#special recognition for moments silence bc HOT AS FUCK

[thekingofspin]

here's my unbiased descriptions of the 3 biggest hozier albums:

Hozier: Happy, love and respect

unreal unearth: dramatic, sad

wasteland baby: HOT AS FUCK.

[lavenderlattaes]

loving you. | park jimin

⇒ summary/plot: It’s been three years since you left that night, three years since you last saw him and three years since you last spoke to each other. And on that very day that your heart decides to start missing him again, you see him smiling and laughing with a girl that is most definitely not you.

⇒ [ post-breakup! au ]

⇒ pairing: park jimin x reader

⇒ word count: 3.5k words

⇒ genre: fluff, angst

⇒ warnings: swear words

note: hellooo! im a weird person that likes angst then wants a happy ending sksks. Parts that are italicized are flashbacks! Ignore mistakes bc im a bit of a blind bat and enjoy!    ＼ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ／ ♡

[

Loving You   ❝I saw him the other day. His arms around another girl, his eyes when met with mine—were slow in their recognition.

I wonder if he remembers what I once told him.

I will love you forever.

He had smiled at me sadly before giving his reply.

But I am so afraid you may one day stop.

Now all these years later, I am the one who is afraid. Because I love him, I still do. I haven’t stopped. I don’t think I can. I don’t think I ever will. ❞   -Lang Leav   ]

You stare up at your ceiling, your thoughts drifting to him at half past 2 in the morning. Even then, he’s always been on your mind. You don’t think there was ever a time when he wasn’t filling up your thoughts. His name was Park Jimin and he was your first, and most likely last love.

You saw him yesterday, that’s what was keeping you up at night.

He had his arms around another girl, someone new, someone else who was making him smile, someone else who was kissing him, loving him, someone else who wasn’t you.

You remember every single detail of your short encounter yesterday.

You were leaving the café you both used to go to, Jimin’s favorite drink in your hand. You were particularly missing him that very day, when Namjoon decided to post a photo of you with them on Twitter. You had just crossed the street when you looked up and saw him walking with a girl in tow. You stopped in your tracks, not knowing what to do. Jimin was looking down at his phone but he looked up just when you were about to turn the other way and pretend you didn’t see him. He stopped walking too, and the girl he was with looked at him, confused.

“Chim? What’s wrong?” She asked, and her eyes followed Jimin’s until they landed on you.

Chim. You used to call him that too. He especially loved it when you called him that instead of Jimin. You gripped on the cup a bit tighter as you both look at each other. Your heart broke when Jimin broke eye contact slowly and looked at his girl.

He flashed her a sweet smile, the smile that used to make you all giggly inside. “It’s nothing, love. She just looks a bit familiar.” Jimin replied and laced his fingers with hers as they started walking again.

“In what way?” You heard her ask as they brushed past you, Jimin’s shoulder bumping with yours had caused you to close your eyes and let a few tears fall.

“She looks like an old friend.” Jimin replied and when you turned around to look at them for one last time, you locked eyes with Jimin again, a swirling mess of emotions swimming in his eyes. You looked down, your vision slightly blurred due to the tears filling up in your eyes.

“I, Y/L/N Y/N promise to love you, Park Jimin, today, tomorrow, and until the day we are forced to be apart. I will love you forever, and that will never change. Nothing will ever change my love for you and that’s the only promise I know for sure I will keep until I breathe my last.” You look up at the beautiful, precious man smiling down at you, his arms around your waist pulling you even closer.

“But what if you stop loving me? I’m scared of that,” he whispers, his tone teasing but because you knew him so well, you could hear the fear he’s trying to hide from you.

You cup his face in your hands, stand on your tiptoes and press a soft, gentle kiss to his lips. He smiles and kisses you back ever so gently, before you break apart for air. You caress his soft cheeks, causing him to giggle, his eyes disappearing from smiling so much. “That won’t ever happen, baby. And I promise you that.”

You’ve never broken that promise. You haven’t, and you won’t ever will. A soft ding from your bedside breaks you from your train of thoughts and you wipe the few stray tears that you didn’t realize were falling before turning over to grab your phone.

You squint, your eyes slowly adjusting to the brightness of your phone screen even though it was already at its lowest. You sit up once you read that it’s a text from Hoseok. You were closest to him and he was the one that introduced you to the boys, and of course, Jimin.

Hobi [2:43 am]: hey, how are you doing? It’s been a while.

You [2:43 am]: hey, hob. I’m okay, I guess. Why’d you text me at this hour? You should be getting some rest.

Hobi [2:44 am]: jimin told us he saw you yesterday, are you really okay?

You scoff at his text, but you also can’t help the tears from falling, a few of it dropping onto your phone. He told them he saw you, but he told his girlfriend that you just ‘looked like an old friend’? It would’ve been better if he hadn’t said anything to the boys. Your phone rings and you look down to see that Hoseok was already calling you. You clear your throat and wipe your tears away as you answer the call.

“Hey, you didn’t have to call you know,” You greet, pressing the phone to your ear.

“I know, but you left me on read and didn’t reply immediately. Also, I’m tired of typing so calling you would be easier.” Hoseok replies and you chuckle. You definitely missed him.

“So, will you tell me how you’re really feeling?” Hoseok says after a short moment of silence and you bite your lip.

“I saw Jimin, he saw me. I saw him with his arms wrapped around another girl, and he saw me with a cup of his favorite drink although I doubt he knows that it was his favorite drink that I had ordered because on that damn day, I was missing him so fucking much but I doubt that he also knows that I miss him.” You reply, the words spilling out of your mouth as fast as the tears slipped down your cheeks.

You can hear Hobi sighing on the other end you allow yourself to let your best friend know that you’ve been crying.

“Oh, Y/N. I wish I could be there to hold you, I’m so sorry.” He apologizes, and you shake your head but then remember he can’t see you.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for, Hobi. It’s my fault that all of this is happening, it’s okay.” You reply shakily.

“I’m supposed to protect you, remember? I’m supposed to kick Jimin’s ass for hurting you like this, because that’s what I promised you. I’m supposed to turn your frowns upside down and I’m supposed to be your sunshine. Overall, I failed at being your best friend. I resign from my post, Y/N.” Hoseok says, his voice sounding defeated, but it manages to make you giggle. You can almost see him pouting, folding his arms in front of him like a little child.

“You’re being overdramatic, Jung Hoseok. You’re the best best friend anyone could ever ask for and I’m not allowing you to ‘resign from your post’, okay?” You smile softly, putting emphasis on your words.

“Okay, okay, if you say so, Y/N.” Hobi replies, laughing, and you nod your head at that. You both enjoy the few short moments of silence before you break it with a question you’ve been dying to ask ever since.

“Hobi? How is he doing? Is he eating enough? Is he getting enough rest?” You hear Hobi sigh on the other end and you know that he knows what your words truly mean. You may not have said them out loud but the words you’re trying to get across are all the same. I still love him. I still love him even though it’s been three years since we broke up.

“He’s doing okay, Y/N. Yes, and I suppose so. He’s hardly around these days, he sleeps over at his girlfriend’s house.” It pains Hoseok to tell you the truth because it will hurt you a lot, but he also knows it would hurt you more if he tried to keep the truth from you.

Hoseok’s words pierce through your heart but there’s nothing you can do about it anyway. Jimin chose someone else to love, now. He chose to stop loving you and you can’t ever blame him for wanting to find happiness, even if that happiness meant you would be out of the picture.

You’ll continue to love him anyway because you know deep down your love for him won’t ever stop.

After a few more exchange of words between you and Hoseok, you hang up with him ending the call saying, “you should try seeing new people”, while you replied with “I will,” even though you know you won’t ever do that.

You place your phone back on your bedside table and your eyes land on your polaroids with Jimin strung across the wall. You valued your polaroid film so much, so you only took photos with it when the occasion was really special and significant. Your eyes scan the photos and you see the photo you took with him when you both confessed your feelings for the other, which was over six years ago. Your eyes then land on the polaroid of when you both went out for your first date. There were so many significant moments in your relationship with Jimin that it was making you cry.

You knew that there was no one else for you but Jimin, and you know that people will surely laugh at you for that and say that you’re only saying that because you’re young, and naïve when it comes to love.

If there’s one thing you’re certain of, it’s that you will love Jimin forever, even if he loves someone else. Even if it hurts you, even if it kills you, as dramatic as that may be, Park Jimin will be the only man you’ll ever love.

There’s a knock on your door and you look up from the book you were reading to look at the door. You couldn’t sleep after Hoseok called a few hours ago, so you opted for three mugs of coffee and a nice hot shower to help you relax a bit.

You weren’t expecting anyone today, so you only stare at the door, thinking that the amount of caffeine you drank was beginning to play tricks on your hearing, although it doesn’t seem possible. Another series of knocks come, and you jump up, realizing that you weren’t hearing things and there really was someone at your door.

You make your way to the door slowly, wracking your brain for any possible reason for the knocking on your door. Maybe you ordered something online and forgot about it? Maybe an old friend decided to send you mail? Maybe your neighbors needed something from you?

Your fingers twist the doorknob and you open the door. “Hey, what’s—” you stop short once you look up at the person standing outside your door.

Jimin.

He’s looking at you with an unreadable expression and if you didn’t know him any better, you wouldn’t notice the way his lips trembled slightly. But you did, and that was enough to make your heart race.

“Jimin—”

“Y/N—”

You both speak at the same time and if it weren’t for the tension in the air you both would’ve been laughing. You look away from him and bite on your lower lip as Jimin looks up and licks his lips.

“Can… can we talk?” Jimin asks quietly, and your eyes lock on his eyes again. And you’re surprised because you can see the pain and desperation in his eyes which weren’t there before. You nod gently and open the door wider for him. He takes his shoes off and he’s surprised to see that his slippers are still there. He puts them on anyway, and you close the door behind him. Just as you’re about to walk to the kitchen to fix something for the both of you, his warm hand latches onto your wrist, halting your actions.

Your breath hitches in your throat and you remember that night from three years ago like it was only yesterday.

“Don’t put this all on me, Y/N! You knew what you were getting into when you dated me!” Jimin shouts.

“Don’t remind me about that, Jimin! I know about that, I don’t need you to nag me about that because I know, I know, I know!” You shout back and Jimin sighs and runs a hand through his hair, frustrated.

“Then why are you complaining? Why are you being so selfish about all of this, you know how much my work means to me!” Jimin asks angrily and you glare at him.

“Is it too much to ask for my boyfriend to come home to me every once in a while? You’re hardly home these days, Jimin. I’m always worried about you!” You shout. You haven’t called him Chim the whole night and that was a bad thing. You always called him Chim and the fact that you kept on calling him Jimin was already a forewarning.

“I’m not having this conversation with you, Y/N. If you’re always worried about me then stop worrying about me!” Jimin shouts and that causes your heart to shatter. Would you ever stop worrying about him? You know you won’t, but his words hurt, and you’re hurt.

“Maybe I will then!” You shout, and brush past him, immediately regretting the words from ever leaving your lips. Jimin seems to think the same thing too, because his hand latches onto your wrist, stopping you.

“Wait, Y/N, no. Please, don’t go. I didn’t mean it, please, baby.” Jimin cries out and the tears fall down your cheeks like a waterfall. You want nothing more than to turn around, forget everything and run into his arms but you were hurt, and your pride was getting in the way.

“Jimin, let me go.” You manage to choke out, but Jimin wasn’t having it. He pulls you back and you crash into his arms, as he wraps his arms tightly around your waist. You’re both crying, and you know you won’t last much longer if you stay for another minute wrapped in his familiar embrace. You reluctantly remove his arms around you, your tears dropping onto his arms.

“No, please don’t leave me, baby. I’m sorry.” Jimin pleads, holding onto your hand as you step away from him. He holds onto it like his life depended on it, kissing it repeatedly. You shake your head and you fight the urge to turn back around because you know you’ll break.

“Let me go, Jimin.” You shake your hand off and he lets go of it reluctantly as you open the door and walk out the door, Jimin pleading after you. You hear him collapse to the floor as you close the door shut behind you.

“I love you, Y/N. And I’m sorry.”

Those were Jimin’s last words to you and that was the last time you ever saw him again.

“Y/N.” You turn around and Jimin’s eyes widen when he sees the tears streaming down your cheeks. He pulls you into his embrace and you break down completely. He wraps his arms tightly around you and you wrap your arms around his waist.

“Jimin, I-I’m so, so sorry. I shouldn’t have said all those things, I shouldn’t have left the way I did, I shouldn’t have hurt you at all,” You cry into his shirt, your tears soaking his black shirt and your voice coming out in shaky sobs.

He shushes you, rubbing his arms up and down your back as his own tears fall down and drop onto your hair. “I’m so sorry, too, Y/N. I should’ve fought for you, I shouldn’t have let you go like that.” He replies, and you hug him tighter.

You both stay in that position, Jimin whispering words of comfort in your ear as he rocks the both of you back and forth. You close your eyes, breathing in his familiar scent as you bury your head deeper in his chest.

After a few more minutes you pull away and wipe the tears from your eyes, a sigh leaving your lips. You look up at Jimin and see him looking at you already.

“What is it?” You ask and Jimin steps forward and tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear. Your cheeks heat up at his actions and you look down.

“I broke up with her yesterday.” Jimin whispers causing you to look up at him.

A newfound hope fills you and you clear your throat. “Chim?” You whisper softly, and you can see the effect it has on Jimin when you call him that, because he reaches out to hold your hand in his, intertwining your fingers together.

“Yeah?” He breathes out and you breathe shakily. “Do you remember what I told you all those years ago?” You ask, and he just looks into your eyes, not sure about what you meant.

“I, Y/L/N Y/N promise to love you, Park Jimin, today, tomorrow, and until the day we are forced to be apart. I will love you forever, and that will never change. Nothing will ever change my love for you and that’s the only promise I know for sure I will keep until I breathe my last.” You repeat your words from five years ago, your eyes not leaving Jimin’s.

Jimin’s eyes widen, remembering the exact moment; it was his favorite memory with you and also the scariest. It was on your one-year anniversary.

“But what if you stop loving me? I’m scared of that,” Jimin repeats his words and marvels in the beautiful smile that makes its way onto your face because he remembers.

“That won’t ever happen, baby. And I promise you that.” You reply, and you let go of his hand to cup his cheeks as he smiles at you as well.

“I’ve kept my promise, Chim. I always have.” You whisper softly, and that’s all it takes for Jimin to dip down and press his lips to yours in a longing kiss. Jimin wraps his arms around your waist, pressing you closer to him and you stand on your tiptoes. You run your hands through his hair and you smile because you missed the way his soft hair felt in your hands. His hands rub on your sides gently causing you to giggle and break from the kiss.

“Chim! It tickles,” You tell him, and he smiles so brightly, his eyes start to disappear like always. He pulls you closer because you stepped back slightly, and you smile at him being clingy again. You missed it so much. He kisses your forehead and you close your eyes, smiling.

“I know, I just missed hearing your laugh. It’s my favorite thing ever.” He says, and he rubs his nose against yours lovingly as you bite on your bottom lip.

“Really? So you don’t like my kisses?” You tease, stepping away from him and he whines, pulling you back to crash his lips to yours again. You smile into the kiss and pull away right after kissing back, Jimin’s pout making an appearance at your actions. You giggle, and smile at him as he smiles back. He steps closer to you and you stay rooted in your spot, watching his every move.

“I love everything about you, Y/N.” Jimin states and his words make your heart melt into a puddle. He holds your hands up to his face and kisses each one of your fingers, and he kisses your knuckles as well. Your face heats up at his actions, even though Jimin has always been like this— romantic. Skinship was a constant between you two but it’s been so long since Jimin has held you like this, it was like falling in love with him all over again.

“And I love everything about you too, Jimin.” You reply and step into his arms. He buries his face in your neck and starts leaving little kisses there. You giggle as you wrap your arms around him, kissing the top of his head.

“I missed you so much, Y/L/N Y/N,” Jimin sighs happily and you hug him tighter.

“I missed you too, Park Jimin. So much.” You reply and close your eyes, a smile on your lips.

I love him, I still do. I haven’t stopped. I don’t think I can. I don’t think I ever will.

⇒ let me know what you think or hmu with anything under the sun here!