#so thin as in i can hear them literally pee sometimes

[fanghusband]

the wall between me and my neighbour is so thin sometimes i wanna explode a little

[maybankcore]

rafe cameron — nsfw alphabet ༝༚༝༚

context : the alphabet.. but each letter has a new rafe cameron nsfw/sfw concept. this is also bunny!reader x rafe.

tws : smut, nsfw, rafe x sweet/bunny reader, cream pie, voyeurism, brief degrading, brief daddy kink. fingering, porn/nudes, tying reader up, oral sex, a ton of nsfw headcanons.

A: aftercare • you would tend to get sleep almost immediately after you come, and the first thing rafe does is take you to the bathroom and let you pee so u don’t get a UTI, n he’ll probably wait outside and keep asking “u done baby?” ‘till you clean up. and obviously, after the oh so harddd task of peeing, he’ll carry you back to bed. rafe somehow doesn’t get tired after sex, but seeing you already get lazy eyed, he has no choice but to lay down with his little bun and cuddle up with her.

B: boobs. literally boobs. • rafe loves your tits, and he loves grabbing them even more. he’ll randomly come up behind you when you’re doing your makeup, hair, etc. and just grab ur boobs. he loves the way they fit perfectly in his big palm, and how flustered you get too. “rafe! stop— i’m doing my makeup!!” you’d say, as you wave his hands away, feigning annoyance. “relax baby, their just too tempting.” rafe snickered, smirking. rafe just can’t get enough of them, especially when your wearing the thin, baby pink, lacy top from victoria’s secret.

C: cum • okay, rafe knows that he has to use a condom, blah blah blah. but on those days where he just needs a good, raw, fuck.. trust me, he’d cum inside you, making sure every inch of his hot cum fills you up to the brim. and rest assured, you’d hate and love it at the same time.

D: dirty talk • he’d soooo dirty talk you in public, whispering sweet nothings in your ear, knowing how wet your sweet pussy gets just by the sound of his voice. he’d sometimes say the most vile things about what he’d to you when you both get home.

“do you really think i’m not noticing your blowjob eyes as i’m golfing, huh? y’know.. i’d love seeing those eyes of yours when i’m fucking you endlessly. making you cum so hard. oh god, baby, i can hear those pretty moans of yours already. hmm?” he’d huskily whisper, inches by the shell of your ear. and then, he’d walk off as if nothing happened. leaving you anticipated for the entire day, squeezing your thighs and drinking an excessive amount of water to help with the heat building in your cheeks.

E: experience • rafe deffo has experience with sex. but i wouldn’t call him the biggest man-whore, since he met you in s2 of obx, i’d say he had 4 bodies by then. 2 of them being random hookups and the other 2 being girls from a short term relationship w/ him. i also hc that bunny!reader would have a few bodies, but would act like she’s a virgin just for rafe, similar to how maddie perez did it.

F: fingering • mmm, rafe is a master at fingering. he knows how to get your pussy wet and make it even wetter when he’s touching you. he’d start off with just a few strokes on your clothed pussy, building up tension that you so desperately want to release. n then when you’d get all needy he’d slide your panties down and spread your thighs.

you’d position yourself on his lap, head on his shoulder, looking at him with your big bambi eyes, pleading. and he’d slowly circle your clit in circular motions, taking pleasure in the way your hips jerked and lips parted with heavy breaths. and then he’d sink two fingers in, slowly at first, and then going faster. the cold touch of his golden rings slipping between your lips made you moan. loud. and in amidst of all this, he’d be doing some random thing on his laptop, but secretly taking a voice memo of your sweet moans. to obviously jerk off to later, you really think he’d pleasure you and restrict himself from doing it later on?

G: g-spot • imagine no guy has actually found your g-spot before, they’d just fuck you and you’d get that tiny ounce of pleasure that made you cum, but when rafe first fingered you, curling up his fingers to hit that sweet spot that only you yourself could find, you UNRAVELED. i’m sure he was shocked at how loud you moaned. he had thought you’d never gotten fingered before. but when you told him that no guy had actually fingered you that good, he was both pleased and shook. “what d’you mean no one’s found your g-spot? isn’t that like— the main thing in sex??” but to be honest.. him being the only guy that found your g-spot really boosted his confidence lol.

H: hair • rafe absolutely loves your hair, playing with it, braiding it, seeing how it drapes over your shoulders elegantly. he had never met someone who takes care of their hair like their life depends on it. you’d have serums, hair masks, good hair days and bad hair days, and rafe was all here for it.

(this is for my curly hair readers btw). sometimes when your hair wasn’t cooperating you’d get annoyed and bang your hairbrush against your head, clearly disheveling your hair, and rafe would come over and brush it for you. putting in your gel, mousse and even diffusing it.

rafe also is weirdly obsessed with how your hair smells, he’d bury his shoulder into it, or randomly smell it throughout the day, and once he’d even gotten wheeze to smell your hair.. “her hair smells so good right? i don’t even know how, it just smells fuckin’ amazing.” he’d proudly state, and you not being sure if wether that’s creepy or cute.

I: initials (tattooed) • right on his chest, beneath his heart, are the two letters of your name, more so, your initials. Y/N.Y/L/N written in a bold, italic font. and right next to it is your favorite animal, a bunny. you were struck when he had actually gotten a whole ass bunny tatted next to your initial!!

J: jerking off in ur absence • whenever rafe has trips, or if you’ve been away for some time, rafe deffo jerks off to pictures you sent to him. you’d send a teasing mirror pic of you getting dressed, your hand covering your nipples. and then you’d send a soapy tit pic of you in the shower. but lastly, a day before you come back, you’d send the hottest picture of you in rafes favorite pink lingerie set, playing with yourself and moaning rafes name. leaving him needy and desperate until he lands..

K: kinks • omg the amount of kinks u and rafe would share imagine him fucking you for the first time and slowly starts roughing you up, only to see you cooperate and urge him to do more. the smirk on his facee😩.

L: location (where you fuck) • personally, public sex is a huge turn in for rafe, but being the little slut you are, it’s an even bigger turn-on for you. obviously you’d fuck in his bed or yours, and sometimes i’m the couch or kitchen counter. rafe would also take you on the druthers boat and make you ride his lap, stopping when a boat comes buy, your sweaty face and messed up outfit being evident.

M: marks • rafe would leave hickeys everywhere. stomach, thighs, neck, collarbone, shoulders, tits, even inches away from your pussy. you’d leave bite marks on rafe, scratches illuminating his back, and lipstick stains all over his collar and cheek.

N: nudes • he just has a hidden album filled with your nudes. wether its videos of you both fucking, teasing pictures you’d send him of your bikini try ons, or you fingering your self. he’d also have voice memos of your moans saved. p.s, rafe would so ask you to talk about something random for a minute on voice memos and jerk off to your voice.

O: only fans acc • a little similar to the one on top ^. but imagine making an only fans account where ur only follower/subscriber is rafe. and trust, he will act like a whole ass fan. he’ll comment on your videos; “omg ur so hot can i request food play” with a +400$ message next to it. youd livestream and he’d be your only viewer, talking you through playing with yourself. and when i mean he’s a fan, i mean this man would literally pay you 1000$ per month as per his ‘subscription’..

P: plushies • whilst fucking you hard, rafe would grab your favorite plushy and tell you to hold it. he found it so fucking hot seeing you cling onto the soft toy, bringing it to your mouth to bite onto to hold back your loud moans.

Q: quickies • yall would deffo have quick fucks in between parties, hangouts, dinners, etc. sometimes if your ovulating you’d practically beg on your knees for a quickie with rafe. “rafeyy, please. if you don’t do anything i’ll go to the bathroom n’deal with it myself!” you whine, nudging his arm to get up from his seat at an event. and obviously, he gives in. every. single. time.

R: riding his thigh • when your extremely horny, and need an immediate relief youd prop yourself on rafes thigh and start grinding. this would be your only option as he’d dismiss your attempts to make him fuck you, so he’d tap his thigh and say “if your really that horny jus’ ride my thigh. cmon, you wanted to come, right?”. you’d get so wet, making a mess on his sweatpants.

S: sucking his dick • messy blowjobs>>. sucking him off after a hard day, at a party when he’s high and needy, or right after you went to his family dinner. you’d look so perfect with your big, glossy eyes staring up at him. head bobbing as you perfectly swirl the pad of your tongue against the base of his cock. him groaning and praising your amazing head-giving skills.

T: tying you up • hands above your head, a belt knotted against both your wrists, restraining you from pushing rafe away whilst he fucks you mindlessly. rafe would be destroying you, pounding in and out as you take the pleasure like a good girl. you are his little bun, after all.

U: unfair • teasing you when your sat on his lap, waiting for him to finish off his work, whilst he slowly and lightly circles your clit. “daddy, i really need you.” you’d moan in his ear. “i know baby, i know. daddies gotta finish this off first, ‘kay?” and so you waited, only for him to go into the shower, not even letting you in.

V: voyeurism • sliding your panties off and stuffing it in his pocket is his favorite thing to do when he’s off golfing whilst your sitting in your garden chair, feeling the coldness of the air blowing against your sticky cunt. not being able to fix the unbearable tension in your pulsing clit, and having to wait till you get home.

W: what/how big is he • a whopping 7.3 inches. a tad bit specific ik, but the way he’d ruin you.. and what’s funny is the fact that rafe knows he’s big!! and he knows that you can take it too.

X: ion know what to put for this one.. so i’m gonna put a random hc of rafe.. • has a weird food play kink?.. i just feel like he’d take ice cream and lick it off your tits, or spread chocolate syrup all over your nipples and stomach and lick it off too. (obviously nothing down there, don’t wanna get a yeast infection).

Y: ‘your too big!’ • lining himself up against you, seeing his big cock already needy of slamming into you, made you worry. your eyes slightly widened at his size, how the fuck is he gonna fit?. “rafey, i don’t think it’s gonna fit.. your too big.” you mustered out, wanting but at the same time not wanting him. “shhh bun, ts’ gunna fit, i’ll go realll slow? okay baby?” he stated, making you ease up and unclench your pussy, allowing full entrance. he slowly slid inside you, already owning a long moan and scatters of whimpers escaping your mouth. he went in further, and you took him in fully. “good girl, i told you it’d fit.”

Z: also have no idea, so another random hc one again! • loves seeing you spit out his cum after sucking him off. just seeing his cum drop down your chin turns him on sm and makes him hard asf.

⊹˚₊‧───────────────‧₊˚⊹

[justpottytime]

person A and B are online friends who each know what the other is into... so like... peeing. and they will often share pics, do text chats, or do video calls with fake reasons why they have to hold it in, to justify why they have to wet themselves in the end. the excuses can be complicated and involved, or can be really simple, such as: "I don't wanna get up... I'm too comfy in bed... but I need to pee so bad!!" and B thinks it's cute they're so whiny. sometimes A will say something like that, and B will coax them into getting a towel to sit on, knowing it won't really protect anything if A really cuts loose. and A is like "well, okay I guess... but I'm not going to wet it!" even though they totally are and they know it. and sure enough... A's hold starts wearing down. and they keep telling B that they're going to let out a little pulse of pee, just to take the edge off their fullness, only to whine to B that they let out a big gush instead! and eventually their wet pulses get longer and even wetter, until their urine is literally hissing into the towel in little embarrassing gushes. the towel ends up soaking wet and there's still a puddle on the bed while A's heavy stream splatters onto the soggy stuff below. meanwhile B usually just video calls A when they gotta go, and shows what clothes (or lack thereof) and what location they're going to pee in. A's favorite was watching them pull down their pants while they were stuck in traffic, and then B started spurting onto the rubber floor mat (boot tray?) until finally their thick stream picked up and made a steady line from their crotch to the floor, unbroken, for a full minute. the floor mat has raised edges, so their pee made a whole huge lake!

I love how vulnerable fear wetting is! the thing scaring them might be a harmless thing that is an irrational fear, or something unique that won't really hurt them in a roleplay scenario, but whatever the case... the victim sinks to the ground, their legs become jelly, and their crotch very slowly darkens as a thin little stream begins trickling gently against the fabric between their legs. they weren't bursting to go, and the stream is tiny, but it's unmistakable what that is leaking into the crotch of their pants... and they don't even notice at first, staring straight ahead, wide eyed and paralyzed. eventually the spot on their crotch is just saturated enough to glisten, and a single drip starts rhythmically tapping onto the floor, making a tiny yellow puddle that only grows one drop at a time. eventually the victim hears the tapping, or feels that telltale warming sensation around their crotch, and looks down, barely even being able to understand that they're dribbling urine in their pants... and then the thing that scared them moves or makes a noise or something. they snap their eyes back to it, and the tapping gets faster until it sounds like more of a pitter patter. the darkening fabric spreads to their inner thighs, dribbling down each leg to puddle at their knees, and at this point they know their bladder is emptying, and the embarrassed upset feelings are only adding to the overwhelmed helplessness that's making that dribble of pee impossible to control. maybe the fear thing then moves on... and the victim looks down and stops their stream at once. or maybe they start crying and just let the rest go at a more normal peeing pace, because their pants are wet already, and they just want it all out of them.

Oooooh, two very different but excellent scenarios here!!!!

Having omo friends that you can just casually hold and wet with is so niiiiice, it's a great way to bond and it feels good to have someone who understands and even encourages you on! Putting on little shows for each other, probably vying to see who can make the other more flustered with what they do~

And of course, fear wetting is a staple around here, it's perfect for angst or hurt/comfort and you describe it so well here! I don't even think I can add anything, just... This!!!

Thanks for the ask!

[luvnami]

𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 @yacoka​ - 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 - thank you so much for commissioning me stinky lyra!!! i hope you like it <3 if you like what you see want to leave a tip/comm me, just click on the appropriate links :-) more notes at the bottom

𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 - @forgetou​

��𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 - alcohol, food

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 - tsukishima kei x yachi hitoka x gn!reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 - 1034

yachi is in the middle of preparing dinner when you and tsukishima crash through the front door.

“ugh, all my stuff is wet,” the blond grumbles.

 he kicks his damp shoes off by the genkan before shuffling further into the apartment, rubbing the spot on his head where he had bumped it yet again against the doorframe. meanwhile, you’re struggling to untangle yourself from tsukishima’s windbreaker and the straps of your backpack. yachi rushes over to help. 

“leave your things by the fan! it’ll dry faster,” she calls out to tsukishima. 

you hear his bag hit the ground, and the shower starts up immediately after. yachi has to help pluck the green jacket off of you before you’re able to dump your wet belongings on the floor.

“oh, why did it have to rain so suddenly?” you mourn.

wet hair is plastered to your face, obscuring your field of vision. yachi giggles as she parts it so that you can see. her soft fingertips (except the rough one that she had burnt making takoyaki last week) brush against your skin gently and you smile.

“i’m home.”

“welcome back.”

thankfully, tsukishima doesn’t take too long to get out of the shower, leaving you to dart into the warm bathroom to peel your wet clothes off. you can faintly hear his conversation with yachi through the pitter patter of water against your skin as they talk about what’s for dinner.

“i hope the both of you don’t get a cold,” yachi says when you finally emerge from the bathroom. she hurries to set the table for dinner where tsukishima is already laying out chopsticks and rice bowls.

“kei gave me his windbreaker. if anyone’s getting sick, it’ll be him,” you tease and plop down by the table. tsukishima glares at you.

“if i hadn’t given you that, you’ll be complaining about getting wet. not like it helped, anyways. the rain was really heavy today.”

“aw, kei! just say that you love me already!” 

tsukishima groans in disgust as you lean forward, smacking a wet kiss on his cheek. he wipes it off with the back of his hand and you chuckle.

yachi brings the hotpot over, placing it on a portable gas stove. the pot is filled with delicious ingredients, ranging from chinese cabbage and shiitake mushrooms to thin slices of meat. you drool.

“the meat was on sale today! we still have two more packs in the freezer, so eat up.” yachi smiles brightly and lights the fire.

dinner is spent slurping rich broth while chatting over how school had gone that day, your wet books fluttering like butterflies by the oscillating fan. tsukishima even fetches a couple cans of beer for everyone to share and all of you are soon warmed up by the hot and delicious meal.

“hitoka’s cooking is the best,” you sigh in satisfaction, resting against the sofa as you sip your beer.

“hehe, i’ve had a lot of time to practice.” you can spot a faint blush tinting her cheeks as she hangs her apron and comes over to the tiny living room to curl up next to you.

tsukishima is busy flicking through reality tv channels, trying to find something interesting to watch. you wrap your arm around yachi’s shoulders and plant a kiss on her temple.

the apartment that you share is barely big enough for everyone to fit comfortably in. you often find yourself knocking something off of the kitchen counter accidentally, and hearing a dull bump with a tired ‘ow’ often means that tsukishima must have hit something with his long limbs again.

it’s cozy, though, and you wouldn’t trade anything for a larger place (though a bathtub does sound tempting). because there’s still scorch marks on the wall when yachi nearly burnt the house down while making french toast, and the tiny scribbles of your three faces on the wall behind the television when you first moved in.

tsukishima’s oddly sentimental about the thrifted sofa (despite a large, fish-shaped stain that he thinks is pee — you hope that it’s wine). maybe because it’s where he had told you and yachi he loved you both for the first time, or maybe because it’s the only spot where the three of you can cuddle somewhat comfortably. he makes do with his feet sticking off of the sofa most of the time.

there’s an old biscuit tin that yachi uses to store her hair ties and clips by the window, the dog design faded from sunlight. sometimes, she manages to convince tsukishima to let her play with his hair and he usually ends up with sparkly heart shaped clips parting his fringe in the middle. you can assume from his tired but amused face that tsukishima only does it because it makes her happy.

you take another sip of your beer. your face feels a little warm, but it’s not enough to make you tipsy just yet. yachi gently grabs your hand and steals a mouthful from your drink, her soft hair brushing against your arm. the remnants of her cherry tinted lip balm remain on the edge of the can. maybe it’s the food that’s making you sleepy? yachi’s weight rests comfortably against your body, and she radiates heat off of the soft bear-print hoodie tsukishima got for her birthday. 

the lights are dim — you bought a cute mushroom lamp to reduce your electricity bill, especially since tsukishima enjoys staying up late. he’s seated on the floor with a pillow hugged to his chest. tsukishima leans his head against your thigh, blonde curls tickling your skin as he fiddles with the remote in his hands.

you let your sleepy eyes droop shut and bury your face into the crook of yachi’s neck. she lays her hand to rest on your thigh. tsukishima lowers the volume of the television and takes your beer can from you when he notices that you’re dozing off. he drapes a blanket over you and yachi not long after, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

love must be as natural as this, you think. as natural as the blooming of flowers every spring, as the waxing and waning of the moon.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 (𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨) - the last line is a reference to tsukishima and yachi’s name. the kanji for their names respectively means ‘moon island’ and ‘compassionate flower’. this line was written in mind of the face that tsukishima is the moon and space, while yachi is the earth and flowers.

so what does this make the reader? you are a mortal human being, existing between these two great creations.

it is only natural for us to be in awe and in love with the earth and space, as all other humans before us have.

hence this is why the love is ‘natural’ (metaphorical), and also because when you fall in love with someone, it can be difficult to pinpoint the exact reason why you love them because you’re already caught up in the motion of doing so (literal).

i hope that makes sense! i honestly wanted to focus more on this theme but i got carried away with how a small home is often packed full of memories that you often don’t realise until you’re moving out, etc. i honestly would love to write about this pairing again lol it’s really cute.

i didn’t describe the apartment in full detail, but i got the idea of tsukishima bumping his head from this article. i also found this while doing my research, but honestly it’s more of an apartment for working couples than struggling college students lol

[irwintry]

hiiii babe sorry to bother youuu can i request a lil writing where the reader is rlly good friends with 5sos and luke ash and mikey think her and cal are both hopelessly in love with each other and at the very end they confess??? youre the bestest💖🥺

hi babe! i’d love to :-) p.s. you’re the bestest best 

-

He had one hand on the wheel, another curled around the gear shift while he tapped mindlessly to the latest pop song on the radio. Physically, he was in the same care as you, but mentally, you knew he was knocking back drinks on a beach somewhere far from reality. Work consumed him; it consumed all of them. 

You kept quiet, not a thought in your mind on the ride over to Luke’s. The pseud cat-and-mouse game you conjured up in your head had been going on for too long for it to overwhelm. Most days, you pretended your feelings for Calum hardly existed at all. So, you tapped to the beat of the song and stared out the window at the setting sun. A few drinks with friends would get your mind off of it. 

Their only job failed as the night dragged on. 

Calum’s head was elsewhere for hours. His shifty eyes trained on posters and unimportant objects in the room before settling back on you. Once your brows furrowed in concern, he pressed his lips into a thin line and rejoined the conversation.

“Okay, whoever bought this cider—” Michael began, voice booming loud over the four others. “—I’m in love with you.”

“I’ve literally never tasted anything so heavenly before,” Ashton said against a sloppy slurp on the cider can’s rim. 

“That’s what she said.”

“Oi, fuck off.”

“Y/N brought them,” Calum said monotonously, although you could see a small smile grow on his lips. 

Michael’s jaw dropped dramatically. You could visualize the drunken thoughts swirling around his brain. “We’re in love?” 

A giggle left your lips. “Only if you say so, Mikey.”

“How’s Y/N gonna be in love with that—” Luke pointed at Michael across from him. “—when they can have this.” His finger moved toward Calum. 

Your chest felt hot, but only for a brief moment. Calum’s eyebrows knotted as a short laugh left his lips. And then, in those few split seconds, you swore you saw something else flash over him. Was he nervous? 

“What the hell’re you talkin’ about, mate?” Michael asked. Everyone was all laughter and smiles, brains buzzing with light intoxication while a bowl of chips was passed between the group. It never mattered how much Michael drank—his voice carried high above everyone else’s.

“Oh, c’mon, Mike,” Ashton chimed in, “you’ve seen it. These dumbasses—” He motioned to you and Calum. “—are hopelessly in love. You can see it in their eyes. They scream desperate romance.”

“Care to explain what you mean by desperate romance?” you said to Ashton. 

“No.”

“How’ve you not seen it, Michael?” Luke said. 

Michael looked properly taken aback by his friends. Meanwhile, Calum stayed silent through it all. He seemed amused, but you pretended that his silence spoke words only you needed to hear. 

You folded your arms over your chest. “Do I get any say in this?” you asked.

“Why—are you gonna deny it?” 

Your mouth went dry. “Well, I—I just wanna know why you think we’re in love. That’s all. Relax. You guys are so accusatory tonight.”

“Cos’ you two are the most lovesick-y pair of airhead lovebirds that I’ve ever seen,” Ashton said through laughter. He took a quick sip of the cider you brought. “You’re attached at the hip—practically meltin’ into each other.” 

“I—what?” Your eyes found Calum across the living room. He had his jaw clenched until his eyes found yours in return. They were wide—panicked almost, and his hands fidgeted with his can of cider to keep busy. 

The more you looked at him, the more you understood why his friends felt this way. 

Calum stood a second later. “’M gonna take a piss.” 

“Lovely, mate,” said Michael. “Thanks for sharing.”

“Anytime.”

You watched with a frown as Calum left down the hall. Something in your chest pulled, telling you to go after him and talk the last few seconds through. The more you let time pass, the larger the feeling grew. It was building in your stomach like a heavy, dark mass. 

The conversation between the other boys faded into something of little nonsense. So, you stood too, barely glancing back as you hurried down the hall. Your fingers had fallen numb.

You shifted weight between your feet until the bathroom door opened a minute later. Calum raised his brows, allowing room for you to squeeze by him, but you didn’t budge. 

“You all right?” he asked. His pouting lips were already a distraction. 

“Did that bother you?” you said breathlessly. You could still hear the close chatter of the other three in the living room as you spoke. “Back in there? A-about the whole—”

Calum shook his head. Now, he seemed unaffected and confused. “No. It was—it was just banter. Between friends. I mean—” He chuckled and scratched his nose. Now, you could see the nerves peaking through. “—we’re close. They’re gonna make fun of us no matter what we do.”

“They think we’re in love.” 

“Yeah. They made that pretty clear.”

You didn’t know how to edge it out of him. You didn’t know why the words felt like molasses on your tongue or why your chest ignited with sparks when he kept his eyes locked on you. You didn’t know why you were desperate to reveal everything right then and there because your best friends had innocently joked around with you. But you wanted the feeling to leave you alone. A confessional was worth it to get the thoughts out of your mind. 

“Do you think we’re in love?” you ended up asking. 

Calum didn’t react. He didn’t speak. He stared at you as if the answer would be spoken for him. But his eyes softened, the corner of his lips twitching before spreading into a smile. 

“I, um—” He hugged his arms tight. “Sometimes I think that. Yeah.”

“Sometimes.”

“Do you?”

You nodded slowly. “Sometimes.”

Calum grinned until crinkles appeared beside his eyes. Nevertheless, you still couldn’t read him. Whether he was happy with your answer or playfully amused, all you wanted was a solid answer. Did he reciprocate your feelings or not? 

“You’re in love with me, darling?” he asked. 

You hadn’t expected to answer that. “I-I—” Your throat closed up, and it wasn’t because Calum’s tongue had slipped over his bottom lip. “You’re making this so hard on me.” You managed a small chuckle, but the sweat collecting on the back of your neck proved that you weren’t joking. You pressed your hands to your cheeks as heat spread into them. 

“I’m so sorry—no, you don’t have t’answer that.” Calum took your wrists carefully. He lowered your hands down to your sides but his touch never left. “It’s just really nice to hear that you’ve thought about it. About us.”

“You have, too?”

“Course, babe.” He chuckled. “Like, all the time.”

You couldn’t help but smile now. “Really?” 

He nodded. “We’re not gonna tell them any of this when we get back in there, all right? Cos’ then they’re gonna be all we told you so and get all high-horse-y on us. Sometimes secrets are fun. And, um—I kinda just wanna see where this goes. I-If that’s cool with you.”

“You mean, you’re in? You wanna—you would wanna—”

Calum cut you off with a laugh and a quick peck to your lips. When he pulled away, you were certain your heart had stopped. 

“I’m in,” he said after a few seconds. “Are you?”

You tugged him down by the neck, reattaching your lips in a soft kiss. It was warm all over. A kiss that made you addicted to his touch. “I’m definitely in,” you breathed out with a smile. 

“That was cute—can I pee now?” Michael asked from behind. 

Calum’s hand slipped from your waist. “Did you hear all of that?” he said. 

“Only the part about not telling us and so on,” Michael explained, quirking a brow. “But fuck ‘em—I’ll keep your secret. As long as you don’t tell Luke I’m using his deodorant.” 

You grimaced as Calum laughed. “Deal.”

The bathroom door shut, and Calum wrapped his arms around your waist once again. 

“You wanna get out of here?”

[wingsofkpop]

Hiraeth - I.VII: Shattered Memories

pairing(s): Hybrid!Im Jaebeom x Reader, Witch!Mark Tuan x Reader, Werewolf!Jackson Wang x Reader, Vampire!Park Jinyoung x Reader, Supernatural!Got7 x Reader

genre: Supernatural!AU, Dark Magic!AU, Angst, Fluff, light Smut

warnings: Mature language, mentions of death and murder, mentions of trauma, brief depictions of sexual content, nudity, mentions of alcohol, some satanic themes, etc.

word count: 6,9k

synopsis: How far are you willing to go to find out the truth about Moon Dye Bay?…

chapter directory

Your eyes desperately survey the dim room, searching for a way to escape from this strange man who magically appeared in your bedroom. There’s no possibility of reaching the door without alerting him to your motives, nor is the window even an option since your apartment is almost nine stories up. You’ll need to come up with a different plan… Even if it means fighting your way out. 

“Look, I know it’s hard to believe—” 

You glare incredulously at the stranger, curling further into your bed to create more distance between your forms while hissing, “Jackson Wang died years ago, so unless you have some logical explanation or something, then I’m going to kindly ask you to get out of my fucking apartment before I call the police!” 

“I do have a logical explanation!” The man insists as you take another glance at your surroundings. If you play your cards right, you might be able to grab the tea mug off your nightstand, throw it at the stranger, and while he’s distracted, make a break for the door. If anything, the noise will hopefully wake up Sana… 

You snap out of your thoughts when you notice the man beginning to approach your safe perch. Deciding now is better than never, you lurch forward to grab the cup and heave it toward the stranger with all your might. However, the object merely soars straight through the man’s head and shatters against the opposite wall with a loud crash. He continues to stare at you as if nothing even happened. 

A choked breath slips past your lips. “What… the fuck…” 

“I tried to tell you.” The man raises his hands, as if to promise pacifism, and literally slides one arm inside the closed door of your closet, “I am Jackson Wang, and I am dead… but you’re still somehow able to see my spirit.” 

“So you’re… a ghost?” 

He nods. 

You narrow your eyes, still suspicious. “If you’re Jackson, then how did you die?” 

“I was killed.” 

“By who?” 

Jackson tilts his head, “Mark never told you…?” 

Your shoulders slightly loosen at the mention of your witch best friend, but you still remain on your toes in case you have to grab and weaponize your lamp. “How do you know about Mark and I?” 

“Because I’ve been watching you guys.” Jackson’s eyes widen. “Shit—that sounded really creepy. Think of it like… a guardian angel? Kind of?” 

“What?” 

He waves his hands as if expelling the idea before moving on, “If you’re a supernatural being, and you die, your spirit doesn’t really cross over like a mortal would. You’re kind of just… stuck in this place of limbo called the Other Side.” 

“But how are you able to be here? And how can I see you?”

“Spirits can attach themselves to people or objects, and use their energy to stay in the land of the living.” Jackson shrugs, “As for how you can see me, I have no clue. I’m honestly just as surprised as you are.” 

You bite your lip, trying to configure whether he’s telling the truth. If only you had asked Mark to describe Jackson back in the cave, then maybe you could have matched up his appearance. But all you have to go off of is this ghost’s words… which for the most part, seem genuine. And he hasn’t tried to hurt you—big props.  

“Okay. Let’s just say I believe you for now,” You start before quickly raising a stern finger to point your companion, “but I have tons of questions. For starters, why the hell are you in my room?” 

“I don’t really know.” Jackson grimaces, rubbing the back of his neck. “It sounds really weird, but it was like I was drawn to you…”

“Drawn to me? You mean like a magnetic pull or something?” 

He nods. “Exactly. But I really don’t know why. Maybe it has to do with how you can see me.” 

Feeling hot, you shove the heavy blankets from your body and embrace the newfound cold air against your bare skin. An exhausted, baffled sigh escapes as you bury your face in your palms, hoping to calm the throbbing in your head. Your thoughts are too wild though, and you end up meeting Jackson’s gaze in a matter of seconds. 

“So am I supposed to play Ghost Whisperer and help you cross over…?” 

“I don’t think so.” You fight off the urge to flinch as Jackson collapses onto the end of your bed with a deep huff, “But whatever it is, it’s really nice to have someone to talk to…”

“Are you alone? Like can you talk to other ghosts?” 

“I can, but it doesn’t happen very often. A lot of people on the Other Side can be pretty… intense.” 

To your dismay, your heart yearns for him. You grew up on your own after all, so you can understand what it feels like to be lonely.

“You never answered my question from before.” You say after a brief moment of silence, “...Who killed you?” 

Jackson’s eyes are dark as he thinks over your question, almost hesitating to give you the answer. While he’s debating with himself, you take the time to study his features. Now that he’s sitting entirely in the light and you’re able to see everything. 

You’re not surprised you mistook him as a human, because there’s literally no physical detail that reveals his ghastly nature. Unlike the ghost stories you’ve known, his skin is dark like honey and not transparent, while his lips are slightly chapped and hued the palest of pinks. His hair is a mocha-type brown with a couple sun-kissed caramel highlights, complimenting the sharpness of his handsome features. 

In summary, he looked no less human than another man. Although probably a bit more on the attractive side. 

“It’s honestly a long and complicated story.” Jackson says after a while, yanking your attention away from his well-defined jawline. Even so, you still continue to stare as he leans back to lay on your mattress, staring up at the ceiling with a blank expression. “I should really tell you everything from the beginning.” 

“It’s not like I’m going anywhere at…” You peer at the clock above your closet, “3 AM. We’ve got plenty of time to talk.” 

He shakes his head, “It’s not that easy. I can’t stay on this plane for too long, or else some of the witches on the Other Side will pull me back.” 

“How long do you have?” 

“Honestly… seconds.” The ghost forces himself back to a sitting position in order to better face you, “We’re technically not supposed to cross into the plane of the living. I’ve been caught a couple times before, so the witches have been keeping a close eye on me.” 

You furrow your brows. “Why don’t the witches want you over here?” 

“Because they’re afraid of upsetting the balance of nature. You’ve talked to Mark a little about that, right?” 

“He mentioned it once or twice.” You watch as Jackson rises from your bed and begins to head back to the corner in which you first saw him. He catches your gaze when he turns back around, offering forth a small smile. 

“Sorry for scaring you, by the way.” He chuckles. 

You shrug, your own lips upturning slightly. “It’s not everyday you talk to a ghost.” 

Jackson nods at your response before glancing toward the mounted clock. It’s subtle, but you manage to catch the slight flash of worry that overtakes his bright irises. When he turns his attention back to you, however, the concern is gone. 

“I don’t know when I’ll be able to return, but in the meantime, I want you to go talk to my pack.” Unlike beforehand, Jackson’s tone is scarily serious. Though it still contains remnants of his unusual gentleness. “They’ll tell you the basics you need to know to start. And, (Y/N)?” 

“Yeah?” 

Jackson’s eyes soften. “I don’t want Mark to know anything about this, okay? You’ll understand better when you hear the story.” 

“Of course.” You thumb at a loose thread along the seam of your pillowcase before shaking your head toward the ghost, “Before you go, can you at least tell me who killed you?” 

“Like I told you, it’s complicated…” He sighs, “But if you have to know, the Prime Two had a hand in my death… specifically Jaebeom.” 

You don’t know what you were expecting, but it certainly wasn’t the name of the ancient hybrid. Still, it surprises you, and it doesn’t. Given the tension all between Mark, the pack, and Jinyoung and Jaebeom, it actually kind of makes sense. But what about the conflict that Changbin hinted at? Or Jaebeom’s bitterness with Mark? What has everyone been keeping from you?

So many puzzles pieces, yet no clue how to fit them together. 

“I have to go now, but I’ll come to you as soon as I can.” Jackson’s urge brings you back to reality. “Just do what I said and get as much info as you can, okay?” 

You nod. “I’m on it. See you soon, I guess?” 

Jackson smiles again. “See you soon, (Y/N).” 

You open your mouth to say something further, but in the literal blink of an eye, Jackson is gone. Just vanished into thin air. If you didn’t know any better, you swear you hallucinated the entire conversation… but after all you’ve witnessed in Moon Dye Bay, you do unfortunately know better. 

With a groan, you fall back into your pillows, although the exhaustion from before is long gone. You doubt you’ll be able to fall asleep anytime soon, so you rise from your bed and set out to clean up the broken pieces of the mug you threw at Jackson only minutes before. 

Guess having tea before bed comes in handy sometimes. 

 ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾

Steam wafts through the tiled bathroom, gathering in a blanket of fog along the glass walls of the shower. Jaebeom releases a sigh of relief as the hot water beats against his bare back and shoulders, massaging the tension from his muscles and soaking the rest of his naked body. To gain better access to the stream, he leans forward and presses his hands against the fogged glass for support. Less he wants to slip and fall. 

Jaebeom peers down to watch the water spill down the drain, tinted red from the blood decorating his skin—Jinyoung’s blood, to be more specific. His mind immediately rushes back to the memory of his brother calling out for help in such agony and pain. He wanted to ignore it. He tried not to care. But then Jinyoung called out his name… what else was he supposed to do? 

Jinyoung deserved a lesson for getting involved in witch business again, but Jaebeom couldn’t just sit back and let him suffer through the hallucinations of their hell of a childhood. He curses himself for giving into such weakness and angrily scrubs away the patch of dried blood on his forearm. 

Maybe if you hadn’t looked at him with those bright, horrified eyes of yours after he left the room… then maybe his inhumanity could have won the battle over his sanity. 

Jaebeom continues to clean himself as his thoughts wander like the steam of the shower. Jinyoung’s fever broke earlier, so he should sleep much more soundly for the next few hours or so. His body will need time to heal, more so because of his stupid, anti-human diet. Maybe Jaebeom will be able to finally convince the pretentious prick to hunt with him after all these years. Or at the very least, drink from a blood bag. 

A faint noise that sounds vaguely like footsteps awakens Jaebeom from his shower-thought reverie. He squints through the shower door, trying to see past the curtain of steam. The bathroom is vacant save for the blurred image of his own reflection. Even so, something still proceeds to urk at Jaebeom’s senses, like an itch he can’t scratch. 

There’s someone here. 

It only takes milliseconds for Jaebeom to corner the figure that sneakily crept inside the shower with him and press them against the tiled wall. A little, feminine giggle emerges from the intruder as the hybrid cages them between his arms and broad chest. His nerves immediately calm at the devious face that stares back at him, instead earning a loud sigh of annoyance. 

“You’re lucky I didn’t rip your fucking head off.” 

“Mhm. I know how… rough you like to be.” 

Jaebeom provides the female an unamused expression. “What are you doing here, Tzuyu?” 

“Come on. I know you’re happy to see me.” Tzuyu flashes Jaebeom a radiant smile that resembles one of a temptress. Because of their position underneath the showerhead, her dark brown hair is already soaked. He also quickly realizes that she is just as naked as him. “I can’t just drop by and see my most favorite person in the world?” 

“You and I both know that’s a lie.” 

Tzuyu smirks. “That you’re my favorite person in the world, or that you’re happy to see me?” 

“What do you think?” He begins to pull away from the female vampire, but she stops him with a tight arm around his neck. Before he can blink, Tzuyu’s lips are pressed firmly against his own. Her sweet taste invades his brain like a parasite, and he can’t help but melt into the kiss, hungrily pushing his tongue past the seam of her mouth to find more of her delicacy. 

When she pulls back, Jaebeom almost growls. He lowers his hands to tightly grasp her waist before pressing her even further into the wall with his own body. In an effort to make up for the loss, he busies himself by sucking and nibbling along the canvas of her throat. His pride swells when she moans at a particular nip. 

“A little eager, aren’t we?” Tzuyu mocks, deviously brushing her knee against Jaebeom’s gradually swelling manhood. His body thrums at the brief contact, quickening his abuse against the patch where her jaw meets her neck. 

“You’re the one who interrupted my shower, remember?” He abandons her throat to trail a hand up to her breast, roughly pinching at her taut nipple and smirking at the low groan that bubbles in her chest. “If anyone’s desperate here, it’s you.” 

“Touche.” The vampire arches her back more into Jaebeom’s alluring touch. The hybrid welcomes the newfound access, dipping his head down to take one of her buds past his lips. Tzuyu releases a faint whimper before burying her fingers in his wet locks. When she harshly tugs against his scalp, Jaebeom responds with a warning growl. 

He detaches from her nipple and chuckles darkly, “We also know that you are the one that likes it rough.” 

“Maybe I do.” Tzuyu’s smile is dangerous. “So what’s the big, bad hybrid gonna do with a helpless damsel like me?” 

Jaebeom relishes the squeal of surprise that flies from her lips as he lifts her body in the air, tying her legs around his waist with a smirk. “I can think of a couple things…” 

Just as soon as the words are spoken, the muffled ring of the doorbell distracts Jaebeom from his lustful rendezvous. He releases a frustrated groan, carefully lowers Tzuyu back to the floor, then shuts off the water. The vampire follows him as he exits the shower, watching intensely as he towels off and slips into a loose pair of sweatpants. 

“Stay here.” Jaebeom says before taking off, quickly making his way through his bedroom, downstairs until he reaches the front door. Shaking out his still rather wet hair, he opens the door, prepared to tear apart whoever interrupted his moment. 

However, all his anger vanishes into thin air at the visitor on his doorstep.

His eyes widen to saucers. “(Y/N)?” 

“Jaebeom.” The animosity along your features falters when you notice his bare chest. You clear your throat before locking your gaze with his own. “How’s Jinyoung?” 

Jaebeom’s mood deflates. You’re here for Jinyoung. Not him. 

“The worst is over.” He replies truthfully, “He should be back to full health in the next few hours or so.” 

“I’m sure he could have been better a lot sooner, but whatever, right?” Jaebeom decides not to drop the fact that he actually did heal Jinyoung. Besides, even if he wanted to, your voice would have beaten him to it, “Anyway, I’m here because I need to know what happened to J…” Confusion invades his veins when your voice suddenly cuts out. He notices your gaze on something over his shoulder, internally cursing himself for already knowing what it is. 

“Who’s this pretty, little thing?” Tzuyu sidles up beside Jaebeom, eyeing your speechless form from head to toe. Her hand slithers to lazily rest on his tricep, but the hybrid can spot a symbolism of claim anywhere. And judging by the strange look in your eyes, so can you. 

“I thought I told you to stay upstairs.” 

“And miss meeting your human pet? How could I ever?” 

Jaebeom shoots the vampire a warning look. Tzuyu innocently bats her eyes. 

“I was actually just leaving.” You say, tearing Jaebeom’s attention away from his devious companion. He wants to say something further, maybe ask you to stay a little longer, but you’re already tugging your bag further over your shoulder and backing away from the door. “Tell Jinyoung that I hope he feels better, ‘kay?” 

Jaebeom shakes his head. “Sure, but (Y/N)—” 

You’re already walking away before he has the chance to finish his sentence. Jaebeom watches your form until it disappears inside a car, and even then, he watches the car until it drives past the entrance gate of the estate and out of sight. A strange, empty feeling remains in his chest, as well as the beginnings of annoyance and rage. 

Tzuyu leans forward to litter light pecks across his bare shoulder. “Should we… get back to where we left off?” 

Jaebeom slams the front door shut with a pound before pushing past the vampire without so much as a response. Tzuyu’s sigh follows him as he makes his way into the living room where he heads straight for the liquor table. He begins to pour himself a drink while Tzuyu situates herself against the doorway. Even with his back to her, he can feel her piercing gaze staring into his soul. 

“She seemed nice… (Y/N), was it?” 

Jaebeom downs his first glass of bourbon before shaking his head, “Drop it, Tzuyu.” 

“So I’m not allowed to learn about your other girlfriends? Though I have to say, I’m surprised you’d ever go for a human.” 

“It’s not like that.” He answers, glaring at the pouting vampire from over his shoulder. “She’s a friend of Jinyoung. We’ve only met like twice.”

Tzuyu smiles. This time it doesn’t spark arousal through Jaebeom’s body. It strikes fear. 

“I saw the way you looked at her, Beomie… I wasn’t lying when I said she’s a pretty thing.” 

Her tone of voice sends warning bells through his chest. 

Jaebeom hisses darkly, “Stay the fuck away from her, Tzuyu. I mean it.” 

“I would never lay on hand on your fragile human, Beom.” Something about the way her eyes gleam leaves an uneasy feeling stirring through his chest. That, and the way she looks down to check her nails with a sinister smirk. “Though I’m sure it would be so easy to cut out that sweet tongue of her—” 

“Tzuyu—” 

“Just kidding.” The vampire leaps from her perch against the doorway to steal the drink from Jaebeom’s hand. He watches her warily as she skips toward the window, staring out on the estate courtyards as she sips at the alcohol. Though her back is turned, Jaebeom can practically feel the cogs turning inside her head. 

He only hopes she keeps true to her words. For your sake. 

 ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾

The purr of the car engine blends with the hum of your cell phone receiver. With each ring that passes, the trees outside the window grow more and more abundant while the hope within your heart only becomes less and less. You sigh when the familiar monotone message clicks across the line. For a moment, you debate on whether or not to leave yet another voicemail… It’s not like she’s answered the dozens you’ve already recorded before. 

The little hope that remains outweighs your logic. “Hey. It’s (Y/N) again. I don’t know if you’re not getting my messages or just ignoring me, but… I’m really worried about you, Jihyo.” You bite your lip, readjusting your grip on the steering wheel before steering the vehicle onto another branching, dirt road. 

“Sana was really shaken up last night and things are just kind of screwed up right now—for fucksake, Ji, please just pick up your goddamn phone and call me!” You end the call with a lot more force than necessary, tossing your phone into your open bag resting on the passenger’s seat. In order to calm the frustration bubbling through your veins, you focus your attention on the winding road ahead. 

After somehow managing to acquire the location of the werewolf pack’s hangout from Bambam, Sana agreed to lend you her car. She needs some time to cope, especially with Momo and Mina’s “sudden disappearance”, so she’s taking the next couple of days away from work at Moon Dye Bay’s local cafe. 

You thought it would be wise not to drop the real bomb about her high school friends when she was already wrecked over Jihyo’s walk-out, and while you hate lying… what choice do you have? If you tell Sana the truth, then you’d have to also tell her how and why Momo and Mina died. And with that, you’d have to tell her about the bay’s secret society of witches, werewolves, vampires, etc. 

Disgust filters through your body as you’re reminded of your less than awkward visit at the Project Estate. The fact that Jaebeom is able to fuck one out of probably very many of his pretty call-girls while his best friend endures the worst of all sicknesses right down the hall just rubs you all the wrong ways. Maybe that whole speech about his humanity from Jinyoung was one big hoax to get you to feel sorry for him, but you refuse to do so. 

You also refuse to linger on how that woman you saw with Jaebeom was one of the most beautiful women you’ve ever seen… and how it settles an uncomfortable pit in the depths of your gut. 

At the sight of the cabin, you push all thoughts from mind and maneuver the car to pull up in front of the large residence. It surprises you how abandoned and poorly-taken care of the outside of the cabin is, considering Bam said that everyone in the pack basically lives here. Then again, if one of your closest friends and packmate was killed out of the blue, you wouldn’t care much about appearances either. 

After cutting out the engine and grabbing your bag, you exit the vehicle. Bird songs and the buzzing of mosquitoes welcome you as you make your way up to the front door. You almost trip over a loose board on the cabin’s wraparound deck, but you manage to catch yourself before you slam nose first into the wooden ground. Just as you’re about to lift your hand and rap your knuckles against the door, a familiar voice seizes your attention: 

“(Y/N)? Is that you?” Dahyun emerges from around the side of the cabin, carrying a homemade, woven basket full of wet laundry. With a hand on her hip and a raise of her eyebrow, she continues, “You’re the last person I expected to see today… Did Mark send you?” 

“No, no.” You shake your head, “I was actually hoping to talk to Chan, or maybe Yugyeom about something?” 

Dahyun offers a sympathetic smile. “Sorry, hun. Everyone’s out today except me and some of the youngsters.” She pauses to support the basket against her hip. “Is there anything I can help you with? If you’d like, we can talk while I take care of these clothes?” 

“That would be great actually.” You agree, returning Dahyun’s bright smile with a weak grin of your own. The werewolf nods and gestures for you to follow her with her free hand, which you do so without any complaint. 

Once you turn the corner, your jaw almost drops at the sight of the backyard. Unlike the front of the cabin, which looks so unkempt and depressing, the back is the total opposite. It almost reminds you of a mini oasis, with the tiny pond full of flowered lily pads and the bushes of vivid, flourishing roses. Twinkling fairy lights hang from branches of trees, and you can only imagine how pretty it would appear at night. 

You and Dahyun pass a couple of other strangers playing Uno at one of the few picnic tables stationed around the massive yard. One of them, a young dirty-blonde teen, looks up as you walk by and offers a kind smile, which you can’t resist to return. 

Dahyun hums, “That’s Felix. Chan’s little brother.” 

“Really? I didn’t know he had a brother.” 

You take a seat on a mossy tree stump, watching as Dahyun sets down her basket and begins to hang the wet laundry along an already prepared clothesline. After staring for a few moments, you climb back to your feet and move to help the werewolf. 

She grants you a grateful smile and shrugs, “Most don’t. Felix hasn’t triggered his gene yet.” 

“His gene?” You repeat, pinning a large, black T-shirt onto the line. 

“Oh right. You probably don’t know much about wolves yet.” Dahyun peels open a moist towel and continues, “Basically, we’re born with this gene that has to be ‘triggered’ in order for us to activate our werewolf abilities.” 

“So the whole werewolf bite or scratch thing is a myth?” 

“One hundred percent bullshit.” She laughs. 

You chuckle as well, before inquiring further, “How do you trigger it?” 

Dahyun’s laughter immediately cuts out. Thinking you said something wrong, you open your mouth to reconcile, but the wolf beats you to it. Her tone nowhere near as light-hearted as before: 

“You have to… kill someone.” 

Your stomach twists, butterflies of revulsion fluttering all the way up to your chest. You notice how Dahyun no longer tries to meet your eyes, instead fully investing her attention in wringing out the dripping wet mass of fabric before pinning the corners to the line. 

“It’s usually an accident for most of us though.” She shrugs with a faraway expression, “Sometimes we just lose control of our emotions and things get out of hand… then somebody ends up dead, and you turn the next full moon. Whether you meant to or not.”  

You reach over to place a comforting hand on her elbow. “I’m so sorry… That sounds horrible.” 

“It’s just the world we live in.” Dahyun seems to snap out of her traumatized state and throws a slightly awkward smile in your direction, “Anyway, once your gene is triggered, you turn into a wolf every full moon for the rest of your life.” 

“Do you have control when you turn?” 

“Not exactly. Our werewolf form is like a totally different part of us.” 

You nod in understanding. At her guidance, you begin to take down the clothes that had dried beforehand while she finishes hanging the last of the remaining laundry. Once the last garment is pinned to the clothesline, the werewolf takes a seat in the grass and moves to begin folding the dry batch. You do the same. 

“Now with all that aside, what was it that you wanted to talk about?” 

“Oh. Right.” You bite your lip, trying to come up with the best way to bring up a dead Jackson without striking a personal chord. After a moment of silence, Dahyun must notice your apprehension, as she drops the socks in her hands and leans forward to lightly pat at your calf with a patient smile. 

Her kind facial expression alone is enough to evoke a slight wave of bravery from your soul: 

“Well, I was wondering about… Jackson Wang.” You say carefully, keeping your eyes on Dahyun’s gradually faltering smile. 

The werewolf leans back from you with a heavy sigh before releasing a soft chuckle, “It’s been a while since I’ve heard that name. Though I’m a little surprised… I thought Mark would have told you all about Jackson by now.” 

You shake your head. 

“Jackson was our first Alpha, before Chan took over. All of this actually belonged to his family—” She pauses to gesture to the cabin. “—but after his parents found out he triggered his curse, they gave it to him so he could have somewhere to get away. Eventually it became a sanctuary for the werewolves of Moon Dye Bay.” 

“Mark told me Jackson was his best friend…” 

Dahyun nods. “Ever since high school. Mark helped Jackson when he turned the first time, and Jackson was there for Mark when his mother died.” 

Your heart warms at the thought of Mark having such a close, supportive relationship with someone. However, that same feeling falters when you remember Jackson’s mysterious, tragic death. 

“So how did he die?” You ask quietly, peering over Dahyun’s shoulder to check the state of the other inhabitants in the backyard. Felix and his other friends are still engaged in their rather intense card game and are paying no mind to you nor Dahyun. The information lessens your anxiety, though only slightly. 

You return your focus to your companion when she tosses a wrinkled shirt back inside the basket with a bitter glare. “The Primes killed him.” 

“But why?” Dahyun turns at your inquiry. “There had to have been a reason? Right?” 

“When the Primes first came back to town, about four years ago, Mark and Jackson came up with a plan to try to kill their ancient asses once and for all.” 

“How? They’re invincible?” 

“Mark was going to gather enough power to break the immortality curse that makes them untouchable.” She answers, “Once Mark took out their safeguard, Jackson would drive a stake through each of their hearts.” 

You frown. “I’m guessing that didn’t go as planned?” 

“Mark couldn’t get the magic in time, but Jackson was never one to back down from a fight.” 

“What do you mean?” 

Dahyun rolls her eyes. “Jackson was one of the best people I will ever know, but his ambition always went to that big-ass head of his. That night, he was going to kill the Prime Two or he was going to die trying…” 

“So you’re saying it was… his fault he died?” 

“Yes and no.” She hums with a shrug. “Like I said, Jackson was always that ride or die kind of person. He was passionate and driven, but he was also reckless and stubborn.”  

You furrow your brow before leaning back on your palms. Puzzle pieces are slowly starting to fit together, especially concerning Mark and why he blames himself for Jackson’s death, but what doesn’t make sense is why Jackson died in the first place? If Jaebeom and Jinyoung couldn’t be killed then, and still can’t be killed now, what threat is a brash, pig-headed werewolf?... And why would Jackson be so driven to kill the Primes that he’d give up his own life doing so? 

Before you can spill your concerns to the waiting werewolf, the buzz of your phone seizes your attention. You retract the device from your bag to check the text message, finding a thread of new messages from Sana, one of which asking when you’re going to return to the apartment. You shoot her a quick answer with a promise to also pick up some dinner before you turn back to Dahyun. 

“I should probably get going. I have a couple errands to run before the sun goes down.” 

She rises to her feet in synchronization with you. “Of course. I hope I helped at least a little.” 

“You helped so much, Dahyun. Really. Thank you.” 

“I’m glad.” The werewolf smiles. “It was really nice to see and talk to you, (Y/N). If you need anything else, please don’t hesitate to come visit me again.” 

“I appreciate that more than you could know.” You lean in to give Dahyun a quick, easy hug before walking with her back toward the front of the cabin. In the midst of approaching Sana’s car, your mind shifts back to another important, yet crazy thought that occurred to you while in conversation with Jackson last night. Without thinking about the consequences, you pause and ask Dahyun one final question: 

“Is it… possible to bring someone back from the dead?” 

Judging by her tense shoulders and bewildered expression, your abrupt inquiry takes Dahyun by surprise. She merely stares at you with saucer-like eyes and parted lips for a moment, until she seems to regain her composure. 

Even then, her words are muddled and full of confusion. “I-I mean, I don’t know anything about witchcraft myself, b-but I think so?” She narrows her eyes. “...Why?” 

“Just wondering.” You play off her curiosity by pulling your keys from your bag and opening the driver’s door. With a weak smile and a nod, you bid the werewolf farewell. “Thanks again. I’ll see you around.” 

You don’t wait for Dahyun’s response, too worried that she might somehow pick up on the plan slowly building inside your head. Without a second to spare, you switch on the engine, put the vehicle in proper gear and back out of the cabin’s driveway. Dahyun watches from the deck, and though you’re distant from one another, you can feel the intensity of her stare as you maneuver back onto the dirt, forest roads. 

Once you’re a decent distance from the cabin, you find your cell phone, pull up a specific contact and balance the device on your shoulder. The line picks up after two rings, and you don’t wait for the usual chime of a greeting. Not when you’re so deep into everything now. 

“Bam, I need everything you have on necromancy.” You say into the phone, squeezing the leather cover of the steering wheel in a mixture of anticipation and excitement. “And I also need you to promise not to say a word about this to anyone… Not even Yugyeom.” 

 ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾

Changbin is fuming. Absolutely fuming. 

It feels like his entire body is made of electricity, coursing through his veins and boiling his blood red-hot. He can’t control the trembling of his hands. Not even when he stuffs them inside the pocket of his hoodie. The urge to break something is strong, but Changbin doesn’t want to break just anything… No—he wants to break someone. Hurt someone. 

There was once a time he would have never thought these words. Then again, that was before the Primes came to town, and before Jackson was murdered. Everything changed after that. Everyone changed. When the pretentious, youngest asshole of a bloodsucker showed up to reveal that Jackson’s body couldn’t even be handed over, no one put up a fight. No one stood up for their Alpha. Life just went on, as if nothing had changed. 

A hiss sounds through Changbin’s gritted teeth as he thinks back to his most recent argument with Chan and Yugyeom. Neither of them even cared when he told them that Dahyun was the one who came at him first. They didn’t listen… but why would they? Changbin is just the runt with the anger issues, right? Why would anything he have to say matter? Why should they give a damn about his perspective… about his pain?

No one understands how much Changbin misses Jackson, nor do they understand how much anger it brings him that his legacy still goes unavenged. For fucksake, no one is brave enough to say his goddamn name aloud anymore. And even when he’s mentioned, everyone pretends as if there isn’t one giant ass elephant in the room. It makes him sick. Furious. 

Changbin is suddenly awoken from his racing thoughts when his shoulder slams into the body of another walking pedestrian. He reels around and regards the hooded stranger with a deep growl, “Watch where you’re fucking going, asshole! Unless you want me to break your fucking arm!” 

“That won’t be necessary.” Changbin watches, unamused, as the stranger removes his jacket hood. His face is familiar, he realizes. Changbin feels his anger grow tenfold. 

He pulls back his own tattered hood with another growl, “You better have a good fucking reason to be lurking in our territory, witch.” 

“I came to talk to you.” The witch remains unphased by the wolf’s aggression, even when the latter stalks closer and closer to his lean form. “I think you’ll like what I have to say.” 

“Oh yeah?” Although the male is slightly taller than him, Changbin doesn’t hesitate to get up in his face. “And what makes you think that?” 

The witch doesn’t pull away, but merely shrugs. “Because we both want the same thing… Revenge.” 

Changbin’s ears perk at that single word. His ferocity falters, prompting him to create distance between his and his companion’s bodies. After tucking his hands back inside his pockets, he doesn’t say a word, but nods for the former to continue. 

The witch smirks.

“What would you say if there was a possibility to destroy the Prime Two?”  

“I’d say you’re crazy.” The wolf bites his lips, “...but I’d also say I’m the slightest bit interested.” 

“And if I told you there was also a possibility of hurting Mark Tuan in the process?” 

This time, a mirroring smirk pulls along Changbin’s lips. 

“I’d say I’m in.” 

 ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☽ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾

“Are you sure I don’t need to come over there?” 

Youngjae rolls his eyes at Mark’s concerned tone, adjusting the phone on his shoulder to better his grip on the thick grimoire in his hands. “No, hyung. Jisung and Lia left hours ago, so it’s just me.” 

“I can help you out.” 

“I really don’t think I need your help for a plant revival spell.” He glances toward the array of wilting flowers and herbs, before releasing a chuckle into the phone. “Seriously, hyung. Take the time to rest… You had a long day yesterday.” 

He can almost see Mark shaking his head over the line. “Trust me, I’m very well-rested. I slept close to sixteen hours last night.” 

“Then sleep another sixteen. Satan knows you need it.” 

Youngjae sets the grimoire down on the countertop beside a yellowing, potted basil. He lays his hand over the ancient book, feeling the electric rush of magic entering his body through his palm. Once he gathers a satisfactory amount, he removes his hand and instead points toward the dying plant. 

“I just… hate not being productive, you know?”

Youngjae watches the leaves of the basil gradually lighten and shift from rotted to fresh, finally answering when the plant stands tall, proud and very, very green: 

“You need to give yourself time, Mark-hyung. That’s the most productive thing you can do right now.” 

“I… I guess you’re right.” Mark sighs, and even through the phone, Youngjae can pinpoint his friend’s exhaustion. He hums in response and turns to revive a drooping sunflower, making note to move the plant to a perch where it can reach the sunlight. 

“By the way, have you heard from (Y/N)?” 

“No. Not since last night.” Youngjae answers. 

“I texted her this morning and this afternoon, but she hasn’t texted me back.” The siphoner doesn’t respond, focusing on ripening the cherries of the sick miniature fruit tree. “Jihyo apparently left town last night… You don’t think that’s something to be concerned about, right?” 

Youngjae shakes his head. “She was probably spooked by an ex-boyfriend or something. And I’m sure (Y/N) is busy at the university. You know how hard she works.” 

“Yeah, I know. I just wish she would at least text me back.” 

“She probably needs time to process too, hyung.” He reasons with the head witch, glancing toward the front of the mausoleum when the knock sounds from the door. “I gotta go, but I’ll let you know if I hear anything.” 

Mark hums in agreement. “Thanks, Youngjae.” 

“Mhm. Get some more sleep.” Knowing Mark would retaliate with his command, Youngjae hangs up the phone before he can respond. The siphoner mumbles a quick illusion spell to hide any evidence of witchcraft to the mortal eye, then heads toward the front door, unsure of who would be visiting the mausoleum this late in the evening.

Who Youngjae certainly doesn’t expect to see behind the door is you, standing outside with a large mass of books cradled within your arms. 

Youngjae’s eyes widen when he notices one of the titles of the books, as well as the flames of determination burning inside your eyes. He parts his lips to inquire further, but you beat him to it… and your words nearly knock all the air from his lungs: 

“I need your help to bring Jackson Wang back from the dead.” 

[taegis-gf]

Forbidden - Part 1

Dealer!yoongi x Reader

Warnings ➜ phone sex, sexting, heavy drug use, alcohol use

Summary ➜ You never meant to lock eyes with the beautiful stranger at Namjoon’s house party, you also didn’t mean to completely fall for him, knowing exactly how dangerous it was.

Word Count ➜ 9.3K

NB: if drug-taking in fics isn’t for you/or makes you uncomfortable, also reader is literally getting with a drug dealer so if any of this isn't for you  - please don’t read!

Part 2

As you tried to finish up your final assignment of the week, you sat on your dorm room bed, legs crossed in front of your laptop. You were almost there just a few more paragraphs to go.

As you finished writing the last sentence your phone began to buzz, turning it round to see who it was you read the name with a small smile, tapping your finger on the screen to answer. 

“Hey! You ready to party?” Jungkook’s loud voice yelled down the phone to you.

You rolled your eyes at his excited tone, the youngest out of all you was always down for a party, and to his own credit, he definitely knew how to do it right. 

“Yeah, whose house is it at this time?” You asked.

“Namjoon’s house, you know he has that huge ass mansion and his parents are away on some business trip so it’s gonna be a fucking good night.” You could practically hear him shaking with his excitement over the phone.

“Sweet, did anyone get any pick-me-ups?” You asked, closing your laptop and stretching your legs out.

“I didn’t ask but I’m sure someone has something.” He replied. “So be there in an hour and let's live it up.” And with that, he hung up. No further information or even a goodbye, but that was Jungkook for you.

“Crazy bastard.” You mumbled under your breath before going to get showered and ready.

* 

As you pulled up in your taxi to Namjoon’s house you could hear the music blaring from inside the car, you paid and thanked the driver before walking up to the doorstep. You had dressed up a little tonight, rocking a black skirt with black ankle boots and a jumper to keep it a little more casual, however you were showing a lot of leg, which wasn’t usually your style, but you had thought to change things up a little couldn’t hurt. As you pulled down on the handle you weren’t surprised the door was unlocked, stepping in to be hit with the smells of smoke, weed and alcohol you were a little taken aback not expecting the party to be in such full swing already. 

You could never quite believe how big Namjoon’s home was when you walked into it, it was huge with 4 floors and about 10 bathrooms, you had been here countless of times but every time it still shocked you, he wasn’t even the richest out of your small group of friends which was the even more surprising part, you knew Jin’s parents were just as well off and when you went to his house you really couldn’t believe who you were friends with, having lived not the most privileged life. However, the rest of them were not as rich, still rich by your standards but definitely not to this extent which had put you at ease when you were just beginning to know them. 

Them. The 6 best friends you could have asked for, knowing them from childhood you had grown up with them and you were still as inseparable as the beginning.

You walked down the long hallway and saw a few people loitering on the grand staircase but you knew where to find your friends. As you went into the kitchen there they were,  sitting at the table which could seat about 20 people, but it was just the 6 of them, sitting around with their drinks in their hands.

Taehyung was the first one to spot you and he gave you a small cheer

“Look who it is! I saved you a seat.” He said, patting his thigh.

You rolled your eyes, pulling up a chair beside Jin to see him lining himself up a line of something white. 

“Is that coke? Are you going to share?” You asked nudging him slightly. 

“No fucking way, this is the last of it, ask someone else.” He said.

You looked around the table to see them all looking at Jin.

“Jin what the fuck man, we always count on you to have shit, what do you mean that’s the last of it?” Jimin asked from across the table.

Jin looked up from intently splitting the powder into 2 thin lines his brows creased.

“You mean none of you have anything on you?” He said looking around at everyone as they all shook their heads.

“Hoseok I thought you got coke from that new dealer you met at that party?” Jin asked.

“Nah man turned out his product’s dodgy as fuck, I only trust the stuff you get and since you won't give us your dealer's name…”

Jin let out a long sigh.

“Fine fine, I’ll call my dealer to see if he can get me anything in the next hour if not, looks like we’ll be snorting alcohol tonight.” He said with a small chuckle.

“Oh fuck that, he better hook you up, this needs to be a great night.” Jungkook chimed in.

“You can have a good night without it you know.” You shot back.

“Yeah I don’t want a good night, I want a great night, call him Jin.”

Jin took a crisp 20 out of his pocket and began rolling it up.

“Jin! Please, man, I’m begging you.” Jungkook said again after receiving no response.

Jin put his face to the table running the makeshift tube up the line snorting it all at once with one huge sniff and he sat back one holding his other nostril taking a few more heavy sniffs and wiping at his nose.

“Okay fine.” He said breaking out a small smile.

You laughed so hard tears formed, there was something so darkly comical about the event that had just unfolded you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Since you’re the only one that finds me funny around here Y/N you can have the other line.” He said passing it over to you.

You looked at him a little in disbelief, “Really? Fuck, thanks Jin.” You said before sniffing up the line in one swift movement.

You immediately felt the small rush to your head and broke into a small smile.

“Jin! Come on man this isn’t fair! You’re already having a good night and I’m not.”

Jungkook complained again and you smiled a little at his childish behaviour.

“I’m going I’m going. Let me give him a call.” Jin said pushing his chair back and standing up.

Before leaving the room Jin walked over to Jungkook, standing in front of him he stuck his palm out. 

Jungkook looked at him confused.

“You going to pay for your share?” He asked, sounding serious.

Jungkook looked at him in disbelief, “What about everyone else?!” He asked, his voice rising in pitch. Everyone stayed silent, trying not to burst into laughter.

“I’ve got everyone else covered I just want your share.” He said.

Jungkook looked well…distressed for lack of a better word, reaching into his pocket he pulled out a crumpled 10, which Jin plucked out of his hands.

“Thanks man.” Jin said, a small smirk on his face before leaving the room.

Everyone laughed loudly, tears falling.

*

When Jin had returned to the room he gave everyone the thumbs up letting them know his dealer was on his way and would get him sorted in about an hour.

“Jin man you have to give me your dealers number he sounds like an angel sent from heaven,” Hoseok said.

“A little coke angel.” Namjoon chimed in, which gave everyone at the table a small chuckle.

“No way I already told you all. None of you are getting his name or number, you’re all losers and he won’t want to deal with me if I introduce you to him.” 

You knew you should have been offended but honestly, you kind of knew what Jin was saying, he had always been the chilled, cooler one out of the 7 of you, people trusted and respected him because he just radiated that sort of aura, not to mention he was a little older than the rest of you.

Funnily enough, no one argued back, Hoseok just gave a little sigh of defeat and went back to his beer.

*

As the night really began you were definitely having fun, the coke had really kicked in and you began drinking beer to add to your buzz. 

You soon enough found yourself in the huge living room, which was insanely crowded, the music was the loudest in here and before you knew it you were up dancing in the middle of the room, which had kind of become a makeshift dance floor for the night. 

As you got up and began dancing with a few girls you knew, you spotted someone sitting on the edge of the couch who you had never seen before. He wasn’t looking in your direction but the pull you felt looking at him was indescribable. You had never seen someone so beautiful. You really studied him for a moment but you soon realised you didn’t know who he was, which was unusual for you considering you knew or had a least seen most of the people in here at least once before. Just before you went to focus your attention back to the girls - feeling a little stalker-ish for staring – he looked at you, scanning the room he locked eyes with you and you immediately glanced away, mentally cursing yourself out for staring.

As you focused your attention back on dancing you couldn’t help the heat that spread across your cheeks, you still felt like his eyes were burning into you and that was all you could think about. 

That was when you felt a pair of hands snake around your waist, you immediately turned only to be faced with Taehyung, he always got touchy with you when the both of you were drunk, and to be frank you behaved the exact same way.

“Hey, sexy you come here often?” He asked with a small wink.

“Hm, sometimes, what about you?” You said sliding your hands up around his neck feeling a little flirtier than usual, maybe it was the thought of the handsome stranger watching you.

Taehyung didn’t even need to reply, sliding his hands down and resting them at your hips and you began swaying back and forth with him.

After dancing for a while your mind went back to the guy you had saw and you wondered if he was still there, you glanced over to where he has been sitting only to see the space now empty.

“I’m gonna go pee.” You half yelled into Taehyung’s ear before manoeuvring through Namjoon’s large house. 

When you finally reached the closest bathroom it was locked, typical.  By the time you reached the 6th bathroom, you knocked on the door only to be greeted with silence. As you turned to go to the next you one you heard the door opening and turned back around, thankful you could finally pee. 

You turned ready to thank whoever it was only to be stunned into silence to see it was the guy from earlier. You felt frozen in place, looking at him up close was a completely different experience; he really was as beautiful as you had first thought.

He was looking at you with such a cool calm demeanour you almost felt embarrassed about your thoughts. 

“Sorry I just needed to use the bathroom.” You said almost choking on your own words. He gave you a small nod and stepped to the side. You walked passed him to go into the bathroom and as you turned to close the door he was already walking back down the stairs. 

Something in you wanted to call out to him and something in you did call out to him, you realised you didn’t know if he was staying or going and this could be only your chance.

“Sorry, excuse me! Do I know you from somewhere?” You asked.

He stopped mid-step in the middle of the staircase.

He turned to look at you. “No, we’ve never met before, believe me, I’d remember.” The line itself was cheesy but he said in such a way you could have swooned.

“I’m Y/N- Wait actually can we do this after I pee? Wait there one second.” With that you closed the door, you were a little too drunk to even feel shame at this point so after peeing the fastest you could and washing your hands, you got out of the bathroom in record time. When you opened the door you heart dropped a little that he wasn’t there anymore but as you approached the stairs you saw him standing at the bottom of the staircase talking to none other than Jin.

“Hey...” You said cautiously as you approached them both.

Both of them turned to look at you and you stopped short of the bottom step, not really sure what you were interrupting.

“Y/N, hey, I’m just talking to Yoongi here, I’ll meet you downstairs.” Ah, so the mystery man’s name was Yoongi but Jin was being curt with you and to be honest it irked you a little bit.

“Actually I’ve already met Y/N, we just had a nice chat.” He said a small smile on his face.

Jin’s eyes widened a little which confused you; you had chatted up plenty of guys at parties before what was different about this one? 

Then it hit you. 

This was Jin’s dealer. 

You suddenly felt a little stupid, but were dealers supposed to be this attractive? You always pictured them as sketchy older men who always looked twitchy.

Jin was glaring at you and you knew exactly what he was getting at, he did not want you fucking around with his dealer. 

You let out a small sigh before glancing over at Yoongi. 

“I guess…I’ll see you around?” You said, making it sound like more of a question.

“I’m sure Yoongi has better things to do than-”

“Actually,” Yoongi interrupted, “I was going to stay a little while if that’s okay Jin, I saw a few people I recognised earlier downstairs, would be nice to catch up.” He stated.

Jin cleared his throat a little, “Yeah no problem Yoongi, stay as long as you like and thanks again for coming on such short notice.”

You realised you had really overstayed your welcome in their conversation as you turned and began walked down the stairs.

“Y/N!” Jin called from above you. “Your ass is showing, pull your skirt down.”

You felt your cheeks burn as you immediately grabbed your skirt and tugged it down, at least you were wearing a sexy red thong, Jin was lucky for the show, you just prayed to all the god’s Yoongi hadn’t seen. 

*

About an hour had passed and you were back in the full swing of dancing, Taehyung had his hands all over you again and you didn’t even care, you were so coked up it was fucking shameful. 

“You know,” Taehyung was whispering in your ear, “me and you would be so fucking good together.”

You were smiling, eyes closed, still dancing up against him.

You and Taehyung had always had this strange attraction growing up, he always told you he thought you were beautiful and the fact he was offensively gorgeous didn’t help. 

But you saw how he treated women – he would fuck them and never speak to them again, you told yourself that you weren’t going to be another one of his conquests. 

However, that didn’t stop you and him from being make out buddies every now and again.

“Tae…” You whined as you felt his hands digging into your hips a little harder than usual, his actions were definitely getting to you more than they usually did and you could feel your whole body heat up.

He leaned in to kiss you and you immediately returned the kiss letting his tongue slide into your mouth, you began to run your hands through his offensively soft hair.

“Fuck, I want you so bad.” He said, his breathing heavy.

You wanted him too. 

Admittedly it had been a long time from you had gotten laid and to say you were frustrated was an understatement. But it was a bad idea and you knew that no matter how drunk you got.

“Hm, you can’t have me Tae. You know that.” You said, smiling at him solemnly.

“Why is that beautiful? We’ve known each other forever, you could at least give me a little something, you know we’d be great together.” He replied, looking at you with that stupid smirk.

“Taehyung, I like making out with you but I’m never going to go farther than that, there is no together with you, you’re a classic fuck boy, we’d have sex and you’d never look at me again.” You said, sighing heavily.

There was a short time when you had been hopelessly in love with Taehyung, he was beautiful and you had been young and stupid. 

When you saw the sort of person he’d became your romantic love for him had slowly died out, knowing you never wanted that for yourself.

“You really think I’d do that to you? You’re my best friend Y/N.” He said, pouting his big beautiful lips.

You let out a short laugh, “That makes it worse, Tae, just drop it. I’m gonna go get another drink.” And with that you walked away from his embrace, you knew by the time you’d even reach the kitchen he will have already found a new girl to dance with. You loved him but god was he a player.

*

You found yourself sitting at the ridiculously big dining table once again, beer cradled in one hand as you looked around your surroundings, most of your friends where elsewhere but you could see Jungkook chatting up some beautiful girl out of the corner of your eye, you were feeling a little down and you realised it was because your high was slowly beginning to wear off, you needed another little pick-me-up you decided as you stood up in search of Jin. 

You searched the place for him finally seeing him sitting on the couch in living room number two, deep in talk with none other than Yoongi – god damnit, there was no way you could approach that situation and not embarrass yourself, but your low was coming on strong and you knew your night was only going to get worse.

“Hey guys…” you wavered, both heads turning to look directly at you, pulled from their conversation.

“Jin can I see you for a second?” You asked casually, pulling at a strand of your hair, you didn’t know what was making you jittery, the drugs in your system or Yoongi looking at you so intensely you felt your cheeks burning, you must’ve looked like a damn tomato.

“Hey Y/N!” Jin smiled at you widely, he must’ve been more gone than you were.

“Me and Yoongi were talking about music, you like music too don’t you?”

You let out a small laugh, “Yeah Jin…I think most of the population likes music.”

You heard Yoongi let out an airy laugh at your joke, although Jin just kept grinning up at you like he was making perfect sense.

“Okay then! So you talk to Yoongi while I go take a piss, perfect plan.” 

Before you could even begin to protest Jin was already heading upstairs, so with nothing better to do and in your drunken state you decided to plant yourself beside Yoongi. You sat a little too close, as both your knees touched you sat forward, resting your chin on your hand.

“So I’m guessing you two were talking about…let me guess…music?”

Yoongi let out another small laugh, causing you to smile, you liked that sound a lot.

“Yeah… I was just telling Jin about how I like making music, producing ya know? I don’t think he understood a damn word I was saying tho, dudes so blitzed.”

It was your turn to laugh “I think everyone here is blitzed.”

“Yeah sometimes it’s hard being the only sober one at a party, but at least I can take videos of Jin if he decides to get shirtless and dance on the pool table again.”

You laughed loudly this time, “Fuck! Has he really done that before? Do you have pictures, I must’ve missed that one.”

“Sadly no, I didn’t take any I was too busy making sure he didn’t kill himself, I was just dropping something off to him, but no one was else was making sure he didn’t die, so I stuck around a bit.”

“Have you known him long? I can’t believe we’ve never met before.” You said, resting a hand on his knee.

You were being bold and forward and you knew that but you hoped he didn’t mind.

You couldn’t really tell however as he didn’t even react to your advances, simply responding to your question instead.

“A few years, yeah, you’ve probably never seen me, I don’t stick around, I’m usually working.”

“Ah.” You said knowingly, you didn’t know if it was awkward to bring up the fact that he dealt drugs but you also knew he had figured out by now you knew what his ‘work’ was.

Before you could say anything else Jin's voice cut through the room as he made his way over to you both, you jerked your hand away from Yoongi’s knee, knowing it would do nothing but bring you trouble if he saw.

“So, did you guys talk?” He asked planting himself down beside you, a smile still on his face.

“Yeah-listen Jin I gotta go,” Yoongi said, his eyebrows low as he looked intensely at his phone.

Jin began to pout, “Stay Yoon, it’s been so long since we’ve talked like this.”

Yoongi smiled big at him and your heart nearly beat out of your chest then and there.

“Yeah, it’s been good Jin, but I gotta bounce. I’ll see you next time, okay?” When he began to stand up, you found yourself standing with him.

“I can show you out if you want.” You said, nerves completely overtaking you. You can’t remember the last time you really had to work for a guy’s attention like this, you were used to drunken gropes and getting to the sex bit quick enough, but that was all meaningless, drunken fumbles and hungover regrets.

You wanted Yoongi in a completely different way, and you couldn’t just let him walk out the door.

Yoongi nodded, and you walked in front of him making your way to the front door.

You stopped when you reached it, turning to face him, he stopped as well, looking at you, wondering why you stopped.

“I wanna see you again.” You said boldly, this wasn’t you, but you decided it was going to be your only chance.

Yoongi’s eyes widened in surprise at your confession and you shyly looked down at the ground, unable to meet his stare.

When you looked back up he was smirking, but it wasn’t smug.

“I’m really glad you said that.” He began “But wasn’t that guy you were dancing with your boyfriend?” He asked.

It was your turn to be surprised as you took a moment.

“Oh! You mean Taehyung? No, no he isn’t my boyfriend, he’s just a friend, he gets handsy when he’s drunk, to be honest, so do I.”

“I noticed.” Yoongi shot back.

You let out a nervous giggle.

Yoongi was smiling fondly but his facial expression quickly turned hard and cold.

 “I’m sorry, I’m being too forward, I just- I-” You began, but you were interrupted.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, it’s not you, I’ve enjoyed meeting you, a lot actually, but I’m not in the habit of getting to know women like you. I don’t live the safest of lives and I don’t like to drag anyone into it, I’m sorry…”

And with that, he walked out the front door leaving you feeling cold and rejected.

As you walked back in you took a seat on the couch once again beside a very drunk Jin.

“You know,” he began holding up a single finger. “Yoongi is such a great guy…I have known him for so long.” He slurred.

“That’s nice Jin.” You said, not really wanting to talk anymore about Yoongi.

“He just got dealt a shitty hand you know, I doubt he ever wanted to be put in this situation, but if my dad was the head of some terrifying gang slash organisation slash whatever the fuck it is, I would put my head down and do whatever he asked as well.”

“Wait, what?” You asked, curiosity peaking.

“Yeah, I knew him from a class we took together a few years back, we were friends then, but he left college before the first year was out, I guess his dad didn’t approve, wanted him to stay in the family business, ya know? Such a bad situation for someone so intelligent, he had his whole life ahead of him…” He continued.

“You know he’s never even tried any drugs before? I guess when you grow up around that, you see enough to be put off…my heart aches for him sometimes…”

Jin was still talking but you could only hear bits and pieces, completely lost in your own thoughts.

*

The rest of the night was awful, you’d ended up leaving early, almost sober and mostly sad. You couldn’t believe what Jin had told you. 

You still were in shock at Yoongi’s words to you as well, maybe it was just genuine concern on his end…

But the point had been you wanted to get to know him. 

You tucked yourself in, not even bothering to remove anything but your shoes and fell into a deep but restless sleep.

*

Two weeks had passed since that party and for the most part, Yoongi was entirely out of your mind, I mean, after all, you had barely known the guy and you weren’t gonna let one silly drunken moment bring you down.

It was Jin’s party that was on your mind for tonight. Your rich friends usually had some crazy party once a week but you only attended when you could, and tonight it was gonna be a good one.

“So Jin do you want me to come over early with some booze? I can help set up.” You said over the phone to your friend.

“Yes, actually I would really appreciate that Y/N, it’s not like any of the other guys offer to help.” Jin said with a resigned sigh.

You let out a small laugh – “Cmon Jin, you’ve met them all, when would they ever offer to help for anything, lazy bastards.”

It was Jin’s turn to laugh this time, “You’re right I don’t know why I expect any more from them, I may have grown up rich Y/N but my parent’s made sure I knew how to respect those around me.”

You were nodding even though Jin couldn’t see, but he definitely was the most humble out of all the guys, he had been raised right.

“Shall we say seven? The party doesn’t kick off till nine but you can come help me set up and we can drink in peace for a bit before the madness ensues.

You chuckled, “Sure thing Jinnie! See you later!”

You could almost hear the eye roll over the phone before Jin hung up.

*

As you let yourself in – Jin had told you to do so – you took a second to appreciate the modern beauty of the house Jin lived in, it looked so bold and beautiful…very much like himself.

You tucked the bottle of vodka under your arm as you carried a bag of snacks in the other, you knew Jin didn’t need this, he was always more than prepared but you always felt strange showing up to his house empty-handed, maybe it was the fact he had done so much for you.

“Honey I’m home!” You yelled from the hallway hoping Jin would reply and give an indication of where he was in this gigantic house.

You didn’t get a reply. You furrowed your eyebrows in frustration heading for the kitchen so you could at least put the alcohol and snacks down.

However, as you neared the entrance for the kitchen the bag that was holding the snacks ripped, spilling all over the floor you groaned in frustration setting the bottle of vodka down, you got down on your knees and reminded yourself to stop asking for paper bags and just bring a tote with you.

“Fuck,” Was all you breathed out and you began picking things up.

As you started, a pair of hands joined the mission and you sighed in relief.

“I was wondering when you were gonna show your face, were you in there the whole time? You could have answered when I called, also-“ You stopped dead in your tracks as you looked up and realised it was not Jin’s eyes you were looking into.

They were Yoongi’s.

“Uh- oh my god, you don’t have to help I’m sorry, I’m an idiot I thought you were Jin, you know, I was thinking those were so not his hands but I carried on anyway I’m sorry again.” You were speaking from a place of sheer panic, you had no idea how to handle being this close to Yoongi, especially sober.

 Looking at him was an entirely new experience like you were seeing him for the first time all over again.

You were still scooping up the bags of snacks whilst Yoongi helped and as you stood up he stood up with you, his arms full now.

“I’m sorry-“

“You said that already, it’s fine, I’m not just gonna watch you struggle now am I?” He said with a slightest of smirks on his face. God, he really was beautiful.

As you both entered the kitchen you dumped the snacks in the corner of the counter. Of course Jin had an array of more expensive-looking stuff already laid out, but it kept your mind at ease knowing you hadn’t shown up empty-handed.

“Thank you for that.” You said, afraid to meet his gaze. “Why are you h-“ You cut yourself off, embarrassed you had even begun to ask that question, you knew why he was here.

“I mean- where’s Jin? Did he leave you here all alone?” You asked.

“He just had to run upstairs for a second, he should be down any minute,” Yoongi replied and you realised as he spoke he was checking you out.

His eyes skimmed over your body, quick enough that he wasn’t lingering but slow enough for you to notice. 

You weren’t wearing anything fancy although you had to admit you had chosen these jeans because you loved the way they hugged your curves and your camisole had some cleavage on display.. but nothing major.

“Ah okay…well… I guess I’ll get started in the living room. Jin likes me to set up the playlists and everything, he says he doesn’t like the responsibility of being judged by the party music being bad.” You said with a small laugh.

Yoongi just nodded, looking at you with that intense stare. The atmosphere tense, you wanted any excuse to leave the kitchen.

“Maybe one day we can play some of yours!” You said, remembering the small conversation you had with him.

To your surprise, Yoongi’s eyes widened. 

“You remember I said that?”

You nodded, “Of course, I know I wasn’t exactly a model for sobriety, but I wasn’t that bad!”

Then there it was. A smile. A genuine one with even a small laugh.

“Well, I guess you weren’t as bad as Jin.”

Like a scene from a movie, Jin walked into the kitchen right on cue, 

“When was I bad? Why are you two talking about me? Also last question, why was there a bottle of vodka on the floor?” Jin asked holding up the forgotten vodka bottle you had set down when the snacks had spilt.

You merely laughed as you walked on past him, grabbing the bottle from his hands and headed for the living room.

As you played about with the sound system you had regrettably took a few large swigs from the bottle of vodka, trying anything to ease the anxiety you got around Yoongi. It wasn’t a bad anxiety per se, he just made you feel things you weren’t used to, which in turn made you queasy. So you figured getting a little buzzed would help take the edge off. Admittedly drinking vodka raw wasn’t your style, but you didn’t want to interrupt whatever they had to talk about, so here you were.

As you fiddled about with the bass and everything – admittedly you hadn’t one clue what you were doing but it was killing time – you took out your phone to open up your trusty party playlist, always a winner in your book when it came to house parties when you were suddenly interrupted by Jin’s voice.

You nearly jumped out your skin at how close he was.

“Jesus christ Jin! You could've just called me from a distance there was no need to give me a heart attack!” You said, a little on edge. You knew why you were though.

“Sorry, I’m sorry, by any chance…have you got any cash on you?” Jin asked, “I’ve forgotten to take some out of the ATM.”

You nodded, “Yeah I have like 40 on me, is that enough?”

Jin chuckled, then grew serious. “Of course not, look I’m going to have to drive to the nearest ATM, will you keep Yoongi company, I think he likes you and I trust you to be the only one who won’t act strange around him.” 

God if only Jin knew what he was saying.

You gulped and looked up at him “Of course, but don’t be long.”

Jin simply nodded already making it for the front door.

“I should be back in 10!” He shouted from the hallway, not sure who to, maybe the both of you.

You took another big gulp of the vodka scrunching your face up at the way it burned down your throat.

As you decided the best thing was to turn back to the sound system you heard Yoongi clear his throat, letting you know he had come into the living room.

“Hi, sorry…I’m trying to figure this stupid thing out, I act like I know what I’m doing, but in reality, I’m clueless.” You said with a sheepish smile and burning cheeks.

Yoongi looked at you crouched on the floor and returned the smile, “Well maybe I can help…this is probably all I know how to do.”

He crouched down beside you and you felt the heat radiate off him with how close he was, sides almost touching he reached his hands out to the many buttons on the system. He definitely seemed to know what he was doing, you wondered if his fingers were as skilled in other areas…

You shook the idea from your mind trying not to look as flustered as you felt.

“I think that should do it…” Yoongi said, standing up. You stood up with him looking up at him. He wasn’t by any means tall, but compared to you he still had a few good inches.

“Are you gonna play something?” He asked.

You nodded, pulling out your phone and connecting it up to the speaker.

You hit shuffle on your playlist and nodded enthusiastically when the song came out sounding great just the right amount of bass and whatever else it was called.

“Thank you this sounds amazing, Jin will be impressed, as I am going to take sole credit for this.”

Yoongi pouted and you swore your heart skipped a beat. 

“What exactly do I get then?” He asked.

“Anything you want.” You stated, boldly. You knew the vodka was beginning to hit as only the drunker side of you would say something like that.

Yoongi’s entire demeanour darkened at your words, he was 100% picking up what you were putting down, he was looking at you like a damn meal and you honestly loved it.

He shifted back to his neutral expression clearly shaking himself out of whatever daze he had been.

“Maybe I’ll steal some snacks on my way out here.” He joked.

You couldn’t help but pout a little, slightly frustrated that he had changed the topic.

His words from the other night rang in your ears. 

He said he didn’t like to drag anyone into his life, considering it was dangerous; what he did for a living. 

You knew it was probably not the best thing in the world for you to want a drug dealer this bad, but he seriously held no qualities of one, he was just as normal as any other guy, well, except for the fact he was so hot he made your head spin.

But what if you didn’t really care about all that? Although in all honestly, it did scare you a little…but what if you wanted to risk getting to know him?

You were annoyed now, annoying yourself with your thoughts, your mood had soured fast.

“Yeah do whatever you want.” You said offhandedly, turning to walk back into the kitchen. 

He was following you, you could hear him behind you, but you refused to turn around, it was hard acting like you weren’t bothered though, considering you were.

When you finally made it to the kitchen you kept your back to him, setting cups out and trying your hardest to make it look like you were busy.

You heard Yoongi sigh. 

“Did I say something to hurt you?” He asked, but you could tell by his tone that he was on the defence as well.

“No.” You replied curtly, you knew what you were doing, you knew you were being a child but you couldn’t help yourself. You honestly embarrassed yourself trying to basically throw yourself at him but he shut you down every time.

You knew how to take a hint, you needed to leave whatever it was you two had alone, you didn’t want to do anything that would cause him to be uncomfortable, although he had definitely given you some hints that this wasn’t a one-sided thing.

“God, Jin’s taking a lot longer than he said he would, right?” He said. 

You couldn’t see his face but you knew he was grabbing at anything to make the situation less tense.

“Yeah, I’m sure he’ll be back soon though.” Was all you could say.

As if on cue once again, your phone pinged in your back pocket, you pulled it out and saw it was Jin texting you.

7:47PM

Jinnie: i am stuck in traffic, tell yoongi i am sorry, will hopefully be another 15mins! :P

You put your phone back in your pocket and looked up at Yoongi finally, he was rubbing the back of his neck and looking at the ground, clearly distracted.

“That was Jin,” Yoongi lifted his head. “He said he’s stuck in traffic, going to be another 15 minutes, can you wait that long?” 

Yoongi took a second to think before nodding “Yeah I have time.”

You turned your back again, looking at how everything was set out you took another couple of minutes to reorganise and pour some more snacks out into bowls, you honestly didn’t know why Jin went through all this trouble but you weren’t gonna judge him.

As you went to start mixing a cocktail in a bowl, you heard a voice directly behind you.

“You need any help? I feel bad just sitting there.” 

You jumped a little and when you spun around you couldn’t believe how close he was to you.

You were silent, just looking at him for a second and he seemed to be doing the same thing.

“I think I’m oka-“ And just like that he cut you off mid-sentence, only instead of using words, it was his lips on yours.

He pulled away after a quick kiss, trying to gauge your reaction, you searched for any hint of doubt on his face and you think he was doing the same, when you saw none you pulled him in again for a kiss once again.

You immediately wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you.

Yoongi obliged – pushing you a little until your back hit the kitchen counter, pinning you between it and him.

He was kissing you slowly, and it was setting your whole body on fire, he brought his hands to your hips and you took that your cue to slip your tongue inside his mouth, he lightly sucked on it.

You moaned into his mouth, loving every sensation he was giving you.

Yoongi moaned back into your mouth, pushing his body close to yours.

He finally pulled away to catch his breath and you did the same, your head was in the clouds, it had been so long since someone had kissed you like that.

Yoongi spoke first, “I’m sorry about that – I know what I said to you the other night, but you have no idea how crazy you’re driving me.”

“Hmm.” Was all you could say, too dazed to think of a proper reply.

You don’t know who started kissing who again, but this time there was no mercy. You kissed each other so fervently and you even let out a small squeal of laughter when Yoongi lifted you up so you were perched on the counter, he moved in between your legs and you boldly wrapped them around his waist, pulling his as close as you could.

“Fuck, I – jesus –”  Yoongi muttered between kisses.

You shushed him, trying to encourage him to keep doing what he was doing.

You were both panting heavily, so hot and turned on it was sinful.

You had just begun kissing again, completely unaware of the passing of time, when the sound of the front door closing made you both jump.

Yoongi moved away from you and you jumped down from the counter, fixing your clothes and hair as quickly as you could, you prayed you didn’t look a hot mess as much as you felt it.

You looked over at Yoongi who had taken a seat at the kitchen island, you could see his chest still rising and falling and you couldn’t help but giggle a little.

He simply smirked at you and you really couldn’t keep it together as you heard Jin approaching you turned your back to try and make the cocktail you were about to start, you needed a distraction.

When Jin walked in, you heard Yoongi stand up. 

“Hey sorry Yoongi, traffic was crazy.” Jin began. 

“It’s fine man don’t worry about it, me and Y/N were just talking.” He said, as cool and as casual as if that what you both really had been doing.

You were pretty sure if you turned around your face was going to reveal everything Jin didn’t know.

You took a second to catch on what was going to happen and you made yourself scarce, running for the living room with a quick “Excuse me.”

As you sat on the sofa, you pulled out your phone to see you had a missed call for Taehyung, probably wanting to know when the best time was to show up.

You sent him a quick text instead of calling him back.

8:05PM

You: hey tae, party will probably start around 9ish? i think… i forgot to ask Jin actually x

You phoned pinged almost instantly 

8:06PM

Taehyung aka sexy mf ;): okay i’ll leave in an hour then, see u soon ! x

You sighed a little, you kept forgetting to change Taehyung’s contact name, he had taken your phone and made the change when you were at a party with him, you had laughed about it, you never made any effort to change it either.

“Hey.” You suddenly heard from behind you, farther away this time, it had you standing up and spinning around.

Yoongi was standing in the doorway.

“Hey yourself. Please don’t tell me you’re leaving.” You said, walking closer to him.

If you had it your way, he would be fucking you on this sofa right now.

You playfully tugged at his belt buckle, trying to pull him into the living room.

“Come say bye.” You said, looking up at him, eyes full of lust.

You leaned in to kiss him and he returned it, but only for a few seconds.

You never took your hands off his belt, keeping him securely in place.

“Listen, I have to go. I can’t stay, I told Jin I’d let myself out.” He said.

You audibly whined you were so horny you could’ve cried.

“Fuck, please don’t make that sound…I don’t think I can drive with a hard-on.”

You stomach flipped and your core throbbed all at once.

So he was taking it …there.

“Well, I could always help you out in that department you know…” You trailed off.

Yoongi took a deep breath and closed his eyes, clearly trying to compose himself.

“God, you are making me crazy, you know that?” He asked, you knew he wasn’t really looking for an answer but you shook your head anyway, trying to play coy.

“What if Jin saw us like this? I’m pretty sure he would kill me and then kill you.” 

You laughed at his statement.

“He wouldn’t kill me, he likes me too much.” You stated.

Yoongi scoffed a laugh.

“Okay that’s fair enough but I really do have to go, give me your number I’ll text you.” He said, taking his phone from his pocket. 

You called out your number and he saved the contact. 

You didn’t ask for his if he really wanted to text you he would.

You walked him to the front door. 

“I guess we can talk later? About what it is we’re actually doing?” You asked, hopeful.

Yoongi nodded. “Of course. I’ll see you soon.” 

And with that, he was gone.

***

A few hours had passed and the party was in full swing. You were nicely drunk and you were enjoying swaying back and forth as the music flooded your senses.

You had opted to take no heavy drugs, wanting to not be so blitzed incase Yoongi decided to text you before the night was out.

You were dancing when you felt a very familiar pair of hands snake around your waist.

“Has anyone ever told you how fucking great your ass looks in those jeans?” Taehyung whispered in your ear.

You shook your head no. “Well, I’m here to tell you, your ass looks fucking great in these jeans.”

As he started peppering kisses on your neck you pulled away from him.

“Not tonight Tae, I’m not in the mood.” You said you couldn’t, knowing you had only kissed Yoongi a few hours prior.

Taehyung raised his hands in defence, stepping back a little, one of his redeeming qualities – he actually listened.

“My bad, so who’s the guy?” He asked.

You made your way to the couch and he followed suit.

“What guy?” You asked.

“You never let me kiss you at parties if you have some guy on your mind, so who is he?” He asked again.

You shook your head, “There is no guy…” You knew you were a shitty liar, but what were you supposed to say?

Taehyung laughed. “Okay fine, if you don’t wanna talk about him yet I get it.”

You hit his shoulder playfully. “There is no guy jackass!”

“Okay, I believe you!” Taehyung said and if his tone of voice was anything to go by he definitely did not believe you. 

You scoffed, “I am going to pee.”

“Okay, I am going to find a new dance partner.” And with that, you both went your separate ways.

As you made you way up the stairs and found a bathroom, as soon as you closed the door your level of drunk really hit you, what was it about bathrooms that did that?

Enjoying the quiet for a second you pulled your phone out of your back pocket and saw that you had a message from an unknown number.

You let out a small noise of excitement.

11:37PM

Unknown: hey guess who?

You quickly saved his contact.

11:52PM

You: heyyyyyyyyyyyy i knwo who u are ;)

You got a little excited as you saw that he was replying immediately.

11:53PM

Yoongi: hahaahahah how drunk are you exactly?

You: Come to jins party and see,, im not that dru nk

Yoongi: What exactly would happen if I were to come?

You: i cant even pretend to play coy,,, i would suck your dick and beg you to fuck me :) 

You saw the dots rapidly disappearing and reappearing. You laughed out loud, he was clearly at a loss for words.

You wanted him to know you wanted him badly, you needed him to know.

11:56PM

Yoongi: fuckdkkck, that is so hot u are so hot, u know that whole time you had your back to me i was just satring at ur ass in those jeans,.,.,, also the  night we first met.. ur skirt had rid up and you were wearing that red thong..,fuck i couldve ruined u then and there..

You paused, remembering what had happened, you thought only Jin had seen that, but knowing Yoongi had seen it riled you up so much you thought you were going to explode.

You: yoongi please come here i am so horny pleasseeeeeeeee

Yoongi: fucl

Yoongi: fukc i want too but i cant im working im sorry

You left the bathroom, walking up more stairs heading for Jin’s room, you wanted some peace and quiet… and somewhere more private to sext…

Jin’s room was super off-limits at his parties, but you knew he wouldn’t mind you being there.

As you walked in, you kicked off your shoes and propped yourself up against the headboard, phone in hand you smiled as you typed your text.

12:01AM

You: god that sucks so much, i would loveee to pick up where we left off,,

Yoongi: i know :(

Boldly, you switched your phone to its camera. You shoved off your jeans and took a picture of your hand lingering at the waistband on your black laced underwear.

You hadn’t been lying when you said you were horny, you felt insatiable.

You sent the pic, biting your nail in apprehension, this was definitely a bold move for you, but you wanted to get him as frustrated as you felt.

As he took a little while to reply you started to panic, maybe you had been too hasty.

You phone pinged and you couldn’t unlock it fast enough.

12:05AM

Yoongi: are you kidding me right now? Where are you? fuck that is the hottest thing i have ever seen

You couldn’t help but move your hand under your underwear, running a finger down your slit you couldn’t believe how wet you were.

You: im in jins room… its off limits but i couldn’t help myself, if u could feel how wet i am…..

Yoongi: FUCK 

Yoongi: are u touching urself rn???

You: maybe……

Yoongi: jesus hold on.

You gasped slightly when your phone began to ring. Why was he calling you… was he mad?

You answered tentatively.

“Hello?” You said, confusion in your tone.

“Will you let me talk you through it?” Was all Yoongi asked. 

His voice sounding so deep and husky it only turned you on more.

“Talk me through what?” You asked innocently.

“The orgasm I want you to give yourself.”

Fuck.

“Yes.” You practically moaned, applying a little pressure to your clit out of the excitement alone.

“Take your panties off completely, spread your legs, get comfortable.” He ordered.

You did as he asked, panting heavily.

“Okay, how wet are you?” He asked.

“I am so fucking wet, can’t stop thinking about you kissing me.” You replied.

Yoongi cursed under his breath.

“Okay, put two fingers in then, put the phone on speaker, set it beside you.” You did as he asked. 

As you inserted your fingers you let out a little cry at the relief, you had been craving this all night, granted you wanted it to be Yoongi’s dick…

“Feels good.” Was all you could manage to say, closing your eyes tight.

“Okay fuck yourself slowly, rub your clit slowly as well.” 

You eyes nearly rolled into the back of your skull.

You moaned in pleasure, completely in awe of how he was talking to you, he was a fucking pro.

“Want your cock,” you said breathily. “Want your cock in me so fucking bad.”

Yoongi was breathing heavily on the other line. “Fuck fuck – I know I wish I was there so bad. I’d fucking wreck you.”

You only moaned louder at his dirty talk.

“Start moving your fingers faster, put a little more pressure on your clit for me.” He said, hardly able to keep his voice steady.

“Fuck! I think I’ll cum soon.” You said as you did what he asked.

“Hm so soon? God, you must be so fucking needy baby.”

You could only moan at his pet name for you.

You loved being called baby, god you wanted him.

“Keep going, I wanna hear you cum.” He spurred you on.

You were losing yourself. Your orgasm was coming on so quick you were chasing it.

“Y/N? Are you close?”

“Ah- fuck- yes! I’m so close.” You said it was really all you could manage.

“Cum for me, fucking let go, god you are so fucking hot, rub your clit, I bet it’s so swollen, just begging to be sucked on.”

Jesus christ you were going to explode.

You gave yourself a few hard quick strokes before you pulled your fingers out and focused solely on rubbing your clit until you came so hard you were seeing stars.

“Fuck fuck fuck, I’m coming, I’m coming so fucking hard – fuck!” 

You were silent for a minute, trying to come back down after your orgasm hitting you with such a force.

As you came back from your orgasm you had completely forgotten Yoongi was on the other end. 

“Y/N are you okay?” 

You grabbed the phone putting it against your ear.

“Yoongi jesus christ.” You said.

Yoongi chuckled on the other end.

“You just came so hard you were practically screaming. Let’s hope the party guests didn’t hear you.”

Oh fuck, you had completely forgotten where you were.

“I just came on Jin’s bed.” You said biting your lip.

“Yeah you did and it was probably the hottest thing I’ve ever heard, I wish I had been there.”

You were visibly pouting even though he couldn’t even see you.

“Next time.” You said.

“Next time?” He repeated.

“Next time.” You confirmed.

“Fuck… listen I’ve got to go, I wish I could talk more, I don’t like doing that then just hanging up, but I’m really busy. I can call you tomorrow.”

You smiled at how genuinely sincere he sounded.

“It’s fine, we’ll talk to tomorrow. Bye Yoongi.” 

“Bye Y/N.” He said something else in his tone…you hoped it wasn’t regret.

And with that he hung up leaving you to clean yourself up and try and fix Jin’s bed, it wasn’t THAT bad, well maybe except for the small (not that small) wet patch.

[maren-as-an-adult]

The 2020 Experience, Part 2

When I flew back to New York a few days later (yes, I braved the airports and a plane) I could not stop crying. What should have been a loving and heartfelt reunion between myself and Graham turned into an awkward situation for him, with me bent double in the front seat of his car sobbing inconsolably.

And suddenly I had to adjust back to life more or less on my own. I couldn’t have friends come over, my family who lived in NYC were too far for me to get to them without public transit, and Graham’s mother was immunocompromised so we couldn’t spend much time together. I was back to sitting at my computer, taking online surveys for the promise of money and sending out application after application. Jena and Julia, my other two roommates, were still not back, so it was just me and Polina.

Things started to get a little better though. I had applied for Medicaid so I had some health coverage again. I scheduled an appointment with my new doctor, I started talking to a therapist again in August, and I stopped budgeting for birth control and got it for free. The after school program was up and running again, this time remotely (only one of my schools was able to host their program though, so my work hours were still cut). I looked forward to every other weekend, where Graham would drive out and pick me up to spend a few nights at his place. Jena came back and announced she was moving out, and our new roommate Michelle moved in. Michelle and I had a lot in common, and I found it easy to talk to and connect with her.

I even got out to see my family. I braved the subway to see my family up in Astoria, and Polina told me about the ferries I could take that brought me to my family on the Upper East Side.

One day in late September, however, I woke up with abdominal pain. It was pretty mild at first, but it kept getting worse. As someone who has periods, I assumed it was just week-early cramps brought on by stress combined with a poor diet that didn’t include much fiber. I tried to assuage the feeling by eating an apple, but after a quick trip to the bathroom it made a reappearance coming back up the way it went down. I decided to do what most people do (and what doctors hate) and look up my symptoms online to try and self-diagnose. The two big contenders for what I was suffering from were IBS or an ulcer. I texted Graham and told him what was up, and he asked what I was going to do. My current plan was to try and wait it out, and if things still felt bad in the morning, I would go to the ER.

If it wasn’t for Graham’s suggestion that I go to an urgent care center (which I had completely forgot existed at this point in time) I may have died.

At 7:12pm I grabbed my bag and walked three blocks to the urgent care center closest to my apartment. Unfortunately, they were no longer taking walk-ins for the day, but told me that another urgent care center was open until 8 and would take walk-ins.

It was 17 blocks away.

I walked 17 blocks with severe abdominal pain to this urgent care center just to be seen and tell a health professional I wasn’t feeling well. I knew there wouldn’t be much they could do, but maybe they could give me a better idea of what was wrong with me. I called Graham and gave him the address of the urgent care center, asking that he come out to be with me. Whatever was happening to me, I did not want to go through it alone.

I made it to the urgent care center fifteen minutes before they closed. I was taken to an observation room where a brusque young Russian woman took down my vitals and information as we waited for the RN to come see me. When he finally did come in and I started telling him what was wrong, I barely finished explaining what happened after I ate and failed to keep down the apple that he interrupted me saying, “You need to go to the ER immediately, because what you described sounds like you have a GI bleed. You’ll need an endoscopy, where they take a camera on a long, thin tube and feed it down in through your stomach and into your intestines to see if you’re bleeding internally.”

It was getting late, I was alone, and I was TERRIFIED.

I was told where the nearest ERs were, was given a printed referral, and then dismissed for the evening. All I could do was wait for Graham and tell him what was going on... and then call my mother and tell her.

I love my mom. I’ll likely never not love my mom for the rest of my life. But sometimes she takes a bad situation and makes me feel even worse. When I told her I had called Graham to come get me, she pointedly asked why I didn’t call any of my family who lived closer than Graham. Well, of my family who live in the greater metropolitan area of New York City, we have:

- My Aunt Barbara and Uncle Danny, currently NOT in NYC and instead staying out in Milford, PA

- My Uncle Brian, Aunt Corinne, and cousin Nikki up in Astoria. My aunt cannot drive and gets panicked easily, my cousin only has her learner’s permit, and my uncle (though I love him) would not be the most comforting presence to me at the moment, being VERY pro-Trump Republican and a FIRM anti-masker

- My Uncle Mike, Aunt Gloria, and cousins Maura (and her husband Andrew), Brendan, and Kevin. Maura, at this point in time, was nine months pregnant and due to give birth any minute, and I was not going to be responsible for pulling my aunt or uncle away from the birth of their first grandchild

With this information presented to my mother, she did concede that calling Graham had not been a terrible idea. Continuing to fret, however, she said I should at least have called them to let them know what was happening. She took it upon herself to do that, and additionally call my father and tell him (dad was on the road at that point and so missed my initial call of “Hey, jsyk, I’m going to the ER, wish me luck!”). Graham pulled up, I ended my mom’s call telling her I’d keep her posted, and headed off to the unknown.

As we were driving to the closest ER, my dad called. Thankfully, he gave advice that calmed me down. He listened to my symptoms, told me it was likely an ulcer, and told me what would happen when I went in: I’d be admitted to the ER, they’d take my vitals, I’d explain my symptoms over and over and over to multiple people, they’d probably admit me overnight, knock me out and do an endoscopy, and in the morning I’d be sent home with a prescription to help with the ulcer. I felt better.

Graham and I made it to the ER at about 8:45pm. I was admitted immediately, my vitals were taken, I was given a cup to pee in, an IV was placed in my arm, my blood was taken, and I told my story to two different doctors and a few different nurses. I went in for an ultrasound to rule out pregnancy, endometriosis, and ovarian cysts. I waited, with Graham by my side.

The doctor came back at about 11:30pm and told me my urinalysis and ultrasound came back unremarkable, but my bloodwork showed a high white blood cell count, which meant my body was fighting off an infection somewhere. This is absolutely something I did and did not want to hear in the middle of a global pandemic. On the one hand, go immune system! Keep me safe, you beautiful, hard-working bitch! On the other hand, what was it my body was fighting off?

The doctor said if I wanted to leave at that point, I could, because nothing obvious was found. “But,” she said, “I would strongly recommend we do a CT scan just to be safe.”

It was late, both Graham and I were tired, and my abdominal pain wasn’t awful to the point where I was bent double anymore. I could stand and walk around with only a slight discomfort. The thought of getting out of the ER, a frankly dangerous place to be in these COVID times, was deliciously appealing.

“What the hell, lets do the CT scan.”

I was given almost two liters of fluid to drink to prep for the scan. It didn’t taste bad, actually, kind of like a flat lemon La Croix that had been left in its aluminum can too long. At 12:30am I went in for the scan. Two hours later, Graham and I were still waiting for the results. At around 2:30am Graham turned to me and said, “Honestly, I’m ready to go. I won’t leave you here alone, but I’m exhausted and ready to get out of here.” I responded, “Honestly, I am too.”

At that moment, a doctor walked around the corner into our area and said, in a too cheery voice, “Hi there! You have appendicitis.”

I swear in that moment I could feel the cosmic force of the universe tremble with suppressed laughter at this finely crafted moment of ironic timing. My only response to the doctor and Graham was, “Well... I guess I’m staying here for the night?” Remember when I thought it was IBS? Couldn’t we go back to that?

I’ve mentioned before the idea of surgery scares me. I’d hoped I’d only have to experience anesthesia from getting my wisdom teeth removed. I fully expected to break down in hysterics then, but I guess I was just too tired and overwhelmed to react in such a big way. I called my mom and told her what was happening, and the first suggestion she made was for me to come home and heal in Chicago.

...mom, I love you, but getting on a plane immediately after major surgery in the MIDDLE OF A GLOBAL PANDEMIC FROM AN AIRBORNE VIRUS is frankly the DUMBEST IDEA EVER.

After realizing that would be a bad move, she suggested she come out to be with me while I heal. While an appealing process, it ultimately wouldn’t be of much use, because she’d have to quarantine for two weeks before seeing anyone at that point. Eventually, she offered to book a hotel room for me and Graham for a long, extended weekend to help me recover. It was extremely generous of her, and I’ll forever be grateful she did it.

I was hooked up to antibiotics to prep for surgery, and the attending surgeon explained the procedure to me. Everyone was so calm and sure of themselves that I felt okay, and the inevitable wave of panic was held off. At 4:30am, I was wheeled up to the operating room. Graham stayed by my side as long as he could and walked all the way to the doors of the OR hallway with me and the attending. I made sure he and my mom had each others’ phone numbers so he could give updates. I was wheeled through the doors, and met with my operating team.

The anesthesiologist and practicing surgeon assured me that they felt fine, well-rested, and at the top of their game, and I was able to relax some as I moved off of my gurney onto the operating table. Once I was on the table, clad only in a thin hospital gown and gripper socks, my body started to shake. Whether it was from the cold or the panic had finally set in I wasn’t sure, but I calmly told the doctors that I thought my fight or flight response was kicking in, and they might need to consider restraining my shaking limbs.

They did, and they also put a heated (and somewhat weighted) blanket over me which relaxed me so my limbs weren’t shaking so violently. An oxygen mask was placed on my face, sealing my nose and mouth into a thick plastic chamber. I tried to breathe deeply and evenly, forcing myself to think of pleasant thoughts and not spiral into a headspace of worst case scenarios. I think what helped most was actually an attending nurse reading out loud my patient chart for posterity and recording’s sake, and he said, “Patient is a twenty-seven year old female named Maureen Ford.”

The annoyance I felt at being misnamed (again as Maureen) cut through the second wave of panic buildup, and my only goal was to correct him. The oxygen mask muffled my voice, but I like to think if you were to listen to the audio recording of my surgery, you would hear, very faintly in the background, me indignantly stating, “It’s pronounced MAREN!”

My last thought before I went under was that I need to make sure that nurse was corrected.

When I woke up, I felt more comfortable than I had in a very long time. The only thing that kept me from being in a total state of comfortable bliss was the slowly incoming knowledge that my mouth was drier than the Sahara desert at noon in July. Despite this, and the residual effects of the anesthesia still in effect, I was pleased to find that not only could I clearly hear and understand the conversations happening around me, I could also coherently speak and communicate with people. I asked for water as soon as I could, and the nurse told me that they’d have to work me up to water. We’d start with a lemon swab in my mouth, followed by ice chips, and then I could get water. The attending surgeon came in to tell me the surgery went smoothly without complications, and I asked her if she could make sure whoever called me Maureen was corrected on my name pronunciation.

I really hope it wasn’t written off as a sleepy patient’s delirious request, because I was absolutely serious about it.

After eating some very powdery eggs and drinking an apple juice, I was discharged and told to get my medications, rest up, avoid lifting anything over 15 pounds, stay away from submerging my sutures in water, and to schedule a one week post-op follow up with my primary care provider and a two week post-op follow up with the attending surgeon.

Graham drove us back to Bay Ridge, and I gave him my keys to go grab some essentials from my apartment. I gave Michelle and Polina a heads up that he was coming up (and I had let them know what was happening before I went into surgery) and that I’d be gone recovering through the weekend and partway into the week. They both wished me a speedy recovery, Graham grabbed a few essentials for me, and we drove up the street to pick up my meds from Rite Aid.

For some reason, they had only filled two of the four prescriptions. One they didn’t fill because it was a controlled substance and the hospital hadn’t submitted the proper authorization for it, and the other prescription (one of two laxatives) I have no idea why it wasn’t filled. Eventually, I got both my pain medications and one of the laxatives, with the other laxative to be filled and picked up at a different Rite Aid, closer to Graham’s work.

Exhausted, sore, hungry, and (in my case) in desperate need of a shower, we made it back to Graham’s to spend one more day there before going off to the hotel my mom had booked us. Graham had been scheduled to work that day, but after calling into the office was told he should only come in if he thought it was absolutely necessary. He ended up catching a few hours of sleep before going in for the late shift at work. I managed to take a shower and fell asleep on his couch as his bed was too soft and sent my abdomen into absolute agony. I blinked in and out of consciousness for the next few hours, waiting for Graham to come home with my last bit of medication. In that time, my dad called to check on me and ask how I felt, what I was prescribed, and what was expected of me. As we were talking Graham called, and I excused myself so I could answer the call. Nothing could have prepared me for what Graham was going to say to me.

“I was just hit by a truck.”

*click*

[ordinarytalk]

STUFF I LEARNED AS A 911 DISPATCHER

Wednesdays and Thursdays are the busiest days. It seems to peak around Thursday.

Saturday is very chill until around mid-afternoon or evening, and Sunday is so quiet that almost everyone brings in movies to watch, and we order out for breakfast.

The morning is all traffic accidents and security alarms and medical calls, and sometimes a domestic dispute or two. It gets quiet around noon because everyone's eating lunch and then getting sleepy after eating lunch. After three it picks up again. Fights and shoplifting starts to happen. Late afternoon is Crime Time.

Things get slow after 7pm. You can get a Real Bad call, like a shooting or a break-in, but those are really rare.

Overall, nice days in summer are the crimeiest. Gross days in winter are the slowest.

People are convinced that every raccoon or fox is rabid, especially if it's out during the day.

People going door to door for any reason get so many police called on them

Landscapers and contract workers get so many police called on them.

If you call the police for an injured wild animal, they aren't gonna rehabilitate it, they're probably going to put it down. If you want it rehabilitated, call an animal rescue.

You can ask 911 the number of an animal rescue, but whether you get the number depends entirely on the mood of the calltaker and how busy they are. Plus, we are literally just googling it, the same thing you'd do.

No one here is the expert you think they are. Holy shit, no. People can get this job straight out of high school.

No, I can't turn your power back on. Yes, I know there's a power outage. I'm not the power company. Call the power company. I can dispatch an officer out there but all they're gonna tell you is to call the power company.

People will still ask for an officer to come out so they can complain about their power being out. The officer will tell them to call the power company.

There is no directory or nationally agreed-upon way to transfer a caller to another police department, especially in another state. I have transfer buttons for surrounding counties and I have a list of phone numbers of all the 911 centers in the state, but for police departments in other states? I literally can only google it and pray they have a website with a phone number somewhere, all while the caller's panicking on the line because their uncle in Florida might be choking to death or something. It's terrifying! I hate it! Half the time if there's a phone number it doesn't work or it leads to a recording asking the caller to call 911. I AM 911. WHO DO I CALL?!

"This isn't a real emergency but-/I'm so sorry for bothering you but I didn't know who to call/Is this the non-emergency line?" Don't care, all calls come to the same center, I literally just got off the phone with some grandpa who wanted a police officer to tell his neighbors he doesn't like their dog, please just tell me what you need. So many people lead with an apology. About half of all calls from the public start with an apology. Just tell me what you need. I am so sick of hearing people apologize to me for making me do my job that I am paid for.

Fire/Ems dispatch is a sausagefest. I kinda want to learn how to do it, but they're all the super bro sports fan man grunt types and I can only imagine how uncomfortable my queer nerd ass would be there.

Like only 1% of the crime and fires and accidents that happen make it on local news. Probably because most of it is small stuff, but not always. I've seen straight-up murders and bank robberies didn't make the news.

Speaking of, news agencies listen in on police radio if they're bored. If something happens, they'll call us and try to get more information on it. We're not allowed to give them information and they know that, but they're hoping to be answered by someone new and untrained who'll say something. We would be fired if we gave them any info, and news agencies know that and do not care, and they'll use any underhanded tactics from lying to begging to threats to try to get their story. News agencies will sell you to satan for one corn chip.

I work a 12-hour shift with two 15-minute breaks and a 30-minute lunch. Outside of those, I am not allowed to leave my desk. Assume that every minute not spent on one of those breaks is a minute spent needing to pee.

I wake up at five am on work days. I hate this.

Technically the emergency telecommunicators are supposed to be represented by a yellow line, like how police are represented by a blue line and the fire department is a red line. During telecommunicators week in April, they always send around this horribly schlocky poem about how we're "the thin band of gold" that's keeping emergency responders safe, and every time I can't help thinking of us as the thin yellow streak.

I've lost the ability to concentrate on things for any length of time, because I spend twelve hours every workday unable to concentrate on things for any length of time. There's enough downtime between calls or radio requests that you get bored and can start reading or doing something, but you'll be interrupted after 15 seconds - 1 minute. It's like that story, Harrison Bergeron, where people had to wear headphones that played a loud noise every few seconds so that they're unable to hold a thought for more than an instant. I was interrupted by one phone call and four officer radio messages while writing that last sentence. I've been writing this post almost all day.

[howaboutleeches]

one needy request: following captain!MC and captain!julian’s encounter in the tavern, they party on either on Mc’s or Julian’s ship and spend the night teasing, building ENORMOUS sexual tension like eye contact, mc noticing details about him dhxhshsv but also getting to know one another and their crew... all perhaps leading to a smut or any sort of tension relief satisfaction? up to you, tho im sure whatever you choose to do t’ll be eyecandy 🌸👀

"Are you a good man, Captain?" Julian x Reader (pt.2)

Warnings: Smut, NSFW, sexual tension

Part 1

Word Count: 3,839

On the last chapter....

"Captain! We won!" Jackie bursted into the room and Julian turned his head while I ducked to the side to look at her "Ooooh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were, well, yeah. I'm, uh, going down and, well, see ya!"

We kept looking at the door until the sound of her footsteps were nothing but a simple memory. We stared at each other again and starting laughing, still holding onto one another.

"Now that was a mood breaker" I pressed my forehead against his chest and he sighed.

"Well, I'm sure we'll be able to continue our fun another time"

My eyes went wide and I smiled at him "We are having a party tonight at my ship, you and your crew should come!" I realized I sounded to excited and fake coughed "I mean, only if you want to"

He laughed lightly and kissed my cheek "It'll be my pleasure, darling"

I let go of his clothes and walked past him, going out of the room, but stopping before he vanished from my sight "Maybe you can show me how bad you are"

I ran down the corridor, rushing down the stairs, excited and giggling like a teenager. I couldn't wait to tell Jackie all the juicy details.

Now....

"Ah, I just can't believe I ruined that! Captain, you were finally gonna get some!" Jackie said loudly enough to turn some heads in our direction.

"Keep it down, I don't want everyone to know about my personal life" I led her by the arm to the street, going outside of the crowded bar.

"So, do you have anything in mind? I mean, he looks like a piece of work. The type that likes to keep things interesting"

She wasn't wrong. By the little time I spent with him I noticed that he was the type that liked to be surprised. Dull wasn't his thing. I wanted to make a good impression on him, not gonna lie. But I still didn't want to seem desperate.

"Not really. I don't want to overdo it, but I definitely want to show my interest. What do you suggest?" I trudge Jackie with my life, and she always had success on her love affairs, so why not ask her?

"You know what? Go to the ship, take a nice bath, dress nicely and spray some perfume. I'll take care of the rest" Her mischievous grin made a chill run down my spine.

"Can't you at least tell me what you're thinking?"

"Sorry Cap, no can do. Now go and get sexy" She started pushing me to walk faster and I did, a little grumpy for not knowing what her plan was about.

After a few minutes walking on the dark and calm streets, I saw my ship. The beautiful Enchantress, lit by the moonlight. It was a "family inheritance", since all my ancestors before me were pirates as well. My parents retired, saying that piracy life wasn't for them anymore, and gave me the ship. Even though I was quite young at the time, I still managed to select a very good crew, sail and manage it with grace.

The ship itself had been strictly taken care of. I have visited many ships during my years as a captain. Invitations to raids, parties or just drunken talks were quite usual for me. And that gave me the chance to take a look at other captains ships, making me feel proud of my own. There was usually blood, oil or even piss on the deck, making it unbearable to stay on the deck for more than fifteen minutes.

My beautiful Enchantress, on the other hand, was vigorously scrubbed almost every day and, to my surprise, the crew actually enjoyed doing the cleaning. Some of them had some experience with ships and claimed that they always wanted to keep the place organized, but their former captains required other types of services from them, leaving no time for cleaning. It was a relief for them to be able to work in a nice smelling place.

As I entender the ship, the soft smell of the ocean entered my nose and I could help but feel I little bit more relaxed. I strutted towards my cabin, the captain's cabin, and started taking some of my ornaments off. Hat, bandana, necklace and rings were all off and laying on the bed next to my recently removed sword. I noticed a stain on my shirt and leaned down to smell it, instantly regretting it. Booze and probably piss. It probably got there when I was crawling behind the counter.

And then it hit me. Shit! Captain Devorak probably smelled that on me. And now he must be thinking that I'm a drunk that pees on myself. I ruined everything. Damn it. Changing clothes was the best option that crossed my mind and I decided to oblige to it. Taking off my pants and dirty shirt, and throwing them on the dirty clothes bucket, I opened my wardrobe to find...almost nothing. Literally, almost nothing. The piece of clothing was almost nothing. On one of our scavenging hunts to Danog, Jackie stole this, well, night lady worker's dress and told I would look marvelous on me. Of course, marvelous wasn't the word that she used.

And now that was the only piece of clean clothing left on my wardrobe. I couldn't wear something dirty, especially after the booze and piss incident. That would have to do for the night. I gave light pats on the dress in case there was any dust on it and started to put it on. At first it was a little uncomfortable, since the outfit had many holes on it and I didn't exactly knew how to put it on. After five agonizing minutes, the dress was on and I looked at myself on the mirror, not recognizing the person staring back.

The dress wasn't short, but it had an opening in it that went from my feet to the middle of my thigh. Its fabric was very light and soft, making the dress dance with the slightest presence of wind. On the chest part, it was indeed very exposing. It showed off almost all my chest, and if I bent down, that's exactly what would happen. It had no sleeves, except for a very thin strap holding the whole dress on my body. It was definitely not my style, but it had to do for tonight.

As I kept preparing myself, I could hear people getting on the ship and going lower deck, towards the little saloon that we had. I couldn't help but to hear Jackie and the Captain speaking to each other, quite loudly actually. They seemed very excited. I love Jackie with all my heart, but sometimes she just can't hold her tongue. Once, she sold off all our plan to the Royal Navy and it ended up bloddy. Of course, is not the same situation, but still, I should get there fast.

I put on my classy shoes and exited the cabin, rushing downstairs. As I went down the stairs I slowed down in order to analyze the room. The music was loud, the room was filled with laughter and bottles were being lifted everywhere. I gently strolled down the stairs and heads slowly turned to watch me. There was a lot of whispering and a few shy whistles were heard here and there. I couldn't help but feel embareased and I quickly tried to find a distraction. I ran my eyes along the room and grabbed a rum bottle lifting it up while flashing a smile.

"TO PIRACY!" Excited screams and clincking bottles where heard from everywhere. Soon, other things were heard. "To money, to power, to women, to a good fuck" and so the saloon was filled with laughter and music again. I could help but to notice a tall man, speaking loudly at one ot the tables as a small crowd gather around to hear what he had to say.

"...and so he stared at me in the eye and said "I bet you could do that blindfolded" and so I did" A few gasps were heard as Julian finished his story and leaned back on his chair.

"Did you really walked on a lake of piranhas blindfolded?"

"And with your hands tied?"

"Sure did" He grabbed a cup and started chugging on it.

"Now that's impressive" He chocked on his drink as my voice reached his ears. He immediately put his drink down and sat up straight.

"Captain (Y/L/N)! How delightful to see you! Oh my, you are absolutely stunning tonight. Looking like a real mermaid" He tripped on his own words as he tried to talk to me. Maybe it was the drinks, or maybe something else.

"So, tell us more about your many dangerous adventures" I sat down opposite to him, slightly bending over the table and watching his gaze fall down to my cleavage "I like a little danger" I grinned.

"How funny, I, um, I can't think of any more stories right now. How odd" He cleared his throat "Well,well, I'm gonna get some fresh air, if you don't mind" And then he left, hands shaking and ears turning red.

"You know he's into you, right?" An old lady said to me, probably part of his crew.

"What do you mean?"

"Haven't seen him behave like that in a long time. And we've been on the same boat since he wore diapers"

"Since he- what?"

"Doesn't matter. Go after him, kid" She gave me a daring smile and patted my shoulder.

"How impolite, I haven't even asked your name" I extended my hand to greet her.

"Mazelinka. And I know exactly who you are. Now go, you're wasting time" She shooed me away from the table and I left the lower deck going outside and feeling a soft and salty breeze on my face.

I felt the bottom of the dress swerling around and it tickled my legs a little. I liked that feeling. I couldn't help but to do a little twirl. It was definitely a change for me to wear something like this and I was a nice change of scenario.

"I think I changed my mind. You look more like a fairy than a mermaid. And yet, your beauty exceeds all others"

Julian was leaned against the mast and only turned his head to look at me. His coat was off and his hat was far back on his head, exposing his whole face and the front part of his hair. He wore tight black pants with a white loose shirt tucked in it. What a sight.

"I can say the same for you, Devorak. You look absolutely stunning under the moonlight" I lifted my eyebrow at the sight of his red cheeks by using his own compliment against him.

For a moment, the only things that could be heard were the sound of the waves hitting the boat, my shoes hitting the wooden floor and our clothes dancing in the wind. I positioned myself in front of him and stared at his face. He tried his best avert his gaze from my face, but I grabbed his chin and made him stare at me.

"You're making me confused, you know. You flirt, you get me all worked up and then you just shy away. What do you want from me, Captain?" I stared deep into his eyes.

He started to mumble nonsense and I couldn't help but to chuckle. He was so shy and yet so bold. I remembered Mazelinka's words and did something on impulse. I moved my hand from his chin to the back of his neck and pulled his head towards me.

He was definently taken by surprised, since he didn't move for a few seconds. But eventually his bold side took over and he grabbed me by the waist, pressing your bodies together. I could feel the temperature rising and the kiss was getting more and more intense. His hands dared to explore more of my body and eventually ended up on my ass. I let out a little gasp that made him chuckle. He forced my body to the side, exchanging positions and pressing me against the mast.

"You have no idea how much I wanted this" He muttered as he slowly kissed your neck.

"I can make things even better" I pushed him, making Julian tumble backwards. My intention was for him to think he would fall but at the last second feel the starboard hit his back. But instead, his feet got tangled in some rope and his body changed the course towards an small opening on the boat. He was actually going to fall.

I rushed to him, the dress making things more complicated, and held a rope attached to the ship with a hand and his waist with the other. He looked absolutely terrified but after realizing he wasn't actually going to fall, he stared laughing and so did I. What really wasn't expected was a loud caw behind me. A crow's caw. I got startled and lost my balance, making me let go of the rope and making both of us fall in the direction of the sea.

It was a matter of instants before we could feel the cold water surrounding us. The dress made it harder to emerge, but I managed anyway. When I got my head out of the water, Julian was already there, almost out of breath, laughing.

"Wait, you're not...angry?" He looked at me, still laughing.

"Are you serious? Why would I be mad? I'm having a nice time with a beautiful girl and now things just got more interesting."

I started to laugh with him and swam closer to his body, embracing and kissing him again. Since we were out of breath, the kiss didn't last very long before we were almost passing out for lack of oxygen.

"We should swim back. We might catch a cold" He agreed with my statement and we both raced back to the docks, shivering, and then entering the ship again.

We were greeted by Jackie who had a very mischievous grin on her face and her hands laying on her hips.

"Having a good time, Captain?" She failed to hold back a giggle.

"Absolutely" As I passed through her I managed to whisper "Make sure we are not disturbed, please...until morning"

"Aye aye, Captain" And with that she left.

I guided him to the cabin and after getting in, I discreetly locked the door. Even though I had warned Jackie, that was always someone who had a complaint or some gossip and decided to tell me on first hand. Better safe than sorry.

"Soooo...what do we do now?" He was standing awkwardly in the middle of the room, staring at me like a wet dog.

"Well, I had some ideas in mind" I waltzed around the room, putting out the fire on most of the candles, leaving the room very poorly lit "First, we should undress"

I turned around and, even if the room was almost as dark as the night, I could sse that Julian was blushing. I laughed and grabbed a bucket from the floor, extending it to him.

"Our clothes are wet. Unless you wanna catch a cold, you should undress. Then I'll give you a blanket and maybe we can chat. How does that sound?"

"Marvelous" He grabbed the bucket and turned around. I grabbed another bucket myself and turned around as well.

As the clothes left my body I felt a cold breeze rushing through it and a chill ran down my spine. A soft moan left my mouth and I heard a grunt behind me. A tall mirror was close to me, in an angle that allowed me to see the naked body close to me. He had his clothes off, except for his trousers and his hand was laying on top of a bulge on it, gently stroking.

I couldn't help but bite my lip. It was wrong to watch him, but he looked so helpless and fragile. So needy. He let go of his erection and threw his head back, slightly turning it to the side. It was a matter of seconds before our eyes met in the mirror. I smirked at him and he did the same, with red painted on his cheeks.

I turned around and so did he. Our naked bodies, only covered by our undergarments facing each other, and for a moment, neither of us knew what to do. I stretched my arm and my hand cupped his cheek. His head leaned agaisnt my hand, like a puppy seeking for comfort. I ran my hands through his hand and gave it a small tug.

His lips parted in pleasure and I knew exactly what he liked. I pulled his head so that we could be on the same level and kissed him hard. Soon, his not-so-shy hands started to rub circles on my waist, gently pressing our bodies against one another's.

"Come. Lay with me" He just nodded eagerly and let me guide him to the massive bed covered in red silk sheet underneath the thick fur of the blankets.

I pushed him into bed and appreciated the sight. I've lost count of how many times he had blushed, but he still managed to keep the cherry color on his cheeks. His skin was pale and his chest was covered in hair. He was biting his lips so hard that I though they would start bleeding soon. I knew exactly what he wanted and deserved. And I was going to give it to him.

I left him waiting on the bed a little while longer and walked graciously to the nightstand. Opening the drawer, some items could be found inside. Rope, a piece of red cloth and an expensive massage oil I had acquired during one of my trips. Just what I needed.

"Now this is what you're going to do for me. You're gonna sit on the bed, rest your hands on the headboard, spread your legs, and be a very good boy"

He followed every one of the commands quickly, and soon, his wrists and ankles were tied to bed, his mouth had a made up gag and I was sitting on his lap, naked.

I reached for the oil and slowly opened the bottle, dripping its content on my hands. I placed the bottle on top of the nightstand and rubbed my oily hands over my body. I started at my chest, rubbing circles on my breast while staring intensely into the captain's eyes. They were begging me to touch him. But not yet.

I ran my hands lower and spreaded the oil on my things, each one on the sided of his body. Every now and then I brushed my fingers lightly against his sides just to tease him a little bit. Seeing him squirm under my touch was very pleasant, I had to admit that.

After the front part of my body was shining with oil, I decided to take some pity on the pirate and lossened up the cloth wrapped around his mouth, making it possible for him to talk properly.

His mouth was wet and red, a little swollen, probably from biting on his lip. Which was exactly what he did again, running his eyes over my body, also licking his lips on the process.

"Please let me touch you. I'm begging, please" He lunged forward, being restrained by the ropes, only inches away from my face. He had a desperate expression on his face.

"Not now, bunny. But you will have your time soon. Right now" I slided my hands down his chest "I wanna have some fun with you"

I leaned down and trapped his bottom lip between my teeth, pulling back a little, forcing him to come along. I placed my hand on his neck, and the other one gripped his underwear, pulling it down skillfully. He hissed as a cold breeze hit his region, making it stiffen and rise a little.

I used the little portion of oil left on my hand to rub him down, earning back a chocked moan from his throat. I stroked his shaft up and down in a painfully slow motion, making him buck his hips in response. I chuckled a little and my mouth traveled to his neck, giving it soft nibbles and slight butterfly kissed. I trailed my tongue along his chin, and a little bit lower, trying to find a soft spot.

When he groaned I knew I had found it. I bit him right on the spot and he moaned pornographycaly. His wrists kept trying to break free, which made me realize just how desperate he actually was. He just had to take it just a little while longer.

I braced myself on his shoulders and stared deeply into his eyes as I pushed him into me. We never broke eye contact, even as we started moaning, our mouths hanging open and I staterd to bounce on top of him. The only option he had to relief a little of his heat was to buckle his hips as hard as he could, slamming himself into me. I had to hold both my hands on his shoulders to keep myself from falling of his lap.

The pleasure was way to intense, and I just couldn't take his pleading eyes anymore. I leaned back to untie his ankles and he thrusted his hips firmly up, making me almost loose balance and scream of pleasure at the same time. After his legs were free, I started working on his wrists, which was hard given he hadn't stopped his work down there.

Not even after two seconds after he was free, he embraced my back lunging forward and sitting with his knees pressed against the bed, holding me close to him, like our bodies were one. He still thrusted into me, our means mixing together and we stared at each other's eyes. He kissed me deeply and laid me softly on the the bed. Finishing himself inside of me. I finished soon after and he detached himself from me and pulled me to his chest, caressing my back and planting a soft kiss on my forehead.

"You're beautiful. And I mean it. You're special. I want to be with you" I looked up at him, a soft and genuine smile forming on my lips.

"I want that too"

///

Six months later, your belly was starting to get heavier. You felt a soft pain in your stomach and let go of the ship's wheel, but a pair of firm hands came from behind you and used one hand to hold it and the other one laid on top of your baby belly.

"I told you many times already," He kissed my cheek "go back to bed. You need rest"

"Rest my ass. I'm still capable of running this ship. I'm no less of a captain just because I'm pregnant"

"I know it, darling, but the ships now has two captains for a reason. When one isn't available or not feeling well, the other one takes over"

I sighed. There was mo point on arguing with him.

"I know, bunny, I know. I'll go, okay?" I kissed his hand and strutted to the deck, encountering Mazelinka on the way.

"How's that baby mama going, huh?" She gave you that smile you loved.

"Actually, better than I expected. Some occasional pains, but it's part of the process, I see it now"

"Very well, that's good. Julian told me to keep an eye on you. Now off to bed" She pointed to the captain's cabin.

I groaned to her in a pleading way but she kept her posture. I walked grumpily and she followed right behind. I pulled the sheets and laid down, eventually trying to pull the sheets, but I couldn't reach it because of the belly. Mazelinka grabbed the sheets and covered me, giving me a kiss on the forehead.

"You're a strong woman. You'll be a strong mother too"

And with that, I fell asleep, content.

Author's note: I loved doing that one, and I loved to see that at least one person liked it and asked for more. Thank you for your support 💞

[let-it-raines]

Love your prompts! If it's still open - CS and baby's first xmas?

I’ve gotten quite a few of these, so if you’ve sent me one, I hope this is okay as the answer, even if it’s not your original ask. Canon is not my cup of tea, but I try and take a few liberties. Also, holy holiday fics, you guys :D

There’s a large tree in their living room, green branches smelling of pine and lit up by multi-colored lights with colorful baubles hanging on the branches. At the top rests a star and at the bottom rests boxes wrapped in colorful paper like the baubles all tied up with ribbons. Above the fireplace there are four red and white stockings, each one respectively inscribed with the names Killian, Emma, Henry, and Hope, and on the front door there’s a wreath, fake red cranberries sticking out of the vibrant greenery. At night, and only at night, there are white lights lit up that are strung across the rooftop, something that caused him a hell of a lot of annoyances and pains until he said screw it and asked Emma to flick her fingers and string the lights so that he wasn’t climbing atop their pointed roof while white snow covered the black shingles.

His entire home looks like festivity vomited on it – a phrase Emma has assured him does not match up with the Christmas holiday – and while a part of him can’t help but think that they’re going to have to take this all down, he mostly thinks that it’s as magical as his family is.

And he means that literally.

His family is actual magic, the kind written about in storybooks and spell books and projected across the television screen in fantasy, but to him, it’s all real.

He didn’t celebrate Christmas in the Enchanted Forest – he definitely didn’t celebrate in Neverland – but there were similar holidays. The firelight festival was held in the winters in certain kingdoms. Candles would be lit to imitate Christmas lights, though no one knew that at the time, and they’d line the streets while people stood outside and sang songs and traded goods and food while drinking ale. It was bloody wonderful the few times he got to celebrate, but he spent most of his winters out at sea, whether he wanted to or not.

But then he came to Storybrooke and met a woman – though he didn’t exactly meet Emma here – and everything changed.

There was no time for holidays his first few years here, not that he would have been invited anyways, but in the last few years, things have calmed and everyone has been allowed to celebrate whichever holiday they please.

What Emma pleases is Christmas.

And he’d do anything to make Emma happy, including stringing lights on the roof of their house and ordering a Santa Suit online so he could play Santa for all of the children in town when no one else would do it. He looks absolutely nothing like whoever Santa Claus is – though he thinks that may be one character who isn’t real – and he’s not sure any of the kids believed it, especially when Alexandra asked why he sounded like Killian.

Last year, Emma had been six months pregnant during December, and she was ready to get a move on things. He can’t begin to count the amount of times he caught her muttering about speeding along the pregnancy, wanting to fit into her jeans again, not having to pee in the middle of the night, and finally, getting to meet their daughter. It was an adventure like all of their other ones, and his quests to the market in the middle of the night to buy her chocolate ice cream only to have to return with pickles instead were a quest if he ever went on one.

But it was always worth it. He’d come home with the goods she wanted, and sometimes she’d eat them, other times she wouldn’t, but it always ending up with them in bed watching late-night television. He thought he knew Emma before, thought there was very little left of her book to be read – though he’d never tire or rereading it and discovering new passages he might have missed the first time – but then during those nights, he’d learn more about his wife than he ever thought possible.

She took to resting against his side, her body pressed against his from shoulder to toes, while his arm wrapped around her waist and either played with the loose strings of her hair or found itself resting on her ever-growing belly. Hope was quite the kicker, always moving around, and they both found comfort in feeling her move. During those late nights, especially around Christmas time, Emma would share a little more insight into how she felt growing up alone, all of the hopes and dreams she had about what Christmas could one day be like. He understood it all, childhood memories of wanting and wishing for more and for different in the back of his mind.

They weren’t in the past anymore. They were in the here in now with a bright future ahead of them, a happy beginning really.

So the things they talked about weren’t always melancholy. Emma would teach him more about the music she likes, varying between Motown and Rock of the past and the Pop music of today. He quite liked the classical, the ones without words, but Emma only liked those for background noise. So they’d take to talking about music or movies or television shows, which always lead to real life stories that gave him peeks into his wife’s mind.

Then, without fail, he’d be weaving her an intricate tale only for him to look down and hear soft snores against his chest.

He’d smile before leaning down and kissing her forehead and her stomach, wishing his loves a good night’s rest while he watched over them both.

But this year Emma is not pregnant, and they have a lively little bundle of energy bouncing around the house. Well, actually, she’s crawling and can prop herself up to stand with a few steps that get a little longer every day. From all the books he’s read, and it was a lot, she’s progressing just fine, if not the slightest bit advanced…or maybe that’s just his thinking. He’s biased, but his daughter is bloody brilliant and has been since the day she was born.

Gods, that was a beautiful moment.

Bloody and loud and uncomfortable, but beautiful.

He hears Emma’s footsteps pad down the staircase. From the way she’s walking, she’s avoiding the creaks, but he knows that she’s still going to hit the one on the left five steps from the bottom. Right on cue, the stair moans and Emma groans before continuing on and coming to stand in front of him. She’s got on naught a thing but one of his old pirate shirts, something she’s taken to sleeping in because the necks allow easy access for breast feeding, and her long thin legs are on full display to his gaze, expanses of creamy skin right before him.

“Killian,” she whispers despite no one else being around, “what are you still doing downstairs?”

He hums before splaying his knees apart and tugging on her (his) shirt before she stumbles forward into the open space, her hands falling against his shoulders and the shirt dipping open in front of him. “Well, I’m playing Santa, and I hear there’s a song out there about mommy kissing Santa Claus.”

Her face scrunches up, and even though he knew it was a joke in bad form, he still had to say it.

“That’s not your best flirting, Mr. Jones.”

“Aye, I know. But I was still kind of hoping you’d kiss me.”

Her legs bend before she settles down onto his lap and her arms wrap around his neck. She’s warm, always so warm except for her damn feet, and he closes his eyes the moment her lips slant over his and his arms begin rubbing up and down her back, tugging her as close as he can get her.

“Merry Christmas, darling,” he whispers when they pull back from each other.

She reaches to the side and pulls his left arm up, placing a kiss against his stump and holding it against her chest while her other hand caresses his stubble. “Merry Christmas, babe. Do you want to come to bed now? The Grinch isn’t going to come and steal our Christmas tree. I think you might be safe.”

He chuckles before leaning into her palm. “I don’t know. Weird things happen here, and I think Hope may lose it if there’s no tree or presents in the morning.”

“She’s not even ten months old. She doesn’t understand the concept of Christmas.”

“But she understands the concept of shiny things and new toys. And we understand the concept of Christmas. Wasn’t it you who said this is more for us than for her?”

“Hmm, I don’t recall.”

“Liar.”

Emma gasps, even if it’s exaggerated, and he rolls his eyes. “How dare you call the mother of your children a thief. And at Christmas time no less. You scoundrel.”

“Dashing rapscallion.”

“Yeah, whatever.” She tugs at his t-shirt collar before leaning down and kissing him again, her lips barely brushing over his. “Let’s go to bed, dashing rapscallion. The real Santa won’t come if we’re down here, and I may have a nice little red surprise waiting for you upstairs.”

He quirks his eyebrow while his body begins to tingle and Emma rises from her perch on his lap.

“Really now?”

“You’ll have to come if you want to find out.”

She begins to walk away and he leans forward to playfully smack her ass, which only makes her sway her hips in a more obvious fashion. Yeah, he loves her a hell of a lot.

“That’s the plan.”

He wakes the next morning to Emma splayed across the entire bed, her head resting over his stomach, and to the sounds od Hope’s babbling through the static of the baby monitor. In the video screen, she’s just sitting up in her crib, but she likely needs to be fed and changed, so he slides out of bed, pulls his pajama pants back up, and wanders down the hall to her nursery. He’s got no clue what time it is, but Henry hasn’t woken to go downstairs to open presents yet, and if it’s anything like last year, he won’t be up anytime soon.

“Hi, little love,” he greets the moment he walks into the room, and Hope’s blue eyes find him almost immediately before she screeches. She’s adorable but holy hell can she make some noises. “Okay, okay,” he soothes, stepping forward and scooping her up so that she’s squirming in his arms, “daddy is just going to change your diaper and get you dressed in the pajamas we bought for mommy, okay? Because it’s Christmas, bug. Yeah, Merry Christmas, Hope.”

Hope doesn’t talk back because, well, of course she doesn’t, but he likes talking to his daughter anyways. One day she’ll be able to speak and she’ll very well talk to him like Henry sometimes talks to him, angry and dismissive and pissed that he said no to staying out until three in the morning. But right now, wishing he’d thought to put his brace on to help hold her down, she babbles as he changes her, and he’s content to listen to her little noises. He quite loves her little sounds, and as much as he loves watching her grow and watching the milestones, he kind of wants it to all just…stop.

He doesn’t want her to grow up. He wants to be able to hold her in his arms forever and listen to her squeals and dress her in pajamas with a tail on her bottom likes she’s a human reindeer.

Ten years ago, if he’d had a thought like that, he would have assumed he was delusional and dying, but it’s not ten years ago. It’s here and now, and while he’ll gladly challenge anyone who dare hurts his family, he’ll also gladly be gushy and sentimental for his family. He wasn’t sentimental, or at least he claimed not to be, for so long, and now his treasure chest isn’t simply a box of things. It’s a home of memories.

Once Hope is changed and dressed, her blonde curls pinned back with a bow, he walks her down to he and Emma’s bedroom, quietly sneaking in and getting back under the covers while Emma slumbers away…until Hope squeals again and gets her chubby hands on Emma’s face.

“Hi, baby,” Emma sighs, her eyes almost instantly transforming from terrified to affectionate. She moves the comforter, the blankets rustling, making sure that it’s still covering her bare chest until her hands are free and she’s sitting up against the headboard. “Did daddy come take care of you while I was sleeping? Yeah? That’s because I put him in a good mood last night.”

“Swan,” he chastises, though no part of him means it.

“She’s a baby, Killian. She doesn’t know what sex is. It’s not like having Henry in the room. We can’t traumatize her like that yet.”

“I know.” He leans over and kisses his wife’s head before pressing a kiss against Hope. “When should we wake Henry up? I know he’s sixteen, but the lad sleeps like a rock.”

Emma hums beside him, still rocking Hope on her lap while their daughter continues to touch all of Emma’s face. “Let me enjoy some cuddles with this little reindeer, nice choice by the way, before we go wake him up. We’ve got to get our stuff done before we head over to mom and dad’s.”

They end up waking Henry around seven, and for someone who has not been a fan of waking up before noon on his break from school, he shoots out of his bed pretty quickly, ambling down the hallway with a determination in his eyes that must be some kind of Christmas thing. He practically bounds down the stairs until Emma stops him, handing over Hope and claiming that she needs pictures of the two of them coming downstairs to see what Santa brought. Henry grumbles a bit before Hope slobbers over his face, and then he smiles down at his sister and talks to her, telling her all about Santa and Christmas while trying to get her to pose for the camera. It’s a disaster, but he’s sure that he and Emma will treasure the pictures and memories regardless.

Henry rips through his presents almost instantly, his face lighting up with excitement over the new laptop they bought him for his writing. Of course, he knows that the lad will likely use it to watch Netflix, but maybe some actual writing and work will be done.

“Thank you, guys,” Henry gushes, getting up and hugging Emma’s neck before he moves to come hug his.

“You’re welcome, my boy,” Killian whispers into Henry’s ear while patting his back. “I think there are some other things under the tree for you, too.”

“I know, but I already know what all of those are.”

“Kid,” Emma chuckles, wrangling Hope in her lap, “what the hell? Did you sneak peeks?”

“No, but you ordered them on Amazon, and it’s hooked up to my email.”

Emma’s mouth gapes open while Henry smirks, and Killian throws his hands up in the air. “See, darling, modern technology is bloody wonderful, but if we’d gone to the store, none of this would have ever happened.”

She huffs in response before looking down at Hope. “Your daddy and your brother are ruining Christmas, and you’re just happy to be playing with the wrapping paper. They should be more like you.”

“She’s a baby, mom.”

“Yeah, well, you’re my baby, too.”

“Mom,” Henry whines, but he smiles anyhow.

The rest of their morning is a blur of red and green wrapping paper being tossed around and thrown away, toys and books and clothes scattered all across the living room. It looks like a tornado has blown through, but for one day, he won’t bother to clean up right away. He’s just going to enjoy this time with his family.

They get Hope several sets of new clothes, none of which she cares about, and several new toys, all of which she cares about for ten minutes before moving on. Meanwhile Henry is sitting in the recliner messing with his computer, mumbling under his breath as it chimes in his lap. Emma opens her gifts, a myriad of clothes and books as well as some Granny’s gift cards. They’re not a thing, but he convinced the Widow Lucas to make them a thing for Emma. But then she opens a small box filled with a diamond necklace, and her eyes light up.

“Killian, we weren’t supposed to do any nice gifts like this.”

“Aye,” he scratches the back of his head and smiles down at her, “I know. I just saw it and thought you’d like it. And that maybe one day you’d go back to wearing necklaces again.’

“Will you,” she begins, scooting over on the couch so that her thighs press against his, “will you put it on? Hope will probably yank it off, but at least for this moment.”

She hands him the silver chain before sweeping her hair over her neck, the thick blonde strands all falling to one side. It takes some maneuvering, but it’s nothing he’s not capable of, and he gets the chain to clasp behind her neck, pressing a soft kiss just below where it rests.

“Beautiful,” he sighs, and Emma smiles. They both know he’s not talking about the necklace.

Though it is a damn beautiful necklace. He has become quite adept at gift giving if he says so himself.

He eventually gets around to opening his own gifts, some sea charts from Henry. He says they’re vintage, which is Henry’s way of saying they’re old, and Killian sometimes wonders if that’s how Henry describes him to his friends…as vintage. Emma’s bought him some new clothes, some of them too bloody bright for his liking, as well as a telescope and new vacuum. Henry practically falls out of his chair laughing at him being excited over a new vacuum, and that’s when he promptly tells Henry that the lad can use it to clean all of this up tonight.

And then maybe he’ll use Henry’s new laptop to “Netflix and chill” with Emma.

Both Emma and Henry gasp, but he chuckles along with Hope. She has no idea what’s going on, but her little baby laugh makes the entire room melt and forget that he just scandalized both mother and son.

Possibly.

Henry may remember that forever.

After all is said and done, it’s a wonderful Christmas morning with just the four of them in their home before they’re all on their way to different houses and celebrations with the complex, wonderful family to which they belong.

“So,” Emma asks, coming to stand next to him and wrapping an arm around his waist while Hope is snuggly perched on her opposite hip, “was operation baby’s first Christmas a success?”

He leans down to kiss her hairline, lingering a tad bit too long and letting the scent of her shampoo and flowery perfume invade his senses. “It was perfect.”

[super-lemon-sama]

I had another super realistic dream-

Just like the dream wife dream, it felt like that was my real life, like I was actually there. 

Sadly this is one of the dreams I don’t remember as well as other but what basically happened was two things. I made friends with this dude and his friends and found out I had a crazy stalker.

the dream will be under the cut and also I made some pictures for it too! ^^

So I was living in this apartment that was basically just one room and a closet ((I mean but I liked it so what'evs i guess. also it was literally just the computer room we had in Oklahoma that I felt was very nice some days and very scary other days.))

there are a couple bits I remember better than others, one that I somehow befriended this guy (who I very specifically thinking in my head in the dream as I was looking at him that His hair was Neapolitan colored and it made me laugh, and so I called him Neapolitan and Neo' from then on.) I don’t remember how we met or what we were talking about before it happened (maybe I was at a party???) but I remember we hadn’t known each other that long but I asked him to walk me home bc I had been getting a creepy feeling all day and he was like "hmmm aight'" 

and I held out my hand and he was like 

"????what???" 

so I dead ass super serious was like 

"You gotta hold my hand, it's a sign of trust in my culture, and is good luck." 

lmaooo I mean in my dream the culture thing was true but I also remember thinking that it would help me tell if he decided to pull out a knife for some reason. ((Like this dude wasn’t even a badie, I was just super suspish of everyone that day))

Anyway we're walking outside in a park or somin and we approach this building. you know how at beaches or public pools they have a building that are like a bathroom for girls and guys but separated by side?

Like this

Well dudes like 

"hey, I need to pee, you okay if we stop for a sec?" 

and I was like 

"hhhhhhhhhdshghjgs yeahiguess." 

obviously only more scared since we left. and he's like 

"look if you're really so worried then just come into the bathroom with me and stand outside the stall, that way I’m right there if something happens and you can look out for trouble for me." 

and so obvi I’m like 

"//gasp// I can’t go in THERE! That’s the boys room!" 

so neos like 

"It's like 12 at night, Literally no one's around to care, you'll be fine. You know unless we aren’t actually alone muahaha" 

and I’m like 

"shuuut your shit up, I’m big scared okay... fine, just hurry up" 

and we walk in

And I’m just realizing now that even though it was the boys room that is literally was just a girls bathroom with just stall and no urinals lmaooo

it looked a lot like this

i remember it very specifically being really dimly lit and the colors were very blue grey, and dark green

i also remember looking down to see if anyone was in one of the stalls but we were in the clear

Anyway as he peed i was getting really nervous and had a daydream thing like I used to get sometimes in Oklahoma where I very vividly imagined something happening. it was of this figure phasing through the wall and running at me really fast

the figure looked like this at first

Its head was covered in this thick tough flesh that made me thing of those rubber masks they make for Halloween, but really thick, once it reached me its face changed into a mans face, but I don’t remember what it looked like, just that he was smiling

I got really scared when I snapped out of it and started hearing a really loud breathing coming from the the stall closest to the exit

as well as this low humming tone that kept getting louder and closer. I saw the latch to the stall start sliding so I screamed to Neapolitan that we need to run right now

and neo busts through the stall I was guarding and grabs my hand and we zoom tf out of that place all the way back to my apartment. like I dead ass was so exhausted that I was actually panting and trying to catch my breath in my dream. like never in my life have I felt like that while in a dream, it was wild.

he was like 

"whoa, that was scare as fuck, what the shit???? Do you like,,,,, want me to stay over tonight and make sure nothing happens?" 

and I'm like 

"KJDFLKADGFALKGFALKDHJ YESPLEASE" 

like sobbing but also dying from running so literally nothing I said was anything close to comprehensible, but he got what I meant.

I only got the pullout couch and offered him to sleep on top while I sleep under it ((it's what I do okay, that's not even my weird ass dream logic thats my real ass what I do irl logic))

 and he was like, 

"nah that's okay you got a pretty comfy chair, i'll just chill in this and keep watch okay?" 

and I like got choked up again bc I was literally so thankful. like even rn even though it was a dream I still feel really thankful???? i just normally never speak to people in my dreams really so it's like more important to me?? Idk

but I remember waking up (in my dream) and seeing him like passed out in the chair arms crossed and it was super funny, but I wake him up and I'm like 

"hey thanks for being so cool man, let me buy you breakfast." 

and he's like 

"Oh man, that sounds great, thanks!"

I vaguely remember that we ate from my apartments like bed and breakfast buffet thing but I don’t remember it that well, but I do remember that some stuff happened after that that had to do with hallways and that going back to my apartment the land lord was standing in front of my door and he was like, 

"hey uhhh, I got some bad news for you..." 

and I'm like 

"uhhhhhhhhh whaaaaat???"

so I remember the landlord sitting in my chair and telling me about how someone broke into my apartment but I wasnt really listening bc there was a storage box on the floor and hanging off of it were a couple of necklaces. ((necklaces I have in real life btw)) but one very specifically that I wore like every day in middle school and the beginning of high school that I had lost not to long after moving into the apartment ((this was true irl and the dream))

the necklace was a thin gold chain with a bunch of miss matched charms on it

I was fixated on it because literally how could it be here right now and why does it look different????

i pick it up and it has a bunch of copper pennies attached to it

it was SCARY vivid, like I was strapped into this dream like it was real life and even my dream self was looking at it like it was crazy real

I remember how the pennies were copper and pretty clean and how they weren’t just added to the ends but mixed into the other charms so whoever did this took the time to take off all the charms and place them back on a certain way with the pennies, I remember the weight of it in my hands when I picked it up and the specific weight at the bottom of the chain from all the pennies and charms

oh man I remember the chinkling sound it made and when i picked it up and I got that panic attack hot cold and nauseous feeling all over. Because I specifically wore that necklace because of the sound it made when I wore it. I liked the clinking sound it made, and who ever took it KNEW THAT

Sometime later im chillin with the dude and his friends, ((it's two other girls)) and I dont remember exactly what we were talking about but this one girl with pokey straight black hair says 

"Oh for sure!" 

confirming that she agreed with some sort of sentiment. she was just a bold person. not loud and obnoxious and not mean. she just had a up front opinion is all, and I thought she was really cool.

oh and we're all chilling on this deck thing but it's like indoors

we got a bunch of books and magazines and stuff

and neo is layin across me, like not in a funky way, but in a chill friend way and everything is chill and he moves closer to my face as he's asking me something and im in the middle of answering him when I get really tense bc I suddenly realize he's really close to my face and that I could totally smooch him if I wanted to. which like I did but I don’t deal with that kinda stuff well so I probably would have just laid there awkwardly not saying anything while I screamed internally until he's like "uhm you okay?" but my alarm woke me up so I'll never know what dream me would have done. Lmaooooo

any stressor like that dead ass makes my head go "brain function .exe has stopped working, please close out and try again later" so maybe that lmaooo

anyway, that was pretty much all I remembered, but just like the dream wife dream it was CRAZY real.

I hope that wasnt to boring to read or to hard to understand! ^^;

[99redballoonsfloatby]

Nightmares

Pairing: Bill/Girlfriend

Warnings: smut, angst, drama, baths, misused commas 

Summary: Playing Pennywise has been taking a toll on Bill. The nightmares have gotten nearly unbearable. 

“I’m fucking these kids up, I know I am.”

I had been watching Bill pace across the short space of his trailer as he waited for a production assistant to come get him for his next scene. His Pennywise makeup was starting to run; surely the makeup department would have to fix it before filming again. With each step he took, the ruffles and frills on his costume would bounce to an unheard rhythm.

It was difficult to take him seriously when he was in full makeup and costume. If I hadn’t heard the sad inflection in his voice, I probably would have laughed when he started talking.

“How could I not be fucking them up?”

He looked over at me, his yellow contacts glowing in the light of the setting sun. Beneath the white clownface, I could see the lines of concern forming.

“It’s acting, it’s their jobs,” I offered the same excuse he always gave me anytime he had to film a sex scene on Hemlock Grove. “They know it’s not real.”

He shook his head, his orange hair jiggling with his disagreement.

“It feels different. It doesn’t feel like it’s fake. It’s deeper.”

He lit a cigarette and opened the door to his trailer. He hated to smoke indoors. I followed him on to the rickety metal steps and stood in front of him as he took a long drag and tried to gather his thoughts. Bill was often concerned about his performance, but he had never once had these concerns. Being a genre actor and dabbling in the horror stories made him a professional when it came to these topics but since this script involved his character scaring children, he took things even more seriously.

He grew up surrounded by kids and he enjoyed playing with them, sometimes even going as far as scaring his younger brother, but they both knew it was just a game.

“I haven’t slept well the past few nights,” he said as he finished his cigarette and stamped it out on the ground.

I nodded. “ I know, baby, I woke up to pee at 2 this morning and you weren’t even in bed. Have you slept at all?”

He shrugged and glanced around the parking lot full of trailers. A few of the kids from the film were playing soccer between their trailers. They were close enough that Bill had to whisper when he started talking again.

“Maybe I should pull out of the movie.”

I looked up suddenly, surprised that he would even offer that conclusion. I tried to hide my surprise but he could read me faster than I could fake an emotion.

“The nightmares have gotten out of control,” he said softly.

I spent the afternoon engulfed in research about horror film actors. Was this a common occurrence for people that so often played villains? Did they carry a part of their diabolical character with them? Was there a way to stop it?

Before Bill got back to our apartment, I gathered everything I could think of that might possibly help him fall asleep. He needed to know that I was taking his feelings seriously, as much as I felt they weren’t warranted.

Our bedroom was covered in scented candles, the smell of lavender radiated through our small apartment. The curtains had been replaced with deep black pieces of fabric that kept as much light out as possible. Quiet music was playing from my phone that was set up in the bathroom next to a relaxing bubble bath. I could already hear his protests about taking a bath but I hoped that if I offered to join him that he wouldn’t whine for too long.

He arrived home shortly after I finished with my project. He looked devastated and I could already tell that something happened.

“I have an evil face,” he said as he dropped his messenger bag and fell onto our bed. “That’s what Jack told me today, my face is perfect for a murderous alien clown.”

I touched his face and his eyes opened slowly. “I love your face,” I said as I placed a kiss to his chin. “And I have wine and a bubble bath ready for you.”

His groan was immediate and it was met with my laughter.

“Stop!” I giggled. “How about I take a bath with you? What about that? Wet, naked girlfriend?” I winked and pulled him to his feet.

His smile crept across his face as he followed me into the bathroom, stripping away his clothes as we walked. I practically pushed him down into the water once he was undressed, not even giving him a moment to offer his disapproval. After handing him a glass of wine, I slid into the tub in front of him and spun around in the hot, soapy water to face him.

“See? This feels good, doesn’t it?”

He sipped his wine slowly and watched me for a moment. “Maybe I am a villain and that’s why I keep booking these nefarious characters.”

I ran my hand up his legs and massaged his thighs gently. He needed to get these thoughts out, not matter how ridiculous they were, and I was just thankful that I was his safe place for these ramblings. As I worked my hands higher, he slowly stopped him lamenting.

“I’m starting to like this bath,” he said as he smirked at me and then pulled me into a gentle kiss.

I moved closer to him, letting my legs wrapped around his hips as we continued to kiss. Our tongues struggled for dominance as he deepened the kiss and I eventually let him take over, hoping that this was what he needed.

He set me up on the side of the corner tub and I spread my legs for him. He was on his knees in a second, pulling me back against him. All the thoughts about his frustration and pain had disappeared from my mind as he ran a finger over my desperate pussy. My entire body craved his touch and Bill, true to his technique, was building that desire in the most agonizing way possible.

His long fingers circled my clit, teasing me. In the years that I had been dating him, I had spent a lot of time teaching him how I liked to be touched. In this moment, I didn’t care how he touched me as long as his hands were on my body.

I could feel the intense heat coiling in my stomach already and if he didn’t start this soon, I was going to finish before he even had a chance to begin. He bit my lip gently as he slid two fingers inside me. I threw my head back, breaking away from his rough kiss and I heard a low chuckle.

“Can’t wait,” I moaned loudly. “Need…more.”

He slid into me slowly, giving me a moment to adjust to his size. He always knew when I needed him to be gentle and when I was ready for more. I must have given him some type of signal because he suddenly started thrusting roughly into me, water started splashing out of the tub but neither of us could stop. This delicious friction was what he needed to clear his mind and I was more than willing to oblige.

An orgasm rolled over me slowly and he followed soon after, thrusting into me erratically and then burying his face in my neck as he finished. He stayed inside me for a moment, trying to catch his breath.

“Fuck,” he finally said after a few more moments. “My knees are going to be so bruised up.”

I laughed loudly as he stood up. “Now you know how I always feel!”

We left the bathroom a wet mess; I assured him I would worry about cleaning it up later. I wanted to stay focused on getting him to sleep. After a martini and a few episodes of some British show that he loved on Netflix, he had drifted off to sleep with his head on my pillow and his long gorgeous body stretched out in the middle of our bed. I blew out the candles and let myself drift off to sleep with his body curled around mine.

Bill started to move some time later, his soft whimpers waking me up immediately. It was happening again and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I sat up and turned the lamp on in the same moment that Bill sat straight up and screamed. He was frantic, his hand searched the bed for something, any type of safety and as soon as his eyes opened, his hands fisted the sheets so hard that it ripped off all corners of the mattress. His breath was uncertain, coming in short, quick bursts. His skin was covered in a thin layer of sweat, his hair damp around his neck.

“Look at me,” I said softly as I cupped his cheeks with my hands and turned his face towards mine. “I’m here, you’re here.”

His pale skin was damp and his eyes took a few seconds to focus on mine. When they finally did, he gasped and fell against me, clutching my neck as he took a deep breath.

“It’s me, I’m the monster!” he choked out as his breath hitched in the back of his throat.

I don’t know what made me say it but suddenly I was pulling back from him and demanding, “if you’re the monster, then fucking scare me!”

His eyes went wide, his face covered in confusion.

“Scare me,” I said again, louder.

“Scare you? How?” he said with a look of bewilderment on his face.

“I’m asking you to scare me, B. Show me how scary you can be, give me the best you got. I’m your safe place…” I said with a sigh.

“I-I-I…I can’t do it. I can’t scare you,” he stammered.

“Why not? Monsters scare people, don’t they? So scare me! It will be easy because I’m literally afraid of everything.”

I could see the flicker of an idea flash across his face but instead he laid down and put his head in my lap. He looked up at me and smiled slightly. I looked down at him and he flashed me that villainous Pennywise smile and without realizing what was happening, I started laughing.

“Hey! That was supposed to be scary!” he laughed back at me. “It’s not scary! It’s adorable and you’re adorable,” I smiled as I held his face. “You’re so close to being done filming.”

He nodded and I ran my fingers through his hair.

“It’s a dark time, I feel like I’m in a dark place.”

“You probably are, B, but that’s only because you’re so dedicated to what you do. Playing Pennywise is almost like being in a relationship with him. In a few days, you’ll be able to break up and detox. The nightmares will end.”

I ran my hands up and down his chest and he nodded in agreement. His eyes slipped shut and I was hoping he was asleep until I saw a small smirk appear on his face.

“I need a cigarette,” he whispered. “And maybe a blowjob.”

I laughed and pushed his head off my lap. He sat up and grabbed his cigarettes and we went out to the small balcony off our bedroom.

I watched him light the cigarette and take a few drags.

“I could probably handle the blowjob,” I laughed. “What can I say? That Pennywise smile just puts me in the mood.”

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

so at current we have three doggos, one is a foster who has (through a lot of care and affection and training) reached a point where she is ALMOST ready for adoption to a furever home...

but there’s an emergency foster coming to us tomorrow, the poor little old doggo was horribly mistreated and the heartless cunts that had her left her to starve for 3 weeks in the hopes she’d die or run off... i don’t know how you can curse someone without knowing their names or faces, but i’ll find a way

she’s obscenely thin from the photos, but we’ll give her anything the vet decides (our doggos usually eat optimum dog food, appropriate to age, or age-appropriate and supplemented with puppy stuff, if they’re rake-thin and need to gain weight) but if there’s something else that will help, we’ll make it happen

there are so many foster families desperately trying to look after as many as they can, and some of the dogs and cats they rescue have such horrific backgrounds you just want to find the people who hurt them and peel their flesh off as they scream for mercy, have them look into eyes that say ‘you don’t deserve that, do you?’

they have been beaten, neglected, starved, whipped, burned, left to die of injuries or illnesses because ‘we can just get a new (animal) for cheap’, they are little old doggos and kitties who have known only one family their entire lives but apparently their age is now inconvenient and they’re turned in for a newer model (literally, people bring their old dog in to the pound, adopt a puppy and walk out, they can go straight to hell), abandoned at the side of the road, left to die somewhere bc they’re just a Thing and not part of the Family, the ones who were presents... up until people realised there’s EFFORT in raising an animal... bc puppies/kittens are BABIES and need to be taught how to live and feel safe...  etc.

and the thing is... even the most damaged dogs and cats, the ones who can’t sit still, the ones who snap and growl and quiver in fear, even the ones who tear things apart, the ones who can’t stand the sight of men or raised voices or sudden movements or physical contact... 

they all have the capacity for love

maybe it’s not the way you would anticipate, but it is there. 

for example, an extremely anxious/damaged little fluffball of a doggo being cared for by an experienced carer... after six months of being unable to trust contact (spending the first few weeks hiding under the couch shaking with fear) actually came up to her human dad, as he was laying on the floor with her, and licked his head. She ran at the attempt of further contact (raised hand), but it really said, in her own way, that she felt safe there. She has sat on a lap and licked again, since, apparently; and her carer(s) are over the moon about it, because they never though it would happen

our foster fail (pupper we ended up adopting bc we couldn’t let her go) was so thin, and so scared when we got her; sometimes she still gets frightened, but she comes to get one of us if that happens. She knows she’s safe, and loved.

our current foster pupper, willow, was neglected and abused and terrified of everything. its a long story, but she was given to us as a complex case that needed care, and she’s come so far in a few months. from hitting the floor and submitting at every noise or movement, to only occasionally if very freaked (thunder, random fireworks going off with no warning -fucking carols by candlelight), she doesn’t destroy as much (attention seeking and anxiety behaviours), she doesn’t fight with her doggo siblings but instead plays, she can follow basic commands, she has lost a lot of the excess she came with (through proper mealtimes and games, occasional treats), little fucker is ridiculously smart too so she’s a challenge...

for example, now she’s less rotund than before... the little bugger realised she can slip through the dog fence. it’s like an octopus, she pops her head through, a leg, and zoop, out. she never goes anywhere, just sort of sits out there being smug, until we find her, the sneaky devil. or climbs on chairs to look out of things, or jumps on the bench when the humans aren’t looking to sneak things. etc.

very clever, and she’s confident enough to show that, now.

i had a point, but i think i forgot, but basically... do not get a pet for a gift, don’t get one if it doesn’t fit in with your lifestyle (this whole ‘on a chain out the back their whole life’ thing is BULLSHIT), you hesitate at the thought of dealing with an old dog, you are getting it to ‘teach the kids about death’ (heard that more than once), you only think its a thing you should have but don’t really want, you only want an animal that fits specific expectations (eg won’t bark, or wee on the rug, or chew your shoes, etc.) bc they all do that, at some point... etc.

people are cruel, and while there is no way to shove all of the offenders in a blender to atone for their sins (pear wiggler machine broke), the animals they hurt can be helped. 

Do not get an animal unless you know what you’re doing, understand the effort and expense (worming, flea baths -do not use collars they can kill, food/meals, water containers and bowls, toys, beds, specialist shaving/fur trimming, accidental vet trips and annual check-ups and vaccinations, incidental issues, kitty litter, pooper scoopers, leads/leashes/harnesses, etc.), treats, training pads, understand that puppies/kittens will need training bc they are BABIES who need to be taught just like toddlers do (they will mess up but that’s normal, we all shat in nappies at one stage of our lives and no one holds that against us), that dogs/cats age and require different things, that they need stimulation and play, safety and shelter, love and affection, patience and understanding, boundaries and rules, etc. Just like kids. 

Understand this animal joins your family, it becomes a part of it. It is a commitment, and you need to understand that the second they join your family it is your responsibility to care for them. From puppy or kitten to little elderly doggo or kitty who can’t hear all that great and sometimes pees on the rug bc of mild incontinence. It happens, it might be a little annoying or stressful,m but you deal with the situation. You are the only people they have known, the only family they have been part of and loved, they love you their entire lives (sometimes they are hyper-affectionate, other times animals show it by simply feeling safe enough to fall asleep near you, they’re individuals), so the most important thing is not abandoning them for something younger, newer, cuter. 

Do not get an animal, unless you understand that this little life is dependant on you. You feed/wash/clean up after/play with/care for/love them all their lives, keep them healthy and safe... and it will not always be easy, but it is always worth it. If you make that commitment, you can’t just cast them aside when they’re no longer fun, when they’re no longer young and chipper, when they become ‘a hassle’. They’ve dealt with your shit this whole time, too, and you haven’t been kicked to the curb... 

-

TL; DR - Do not get an animal unless you are prepared, informed (or willing to learn about how to care for them), and committed to caring for them their entire life. They are your family, and they will love you if you treat them properly.

There are too many damaged foster animals who have had physical, emotional and psychological abuse in their lives; who just need love, understanding, boundaries and kindness. Where ‘no’ means ‘stop that’ and not ‘I’m gonna hurt you for not doing what i wanted!’. Don’t contribute to their suffering, be sure you are in a good place in order to have an animal and be able to meet their needs.

Don’t ever get an animal as a gift unless there has been significant discussion about the situation beforehand; and please, stop leaving kids with animals, some kids are just the worst because they may not comprehend that a puppy/kitten (also a baby) is not a toy, and that’s why they do awful things. 

[falling-pages]

Tough Kids: Short Story

This story is about two characters, pseudo-siblings, who run a con to get to California. They finally have a heart-to-heart about their past, futures, and the impact they have had on each other while also getting on each others’ nerves.

Below is the link to read it in another tab, in case you don’t like reading it in a text box. Read, reblog, share, like, and comment!

*My story and characters. All rights reserved*

“That’s no way for you to live. I have to think about you, about your future. You’re my family now, too.” “Don’t worry about me. I’m with you, for whatever happens.”

https://writer.zohopublic.com/writer/published/f0tjsc4cf6bad9dd7441e8b35a5b1d1542f40

Moonlight washes over his hair, shrouding him in an angelic light so ironic God would chuckle. He didn’t hear me coming, or if he did, he gave no indication. But as I walked closer to him, the moonlight blanket began to fade until it was just a thin mist around his gaunt frame. I kicked a pebble and he slightly turned his head; the shadows did nothing to hide the worry lines on his forehead and the bags under his eyes. Suddenly, the light wasn’t so angelic. It was ghostly and cold.             He doesn’t deserve ghostly and cold. He deserves warm firelight and a mother’s kiss while he sleeps. And a meal, for God’s sake. He looks like he hasn’t eaten in days.             “Aren’t you cold out here?” I ask, touching his pointed shoulder.             He flinches under my touch, but he plays it off as a shrug. “Not really.”             “Come back inside, Mark,” I say. “The fire is going, and I’ll make you some tea if you can’t fall asleep.”             “I’m just scared they’re gonna find out,” he says, eager to change the subject. He reaches up to scratch his eyebrow, his hand practically glowing white. “Cons like this never last. Someone is going to figure us out, and then what?”             “That’s a problem for another day, kid.” I lean my forearms on the ledge of the porch balcony. “Don’t worry about that.”             Mark mirrors my posture, looking out over the parking lot of the motel. “I can’t lose this, Pipes. You’re like a sister to me.”             “Well, that is the gimmick we’re using.” I reach over and ruffle his hair. “Even though we look nothing alike.”                    “Yeah, yeah, I got mom’s eyes and dad’s nose and you got dad’s hair and mom’s face or whatever.” He recites our fake genetic history without any hesitation, rolling his eyes. “I don’t see how people fall for it.”             “Don’t question it,” I say. “The more convincing we are, the more money we make. Besides, we can always say we’re half-siblings or that you’re adopted.”             “Hey! Why am I the adopted one?”             “Because I'm the one who literally found you in a dumpster."             He swats at me and frowns. His face is rough and hard, his cheekbones so sharp. I need to be a better sister, better provider—             A gust of wind blows through, and Mark shakes. I take off my scarf and offer it to him. “Sure you’re not cold?”             He hesitates, then shakes his head. “I’ve had worse before you met me. Nothing beats New Years in the Bronx, I swear. Cardboard boxes don’t do jack.”             I roll my eyes and loop the scarf around his neck anyways. “But you’re not on the streets anymore,” I plead. “You’re in Richmond, in a motel with a lit fireplace and a bed and blankets. Please come inside.”             He stands his ground, and I lose my patience. I reach and grab him by the ear and march back to our room. Despite his protests, I’m determined.            After unlocking the door, we go inside, and I shove him onto his bed. “What was that for?” he yells, rubbing his ear.             I draw the curtains and warm up the tea kettle. After I complained a couple of times to the concierge about having coffee but no tea, they sent some tea bags free of charge. Sometimes it pays to be pushy. Now we’ll have supplies while we’re on the road.             “You are not caching a cold on my watch,”I say, rummaging through the bags.                “Why not?” On cue, he sneezes. “It would help sell the act.”               I pause. That is true, but there are too many variables. “You would sneeze on a potential Good Samaritan and scare him off.” I rummage through the tea choices, frowning at the lack of actually good options. “How do you feel about chamomile?”             “Whatever.” Mark winces as he unwraps my scarf. In an instant, I’m at his side unpacking the first aid kit. His movement cracks his chapped knuckles, the slight bit of blood still unsightly. He catches my gaze and snickers. “This is your fault, you know. You wouldn’t let me use your lotion.”             “Hey.” I dab at the wound with a cotton ball. “If you wanna smell like peony and lavender, be my guest.” He wrinkles his nose, and I smirk. “Want me to get you some manly lotion next time we hit the store?”             “Please. Get some scents like football or war or denial.”             Smiling, I hold up the bloody cotton ball and dab some ointment on his skin. “Can you wrap them, or do you need me to?”                          He rolls his eyes hard enough to see stars. “Scratch what I said. You’re not a sister to me, you’re definitely like a mom.”             “You bet I am, kid. Now, is that a yes or a no?”             “No!” He snatches the bandages from me. “I’m sixteen, Piper. I can put a Band-Aid on my hand.”             I raise my hands in surrender. “Okay, kid, just making sure.”             He peels the bandage. “I’m not a kid.”             “You act like it sometimes.”             “Hey!” This time he laughs, and my heart warms up. Any time he laughs is rare. I want to treasure it. Hopefully I can get him to laugh a little more and smile a little brighter. “You can’t call me a kid, you’re just nineteen!”             “Which makes me a legal adult, which means I can adopt you.” I smack my lips as I put on lip balm. “So unless you want to be calling me mom for the rest of your life, I suggest you start respecting your elders, son.”             Mark opens his mouth, shuts it, and opens it again. “You’re so annoying.”             The kettle whistles, and I grab two mugs to pour the tea. “You know I’m doing this for the best, right? You’re my family now, too.”             With a brief smile, he joins me on the couch. “I know.”             We sip in silence for a little bit, enjoying the heat and each other’s company. When we first met seven months ago, I had no idea that the soaked, shivering orphan hiding in a Philadelphia dumpster would end up meaning the world to me. He has helped me deal with my issues, and I’ve hoped I’ve helped him with his. Back then, he could barely stand and shrunk from every outstretched hand. Now, he’s tapping my foot with his own, one of his concentrating quirks. It took him awhile to allow me to touch him, but I don’t blame him a bit after what he went through. Progress is progress. Every time he lets me hug him, however briefly, my spirits soar.             My eyes drift over his figure, swallowed up by the sweatshirt. He’s so thin, so underdeveloped. We might be the same height, but he’s so scrawny I’m afraid the wind is going to pick him up and carry him away.             I set my jaw. I will not let that happen. I’m going to protect him.             “What are you thinking about, Pipes?”             “Hmm?”I look up over the rim of my mug and see Mark staring at me, eyebrows raised. His large brown eyes shine like a thousand stars in the firelight. Those eyes have seen too much at such a young age. He’s too young. He should be playing Fortnite and dating and studying for school, not aching from beatings and running from the law.             “I said, what are you thinking about?”             I set my mug down and draw my knees up to my chest. “Wondering why they put fireplaces in rooms that cost thirty bucks a night,” I laugh. “I mean, this whole joint could go ‘poof’ in a second if there were any of the unscrupulous types here.”             Mark squints at me. “Piper. We literally just stole a laptop and five hundred dollars.” He traces the outline of his mug. “Plus, we con people out of money by saying we’re siblings trying to get to California to escape from our abusive dad. We have fake I.D.s! We are the unscrupulous type!”             Okay, he’s got me there. “Well, part of that is true. We are going to California, and you are escaping your abusive dad.”             After a beat, he slurps his tea and asks me, “What happens when we get to California? What do we do there?”             A lot of ideas go through my head, but I dismiss them. “There are a couple of programs for at-risk youth for you, and some job trainings for me, but I don’t know,” I admit. “I just thought I would be hopping trains and pickpocketing for the rest of my life. Then I met you.” I nudge him with my foot. “And that’s no way for you to live. I can’t think about myself anymore, you’re here, and I have to think about your future and what’s best for you.”             “Pssh.” He blows air out of his mouth. “I already dropped out of school before I met you. Now I have a criminal record. We can worry about the future when it comes. For right now, let’s focus on scamming people and getting food.”             “And not dying in this sketchy motel.”             He smiles and puts his hand on top of mine. “Don’t worry about my future. I’m with you for whatever happens.”             It’s so touching that I almost cry. The silence is thick. His eyes are bright. My heart is full.             Then he sneezes and ruins the Hallmark moment.             “See!”I shout, pointing my finger. “You’re gonna get a cold! I told you!”             Mark slowly opens his eyes, looking high as hell. “I feel like I lost part of my soul in that sneeze,” he whispers.             I laugh. “Finish your tea, and then let’s get you to bed, tiger.”             “But this is disgusting!” he says, eyes clear. “I can’t finish this!”             “Take it like a shot,” I shrug. I get up, wiping my hands on my pants. “I gotta pee. Be finished when I get out.”             “But it’s hot!” he whines.             “Liquor burns worse. Drink up.”             When I get out of the bathroom, he is leaning against the kitchen sink, arms crossed and pouting. I swear sometimes it feels like I’m raising a four-year-old instead of a teenager.             “That was horrible,” he spits out, his face all screwed up.             “It’s for your own good. You’re welcome!”             “Stop being so peppy at my misery!”             “Sorry, kid.” I walk to him and ruffle his hair. “It’s better than you getting a cold. We can’t afford any accidents; people here are stingier than I thought.”             He wipes his nose. Just as I was about to comment on the price of laundry, too, he pulls me into a hug and nestles his face into my neck, squeezing my shoulders. I return it immediately. He rarely returns affection, much less initiates it, so something must be eating him. I pull back and gently touch the back of his head. “What’s wrong?”             A few tears fall down his cheeks, and he swats them away. “Nothing’s wrong, it’s just…everything is okay. For once.”             I tilt my head. “What?”             He clears his throat. “Look, you know I had a pretty shitty childhood. After Mom left Dad, everything just fell apart. I mean, I guess it did. I don’t remember her at all. But then he would just tell me all the time that I was worthless, I was a burden, he wished I had never been born, stuff like that.” I steady him against the counter as he starts to shake. “Then when I got older, he…” When he stops, my mind flashes to the scars on his back at the beach. “But right before I ran away, he told me that no one would ever love me.”             In that moment, my heart splits into a thousand pieces. He spills out everything he had kept locked inside for those seven months, finally ready to release.             “Oh, Mark.” I pull him to me, lightly massaging his shoulders. “I’m so sorry.”             His voice is thick and strained. “And I believed him,” he whispers, flexing his fingers into fists on my back. “I mean, I was one of thousands of runaway kids in New York. I did what I could to survive, but I honestly didn’t care if I died or not.” My hold on him tightens. I gently run a hand through his hair, not wanting to trigger his aversion. “But just when I really thought I would always be on my own, you found me, Piper.” He pulls back and looks at me in the face, his eyes red. “You took a chance on me and you took care of me. You gave me attention and food and love and a family. You showed me that I am worthy of love.” His trance breaks, and he snaps out of the mood. “Oh God, I’m crying. Why the hell am I crying?”             I choke out a laugh, now that I’m in tears too. “Let it out.”             Batting at his tears with the heels of his palms, he steals a glance at me. “I made you cry? Oh God, I made you cry. I’m sorry.”             “Hey!” I grab his hands away from his face. “It’s okay. Finish the story.”             “You’ve shown me that you care for me,” he continues. “I don’t know why, because I’m an asshole sometimes, but you still care about me.”             I take the moment to loop my arm around his neck, leading him to the bed. He only gets very emotional when he’s very tired, and in the state he’s in, he’ll pass out any minute. “Yeah, well, that’s true,” I say. “But you’re my asshole, and I’m not going to let something bad happen to you.”             We reach the bed. I look up and see his eyes nearly shut, and he starts to sway. “Come on, tiger, get some rest.” I pull back the sheets and help him in. Poor kid collapses immediately. I don’t blame him. We’ve had a rough few days.             As I walk away, I feel his hand latch on to mine. I turn and he smiles contentedly, so adorable and happy. I want him to stay that way. That’s my job.             “Piper?”             “Mhmm?”             His smile expands, and he looks like a little cherub. “Even though you’re not my mom, thanks for taking care of me. You’re a lot better than my old man.”             I lean down and brush his hair out of his face. “I care about you. You’re never a burden to me.”             “Goodnight…Pi…”             I gaze down at him as he drifts off. “Goodnight, tiger.”             Once I’m sure he’s asleep, I wash the mugs, put out the fire, and pull the envelope out of my pocket. We only made fifty bucks today, barely enough to cover the rent for the room and laundry tonight. We need to make more to get food, and then we’ll probably skip town. Southerners aren’t as hospitable as I thought.             While I think, I watch Mark’s shallow breathing. He is definitely going to get sick at the worst possible time. We can hardly afford medicine, much less a clinic visit. If he gets sick, there’s no way I’m letting him on the job with me. Even though the sibling act rakes in more cash, he needs to rest.             Oh, well. We’ll figure it out. We’ve weathered worse.             I put the money back and climb onto the couch, shivering as I try to relax. The fireplace would be really nice, but I’m not going to risk it burning out when I’m sleeping three feet away.             The cushions are lumpy, but I manage to doze off, only hearing the quiet pant of Mark’s snores. I guess I shouldn’t worry about him. Nothing’s worse than New Years in the Bronx, apparently. Besides, he’s a tough kid. I am too. And maybe, as long as we stay together, these two tough kids can turn out alright.

[cafenzie]

oh look, me again regarding things in fanfic that bug me --

/ This will be concerning menstruation and menstrual cycles/periods as it relates in general and it’s misconceptions found in descriptions of writing.

So.......sometimes I feel like the people who write fanfiction and scenes or areas regarding periods...don’t have periods??? Given that I know the number of female to male writers can be equal, I also know a ton more girls that happen to write and so it’s really confusing how misleading some may periods sound in fanfic when....they would, theoretically, have experience of periods themselves. 

And it’s not the weird un-experienced “sex scene - esque” thing that I see a lot of in fanfiction either, because it’s a natural and obvious thing, my friend. Periods are a thing and so if you don’t like the talk about it you can turn back now but honestly this shouldn’t be “disgusting” in any way what I’m about to unleash on you because it’s just natural so get over it, really. ( unless you have a fear of blood, that’s different ).

What I’m talking about is writers who dramatize or don’t realistically portray periods and menstrual cycles. Whether it’s the “bright red blood” or, you know, like blood everywhere ( like....on the wall kind of everywhere because then it sound like more like a homicide case instead ) or just the general points people can miss so I’ll just start in no particular order of how to properly go about writing about periods and people on their periods :

01. Please, for the love of the stars, don’t always go describe the blood as bright red. I see this so many times that I wonder if some of these people really don’t have periods or understand how they work ?? Let’s make this easy: menstrual blood comes in all variety of colors from that light crimson ( especially during a lighter cycle ) all the way to a dark brown that, yeah, sounds like it’s from the wrong place, but it’s not.  Actually, the darker your blood is, the more likely it’s “leftover” as I call it, meaning it’s the blood left over from last month’s lining and never got disposed of out of your lady bits and because it’s been so long, the color darkens and only gets disposed of when your new cycle starts. Usually, I start with darker blood because of that exact reason -- it’s one of the first things to come out along with all that fresh blood that, yes, may look a little brighter.  But the rest of the point is: not everyone has bright red blood on their menstrual cycle. Actually, I don’t think I’ve ever talked to anyone who did, besides in small, sparse amounts..! 

02. Do NOT cover up shitty actions with PMS reasoning. Do not validate someone shitting all over a person just because “they are on their period”. I hear this one so often, of how women are portrayed as literal devils while on their periods because of “PMS”. Yeah, okay, I get pretty annoyed more so when I’m on my period, but that’s due to three main reasons: (1) Hormones are the secret behind “PMS” as everyone dubs it. Estrogen and Progesterone levels in your body may heighten or serious decrease, causing imbalance, which affects your Serotonin, which is a neurotransmitter responsible for your mood balance, pain perception, and the sleep-wake cycle your body is used to. (2) I put in a trusty tampon but came back realizing my cycle is too heavy and I bled through. Maybe I was out and about. Maybe I was wearing nice underwear. Maybe I put the tampon in wrong or I should have brought a pad to put with it. Whatever the case is, every woman deals with her period a different way, personality-wise included. The myth about grumpy women who get super cheery is just waay too cliche for one thing, and it’s just ea fact that some women perceive their periods in different ways: I know girls that perk up during their cycle and we hang out and laugh and shit. I know women that may bite you if you try and grab her pizza slice, but who wouldn’t normally?? Fact is that variety is a thing with so called “PMS” and while it’s a handy term, it’s also become very desensitized to just mean that cliche stereotype of a she-devil or dragon lady who’s simultaneously bleeding out.

I’ll add on another common stereotypical misconception ( or, a least, how it’s treated to seem like ) with eating habits of a girl fighting through her cycle. Yeah, we get hungry. We eat, probably a lot more than normal, and yeah we probably eat a lot more greasy or starchy food than normal. And yeah...we fucking eat chocolate man, because it’s delicious and we deserve it. However, we do this for a reason and -- like everything else there -- it varies between each person. When we are on our periods, we are continuously losing blood ( on average 40 milliliters a day for approximately 5 days give or take ). Generally, we try and make up for everything lost during that time by drinking lots of water, but also eating more -- also as a side-effect of our Serotonin as well as the initial phase before bleeding in which our body is thinning we may have a child ( in which case it makes us think we should be eating for two ). So yeah, food is good. On another note, caffeine can actually heighten your irritability and pain during a menstrual cycle and it’s usually advised to avoid it for that time, unless you’re like me and can’t live without that first sip of morning coffee so just be wary.

03. Believe or not, those who don’t have periods, it smells. Vaginas have an odor and let me tell you that odor just come to life with that discharge. Again, everyone differs, but smells that can come from below deck are caused by bacteria mostly and the fact that you’ve been retaining moisture down there all this time by wearing underwear ( on a side note, it’s actually very good to go without the knickers every so often, even just to bed! Air that sucker out, she needs it ). Take into mind you’re losing blood and mucus and tissue that’s literally shedding from your uterus. Vaginas also can smell on a regular basis because that’s how the cookie crumbles, folks. Same thing, minus the blood and gore.  It’s only different or “bad” if it’s because of an infection like yeast or your pH levels are off ( like using douches / body washes up in there. Trust me -- DON’T ). Otherwise, it’s normal!

04. Cramping and pain is normal, yes, but please remember the other sides of your cycle from fevers, headaches ( the worst ), migraines, heartburn, aching muscles, dizziness, vomiting / nausea, and the list goes on ! Period pain is not just defined by those cramps that we feel all the way from right above our uterus all the up into our belly because there is so much more. Not only that, but people experience cramping differently -- some don’t even notice it at all!  Take into mind that lots of people ( like me ) commonly take medications like Midol or Pamprin to suppress or relieve these symptoms along with others. Some take it religiously as soon as they see the blood coming, but there’s also light-takers who only take a dosage when the feel it.  Me, personally -- I’ll use a hot pad if it feels really bad and drink lots of cranberry juice to make sure I’m still peeing well and I may find that laying in that strange position that took me 30 minutes to find is also helpful. Point is, you can surely relieve that pain with medication and most smart girls do if they know they need it, so it really just doesn't make much sense to constantly write about your girl writhing on the floor in pain every month now does it?

05. Okay, now we’re really gonna get personal so fair warning of possible/slight NSFW below. ....For my girls out there who get really heated during their period, I feel you. Honestly, I think this is one of my personal main indicators of my oncoming cycle since I’ll notice that “ hey, I’ve been fantasizing about Bucky Barnes way more than I normally do ”. Yeah, given I love Bucky Barnes, I think of myself somewhat humble for not thinking about what else that metal arm could be put to good use for every single night, okay?  I guess this segment will also just be informative for those of you unfamiliar with sex during your period or masturbation during a cycle, so be prepared if you’re wondering. For this, my main concern with fanfic writers is that they write how blood get everywhere, and I mean like on the ceiling kind of everywhere or like soaks through to the mattress and I’ll sit here so confused. So let Abby here inform you all about the basic 101 of the menstrual nsfw news. 

First thing’s first is that it really does not get everywhere. I’ll be brutally honest in saying that when I do the deed, the aftermath and cleanup is not as bad as you think. Maybe just a quick rinse off or brush off, quick dab of a cool cloth with water on it -- you’re good. ( obviously do take care of your toys though, please: I just mean this in general ). And if you really are worried about the mess you might make, like I was the very first time, lay out a towel !! ( other option is the shower, just don’t slip friends ).  Second thing: will it hurt? In my experience, it shouldn’t?? I hope it doesn’t and if you do feel pain, just stop. For me, personally, it tends to relieve a lot of my pain while, ultimately, satisfying my crave so I’m happy.  Lastly, the oral implied in a lot of fanfic can be...excessive? And while this isn’t bad, it can also leave about a big chunk of the previous information and description  from the color, smell, texture, even taste! ( for some reason there’s the popular cliche of the person raising their head after giving them head and they just see like the blood dripping down their chin and I’m like ??? not very realistic guys tbh ). Since we’ve covered the first two already we’ll jump into texture and taste: remember that the discharge during a cycle isn’t just blood. It’s a mixture of loose blood, bits of tissue from the lining that was shed, and your cervical mucus ( which mostly determines the texture as a whole ). Cervical mucus can change and differ but is mostly known for these main descriptions: tacky/sticky, creamy, milky, watery, etc. It’s mostly a matter of how dense it is whether it’s like a thick cream, a lotion, or water. Take into mind how the person giving oral will perceive this along with taste! Those little balls of flesh from your uterus lining the wall? Yeah, they’ll get some of that, and it will look black and that may be freaky but it’s honest. Despite the common mistake that period discharge tastes like the blood that comes from your arm or mouth, it does not. It will not have a super metallic-y taste and, overall, may not be pleasant ( also given how old it could be ). That doesn’t mean it can’t be good, to a degree, but don’t expect Dracula to be lusting after you. 

I think that’s all I can currently think of, please add on if you can any more side-notes or comments, questions, etc. For you fanfic writers, please TAKE NOTE OF THIS. And to my girls out there, you keep rocking it, gorgeous.