#so i'm remedying that by just making a fresh post hope you understand

[autistickaitovocaloid]

(Reprised/rephrased version of a previous post I made)

Can people on the internet stop looking at an artist drawing a character fat and immediately going "that's disgusting you're some kind of freak because no one would want to look like that irl". Do you realise how weird you sound.

[calvin-af-crone]

it's not nice to call people fucking fools, sorry for passive aggressione but in my culture we use raw milk as medicine, i can testify to its benefit, after having terrible pneumonia and part of my lungs coating separated from tissue underneath even modern medicine doctor said row goat milk was best remedy, now as good as new i can sing my lungs out. secret is in how you farm animals. he didn't buy milk on internet they're his sheep he knows what they ate for breakfast lunch and dinner.

Thank you for the opportunity to correct my previous post & add:

NOT ALL RAW MILK IS THE SAME!

By comparing goat's milk to sheep's milk, you juggled apples & oranges. Please keep reading to understand the critical difference.

I'm going to focus on one example of a harmful bacteria— Salmonella. It is a naturally occurring bacteria that doesn't usually harm chickens, sheep, wild birds, & other small wild animals. It makes humans violently ill but not all animals. It is passed on in their shit & the living bacteria can survive in the soil for up to 32 hours. Pecking the ground for their feed, chickens can get it. Grazing grass on an organic farm, sheep can get it.

In sheep & chickens, salmonella has "host-adapted" & the infections are "sub-clinical", meaning there are no symptoms. Many baby lambs are born w/ salmonella, which they get from their mothers. Chicken eggs are coated w/ a lubricate that can contain salmonella. Raw meat has warnings about handling because of the likelihood of contamination. And we are warned about consuming raw eggs for the same reason! Always weigh risks over benefits.

Sheep & chickens can ingest a critical amount of salmonella but don't show symptoms until they are near death! No one can be completely sure their sheep herd or chicken flock is uninfected unless they are raised in factory cages where they never come into contact w/ natural soil or other animals! And no caring person mistreats animals that way on an organic farm.

I'm not being mean when I call someone a fool for ignoring the last hundred years of scientific research. I hope it stings enough to convince others to avoid the risk of drinking raw milk. Commercially available raw milk has to fulfill standard requirements to minimize the risk. Drinking it fresh from an unregulated farm is much more risky.

With goat's milk, your doctor could be reasonably sure it wasn't contaminated! Because unlike sheep & chickens, cows & goats get sick from salmonella just like humans do! They don't survive to pass it onto their babies. And no one is gonna milk an animal who can't stop shitting & bellowing in distress. BUT, an infected cow or goat could be highly infected the day before they show symptoms! So...

Raw cow & goat milk is probably okay; raw sheep milk, probably NOT okay. Why take the risk?

[wilstudies]

Hi wil, sorry to bother you again, but I really need some help. I'm studying French, English language and English literature at A-level and I have mocks in 3 weeks. French is fine because of all the extra work I did over the summer, but English lang and lit is decidedly...not. I have ADHD, and was also generally not having a good time of it over the first term, so I wasn't really revising as I went. I'm not entirely sure how I should go about studying, because I cannot focus at home at ALL and my sixth form is closed. Do you have any advice for studying A-levels with mental health conditions?

you're not bothering me at all, so no worries :D

in my experience, it's all about trial and error and can be very hit and miss :( but, at the bottom of this post i've linked some advice columns i found helpful when looking for ways to make studying accessible to neurodivergents, or those with mental illness.

my no. 1 piece of advice is that you optimise your environment according to your headspace. some days it's easier for me to work at a desk, with a few candles, a lofi playlist and completely romanticise it. other days, i get out my bed-desk and curl up in bed, with a twitch stream in the background.

i find it is worth planning a go-to method of engaging all of your senses. whether that be a playlist of crunchy music, a rocking chair at your desk or chewing gum. it's about finding an optimum state of stimulation, to be able to focus on the task at hand. try using a variety of study methods for the same effect - recording/listening to summary podcasts; the 'match' interactive on quizlet; youtube videos of exam paper walkthroughs.

it's also helpful to understand your personal signs of burnount and overstimulation, and how to remedy them efficiently. i tend get tense aches and pains and a stuffy head when i'm starting to burnout, so, i splash my face in cold water, walk around my house to stretch everything out and take some deep breaths of fresh air. i never go back to working until i feel better, as that just makes my burnout worse in the long-term. pro-tip: a weighted blanket and a good tv series are a blessing for burnout you just cannot shake.

if it’s possible definitely try studying at your local library or a café! if not, perhaps get yourself a study buddy either irl or online.

how to complete your tasks if you can’t do routines

how to study while having mental health issues 

how to change your study environment when you’re self-isolating

saving your grades from a mental health crisismy list of random mental health tips from an AGE ago

how i stay focused while studying (masterpost)

as for subject specific tips, there’s plenty of useful youtube videos detailing former students’ experiences with revision, mocks and final exams!

my post on revising with a quickly approaching deadline

i hope you find this helpful !! my asks and dms are always open if you ever need to talk/vent <3

[mooniefics]

— a life in your shape

pairing : jean kirschtein / reader

word count : 2.5k

tags : unrequited love, pining, near death experience, confession of love, hurt no comfort lol

warnings : canon-typical violence, descriptions of injury to the reader

summary : you've always wanted it, always pictured it, always ached for it. you loved when jean looked you way. all you'd ever wanted was a life with him, not just a life in his shape.

— originally posted 1 / 22 / 21 on ao3 —

the mess hall was buzzing with life, rowdy with the chatter of dozens of cadets seated at long tables and speaking through swallows of their food. glasses were lifted and set down, bowls and plates clinking, utensils scraping sharply over various surfaces, nearly so loud that you could barely hear yourself think. but it all seemed to come to an abrupt silence when you settled your eyes back on him, taking in his formerly pale complexion now bronzy and sun-kissed from your hours of training, the annoyed yet playful glances he shot to connie and sasha as he worked through his soup and bread, full lips forming words that you couldn’t quite focus.

you were almost embarrassed of how smitten you were with jean, but in your mind, you couldn't understand how anyone wouldn't be taken with him. his thin frame had filled out with lean muscle in the year and a half that you'd been training together in the 104th corp, somehow managing to grow even taller than he already was on that first day, still so spirited with his persistence to be among the best of this class, a lively spark that never seemed to dampen gleaming behind his eyes.

"oh god, this again, jean?" you heard connie bemoan exaggeratedly, pulling you from the trance that you were surprised the other three at the table hadn't taken notice of.

jean was almost pouting now, and you would've found it so endearing had it not been the next words to spill from his mouth, indignant and full of tenacity. "don't be an ass, i've been trying to figure out a good excuse to sit with her for days now."

you followed his gaze despite knowing exactly who you'd find his eyes locked on, and forced yourself not to frown when you were met with the sight of mikasa just a few tables away.

"she's out of your league, man. not to mention having a thing for jaeger already, and not to mention that jaeger wouldn't hesitate to hand your ass to you again if you pissed him off like you always do. cut it out."

"connie, that's mean!" sasha feigned offense on jean's behalf, most likely for the sake of goading the reply that came as a distraction to snatch the remainder of bread from his plate.

"i'm just being honest with him here. he's asking for advice, so i gave him some. jean always talks about being realist and yet he— hey is that my food?!"

you turned away just as connie was lunging himself across the table, hearing the sounds of his fruitless efforts to tear the loaf from the girl's mouth, propping yourself up on your elbows and allowing your head to fall into your hands with a heavy sigh.

"what do you think?" in an instant, jean's eyes were on you, amber irises looking so intently at you that you could already feel a bothersome heat flushing your face. but registering his question sobered you, and stealing a glance at the beautiful dark-haired girl seated somewhere to your left was all in took to snuff out the light flutter in your chest.

"i don't know, jean. i think connie's kind of right about the whole eren thing." you were honest with him on a surface level, but it still didn't feel good to see him frown when you told him something he obviously didn't want to hear. you tried to remedy it by offering something more introspective—something a bit more true to your heart. "what i mean is that.. i think you're selling yourself short. mikasa obviously has her sights set elsewhere at the moment, and i just think you deserve someone who can bring the same sort of.." you struggled with your words for a moment, how could you not when he was leaning forward like that, listening so intently to you and you alone. "the same sort of passion. someone who can reciprocate." someone like me. but you bit those foolish words back.

"you understand, don't you?" he implored, looking past the bickering mess that sasha and connie had devolved to and gazing with such longing in the other girl's direction, "i mean.. i've never seen anyone like her, no one as beautiful.." each word gouged at your heart, a cold, empty sensation that left your chest feeling painfully hollow. "i know you're a girl, but you can see it too, right?"

you could see it, you were painfully aware of how you could never match up to her unfamiliar yet alluring features, that graceful, slender frame that could somehow soar through the air with ease and still thrown you down onto your back so hard it would knock the wind out of you, introversion that gave off such a charming air of mystery to her admirers.

"yeah," you mumbled back, ignoring how a huffing connie fell heavily back into his seat beside jean, defeated, sasha happily gulping down her unfairly earned chunk of bread, only taking notice of how jean was too fixated on mikasa to pay your dismay any mind, "i see it alright."

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

the air was thick with an unrelenting heat, stinking of steam and coppery with fresh blood, your vision fading in and out. your head was ringing with a deafening, high pitched peal and such an unbearable, crippling pain. you could feel your boots dragging across the hot dry dirt as something tugged you back by the collar of your shirt, and the terror of a titan with its misshaped limbs and mouth hauling you to your demise made you thrash aimlessly, screams for help spilling out as a disjointed groan of pain. and though it almost sounded as if you were underwater, sinking further and further beneath the lapping waves of your impending unconscious, you heard it, muffled, desperate, thick with tears, your name spilling from his lips.

and suddenly you remembered, you remembered the kidnapping and the unfaithful comrades and the mission to save humanity's last hope, your former friend now an almost unrecognizable abomination with ymir, bertholdt, and eren sitting atop his shoulders, clasped in his monstrous hands, that had now resorted to flinging titans in his primal desperation for escape. and as you blinked away the spots blacking out your vision, head lolling uselessly to the side, you could see your horse, half crushed in a puddle of red on the yellow grass, and realized that the warmth streaming down the side of your face is your own blood.

"jean..?" you mumbled, uselessly, barely coherent, but the near sob of relief from behind you is like an anchor back to reality.

you could see his calves on either side of you, feet kicking up clouds of dust as he pushed you both back, further from the fray and carnage, as far as he could muster. one of your blade scabbards was missing, you could feel that the clip on your gas tank had snapped off in your spectacular fall caused by the titan that was flung down in your path, irreparable damage most likely made to the fine mechanisms within the housing of your gear. you felt utterly hopeless, watching as the shade of a tree just barely shielded you from the blazing light of the sinking sun, hearing jean's gasping pants from behind you, feeling how rapidly his chest was rising and falling against the back of your head as you slumped into his body, leaden limbs weighing you down uselessly.

"jean." you wheezed, trying desperately to crane your heavy head back to meet his eyes one last time, eyes that no longer harbored the naive passion of youth but still gleamed so radiantly, "leave me.. here. you're g'nna— gonna die.. if you stay..."

you could feel his violent trembles now, feel him rip his green cloak from his shoulder to press against the throbbing wound on your head. "no. i-i'm staying. i n-n-need," he was scared, you knew he was terrified of allowing what happened to marco to happen to you, or sasha, or connie, or anybody, even if the boy's death was nowhere near his fault, "i need to s-save you."

but you could also feel something else—feel it coming—the terrible, earth trembling footfalls of a titan making a shambling, uncoordinated advance to you and the scent of your blood. and suddenly jean was screaming, a sound so raw and petrified that you couldn't help but cry yourself at the sound of it. he laid you down on the ground, bunched cloak pillowing your bleeding skull, unable to push himself to his feet but still drawing his last blade to swing at the thing coming to kill you both, covering your battered body with his own.

and in that moment, you hated yourself. though your head was swimming and your lucidity was waning, you knew that you would both die there, under the baking sun and in the jaws of a titan, and it would be your fault. every regret that you'd ever harbored flooded your mind: not hugging your mother long enough when you still had the chance, not drinking that liquor when squad leader hange had offered it to you, and, most of all, never having the bravery to be honest with jean.

and you mourned all that lost time in those final moments, every late night you'd spent as trainees under the stars when you and your friends would sneak out of the dormitories to talk at some ungodly hour, every shared meal where you didn't speak nearly enough to him, every second of the crushing embraces you'd offered each other when the thought of your fallen friends caught up to you and proved to be far too much to handle on your own. how could you have done so much yet so little with your life?

and just as the titan was stumbling upon you, jean's scream of terror dampening out into a faithless cry, the thing was gone, galloping away to join a newly assembled horde descending upon one single point on the plain. but somehow, you felt no relief, not as you reached out a weak, trembled hand to grasp the blood and dirt streaked fabric of his shirt.

and as he turned to you, eyes still wide and body shaking with horror, thrumming with the adrenaline of near-death, you whispered, hoarse and tired as your grasp on the world slipped away. "i love you, jean. i love you."

your eyes fell shut, the involuntary spiral down further and further into the deep waters of unconsciousness pulling you in deeper and deeper by the second. you were grateful that you at least got to say something meaningful as your last words.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

there was a bright light, delicate, billowing fabric flouncing about in your bleary gaze as your eyes barely opened, something wrapped tight around your head, not making the pressure of the pounding headache any better. you couldn't fight the groan that even the small movement of turning onto your back caused, but you tried to force your lids open just an inch more at the sound of a gasp coming from somewhere in the room.

there were fast footsteps, a few shouts of "sasha, no!" and then a crushing weight on your chest, squeezing around you, pulling you up in bed as a tearful sob of your name came from a comfortingly familiar voice.

"sasha. please. h-hurts." you barely managed to croak out, feeling yourself been torn free—or rather, her  torn away—as connie yelled.

"get off them, you moron, they're fucking injured!!"

"i'm s-s-sorry!" she wailed, allowing herself to be dragged to the door by the disgruntled boy, "i'm j-just so happy you're s-s-still alive!!!"

"and i am too, but that doesn't mean i'm gonna go throw myself on top of them while they're in the hospital!"

their bickering was almost comforting in a way, allowing the strain in your chest from sasha's hug to ease as you watched them elbow each other in the sides on their way out of the room to take their loudness out into the hall, blowing raspberries and struggling to not laugh through their feigned anger. and finally your gaze was allowed to wander over to the furthest wall from your bed, and you saw jean, staring down at his shoes, brow furrowed and lip bitten. and he seemed almost startled to find yourself in his gaze, feet slowly taking him to your side.

"i owe you my life, you know?" you said as he settled himself on the edge of the mattress, still not meeting your gaze.

"you don't owe me anything. you shouldn't feel in debt to me."

"but i do," you risked to settle your hand over his, finally drawing his worried, amber eyes onto yours, and you could feel your heart beginning to pick up, the butterflies that you had always forced to settle with a pessimistic thought to squash your optimism light in your chest, "i meant what i said before i passed out in the field. i always have."

and for just a moment, you thought that this was finally it, that you would no longer have to languish over wasted time and wasted words, fingers just barely curling around his warm palm. then, a knock at the door, light and delicate before the handle turned, pushing open to reveal mikasa.

and you caught every small movement of jean's features, the way his eyes sparked with a familiar light, the sudden, faint flush of color across his slender face, lips parting and just barely perking up at the ends. an endless, unwavering adoration.

"eren is awake, if you'd like to talk to him." that was all she had peeked in to say, but jean was still gazing at the door for a moment too long after she'd left.

"u-um.. if you don't mind—"

"go ahead." you told him, gently, pulling your hand away, retreating as far as your body could into the mattress, under the covers, turning your gaze away.

and though he'd slowly, almost nervously exited your room, you could hear the clear pick-up in his pace as soon as he'd shut the door behind him and exited into the hall, probably rushing to try and catch mikasa for a moment alone in the hallway before he had to share her attention with everyone else.

and it hurt, like a blade buried between your ribs, being jerked and twisted with every memory of his affinity, the one that was never directed at you despite how you craved it. and you'd realized that you had melded a life in his shape, a life where you were always just a few steps too far behind, hand outstretched, reaching for him as you hurried to grasp at any minuscule opportunity to be with him, speak to him, hear his laugh and see his near blinding smiles that never seemed to last long enough to you.

but, perhaps one day, someday farther into the future. and if not then, maybe in another life.

[hajimailhinata]

hey hinata, a friend just left me and i'm pretty broken up about it. we were friends for a while but when it came down to it she left me, with a bunch of excuses as to why we couldn't be friends. i don't really know what to do. do you have any advice? sorry for invading your inbox like this

You’re not invading anything! It’s totally understandable to feel confused in your situation. I’d be just as upset. Honestly, even reading your message, I feel a little upset! It sounds like this person might not have been committed to your friendship if they have to rationalize ending it. But... at that point, maybe it’s a sign that she wasn’t really all that good a friend after all.

Please don’t take offense. It’s entirely possible that things started out really good, but over a while, people can change even without you noticing. Sometimes, they’re scared of letting those changes show, so you never really know anything shifted until after it’s too late. But that doesn’t mean she should’ve hidden her feelings from you, by any means. I’m sorry that things had to happen so suddenly.

I wrote about this recently because I had your message on my mind. That post about persevering, no matter the loss. I still mean the things I said then, but I know you deserve to hear a lot more than that. After all, you’ve had enough thrown on you as is. So I’ll try to be less vague and speak more personally.

While I think it’s important to keep yourself going in spite of your sadness, it’s equally important not to force yourself into impartial closure. It can be hard to accept what’s happening to you. You might not fully understand it. You might not want to. And... if you fake your way through resolution, then it’s only going to resurface. The truth is, it might take a long time to work through the way you feel and what made you feel that way. It’s okay to take that time, though. Let yourself process the situation naturally. But even while you’re doing that, don’t let it be an excuse to fixate on the details. 

No matter the reasons she gave, it ultimately boils down to one truth: You guys weren’t the same people who first became friends. That’s normal. Changing is normal, and you should never try to stunt it. Because... even if she had excuses to make about you, the way she went about ending things already shows that she wasn’t the same friend you made, either.

With that in mind, you both deserve to continue your lives. Even if it can’t be with her, you don’t have to abstain from the things you like. You don’t have to hold a spot in your heart for someone who isn’t there. Give yourself things to look forward to!

You might not make a friend like her again, but that’s the same of anyone. She won’t have one like you, either. So instead of trying to compare everyone you meet afterwards to her shadow, remember to see them for who they are. Don’t look for a replacement. Look for something new! Because from new will come fresh memories, and the likelihood of longevity that was absent before. The possibilities are in your hands.

If you can take away anything, recognize the patterns that led up to now. Account for her excuses. If there’s some truth to them, learn from that. If not, learn from her own behaviors. Even if you can’t keep her in your life, from her exit you can learn ways to remedy future instances. You can prolong your relationships with others with a little honesty, a bit of tact, and the willingness to try again.

You deserve that happiness. I sincerely hope you can obtain it.