#so many factors to analyze like ugh I could talk all day about this

[fc43]

Franco went from having no money to get to F2 to now collecting sponsors like Infinity Stones and what's most impressive is that it all started with a hashtag. i need you to sit down and digest my words: it all started with a #….

[smokinthottie]

Spent the entirety of my shower just now daydreaming about the TV blog I'd make if I had the funds for box sets.

I'd call it CBS Summer Global Adventure Series cuz The Amazing Race would be the first show I'd "review." (At least until I get a cease & desist from CBS lol then I'd probably change the name to TV Time with Eden or smth corny like that.)

I'd pick quotes out that would make good episode titles if they named them that way from the start. I'd screencap the beautiful scenery/cinematography in each ep, review the detours and road blocks, break down how Wifey and I would tackle the challenges if we were running, talk about the evolution of my opinions of teams from the beginning to how they impress/disappoint me or otherwise make me change my mind on my first judgment of them. I could go on and on with that one.

Then I'd do some easy sitcom to go along w it, probably Friends lol. I'd take a wack at the ep titles there too, see if I could come up w a better The One With. I'd pick out my favorite jokes or slapstick moments for fun clips, highlight the best and worst outfits in each ep, talk up the 90s/early 00s nostalgia factors, def get a lil bit critical of the parts that "haven't aged well."

I'd do more serious stuff after I got into the swing of things. I'd probably start with smth like The Wire or Breaking Bad (of course w the latter I'd need to do Better Call Saul and El Camino as well.) These would be great for putting together photosets of awesome shots, highlighting good quotes and running themes, analyzing foreshadowing and twists, all that good, deep stuff.

Ahhh I have so many great ideas for other shows too!! I know my taste is p bad a lot of the time lmao but I think it'd just be super fun to talk about that kinda stuff at length. Ohhh and spotlighting trivia and behind the scenes stuff too!!

Ugh there's soooo much I could do! One day! ^.^

[calpalirwin]

Life in Apartment 4D

Summary: 2 musicians become roommates with a writer and a photographer. Shenanigans ensue.

A/N: @philthepegacorn​ and I are whores for Mashton. Because fuckin’ duh. A bit of a New Girl AU.

Word Count: 4.7k

And away, and away we go!

__

“Oh, c’mon!” Abigail cursed as the shower spurted water before stopping. “Dani!” the woman hollered.

“Yeah?” was the answer from somewhere else in the apartment.

“We paid the water bill right?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“Are they doing maintenance?”

“No idea,” Danielle’s voice sounded closer as she appeared in the doorway of the bathroom. “Why, what’s up?”

“Watch,” Abigail answered through gritted teeth, twisting the shower on.

“What the fuck?!” Danielle asked in aggravated shock when nothing happened.

“Time to move?”

“Fuck yeah.”

“Where?”

Danielle sighed. “No fuckin’ idea.”

Abigail brought a finger to her lips in thought. “Hmm… Oh! Eh, nah, nevermind. That won’t work.”

“What won’t work?”

“This guy I went to high school with. He posted something the other day about him and his roommate looking for someone.”

“And why won’t that work?”

“You really wanna live with 2 guys?”

“Are they cute?”

Abigail’s cheeks flushed pink. “No comment.”

“Oooo, you’re blushing! So high school boy and his roommate are cute! Or at least high school boy is. So what's the problem exactly? They need roommates, and we need a place to live.”

“Cuz we barely talked in high school. Like we were in the same grade, and shared some classes. But it’s not like we were friends or anything.”

“Aw, was he the cool kid, and you were the nerd? How adorable!” Danielle teased her friend.

“Hey!” Abigail gasped with mock indignation. “I could’ve been the cool one.”

“Mhm, sure ya were,” Danielle continued to tease. “You forget I’ve seen your yearbooks.”

“Okay,” Abigail relented. “I wasn’t the cool kid. But he wasn’t either? Like we were both dweebs. Just different camps.”

“Didn’t stop you from crushing on him though.”

“No, it did not,” Abigail laughed, remembering her high school days with a soft fondness. “But it didn’t matter. We were friendly with each other, sure. But we weren’t close. Certainly not close enough for me to call him up, and be his roommate.”

“Who said you had to call? Just send him a message.”

“Ugh, I hate you…” Abigail groaned, but reached for her phone anyway.

“Oh, you love this, don’t lie.”

~~~

Ashton’s palms were sweaty as he paced about the living room. “Would you relax?” Michael asked, exasperated. “You said she was a cool girl, right?”

“Yeah, from what I remember. But I haven’t seen her in eight years. And it’s not like we were friends. Friendly, but not friends.”

“You had a crush on her, you mean?”

Ashton shrugged, a sheepish look crossing his features. “A little yeah,” he fessed up.

“Please don’t fuck our potential new roommate…”

Ashton’s eyes went wide, and he was about to berate his friend for insinuating such a thing, but was cut off by a knock on the door. “That’s them!” He wiped his palms against his jeans to dry them as he rushed to the door.

Michael sat up straighter on the couch. “Them?”

“Yeah, she has a roommate.” Ashton ran his fingers through his hair, giving it a devil-may-care disheveled look, before pulling the door open. “H-hey.” His greeting got caught in his throat as he looked at the woman in front of him, comparing her with the girl he remembered.

“Hey,” Abigail smiled hesitantly, analyzing Ashton in a similar fashion. “Um, this is my friend, Dani. Dani, this is Ashton. And you must be Michael?” Her teeth nipped into her lower lip as she glanced over to the green-eyed blonde still seated on the couch.

“Yep. Nice to meet ya girls. C’mon in.”

At Michael’s instruction, Ashton snapped out of his haze with a clearing of his throat. “Yeah, please. C’mon in. Have a seat.”

“Roomy,” Danielle commented, walking confidently across the floor and taking a spot on the couch.

“So, what do you girls do?” Michael asked, getting the conversation going as they all sat down.

“I’m a freelance photographer, and Abby’s a writer,” Danielle explained.

“Writer, huh? Anything published?”

Abigail nodded. “Yeah, I had a book of poems published a few years ago. And if you’re worried about space, don’t be. Dani and I both teach on the side, so it’s not like we work from home. I mean, we do. But, not all the time.”

“Nah, it’s not a problem,” Ashton told her. “We work from home a lot, too.”

“Yeah, when we’re not bartending down the street.”

“Oh, you bartend?” Abigail asked, leaning forward a little.

“Pays the bills when music doesn’t,” Michael answered with a shrug. “What was the name of the book you published?”

“Matters of the Heart.”

The green eyes lit up in recognition, a sly smile on his face as he looked over at Ashton. “Hey, i-” Michael started but Ashton gave him a sharp look. “I think I’ve heard of it,” Michael fixed. “Uh… Ash, should we give them a tour of the place?”

~~~

“Fuck!” Michael cursed, slamming the front door shut and stalking to the fridge.

Three sets of eyes watched as the man grabbed a beer, popped the cap, and drank deeply from the green bottle. “What?!” he demanded in agitation.

Abigail and Danielle raised their hands in surrender, leaving Ashton to defuse the situation as the reigning expert on all things Michael. “You alright?” Ashton ventured, sliding his headphones off to hang around his neck, drumsticks still in his hands.

“I’ll give ya two guess,” Michael grinned sardonically.

“Crys-?”

Michael made a string of noises, cutting Ashton off, “Buh, buh, buh! That name’s forbidden from the loft.”

“Okay,” Ashton said with a slow chuckle. “Did you break up?”

Michael leaned his arms against the countertop. “Can you call it a break up if it happens every other week?”

“When you keep getting back with her? No.”

“Fuck you,” Michael scoffed, but amusement laced the words rather than malice. “Like you and Kay were any better.”

“Yeah, but when things broke off, they stayed broken off,” Ashton pointed out.

Michael drained the last drop of his beer, flashing another sarcastic grin. “And you just stayed broken.”

“Fuck you,” Ashton laughed. “Back me up here, ladies. Which is better? A break up that stays a break up? Or a constant back and forth?”

“Oh, hell no,” Danielle said, waving her hands. “Nuh-uh, you’re not dragging me into this.”

“Boo, you’re no fun,” Ashton teased, before turning to Abigail. “Abby?”

“Depends,” the woman shrugged.

“Ooo, a cop out. Not much better than Miss Abstaining,” Michael joined in on the teasing.

The women laughed. “It’s not a cop out,” Abigail went on to defend. “It depends on a number of factors. How long you’ve been dating, break ups aside. How many break ups you’ve had. Whether or not you see other people in between the breaks. And how you feel about each other, of course. The problem is, your answer may be one thing while theirs is another.”

“When the love don’t line up!” Ashton sang for no reason other than he could.

Abigail laughed, “Yeah, kinda. So, I guess my question to you, Mikey, is whether or not you think it’s worth it to keep doing this back and forth?”

Michael shrugged, walking over to plop down on the couch, resting his head in her lap. “No idea. I mean, I like her. I like spending time with her. She’s hot. The sex is good.”

“Jar!” they all scolded, and Michael sighed. He dug into his pocket, pulling out a few bills and flashing them wildly until Ashton grabbed it and shoved it in the jar on the coffee table adeptly labeled “Douche Jar.”

“You sound like a teenager,” Abigail told Michael, her fingers scratching through his hair. “You gotta decide if that’s enough for you now in this stage of your life. And if you’re breaking up with her as frequently as Ash is suggesting, then I think you have your answer. You just keep crashing back together because it’s easier than facing something new. You know your pattern with her. Doesn’t make it a good pattern, though.”

“Yeah, suppose you’re right…” Michael sighed, his eyes closing as Abigail’s fingernails continued to scratch against his scalp.

While the sight of any of the roommates curled up in another’s lap receiving head scratches was not at all an uncommon occurrence as they had all grown rather close during the last six months of cohabitation, a twinge of jealousy stabbed into Ashton and Danielle’s hearts. And while Danielle didn’t fully understand hers, Ashton most certainly did. 

The drummer pocketed his drumsticks, rising to his feet. “What’re you doing?” they questioned as he started dragging chairs into certain positions.

With the chairs in place, Ashton moved to throwing the couch cushions haphazardly about the room. “True American,” he answered.

Michael’s head snapped up. “You don’t drink.”

“A bartender who doesn’t drink?” Abigail asked with an air of impressed approval.

“Staying sober while getting others drunk is my superpower,” Ashton winked, going to the fridge and grabbing the case of beer in there. He set that on the counter before grabbing a case of soda for himself.

“We’re forgetting a key component here,” Danielle interjected. “What the fuck is True American?”

“Drinking game,” Michael answered, helping Ashton set up a tower of drinks smack dab in the middle of the cushions and chairs. “Grab the king, Ash.”

“Catch.” A bottle of whiskey got tossed in the air, Michael catching it with ease, and setting it in the middle of the tower he and Ashton had crafted. “Rules are simple,” Ashton started to explain. “1.) You always have to have a drink in your hand.”

“2.) You have to finish your drink before starting another,” Michael added.

“And 3.) the floor is lava,” they both finished. “Pick your poison.”

Abigail grabbed a can of Coke, while Danielle opted for a beer, both of them waiting hesitantly for the next instructions.

“FDR!” Ashton shouted, cracking open his can, gulping it down fast, and jumping on a cushion.

“JFK!” Michael yelled in response, following suit, finding a perch on a chair.

“Wait what?!” the women asked in amused confusion and they each found their own lava-free spot.

“Drink!” was the only instruction they got.

For the next hour, the loft came alive with loud laughter, hollered American history references, and so much drinking, until the cases were drained, and discarded cans littered the ground. Eyes got glossy sheens or wild looks as the alcohol and caffeine buzzed through their veins.

~~~

“Hey, who’s that guy with Abby?” Ashton asked in a hushed tone.

Michael followed the hazel eyed gaze to where Abigail was sitting in a booth across from another man. If he had to guess, the way she was leaning across the table, a dreamy smile on her face, she was having a good time. And by the looks of it, Ashton didn’t like it one bit. “Oh, that’s um…” Michael scrambled to remember what the girls had been talking about before he left for his shift at the bar. “Nathan, I wanna say? Dani was helping Abby get ready before I left.”

Ashton scoffed. “And he brought her here? What a joke…”

Michael shook his head. “No, Abby arranged it that way. Something about neutral ground in case she was misreading signals.”

“Looks like she can read just fine.” Ashton’s grip on the glass he was drying slipped.

Michael’s hand flashed out to catch it. “Green’s not a good color on you,” he said, handing the glass back.

Ashton cheeks flushed with color. “I’m not jealous.”

The blonde scoffed. “Yeah, and I hate videogames.”

“You love videogames…”

“Yeah, thought we were lying to each other. You ever gonna tell her that you like her?”

Ashton sighed. “I dunno. How do you explain to someone that every time you see them you feel sixteen again? Like I’m seeing her for the first time again but instead of in a school hallway, it’s on my couch at the end of the day? That… all I’ve wanted to do for the last eight months is cross the distance between our rooms, but my head won’t let me believe that she could want me back. I mean, why should she?”

“I imagine you can tell her just like that. And why wouldn’t she want you?”

“Because I’m me. I was a loser in high school, and I’m a loser now.”

“A loser who makes her very happy whenever she’s around him.”

Ashton scoffed in disbelief. “Yeah, right.”

“I’m just saying… she’s never offered to have a writing session with me.”

Ashton blinked, thinking back on more nights than he can count where he and Abigail had stayed up well into the middle of the night, tossing ideas back and forth, some resulting in poems, and others in songs. Then, he looked back over at the woman who was laughing at something her date had said. “Doesn’t matter. Once again I lost out to the guy who didn’t overthink it.”

“Well, not that I’m rooting for her to have a bad time. But I’m always rooting for you.”

Ashton let out a small chuckle. “Thanks. But weren’t you the one who told me not to try and sleep with her?”

“I’m allowed to change my mind. Just when you do get her- and you will- don’t fuck it up.”

“Are you changing your mind because you’re rooting for me? Or are you changing your mind, so you don’t look like a hypocrite when you finally sleep with Dani?”

Michael sighed dreamily at the mention of the fourth roommate. He’d taken Abigail’s advice, opting to break his pattern with Crystal and look towards something new. A something new he hoped would include the snarky, and nerdy photographer.  “Little column A, little column B.”

“Jar,” Ashton deadpanned with roll his eyes. A compromise about when Michael asked Danielle out, he’d ask Abigail out was on the tip of his tongue when the scene across the bar changed. Abigail’s face was pinched with disgust. She sat back with a visible huff, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. There was a small squeal of outrage before Abigail splashed her drink in the man’s face, stalking off to the bathroom.

Michael’s hand landed on top of Ashton’s on the bar, the older man already in motion to hop over the bar and rush to her aid. “No,” Michael hissed.

“Why not?!” Ashton hissed back.

“Because if you go after her looking like a bat out of hell, she’s just going to get defensive, and take out her anger on you. Take your jealousy out on him. I’ll get her home.”

“What about your shift?”

“I got a break coming up in a bit. Just say I ate something bad, and got sick.”

With their objectives clear, they both jumped into action, Ashton stalking off to give Mr. Bad Date a piece of his mind. “You need to leave,” Ashton spoke clearly, authority ringing confidently in his tone, trying to keep his snarl at a minimum.

“That bitch threw a drink in my face, but I need to leave?”

“One, she’s been a loyal customer of this bar for several months now. Two, I don’t ever wanna hear you associate that word with her. Three, I don’t ever wanna see you in here, or around her ever again. Am I making myself clear?”

The man rolled his eyes, pushing himself out of the booth, the drink dripping down his shirt and onto the tips of his shoes. “Whatever,” he scoffed.

While Ashton watched Mr. Bad Date slink off into the night to go piss off some other girl, Michael was rapping softly on the single use bathroom. “Abby? It’s Mike. C’mon, let me in. I saw what happened. Abby… Don’t make me get the key.”

The door opened reluctantly, revealing Abigail with red-rimmed eyes.

“You alright?”

She shook her head. “No…”

“You handled him well. Nice throw. Ash is out there finishing the job. Tossing him out on his ass.”

Abigail laughed despite herself, imaging the sight of Ashton intimidating the everloving shit out of her date. The scum deserved so much worse than Ashton’s bad temper. “Thanks.”

“C’mon,” Michael beckoned. “I’ll walk you home.”

“Aren’t you on the clock?”

“I’m on my break. And my stomach’s feeling kinda funny.” He clutched at his stomach and dramatically groaned, his face twisting in fake pain.

With his arm around her shoulder, and hers around his waist, the duo made their way out of the bar, nodding at Ashton as they walked by. “God, guys suck!” Abigail complained as the night air hit her face. “No offense,” she added apologetically.

“None taken. I know you don’t mean me.”

“Do I have a sign on my forehead reading ‘please be a douche’ or something?”

Michael chuckled, giving a shake of his head. “No. You’re just looking in the wrong places.”

Abigail scoffed lightly. “What? Is this the part where you confess your undying love for me, and hope I feel the same?” she teased. “Ever since you first walked into my apartment,” she added with dramatic flair.

Michael laughed louder, pushing open the door to their building. “Not me, sorry.”

“Aw, you don’t love me?”

“I adore you,” he clarified. “My life has definitely changed for the better since you and Dani moved in. But-”

“Oh…” Abigail interrupted, his words clicking. “You like Dani, don’t you?”

That wasn’t what Michael had planned on saying, but he nodded anyway. “Yeah. Think I got a shot with her?”

“Only one way to find out,” she told him, unlocking the apartment. “Thanks for tonight, Mikey,” she said, stretching up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek affectionately before disappearing into her room.

Danielle waited for Abigail’s door to close before revealing her position on the couch. “You were her date?!” The words were a harsh accusation.

“What?!” Michael laughed.

“Abby! Her date tonight. It was you?!” Again, the words were harsh.

Michael continued to laugh, only making Danielle angrier. “And what if I was?” he taunted, closing the distance between them to tower over her.

“Well... I...” she sputtered, crossing her arms and having to tilt her chin upwards to look at him. “She likes Ashton, so you’re wasting your time,” she concluded with the confession that she thought would hit Michael the hardest.

“And Ashton likes her back, and I’d never do that to my best friend. Plus, I have my own eyes on someone else.”

“Oh, yeah? Then why’d you go on a date with Abby?”

“When did I ever confirm that statement?”

“Well… she just…”

“Thanked me for walking her home after the guy she was on the date with turned out to be a douche.”

“Why didn’t Ash?”

“Because Ash got jealous, and his temper would have clashed with hers. I felt bad her date sucked, but I was the one of us with the head cool enough to talk her down. So Ash used his temper to kick the guy out, and I used my cool head to not aggravate her further.”

“That’s really smart actually…”

“Mhm. Done being jealous now?”

“Jealous? Who said I was being jealous?”

Michael gave a shake of his head, chuckling lightly. “I’mma tell you the same thing I told Ash. Green is not your color.” And before either of them could get in another word edgewise, he ducked down his head, connecting his lips with hers.

~~~

In the morning, both girls were bursting with the news they wanted to tell each other. “So, how’d your date go?” Danielle asked as they ate their breakfast.

“Horrible,” Abigail laughed. “Just God fuckin’ awful. His jokes were cringey at best, and sexist at worst. I don’t know what I would’ve done if Mikey hadn’t saved me. Probably kept crying in the bathroom like a girl at Prom.”

Danielle laughed with her. “Thank God for Mikey, right?”

“Oh, definitely,” Abigail agreed. “Who knew guy roommates would come in handy. Although, for a second there, I thought he was gonna try, and hit on me himself.”

Danielle shuddered and pulled a face. “Bleck!”

Abigail shrugged. “Eh. Wouldn’t be that awful if he had. He’s a great guy. Just not the roommate I want hitting on me. So, how was your night? I heard you and Mikey going at it there for a minute. You guys good?”

Danielle’s teeth nipped into her lower lip, remembering how she’d woken up in Michael’s bed after their kiss had escalated at a rapid pace. “Oh, yeah. We’re good.”

If the words weren’t a dead giveaway, the blissed out smile was. Abigail’s mouth dropped open. “Ohmigod!” she squealed. Then, in a shocked whisper, “Did you?”

“Oh, yeah,” her friend nodded, the smile getting bigger.

“Ohmigod!” she squealed again, before both women erupted in childlike giggles.

“Ohmigod!” a high pitched shriek joined the mayhem, Michael flapping his hands as he wandered into the kitchen, a dopey grin on his face. “Mornin’ beautiful,” he greeted, placing a kiss to Danielle’s cheek that flushed brightly. “Abby,” he grinned across the table.

“Morning,” Abigail laughed, scraping her seat back, and carrying her plate to the sink. She sighed at the sight, checking the time on the microwave. “Hey, I’m gonna run the dishwasher. You guys got any dishes hiding?”

“Don’t think so,” Danielle said, getting up with her own plate.

“Nope,” Michael said with a shake of his head. “But you might wanna check Ash’s room. Man hoards cups like no one’s business.”

“Yeah, and I’d rather not wait for him to get in from his workout.” Her lips fluttered together in thought as she looked from the sink to down the hallway, deciding which to do first.

“I’ll start in here,” Danielle offered. “You go get the cups from Ash’s room.”

Abigail practically skipped down the hallway towards Ashton’s open door, pausing briefly in the doorway. She’d walked by the man’s room about a million times, but she’d never crossed the threshold. She supposed she could run up to the roof and interrupt his workout… No, she shook her head. They were just cups. It wasn’t like she was going to rifle through his belongings. And the cups were right there on his nightstand. She could see them from where she was standing. No. Ashton wouldn’t care.

With a deep breath, she crossed the imaginary boundary to retrieve the glasses on his nightstand, stilling when she noticed a book resting amongst discarded rings and silver chains; her book. The spine was worn down with deep crease lines, indicating that it was well read. Her heart started to hammer erratically in her chest. When had he bought it, and how much time had he dedicated to give it it’s well-loved appearance, and highly-prized spot right by his bed, always within grasp?

Before she knew what was happening, the book was falling open in her hands. Her butt found the edge of his bed, staring down at her book in her hands. Their hearts and souls resided alongside each other in the form of perfectly typed pages, scrawled blue ink, and streaks of yellow highlighter.

“What are you doing?!” Ashton’s sharp tone snapped Abigail out of her daze.

Her body jolted, a startled gasp flying past her lips, the book landing face down on the floor, some of the pages bending. “Sorry!” she rushed, hurriedly picking up the book. “I was getting the cups off your nightstand, and I saw the book, and I…” she continued, brushing her hand along the cover, and setting it gingerly back on the nightstand.

“And you what?! Just thought you’d start peeking through my things?!”

“Well… I mean… it’s my book.”

“You wrote it, sure. But I paid for it. That’s my copy. You shouldn’t be going through my things.”

“I wasn’t going through them. It was on the nightstand. It’s not like I went digging through your underwear drawer for it,” she said through gritted teeth, her prior embarrassment turning into defensive anger the longer he stood there scolding her like a toddler caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

“Oh, so the book just magically opened up in your hands, and you just magically started reading it?!”

“It’s my book!”

“That I’ve written in!”

“Believe it or not, plenty of people do that, Ashton. That doesn’t make you special.”

“That doesn’t make it less personal!”

“Any less personal than you reading through my most private thoughts?!”

“You fuckin’ published your thoughts for the world to see!”

“And you left it on your nightstand for anyone to see!”

Ashton passed a hand through his hair, exhaling slowly through his nose. “Just get the fuckin’ water glasses…” he muttered after a beat, noticing the shine to her eyes as she held back tears. He didn’t want to be the reason she was crying, when he’d been the one stupid enough to leave the book by his bedside. He should have hidden it in his underwear drawer, but he didn’t like the idea of not having it close at hand. If there was a pocket-sized version, he’d carry that around so he always had it.

“How long?” she asked, her voice shaking with the effort to keep it controlled.

“How long what? How long have the glasses been in here? I dunno. A week maybe. It’s just water though, so it’s not like they’re gross.”

“Not the glasses… the book! How long?”

“4 years…”

“You mean when it got released?”

He gave a quick nod. “Day of.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s good. Because I was proud of you. For doing what you said you were gonna do. For putting your vulnerability out there for everyone to see. Because we’re friends, and friends support each other.” Ashton left out the part where it was also because he was in love with her, and wanted to know if she felt the same way. If she had written about him, the way he had about her.

She hung her head. “We weren’t friends, Ash. We are now. And I’m glad for that. But we weren't when you bought this book.”

“I wish we had been. I wish I’d been brave enough to know you the way I know you now. 4 years ago. Hell, in high school even.”

“Me too,” she whispered, a tear of regret sliding down her cheek. A decade’s worth of pent up feelings filled the air between them and she still wasn’t brave enough to break through it.

She wasn’t sure when he had crossed the room to her, his fingers hooking under her chin to guide her face to look up at him. “But I know you now. And I can’t make up for lost time, but I can make sure we don’t waste anymore.”

“Yeah,” she nodded, more tears sliding down her face as her heart broke in her chest. 10 years worth of longing to only have him halfway. She supposed it was better than not having him at all, but the pain stung all the same. “Friends?” Her voice cracked and she visibly winced as the word rolled off her tongue.

Ashton shook his head. “No. I, uh- I don’t think I can do that.”

“But you-” Her lip started to quiver, so she bit it harshly, averting her gaze.

“Look at me,” he coaxed, his thumb rubbing along her cheekbone. “I meant that I can’t be friends with you because I’m past that point. When I say I don’t want to waste anymore time, I mean I don’t want to waste it by trying for anything less than what I really want.”

“And what do you want?”

“You.”

“You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to hear you say that,” she breathed in relief.

He reached over to grab the book, waving it in front of her face. “4 years give or take?” he teased lightly, dimples indenting in his cheeks.

“Longer than that,” she admitted, her entire face warm with her confession.

“Oh?” he continued to tease with a bemused smile.

“Ash,” she redirected, stretching upwards to intertwine her fingers behind his neck. “Shut up, and kiss me.”

Ashton didn’t need to be told twice.

“Oh, looks like you two finally figured it out,” Michael said from the doorway, making the couple jump apart. “Oh, no. Don’t stop on my account. Just gonna squeeze by ya, and get these cups…” He made a show of tiptoeing by them to gather the glasses.

“Michael!” Danielle hissed, stomping into the room and dragging her boyfriend out by the arm.

“Ah, young love!” Michael marvel, allowing himself to get towed out of the room. “Kinda makes you wanna fuck, huh?”

“Jar!”

Michael was already digging into his pocket. “Worth it!”

__

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[skelebonecentral]

Hothouse Rose chapter 4

your first day at your new home comes to a close and your new life begins!

(words under cut)

Charm just nodded as his brother explained what had happened when he’d visited with the human, and what he’d heard Spice do. “Well, I did tell you that humans are much more reserved than we’d assumed, brother.”

“but that much? I mean, I knew they wouldn’t be thrilled with my work but that kind of shock and disgust? I know you like them but they seem way too judgmental to me,” Sugar was worried. It was one thing for his cousins who lived here to be confused by his work, they’d still let him stay and they liked him already. But this human was an unknown factor and even if Papyrus loved them, they were still possibly bad for the rest of them…well, except Sans. Sans was clearly mooning after them already.

“Sugar, dear brother,” Charm smiled, “they already love Papyrus. And Papyrus has made it very clear that while we’re confusing to him, he cares for us. Sans cares for us. And the human, while very reserved, is reasonable and can be eased into acceptance of how we do things. We just need to take it slow, as hard as that can be for you.” He was almost laughing. His brother was just so impatient sometimes.

Huffing, Sugar sprawled out on Charm’s bed, “but it’s going to be so awkward. It was bad enough that first little while with our cousins and now we have to do it again? with a human with all kinds of hang ups? You know what they told boa?”

“I do. They’re entirely correct, too, but they also said they don’t understand the mindsets of those people who would hate us for what we are. Their whole energy is in flux right now, after all, because of that trauma of losing their home. Give them time, Sugar. They’ll learn to love us, I just know it.” Charm let himself lay over the bed, ending up with his head on his brother’s chest. “and remember, even if no one else loves you, I do.”

“I know, bro,” Sugar took a deep breath, then sighed, “yeah. okay. we’ll try to do this slow and steady, like you like it.”

“Right.”

--

Boa stood outside his brother’s door, “Please? The party isn’t until eight, so you have two whole hours where it’s just us and the human. You can even just meet them then take your dinner back, but they’re very fun.”

There’s silence behind the door, then it cracks open a bit, “and they’re my age?”

“Yes,” Boa smiles, “Almost exactly! They’re two years younger than Papyrus, he told me so. Also, they really like some of those 80’s movies you do. The one with the…the fellow in tights with the big blond wig? They bought a shirt of that!”

“Labyrinth?” the door opens more, a skull peering out with soft orange lights in the sockets, “That’s…promising. Um….and you’ll be there, right?”

That made Boa’s smile fall, “No, I have to work on a commission. But Whip and Papyrus will be there, and Sans. Maybe Spice, too, if he’s not too upset about botching his introduction.”

Analyzing movements of the eye lights, then he spoke, “okay. I’ll meet them as long as Papyrus is there.”

“Oh thank you, Sweet-pea!” Boa clapped happily, “They’re so nice, they yelled at someone who yelled at me! And he was a big scary man, too!”

A small laugh, “oh? well…that does boost them up in the list of people I’d be okay talking to.”

“Good.” Boa’s expression softens, “Because I really want you to find a friend. You deserve to have someone to count on besides me.”

--

“HELLO, DEAR DATEMATE!”

You look up and jump to your feet, flinging your arms open to hug Papyrus as he strides into your room. “Papyrus! Welcome back!”

Feet off the ground, you are swung lightly back and forth as he hugs back, then set right and beamed at, “AND I SEE YOU TOOK THE INITIATIVE TO FIND MY TEXTBOOKS TO STUDY! I’M VERY PROUD OF YOU FOR THAT! DID YOU MEET ALL THE OTHERS YET?”

“No,” you sigh, “and I don’t think my meeting with Sugar or Spice went well. I messed up with Sugar and I got too flustered and upset Spice so…”

“OH.” Papyrus frowns, but pats your head, “IT’S ALRIGHT. SPICE IS ALWAYS ON EGGSHELLS AROUND NEW PEOPLE, SO HE PROBABLY OVERREACTED. I KNOW IT IS A BIT WORRYSOME IF YOU DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOUR CRYING WHEN FLUSTERED, SO IT MIGHT HAVE SPOOKED HIM!”

“Yeah…sorry.”

“DON’T BE! NOW WE MUST GO DOWNSTAIRS FOR DINNER AND YOU CAN MEET THE OTHER TWO. MAYBE. SWEET-PEA TENDS TO EAT IN HIS ROOM A LOT SO I DON’T KNOW.”

Taking his arm, you let him lead you down the stairs and smiled as you saw Sans waiting for you by a door to the right of the stairs. “oh, heya. we got the other two you haven’t met yet here. and spice. But uh…he’s in a mood so he probably won’t talk.”

“That’s my fault. I got flustered and…well…”

“oh. gotcha. He’s not used to humans leaking,” Sans grinned as Papyrus glared at him.  He could feel that this would lead to many plumbing based puns later.

The door was opened, and you went in with Papyrus, being directed to the seat between him and Sans. It was a pretty long table, long enough for nine people easily, probably ten if you stretched it, and made of some dark stained wood with curling curved feet on the table itself and the chairs that matched it.

Although, the table was only so interesting when there was someone dressed like a dominatrix with a white scarf sitting at it.

He was tall, as tall as Papyrus if not taller, and sitting next to Spice near one end of the table. On seeing you, he stood up and stalked over. “I SEE. SO YOU ARE THE ONE PAPYRUS GUSHES OVER AND WHO’S GOT SANS ALL FLUTTERY.”

Sans chokes and coughs, turning blue as you give him a raised eyebrow. You’d talk about this later, but for now you just nod.

“WELL, I AM WHIP, THE INDOMINABLE AND TERRIFYING, AND I DO HOPE YOU LIVE UP TO THE HYPE. I TELL YOU,” he leaned over, the black leather of his outfit hugging his bright red ectobody closely and showing every taught movement of false muscle, “IF YOU TRY ANYTHING-“

“nope.” Sans got up and stood next to your seat, “whip, I did that already. threatening people isn’t allowed in this house. Nobody is doing anything wrong, and there’s no need for that. I get you’re used to being in charge, but this isn’t your house. It’s mine.”

His hand on your shoulder was warm and steady, and you were surprised when Whip backed off instantly. Wow, how many cut outs were in the side of that weird one-piece suit? It had no arms, and ended in shorts, but his boots and gloves matched.

“UGH. FINE. BESIDES, I DON’T NEED YOU AND ALL THE BLEEDING SOULS AROUND HERE ON MY CASE IF I UPSET THEM.” He sat back down, “BUT I STAND BY MY OBJECTION TO THEIR PRESENCE!”

Ah. So he was the one who didn’t want you here.

But that meant..

You look at Spice, and decide to do something, “I’m sorry if I worried you earlier, Spice. I just cry when I get really flustered; I wasn’t actually mad or anything.”

Spice sat up ramrod straight where he’d been leaned over the table grumbling to himself. “O-oh? so ya were just all flustered?”

“Yeah,” you nod and smile to make sure you reassure him, “so are we good now? I wanted to make sure you knew you didn’t do anything wrong.”

He seems very relieved, his grimace turning into a real smile, “oh yeah. yeah, baby doll, we’re good. thanks for clearin’ the air.”

Whip is glaring at you, but he elbows Spice, who winces and glares back at him.

The only other person at the table is across from you, and he’s been quiet. He’s wearing what looks like a hoodie with the hood up, but it’s cut off just before the end of his ribcage. Papyrus has started serving the dinner (it’s some kind of spicy chicken pasta, and you’re quite excited about it) and answers the question you weren’t prepared to ask yet, “SWEET-PEA, DO YOU WANT ME TO PUT A WRAP OVER YOUR PLATE SO YOU CAN GO UPSTAIRS?”

“n-nah, pap. Thanks,” his voice was soft, nervous, but had a small laugh in it. A tenor, this one, like Papyrus, Boa, Charm, and Whip. “I uh…kind of promised my bro I’d try to talk with the human, since we’re the same age.”

“Oh?” you perked up, and it also made Spice and Whip take notice. “It’s nice to meet you, Sweet-pea. Your brother really helped me out today.”

He looked up, and you saw a shy smile in the slight light of his blushing orange magic, “ehehe, the way he put it, it sounded like you helped him more. thank you, for keeping my big brother safe.”

Nodding, you set into your dinner. Papyrus and Sans were bantering as usual, and after a moment or two you got in on it as well. Spice and Whip would talk occasionally, but only amongst themselves, and Sweet-pea just observed.

After a while, you were done eating, but you didn’t want to just get up and leave. “Hey, Sweet-pea?”

He jumped, but looked your way, “yeah?”

“What do you like to do? Since we’re in the same house, I want to know how to have fun with all my housemates.”

Spice snickered, but got elbowed by his brother again, and Sweet-pea seemed relieved, “mostly I draw. I um…I design clothes, th-the ones my bro wears and me, too. uh…bro asked you for your measurements, right?”

“Oh, yeah he did. That was so you could work with them?”

He nodded, “never had to design for a human before. Neat challenge…nyehehe…”

Oh stars, he was so cute. That quiet laugh, the reluctance to talk, creative and shy, oh it was beyond endearing.

“Well, knowing that, I’ll be happy to let him or you measure me tomorrow. I’ll probably spend the majority of the day trying to just get used to the house but whenever you two are ready, I’ll cooperate.” Boa had already won your trust, and knowing this reclusive darling was his brother made you drop all your guards.

Papyrus seemed curious, and asked, “WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’LL MAKE FOR THEM, SWEET-PEA? THEY ARE A MORE CONSERVATIVE PERSON THAN YOUR USUAL DESIGNS GO FOR.”

He waved a hand, “o-oh I get that. uh….i kind of wanted to see if I could do that? make a more…more human friendly design. Maybe something dignified? Or a, um, a fancy gown? Suit? I’m not sure yet.”

He was done with his food, too, and as he got more nervous, he stood, “and that’s all the spoons I’ve got. See ya.” And he vanished like Sans did.

“Oh! He can shortcut, too!” You realize you sound stupid, but it just surprised you.

“so can me’n sugar,” Spice said, smirking a bit. “Can’t wait ta see what ya think when I just show up.”

“Probably that you’re showing off,” you answer honestly, “but that’s okay. I’m probably going to try and show off, too, since we’re just getting to know each other.”

He got thrown off, you could tell the way his smile faultered, but it came back softer, “fine by me, baby doll.”

“SPICE, I DON’T UNDERSTAND YOUR NICKNAME FOR THEM,” Papyrus was struggling, and you let him finish his question. “WHAT ABOUT THEM IS LIKE EITHER A BABY OR A DOLL? THEY ARE AN ADULT REAL HUMAN?”

“oh, easy. They’re cute, an’ young, an’ pretty. term of endearment, paps,” Spice handled it smoothly, giving a much nicer smile than he had all night, “sorry for confusin’ ya.”

“OH, NO, YOU ARE QUITE ACCURATE ON ALL THOSE COUNTS!” Papyrus beamed at you, and you shot a grateful look to Spice before squeezing Papy’s hand. “ALSO, FOR ME AND YOUR BROTHER, THEY ARE VERY SMALL AND THUS EVEN MORE ADORABLE!”

“not that small,” Sans says, playing at a pout before snickering. “but it’s true, compared to you, everybody is doll sized.”

Whip got up and walked to the doorway, “YOU’RE ALL INFURIATING! BROTHER, COME TALK TO ME WHEN YOU’VE WISED UP TO THIS INVADER!” He then stalked away, letting you see the spikes on the backs of his boots and gloves.

Spice groaned and got up, “sorry ‘bout him. he’s…well, gettin’ used ta other folks is gonna take him some time. barely got comfy with just us bone heads before you got here, baby doll. It’s okay.”

“Alright, if you say so,” you murmur, still worried. You hadn’t wanted to upset anybody.

Spice took a shortcut and left, and that meant it was just you and the two brothers you knew best.

“welp, I’m gonna- hck!”

Sans had tried to leave but gotten caught by his shirt collar by Papyrus. “OH NO, YOU’RE STAYING AND TALKING ABOUT THAT.”

“talking about what?” he asked meekly, and you leveled him with your stare.

“About Whip saying you were all fluttery about me.”

Sans’ skull turned blue as he was set back in his seat, “I’m working with Dr. Kevin about it, I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to start crushing…” He was curled in on himself, blue magic beading on his skull.

“SANS, WHY ARE YOU SORRY?” Papyrus blinked at him, “Y/N IS AMAZING, IT’S NOT SURPRISING YOU’D FIND THEM AS WORTHY OF YOUR LOVE AND ADORATION. YOU COULD HAVE JUST TOLD US AND WE’D TALK ABOUT IT.”

You look at Papyrus, very surprised. Most men you’d known in the past would be outraged if their brother admitted to having a crush on their date. But Papyrus’ next words dig you in even deeper in confusion. “AFTER ALL, IT’S NOT LIKE WE CAN’T COME TO SOME SORT OF AGREEMENT ON SCHEDULING IF THEY LIKE YOU BACK.”

“uh…that might be how it would work underground, pap,” Sans is looking pretty dejected and lost, “but I did the research, polyamory isn’t exactly encouraged up here. humans like monogamy.”

Oh. OH. This was a culture thing and Sans was trying to push his own feelings away because of it. Hell no.

“Sans, I…well, I’ve never tried a polyamory situation before, but I’m not opposed to it? I’m not sure I can address this fully right now, with everything going on, but we can certainly talk about it more when…when I’m not freshly moved in?” You smile, even though you know you probably look kind of dazed. You are dazed, a bit, so that’s okay.

Both the boys look at you, surprised, then they both smile. Papyrus is all brightness as always, and Sans looks so relieved, “that’s fine. that’s more than fine, it’s better than I ever expected. Thank you.”

“SEE? I TOLD YOU, THEY’RE THE BEST!” Papyrus hugs you, but whispers in your ear, “thank you for being open to this. I know it’s not the human norm.”

You just nod and hug back, and Sans gets up. “okay. I used like….all my energy for the night. I’m going to bed.” He waves, then shortcuts away.

“Do you want me to stay and help you clean up?” you ask, and Papyrus lets you go and shakes his head.

“NOPE! GO TO YOUR ROOM AND I’LL COME BY AT EIGHT TO HAVE SOME FUN BEFORE YOU GO TO SLEEP.”

You nod and get up, kissing his head, “And you do know I love you and that won’t change? Ever?”

“YES! AND THE SAME GOES FOR ME, BUT ABOUT YOU!”

Reassured, you go upstairs and settle in your room. Good grief, what a night. What a day, in fact, but at least it can’t get any bigger.

--

You are entirely wrong about it not getting bigger.

Papyrus suggests you come with him to the living room at eight for movies, and you agree, but end up finding a lot of your family and several of your monster friends there. Streamers are all over, there’s balloon inflated with gravity magic so they float, and a banner that says “WELCOME HOME!” on it.

Sans, looking very tired, waves at you from one of the sofas after everyone yells ‘surprise!’ at you when you come in. “I really am tired, but this was already planned so…”

You sit by him and kind of look around. Frisk runs up and signs at you, “It’s about time you moved in with them! How are you supposed to be lovey-dovey with Papyrus if you’re in different houses?!”

“Frisk,” you groan, hiding in Sans’ shoulder since Papyrus is busy chatting with Charm (he and Boa seem to have been in on it) “Please. You’re being too cute again.”

They grin, then sign to Sans, “And you, you should hug them more. I promise humans are really soft to hug!”

He chuckles and gives you a small squeeze, making you smile, “fine. don’t need to tell me twice.” Bother Frisk and their matchmaking prowess!

Satisfied, they skip off, and Undyne comes over. Her red ponytail is tied lower than normal and she’s actually just in a normal white t-shirt and jeans tonight. You’re surprised the denim goes so well with her blue skin. “Yo! So you burned your house down, too! Haha, I knew you’d get enough passion in there eventually.”

“It wasn’t passion, Undyne. Papy and I weren’t even home when it happened,” you say, and she scoffs.

“You guys are so lame! Alphys and I-“

“tmi, undyne,” Sans says, letting you go. “and don’t let my cousins hear you or they’ll give you lessons. I’m serious.”

“Fufufufufu, your cousins. Those guys are a riot. I love them,” Undyne grins, “But anyway, I’m glad you and Papyrus are safe, punk. And now Alphys and I can bet over when you’re getting married instead of just moving in!”

“Noooo,” you blush and cover your face. “You’re a terrible friend! Horrible! Bad! Why do I like you?”

“Cause I’m awesome, duh.”

Thankfully, Undyne’s wife comes over and tugs on her sleeve, “L-leave them alone, Undyne. It’s supposed to be a party for them to feel b-better, not worse.” She was a sweet little yellow lizard monster, reminding you of a dinosaur sometimes, with glasses and wearing a black dress with white polka dots. Her name was Alphys. “Sorry, Y/n, a-also, um, Papyrus gave me your computer for restoration. Don’t worry. I’ve had a lot of practice getting smoke residue out of electronic. Haha…mostly my own.”

“Thank you so much, Alphys,” you smile at her, so grateful for ANY reassurance your life might go back to normal sooner rather than later. “I know you’ll do a great job. Anybody who deals with MTT on a regular basis has to have a lot of patience for electronic nonsense.”

She giggles and nods, “Well, h-he is my bestie, but you’re right.”

Papyrus finally comes back and plops next to you on the couch, handing you a cup of punch and one of your favorite cookies, hand made by your mom. “YOUR PARENTS ARE THRILLED THAT WE ARE BOTH SAFE AND HAPPY. THEY’RE STAYING AT A HOTEL, BUT THEN THEY’RE HELPING YOU REPLACE MORE STUFF TOMORROW.”

“And they didn’t tell me this themselves because?”

“THEY WANT YOU TO NOT GET TOO EMOTIONAL SINCE YOU’RE RECOVERING FROM A TRAUMA AND FEEL LIKE THEM CODDLING YOU WOULD DO THAT.”

“Well, when you’re right, you’re right. I’d be crying as soon as I saw them.”

Sans is snoring, leaning against you, and you just feel good about that. When you first met, you’re pretty sure he would have been as awake and alert as possible around you, but now he’s loosely got hold of your arm and is snoozing away on your shoulder. And he apparently had feelings for you, too. Huh. Well, you can’t say he isn’t cute, because he is.

“YOU KNOW,” Papyrus looks around and you spot your parents trying to keep their distance, “EVERYONE HERE WAS VERY CONCERNED ABOUT YOU. SANS TOLD OUR UNDERGROUND FRIENDS AND I TOLD YOUR FAMILY SINCE YOU WERE TOO UPSET TO. THIS ROOM IS FULL OF PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU.”

You nod, taking his hand. He leans over and nuzzles into your hair. “AND ISN’T THAT WONDERFUL?”

It’s overwhelmingly wonderful.

--

It wasn’t a long party, since it was late, but everyone except your parents and housemates had left to go home by eleven. Still, you’d ended up with gifts that made you embarrassed. New copies of your favorite books, used copies of games you liked that had been melted in the living room, a few pairs of shoes (you’d forgotten to buy those at the store so you liked these), and a box from your parents that contained a package of your favorite candies, a new weighted blanket, and your favorite childhood plush.

You’d thanked them, getting big hugs before they left, and sighed. The boys were cleaning up (except Sans, he was still sleeping on the sofa) and Charm came over as you held up your old friend.

“Well, that is an adorable plushie.” He smiled at you and looked them over, “And well loved, obviously. I’m guessing that’s from your family?”

“Yep. This little fella was my best friend as a child. I still love them very much,” you cuddled the toy close and took a deep breath. Having it did help you feel more grounded and secure, as did the weighted blanket. You’d be sleeping with that on tonight.

“Good, then you have a tangible signal that you are loved and supported.” He gestured, “Shall I walk you to your room, dear housemate?”

You pick up your package, even if Papyrus notices and takes the heavy blanket for you, and let Charm lead you up. Boa brings up the rear, carrying the rest of your presents either in his arms or with his magic.

Opening your door makes the exhaustion hit you, and you quickly go to the wardrobe after dropping your fluffy buddy off on the bed. Your various gifts are placed around the room, and Papyrus shoos everyone else out after they’re done. You do get a goodnight from each of them, though, and you like the injection of happiness that gives you.

“AND YOU KNOW WHERE THE BATHROOM IS?” Papyrus asks as you before he leaves.

“I found it earlier, thanks for asking, though,” you blow him a kiss and he giggles.

“ALRIGHT THEN. SLEEP WELL, LOVE, AND I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU IN THE MORNING.”

The door shuts softly, and you change into your pj’s. The house is quiet, and you manage to do your routine in the bathroom before coming back and going to sleep. It’s not easy, of course, but you manage it after a while of lying in bed and letting your thoughts run in circles.

--

Living in the skeleton’s house was…interesting to say the least.

During the weekdays, of course, you were out most of the time. Classes, work, various appointments, all of it took up time. But the evenings and weekends were quite hectic.

As soon as you got home at six, everybody was sitting down for dinner, if they were home. You could never really pin down any of the cousins’ schedules, but Spice was always home, as was Sweet-pea.

You and Spice had gotten to the point of ‘uneasy truce’ in your interactions because you were both awkward and nervous, trying not to step on each other’s toes, and not sure how to interact. That was okay, it was much better than when you ran into Whip and he made angry huffing sounds and rushed off in the opposite direction.

Sweet-pea was in his room almost all the time, except meals. You saw very little of him but made sure to say hello and be happy to see him when he did come out. That seemed to do well, as you’d noticed he came out for more meals than just dinner now.

Boa was also usually home but would go out to pick up more fabric or do grocery runs with Papyrus and Charm. Sans was out about the same as you, as was Charm, and Papyrus was out less frequently simply because, as he put it, “WHY DO I WANT TO STAY OUT IF YOU’RE AT HOME?”

You can’t say that doesn’t flatter you. You also can’t say the little hand touches and shy smiles you were getting from Sans didn’t make you blush and beam for several minutes afterward. It was one thing for your darling Papyrus to do it, that gave you a rush of excitement and affection, but for quiet, self-contained Sans to be making that effort to remind you that he cared…well, you enjoyed it immensely.

Papyrus and you had been asked to come in and discuss this relationship business by Sans’ therapist, and you…honestly had been a bit floored.

“Are you absolutely certain this is your choice?” Dr. Kevin had asked you, a forty something year old man with greying red hair. His brown eyes were concerned, “He’s told me about you. You’re a kind, selfless sort of person. I just don’t want you to overwhelm yourself, taking on a significant other with depression on top of one with autism.”

“Wait, Papyrus is autistic?” you hadn’t known that. “If that’s what your concern is, I don’t think we’ll have a problem. I kind of already assumed Sans would still be living with us forever anyway? I can’t imagine separating them.”

“Oh, so he hadn’t told you that. Sans told me and I thought it was common knowledge.”

“No, Papyrus never mentioned it, but looking back I can see some signs. But he’s just…Papyrus. I like him, whatever that includes, and it’s much the same for Sans. That first hurdle was a doozy, but he’s more than shown he’s not only improving himself, but that he cares about me. He’s helped me more times than I care to count on homework, on safety tips, on all kinds of little things, and then this fire event? Paying for the hotel the first night and letting me into his home…he didn’t even want to tell me yet, his cousin outted him and…” You look up and the doctor is trying to cover up a smile.

“Okay, I get it. He was right about you being very powerful in your opinions, too. I just want what’s best for everyone in this, and it seems like you feel the same as Sans does. That trying this out is the way forward. I just had to make sure for his sake and yours,” Dr. Kevin (you can’t pronounce his last name and he told you not to bother with it) gets up and gestures to the door, “Now I’ll talk with Papyrus and that’ll be that. Thank you so much for coming in, and for being there to support Sans. He’s a very fun person to talk to, even in my position.”

You nod, feeling good, and leave the room.

When it was all said and done, the three of you were called in together and Dr. Kevin seemed very pleased, “Well, considering everything, I’m really proud of what’s going on here. Mutual love and respect, open mindedness, and a healthy dose of communication. Even if it was forced,” He raises an eyebrow at Sans, who blushes. “Nah, I wouldn’t have recommended the timing either, but it worked out well and that’s because you three care about each other deeply and genuinely. Yes, the relationships are morphing a bit, but the foundations are solid, so I say go build on it.”

A glowing review, you think, and Sans asked as the three of you drove home in Papyrus’ new car, “so uh…d-does that mean we’re officially a polycule?”

Papyrus breathes hard through his nose, “SINCE THAT’S SOMEWHAT OFFCIAL TERMINOLOGY, I’LL LET THE PUN PASS, BUT YES, I THINK IT DOES.”

You nod and look around at where Sans is in the back seat, holding your hand out for him. “Wow, how come Dr. Kevin lets me have two boyfriends?”

Sans laughs and Papyrus groans in amused exasperation, but you’re happy and you know he and Sans are, too. Especially as Sans grips your hand with his pink mittens and squeezes with a lovestruck haze to his eye lights.

--

“Color me surprised, okay.” Sugar held up his hands, grinning happily.

“why? You lose your hue?” Sans chuckled as he was cleaning the soot off part of the machine.

“no, it’s just that I never expected you to express your feelings plainly enough to get anywhere with y/n. they’re not the most open person in the world when it comes to romance.”

Tilting his head, Sans put down his work, “what’s that mean?”

“I’m saying they’ve been with your brother for over a year and I haven’t heard a peep about anything other than dating. Not even adult dating, like, little kid crush dating,” Sugar lifted a brow bone, “sans, you realize they aren’t even banging, right?”

“I do, but it’s not like I wanna think about that,” the blush on his cheekbones was tempered by the irritated quirk of his smile, “why does that matter? More to life than sex, y’know.”

Sugar sighed, “look, I just don’t want you or papyrus to get heartbroken if they end up not sticking around. as far as I’ve known, getting intimate is a bonding thing. if they aren’t willing to bond with you, they aren’t gonna stay. This might be some kind of self-discovery fling for them or something.”

Sans is quiet for a minute, looking Sugar over before going back to his cleaning, “sugar, if it was a fling, they wouldn’t be so careful with us. They wouldn’t have gone to that meeting with my therapist and if they did, he wouldn’t have liked what he heard. I trust dr. kevin with everything; he knows about this machine, and us, and everything I’ve been through. Gaster included. He wouldn’t see someone pretending to love me and give his blessing.”

“but he’s human, and they are, too, it could be-“

“sugar,” Sans sighed, “look, I get where you’re coming from. I was there, for a long long time,” he looked up and smiled a little more genuinely, “but trying to avoid every possible bad scenario leads to you standing in one place, never moving, forever.”

Sugar held his own arms and looked conflicted.

“and, y’know, for all we know, y/n might be ace. Did ya consider that?”

“no,” Sugar let his skull droop, “but I sure hope not. Boa’s getting really attached to them, and my brother isn’t far off. They’d be pretty crushed if the only way they know to really show everything they feel is off the table.”

“oh…” that didn’t sound like a pleased response.

“you do know friends with benefits is a big thing in our universes, right? how else would my brother know half the things he needed to for the guard?” Sugar laughed humorlessly. “seriously, though, sans, that’s something we need to know sooner rather than later. the only ones who could ask are you and pap. Think about it.”

He walked out, and Sans groaned before thunking his skull onto the workbench. Welp, there went all those fluttery ‘new relationship’ feelings.

--

Telling Charm you didn’t have an exercise routine had been a mistake, especially with Papyrus and Boa in the room.

“You…don’t want to take care of your body?” he asked.

“What? Of course I do, I just….” You sigh, “Sweating is so disgusting, and my back hurts pretty bad if I try because of how stressed it makes me.”

“WORKING OUT IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN, NOT STRESSFUL,” Papyrus put down the dishes he was drying, “THAT’S WHY IT’S BEEN SO HARD FOR ME TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO FOR THEM. I’VE BEEN WRACKING MY SKULL ABOUT IT SINCE WE MET PRACTICALLY.”

“Are there any activites you like, pumpkin?” Boa asked. He’d been calling you pumpkin since the welcome party, when your mom had been showing the boys your baby pictures, like when you dressed as a pumpkin for your first Halloween.

“I…like swimming? You don’t get hot, you don’t sweat, and it doesn’t stress me about how much…” you blushed. You hated feeling your fat move when you exercised. The jiggle and bounce just made you nauseous to think about. Even exercising alone didn’t decrease the revulsion.

Papyrus hugged you and made a small grunt. He knew you hated parts of yourself and did his best to stop those thoughts as soon as possible.

“Well, have you tried Yoga? Like, seriously tried it, not just taken a look,” Charm’s browbones were lowered and he was looking intently at you with his skull in his hands.

“No. I can’t exactly afford classes, especially with my freaking house dying in a fire.”

Boa snorted and Charm grinned, “Well, who said you’d have to pay me? I only take money for things while at work. Yoga is what I do for fun. Well, that and gymnastics, but you need equipment for that.”

He hopped up and clapped his hands, “Im going to get my mats and I want all four of us in the backyard in sportswear in ten minutes!” With that, he rushed away up the stairs.

“THIS IS EXCITING!” Papyrus squeezed you a bit, “I’M GOING TO GET DRESSED! OR RE-DRESSED!”

Boa just flung his shirt over his head, revealing a halter top underneath and mussing his carefully arranged purple scarf, “I’m already dressed!”

Well, he was wearing tights today, so you supposed you were the only one not running in glee from the dining room. You trudged upward, getting out the tight-fitting crop top and leggings you had bought for such a purpose. You’d expected to maybe wear these in secret as you tried, and failed, once again to get in better shape.

Well, at least Papyrus would be there. And Boa and Charm always called you lovely and beautiful, so you were pretty confident they wouldn’t laugh at your rolls. Even if your mind was hissing at you otherwise.

But you made your way out with a deep sigh. Spice was in the hall, but he blushed and hid back in his room quickly. Yep, still dancing around each other. Okay.

Heading down the stairs and through the kitchen, you open the door leading to the back yard to a comfy fall afternoon, the currently empty pool covered by a grey tarp foremost in your vision while the boys have taken places on the deck portion of the backyard, having various colorful mats on the ground in a formation with Charm at the front, and Boa and Papyrus on either side of an empty mat.

Charm is very excited, wearing a black top that connected around his neck and hand no other straps, as well as bright blue leggings. “Okay! We’re all here, so I’m going to start at the beginning. We’ll spend the first five minutes on breathing. It’s important to get your breath even and steady, even for us skeletons, because the regular rhythm is calming and helps your muscles relax. Or your magic, in our case.”

He sat down, and you followed along with Papyrus and Boa. “Sitting like this is one of the most simple poses, look at how my feet are under my knees? Do that.” You rearranged yourself, feeling a little unbalanced. “Now pull your back up straight and tall, as much as you can comfortably.” Ooh, you felt some popping in your spine. “And we will breathe with a count of four in, hold seven, out eight.”

He started the count, going through it about three times before starting to just talk to you all like an instructor, “Now, close your eyes and focus on nothing but my voice and your own breathing. How it gathers low inside you, then pushes out the tension you’re holding. Your muscles will respond as this tension eases, slowly relaxing into their natural resting state. Isn’t that nice? It feels so much better to relax.”

Sure, he was right, it did feel good, but you also had a lot on your mind. You didn’t know if your underwear was visible through your leggings, you didn’t know if there were bugs around, and your brain kept up a negative dialogue about how stupid you looked and how you weren’t going to stick with this even with the help of the boys.

“Reader?” Charm’s voice drew you out of your spiral, “You had a strange expression just now. Are you alright?”

“Y-yeah, just…I feel silly and it’s not helping my inner monologue,” you feel embarrassed but better that someone noticed than you suffering in silence, you suppose.

“OH. WELL, YOU DON’T LOOK SILLY TO ME,” Papyrus says, “IN FACT, YOU LOOK QUITE FETCHING IN YOUR EXERCISE GEAR. THEY’RE VERY COLORFUL.” You’d specifically picked the most appealing and bright colors and patterns when you chose this outfit. You wanted to at least like what you were wearing if you were going to hate what you were doing wearing it.

Boa looked over and nodded, “It could be better fitted, but your personality is really on display and that’s a wonderful thing! You look ready to have fun and care for yourself at the same time.”

Charm agreed heartily, “As your friend and instructor, I have to say you look wonderful in your outfit, and you look perfectly normal as someone who is starting out. And as for your inner voice,” he makes a cartoonishly annoyed face, “it needs to stop badmouthing my friend or I’ll give it my two g about manners!”

You laughed, loving the enthusiasm, and that seemed to please all three. “Okay. I look normal then. Let’s keep going.”

“Right,” Charm shook himself a bit then closed his sockets, “Now we are going to try and do the breathing, but this time, we’ll focus on the balance in our backs.”

You spent the next half hour on the deck, listening to Charm lead all three of you through some simple poses. Honestly, it was the calmest you’ve ever felt when trying to exercise, simply because you had your sweetheart nearby and your two housemates who were quickly climbing the ranks in friendship with you. The yoga itself was not strenuous on your body like walking, or aerobics, or any other exercise regime you’d tried, and that combined with the calmer atmosphere of being with the people who genuinely liked and cared about you made it so much easier to not hate doing it.

It wasn’t your first choice in activity, no, and you weren’t exactly having ‘fun’ but you were neutral to it, and that was a huge improvement.

[5hfanfiction]

Camren: At First Sight (Chapter 2)

Trigger Warning: reference to alcoholism and self-harm 

-

When my clock beeped 8:00 AM, I ignored a pang of homesickness and raised myself onto my elbow, looking around the cabin. 

From the corner window, a small ray of light filtered through the blinds and landed on Lauren’s cheek. I smiled to myself when she rubbed her face sleepily, as though to brush it onto the floor. 

Ugh. Get it together. With a sigh, I climbed to my feet and stretched my arms above my head.  

Normani moaned. “Turn it off.”  

“What off?” I replied, bewildered, having already silenced the alarm clock. 

“The light,” she whined. “What time is it, anyway?”

Ally threw a pillow at her head. “Shhhhhh.” But she missed, of course, and only succeeded in knocking Dinah’s water bottle off her nightstand. 

“The fuck.”

I couldn’t contain my giggles at that, and Lauren, who had stretched her feet to the floor, caught my gaze. Her laughter sent a flash of warmth through my body even as I shivered in the cold air. 

“Are you two about done?” Normani complained.

I bit back my smile. “You can sleep if you want, but we’re due at breakfast in 45.”

Her eyes flew open. “Dibs on first shower!”

“Hell no,” Lauren replied, grabbing for her soap. “I’m going first.” 

“You sure about that, Lauren?” I smirked.

Dinah slammed the bathroom door shut, clicking the lock into place. We could hear her laughter even over the roar of the water. 

“How the hell did she—ugh, you could have warned me, Camz.” 

“Where’s the fun in that?” Camz. I smiled. It was going to be a good day.  

-

It was not a good day.  

As I stared into my bowl of spaghetti, Dinah patted my arm. “Don’t take it so hard. It’s practically her job.”

Our dancing coach was relentless. An hour into the practice, I lost count of how many times she shouted, “Again, Camila! With spunk!” By now, all the contestants knew my name.  

“I’m a singer, not a dancer,” I grumbled.

Normani blurted, “But if you’re going to perform—ow!”

When I glanced at Lauren, she raised her eyebrows innocently. I laughed in spite of myself.

“Report to Wing C in 10 minutes,” the loudspeaker crackled, making me jump. The cafeteria fell into a brief, anxious silence before erupting into commotion.

Ally wrung her hands. “This is it, guys.”

I groaned and dropped my fork. 

“Don’t worry, Mila,” Normani grinned. “No dancing.”

I rolled my eyes. “Singing for Simon and Demi isn’t any less scary.” I threw my uneaten pasta into the trash and followed Dinah into the hallway.

To my surprise, Lauren fell into step beside me. I was suddenly hyperaware of my body, my clothes, the way my shoes echoed on the tile floor. I tried to keep my cool. “You ready for this?” I asked bravely. 

“Better be. We’ve certainly practiced enough.” It was true. Between our partner rehearsals, we’d all had the chance to work with vocal coaches in preparation for our first X Factor challenge. 

“I mean… yeah. But where do we look when we’re singing? There’s only two of them! And we’re not even on a stage!” My nerves spilled into word vomit.   

Lauren laughed. “You’d rather a full audience? Just pretend you’re performing for your mom or dad, or something. Where do you look when you sing for them?”

“Uh,” I sighed. “Well. Actually, I only sang officially for them once, and I made them turn around and face the wall.” 

Lauren’s face split into a wide grin. “You’re joking.”

“Nope.”

“That’s hilarious. And adorable,” she chuckled. I willed my cheeks to stay pale. “But anyway, you are gonna have to make some eye contact.”

I grimaced. “Duh.”

“Just keep moving your eyes. Like—Demi, wall, Simon, Demi’s eyebrows, Simon’s nose—and so on.”

I giggled. “Weirdo.”

We took a seat in the hallway serving as the makeshift holding room. “Hey, you wanted advice,” Lauren smirked, crossing her legs. “At least I’ve sang to more than my parents’ backs.” 

I shook my head in mock despair. “Not helping.”

“Don’t worry, Camz.” She reached over and squeezed my hand, sending my heart into overdrive. “You’ve got this.”  

“Ms. Cabello?” An assistant called. “They’re ready for you.” Damn alphabetical order.  

The four girls—the girls I had known for less than 48 hours, who had no reason to be nice to me, let alone cheer me on—shouted their encouragement as I walked through the door. For that, I was so unbelievably grateful. 

-

Even as I willed my adrenaline to dissipate, I couldn’t help but analyze the performance, replaying each moment over in my head. My mattress creaked beneath my weight when I rolled onto my back and kicked my socks onto the floor. A few restless minutes passed.

“Screw it,” I finally muttered, tossing my blanket to the side. I threw a sweatshirt over my pajamas and stepped into the night air.

“Camila?” 

I jumped and squinted through the dark. “Lauren?” She was sitting on the porch steps, her head resting on the side of the staircase, a notebook in her lap. 

I hesitated, then walked forward, feeling my way to the stairs. “Mind if I sit?” 

“Sure,” came her reply. “You couldn’t sleep either?”

“Nope. There’s just…so much.”

She turned her head to look at me, but there wasn’t enough moonlight to read her expression. “Like what?” She murmured. 

I laughed self-consciously. “I don’t know. I can’t stop thinking about singing for Simon and Demi. And the dancing class fiasco. And I really—well, I really miss my mom,” my voice cracked. 

“Camz…come here.” She held out her arm, and I scooted into her side, burying my face in her pajama shirt. I couldn’t believe when my tears spilled over, soaking her collar. She stroked my hair, whispering soothing words, as I completely lost it. 

When I finally pulled away, I felt the absence of her warmth. “I’m sorry,” I managed, blushing. I wiped my eyes quickly, horrified with myself. “I—I guess I’m just really tired.” 

“No, I get it. Why do you think I’m out here?” She rubbed circles into my hand, and we sat in silence for some time, enjoying the sounds of the night.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” I whispered. 

She pushed her hand through her hair, and I couldn’t help but wish she still had her arm around my own. “I—I can’t. I mean—I write it all down. So I don’t have to.” 

My eyes strayed to the notebook on her lap. 

“But you know,” Lauren said suddenly, climbing off the steps. “I could help you with one of your problems.”

“Oh?” She pulled me to my feet. 

“The dance class. It wasn’t that you didn’t know what you were doing, you know. You just weren’t going for it. That’s why she got so mad.”

I sighed. “I guess.”

“Well, now’s your chance.”

Even though she couldn’t tell, I raised my eyebrows. “How so?”

She laughed quietly. “It’s pitch black. I can barely see a foot in front of me.”

“No way,” I grinned. “Just because there’s no one to watch…I still hate dancing.”

Before I could stop her, she grabbed my hands and spun me in a circle. “Lauren!” I half-laughed, half-whispered. “I’m going to fall!” 

“Come on, Camz.” She dropped my hands. “No one’s here. Remember the first step?” I saw her outline slide to the side, raise her arms above her head. 

I found myself copying her motion. “Good,” she whispered. “Don’t stop.”

We danced until the sun came over the horizon.  

-

*BONUS scene from Demi’s perspective <3

Demi pored a glass of wine with shaking hands. She shivered as she watched the red liquid leave the bottle, already anticipating the warmth that would spread down her throat when it touched her lips. 

With jerky movements, she forced herself away from the counter. She flipped the light switch off and closed her eyes. Sobs wracked her body, but even through her tears, she couldn’t stop herself from smelling the sweet wine. It filled the cabin like perfume, cloying and tempting and—

Demi knocked the glass off the counter and watched it shatter with grim satisfaction. But the liquid crept toward her, slipping across the wooden floor, as she stood, transfixed, helpless. When it lapped against her toes, she bent and dipped her finger into the red wine, lovingly, in a spooning caress… before pulling back, as though scalded, when a shard of glass pierced her skin.   

She was no stranger to blood. How many times had she let it spill willingly, relished the escape from thoughts that never stopped? But this pain sharpened her senses and pulled her from the wine-soaked haze. Demi lowed the finger that had drifted toward her mouth. Get out. Now. She grabbed for the cabin door and stumbled into the night. 

Deep gasps of air set Demi’s lungs on fire. It was cold, too cold. She began to walk aimlessly. Her toes had numbed by the time she heard the voices. 

“Lauren, I definitely can’t do that.”

Demi’s heart thumped into overdrive, and she hastily ducked behind a tree. She squinted. Through the darkness, she could see the outlines of two girls, silhouetted against the moon.

“Hmph. Yes you can, Camila. Like this.” Demi watched as the taller outline placed her hands on the smaller girls’ hips and moved them in slow circles. 

“Do you feel that?” 

“Yeah. I think I get it now.”

Demi smirked to herself when the taller outline didn’t immediately remove her hands. Realizing that her own hands were nearly frozen, Demi turned and headed back the way she came. She held her breath as she stepped over the puddle of wine on her floor, plugged her nose to keep the sickly odor from rousing her temptation. Her last thoughts were of liquid warmth.

-

Thanks so much for reading <3 More chapters are posted on Wattpad (@paigejv). Skip directly to chapter 3.0 :)

[jerztoaz]

OCTOBER 28, 2018 - “Sleepless nights”

Ugh, I absolutely hate fighting with you. I hate going to bed knowing that we’re on bad terms and that things haven’t been resolved. I toss and turn and replay the whole situation in my head over and over again. I re-read our texts and look more into each sentence, over analyzing each word and thinking about our fight all gotdamn night. 

I’ve been up wondering why I can’t just manage to tell you something and actually do it. No fuckin’ clue. You say I do it over and over again and you’re absolutely right and it’s not fair to you. I know I gave you a time so that we could Facetime and by falling asleep while watching Netflix, I didn’t commit to it. There’s so many factors, so many obstacles, so many variables that go against us in our relationship. Three of the factors include the distance, the varying time zones, and unfortunately the limited physical communication. I know it’s frustrating because in the last few days, we haven’t gotten a chance to really talk to each other and the one time that we setup a time to talk, I fall asleep. I know there’s been other times when I said I would do something and I’ve failed to do so. I don’t know if I just make excuses for myself, if I’m lazy, if I get distracted by something else, if I just don’t want to do it, if I’m just so gotdamn sleepy or whatever else, but NO MORE EXCUSES. I’m tired of hurting you and disappointing you and I’m sorry. It literally kills me to know that my actions are hurting you and that needs to stop. I am going to try my best to keep you in the loop and keep you informed if something happens or comes up that keeps me from doing whatever I said I would do. So even if it’s something small and very minimal like sending you things or texting you when I’m home, let me know that I didn’t do what I said I would do so that I can be more aware and fix it. Don’t just brush it off and let it go. TELL ME because I NEED TO KNOW so that I can be better.

Anyways, at the end of the day, one thing ALWAYS remains - I love you ... despite any fights, arguments, disagreements, and varying opinions we may have. I LOVE YOU. I know you’re not my enemy and I sure as hell don’t want to be yours. I know we’re still a work in progress and that we have to put in 5x more work because we’re in a long distance relationship, but sometimes, I just wish life would give us a break and make things easy, but if it was easy, what would it be worth, right?

[airoasis]

How to learn any language easily | Matthew Youlden | TEDxClapham

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/how-to-learn-any-language-easily-matthew-youlden-tedxclapham-2/

How to learn any language easily | Matthew Youlden | TEDxClapham

Translator: Hoa Pham Reviewer: Denise RQ learning a language can suppose a little bit like rocket science, something out of this world and out of attain for the great majority of us. This is not a notion, however, simply held by using many English monolinguals on our island. It is usually shared by a lot of our linguistic cousins additional afield, say, in the U.S. Or Australia. Let’s be honest: on the subject of learning languages or speaking them, we’re the form of people that likes to think we’re fluent in a large number of various languages such as Geordie, Kiwi, Cockney, or what about Canadian? Do not get me unsuitable. I am very, very pleased with my Mancunian heritage, however i wouldn’t suggest it is a separate language simply but. In any case, we don’t need subtitles once we are observing Coronation road, now do we? Although i can see you two pronouncing, "I do." (Laughter) yet, regardless of this, if you happen to had been to go the Channel, or say, if you are feeling moderately extra adventurous, pass the Severn Estuary into Wales, there you might to find that talking one more language or being bilingual is with ease a fact.But, there and additional afield, many are still convinced of the fact this is a lengthy, difficult, moderately painful, and dare I say, daunting task. In this room of one hundred folks, i’d wager that at least 15 different languages are spoken apart from English. Actually, the final census of 2011 revealed that a stunning 22% of Londoners – that’s 22%, one in 4, practically – speak yet another language at dwelling apart from English. I actually, while a Mancunian, speak approximately 20 languages, and of those, around half I converse fluently. And the question I get asked via persons probably the most is, "Why?" (Laughter) good, the answer, for me as a minimum, is as an alternative easy. I am convinced studying languages, any language per Se, is surely convenient. And that i wish to exhibit you how. As a linguist, a polyglot, and a lecturer, i know what it entails to be trained and learn a language.And probably the most greatest barriers we’re confronted when finding out are myths. And i definitely think that we need to debunk them. In an effort to consider these extra simply, I came up with the nice and friendly sounding acronym D.I.E. (Laughter) which funnily sufficient, should you write it out no longer pronounce, if you happen to write it out, it’s one of the most words for ‘the’ in German. Fable quantity one: learning a language is conveniently too tricky. I will by no means be equipped to communicate another language relatively just like the language I used to be born with. Technically, you’re now not born with a language. Anyone right here could have ended up, with say, eastern as our first language. We had been effectively surrounded or immersed in the language in general from an extraordinarily early age. There are individuals, however, available in the market – many of them, in fact – who began to be taught a language, the 2nd or might be even the 0.33, so much afterward in life. And guess what? They’re now wholly fluent in this language or these other languages even perhaps extra so than in their so-called mother tongue.Why is this? Since there is not any cutoff date in which you have got to have learned a different language. Consider about how many people who say, "Ugh! My kids are doing French in college. I relatively want them to turn out to be fluent. However I can’t, no means, it can be impossible. I must’ve conveniently paid extra attention once I was once at tuition." good, reviews expose that while youngsters most of the time are so much faster at selecting up a brand new language than folks older than them, it’s truely us – that you could just breathe as a sign of relief – it’s us, the adults, who’re extra powerful at studying them. Why is that this? Because now we have the expertise of learning. We know methods to gain knowledge of already. Myth number two: languages are with no trouble beside the point. I don’t have to learn a further language in any respect.And as we hear, and regrettably hear rather lots – I was once going to do in a cockney accent, but I won’t do it at all. I will spare myself the embarrassment of doing that – languages … Every body speaks English, anyway. Good, besides the obvious advantages of talking another language – for illustration, monetary advantages and mental advantages, i.E., better pay, extra job possibilities, maintaining us mentally match, and truly serving to to stave off neurological diseases similar to Alzheimer’s- there are real hidden gemstones we will realize once we converse yet another language. How about getting an upgrade in your hotel room, as was once lately the case with my uncle before going to Turkey on holiday? He asked me if I would send him over just a few phrases and greetings in the language that he might try out in the inn.Turns up, caught over this suitcase, throws out a few sentences in Turkish, and bam!, he’s given an improve on his resort room instantly. (Laughter) You would now not normally get an upgrade on your resort room. I are not able to promise you this. Nevertheless, i will be able to promise that you maybe simply perhaps, through an additional language, will meet the love of your existence. We all keep in mind Jamie from Love clearly finding out Portuguese for Aurlia. And correctly, virtually one in ten Brits is married to any individual who used to be born overseas. Moreover, the Guardian stated on research showing that individuals who are able to converse two languages or extra better adapt or are higher equipped at dealing with issues, that they’re better at multitasking and prioritizing tasks. That is obviously a so much sought-after ability in our day and age when anybody appeared to be glued to our telephones. I wonder how many humans now who’re looking at this shall be glued to their telephones, and how many are clearly going to bilingual? Myth number three: you must be an expat and be in a situation where the language is constantly spoken, even to simply get a snatch of the language.There is no damage in without difficulty packing up and moving to a village within the center of nowhere, nevertheless it’s no longer really vital. Now the satisfactory unknown: my brother and that i – i’ll depart you to make a decision who’s who; he is clearly my twin brother – my brother and that i at the same time being headquartered in Berlin, Germany, determined to undertake the undertaking of learning Turkish in simply seven days. We decided to undertake the challenge of studying Turkish in simply seven days in an effort to show what you are able to do with the aid of effectively putting your intellect to it. I am no longer saying we all need to be going available in the market and studying a language in every week nor that it is simply possible to be trained absolutely the whole thing there’s in this sort of quick house of time. I will guarantee you, it isn’t. Perfection isn’t the intention right here.The purpose, nonetheless, is to get as good as we very likely can in a detailed language, within the shortest time viable. This means to the dismay of university teachers all for the period of the globe, "Take shortcuts." The first-rate factor about these shortcuts is we can observe them to any language that we would like to be taught. And furthermore, they’re so simple, you perhaps left thinking at the finish, "Why did not I think of that?" So let’s take a look at these shortcuts. Quantity one: analyze the similarities, focal point on equivalent factors. As audio system of English, we already comprehend so much about different languages, given the fact that our language itself, almost, is a Germanic language with the wealth of influences and vocabulary from a multitude of specific languages as numerous as Latin, Hebrew, or Hindi. Doing this will likely help strengthen patterns in the language and in addition will aid us to guess the that means and formation of phrases and things that we don’t yet know. As you see on this slide, for example, we are able to see how closely associated English is to fellow different Germanic languages and even to languages that are, in this case, Romance languages, however that English is a Germanic language basically.Shortcut quantity two: hold it easy. In the beginning sight, you could consider you are studying a language that doesn’t have that so much in common with our possess, however through focusing on easy factors, we will be able to learn it so much speedily on the grounds that each language has convenient elements to it. Some languages simplest have two or three tenses. For example, you grow to be saying ‘I had,’ in this one form, for ‘I had,’i’ve had,’ and ‘I had had,’ and ‘i’m’ also can be ‘I might be’ and ‘i would be.’ In different circumstances, if we seem at, for example, German, we’ve a case of developed vocabulary that is derived from a couple of simple words or verbs.On this case, we’ve the verb ‘sprechen’ which is ‘to speak,’ which has now long gone on and lent itself to turn out to be ‘besprechen’ – to discuss, ‘entsprechen’ – to correspond, ‘versprechen’ and ‘absprechen,’ and many others, and so on. Shortcut quantity three: hold it imperative. Especially at the commencing of our process, we have got to ensure that it’s valuable to us. Not all people is learning German with a view to talk about business with colleagues in Berlin. Consider about this. As speakers of English, we have no idea every single phrase within the Oxford English Dictionary. So why will have to we worry about remembering every single phrase we come upon within the new language? We readily have got to make it critical to our own exact challenge right now. When it comes to learning a language, maybe the most important aspect is time. And by using time, i do not mean years upon years of unending studying as some men and women still prefer to feel. How long does it take to gain knowledge of a language? How about if I were to inform you that half-hour per day are a first-rate and effective begin? Thirty minutes – these are minutes all of us have.Be ten within the morning, ten in the afternoon, ten in the night, or half-hour in conveniently one go to be able to work, to tuition, to tuition, out in the evening, assembly friends, while we are on the train or bus. We all have all these minutes that we are able to commit to gain knowledge of. Moreover, by finding out for smaller intervals and general intervals, we will not suppose so overwhelmed via the language. And even better, studying for average periods signifies that it is more effective, considering chances are that if you’re studying for once a week or once a fortnight, by the time you next come to gain knowledge of, you’ll have already got forgotten what you initially realized. The purpose hence is to fit language studying into our day-to-day routines and now not the opposite direction around. And by means of doing this, there’s no motive why after with ease one month, you are not able to get through in your new language. These energetic forms of studying, we have got to compliment them with what i might like to refer to as passive varieties of learning.Having breakfast: change the radio on and listen to a station within the language, turn out to be accustomed to the tune of the language. The song is not going to handiest help you get used to the sounds, to the intonation, and to the rhythm however the words you can hear will also help you companion them; given that you know the songs, and you can be competent to partner them with these songs, hence expanding our vocabulary. Had a tough day? Deal with yourself to a television series or a movie within the language, and put subtitles on, in English, and then, others can join and watch with you as good. We all know how all people seems to be going crazy about this Scandinavian television crime series on the second – a few of which had been dubbed into English; hold it long-established. By way of doing this, this may get you off to a quality begin to move on and to definitely grasp your language. There are three rules, i love to consult them as the golden principles of language finding out, that each and every and all people of us should be doing when going about learning a language. The primary rule is – stay up for it – the primary rule is live the language, speak it, learn it, write it, dream in it, sing it even; sing to your self.My brother and i once we began studying Greek, we decided to put in writing songs in the language. Do not fear, i am not about to embarrass my brother, and that i certainly is not going to be singing for you all this morning. That said, with a purpose to grasp the language, you ought to make it yours, possess the language. So why no longer put your mobilephone or pc in the language you’re studying? Number two: make mistakes. Sure, you heard me adequately. Make as many as you need.Why? On account that we be taught by means of making errors. It can be really the only manner we are able to get matters proper. As children, we’re even anticipated to make them. However as adults, we are frightened seeing that they make us consider susceptible. Admitting from the beginning we have no idea most likely the whole lot there may be to know about this new language will not preclude us from studying it. Additionally, it will really give us the freedom to go on and to grasp it. So go forth and make as many mistakes as you like. The last rule, and this is the most important one, and this is important: make it enjoyable.Grammar ideas aren’t consistently enjoyable. I mean, i like grammar, however I comprehend that not every person is so hooked in to it; now not certain why, though. But consider, some thing you are able to do in English, you are able to do in another language, so make it enjoyable. And actually, by way of making it enjoyable, by making the system wonderful, you’re serving to your self keep motivated. And the more stimulated you might be, the better your probabilities are of succeeding. So exit and let your ingenious juices waft. The great factor as well is why not try and get persons, other humans, concerned? Say, colleagues, acquaintances, and turn it into a small, pleasant competitors. Truely, studies show if you happen to get a pleasant competitors going, that your probabilities of succeeding are significantly better, and they increase your performance. Languages are mostly perceived to be the first-rate unknown. We prefer to consider of them as anything unfamiliar, and but, we know a lot about them due to the fact all human languages have their possess ordinary but attractive approaches of expressing suggestions, ideas, and fact, despite the fact that we’re not mindful of it in the beginning.Via now delving into the unknown and realizing the acquainted, we will be able to be able to grasp probably the most pleasurable, profitable, and effective abilities we possess as humans: human conversation. And who would face up to trying to be trained a language with these linguistic pearls? The first one could be, as you say in French, (French) Ayez Les dents longues, (English) which is ‘be bold.’ It actually manner, nonetheless, ‘have lengthy enamel.’ (Laughter) Mine are not that long. I might prefer to want you all in Italian (Italian) In bocca al lupo, (English) which is ‘just right good fortune,’ but actually way ‘into the mouth of the wolf.’ (Laughter) And eventually, as we are saying in Ukrainian, (Ukrainian) Skilky mov ty znayesh – stilky raziv ty lyudyna, (English) because of this "The extra languages you already know, the more humans you might be." revel in finding out a new language.(Applause) .

[batterymonster2021]

How to learn any language easily | Matthew Youlden | TEDxClapham

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How to learn any language easily | Matthew Youlden | TEDxClapham

Translator: Hoa Pham Reviewer: Denise RQ learning a language can suppose a little bit like rocket science, something out of this world and out of attain for the great majority of us. This is not a notion, however, simply held by using many English monolinguals on our island. It is usually shared by a lot of our linguistic cousins additional afield, say, in the U.S. Or Australia. Let’s be honest: on the subject of learning languages or speaking them, we’re the form of people that likes to think we’re fluent in a large number of various languages such as Geordie, Kiwi, Cockney, or what about Canadian? Do not get me unsuitable. I am very, very pleased with my Mancunian heritage, however i wouldn’t suggest it is a separate language simply but. In any case, we don’t need subtitles once we are observing Coronation road, now do we? Although i can see you two pronouncing, "I do." (Laughter) yet, regardless of this, if you happen to had been to go the Channel, or say, if you are feeling moderately extra adventurous, pass the Severn Estuary into Wales, there you might to find that talking one more language or being bilingual is with ease a fact.But, there and additional afield, many are still convinced of the fact this is a lengthy, difficult, moderately painful, and dare I say, daunting task. In this room of one hundred folks, i’d wager that at least 15 different languages are spoken apart from English. Actually, the final census of 2011 revealed that a stunning 22% of Londoners – that’s 22%, one in 4, practically – speak yet another language at dwelling apart from English. I actually, while a Mancunian, speak approximately 20 languages, and of those, around half I converse fluently. And the question I get asked via persons probably the most is, "Why?" (Laughter) good, the answer, for me as a minimum, is as an alternative easy. I am convinced studying languages, any language per Se, is surely convenient. And that i wish to exhibit you how. As a linguist, a polyglot, and a lecturer, i know what it entails to be trained and learn a language.And probably the most greatest barriers we’re confronted when finding out are myths. And i definitely think that we need to debunk them. In an effort to consider these extra simply, I came up with the nice and friendly sounding acronym D.I.E. (Laughter) which funnily sufficient, should you write it out no longer pronounce, if you happen to write it out, it’s one of the most words for ‘the’ in German. Fable quantity one: learning a language is conveniently too tricky. I will by no means be equipped to communicate another language relatively just like the language I used to be born with. Technically, you’re now not born with a language. Anyone right here could have ended up, with say, eastern as our first language. We had been effectively surrounded or immersed in the language in general from an extraordinarily early age. There are individuals, however, available in the market – many of them, in fact – who began to be taught a language, the 2nd or might be even the 0.33, so much afterward in life. And guess what? They’re now wholly fluent in this language or these other languages even perhaps extra so than in their so-called mother tongue.Why is this? Since there is not any cutoff date in which you have got to have learned a different language. Consider about how many people who say, "Ugh! My kids are doing French in college. I relatively want them to turn out to be fluent. However I can’t, no means, it can be impossible. I must’ve conveniently paid extra attention once I was once at tuition." good, reviews expose that while youngsters most of the time are so much faster at selecting up a brand new language than folks older than them, it’s truely us – that you could just breathe as a sign of relief – it’s us, the adults, who’re extra powerful at studying them. Why is that this? Because now we have the expertise of learning. We know methods to gain knowledge of already. Myth number two: languages are with no trouble beside the point. I don’t have to learn a further language in any respect.And as we hear, and regrettably hear rather lots – I was once going to do in a cockney accent, but I won’t do it at all. I will spare myself the embarrassment of doing that – languages … Every body speaks English, anyway. Good, besides the obvious advantages of talking another language – for illustration, monetary advantages and mental advantages, i.E., better pay, extra job possibilities, maintaining us mentally match, and truly serving to to stave off neurological diseases similar to Alzheimer’s- there are real hidden gemstones we will realize once we converse yet another language. How about getting an upgrade in your hotel room, as was once lately the case with my uncle before going to Turkey on holiday? He asked me if I would send him over just a few phrases and greetings in the language that he might try out in the inn.Turns up, caught over this suitcase, throws out a few sentences in Turkish, and bam!, he’s given an improve on his resort room instantly. (Laughter) You would now not normally get an upgrade on your resort room. I are not able to promise you this. Nevertheless, i will be able to promise that you maybe simply perhaps, through an additional language, will meet the love of your existence. We all keep in mind Jamie from Love clearly finding out Portuguese for Aurlia. And correctly, virtually one in ten Brits is married to any individual who used to be born overseas. Moreover, the Guardian stated on research showing that individuals who are able to converse two languages or extra better adapt or are higher equipped at dealing with issues, that they’re better at multitasking and prioritizing tasks. That is obviously a so much sought-after ability in our day and age when anybody appeared to be glued to our telephones. I wonder how many humans now who’re looking at this shall be glued to their telephones, and how many are clearly going to bilingual? Myth number three: you must be an expat and be in a situation where the language is constantly spoken, even to simply get a snatch of the language.There is no damage in without difficulty packing up and moving to a village within the center of nowhere, nevertheless it’s no longer really vital. Now the satisfactory unknown: my brother and that i – i’ll depart you to make a decision who’s who; he is clearly my twin brother – my brother and that i at the same time being headquartered in Berlin, Germany, determined to undertake the undertaking of learning Turkish in simply seven days. We decided to undertake the challenge of studying Turkish in simply seven days in an effort to show what you are able to do with the aid of effectively putting your intellect to it. I am no longer saying we all need to be going available in the market and studying a language in every week nor that it is simply possible to be trained absolutely the whole thing there’s in this sort of quick house of time. I will guarantee you, it isn’t. Perfection isn’t the intention right here.The purpose, nonetheless, is to get as good as we very likely can in a detailed language, within the shortest time viable. This means to the dismay of university teachers all for the period of the globe, "Take shortcuts." The first-rate factor about these shortcuts is we can observe them to any language that we would like to be taught. And furthermore, they’re so simple, you perhaps left thinking at the finish, "Why did not I think of that?" So let’s take a look at these shortcuts. Quantity one: analyze the similarities, focal point on equivalent factors. As audio system of English, we already comprehend so much about different languages, given the fact that our language itself, almost, is a Germanic language with the wealth of influences and vocabulary from a multitude of specific languages as numerous as Latin, Hebrew, or Hindi. Doing this will likely help strengthen patterns in the language and in addition will aid us to guess the that means and formation of phrases and things that we don’t yet know. As you see on this slide, for example, we are able to see how closely associated English is to fellow different Germanic languages and even to languages that are, in this case, Romance languages, however that English is a Germanic language basically.Shortcut quantity two: hold it easy. In the beginning sight, you could consider you are studying a language that doesn’t have that so much in common with our possess, however through focusing on easy factors, we will be able to learn it so much speedily on the grounds that each language has convenient elements to it. Some languages simplest have two or three tenses. For example, you grow to be saying ‘I had,’ in this one form, for ‘I had,’i’ve had,’ and ‘I had had,’ and ‘i’m’ also can be ‘I might be’ and ‘i would be.’ In different circumstances, if we seem at, for example, German, we’ve a case of developed vocabulary that is derived from a couple of simple words or verbs.On this case, we’ve the verb ‘sprechen’ which is ‘to speak,’ which has now long gone on and lent itself to turn out to be ‘besprechen’ – to discuss, ‘entsprechen’ – to correspond, ‘versprechen’ and ‘absprechen,’ and many others, and so on. Shortcut quantity three: hold it imperative. Especially at the commencing of our process, we have got to ensure that it’s valuable to us. Not all people is learning German with a view to talk about business with colleagues in Berlin. Consider about this. As speakers of English, we have no idea every single phrase within the Oxford English Dictionary. So why will have to we worry about remembering every single phrase we come upon within the new language? We readily have got to make it critical to our own exact challenge right now. When it comes to learning a language, maybe the most important aspect is time. And by using time, i do not mean years upon years of unending studying as some men and women still prefer to feel. How long does it take to gain knowledge of a language? How about if I were to inform you that half-hour per day are a first-rate and effective begin? Thirty minutes – these are minutes all of us have.Be ten within the morning, ten in the afternoon, ten in the night, or half-hour in conveniently one go to be able to work, to tuition, to tuition, out in the evening, assembly friends, while we are on the train or bus. We all have all these minutes that we are able to commit to gain knowledge of. Moreover, by finding out for smaller intervals and general intervals, we will not suppose so overwhelmed via the language. And even better, studying for average periods signifies that it is more effective, considering chances are that if you’re studying for once a week or once a fortnight, by the time you next come to gain knowledge of, you’ll have already got forgotten what you initially realized. The purpose hence is to fit language studying into our day-to-day routines and now not the opposite direction around. And by means of doing this, there’s no motive why after with ease one month, you are not able to get through in your new language. These energetic forms of studying, we have got to compliment them with what i might like to refer to as passive varieties of learning.Having breakfast: change the radio on and listen to a station within the language, turn out to be accustomed to the tune of the language. The song is not going to handiest help you get used to the sounds, to the intonation, and to the rhythm however the words you can hear will also help you companion them; given that you know the songs, and you can be competent to partner them with these songs, hence expanding our vocabulary. Had a tough day? Deal with yourself to a television series or a movie within the language, and put subtitles on, in English, and then, others can join and watch with you as good. We all know how all people seems to be going crazy about this Scandinavian television crime series on the second – a few of which had been dubbed into English; hold it long-established. By way of doing this, this may get you off to a quality begin to move on and to definitely grasp your language. There are three rules, i love to consult them as the golden principles of language finding out, that each and every and all people of us should be doing when going about learning a language. The primary rule is – stay up for it – the primary rule is live the language, speak it, learn it, write it, dream in it, sing it even; sing to your self.My brother and i once we began studying Greek, we decided to put in writing songs in the language. Do not fear, i am not about to embarrass my brother, and that i certainly is not going to be singing for you all this morning. That said, with a purpose to grasp the language, you ought to make it yours, possess the language. So why no longer put your mobilephone or pc in the language you’re studying? Number two: make mistakes. Sure, you heard me adequately. Make as many as you need.Why? On account that we be taught by means of making errors. It can be really the only manner we are able to get matters proper. As children, we’re even anticipated to make them. However as adults, we are frightened seeing that they make us consider susceptible. Admitting from the beginning we have no idea most likely the whole lot there may be to know about this new language will not preclude us from studying it. Additionally, it will really give us the freedom to go on and to grasp it. So go forth and make as many mistakes as you like. The last rule, and this is the most important one, and this is important: make it enjoyable.Grammar ideas aren’t consistently enjoyable. I mean, i like grammar, however I comprehend that not every person is so hooked in to it; now not certain why, though. But consider, some thing you are able to do in English, you are able to do in another language, so make it enjoyable. And actually, by way of making it enjoyable, by making the system wonderful, you’re serving to your self keep motivated. And the more stimulated you might be, the better your probabilities are of succeeding. So exit and let your ingenious juices waft. The great factor as well is why not try and get persons, other humans, concerned? Say, colleagues, acquaintances, and turn it into a small, pleasant competitors. Truely, studies show if you happen to get a pleasant competitors going, that your probabilities of succeeding are significantly better, and they increase your performance. Languages are mostly perceived to be the first-rate unknown. We prefer to consider of them as anything unfamiliar, and but, we know a lot about them due to the fact all human languages have their possess ordinary but attractive approaches of expressing suggestions, ideas, and fact, despite the fact that we’re not mindful of it in the beginning.Via now delving into the unknown and realizing the acquainted, we will be able to be able to grasp probably the most pleasurable, profitable, and effective abilities we possess as humans: human conversation. And who would face up to trying to be trained a language with these linguistic pearls? The first one could be, as you say in French, (French) Ayez Les dents longues, (English) which is ‘be bold.’ It actually manner, nonetheless, ‘have lengthy enamel.’ (Laughter) Mine are not that long. I might prefer to want you all in Italian (Italian) In bocca al lupo, (English) which is ‘just right good fortune,’ but actually way ‘into the mouth of the wolf.’ (Laughter) And eventually, as we are saying in Ukrainian, (Ukrainian) Skilky mov ty znayesh – stilky raziv ty lyudyna, (English) because of this "The extra languages you already know, the more humans you might be." revel in finding out a new language.(Applause) .