#sometimes Facebook has some winners

[woundedheartwithin]

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Chortle headlines.

Some of these are interesting. I don't know if it bodes well if Paddy Young is the absolute best rookie comedians in all of Britain, but he definitely had a good show last year (that got streamed on NextUp from Edinburgh). I have trouble believing anyone wrote a show that's better than both Paul Foot's Dissolve and Ahir Shah's Ends, but to be fair, I haven't seen John Kearns' show and he is very fucking good at these things, makes me hope even more that he'll be doing something in Edinburgh while I'm there. Alex Horne got an award for Taskmaster being an outstanding achievement, not quite sure what that means but I think it's accurate. I think if you look up the definition of "breakthrough act" you'll just find a note that says "see Sam Campbell's career throughout 2023", so that couldn't really have gone any other way. I've heard Kiri Pritchard-McLean compere a bunch on NextUp things, she is in fact very good at clubs. I haven't seen any of the other nominees but I'm still sure that James Acaster deserved to win that best tour one. I couldn't stomach the amount of Celebrity Glamour in Joe Lycett's new show but he is a great comedian and he is definitely made to be a TV comedian, which in some ways could be an insult but I really mean it as a compliment, he's great at that, good for him. Munya Chawawa posts highly amusing song parodies on YouTube. Fern Brady's is one of the best comedian books I've read. Three Bean Salad I was unable to get into, but maybe I'll give it another shot sometimes, after I finish with the winners of that radio award, John and Elis - well done to them for getting over ten years and not completely falling apart. I usually find it hard to get into sketch comedy (or anything that isn't straight stand-up) but Lorna Rose Treen made me laugh with character things last summer, so she probably deserves that one.

Those are my unsolicited opinions on that. The existence of Taskmaster is definitely an outstanding achievement for all involved.

This a special feature that happens every once in a while, called "Chortle publishes the contents of Daniel Kitson's mailing list". I find it gets funnier the less it sounds like Steve Bennett knows about the news items beyond the contents of the mailing list email, and in this case, that is clearly fuck all. But anyway, it's a great show and exciting announcement, anyone who has the opportunity should go see this tour. He said in the email that he might try to get something going in NYC later this year, which would be incredibly logistically difficult for me to get to (8.5-hour drive each way if I can borrow a car from someone, which would be tough, 14 hours on the bus otherwise, I've been told I can't take any more vacation days in 2024 because I used them on the London/Edinburgh trip), but still, I have found myself wondering how I might be able to make that work if he actually announces it.

Fucking hell. I can't believe this. My local comedian Facebook group is going pretty wild in response to this news. That's fucking huge, a massive amount of stuff is centred around this. To be honest I'm still not clear on the scope of this news so I won't go into it too much, I'll just say, fucking hell. Truly shocking. That's like a sport just canceling its national championships halfway through the season.

Excellent. Everyone should read this. His 2023 show (which I think he's still touring) is one of my favourite comedy shows ever. And the one before that, which inspired this book, is also very fucking funny, though not as good as his latest one.

Also, I am up for a trend of one comedian per year writing a book about their relatively recent autism diagnosis. Who do we think it'll be in 2025? I have approximately four to five suggestions.

[redjaybathood]

I really want a Jason Tood as Red Hood movie, but like, nearly classic Red Hood. Expressionless helmet, tiny white eyes, form fitting leather jacket, no bat on his chest and barely using guns.

Specifically I want him taking apart some CADMUS operation or other government thing making child soldiers. It'd be more in the vain of John Wick the first, than the usual action beat-em ups.

Though I do imagine him fighting Bane maybe solely for this exchange.

Bane: You stand against the man who broke the bat, what can one of his errand boys do? Jason: Yeah I beat him up too. Unlike yourself though I did not need to break out all of Arkham to wear him down first. But hey, we can't all be winners.

Also him hacking and erasing all the info and specifically choosing to kill the head scientist as he's the only one who has all the info memorized (its a back sight there are no back ups) and crush their head solely cos its pragmatic, showing his kills are strategic.

Yeah, okay, I'm a man of simple pleasures, like Jason moving through the crowd of enemies with whatever he has on hand. And taking down enemies bigger than him, with brains to rival the muscle.

But also, consider this, just a few suggestions to make a mess out of Jason's usual MO.

1) who guards the lab with child soldiers? Child soldiers. Now, suddenly he cannot mow the guards down

2) I humbly propose the following children: Cloud 9, Babe in Arms, DNA, Doomed, and Devour - as the child soldiers in question

3) Killing the head scientist will solve the problem with this particular lab, but not overall with the principle of the thing that someone, somewhere, signed off on it; put together a budget; provided supplies; etc etc. And killing those people, most of them paper-pushers, not all of them fully aware of what's going on, just being good soldiers, just doing what they're told and not asking questions... It won't solve the issue.

4) And, you know, sometimes dumping the whole thing on Internet and making public outrage do its thing is helpful, especially in a re-election year, but a Congressal hearing is a must, too. This one is going to be the biggest since MKUltra, bigger than Facebook even. Hopefully, more successful.

5) Jason doesn't trust the system but that's the thing, the system needs to be checked, and the system needs to be changed if found lacking. He can't do it alone, so he asks basically everyone there is for help, everyone who ever owed him a favor. The list of those includes, but is not limited to, the whole Batfam, Batman Inc, and misc Gotham vigilantes; Titans, late 80-s iteration; Talia al Ghul; Wilson family (Slade didn't wave the fee but he gave a discount because he also has a bone to pick with people who do experiments on children to turn them into weapons); Outlaws. From the legal side of things, Kate Spencer/Manhunter (hell yeah a US government vs Gen O lawsuit), from the political, Barbara Gordon, who was at this point the mayor of Gotham and is running for the governor.

The head scientist had died in a freak accident (very sad) but other scientists become the first ones to be prosecuted for illegal human experimentation. As does the guys from the government side who put them up to it.

(this could have ended very differently, bc at first I came up with a scenario where Jason has to give himself up for the case to move forward; he would then be tried as a terrorist and be given death penalty, where, after the sentence is carried out, he's found by Harvey Dent - and he decides to join him bc a) he's dead anyway and b) to go undercover and ensure no funny business here)

[xtruss]

Pakistan’s Shams Elections Rigged By The Corrupt Pakistan $$$ Army Generals!

Ryan Grim On "We’ve Got People, Pakistan Edition" Below Is An Email From Ryan Grim, The Intercept's D.C. Bureau Chief. He Regularly Shares These Updates With Readers.

When covering the politics of foreign countries, it’s hard for me not to transpose what’s going on there back onto the United States and try to see it from that perspective. That’s made easier in Pakistan since we have roughly similar population sizes and much of Pakistani politics plays out in spectacle on Twitter and Facebook. That much of it is in English helps too (as does the “translate” button).

Yet what Pakistani voters managed to pull off over the past few days strains my imagination to its breaking point. I just can’t picture us doing it.

Consider this: The leading opposition party, the populist PTI, led by legendary cricket star Imran Khan, was officially banned from the ballots by the courts. Its candidates were forced to run as independents instead. The candidates were prohibited from using the PTI’s party symbol – a cricket bat – on the ballot, a crucial marker in a country where some 40 percent of the population can’t read. Khan himself was jailed on bogus charges and ruled ineligible to run. Candidates who did file to run were abducted and tortured and pressured to withdraw. So were the new ones who then replaced them. Virtually the entire party leadership was imprisoned or exiled. Rallies were attacked and bombed; rank and file workers jailed and disappeared. Campaigning was basically impossible as candidates had to go into hiding.

On election day Thursday, polling locations were randomly changed and the internet and cell service was taken down. Western media described the race as over, a fait accompli for the military’s preferred candidate Nawaz Sharif. And yet.

And yet. Pakistani voters came out in such historic numbers that it caught the military off guard. The ISI — Pakistan’s powerful intelligence agency — was prepared to steal a close election or nudge Sharif to his inevitable victory, but they were swamped by the tsunami they didn’t see coming. In a crucial mistake, they had allowed individual polling locations to release official vote tallies, which parties and TV broadcasters could then total up themselves.

According to those broadcasts, watched by millions of people, PTI (or “independent”) candidates had won 137 seats by official counts, well on their way to a majority (there are 342 seats in the National Assembly; 266 are filled by direct elections). There were another 24 seats where 90 percent of the vote was counted and PTI was ahead. It was a clear landslide.

Then the military moved in, shutting down the election commission website and halting the count. Military and police forces surged into polling locations. Fantastical numbers began to be announced, sometimes just reversing the totals so the winner became the loser. The military was clearly unprepared to steal such a resounding victory, and the obviousness of the fraud forced politicians in the UK and U.S., including even the State Department, to denounce it.

All of this puts the State Department in a difficult position. It’s widely known the U.S. is no fan of Imran Khan. The U.S. prefers to work directly with the Pakistan military as a check against China. Khan has long said he wants a better relationship with the U.S., yet we refuse to believe him – our preferred approach was to oust him, put in more pliant clients, and shrug as the military dismantled democracy in the runup to the election. (The U.S. denied playing a role in ousting him, but we very much did, as The Intercept reported.)

That approach has now failed. The military-backed client proved unable to run their own country, losing all faith from the Pakistani people. The establishment in Pakistan may still be able to form a coalition government through fraud and abuse, but that doesn’t mean they’ll come out on top. The Pakistani people showed they can’t be held back anymore. When their will finally translates into real power is only a matter of time. The U.S. can delay it, but can’t stop it.

At this point, the State Department’s choice is either to respect the will of the Pakistani public and find a way to work with Khan, or discard all the talk about democracy and usher in a full military dictatorship, one without the pretense of even a civilian hybrid. It’s not clear which route we’ll take, but the pressure from Congress and the fairly strong statement from the State Department suggests the generals may be losing favor in Washington.

On Thursday afternoon at the State Department, I told spokesperson Vedant Patel that the military’s clear strategy after the election was to abduct, torture, and bribe the independent candidates into switching parties. If PTI candidates won the election, I asked, but were coerced into changing parties, would the U.S. recognize such a government? My mistake was asking a hypothetical, even an easily foreseeable one, because spokespeople are good at ignoring such questions. Patel called it a “made up” scenario and wouldn’t commit either way.

One winning candidate, Waseem Qadir, has already flipped. Elected to the national assembly as a PTI-affiliated independent, he claims he was abducted and is now supporting Nawaz Sharif’s party. Skeptics believe he was actually bribed, not tortured, and there protests outside his home – but either way, neither scenario is remotely democratic. The scenario is no longer made up, it’s real, and the State Department has some decisions to make.

I wrote in more detail about all of this on Friday and talked about it with my colleague Murtaza Hussain and Pakistani journalist Waqas Ahmed on Breaking Points.

Anyway, can you imagine American voters overcoming those sorts of obstacles to get to the polls? I want to leave you with the opening anecdote from my story Friday, one of the most inspiring (and infuriating stories I’ve ever come across in politics):

Pakistan, a bystander happened to catch, on camera, police raiding the Sialkot home of Usman Dar. At the time, Dar was an opposition candidate representing former Prime Minister Imran Khan’s Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf, or PTI, party — which the military and its civilian allies were busy suppressing with abductions, raids, blackmail, and threats. Khan, a populist prime minister, was forced from office in 2022 under military pressure with the encouragement of the U.S.

Through a window, video shows Pakistani police officials assaulting Dar’s elderly mother, Rehana Dar, in her bedroom. Dar’s brother, Umar Dar, was also picked up, though police only acknowledged he’d been arrested much later at a court hearing. When Usman Dar emerged from custody, he announced he was stepping down from the race and leaving the party — as many other PTI candidates have done under similar pressure.

But then came a new wrinkle, a symbol of the refusal of Khan’s supporters to bow to the military-backed government. While the news was announced that Dar was withdrawing from the race, and with another son still missing, his mother went on television to say that she would be running instead. “Khawaja Asif,” Rehana Dar said in a video posted on social media directed to the army-backed political rival of her son, “You have achieved what you wanted by making my son step down at gunpoint, but my son has quit politics, not me. Now you will face me in politics.”

She was a political novice, an angry mother who represented the country’s frustration with its ruling elite. “Send me to jail or handcuff me. I will contest the general elections for sure,” she said while filing her nomination papers. Those papers were initially rejected — like they were for so many PTI candidates, and only PTI candidates — and she had to refile.

Nevertheless, she persisted. On Thursday night, election night, with her son Umar still in custody, she shocked the country. With 99 percent of precincts counted, she had beaten that lifetime politician, Khawaja Asif, with 131,615 to 82,615 votes. The loss by Asif, who was allied with Nawaz Sharif — the military-backed candidate whose victory Vox had called “almost a fait accompli” — was a blow to the army.

Then came one more wrinkle — one that many in Pakistan expected, but which was still shocking. When the full results were announced, Dar’s total had been reduced by 31,434 votes, while Asif gained votes, and he was declared the winner.

Across the country, similar reversals are flowing out from Pakistan’s election commission. As polling ended Thursday evening, early results shocked the establishment and even some dispirited supporters of Khan who had worried that Pakistani authorities had successfully done everything they could to manipulate the outcome. Those results suggested a landslide victory for ousted former Prime Minister Imran Khan’s party even as Khan himself sits in prison, ineligible to run.

But in several key races, results have suddenly swung toward the military-backed party, after hours of unexplained delays. In the NA-128 constituency, where the PTI-backed candidate is senior lawyer Salman Akram Raja, Raja was leading with 100,000 votes in 1,310 out of 1,320 polling stations. On Friday, he was trailing by 13,522 votes. But the publicly available totals from the polling stations did not add up with the results announced by the election commission. He took the case to high court, which granted him a stay and stopped the election commission from announcing the winner pending further investigation. Following his lead, multiple PTI candidates have announced that they will take their cases to court. Rehana Dar is one of them.

[ruksarsblog]

How many times can I enter the Baby bel Back to School Friends Contest?

Are you ready to dive into the excitement of the Babybel Back to School Friends Contest? As the contest buzzes with energy, many participants find themselves asking a crucial question: "How many times can I enter the Babybel Back to School Friends Contest?" Let's unravel this mystery and explore the ins and outs of contest participation.

Contest Rules and Regulations

Before we delve into the entry frequency, it's essential to familiarize ourselves with the contest rules. Every competition has its guidelines, and understanding them is the first step toward maximizing your chances of winning.

Understanding the Entry Limit

Now, let's tackle the big question—how many times can you enter the Babybel Back to School Friends Contest? The answer lies in the official rules, typically available on the contest website. Many contests have a daily or weekly entry limit, ensuring fair participation for all.

Benefits of Multiple Entries

You might wonder, "Why would I want to enter multiple times?" Well, more entries often mean more opportunities to win. Each entry increases your chances of catching the attention of the judges and securing that coveted spot as a contest winner.

Strategies for Maximizing Entries

To make the most out of the entry limit, consider strategic approaches. Plan your entries strategically throughout the contest period to maintain a consistent presence without overwhelming the judges.

Important Dates and Deadlines

Mark your calendars! Knowing the essential dates and deadlines ensures you won't miss out on any opportunities. Whether it's the last day to enter or the date of the grand prize announcement, staying informed is key.

Past Winners and Success Stories

To inspire your contest journey, let's take a moment to celebrate past winners and their success stories. These individuals once asked the same question you are asking now but turned their queries into victories.

Contest Participation Tips

Eager to stand out from the competition? Explore our expert tips on enhancing your contest participation. From creative entries to thoughtful captions, we've got you covered.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Q: Is there a limit to how many times I can enter the contest each day?

A: The daily entry limit varies, so be sure to check the official rules for precise details.

Q: Can I enter on behalf of my friends and family?

A: Most contests allow entries on behalf of others, but ensure you follow the specified guidelines.

Q: Are there age restrictions for entering the contest?

A: Check the official rules for any age restrictions. Some contests may have specific age requirements.

Q: How are winners selected in the Babybel Back to School Friends Contest?

A: Winners are typically chosen based on the creativity and originality of their entries, as outlined in the contest rules.

Q: Can I edit my entries after submission?

A: In most cases, entries cannot be edited once submitted. Make sure to double-check before finalizing your submission.

Engaging with the Babybel Community

Contests are not just about winning; they're also about connecting with like-minded individuals. Engage with the Babybel community, share your experiences, and make lasting connections.

Promotional Activities and Bonus Entries

Stay tuned for any promotional activities or bonus entry opportunities. Sometimes, brands offer additional chances to win through special promotions or challenges.

Social Media Presence

In the age of social media, your online presence matters. Leverage platforms like Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook to showcase your creativity and increase your visibility.

Creating Memorable Entries

Capture the judges' attention by crafting memorable entries. Whether it's a heartwarming story or a creative photo, leave a lasting impression that sets you apart.

Contest Impact on Brand Loyalty

Participating in contests can go beyond winning prizes; it can build brand loyalty. Engage with the brand, share your positive experiences, and become a loyal advocate.

Conclusion

In conclusion, the Babybel Back to School Friends Contest is an exciting opportunity to showcase your creativity and possibly win fantastic prizes. Understand the rules, strategize your entries, and enjoy the journey. Best of luck, and may your entry stand out among the rest!

FAQs

Q: Can I enter the contest multiple times in a single day?

A: The daily entry limit varies, so check the official rules for specific details.

Q: Are there any restrictions on the type of entries allowed?

A: Review the contest guidelines to ensure your entries align with the specified criteria.

Q: Can I withdraw my entry after submission if I change my mind?

A: Once submitted, entries are usually final. Double-check before finalizing your submission.

Q: Is there a limit to how many prizes one person can win in the Baby bel Back to School Friends Contest?

A: Contest rules typically outline any restrictions on the number of prizes an individual can win.

Q: How will I be notified if I win a prize in the contest?

A: Winners are often notified via email or through the contact information provided during entry.

[aijamisespava]

Favorite Song From Each Country! Part 8/37: Switzerland!

Ah yes, hello everyone! If you're reading this, then it is time for me to tell you about my favorite song from yet another country from 2009 onward. I've talked with someone about some stuff afterward, which will certainly help tide us over a little bit to help with the Post-Eurovision Depression (because sometimes we want more than memes and compilations)!

So, what's next for us? Switzerland!

Well, here we are with the country well known for winning the very very first contest all the way back in 1956! Oh yeah, plus their second win was with a song by someone named...CELINE DION! Needless to say, Switzerland has certainly found a place in Eurovision history, and a little bit of music history as well. For me, it makes personal history as the first (and so far only) country to have been my personal winner TWICE! That's right...I've had different countries win all my other rankings, except for Switzerland. So, let's get to the favorite and my 2023 thoughts (I've been looking forward to this one)!

Favorite Entry: I want to start off by saying that my favorite Swiss entry is my favorite Eurovision song. Period. End of story. And that it's Gjon's Tears' "Tout l'univers" from 2021. This is one of the first non-winners that I've heard (not counting Iceland's 2020 entry that randomly popped up on my Facebook feed during the pandemic). So, imagine hearing and liking "Fairytale," "Arcade," and "Zitti e Buoni" and thinking that those songs slap, knowing they won. And then you hear a non-winner and you think "Wow. If a song like this didn't win, IMAGINE what other songs are out there!" So, to be 100% honest, I doubt that I would be here writing this if it weren't for that song. Also, I'm putting a link to the song that would send you to Gjon's debut album (that he put "Tout l'univers" on). It came out a little over a month ago and it's really good with so many other songs and a variety of vibes! RANK: 3rd in 2021 Grand Final/PERSONAL RANK: 1st of 39 Countries *and 1st of God-Knows-How-Many Entries*

Thoughts on 2023 Entry: Alright, we have Remo Forrer with "Watergun" this year. After the blazing success of "Tout l'univers" in 2021, Switzerland has been sending ballads. Which, as someone who likes ballads, I don't see it as bad. "Watergun" follows that format. And aside from the theme being rather...ironic (iykyk), it's actually not that bad. Remo's voice is excellent, and I absolutely love that beginning piano. It's one of my mom's favorites from this year too! Other than that, I don't have much else to say about it because it ranked rather mid-pack for me. I liked some entries more, but I liked it more than others. RANK: 20th in 2023 Grand Final/PERSONAL RANK: 23rd of 37 Countries

[wordtowords]

Chris, Mick, and the Art of Artifice

artifice - noun - clever devices used to trick or deceive (Google).

Let's face the music and accept that for whatever reason(s), human beings embrace the concept of deception. And now that the Internet (via social media) has opened the backstage door for endless opportunities for a little or a lot of artifice, no one is safe from scammers, or in my case, ordinary people pretending to be rock stars.

Because I am in the music business along with just about everyone else, I have to spend time on social media just advertise my original songs and get them circulating among listeners throughout the globe. Although I am a minuscule presence on TikTok, Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter, Linked-In, Facebook, I try to post at least three times a week to generate a following, which isn't easy as there are 100,000 songs released on the music streaming channels daily and 100,000 artists promoting them. Apparently as FB is the medium of choice for celebrities, more grifters use it to impersonate them than any other platform. I am lucky because the con artists who hit on me generally do not want money; they just want to take me to bed. Case in point, one man, who just happens to have the name Christopher Cross like the musician (who is actually the real imposter since his surname isn't actually Cross) tried to impersonate him in order to trick me into meeting him. Fortunately, I was onto him right from the start. Just in case this should ever happen to you (maybe on YouTube in the comments section), an authentic celebrity would never ask you when you became his or her fan. And most likely as an icebreaker, he or she would never thank you for being his or her fan. I know from experience that unless they are extreme narcissists, celebrated people tend to want to step away from themselves for a few and come across as being average. So it was clear that Chris wasn't the celebrated Chris since he made the mistake of doing what all trolls do initially: he asked, "How long have you been my fan?" (I replied, "I've never been your fan." Oh, well. You can fool some of the people some of the time, but not all of the people all of the time.)

Of course, it is true that there are famous types out there who do interface with fans and do use artifice (such as different names) so that they don't attract attention. I am contending with someone right now who claims to be Micheal Philip Jagger, which is Mick Jagger's full name. Even though he has the blue checkmark verifying his identity, my daughter claims that he is in no way real, mainly because eighty-year-old men don't know how to navigate FB. Sensible, smart she contends that Mick no doubt has troops of well-paid assistants assigned to connect with the public on social media. The real Mick, romantically linked to a thirty-six-year-old dancer, would not have a second to reach out to me. Which all makes sense, yet this inchoate swindler is atypical so far. Like Macbeth and most politicians after him, Micheal could just be quite good at duplicity until some day, his artifice is exposed as such, and he is uncovered and cancelled (the beauty of social media).

On the other hand, I did read an article on the web stating that you can never truly be sure whether or not you are being hoodwinked. It is possible that the person is indeed the person he or she says he or she is. Just make sure you don't wire any money to him or her and you don't friend him or her. As far as my Micheal, I am playing his game, pretending I don't realize that he is attempting to be Mick. And I am acting as though I am the bigger celeb whose privacy is kept private. In the end, the greater pretender will win, I suppose, if there can be a winner at shenanigans. Let's put it this way, if the actual Mick should die, and Micheal keeps liking my posts, I'll have my answer. (I hope it doesn't come down to that, though, because I am Mick's fan.)

The obvious paradoxical takeaway here is that sometimes you have to be deceptive in order to expose deception. Truth doesn't come easily.

#word-to-words, #slice-of-life,  #blog, #blogging, #editorial, #reading, #vocabulary, #ReadersMagnet, #spilled thoughts, #good advice, #personal-essay, #writing community, #writing, #philosophy, #truth, #social media, #deception, #human nature

[alpileanwebsite2023]

Alpilean Reviews Amazon

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[solatgif]

TGIF: Roundup for January 20, 2023

We shared timely articles this week with Heidi Wong writing Reflections for Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Eddy Wu explaining The Tension of Lunar New Year for Asian and Asian American Christians, and Vera Christian sharing A Neglected Key to Ministry Success.

Hannah Chao and I have an upcoming podcast to take you behind-the-scenes of the new edition of our SOLA Network Magazine! Join us on YouTube and Podcasts and you’ll see it as soon as we release it.

This newsletter is one of the many ways you can keep in touch with us. Find us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. For more, check out my Asian American Worship Leaders Facebook group and TGIF Playlist on Spotify. You can reach me on Twitter and Instagram.

Enter to win! Can we find meaning in the pains of being a mom? In God is Still Good, Katie Faris helps you find gospel hope and comfort for the unexpected sorrows of motherhood. 1 winner will receive a physical copy of this beautiful book. Thanks to Crossway for providing this book for our giveaway, in partnership with my newsletters for @diveindigdeep and FCBC Walnut.

Articles From Around The Web

Leslie Ko: Are Some Chinese New Year Traditions “Unchristian”?

Many Chinese New Year traditions are about luck and fortune. So how can a Christian celebrate the lunar new year?

Sean Cheng: Consider the Rabbit: Applying the Bible to the Chinese Zodiac

A Chinese New Year reflection on how the gospel informs our feasting and transforms astrology culture.

Isabel Ong: Seek Prosperity Properly During Lunar New Year

It’s not wrong to celebrate our blessings. But Asian theologians and pastors advise how to do so in biblical, godly ways amid the festival’s red envelopes and best wishes.

Check out the new edition of our SOLA Network Magazine! Download it for free and share it with your friends as a great way to be introduced to the work we do at SOLA Network.

Books, Podcasts, Music, And More

Trevin Wax: Chinese House Churches ‘Crazy for the Gospel’

“Although Wang Yi’s church is Reformed, his insistence on the separation of church and state resembles the legacy of the Baptists. He pulls no punches in describing the eternal consequences that await those who hinder the church’s freedom to serve her Lord.”

The London Lyceum Podcast: Neo-Calvinism with Cory Brock and Gray Sutanto

What is Neo-Calvinism? When did it begin? Why did it begin? Main figures of note? Is Neo-Calvinism a deviation from classical Protestantism? Why does it sometimes have a negative connotation? Is Christianity truly universal enough to use any culture or philosophy? Should we not be tied down to certain dogmatic elements in the patristic or medieval era? What is the difference between common grace and natural law? Is Principled Pluralism a characteristic of Neo-Calvinism? Is it sustainable? And more!

Aaron Lee: Related Works

Book Reviews: God is Still Good by Katie Faris, The Call to Follow by Richard Langer and Joanne J. Jung, Sanctuary by Denise J. Hughes, Truly, Truly, I Say to You by Adam Ramsey, God’s Very Good Idea Board Book by Trillia Newbell. Listen to our TGIF playlist on Spotify. Join my Asian American Worship Leaders Facebook group.

Subscribe to our podcast for our interviews, messages, and article reads! Available for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube.

Featured This Week On SOLA Network

Heidi Wong: What to Remember While Praying for Ukraine

“As you pray for Ukraine, be wise and do not simply accept optimistic quips just because ‘all wars eventually come to an end.’ Instead, take stock of what you believe based on who God has revealed himself to be.”

Vera Christian: A Neglected Key to Ministry Success

“God used my husband to gently challenge my workaholic ways. He saw their effects on me and suggested the unthinkable: He invited me to consider going on a three-day retreat for leaders. What?!?! I resisted at first but finally agreed because I had no better ideas. But it changed my life.”

Eddy Wu: The Tension of Lunar New Year for Asian and Asian American Christians

“Asian and Asian American believers must carefully navigate their family dynamics in an attempt to be loving members of their household and also maintain their faithfulness to Christ.”

Heidi Wong: Immersing Ourselves in God’s Vision: Reflections for Martin Luther King Jr. Day

“But like Dr. King, we are to immerse ourselves in God’s vision, serve our neighbor, and share the good news of Jesus Christ which provides a glimpse into heaven. Only then can God’s children know what home is truly like, and meet the one who has saved us.”

TGIF: Roundup for January 13, 2023

Chinese Pastors Can Teach You What John Calvin Can’t / Pray Kingdom Prayers: Three Requests We Often Neglect / How to Hold On to Faith When 2023 Gets Tough

General disclaimer: Our link roundups are not endorsements of the positions or lives of the authors.

[365elephantsoap]

THANKFUL FRIDAY

This week, we saw our first real snow of the season. Technically, there was snow a couple of weeks ago, but it happened early on Saturday morning with only a handful of people to witness it. Me being one of them since I get up with the sun even on Saturdays. The day turned out to be sunny and warm though and no one believed when I said that it had snowed that morning. This week was real, honest to goodness, snow that quickly melted. Though there is still some on the roof of my car. The weather was warm enough for the snow to melt on the ground, but then quickly fell back into freezing temperatures for the rest of the week. Morning walks do not happen during such conditions.

I have wavered between getting up and onto my mat in the early morning hours when I am usually walking Josephine and snuggling back down under the covers. The snuggling back down under the covers has been the winner for most mornings. I get up to open the pet door for Josephine and the cat. Then I hop right back under the covers. It only takes a few minutes of being out in the cold for Josephine to have the same idea. She comes running back inside and jumps on the bed as I lift the comforter for her. Then she curls her little body up as close as she can to mine. This is where we stay for another hour or so before I get up to feed her and the cat. Then Josephine and I have moment of snuggling and tussling while I wait for my turn in the shower.

At first I felt really guilty about not taking the walks. Especially because Josephine gets so freaking excited just at the sight of her leash. These moments of snuggle and play time that we have had this week eases that guilt of not walking. Michael’s moms had to say goodbye to their little dog over the weekend and then a Facebook friend had to say goodbye to her best kitty. So, I feel pretty good about skipping the walks in favor of showering Josephine with extra love.

Treats for everyone.

Speaking of treats for everyone. Today is Michael’s birthday. He’s been talking about being in his late forties for months now, sometimes with a tone of excitement and sometimes with a tone of dismay. Michael changed up is diet after our return from Vancouver. Then he made appointments with doctors and scheduled routine tests. He’s checking his blood pressure and monitoring his salt intake. He eats a banana every morning. It looks like he has plans to live past the age of fifty. Sometimes, I’m really surprised he sticks around (for various reasons), but then he talks about our future together. A lake house. Travel. Retirement. I am thankful for his random acts of kindness like yesterday morning when I walked out to my car and Michael had scraped my windshield for me. I am thankful for his raccoon/possum/even squirrel trapping skills that he didn’t even know he had until this year. I’m thankful for how he insists on getting my car washed which is something I never bothered doing unless I couldn’t see out the windows. I’m thankful that in spite of those vague various reasons that he still sticks around.

Here’s to surviving another rotation around the sun.

[phantom-le6]

Ramble of the month July 2022: Marvel Contest of Champions – Round 1 of a fan-fic based hero-on-hero clash of Marvel heroes

For July’s ramble, I’m back on the world of Marvel, but this time dealing with a whole different hypothetical scenario to the one before.  My initial Marvel-related Rambles of the month have all been focused on correcting and then developing the meme-fodder concept that was an alternative MCU started in the 1990’s.  This time, we’re looking at something else that’s more literary in its origins than cinematic, and something that I imagine will spark a fair bit of debate among any Marvel fans who happen across this article.

 Several years ago, before I started coming up with original novel ideas to start writing and developing, I had given up on the idea of being an original writer in favour of fan fiction.  However, as with many of my past literary efforts, I over-planned, creating a massive alternate version of Marvel lore.  So daunting was the idea of actually writing this massive continuity that I’ve all but totally abandoned it, but one concept has gone beyond its original fan-fiction parameters.

  Years ago, Marvel created a special publication known as the Contest of Champions. In this three-issue mini-series, a number of superheroes from around the world were chosen by the alien being known as the Grandmaster to compete in some sort of contest with the incarnation of Death for the life of the Collector.  Originally intended to commemorate the 1980 Moscow Olympics, the narrative was altered and released two year later because America refused to compete in those games, an act of protest against the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan in late 1979.

 Since this time, there have been sequels and adaptations of the contest, but none of them ever returned to anything resembling the original intent of the original series, which was to commemorate the Olympics.  Because of this, the idea I had for this contest in my fan-fiction world was that it would occur with Olympic-like frequency.  Once every four years, the Grandmaster would pop up and cajole all/most of Earth’s active hero community into competing against each other. Sometimes there would be a worthwhile prize for victory or a threat to be avoided by agreeing to the contest, other times it’d be some form of mental control making the heroes fight despite them not wanting to.  Whatever the rationale, the size of the hero population and its members would vary each time, which combined with changes to format, location, etc. would prevent the concept getting stale.

 Back at the beginning of the Covid pandemic when home-schooling became a thing everyone had to do, I posted a set of images on my Facebook page of the initial bouts in the first of my fan-fic contests.  The idea was that if parents I knew were struggling with things to keep their children busy and educated, and if those children were Marvel fans and old enough, they could ask them to analyse who would win the bouts I’d come up with.  Whether or not anyone actually did this, I don’t know, but since I never worked out for myself who I would have win the bouts, I thought it would be fun to go back and do a ramble, perhaps even multiple rambles, going through those bouts and working out the winners.

 Now for this, I’ll be doing what I hope anyone else looking at such bouts would do. In other words, rather than just arbitrarily picking a winner based on personal preference or telling a specific story, I’ll be looking at things from an impartial examination of key factors. These include powers and abilities, any weaponry/gadgets carried by default, perception biases and the fundamental nature of each character.  The analysis will also have some influence from the narrative outlines of my fan-fiction plans, so knowledge of events from any other Marvel continuities and their impacts aren’t going to factor in.  Also, as this would be the first contest, we’re looking at very basic knock-out fighting bouts between the heroes in plain, basic, gladiatorial arenas, so environment will mostly not be a factor either.

 So, without any further ado, let’s proceed to the first of a total of 16 bouts in the first round of this initial Contest of Champions:

Bout 1: Black Panther/T’Challa vs Falcon/Sam Wilson

Now before I get into this initial bout, I’m going to point out that all of the match-ups were random draw because I think the most interesting match-ups occur when it’s up to chance instead of being based on classic comic-based rivalries of who is stronger out of two heroes with super-strength, who is the faster speedster, etc.  With that in mind, our first bout pits the first Black superhero in comics history against the first African-American superhero in that same history.  It’s the king of Wakanda versus Cap’s high-flying partner.  Not too obvious who the winner would be at a casual glance, so let’s dive into some analysis.

 From a powers and abilities point of view, T’Challa is the classic trained-from-childhood warrior king, whereas Sam (at least in my fan-fic this is working off) started off as a part of gang in his teens, did a tour as an army paratrooper to get out of that life, and then became the Falcon and an Avenger not long after coming back to his old neighbourhood to work as a social worker. As such, neither is a slouch in a combat situation, but T’Challa has the edge in powers because his body is enhanced in various ways by the heart-shaped herb.

  Next, weaponry.  Sam is a trained falconer with a psychic link to his feathered partner Redwing, so in effect Falcon comes with Redwing as a kind of living weapon on top of his wing-suit, which in my fan-fic world is a Stark-tech invention.  By comparison, T’Challa is rocking a Vibranium-weave combat suit with claws and various weapons that use the same energy-absorbing metal.  As such, he’s at little risk from Redwing’s talons and beak, and since Vibranium can release any energy it absorbs under the right circumstances, it’s easy to see T’Challa taking both his foes out just with what he’s got to hand.

  Now to consider the psychological factors.  Neither combatant is going to be in the dark on who their opponent is; Sam’s in the Avengers by this point and T’Challa’s a major head of state as well as being a superhero.  As such, there’s no perception errors to bias either of their mind-states.  However, Sam won’t have the level of education T’Challa has, especially in combat and tactics.  In other words, sooner or later the Panther will ground the Falcon.

Bout 1 winner: Black Panther.

Bout 2: Mister Fantastic/Reed Richards vs Scarlet Witch/Wanda Maximoff

As I write this bout’s analysis, I’m trying very hard to avoid spoilers on the new Doctor Strange film, but I am aware from memes there’s an encounter between these characters.  However, since I’m looking at a fan-fic world I started tooling around with long before that film was even announced, even if I had seen the film by now it would make no difference.  So, let’s consider these two characters from the reality I’m dealing with.

 In terms of powers, you’ve got elasticity versus the more classical concept of mutant (not mutate, but mutant) hex bolts.  Both characters are quite capable in the use of their powers and there’s no obvious advantage in pitting one power against the other.  However, this is where abilities tell a different story. Our Reed Richards is still very much a top-level intellect, potentially the smartest human in the world, and he’s got a huge level of scientific knowledge combined with nearly four years’ worth of experience leading the Fantastic Four.  That’s a lot of academic and combat smarts to pit against a young woman just going to university after a few months with Magneto’s Brotherhood, followed by just under three years being educated at Professor X’s school as a potential X-Man.

 When you look at the characters in that context, Reed’s greater age and life experience combined with his intellect and greater combat expertise gives him a sizeable advantage over a relative neophyte like Wanda.  Weaponry and gadgets don’t enter in for either character, so we’re swiftly on to the matter of psychological factors.  Now in my fan-fic, the F4 have pride of place as first superheroes out of the starting blocks like they did in the comics, so as a still slightly impressionable woman in her late teens, Wanda’s going to be adversely impacted by a bit of being star-struck going against the great Reed Richards.  By comparison, Reed is someone who comes at things from a position of near-total logic, so he’s not going to have any biases working against him.  He’s also going to have a good idea how to take Wanda out even without tech to hand, whereas Wanda may not have been taught exactly what she needs to overcome someone with Reed’s powers.  All in all, I’m seeing this as a clash that only runs as long as Reed needs it to, and it’ll be him walking into the next round when it’s over. 

Bout 2 winner: Mister Fantastic

Bout 3: Doctor Strange/Dr Stephen Strange vs Psylocke/Elisabeth Braddock

Speaking of Dr Strange, our third bout pits the master of the mystic arts against another of Xavier’s prospective X-Men from his “first class” of the fan-fic world, the telepathic Brit known as Psylocke. At this point, Betsy Braddock is still in her original White Brit incarnation and not yet subject to the body-shift plot that changed her over to an Asian body, something only reversed in the past few years in comics.  As such, we’re pitting her original powers as a telepath that can generate psi-blasts against Strange’s myriad array of spells.

  Given that spells are as much about mental prowess as any gestures or arcane artifacts, and Psylocke is a mind-reader and mind-blaster, she’s going to have a slight edge over Strange in the powers area.  After all, he’s probably going to need to take time incanting or gesturing to pull off any psychic divination whereas Psylocke isn’t so encumbered.  As such, one might think Strange could revert to physical combat as an alternative, using martial arts as an alternative to less reliable spell-work.  The problem here is the damage to Strange’s hands might make him less inclined to hit out with them, and so any combat skills Betsy picked up with the X-Men gain credence over Strange’s martial arts abilities.

  Going into weapons and gadgets, Psylocke is sorely lacking in this area while Strange has the Eye of Agamotto and the Cloak of Levitation.  The latter’s ability to fly does add to Strange’s combat options, but going airborne against a mind-blaster is perhaps poor tactics.  Bottom line, unless Strange gets a chance to cast a spell shielding his thoughts that can withstand Psylocke’s psi-blasts, nothing in this line really helps him.

  This then brings us to the psychological factors.  Strange’s world and that of the X-Men are both relative secrets, so that’s going to lead to ignorance on both sides.  However, Strange has a history of arrogance, Psylocke a history of being underestimated for her well-presented English upper-class exterior, and the latter is a telepath.  That means Psylocke can goad Strange into arrogantly under-estimating her before he’s even twigged to what her powers are, and that sets him up for a major fall. In other words, this fight’s the first one to be won by someone linked to the world of the X-Men.

Bout 3 winner: Psylocke

Bout 4: Thor vs Ms Marvel/Carol Danvers

If there’s one thing the MCU did better than the comics, it was to treat Thor as a character without a dual identity, so that’s the way I’m looking at the Thor in this clash.  By comparison, as someone who prizes the X-Men above most other Marvel creations, it should be of little surprise to knowledgeable Marvel fans that my fan fic would honour the idea of Carol Danvers being Ms Marvel, getting her powers swiped by Rogue and then Rogue turning to the X-Men, Carol getting other powers similar to her original ones, etc.  As such, this bout is more or less a movie-like Thor versus a 70’s-comics-like version of Carol Danvers.

 Now I say comic-like because the one power Carol Danvers had as Ms Marvel that I don’t care for as it was is that so-called “seventh sense” of hers.  As such, my fan-fic would have this power tweaked; instead of being a random pre-cognitive flash, it’s be more immediate pre-cognitive flashes during combat, with Carol “seeing” all the moves her opponent can make in the next few seconds, the clarity of each option being dictated by its probability.  In other words, the clearer and brighter the mental image, the more likely that’s what the other person will do.  Now combine that with the super-strength, flight and near-invulnerability, and you might think Carol has the advantage in powers.

  However, Thor is also strong and virtually invulnerable, and he can also fly, meaning both combatants are potentially even stevens.  In addition, Thor is bringing lightning to the table, and he’s got centuries of combat experience behind him whereas Carol is rocking only years of combat experience.  Add in the pair being team-mates, and Thor’s got the advantage; he can use his lightning on a wide-spread to force Carol into having to pick a wound instead of avoiding them, thereby negating her “seventh sense” ability.  Thor also has the advantage in weaponry, being armed with Mjolnir while Carol is unarmed and yet to manifest any kind of ranged fighting capability.

  This then brings us to the mental factors; Thor’s someone who has well-learned his lesson of humility, and he’s not going to be easily goaded back to arrogance, and Carol is a former military woman, so she knows how to keep her cool in combat as much as Thor at this point.  Neither would hold back much in combat, however, since they’re both warriors after a fashion, but ultimately Thor has a weapon, a ranged attack and a much greater degree of experience, so this fight is going to the Asgardian prince.

Bout 4 winner: Thor

Bout 5: Thing/Ben Grimm vs Captain America/Steve Rogers

This one’s the bout from Brooklyn; both Ben Grimm of the F4 and super-soldier Steve Rogers hail from this single borough of New York City, albeit initially separated by a few decades.  Power-wise, Ben’s got the edge thanks to his super-strength and rock-like skin, whereas Steve is rocking more comic-like power levels. In other words, a normal human at peak physical condition, but with a super-soldier serum that combats fatigue poisons in his system to give him incredible endurance and stamina. However, Ben is primarily a street-brawler whose fighting skills are a mish-mash of his mis-spent youth in the Yancy Street gang and whatever military combat training he got en route to becoming a pilot and astronaut.

  By comparison, Steve Rogers has more extensive real-combat experience from his time as a soldier in World War II, combined with his later experience working as part of the Avengers.  Combine that with Steve still packing the well-known Adamantium-Vibranium alloy shield where Ben is unarmed, and Cap starts to look like a slightly better option. However, the real edge comes from the psychological considerations; Cap is a living legend and most superheroes are more likely to be in awe of him than he is of them.  As such, even to someone with Ben’s military background and standing with the F4, there’s going to be a reluctance to fully commit to fighting the star-spangled Avenger.  As a result, Cap’s getting in an early win here.

Bout 5 winner: Captain America

Bout 6: Iron Man/Tony Stark vs Wolverine/Logan

Genius billionaire playboy philanthropist, or rather his perceived bodyguard, versus the best there is at what he does.  Iron vs Adamantium, Shellhead versus the “ol’ canuckle-head”.  Power-wise, Wolverine starts out at a major advantage; enhanced physique and senses and a rapid healing factor backed up by bone claws that have been coated in Adamantium along with the rest of his skeleton.  Compare that and his decades of combat experience to Stark’s tech brilliance and Wolverine has a clear and present edge.

 Where Stark can reduce that edge is mainly in the Iron Man armour itself.  His repulsor rays can put out high levels of force with each blast, and he doubtless has a few minor weapons that are mainly light and sound; ideal antagonists against a mutant who is vulnerable to sensory overload.  Moreover, the suit can fly and Wolverine lacks the means to hit someone at range, so if Iron Man stays at range, much of Wolverine’s advantage is nullified.

 As such, it really comes down to mental factors, and the simple reality is that for his efforts to be a man, Wolverine is very much a force of nature unto himself, and within that berserker side of himself lies the ability to overcome a Stark bereft of prep time and resources to create any customised Wolvie-buster armour. Sooner or later, ol’ shellhead’s going to get suckered and lose.

Bout 6 winner: Wolverine

Bout 7: Wasp/Janet Van Dyne vs Storm/Ororo Monroe

The size-changing young heiress and socialite among the Avengers taking on the X-Men’s resident weather-witch and childhood pick-pocket and sneak-thief.  Ororo is rocking a clear and present advantage in both powers and experience because although she’s another “first class” student now studying away from the X-Mansion at university, she’s already had to fend for herself in combat more than Janet Van Dyne ever has.  Storm is also a woman of keen senses, so it’s not like Janet going small can be argued as something to work in her favour.

 Psychologically speaking, Janet’s spoiled rich girl background and the naiveté that brings with it just seal her downfall.  She’s not going to give Storm much credit and put too much stock in her own status as an Avenger.  That’s going to be her downfall and, were I ever to get around to writing the fan-fic this is all based in, it would be a major learning moment in how not to be the brat her early comic incarnation and Avengers: EMH version were.

Bout 7 winner: Storm

Bout 8: Invisible Girl/Susan Storm vs Impasse/Dr Cecilia Reyes

For anyone who is wondering who the latter opponent is, Dr Cecilia Reyes was brought into the X-Men lore in the comics back in the late 90’s during the story arc known as Zero Tolerance.  Years later, she was somewhat mis-adapted into a villain role in the New Mutants film.  For those wondering about the code-name, that’s something I’ve added just because in my fan-fic, she’s one of a few proto-X-Men that are there just to give the “first class” some teachers who can train them and then split when said class is old enough to teach.

  Now both these characters rock force-fields as super-powers, but Sue can also turn invisible whereas Cecilia can’t, so that puts the advantage in the hands of the F4’s resident female member.  Combat experience would be roughly even between the two, and there’s no weaponry or gadgets to consider here.  This only leaves psychological factors, and that’s where Susan’s power advantage gets added to considerably.  Ultimately, Cecilia is as reluctant to be donning an X-Uniform and fighting here as she is in the comics, being more at ease in the areas of medicine and academia.  That reluctance means Susan is taking this clash of the force-field wielders hands-down.

Bout 8 winner: Invisible Girl

Bout 9: Spider-Man/Peter Parker vs Banshee/Sean Cassidy

The original web-head at about university age versus an X-Man with a background as a beat cop and an Interpol agent. Banshee’s greater experience certainly gives him a sizeable advantage over Spider-Man, but that’s then countered by the power comparison.  The Irish mutant is only in possession of a sonic scream, whereas our resident wall-crawler is bringing spider-strength, speed and agility to the party along with his wall-crawling powers and spider-sense.  Granted, the wall-crawling doesn’t have much value in an open gladiatorial arena, but that spider-sense can help Peter avoid any tight-beam sonics that get hurled his way.

 In the gadgetry area, Spider-Man has his web-shooters while Banshee’s suit is designed to exploit his sonic screams for flight purposes.  Spidey’s gadgets provide the major advantage here because one well-placed web-shot to the mouth and Banshee’s ability to fly or strike at range is nullified.  Well, at least for a moment; given time, Banshee could just hum at the right frequency to break down the webbing sonically.

  That then brings us to the psychological factors.  I don’t see Banshee putting his all into a fight like this and probably holding back due to perceiving Spider-Man as a relative youth, around the same kind of age as mutants he’s been teaching as part of being an X-Man.  That hesitance is something Spidey as a still slightly callow youngster at times would probably be less squeamish about exploiting.  Ultimately, though, I think that the spider-sense and putting a web-block on the sonics let Spider-Man win this one.

Bout 9 winner: Spider-Man

Bout 10: Ant-Man/Giant-Man/Hank Pym vs Hulk/Bruce Banner

Ok, so a clash of two size-changing scientists, but the rationale behind those size-changes is hugely different.  Where Pym shrinks or grows at will thanks to his tech, Banner is a gamma-powered rage machine, and his larger size is capable of being sustained indefinitely where Pym’s starts to cause health problems quite quickly.  Throw in the Hulk’s massive strength increase compared to Pym’s, and from a power perspective, the Hulk is in an immediate lead.

 Shift then to experience; Pym is a reluctant combatant and probably only has a few years of slowly getting whatever Captain America tries to clue him in on.  By comparison, the Hulk relies mainly on his strength but has enough cunning to be an instinctively effective fighter.  Pym’s advantage of being able to call on insects via his helmet is fully negated by the Hulk’s sheer might despite his inherent lack of weapons, and the Hulk isn’t held back by a distaste for combat like Pym can be.  In other words, Hulk smash.

Bout 10 winner: Hulk

Bout 11: Cyclops/Scott Summers vs Domino/Neena Thurman

Co-leader of the “first class” at the X-Mansion alongside Storm going up against a recent addition to the Xavier School faculty. It’s a teenage university student Cyclops up against the adult and experienced mutant mercenary-turned-X-Man that is Domino, in contrast to her more typical X-Force depiction of the comics. Powers-wise, Domino would seem to have any bout sewn up solely on the basis of her power being that she always experiences good luck.  However, good luck is at times relative, and any form of luck is down to there being multiple outcomes where one is favourable.

  Now Cyclops is a highly skilled tactician in most incarnations, so he’d know by now that in this case, a wide-spread use of his optic blasts would negate Domino’s luck.  Much like with Thor’s lightning, if multiple attacks or a wide-spread area-affect attack comes at you, good luck is ultimately going to be catching the light end of it.  With Cyke’s optic blasts, we’re talking about force blasts and not heat vision as some (Fox) mistakenly believe.  As such, Cyclops actually has a potential lead in powers, but that’s then countered by Domino’s greater volume of combat experience. Domino is also armed with a few firearms, though as an X-Men her ordnance would have to be strictly non-lethal. This also gives her an edge for a weaponry/gadgets point of view.

  Lastly, we’re up to the mental factors, and frankly I don’t see either character having anything adversely impact their performances.  The simple reality is that Cyclops isn’t going to win this one, and it’s a win for Domino here.

Bout 11 winner: Domino

Bout 12: Quicksilver/Pietro Maximoff vs Nightcrawler/Kurt Wagner

X-Men: Evolution fans will probably be excited to see Quicksilver and Nightcrawler clashing, since their counterparts in that animated series did occasionally face off in various X-Men-on-Brotherhood clashes of that series.  This time, they’re both “first class” alumni, and while Quicksilver is down in New York City at university, Nightcrawler’s studying up at the X-Mansion, not wanting to hide his appearance but not ready to walk onto a college campus as the blue-furred demon-like mutant he is.  Yes, I said furred, Fox-verse fans; that’s another one the films got wrong.

 Anyway, less context and more analysis.  We’re pitting super-speed against teleportation, agility and the ability to become near-invisible in shadow.  In some environments, Nightcrawler could take the advantage, but in an open gladiatorial arena, speed had an undoubted edge.  It’s not a big one, mind, as Nightcrawler’s teleportation is near-instantaneous, but multiple ‘ports in a short span of time can be a major strain.  As such, Nightcrawler will more likely be just delaying the inevitable in that regard.

 Experience is virtually identical, save that Nightcrawler as a junior X-Man is getting more regular training at the time of competition than Quicksilver. Weaponry is a non-factor as this is an early Nightcrawler who is not yet in the habit of routinely using swords while Quicksilver has never been a noted weapon-wielding hero.  Psychologically, Pietro is known for his perceived arrogance that is actually frustration at dealing with anyone slower than himself. However, Nightcrawler is not someone who might be inclined to capitalise on this in a hero-on-hero bout unless the stakes were high or he was being manipulated into this.  Ultimately, Quicksilver is winning this by not very much, and it would be a hard-won thing indeed.

Bout 12 winner: Quicksilver

Bout 13: Marvel Girl/Jean Grey vs Daredevil/Matt Murdock

The penultimate “first class” member and well-known telepath/telekinetic versus the man without fear.  My fan-fic world lets Jean start under her original code-name from the comics, advance to a grown-up analogue, and the Phoenix/Dark Phoenix saga comes late to avoid ret-cons, resurrections, etc.  As such, we’re again talking about a teenage mutant studying outside the X-Mansion up against Marvel’s resident blind-lawyer-turned-vigilante.  Also, for those who wish there were more people with red hair shown in fictional worlds, this is actually a battle of the red-heads.

 So, to consider powers first, Jean is bringing telepathy and telekinesis to bear against Murdock’s hyper-senses.  Suffice it to say, Jean’s telepathy alone gives her a major advantage here because it lets her read Murdock’s mind and anticipate his actions. Add in telekinesis for ranged attacks and it’s hard to argue for Matt having much chance.  However, Matt has more training in physical combat, his martial arts background with mentor Stick may include some mental defensive exercises, and his hyper-senses are probably not so easy for Jean to confuse psychically.

 Weaponry-wise, Daredevil’s billy club will most likely be nullified by Jean’s telekinesis, and psychologically, I don’t see either person being overly impaired by anything.  Heck, as someone accustomed to seeing beyond Xavier’s wheelchair or Cyclops at times having to work blind because of some optic blast scenarios, Jean won’t really hold back if she learns Daredevil is blind.  As such, and again this is going be a bit more of a hard-fought outcome, it’s Marvel Girl for the win.

Bout 13 winner: Marvel Girl

Bout 14: Namor the Sub-Mariner vs Human Torch/Johnny Storm

For those reading this without a wider grounding in Marvel Comics, Namor is the approximate Marvel equivalent to Aquaman, though there are a lot of key differences between the two, which I won’t go on about here.  Well, except for the points that matter in this bout against Johnny Storm, the last of the F4 to have a bout in the opening round of this contest.  Now since gladiatorial bouts on land are unfair for a character like Namor, who though amphibious gets strength-depleted if away from water for an extended period of time, we’ll be assuming that he’s wearing his black-and-gold outfit that keeps him hydrated while on land.

  With a relatively fair contest thus assured, let’s consider the powers at play. Namor is all about hydration-dependent super-strength, the ability to breathe underwater or on land, and thanks to tiny wings on his ankles he can even fly.  By comparison, Johnny Storm’s power is fire, including the ability to become a human flaming torch and fly.  Now on spec, Johnny would seem to have the upper hand since his flame powers can be used to dehydrate Namor and weaken him, but as other super-strength characters have proven, a super-strength clap can produce flame-extinguishing blasts of air, and Namor is stronger and still able to fly while Johnny’s flame is out.

 Experience is something weighted in Namor’s favour, as he’s older and longer-lived, plus growing up as an Atlantean prince combined with combat experience in World War II alongside Captain America means a lot of combat education. By comparison, schoolyard spats and then a few years with the F4 would be about the sum of Johnny’s combat knowledge and experience.  Neither would be bringing any weapons to the bout, and gadget-wise Namor’s uniform is as close as it gets just to keep things fair.

 This then brings us to how the characters match-up psychologically. Both have reasons to pull their punches; Johnny is always afraid of burning someone, Namor is enamoured on Johnny’s sister and not about to unleash his full strength on the young hot-head out of some Atlantean concept of honour and nobility.  Both characters are also arrogant, Johnny due to his F4 fame, Namor due to his royal nature.  Ultimately, this fight will go to Namor just for him being the more experience fighter and able to extinguish Johnny’s power before the first firebolt can be thrown. Don’t expect any battle-cry from Namor when the bout occurs, though; he’ll probably save his shouts of “Imperius Rex” for the next round.

Bout 14 winner: Namor

Bout 15: Hercules vs Thunderbird/John Proudstar

At this point in my fan-fic world, Hercules is a co-Avenger with Thor and some of the other, while the short-lived original Thunderbird of the X-Men is getting just a slightly longer life-span to make his inevitable fall in battle just that bit more tragic.  Of course, that’s a little way off after this contest, which from a super-power perspective is about pitting the strength of an Olympian demi-god against the overall enhanced physique of a Native American mutant. Hercules has a major advantage here, and likewise his centuries of experience outshine however many years Proudstar has spent fighting.

 In terms of weaponry, Hercules might have his mace to hand, but I think he’d more likely leave that to one side to give Proudstar a more sporting chance. Psychologically, Hercules might not be as serious about the fight as Proudstar due to his arrogance, and that will goad the Apache mutant to quite a high level.  This means that ultimately neither fighter will be going at this with a level head, but ultimately that will be something Hercules can compensate for and Proudstar can’t, so this fight will end up going to the prince of power.

Bout 15 winner: Hercules

Bout 16: Angel/Warren Worthington III vs Beast/Hank McCoy

Another clash in the ranks of the X-Mansion to end the first round, and it’s another student-vs-teacher clash, as “first class” alumni-turned-university student Angel dukes it out with his former instructor and soon-to-be team-mate Beast.  Now to clarify, this is an original-style Angel without any of his later Archangel powers going up against the blue-furred ape-like iteration of Beast. That means we’re pitting flight, slightly enhanced strength and hollow bones to allow that flight and some enhanced sight and hearing against the Beast’s strength, agility and intelligence.

  It’s hard to see a clear advantage in powers.  Certainly, neither has ranged ability, and while Angel’s powers work best in a hit-and-run capacity, the Beast is among the few characters with the ability to prevent the running part with the right acrobatic feat.  As such, it’s experience essentially breaking the deadlock, as Beast has a bit more in that regard than Angel.  Weaponry and gadgets aren’t a factor here, and psychologically, it’s not as though there are any outstanding mental traits to tip the outcome beyond Beast’s previously noted intellect.  It’s a matter of brains and brain combining to beat a high-flying foe for this last bout.

Bout 16 winner: Beast

So, that’s all the first-round bouts from this fan-fic-based Contest of Champions examined, and the winners determined on the basis of rational analysis, a skill many debaters of such hypothetical scenarios would do well to learn.  Depending on what other ideas I have for Ramble articles between when I’ve written this and the end of July, subsequent rounds may follow shortly or after I’ve tackled some other items.  So, until next time, ta-ta for now.

[taxflower11]

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