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galene-gothic · 2 years

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Heyyyy cutie♥️✨Here for the game 🧚‍♀️

My initials-AJ✨💃

My Question- So I choose Picture 3 in your PAC and yes some of that really resonated for me thankyou for the accuracy 🙇🏻‍♀️✨🤌🏻

So I recently I have been struggling with my career as I always wanted to a doctor but had medical issues(lung infection) prior to my entrance and couldn’t clear it for a government seat(cause the private ones are way too expensive😭can’t afford it) but I gave it again.me and my anxiety and also migraine messed it up again and now I’m opting for B.Sc. Course but still at the back of my mind I want to be a doctor and I just don’t know how and what to do🤦🏻‍♀️Also this really messed up with my confidence and now don’t know what I should do and where is everything going ?And how do I develop confidence and believe in myself again?And yes I like doing painting(+digital art), writing,dancing!yes I have a Pisces MC(29 degree) 🙃but I can’t choose which one should I concentrate on more cause all these help me release stress,anger and anxiety and make me happy 🦢✨and how Do I find confidence in my skills which I know aren’t good enough now😕

Thankyousomuch for reading the rant if u are still here ? And I’m sorry if I made u uncomfortable 🙇🏻‍♀️I hope u understand 🥹and if u don’t want to answer it i totally understand and get ur point🫂✨

⅄ ◌ 🐏 ˖ Clarity ♡

Cards: the devil – the ace of wands (reversed).

I'm getting that you won't be satisfied emotionally if you do become a doctor. You might go in thinking that it's a stable career but you'll realise that that's not entirely true. At some point, you'll have only money to make yourself happy if you do become successful as a doctor and I feel like you're going to be distracted again and again when it comes to pursuing this career. When it comes to art though, you seem to be all talk, no work. You lack the willpower to make your dream come true. You also seem to lack self esteem. You will lack the commitment to succeed when it comes to this career. Compared to the previous path, this path seems to have a lot of physical blocks. Trying to pursue art is going to be stagnant for you. It's up to you to decide what you wish to do now.

⅄ ◌ 🐏 ˖ Your personality ♡

Cards: the king of wands (reversed) – the three of pentacles.

You might be kind of full of yourself and might not like to listen to other people's perspective, you aren't going to fight with them (you could though) but you're going to take it in from one ear and blow it out from the other. You might also be rude at times. I'm also getting an impulsive individual. You seem to have really high expectations from everyone and you can be ruthless if something doesn't go the way you want it to. You do things the way you want to do them and think that you're always right. You also love attention. You can go to extremes, like from being the nicest to being the meanest, being the warmest to being the coldest, being the most soft spoken to being the most dirty mouthed. I actually understand where you come from because you seem to be pretty good of a problem solver and might have pretty good communication skills. Your words might hold weight, be careful and use it to your advantage. You're probably a good listener and pretty generous too. However, you probably do not bend your values for anyone.

Thank you for participating <3

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googoojeu · 3 years

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i love you(s). || kim sunoo x gn!reader

;; kim sunoo has told you he loves you a lot, in different times and different circumstances, but only five stuck to you the most.

genre: fluff, angst, strangers to lovers au, a bit of exes to lovers au too, non-idol au, student!reader, student!sunoo

a/n: i rarely post stuff for sunoo so here i am with an angsty-fluffy fic for him! this wasn't proofread but i hope you guys enjoy this one! also this is quite long,,, deadass

warning(s): cursing, mentions of cheating (no one cheated tho), sunoo's a bit of a dick later in the story (sorry🙇🏻‍♀️)

— :: lowercase intended!

if you remembered correctly, the first time kim sunoo told you he loved you, it was out of habit.

you got yourself two hours of detention after coming to school ten minutes late and for apparently "disrespecting" a teacher (you just pointed out the spelling mistake on the board). you stared at the wall clock above the chalkboard, staring at the numbers and waiting for it's arms to reach six o'clock.

it was currently four thirty-three in the afternoon, with your chin resting in one hand and the other drumming on the table, the classroom's door opens and reveals a disheveled seventeen year old boy, bending down to catch his breath. the teacher side eyes him before instructing him what to do. he nods and waddles over to the seat next to you.

you were completely in your own bubble, your thoughts filled with random stuff like the one time jungwon face planted on the ground because he was busy staring at someone that he thought was cute, or when heeseung called you over so you could try his homemade ramen that you didn't want to admit that it tasted terrible or when jay said he'll take you to paris if you helped him with physics or when jake—

your train of thought abruptly ends when the boy, who was now calm and collected, taps your shoulder, making you look at him. the first thing you think of is how handsome he looked. he looked like one of those kdrama actors your friends keep on gushing about.

"can i borrow a pencil?" he sheepishly asks.

you realized you were staring so you immediately told him you did and handed it to him. he smiles gratefully and says, "oh my god i love you, thank you!" waves at you and focuses on the sketchpad that was in front of him. you sat there, mouth agape and hand still outstretched as if the pencil he previously asked for was still in your possession. he notices you still looking at him and gets confused. as if a lightbulb suddenly appears next to him, he covers his mouth.

"oh my god, i'm sorry. i say i love you a lot to my friends. it's just out of habit, i'm sorry."

you let out a small laugh and tell him it's fine. "people i meet for the first time don't usually tell me they love me, so it was a shock." the boy shakes his head again.

"i'm sunoo by the way, from class 3B." he says, hands outstretched. you take his hand and shake it. "i'm (name), from class 3A." sunoo warmly smiles at you and then you hear the teacher shout for the both of you to stop talking.

you don't regret shaking his hand, even if you got thirty more minutes added to your detention time.

the second one, the one that made you feel different.

you were sitting in your school's field, the poor grass being the victim of your ranting. you aggressively pick at it while sunoo listens to you talking about your problems.

"it's not like i can multitask sunny." you sigh. you've grown accustomed to his presence, even if you both were in different classes. you're also used to calling him sunny, the nickname fitting for his ebullient nature. sunoo radiated so much positivity and energy, it's hard not to miss him when you walk down the hallways. either he's with his friend group fooling around or helping students, sunoo was a ball of sunshine.

"i know (name). couldn't you just tell mr. nam that you can't do the maths competition? you already have a lot in your plate," sunoo asks, worry laced in his voice. you weren't necessarily a star student. you just did your best in everything that led you to achieve your goals, but that also means that teachers would depend a bit too much on you. winning competitions you've competed in, it brings joy to the school, but it just makes you feel drained.

"i already did and he said no. why can't he just ask jungwon? he's better at maths than me." you sighed, picking at a new soft patch of grass your eyes spotted. at a distance, you can hear the school bell ring. students rush back to their classrooms, leaving you and sunoo alone in the field.

"i have to get back (name). just tell me if you need help okay? i love you." sunoo says, beaming at you as he gently pats your shoulder before standing up and running back to his classroom.

you stare at his figure, feeling something weird on your stomach. this feels wrong, you thought. you decided to just ditch class and hide in the rooftop until the school day ends.

you get another detention slip the next day.

the third one, the one that made you want to stay with him forever.

you stare at jay in disbelief as he lists the things why he thinks you're in love with sunoo and why he thinks sunoo's in love with you too as well. jay dramatically reads out the list he has in his hands while both of you were situated under the shade of a tree on campus.

"i've only known the guy for five months jay, quit it!" jay gives you a sharp look and continues what he was doing. you roll your eyes and just listened to what he was saying.

you look at him differently, do you look at me and jake the same way as you look at him? you treat him differently, you bought him soup when he was sick. you get all shy and shit when he's around, you don't do that with us—

as if everything around you just fades, the thought of you possibly and you mean, POSSIBLY, liking sunoo was high. he was always there when you needed him. the shoulder to lean on, the one who helped you convince your teachers to be a bit nice to you, the one who held your hair when you threw up after getting food poisoning. did you really like him?

"oh my god (name), you zoned out. this is why i don't like you." you snap out of your daze. you grab jay's shoulders, causing the poor boy to get startled and scream.

"do i like sunoo, jay?" you ask him, the feeling of anxiousness setting in on you. jay rolls his eyes. "i don't know (name), you answer that."

the next few days were like a blur. you didn't see sunoo that much, even though your classrooms were right next to each other. you were busy with your upcoming art competition and you didn't have time to hang out with your friends. you were sitting on your seat, brainstorming on what to draw as a practice for the competition. jay and jake stopped by to drag you out for lunch but you didn't budge. you didn't even see their concerned glances for you.

and even after all the brainstorming, your mind just wanders to sunoo. his smile, the curve of his nose, his fox-like eyes. you mess up your hair. oh (name), you're screwed. as if on cue, the devil himself saunters to you and places a carton of milk chocolate and bread on your desk. you look up and was about to protest but he stops you with his finger on your lips.

"jay and jake hyung told me you wouldn't eat. i knoe you don't like being dragged to the cafeteria so here i am just delivering these to you."

you stare at the milk and bread before asking him, "can i draw you?" sunoo, completely caught off guard, just nods. "but you have to do me a favor." you look up at him, "and what's that?" he sits on your desk mate's chair and leans towards you, his face a mere few inches away from yours.

"go on a date with me."

a month later, with his hand tightly clutching yours, you look up at the sky to see that the rain is getting stronger as the moments go by. you squint at sunoo's attempt on locating his umbrella with only his one hand.

"you can just let go of my hand you know?" you say. he huffs and shakes his head sassily. "well i don't want to," and he returns to searching for it. he panics as he realizes that he probably left it on his desk this morning.

"i have one sunny, we can just use that." he smiles brightly. "oh my god you're a life saver," as he watches you like you were his whole world.

you giggle, taking out the umbrella, but this time you say it too. you were about to step out, umbrella over your heads as sunoo drags you back in again. you look at him, puzzled and asked him what's wrong.

"i know it's too early for this but i really love you. i really do. i just wish we can be classmates next year, i just want to see your face everyday."

your chest tightens at the sudden confession, but you smile nonetheless.

"i love you too sunny and yes, i wish we can be classmates too."

both of you step out of the building, giggling like teenage girls the moment the rain water hits both of your feet and you think, love never felt so good.

the fourth one, the one that hurt.

both of your wishes got granted. both of you got into the same class.

as you stand next to sunoo, graduation caps in hand while he kisses your cheek for a photo, you can hear his friends cheer for him. you laugh as he glares at his friends, telling them to 'fuck off'. you were happy, he was happy, that's what all it matters right?

wrong.

sunoo barges into your apartment, hands clutching his phone in anger. you were nowhere to be seen and he finds your roommate, solji, sitting on the dining room table eating. "where are they?" sunoo asks. solji tells him that you were at the library with kangmin.

kangmin.

he thanks solji and immediately goes to the library, spotting you and the guy, who he assumes as kangmin, sitting next to each other. you were too close to him, too close. you were explain something to kangmin while he just nods along. you were surprised when sunoo approaches you.

"what are you doing here?"

"we need to talk."

you found yourself sitting at the bench at your local park, cursing yourself for not bringing a better jacket to fight the cold. it was winter for christ sake. sunoo doesn't even notice you shivering due to the cold.

"are you cheating on me?" was the first thing he says.

"excuse me?" you ask, bewildered.

"i said, are you cheating on me?" he repeats, a bit louder this time.

"no! where the hell did you get that information?" he shakes his head and opens his phone, showing you a picture of you and kangmin, sitting too close to each other inside a cafe. too close.

"kangmin has a girlfriend sunoo. you don't trust me, do you?"

"yeah i don't." his answer throws you off.

"w.. what?" your voice is barely above a whisper.

"it's true when they say high school relationships don't last when you both get into university. we're in different schools (name)!"

"and i completely trust you! you have girls surrounding you twenty-four seven! do you see me doubting you?" you say, tears prickling your eyes as sunoo looks down.

"i've been dating you for two years now sunoo, i always trust you." you gently tell him, but sunoo just shakes his head.

"i don't want to do this anymore (name). i'm tired, painfully tired. we don't have time for each other and i.. i just-" sunoo stops. you were already crying, harshly wiping the tears away.

"you can't do this right now sunoo, i'm too stressed." he shakes his head, his decision was final.

"i'm sorry (name). if i just keep doubting our relationship, it's best if we part ways." sunoo stands up and leaves first, leaving you to sink in the shock. and then comes the pain, the guilt and then the anger.

once you got home, solji asks if you were okay. you nodded your head and went to your room. it was a mess. clothes scattered everywhere, some milk cartons on the floor and leftovers. you take in the sight and just started bawling in the middle of it. you stare at sunoo's love letters that were neatly placed on your desk, that he sends you every week ever since you both started university. you chuck it in your old shoebox and kicked it under the bed. you also noticed that you were wearing the jacket sunoo gave you for your birthday. you took it off and threw it your cabinet, hoping it won't see the daylight again.

you sit on your bed to process everything. you failed to notice the signs of your dying relationship. but you didn't fail to notice sunoo's last i love you that was too soft for you to hear. the last i love you sounding too much for a goodbye.

the fifth one, the one that feels familiar.

you bask in the smell of freshly brewed coffee as you walk inside the cafe. you were feeling amazing, finishing your thesis and submitting it on time. you greet the barista, sunghoon, and you give him your usual order. he smiles at you before walking away to make your drink.

again, as if you were still in high school, you were in your little bubble again. remembering jungwon faceplanting, heeseung's ramen, jay's paris trip offer and jake—

"(name)?"

you freeze. that voice, all too familiar.

sunoo.

you turn to him and forced yourself to smile. he still looked the same, maybe a bit matured now. his boyish charms still radiating. he dyed his hair into a mint color, he was wearing his favorite blue sweater that was probably worn out by now. he was staring at you, you were staring at him.

"how are you?" he manages to say.

"good, never been better actually. you?"

"good, graduating in a few months."

you smile. sunghoon comes back with your order and you pay for it, wanting to leave as soon as possible. saying you have moved on is a lie. you still want him. his embrace, every inch of him, you want it. but you can't. you know you can't. you thank sunghoon and giving sunoo one more glance, you bid him a goodbye.

you were a good few blocks away, sipping your drink to lure yourself away from the thought of going back and asking if he's single, that both of you could try again if you two were. but that's a selfish thought. he hurt you, he doesn't deserve a second chance. but you wanted him, does he still want you?

"(name)!"

you turned around and find sunoo, bending down to catch his breath, a scene that was too familiar, as if you were experiencing deja vu.

"yes sunoo?"

"i still love you." he says, standing upright facing you. you look at him with wide eyes.

"i still love you, i really do. heck i know it's been two years and it's still you. i tried dating again but no one compares to you. i tried writing you letters that i never mailed to you. i... i messed up." he stops abruptly, hands nervously clutching his backpack.

"do you still love me?"

you wrack your brain on what to answer. yes? no? probably? probably not? maybe? i moved on? im dating someone? im single? yeah we can date again?

"i.. i don't know.. you hurt me sunoo." he can't help but nod. he looks at you straight in the eyes, the familiar warmth still there.

"if you give me another chance, i promise, i won't fuck it up this time."

this was your chance, you want him, he wants you, what's the fuss all about? you were scared. you were scared that he won't trust you and you'll end up in the same position two years ago. but he's right in front of you (name), what's stopping you?

"f... fine, but this doesn't mean i'll forgive you this easy!" sunoo beams at you and pulls you in for a bone crushing hug, repeating the words "i love you" like a mantra.

"i'll make it up to you, i promise. i love you."

but he did make it up to you. even after years of being together, a beautiful silver band sitting peacefully on your ring finger, you still get flustered when sunoo comes up to you and tells you that he loves you. snuggling closer to you, sunoo whispers that oh so familiar three words that he tells you everyday, "i love you."

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