe. Like everything will be okay.

I felt him wrap his arms around me tighter and place a kiss on the top of my head. “You really scared me last night, Ri,” Liam told me quietly, “I’m just glad you’re okay.” He pecked my head again as he let me go and stepped back.I looked up to him and gave him a reassuring smile. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay,” I nodded, he raised an eyebrow at me. “I’m a bit sore but that’s normal.” Liam nodded. I understood his concerns about me not telling him about how I'm really feeling. I just have always found it difficult to be honest about it.

A few moments of awkward silence went by. No one knows what to say, I don’t know what to say or how we go from here. There’s no guide on what to do when your wife of two years drops an epilepsy bombshell.

Drake finally broke the silence, “His Majesty over here was just bragging about how, he, in his own words ‘make the best pancakes.’ We were just about to put that to the test, weren’t we Li? Before Brooks interrupted.”

I saw Liam’s eyebrows crease as he looked to his oldest friend. Drake shot him a look enough to tell him to just go along with it.

Liam smiled, it was his fake, forced one. I could always tell, his real one always showed his pearly white teeth and reached his eyes. This one his lips were in a tight line and his eyes didn't twinkle.

“Yeah,” he nodded.

I, of course, knew it was a cover but I was thankful for Drake’s distraction. Drake and I sat down on one side of the table and Maxwell and Hana on the other as Liam got started on mixing together the ingredients.

A little while later, we all had our own plates full with pancakes. We all dug in silently. It was awkward, not a comfortable silence at all.

I placed my fork down just as everyone else was just finishing there’s. I hadn’t finished all of mine, when I chewed the cut on the side of my tongue brushed painfully up against my teeth.

“Guys…,” I started but was promptly cut off by Maxwell. I could tell last night that he was hurt I didn’t tell him.

“Just promise us that you’ll tell us when you’re not feeling well next time, Little Blossom.”

“That and take your medication,” I heard Drake mumble from beside me.

“Okay,” I nodded, ignoring Drake’s snarky comment. “I’ll tell one of you.”

“Promise?” Maxwell asked me.

“I promise.”

Maxwell held out his pinky. I promptly wrapped my own little finger around his from across the table. “You can’t break a pinky promise,” Maxwell reiterated.

“I know, Max,” I sighed as I let go of him and placed both my hands back down into my lap.

“We’re all just worried about you,” Hana spoke up. I nodded in understanding. Here comes the pity party. “But we can get through anything together.”

We all stayed there for a little while, each of them reiterating how much they loved and supported me. They were honestly the best group of friends I could ever have asked for. They loved me no matter what and I loved them too.

Later that day, I discovered the surprise Liam had in store was a trip to go to our honeymoon island in a couple weeks time. Our diaries were both packed and that was the only time we could make the trip. Leo and Katie also had headed back to the States that evening.

They had all checked in now and again but not too annoyingly. It had been a bit overboard over the first couple of days but their overprotectiveness was easing off a bit. Thankfully.

I still was having trouble sleeping and not getting enough so I started sometimes having a nap during the day when I had the time to do so. Liam had taken on some of my responsibilities, I hadn't been pleased about that but I needed to sort my sleep out and he was aware that a lack of sleep and stress was a massive trigger for me.

Everything had changed that night but nothing really changed- if that makes sense? For two years my condition had been my dirty little secret and now it was finally out in the open, I was hardly going to go shouting it from any rooftops anytime soon but I felt much closer to everyone. I hadn't realised how much I had been distancing myself.

Liam had taken it better than I had expected. He, of course, was worried but he didn't overwhelm me with it. He asked me questions about it as well as doing research on my type of seizures to try and understand as much as he could. He wasn't like Jacob, he could at times be overbearing with his desire to know everything about my condition.

If I was honest all of my friends had been phenomenal. It was only our tight knit group that knew about it still. I didn't feel a need to announce it to an entire country and so I didn’t.

All in all, I felt better than I had for a long, long time.

I still should have told everyone about it at the beginning but my fear that they’d see me differently, that they’d treat me differently had gotten in the way but they had all proven me wrong time and time again.

It was the day of The Five Kingdoms festival, It had originally meant to have been a few weeks ago but the weather had been appalling so it was rearranged for a day with much nicer, inviting weather. It's the only day of the year that the palace is open to the Cordonian Public so naturally we wanted as many of our citizens as possible to attend.

Liam and I had been gallivanting around the palace grounds, playing games and talking with our people. It was the normalcy that I had always wanted, with a husband who didn't treat me like I’m made of glass.

A little while later, I slipped back inside the palace and headed to the nearest toilet which ended up being in my apartment. I’ve lived here for two years and I still don't know where anything is. I needed to go and couldn't hold it in any more. I had tried to find one of my friends or husband just to let them know in case they needed me but the crowd was massive so it was like trying to find a needle in a haystack so I headed in on my own. It wasn’t a big deal. I didn’t need a babysitter.

I had just done what was needed and was standing by the sink, washing my hands when I felt my stomach roll.

Oh no.

I, initially, ignore it. I had been ignoring feeling sick for a little while, I thought it was just because I haven't eaten much today but then my arms started to go numb and I know what’s coming. I’m all alone and I know I won't be able to make it to Liam or one of my friends in time.

“Oh no, no, ” I whispered to myself. I reached into my back pocket in my pants and pulled out my cellphone as I carefully lowered myself down onto the cold, bathroom tiles.

Still sitting up, I unlocked my phone and looked for Drake’s contact. I know Liam doesn't take his phone with him to royal events.

I fumbled with the device, my arm doesn't want to cooperate properly. I hit a contact, I just hope it’s the correct one.

Everything is becoming confusing again. I lie down with the phone beside me. I don’t really remember where I am and why I’m here.

I heard the phone ringing in the distance and Drake’s gruff voice come through on the other end. “Brooks?”

I don’t know what to say, I’m not sure what to say so I don’t talk. “Brooks, are you okay?”

I try to speak but it comes out as a whimper. Why is this happening again?! I took my meds, I followed the rules!

Drake’s tone changed, “Brooks, talk to me. What’s wrong?”

It takes more effort than it should but I manage to get out a jumbled sentence, “I dun’t feel good,” my voice is slurred, I’m talking like a child.

I vaguely hear Drake curse. “Okay...Where are you?” He sounds out of breath to me.

I looked around me. I’m not sure where I am.

Am I on the ceiling?

I don’t understand.

My head fell to the side, no I'm on the floor, I’m sure. It’s cold under my back. I still can't figure it out though.

I can’t think.

I can’t tell Drake where I am!

“I-I don-” I started, my voice is so slurred I don't think Drake can understand me. “S-scared,” I squeaked. That's all I know right now. I’m scared.

“I know. It’s going to be okay.” I don’t remember Drake’s voice being so echoey. “Riley, listen to me...you need to tell me where you are.”

Drake’s not here but I can hear him. How?

I feel myself beginning to gag and I’m sure Drake hears it too because he’s telling me to roll over onto my side. That’s hard. My limbs don't want to cooperate but I manage it and the vile stuff easily flows out of my mouth.

My fear mounts. What’s happening to me?!

I can’t focus on anything, my eyes are darting around the room. It’s making me more dizzy and disoriented but I need to know where I am.

“Li-” I’m trying to talk again but my voice is still jumbled.

“It’s Drake,” he told me. Drake? I don’t understand. It sounds familiar but I can't picture him.

I- Where am I?

I try to move but I can’t. My limbs feel heavy and I don’t have the strength to lift them anymore.

I just want this all to stop!

(Drake POV)

I’m weaving in and out of the crowd around me, my phone still against my ear. Riley’s scared whimpers coming through from the other end. I can hear my heart pounding in my ears. Riley is like my sister and she’s scared, in trouble and I don’t know where she is so I can help her. I need to find Liam and I need to find her but I don’t know where either of them are!

I know she’s still conscious, she’s mumbling something incoherent. I’m trying my best to reassure her but I don’t think she understands.

Finally, I found Liam. He’s apple bobbing with someone. I ran over to him, Bastien is standing near him and is the first to notice the panicked look on my face. I walked past Bas and straight to Liam, I tapped him on the shoulder. He immediately stood back up to his full height turning to face me.

“What’s wrong?” He asked me, his eyebrow creased with concern.

“It’s Riley,” I told him. I quickly passed him the phone as we stepped away from the now curious onlookers. “I can’t get her to tell me where she is. I think she's going to have a seizure.” Liam eagerly took the phone out of my hand, putting it immediately to his ear.

(Liam’s POV)

Drake had just handed me his phone telling me that my wife was going to have a seizure and nobody knows where she is!

I can hear her scared whimpers coming through the other end. “Love? Riley, can you hear me?” I asked. Panic is evident in my tone but I’m really trying to keep myself composed.

I really am.

Last time was terrifying but at least that time people were there to help her. I was there to help her. This time nobody is there to help.

“Riley?” I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. I’m sure it's about to come right out of my ribcage if it carries on.

Drake, Bastien and I are now walking inside the palace. It was only Riley’s voice coming from the other end so we made the evaluation that she wasn’t outside in the crowd and must be back in the palace somewhere.

She’s not talking but I can hear her crying. “Love? Riley, can you talk to me please?”

“I don–” I heard her stutter. I can hear in her voice that she’s scared and confused. “What is…? I don’t…” She said, trailing off.

“Riley, it’s okay,” I told her but it’s not. None of this is okay, “You’re just a little bit confused, sweetheart. That’s all.”

Through her sobs she said, “Li? I don’t feel good.”

“It’s okay, Riley. It’s all going to be alright,” I told her, trying to soothe her. We’re still walking around the palace- well, actually we're running around like mad men but we need to find her.

So many things are going through my head, so many worst case scenarios. I can barely hear myself think. I just need to find her, if I find her It’ll all be okay.

“Li, I dun’t feel glood,” She told me again. Her words have become more jumbled now. She’s speaking to me like a child who's just learning their first words. That’s okay though, I know she’s still awake and I’ve still got time to find her.

I froze mid-step as I heard her crying stop and then less than a second later, heard the sickening sound of her limbs flailing and hitting the floor below her. “Shit. Shit. Shit,” I whispered to myself.

My eyes widened as my panic mounted.

I listened closely, hearing for anything that could suggest where she is..then I heard it, dogs barking in the background.

She’s in the apartment!

I started running, not giving Drake or Bastien any indication of where I was going or an explanation.

I was on the other side of the palace!

I don’t think I've ever ran this fast in my life. I can hear Drake and Bastien behind me, I assume they’re both aware of what’s happening by now. I can still hear her limbs hitting the floor and the dogs barking in the background.

I’m really starting to panic. My legs aren't taking me to our apartment fast enough. I need to get to her! Now!

Another minute, another minute too long and I finally rounded the last corner, it took me slightly off balance as my left foot skidded but I managed to get back on track.

My lungs feel like they’re screaming for air but I don’t stop. I can see the door now!

Finally, I reached it and threw it open. I was greeted by both of the also panicked looking corgis, scratching at my legs. I looked around, she’s not in the living room, kitchen, bedroom.

I left the bedroom and headed down another little corridor and saw the bathroom door closed. I don't waste any time opening it.

I opened it hurriedly but cautiously. I don't know where she is and I don’t want to hurt her. Luckily, she’s in the middle of the floor. She’s not seizing anymore, she’s laying flat on her back. Her eyes are slightly open but I don't think she’s awake.

I don’t waste any time getting down on my knees beside her. I quickly placed Drake’s phone down away from us, there’s a little bit of blood pooling out from the corner of her mouth and I notice the sick on the other side of her. I don’t know how long she’s been laying here like this. The phone had cut off a little while ago.

I quickly pull her towards me, over onto her side. A little bit of blood flows from her mouth and onto the bathroom floor tiles.

Something feels really wrong to me. Her breathing isn't right. I placed my hand on her chin and opened her mouth properly. She gags and coughed as more of the blood tinged spit came out.

“It’s alright, Love,” I whisper quietly to her.

(Riley’s POV)

My eyes fluttered open slightly. Whatever I’m laying on is cold beneath me. I can see a figure in front of me only a few inches away and that’s when I start to panic .

My vision is disfigured.

I can’t hear.

I can’t move.

I feel something behind me, jumping up on me. I don't know what it is but I don’t want it touching me!

What is it?!

Get it off!

I try to squirm away and whatever I was is pulled away from me. I didn’t get far, I’m so tired and my body doesn't want to cooperate with me.

Why is it so hard to breathe?

I look around again, there’s something by my face which I soon discover is my own hand.

What’s happening to me?

I can feel somebody touching me- that figure in front of me placed a hand on my arm. I try to get away but I’m unable to.

….Why can’t I breathe properly?

It feels like I’ve drank some water and it’s gone down the wrong way. I’m coughing and gagging, trying to get rid of this feeling but it’s not going away. Why isn't it going away?!

My mouth hurts, stung by what tastes like vomit.

My hearing starts to return to me and my vision begins to sharpen. The figure in front of me moves so their face is in my eye line. It’s Liam.

I still don’t understand what’s happening. All I know is that it’s hard to breathe. Why?

My ability to think hasn't quite returned to me yet. I don’t remember how I ended up here.

I’m staring at Liam now as I splutter about, trying to get air to my agitated feeling chest. I think he’s figured out that i can see and hear him now. He slightly titles his head at me, giving me a soft, comforting smile.

“Hi, love. It’s okay. I’m here now.”

I gripped at my chest. Good, my arms are working again. “ C’breathe,” I tried to say. My sentence was rudely interrupted by a choking sensation that i tried to swallow down but that just made me cough more

I’m still really confused. The last thing I remember is just a sense of dread, pure fear.

“What’s hap-” My sentence is cut off by another coughing fit. I felt him as he started running his fingers soothingly through my hair.

“You had a seizure,” he explained to me calmly,” But you’re okay now.” I nodded, it all slowly but surely starting to come back to me.

(Liam’s POV)

It really is breaking my heart to see Riley struggling and I can’t do anything to help her. I wish I could take all of her pain away from her. She’s the most amazing person I've ever met and doesn't deserve this.

She seems drowsier to me than she did last time. While Riley was waking up Bastien had told me he had called an ambulance as a precaution while we were looking for her and now it’s looking like it’s actually needed. She really is struggling to breathe properly.

A few minutes go by and she’s still not fully alert. Her eyes looked up to meet mine, her eyes fluttering as another coughing fit. I smiled reassuringly down at her, ��It’s okay. Paramedics are coming and they’re going to help you breathe better, okay?” She nodded sleepily.

She coughed again and foamy, blood tinged spit came out. I could see her trying to turn further onto her side but she was struggling. Too weak to do the task on her own. I help her gently back over.

“Liam,” She gasped as she finished emptying out what she could.

“It’s okay, I’m here.” I gently rubbed her shoulder as I tried to soothe her the best I could. I feel powerless.

I heard some voices outside of the bathroom- one I recognize and two I didn’t. Drake had taken the dogs away, so they weren't being a nuisance and Bastien had been waiting for the paramedics to arrive, which was who I presumed who he was showing in now.

Riley flinched when the sound of boots and the rustling of bags could be heard, as the medics made their way into the bathroom. I had moved out of the way and sat down by her feet. I kept a comforting hand on her calf so she knew I was there and wasn’t going to go anywhere.

It was like I was trapped inside of my own head again, like I had been the first time I had witnessed it. It’s the worst feeling in the world when someone you love more than anything is struggling and there’s nothing you can do to help them.

I hate this.

I had seemed to have zoned out, getting trapped back inside my head, where so many scenarios were racing. The paramedics were treating my wife with a level of urgency that scared me. They had mentioned being concerned about how she was breathing and made quick work of getting out of the palace and into the awaiting ambulance.

I should have been there! If I had been there then this wouldn’t be happening right now. I should have been there to protect her!

After a quick ride in the ambulance, we arrived at the hospital, where doctors and nurses immediately got to treating my wife.

Like I had guessed, she had aspirated on her blood and spit. After I found out about her epilepsy I had done a lot of research and looked into possible complications. I knew that having that much fluid in your lungs is dangerous. The doctors had kept her on oxygen and given her some medication. She could breathe easier now, thankfully.

Riley was stable now and had been admitted. I was just relieved that she was going to be okay. I was so, so scared when Drake initially told me and then when I found her that fear only tripled.

The entire experience had been traumatising for both me and her.

I never wanted to let her out of my sight again if I’m being honest. I don’t ever want her to be scared, alone and in danger like that ever again. I don't ever want to fail in helping her again. It feels like I’ve failed to protect the one person that means the absolute world to me. The only person that I’m sure I wouldn’t ever be able to live without. I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself for that.

I headed down the hospital corridor to her room. She was fast asleep in the bed. She looked so tiny and vulnerable. I hate seeing her like this.

Drake had kindly dropped off a bag for us both, I placed it down by the chair beside her bed as I sunk down into it. It was now the early evening. I’m not entirely sure what had happened with the festival after I left. All I had been told was that Madeleine had ‘handled it’ whatever that meant.

I keep thinking over what happened today. This all could have gone very, very differently.

I try hard to keep back the tears pricking at my eyes but I ultimately fail. I can’t keep them in. I’m so scared of something happening to Riley, like what happened today, or something so much worse. I’m scared of losing her. She means everything to me.

I quietly get to my feet. I’m planning on just going for a little walk to clear my head. She’s asleep and I know she’s safe here. As I’m about to walk away her hand gripped onto my wrist. I stopped and looked down at her.

Her eyes sleepily opened fully, “Please don’t leave.”

“Okay,” I said, sitting back down in the chair and looking over at her.

Riley rubbed at her tired eyes then scooted over in the bed. She patted the space next to her, “Get in with me,” she ordered me so of course I complied after slipping my shoes off. I wrapped my arms around her as she rested her head against my chest.

We lay like that for a few minutes. The silence was broken when I couldn't hold in a sob anymore. Riley sat up slightly, looking up at me. She took one of her hands and wiped away the tear that was falling down my cheek.

I don’t understand how she’s doing this. I’m supposed to be comforting her, not the other way around.

“I love you,” I blurted out. My voice cracked and my bottom lip quivered.

“I love you too,” She said, as she snuggled up closer against me.

I sniffled then wiped at my now irritated, red, puffy eyes. “I didn’t mean to wake you. I’m sorry.”

(Riley’s POV)

I’m so overwhelmed with guilt right now. I knew this would happen if Liam were to ever find out. I knew he’d blame himself for everything, he always does. It breaks my heart to know my husband is devastated because my brain can't just behave itself.

This is what I was more scared of.

I’ve always been treated differently because of my condition- the sad thing is I’m used to it. It’s been a part of my life since I was a little kid. It’s all I really know. I could deal with Liam being overprotective- well, more than he already is to begin with over him being heartbroken over something, neither him or myself, can control.

I snuggled closer against him. I just want to be close to him right now.

A short while later, Liam’s sniffling stops and I look up at him again. Tears are pricking at my eyes as I figure out how to word my next sentence of the offer I had been thinking over and over for the last few minutes. “I don’t want to hurt you…” Damn, the tears are already starting to flow. “If you love someone then you let them go...I’m giving you an out because I don’t want to hurt you. I-I don't want this stupid condition to ruin your life too.”

Liam didn't say anything to start with. My heart sinks as I think he’s considering my offer. Unexpectedly, he pulled me tighter against him and pecked the top of my head. “I’m never going to leave you. I love you too much to let you go.”

I let out a loud half laugh, half-cry of relief. I don’t want to lose him either. Saying that sentence obliterated my heart.

I sniffled, “I love you too much to let you go too.”

#my story #tw seizure #liam x riley #the royal romance #wacky drabbles

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