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#so feels like their experiences have been a lot different than mine
dumb-doll-lips · 11 months
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I don’t know enough people to ask, but if you’re a woman maybe around early to mid 30s, how often do you talk to your mom? Like idk what range of answers even make sense for a survey, surveys feel more fun. I’m sick of feeling like such a bad guy bc i don’t want to talk everyday and would like more space.
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sciderman · 6 months
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I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain
Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it
i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)
really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!
undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.
i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.
people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.
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peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.
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it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."
so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.
people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.
autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.
#a lot of my traits have been exacerbated lately and i remember it was much easier for me before#and some of my friends have said “oh it's because you've been masking too long and now you're facing autistic burnout.”#and that made sense to me i think.#but then i found out about the stress thing. me overproducing stress hormone. and that's a very physical thing.#and that explains why i've been overstimulated more than usual lately. and why everything feels like too much.#and i wonder how many of these traits of mine are going to subside once i have lamar removed#and it makes me wonder a lot of things. and it's so weird how much your brain is tied to your biology.#i wonder how much i'll change. i wonder how i'll feel. i wonder if i'll still feel like me. i wonder how much me is me right now.#and how much of me is being altered by weird freaky hormones. who am i?? who will i be??#i'm almost looking at this as like. a superhero origin story of some sort. like this is my spider-bite moment. maybe.#will i be different? will i cope with things differently?? now that my body isn't fighting something anymore??#maybe i'll be normal. i don't know. i don't know.#i don't know what it'll mean for me.#but all of these things mean i relate to peter parker in a certain kind of way#i don't think you have to be diagnosed with autism to recognise and empathise with those traits i think#i think everyone can see themselves in peter. and i think that's the benefit of having characters that aren't diagnosed.#because there's so much overlap in the human experience. and certain feelings aren't exclusive to just one group of people.#peter has such a rich identity actually. it's an autistic thing. it's a queer thing. it's a jewish thing. it's a trauma thing.#there are so many overlapping parts of peter's identity that inform who he is and how he behaves and it's never just one thing.#it's a product of all of his things.#just like me! just like everyone.#so me? i guess i can be a million things. you can explain what i am in a million different ways.#a hundred different psychologists can all come up with different ways to explain why i be the way i be.#i don't think it's something that can be simplified.#sorry wow. i'm really going off here in the tags.#i hope people don't think i'm stupid. i don't know brain science. i'm just philosophising as usual.#sci speaks
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j-esbian · 28 days
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i lost the post but i saw someone talking about how some of y’all act like being weird is a choice and like. YEAHHHHHHH.
that’s fine, it might be for you. but i just live like this and don’t know any other way. like yeah i’ve worked customer service, i can do innocuous small talk, but anything beyond that, i don’t understand what i’m missing. and it’s frustrating to see the tonal disconnect especially from people who are like “uwu embrace weirdness!!” where they’re like. dressing quirky and talking about bugs and listening to obscure music and eschewing small talk to ask Deep Questions on the first date and unlearning their tendency to not infodump. and generally have an idea of what Weirdness is supposed to look like. idk man some of us wake up and get out of bed and can’t figure out why the rest of their coworkers chitchat with each other but when they join the conversation it dies.
weirdness is value neutral. let’s stop trying to turn it into a badge because quite frankly, it’s not a choice for everyone. it’s fucking exhausting to never be on the same wavelength as other people and they’re going to react the way they do and label you the way they will without any conscious actions on your end. it’s difficult to talk about this without feeling like you’ll be dismissed as immature, a teenager whining “no one understands me” but the thing is. sometimes you don’t grow out of feeling alone and different, and there’s no good way to talk about it without feeling like people will think you’re just fishing for pity.
#most of it is stuff i can’t help like!!!#coworkers and i don’t share a lot of interests so i’m always like. yes i’ve heard of that show but haven’t seen it. no idk that band sorry#and they’ll like. talk shit abt other people who share my interests without realizing that i also like those things#so i just have to sit there and take it#i feel like i don’t have a lot in common with my friends even. a few shared interests but very different lives#in my experience the conscious choice has been to try to keep up with what’s popular but it’s just. not interesting to me#i got bored and forgot to finish s2 of stranger things and never picked it back up#even alt subcultures have gone kinda mainstream and i never quite slot in#let’s not even touch the gay culture ‘flags’ that are extremely online and unrelatablr#and the most frustrating thing. every time i try to talk about myself and my interests i feel people shutting down#one person i know. open mouth sighs in exasperation when i open my mouth#i don’t know why you’re making it my problem that we’re different#i know there is supposed to be a niche out there for everyone but some of that feels like#those niches are falling prey to marketability. if you’re too far out of the mainstream. too out of touch. it can’t be helped#a lot of messaging online is like. embrace weirdness but only if it’s subversive in a very specific way#too normal to hang out with self-proclaimed proud weirdos. too weird to hang out with normies#like i thought the thing was to disavow performativity. i’m sorry i don’t find the same things interesting#i don’t care about the office and you don’t care about the hundred years’ war. that’s fine. why is that seen as a personal fault of mine#i feel like some of the reaction i get might be bc it comes across as hipster shit. idk#i’m literally just oblivious and looking for any kind of indicator for social interaction#but so often it feels like the onus of finding common ground is on me. i have to listen abt things idk but no one cares what i have to say#i think what makes it more frustrating is this reaction from people who claim to not care. do their own thing#and then get annoyed when i do mine and it’s. different#instead of being like ‘fuck the mainstream! conformity is bullshit! be yourself!’ it’s like#‘fuck the mainstream because it doesn’t appeal to me personally and i’ve made my own club!’#and this is not going to come out right because i’m just at my limit and venting and don’t know how to say things the right way#so people don’t misunderstand me#i just happen to never like the Right Things and know the Right Things and act the Right Way and idk how else to say it other than#can we be more normal about weird people#idk it’s hard to talk abt this without sounding like i’m just complaining but i’m more bewildered and trying to state things as i see them
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kavehater · 5 months
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Staring at my keyboard because I don’t even know what to say to all this *gestures at everyone and my life* /neg
#dora daily#never ceases to amaze me just how different people’s lives are from mine like#you guys actually somewhat tolerate living ? that’s interesting#my day consists of the equivalent of staring at the way#staring at the wall*#and getting disrespected and screamed at like daily#I am not even going to start to say how lonely it is because like genuinely I’ll be wasting my breath I’m tired of saying it and nothing#changing#I’m tired of taking steps to not being lonely anymore and nothing changing#I’m tired of seeing people having things I’ve been slaving towards so easily yet I have nothing and they have everything#I worked so hard for these few things and they’re pathetic compared to everything else#everyone else’s things that they get with such little effort or less effort than they could dream of when compared to me#I am depressed severely; I don’t have a lot energy I can expend so freely yet I try#but even the level of my trying would always be more than a sane persons efforts#how is that fair#they say better things happen but the good things are just small specks of goodness that later on make me feel bad#so they’re not remotely good anyways#to the point now I’m just horrified of the concept of things getting better because it’ll be like some uncanny valley experience#after almost 20 yrs it’s a bit too late for things to get better and truthfully I don’t know if I want it to be better because this dumpster#dumpster fire* has been all I’ve known
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yanderenightmare · 4 months
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TW: angst, toxic traits, somewhat bullying, breakup
fem reader
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You’re his first girlfriend. He’d never bothered with anything serious before—it seemed too messy to trifle with. He doesn’t know why he suddenly decided. Suppose he’d been feeling a little bored, and something within him saw you as a fool-proof opportunity.
It wasn’t because you were anything special. Actually, it was more the opposite. You didn’t seem like too big of a risk. You were just a normal, honest, nice person—a bit of a loser, too, if he was being honest. He could do a lot better and pick someone of the same caliber as him, someone with a cooler style and presence, but then he’d only get caught up in the competition.
You were more to his appetite—a dorky, blushy lil’ nerd who giggled nervously at everything he said. In other words, no competition at all. You’d never dare break his heart because you frankly couldn’t afford it. And he found solace in that imbalance—knowing he held all the cards and that you could only be grateful he’d chosen you.
At least, that had been what he’d thought. But then, here you are, holding his hands from across the table in a cute little sundae café, telling him how this just can’t work anymore.
He’s confused for a whole minute before it sinks in.
You’re breaking up with him.
He’s confused afterward, too.
You’re breaking up with him?
That can’t be right. You must be joking. He almost laughs, almost cackles, but ends up staying completely silent. Something about that pitiful look in your eye makes his throat tight, and he almost thinks he’s going to cry instead. 
You’re breaking up with him. You, with him. His foot starts to tap. Have you hit your head or something? You’re dressed in a hoodie, for crying out loud, with not an ounce of make-up on—effortless, as if his perception of you wasn’t any of your concern while you’re fucking breaking up with him.
No way. There’s just no way. You must be confused about something, is all. There’s absolutely no way you’re doing this.
“What are you talking about?” It comes angry. Louder than he’d intended, enough to make you jolt in your seat. A couple of heads even turn your way. You wait for them to turn back before answering.
“I just think we’re a bit too different. And… I don’t know…” You were trying to find ways of telling him you weren’t in love with him but ended up deciding it was unnecessary—it wasn’t exactly something he needed to hear even though you had a lot you could say.
You’re rude and arrogant and treat me like some rescue pet you’ve nurtured back to health. You act like you’re embarrassed to be with me even though you’re the one without any friends. You’re selfish and spoiled and—
“If you don’t know, then there’s nothing to talk about. Quit being silly.” He has a furrow between his brows as he picks up the pink menu between the two of you, scanning the different types of milkshakes you could share and forget all about it. After all, you weren’t breaking up with him—that would just be absurd. “Let’s get strawberry.”
“No—”
“Guess we could get mango if you want that instead—”
“I’m not sharing drinks with you—”
“What? You tryna lose weight or something? Not like anyone but me is gonna see you when all you wear are those baggy hoodies all the time. Speaking of which, you should wear mine instead, they’d suit you better—”
“Listen.” You stop his rambling. “I’m not sharing drinks, and I’m not wearing your clothes. I’m not being silly, either. I’m being serious. It’s over—”
“No, it’s not.” His fist bangs against the table—the look in his eye on edge and twitchy. “I asked you why, and you had no good reason—so it’s not, not until you convince me.”
You had wanted to avoid it, but it seems he wouldn’t allow you the grace to spare him. That being said, you hadn’t meant to be so brutally honest…
“You’re a narcissist. You don’t treat me like a girlfriend. I’m more like a charity case or some type of experiment to you. Half the time, it feels as though you’re just playing a game with everyone in your life like pawns for you to shuffle around the board as you see fit.” You’re the one with the furrowed brows now, unable to bite your tongue as you’d kept it in all this time. “I think you should seek help and get your controlling tendencies straightened out before having any type of relationship. Or don’t. In any case, I don’t think I’m the right girl for you.”
There’s a silence. The chatter of the café seems distant. You feel half inclined to apologize as you look at him and stare down the glassy tabletop as if trying to find his reflection for comfort—but then he beats you to the punch.
“You’re right…” he starts softly, mustering the words, and you’re almost proud to see him take it so well, but then there’s a viscousness to his next words. “You’re not the right girl for me.”
When he looks up again, his face is warped—callous and seemingly disgusted by the sight of you. Something about it even seems to lash out at you, seeking revenge.
“I can’t believe I thought I saw something in you,” he sighs. “Turns out you’re exactly what everyone warned me you would be—just a plane-boring old Jane. What a joke—wasting so much time on something so worthless. Forget breaking up with me, I should have broken up with you a long time ago.”
He gets up in a rush and bears over the table, both palms laid flat upon the surface.
“Charity case?” he seethes, then conjures a fake laugh and an even faker grin. “I couldn’t have put it better myself. Enjoy sitting here alone like the loser you are.”
And even though you’re the one watching him walk away while ordering a chocolate sundae for yourself, you can’t help but feel sorry for the poor guy… 
That had been the most emotion you’d ever witnessed come from him.
Obviously, he doesn’t take it very well, stumbling through the café before bursting out the door, but even he’s surprised by how disheveled it had made him. He’s hyperventilating when the fresh air hits him, almost sprinting to his car so that he can lock himself inside it.
But the car only makes it worse as he’s far from alone in there. You’re everywhere. On the hood, waiting for him with a smile. In the rearview mirror, waving at him. In the seat next to him with a pout, asking if you can stay over. In the backseat, naked with a coy twinkle in your eye.
He knows! He has some of your underwear at home—he’ll threaten to pass them around campus unless you beg him to take you back. No, what’s he thinking!? You’ll never come back to him that way. Fuck, what can he do, what’s he supposed to do!? He just called you worthless—what that fuck was he thinking?!
The tears startle him as they drip down and splash upon his whitening knuckles, where he grips the wheel for dear life even as the car stays completely still—safe and sound in the same plot.
There’s a light pink lip balm on the dash. Yours. You must have left it there—maybe on purpose? No… you don’t play games like that. You’d been honest in the café. The fact terrifies him—his heart seems to want to reject it at all costs, the way it tears in his chest.
He picks the slim pink stick up and rolls it around in his hand, which can’t seem to stop shaking. You’d sat on his lap in this very seat, laughing at something dumb he’d said while applying the very same balm on his lip—kissing his forehead while saying something sweet. He knows it wasn’t, but he imagines you’d whispered that you loved him.
When he smears the balm around his lips this time, he imagines kissing you and your soft lips and that everpresent smile he never bothered telling you was pretty.
He’s such an idiot. The birds in the parking lot take flight at the jostling of his car, but no one hears the roar.
And as he sits there in the following silence, wallowing in his own self-pity and regret, he can’t help but feel like the lead of some angsty teen romance.
And like the lead in an angsty teen romance, he swears… whatever it takes… he will win you back.
You will be his again.
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♡ BNHA – Bakugou, Dabi, Hawks ♡ JJK – Gojo, Naoya, some young type of Sukuna, or Toji ♡ HQ – Tsukishima, Oikawa, Sakusa, Miya twins ♡ BLLK – Reo ♡ AOT – Eren
♡ FEM x M INSERT masterlist ♡ GN x M INSERT masterlist
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yrieso · 1 year
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tonight i am thinking about how it really pisses me off when i tell people my dads deaf and a lot of people's immediate response is "im sorry" like bitch i said he's deaf not DEAD why do you feel the need to say im sorry. like really, why do you think you should apologize for that? huh?
#it's just. hmmm urg. it's infuriating!!!!#next time someone says that im gonna say ''and im sorry yours is brunette. you see hoe stupid that sounds? that's how stop YOU sound rn''#like idk it might be different if he went deaf later in life but my dad went deaf when he was 4 months old so it's not like#i've had the experience of having a hearing dad and suddenly i don't??? it's literally been my whole life AND his whole life too#im too tired to really articulated my thoughts on this but i feel like i shouldn't really have to explain#why it's so stupid and frustrating to me when you tell me you're sorry my dad is deaf right after learning that#my dad being deaf has had almost 0 negative impact on my life and it's actually given me a lot of cool things#like i wouldn't have learned sign language if he were hearing!! do u know how cool it is to#know a whole other LANGUAGE with your parents and how good it feels to flex that you know more than#your siblings bc they only know the basics of asl#because it feels SO GOOD to flex that#i get to watch tv with my dad at loud volumes that my friends dont get in their house#i learned to read earlier because i was always used to reading captions on the tv and im a quick reader too#when YOU flick the lights on and off your dad would be annoyed. MINE knows im trying to get his attention and he can't hear me#if i don't want to see what he's saying i just take my glasses off. problem solved.#idk i have a lot of thoughts about this but i've ranted and rambled enough in the tags#yriesodottumblrdotcom
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notherpuppet · 2 months
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Do you think there's a right and/or wrong way to handle QPR? I know it's a tricky relationship, but it feels like most/some people kind of just slap the label onto a ship while depicting the ship as just romantic/having no difference with a romantic relationship. (this is why I was a little surprised when you said you do radioapple qpr when it reads a lot more like normal romance). Not meant as an attack or anything on anyone, just genuinely curious more than anything. Again, tricky relationship
So Imma put this link to info at the top of this post: https://taaap.org/2022/07/16/qprs-part-one/
Alright, so please take what I say with a grain of salt, because that's exactly what it is. One small bit of perspective in a mass of many people who experience QPRs in their life and/or are on an aro/ace spectrum. I also have NO QUALIFICATIONS on gender/sexuality theory, so my opinions are shaped by what I've learned and experienced personally. While people may identify with the same term, we are all still individuals with our own experiences. Words can help describe a phenomenon, but it doesn't make everyone who identifies with the word into a monolith.
So I've stated a few times that I navigate shipping Alastor similar to my own experiences as an aroace person. (I guess I'm sharing about myself with this post, but I think that can be helpful to just spreading awareness of an "alternative lifestyle"). So I'm romance-repulsed and sex-repulsed LOL but I'm also "positive" about those things. Like I view romance and sex as lovely, fun experiences people can have, but I've never been into it personally. It's fun for me to consume media about romance/sex, but yknow, it's also fun for me to consume media about violence or isolation. Doesn't mean I want to experience or engage in any of those things lol.
Anyway, I'm a huge people person and I love to party and yknow it seems most people are really wanting to fall in love or fuck or whatever pretty much all the time, but especially at parties hahaha. Normally, I'm pretty touch-averse, but I love dancing so much and it's a blast to dance with a partner (salsa especially!! i don't care for grinding for probably obvious reasons). And to connect the two previous sentences, people (whatever gender they are) would be very kissy-touchy on the dancefloor. Which i honestly dont really give a fuck about hahaha. I don't really get anything out of kissing but I also don't mind it. I just like to dance. It's all a pretty superficial--but still genuinely fun--experience for me.
When it comes to my deeper or more intimate connections, I have had friendships that have felt SO on the line of what was viewed as a romantic relationship. They were exceptional friends and we connected on a level that was deep and true, but it wasn't romantic. Sometimes we'd slow dance, sometimes we kissed, and it rocked. But it wasn't more than that, it was all that it needed to be. I didn't want more and neither did they (except one situation and so we had to stop being friends lol whoops). From the outside, people would even refer to us as partners in a half joking way, but we really were just friends. And I love those friends!! And a huge part of what made those relationships (which at the time were described as 'situationships' because we didn't know any of these terms haha) was their convenience. We either lived in the same building, worked together, or were neighbors LOL. I'm still friends with those absolutely lovely folks, but we don't live around each other, so our QPR just appears a lot more like any ole regular friendship. But it's not like there was a feeling that we transitioned into something different than before. It twas what it twas! (Had to take a pause while I was typing to reminisce fondly for a second, okay back to hazbin hahaha)
SO, whenever someone asks or it comes up, MOST OF THE TIME I do ship alastor through an aroace lens and experience with QPRs (specifically, MINEE because they were fun and I've never felt like doing this before I met a character like Al). And my XP is: "this isn't gonna be a partnership and we ain't fucking" LMFAO. so yeah!
When it comes to using a queer term like QPR, I just hope folks are considerate in their writing, but I also am inclined to just believe them if they say that's their intention because QPRs can look very different. Again, aroace and ace folks are not a monolith. The terms help to describe a human's experience. I'm inclined to think people are writing in good faith.
And all this being said, I want to just emphasize that I really don't think it's necessary to consider any of this shit if you want to ship a fictional character. I understand wanting to be protective of a character who shares an identifier with you (I personally don't wanna see romance/sex with Al in canon). But shipping is a fun thing a fandom does that often does ignore canon. Tale as old as time. I don't think anyone needs to be beholden to canon when they're writing fanfiction or having fun. If we did, I would have like--5 artworks on this blog hahaha. These characters are like dollies, do whatever you want. It's cool if people don't like it and I think it's cool if people do. It's just not that serious. There are ships I'm not particularly into or dynamics that I am not enchanted by, but whatever. I can just scroll or close my eyes.
TLDR; shipping in fandom doesn't need to be taken seriously at ALL. It can just be fun way for someone to play with fictional characters they like. That being said, I think it's good practice to use queer terms thoughtfully.
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drchucktingle · 6 months
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Hello Dr Tingle! I wanted to ask you about that re: your post about how all your books are serious literature (hell yeah Love is real). How do you personally deal with the whole traditional publishing institution? It attracts a whole different level of coverage and it seems that they're very quick to try and box you and like turn you into a brand. Is it stiffling? Is it freeing? Does the attention help more people understand your trot? I don't know I've never been published but since you have experience in both traditional and self publishing I'm interested in knowing how that's feeling for you
well this is a pretty complex question with lots of different trots but i will try my best to answer. lets start with WHO I AM as buckaroo name of chuck
what i create has a very strong voice and my way is pretty recognizable. while buckaroos do not know what most authors look like, i REALLY stand out in a dang crowd with a big pink bag on my head. if you see 50 random author photos and mine is mixed in and then you ask 'which photo do you remember the most?' it is probably gonna be chuck. i also have a VERY UNIQUE STORY with what i create and my artistic sensibilities, not a lot of buds are out there making trans mothman erotica along with their big five traditional publishing bestsellers (SIDENOTE preorder BURY YOUR GAYS)
now if you were going to take 'CHUCK TINGLE' to a marketing department they would FALL OVER BACKWARDS IN THEIR DANG CHAIR with excitement. it is hard to think of an author with a stronger BRAND than i already have in the sense of 'instantly recognizable trot and specific unique style'. even in answering this you can tell that i dont even TALK like other dang authors.
what i am getting at is this: i am VERY VERY LUCKY because my existence just so happens to equate to what a company would see as GOOD BRANDING. it is not intentional on my part, it is just the hand of fate i guess. im out here expressing myself in a FULL ON WAY that is PRETTY DANG STRANGE TO SOME and it just so happens to work as mainstream branding too
on paper you might think 'what the heck no way chuck tingle will fly as a mainstream trot' but honestly the main thread of this timeline can be surprising sometimes. ive been saying the key ingredient for years and i will say it again: LOVE AND SINCERITY RESONATE. when you make art with this fuel, the timeline will feel it. when you stand up tall and shout with your whole chest THIS IS MY WAY AND I LOVE MYSELF. I AM THE WORLDS GREATEST AUTHOR TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, the timeline will listen
so all that said, i do not mind the idea of myself as 'brand' because i am not CHANGING myself to create this effect. what some might see as 'brand' i just see as another part of my art. i have always believed that art is THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE not just the painting but what is outside of the frame. WHO I AM is just as important as the books i write, and interacting with my way is a whole MULTIMEDIA experience that INCLUDES YOU TOO. it is the feeling when your friend shows you your first tingler cover, or the feeling when you realize that i am not playing a character. this is ALL a part of the tingleverse and it is all a part of my honest raw expression as a queer and neurodivergent buckaroo.
YOU ARE PART OF THIS ART TOO
it is my nature of have a PUNK ROCK trot. always has been. but to me that does not mean just angrily going against everything for the sake of going against everything. for me, this punk rock trot means fighting to EXPRESS MYSELF IN THE MOST HONEST AND PURE FORM POSSIBLE and to create the art that i want to make without any boundaries
somehow i have threaded the needle in this really interesting once-in-a-dang-lifetime kind of way. my pure punk rock self as an OUTERSIDER ARTIST just so happens to resonate with this larger system of brand and traditional publishing and popular culture. i COULD reject this, but rejecting it would be LESS HONEST.
this is just who i am. i LIKE pop culture. i LIKE joy. i LIKE dressing in all pink and wearing my custom suits. I LIKE PROVING LOVE IS REAL WHAT THE HECK ELSE EVEN IS THERE? i love being a queer outsider artist and using my small voice to shout at the big bad devils and i like that every time i shout a few more of you buckaroos join the chorus and together we are just getting louder and louder and louder and WHO KNOWS what comes next for us all trotting together.
when i post something like 'WHAT A GREAT DAY TO PROVE LOVE' it is not me sitting here in a bad mood thinkin 'well i gotta make todays post to keep up with my brand'. i am ACTUALLY FEELING THAT FEELING and i actually believe it with every fiber of my being. honestly, half the time i post about the beauty of this timeline i am probably over here literally crying tears of joy (chuck is an emotional bud i get riled over the joy of existence A LOT)
and heres the best part of this trot: because i really have this punk rock way it makes me very powerful. others can pretend not to care about success and brand and all that but I REALLY DO NO CARE. i would write tinglers whether buds were reading them or not, this is just my natural state, and that makes me incredibly strong. if some big corporation says 'YOU MUST DO THIS' and i dont want to do it i just say 'no thanks'. it is not some big debate about my career or anything like that because I REALLY DO NOT CARE IN THE SLIGHTEST. i care about the art
because of this, my relationship with my GIANT TRADITIONAL PUBLISHING MACHINE is great. we trot like equals and we get along really well. i tell them exactly what i want to do and they let me do it. i really do not have to answer to anyone and they deserve a huge amount of credit for respecting me in this way.
and heres the thing, THEY ALSO HAVE SOME GREAT IDEAS
SPECIFICALLY my imprint of NIGHTFIRE is very dang cool. yes, they are the head of a giant hydra of a BIG FIVE PUBLISHER, but nightfire is SO DANG ART-FOCUSED
there is no right or wrong way to be an artist, and my path is not the only one, but i can tell you what WORKS FOR ME. this is the advice i would give myself, and buckaroos can take it or leave it
here it is: never beg the big book publisher, or record label, or movie studio to pay attention to you
do not let it become a lotto ticket in your brain. do not think that you are some weak little creature and maybe if you trot just right they will scoop you up and take care of you. do not go to their door begging to be let in
LET THEM COME TO YOUR DOOR
create something so incredible and beautiful and honest and powerful and unique and important that they would be foolish to miss out. create a community or a system or a timeline or a world of imagination that thrives on its own and THEY SHOULD BE SO LUCKY TO BE A PART OF IT
then when you sit down at that board meeting it is not 'please brand me, ill do whatever you want'. instead, it is 'lets make a deal and see how much love we can prove together.'
now lets trot buckaroos
948 notes · View notes
strongheartneteyam · 9 months
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A New Beginning.
Pairing: Neteyam Sully x female!human!reader/female!avatar!reader
cw: lots of fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, slightly sexual language, kissing, hugging, tsaheylu is mentioned, TRIGGER WARNING for brief talk of death (of Reader's human body), Jake and Neytiri being the best in-laws ever
@anika-rose-walker Here's your request after ages lol I'm so sorry, boo 😅
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I changed the plot from what you asked a little bit (Neteyam and Reader are already together, instead of confessing to each other throughout the story) bc I had already written the beginning of it when I went back and read the rest of your request lol I hope you don't mind. I love you sm and I hope you like it, my lovely Kayla 💕
PS: in this story, going through a transference of consciousness from a human body to an Avatar is not as dangerous as it used to be because it has been done many times before. I have no idea if it makes sense but pls just go with it for the sake of it being easier to write 🥲 my wrist hurts so bad 
na'vi words: tsaheylu (neural bond that the na'vi make with their mate), yawne (beloved), yawntu (loved one), paskalin (sweet berry), muntxate (female mate), muntxatan (male mate), oeyä (my, mine), sevin (pretty), tawtute (human)
Not proofread. Sorry if some parts are a bit off but I can't fix it rn lol
༉‧₊.
The suns of Pandora were shining bright in the sky that day but nothing was brighter than your smile. You were overcome with happiness as what you had been anticipating for so long was finally gonna happen: you were getting your own Avatar, a body that would let you experience Pandora without that damn oxygen mask that held you back, not letting you breathe the fresh air and worse, not letting you kiss your na'vi boyfriend Neteyam unless you two were inside the lab. You were the daughter of one of the best scientists of the laboratory so you always spent a lot of your time there, but Neteyam was a busy young man and he couldn't visit you at the lab everyday which sucked. You were so addicted to him that spending even a single day without feeling his plump blue lips on yours, his soft and wet tongue lapping and sucking on your tongue felt like a kick in the stomach. You truly felt lovesick whenever it happened. Talk about a strong love and being needy for someone.
You were walking through the Omatikaya mainland, where all the people's huts were, and looking for your boyfriend. You hadn't told him you were gonna get an Avatar. You wanted it to be a surprise. Your brain could not comprehend that you would finally be able to make tsaheylu with Neteyam. Tsaheylu, man! Imagining being able to feel his affection for you through the bond, his need and desire, feel the pleasure he was feeling as the two of you mate… that felt otherworldly and so incredibly exciting. It's a connection beyond what your human brain could comprehend, honestly. Only your na'vi brain would be able to fully understand it.
Neteyam ended up finding you before you could find him. There was a sea of tall blue aliens around.
“Sevin tawtute!” He called out to you loudly, his voice excited 
When your ears heard that beautiful voice and your eyes saw his large figure, you ran to his arms and held him tight, your head only reaching his waist, so much taller he was than your human frame. You wondered the height difference you two would have once you were Dreamwalking.
“Oooh! I'm glad you're this happy to see me, muntxate!” Neteyam put his big hands on your head and pet your hair softly.
“Teyam, I got something wonderful to tell you!” You looked at him, as happy as a kid who just got a gift they'd been waiting for ages to get
Neteyam got down on his knees to cut your height difference almost in half.
“What is it?” He smiled, his fangs charmingly touching his lower lip
“My father just told me earlier today that my Avatar is ready.” Your eyes shone like stars in a dark night sky 
“Your what?!” His striped blue face betrayed his surprise
Neteyam's heart started beating fast. Was his yawne truly telling you what he thought she was?
“Are you serious, princess? Why didn't you tell me about it? My Eywa…” he chuckled, still incredulous 
“I wanted it to be a surprise! I wanted to see this beautiful surprised look on your face, muntxatan.” You look so cute. I love you so much.” Your eyes started to water
Neteyam smiled even wider. He took your oxygen mask off and quickly used both his large hands to grab your face and crushed his lips against yours, before putting it back on again.
❦︎
You opened your eyes and your vision seemed to be better as you tried to get used to the bright white artificial lights of the Avatar first testing room in the lab.
“How are you feeling, (y/n)?” Your hearing was surely much sharper as you heard those words coming from a nurse's lips in a much louder volume than you would in your human body. 
You moved your fingers and raised your hands up next to your face so you could look at them. Your fingers were blue and your wrist had some bioluminescent freckles on it. God, your skin looked much more beautiful now than it did in your human body. You were afraid you were already liking this body much more than your original one.
Your focus was so much on your new experience in your Avatar that you forgot to answer Julia's - the nurse - question.
“Can you hear me, (y/n)?” You got out of your trance and finally looked at her 
“Yes. Yes, I can! Really well, by the way.” You smiled at her. Your fangs touching your lip was a new sensation, a really cool one.
After the scientists and nurses ran some tests with you on your new Avatar, you finally were able to change from your hospital like clothes and went out of that cold room wearing some dark jeans shorts and a simple white sleeveless shirt made of a cotton like material.
You saw Neteyam sitting in one of the brown sofas in the next room. His beautiful face looked tense.
All his tension faded away as soon as he saw you. His pretty yellow eyes shone as he took your appearance in. Neteyam didn't think he could ever fall even deeper in love with you but that had just happened.
“Oeyä muntxate… you look breathtaking. Oeyä sevin yawne…” he walked slowly towards you, still enchanted by the sight of your Avatar body
Neteyam held you by your waist, bring you close to him and gave you the most tender of kisses. You kissed him back, your lips almost trembling with happiness and affection. Neteyam tasted your mouth, his tongue licking not only your tongue but your fangs too, exploring your new na'vi body. He loved how similar you were to him now just as much as he loved the differences between the both of you when you were in your human form.
❦︎
Some weeks passed and you had never been more happy. A short period of time lived being able to Dreamwalk and kiss Neteyam in the woods, on the Sully's hut and in any other place you wished to brought you much more joy than all the years you lived before.
You and Neteyam were standing in front of the lab. You two were about to say goodbye and you would wake up in your human body. But there was a feeling inside of you that you had been haunted by for some time now and it was getting harder and harder to fight it. You finally spilled it out.
“I think I wanna leave my human life behind and become one of the people. If they will have me. If you will have me…” somehow you felt insecure, as if you forgot how happy Neteyam got whenever you were by his side
Surprise was all over his face.
“Are you sure of what you're saying?”
“Yes, I am. I've never been more sure of anything in my life. I know it seems sudden… I'm tired of being human… I'd much rather be your mate and learn archery, learn to cook na'vi recipes, worship Eywa, participate in the sacred rituals, run free in the woods instead of worrying about human social rules, live among artificial lights, eat junk food - don't get me wrong, you know I love some good hamburgers” Neteyam laughed at your remark “but fresh hunted meat, seasoned with herbs and wild spices tastes much better. Also…” You looked into his large feline eyes “I wanna spend more time with you, I wanna live in our own hut… I wanna be always by your side, my Teyam. I hope you don't find me too needy.”
“Of course not, yawntu. The more you need me, the better ‘cause I need you too. So much.”
He stole a happy smile from you with those words.
“And, yawne… How could you ever doubt if I will have you be na'vi and always be with me, live in our own hut? Darling, that's all I've ever wanted. Only Eywa knows how many nights I've talked to her, wishing that it could happen one day.” His voice was full of heartfelt truth
You breathed out, relieved.
“We can talk to my dad about it. He's been through it himself before, I'm sure he can be of great help.”
You nodded and smiled “Okay.”
❦︎
After Neteyam took you to talk to the Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya tribe, his dad Jake, his tired face lit up and he smiled, showing no teeth or fangs at first.
“You sure of it, kid? It's a big deal. Your human body is gonna die and that can be really traumatizing to your head."
“I know, Mr Sully. I've thought about that. I can deal with it if it means getting to live as one of the people forever.” You said sternly 
“You're also gonna make a big commitment by becoming na'vi. You're gonna have to learn to use weapons, to hunt, to be fearless. You're gonna have to prove yourself worthy and go through your Ikinimaya before being truly considered one of the people. Are you up for it?” He looked like a mix of a father giving some life lessons to his kids, like a military chief of some kind and like a fierce leader. All three were indeed a part of him.
“Yes. I will do my best to prove myself worthy of becoming na'vi.”
Neteyam watched the two of you, some tension inside of him, as he felt like maybe his father was being too harsh on you, but he also knew he was doing what he had to as the Olo'eyktan and as someone who had once made the same decision you were making now and knew very well what he was talking about.
“Then you have all my support!” Jake finally smiled wide and opened his arms towards you “give me a hug, kid.”
You gladly walked until you got to where he was squatting - not that far from where you were sitting cross legged before - and hugged your father-in-law.
Neteyam smiled too.
“Thank you, Dad.”
When it came the time to talk to Neytiri, things went smoother than you had imagined. It seemed like a dream, in all honesty.
“You do whatever your heart tells you to do, paskalin.” Neytiri smiled at you “I believe Eywa herself chooses every human who decides to become one of the people. How could you say “no” to a request coming from the Great Mother?”
Your brain could not come up with words to describe how happy and relieved those words coming from your mother-in-law made you.
❦︎
Talking to your dad broke your heart a little. Your mother had died and you were his only family now.
“I just don't wanna lose my little girl.” Your dad was now sniffing. You felt bad as you never saw him cry.
“I'm not leaving you, Dad! I'm gonna visit you all the time! You're always gonna be my Dad. And you can always visit me when you have some free time, too.” You tried to comfort him by holding his hand as the both of you sit in your bed, in your bedroom
“I know. It's just not gonna be the same. And I'm gonna miss your beautiful human body. I'm gonna miss the girl I've raised since she was a little child.” You felt a stab in your heart. You honestly had not thought how much of a shock it would be to your dad to see your human body die. You felt a little selfish.
“She's still gonna be here.” You touched the place where your heart was, inside your chest “My soul will not change. I'm still gonna be me.” You looked into his eyes, trying to convince him of that
“I know. I just want you to be happy and if that's how you're gonna find your true happiness, I'd never try to be on your away.”
“Thank you, dad. I love you.” You hugged him and he felt a little better
You eventually broke the hug.
“I want you to come to my transferring of consciousness ceremony. Can you try and find some time on your busy scientist schedule to come and see your daughter wake up in her new body?”
“I wouldn't miss it for the world!” He gave you a supportive smile
The next step would be your transferring of consciousness ceremony. Mo'at seemed utterly happy to perform it. She wasn't that affectionate but you could read her feelings in her big amber eyes.
That night you slept in peace, knowing that the next time you would go to sleep again, you would be in your then permanent na'vi body and inside Neteyam's arms, your mate, the love of your life, probably making tsaheylu, as connected as you two could ever be. As one.
Taglist:
@criticallybella
@yeosxxx
764 notes · View notes
calisources · 6 months
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𝐄𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐂, 𝐒𝐄𝐗𝐔𝐀𝐋, 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒.
All sentences have been taken from different media to be compiled into a list. This is not a meme for minors, the content here goes from mild to highly sexual, topics like dominance, submissive, bondage,praise kink and breeding are all present so discretion is key. Change names, pronouns, locations as you see fit.
You are perfect. And now you wear my mark, your ass is mine.
Tie me up, please…
Kiss me hot,heavy,wet & angry with that attitude like you do when your mouth yells it hates me but your tongue screams it can’t wait for me.
Let me undress your body, caress your skin and wetly massage your mind back into making love to me again.
They wanted her. They all loved her. And they wanted to keep her.
A little vanilla never hurt anybody.
If you have any sense you’ll stay away from him.
Touch me, like this, like a good girl.
That’s it, use your tongue. 
I'd planned to have you on your bed the first time, but maybe I should take you here, by the mirror, so you can see how splendid we are together.
I’m not going to deny that I want to fuck you. I cannot do anything else, But I will say that I have plans for you if you say yes.
I’ll fuck you so good, for so long that the only thing you’ll crave is my hands on your skin, my cock deep in your pussy.
I want a second serving of you. I’m hard just thinking of your perfect breasts and hard nipples.
As much as I appreciate that, right now you’re all I want to eat.
Now will you please sit on my face already?
You are corrupting me, Theo.
But you like being corrupted, don't you, sweet girl?
The destruction of something beautiful can appear so entertaining.
If women were totally satisfied with their sexual and lovemaking experiences, women would welcome the lovemaking experience as much as men.
I want to learn from you. Teach me what you know.
Once I make you mine, you will be mine forever. I will call you and you will come, in more ways than one.
What have I taught you? Show me, sweet girl.
Use your thighs, ride like it’s your last day on this earth.
I been aching to be inside you since we met, you devil woman.
Hands braced against the wall, and open your legs.
You tasted sweet, like oranges, liquid sunshine in my mouth.
I need you. Every pore of my being is begging. This is what we do.
The things I want from you, darlin’, will give you nightmares, ones like you’ve never had before.
If you could read my mind, I’m pretty sure you’d either be traumatized, sexually aroused or both.
The nicer you treat her outside the bedroom, the naughtier it will get inside the bedroom.
Sex is a part of nature. I go along with nature.
That’s it. You can take a lot more, don’t you? Hold on to me.
If you behave, I’ll let your hands go and touch me.
I love your skinny legs, and what's between them.
 I don't want words, but inarticulate cries.
All you have to do is beg, and I will give you what you want.
I want you splayed out on the table like my own personal feast.
I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair. Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets.
You make the sweetest little noises. But I need you to be louder, let everyone know.
It's like an itch, isn't it? You can feel it in your throat. You want to scream for me.
Every time you move tomorrow, I want you to be reminded that I've been here. Only me. You are mine.
I felt like an animal, and animals don't know sin, do they?
And ye whimper under me, and struggle as though you wanted to get away, and I know it's only that you're struggling to come closer, and I'm fighting the same fight.
I can help you with that.
Forgetting him. Moving on. I’m okay with being your rebound. I’ve already said that I want you.
You’ll give yourself to me? Let me take control? Let me send you over the edge of ecstasy time and again until you awaken?
Possess. Have. Hold. Enjoy. Control. Dominate. Pick your verb, Ms. Fairchild. I intend to explore so very many of them.
I feel claimed.
You’re so primed. I can feel that hot little pussy clenching around me every time I move a muscle or say a word.
Yeah, arch your back so I can look at you going nice and tight around my fingers.
Pet, I give you permission to be as vocal as you wish, because I am going to blow your mind in a few minutes and I want to hear how much you enjoy the ride.
If you want me to touch you, all you have to do is ask. It would be my pleasure -  and yours.
Watch me make love to you.
I'd like to bite that lip.
I want you sore, baby.
I cannot let you burn me up, nor can I resist you.
There is no room in my body for anything but you.
Eat me, drink me; thirsty, cankered, just take me as I am.
I live for sex. I celebrate it, and relish the electricity of it, with every fibre of my being.
I’m not wearing anything underneath. Want to see?
You will be staying here until I’ve deemed it safe for you to go back to your life. Do you understand me?
Dominate you? Yes. Master you? yes. Make you yield to what you want, make you surrender to who you truly are? Yes.
Why don’t you scream my name? Let every other man and woman who you belong to.
I don’t want to think, I just want to feel.
I taught you everything you know. Every man after me is just a shadow of what I did to you.
I knew you could be a good girl.
You were fucking made for me.
God is not gonna save you from me, baby.
My mouth wants you, I want to feel you in my mouth, way down in my mouth.
I am moist between the legs.
I came three times. During sex. 
Do you know all the ways a Lady can be seduced? The things I could teach you?
You stay right where daddy puts you, baby girl.
Wait until you taste her. She is fucking delicious.
Lick my fingers and feel how wet you are.
Are there big, bad monsters in the woods who want to eat me up?
Right there, don’t stop. I can feel it. 
Please come in me, I don’t care, I want to feel you.
Where do you want it, baby girl? Your cunt, your mouth or your neck?
Close your eyes and relax. One kiss. I don’t bite.
Seriously? In the morning, again? 
You said to rest but I can feel you hard against my back. 
You can do all the rest sweet, let me take care of you.
I want you to fuck me, Chris.
A little playful banter never hurt — or did it?
One should always explore something, before one goes in deeper.
Come here and undress me.
How am I supposed to do my job when all I can think about is getting back to you?
Someone could walk in on us. 
Better be good and come fast, then. Or everyone will see you begging for more.
I can imagine my hands getting your fucking clothes off right now.
Do not shy away from the sensations I create, Cherry Blossom. Take pride in them, as I do.
Am I doing it good, baby? Just like you taught me? 
Tell me I’m a good girl. Your only girl. 
When I come, I come for you. Because of you and your mouth, hands, and insatiable little cunt.
My tongue, my fingers, my cum inside you. Just you and me, Eva. Intimate and raw.
How many have been with you ever since? Or no one compared? Tell me.
Show me then. I demand that you show me. That’s an order.
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archiveikemen · 28 days
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"Come Play With Us, Miss Fairytale Keeper" Story Event: Chapter 2
Alfons Sylvatica VS Ring Schwartz
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This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection; expect mistakes, grammatical errors, and some creative liberties. All original content and media used belongs to Cybird. Please support the game by buying their stories and playing their games. Reblogs appreciated.
Read this before interacting
Alfons: Kate, say “ahh”.
Kate: Mm… this grape is delicious!
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Ring: … What’s this you’ve been doing since just now? 
Alfons: It’s necessary to blend in if we want to gather information on our target.
Alfons: For that, I’m playing the role of a lovesick man trying to seduce Kate. 
Ring: Aren’t you just feeding her grapes?
Alfons: My, my… you won’t be saying that for long. 
Alfons: My fingers are dirty now… you’ll clean them for me, right, Kate? 
Kate: eh… 
The instant I parted my lips and let out a small confused sound, Alfons pushed his fingers into my mouth.
He moved his fingers in and out, tracing my tongue and rubbing the roof of my mouth. 
Kate: Nn…a… mmph…!
Alfons: Yes, yes, just like that… you’re so cute, sucking and licking so eagerly. 
Alfons: … Makes me want to put something other than my fingers into that little mouth of yours and make you moan. 
Kate: Nn~~!
Alfons: Even if you resist, right now you’ll only sound like you’re making erotic noises. Fufu… 
Alfons: You see, you’ll look suspicious if you resist too much. 
Alfons: Ah, ah, you’re making such a pleased face… really, you can’t do this without me. 
Being forced to lick his fingers and having my mouth messed with made it slightly hard to breathe.
And yet… I was frustrated at myself for feeling a little bit of pleasure from it. 
Alfons: Thank you for showing me that lewd expression. 
Alfons let out a delighted laugh before pulling his fingers out of my mouth.
Kate: Please don’t do such weird things all of a sudden!
Alfons: I couldn't help it. I’m just a pitiful man approaching you desperately for your love. 
Alfons: Besides, you enjoyed it, didn’t you? 
Kate: T-that’s… 
Seeing that I couldn't deny it, Alfons smiled with satisfaction.
Alfons: Next is Ring’s turn.
Ring: … I know.
Ring nodded with a solemn look on his face and looked at me—  
Kate: Mmph…! 
Suddenly, he started vigorously wiping my mouth with his sleeve. 
(Come to think of it, my mouth was all sticky from the grape juice and saliva…) 
Feeling sorry about it, I let him continue; but I then realised how close we were.
Ring: Mm… a little more…
Whenever our eyes met, he would usually awkwardly avert his gaze or glare warily at me.
But right now, his cobalt blue eyes stared straight into mine, the intensity of his gaze taking my breath away.
(If he were to look at someone so earnestly and come this close…)
(I bet many people would fall for him.) 
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Ring: That should do it. 
Kate: T-thank you. … Sorry for being so dirty.
Ring; No, you’re not dirty. Not at all.
Ring: Actually… I’m the one who should apologise, for touching you without permission. 
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Ring: It’s just, your face after Alfons seduced you… it was too um— 
Kate: …?? 
Alfons: It was too lewd and so you’re worried that other men would see it, isn’t that right? 
Ring: … A-anyway! All that matters is that you can be at ease now. 
(He wiped my mouth to protect me… I’m glad.) 
Alfons: That was a nice move. I’d say Ring will get one point for it. 
Ring: Huh…? … I haven't seduced her, though. 
Alfons: Did you do that naturally? Impressive, as expected from someone with a lot of experience. 
Ring: Ah, yeah… t-this is nothing. 
(... Alfons and Ring are two completely different types of people.) 
Insolent and innocent — time passed as I continued being caught between their different attitudes. 
Alfons: Oh? … One of our targets has arrived.
Following Alfons’ gaze, I spotted a man delightedly helping himself to some light snacks. 
(It’s the same person I saw in the documents. He’s a doctor to the public eye, but secretly involved in trafficking illegal drugs…) 
Ring: … I don’t see his partner nearby. 
Alfons: They might have agreed to only meet right before heading to their room. They’re very cautious. 
Ring: … I’ll go spy on that man.
Alfons: So you’re trying to put a gap between you and I by taking the lead? 
Ring: Of course. I can’t stand watching Kate as you make moves on her. 
Ring: I’ll put an end to this competition quickly. 
Ring left his spot and approached the man. 
Ring: There’s something I want to ask you.
Male Doctor: Hm? If I’m not mistaken… you’re from that trio. Two men competing over one woman, right? Ahh, youth. 
Ring: Yeah. You see… I’m on the verge of losing to my rival. 
Ring: I want to choose the best private room in this mansion to gain an edge over him. 
Ring: You’re a regular here, right? Could you tell me if there’s any room you particularly like to use? 
(He went straight to the point…) 
I got nervous, but the man didn't seem to suspect a thing because of Ring’s confidence.
Male Doctor: I usually let my partner choose a room, so I’m not really sure myself. 
Ring: I see… sorry for taking up your time.
Ring returned to his spot after speaking with our target. 
Ring: … It didn't work. 
Alfons: But you did manage to gain new information. Your straightforward approach was commendable. 
Ring: … What do we do next? We haven't identified his partner.
Alfons: That’s true, however… I’ve already spotted his lady companion. 
Ring: When did you…? 
Partners don’t usually stray too far from each other at parties, but since the people here have illicit relationships, many of them act separately from their partners.
(How did he identify her out of all the women here?) 
Alfons: The reason is simple. The man from a while ago was wearing a bracelet, right?
Ring: … Was he?
Alfons: That bracelet comes from a set. If you connect the two bracelets together, they'll become a necklace.
Kate: Amazing… you even noticed that.
Alfons: I know about it because the beautiful design is highly praised. All thanks to Lord Elbie. 
Alfons: And there’s someone else in this venue wearing the same bracelet.
Ring: …! That lady hiding behind the pillar.
(She really is wearing the same bracelet!) 
Alfons: Let me quickly obtain the information we need.
Alfons left his spot, approached the woman, and… gently touched the nape of her neck. 
He used his curse’s ability to alter the woman’s perception and coaxed the location of the room out of her. 
Alfons: I’m back. Apparently, their room is named “Rose” and located on the second floor. 
Kate: That was amazing, Alfons! 
Alfons: I’m honoured to receive your praise. With that, I gain one point too and become tied with Ring.
Alfons: Now, we’re approaching the final stage of our mission.
Alfons: Kate… between Ring and myself, who will you choose as your lover?
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targaryen-dynasty · 1 year
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AEMOND TARGARYEN.
Mini-Series.
Love Me Tomorrow (aka Stay) and Love Me Now (aka Mine) -> completed (Modern AU)
"You always thought the benefits part of being friends with benefits only included sex, but with Aemond it also seemed to include cuddling and life advice. "
The Devil You Know -> hiatus (Modern AU)
"King's Landing is haunted by an ongoing feud between two rivaling biker groups, and somehow you get stuck right in the middle of it — if it wasn't for a certain blonde, who everyone warns you to stay away from. Of course, he's part of Dracarys, the rivaling biker gang, and staying away from him is a lot harder than it seems."
Object of Desire -> ongoing
"A raven from King‘s Landing has reached Runestone two moons ago, bidding for you to come to the capital though no distinct reason has been stated. The signature of your father below didn‘t give Ser Gerold any other choice than to get you ready and send you off, knowing he could not deny Daemon Targaryen. You quickly learn that the time has come for you to find a husband, however, the true object of your desire isn‘t the one your father has intended for you."
One Shots.
Depravities
"When your husband feels overwhelmed reining in the stead of the severely wounded King, it is your duty as his wife to comfort him."
Sinful Revenge (x Aegon)
"After catching Aegon with a servant girl between his legs, you found a way to put him back in his place."
A Caution for Young Girls
"Can we just ride Aemond by the hearth? Tis all. He can brat tame us, be mean, be nice..whatever honestly." Yeah, we definitely can! This is the first time you’re riding your Dragon.
In The Space Between (Modern AU) -> drabble
"You we’re happy your friend Floris got to marry her longtime boyfriend Aegon… if it wasn't for the sake of you being the plus one of her groom’s brother and also your ex boyfriend, Aemond."
Lechery
"Based on the request: "Can you write a jealosy Dom Aemond when his wife his dance and have fun with Jace at the dinner. So he put her on his knees and punish her, after that he fuck and give orgasms to show at who she belongs.""
Longing (Modern AU)
"Based on the request: "Can I please request modern Aemond x best friend reader smut? They are watching some movie or TV series together and suddenly some steamy scene happens on the screen and he notices that she is turned on by that? And he is like "if you want to experience it I can help you with it?""
And Now I See Daylight
"The pace was slow, just like it had been throughout the whole night, and despite it being unsaid, you both knew that was not what this night was about. It was about your unity, making peace with your past and embracing your future together."
Rewrite The Stars
“Aemond arrives at your betrothed‘s funeral. And after being denied your hand in marriage once, he does not come to leave without you.“
Serenity
“With Aemond’s arm around you, and his lips pressing against your temple, the fatigue you were feeling could wait for a little while, if it meant you got to indulge in those rare moments of serenity for just a little bit longer.“
Can You Stay Up All Night?
"Even after the babe had settled, you didn’t find any sleep. And while your breasts hadn’t felt too uncomfortable back then, they did now. They were heavy, hard to the touch and full of milk, desiring relief from their overstuffed state."
Pray For Me
“Trying to persuade you to declare yourself for their side in the war of succession, Aemond relies on different methods to make your façade crumble.“
Mine And Mine Only
“Aemond has gotten you pregnant six months ago, and seeing him with his infant niece during dinner with his family sparks something inside of you only he can satisfy.“
The Devil's Advocate
“Will the tormenting craving of your body for physical touch finally be stilled by the hands of none other than the man who‘s responsible for whether you‘ll live or die?“
Rumble and Sway
"After the set of your favorite punk rock band ended, you haven’t expected to bump shoulders with none other than their bassist, Aemond Targaryen. And you least expected him to usher you into a private booth after what felt like your twentieth shot of vodka."
What the Heart Desires
"Both of Helaena’s brothers have always been forbidden territory for you, the rule established by your best friend at the very beginning, and you’ve never really regarded any of them – until you’ve been all but coaxed to team up with Aemond for a round of beer pong. "
To Stoke a Flame
"There’s a moment of silence between you, and your hands clutch the handle of the pail tight enough for your knuckles to blanch from the force. It’s unnerving, and you’re torn between wanting to stay and wanting to leave. You’re afraid he’s not the man you’ve made up in your mind, that there’s just a hint of truth in the rumors that make their way around staff and court."
A Dragon to Share
"For a fortnight, you’ve been spending your nights with Aemond and Aegon. But what happens, if there’s yet another uncalled visitor joining you? Improper revelations lead to the fulfilling of a long-buried desire of yours."
Evening Delights
"Based on the prompt: “So… Do you actually like me—” “We have been together for seven years. We’re getting married next year. What the hell do you think?”"
Shadows Play on Idle Hands
"Sharing a cabin with your ex-husband as you supervise your daughter's summer camp, you didn't think that remembering the good old times would bring you closer again."
The Curse of Curiosity
"While your brother searches the library of the Dragonkeeper Elder for something new to read, you come in contact with some unlabeled fluid. You both learn that it's something meant to aid in the breeding of dragons, however, it also has a unique effect on humans. But lucky for you, your twin is there to help you through the ordeal."
Dragon Dreams
“Monthly nightmares have already plagued you way before your wedding, even though your grandfather has always addressed them as dragon dreams rather than nightmares. But you and your husband both know you’re not gifted with such abilities.“
Forbidden Temptation
"Two moons after the birth of your precious son, your moonblood has returned as severe as never before. And being the ever caring and loving husband, Aemond takes it upon himself to help you ease the pain."
Steam That Lingers
"Your mind has been a mess for the past moon's turn, and you have the man you’ve entrusted with all your secrets for all of your life to thank for that. And the last thing you expect when you walk into your bathing chambers late at night is said man sitting in the bathtub, awaiting your return. Will you give in or will your temper get the worst of you?"
The Greatest Temptation
"Keeping your boyfriend waiting for too long is always a dangerous game, and when he finally has enough, he deems it most fitting to give your audience a real show."
A Little Predicament (x Aegon II Targaryen)
"While you share little sympathy with any of the people present, you know you can’t get any closer to learning about your heritage than you are right now. Aegon and Aemond are served to you on a silver platter, and if there is one thing your grandmother has taught you, it’s that there certainly is one way to charm yourself into a man’s heart to get what you desire."
Violent Delights
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MASTERLIST NAVIGATION.
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justin-chapmanswers · 19 days
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Sorry if this is a bit rude, but how do you consider yourself as he/they or they/he? I am questioning my sexuality and gender at the moment and seeing you (idk if ur lgbt) makes me find comfort, if you can, how did you realise you were not straight and how I can find mine! :3
Oh golly uh. Let's see if I can keep this short and then bury it under other answers. <3
Labels are fun cause they're so funky and ever-changing as you learn more about yourself. So, firstly, don't stress about finding something so perfect right away and bounding yourself to it. You're still you, any way you word it.
Gender-wise I'm in a state of def preferring they but being chill enough with he. Like whateverrrrr. It's hard to get around societal norms and perceptions, so my expectations are calibrated accordingly. I of course feel that for people who feel more strongly about a specific label, it's important to fight for it to be recognized whenever you're in a safe-enough environment to do-so. But for me, the concept of pushing for a specific label or, even more-so, of seeing other people pushing others to use a specific label for me is veryyyy anxiety-inducing. I tend to avoid spotlight when possible. But at the same time, a lot of it just comes down to not wanting to be grouped/perceived gender-ly at all. I tend to use the label agender. But I'm sure a lot of people have similar experiences with different labels. I just, ya'know, wanna be me.
Gender exploration is funnnn. There's no one right way to learning about yourself. Some people know from a young age, almost inherently, some people figure things out a lot later. It's never too late. Some people learn with outfits and styles, some with looking to people/characters who they want to be perceived more-like, some with experimenting through new names/pronouns and feeling-out how being called different things makes them feel. If you have friends you feel safe around with all of this, on or offline, can't hurt to say "hey would ya mind calling me x-name or y-pronoun for a bit?" And if you don't like it, you don't need to stick with it. But really be cognizant of it feels right to you.
Then on the romantic orientation side, that's been a much longer journey haha. I was calling myself straight through middle schooler, bi for a bit in early high school, gay starting in later high school, then for a long while. Nowadays I just say queer. Labels make things easier, until they don’t haha. For me, if you imagine a scale of feminity to masculinity with like little pegs running down the line from 0 to 10, with 5 in the middle, I tend to find myself attracted to people in like the 4 to 8 range? Something like that. But even that's not perfectly consistent! There's never going to be a perfect word for everything. That's why I like queer as an umbrella term. It's also just a cute word, I don't make the rules.
Hence earlier when I mentioned that you should just feel free to keep it open and not close yourself off. Maybe nothing'll change, but what if something does? But of course, I assume you're asking from more of a place of just starting this journey. I'm trying to get my mind back to where I started with that. I think the first time the not-straight realization hit was when a friend of mine didn't show up to an event and I was all like "why am I so miserably sad that he wasn't there?" And then a lightbulb appeared over my head and out-loud I said "aw damnit." And then things have been weird and confusing ever since.
But in terms of giving advice, it's hard to not just be like "uhh idk just hang out with people that makes you feel gooey." But obviously it's more complicated than that. A decade ago, I was taking random "am I gay" tests online. But they're kinda silly cause the questions on those would ask me to fill in information about how I feel, but how am you supposed to know how I feel without the test telling me how I feel??????? So realistically, I'd advise private journaling. Just take some time, even five minutes. Start now. Write out who you are drawn to, in any sense, and how they make you feel. Especially if you're like me and have trouble self-reflecting unless I force myself to. Like. In a Tumblr post.
There's so many ways to explore. It's also nice to look at relationships in life and media and seeing if you connect to any relationship or long to fit into someone's place within a relationship. That's why representation matters, baybeeeee! But also, ya'know, talking to people goes a long way to learning about yourself. Trial 'n error let's gooooo.
And above all: you got this.
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art · 11 months
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Creator Spotlight: @66sharkteeth
66 is a comic artist and the creator of City of Blank, a WEBTOON original series. They worked in the game industry at companies such as 2K Games before entering the field of comics. They began their career in comics at Tapas, where they worked as an editor and lead typesetter, before being signed to create their own original series on WEBTOON.
Check out our interview with 66 below!
Have you ever had an art block? If so, how did you overcome it?
The short answer is yeah, I’ve definitely had one. Overall, I feel like doing a lot of style studies during that time and trying to use new brushes helps a lot. In addition, because I’m a comic artist, I feel like writer’s block is in the same field, and with that, I’m really fortunate that I have an editor that I can work with, who helps me a lot there. Whenever I am stuck at a plot point in my comic, I can always go to my editor, who helps me hammer things out.
What medium have you always been intrigued by but would never use yourself?
Animation. Of course, everyone loves animation. I went to school for game art and design and even did some animation courses, and I am just not cut out for it. I don’t enjoy the process, and I am not good at it. Animation is beautiful, and I admire people who can do it. I’d love for my work to be animated some day, I’m just not capable of being the one to do it haha.
Warm tones or cool tones?
It really depends on the scene! Especially in my comic, I really go with both of them, just depending on the moment in the comic. There was a major character death, and that scene was almost black and white. But normally, the comic is very vibrant, and people really like it, so when I switch it to a more cold tone, it makes the scene that much more impactful.
What is a recent creative project that you are proud of?
Honestly, my current comic, City of Blank, takes up 100% of my time. But recently, I did a plushie campaign where I worked with Makeship through Webtoon to design the plushies and do a little bit of marketing for them. So that’s fun and different from what I normally do!
When planning a comic or a story, what do you do first, character design or character outline?
Normally, I have a design, and I fall in love with the character design, and then I find a role for them. That’s how a lot of my characters have started. Also, that’s how I’ve been tackling new projects that I want to work on after City of Blank. I just came up with a character, and I’m trying to make a story around them.
What is a convention experience that has stuck with you?
Meeting readers and realizing how much my work means to some of them. Some of them have started their own comics, having been inspired by mine. Learning that I’m part of the reason they started their own comic journey, the same way I looked to other inspiring comic artists to start mine—it means the world that I’m in that position now.
Top tips on setting up an Artist Alley booth?
Let’s see…bright, sparkly colors! I think just trying to make sure that the booth is eye-catching. I ended up making a big shiny banner for New York Comic Con, and I know many people stopped by because it caught their eye and they’re curious about what it is. I know a lot of people are selling merchandise of popular media. Even just a banner of your brand to get them curious about who you are and maybe interested in seeing what you make and taking a business card so they can look you up later. It’s better than someone just buying a pin and forgetting you exist. Lastly, put out a tip jar. You never know just how generous your fans are feeling.
Who on Tumblr inspires you and why?
I’m mostly involved in the webtoon sphere! I am definitely inspired by my fellow Webtoon creators, @lark-wren, who created the series Woven. I love their work and seeing them interact with their readers on Tumblr. Same with fellow Webtoon creators, @miranda-mundt-art and @astrobleme-enterprises, who created Lovebot.
Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing, 66! Be sure to check out their Tumblr blog over at @66sharkteeth and follow their webcomic, City of Blank, over at WEBTOON.
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burquillos · 2 months
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I’d love to hear your thoughts on the final MHA chapter because the internet seems to be very divided
I waited till MHA officially ended! Long post ahead!! People being divided on the ending makes sense. Different people come to watch shows and read comics for very different reasons and with very different expectations for an ending in mind. Especially for a series like MHA which is a battle manga that seeks to subvert shonen genre tropes.
I think part of the reason why people are so divided on it right now is because of leak culture and reaction culture. People have to remember that comic books and manga are a storytelling medium. The author actually thinks about the arrangement of the panels, what’s in the panels, and how the combination of these things can form a narrative. Reading it from twitter thread/discords from people in a rush to translate to get the information to you as fast as possible is NOT the intended way to experience the story.
The “leak format” kind of encourages people to put too much focus on certain panels and roughly translated text that would otherwise feel very different when you are reading the story through the intended medium, and when you pair that with the highly reactive way people ‘consume content’ nowadays, the result is a snowball of very volatile emotions being thrown around without a moment for people to breathe, think, and wonder for themselves “Why did the author write it like this? Was there something I missed? How does this re-contextualize story? Have I actually missed the point this whole time?” etc.
That being said, I sort of have a philosophical way of approaching MHA?? When I got back to it again, I was hyper-critical of it especially because I just came back from reading One Piece (and the writing styles and messages are VERY different). I slowly learned to judge the writing for what it is rather than keep comparing it to other series and I learned it was more enjoyable to experience the story like that.
The ending is a very hard pill to swallow for a lot of people which is understandable, but it didn’t come out of nowhere. I mean, just look at the ending lines of "Do Not Be Defeated by Rain", the poem that inspired Deku’s character:
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I am also a stubbornly optimistic person, and my number one rule is never to engage with anything in bad faith. I CHOOSE to see hope through the margins and the final chapter being so open to potential encourages that thinking of mine.
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So even though I think there are some things that could be handled better (the villains) and storylines I WISH were explored (OFA vestiges my beloved) there’s no reason why it couldn’t be fixed.
There is this openness to it that leaves so much room for hope and imagination that I can’t truly be mad at it.
I might find MHA lacking as an entertainment piece, but I will defend it to the end as an artistic piece.
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Horikoshi has said before that he doesn’t care if his manga is popular or not, MHA is basically a culmination of the stuff he enjoys, and I KNOW drawing whatever the hell you want despite knowing not everyone will like it takes a lot of guts and it’s what makes MHA so human.
All the traces of him are in there, flaws and everything, so you can endlessly turn it around, flip back and forth and there will be always something new to unpack, learn, and realize and the thought of what could've been will always haunt people (just like Star Wars, a series he also likes kajdbaldnlk)
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hotdaemondtargaryen · 2 months
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TOM GLYNN-CARNEY INTERVIEWED BY VANITY FAIR MAGAZINE.
KING AEGON COULD BE A VERY ONE-NOTE VILLAIN CHARACTER, BUT IN YOUR HANDS IS NOT. HOW DID YOU APPROACH CALIBRATING AEGON?
"I think anybody who has the darker side to them as the more prominent side — the side that people see first —there’s always a reason for that."
"I dug into that and found a lot of his boyish vulnerability, insecurities, and self-hatred — stuff that he’d been drip-fed his entire life."
"He wasn’t even a spare, you know? He was just completely ignored."
"He was invisible to most people, which is why he behaved in such a way — to numb himself."
But also to say: "Hey, I’m here as well."
"Any attention was good attention for Aegon."
"I find him less of a villain and more of a tragic case."
CAN YOU TALK A LITTLE BIT ABOUT WHY AEGON DECIDED TO FLY TO ROOK'S REST AT ALL?
"It was that moment — well, it’s an accumulation of moments — but that one in particular where Alicent says, 'Do exactly what is required of you: nothing'."
"That was the final dagger in the heart."
"A real cold reminder that he really is seen as being useless."
"A pawn for Alicent and Otto [Rhys Ifans] to use as a puppet."
"But at the end of the day, the law of the land states that he’s the monarch."
"He’s the king."
"He’s the person to call the shots."
"And no one’s gonna fucking stop him from getting on that dragon if he wants to."
"So he got absolutely obliterated drunk and thought, I’m gonna show them."
WHAT WAS YOUR EXPERIENCE LIKE SHOOTING THE BIG DRAGON FIGHT SCENE?
"Cool, man."
"It’s kind of a little boy’s dream."
"It’s just something that you think of when you’re a child as being the coolest thing in the world."
"And it really was."
"They basically build a screen around you so you know where to look: what’s expected, what’s coming at you, what’s leaving you."
"Your entire perspective is quite clear."
"And then amongst that, you’re clad in all this armor that has been expertly crafted by some amazing workmanship."
"But then again, you’re crouched over this big saddle, strapped in, feeling like you can’t move."
"That crane has really got a lot of work to do to make it look like you’re moving."
AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SEASON, AEGON SAYS THAT AEMOND IS HIS CLOSEST CONFIDANT, AND BY EPISODE FOUR, AEMOND HAS BASICALLY TRIED TO KILL HIM. WHERE DO THEY STAND NOW? AND WHAT'S YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH EWAN MITCHELL, WHO PLAYS AEMOND?
"Oh, Aegon and Aemond’s relationship is very different to Tom and Ewan’s relationship."
"Let’s put that out there." [laughs]
"Look, that is sibling rivalry on a very intense scale, isn’t it? It’s the flip of the switch that can happen when somebody feels pushed out or somebody feels like there’s been injustice."
"I always felt like Aemond saw himself being in that position of power and dealing with it better than Aegon would deal with it."
"But then again, his birth certificate states otherwise."
"It was bound to happen at some point, wasn’t it?"
WAS THERE A PARTICULAR SCENE THAT YOU FELT EXTRA CHALLENGED BY OR INVIGORATED BY?
"He’s never in the same frame of mind twice in one day."
"He’s all over the place."
"Keeping up with his erratic mood swings was the hard part, and was this thing that I was having to stay really focused on."
"There wasn’t particularly one scene that I thought, Oh God, not this one, because all of them are challenging in different ways."
"Even the ones where he’s still and more focused are difficult, because you’ve got that sort of inner Aegon rhythm that is rapid."
"It’s very different to mine."
"It’s maintaining that, but still keeping the tension of the scene."
"I relished the opportunity to play someone with such range and creative potential from an acting point of view."
OLIVIA COOKE, WHO PLAYS ALICENT, HAS NOTED THAT YOU TWO ARE NOT VERY FAR APART IN AGE AT ALL, AND YET ARE PLAYING MOTHER AND SON. HOW DID YOU GUYS WORK TOGETHER TO CREATE THAT FILIAL DYNAMIC?
"Every scene that I’ve had with Olivia, there is never a moment that isn’t filled."
"Everything is just so complex and deeply entrenched in her."
"She means everything she says."
"It’s a rare skill to have."
"As an actor, she has that in truckloads."
"It’s a gift to be able to work with her, to play her son."
"Yeah, [it’s] hilarious."
"She’s only a year older than me."
"I think we manage it because we get on so well."
"We’re pals as well, you know."
"I love Olivia to bits."
"Trust her wholeheartedly."
"We have a laugh. We don’t take it too seriously."
"We have common ground on that."
"But then in the moments where the work is happening, it’s all we care about."
"We care immensely."
"It’s one of those things where in the downtime, after we wrap, we can go for a drink."
"We can have a laugh."
"We connect on a personal level as well as a professional level."
"I think that’s what sort of breeds a healthy and believable performance thing relationship-wise."
THERE'S AN AMUSING SCENE WHERE AEGON IS SITTING AROUND WITH THE LADS AND TALKING ABOUT WHAT HIS SOBRIQUET SHOULD BE. SHOULD HE BE 'AEGON THE BRAVE,' 'AEGON THE WHATEVER,' ETC. WHAT DO YOU THINK HE SHOULD BE CALLED?
"Aegon Toast, probably."
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