#so i agreed and sent her a photo of my planned colour scheme and she was delighted because there’s so many shades of blue

[fingertipsmp3]

So I got commissioned yesterday and I was kind of nervous because I haven’t crocheted in a long time and have never made anything for this person before, but she is apparently beside herself with happiness over the colours I picked & the fact that I agreed to the commission, so I think this is going to go well

[shittylongcatposts]

Jumin week 2020 Day 3 (Video Games) @juminweek2019

The group chat was noisy again. Every now and then a message pinged on her phone, distracting her from working on the invitations for the next party. But there it was, another ping. And another. The young girl sighed and opened the messenger too, everybody was online and the chat was busy discussing Zen’s new role and Jaehee’s long wished vacation, which she chose to spend on Jumin’s island - alone. Nothing majorly important, Mc said a quick hello and asked how every member was doing and closed the app again. 

Suddenly she got a call from Jumin. Mc panicked a little bit and nearly let her phone fall out of her hands. Jumin Han was calling her. B-But why now? Is there something he wanted to tell her? She really wanted to pick up, but…. how was she supposed to greet him? Her fingers finally found the green button and she answered with an embarrassed “Hiya!” 

wow she could have said so many cool things but all she could come up with was hiya….

“Hello Mc, I’m glad to hear your voice. There’s something I wanted to ask you, but let me be cliche first: How was your day?”, she tried to imagine how he looked liked right now. It was pretty late already so probably he just got home, maybe he was wearing his shirt a little bit opened up, with a loose tie around his neck. The mere thought of it made her heart skip a beat. 

“Mc?” Jumin asked, with concern in his voice, “Is something the matter, you seem rather distracted today.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I’m currently working on the invitations and did some paper work today too.” she sighed while looking at the clock. It was so late already. When did it get so dark? 

“I’m glad that you are so reliable with your work as party coordinator, Mc, I’m so proud of you.” she could hear his smile through the speaker of her phone and squeaked. The wonderful Jumin Han was proud of her????OMG!!!

“What was that sound, have you seen a bug? Did something happen to you?” he asked 

“No, no I’m fine. It’s nothing, I’m sorry, I just saw a cute cat photo.” she answered and sighed. Phew. Hopefully he won’t find out about your crush on the CEO. 

“Ah, I’m glad then. Now here’s my question… I wanted to ask you if you could help me with something.” 

“Sure go ahead.” Mc nodded even though he could not see it. 

“Thanks, a business partner sent me a switch some time ago and… Oh wait you that already, because we played Mario cart at the after party last time, right?”

Mc laughed as she remembered that night. It was so much fun gaming with them together, seeing them all laughing and having a good time. She also remembered Jumin driving into the direction, driving through banana peels and falling off the track from time to time. Sometimes when he focused on driving Jumin would stick his tongue out. But that only happened after he had a couple of wine glasses.

Mc blushed and was thankful that Jumin couldn’t see her right now. 

“yeah I remember.”

“I bought animal crossing some days ago and was wondering if you got the game too?”

“I do. Wanna visit me?” she asked now with a cheesy grin on her face. That was quite the surprise. 

“Can we do it now? I think I really need some help. I bought some turnips last week and now the prices have fallen down. May I visit your island?” he chuckled, maybe he was thinking it was ridiculous. But it just made him more adorable. 

“Of course you can, I am starting the game right now and boy, do I have a surprise to show you! Oh and Jumin?” she tilted her head, put her bangs behind her ear. “Can you wear a suit please?”

“I always wear one.” he laughed. 

“I mean in game.” 

“Like I said, I always wear one.” he repeated himself. How cute. 

The both of them spoke a bit more until she was ready and opened the gates of her airport, immediately getting the notification that someone was coming. When she saw him finally setting foot on her island, her smile got even brighter. Jumin opened the map and gasped. Her whole island was cat themed. Every resident on it a cat, and there was a giant lake in the shape of a cat’s head on the map too. 

When she heard his soft laughter she couldn’t help but laugh too. 

“You like it?” she grinned. 

“I love it! This is such a great idea, Mc! Your island looks amazing. I have to take notes I guess. I didn’t know you could do all these things.” He talked on and on as she showed Jumin everything.

Last but not least Mc guided him to her house. He walked inside and soon after she heard another soft chuckle from the other side of the phone.

“Y...you.. You really have a great taste Mc, now I think I have to sell my turnips! It’s super late, and I don’t want to bother you anymore.” He quickly said, running into the direction of Nook's cranny. He didn’t say another word.

What did just happen? she wondered and went inside her home, and in her “bedroom” she found the reason for it. There were two Photos of Jumin hanging on the wall, and another picture in between them saying the words: “my love”. 

Mc slapped her forehead and didn’t know whether she should laugh or cry. How could she have forgotten about this?!

“Jumin?” she asked nervously. 

“hmm?” his voice sounded deeper than before.

“I’m sorry… I.. uhmm…” Mc stuttered, being unable to find the right words. 

“Was this the surprise you wanted to show me?” the young man asked, there was no emotion in his voice.

“No,... my god it’s so embarrassing. But I think I’ve got to tell you either way, now that you saw it.” her hand rubbed over her forehead, and she took a small sip from her glass of water before speaking up again. 

But Jumin cut her of: “Look, I really like you too, but that’s not something I’d like to discuss over the phone or through animal crossing. Would you like to drink a cup of tea or coffee with me tomorrow?” 

Mc nodded, and agreed to his plan, and they both agreed on never speaking about this little incident again. After he sold his turnips, they sat down on a bench together, playing with their emotes. Only then Jumin commented how cute Mc’s character actually looked like. The colour scheme reminded him of something. Then it struck him like lightning: It was Elizabeth the 3rd. She laughed when he told her and explained to him that this was the actual surprise. They talked for nearly another hour, enjoying each other's company and gazed at the night sky together. “You are really something special Mc, thank you for brightening up my day, I’ll pick you up at 3pm tomorrow. Have a good night then, my dear.” Jumin said with the softest voice the young girl ever heard of him.

When she finally went to bed, Mc still felt the blush on her cheeks, and she couldn't stop smiling. Things went a little bit different... but she was about to go on a date with Jumin. The man of her dreams.  What a day this has been.

[kriscme]

One Life To Live

Chapter 21 “” Exploring the Appalachian Trail”, “How to Hike the Appalachian Trail,” “Appalachian Trail Guide”, “Lost on the Appalachian Trail.”” Johanna looks up from the pile of books she’s rifling through.  “Why would he want that one? Isn’t the idea not to get lost?” she asks, shaking her head.   “Oh wait, this one really takes the cake. “How to Shit in the Woods.”  Why would you need a book for that?  I can condense it into two words.  Squat, shit. It’s not that hard.” “I’d hope you’d take your pants down first,” I say dryly.  “Maybe you do need a book.  I’d hate to be downwind.  Seriously though, it’s about protecting the waterways from contamination.  It used to be a problem in the old days.”   Johanna makes a face at me and tosses the book back with the others.   “Careful,” I caution.  “These books are really old.  Marcus wouldn’t like it if they got damaged.”  I remove the books from Johanna’s reach and place them back on the side table.  Marcus has loaned them to me to read.  They are from the Capitol library and are irreplaceable.   Johanna shrugs and turns her attention to picking at her cuticles.  She’s a nail biter like me.  

Johanna is easily bored.  Restless, always looking for something to do.  I think it’s a coping mechanism of hers.  An active mind keeps it from dwelling on other things.   “Dinner should be ready soon,” I say.  “You came over at the right time.  Marcus is a really good cook.”  I can hear him moving about in the kitchen.  He’s taken over the cooking since he moved in.  I think he likes to be in control over what’s served up.  He’s a vegetarian, which means he doesn’t eat meat.  It’s the oddest thing I’ve ever heard of, but so far, I haven’t missed meat with my evening meals.  And since he’s doing the cooking, I can’t complain.  Besides, a takeaway restaurant has just opened not far from the school. It makes the juiciest, meatiest hamburgers you can imagine.  I have one for lunch most days.   “Vegetarian, I suppose,” says Johanna without enthusiasm.  “What is it tonight?  Curried tofu?” “Actually, I think it is,” I say.  The aroma emanating from the kitchen suggests that it could be.  “You should have stayed with Peeta if you don’t like vegetarian.  He’s at home, isn’t he?  I saw Lace come through the village gates about an hour ago.  Don’t tell me they kicked you out?” “No,” replies Johanna with an annoyed expression.  “It was my idea.  I just couldn’t stand it.  The two of them are so boring together.  All they talk about is the wedding.   When I left them, they were in a serious discussion about what colour the napkins should be for the reception.  Who cares about fucking napkins?” “Obviously, they do,” I reply.  “Peeta’s always been a romantic.  He’d want everything to be perfect for his big day.” “Yeah, but it’s still only one day.  What happens on the day after that?  And then the day after that?   I don’t think those fools have thought beyond the wedding.  Did you know that Haymitch and Peeta got into an argument about his and Lace’s plans for the future?  Would you believe they don’t have any?” “Don’t they?  Well, they must have thought about it since, because Peeta told me of them the other day.  He wants to open his own bakery, have five kids, and Lace will work from home so she can take care of them.”   Johanna snorts dismissively.  “And how do you think that will work out?” I shrug helplessly.  It perfectly sums up how I feel about all things related to Peeta lately.  “It probably won’t.  Peeta loves his job at Carters.  It wouldn’t surprise me if they make him a partner at some point.  If he opens his own bakery, he’d just be taking on a responsibility he doesn’t want.   It would put him in competition with the Carters too.   As for Lace, it’s a big comedown if she swaps her shop to working at home.   She moved to a foreign district, and even lied about her origins, to own her own shop.  And how on Earth do you get any work done with five kids, anyway?” I imagine five little Peetas, all ashy blond hair and bright blue eyes, running around the village, playing and laughing.  It’s awful how much that hurts – the thought of Peeta and Lace having children together.   I don’t know if I want children, but if I did, I’d want them with Peeta.   “It sounds like it was pulled out of their arse,” says Johanna contemptuously.  Suddenly she sits up straight.  “Wait, what did you mean about Lace lying about her origins?”   “Oh, nothing really serious.  Lace should have told Peeta about it by now.  Her family was falsely suspected of colluding with the Capitol, and something Lace did led to it.  She changed her name and lied about her social status when she came here, so rumors wouldn’t follow her, I guess.  Said she was a factory worker when she’s really from the owner class.  I found out about it when I was in 8 recently. Only Haymitch and I know.  And Arthur, who’s an old friend of hers.” “The same Arthur I met in the pub?” Johanna asks. “Yes, that’s him.  He’s been in love with Lace since they were children.  Poor man, I think it might be even worse for him than it is for me.  He’s had to watch Lace in love with two men now.  And Lace doesn’t seem to have a clue how he feels about her.”  I pause here, because on reflection I’m not so sure that she’s not.  It’s just that she’s got used to it.  Takes it for granted.  It occurs to me that Lace and I might have more in common than I thought.  

“She’s possessive about him though,” I continue. “I don’t think she likes the idea of him being with another. Too used to his attention focused on her, I guess.”

Johanna settles back into her chair, her brow creased in thought.  “Interesting,” she says. “What’s interesting?” I ask suspiciously. Johanna has her scheming face on. “Oh, nothing in particular. I was just thinking about Arthur.  Still waters run deep sort of thing.” “Right,” I say, unconvinced.

Johanna goes back to examining her cuticles. “I’ve been watching the tapes Aurelius sends. Haymitch thought I’d add another perspective and Peeta agreed.  There’s more of the Quell stuff now.”  A grin spreads across her face.   “He sent the part where I slapped you across the face.”  Evidently the thought of it gives her pleasure.  “Then there was a lot of explaining about which of us knew about the plot to get you and Peeta out, and what went wrong.  Peeta got mad at Haymitch all over again.  But we figure it’s a positive thing.  Emotions will come with the memories and they all have to be worked through.”   “Yeah, I guess,” I say.  A shame it’s not always the emotions you want.  Not when it comes to me, anyway.  “Was there anything else?” “Just that TV special with you modelling wedding gowns for the public to vote on.” My mind travels back to that day.  The day of the photo shoot.  I had to model six gowns, each with their own headpiece, jewelry, makeup and hair style.  It was tedious and exhausting work, made even more so because I didn’t want to be a bride.  “What did Peeta say?” “Not much,” says Johanna.  “He just said he remembered how much you hated it, that’s all.  He didn’t have any questions.” I say nothing.  What is there to say?  He’s right.  I hated it. I can just imagine what he must have been thinking as he watched it.  My unwillingness compared to Lace’s happiness and excitement. She would have loved doing the photo shoot.  Trying on all those Cinna designed gowns.  And then the prospect of marrying Peeta.  

For a while now, I’ve been questioning Dr Aurelius’ choice when it comes to the tapes.  In almost everything he sends; I seem to be either hostile or indifferent towards Peeta. Or I’m acting, or it’s ambiguous, like the date on the roof.  There’s been not one tape that shows genuine romantic love between us.  I don’t take it personally.   I know this isn’t about me, and Peeta is the patient.  But there must a reason why he’s sent the tapes he has. Surely, with the wedding not far off, Dr Aurelius could see the urgency of speeding the process up.  As far as I can see, there could be only one reason for his choices, and why he’s avoided anything that could really challenge Peeta’s misconceptions.  And it’s because Peeta couldn’t handle it.  Deep down, he doesn’t want to know.  That’s why he interprets the way he does – always on the side of my not having any romantic feelings about him.  Perhaps the knowledge would cause a serious mental breakdown.  So serious, that they’ll have to strap him to a gurney again with hypodermic syringes at the ready when I’m in his presence.  I have to remember what the hijacking made him believe. That I was a mutt, a malevolent being that harmed everything it touched.  That he considers me a friend is an enormous improvement on that.

Maybe I’ve been stupidly unrealistic to hope that Peeta could ever feel the same way about me.   That’s why Dr Aurelius has been encouraging me to make a life for myself outside of Peeta, and to make new relationships.  Patient confidentiality prevents him from telling me what’s really going on in Peeta’s mind, but he’s been giving me clues nonetheless. I’ve just failed to see them.   It’s been in the tapes he sends – tapes he knew that I watched too and could see how Peeta reacted to them.   Perhaps he’s been telling me that I need to accept that Peeta is lost to me forever and I should make a new life.   The more I think of it, the more I’m convinced. The best anyone can hope for is that he regains enough memories to enable him to enter into this marriage with a clearer sense of who he is.   My train of thought is interrupted when Marcus enters the room carrying a large tureen.  He places it at the center of the dining table, alongside a bowl of salad greens and a basket of soft rolls.   It smells delicious and, despite Johanna’s disdain for vegetarian food, she’s first to be seated at the table.  Chunks of tofu bathed in a sauce of aromatic spices and coconut milk on a bed of wild rice.  I serve myself a generous portion but I’m too heartsick to really enjoy it. Neither Marcus or Johanna seem to pick up on it.  They’re in a lively debate about the merit of using stunts to attract publicity for the cause, such as stripping naked and chaining oneself to a tree. “Aha!” shouts Johanna in triumph, “So, you did notice.” Marcus shrugs and gives her an amused smile. “Hard not to,” he says.   For dessert there’s dried plums stewed in sweet wine and cinnamon and topped with heavy cream.   “Prunes,” says Johanna.   “What?” I ask. “Dried plums used to be called prunes.   They changed the name for marketing purposes because of the association with old people.  It was to help them shit.” “They should have had a book,” I say, unable to keep my lips from twitching. “Yeah,” laughs Johanna. Marcus looks from me to Johanna and then back again, his eyes questioning.   “Never mind, “says Johanna.  “Inside joke.”  She turns back to me.  “So, are we going to the pub tonight?” “Um, I hadn’t really thought about it,” I reply evasively.  I’m lying. I had thought about it and then decided against it even though it’s a Saturday night and it’s what we usually do. It’s just that Johanna and Max had an altercation last time and I don’t want any more trouble.  It was over Max referring to Peeta as “psycho boy”.  I reminded Johanna that she’s called Peeta the evil mutt version of himself and that she’s no better.  But according to Johanna, it’s different because she’s family. “Don’t worry, I’ll behave,” says Johanna, in a tone she probably thinks is reassuring but really isn’t.   “I promise. No more public scenes.  So, are we going?” Marcus and I exchange glances.  He gives his head a slight nod and I turn back to Johanna.  “All right.” I still have misgivings, but it doesn’t do me good to stay home and mope.   “Good.  I’ll just race over to Peeta’s to grab my coat while you two clean up. I’ll meet you at the gates in twenty minutes.”   Marcus collects the plates and cutlery while I reach for the tureen.  “I’ll take care of the dishes,” he says.  “Why don’t you get yourself ready?  This won’t take long.”   “OK,” I say, “But I’m doing all the dishes tomorrow.”  Marcus is so nice.  The easiest, most unobtrusive house guest you can imagine.  Helps out with the housework, knows when to talk, and when not to. Even Buttercup likes him, and he’s not a cat that takes kindly to strangers. I trek upstairs to change my clothes for something more suitable than the track pants and baggy sweater I’m wearing.  I settle for black pants in a stretchy velvet-like fabric and a deep-red long-sleeved shirt.  A light make-up and a brush of my hair and I’m done. Marcus is already at the door, jacket on, the hall light picking out the golden notes in his hair. “You look great,” he tells me, with a warm smile.  “You should wear red more often. It suits you.”   Suddenly I’m transported back to another time, another place.  Marcus has disappeared, and there stands sixteen-year-old Peeta, in the black unitard and cape of fluttering steamers we wore for the tributes parade.  “You should wear flames more often,” he had said. “They suit you,” And then he gave me a smile so genuinely sweet and with just the right touch of shyness.   The memory must cause something to change in my face, something fond and nostalgic, because when Marcus reappears, there’s a different light in his eyes and I find myself blushing.  Why, I don’t know. “Thanks,” I mumble, turning away to reach for my coat from the hall stand.   We walk the short distance to the Village gates where Johanna should be waiting for us. She is.  But she’s not alone.  Peeta and Lace are there too.

“I asked them if they’d like to join us,” she explains.   “They were going into town anyway, so I thought we could all go in together and have a drink.” “I hope it’s alright,” says Peeta.  His eyes travel between Marcus and me. “Of course,” I say with false brightness. The last thing I want is an evening in Peeta and Lace’s company and having to watch them with their hands all over each other.   “It will be fun.” Walking five abreast proves awkward, and we separate into two groups with Marcus and me walking ahead.  To get more distance between us, I quicken my pace slightly until we’re just out of conversation range.  I don’t want to listen to the happy couple cooing at each other. But rather than giving them their space, Johanna has chosen to hang back to walk with them rather that out in front with Marcus and me.   I turn my head to see what she’s up to, and she’s at Peeta’s side, chatting away.  She has one hand to the side of her mouth, as if she’s telling secrets.  Their eyes are on me, and I know I’m being talked about. Since there’s little I can do without causing a fuss, I turn my attention back to the road and to what Marcus is saying. “. . . a lake about half a day’s walk from here.  I think it’s worth exploring in detail.  What do you say to a two or three-day camp?  We’d be back in time for your teaching job.” A lake.  That must be my lake. The lake where my father taught me to swim.  A place I never wanted to share, even with Gale. A place that belonged only to my father and me.  It’s not unexpected.  Marcus was bound to get to it sooner or later. But hearing about it now, with the physical reminder of an even greater loss close by, it’s almost too much to take.   “Sure, “I tell him, with a wan smile. “There’s a concrete hut with a hearth. We can shelter in that.” I bite my lip to keep the tears at bay.  Feeling sorry for myself won’t help.  But I want so much to turn heel and go home.  But I can’t.  Not without some plausible excuse and I can’t think of one.  So I keep walking, one foot after the other, and take comfort that in a few hours my steps will be taking me in the opposite direction towards home, and this horrible night will soon be over.

I’m surprised when Marcus takes me by the hand.  I recognize that he’s reaching out in sympathy, even though he doesn’t know the half of it.  His hand is warm and comforting.  It’s been so long since anyone touched me like this, with any real consciousness behind it, and I clasp hold of his hand in same way I clung to Peeta on those nights on the train.   As a bulwark against dangers that could descend at any moment.  

When we arrive at our destination, Marcus and I wait at the door for the others to catch up.  Lace is in a buoyant mood, but Peeta’s smile seems forced.   As Johanna passes by, she pulls me aside.  “That was brilliant,” she whispers. “Keep it up.”

“Keep what up?”  But Johanna is already through the door and doesn’t hear me.  

It’s noisy inside, and crowded, but we manage to find a table that will seat all of us.  I spy Max and Arthur at the bar, and I raise an arm to attract their attention.  Max nudges Arthur to follow him, but hesitates when he sees Johanna.   Johanna responds with a devilish grin, but then dips her head towards Peeta.  No one is fighting over Peeta tonight.  Not while Peeta’s here.   And that’s at least one thing I don’t have to worry about.